#i am so tired already... i feel im gonan falla sleep
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I was stressed but now i'm more chill and really sleepy...
#overall my mood has been better but i am so incredibly terrified of the future... its like....#like i feel as if someone has holding me at gun point and got told thst if i did any mistakes they would shoot#but then im not given clear instructions on what i need to do and i have to figure it out myself#i am really scared... even tho all of this gave me a new objective... i dont wanna be obsolete...#... so... that what we will work on... also... i wanna work towards my dreams...#I've been putting it off for so long i want to do it#people support me and actually enjoy my voice... i want to...#the things on my plate right now are things i can achieve... but i want more... i want things i actually want...#i want...#my house has a constant buzzing sound. i believe its because of the small power plant behind the lot. which makes it difficult for recording#since i have to get rid of that and that messes with the rest of the audio#its comforting to know it wasnt the mic tho... heh...#tomorrow lets try to take the first few steps... well more like lets try to continue with the set up#we have already a couple stuff but we still have a lot missing...#... today the girls said some stuff that impressed me... thats how im perceived?... is that what people think of me?#i kinda want to... fulfill those 'expectations'... they dont expect anything but its more of a me thing... ive been dreaming and hoping for#so long but i dont take the next step. i never do... and its because of the executive dysfunction... but... once i get the hang of it...#once i do... everything will be excellent... and we will take it easy#i am so tired already... i feel im gonan falla sleep#seari talks
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