#he's still like. adult man who lives his life. and does stuff on his own time. | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

nagy-bari · 3 months

Text

on the appeal of Chilchuck Tims

short spoilery rambles on why i zero-ed in on this old man instantly and how i realized the patterns he gets to people.

subversion of the trope: oh they just look like a child while actually they are XXXX years old and--- yes. he's older than he looks, with a good 10 years and it's a boyman design now instead of a loli girl.

BUT wait there's more!

he's older than he looks and he has the experience of his actual age: that man is a father. of 3. the story he's in is his midlife crisis. he's planning on retiring from dungeering after this, he asked for payment UPFRONT (and got it) he has insane (for other characters, but really he's just normal, tries to be normal) work ethics - he got paid, he does the job, he's good at the job, he knows his own worth, strength and limits.

This Man Is Self Aware. He knows his weakness, the job's weakness (how adventure parties slip up and why) he knows he's seen as a bit closed up and he's OKAY WITH THIS.

what he's not okay with? not knowing if a party member is a cannibal or not when they are on this insane survival trip and he's the cook. what does he do?

he knows how to communicate and how much to disclose. Rare one, i know. With the party having an average gossip queen, an autistic foodie, and mysterious chef he knows when to take the lead so they can still function.

so to round it up:

Subversion of the 'looks young actually old', closed up and grumpy rouge who's motto is 'never trust those who don't ask for payment' and has the 'it's called personal life for a reason' philosophy rooted into their blood. Good? good.

BUT WAIT THERE'S MORE

because he knows he and all halffoots look young to others he actually started up a guild so they can re-enforce their rights as adults and independent people, so they are taken seriously and they can work against bad stereotypes and all.

we see his struggle through volumes, how hard it is for others to finally understand that a short live-spam people is actually just as old and mature as a long live-spam would be, it's mostly the numbers that are different.

we can learn with the other character to take him seriously, to accept the differences.

so he has good work ethic, looks out for his people, has plans for his and other's future, CARES for the future in general and ACTS so it will be a reality- rather sooner than later.

so he's charismatic and lovable while still being the usual tsundere setup for any joke.

BUT WAIT

THERE'S MORE

we first learned that he's actually is an adult (middle aged in half-foot culture)

is an estranged husband

who was left by his wife

cause he cheated-

BUT WAIT ACTUALLY NO

HE LIES ABOUT THE CHEATING!

cause he wants to keep his work persona intact, and it fits more if he says he cheated, cause then people won't BOTHER him with further details

BUT HE DIDN'T

he just went home one day and the wife was gone, with a note

and we learn ALL of this through a subversion of a UNICORN BICORN TALE - a feckin roll up of the whole pure maiden true virtue stuff - and we find out cause the feckin monster SNEERS AT HIM for lying then bites him.

so he's really soft with all the hidden 'better keep to yourself' and don't jump to conclusions cause that only fuels drama, which will hinder your work. but he was clearly hurt by this.

so the subversion here? we are Marcille. the whole fandom is Marcille. we are just as nosy and gossipy as her and it's a tiny little metanarrative joke and i love it, it's wonderful writing and it keeps you wanting more and more, you want this grumpy middle aged father to finally tell you his life story, the mundane little things, to see him brag about his children and all cause he's so goshdarn professional about everything.

but is it subversion at all?

wait...

there's more.

while we get actual introduction to his daughters we truly never seen anything about his wife.

it reaches the hights of Mrs. Columbo level of secrecy and i love it.

but! we know:

they were childhood friends

married when Chilchuck was 13 (almost full grown adult for their culture) and had the twins(?)

left their village at 14

3rd daughter at 15

he started adventuring at age 24 and formed the guild.

wife left when he was 25

Chilchuck started to work with Laios at 26.

he's now almost 29.

they were childhood friends and married for a good 10 year. he was there when he was needed to be a good dad (he's clearly proud of his daughters) and their fallout only started when he started adventuring.

let me say it again.

they. were. childhood. friends.

as much as we see the unfolding of young love in media, with all the teen dramas finding true and forever love in highschool and live happily with the white picket fence for 50+ years we see less of the loves that fizzle out, but were and probably will be friends.

love this. love this little detail cause there's so much in it. The confusion, the still remaining anger, the fustration. they probably would be able to talk it out. they've known each other for most of their life, but his logic and compromises for work (clear communication and a clear head) does not work here.

we don't know how exactly he feels and i love that, but we know he struggles to be open about 'mushy' feelings, grand gestures and all.

he knows his limits. His wife probably knows it too. That's why she's with the middle daughter. The assumed-ly closest to her rather than the oldest (locksmith) or the youngest (conartist?freelancer?life-artist???)

if we learned anything from Dungeon Mushi, it's that Kui Ryoko is a master of diverse characters visually and personality wise as well.

you can reverse engineer the wife if you want to from the girls but i love the joke and the actual comfort this whole Mrs. Columbo it gives.

cause Chilchuck has Columbo vibes. He's competent in his work, knows his limits, knows how to help others and when, knows when to quit and when to move on. and this tiny flaw of his, this domestic mystery we assume is his background (and ground of his disarming normality) is just enough to keep you thinking and re-think and re-think and just grow to love and appreciate the little details and love that was poured into this character of many in this wonderful story.

BUT WAIT

THERE'S MORE

yes he's a father

the dad jokes. oh my good the hidden dad jokes all through-out the series.

the 'i don't want a pet' ---- 'proceeds to be unseparable from said pet' meme with Izutsumi

the actual care and attention he can give when someone is distressed

the TALK with Senshi. that moment.

he's a proud father

but he's above all - practical

well that's all the mad rambling i had in me for now

if you read through this thank you

and do share your thoughts and finds - and ideas about the wife.

#chilchuck's wife #chilchuck tims #dungeon meshi #spoilers #character ramble #with pictures this time #kudos for Kui Ryoko for sharing her lovely OCs and this wonderful adventure #and for all the backlore #and all the jokes #go read it if you haven't

539 notes · View notes

abyssalzones · 3 months

Note

C-PTSD as a diagnosis makes so much sense for Ford because he really does fit almost all of the criteria, ESPECIALLY if you take the stuff in J3 into account in conjunction with his traumatic childhood (bullying, bad dad, etc.). It just makes sense in regards to his motivations and his issues with interpersonal relationships (like with Stan). Also buring yourself in your work (like he does) is a very common 'flight' coping mechanism to trauma in adults

I'm smiling like this right now

ford's whole.... mental health deal is extremely interesting to examine because Oh my god this man is the textbook image for "reacting to ongoing, continuous trauma". intentional or otherwise (I'm inclined to believe it's both).

like. okay hang on I'm about to get very in depth with it

I feel like there's no way this entire guy's life and in some ways his lasting identity haven't been defined by and constructed around various forms of trauma, maybe the most obvious and true-to-canon-intent being peer abuse/bullying from childhood. a lot of people downplay the impact of this type of abuse but it's... responsible for a lot of social ills in shocking ways. (if you're more interested in this topic here is an article my friend mer linked me a while back, it gets into it very deeply)

(a lot of this is going to be sourced from the wikipedia page for CPTSD [and my own experience Living with it] which I realize isn't very professional of me but Whatever this is tumblr)

one of the core tenets of ford's personality is that he's Different. he owns it, sure- his six fingers become a point of pride rather than something to be ashamed of- but they make it extremely clear that from a young age he associated being different with being a social pariah. ford's generation was characterized by notoriously cruel bullying, and anything that remotely made you stand out rendered you a target. ford could've been bullied for being nerdy and jewish (and failing to perform socially, ie dating) alone, having such an obvious mutation definitely was not winning him any points.

so it's honestly no surprise, when from childhood ford feels like he has One person in the world to trust and confide in, that he would go on to form very unhealthy attachment patterns typical of CPTSD. as you elaborated on regarding AvPD (which I know far less about but seems to have comorbidity with CPTSD): if you're hard-wired to believe socializing with others results in failure or betrayal, then you're not going to make an effort. but what does end up happening is that you're going to pour all of your trust and dependency into one person at a time, one person who is "safe".

previously, that was his brother. and it's not really hard to draw the conclusion from there that fiddleford was a subject of ford's attachment style, considering he was his One friend from college, and... one of Maybe two people ford is friends with at all who he isn't related to. he cites him as the only person he can possibly trust to work on the portal project alongside him, and he still can't bring himself to tell him the full truth, because he's terrified of losing him. I love their dynamic (I do think they were mutual best friends, and there was no small amount of trust reciprocated between them. "fiddleford was weird as hell too" is something I keep coming back to) and I don't think it's built on entirely unhealthy terms, but that kind of pressure is... setting things up to crash and burn.

enter bill stage left. back to "continuous yearning to be liked and accepted"- this guy knew that and made every effort to prey on ford's insecurities to reel him in as close as possible. this is what really pisses me off about the idea that bill was just "inflating ford's ego", because it's way, way more insidious than that. throughout the entirety of journal 3 we see ford reintroduce someone to his life he has a very positive relationship with (fiddleford) and how that trust gets gradually broken down by bill's influence "winning out" over their friendship. I think it's safe to say ford was already vulnerable: from the start, he'd been isolated in his research for six years (and it's unclear for how long he'd known bill by 1982), and bill proved time and time again to be someone who wouldn't judge him, someone who would praise him for his hard work, and perhaps most critically, make him feel like being different was something special.

like that's... that's really not good!!!! and that kind of thing works wonders on someone who has already settled with the idea that they're inclined to be alone just by design.

trying to put a cap on this. in relationships like the one he's had with his brother or fiddleford it doesn't even necessarily have to be ""toxic"" (vague term anyway) or outwardly bad to be built on unhealthy attachment patterns, and considering for a good chunk of ford's life his attachment to others can be characterized as "I can only trust ONE person at a time" it feels essential to any discussion of his CPTSD or canon trust issues. That is something that happens a lot in Real cases of CPTSD (hi) and only further snowballs into More trauma by leaving you vulnerable to manipulation and abuse (see: bill.)

I've been going on for way too long now and I feel like I've only scratched the surface of the thing I wanted to elaborate on sorry. that post traumatic stress disorder can complex

#lab notes #I woke up and had to answer this before anything else but I really need to Eat so apologies if this is all over the place. running on empty #edit: this is ok to reblog ! all of my gf theorizing/analysis is unless I clarify it isn't for whatever reason

101 notes · View notes

walrus150915 · 4 months

Text

Nimona headcanons part 3 bc I'm insane (out of order and disorganized so like- be ready) and bc it's my new year gift for y'all

• Nimona mostly talks like a normal teen but sometimes she'd use words that show her real age. "Sonorous", "vapidity" n stuff like that. Her vocabulary is INSANELY huge

• Ambrosius tries not to swear so he uses a lot of silly replacements instead. "HOLY S- golly!!", "You son of a b- bishop". Like I'm sorry but he's the type of guy to say fricking instead of, yknow, the intended word. Ballister finds it endearing; Nimona finds it stupid

• Yes yes he does replace sex with lovemaking. Yes he purely refers to him and Bal going at it as "making love". Yes he's a fellow like that

• Ballister doesn't drink alcohol. I know that's implied in the movie that he drinks (although I thought he drank, like, soda?? On the other hand he is a wholeass thirty years old man who's seen some shit so I wouldn't be surprised) but idk he strikes me as a type to refuse drinking out of moral code. He doesn't eat pork for the same reasons (pushing my cultural Muslim Ballister agenda)

• Ambrosius drinks only during celebrations or parties. Not much because he's a light drinker😭 one cup and he's already lying on the floor, crying and hyperanalyzing his life

• after Nimona came back Ambrosius was not safe from her jokes. Neither of them despised each other (not after Nimona saved the whole Kingdom and not after Ambrosius proved he really isn't a jerk) but boy does Nimona make fun of him on any given occasion. Ambrosius was taken aback by this at first but then he just got used to it

• Ambrosius is being kinda petty and jealous when Ballister spends more time with Nimona than him ("Although now apparently he's got a new best friend, what's that about?!"), not in a way that'd make it unhealthy ofc but still😭. Him and Ballister were tied to the hip for like the most of their lives and now there's someone ELSE Ballister likes to hang out with? Ugh🙄

• Ambrosius had a diary when he was a teen, he didn't write much there (one or two sentences a day). Once he became an adult he kind of forgot about it but after the whole... Hunting stuff started happening he found himself writing a ton of sentences there again

• when him and Bal started dating Ambrosius had a whole page in that diary filled with "Ambrosius Boldheart" HE'S A GUY LIKE THAT OKAY

• Ambrosius likes to attack Ballister's face with quick little kisses. If he pecked his forehead he must peck his cheeks and nose and eyelids and cheekbones etc etc

• Nimona sometimes speaks in rhymes. She doesn't know how she's doing it but her tongue just does it on its own. ("Let's go dunk on the punk in the trunk")

• Ballister has actually been a year older than everyone in his class, another reason why he was the black sheep™

• Ambrosius can play the flute and the piano due to his noble upbringing he HATES whenever someone brings it up tho

• Nimona and Ballister have those nights where they recall historical facts and situations and Nimona shows her perspective of the things. "The guy claimed to be a war criminal was the biggest sweetheart in the world what are you onnn". Ballister wrecks his brain trying to understand if she's serious or not

• Ballister doesn't get a lot of the jokes, they just fly over his head. Only after some time he starts getting them, like in the middle of the night randomly going "ohhhh that's what she meant"

• first time Ambrosius and Ballister made out Ambrosius threw his hands in the air and said "yayy :D"

• Ballister's haircare routine is better than you think it is he's just casual about it. Yes he uses coconut oil like his life depends on it

• Ambrosius's complexion is leaner but Bal's is broader. So when they exchange clothes it doesn't fit because Bal's shirts are too loose on Ambrosius but also kinda short and Ambrosius's are kinda long but too tight in the shoulders for Bal. They still think it's sweet to swap their clothes sometimes

#this one is kinda short #but still #nimona #ambrosius goldenloin #ballister boldheart #goldenheart #nimona headcanons

72 notes · View notes

codenamesazanka · 1 year

Text

Spinner used to be a hikikomori and NEET, which means he was a recluse who wasn’t in school or employment (and technically still isn’t) and had withdrawn even from his family to hide out in his room.

We get two one-panel flashbacks to this era of his life and the imagery prove the label undeniable. As official Viz translator Caleb Cook notes:

…Book stacks, tied-up garbage bags, general clutter. This is the classic NEET/hikikkomori living space, as portrayed in media like Welcome to the NHK and other series. It screams "young adult whose life is in shambles.” There's huge visual contrast between a NEET apartment and a teen's room in manga/anime. The latter is almost always spick and span. In Japanese media, excessive clutter is often a visual marker for characters who have failed society's expectations of them. Practically a trope.

Going by this imagery, guess who else is a hikikomori/NEET— or, is (supposed to be) read as a hikikomori/NEET?

Shigaraki Tomura’s room fulfills all the requirements of this trope, down to every tiny bit of filth on the floor. There’s really no difference between his and Spinner’s room.

And Spinner likely recognizes this. While everyone else is watching Shigaraki after they escape from Kamino - minus Mr. Compress and Toga who are talking - Spinner is the only one staring at the dirty floor, lost in his own thoughts.

＊

I’ve seen meta before about how Shigaraki’s living conditions are a direct result of All For One’s lack of proper education - that All For One purposefully wants Shigaraki to have bad hygiene, to wallow in his own filth and just completely neglect any basic upkeep. Just another way to whittle him down. That’s a fair assumption, but I think it’s worth pointing out that in Tenko’s early years living with All For One, his room is neat and clean, even after he starts to accumulate toys and books and general stuff.

The best time to teach a child to set (or not set) habits is when they’re young, and clearly Tenko knew at least to not toss litter around carelessly, to put things away, and even to make his bed:

Of course, it could be that the teaching of deterioration started when AFO gave Shigaraki Tomura his name, but the people around Shigaraki the most have always shown to be neat and proper: AFO is always dressed in a suit; the Doctor’s lab is crowded with a lot going on, but not dirty; Kurogiri, who we assume has been babysitting Shigaraki for years, keeps the bar immaculate. AFO’s other wards also live in neat, clean environments:

That’s not to say AFO didn’t contribute at all to Shigaraki’s hikikomori vibe - simply keeping someone isolated and depressed will bound to make a mess of their mind and that will be reflected in the environment; just that AFO didn’t have to purposefully teach Shigaraki not to clean up after himself - he didn’t need to when Shigaraki does it on his own.

In any case, Shigaraki reads as a hikikomori/NEET from the start, someone alienated from society and wildly off the typical, proper life path expected of him as a young man, and resents the rest of the world for it.

＊

Combining the two observations, I think this is another aspect to why Spinner had so quickly grew attached to Shigaraki after the Doc calls Shigaraki a loser

Being hikikomori/NEET is just another commonality they both share, in Spinner’s eyes. Before the crumbling, glittery horizon of Deika; even before the revelation of Shigaraki’s grand ‘Destroy Everything’ goal, Spinner was just some depressed 20-something-year-old who saw another depressed 20-something-year-old and recognized their similar pain, then wanting to lift that burden somehow, however he could.

＊

*Important to note: Often hikikomori/NEETs are seen as failures that can really only blame themselves, lazy parasites on their families and society. Of the three hikikomori the series have shown so far - Shigaraki, Spinner, La Brava - the story have been careful to clearly draw a line between the marginalization they face and why they ended up how they did. Shigaraki was kidnapped by a criminal mastermind; Spinner stayed inside for his own protection because walking outside got him sprayed with pesticides, among other things; and La Brava was bullied and mocked by her peers. Horikoshi have made all three characters incredibly sympathetic and made the root cause of their alienation not from faults of their own but from how society had failed them.

#Spinner #Shigaraki Tomura #nalslastworkingbraincell #bnha #mha #HeroAca #hikikomori #NEET #worldbuilding #?

508 notes · View notes

igotanidea · 4 months

Text

Sous chef : Sam Winchester x reader cook AU (part 1)

sous chef fr): works directly under the head chef

Request: Sammy has his own restaurant, he is a Chef, he works in the administration almost always and usually cooks once a week at the place, he falls in love with the reader. Age gap but everything legal, he cooks for her, she falls in love with his food! and the excellent sex with him (played with it a bit, hope you'll like it anon :)

***

Before we start this story we have to make one thing clear.

Y/N was not a silly teenage rom-com heroine.

Did she watch them? Yes. Did she read them? Yes, absolutely.

But only for the funsies.

It was not like the “To all the boys I’ve ever loved” plotline.

Not like she was only living the fantasy inside her head, too scared to act on her own feelings.

It was not – god forbid – like the After plotline and Y/N was not the good girl focused only on her school stuff not wanting to have anything to do with the bad boys and boys at all.

No way in hell.

She had her own amount of love drama and with the slightly wild character she was more than ready for a new chapter in her life.

College.

Parties, boys, skipping classes and making out in the toilets, sneaking under the professors’ nose.

And now, ladies and gentlemen, let’s talk reality.

She was a nice girl. A kind spirit. A dreamer.

With a vision, sharp tongue and good priorities.

Not a pushover but also not the most popular. Not the sharpest crayon in the box, but street smart. If you asked Y/N Y/L/N how she classified herself she would probably answer in the middle. She could get lost inside her own head trying way too hard to figure things out instead of just letting it unravel and go with a flow. Dead set on putting some sort of label on herself to find out where she belongs. Which was still bound to happen.

She has just moved to the new city to college and what was better way to get acquainted with the surroundings and fellow students than –

- having a little trip? (I’m pretty sure you thought party, huh?)

In her defence – she tried partying, but seeing her college friends drunk dancing and throwing up because they actually wanted to let loose and have a big opening of the year was a bit too much. Therefore, she grabbed her girls, completely ignored their whining about ruining the mood and baptized as Y/N, the destroyer, dragged them out into the city.

That’s how they found this little nice restaurant in the suburbs. Nothing too fancy nor too expensive for a students’ budget but good enough for a group of young adult women who just started living (almost) on their own.

It was nice to have a ladies’ night. At least until the door to the restaurant opened and a representative of the opposite sex entered causing all the females to raise their gazes. A little rascal definitely noticed the sudden commotion in the henhouse cause he shot them a teasing gaze and winked in a flirtatious manner before heading towards the counter smiling widely at the other man standing there.

“Is he gay?” Y/N asked, barely holding back a chuckle, while observing the whole scene

“Who?”

“That guy who just entered!”

“What?” her friends laughed collectively “Dean Winchester being gay? Damn Y/N. He had more girls in his bed in last two months than any of us will have in our whole life!”

“Are you a lesbian then, f/n?”

“What?”

“You said he had more girls than any of us-“

“oh shut it! Slip of the tongue, you know what I mean!”

“so not gay?”

“definitely.”

“who’s the other one then?” Y/N took a sip of her drink pointing out behind her back.

“He?”

“yes he! Do you see any other good looking guys around?”

“That’s Sam.” f/n replied and went quiet teasing Y/N on absolute purpose.

“Care to elaborate or are you too busy foaming at the mouth while checking out that Dean guy?”

“Can you blame me? Damn, have you seen his-?”

“f/n!”

“face! Have you seen his face?” Y/N rolled her eyes in frustration. “they are brothers. Obviously. Sam’s a chef and Dean ... well, I am not sure what he does for a living but I’m all up for the bad boy style and attitude.”

“dare I ask?”

“you better not. I see that little blush on your face so enjoy your little teenage rom-com moment.” f/n laughed sipping her drink though the straw purposefully making it loud to get the man’s attention and be the eyecatcher on Y/N’s behalf.

“stop it!” Y/N shushed suddenly feeling eyes on her back, almost burning the hole and – ironically – do making her blush.

“and what if I don’t?”

“you’re crazy!”

“and you’re too shy for your own good. Come one, live a little. Have a hot, steamy romance. Free yourself! Burn the bra!”

“What?”

“It’s a figure of speech!”

“I know what it means!” Y/N laughed and shook her head at her friend’s stupidity. However, instead of leaving or making a scene she just raised her own glass in a celebratory gesture “cheers!”

And now – tell me, in your honest opinion, don’t you think that few young woman in an almost empty restaurant at the very late hour, laughing and acting the way young carefree girls should, would get some looks, even if covert?

***

Once the academic year got off the ground the time seemed to pass in an accelerated speed. Before anyone noticed the beginning of October turned into November and then everyone started slowly thinking about actual work and getting some work as a source of income.

Y/N was no exception to this rule. Between mingling, being a socially engaged person, going out with friends, studying, preparing for exams, finding little time for her hobbies and currently fighting for an internship, her life was simply crazy.

So she wandered around the city alone to get at least a bit of peace of mind. Not having any specific destination in mind, just letting her feet lead her to whatever place she might find herself in. Just being and floating in space, allowing her imagination and creativity run free, unrestrained by a rigid schedule.

The old bookshop looking like it was taken straight from the Harry Potter universe might have been a spot where she’s been spending most of her time, to such extend that the owner learned her name. moreover, she even started helping him in running the business which was quite good practice given the fact she was studying business and economics. And for one more reason too.

***

“I’m here, sorry for being late! Bus was delayed due to the weather and –“ she walked through the door shaking of the snow not realising that there was a client present and Bobby was nowhere to be found. That meant she was supposed to serve the man standing by the counter, whose face she could not see at the moment. “Morning sir. What can I help you with?” swiftly she hung her damp coat and hat on the hanger and approached him. “Sam?” the name escaped her before she bit her tongue.

“Hi. Do I know you?” the man frowned in confusion, but it was not a confused expression of someone offended by being called by his given name, rather a sympathetic question of someone trying hard to refresh his memory.

“No.” she shook her head with a smile of embarrassment “no you don’t, not really. But my friend got eyes for your brother, you should warn him about a feisty female sharpening her claws.”

“I am pretty sure Dean can handle- wait, you’re that girl from the restaurant.”

“Good memory. Surprisingly good, actually.” She reached her hand towards him “I’m Y/N Y/L/N. It’s only fair to tell you my name since I already know yours.”

“Nice to meet youY/N. You work here?”

“More like volunteer. Full time student, part time bookseller. Doesn’t seem like a match made in heaven, does it?”

“Well, I bet you wouldn’t expect to see a chef searching for a book, will you?”

“I’m not judgmental.” She shrugged taking a look at the pile of volumes in his hands “but choosing modern sci-fi crime and mythology books is a bit surprising. For a guy in general.”

“It’s just side interest. And actually I was hoping Bobby would find something that would be more complex than a manifestation of the author's exuberant and non-realistic imagination”

“Wow, now that’s the wording.”

“for a chef?” Sam smirked.

“For a person. Anyone else would just say the book was fucked up.”

“Thought you weren’t judgmental?”

“I wasn’t.” Y/N shrugged and grinned at him “till you said that you’re pretty much looking for fantasy book with no fantasy in it.”

“Then why do I get the feeling you know perfectly where to find one?”

“Challenge accepted Mr. Winchester.”

#sam winchester x reader #sam winchester #sam winchester x you #sam winchester x y/n #sam winchester fic #sam winchester fanfiction #sam winchester smut #supernatural x reader #supernatural x you

76 notes · View notes

landwriter · 1 year

Note

1589 got me feeling&rambling and I'm so sorry beforehand that I can't keep it short and simple, as would probably befit the thing. Feel free to ignore if not interesting to you, still you are the one that comes to mind when thinking about Hob being morally grey.

That scene is always so painful to watch, mostly because Hob is behaving like such a sorry fool. He has really decked himself out to impress his stranger and misses the mark so dramatically.

(Whereas Dream seemingly has not held back either - I mean it's easily his hottest look, you can't tell me he didn't mean to make a lasting impression. So much disappointment on both sides.)

Cringe Hob as part of the dark Hob spectrum, his self-importance/selfishness showing - of course it's not pure fun to watch, but I'm always so fascinated by that flicker of pain (foreshadowing shame) that comes right to the surface in all his put on show, just before he orders the lamb. The contrast makes for a very intense moment, imo. And I am wondering, has he really left all of this behind by 1889? Or is he simply more smooth by that time (that's what I'm getting from the show) ? In fanfics his flaws are mostly depicted as minor or serving a good end in modern times, he is always such a goodie by then (and I love him, of course). But can we imagine just a trace of more questionable/offputting Hob in the mix (if only on impulse) - to be clear, I have no idea how that would work. Or should we just be grateful that that lies behind him (it certainly makes for a much more likeable character and a nicer love story)?

(me force feeding myself more of the horrible stuff I just wanted to avoid looking at)

It's a beautiful contrast: opulence and insecurity. Success and asking still for validation. I have Thoughts on each meeting (please send me asks about them) - ostensibly the very first fannish thing I did for this show, and also in my adult life, was rewatch the meetings and pause constantly and take - oh holy Christ over 4,000 words of notes.

I propose Hob is not acting like a sorry fool. Sure, some bits are clearly played for comedy. Hob is selfish, self-important, and given to hedonism. He is concerned primarily with his own comfort and the personal pleasures of life. But I blame 1589 pretty solidly on Dream. In 1489, after being asked what his experience is like, he answers Dream with an inarticulate statement spoken by a true person who just Digs The Experience of Experiencing: it's 'fucking brilliant' and 'all changing'. Dream asks how, Hob literally looks around the room like a student who forgot an essay was due, and names chimneys and playing cards. Handkerchiefs. Simple things - still sensual things - but simple ones. Certainly no sociopolitical discourse here. What will you people think of next, says Dream, deeply sarcastic and visibly disinterested. And Dream also asks him: but what is Hob doing with his time? This, too, he is under-prepared to answer. Soldiering, banditry, bit of printing press work. Hardly enough to impress this supernatural lord, and Hob can tell.

When he is granted, explicitly, another 100 years by Dream, it is not only a relief, but I think a part of Hob squares its jaw in that moment and says: I'll show him - I'll show him what I can do in a century, I'll earn his pleased regard. Not necessarily because he's even, you know, madly in love at this point, but because he's in it for the living, does not intrinsically have great ambitions, but does have someone who has a) seemingly granted him this greatest gift and b) is unimpressed with what he's doing with it. And he's lost everyone he knew. Dream is now his oldest acquaintance, and wouldn't it be nice if he liked Hob?

He knows only the language of what impresses other men, and this is what he achieves. But to Dream, both Hob's socially-valued successes and his deeply personal ones are terrifically uninteresting. They are not New Dreams To Spur The Minds Of Men. There is no new story in a man seeking fortune and having a wife and a child he loves. He is ancient as the first dreaming thing, and he is Bored. He is, in fact, soured on this meeting from the outset, when he says "Hello, Hob," which on my watch struck me, apparently, as extremely bizarre and of having a real air of Hob being In Trouble. (The only other times Dream says his name are at the first, looming and omniscient, and in 1789, - 'I suggest you find yourself a different line of business, Robert Gadling'. He does not say it at their modern meeting.)

I mean - how would you impress someone? Someone who was interested in your deeds? Putting on a nice little dinner and catching them up on your life, talking about your family, seems a decent enough shout. It's not like you can ask him about his life, he won't offer information when asked and only sometimes will correct you if you venture your own guesses. (see also: 1889 foreshadowing) Hob is feeling proud and triumphant, feeling like he's come far. He is obviously a bit obnoxious about it, but I do think Dream shows off his flaws far more in 1589 than Hob does.

Hob's greatest sin, here, is trying to be liked. His greatest regret is almost certainly not the spread he put on, but the moment he was really, truly, earnest - not underscored even by a subsequent joke - the moment he declaims that this is what he had imagined Heaven to be like (safe enough to walk the streets; good food; good wine) - Life is so rich, he says - and Dream looks away to listen to Will Shaxberd, and we watch real time as Hob's expression collapses. He had leaned forward nearly out of his chair in enthusiasm, and now he shrinks back, reminded again of the dangers of earnestness: being alone in it. Being ignored. Better to make a joke of things, which is why he tells so many around Dream, especially after being more open - it's clearly a matter of habit. (It is also, incidentally, absolutely unappealing to Dream, who really and truly looks at him for the first time in 1689, when he is stripped of the social niceties of men and reigns nothing in.) He eats. He frets. He has had another century, and he has failed to impress the stranger.

The worst moment, I think, is that Dream does not renew their compact. He does not ask Hob if he still wishes to live, and Hob does not get the opportunity to say "Oh, yes." He was given this gift for one reason: the stranger was curious about his experiences. Does the stranger seem still curious about him now? I wonder, honestly, if Hob thought he would see another meeting.

Has he really left that all behind by 1889? No - you hear it in his own words, 'People are almost always better than you think they are.' - the earnesty, and then the joke - 'Not me, though, still the same as ever.' Except it's not really a joke, is it? Hob is saying to Dream, I know you don't think much of me, well, I don't pretend to think much of myself. He still wants Dream's validation, of course, he's just trying to earn it differently. (It goes poorly.) He's smoother, but also more frustrated, more fed up, more hungry for knowledge of his stranger; and I think that's such an interesting point in time for him. I think he leaves little behind, and what he does leave behind, he dreams of. He's changed so much and so little, and I think you could really go in whatever direction you want depicting that and be convincing.

I can't speak to the fanon on Hob's flaws because I don't read nearly as much as I wish I could. While I don't personally think 1589 Hob was actually that questionable or offputting - at least no more than most people would be in that situation - I would love to see a modern fic where has the same flaws he's always had, where they come up maybe different than they would have several centuries ago, but they absolutely exist, it does have plot consequences. Bonus points if he is not being offputting for the purposes of rescuing Dream from the fishbowl - if his flaws exist independent of his relationship with Dream altogether. Bonus bonus points if Hob is the one whose character development needs to be developed and Dream is in a better place than he is. If anyone has fic recs feel free to drop them in the comments!

P.S. 1589 Dream, wow, yes, for sure. 10/10 would babble and get walked out on

#the sandman #dreamling #century meetings #meta #dream of the endless #hob gadling #the amount of them just not understanding what the other person wants or is offering at first is incredible #1489 #1589 #an essay #i really do think the dynamics in the first few meetings are SO INTERESTING and precarious

466 notes · View notes

rollinouttahere-writes · 5 months

Note

Can we get some stuff recharging adult Lucky and Kaku? … asking for a friend.

anon I am gently kissing you on the forehead, thank you so much I have been wanting to talk about them since finishing Enies Lobby

under the cut because I am mentally ill about this man

When they meet, it's in the kitchen of the Going Merry when he comes to check out the ship. Lucky was already a little rattled from the Franky Family trying to jump them, so a strange man suddenly appearing on the ship definitely scares her a bit.

That, and the whole Enel situation happened like not even a week ago.

She freezes and stares at him when he walks in, and he isn't doing any better. He just came to do an evaluation on a ship and now he's finding this poor, battered woman cowering in one of the rooms.

He snaps out of it and is quick to explain who he is and why he's there. Once she's calmed down and realized she isn't about to be attacked again, he steps closer and asks in a hushed tone if she needs help. Rescuing people being held hostage on a pirate ship is hardly a first for Galley-La.

Her attempts to convince him that she is actually fine aren't particularly successful, but he doesn't force her to come with. He does talk her into showing him around the ship "just in case he misses something", but really he's just worried Zoro is going to do something to Lucky when he isn't looking.

Just as he's leaving, he slips a piece of paper into her pocket. It's hastily jotted down directions to Dock 1 if she changes her mind. Lucky is somewhat charmed. While his concern was ultimately unnecessary, it was very sweet of him.

Kaku, meanwhile, is having a crisis. Being able to shut down and disregard emotions is something he had to get good at in his line of work, so why could he not get Lucky out of his head? Why does he feel like he needs to go back and save her? He puts it aside, but just barely.

It keeps building as the arc progresses and further encounters make him feel even more hot under the collar. He went out of his way to bring her some lunch while also covertly doing CP9 stuff because she mentioned wishing she could've tried this one particular food Water 7 was known for. He's down bad and has no idea what to do.

Ultimately, he leaves her behind when their cover is blown and they all head to Enies Lobby, but when she comes there... His resolve breaks. Clearly this is meant to be, why else would she have come here despite the danger? She was meant to be his. She wants this as bad as he does.

After being defeated by Zoro, he uses the last of his strength to find and bring her with him. He's 100% ready to leave everything behind just to be with her. This doesn't work out thanks to Lucky having an impact dial on her, but even after taking such a vicious blow, he's still attempting to reach out to her.

Kaku hates who and what he is. He never asked to be an assassin, none of them did, but he could never fully settle into the roll. A part of him always resented the people who did this to him. Who forced him to live such a horrible life when he could have been normal if they'd laid eyes on anyone but him.

Lucky is his second chance. She's an opportunity to run away and restart his disaster of a life. To experience the normalcy he had up until now thought would only ever be a fantasy.

All he wants is to walk away from all this and be a normal, happy couple living a refreshingly mundane life. Sure, it wouldn't be completely normal, they would have to move around constantly to evade detection from the world government that would absolutely be looking for him, but it's nothing they can't persevere through together.

The thing he wants most is a family. The memories of his own family from his childhood are so far away and unclear that he isn't even entirely sure they're real or just something he came up with to make himself feel better. But now, with Lucky, he could have something indisputably real. Their children would be as adorable as they would be loved, that's what he tells her when he's trying to force convince her to come with him.

Kaku is delusional to an extreme. He only ever sees Lucky as a victim of circumstance that is so traumatized from her past that she can't be trusted to make good decisions for herself. That's why she needs a little push, he tells himself.

Please ask me more about him, I'm obsessed as you can probably tell.

#lucky break #kaku one piece #can you tell who my favorite cp9 member is?

52 notes · View notes

saintsenara · 9 days

Note

Thoughts on Sirius/Harry and Regulus/Harry?

thank you very much for the ask, anon!

sirius black/harry potter

i've never really vibed with sirry. this is not, i think, because of the aspects of it which are transgressive and/or taboo [i think these can be interesting for authors to explore and, even if i didn't, i am neither a cop nor a priest], but because it often seems to focus on things which aren't what i'd consider interesting to examine within the premise.

i never like the idea - influenced by the films - that sirius struggles with separating harry from james, and that any relationship between them would feature sirius acting out his unrequited love for his best friend, repressing his grief by thinking of james as still living, or trying to relive his youthful relationship with james through harry.

i do think sirius would be uncomplicatedly horrified to find himself attracted to harry - whether or not that attraction was reciprocated, and for him to regard it as a major betrayal of the paternal relationship james wanted them to have when he made sirius his son's godfather.

but does this mean he'd never give into temptation? no.

but i think that one aspect of sirius and harry's canon relationship which would really come into play - but which is often overlooked even when writing them platonically - is that there is a reversal of this parent-child dynamic in order of the phoenix, as sirius finds himself lacking the emotional capacity to look after harry because he's trapped and depressed and regressing while stuck in his childhood home and harry takes on the adult role in their dynamic, going out of his way to protect sirius, not wanting to burden him with his problems, and not expecting him to offer him the emotional guidance a child should expect from a parent.

this would enable - in a sexual and/or romantic relationship between them - a really quite interesting power balance, in which sirius would have the power inherent in him being the older of the two [although, obviously he doesn't actually have much more life experience than harry] and the person who is most obviously transgressing the boundaries which are supposed to exist between them [because he's harry's legal guardian and because, as the adult, he's supposed to reiterate that boundary if harry attempt to cross it], but harry would feel a responsibility for sirius' welfare which made those boundaries feel less tangible to him.

i think you can do some really thorny stuff with that.

regulus black/harry potter

harry canonically suggests he thinks regulus is mid - and nobody wants to date a man who's constantly thinking about how they're less attractive that their own brother.

#asks answered #asenora's opinions on ships #sirry #sirius black #harry potter #unhinged and deranged ships

25 notes · View notes

kanmom51 · 8 months

Note

I think I had wishful thinking with how this whole Jk thing would be handled. It’s showing me that a lot of ARMY still forget that our boys are human. I understand having strong feelings towards certain habits due to a multitude of reasons but seeing people question his character is wild to me. Yoongi talked in his documentary about this very thing. Things being blown out of proportion that genuinely in the scheme of things don’t need to be. Our boys have shown us they drink heavily, something that is also harmful but it seems that doesn’t get as much hate as smoking. They are grown men who will do and have habits that aren’t great but as of what we know don’t change who they are. Jk is still our goofy silly guy that we love. I’ll get personal for a second I’m also a singer and used to be a heavy smoker of 🌱, I stopped eventually because I knew long run it wouldn’t be great for my voice but so many singers do it. Now what he seems to be smoking is obviously not healthy but he chooses to do it cuz he likes it and wants to. Of course we want them to be healthy and take care of themselves but again they are grown. I really feel for K-pop idols because it seems there is no way to win. The idol system in a sense sets them up to “fail”. More people upset with him smoking then him being filmed without his permission. Western pop stars are out here doing some wild stuff and no one holds it against them. I feel for them really I do. Again I get that it can be hard for people if they have their own experience with smoking. I shouldn’t be as surprised as I am with the reaction I guess but after how he has been so open on his Weverse lives about being an adult and living his life the way he wants, who are we to say no you can’t do that because we don’t like it.

I agree!!!

Anything else I have to add? I really don't know, cause you kind of said it all @leearmy.

Do I love he's smoking? Hell no. Like I wouldn't love for one of my girls to. It's bad for your health. It's not great for his voice. I lost my mom to lung cancer so it's a little of a sore spot for me.

But at the end of the day, he's a grown up and it's his decision, his life to live.

So, not loving it, but no judging going on. These are my demons to deal with, nothing to do with JK or his choices.

I do have to say that I don't love the glorification of it either. JK is sexy. Period. No need for a cigarette in his mouth to make him that.

I just wish people would accept this is something he does and move on without the ugly or sexy talk going on.

Either way, this is still JK. Smoking or not smoking doesn't make him a good or bad person. It's a lifestyle choice he's making. Nothing illegal going on. Nothing hurtful to others. And as such it's in the "people need to mind their own business" category.

This is most definitley being blown out of proportion. As if we have any say about their private lives in any way shape or form (we most definitely don't).

Like you said, it's still JK, the sweet kind goofie young man that we love.

Plain and simple.

#Jungkook #jk #ask

108 notes · View notes

lover-of-mine · 23 days

Note

I fully agree that it was a lot to have buck hurt eddie like that. Like I get why they did it cause let's be real if eddie had been able to walk it wouldn't have been Tommy at buck's door but I wish they'd go about it in another way...

On another note, do you think buck will analyse his whole relationship with his family and friends with his new found discovery (I still can't believe we have bi buck still feeling shaky omg) and also im sure you've gotten something similar asked but I kinda would like a reassurance well as close to one as I can get, but do you think that means we are headed toward buddie? Or will they be like hey at least you get this kinda thing?

Thank you for your posts they've been great and like I feel we all lived through this together and I'm thankfull for your takes :)

This is actually the first time I thought about them hurting Eddie as a plot device to stop him from reaching out occurred to me. I see it, I don't like it, but I see it.

Okay, yeah, I kinda think he will, finding out you're bisexual as an adult, specially when Buck did as well with women as he does, will be some cause for panic (I say this as someone who was good with men and only found out she was bi as an adult) about particular reactions of people around him (kinda terrified what this means for him with his parents about to come into town) because even if you know some of the people who love you will be supportive, is still a scary experience, even more if you've been trying to find this one thing about yourself for decades, so, yeah, I do believe he will be forced to reevaluate a lot of stuff in his life, and Tim and Oliver seem to be ready to try and tell this story right and I am super interested to see how this will go (I can't believe Bi Buck is real, it literally rewired my brain, I might be losing my mind because I need to sleep because I've been up for who knows how long because every time I try to sleep my brain goes BUCK IS BI and then I start freaking out about again)

I know a lot of you come to me for the logical side of it all to get some reassurance and I love that I can be this person, really, especially in moments like this, so, I love that you came here 🫶. But the buddie of it all, I don't see why they would make Buck queer and not go there with Buck and Eddie. I maintain what I've been saying, that the loft scene is gonna tell us if they are turning up the heat or if we are keeping the energy we had so far while Buck explores his own feelings about being bisexual, even more if we are gonna get 2 for 2 and they are planning on making Eddie demi (god imagine if they actually put a character like Eddie in the ace spectrum, I would die), because then you can use a Buck who's settled into being bisexual to drag the realization from Eddie, because this can cascade into Buck realizing what he's looking for is what he has with Eddie, and since men are an option now, he could look at their relationship and be like "oh so I needed to figure out that I like men, for me to realize that the love I want is with this man" and then trying to figure out if Eddie could feel the same about him, and Eddie having his own queer arc about how no one has felt as right as Shannon because he needs a deeper connection that he does have with Buck and them going there. Buck being bi puts at least halfway there on the road to canon buddie, because now it is an actual canon possibility that Buck will develop, or find out he already has feelings for Eddie. Especially with how intertwined with the discovery with Tommy, Eddie is. Everything that points to Tommy, points to Eddie if Buck just looks to the right, yk? Obviously the showrunners and actors will keep saying there's no plan, and they are seeing where it's going, but if they handle the next episode well, just sit back and enjoy, because they're cooking. They could've made Buck bi be only about Tommy, but they didn't, they made a very intense point of adding Eddie to the mix so I will continue to believe they have a plan and this is a slow burn that's gonna happen, because I honestly, even more now with canon confirmation that Buck is bi, I think it's the only way to look at them, yk? I don't see why they wouldn't go there now that they are not hiding behind the "they are both straight" excuse. And personally, as a writer, I think it would be a waste of a setup not to go there now that we know they can go there.

#im sorry its hard to be coherent rn #my brain is legit fuzzy kapakpkapakaoaa #i hope this js reassuring enough #911 #911 spoilers #i really need a tag for asks #anon 😌

17 notes · View notes

fan-mans · 2 months

Note

So. u said you've got plenty of hcs for our man aran.

and like. mind listing some of those? to accompany narcis ones & stuff? ty!! 👀👀

- erporo

(first hc post here)

Ah ha ha ha ha @erporo

YOU FOOL

you've unleashed a complete monster!!!

*explodes and drops 4 pages of these where my body once was*

Okay so I'm gonna start with the long, convoluted backstory I gave him plus random life things tee hee

(For the purposes of this story, Aran's gonna use he/him throughout)

He was a bit of a surprise because he was born a bit earlier than expected. His parents were working out of town, on the island of Inis Mór (The largest of the Aran islands) and he ended up being born in some lady's garden on the 7th of April at 4 pm weighing exactly 8 pounds. (Take note of this, it will be important)

After taking him to a hospital, he was cleared for any problems, but as they left, his parents noticed that his birth certificate was messed up and went to get a new one from a hospital in their own county (This detail will be very important later)

Aran grows up on a sheep and goat farm in Donegal with his family. Irish ends up being his first language and he's stubborn on learning English. He learns to dance (Particularly Sean-nós) and play traditional instruments and grows a knack for painting, sculpting and drawing too.

His childhood is pretty normal for a poor farm kid living in a small village of only a few hundred people. He learns a lot about caring for animals and gets a lot of skill around farrier work (Taking care of horse hooves and making/fitting horseshoes). He also grows quite superstitious due to how much his grandmother teaches him and insists that the odd prevalence of 4 and 7 in his life are no mere coincidence.

He gets bullied in school and definitely ostracized by others but he pushes through as normal until he's 14. Only a month into his first year of high school, his grandfather dies out on the field and much of the flock and savings are stolen. His mother also gets seriously sick after having his youngest siblings and can't work for months due to poor care from a nurse.

So, as excited as he was to be in high school, Aran drops out and takes care of his siblings in his mother's place, willing to lose his education for the sake of theirs. During this time, he also gets extra money running errands and babysitting for locals.

During one babysitting gig, a woman who certainly doesn't live in town drops off quite a load of cash and her baby before leaving. She does not return until a year later to drop off another baby. Of course the Ryans are infuriated and end up adopting the boys as their 10th and 11th children respectively.

Aran becomes an extra parent to his siblings as his mother recovers, spending whatever free time he has either helping out or doing odd jobs to keep everyone alive. When his mom is okay again, and their lost flock found, it's been two years and a now 16 year old Aran can't return to school to any reasonable degree. He still has his odd jobs, but he now finds himself with a lot more free time. He ends up honing his art skills and starting a fight club with a gaggle of other kids to relieve stress.

This fight club stumbles into a bit of luck, when a crew of athletes end up stopping into the local pub and causing a scene. Aran and his friends end up using their skills, in part taken from collar and elbow wrestling, and get a handle on the adults and kick them out. Aran is particularly ferocious and his energy catches the attention of the men's manager.

Said manager returns a little while later and hunts all of the kids in the fight down and personally invites them to step into boxing. Aran proves himself as a capable fighter to the manager, taking on a low ranking adult and easily beating him. From there Aran is brought into the boxing world and brings in a healthy amount of money to his family

Of course, all this traveling leads him to coming across a load of interesting people, particularly trans people, and leads him to realize he's a trans man. His family is confused and unsupportive and an extremely angry and stifled Aran, already stressed from his abusive girlfriend, decides to run away at 19.

He ends up hitchhiking his way to Dublin, but there's one problem- he doesn't have a birth certificate

Unfortunately, all those years ago, his parents never got a new one, despite many years of trying and that left poor Aran in legal limbo. 'Luckily' for him, he gets a break when, in return for boxing for a shady group, he's offered a litany of fake documents and get on his way to a career and transitioning.

For 3 years, this is Aran's life, boxing with a fake id and a fake life, transitioning, and paying half his salary to this group. He's comfortable, but he's sad. He misses his family and is growing to hate his employers. So he phones home.

His eldest sister picks up and almost screams when she realizes who it is. They talk about what's happened since he left an make plans to break it to their parents and grandma gently with the rest of their sibling's help.

When Aran calls the second time, he gets to have a long conversation with his mom, dad, and grandma- a lot of apologies pass around, everyone cries at least three times, and they're all happy that he's still okay. His parents and grandma finally accept him and offer to bring him home. But there's still the problem of the shady gang that got him his faked documents.

After a bit of planning, Aran heads home, with the leader of the gang in tow, promising a grand gift for all the help he's given Aran.

This is a trap.

Aran leads him into the local pub, where the gang leader is threatened by about a hundred odd people with various weapons. The leader surrenders, accepts some money to keep quiet and not bother Aran anymore and leaves.

Aran, now back home, continues his career, doing fights across nearby towns and occasionally dipping into Galway or Dublin for big fights, giving his money to his family.

From here the WVBA takes quick notice of him. They offer him a job in New York and, seeing the paycheck and line of work, Aran can't bring himself to refuse. So he goes, his documents still fake, and gets the job without a hitch. Of course, he also starts cheating, knowing the ranks of the wvba are filled with cheaters galore, going as far as to steal form the nypd's horses for his weapons.

All this goes fine until one day he slips up in front of his manager, stating his real age instead of the one listed on all of his documents. He backtracks and then resorts to pleading, terrified he's gonna be kicked out of the country but Mr dream is a good guy and not only allows him to stay, but petitions for him to get corrected stuff specifically so he can stay.

^ (this excludes some details but is the main deal)

His entire life revolves around the numbers 7 and 4 (Among other luck symbols). From the moment he was born they were big factors in his life. No one in his family is quite sure why he specifically has such 'luck' but they all have their theories-

His siblings think half of it is a strange, if cool, coincidence while the other is of his own subconscious doing (Such as owning/making/doing things in sets of 4 or 7 exactly)

Mam and da think it's a little supernatural, maybe a little gift of luck from god

His gran is special: she's sure it's the work of faeries and told him as much growing up. Grandad didn't have as strong belief as her but also encouraged said thinking. He liked letting his first grandchild feel special and learn to love the magic in the mundane. Gran firmly believes it's a gift and a blessing that he should appreciate- it's not often that faeries bless humans after all

But not everyone in his family thinks of it so well… While his da's family is more cool headed about all of it, his ma's (Or rather his ma's sister and mother) are very uncool about it

They're kinda fanatic and the type of people who look at shit like Wizard 101 and claim its the work of Satan.

Although his maternal grandma wasn't allowed to see him because of such behavior, his aunt was. The first thing she did when she heard her mother-in-law's theory that he was blessed by faeries, she put little Aran in a box with a bit of iron and left him in a nearby field to die. (Great lady, I know.)

Luckily Aran was found quickly (Exactly 12 minutes later) and his aunt was banned from the house. Aran's aunt and maternal grandma still act as if he's the devil to this day.

His mental health (And generally the mental health of his family) is... so bad. They're the types who are very used to it so they never question things like obvious signs of adhd or autism because it's so normal to them.

Aran himself is really hard to diagnose not only cause he's very wary abt doctors, but because his symptoms are very volatile and all over the place.

Pinning them down under one diagnosis is really hard cause like he's got obsessions/compulsions like he has ocd (Mostly around superstition, luck and 'bad luck')

A phobia of the number 13 and similar symbols of bad luck

Has nightmares and definitely panic attacks around causing himself bad luck and traumatic events in his life He's had bouts of paranoia

And when he's paranoid he also tends to develop delusions and occasionally hallucinate as well (Mostly these come on top of things triggering him or if he hasn't taken good care of himself)

All this on top of adhd and autism

He does get help eventually tho.

As an adult, he has nightmares when left to sleep alone, which is actually from a traumatizing incident where a guy just tried to kidnap him when he was little

Now for other random things:

Very bitter and untrustworthy towards all people because he's been very ostracized by the world, but rich people get the worst of his anger (esp if they're British). This is a HUGE character flaw of his that, with a lot of time and effort he learns to let go of and stop being a shithead.

He can get very defensive and aggressive towards people as a safety mechanism for himself

He gets quite heated in debates, esp politics and history, and has punched people more than once

While aran has a serious sailor's mouth, he actually scolds kids when they swear- big brother instinct

His twin siblings have a similar bit of 'luck' with the number 2- though not to the extent he has

Because of his falsified documents, the age listed on his profile and his weight are both wrong (The wvba in general is shit at keeping proper track of this shit). In reality, he's 200 lbs and 28.

He does not trust doctors at all- he isn't an antivaxxer or anything, but he'd never willingly enter a hospital

Aran likes the smell of irish spring a lot so he wears it

He also likes lucky charms- first ironically but then the marshmallows got to him

He uses 'poggers' as a covert/cutesy nickname for kisses (cause pog in irish means kiss)

Aran would live in a very cluttered, run down apartment, full of knicknacks and posters and covered in his dirty laundry and dog toys

Aran either smells like potatoes beer and fresh cut grass, a sweaty sewer, or peat metal and a nice hint of vanilla- really depends on the day

Believes in zodiac stuff because of his superstition

Aran can fall asleep to pretty much any song sung by a woman with a deep voice (Ex: fast car by tracy chapman) because it reminds him of his mom's singing :)

He has a bit of a nicotine habit, but curbs the effects of cigs when he really needs one by sharing it with someone else

Aran sees the entire world circuit and eventually everyone in branch a as some sort of family

Aran sometimes forgets to eat/doesn't have the energy to cook every so often- so he just makes a big bowl of instant mashed potatoes and eats it in one sitting

Aran named his flail Macha, after an irish goddess of war and death and horses. He loves it to death and treats it as a good luck charm!

He likes horses and goats a lot- they're some of his favorite animals

He's also a not-so-secret fan of cheeseburgers, it's his favorite food lmao

has read homestuck and stans gamzee

Aran has a flip phone for a long time cause in his house the wall phone was the most recent piece of tech they had- so handheld stuff scared him

he still types like an old man

During the off season, he becomes p unrecognizable- letting hair (esp beard) grow out and packing on pounds. He honestly looks indistinguishable from his dad

One of his favorite bands is the dropkick murphys

He doesn't mid bras but he hates underwire and thinks it's evil

He's either a funny drunk or a broody drunk, depending on who he's with

Aran LOVES his beer- he's a bit of a snob about it actually

He's also big on coffee

If you don't think this man wouldn't jump at the chance to roll down a hill and play in a meadow, you're wrong

if he gets the chance to, he'll always make a flower crown

All his siblings have 'm' names except the youngest two, he did as well before he changed it, but he still responds to various nicknames related to his old name

Because of his phobia of the number 13- he used to be scared of sandman

Although he's superstitious around them, he doesn't hate black animals or even think of hurting them like some other people. Instead he'll 'fix' his luck by seeking out a white animal of the same type (Black cat cross his path? Seek out a white cat to pet to fix the luck)

He has a few paces of iron jewelry he takes with him everywhere... just to be safe

he's been arrested more times than he can count- mostly for small things like vandalizing, petty theft, fighting a cop, etc.

One of his favorite stims is tapping his head- it helps him focus

Aran sometimes forgets things he just said, or straight up doesn't register words coming out of his mouth- that 'pretty like my sister' comment was just random word jumble and didn't mean anything

#aran ryan #punch out #punch out wii #headcanons #I love doing these #sorry for the late response- school and sickness took me out lmao #that's right #4 pages wooo!!!#I'm batshit about this guy!!!!#my hcs

18 notes · View notes

maelstroem-of-love · 10 months

Text

Do you ever think about Bobby Twist?

This kid whose father never wanted him and we don't know whether his mother did either. A kid trying to get his father's approval and being ignored. Just a kid, feeling that his father yearns for something different, a life which Bobby is not part of, one where Bobby doesn't even exist. And even though he does not fully understand it, it hurts him.

Once in a while, maybe a couple times a year, Bobby sees Jack drive off to some far away place to go fish. He knows that Jack is the happiest right as he's about to leave, and the saddest when he returns. Does he ever think that he is the problem? Does he cry because he thinks the reason daddy is unhappy is because he hates him and wants to get rid of him?

Bobby is a teenager when Jack Twist dies. I imagine him crying at the funeral - not because he misses Jack, but because he is ashamed of himself. His father is dead, and yet he feels nothing. God, he's a monster, isn't he? It's a closed casket funeral - Jack's head is busted. Bobby tries to imagine his face. He doesn't even know what color his eyes were.

I imagine him becoming a well-off young man. He starts to spend time with the adults. They talk a lot about Jack, they say Bobby's his “splitting image”, they tell him stories about Jack that he's never heard before, and Bobby realises what he has been suspecting for a long time - he didn't know his father at all. And then, when Bobby (or now probably Robert), feels lonely, he tries to connect with Jack Twist, even though he's only a ghost in people's memories. He learns that Jack's soul is more elusive than it seems - it looks like he had affairs, but...he didn't? And what was he really doing on all those “fishing trips” that were so important to him?

What if Robert found postcards among his dad's stuff? Dozens of them, all from different adresses but from the same man: Ennis del Mar. He would've realized that man had the answer to the riddle that was Jack Twist.

I imagine him tracking down Ennis, now an old and lonely man, living alone in his trailer. I also imagine Ennis nearly having a heart attack upon seeing him, because it looks to him like Jack is risen from the dead. Robert would ask about his father and Ennis would tell as best he could, but it would still seem like a piece of the puzzle is missing.

Maybe Robert would drive back home and forget about that old man. Maybe he would never learn what he wanted.

But I like to think that he would know from the twinkle in Ennis' eyes when he speaks of Jack, from the way he looks at Robert as if he were an angel, from how he seems at loss for words when describing what they did on those trips many years ago - he would know. And he would cry because he just met the only person in the world who both knew and loved his father.

Ennis would freak the hell out, but Robert would promise to never tell anyone, and say that he's actually relieved to know Jack's secret...wasn't that horrible.

I hope he'd keep visiting Ennis after that. I hope they'd get past the awkwardness, and that Ennis would get to know Robert as his own man rather than just an extension of his father. Then, maybe Ennis could finally have something similar to that son he always wanted, and a little piece of Jack - not the same thing, not at all, but enough to be worth living for.

Then, maybe Bobby could have the father he always deserved.

#brokeback mountain #jus thinkin bout bobby

43 notes · View notes

lithuanianking · 3 months

Note

What do you think about the bits of characterization implying that Seymour thinks Audrey likes abusive guys (the leather jacket scene/"Gee I'd like a harley machine, toolin' around like I was James Dean, makin' all the guys on the corner turn green!"/her choosing Twoey over him in his nightmare in the extended movie version of The Meek Shall Inherit), this stuff drives me insane and I don't ever see anyone talk about it but I think it's really interesting and can be tied into things like his insecurity about his masculinity and the reality of her 50s housewife dream actually being very messed up and conductive to abuse unknown to her and yeah why do I never see anyone talk about this it's so (strange and) interesting

I have never heard this concept before omg.

Seymour definitely tries to "mirror" orin in the sense that he at least wants to look like him.

Audery actually kinda admits to him that she keeps ending up with abusive guys "I'd meet a man and I follow him blindly,he'd snap his fingers,me I'd say sure." Also with in the movie how she excuses orin by saying he makes good money and that he's a Professional.

So I don't know if I agree with Seymour thinks she particularly goes affter abusive guys but I don't disagree either.

But I'm gonna have to flat out respectfully disagree with you about her wanting to be a house wife being messed up.

The second wave of feminism took place in the 1960s which was did critique the idea of women having to belong in the kitchen. But just because a woman wants to be a housewife does that mean she has internalize misogyny?

Let's break down her song somewhere that's green.

"I know Seymour's the greatest

But I'm dating a semi-sadist

So I've got a black eye

And my arm's in a cast."

It's pretty clear what she's saying here,Seymour is the ideal guy for her but she can't really leave orin.

"Still, that Seymour's a cutie

Well, if not, he's got inner beauty

And I dream of a place

Where we could be together at last"

Being a house wife isn't audery trying to confine to social standards it's a place for her and Seymour to get away from there hard lives.

"He rakes and trims the grass

He loves to mow and weed"

Here she talks about how Seymour would Also be doing his fair share,even though it is the more "masculine" chore. But she likes the idea of having a husband who'd just like to do chores and be a good father.

It suddenly Seymour she mentions being raised by a single mother so she probably wants a "normal" adult life and wants to raise children with 2 parents.

Also yes Seymour is definitely concerned about his masculinity. He is a very nerdy guy and allways portrayed as the weak guy.

To get a little off topic but in the cartoon i mentioned there a episode that he's I'm home ec and he gets bullied by paine and his friends for not being manly enough.

He probably feels almost pressured by orin who is this overly masculine guy (which is to compensate for the fact he is a closed gay man but that's not what this posts about) and might think audery won't like a little shrimp like him.

He's also constantly getting picked on and pushed around and mostly by his own creation. I myself do struggle with some toxic masculinity and can sympathize with Seymour being more feminine by the people around him.

So audery "choosing " orin over him 100% makes him feel not manly enough.

Thanks so much for this ask it was great to think of something I've never took into account !

#seymour lsoh #lsoh twoey #orin lsoh #orin scrivello #seymour krelborn #suddenly seymour #little shop of horrors audery #little shop of horrors

16 notes · View notes

shortpplfedup · 1 year

Text

Ah yes, the messiness of teenagers just trying to navigate life, this is the good stuff I wanted to see. The theme this week is 'love' and we see Neung, Palm, Ben, Chopper and Maggie all taking tentative-to-bold steps toward the objects of their respective affections, with varying levels of success. Not an adult to be seen this week, it's all emotions and flirting and yearning and longing and kissing and jealousy, a delicious feelings stew. We're moving out of act 1 into act 2 of the story now. All the characters and the conflicts are established, and all the unknowns are obvious.

Neung and Ben are kissing and flirting, but Palm is still the one Neung's thinking of sitting in the bath. I can see that Neung is trying to 'love the one you're with', because as much as he can't stop thinking about Palm, he's pretty sure he can't have him. Ben is someone he can have, someone who will treat him like a living, breathing human with needs and desires and foibles and not a doll to be kept in a glass case on a shelf for fear it breaks. Ben is possible. Ben is simple. And yet...Palm's glances and touches linger a bit too long, Palm leans in to talk a bit too close, Palm goes cold with him after he kisses Ben. But Palm won't say it, won't ask for it, and Neung doesn't know how to get past that wall...

...because how does he compete with this? Maggie is bright and pretty and nice and determined and most importantly she's a girl, and if that's what Palm likes there's no point letting his heart get entangled.

Palm however...

Well let's just say this isn't the face of a man who is interested in what's on offer. 'Maggie's nice to me so I'm nice to her' he tells Neung, thinking that he's politely and clearly saying he's not interested in her. But to Neung that's as clear as mud. Because Maggie gets Palm's smiles and attention and all he gets is Khun Neung khrap. Palm both wants and doesn't want Neung to see how he feels about him. Sometimes he can't help himself, so a lingering touch of his hand, a stolen glance at his lips...he'll allow himself that much and no more. He doesn't even allow himself jealousy, as much as he is burning with it when he sees Ben kiss Neung. 'I don't have a right to be mad at you' he tells him, and there are so many LAYERS to that statement.

But Neung is sure as shit mad with Palm, and fuelled with enough liquid courage, he decides it's time to let him know it. Neung's little drunken tirade was UGLY, it was cruel, it was demeaning, and it was designed to hit every single sore spot Palm possesses. Neung wanted to make Palm lose it, to make him show that Neung affects him like he affects Neung. The more Palm tried to calm things, the more he refused to fight back, the meaner and crueler the things coming out of Neung's mouth. Because he might have Ben, but Palm is who he truly wants, and he doesn't know how to bridge the divide between them, so he chooses violence.

On an opposite corner of the pentagon, I wish I could make GIF's because watching Chopper's heart break in real time was a masterstroke of subtle acting by Perth. You can pinpoint the exact moment it sinks in that Ben likes his cousin, and what that means for his own feelings for Ben. You get the sense that Chopper is painfully aware of having missed his own chance to confess. His entreaty to Ben to express himself before it's too late is tinged with regret, with an understanding of what it means to let someone you love slip away because you're scared to say it. And there is a moment where it's pretty clear that Ben understands exactly what Chopper is saying and why he's saying it to him.

In the end, Ben takes Chopper's advice, and that's why he's the only one who gets what he wants. Closed mouths don't get fed, and Ben was the only person in this mess of a love pentagon to open his and say what he felt. I still don't know what to make of Ben, he still feels very much like he's hiding things, but from the preview that may be because he has an overbearing and homophobic dad, and no more nefarious reason. All in all, I'm loving the way this triangle (pentagon) is being written and acted by all involved, and I'm ready to see what the hell happens next.

Stray Bullets

I feel like Palm's 2 week suspension was completely brushed past, I might have liked a montage or something there to underline the passage of time.

Phum is not going to take what happened lying down, and the fact that he didn't show up once after the beginning of the ep has me anxious.

Chanon not going to the school wasn't surprising, but the lack of adults in this ep means we don't even know if he's aware of what happened. I assume he noticed that Palm isn't with Neung on the school run, but it feels like Chanon would be the type to berate Palm about embarrassing him and being ungrateful to Thanya. It feels like something is missing.

Neung's little loom over Ben at the dance party was kinda hot, NGL.

This doesn't feel like an act break so much as an act shift, but the story feels like it's about to move into a different gear somehow.

#never let me go #never let me go the series #junior mafia #bl meta series

88 notes · View notes