#he's so fucking done lmao i've never seen anyone do the 'so done' thing better than him
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#he's so fucking done lmao i've never seen anyone do the 'so done' thing better than him#arsenic and old lace#cary grant
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Arcane Men + Morning Wood
Pairing: Viktor, Jayce, Silco, Vander, Ekko, Marcus, Finn x Fem!Reader
Tags: nsfw, smut, morning wood, awkward boners, grinding, blowjob, naked cuddling, handjob, cold showers, teasing, coming in pants, dirty talk, praise, degradation
A/N: Don't you just hate it when this awkward problem happens and there's no one to help you? Well these men don't lmao.
Viktor grinds on you quite often so it's not surprising that he'd get a boner early in the morning. Normally it would be taken care of before you even woke up but well, even he can oversleep at times.
He thought he was having a really nice dream when he first opened his eyes and was met with the sight of your hand pumping his cock up and down. He treated it like he would any other wet dream too, until he realized that it was real and was then flustered but past the point of stopping because his cock was already painfully throbbing in your hand.
"Go faster darling, you know how I like it. I never tire of seeing my cock in your hand, feels so much better then my own, softer too. And this early in the morning as well, I'm a very lucky man. I've had this dream many times before now but this time it's... it's not a dream? Oh! I... I do have dreams like this yes, naturally but I never brought it up because... alright, alright, I get it, I'll shut up and enjoy the show."
Jayce likes to sleep with you on top of him so you can imagine the embarrassment when he wakes up with his hard cock poking at you and a stain already forming at the front.
He asks you to forget about it, he'll take care of it, you're gonna be late for work anyway, and there's no time for... and you're already taking his boxers of and licking his cock. His face has an expression of awe, all this time he thought he'd already seen the most beautiful sights in the world, now he has another one to add: looking down at you with your mouth full of his cock, the early morning ray's shining down on you like a halo. Breathtaking.
"Babe... I can explain... well actually I can't. Uhm, it just kinda happens sometimes you know. What am I saying of course you know! Fuck, look forget about it let's just go, we'll be late. You can make it quick? What do you mean by that? Right now? Of course I wanna! How-how quick can you make it?"
Silco usually wakes up early waits until it goes away, there's no reason to wake you up too just because he's a little excited. Very excited but still.
He wasn't gonna deny that he's horny when you did notice it, you already know the effect you have on him. When you offered a blowjob at first he was hesitant because he wanted to return the favor. The moment your lips touched the tip of his cock his arguments faded away, his hand on the back of your head to guide your pace. He was never good at denying you.
"I want to take care of you too darling. Surely you're not saying no to that now, you were screaming last night. You... ah... that is... a good argument. Slower, take it in deeper. Good work. This is why you're my partner. That talented mouth can make anyone do anything you want them too. Of course, you only do this for me, I'll repay you later just you wait."
Vander can hardly keep down his grunts and growls as he tosses the covers off and sees you practically choking on his cock first thing in the morning.
Don't get him wrong he's grateful for that you're taking care of him but he wasn't aware that he was going at you that roughly even in his sleep. He can go slower if you... oh you want it harder? Yeah? Well don't blame him for your sore throat then. He won't neglect you either, as soon as you're done with him he'll push you down on his cock and fuck you, even if he's half hard it doesn't take much for him to be fully erect when you're concirned.
"You should have said something darlin. I'm sorry I didn't notice, I was dreamin you see. It was a wonderful dream. Not as good as the real thing though. I'll always prefer the real thing. You will too? You dirty girl, of course you will. Harder? I can but are you sure? Alright, but you will be sore after. Small price to pay? I love when you get all slutty on me like this."
Ekko is a little bit embarrassed, your relationship still new after all and he doesn't want to give you the impression that sex is all he thinks about when he's with you.
Cuddles are some of his favorite things in the world, especially early in the morning and well, he likes to take all the clothes off for it too. He's hesitant due to him having a hard on, damn did he have nothing to worry about, you're fucking soaked just from the sight of him like that. His cock is hot and throbbing between your pussy lips as you grind against him, urging him to come.
"Not gonna lie to you Firefly, this is a little embarrassing for me. I can go take care of this real fast yeah? No? Heh, wanna give me a hand then? Or maybe more than your hand. Wait... really? Fuck, already so wet, I'm guessing you had some nice dreams too. Let me make them come true."
Marcus usually takes a long cold shower to take care of himself in the morning. He's very good at waking up before you so he can come back into bed and have a few more minutes with you.
He was really surprised when he came back to bed and you were already awake, not only that but also opening your legs for him to come closer. You're gonna have to make it fast, he's still a little cold but you'll warm him right up, his whole body, his heart as well as his cock.
"What are you doing up already sweetheart? Did I leave the door open when I took a shower? I'm sorry I didn't notice. Do you want to cuddle a little before I leave for- you're naked? I just took a shower so I might feel a little cold. You think you can help me warm up again?"
Finn likes to stay inside of you, your pussy keeping his cock warm all night, so you always know when he's got morning wood. His hands always grab hold of your ass and pushes you against him.
The best way for him to start his day is by pounding your cunt open while you milk his cock dry. He'll never get tired of fucking you awake. If that could be what he does all day he wouldn't mind. Sadly he can't so he'll enjoy you whenever he has the time. Or maybe sometimes when is isn't supposed to. But hey, who's gonna stop the two of you from keeping your hands from each other?
"Still sleepy kitten? I can wake you up, you just stay there, I'll take care of you. You take such good care of my cock, I don't want anyone to say I'm not fucking you right back. There's that pretty expression, even this early you look so well fucked. You're getting my cock so wet like a good cockslut."
#arcane#arcane x reader#arcane smut#viktor x reader#jayce x reader#silco x reader#vander x reader#ekko x reader#marcus x reader#finn x reader#viktor#jayce talis#jayce talis x reader#silco#vander#ekko#marcus#finn#league of leguends#league of legends x reader#league of legends smut#arcane headcanon#arcane imagines
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How I think the Redacted listeners are with 💫kids💫
First post I've done like this and I had fun.
°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°
Angel: Has an equal energy, so keeping up with them wouldn't be difficult for them. Actually knowing how to take care of them is why they're thankful Google exists. And Baabe.
Baabe: Needs to put them in a jail corner while they make a list of activities. Makes a call to Asher asking if he can hit Michaels on the way home. Keeps the Clorox wipes and other cleaning spray in a spot they can get to it easily (but not the kids) because children are unsanitary. Secretly prays they're never asked to babysit, but they're capable of doing it and can be very well trusted.
Sweetheart: Not a fan, but is good at entertaining them. They do like playing hide-and-seek with them though.
Darlin': Would not fucking touch them. Would not go near them. But they did lose their shit when they'd see kids play stupid games and win stupid prizes. Nowadays they're a little more open to playin' around with the kids in the pack and "for some reason" the kids always wanna play jungle gym on them. They're a bad influence on some days, and the wise "don't fucking do that stupid thing bc I did that stupid thing and this is what it gave me" one on others.
Lovely: Doesn't spend much time with kids, but they wouldn't be terrible with them. Would they need someone else to supervise them? Perhaps.
Freelancer: Honestly amazing with kids. It's them and Hux who are do the most for them<3
Lasko's listener: They seem like The Mom Friend(gender neutral), so I feel like they'd be great with kids.
Bright Eyes: Dropped one. (Fred caught the child, don't worry-)
Cutie: Could be trusted with kids, would not want to take care of them.
Honey: Not really a kids person. Anyone who knows them wouldn't jump to ask them to babysit unless it was an emergency (and they would do it.)
Smartass: Definitely not a kids person.
Babe/Baby (Ollie's listener): They'd be good with kids.
Sunshine: Pretty good with kids, even better when Eli is there to help out :)
Starlight: Idk about y'all but they don't feel like a kids type of person to me ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ (besides, you can't really babysit if you're stuck in Meridian hell-)
Bestie/Dreamer: ...I don't think I'd want them near any children given the new theories coming out that I absolutely agree with-
Seer Obscura: Not mentally well enough to deal with them💀
Warden: Kids? Ew-
Asset: Better than Warden, but has little experience.
Baby 1.0: Would be okay with kids.
Baby 2.0: Would also be okay with kids.
Precious: Don't trust them with your children. Something might happen💀
Love (Anton's listener): Would be amazing with kids. Have you seen their plants??
°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°
If I missed anyone just scream at me lmao
#redacted audio#redacted asmr#redactedverse#redacted angel#redacted baabe#redacted sweetheart#redacted darlin#redacted lovely#redacted freelancer#redacted lasko's listener#redacted bright eyes#redacted cutie#redacted honey#redacted smartass#redacted babe#redacted sunshine#redacted starlight#redacted bestie#redacted dreamer#redacted seer obscura#redacted warden#redacted asset#redacted baby#redacted baby 2.0#redacted precious#redacted love#redacted listeners
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Ice skating was a fucking disaster today my god. new class session and my friend and I are more or less too skilled for the beginner sections but the lower intermediate sections went straight into backwards crossovers with like zero prep which we cannot do. Because we are genuinely lower intermediate. So we went to our teacher who does the top-most beginner lessons to ask what to do and she was like, look just try it and if it sucks come back to me, idk why they started off so hard anyway, I saw they had some repeat students from last session. And we were like here's the thing, the second intermediate section is actually just straight up freestyle group lessons, so everyone who is in the first intermediate section is basically anyone who can't do jumps and she was like...they do what lmao. my friend was like I've seen them do salchow jumps in that section!! She was uh no one should be doing upper level freestyle in a learn to skate class?? YEAH NO KIDDING
Then we went to get our skates sharpened bc neither of us had done that since April and the guy looked at my skates and he was like hey...whoever sharpened your skates last never deburred your skates... I was like is that bad 😭 and he was like well it's not GOOD. and then I was stuck contemplating how vast the universe, how much I have yet to learn
Anyway it's very interesting to be five months into the second try of a hobby and have passed where I got stuck last time only to now get stuck in an entirely different way. but also to have a much better sense of how I am stuck and what is in my control vs what is out of my control? I beat up on myself a lot for being hobbyless but I do think 5 straight months of ice skating lessons and the sort of gradual accumulation of knowledge over that time both accidental and purposeful should count as a hobby. Idk tonight gave me a lot to think abt.
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Kinda weird question- do you have any links to people talking about Mira from ZTD and ableist stereotypes? I mentioned that I was uncomfortable with her portrayal but kinda fumbled it and made some other ND people in chat uncomfortable. I searched for various keyword combinations but most of what I'm finding is like "and not to mention the ableism with Mira" and doesn't elaborate lol.
Not weird at all! And uh, you see, there's a recent post I made where what I complain about is the very fact I've never seen anyone post too in-depth about her at all, I'd love to see posts that do elaborate on that but I do not have any that I know of right now, sorry :/ hopefully someone else who sees this can point to one? Okay!! After some tag searches I have found exactly one post who kind of gets into it I like this take still would love to see. more than just one but hooray
And like though I complain I couldn't elaborate much on it myself I don't think, I believe most of the posts people make about Saito from aitsf would apply since it's a different uchikoshi take on the very same trope of "emotionless characters who cannot function without killing others" I guess he's a worse portrayal though since she's at least not stated to get reward brain chemicals when killing people and I guess her case also has the added layer of "femme fatale" to it? Which either makes it less bad or worse depending on where you approach it from As I said I am not doing a good job of being coherent on this oh and also there's her being "redeemed" and "cured" in the epilogue which in on itself is kinda not great to imply it just goes away like that and honestly I personally don't even buy it I think she'd just be like oh okay Akane over here has like a thousand reasons to hate me after all that oh and what's that she's the leader of a super wealthy underground organization who's organized one of these death traps before yeah no I'm better off going to prison I'll be fine there lmao bye
But I'll say as an autistic person with relatively low empathy I usually see a character who just doesn't understand other people's feelings and wants to feel them too and is just trying to survive despite getting no help and I just kinda go hm. yeah. shout-out to roxas kingdom hearts shout out to mary from ib shout out that's why I started hyperfixating on media art helps me with understanding others a great lot and Mira is just in a story too badly executed for me to care or even begin to wrap my head around tbh like god she's so fucking terribly used as a plot device in every conceivable way that it makes it difficult to see past it and into what she could possibly be if it weren't for the stereotype of equalling low empathy with no compassion what's with her killing off screen in ways that wildly deviate from her stated m.o? why or how was she even in cahoots with Zero why was that a thing? Honestly her dynamic with Sean could have been better fleshed out could have done something interesting about robot child and his aspd big sis but we just kind of don't get any attention brought to the subject of emotions and the authenticity there of except for the "reveal"...
YOU KNOW WHAT that's probably one huge reason it feels so fucked up actually! Like the whole fucking game is written so you could experience it in whatever order you want and therefore Mira being a serial killer at all is something that though not very well hidden it also cannot be a topic of discussion or explored Ever ever because the player may not have seen the fragment where that is revealed yet- problem being the menu design of that game sucks so bad and practically everyone gravitates towards the same few more interesting looking thumbnails first and then the rest is kinda just there, I mean that is part of the reason A Lot of characters feel half-baked I think but also I think it definitely does impact perception of her character specifically probably The Most and then there's just the general not being given nuance not being able to see the minutiae of how that disorder manifests in her character aside from the killings about how she acts aside from being overly flirty trying to lure in Eric but that affects pretty much all of the new cast we don't have last names and in her case we barely have any backstory at all like Saito is a harmful stereotype sure but we get So Much Context for him that people still love talking about him and delving into different aspects of his life since we have that very well telegraphed in the narrative meanwhile for Mira all we can do is fill in the blanks guesswork that only highlights the worst aspects of the surface level portrayal we got and ultimately that people just don't care enough to dissect because there isn't much there character wise once you remove it
#oh to be miraposting on a sunday evening instead of catching up on schoolwork#I love how you can see the exact moment while writing this that I had a brain blast akdhks#me: sorry I can't elaborate also me: types out. three paragraphs#also if you're comfortable with that I'm curious what you could have possibly said that it'd be considered fumbling#dms are open if you send it into an ask I'll answer privately and again only if you want to share#cause like I want to see different perspectives on this so bad even if they're not eloquent#especially since it's not really something that ever got to me much? but that I can kinda see why it'd be upsetting#my suspension of disbelief is just too tanked for it to get an emotional reaction of me especially with the rest of the cast for contrast#I'm too busy being annoyed at everyone else's portrayal in that game not to mention idk it feels like#like schlocky hollywood no thoughts character archetype go brr type ableism#not the really insidious woven into the narrative stuff that I usually want to rant about cough cough youtube video I'll probably never mak#like pretty sure it's stated somewhere that the idea for her character was uchikoshi going hm. there's been femme fatales in these games#but none of them have been Really “Fatale” you know? he literally just wanted the big booba character to also be the stabby character#zero escape#ztd#mira ztd#if this should be under a readmore. let me know#zero escape spoilers
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lmao ok last review of the season
That was the most mediocre thing I've ever seen. THAT was their finale?? LAST week's episode felt more like a finale than whatever milk toast this was.
And don't come for me with that "oh Hannah you'd be upset if they actually did something too weh weh" crap. YEAH I PROBABLY WOULD BE. Cause every single episode of this entire season has been one of two models:
Lets do Absolutely Nothing
Lets do The Worst Possible Thing But Make It Stupid, Too
So I guess in the grand scheme of things it's better to have gone the do Absolutely Nothing route for the finale. But also what a disappointing end to the most disappointing and shit season yet.
Aight let's talk specifics.
Why the fuck was that so easy to do. Din didn't even have to be there for any of that. They could have sent him a postcard later on like "ay whats up we retook mandalore" and it would have had the same impact. Nothing anyone did mattered because Axe just ended up dropping an entire ship on top of Gideon, negating any actual struggle.
Oh he broke the darksaber, are we going to explore the ramifications of that? Will this affect Bo-Katan who has done nothing but lust after that stupid sword for two entire seasons? Will we finally get some thought about what leadership means? Absolutely not!!!! It means nothing!! Toss it away and never speak of it again!!!!! SURE OK!!!!! GREAT.
We didn't actually physically see Gideon die and and you know how that goes so maybe he'll be back. Can't say I like that the clones he was making were clones of himself, I still think evil little grogus would have been more disturbing and fun.
oh so Paz dying didn't actually matter either, good to know we did that for shits and giggles Only.
No helmet off scene, either. Bleh. Whatever, I guess.
None of this had any actual teeth. No drama, no emotion, just a bunch of (kinda shitty actually??) CGI explosions and whoop looks like we won yay great
I'm actually very annoyed they they didn't follow up on any of the suspicious shit the armorer has been doing all season. I was SURE she was going to be one of the spies last week's episode referenced. We never did get an explanation about that, did we? lol
Okay let's look at the very limited list of things I actually did like:
Din finally adopts Grogu!!! But nope we're not doing the Mandalorian adoption rites and Din is going to act as unenthusiastic as physically possible about it. Cool cool.
Din Grogu? What. Is that how Mandalorian names work???? You know what would have helped with this? Some actual Mando lore at all at any point in this entire season about Mandalorians. Wow.
This isn't really a list of things I liked huh
sorry lol
Uhhhh IG is back? I think? Maybe? Hard to tell if its actually him or just a reset IG-11 model. So was IG-12 a totally different droid??? (Also if it was literally as easy as stopping by any random bar and finding a head why didn't we do that in the first place. What the fuck.)
uhhhh they have a very tiny little house now? With a froggie pond! That's cute.
Din still refuses to actually call Grogu his child in any capacity, despite just literally adopting him as his own. Din get over your issues, that kid has been yours since the second you made eye contact with him. I wouldn't be as annoyed by this if they'd given me any reason why Din would be so hesitant to call Grogu family.
Everything about this just felt too easy and too neat. It's an entire episode of "blink and you miss it because it took 5 seconds and no work to do" events that have zero emotional payoff because they wasted the entire season on stupid shit that was never followed up on or made any sense.
My only decent takeaway is Din and Grogu both survived, nothing that happened this season apparently matters AT ALL to ANYTHING, so maybe things can get back to normal next season.
I hope we get some kind of official explanation for this at some point. I maintain that something must have happened internally for the writing to suddenly take such a drastic and obvious nosedive. All I can hope is that this was a temporary fluke and I don't have more seasons of this kind of boring nonsensical bullshit to look forward to.
Season overall gets a .5/10. And that's being generous. Disney, you should be ashamed of yourselves. "Best season yet" my entire ass.
I wash my hands of this season.
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9 ship songs
i got tagged by @omgkalyppso who shared a tav/origin (étoile/astarion) playlist they made. so i am doing the same lmao
i don't have anyone explicitly to tag so if anyone is interested, go ahead! you have my blessing!
the ship is my tav (i still need to fkin name him) and astarion. i've finished his personal quest and romance so it was fun to spend the day making this while i'm still fresh in my feelings.
'metaphor' by the crane wives ( stfy / yt )
astarion pov. the two meet for the first time. tav is more goody at this point, and so astarion acts very superficial towards him.
I've gotten good at leaning on metaphors
I've gotten good at living on someone else's page
I cut my teeth on second hand sentiments
You can't trust a single thing I say
I keep my closet free of skeletons
'Cause I'm much better at digging graves
But I always dig up bones in your sympathy
I can't trust a single thing you say
Don't look too hard, 'cause you won't like the scars he left in me
2. 'something in the way you are' by kimbra ( stfy / yt )
tav pov. post-bite has tav very interested in the vampire. relevant to their first intimate encounter.
I'm wondering about your childhood
Wonder if you were misunderstood
I'm watching you inside your head
I wonder if you know how long I can
And I can feel it in my bones
I love all of the sticks and stones
And every little word you say
You're breaking me in the best way
3. 'thunder lightning' by iamamiwhoami ( stfy / yt )
astarion pov. his behaviour doesn't seem to deter my tav. in fact, he seems to mostly go along with it.
Got to break the stillness for a while
Need to see dеstruction to feel alive
And when I say sorry I’m full of lies
Got a violеnt streak I'm not ashamed
Are you beat yet?
Pressure keeps rising high
Nothing thrills me like a savage game
4. 'snakeskin' by rina sawayama ( stfy / yt )
relates more to my oathbreaker tav and the influence astarion had in that outcome. he 'sheds' the oath like a snakeskin and follows a new path with his love
Looking for forgiveness
I ran into your madness
Shutting off my brain just to spite my heart
You're slithering, slithering, slithering into my heart, yeah
You're changing my, changing my, changing my, changing my mind, yeah
I'm shedding, I'm shedding, I'm shedding, I'm shedding my snakeskin
You're wearin' it, wearin' it, wearin' it every day, yeah
5. 'daffodil' by florence and the machine ( stfy / yt )
astarion pov. very much an 'oh no i didn't mean to fall in love' song.
I never thought it would get this far
This somewhat drunken joke
Sometimes, I see so much beauty
I don't think that I can cope
There is no bad, there is no good
I drank every sky that I could
Made myself mythical, tried to be real
Saw the future in the face of a daffodil
6. 'fade' by lewis capaldi ( stfy / yt )
tav pov. oh look another 'i didn't mean to fall in love' song. this one is more my tav reacting to what happens in astarion's personal quest.
Wish somebody would've told me
That I'd end up so caught up in need of your demons
That I'd be lost without you leading me astray
Guess I'm such a fucking fool for the way that you caught me
You make my heart break more every day
But don't fade away
Well, I know that we've been hardly holding on
To tell the truth, I can't believe we got this far
7. 'francesca' by hozier ( stfy / yt )
tav pov. post astarion personal quest. he was there for him since the beginning of their journey and he wouldn't have it any other way.
Do you think I'd give up
That this might've shook the love from me
Or that I was on the brink?
How could you think, darling, I'd scare so easily?
Now that it's done
There's not one thing that I would change
My life was a storm, since I was born
How could I fear any hurricane?
8. 'superstar' by marina ( stfy / yt )
they have seen each other at their absolute lowest and overcome some incredible adversaries. they are ride or die.
We'll stick together
Make it through the storm
You and I
Whoever said we couldn't have it all?
I love the way we worked so hard
Yeah, we've come so far
Baby, look at me, you're my superstar
When I'm afraid, when the world's gone dark
Come and save my day, you're my superstar
9. 'finding you' by kesha ( stfy / yt )
endgame. a nice conclusion for my brain sickness that is this ship.
I know forever don't exist
But after this life, I'll find you in the next
So when I say "forever, " it's the goddamn truth
I'll keep finding, finding you
I'm gonna search for your love
Right through Hell and Heaven
Millions of years yet to come
And in all dimensions
I know that you'll always be
My happy ending
#oc tag#my ocs#bg3#tav#astarion#ship playlist#long post#haven't made character playlists since my 8tracks fanmix days#this was fun
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BINGO ROUND UP
a GL & a disabled MC: pluto!! we got one gang!! i'm just so pleased that we're making some headway on GL being regularly scheduled as part of their production rotation as it should be <3 i will say that the plot of this one wouldn't be doing it for me if it weren't GL, and whacks of nicholas sparks a bit more than is usually my taste. BUT things change over production, and i'm more than willing to be surprised!! interesting that they're opting for another disabled lead specifically w/blindness. i'm still scared but hopeful about their engagement w disability generally, and i do think it's cool that they're not portioning out intersections to their own shows to be the ~ focal issues ~ . it bodes well i think, and i'm really buzzing to see namtan and film's dynamic.
big shock pairing to make me rub my hands together like a fly: my golden blood come collect your trophy!! also putting a dent on main role for fluke and speculative element series, this has me absolutely fucking roided with anticipation lmao. it looks bananas, and chancey, and like the people making it are determined to do so with fun and camp, which is my favourite way to see a project made. i love that as well as unbranded, fluke has managed to stay role flexible enough that he can slide into this fantasy damsel space, and i'm gagging to see it all. maybe he'll wear something white and billowing and dashed with blood, gmmtv seems to be in the spirit of granting wishes w this one.
there seemed to be some rivals to lovers edged stuff, but not in the flavours i wanted so i left it uncircled. also disappointed by the lack of girl violence...that friend vs friend/school gang series could have been fun if it'd been girls in ripped fishnets with bats but i digress.
2024 for 23.5 is not the series of numbers i wanted to write, and no final trailer. and also barely any milk!! she was only on stage the once and not for something i'm interested in, so i'm chalking that up to tragedy. but she looked fucking smashing today, so i'll just have to fold up her event portrait in a locket or smth
congrats to the enigma fans [weeps in midnight museum]
i'm frustrated by how much leaning is being done on remakes, even just because being tagged in so many people's bingo i see how many cool, original ideas there are out there, and it just makes me gag in corporate to see this laziness. i wanted to watch whatever the gemfourth offering was bc i liked them so much in moonlight chicken, but i'll probably be giving their kieta hatsukoi a miss. i've never seen ossan's love, and getting a last dance with mix was on my list so i'll probably give it a go but i'm still miffed about it
i got monkeys pawed on the fighting and stunts bc none of it (except the camp acrobatics of my golden blood) seems like my flavour. alas alack
and a campy comedic role for my girl jan in the other drama to hit my spec fic box!! just like UMG, peaceful property on sale (not 100% sure on the title) looks like exactly my bag. i'm indifferent to whether it's actually BL, but thrilled that tay will be there. i can't think of anyone better to play the guy that can see ghosts, given his huge irl superstitious dramatics and easy goosing. this show is going to be so fun, and i think i might have even spotted a similar ghost-makeup style to what they used in something in my room? i'm so looking forward to this one, and it's so rude of them to tease me with it in october of all times, and not give it to me immediately.
overall, hits, misses, dodgy singing. thanks to everyone who played bingo with me, you all have beautiful creative minds and i hope anyone who had a bingNO this time gets a better part 2 <33
#gmmtv 2024#gmmtv2024#genuinely thanks so much to everyone who played/tagged me when they used the template#i feel very connected to this wild exciting fiction-enjoyer community
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the best part of the fortnite articles wasn't even posted
Theres one with like 3 paragraphs going in depth about how lando was actually calling lewis "lulu" instead of "lewlew" and was "mocking and demasculating him" by "equating his name to that of a female's." (this is also inaccurate, for anyone who has fallen for it, because I've seen this idea floating around a few different socials). i wasn't feeling well mentally and had the day off, and i watched the whole stream. he ALWAYS referred to the lewis characters as "lewlew," usually in a very fond/excited to see them way/tone.
then this same article tried to claim he had his character bow at lewis' feet to make up for the mocking and i just — yeah. yeah. he meant to do that. that explains why he was so embarrassed he covered his face and looked away from the stream for several moments lmao.
and then don't even get me started on the oscar "mortally wounding" lando claim. that's based off nothing lando has ever said. he was disappointed in himself for making so many mistakes in Qatar, but he was never disappointed in oscar for doing better. He's mentioned Qatar and congratulated oscar in every single season in review video I've seen. This claim is based off some shit brundle was spewing. which is why i am once again, begging for all of the "British bias" bullshit to stop when it comes to non-merc drivers. Like there's a British driver on the grid who actually had the worst season of his career (I'll give you a hint: his name isn't in this message) and basically came last of the drivers in top teams that people had high hopes for, yet you still have brundle and sky calling him a future WDC and an imminent threat to lewis while basically throwing a #LandoNorrisIsOver party. The whole thing is quite funny.
(sorry if you got 2 messages like this, my internet keeps being weird so i wasn't sure the first one sent)
jesus fucking christ people are DELUSIONAL. i suddenly feel a lot better about overanalysing max/lewis as a ship, compared to people saying lando using a nickname is demasculating. i mean - lando is called lala by his cousin, i'd reckon he's got lewlew from it.
they are OVER analysing NOOTHING here. he didn't bow down he fucking clicked to make his character duck and then got flustered bc it looked like his female character was giving head to lewis lmao.
lando's the best fucking teammate on the grid. never seen anyone as supportive of his teammate as him. i think im not getting your lines but it might be bc i'm tired. and yeah british bias is the worst of all of them. even viaplay's dicksucking of max is nothing in comparison.
oh yeah my favorite british driver! how dare you speak truths about him. it's so fucked up to me how the british media is so fucking negative about good drivers (also w lewis' 'this is lewis' second season without wins' or something post like HELLO he's also a 7 time wdc) or how they (like everyone, really) keep underestimating lando. if i were british media i'd be embarrassingly proud of my countrymates. every mistake they make is fine dw you're the best and every good thing they do gets praised into the heavens. but no, of course they only do it with mr Public Relations. and not mental-health awareness lando or activist-for-everything and also the only black guy on the grid lewis.
fucking tired of F1 journalism. can they all collectively stop? scrap presscons too, only give us post-race interviews on the paddock and then w everyone and done. i'd be happy. all drivers will be happy.
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Life Update
Just checking in.
It's been going... mixed, lately? Nothing terrible, but I have a lot on my mind. I feel in flux, like I'm at an indiscernible turning point and need to make a huge decision.
Work and Life Choices
My work stress levels are on the high end, recently. I'm bringing a new assay to the company, and that's been difficult because... I can't ask anyone for help. No one has the knowledge, lol! My first trial run was a huge success, and I'm a bit blown away. Basically, work keeps asking me to do novel stuff with little support, and I just... Keep?? Delivering???? And I realize this sounds braggy, but like- No one is more surprised than I am, believe me.
Meanwhile, I was asked to help with selecting a lead candidate for a project, which is totally new to me and was always the responsibility of folks one, two, or more "steps" above me in the company hierarchy. I've never been given this opportunity, but also... The only reason I made headway is because a senior colleague kindly helped me. HOWEVER, my manager asked me to meet with him before showing my plan to the project co-lead, since I'm new to this. AND THEN HE PEACED OUT TO A CONFERENCE FOR A WEEK AND LEFT TWO DAYS EARLIER THAN EXPECTED. So. That really stressed me out! I still don't really know how to handle it, but you can only maintain that level of stress for so long. You eventually enter the universe of, "I cannot be fucked. I am unfuckable."
Although as an asexual bean lol-
The good news is that it really benefits me to gain this knowledge- it's within my wheelhouse, but it's always been considered above my pay grade until now. Contrast this with bringing new technologies to the company and working with new formats. Folks keep asking me how to use the machine that can purify mAbs (basically the most... simple/common antibody format used in biotech), and I keep telling them... I've never been assigned mAb work, so I have no idea. I'm over here working with VHH and IgA and weird multispecifics exclusively.
I got another email on Friday where my boss assigned me more novel stuff I've never done. I can't exactly argue when he's in a conference, but... I am... Unsure... How I can get all of this done, lmao???
On the other hand, I dove into my work benefits to figure something out, and I realized that... Um, my total compensation package is... Well, it's a lot better than anything I've had before, in terms of money. It's... Uh, it's a mixed feeling. Obviously, it's great to be paid better than I ever have been. But it also makes me feel more locked into this career and this place, because... It's finally "paying off." My husband and I have been talking about starting a family, but I told him that I don't see myself having children in a household with two working parents and no support.
This is deeply personal, and obviously income plays a role, too. Many American families cannot afford two working parents, because daycare costs more than one or both parents' salaries. In our case, I make less than my husband, but after taxes and contributing to retirement, daycare would cost about 45% of my remaining take home.
However.
On Friday, I asked a colleague who I just met how she was doing. She had dark bags under her eyes- the kind of thing written about in novels, but rarely seen in real life. And she replied, "Well, I haven't been able to stop working long enough to eat for a few days. I came home and my children were needy and we have a new puppy who was wrecking things and I just went in my room and shut the door and sobbed."
That was a bit intense for a first ever "how are you," but regardless... This is so many women I know, including my mother. I absolutely have seen involved and loving husbands/fathers, but I've seen more who work and then vanish into the mancave the rest of the time. I have a teammate who purposefully works from 1-7 PM to avoid his kids and inlaws, leaving childcare, food, and housework to his wife (and frankly, he made me do his work for half a year until I cracked and told my boss to remove me from working closely with him). My husband is a gem who frankly takes care of me more than I take care of him, so I don't have to fear this, but...
Well, we don't have support. It would be us vs the world with a baby, and my country offers nothing to help families out. And, as we all know, the costs needed to live (housing, healthcare, education, food) are drastically rising.
I really do not know what the next steps in my life are, and I'm already at the point of "geriatric" pregnancy (mid thirties). Do I keep up with this challenging, interesting career that pays well, but is incredibly stressful? Do I have a child and give up the career? Do I try to do it all (two parents who work full time and a kid)? Will I end up like my colleague if I do that? Will giving up my job make me feel unfulfilled? Will the loss of income wreck me someday?
Stress, Creating, Self Care
So, like... I've been stressed, as you might notice. My ear started ringing, with varying intensity and pitch, so I couldn't sleep on Thursday night. Thankfully, it stopped after about 24-32 hours, because I was losing my mind! The internet listed stress as a cause, and... Yeah, I'm thinking it's that.
On top of this, my husband was away for work from Wednesday to Saturday, so I ran the house by myself and was on my own. I was slammed last week and did not have any mental juice to spare.
I haven't done much creatively in February. I can't get my brain to do it, but I'm also not really trying? Usually, when I'm not creating, Bad Things are happening. I'm not sure if I'm there or not, or if I just have other things going on right now? I am getting the sense that I need to do more for myself. I'm not... Sure... What that is, though.
I'm thinking exercise. I gained weight over the pandemic, and lately I feel physically and mentally lethargic. So... Eating better and exercise are probably what I should focus on right now?
I can never seem to keep the mental health, physical health, work, relationships, and chore balls in the air. I tend to drop the physical health ball most readily, which goes about as well as you'd imagine.
I'm hoping to figure out what fun stuff my husband and I might do this year. I need something to look forward to, because it's been so easy (tempting, even?) to feel overwhelmed by all the scary and uncertain things.
I have not been creating, and I have not been online much. Apologies for that. It's one of those "my cup is empty" periods, but I'm not in trouble. I'm just sort of... Looking at the empty cup and going, "Hmm. I should fill this, but, uh... How?" And also, "What kind of cup do I want in the future?"
I truly hope you're all taking care and holding on and finding ways to flourish. It's hard, man. I'm wishing you wellness, kindness, love, growth, support, and well-being. Thanks for caring about me <3
Love,
Hidden
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hello. i’ve been reading your thoughts about conte and i agree with some of your thoughts. i’m also reading comments from people and trying to get a better understanding about the situation. if you suggest we should sack him, who do you think would be a good replacement? considering that whoever the manager is, it’s still gonna be a challenge if the owners or the club keeps doing nothing to back the manager. as i understand it, this situation has become a cycle and it can’t be fixed by only changing managers (or do you think it actually could?) thank you! sorry if you have talked about this before and i probably missed it.
hello!! this ended up being really long so i'll put it under a read more
so to be completely honest i don't really have an answer on who i think should come in next. i know tuchel's name keeps getting thrown about and i did like what he did at chelsea (he's the only chelsea manager i've ever liked whilst they were managing them haha) but surely at some point we have to move away from the ex-chelsea manager thing lmao it is a little bit embarrassing us always going after their castoffs. i'm really torn on poch coming back because i think it might be too soon, but then at the same time, there's only really 5 players left from his time so there's plenty of new ears that would be listening to him and he would play better football than we've got now. i know a lot of people still think potter could do a job but i think he'd be out of his depth with us too, i've not seen a single thing from him at chelsea that makes me think actually yeah he'd be a good fit for us, and i wasnt overly impressed with him at swansea (cooper did better with a worse squad) so i personally dont want him anywhere near us. after poch i was actually like 'i'd settle for howe' and i think he's done great job at newcastle but unless they sack him for a big name or something, he's not leaving them for us. at this point in time though i really just feel like anyone but fucking conte, i shouldn't be physically at matches thinking if i closed my eyes i could easily fall asleep lmao. it's awful that my dad (and others) didn't go to the north london derby of all games because they just can't stand to watch us play right now.
i do agree that we shouldn't just keep sacking managers. the only club that's worked for is chelsea but they thrive from chaos lmao and we are not them. we have been better when we stuck with a manager. however, conte isn't showing me anything that makes me think 'yeah he just needs a bit of time to sort this out'. but whatever happens even if we don't sack conte now, he's not going to be here in the summer and i've said that since the start of this season. there's no point in backing a manager now if he's not going to be here in the summer because then you just end up with a new manager with a bunch of players that aren't his own and especially with the way conte loves older players.
i think the whole backing managers thing isn't necessarily black and white. personally i think conte was backed last january in a way that poch never was. conte was definitely back in the summer with the likes of richarlison - i'm still shocked we paid so much money for him (i like him but i'm not sure he's worth 60m to us - but maybe we'll get more out of him next season). we've also cleared out players under conte (okay some only on loan but they're not physically at the club) which we didn't seem willing to do before him. when you look at poch's last summer he was backed with the money we spent on ndombele, lo celso and sess and clarke - but firstly it was too late, and secondly especially with ndombele it wasn't money well spent. sess is the only one still at the club and bless his soul he's not having the best time. so i think there's an element of we actually are willing to back managers now, but we just don't seem to be spending the money well. paratici is now the one who is meant to be dealing with all this, and i think it's unfair that when it's a signing people like they praise him but when they don't like it they blame levy. i think paratici's signings have been a bit hit and miss, and i don't trust his taste in managers at all. i don't think he's the guy for us, and all the stuff with the investigations in to juve leave me a bit nervous tbh.
i think levy needs to accept these big superstar managers just aren't for us. we are never going to act like chelsea when it comes to spending money, so bringing someone in who complained that chelsea didn't spend enough money for him was never going to work. i think we need to take a step back, get someone in who is actually willing to work on a project and plays somewhat progressive football. i was willing to give mourinho a chance and move away from how i was used to watching us play in exchange for actually success with trophies, but after him and now conte (who is absolutely shite in cups lmao) not working i just want to go back to enjoying watching my team. if we're not going to win trophies i'd rather we play with some flair and excitement than not win trophies still and be absolutely horrific to watch. i also want my manager to feel like he is part of the club, and not someone who's just doing us a favour and we should all be so thankful because he was successful at other clubs, you know?
to sum it up - a change in manager to someone who is actually willing to coach and improve players does fix a lot of problems, but the club need to take a look at themselves. if you are not going to back a manager and spend the money like chelsea then don't bring in managers that can only work with that. go back to what we know works and is sustainable but just spend money more wisely when we do spend big, then we will be grand.
i know a lot of people found windy annoying for being very anti-mourinho but i think his little blog post here sums up how i feel quite well too
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I posted 571 times in 2022
That's 230 more posts than 2021!
89 posts created (16%)
482 posts reblogged (84%)
Blogs I reblogged the most:
@juldooz-atla
@cobraonthecob
@the-badger-mole
@zutarawasrobbed
I tagged 112 of my posts in 2022
#zutara - 41 posts
#zutara month 2022 - 17 posts
#zuko - 12 posts
#anon asks - 12 posts
#katara - 12 posts
#pro zutara - 8 posts
#zutara week 2022 - 8 posts
#fanfiction - 8 posts
#jet - 8 posts
#jetara - 7 posts
Longest Tag: 86 characters
#when i continue writing my jetara fic im gonna picture jet like this during flashbacks
My Top Posts in 2022:
#5
Why does everyone say "I wish zutara was canon" lmao have you seen the creators and their writing?? We've got everything we need in fanfics and art—hell, even AMVs! Canon is overrated!
Zutara exists in every way that matters.
96 notes - Posted April 3, 2022
#4
LMFAOOOOO why are they so mad?!?!
Imagine going on AO3 and looking for a fic for a ship that you don't even like at 6 in the morning. Talk about dedication! I love my fans <3
Anyways! I'm going to continue minding my business and writing my stories✍🏾
103 notes - Posted March 10, 2022
#3
I've talked about this on twitter, but the way canon shippers defend their ships with their whole chest is hilarious. You're that defensive because zutara is mentioned? Why? You HAVE canon, you have EVERYTHING, yet you still care about what we ship? It's giving insecurity to be honest. It's been fifteen years and you'd think they'd get it through their heads that zutara fans don't give a flying FUCK about what's canon.
Why would we when our fan content is better than anything Bryke would put out? LMAOOO
109 notes - Posted October 6, 2022
#2
These Things I've Done
"Katara, you're not a monster. You'll never be a monster."
She shook her head angrily, unable to contain herself any longer. "No, I don't think you understand, Aang. I decided to end that man's life today. I did that. Not Zuko, not Sokka, me. And if you can't handle that then you can just kindly fuck off!"
Aang sputtered, "You don't mean that—"
She let out a bitter chuckle, "Oh, I think I do," She stepped closer to the airbender so that they were face to face, toe to toe, "And I won't repeat it."
He was breathing harder now, his eyes wide, unable to believe what she was saying. She was perfect. Katara was always perfect. So innocent and kind. So why was he seeing her so differently now? Why was she acting this way?
"Katara, I think Zuko has corrupted you somehow. This isn't like you—"
She clenched her jaw, pressing her finger into his chest, "Oh, no no no—we are not doing this again. You and I? We are not the same. We've never been the same! You can't tell me how to live my life just because you don't agree with it! I ended that man's life because he killed my mother! I was owed that! And I'll be damned if I let anyone else tell me otherwise!"
"And if you think for a second that I am gonna let you slander my best friend then you've got another thing coming! Zuko was there for me, he's always been there for me! So why won't you? Why can't you support me on the one thing that would give me closure?"
"Katara, the monks always say to—"
"I don't care what the monks said, Aang! I am not a monk! I am Katara from the Southern Water Tribe. I am not you! Why don't you understand that?"
"Katara–"
"I'm sorry, Aang," She gulped, swallowing the lump in her throat, "But if you're going to shame me for killing my mother's murderer then I don't think we can be friends anymore."
Part II Part III Part IIII Part V Part VI
182 notes - Posted August 25, 2022
My #1 post of 2022
"zk is mostly katara-centric" first off, so what? And secondly, we love them both equally. Katara gets more hate than any of the other characters. As a brown girl, she can't get too emotional. She can't bloodbend because then she'll be "evil", and she can't be nuanced or too complex.
Outside of zks and the occasional Katara stan, who else is gonna ride and die for her character?? Casual fans who don't even remember what happened in the show?? Antis?? Just shut up already, you sound like a broken record.
186 notes - Posted July 24, 2022
Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →
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Speaking of what if scenarios with the skrulls, do you know if there will definitely be a season 2 of what if where we might finally see Gamora's episode? I'm beyond glad she's not a skrull but I do hope for a tiny bit more content for her and I think What if would be the way to do it.
And since you posted about merch before do you know if there have been any updates or information released on Gamora getting more? I have mostly resigned myself to her never getting anything else but part of me is still not comfortable with this and I'm hurt they brought her back only to ignore her this badly. I know vol 3 should have done better but she was still there and had more of a role than some characters. They act like she didn't exist or was only in one scene. I think I remember seeing Taserface get a funko after vol 2 and he definitely had a smaller role than Gamora has in vol 3.
so it's been previously reported that what if was greenlit for a s2 and s3, and last year at sdcc marvel announced that we'd be getting what if s2 in "early 2023" (this announcement is still the pinned tweet on the what if twitter account, even), but it's kinda fallen to the wayside bc of disney/marvel re-evaluating their content output on disney+ this year. like you know how a bunch of streamers have just been randomly deleting shows and movies over the last couple months? the companies are trying to save money by reducing how much streaming content they're hosting, so i think that's what's been delaying what if s2. i wouldn't be surprised if s2 (and maybe even s3) is already completely finished and disney's just hoarding the files and biding their time, just to be fucking annoying, frankly
on the gamora front—yes, it's been confirmed since s1's release that there's an ep featuring her that was missing! the gamora we saw in the guardians of the multiverse was supposed to be in a tony-centric ep that had to be delayed due to covid:
An episode that centered on Tony Stark was supposed to premiere in this first batch of episodes, What If…? creator A.C. Bradley confirmed to Polygon. But due to COVID-19-related production issues, the episode was unable to be completed on time for release, forcing producers to bump it off to What If…? season 2 (which is good news for anyone hoping for a What If…? season 2).
While “What If… The Watcher Broke His Oath?” now raises some accidental questions about Tony and Gamora’s relationship in a pocket of the multiverse, Bradley says it was worth the trouble. “Given the global tragedy of the pandemic, pushing an episode is nothing,” she wrote to Polygon. “I only hope viewers have been entertained these last 9 weeks, and enjoyed the ride as much as I did.”
that's likely part of why gamora still got what if merch in 2021, though i still maintain that if gamora being in what if of all things could warrant her getting merch, then she should've gotten merch for vol 3, 100%, straight fax no printer. like, there is no way that animated, non-mainline mcu, d+ series WHAT IF had more viewers who'd be interested in buying merch than a LITERAL THEATRICAL MAINLINE FILM ☠️ like...yo LMAO
i haven't personally seen any updates about gamora getting vol 3 merch on any of my social media feeds, but i've seen some of the funko collectors on reddit speculating abt another wave of vol 3 figures that she could be part of or something. but now that we're nearing 2 months post-vol 3, i honestly don't have high hopes for any new merch featuring her to come out :/// esp with marvel now seeming to have shifted focus to secret invasion (which just started releasing on d+ today), i'm not rly expecting any new anything in general on the gotg/vol 3 front tbh
however, if what if s2 ever returns from war and we finally get the tony & gamora ep, maybe we'll get some more merch of her for that? 😵💫 lol i hate it here
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survey #088
(taken december 14th last year; uploading surveys done while gone)
Can you read lips?
NO. I am *HORRIBLE* at trying to read lips, like I absolutely can't.
Do you have trouble feeling excited for other people when they receive good news?
Oh absolutely not, I definitely get excited too!
Do you know anyone whose parents are homosexual?
I know I have a mom friend who is bi, but she's in a relationship with a man currently. I don't THINK I know anyone full-on gay that's a parent?
Do you consider yourself patriotic? In what ways?
Hell no, this country grosses me the fuck out.
Are you part of any online communities? If so, which ones, and how did you get involved in them?
I'm in a meerkat RP circle, I'm an admin at the SH wiki (which I have been awfully neglecting lol oops), and I'm active in my WoW main's guild.
Have you ever purchased clothing that you were too afraid to wear?
HA yes, when I was still a teen-ish I had this honestly really cute black crop top that just says "FREAK" and I only wore it for a single picture, lol. It would never fit me now. I actually think I mighta got rid of it.
What is your lover's middle name?
He doesn't have one.
When was the last time you saw your last ex?
Well I saw a PICTURE of us on Facebook like a day or two ago, and fucking finally FB allowed me to delete them. I haven't seen her in person in years and never want to again, either.
Who was the last ex you talked to?
Sara.
Who is your best friend? Pick only one.
My boyfriend Girt.
Who was the last person to flirt with you, other than your lover?
Some random dude on dA, he got blocked real quick lmao.
Would it bother you if your lover flirted with other people?
Uh yes???
What exes do you still associate with?
None.
What is a topic that interests you so much that you could read about it for hours?
Meerkat behaviorisms.
Are there any holidays that you hate? If so, which and why do you dislike them?
Columbus Day because that man didn't discover jack shit. Thanksgiving (its roots anyways, it's definitely evolved) because it's a literal celebration of genocide and slavery, etc.
Do you have a secret that you’ve kept for a long time – years, maybe your entire life? If so, why haven’t you told anyone about this secret?
Yes, and I don't tell anybody because they affect nobody, are entirely benign, and just really don't matter.
What was the very first social media site you signed up for?
MySpace.
If you were in a coma, who would be making healthcare decisions for you?
My mom.
What’s something you’ve done that sounds too crazy to be true?
The only thing that comes to mind is how many times I've been admitted to psych hospitals; like I lost count many visits ago. I would estimate I've been like, six times. I feel like people who know that would expect me to be crazier than I am.
Does anyone in your family smoke?
My dad and his wife do.
What’s your opinion on hunting?
Trophy hunting? Fucking barbaric, repulsive, diabolical, just evil. IF however you are hunting for food and have a respectful, appreciative mindset of the animal, then I'm more okay with it than I once was, because here's the thing: that deer you killed out in the beautiful woods, and probably rather quickly, ABSOLUTELY had a better life than that mistreated, miserable cow that was raised simply to be killed and probably given LESS than the bare necessities. I want to emphasize though, mindset is so important here; I wouldn't support you if you were tracking a deer seeking the "thrill" of just killing it. Like in that case, get fucking help. Be very respectful and extremely appreciative of that animal's unwilling sacrifice.
Have you ever had a pet escape and run away?
Oh my god I will never forget Teddy doing this one winter night in the snow. I was going BALLISTIC as my dad ran and later drove after him. If I remember well, he ended up being at the pond not too far from our place, which he and Dale (another old dog of ours) had run to before to play. Thank god he was okay, at this time he just still had good energy and was very into marking his territory and smelling EVERYTHING. He also really, really enjoyed the snow, he used to love zooming through it and just playing.
Do any of your exes know each other?
Jason and Juan knew and didn't like each other (at least, I was aware Juan openly didn't like Jason, I'm not really sure if Jason felt anything about him). Tyler MIGHT have known either of them, too, I don't know.
What’s an opinion you find impossible to take seriously?
"Dinosaurs aren't real," especially when they add on, "Satan put those bones there to lead us away from God." You are PURELY fucking delusional.
Have you met that person that can get into your mind through a sentence?
Yeah, Jason. Probably still to this day. He had so much goddamn power over my emotions without even intending it, and I feel like that hasn't fully gone away.
Have you heard of Jeffree Star? What do you think of him?
Yes, I genuinely like him and who he's grown into and think his work ethic is fucking unreal.
Who do you think you have cried over the most?
lol do I really need to answer this???????????
Do you hate celebrities with big boobs and have had plastic surgery?
lol grow up?????? People can do whatever the fuck they want with their own bodies.
Is anybody in your family schizophrenic? If so, what is their life like?
A half-sister is, but I've never met or spoken to her; I've seen literally a single picture of her in my entire life. I have no idea what her life is like. Sometimes it rears up to bother me more than usual, how Dad's only kids he interacts with at all are me and my immediate sisters... Even his other daughter Misty had to reach out to HIM when she and her children visited here to go out to dinner so he could actually meet them. Like, that shouldn't be his child's job. Misty is understandable bitter about how she grew up (her mother was absolute, total, 100% insane shit that couldn't even keep custody of her BECAUSE she was fucking mental, and Dad didn't take her), and I just wish she didn't have to be by Dad acting more like a dad to her. WOW welcome to the family therapy session y'all
What’s something somebody can do to make you hate them instantly?
Say something inappropriate about a child came to mind first, but there's really a lot of other stuff, honestly. Just being a shitty, gross, violent, and/or forceful person.
Are there regular trains in and out of your town/city?
Yes.
What was the last animal you saw, and was it a pet?
Roman, right now, 'cuz he jumped up onto the desk to chill by me.
Have you ever watched an anime series, start to finish?
Yeah, multiple.
Do you feel the need to rant about anything right now? If so, go for it.
So my Tumblr account just RANDOMLY got terminated yesterday (I seriously mean it when I say I did absolutely, positively nothing whatsoever) and I'm rather annoyed by it. This has already happened to me once on my old account, and it took like around a week to get the damn thing back.
How many serious relationships have you been in?
Three. Ish. I don't really know what to consider Sara's and my former relationship. Like I feel like we had genuine feelings and did some romantic things without much shyness or anything, but idk. Jason and Girt were/are SO much different from what she and I had.
Do you have a lot of regrets?
Yes, and they fucking haunt me and refuse to let me go so I can maybe even mildly like myself.
Have you ever been so angry that you screamed out of nowhere?
Yes. I know I've done this a couple times into a pillow, maybe other times without but idr.
Do you have any plans for Valentine’s Day this year?
NEXT year I know I want to do at least a LITTLE something. Girt had Covid this year so we couldn't hang out that day and it super bummed me out, really.
What do you usually buy for snacks when you go to the cinema?
Almost always popcorn, rarely some sort of candy.
Look to your left and name five things you can see.
Presents for Ash's kids from Mom, the closet, the stand with the printer on it, paper shredder, and a cute piece of random artwork on the wall from who knows where.
Do you like having your lip softly bitten when you’re kissing?
bro get outta my bedroom
Who is your favourite YouTuber?
Overall? It'll probably always be Markiplier, he's my idol, but I really haven't watched him anywhere near regularly in like... two years? His content just generally isn't my style anymore, but I still love him as a person to death. You know, I'm really not too sure WHO my active favorite is anymore. Maybe John Wolfe or Game Grumps, I really don't know.
Have you ever been hopelessly in love with a celebrity?
Nah. I have my fangirl episodes, but "hopefully in love" has never been the right phrase at all. I know none of these people personally and therefore can't even truly LOVE them and have always known that absolutely nothing is ever going to happen between me and any random person on the Internet. I can just melt from afar lmao.
What was the last band shirt you wore?
I'm quite sure it was Ninja Sex Party. Thankfully it doesn't say the name of the band on the shirt lmfao I wouldn't want to explain that ever.
How many pairs of glasses (not sunglasses) have you owned?
I know at least three.
What color is your flash-drive?
Hot pink.
What is your favorite color(s) of eye-makeup?
B L A C K
Have you ever worn a thumb ring?
Yes; that's where I put mine and Sara's friendship ring. Safe to say I don't have it anymore.
What brand of TV do you own?
Uh I'm pretty positive it's a Vizio?
Are high school football games fun?
Ugh, no. I used to have to go to them quite a bit when my older sister was a cheerleader. There were always wasps and shit around/under the bleachers, it was hot, too crowded, and I just had absolutely no interest in sports. They were also way too long to me. I know a lot of the time Nicole and I didn't even watch, we'd just go find something weird to do that generally involved getting dirty, meeting with other kids that were as bored as us, and going under the bleachers when we weren't supposed to lmao.
When was the last time you had a particularly hectic day?
Oh hell if I know.
To whom do you feel the most important?
Mom and Girt.
How long has your favorite song been your favorite?
Since it came out early this year lmao.
Is one of your favorite colors yellow?
No, I actually really don't like yellow.
How old are your siblings?
Tbh I only have my two immediate sisters' ages memorized, which are 29 and 24. Others are in their 30s. Katie might even be close to 40, idr and can't math.
Ever had a fishtank in your room?
No.
Do you drink more soda than anything else?
Not anymore! It's generally flavored sparkling water.
Do you know anyone who wears camouflage often?
my brother in christ I live in the SOUTH
How many jobs have you had?
Three.
Do you hate your last ex?
I VERY much don't like her, at all, but I'm past my "ugh I hate her" phase. I ain't wasting my energy on hating someone I never have to see or speak to ever again.
Are you ashamed of any of your family members?
My uncle who my family no longer associates with. He's a fucking filthy slug of a human being.
Have you ever been in a courtroom?
Yes.
Were you a chubby child?
No, I was pretty normal.
Are you afraid to sing in front of people?
Yes. To get you to visualize the sheer extent, in the over three and a half years Jason and I dated, he heard me sing ONCE, at church.
When did you last dance with someone?
Uh with Sara a few years ago.
Do you feel awkward watching sex scenes?
Yes, but not AS bad as when I was like, a teenager. I still do feel exceptionally uncomfortable if it's with my mom present, though.
Did you ever have senior photos done?
No. I wanted to, we just... didn't, I don't remember why.
Do you attend church regularly?
You literally could not even PAY me to go to church, never mind regularly. It's complete fucking brainwashing and greatly diminishes genuine, confident self-worth. I don't consider myself a Satanist, but even I can still say hail thyself, hunty.
Have you ever wanted to be a teacher?
lol absolutely not.
Are you currently listening to music?
Yeah, "Modern Love" by Mother Mother just started.
The person who last spoke to you in person, what is their name?
Donna, but Mom to me.
The person who last texted you, tell me their name?
Still Donna, lol.
What was your favorite class to take in school?
Art courses and German.
Have you ever had a pixie cut?
No, but I'd like one one day... Both my mom and hairdresser have told me I would look amazing with one now, which I really appreciated, but I just can't convince myself. I know it's a stereotype that fat people usually can't pull off short hair, and trust me it was ballsy enough for me to get it as short as it is now, I'd just be so obsessively paranoid that people would think I'm uglier with a pixie cut.
Is your signature legible?
I think so, yeah.
If the person you like/love proposed to you right now, you would say?
I know I'd say yes even though I know it's unwise to do so this early. Thankfully I'm pretty damn sure just given Girt's intelligence and dedication and strong pragmatism, he knows way better than to do that anytime soon.
Are you satisfied with your current camera?
I sure am, and I'm actually pretty excited, I know Mom is ordering a pack of lenses (polarizing, ND, and UV) for it for Christmas!
When was the last time you felt ignored?
Um idk. Probably during some family dinner at my sister's, I know I've been totally talked over adn brushed off more than once.
Is smoking an immediate turnoff to you?
I won't ever attracted to a smoking man til I saw Richard Kruspe bro 😭 lol but generally yes, celebs don't count, right?
If given the opportunity, would you legally change your name?
Nah, too used to this one and plus I like it.
Has religion ever come between you and a friend or family member?
Yep.
Has anyone ever told you that you were worthless?
Well, in fucking essence, Sara has.
If you jumped out the nearest window, would you live?
Yes, very easily.
Is there an animal that scares you?
I have a very intense irrational fear of larva, like maggots and stuff. Cicadas also notably freak me out, I can't handle their eyes. Whale sharks are another irrational fear, their mouths creep me out. Australian spiders like their funnel-web are freaky too.
When you get blood tests, do you feel faint afterwards?
No.
Do you think you will have a date for prom?
Whoa now buddy you are WAY late, lol. I went to Jason's senior prom and he went to mine.
Are you afraid of being cheated on?
Not really, at least not with Girt. I hope this doesn't sound all arrogant or full of myself, but just factually, this guy wanted me way too long for me to even really WONDER if he'd cheat on me. He's directly told me he wanted to date in high school, but he didn't do anything because he was concerned what people would think of the age gap. Then Jason came along and he respected that.
Do you know how to play poker?
It's actually funny, I did as a KID but don't now, hahaha. I really enjoyed it as a child, just obviously without monetary gambling.
Is your face shape oval, heart shaped or square?
I genuinely don't know.
When was the last time someone asked you to go somewhere?
When Girt invited me to his place Friday for his sister's birthday.
Do you have small wrists?
Yeah; even with my size, my wrists are definitely noticeably small. Like I can slip those security bracelets off at the psych hospital (lmfao what a talent) or like the skating rink to show you paid.
Are you someone’s best friend?
Girt always calls me his. <3
What’s the biggest annoyance in your life right now?
The state of my legs, really. I'm gonna get on fixing this shit, I've had enough. It stops me from SO much.
Do you know anyone that smokes weed?
I know one major pothead irl as well as one online; I'm certain others do it, but being a pothead is like, literally a major part of these two girls' personalities.
How many times have you kissed the last person you kissed?
A hell of a lot.
Thinking back to the person you fell hardest for, do you still feel that way?
Nope.
If you’re a girl, what’s your bra size?
Funny thing, I actually don't know. I know I'm naturally a C-something, but being my weight, I'm not at all convinced that's accurate right now. This is gonna sound wild, but I haven't had a properly-fitting bra in literal years; I just wear some that were Mom's that somewhat fit, but absolutely not properly, but enough to where it's not incredibly obvious with clothes on. I'm pretty sure I need something custom because if the cup fits, the back doesn't, and if the back fits, the fucking cup doesn't. It's extremely annoying, but bras are not cheap, especially when you're not a standard size.
Ever known anyone who did business with a prostitute?
I have zero idea.
If your parents are divorced, how old are your step parents?
Kim is a couple years younger than Dad, so mid/late 50s.
Do you like your step parents, or are they assholes?
She's an intolerant bigot/obnoxious Christian, but she has good traits, too.
[TW: DOMESTIC VIOLENCE/ABUSE]
Ever had an abusive parent or other family member?
No, thankfully.
Ever walked in on your parents while they were getting busy? If so, how many times and how old were you?
No; I find it SO hard to accept that my parents ever did have sex lmao, they were SO incompatible and just never got along, it seemed like growing up.
If you were to get pregnant as a teen, what would happen?
Well, I woulda kept it, because at the time I was pro-life. Thank fuck this never happened.
Do you prefer broccoli or asparagus?
Broccoli, I absolutely hate asparagus.
What was the last flattering thing someone did/said to/for you?
Uhhhhhh let's see probably something Girt said, he honestly says stuff like that a lot. ;__; <3
Do you know anybody that believes that magic/witchery truly exists?
Yep, my sister Misty to name just one.
Roughly how hot are the summer temperatures where you reside?
Usually 90s, sometimes low 100s. I absolutely hate it.
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Unpopular opinion: Makoto should've been angrier with Haru during that fireworks scene. Actually, I think Haru was a bad friend (throughout S2) tbh.
Here we have a friend who has been with Haru through thick and thin, even during the time Haru and Rin had that little beef when they were kids. In Makoto's POV Haru suddenly became upset to the point where he doesn't want to swim, suddenly quits the club and distanced himself from all his friends. All without any context. So what does Makoto do?
He simply quits the club too, wasn't able to keep as close contact to his friends like before, and stayed by Haru's side all till high school- that's three years. And btw, he STILL didn't pry or ask Haru about what exactly happened to get him in such a state, he silently respected Haru's boundaries and was there for him.
So to have all his kindness and generosity of basically tending to Haru's needs before his own, thrown back at his face when Haru accused him of "meddling" and telling him to "mind his business"- EXCUSE ME? Are you KIDDING ME? He's been there for you since DAY 1, HARU. All he wants you to do is think about your future! He never even told you to have a job, he literally said "if you're happy with it, then I won't force you" but he knew you were just SCARED!
And I'm sorry, I get that Haru was just overwhelmed in the situation and felt he had no other choice... BUT- the fact that Makoto, for once, put his own life before anyone else's and found a dream for himself; he wanted to tell Haru immediately but got shot down multiple times. Only during the scene did it come out because Haru, WITHOUT TALKING TO HIM, assumed Makoto didn't figure out a dream (then said "why aren't you speaking"- lmao okay Haru real classy) and the response he gets is his most precious friend RUNNING AWAY FROM HIM.
-Like I can't explain how nonsensical Haru's accusations were in that damn fight. "Meddling?", Haru he literally never knew what got you so down during middle school but never asked to respect your boundaries. But the one time he wants to help steer you in the right direction, he's "meddling"? Okay YAH SURE.
For me, that little moment they had after the airport scene, where Haru is like "I'm sowwy 🥺"- yeah no that doesn't cut it. Makoto shouldn't have even been there at the airport. Haru should've done a little more than just words, and actively made it up to him. Because I know for someone like Makoto, words like that cut deep. It's hard to get over knowing all the time you stuck by your friend, practically boyfriend, was thought of as "meddling".
TL;DR: There should've been at least half an episode where Haru did a little more to apologise for what he said to Makoto, and I mean literally ANYTHING more. I get Haru's not like that, but if he really was sorry I feel he would've gone out of his comfort zone to convey how much he means that. Makoto, though could've forgiven him already, shouldn't have just forgotten the fight immediately, I know he's perfect but he's also human. It's fine for him to hold a grudge once in a while, especially when it wasn't even fully resolved. Maybe then it wouldn't feel so... undeserved? Having that "Okaeri, Tadaima" scene.
Honestly I could talk about this scene for days but I've already written a whole essay I'm so sorry-
Hmm i understand your reasoning completely, the things Haru said were unacceptable and we definitely shouldn't have just had a brushed aside apology.
But isn't that the apeal of Makoto and by extention Makoharu? The selflessness, the silent understanding, the immediate forgiveness? I completely get wanting a conversation with Haru begging for forgiveness, especially for calling him meddlesome. @caffernnn and i have talked endlessly about a good apology scene for the fireworks scene, bc you're right Haru was bang out of order, he knew the impact of his words, and he chose them specifically to hurt Makoto as much as possible. That's a terrible thing to do especially when, as you also pointed out, Makoto was the only one who didn't actually push him to become a swimmer but just wanted Haru's happiness.
But, Haru is borderline depressed at this point, and the one person he thought wouldn't press the matter, the one person who's always been his safety away from the prying minds and overwhelming questions and pushing and the pressure seems to now also be the same as everyone else insisting that he find a dream and just be what everyone expects of him. That kind of, what must've seemed like to Haru, betrayal must've hurt something terrible. Not saying what Haru did was right but you have to understand the pain he must've been feeling. Haru's not just Makoto's most important person, Makoto is the same for Haru. So of course he's gonna be broken, and of course he lashed out.
As for the airport scene, i completely completely disagree. That scene is SO important to me. It's integral for the Makoharu, bc they are after all home for each other. They need to have the safety of messing up without the fear of losing each other. That's what sets them apart from every other dynamic I've ever seen. They're teenagers they’re gonna do things wrong (Makoto asking Haru to race him was also EXTREMELY fucked up, and we didn't even get an apology for that; the show literally just forgot it happened) but they need to be able to stumble and fall and make mistakes without the fear that the other will lash out like Rin or become withdrawn like Ikuya.
Haru has had such a bad experience racing a friend before, and he lost Rin bc of it, and Makoto is infinitely more important and losing him is Haru's biggest fear. Yet when Makoto asked, he put aside his own feelings and fears and pain, and put Makoto's feelings first. So why wouldn't Makoto, after the fight, put aside his own for Haru's sake? When he knows better than anyone how sorry Haru's gonna be bc he knows Haru better than himself?
Basically where i agree with needing more, a better apology where Haru apologises specifically for the words he chose and the hurt they intended to cause, i don't think Makoto shouldn't have gone to the airport or been angrier and not forgiven him until Haru apologised properly bc then how is he any different to anyone else is Haru's life? The whole apeal of makoharu is their unbreakable bond and selfless love, and if they don't have that, if they don't love each other unconditionally, if they don't understand why the other lashed out or did something awful (be it the fireworks scene or the race), if they're not there for each other through every bad thing in life then what's the point?
#like if i wanted makoto be the kind of person who stayed angry until he got a decent apology or some kind of resolution I'd ship rh 😂#makoharu#anon#ask#ask games
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🌙 hi y'all! april is pretty much over—i'm a bit late this month but here is a list of all the incredible fics i read over the last month. i can vouch for each one of them, they are all incredible!
🌙 reminder: some of these stories are 18+, so if you are a minor, please don't interact with them! respecting boundaries is important. please also remember to show your support to your favorite fic writers and REBLOG their work! likes are great but reblogs are what keep us going and motivate us to write more stories! one click of a button truly means the world to us.
🌙 catch up with last month's reading list!
☁ the vampire diaries/the originals
↠ breakfast in bed by @theeoriginals
[lucien castle x reader, one shot, fluff] this was the first fic i've ever read for lucien and it actually made me not hate his guts lmao, so cute but still keeping with the essence of his character!! 💖
↠ tranquil by @seraphictrash
[elijah mikaelson x reader, one shot, angst] literally made me cry, was not expecting this fic to be what it was, it's horribly sad but beautiful and just written so, so well.
↠ take me by the heart, take me by the hand by @iliveiloveiwrite
[elijah mikaelson x reader, one shot, fluff] ahh i really loved this one!! i love a good soulmate au and millie delivered hard 😌 she never misses y'all
↠ emptiness of the heart by @imgoingtofreakoutnow
[elijah mikaelson x reader, one shot, angst] made me want to unalive myself. so sad. please just read, i cannot talk about this fic again.
↠ a life without you by @xxwritemeastoryxx
[eventual elijah mikaelson x reader, series] i am so incredibly excited for this series especially bc i've never seen this specific au done before for elijah? and ahhh dom's series always slap hard so i just know it's going to be awesome (while you're at it pls check out her extensive masterlist she is so talented!!)
↠ starved by @nikmikaelsonswife
[klaus mikaelson x reader, one shot, smut] sweet lord this was so, so sexy 🥵 klaus in rut— GIVE IT TO ME!!!!
↠ turn me or leave me by @malfoys-demigod
[elijah mikaelson x reader, one shot, angst] this one was :( made me so upset lmao, hit me right in the heart :(
↠ stefan helps you with a panic attack by @auroracalisto
[stefan salvatore, drabble] i had to include this on here bc reading it was such a comfort to me and i just wanted to share that with anyone who might need it 💕
↠ like i'm gonna lose you by @hellotvshowtrash
[elijah mikaelson x reader, one shot, angst] literally obliterated my heart pls 😭 so beautifully written and tragic.
↠ favorite city, favorite day by @malfoys-demigod
[elijah mikaelson x reader, one shot, fluff] absolutely adorable,
↠ gestures by @tweedlydumbtweedlydoo
[elijah mikaelson x reader, one shot, fluff] elijah is such a cutie in this one—pls read if you enjoy the 'two idiots in love' trope 😌
↠ kick ass by @biisexualemma
[kol mikaelson x reader, one shot, fluff (?)] SO CUTE I YELLED!!! kol is such a sweetheart (when he's not being a pain) and this fic just made me fall in love with him a little bit??
☁ marvel cinematic universe
↠ persephone's symphony by @dizzydancingdreamer
[bucky barnes x reader, series] whenever a new chapter comes out it is the highlight of my day. i love this series more than i can express, it is actually so good and masterfully written and i will keep shouting about this until y'all give it the attention it deserves. READ.
↠ it's messy inside, let me take your coat by @divine-mistake
[bucky barnes x reader, one shot, smut] this one took me on a flipping roller coaster of emotions, but the ending had me melting 🥺
↠ between metal and flesh by @thatweirdoleigh
[bucky barnes x reader, one shot, whump (?)] this hurts my heart but in the best way 🥺 very painful but also soft and sweet 💞
↠ the four times bucky tries to tell you he loves you and the one time he does by @hellotvshowtrash
[bucky barnes x reader, one shot, fluff] so fucking cute oh my god makes me yearn so hard for a shy nervous bucky 😭 one of your best works!! 💗
↠ career day by @alittlebitofwords
[bucky barnes x reader, one shot, fluff] one of the sweetest things i've ever read 😭 in this house we adore dad!bucky and ahhh this was just so adorable!!! 💓
↠ security deposit by @sventeen-daybreak
[bucky barnes x reader, one shot, smut] neighbour!bucky owns my ass, this was so good, loved their relationship and how organic it all was!! incredible 💗
↠ baby blues & tattoos by @angeli-marco-writes
[stephen strange x reader, one shot, smut] i have now re-read this fic 3 times and i am still not over it—your writing style is so good and your characterization of stephen is so spot on 💞
↠ spellbound by @boop-le-snoot
[stephen strange x reader, one shot, smut] have also read this around 3 times now and am still not over it (how starved of content are us stephen fans lmao) — immaculate smut and build up to the smut as well!! 💓
↠ my darling, what did you expect? by @tripleyeeet
[helmut zemo x reader, one shot, angst] makes me wanna unalive myself SFKHSH jk but no this just makes me want to punch zemo and also dom him (maybe both at the same time?)
↠ sam wilson nsfw alphabet by @divine-mistake
[sam wilson x reader, headcanon, smut] yes divine is on this list again. this is like the best sam smut i've read and it wasnt even like. in the form of a full fic. the power you hold, deadly.
↠ 'till death blooms us art by @divine-mistake
[sam wilson x reader, one shot, angst with a happy ending] yes it's this woman again shfshk i can't help that she's so talented. this is an actual masterpiece. so beautiful in its imagery and comparisons, an absolute must read!! 💗
☁ miscellaneous
↠ do what you please to me, i won't resist by @cloudystevie
[andy barber x reader, one shot, smut] literally my entire fantasy in one fic—this is so filthy but so GOOD yknow. jasmeen never misses with the daddy andy content 😌
↠ little red riding hood by @latenitewolves
[peter hale x reader, one shot, smut] one of the first fics i ever read on the hellsite—read it again and was just as amazed, it's still hot as fuck 🥴
↠ passenger seat by @thatslikely
[stiles stilinski x reader, one shot, fluff] so cute its actually insane, fast food and jeep dates with stiles is such a dream 🥺
and that's it for this month! thank you to everyone here for sharing your stories with us! the world is so much better with wonderful fanfiction authors like yourselves in it. always immensely grateful to all of you xx tay 💞
#elijahs-wife reading list#april reading list#again a huge thank you and i love you to all the writers here!!#and to the readers remember to reblog the fics you like!!#also it is very very clear which characters i am biased towards lmaoooo#pls let me know if any links are broken!!!
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