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skitskatdacat63 · 5 months

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Fernando Alonso & His Relationship With Cards

I'm sure we're all familar with the cards on the back of Fernando's Vegas GP helmet by now, but did you know his relationship with cards goes a lot deeper?

I. Magic Tricks

You've probably seen or heard someone at least mention Fernando's propensity for card tricks. As far as I can tell he was doing them(publically) as far back as 2003 all the way to as recently as 2018. Even once performing a card trick, with a condom and a teddy bear(!??!?!??!!), in front of Valentino Rossi who said "How was that possible?"(x)

But how did this start? According to James Allen, "Fernando admits to having been heavily influenced by his grandfather, a mercurial figure, who taught him magic and card tricks, still one of his passions away from the race track."(x) And I'm not sure the validity of this one, because I couldn't find an actual source, but apparently he once said: "My parents are responsible for the two things I like doing most - driving and magic tricks. They bought me my first go-kart and a magician's kit."

In several interviews he described it as his hobby off track, and that he loved learning new tricks and surprising others in the garage with them! So clearly cards are pretty important to him both as a hobby but also to who he is as a person since they've been with him just as long as racing has.

II. Card Symbolism in His Helmets

This is the reason I originally made this post, but I thought I should also explain the origins of his card fascination first. As I said, we probably all remember the cards on the back of his helmet in Vegas, but did you know that wasn't the first time he had cards on the back of his helmet?

From 2008-2013, he used to have a pair of cards on the back of his helmets. The symbolisms of the cards themselves as well as the evolution of their design is really fascinating to me! Even more so with the recent development of the card choice in 2023.

Fernando said he wanted to reference his two titles in some way on the back of his helmet and after his friend sent him several ideas, he decided on having two cards(an ace of clubs and an ace of hearts, sometimes pictured with 05 and 06 on them as well), saying: "I picked the cloverleaf [the ace of clubs - Ed] to give me luck, but the only pity is that it doesn't have four leaves!"(X)

2008.

Here's the very first appearance of the cards! They're displayed flat, with the 05 and 06 clearly visible

2009.

Very similar to 2008, but with a slightly different design, and they're maybe a bit more straight with less shadow?

2010.

This is the first major change! I was sad they didn't have the years on them anymore, but then I realized they're sparkly to match with his signature lightning bolts on the top of the helmet!!

2011.

Honestly I'm still somewhat unsure if this is the actual 2011 helmet? It's pretty difficult to find clear photos of the back of helmets from older seasons. It's easiest to find them on replica sites or auction sites so I'm not 100%? But anyways, I like that this has the championship years on the underside of the cards

2012.

This is when I started getting weirdly emotional about the helmets. Do you see how they've progressed from being a centerpoint to being curled up and sad at the bottom of the helmet? Not listing the year anymore??

2013.

Same thoughts as 2012. And after this season, they cease to exist (just like his ferrari chair in the garage, WOAH CALLBACK), until cards make a reeappearance in his Vegas helmet, albeit in a different form

2013 Monaco(Honorable Mention):

For some reason 2013 helmets were easier to find proper pictures of, so I happened to witness this absolute beauty. The creativity of this helmet genuinely blows me away??? Wanting to keep the card motif, but making sure to incorporate it into the rest of the puzzle piece design?? Mwah! There was another special 2013 helmet but they didn't change the cards at all so I really applaud this one

2023 Las Vegas(The Return of The King):

The magnificent return! But look! The cards are different cards! Instead of being two aces, it's now an ace of hearts, a four of hearts(his driver number of course!) and, the, now iconic, representation of himself as a Joker. I literally could not believe my eyes when this helmet was released and I saw the Joker card, what a fucking silly old man....I really wonder if he felt nostalgic having cards on his helmet again or if he didn't think about it all and was just like, "ah cards because Vegas!!!"

III. Why Does This Matter?

*The rest of the post was factual, this is moreso my personal thoughts on the symbolism of the cards/designs

This post spawned from me recently watching the 2010 Bahrain gp and noticing "hey wait a minute...are those CARDS ON THE BACK OF HIS HELMET!?" It's a really tiny detail that's unfortunately covered up by the HANS device pretty much whenever he's wearing the helmet, so it's really difficult to spot! But I became fascinated with the fact that he had cards on his helmet before that recent helmet, and now here we are!

There's something to me about how the design of the cards evolves over the course of six seasons from the cards being front and center to being smaller, more folded up and closer to the bottom of the helmet. As I said, the 2012-2013 ones genuinely made me depressed because it feels, symbolically, like his hopes for getting another Ace are becoming more and more unlikely and falling away until they eventually fall falt and fade away entirely after 2013 and disappear for basically a decade.

But when they return? They're not the same cards! Instead of representing Fernando's championships, they now represent him as a person, displaying his driver number and his persona of being a Joker!! Though I do think it's interesting he happened to keep the Ace of Hearts, even though he talked more about the Ace of Clubs before. I'm not sure it's actually this deep in reality, but I like to think that it's him not letting his championships(and the lack thereof) define him, but rather letting who he is as a person shine and be the centerpoint instead! But on a sadder note, as @suzuki-ecstar said to me, maybe the Aces aren't there anymore because he's lost all hope for a chance at a third Ace entirely :(

#yes its finals week and im up to my eyes in coursework but instead decided to spend like 5 hours researching and writing this post #nah bcs i actually genuinely put more work into this then I think I have all semester dsfjdskjg #that thing about him using a condom and teddy bear in a magic trick genuinely had me crying with laugher. actual tears rolling down my face #<- HOW!?!? WHAT WAS THE TRICK?? its literally inconceivable to me what he did. oh if only there were pics UGH #anyways!! this post was a lot of fun to make!! i really really love the symbolism and design of helmets so this was a rly fun project #and i also went down a lot of rabbitholes while make this and saw many very weird articles from yore #i feel like i make an equal amnt of deranged posts abt seb and nando but i dont know why nando is gifted w all my well researched projects #<- i.e. chair post. that was the same level of research as this one but at least this one i could find actual sources about....#idk theres smth about the extremely long history of nando's history that evokes research posts like this KLAJSLSKDJ #theres just so much that i dont think I ever really see people discussing! so i must create.#haha what was that joke tag i wanted to make abt my researched posts? I think:#normal posts that catie normally makes in a normal fashion #<- one day ill go back and actually tag posts w that. bcs the amtn of research compared to my actual schoolwork is so unwell #fernando alonso #fa14 #f1 #formula 1 #catie.rambling.txt #we do a little bit of f1

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nerdpoe · 1 year

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Prefacing this with I haven't read the comics I just dip in and out like the canon is a pool and I'm trying to climb onto a pool floatie.

So y'all remember that weird fucked up mind game test Bruce pulled on Tim in the beginning of their bullshit? The real fucked up mindgame that made Tim quit being robin for a bit, before coming back and being all "I know I'm not gonna get an apology." And Bruce was all "good."?

What if Tim realized it for what it was.

Tim realizes the test is a test and decides to get back at Bruce in his own game.

Bruce wants to act like he doesn't care about him in an effort to protect himself from grief if another kid ends up dying? That's fine.

Bruce resorting to psychological mind games to drive Tim away from seeking any support??

Not cool.

Tim realizes, and pulls a Hamlet.

He likes Dick, doesn't want the man to go through what Bruce is about to, and goes to Bludhaven to directly tell Dick not to believe ANYTHING Batman says for a month if it relates to Tim, that he's gonna teach the old man a lesson.

Dicks like "uhhhhhhh okay? U know we can just tell him whatever he's done is wrong, right?"

And Tim's just "nah, I'm past that point. See u in like three weeks to a month. This conversation didn't happen."

He leaves a copy of Hamlet in his locker in the bat cave, the only clue he's gonna drop until all is said and done, and gets to work.

Pretends that Bruce's mind fuck has driven him mad, pretends that he's sneaking off to chase down leads, pretends to talk to people that aren't there, visits the joker just to learn how to mimic his laugh, (side bar, joker has no idea why the new robin is visiting him and disabling the cameras, or why the kid just copies what he says and when he laughs, but after like two weeks of it he may be slightly uncomfortable around the kid no lie) uses makeup to make his eye bags look worse and trashes his own house (his parents are gonna be so pissed but he's already angrier than they could ever hope to be, so they can suck it), acts so unhinged Bruce calls it off and tries to tell him the truth, only for Tim to pretend like he doesn't believe him and steal the robin uniform and run away, and then goes and sneaks away from his own house (he knew he was being watched) to a warehouse he predetermined with a conspiracy theory board and string in his room (he needs to make sure Bruce knows where Tim wants him to go) and the conspiracy theory is just an amalgamation of the bullshit Joker spews (again, joker is really confused by this strange child hero and very slightly unsettled, what the fuck Batman where the fuck did u get this robin, maybe return him to the robin store? This one's defunct), makes sure it's abandoned, and blows it to hell with the robin uniform inside

He knows Bruce will be too jarred, to lost in the major trauma buttons Tim is pushing with the warehouse explosion, to do a proper analysis. He KNOWS Bruce will want it done as quickly as possible, and try to bury Tim as quickly as he can. He knows his parents won't get any phone calls for at least a month.

Then he goes to ground for a week.

Walks back into the cave after that week, corners a grieving and broken Bruce, and asks him how he likes mind games now.

After all, it was just a TEST. There was no need to skip basic steps like DNA analysis, that's just SLOPPY Bruce.

Dick, who had been warned by Tim early on and kinda knew the kid was gonna pull a fast one of Bruce, had NO IDEA it was gonna be this depraved, and is very highly Shook. Nor did he realize Bruce had tried a mind game first, and is...disappointed but not surprised, really.

But holy shit Tim Bruce started at a 9 and you escalated to a goddamn 25.

Bruce, realizing that they may both be a bit fucked up, acquiesces to therapy. For all of them. Holy shit for all of them, because that was NOT a normal teenage response and he is beginning to sense some distinctly villainous red flags from this kid.

Next time the joker breaks out he flat out refuses to believe that Tim is a Robin, and joker is the one that starts the whole Cuckoo thing, and asks Batman if he's gonna send the kid to Arkham early or if this is a weird intervention program he's trying.

Then he tries to murder like fifty people cuz he's the motherfucking JOKER.

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askbloatedbellyblog · 5 months

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Ron Kamonohashi's Forbidden Deductions Belly Sighting

So a great new series called Ron Kamonohashi's Forbidden Deductions (Though the other version of the title is Ron Kamonohashi: Deranged Detective which I think just sounds cooler) is a new anime based on the manga by Akira Amano. She's created some other great series like Reborn and élDLIVE and has done the designs for characters in Psycho Pass. But this marks at least the third time that series she's associated with have had great belly content like here and here.

Ron Kamonohashi is a disgraced detective, forbidden from actually solving crimes due to an incident in his past. He uses his friend and police officer Totomaru Isshiki to help him solve crimes for...reasons.

Anyway, Ron loves brown sugar syrup and here he is after he ate extremely well at a buffet. It's even canon to the manga too!

I love this clip and it came out of nowhere. Plus I love him hola hooping and making himself sick here because he's a doof and had this on his wish list of things to do. He definitely should and probably could eat more. Since there's only one video per post I'll post this with the clip showing his spread right before too.

#The reasons are really good vore reasons #belly kink #stuffing #male stuffing #is this considered sickness or emeto?#Sick yes though he's just dumb #ron kamonohashi #Ron Kamononohash's Forbidden Deductions #Ron Kamonohashi: Deranged Detective #Feed him #He could eat enough to get stuck in that hola hoop #It sounds like he could have more #I know a spoiler that makes it sound like his food coma was unnatural so he could have more #burp #there's a small burp in the manga panel #burp kink #Man I also love that aerial view in the manga shot #bloated belly

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apparently-artless · 5 months

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expectation vs reality

#kamonohashi ron no kindan suiri #ron kamonohashi's forbidden deductions #ron kamonohashi deranged detective #krnksedit #isshiki totomaru #animeedit #anime gif #kamonohashironedit #artsgifs #i prefer reality tho he's so freaking adorable #i was really happy that enojun's his VA it added to his cuteness

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taxi-boi · 28 days

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the vees are so funny because you know val would say some aphobic shit like "what do you MEAN someone can form meaningful bonds that transcend sex and even romance but especially sex. what do you MEAN not everyones lives revolve around fucking and sucking or atleast like loving if your into that shit" (romance nuetral arospec allosexual)

meanwhile his on again off again boytoy fuckpartner vox has never truly been sexually attracted to anyone in his life (high libido sex positive ace demi-aro with a propensity for alterous attraction *cough one-sided radiostatic cough*)

and the both of them are in a commited platonic/business relationship with velvette who has absolutely no sexual or romantic interest in either of them (idk if shes a lesbian or aspec or bi and they're just not her type in that way; but its all the same result)

and yet none of them view their partnership as anything below or lesser than compared to the romantic and sexual relationships they do have. if not outright being more important than those (QPR-cule)

and ofcourse vox and vel will be standing right alongside valentino as he says this, nodding along without a hint of sarcasm or self awareness because they also genuinely think they believe the same thing.

and if you try to point this out to any of them (and somehow convince them that what they have going on is queer platonic and aspec in nature) they'll just be like "yeah but we're The Vees, we're overlords, we can just do whatever the Fuck (or lack there of) we want" and you know what they're right

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ratwithhands · 1 month

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Hi, Viewer Discretion:

This AU is about a nonexistent fictional mental health condition. There is imagery of straitjackets and other restraints, as well as mention of discrimination based off of health conditions. If you are uncomfortable with this content then please feel free to click off and enjoy something else. Thank you.

Dressing Sketch

Uniform Sketches

League Party sketch

Sketch dump for Battle Addict! This art has been gathering dust for a few months 😭 only just remembered to post it here.

These sketches are from Ver. 3 of Battle Addict, aka Battle Addict Twins, where both of them get the HCCM diagnosis.

The base idea for Battle Addict is that while most people enjoy Pokémon battling, there comes a certain point where one's love/obsession for battle starts bleeding into the rest of their life and becoming detrimental to their everyday life. This is usually called Combative Mania (CM), which is present in a large part of the population (40%-60%) hence why battling is so popular and so many different forms of it are made to keep people satisfied. The extreme form is Hyper-Competitive Combative Mania (HCCM), wherein a person spends so much time and energy for battles that it starts to affect their physical/mental health as well as their social life, since they neglect them in favour of their obsession.

Often what divides CM patients from HCCM patients is what they're willing to give up for battling and the extent of their knowledge regarding battles. CM patients usually only have a casual interest in battling or just enjoy the thrill of battling, but operate normally and have other interests outside of battle. They have basic to intermediate knowledge of battling, and can often partake in research or battles.

HCCM patients will often forgo food, water, sleep, school, work, and relationships in favour of researching and competing in battles. It is the only thing they find interest in and they devote most of their time towards it. Patients often memorize entire charts of statistics and different strategies and counterstrategies for battle, with different patients often having a certain subject they specialize in. Most patients with HCCM are unaware that they have it, they either assume that they have CM or that they are completely normal and just enjoy Pokémon battles. They often go into fields that work directly with researching Pokémon or battles, such as professors, scientists, gym leaders, elite four members, league workers, battle facility operators, and so on.

Ingo and Emmet do not know they have HCCM. They engage with battle and researching battle in a way that they think is typical for a hobbyist. Ingo tends to read on academic papers, textbooks, and study guides regarding the statistics and capabilities of Pokémon, whereas Emmet takes a more hands-on approach in studying Pokémon anatomy and battle strategy. Ingo often charts and studies natures, EVs, IVs, stat spreads, abilities, moves, and their properties. Emmet sketches anatomical diagrams and studies of Pokémon, including skeletal structure, musculature, organ systems, and physical appearance, highlighting pressure points in the body for executing the most damage and for keeping his own Pokémon protected. He also tends to read into psychological studies as well as conducting his own long term tests to predict a person's strategy in different situations. The two feed into each other's interests, teaching the other of their own discoveries and celebrating breakthroughs together. As a result, their total knowledge of battling is immense, which led to them becoming Subway Bosses straight out of college.

The two lived and worked fairly normally; they were very passionate about their work and it provided a way to sate their need for fighting on a regular basis, as well as giving them the space to experiment with different fighting styles and analyze others' strategies. Of course they still continue their studying outside of work, which often leads to them trying different methods or revisiting recorded battles to see how they could improve. The twins still believe their hours long discussions, piles of notes, and stacks of study materials littered around their house are perfectly fine, only stopping to reconsider after a comment from a coworker highlights how they must be crazy or incredibly disciplined to have as huge of a win : loss ratio as they do.

They end up taking the issue to a psychiatrist after dwelling on the idea for a few days, which is where they get diagnosed after a few tests and a description of their lifestyle and interests. Their case is considered moderate but could easily escalate into severe if left unchecked, though the main concern is whether this would make them a threat to other people due to their work and prominence. Obviously they don't want to lose their jobs, but this kind of thing could get them removed from the League Council if it got out, so they have to consider whether they share this information with their employers or not. Ingo thinks it'd be best to keep it under wraps, but Emmet fears that this could be used as blackmail and argues that they need to release this information themselves before someone else ruins their lives with it. Eventually they do take the diagnosis to the League Council and it gets out to the public.

Emmet takes the fall for Ingo, claiming his case is severe whereas Ingo's is mild so that the League Council will be more distracted with him to bother Ingo. That ends up with Emmet getting a new restraining uniform because the League no longer trusts him to handle himself in public based off his diagnosis. Neither of them are particularly pleased about this, but Emmet tells Ingo to look on the bright side. Emmet actually starts to find the jacket to be more of a little challenge than a hindrance, as it adds an extra level of difficulty to battles that he's been looking for, but Ingo still thinks it would be better if he hadn't had to wear it at all. This unfortunately extends to League parties where he has to be restrained to even be allowed entry, which he is much less happy about.

This post is getting ungodly long as it is but there's also a branch off of this concept where Ingo and Emmet land in Hisui together and Emmet's uniform looks like this. He deconstructed the uniform he was given to modify his jacket since by that point he had a bit of a sentimental connection to it and didn't want to just swap it out.

(Bonus fun fact: Ingo and Emmet decided to pull the biggest gag on the Pearl Clan when they first land by pretending to be one person under the alias Eki. Ingo is the polite one in the dark coat by day, and Emmet is the energetic one in the white coat by night. "Day Eki" is more popular with other Wardens and older clan members, whereas "Night Eki" is more popular with the village children and insomniacs.

The whole Warden Eki concept is technically its own AU in the background but it did originate from Battle Addict. Also I already drew Emmet in the Pearl Strait I can't take that back)

Anyways uhhh there's more let me see if I can condense it:

The twins went to a University specifically focused on battle (Champion's University), where they ended up studying subjects in their specific interests. Emmet took psychology of battle and Pokémon anatomy to learn about the weak points in trainers and Pokémon, and Ingo took general statistics and study of moves which are exactly what they sound like

The twins use the Vs Recorder all the time, both to track their own progress and to observe how passengers fight. It's often stuck to the glass windows to catch the Pokémon in the middle of the car, though they have considered buying Rotom Drones expressly for this purpose

Emmet actually has a stack of different studies on weak points in the human body but he doesn't share that with anyone, not even Ingo

Emmet's study of trainer psych has led to him often predicting tactics before they happen and dodging/countering them with his Pokémon. He often challenges himself to predict a person's team, moveset, and strategy based on appearance, gait, and body language, sharing his guesses with Ingo in case he makes any useful observations

Ingo and Emmet are possibly the first instance of causing "learned HCCM" in their Pokémon because after the training that they do together, the Pokémon have developed their own independent bloodlust and have started memorizing the move strategies that the twins have them use

Sometimes to celebrate fully completing a study on a particular set of Pokémon, the twins will eat one. This is mostly as a treat and an inside joke, but they will research what's in season/allowed and go hunt for one. Ingo is usually the one to catch it, and Emmet is the one to cook it. There's some really goofy shitposts about them going after pseudo-legendaries overseas, or Palkia's leg in Hisui

The twins can perform full medical care on any Pokémon and can often grind for hours nonstop since they can heal their teams themselves. They also save a lot on healing items this way

After releasing their diagnosis, the perception of the twins have gone in wildly different directions. Some people treat them as subhuman or as monsters, some people don't care, some people call them psycho yandere boys on twitter. Emmet tends to get more of the negative connotations, Ingo tends to get the more "positive" ones. Emmet also tends to get a lot of stares due to his restraint and status as a crazed fighter, which he pretends doesn't get to him

I think that's everything, I'm going to go collapse. Hope you guys enjoy 👍

#tw straitjacket #straitjacket #tw mental health #tw mental illness #submas #submas au #au #ingo #subway master ingo #ingo pokemon #nobori #emmet #subway master emmet #emmet pokemon #kudari #Version 1 is Emmet being absolutely deranged and Ingo getting him locked in the psych ward out of fear for his reputation and #Version 2 is Ingo being crazy and throwing Emmet under the bus when he almost gets discovered #for those who were wondering. Version 3 is best because they get to be obsessed and they drag each other further in together ♥#honestly this probably outranks Severed for my riskiest AU so I wonder how this is gonna turn out #hope this won't be the end of my career #anyways fun fact: this song is inspired by an old submas song!#Maniac Man led to me making the first version‚ then eventually I kept sketching until we got here #oh I just remembered‚ there's one scene from this AU that I think would be really funny to draw #The subway gets an overcrowding warning one day because they're holding a special event and passengers keep coming in while the twins are o #they were STARVED for battles that day though‚ so they call a Code Indigo and essentially turn the Multi lines into a 2 on 6 to get through #more passengers faster. They were absolutely exhausted by the end but damn if they didn't have fun messing around with the passengers

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ittyybittybaker · 6 months

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“neil is living in andrew’s walls” this is going to live in my brain forever now, much like neil in andrew’s walls,

listen i wrote those tags when i was half asleep and i thought that would be it but i am, in fact, still thinking about it !!!! i picture it like this

nicky and the twins live together in the columbia house (kevin technically doesn't live there but he's at their place like 5 nights a week so he might as well at this point)

the columbia house is OLD, like over 100 years so there's all sorts of weird crawl spaces and an attic that no one ever goes into

neil's on the run, jumps into an open window, and finds their crawl space

maybe he's injured and needs a place to lie low for a while

he heals, but their house is reasonably safe and he can steal food from their kitchen when no one's home and he's made a kind of comfy nest in the attic

his favorite spot tho is the crawl space behind andrew's room because nicky and aaron are too loud (nicky with talking to erik and aaron with katelyn/video games probably). andrew just listens to music and like. reads or something

as he heals, neil gets braver and starts to go out into the house more and more. maybe he cleans up the kitchen every now and then or he folds the towels they leave in the dryer as a thank you for their unknowing hospitality

(really he's just bored from being cooped up for so long, even if their house is the nicest place he's stayed in a long while.)

the cousins start to notice weird things are happening

nicky thinks the house is haunted

aaron thinks they're all just being forgetful about what they leave around the house

kevin thinks they need to check the carbon monoxide detector (he saw a documentary about it once and won't stop talking about it)

but andrew doesn't believe in the supernatural, and he also doesn't think it's a mass hallucination

he spends the most time at home, and he swears he's heard a muffle laugh or too when he makes fun of kevin

and what ghost changes the channel to espn

he swears he sees someone with striking blue eyes in the kitchen one night around 3am when he's getting a glass of water but when he turns on the light there's no one there and the doors are locked from the inside

kevin's not the only one who's seen a documentary, and andrew's just watched one about a man living in someone's walls

he mentions his theory one day at breakfast but everyone just thinks he's making fun of them, so he makes a plan to prove himself right

he researches into the history of the house and find the blueprints in some archival records, and sees the weird spaces in the walls (at the library of course, if there was someone living in his walls he wouldn't risk them seeing his investigating)

neil thought he was being careful, but he was getting comfortable there and he forgot to clean up his attic nest one day. he snuck out to grab some much needed supplies from the store and also to stretch his legs

this just so happens to be the day andrew goes investigating, and finds neil's hideaway

he's there waiting for neil when he returns

somehow neil convinces andrew to let him stay by saying "you've already taken in one stray after all (aka kevin) so why not another?"

andrew has to admit, he's got a point. and he really is very pretty

so andrew lets neil hideout in his room instead of in the crawl space behind the walls

andrew starts spending a lot more time in his room. the others hear strange noises and shuffling from behind the door, even when andrew isn't home

nicky and aaron think he's adopted a pet without telling them

(they're only half wrong)

yadda yadda andriel do their thing, they build trust by sharing secrets and truths and kisses, etc

andrew decides that neil is a permanent addition to his life, and he won't ever have to hide away again

one day nicky and aaron come home and andrew's cuddling on the couch with neil

"andrew, who is this"

"this is neil."

"cool ... where did he come from"

"he was living in the walls."

"... i'm sorry, what?"

"i was right. you both owe me $20"

"...i'm sorry, WHAT?"

"ssshhh, can you keep it down? he just fell asleep."

"Andrew. what the actual FUCK-"

unfortunately, andrew is no longer paying attention. he's much too busy playing with neil's hair as he dozes

and they all lived happily ever after and no body ever lived in the walls ever again

#nicky: i can't believe we thought he had a cat #kevin: yeah if anything he's more like a half feral raccoon #neil: HEY #andrew: no they're actually not wrong #idek what this is #it really got away from me 😅#i hope this was something like what you had in mind #please feel free to talk to me about the deranged shit in say in the tags #you could end up with gold like /THIS/#andreil #neil josten #andrew minyard #aftg #aftg shitpost #tag rambles #fic ideas #friend asks #alcego

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lunar-years · 11 months

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I am having so many Roy Kent thoughts this morning. Like, just how deeply lonely has that man been, for a very long time probably but especially the past year? He doesn't seem to have...friends? Like, sure, he has his fellow coaches, and he has Jamie. But it's not exactly like Ted's been in the correct headspace for most of the season to be pal-ing around with Roy in his free time, and Beard is friends with everyone and I expect has a million and one social commitments at all times, dictated first and foremost by Jane. We get the sense in the Chelsea episode of the sort of easy rep Roy had with the staff and community there, but also that he's cut himself off largely from all those good parts of his former life; clean break since the day he left. So by now, Roy's social life is fully just work and his 10 yr old niece...and eventually, Jamie Tartt.

Before he started training with Jamie, though, I fully think Roy was isolated and depressed as all hell, probably much more than he realized or ever acknowledged. Yes, he had the Club, and sometimes Phoebe in the evenings, but the rest of the time? Come home alone to his empty house that wasn't anything like Keeley's, and try to read his book, and make his dinner. Maybe watch some footie on the telly. Yoga once a week, if he's even still going, but in a way even that's lost its charm, because it's not like he can tell the mums anything, they don't even know who he really is! Try not to think too hard about how much he misses Keeley. Rinse & repeat. And the cycle becomes so unbearable that god, does he welcome training Jamie.

But even training Jamie, at first, is just...a way to extend work, isn't it? Work, work, work so he doesn't have to think about anything else, or linger on his own encroaching loneliness with the world. We don't see him and Jamie do anything but train until Amsterdam, which is the start of the breakthrough, and then until the very end of the season. Because Roy very stringently doesn't let Jamie into other parts of his life, even though he maybe (definitely) wants to. Jamie is part of work, not part of his personal life, and he forces himself to keep those rigid boxes up even after they've begun to bleed through. It's Jamie who has to push through them, slowly force his way in past Roy's defenses. And it's a good thing Jamie is a persistent little fucker, or Roy would well and truly have had no one.

And the whole time this is happening, Roy is forced to live with the fact that he's brought this all upon himself. He left Chelsea. He left Keeley. He's cut himself off from nearly every good thing in his life, and the worst part of all is, he can't stop doing it, even knowing it's made him miserable! even knowing he can't go on like this! He still can't bring himself to consciously allow Jamie fully into his life even as he increasingly relies on Jamie and their time together to keep him afloat. They're together all of the time, but for a long while, Roy won't even call him his friend.

Just...god, Roy is the most insane blender of fierce love and arrogance and protectiveness and repression and rage and self-hatred and self-sabotage and isolation and, and!! all the things he won't allow himself to have and all the people he won't allow to love him!! We wasted so much time on Shandy and Zava this season when we should have been cracking Roy Kent's skull open like a nut and examining every inch of his brain, me thinks.

#i need to write a character study of him asap tbh. no one sees how dark and dangerous and mysterious and repressed he is but me!#(jokes)#remember in Waterfalls when i wrote him comparing the end to his football career to an entire family perishing in a tragic plane crash?#in full seriousness?#yeah. that's the sort of deranged thinking I feel is happening in that man's brain at any point in time #he is soooooooooo!!!!!#also I genuinely think jamie saved him this season mentally. i really truly do.#ted lasso spoilers #roy kent #ted lasso meta #ted lasso

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