#he can be my malewife | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

wachinidad · 2 months

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Mihawk es de mis personajes favoritos de todos los tiempos y la idea de que sea "padre" me mata de amor

Por favor Oda, necesitamos que termine criando a S-Hawk y le de una vida mejor, la marina no sabe cuidar niños

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chaos0pikachu · 8 months

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where's my crackfic where sanji and zoro are constantly bickering and fighting over luffy until nami finally snaps and is like "you can both fuck him, he's rubber"

#one piece #one piece live action #sanlu #zolu #this is not a zosan safe space don't even try it wit me #this is zoro being hella jealous that sanji thought for half a second he knew what luffy needed #and sanji snapping back with don't hate a hot bitch who can cook i can be luffy's malewife #tell me it wouldn't be hilarious that zoro does wild ass crazy sword moves bc he knows luffy will be hella impressed #and then sanji cooks like an entire sea king to one up him #luffy getting spoiled is all i want for my twink pirate son okay #chaos pikachu speaks

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haliaiii · 2 months

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f&h 1 sketches

#d'arce girl pls u can do better he's not worth it #fear and hunger #f&h #funger #d'arce cataliss #enki ankarian #le’garde #ragnavaldr #my art #art #digital art #fanart #sketch #csp #haliai art #i like drawing enki bc i don't have to draw pretty anime boys and can draw him like the weird creature he is #he's not even babygirl or malewife #he's like #a hag

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oncelerswifesblog · 7 months

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I am not normal anyway

#how bad can i be #the lorax 2012 #the onceler #oncie #onceler fandom #the greedler #tumblr sexyman #lorax movie #biggering #greedler #he’s so cunty #my malewife #he’s so husband #i want him #i need him #why is he so hot #tumblr sexypeople

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eloise175 · 2 months

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Callisto trying to stop Penelope from leaving for the excavation sites and her honest reaction:

Callisto has malewife potential, the way he wanted to crown Penelope as the Emperor and he’d be her spouse sksksksks. He wanted to be her trophy husband lmao. This happened at some point, canon I was there, I was the pillow Callisto hid underneath the robes, pretty sure they had a conversation that went like this

Penelope: I’ll go—

Callisto: I’m pregnant.

Penelope: what.

Callisto: I’m with child, and it’s yours

Penelope:

Callisto:

Penelope: how.

Callisto: we didn’t use protection, didn’t you say you were going to get me pregnant if we were to get stuck in a closet? That was not a closet, but it most definitely worked. You can’t leave your pregnant spouse to be just like that.

Penelope: get rid of that pillow. now.

Callisto: this is OUR CHILD

Penelope: do not. I will deny your weekly visits.

Callisto: *throws away pillow all harumph harumph* fine! come here, we’re getting to work for the real deal since you’ve denied me this child

#this caused unnecessary mayhem with my moots #I had this idea in my head for quite a while but always forgot to make it #I can explain #i’m normal i promise #Callisto the malewife so true #Callisto in his trophy husband era #Penelope is flabbergasted #she knows he’s ‘peculiar’ but not like this #it’s fine she still loves him despite his silliness #penelope eckart x callisto regulus #penelope eckhart #penelope eckart #callisto regulus #villains are destined to die #vadd #vadd meme #(non official titles):#death is the only ending for a villainess #death is the only ending for the villainess

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lovesickeros · 1 year

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☆ puppy love

{☆} characters zhongli {☆} notes cult au, drabble, gender neutral reader {☆} warnings none {☆} word count 0.4k

He considers himself well collected - calm, even in the most perilous of dangers.

He could not, however, predict you guiding his head to your lap and running your hands through his hair. Every little praise beneath your breath, commenting on just how fluffy and soft his hair was, made him weak.

He was..not sure how to feel about it. Elated? Excited?

Perhaps this was simply a custom of yours? Which only made it all the more complicated. Was he meant to react in some way? You did not instruct him, beyond telling him to lay his head upon your lap and asking for permission to brush his hair.

"You're so pretty, Zhongli."

Ah. He felt his body tense - in surprise, he assumed. He..could not deny that it felt nice to be complimented like that, even if it did surprise him. And if it pleased you, then surely there would be no harm in allowing it? It took some amount of effort, but he relaxed his muscles, slumping against your lap, "Zhongli?"

He blinks. Once. Twice. Before hesitantly lifting his head, "Are you okay? You didn't pass out there, right?" His voice failed him them, throat suddenly dry. The concern on your face was..new. He did not have time to process why it felt nice to be worried over, before his cheeks are smushed between your hands.

"You're not sick, are you?"

"..No, Divine One."

He coughs into his hand, offering a small smile in hopes of easing your worry, but it only seems to make it worse. You scrutinize him, and suddenly he feels very small, despite being nearly double your height when he is not laying at your feet.

"I assure you, Divine One, I'm fine-"

"You better not be lying to me, Zhongli, or I'll.."

You puff out your cheeks, almost pouting as you lean down and burst out in sudden laughter. It, admittedly, makes him jump, but the sound of your genuine laughter..makes him unbearably soft.

"Hm..I'll tell Hu Tao about that time you got your horns stuck in the tree when you tried to climb it to get me some fruit."

He coughs, desperately hoping his embarrassment doesn't show on his face, "I assure you, Most Divine, that I would not lie to you. Ah..but, if you would, please do not tell the Director about that incident."

"Only if you let me pet your tail. Pretty please?"

He really was weak for you if your exaggerated puppy dog eyes made him weak in the knees, relenting and slinking the tail over your lap - it was worth it, at least, to see your eyes light up as you combed through the fur, brushing your fingers delicately across the scales.

He desperately hoped you would ignore the low rumbling purr in favor of focusing on his tail. He did not need further ammunition for the Director.

#sagau #genshin sagau #genshin impact sagau #self aware genshin #zhongli #sagau zhongli #fic tag #hands u pathetic malewife zhongli #he has 0 understanding of emotions and just kinda rolls with the vibe #touch starved puppy zhongli is smth that can be so personal #also hu tao def knows hes morax bc thats his grandchild and also she knows Too Much #also its v short but im sappy as hell and hes my first victim of the month #i just want to chew on him like a dog toy #comrade if ur reading this this fic is targeted and im inside ur walls open up

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diedoverahat · 6 months

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reading fanfics isn’t enough anymore i need mike schmidt oiled up chained to my bed.

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ra-vio · 6 months

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the minish cap turned 19 years old on Nov 4

#loz #legend of zelda #minish cap #toon link #link #I was busy that day. trying not to succumb to the thoughts #it was also my friend's birthday. he lives in japan so I celebrated on the 4th #im trying really hard to not fail my math course. i always take the worse math course on earth in fall #ironically the class im taking is the culmination of the other two worse math classes on earth before calc3. im not taking calc 3 #i will actually kermit. im so fucking tired. daylight savings ending is kicking my ass and its only day 3 #i've been trying to draw because i didnt draw all of october and im kinda losing my mind #and when im losing my mind i usually have some sort of buffer. its not re4 anymore cause i finished so it has to be drawing #im trying to practice the self care of doing my homework days in advance so i can get the weekends off. i hate it here. genuinely #i miss re4 so bad. i miss my wife. i miss my malewife. i miss luis #i forgot to say something about the art. i love the minish cap. its what my username is based on #my other username. not ra-vio. we know what that's based off #wow the colors look weird on pc

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smokbeast · 4 months

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🎄 soma and Fang?

Lil sillies in their holiday getups!

#Drew this a while back to practice human fang but forgot to post IM SO SORRY #I will reply asks slowly when I can!#but fang struggles sm putting clothes on soma she has no concept of it and it’s hard for him sometimes when it’s cold or something #HES A GOOD MALEWIFE #art #my art #my ocs #fang #soma #Horror fang sans #human horror sans #froggy mail time

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pencilofawesomeness · 21 days

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I was so caught up in the euphoria of making shit up, I forgot I wasn't uncontested. Wild that canon exists and is ongoing. Wild.

#this can to applicable to so much but its jjk #the new issue leaks reminded me that my initial headcanon is looking to be correct #even though I ignored every implication of it when I dived into my new fic #i'm 45k deep sukuna is stuck with this backstory no matter what canon says #but #jjk spoilers #ill tag that so my blabbing doesn't ruin anything #i DID forget it was implied he had a brother #completely forgot #i gave him nameless siblings to kill but I very much forgot that canon bit #hm maybe whatever they throw out me this weekend will not change anything #also Jin I put too much effort into this loving malewife he's mine now #i did always think he was related somehow because of resemblance #but I was so lost in the fanfic sauce it was unimportant #eh its an au anyways #i'll subject yall to it soon enough #just had to meme and make fun of myself for a sec

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flamingfalcon3 · 6 months

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Nina: “Would you still love me if I was a worm?”

Fabian, with zero hesitation: “Of course! I would build you a little home in a jar. With a little house. And I would talk to you everyday :)”

#house of anubis #fabina #nina x fabian #nina martin #fabian rutter #I will make posts about the rest of the sibuna swuad eventually cuz I love them all but these two own my heart #I love a good girlboss/malewife ship what can I say #also this is very much related to my au where Nina is transformed into a falcon and Fabian makes the sibuna squad build perches everywhere #like he builds a perch at her spot at the dinner table and everything #my obsession with birds started from animorphs so that’s why I’m like this btw #I just finally found a show where transforming someone into a bird makes sense in the plot

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aeroblossom · 5 months

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i acknowledge tartaglia's misdeeds (he has never done anything wrong ever) and his flaws (he has none) he's a morally grey character (he's a little red fluffy fox in a little red scarf)

#wdym thats not literally my malewife #i can accept him as he is #i can make him worse even #my babygirl #tartaglia #childe #🏷

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deafknell · 11 months

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They'd be the best worsties of all time I like to think

#rezero #re:zero #anastasia hoshin #otto suwen #They would shittalk Russell so hard #Then try to scam each other until one of them gets shooed away by their malewife #'Anastasia says I can make it big if I invest in these monkey images'#'No Natsuki san This isnt a scam this time look at the chart of Etherium prices I can make all my oil money back'#Subaru then has to beg Ana to stop sending business deals in his husbands DMs #He cant afford rent anymore

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ultravioart · 1 year

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roughing out ideas for a "goth/punk chick" disguise that peepers wears so he isn't shot on sight by Dominator lol

#woy #dominion au #commander peepers #ultravioart #I think the upper right gets at a more neutral design which i like #probably different shoes tho idk #my art #rough concepts are rough concepts #dressing up as a cheerleader worked on hater so dressing up as a punk girl should work on dominator right? right????#Dominator can tell something is off with this 'cherry bomb' chick but she thinks its hilarious so she goes along with it #when she learns it's not just any watchdog but PEEPERS she nearly looses it #I can't decide if dee would be angry or burst out laughing at the cartoonishly pathetic attempt to impress her #because what the fuck dude lol #who does that #(Peepers does. he's desperate enough.)#(And not in a romantic way he's desperate to save the galaxy/hater from dominator's wrath)#(malewifeing his way into her friendzone and taking her down from the inside so maybe she doesn't obliterate everything.)#(and okay maybe it's a little payback on Hater for choosing Wander and good guy nonsense over Peepers and the path of evil)#but yeah dom and peepers are strictly platonic and are the WLW / MLM solidarity we deserve #lmafo #'The gal pals' more like THE MAL PALS #hehehoho

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oncelerswifesblog · 8 months

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fr

#how bad can i be #oncie #the lorax 2012 #the onceler #the greedler #lorax movie #tumblr sexyman #biggering #onceler fandom #greedler #i love him so much #he’s my little guy #my malewife #he’s so handsome #he’s so babygirl

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staggersz · 7 months

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taps mic

I LOVE TALKING ABOUT MY AU SO IM GONNA TALK ABOUT WHO CAN COOK AND WHO CANT

Finney can cook. With Terrence being sometimes black out drunk, he basically taught himself how to make food for him and his sister. Finney sometimes pulls out his mom’s old cookbook to try and get a reminisce of her and make a nice dinner or breakfast.

Robin can cook. He’s probably one of the best out of the 6 of them. His mom taught him all the tricks and recipes she knew, and when she passed on, Robin’s uncle stepped up to teach him more. Robin also has his mom’s cookbook, which is jam packed with so many recipes for food and treats.

Bruce can not cook for shit, to be honest! He’s okay at making breakfast, but when it comes to anything else that involves a pan, a pot, or an oven/stove, he is completely helpless. Usually this means he just eats cereal for breakfast and orders food for him and Amy if their parents aren’t home for dinner.

Vance can cook! Whenever he had to go to his dad’s, he knew his dad wouldn’t cook a thing for him, so Vance made food for himself 99% of the time. When he went back to his mom’s though, she taught him to cook things and actually took care of him. Vance makes Griffin food when their mom is caught up with a late shift. Vance of course makes food for Bruce since he loves him. Vance earns the title of malewife /hj

Billy can’t really cook that much. SOMEHOW he knows how to make an apple pie without messing it up. Everything else he makes burns a lot though. His family got take out a lot or ate TV dinners, so they only ate homemade food like 3 days a week. After the whole basement fiasco though, he ended up eating homemade food more often since he goes to Griffin’s house a lot.

Griffin can cook. He isn’t that experienced, but he can make a killer plate of pesto pasta. Griffin’s vegetarian, and he grew up eating basically zero processed food, so when he makes stuff, his food is healthy and stuff. He forgot how to make a lot of stuff after being in the basement for almost 3 years, basically almost a 1000 days, but his mom taught him recipes again when he got home. He’ll still make non-vegetarian meals when someone wants food that has meat in it.

walks off stage

#tbp fandom #tbp #the black phone #let me have fun making headcanons #this is for my story #can i get a witness?#cigaw #finney blake #robin arellano #bruce yamada #vance hopper #billy showalter #griffin stagg #tbp headcanons #griffin is a silly lil chef #bruce is the WORST at cooking #good thing he has his malewife bf vance haha #robin and finney cook together because they’re cuties

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