#hazy day zy
Text
“Oh, don’t you worry! I knew from the start! You always thought I was an utter mistake!”
“No- no, no, no, we never said anything like that-!” “Now, now, daycare attendant!”
“Lying is against the rules.”
#more passive aggressive shit starting totally not a self insert I swear shdgdjsh#bones of a rabbit art#Babbit the daycare rabbit#hazel the happy hare#hazy day zy#fnaf#fnaf oc#fnaf sun#oc x canon#doodle#sketch#cringe#catharsis#drawing slightly demented expressions is fun ok#anyway#throws myself down a well
311 notes
·
View notes
Text
Dear Slugass
Please do not take this as hate or an attack against you. I do not intend to lash out at you or make you feel bad about yourself. I just want to say this because I am aware of how your actions, even if they are out of the goodness of your heart, are having a negative effect on the Tumblr community that you may not have intended.
I just want to let you know that I have gained awareness on some of the things that you have done. I am aware that these things have made many people feel very uncomfortable.
For example, the whole "cr^zy/ins^ne is a slur" issue. I understand where you are coming from, and I understand fully why you want to spread awareness on this. However, the way you are doing so makes it seem much more hostile than I believe you intended (especially since some of your posts have a very angry tone to them), and a lot of the time, the people using these words are not doing so out of genuine malice or a need to discriminate and don't see these words as slurs. It gives off the impression that you are policing the language of others. Again, I understand why you are doing this and that you are passionate about this, but if you remember what happened with that musician who blocked you, you are doing the exact same thing that got you blocked by that person to other people, which makes it seem like you have not learned your lesson from the first time.
Another thing is that one comic you made where Usop calls Tubee a transphobic slur. Granted, it was censored and intended to dunk on transphobes, but since it's portrayed in a comical manner, it came across as insensitive and potentially triggering.
Third of all, in one of the posts about you, someone replied that they deleted their old account because you reblogged on of their posts because they said "that's cr^zy" about a plot twist in a series and you called them the r-slur? They said their memory of the event was a bit hazy, and I'm not sure if the story is fully accurate, but the idea that you, someone who claims to want to call out ableism, have responded to this using another very ableist slur is incredibly shocking. If this is true, that just makes it even more shocking, since it goes completely against your entire motivation.
As I have stated before, I do not intend to attack you. I am aware that you have mentioned in your bio that you have anger issues, so that may be playing a part in this. I want you to consider how you are treating the people on this site. Everyone on this site deserves to feel safe and comfortable, including you, so please, keep this in mind, and have a wonderful day, from one MHS fangirl to another.
For anyone else reading this: I know that you guys have been pretty good about this, but please: do not, under ANY circumstances, harass Slugass for any reason. While a lot of you guys can agree that she may not be the most savory person on this site, harassment will make the situation much worse than it needs to be. Thank you, and have a good one!
#mhs#midnight horror school#tw mention of abelism#tw mention of transphobia#try to keep this site a safe place for everyone!#♡#long post
12 notes
·
View notes
Text
🍻
Dear Reader,
It was an enjoyable Sunday, but as a result, I'm not feeling my best today. My stomach is particularly upset, likely due to the coffee I had last night.
To give you some context, my past week was eventful. We had company events, and then my brother's oathtaking. Also, early on that Sunday, I had a driving lesson. While I can drive, I still need to hone my parking skills. My instructor seemed so relaxed that he was on his cellphone while in the passenger seat. Later in the day, as I was working on my paper for my Technology Evaluation subject, I received an unexpected dinner invitation. Whenever a high school friend proposes a dinner in our group chat, it's usually more than just a meal.
The evening was hot but delightful. Initially, we planned to dine at Aplaya. We went to the place but later we opted for a change of venue. Running out of ideas, I suggested a chill spot where I once went with a guy I dated, his mother, and his two sisters. The amusing part was that I could only remember it as "The Rooftop" and insisted it was near Taytay. Qui even had to contact my former date to pinpoint the exact location. I defended my hazy memory by saying I was merely a passive passenger on that trip.
One of the funny problems we faced was that none of us had brought a car, so we relied on Grab. This became a topic of jest for over two hours, especially teasing Aciel who had decided against bringing cars due to parking concerns. As the night wore on, my friends encouraged me to start dating again. Qui remarked, "Maganda ka naman, Zy. Kumausap ka lang." Wes chimed in, "Oo nga, makikipagusap ka lang. Ano ba yan!" I laughed it off, explaining that I'm booked solid until May 2024. While I do have plans, the next person I date will be someone I take seriously. I'm looking for someone who understands my commitments and shares a "date-to-marry" mindset. I've grown weary of fleeting relationships.
Qui also playfully commented that I weigh more than I appear, drawing a comparison to Wes. Wes jokingly considered going on a strict diet after being called "chubbier" than me. It's a reminder that some comments are best left unsaid. LMAO!
The atmosphere became even livelier when Daniel arrived at midnight, especially since he had a car. One of his stories was about the time we went to a bar and a guy approached me to get to know me, but I avoided him. Dude, we couldn't stop laughing at those stories! Moreover, there were the drunk moments with Nica, Wes, Son, and Rhein from last year. Hahaha! And, of course, the never-ending talk about Qui and Daniel's Rated SPG experiences.
Oh, by the way, another amusing challenge we faced was the lack of money on GCash or cold cash. Fortunately, Daniel was our savior and settled the bill. HAHAHA!
To wrap up the evening, Daniel drove us all home. I cherish these casual catch-ups. It's a reminder of the simple joys of spending time with those who truly know and accept you.
0 notes
Text
Amytal Sodium + Mac
A MacGyver Fan-Fiction
By @emachinescat
@febuwhump day 8 - “hey, hey, this is no time to sleep”
Summary: An increasingly desperate Jack struggles to transport a drugged and barely coherent MacGyver to exfil before it’s too late.
Characters: Mac, Jack
Words: 1,898
TW: drugs
Keep reading here, or on AO3!
If you enjoy, please consider liking, commenting, or re-blogging! :)
Even though the exfil point was less than a mile from where Jack Dalton stood, it had never been farther. This day was rapidly reaching Cairo levels of suck.
Jack had arrived to rescue his missing partner after an op gone to hell to find the two, now very dead, domestic terrorists who’d taken Mac injecting some foreign substance into his bloodstream. Jack would later find out that it wasn’t the first dose they’d given him - that’s why Mac hadn’t had the opportunity to escape on his own.
Because whatever this stuff was, it messed him up.
The bodies of the terrorists had barely hit the floor when Jack was racing across the room to his friend. Mac had been tied to a sturdy, high-backed dining chair, slumped in his bonds. It took Jack two seconds to cut the duct tape on his partner's wrists and ankles, but Mac hadn’t even seemed to notice he was free. He was awake, but he was not there. His blue eyes had glazed over with a detached vagueness that sent fear sparking down Jack’s spine.
With great effort, Jack had managed to hoist a limp MacGyver to a facsimile of a standing position, and that movement had elicited some response, much to Jack’s enormous relief.
“J-Jack?” Jack fought the urge to cry at the sound of Mac’s voice, weak and lost and scared - it didn’t sound like his partner at all.
“I’m here, pal,” Jack said simply. “Let’s get you home.”
It was easier said than done.
Even with Jack supporting him, Mac couldn’t keep his feet under him for very long. He attacked his newest mission - getting to exfil without Jack having to carry him - with a determination that was one hundred percent on brand for Angus MacGyver, but determination could only get a person so far, especially when they had been drugged with what was most likely some dangerous cocktail of mind-altering drugs. Jack just hoped that whatever had been given to him, it wasn’t deadly.
“So, any idea what they pumped you full of in there, hoss?” Jack asked as he grabbed the back of Mac's belt to steady him for the umpteenth time. It didn’t help that the ground was steep and uneven with roots and rocks - these terrorists had set up shop in an retired, abandoned safe house used by the FBI in the mid-80s, which just so happened to be halfway up a mountain.
Mac’s answer, when it finally came, was not encouraging. It took him at least a full minute to understand and process Jack’s question, and then another full minute to formulate his response. Jack had already given up on the question, thinking that Mac either hadn’t heard him or hadn’t understood, but then Mac slurred, “Truth ssserum.”
Jack stopped moving for a second, pulling Mac to a halt next to him. It was mid-afternoon, yet already it seemed to be growing dark underneath the thick canopy high overhead. He studied his friend closely, taking in even in the dimness the flushed cheeks, sweat-beaded brow, and hazy eyes with anxiety pooling in his gut. “They wanted information?”
Mac nodded, a jerky, uncoordinated motion, and then he muttered, “Pr’bly something like Thiopental Sodium or Amytal Sodium …”
“So what you’re saying is that you’re just really salty right now, huh, kid?” Jack joked weakly, not knowing for sure what either of the drugs mentioned were, but knowing they couldn’t be good. He gripped Mac’s waist tighter as he lost his footing again, this time while standing still, and took on more of his partner's weight. It was a credit to how bad Mac felt that he didn’t protest being supported. He reached out his other hand and felt Mac’s head. It wasn’t hot, but it was reaching a level of warmth that didn’t set well with his overwatch.
“I think you’re getting a fever,” Jack remarked, trying to keep the worry out of his tone.
“Side effect of l’rge doses of Am’tal Sodium,” Mac explained.
Fear clawed at Jack’s chest. “Just how much of this stuff did they give you?” he demanded, even as he started moving again, now half-carrying, half-dragging a mostly limp Mac by his side. The blonde’s feet were barely moving anymore, his toes more often than not scraping uselessly against the loose dirt.
“Too much,” Mac supplied, very unhelpfully.
“Okay…” Jack breathed out slowly in an attempt to calm himself. “Well, what other side effects should we be looking out for? If they used it as truth serum, are you gonna be revealing all your deepest darkest secrets to me? If so, I’m game for a good round of truth or dare.”
“D’sn’t work like that,” Mac informed him, and Jack couldn’t help but crack a smile at the piece of Old Mac trying to shine through. “Truth serums are act--”
“Okay, I’m going to stop you right there, Einstein,” Jack interrupted. “I don’t think you’re up for a science lesson right now. Can you tell me what other symptoms I need to keep an eye out for?” By his best estimate, based on the map he’d checked right before he’d set out with a drugged Mac in tow, exfil was still quite a ways away. If they kept moving at this pace, they should definitely make it in time, but if Mac kept deteriorating, things would get much more complicated.
“Uh… fever,” said Mac, and Jack just grunted, not reminding him that that was the one they’d just talked about. “...confusion… I think? Headache…. Hallucinations, sometimes… anxiety… spasms ‘n diz-zy-ness--” he overpronounced the word like he was having to try extra hard to say it correctly, “--sleepiness, insomnia, vomiting, diarrhea, constipation--”
“Okay, okay, I think I get the picture,” Jack interrupted Mac’s breathless spurting of grim side effect after another. “Geez, you’re starting to sound like a commercial for Prozac or somethin’. How can it give you sleepiness and insomnia? That’s about as opposite as you can get.”
“Mmmm... depends on the person,” Mac said several long seconds later, his words sounding as if they were being pulled with great difficulty from deep within. Still moving, but slower now, Jack glanced over and saw that Mac’s eyelids were beginning to flutter, and suddenly all of Mac’s weight was on Jack. He stumbled, barely keeping them from taking a roll down a steep incline.
“Hey, hey,” Jack gently shook his friend, who stirred with a groan, “this is no time to sleep.”
“Tired,” said Mac simply.
“I know, bud, and I’m sorry, but I’ve got to get your scrawny ass out of these woods before we miss exfil, and I don’t know if I can carry you down this mountain. I need you to help me, even if it’s just a little, okay?” He paused, then added, “And anyway, you probably shouldn’t sleep until medical’s got a chance to look at you. It’s safer that way.”
Mac didn’t say anything, but he did make a valiant attempt to straighten up and bear some of his own weight, so Jack pressed on.
Five minutes later, the nervousness set in. Despite being exhausted and barely coherent, Mac gazed around furtively, whipped his head around at every snap of a twig, mumbled something about his skin crawling and chest hurting and he thought they were being followed. At one point, Mac tried to break away from Jack as if he were the enemy, and would have rolled down the rest of the mountain if Jack’s reflexes hadn’t been so finely tuned.
A short pause and a panic attack later, they were back on their way, Mac still shifty and scared but thankfully more docile. He nodded off again.
“Hey,” Jack reminded him with another jostle, “no sleeping, remember? Let’s get down this mountain first.”
Ten minutes after that, they had to stop for Mac to empty his stomach of everything he’d eaten in the past five years. Jack rubbed his back and offered soothing words as his partner hacked and gasped and sobbed breathlessly against the strain to his body, but there was no time for coddling after the fact. They were running out of time.
Mac really wanted to sleep after the toll that had taken on his system, but Jack prodded him awake, trying to distract him with mindless babble. The ground was slowly beginning to level out, and he could hear the chop of the helicopter blades several hundred yards away in a clearing at the base of the mountain - they were going to make it in time, if only just!
At this point, Mac had become so uncoordinated and woozy that he might as well have been asleep, as Jack was supporting him entirely. But still, every time his head dropped onto Jack’s shoulder or fell forward, Jack prodded him back to consciousness, desperate to keep his boy genius awake and semi-coherent, because what if he fell asleep and didn’t wake up again?
And then they were in the clearing, and Mac was trying to sleep again, and Jack shook him as the exfil team surged forward to put the fading kid on a stretcher. Mac blearily opened his eyes at the movement.
“Hey, Mac,’ Jack said softly as he kept pace with the stretcher with long strides. “Stay awake for a little longer for me, will ya? Just until we get in the air and the medics can take a good look at you.”
Mac studied his face with a serious, but baffled expression. Finally, he gave a tiny, clumsy nod right before he was lifted into the chopper.
“‘Kay, Dad,” he murmured, and Jack froze where he stood, heart pounding wildly in his chest. Mac had said that hallucinations were one of the side effects of whatever drug he thought he’d been given. Was Mac hallucinating now? Was he seeing his dad instead of Jack?
Or - and this idea was one that Jack found himself approaching shyly, as if afraid to acknowledge it in case it turned out not to be true - could it be that Mac’s defenses were down? Could it be that he saw Jack as a father figure, that maybe Jack had been able to fill in, in some small way, the void that James MacGyver had left when he’d abandoned his son?
“Dalton! We need to move!”
Jack shook himself out of his thoughts, swiped the back of his arm across his eyes, and followed Mac into the chopper. Medics were already examining him, and even though Jack was informed that they wouldn’t be able to know for sure what they were dealing with until they were back at Phoenix and could run more extensive tests, he was reassured that sleep was probably the best thing for Mac, now that his vitals were being closely monitored.
Jack sat down next to the stretcher, and grabbed one of the kid’s hands. To his surprise, Mac was still awake, barely clinging on to consciousness.
“Hey, man. You’re gonna get help real soon, okay?”
“Is it… ‘kay to sleep now?” Mac asked, his words falling over one another like someone tumbling in slow motion down the stairs.
Jack smiled warmly and brushed a strand of sweaty hair off of his kid’s forehead. “Yeah, son,” he said, not even realizing what he’d called Mac in this quiet moment - it just felt right. “Now, it’s time to sleep.”
#febuwhump#febuwhumpday8#macgyver#jack dalton#angus macgyver#season 2#drugged mac#mac whump#helicopter parent jack#jack as mac's father figure#friendship#brothers#truth serum#hey hey this is no time to sleep#sleepy mac#papa bear jack#fanfic#the good old days#tw drugs#some fluff too#worried jack#sick mac#macgyver 2016
21 notes
·
View notes
Text
Too Tense to Be Undone (1/5)
Too Tense to Be Undone (1/4) | Dan’s never had an orgasm before. Despite being in a relationship with his ex-girlfriend for three years, he’s just never been able to finish. The doctor’s don’t know what’s wrong with him, so Dan’s mostly put it out of his mind. Until his gap year, when he starts talking with AmazingPhil, and accidentally admits that he’s never come before. Phil’s happy to help with more than just convincing Dan to post YouTube videos, if Dan will just give him the chance. | Phan | Explicit | Slight Friends with Benefits, Pining, Eventual Smut, Very Explicit Smut, Dirty Talk, Flirting, Getting Together, 2009, Skype | 4,569 Words This Chapter
Intense thank you to @imnotinclinedtomaturity who has spent the last week editing fics for me because apparently I’m on a roll. Also for spurring me on when I got this idea out of nowhere (I’ll be honest, I saw this really cute porn video on my dash and I couldn’t help myself. It was supposed to be PWP I don’t know what happened). Also thank you to my followers on tumblr who kept encouraging me to go on while I screamed at them that the word length just kept growing.
I’ll be posting every other day, so expect to hear back from me with chapter 2 on Monday :) I’m still writing chapter 4 so uh, extra encouragement would be… appreciated.
Title from David Bowie’s song “Get Real”.
(ao3 link)
**
Dan wasn’t easy to please.
In fact, he was pretty sure that there was something wrong with him, because despite his young age when he and his girlfriend had first started hooking up, he’d never been able to come. Orgasms just didn’t happen for him. And soon after he’d get his girlfriend off, she’d moan about how it hurt for him to still be inside of her, and stare at his wet dick and frown at the very idea of sucking him off after he’d been inside of her.
It had sucked, to put it lightly.
Getting off seemed so distant, so unattainable, that Dan never managed. Everything, everything, fell short. His hand, his girlfriend’s mouth, the wet heat of her body… it all felt wonderful. But it was never enough. He was always left high and dry, unable to come, and with a sick feeling in his stomach that just ended up making him give up.
Sex was nice, sure, what with the way it made his body feel, but there was never that big ending that Dan had heard so much about. He could work himself up into a frenzy, and even recognized the way his body would start to tense, as if it wanted to finish. But nothing ever happened.
Instead, Dan was always left teetering on a precipice, balls drawn up to his body, tense and waiting, but nothing would happen. There was always a sensation of molten heat in his abdomen that drove him fucking crazy, but no matter how hard he chased his own high, or how fast he fucked his girlfriend, he never came.
So he gave it up for a lost cause, and mostly turned to sex for that flicker of pleasure, or the chance to be intimate with his girlfriend.
But then they broke up and Dan was left with… well, his hand. For a while, he tried. He tried it fast, he tried it slow, he tried fondling his balls while he stroked his cock, but it never finished
And there really was no starting point if it wouldn’t end.
So he stopped altogether. Sometimes, he’d wake up with a hard-on, and he’d rub it into the soft cotton of his duvet, but he never went further than the hazy sensation of drugged pleasure that came with it. Then, he usually took a shower and waited for his throbbing dick to calm down enough that it stopped pumping all of Dan’s blood supply down. It was never worth trying anything else.
So Dan was hard to please.
He was eighteen years old and had never experienced an orgasm, and he was fairly convinced he never would. He didn’t have erectile dysfunction; the doctors couldn’t figure out what was blocking his… release, and he was perfectly comfortable in the understanding that he was very much, bisexual thank you very much. So it wasn’t the fault of his ex-girlfriend that Dan hadn’t been able to come with her.
It was just. Well. Dan.
Unfortunately for him.
“It could just be a disorder,” the doctors had suggested after he turned 18 and they determined he’d matured enough that he, well, should have been able to finish. They’d thrown around a few names that Dan couldn’t remember if he tried, referring to situations where people couldn’t stop having orgasms, or were triggered by the simplest of things, in order to make Dan feel better about his problem, but. Well. At least those people could. He would take those problems over his any day. Dan was angry at first, but then he.
Sort of accepted it.
There was nothing else to do for it except keep trying, but Dan wasn’t willing to put himself through the agony of getting so, so close but not quite reaching that high, so he hoped maybe a partner in the future could help. Assuming he could find someone willing to put up with it, at least. He was certain he wouldn’t mind continuing to just get his partner off, but he’d kind of like some kind of reciprocation. An attempt, at least. Maybe.
If he was lucky enough.
Dan was on his gap year, though, and he wasn’t particularly eager to date any of the guys or girls from his hometown. Dating apps were gross and mostly searched for singles nearby anyway, not to mention the creepy married people looking for a discreet partner, so those were out too.
Dan tried not to think too much about his failed sex life, these days. Sometimes it just felt like a waste of time, when for all Dan knew, he was never reaching orgasm anyway. So he did his best to distract himself with other things, like watching youtube videos and working at the law firm his dad had gotten him a paid internship at.
It kind of sucked.
And was yet another reason Dan sometimes just didn’t bother thinking about sex. He had far more to worry about in his life than whether or not he was going to fucking orgasm ever. He had a future to think about - regardless of whether he wanted to or not.
The main thing was, Dan really, really, really didn’t want to be a lawyer, but he didn’t see any way out of it with his dad looming over him the way he did. One throwaway comment about going to school to be a lawyer, and now Dan seemed stuck in the decision.
God, sometimes he hated his dad.
There was one good thing in his life, though. .
AmazingPhil, Phil Lester of the youtube kingdom, was kind of sort of Dan’s friend.
Well, more than kind of sort of.
They had each other’s phone numbers and their personal skype usernames, and Phil treated Dan like a he was actually his friend, and not just another fan. They spent hours talking to each other, joking and teasing over twitter and dailybooth, and dropping hints to the rest of the world that they maybe, sort of were into each other.
Which was, unfortunately, not true.
On Dan’s end at least.
He didn’t know about Phil’s end. They didn’t talk about it. They just flirted, and joked, and messed around. But mostly, they were just friends. Good friends. Best friends, even, if Dan had a say. Phil was the kind of person Dan could see himself knowing for the rest of his life, and the four year age gap didn’t even phase him.
In fact, it kind of excited him. Not that that was a particularly useful emotion in Dan’s life. It wasn’t as if he could actually do anything with the erections that he could get from just looking at Phil’s face sometimes, let alone the dreams he had. And yet they happened anyway. It was sort of embarrassing, but he supposed it would have been even more so if Dan had actually wanked off to the guy.
No. Instead, he didn’t wank off at all. He wasn’t really sure what was more embarrassing in the end.
Anyway, Dan more than kind of wanted to get into Phil’s pants, but they’d never even met in real life, so he didn’t think that was exactly the most plausible possibility in the world. Besides, like he’d said, he really didn’t have any idea of Phil’s true feelings. The guy was a fucking enigma, insanely good at hiding his feelings, and yet managed to be true to himself all at the same time.
In fact, when Dan spoke with Phil, he often found himself forgetting that he was talking to AmazingPhil, because despite being a similar guy, the Phil Lester that Dan spoke to was far more toned down and amazing than the persona he put on the for the camera (not that camera Phil wasn’t amazing too, just, in a different way. An impossible way).
Phil Lester was just kind of… Quirky. Crazy. Funny. Smart. And sexy. Sexy as all fucking hell.
Basically, he was the perfect package, and if Dan lived any closer, he probably would have jumped him the first time he’d seen him (okay, maybe like, the second, but the point remained). Being his friend was good too. Dan enjoyed that. He enjoyed having someone listen to him wallow while being happy to talk to him about his passions, including youtube and Dan’s very persistent desire to become a youtuber himself.
It was just nice. It was nice to have a friend like this. It was nice to know someone who was happy to help him, and didn’t make Dan feel like he was being a burden. And it was nice to have someone to combat the negative voice of Dan’s dad in his head.
It would be even nicer to put Phil’s focus to another task, but…
Dan shook his head. He couldn’t keep thinking about things like that. It got him… physically interested, and then it usually took like a good fifteen minutes (or longer, depending just how interested he got) to make his boner calm down. Besides, he was on a skype call with Phil, and he’d much rather focus on the sound of his best friend’s voice than on the pressing feeling between his legs.
“So I’ve been thinking,” Phil said, “You know, about you posting youtube videos?”
Dan mumbled something that sounded vaguely like an affirmative, because for all of his bravado, he really wasn’t all that confident. In fact, Dan could be pretty insecure at times, and when it came to youtube, he was… well, at his lowest point.
Or, he had been.
Phil had definitely helped him work out of that hole, at least a little bit. Dan had filmed a couple videos already, and he had footage that Phil thought was hilarious, but, well, he hadn’t exactly edited it together or bothered making an introduction video.
“Don’t get too excited, Dan, we’re only talking about you becoming internet famous over here,” Phil teased.
“Shut up!” Dan snorted. He gave Phil his best unamused look, but he couldn’t help bursting into a fond smile at the way Phil looked back at him. It wasn’t all about Phil’s sex appeal, okay, Dan had a massive crush on the guy too. He was sweet, and he had this way of looking at Dan that made Dan feel like he was on top of the fucking world. “What have you been thinking, then?” Dan asked, because it didn’t seem like Phil was going to continue unless Dan actively chose to take part in this conversation.
“Oh, you know,” Phil hummed, “I was thinking maybe you could film an intro this weekend? Maybe that’ll encourage you to actually start editing your other videos, so you can get them up.”
The words made Dan shrink back a little. Youtube was like, a thing he really wanted and he talked about it with Phil because he knew that Phil would take him more seriously than his parents or his other friends, but, well. Actually posting a video and just talking about it were two very different things.
Filming an introduction to his channel meant this whole thing was real, and once Dan had put his face out there, he was terrified to give it up as a failure. He didn’t need everyone he knew telling him they were right.
“Yeah,” Dan said, noncommittedly.
Phil instantly frowned.
“I really don’t understand what you’re so afraid of. You’re really attractive and funny. That’s like, the perfect package for youtube,” Phil explained. “Besides, you’ve shown me your skits! They’re really good, and you look fucking edible in them, if you know what I mean,” Phil added with a wink.
The expression was a little awkward. Phil had trouble blinking one eye and not two, but it still sent a chill up Dan’s spine - and a surge of blood down to his groin. Never let it be said that he did not have the body of an 18 year old, because he sure as hell did. He got hard just as easy and just as often as anyone else he knew, he just… couldn’t do anything about it, that’s all.
The idea of Phil finding him edible was mouth watering, though.
Dan’s cheeks coloured red.
“Stop,” he moaned, “you’re flattering me!” With a dramatic hand to his head, Dan pretended to fall backwards in a swoon, which successfully broke the tension between him and Phil. They laughed and the world felt normal again - except for Dan’s dick, because that sure as hell hadn’t gotten the memo to calm the fuck down.
“No, but seriously, Dan,” Phil said again, “What’s up with you? I really think you should do it. If I was able to get popular on this platform, I don’t see why you can’t.”
“Yeah, but you’re like. Phil. You’re this super tall, sexy guy with dreamy blue eyes and a good sense of humor. Have you seen yourself in the toxic video? You can’t tell me you weren’t trying to be provocative. How many girls wanted to fuck you after that, hmm? I could never be as good as you.”
Dan didn’t intend to go down the self-deprecating route, but it was kind of his signature thing to do.
Thankfully, Phil wasn’t one to put up with it.
“I might have gotten a few offers. The only ones I took even half seriously were the guys, though,” Phil said, offering Dan another awkward double wink. “But no, really, Dan. Have you looked in a mirror? If you think I’m sexy, I don’t know what to say to you. The amount of followers you have on dailybooth from your nakedbooths alone could far outshine mine if you let it build up long enough.”
The words sent another little zing through Dan. If he was being honest, he knew he was attractive. He’d been a ladies man in secondary school, and even though his last relationship had survived the last three years of school, he’d still known he was well attractive. It was just… Phil was so many leagues ahead of Dan already that it didn’t feel comparable.
Rather than letting Phil dominate the conversation any longer, Dan smirked at his friend.
“Been having a look at my nakedbooths, hmm?”
“You know I have been. How I am I supposed to resist?”
And here came the part of the night that Dan always particularly enjoyed: the cocky flirting. The cocky flirting that Dan was never sure whether it was real or not. Phil always got this intense expression on his face, like he knew he could get anyone that he wanted. He was so confident that it put Dan to shame, and Dan had always thought he was a pretty confident guy. Phil, though - Phil was not afraid to show himself off, and to make it very clear what he wanted.
Phil was no virgin, that much Dan knew. In fact, Phil had admitted that at one point in his life, he’d been a little bit of a slut. He’d learned a lot during his masters program. And it wasn’t all academic.
“How many times have you jacked off to my pictures?” Dan teased.
Phil didn’t back down, not even for a second.
“Too many times to count. My favorite is how innocent you look with all those stuffed animals posed around your body. Don’t leave much to the imagination, do you?”
Dan laughed, his voice husky, and his cock suddenly very interested in the topic of their conversation.
Dan was mostly just glad he’d managed to divert Phil’s attention away from Dan posting his first video.
“I like to let people know what they’d be waking up next too.”
Phil’s eyes, impossibly, grew darker.
“Oh yeah? Is that why you hide the part we all want to see the most? To make sure we take you to bed?”
“Maybe,” Dan teased.
“God, I bet you look beautiful when you’re worked up,” Phil whispered. His voice had gone all deep, and it made Dan’s mouth feel insanely dry.
Was it getting hot in here? Maybe. Dan should open a window. He didn’t want to move from his bed.
“Wouldn’t you like to know.”
“I would,” Phil returned, eyes glittering. His mouth tilted up into his trademark smirk that always made Dan wonder if he was just another game to Phil. “I’d love to get you under me, see how you fall apart. I bet you look amazing when you come.”
The words made Dan’s eyes close, made him feel wistful, lusting for something he knew he couldn’t achieve. It caused his hands to twitch at his sides, itching to relieve some of the tension of his cock. His laptop was thankfully perched on top of his crotch, so Phil could have no idea what kind of effect he was having on Dan, but Dan wanted nothing more than to move it so he could get a hand on his dick.
Not that it would do anything. But still. Phil’s words made him feel so fucking good…
To be taken care of, by anyone, for however long they were willing. God, that was the dream.
“Do you, Dan?” Phil asked, pulling Dan from his thoughts.
His eyes popped open, and he stared quizzically at Phil.
“Do I what?”
“Look hot as fuck when you come.”
The question knocked the breath out of Dan, because he didn’t know. But the way the words curled off of Phil’s tongue made him desperate for the answer. He wanted to fall apart under Phil’s talented hands, and finally know what he was like when he finished. He’d never fucked another man, but he’d love to, he’d love to find out how different it was than being with a girl, and to see if he liked having a cock in his ass. He had a feeling he would.
What would it be like to get fucked? Dan was just horny enough to want to know.
His cheeks went dark red as he contemplated how to answer the question.
Finally, he went with the truth.
“I don’t know.”
Phil seemed to misunderstand what Dan meant, though. His smirk only seemed to grow, and he looked at Dan like he wanted to eat him.
“How would you like to find out?”
Dan had to bite his tongue to prevent himself from making a noise, but he let his hips roll a little, adjusting to the new pressure in his pajama pants. This wasn’t territory Dan was exactly… comfortable with.
It felt like lying, to go along with this, and pretend his issue with never finishing didn’t exist. But he wanted to. God, did he want to.
“Uhm, I don’t know,” Dan whispered.
“I could show you, if you wanted. Get you off over skype, talk you off the edge, and record it all for you,” Phil continued, voice low and rough. The words washed over Dan, and it all sounded so good, except -
Except -
“I’ve never had an orgasm,” Dan blurted out. His face, already impossibly red, seemed to grow redder.
On the other side of Dan’s screen, Phil’s eyes had gone wide. In fact, Phil’s entire posture had changed. He’d gone from complete and utter confidence to outright confusion, shifting backwards so he wasn’t quite so close to his own camera, and staring at Dan as if he’d grown two heads.
“You’ve never had an orgasm?”
Dan laughed nervously. “No, I haven’t.”
Phil didn’t seem to know what else to say. He was so taken aback that Dan thought he might actually be uncomfortable with the whole situation. Dan’s own mind was whirling. He couldn’t believe that he’d even said that to Phil, let alone that Phil had offered to get him off over skype before he’d said it. They’d flirted hardcore before, and Dan had joked about his nakedbooths plenty of times, but they’d never stepped into this realm before.
Phil asked Dan provocative questions, but Dan always brushed them off.
Until today.
Eventually, Phil managed to pull himself back together. His eyes softened, and his shoulders relaxed as he offered Dan a sympathetic look.
Dan didn’t want pity. He found himself shrinking back.
“I thought you had a girlfriend for three years? Are you not… I mean. Are you still a virgin?” Phil asked, words completely matter of fact. “I’m really sorry if I made you uncomfortable Dan. I didn’t even think, I just assumed that -”
“I’m not a virgin,” Dan muttered, cutting Phil off before he could bury them both into an even deeper hole. “I’ve had sex before. Plenty. With my ex-girlfriend. I’ve just... never had an orgasm,” he admitted.
Phil didn’t seem to know what to say to that, either. Dan was starting to get used to that. He hadn’t told very many people that he couldn’t orgasm, but they all seemed to react in the exact same way.
Speechlessness.
Dan sighed, and reached up to card a hand through his hair. He pushed his fringe back, and then immediately fumbled to brush it back into place, already self-conscious enough without his hair being a mess.
Finally, Phil spoke again.
“Are you… do you just not… do you have erectile dysfunction or something?”
“Phil!” Dan reprimanded. “I don’t have erectile dysfunction. I’m not 80! What the fuck!?”
“I’m sorry! I just don’t understand! How have you had sex before and not…”
“I don’t know,” Dan finally admitted, defeated. “The doctor’s don’t either. I’m perfectly healthy, there doesn’t seem to be anything wrong with me, and I can get hard as easily as anyone else. I just. Can’t finish,” Dan finished lamely.
It was an embarrassing thing to talk about, especially to someone Dan was kind of, sort of, incredibly interested in. Besides, Dan still didn’t know if Phil was into him or not. They’d gone way past the normal boundaries tonight, but for all Dan knew, Phil just wanted to fuck him. Not be in a relationship with him.
Dan desperately wanted more. He’d never been a one night stand kind of guy. He might be a flirt, sure. But he was possessive as all hell and got jealous easily. Dan didn’t share well. At the end of the day, he was committed, and he always expected his partner to be committed as well.
That was part of why Dan and his ex-girlfriend had broken it off. She’d found someone else, and, well. Dan couldn’t really blame her.
She’d found it upsetting that Dan couldn’t finish with her, despite the fact that she so rarely tried to help him actually do so.
So Dan was a little bitter towards his ex. So what. He was allowed to be. She’d technically cheated on him, after all.
Phil, for his part, seemed a little lost for words. Dan stared at him, terrified of how he was going to react. “Oh,” Phil finally replied. “I mean. Have you tried?”
“What the fuck, Phil?” Dan snapped. “What kind of a question is that!? Of course I’ve tried!” he complained. “I know how to jack off, asshat. I just can’t get anywhere with it.”
Dan was borderline fuming now. Phil was looking at Dan like he was a science experiment, and it was pissing him off. First, his girlfriend had left him because he couldn’t orgasm, and now his best friend was acting like Dan simply hadn’t put in enough effort or something.
“Well,” Phil said, after another moment of peering at Dan. He leaned in slowly to his webcam, and suddenly that same dark, sexy look was back on his face. “Maybe you just haven’t tried hard enough.”
“Fuck you!” Dan snarled, “Who are you to say I haven’t -”
“Dan,” Phil said, effectively cutting him off. Dan’s chest was too tight for this. He could feel himself heaving, and it wasn’t from arousal anymore. It was anger.
Phil didn’t seem to understand just how livid he’d made Dan. He just continued to smirk at Dan with that same look on his face that he’d had when he’d suggested filming Dan pleasuring himself.
“Maybe I phrased that wrong. I think, maybe, you just haven’t had the right attention paid to you. I’m sure you could orgasm, given the right partner,” he purred.
Dan was speechless. He could still feel his body thrumming with furious energy, and he still kind of wanted to tell Phil off for presuming to know Dan’s body better than he knew his own, but. Well. He hadn’t quite been expecting Phil to say that.
Dan licked his lips. “What do you mean?”
“I mean,” Phil said, that same intense look on his face. “That I think I might be able to help you with your little problem.”
Dan’s cheeks were flushed red again. Despite the outrage he could still feel simmering under the surface, his dick was perking back up. That should have annoyed Dan, but Phil looked so sexy that he was used to it by now. He’d just have to will it away later…
“Look, Dan. You’re hot, and I am very much so attracted to you,” Phil explained, “And if you seem to have a bit of trouble finishing, I can promise you that I wouldn’t give up after just one try. In fact, I don’t think I could ever stop pleasuring you, given the chance,” he added, practically purring once again.
His eyes were so dark that Dan was dizzy with it, and his voice a perfect balance between gravelly and in control, so that Phil sounded like the goddamn sex god that he undoubtedly was. Dan couldn’t deny that he was curious
“Phil…” he whispered.
“Dan. I want you. And if you’ll give me the chance, I think I can guarantee you an orgasm. You were talking about coming to meet me, so how about in two weeks. My parents will be away, and you and I… we can work on your little problem together.”
Dan’s mouth was like a fucking desert. Everything Phil was offering sounded so fucking good, but -
But Dan wanted more than just a one night stand.
He was paralyzed with indecision as Phil drew back from his webcam. The smirk didn’t leave Phil’s face, but he did look a little flushed, and possibly a little turned on.
Dan didn’t know how to answer.
“Think about it. And Dan,” Phil added, “I hope you’ll post that intro video soon. I’d hate to have you star in a collab with me only to have no channel to direct your new followers to.”
And with that, Phil winked, waved goodbye to Dan, and hung up their skype call.
That little shit.
Dan was left staring at a white screen with a few links and hasty conversations in his and Phil’s chat, and nothing else.
His heart was racing with a combination of anger and arousal. Dan didn’t know which to focus on. He was too busy fumbling with the offer Phil had just given him.
Phil’s parents were going out of town, and he was inviting Dan to come over. There was no way he could have been joking about fucking Dan if he’d planned it so they’d be home all alone. And on top of that, Phil had mentioned a collab. Fuck. Dan’s head was spinning.
Had all of this really happened?
He didn’t know, but he wanted to find out.
Besides, with a promise like that, how could Dan refuse?
464 notes
·
View notes
Photo
"PHONE[Y] LAND!" a poem a.k.a.: "Don't Let 'Em Put You In A Box!" 30 May 2019 (Thursday)
Why-do-you-think-they-call-a-phone-"a phone," derived-from-the-same-word-as
P H O N Y ?!
'Cause-it's-not-real! com-munication! It's-so-fake, just-"a-bunch-o'-bloody-baloney,"
'Cause-you ain't around the one you've found, on-the-phone whom you should be- with!
The device was developed MILLENIA-AGO In-vented by-a "SITH,"*
'Twas-invented-by-a-Lord, who-could-well-afford to-visit-in-laws-and-"acquaints,"
But (s)he was lazy, with-temper'ment-"hazy," and-had-to "bind" many-saints,
Who did object, in a profound way - to such a hideous device!
A Sith Lord named COMMO, who lounged in pajam[o], was heading all this vice!
(S)he hyp-notized this world, with phones and radios and, of course, The King! TV,
And computer gizmos (to dull the mind)! It-was-done pro-gres-sive-ly!
The strategy was simple (and well conceived) get-us-away from: The Gift of Touch,
For everyone knows you need (at least) 12 hugs/day - or life ain't very much!
Without these "contacts," you-can't-really-survive in any-kind-of reasonable fashion!
We're crazy, it's true, but-now-such-phone-use has-taken-away-real-passion,
Like: when you touch them savory "g-spots," which-make sensitive-folk say: "GEE!"
And now people-are ever so-much-more depressed and cray-hay-hay - hay - - - zy!
I-usually-"run-around:" Trying-to-help, and-crying: "Come-on! Snap-out-of-it!"
I'll-sometimes-grab-Lucy, either by her caboose-y or-by her j - - - y t - t,
Yelling: "Milk! Sweet Milk! Lucy! Wake up!" and-the-poor-dear won't even notice!!
We're-so ALL-in-THE-BOX, we-can't-even-smell-our-socks,** and-JUST-wonder
IF-THERE'S SOMETHING YOU "WROTE-US!"
fin <3
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sNACNewvhq0
* - An ancient, extraterrestrial group of supernatural monks, who strive for universal domination! I have been diligently repulsing their advances for, almost, forever, having saved this small "solar system" numerous times and never really being properly compensated for my efforts. Your tax-free donations and contributions can be sent to my D. P. O. address: 777 Llama Square, #69, Baglung, 33300 D. P. O. Nepal. Namaste!
** - or The Roses!
0 notes
Text
To Watch From Afar- Zyglavis
Zyglavis let you go. To protect your life he would distance himself from you and watch you from afar. Through the clear waters of the reflecting pool would the strict yet kind god watch over you for all your days. Though to him it was anything but clear, your hazy reflection would appear on the surface always blurred by his lonely, bitter tears as he yearned for you, wishing he could reach out and pull you to him but all his wishes were nothing but empty dreams never to be fulfilled.
You still remember the day like it only just happened… The day your life was over and you had to say farewell to the man you loved, for all eternity.
“Zyglavis? What’s wrong…?” You anxiously approached the serious god as he gazed out his window. For some reason he seemed to be avoiding looking at you.
“I’m sorry.” That was all he said as you neared him. His words left you feeling more confused.
“Why? You haven’t done any-” As you reached out to touch him he swiftly dodged your hand while still looking away, “Zyglavis? You are worrying me…” Tears started to prick at your eyes as you were overcome by this foreboding sense of doom, like something terrible was about to befall you.
“___.” Zyglavis finally turned to look at you. When you saw the look in his eyes it was like a dagger straight through your heart, you had never seen him look so lost and troubled before. He looked to be in anguish. “We can’t be together. It seems our fate was to always be apart.” Zyglavis said, his words were gentle but very serious.
“What? I don’t understand.” You were desperate. You couldn’t let things just end like this. Why did you have to break up?
“If we stay together you will surely die. Even I can’t promise I will always be able to protect you.” Zyglavis said, his eyes shaking and his lips trembling, “You are more important to me than life itself and someone I can not bear to lose but for that same very reason I must let you go so you will be safe.”
“No…!” Your burst out into tears and vigorously shook your head in refusal, “I don’t care about what happens to me as long as I am with you!”
“___.” Zyglavis gently grabbed your shoulders, “I understand but I won’t change my mind. …Certain gods are against us being together. I just can’t risk anything happening to you.” Zyglavis pleaded with you to understand but no matter what he said you still wanted to be with him.
Zyglavis sighed, “If only I was born a human or you a goddess then this wouldn’t be so impossibly difficult… I have never felt so torn with myself. The thought of leaving you is agonizing but the thought of losing you is a feeling worse than death itself.” It was hard to see Zyglavis in so much pain as he made his decision. The usual stoic and stern god was an emotional mess before you.
“___.” With eyes full of anguish and love, Zyglavis gently cupped your cheek as he looked at you, “Thank you. I will never forget our time together nor the feelings you shared with me. It was thanks to you I learned to believe in humans once more and I swear I will continue to believe in them for all my days.”
“Zy…gla..vis…” You struggled to speak through your tears. Your chest squeezed painfully, you thought you might suffocate under the weight of it all.
“I will always love you. Even when we are apart our hearts will always be connected. There will never go a day where I am not watching over you so please find happiness here on earth. …Find your happiness without me.” Zyglavis said, a single tear falling from his eyes as he gently kisses you one last time, “I will always be wishing for your happiness.”
~~~
That was the last time you saw him. Oh how you wished you knew how he was. How was he coping? You hoped he was okay as you certainly weren’t. You could never stop thinking about him and your heart yearned to see him again. You wished every night to see him but your wishes always went unanswered but you never gave up. The one thing you wanted more than anything was to be with him, even if it put your life at risk. You loved him with your whole heart and would do so for the rest of your life.
~~
“Zig. Haven’t you tortured yourself enough with this foolishness? You are only hurting yourself…” Scorpio said to Zyglavis as he watched you in the reflecting pool.
“None of that matters. I promised I will watch over her until she draws her final breath and even after then I will continue to love her for all eternity.” Zyglavis responded making Scorpio sigh.
“Don’t you know she has been wishing to see you constantly? Her wishes are so powerful it’s overwhelming for the wish gods.” Scorpio said.
“I know… It seems we both have wishes that can never be granted. Even so… I will always wish to be with her one more time.” Zyglavis sighed, “If only I was a human, if only…” Zyglavis continued to spend the rest of his days gazing at the reflecting pool and thinking about nothing but you all while cursing his godhood and making wishes that will never be heard.
41 notes
·
View notes
Text
*gives my weird shit post meme oc an edgy origin story*
FazCo Management: Okay so some parents have safety concerns about how many kids are being watched by just two robots so now we have to bring in a third one so they’ll stfu
Management: *rushes through the creation process, basically shrugging and saying ‘good enough’ at its beta stage* *drop it off in the daycare after maybe two days of testing, not giving any of the now Three Robots any actual explanation or introduction to one another* *gives each a good star for a job well done and calls it a day*
Sun and Moon, now saddled with what is basically the newest new hire in the history of inexperienced employees, with no warning and no idea what to do with them at all:
Hazel, who has No Idea how to be a polite or reasonable person in the slightest, hitting the ground running in all the wrong directions: WOW your place is like noisy and just full of stuff, huh! Like damn y’all live like this!
Sun, taking that personally: Would you perchance like to be given exactly four cubic feet of space as far away from us as possible?
Hazel: Would I!!!!
Hazel, forty five days later, still standing in that four cubic feet space, having not talked to another living creature in fourteen days: Boy it sure is fun watching Sun and Moon have fun with all those kids from wayyyy over here!
Hazel:
Hazel:
Hazel: Somehow I understand what being a deflated balloon feels like now! That’s weird!
At some point in the future, when Hazel has realized that they have been sidelined and actively ignored for basically her whole life,
Hazel: Today I shall wake up and choose violence nuisance
#hazel the happy hare#hazy day zy#hazel the daycare hare#fnaf oc#shitpost oc#why am I like this#oc lore#fnaf x oc#oc x canon#the sad part is that Hazel still rlly wants attention from Sun n Moon#even when she’s literally trying to make their life harder LMAO#is it bc she has a crush or bc they are the closest thing to roommates she has#who knows! not me!#doodles#sketches#bones of a rabbit art#Babbit the daycare rabbit
379 notes
·
View notes
Text
Mad as a March hare is what you are!- sun probably idk
#bones of a rabbit art#hazel the daycare hare#hazy day zy#hazel the happy hare#fnaf oc#fnaf sb oc#canon x oc#self insert x canon#doodles#uncanny#mad as a hare in March#I kinda wanna draw hazel with afton virus interacting with sun/moon who also have virus#but it would be. bad#very problematic of her unu#idk I do love some catharsis but I’m afraid of freakin ppl out#this time not with violence but with implications#action in inaction type thing#idk anyway bye
269 notes
·
View notes
Text
Remember that shitpost daycare animatronic oc I cursed the world with a while ago. Yeah she’s got lore AND a name now because, unfortunately, I have no self control
#hazel the happy hare#hazy day-zy#fnaf dca oc#fnaf sb oc#fnaf daycare oc#shitpost oc#meme oc#Babbit the daycare rabbit#doodles#sketches#fnaf#silly bullshit#self insert#social anxiety#socially awkward#is she trying her best? absolutely not.#is she a menace on purpose? like 90% of the time
218 notes
·
View notes
Last Seen Blogs
sindriastwinwarriorsmoved
Attila and Emese
kiwisodaz
Tweet Tweet On The Street!
ritterton
Ritterton's Likings
joushutcherson
BBY BOYS
smilingcrittersthingig
Critter AU