#gonna put warnings when need be
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FOREWARNING FOR GROSS-OUT SKIN CLOSEUP SHIT DON'T YELL AT ME FOR SHOWING YOU has anyone else gotten this really weird phenomenon on youtube. I swear every algorithm on every website is actively and purposely worse now. Where you'll be scrolling through vids after searching for something (I was looking at crochet stuff) and SANDWICHED IN THE MIDDLE OF ACTUAL SEARCH RESULTS... YOU KNOW. LIKE THINGS RELEVANT TO THE KEYWORDS I TYPED
are a couple of completely out of left field SHOCK VALUE VIDS. like to intentionally be alarming. drama vids and things you're enticed to click on bc they're upsetting, and deep deep closeups on zits. what the fuck is going on. Sandwiched between videos about GRANNY SQUARES. crack? is it crack we're smoking????
#are you telling me I can search for crochet patterns and be fed videos of pimple popping and news about anorexic influencers?#THESE ARE NOT ADS!!!! they're just IN THERE. I have ublock I've got all that stuff. these are just completely irrelevant videos#in the search results after I typed like. granny square patterns. or something really basic like that#NASTY shit#and I know it's not the algorithm clocking me bc I can tell when they do that. but I hate hate hate pimple popping videos#so that's not gonna be it.#when mr. algorithm gets me I can smell it. because guess what. nail polish. it's always nail polish.#and I don't watch upsetting shit abt the starvation girl or anything either. and I don't follow drama clickbait channels#WHAT IS THIS. WHERE AM I.#why did they make me look at this!!!!#sergle.txt#you're not allowed to yell at me btw I gave you a warning. which was more than I got. we're in this together now.#i'm not sure what to tag this as bc if i tag it as body horror then ppl will bark at me bc zits are natural. is it natural to get#a camera this close to big irritated holes and boils on your face. lesions. cysts. is that natural. are we friends#do i need to be close enough to smell you. put my eyes directly into the holes in your face
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So umm... 👉👈 I may have actually be playing the Outlast Trials rather than just watching it on YouTube. Would anyone like to team up and show me the ropes?
I'm a cautious player, I made it through the tutorial only getting attacked during scripted sequences. I'm not really interested in speed running, I want to take my time, see the sights, listen to the characters ramble to themselves, but I do want to finish the story and not just fuck about 😅
I'm playing on the PS5 and I'm in the UK so presumably I'm on the European server. Message me and I'll share my username, but I need to warn you now that I've had it for years and it refers to a certain Wizarding book series. I want to change it, but I'm nervous given you can lose your freaking game library by changing your username on the PS network 😒 but please rest assured I'm no TERF. Any questions just drop me a message 🥰
#mod speaks#outlast trials#please i need some friends to come throw bottles at Coyle with me#idc if you stream the game or whatever but do warn me 😅#i wanna look at all the pretty environments that Red Barrels put so much work into#PS5#gonna find all those documents and propaganda posters#propaganda is when an English person has a good look at something#be warned#i will say “baby girl” about the most rancid of men#the outlast trials#bullying coyle is morally correct
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does anyone know where I can get a good portable charger? if I get from from amazon or smth is it gonna blow up?? should I just go to best buy?
#i dont need the best quality portable charger ever#cause i only need it for this one 18 hour trip#normally i would have access to a charger for a trip like that#post posting#i know my fear of things blowing up is unreasonable but when i was little i swear i heard my dad on the phone with some customer service#asking if his phone was gonna blow up cause it was old or he got some warning message or smth#and he also told me that if i put the batteries in something the wrong way it would explode#and ive also heard stories of peoples computer chargers catching fire and melting#i just really dont wanna get blown up on this field trip but i also need to be able to text my parents 😭
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:))))) hrgh
ok so not to get too venty on here but
i start my final quarter of college tomorrow w/ my senior film due in 2 months, and my neurologist just upped my steroid dosage which might result in new side effects (or maybe already has? the steroids have already been fucking with my vision but it seems a lil worse and now i think im having trouble falling asleep too) AND im gonna have to deal with infusions during this too :')
o(-< so hrghhhhhhh basically the next 10 weeks are about to be really stressful and i just wanna ask that everybody be patient/gentle with me
#ughhh im so nervous#my hearts gonna explode outta my chest bro OTL#im also trying very hard not to worry about my treatment progress#i trust my neurologist but it is becoming very difficult to leave every appointment with#'i was hoping we'd see more progress by now. im going to up the ante'#ive already progressed so far and would be beyond thrilled if this was the limit#but im scared that if it IS it's gonna take constant work to maintain it#i cant get infusions for the rest of my life#and like#ok so when i started the steroid#i had a bit of a backslide in progress at first#which really scared me#turns out thats normal!#but she didnt warn me#and it turns out. she didnt warn me because.#in the 2000 people she has prescribed this steroid to#i am the only person who had that happen on a dose less than 40mg#so! not normal actually!#and i know bodies are just weird sometimes but that combined with the fact that apparently my case is really stubborn...#o(-< im scared#and the classes i need to graduate arent offered in the summer so if i cant push through them with all of this going on i cant just#drop one then graduate then finish in summer (which they let you do)#puts my head in my hands
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am i so hard to care about?
#i need to vent and i know u guys cant stand me because i can feel it (and certainly from the anon hate) but i think im gonna have an ulcer#if i dont put this out somewhere#SH s*icide tw !!!!!#i need some advice or opinions because i feel like im losing it#i dont understand why my friends cant care about me#i know !!! i know i seem out of touch and insane because i say this so often and the question to someone reading would come natural: maybe#it is just ur perception…. maybe u suck ass as a friend too#and i do ponder about that!!!!!! i take those possibilities into consideration i do. and i genuinely dont think i suck as a friend. i always#check in. if they seem off i ask how they feel. i ask updates on their stuff. i dont think i deserve this tbh#but especially when i am struggling they just disappear#like even when i reach out and let them know im doing bad. they clearly read my measages and choose to ignore them#these are supposed to be my best friends#these days ive been so bad. and trigger warning again#i just feel so suicidal and i have been hurting myself in the desperate attempt to cope and manage these thoughts#and i dont tell them these things#i dont share the details because 1) it is too much to dump on someone and 2) they dont show any interest even on the surface level of my#problems so i just wouldnt tell them the deeper issues#i am just in so much pain. and i also feel a lot of anger because of their behavior. i feel so so hurt by it. so many years of this going on#of them just not even acknowledging my struggles while i was in the midst of them and trying still to support them and be there for e#whatever they had going on. and getting nothing in return#i hate that i feel so angry but i do. and ive been swallowing this anger and pain for so long i feel it eating my insides#even my therapist doesnt understand why i am friends with people that dont care about me#i dont know what i should do#i want to say something#actually i already talked about this to one of them one year ago exactly and i told her all these things and she just said she didnt know#why i was ignored. and then still kept being a part of it#the thing is i am so upset and my mental health is so so so bad. i am supposed to spend new years eve with them in two days but i dont know#how i can do that feeling like this#but if i speak to them about it i think it will also ruin the mood#if someone has any thoughts or advice it would be very welcome….
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#i have to say this somewhere or im gonna go crazy#so at a preschool. you HAVE to have one adult sitting at every table when kids are eating. and you also need a person in the hall#for kids getting their lunchboxes and going to the bathroom and shit ok. are you with me here. this makes sense#so today. my 2 coworkers had already taken the chairs bc i got caught up in the hall but i was so fucking hungry that i just ate standing u#which was fine. like i could just put my lunch down if someone needed my help and i Did that ok it was fine. no one was left alone#but later at SNACKTIME. it took me forever to get these 2 kids in the room and seated ready to eat & by the time i got in some kids were#already finished and ready to go to the playroom. so i was like ok i guess I'm not eating for the latter half of the day because they cant#be left alone. and my 2 coworkers at this point were sitting with the snackers and they looked fine so i looked after the Players#intermittently glancing to the snack tables to make sure everyone was fine mind you#So what happened here was.#There was a 20 second interval between the time i glanced up to see 2 adults at the snack table. And the time i glanced up to see#a completely unsupervised snack table. one kid STANDING UP ON THE TABLE blowing raspberries and pointing at the other kids#could not have been more than 20 or 30 seconds that i wasn't looking and NO ONE TOLD ME they were leaving the room#if i had been WARNED that they were leaving i would have prioritized the snackers and sat with them so no one choked and no one fucking#stood on the table#but they both just left for whatever reason without saying anything#and when i brought it up after school they were just like. well marty you were eating too much during lunch#next time you should eat before coming in to work so you can give the kids your full attention#??????? i already skipped a meal today for that exact reason?? how is it my fault that i don't want to starve?#am i actually in the wrong here because it's driving me FUCKING nuts. that was NOT a safe situation and it obviously can NOT happen again#but the issue was a lapse in communication not me wanting to eat food so i don't actually die#and those were two different times of day so they're not even relevant#obviously there are bigger issues in the world than this but i feel like throwing up over it. this was not my fault#I'm sorry that you guys can survive off of like 1 spoonful of granola and a single acai berry for the entire day but im not built like that
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piper is such an inherently fun character to think about for me.
especially during bw and his villain arc. ESPECIALLY when he's at he's peak villainy.
like YEAH he gets manipulated by team plasma into making him think people are out to ruin him and is believing in a false ideal... but he's still kind of a villain. moreso than n and hilda. like at least those two don't pretend to be people's friend nor does he try to harm them and ruin an entire wealth of childhood memories for said false ideal. he goes out of his way to throw hilbert to the wolves.
he is a victim... but just because he's a victim doesn't mean what he's done is ok.
like he is VERY self motivated in the end. he's hurting hilbert and bianca for the sake of HIS future, HIS feeling of fulfillment, HIS feeling of being alive. and like going as deep in this path as team plasma has lead him on it makes him feel so alive unlike he's ever felt before that he has. an evil villain laugh about it. when his true nature is revealed and he has his villain monologue (before the monologue about how much he hates hilbert)
He's BURNING alive compared to his ever desolate feeling of cold, empty, dead-ness.
and the fact that hilbert still loves him after everything he's done infuriates him!!! like it fills him with so much turmoil and rage it makes him see red and they INSTANTLY start a pokemon battle. i think his face would be one of those shots where the camera is just ultra focused on an anime characters eyes.
and he may try to write his wrongs but AGAIN. the damage he causes has been done. and at some point, he was willing to get even worse had it not been for the cruel wake up call given by Bianca, and of course, what happened to Hilbert.
he's just a fun guy to think of. especially when i think of what he'd be like as a villain and his true alliances gets revealed to bianca and hilbert.
#and this is how i excuse putting wolf in sheep's clothing in his playlist#Deceit so natural. But a wolf in sheep's clothing is more than a warning.#<- him#the entire chorus too. btw.#tell me how you're sleeping easy how you're only thinking of yourself.#Show me how you justify telling all your lies like second nature#karma's gonna come collect your debt.#<- yeah. him.#he's like a weird fusion of an ace attorney prosecutor and yugioh villain to me#if hilbert and cheren are phoenix and edgeworth [and also tgaa2 spoilers] coded#i need to figure out. which ygo protag rival duo they also fit best.#he's so fun to think about. boys when they're kind of evil.#(pushes him into a locker)#btw wolf in sheeps clothing is ALSO in the kris kawamoto playlist. cuz its the quintessential super evil backstabbing song.#cheren :handshakes: kris. backstabbing villains (they still would loathe each other though)#pokemashe#cheren piper
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Had a dream about Eliot finding a big abandoned library that a giant spider person has made into their home. the spider person was very not nice and the experience left Eliot afraid of spiders even though normally he likes them (the spider person was also in control of all the normal spiders that lived there or something)
#duck speaks#ocs#Eliot#there were other people who also found the library and sort hung around Eliot. but none that he knew already#and also I'm pretty sure they didn't make it out of there. so also none that he'd see again later#the only person who was another one of my ocs was Sage. and they showed up in sorta a flash forward thing#like. a scene that would happen a while after this#they were walking together somewhere and a spider was hanging down from a web in the path where in front of them#and Sage was about to tell Eliot to move it out of the way (put it in a bush or something) like he usually does#but Eliot jumped and looked all scared when he saw it#and Sage looked concerned and went '.. you ok bud?'#very compelling concept I think. Eliot solo adventure where he gets scared and experiences the horrors#at some parts of the dream I would even stop and think about how I could draw it out as a comic#I remember going 'oh we're gonna need to put a big arachniphobia warning at top of this one huh'#it's not even a comic normally.. it only exists in my head rn really
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my heart genuinely goes out to every black woman and woman adjacent black person who's hurt by episode 7 like i was by zheng being screwed over*.
white dude dumly outsmarting zheng is hurting me because she's the sole character that looks remotely like me. Seeing spanish jackie's bar exploded and that it implies she was foolish enough to accept a fucking grandfather clock from someone she cut the nose off of can't be the best feeling.
Idc if the next episode "fixes" things. The statement has been made and the betrayal has been commited.
Things can be mended but it sucks cus for once i let my guard down. I god forbid felt safe. I guess that teaches me a lesson.
"But that was just it - hate was exactly the right word. Hate is a force of attraction. Hate is just love with its back turned." -Terry pratchett
That is where i'm left with this show at this current time.
No i will not be taking constructive criticism from white people on this. Only voicing this so that anyone reading and is currently feeling isolated, doesn't feel alone. Cus i don't think many people will point this out.
And i swear to fucking god if any of you white saviour fucks try to twist my pain here into justifying sending hate to the writers or actors then you will get the most biting letter i am able to compose from me. Don't you fucking dare take my pain and try to use it just to get your hateful rocks off.
#ofmd#i am not black i just love olu/ctx for my pfp#but spanish jackie is the only rep black women have in this show so doing her dirty sends a message dude. whether you intend it or not#and why include such an important chinese woman if you're only gonna have her repeatedly get screwed over when she historically didn't get#screwed over once#i swear to god if anyone goes “it's not historically accurate” to excuse woc getting screwed over as if that's not a daily fucking reality#then you will be blocked and reported#not spoiler tagging this on purpose and not warning this on purpose. feel free to block me if you're a victim of this but if you're not a#victim/survivor of racism but wanna trigger warn racism cus it's “hard” for you then please block me as well#your energy is rancid in that case#ofmd essay#i guess#when i said i'm bad at essays i meant it/lh#the reason i'm putting this many caveats is because i've been on the internet for long fucking enough to see all this shit go down#it won't change that shit will go down#but i'd rather be able to just block than try to argue#also fine to reblog as long as you don't try to turn it into a crusade or a call to fucking hate actual people or to try and dehumanise poc#by acting like we're children incapable of defending ourselves or who need protecting#that's not activism either#it's just rude and a micro-agression
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have a horrible headache and usually headaches are a combo of things (esp not eating/sleeping enough) which could be the reason i have one today but. also i smoked thu which was 2 days ago and usually i get a headache 2 days after smoking. and im just. i already wrote a diary entry talking abt it and how i feel guilty and bad for like a million different reasons but now i'm also just incredibly frustrated w myself bc why do i do this!!!!!!!!!!!! i can go weeks and months w/o smoking i don't NEED to do this!!!!!
#smoking#tw smoking#havilah's thoughts#addiction#tw addiction#nicotine#like i feel like i Know that i can just not smoke idk why i sometimes do it anyway bc it's literally only negatives#i've never had a.... i guess a 'strong' smoking habit? like usually it is weeks and v often it is months btwn cigs#i just sometimes get mad and wanna do Smth that will make me feel more bad but also kinda better????????? it doesn't make sense i know#this time i felt Particularly guilty bc just a little bit ago i was hanging out w my friend and he hugged me and told me he's glad i haven'#been smoking a lot lately and a buncha nice things i'll keep to myself but. i just. and then i got home and had a letter from my grandma#that was so so sweet and my grandma used to smoke and she quit before i was born and she used to tell me when i was a kid how horrible it i#and now i have a headache and i /hate/ headaches and it felt dirty and i felt slimy for hiding it from my roommate n for feeling like i was#lying to ppl that care abt me#i know i felt calm too. i know it somewhat feels nice. the sensation is diff from anything else and i like it. i know i sometimes need to d#smth that feels. like. drastic and like it's gonna kill me w/o killing me#but it just. i KNOW that it's not worth it later!!!!!!! i know that i feel horrible and the negatives outweigh the positives by a lot!!!!!!#but i never throw away the pack. it's like. idk. idk what to do to just Not do it.#anyway uh. lemme put additional warnings for what i ended up saying in the tags#suicide#suicidal ideation#depression#i guess idk. just covering my bases i guess so ppl don't see smth they don't wanna see
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'im gonna sleep' he lied
#snap chats#i love making the main text Bullshit and then putting the actual post below. ive said this before but idc its my art#its like... the main text is the title and the tags is the actual article.... does that make sense#i should sleep my eyes are heavy but im being tormented by concepts i want to execute#gotta apologize for all the arasawa posting as of late but ive been enabled#tbh on the lowest of keys i did post bout them on occasion in the past but. but now it's feel-speed ahead#twt has been driving me insane so i just need to hop aboard me other boat yk what im saying... please say you do i refuse to elaborate#for the sake of the people i wont but man if you know you know#anyways. the actual meat of this text post See All That Preamble Shit is meant to deter people. it is a warning#'i am bring cringe down here do not look. wait for it to be art so it's harder to ignore'#'snap i thought you didnt like sharing things if you were gonna do something with it' ok well the delusions are strong tonight#and im too tired to do anything and ill prob be too brain dead to do anything tomorrow LET ME SPEAK#ok cringe time. i just think jo gradually accepting physical affection can be something so personal and good SUE. me.#and when i say 'gradually' it will be ten years before he accepts it and even so it'll be quietly#i think by his 20's hes beyond flinching/wincing at random contact- or at the very least he's very good at suppressing the reflex to#more so if its not something like a handshake- like just casual contact- i imagine he's more confused than anything#i had friends who were obsessed with like. hugs and holding hands and those things always had me like ???#i imagine Same Shit for him ☠️ 'this isnt a bad thing but this isnt something im familiar with What Is???? this feels weird.'#im gonna make myself throw up thinking anymore about this. i be making these hardened yakuza men sweet and sentimental#twitter really is decaying my brain....#let me be worse. cause i hope arakawa introducing that sort of physical affection rubs off on jo. no where near the same level as arakawa#but itd be SOO funny if like.. jo starts walking close enough to occasionally bump shoulders with him#i hope when arakawa starts nodding off in the car and ''''accidentally''' lays his head on his shoulder he stops tensing up#heaven forbid jo even rests his cheek against arakawa. id be ill#Let Me Clutch My Pearls For This One i hope when they hold hands jo starts to hold arakawa's a lil tighter than he used to#just very /very/ little things like that. very little things that'll still make me insane I'M DELU-LU TONIGHT SORRRYYYYY#expect more of this bullshit but. in art form in the future. whether it writing or drawing idk i just need it#i need it injected right into my veins its my weakness your honor TAKE ME AWAY i AM guilty for making the scary gangsters cute#ok im pissing off fr now bye.
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dentist office had the wrong address on file which is why i was never notified like fully their fault. but no they can’t do anything to remedy the situation 🥰
#personal#like i have enough for bills that and some extra fun money luckily it ain’t killing me#but seriously they fuck up from their side and ther like okay but ur gonna pay us our money right 🥺 and come back?#yes and no and tempted to rate a review about it but honestly who writes reviews when angry legitimately#a lot of people yes but should i be one of them#but also if this hit me on my home or office depot and i only had a months notice i would be fucked#it’s not a crazy amount and probably not fucked but put in a way trickier money situation i would have not been happy about at all#so like if i could warn some one and sure - this was an accident but also#if this happened at my others jobs and let’s say my family couldn’t help bc my mom can’t rn#not talking to either of my brothers#ur fuck up as far getting with my insurance than getting with me is now on me? ur fucking stupid#and the only other answer was like u can come in to do payment plans we would need ur signature and a 25 dollar fee. consider this. kill ur
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#i am going to a referral to have someone look at my blood work#they sent me a dozen pages of paperwork to fill out and want me to bring my will and power of attorney#neither of which do i actually have written out and i am not going to try to put together in just a few days?#it is a consultation#like ok if i were going into the hospital but literally he's supposed to look at my blood cell count#there's not any point where they need to see my legal paperwork?#like medical history ok i understand and i understand wanting to know my medications#but i'm not disrupting my entire life for a consult that may not even be relevant?#like my referring doctor is just guessing at things now she has no idea what's going on#gonna call them and be like sorry i'm not trying to find a lawyer and draw up paperwork in a week while also working#i don't think it's even legal to ask to see someone's will? like what the fuck?#my parent's were being treated for stuff and we had to dig the wills out of my dad's files#nether one had an official power of attorney filed i don't think or medical power of attorney#like how is that your business when i haven't even met the doctor yet and may not even want to deal with your practice?#this thing where medical practitioners just assume you're going to go along with whatever they say is really irksome#like the ct scan place they're like you might be going straight to the hospital if your doctor says so#when at no time was i ever warned or given intimations that that was a possibility?#like what if i had plans? or a pet or a kid? like you have to let people know about things ahead of time?#especially if it's not an emergency?
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#so spike has diabetes and a uti rn and its gonna take a lot of work to keep him stable#we’re not putting him down hes not in pain just needs to be monitored more#but im pissed bc i kept asking my parents to take him to the vet and they kept shrugging me off with ‘’ur too sensitive hes fine’’#when he’s not eating and literally leaking and barely has any energy. and also lost 18% of weight since may#youd think after he had surgery to remove his eye last year theyd be more alert when something is obviously wrong#so they kept whining abt me ‘’pestering them’’ to call the vet and WHOOPS turns out if he was left alone for as much as they wanted#he wouldve fallen into a diabetic coma. theyre apologetic and saying i was right to pester but im angry#bc now hes been in pain all this time and we literally could have lost him if they insisted on waiting til the next vet visit several months#away#im mad bc theres this but where im shrill and overreactive so no one can take me seriously (which btw applied to my hs trauma bc everyone#insisted i was a sensitive baby and shouldnt care as much. when it was even physical abuse at times.)#and now that line of thinking? just bc it came from me? almost fucking killed my dog.#bc god forbid u take me seriously after ive warned abt multiple things and have been right about like 80% of the time#echoed voice#fuck me i guess my opinion is just so annoying and worthless we can let my dog suffer until theyre just TOO annoyed ig
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the thing is that ao3 is objectively a terrible archive in large part because its tagging system isn't standardized at all and its community is seemingly dedicated to constantly inventing new worse ways to tag their work in more unhelpful ways.
any actual archive, ESPECIALLY one with millions of works, has a robust tagging system that is standardized, clear, and enforced by moderation because if people can just upload works with zero tags beyond title and author it's impossible to fucking find anything OR filter out results that are irrelevant to what you're searching for. if i go to a library and ask to see the mystery novels and then half of the section is dictionaries, that's a bad fucking library! if i go to a library and ask to see the mystery novels but only two books are labeled as mystery novels and all the other mystery novels are labeled Puzzle Books, Brain ?, Dove History, [+230] that's a bad fucking library! if i go to the library and ask for mystery novels and get told to go fuck myself because this library believes categorizing books by genre is queerphobic, that's a bad fucking library! if i go to a library and ask to see the mystery novels and the librarian gives me CSEM, that's a bad fucking library!
in a good archive, the responsibility is ALWAYS placed on the archival staff to create a helpful search system and enforced rigorous, clear, and useful tags that ensure that when you are looking through their archive, you will find what you are looking for and not what you aren't. that's why archives NEED robust moderation! if you see a mistagged work, you need to edit it to be tagged correctly! if one of your search terms is unclear, actively misleading or redundant, you need to change it so that it's useful! if someone routinely incorrectly or insufficiently tags their uploads, you need to ban them!
but also, more importantly, being an archive doesn't mean that the works uploaded to that archive can't be criticized, and in fact helping people criticize them is one of the MAIN REASONS archives that store works that endorse profoundly terrible shit exist at all! by preserving this stuff we prevent its authors from pretending what they wrote doesn't exist! we can use its example to show people the thought processes of the real people who act on the ideas contained! we can clearly show people what the things we criticize look like and how to avoid or prevent them! archives aren't supposed to protect the creators of the works they contain from criticism at all even a little bit. being able to criticize archived contents and understand how they affect the world where the people who wrote them live is an extremely necessary part of archives that they should aim to support, not prevent.
#c.paradisi#needs to be stressed that ao3's tagging system is like this on purpose#by allowing authors to tag works with csem/etc vaguely or not at all ao3 both desensitizes fans to that stuff#and makes it almost impossible to track down people who write it. which protects them from criticism and discovery#but like yeah if you go to a library and are like hey. can you put this on your shelves#its my manifesto where i state that i plan to kill my spouse and detail how and when i will do it and my motives#theyre not gonna be like. sadly as a neutral archive we can do nothing to prevent this#theyre gonna report you and if they publicize it itll be to use as evidence in your trial#also most libraries have restricted sections because some books itd be irresponsible to lend to people#without at least warning them of the content or in some cases lending them to certain groups of people#for example theyre probably not going to lend the above book to a 6 year old#long post#ask to tag
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When you first introduce him, Simon instantly knows that he hates your now ex-boyfriend—especially after he broke up with you only two months into the relationship, and the reason behind it sets his teeth on edge.
You’re perfect and so sweet; how could he—
“He broke up with me because…I um…Do I really have to say it? It’s embarrassing.”
He bumps his knee into yours because he really fucking sucks at saying the right thing when the moment calls for it. “You don’t have to say anything.”
With a huff, you get a little flustered and glance down into your glass of beer, brows furrowed. “I couldn’t make him fit.”
It’s so soft, but he hears it as if you’d shouted it across the bar.
The only thought he can think of is that your ex-boyfriend is an idiot once he has your back pressed up against his chest and trembling thighs spread over top of his. Three of his thick fingers already work deep inside of you, filling the room with filthy squelching sounds and your breathy moans.
His thumb carefully drags over your clit, loving how you twitch in his arms. “See? Someone just needed to stretch your little pussy properly, huh?”
“Mhm.” You nod, pressing yourself further into him, thighs butterflying open. “It feels so good.”
“You’re so loose and wet. I bet my cock would slip right in.”
Your walls clench and flutter around him, and it takes everything in him not to toss you onto the bed and fuck you into his sheets. “Simon, can you fuck me? Please?”
It’s hard to deny you when you ask so sweetly, but he can’t give you what you want—not yet. You whine when he pulls one of his fingers out, but it cuts off into a surprised squeak when he grabs your smaller hand to bring it between your thighs.
“Put one of your fingers inside your pussy.”
You turn your head to look up at him, kiss-bitten lips pulled into a pout. “But—”
“Come on, love, be good for me.” Teeth nip your jaw as a warning. “I know you can be so good for me.”
Slowly, you ease your finger in beside his with little pants of his name. His cock jumps against your back as he watches your cunt open up to suck in the intrusion—it makes his stomach twist. Simon traps your finger between his and curls them alongside his inside you, tearing a sharp cry from your chest.
“You’re so gorgeous.” His words are raw, rumbling somewhere deep within his chest. “I’m gonna make you feel so good. So full. Better than your boyfriend ever could.”
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#simon ghost x reader#simon riley x reader#simon riley smut#simon riley imagine#simon ghost riley x reader#ghost x you#ghost x reader#ghost imagine#ghost smut#cod smut#cod fic#cod imagine#cod x reader#mw2 smut#mw2 x reader#mw2 imagine#.things i write
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