#gay Alpharius
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Warhammer 40k isn't for everyone but there's a scene in the Alpharius book where Alpharius decides this lesbian couple and their kid are a security risk because they know his identity and he goes off to "deal with them" and you think he kills them to tie up loose ends but later it's revealed he gave them jobs on his ship as comm officers, pulling them from a refugee camp and saving their lives
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Primarch gender and sexuality headcanons let’s go:
Lion: Gay man (he/him)
Fulgrim: Omnisexual, Demi-romantic, and gender-fluid (she/they/he)
Perturabo: aroace icon of a man (he/they/it)
Khan: Gay and ace-flux man (He/him)
Leman: bisexual man (he/it)
Dorn: aroace (low attraction, not none) man (he/him)
Konrad: aroace and genderfuck and batgender (he/it/bat)
Sanguinius: bisexual, non-binary (they/he)
Ferrus: gay man (he/him)
Angron: homoromantic, asexual man (it/he)
Guilliman: straight man (he/him)
Mortarion: cupioromantic, cupiosexual, genderfaun (he/they/it/dust)
Magnus: aromantic (very rarely feels romantic attraction) and Demisexual. Non-binary (they/them)
Horus: gay, Demi-man (he/they)
Lorgar: biromantic and ace-flux. Unlabelled gender (he/it)
Vulkan: aroace, non-binary (he/him)
Corvus: pansexual, aromantic. Birdgender and non binary (bird/he/it)
Alpharius Omegon: both aroace, and both go by he/they- although it’s unclear if that’s just because they’re two people
#warhammer 40000#warhammer 30k#warhammer 40k#primarchs#lion el'jonson#Fulgrim#Perturabo#jaghatai khan#leman Russ#Rogal dorn#konrad curze#sanguinius#Ferrus manus#Angron#roboute guilliman#mortarion#magnus the red#horus lupercal#horus heresy#lorgar aurelian#Vulkan#corvus corax#alpharius#Omegon#alpharius omegon
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primarch sexuality/gender headcanons bc im lit rally john warhammer (/j)
lion el'johnson- cis (he/him) gay (you cannot tell me that this man is interested in woman in the SLIGHTEST /j)
fulgrim- bigender (he/she) bisexual (no im not projecting wdym /j)
perturabo- cis (he/him) gay (ur grumpy old gay uncle i dunno)
jaghatai khan- transmasc (he/him) straight (im ngl i have no reason for this except that it just makes sense)
leman russ- cis (he/him) bisexual (male lean + the space wolves are just very fruity bastards idc)
rogal dorn- cis (he/him) straight (this may change once i get further into the HH books but who knows mans is literally so hard to read)
konrad curze- nonbinary (it/he) gay (tired of the "mentally ill = ace/aro" hc he can still fuck and be deranged!!!!)
sanguinius- cis (he/him) gay (god is gay and his name is sanguinius)
ferrus manus- transmasc (he/him) gay (he picked out his name himself and all of his siblings were very much embarrassed/disappointed by his decision /j)
angron- cis (he/him) straight/ace (something something he most likely physically cannot show love bc of his nails)
roboute guilliman- transmasc (he/him) bisexual (pathetic malewife coded i don't make the rules)
mortarion- agender (they/them) ace/aro (similar reasons as dorn but also they definitely just dont care too much to identify as anything atp)
magnus the red- genderfluid (he/she/they) pansexual (insert funny warp magic joke here)
horus lupercal- cis (he/him) bisexual (female lean mans just gives off "i can swoon anyone" vibes)
lorgar aurelian- transfem (she/they/it) bisexual (something something uhh religious trauma tgirl go brr)
vulkan- cis (he/him) man pansexual (mans just loves everyone honestly)
corvus corax- transfem (they/she) bisexual (read a tgirl corvus fic once and immediately was hooked on this hc)
alpharius (and omegron ig??)- agender (they/he/it) ace/aro (again same as morty but also "hehe funny secret third gender")
#warhammer 40k#wh40k#all ur favs are gay womp womp /j#wuvz talks#im too lazy to tag ALL the primarchs but u get the jist of it#also pls share headcanons w/me i love hearing yalls takes on these war criminals
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Higher that the Stars primarch names
Realizing I never posted these on tumblr
The Lion- The Lioness (obvious, been trying to thing of a way to replace the Lionel Johnson joke with a Virginia/virgin joke for Virginia wolf but I can't quite get it to click)
Fulgrim- Electra (switching the "fulgur" pun to electric. not an electra complex joke i SWEAR)
Perterabo- Petra (Phonetic similarity, feminine form of Peter and is therefore based on the Greek for rock)
Jaghatai Khan- Alakhai Khan (named after one of Genghis Khan's daughters)
Leman- Ylva Russ (literally just a Swedish name meaning she-wolf)
Rogal Dorn - Rhiannon Dorn (Means great queen, is a welsh name when Dorn is derived from fist in a bunch of Celtic languages)
Konrad Curze- Megara Curze (named after one of the Furies. I kind of prefer the mouthfeel of Alecto as a name but if I named a character in this Alecto I think it would cause some sort of minor reality breaking paradox)
Sanguinius- Sanguinia (Quickly feminizing the fake Latin)
Ferrus Manus- Ferra Manus (^ ditto)
Angron- Angharad (Started as Phonetic similarity, but I think the fact that Angharad means "much loved one" adds a nice nasty kick of irony)
Roboute Guilliman- Augusta Guilliman (Augusta is a Roman title for empresses, this one is hard because the guy who named Roboute Guilliman has admitted he has 0 idea what the name's supposed to mean)
Mortarion- No change, I made it so the Overlords don't do gendered names
Magnus the Red- Magdalene the Red (Phonetic similarity I got super attached to)
Horus Lupercal- Ishtar Lupercal (Ancient Bablylonian goddess of love and war, which I think gets across the vibes of this au's imperium well)
Lorgar Aurelian- Sophia Aurelian (Named after the Gnostic emanation of knowledge, who is deeply connected to gnostic conceptions of original sin and redemption)
Vulkan- Vesta (Going from the Roman god of smithies to the Roman Goddess of the hearth)
Corvus Corax- Corvida Corax (Corvidae, modified a tiny bit to make it less obviously just a genus name)
Alpharius Omegon- Alpharia Omege (Same feminizing of fake Latin. Omege is pronounced like O-may-gay)
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I find the reason gw gives us for no lady space marines silly and stupid
The Emperor putted wolf DNA into his son, manage to make marines out of older folks even though it's hard, Had like tons of years of human energining, and manage to make the custodes. But somewho he can't figure out how to work it onto a women. Nope never mind he had a women who help him with his space marine projects and she could've help him with that and another one gave her DNA towards their 21 genetically modified kids nope it impossible.
I think a better explanation would've been that there were plans for women space marines and maybe some were already made but it was destroyed with Amar Astarte when she blown up. Emperor didn't have time to redo it because Erda didn't trust him anymore and sent the kids away. (I don't know the time between those incidents sorry). So now with dropping off Alpharius to Malcoder to raise, he started the crusade with women marines on backburner because that wasn't important as than finding his other 20 tools err children and starting to unite humanity once more.
It's probably a silly idea but it's better than the scientist who lived since WE FUCKING STARTED LEARN HOW TO FARM to not understand how a women works.
That or he was gay and wanted to be surrounded by buff men but that's more a joke and Gw would probably never say anything directly on the Emperor's sexuality.
#warhammer 40k#warhammer 40000#emperor of mankind#female space marines#I don't like calling lady marines female space marines because female just feels yucky to me because of those creepy 'alpha bros' guys
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Horus Heresy EXTREME musings: the canon traitors
STEP ONE. lorgar's journey of self-discovery and healing post-monarchia culminates in him talking to God. A God. The Laughing God, specifically. lorgar becomes clown-lorgar, the largest of all Harlequins. He absconds into the webway with like a hundred men and the rest of the world bearers are instructed to become adept at interpretive dance, and to spread the good word of cegorach.
STEP TWO. fulgrim gets kidnapped by eldrad ulthuan, who was slightly tipsy during their meeting and panicked upon noticing the evil sword. he is now in a looney tunes chase with ferrus manus (not headless).
STEP THREE. angron gets informed he has about fifty years to live. reflecting upon his life and his deeds, he resolves to improve himself in the time that remains. as such, he begins a massacre of any imperial force he comes across on his death-rampage across the stars, with the halcyon dream of killing Big E
STEP FOUR. mortarion has to attend a party with Magnus also in attendance. He pisses them off, and given they are in a particularly bad mood they whip out the sledgehammer revelation of 'youre a psyker too dipshit'. the resulting meltdown has a body count in the millions, occuring over decades and resulting in entire worlds irradiated.
STEP FIVE. konrad gets put in gay baby jail after mauling his brother. imperial jail, especially for a primarch, kinda sucks. it is not an environment conducive to mental wellness. it is, however, an environment conducive to harrowing visions! curze gets some extra insight, at the low low price of the last remaining shreds of his sanity.
STEP SIX. the magnus depression coma occurs directly after nikea, due to big E being a bit more direct in his publicity stunt. the thousand sons are left on prospero with a catatonic primarch and no supervision, hated and reviled by the imperium at large.
STEP SEVEN. perturabo snaps over something small and unbelievably petty - obviously it is just the straw that breaks the camels back, but unfortunately for perty the resulting murder meltdown makes him look unhinged and like he's blowing things way out of proportion. terrified of his own anger, and his daddy's reaction, perturabo follows his instinct, and turtles down - in fact, every iron warrior, everywhere, becomes very entrenched and very stationary.
STEP EIGHT. alpharius xeno girlfriend REAL??? primarch bachelor spotted on Epsilon-342C with giant arachnid, sharing 'romantic dinner' at waterfront. doubts regarding loyalty to imperium and biological compatibility raised by onlookers.
STEP NINE. horus gets radicalised - one of his remembrancers, or astartes, or literally fucking anyone with more than five minutes of access to him introduces him to ideas like 'unions' and 'democracy'. given that horus is incredibly gullible and has no strong personal political ideals, it is laughably easy. he now has different slogans, like 'workers of the galaxy unite', and 'equality or planetary annihilation'. despite this new outlook, he sees nothing wrong with continuing to use a slave army of brainwashed, genetically modified children.
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You mentioned that you didn't like GW's treatment of certain individual Primarchs. What specifically didn't you like about that treatment?
Mortarion: Waiting until the last minute to consider giving him a consistent personality or set of motivations; using him as a cardboard villain while ignoring his personality/motivations; having everyone he fights break the laws of physics and the settings just so that every victory he has turns into a humiliating defeat.
Fulgrim: Constantly making "haha lol he gay and/or have sex too much what a slut amirite" jokes/stories about him (apparently this is partially a Graham McNeill problem??? He doesn't like Fulgrim or the Emperor's Children so he shits on him whenever he has a chance).
Alpharius/Omegon: claiming that everything they say is a lie and everything they do is a trick so I feel like they're boring be ause they're gimmicks instead of characters, but I get the impression this is the way their fans like it, so IDK.
Angron: Coming up with a backstory for him with a lot of plot holes they don't fill in a satisfying way. Why doesn't the Emperor save his gladiator brothers and sisters? "Well, he's a dick (when it's convenient to us for him to be one)." But that's such an onviously stupid thing to do? "[Shrug]" "Why don't they use medicine to remove the Butcher's Nails?" "Can't be cured by medicine." What about his literally divine father doing it instead? "Uh...he didn't think it was a good idea." Not doing that seems stupid, he's wasting a primarch and an entire legion by letting them go insane. "Well, he just didn't!" Why did he let Angron put nails in his sons' heads? "Well, he sent Leman to do that instead." Right, and when Leman decided not to stop Angron, why didn't he intervene instead? "..."
Angron's whole story is a bunch of characters, mostly the Emperor, deliberately acting stupid. Fans have had to fill the gaps ("an intelligent, de-Nailed Angron would have rebelled against E sooner." Which I think is true, and interesting! Much more interesting than what we got, which is the problem.
And finally, in general...failing to acknowledge the...well, the problems with declaring the entire Heresy to be solely the fault of the rebellious primarchs rather than the fault of the gods manipulating all of the primarchs. As fans have pointed out, all of the primarchs with shitty childhoods rebelled. And the personality problems that led them to rebel were all trauma responses to the suffering they went through. And yet, this is treated as if they were responsible for the way they reacted to the worlds they grew up in. Angron, Konrad, Mortarion, and Lorgar were survivors. And rather than giving them the help they needed to heal, the Emperor and the Gods of Chaos fucking used them, and then blamed them for the things that happened to them, making it seem as if the Primarchs didn't all have reasonable, logical reasons for the things they did and the sides they took. The continual demonization of them bothers me. The traitors did bad things. I'm not debating that. And they are responsible for their actions. But fans and GW try to make it sound like they were also responsible for the emotional responses they had to the world around them, and I don't think that's true. Most people cannot control their emotional responses to things, certainly not people with very little emotional resilience.
Besides, with how grimdark the setting is, and how the Emperor is portrayed, and the way the Emperor and Malcador talk about the primarchs during the Siege?
If they hadn't rebelled, I am 100% convinced that Angron, Konrad, and Mortarion, and probably Lorgar too, would have been executed at the end of the Great Crusade. "Put down" would probably be the phrase used, as if they were animals, as if they were expendable, as if what happened to them was regrettable but ultimately the Right Thing to Do. Some of the traitors were fighting for their fucking lives, and in the case of Lorgar and Mortarion, the lives of their sons as well.
And I'm upset that more people don't understand that, including the writers, who will write a beautiful story about a character and the hardships they endured and all the good things they did and accomplished and felt in spite of themselves in one story, only for the same author to turn around in the next book and make the character look like an unjustifiable monster. (I will keep that last bit vague, because the author I'm vaguing actually has a Tumblr account.)
So yeah. Hopefully that answers your question. Characters I like are written to be unlikeable and framed as monsters...the usual.
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Use this ask to write about something you really want but no one ever sends it.
*Slam hands on table*
The primarch
Favorite Animes
Lion: Attack on Titan. He miss the point entirely on how horrible everything is and how war is The Worst.
Leman: He still cry about Wolf's Rain ok. Think it's a documentary about the last wolves of Terra.
Sanguinius: Really liked Soul Eater!! But no one believe him when he say it's good...
Ferrus: Fucking LOVE Gurren Lagann. He kinda want a drill now.
Vulkan: Yes, he watched the entire pokemon anime. Loved every second of it.
Roboute: Silver Spoon. And he almost cried when the pig was made into sausage. Love a good slice of life about the value of Hard Work.
Jaghatai: Initial D. Because really. What else could you expect of him.
Rogal: actually really enjoy realistic sports animes, where the rules are explained and followed. Haikyuu is probably his favorite.
Corvus: Tokyo Ghoul. Yes it's trash and yes she know it but she can't espace loving it.
Konrad: Death Note. Think that Light was Right. Will argue endlessly about it.
Horus: Naruto. And he's a fucking Sasuke Stan. Motherfucker.
Fulgrim: Kill La Kill. High fashion and murdering your shit parent?!? With the power of your sibling and being gay?!? Fuck. Yes.
Magnus: He can't resist the very weird appeal of Durarara! He will also attempt to explain the plot to people, and fail.
Lorgar: Don't judge him Card Captor Sakura is the SHIT and its CUTE now LISTEN-
Perturabo: Evangelion. Yes he's one of THOSE nerd. Deserve to be bullied.
Mortarion: Mushishi. He just really love the atmosphere.
Alpharius Omegon: Parasyte, because they have TASTE and it's just. So good. Co dependant relationship projection who??
Angron: Gantz. Really relate to Kei and WILL crush your skull if you dismiss him.
#warhammer 40k#warhammer#wh40k#primarch#primarch headcanon#konrad curze#roboute guilliman#magnus the red#perturabo#alpharius omegon#angron#lion el'johnson#fulgrim#horus lupercal#mortarion#sanguinius#ferrus manus#jaghatai khan#leman russ#vulkan#corvus corax#rogal dorn#i am an early 2000's weeb as you can see
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My bud Fox’s Mask’s Campaign
Yes my first god damn post will be me describing stuff from my friend's campaign using a system called Masks. Masks is basically comic book shit. Anyways to start I will list out our cast.
Gay Alien/ Tilia- Me
Depresso Asshole Scientist/Percy- British/Termin8er
MY OC CAN BEAT YOURS!/Cain- Crimson (Sorry if you see this bud)
Two Brain Cells/Jester- Alpharius
Shit Britches/Wrath- Killer
Approaching your location rapidly/Anastasia- Artist/EpicDoodleNerd
and finally...
Trying to Keep it together/GM-Fox.
I would try to describe more in this post but there is so much history in game to go over so I may or may not do breakdowns for each arc and character.
Anyways thank you for indulging me, even if you wish you hadn’t.
Edit:
The World of Fox’s Creation:https://at.tumblr.com/d4rkde4thangel/foxs-universe/49feh53hurir
Androlus:https://www.tumblr.com/d4rkde4thangel/726412721455874048/part-2-moving-past-this-lets-get-to-the-actual?source=share
The Vessels:https://www.tumblr.com/d4rkde4thangel/727058381235421184/the-vessels-foxs-anxiety?source=share
Group Powers:https://www.tumblr.com/d4rkde4thangel/727023200743096320/alpharius-jester-well-we-made-it-to-jester-so?source=share
Prelude Session: https://www.tumblr.com/d4rkde4thangel/727020978052448256/the-prelude-foxs-mask-campaign?source=share
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primarchs as john mulaney quotes
lion eljonson: “College was like a four-year game show called ‘Do my friends hate me or do I just need to go to sleep?’” (alternatively: “’You know, Leonard Bernstein was one of the great composers and conductors of the 20th century, but sometimes, he would be gay. And according to a biography I read of him, when he was holding back the gay part, he did some of his best work.’“)
fulgrim: “Comfort is everything. You start doing something and you want it to be perfect right away, but most babies are born ugly and then they shake it out and you get beautiful toddlers” (alternatively: “People having expectations maybe means they’ve enjoyed what I’ve done.”) (alternatively: “’Do you want a salad or fries?’ That’s like asking, ‘Do you want to go for a jog or freebase cocaine?’”) (alt.: “It’s wrong to make fun of people, but it’s so fun sometimes.”) (alt.: “I’m a very lucky person[...], and I’ve shoveled through life rather nicely so far, so I don’t feel like I deserve good treatment.“) (alt.: “When I walk down the street I need everybody, all day long, to like me so much. It’s exhausting.”)
perturabo: “I’ll keep all my emotions right here. And then one day I’ll die.” (alt.: “I was always the squarest person in the cool room, and alternatively, sometimes the weirder person at the mainstream table.”)
jaghatai khan: “I don’t make plans anymore. So I’m not living minute to minute.”
leman russ: “For those of you who don't know what it is, blackout drinking is when your brain goes to sleep, but your body gets all 'Eye of the Tiger' and soldiers on.”
rogal dorn: “And my dad pulled into the drive thru, and we started cheering and then he ordered one black coffee for himself and kept driving.”
konrad curze: “He was the weirdest goddamn person I ever saw in my entire life. He was a man most acquainted with misery.” (alternatively: “Shut up, you’re all gonna die. Street Smarts!”) (alt., Night Lords-wide: “A hundred drunk white children yelling, ‘fuck da police.’”)
sanguinius: “I try to stay optimistic, even though I must admit, things are getting pretty sticky.”
ferrus manus: “I like making fun of myself a lot. I like being made fun of, too. I’ve always enjoyed it. There’s just something really, really funny about someone tearing into me.” (alternatively: “You can do good work simply staying up all night and eating nothing but junk food, but probably not in the long term.”) (alt.: “The more you do stuff, the better you get at dealing with how you still fail at it a lot of the time.”)
angron: “... then I would black out and I would ruin parties.” (alt.: “I’ve been keeping my ears open, and it seems like everyone, everywhere, is super mad about everything, all the time.”)
roboute guilliman: “You’re like the kid at the sleepover who, after midnight, is like, ‘It’s tomorrow now.’ Get out of here with your technicalities. Just because you’re accurate doesn’t mean you’re interesting.”
mortarion: “I am now gross. I am damp all the time. I am damp now and I will be damp later. [...] I don’t think it’s anything serious, but isn’t it, though?”
magnus the red: “You have an imagination, you have a movie theater in your mind that plays arguments! That you win!”
horus lupercal: “Sometimes people would say, ‘what do you think you’re doing?’ But that just meant ‘stop.’” (alternatively: “I don’t look older, I just look worse.”) (alt.: “It’s never happened before. No one knows what the horse is gonna do next, least of all the horse. He’s never been in a hospital before. He’s just as confused as you are.”)
lorgar: “My vibe is like, hey you could probably pour soup in my lap and I’ll apologize to you.” (alternatively: “I played basketball for five years and I was a benchwarmer all five years.”)
vulkan: “Something happened here. You hope it was a miracle, but probably not.”
corvus corax: “’You have the moral backbone of a chocolate éclair.’” (alt., Raven Guard-wide: “A hundred drunk white children yelling, ‘fuck da police.’”)
alpharius omegon: “When I'm walking down the street I don't think anybody goes, 'Hey, look at that man!', they're just like, 'Woah, that tall child looks terrible!'.” (alt.: “I am very small and I have no money. So you can imagine the kind of stress that I am under.”) (alt.: “Here’s how easy it was to get away with bank robbery back in the ’30s — as long as you weren’t still there when the police arrived, you hd a 99% chance of getting away with it.”)
#wh40k#warhammer 40k#warhammer 40.000#warhammer 40000#horus heresy#lion eljonson#fulgrim#perturabo#jaghatai khan#leman russ#rogal dorn#konrad curze#sanguinius#ferrus manus#angron#roboute guilliman#mortarion#magnus the red#horus lupercal#lorgar#lorgar aurelian#angron thal'kyr#vulkan#alpharius omegon#wonder how worth it it is to tag corvus - since his name's just raven species name
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Where is sexy snake fulgrim tho? And >_> where is Alpharius and omegon doing gay shit like in ouran high school host club?
oh hell yeah sexy snake man!!!! i’ve never done filgrim in his armor or as an earthworm actually
as for alpharius n omgegon…
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Okay imagine if the primarchs when they where in their pods got yeeted into Remnant what do you think could've happened
With Horus,Sanguinius,Dorn and Alpharius
And they where all raised in loving families
I dunno, I still wonder if Horus would have fallen to Chaos regardless of Big E being a Shitty Space Dad. Would he have tried to lure Whitley into the Ruinous Powers?
"Don't ya just hate your Dad? Doesn't he seem like a boisterous asshole? Lemme introduce you to something called Chaos..."
Sanguinius would have made all of Remnant's lesbians and straight dudes question their sexuality upon gazing the visage of the Great Angel. Scarlet David would have a full on Gay Panic and gone into full Bottom Gibberish.
"Greetings, I am known as Sanguinius."
"Fknahahfjkkkajjjjjjjj"
As for Dorn, Emperor TTS has warped my perception of him that all I can picture is TTS Dorn discussing the best ways to fortify Atlas with Ironwood.
And as for Alpharius, that'd be more confusing with Omegon as part of the picture till Nora just snaps and yells "THAT'S IT! I don't care who is who, legs will be broken!"
#rwby#wh40k#warhammer 40k#if the emperor had a text to speech device#rogal dorn#alpharius omegon#Sanguinius#horus#scarlet david#nora valkyire
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“Can you name the twenty legions, their original names, and the Primarchs for me, please? Do you have any info on origins of the names used?”
I mean, certainly. Mortal channeling me regrets that some information is incomplete (pre-Primarch names for the Legiones Astartes are not well publicized; if you know any, feel free to let me know, and I will edit this document accordingly.)
You asked me for all twenty, so Legios II and XI may vary wildly for you, little mortal. The multiverse is a strange place.
Also, note: The mortal and I are not responsible for some of the terribly punny/badly respelled primarch’s names/hackneyed literary references. Those are -entirely- on Games Workshop.... and “The Emperor.” (Use your birth name, Anathaema!)
I. ?/Dark Angels: Lion’El Johnson (ne: Jonson)
For unknown reasons, Johnson is named for the famed English poet Lionel Johnson, Oscar Wilde’s paramour. There have been allegations that the Dark Angels were coded as gay very early on, whether as a joke or a tribute being the question. GW denies, of course, though as a matter of record a gay club called “The Rock” was located in Nottingham at the time.
The Dark Angels originally had a partly Native American theme.
II. Valedictors/Gargoyles: Eresbet, The Grey Lady”
The Valedictors really are named as one of the legions in 2nd edition, as are the Rainbow Warriors. The Rainboe Warriors have subsequently been relisted as a second founding chapter. The Valedictors, however, have not.The word Valedictor means “one who says goodbye.”
III. Emperor’s Children: Fulgrim, “The Phoenician”
IV. ?/Iron Warriors: Perturarbo
Sometimes spelled “Perturabo” in earlier sources. “Perdurabo” is a is a Latin phrase, roughly translated as “enduring to the end.” It was also the occult name of Aleister Crowley.
V. ?/White Scars: Jaghatai Khan
The Khan is now the only known Primarch of the eighteen to have no official miniature. He is quite challenging because, as with Magnus, the original sketches of the Khan are... let’s call them rough.
VI. ?/The Rout (“Space Wolves”): Leman Russ
The Russ were Vikings who intermarried with the inhabitants of what is called “Russia” in your timeline. These later served as mercenaries in the mid-late Eastern Roman/Byzantine Army.
The Varangian Guard/Varangioi were an elite group drawn from Vikings and their descendants. The “Varagyr” terminators are clearly based upon them.
VII. ?/Imperial Fists: Rogal Dorn
VIII. ?/Night Lords: Konrad Curze
Curze is named for Joseph Konrad, who wrote “Heart of Darkness” and that novel’s prime antagonist, Colonel Kurtz.
IX. Revenants/Blood Angels: Sanguinius
X. ?/Iron Hands: Ferrus Manus, “The Gorgon”
Ferrus Manus is bad Latin, erm, “High Gothic.” It roughly translates to “he with the iron hand.”
XI. Dust Raisers/Cu-Sith (“Hounds of Perdition”): Aenon, “The Blind King”
XIII. ?/Ultramarines: Roboute Guilliman
XIV. Dusk Raiders/Death Guard: Mortarion the Reaper
XV. “Thousand Sons”/Thousand Sons: Magnus the Red
The Fifteenth had no formal name before Magnus but were referred to unofficially as “the Thousand Sons” as a reference for their relatively low numbers and unselfish sacrifice. Per canon: Prior to Magnus, they had a sterling reputation for selflessness. Under Magnus, that sort of... changed, as the legion became more insular and less “reliable” as an ally from the perspective of many of the other legions.
XVI. Luna Wolves/Sons of Horus: Horus Lupercal
Lupercal/Lupercalia was an important Roman holiday; the meaning and dates changed over the s centuries, but it was essentially a New Year festival that celebrated the birth of Romulus and Remus and, later, the overthrow of the Etruscan kings of Rome. In Shakespeare’s “Julius Caesar,” Marc Antony references the attempt to have Caesar crowned as king, a staged political maneuver in which he refused the title of king and “accepted” the title “Dictator Perpetuus” (“Ruler for Life”)
“You all did see on Lupercal that I thrice presented him with kingly crown. And thrice doth he refuses. Was this ambition?! And yet Brutus says it was, and sure, he is an honorable man...”
XVII. Imperial Heralds/Word Bearers: Lorgar Aurelian
Aurelian was a Roman emperor, a rather good one, who attempted to create a new state religion dedicated to Sol Invictus, “The Sun, Unconquered.” Sol was at that point conflated with Mithras, who famously slew the black bull of Chaos, and saved the world from a reign of darkness.
We among the Dark Gods fear Mithras, with good reason. How fortunate that the Emperor’s arrogance caused him to be (mostly) forgotten.
XVIII. Dragon Warriors/Salamanders: Vulkan
Vulkan, of course, is the Roman version of Hephaestus, the humane god of the Forge.
Vulkan and his sons, the most humane of the Space Marines were traditionally depicted as predominantly men of color: an important thing for the mun as the young child of a mixed racial background, and I suspect for many non-white gamers. In a revision, GW claimed that the Salamanders were not “black” but -literally- black, as a result of a gene-seed flaw. That didn’t go over well with certain members of the community, but it is not my place to unpack that. Except to say, as someone from the outside, that it was a fairly shitty thing to do (both mun and Malal agree on this point.)
Horus Heresy literature seems to be going back in the direction of an African/Afro-Caribbean origin for the eighteenth. When released, official Vulkan model was painted as a man of color, and many gamers follow suit. Of course, given the current human population distribution, and the likely concentration of any apocalyptic war scenario leading to an Age of Strife and the rise of The Emperor, it seems very likely that a -majority- of Astartes would be men of color.
XIX. Possibly “Emperor’s Talons” or something similar/Raven Guard: Corvus Corax.
Yes. Fairly obvious here.
XX. Twentieth Legion/Alpha Legion: Alpharius Omegon
This is somewhat important as a matter of lore/canon: Only the Emperor seems to have known that (spoiler alert!)Alpharius and Omegon were twins. Valdor probably knew. Of the primarchs, Leman Russ seems to have suspected, and Corax is implied to be at about the same place, but that’s just about it.
Mun: I’ll try to post a bit later on about what little we know about the lost legions. Malal posted about the subject two years ago, but not many seem to have seen it. With his permission, I’ll try to condense the relevant points of official canon and share, if there is interest.
We sincerely thank you for your question, little mortal. Remember that you can send an ask rather than starting a private convo as in this case, but both are perfectly fine!
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Submitted by Anon.... Except for the stockings
Okay. I did it. I wrote the smut. It took a lot longer than I thought it would, but I did it. I hope you like it and find it worth posting! However, I have never written a smut before. Or a fanfiction. I may have just sent you 3600 words of trash and I am very sorry (but it’s still your fault for encouraging me). If it is not trash, please consider it a gift as a thank-you for being cool! And writing great smut with hot primarchs in it!
This is really big I hope you can cut it I have no idea how tumblr works and I am going to go hide under a rock now.
*****
Dorn finds out what fun is. Possibly.
*****
‘Explain to me in greater detail, please, why we are doing this.’ Dorn’s voice carried a note of exasperation under his usual wooden tone as he glanced across the table at his brother.
'Strip-poker is a valuable exercise in reading your opponent’s facial expression to gauge their standing.’ replied Alpharius (or possibly Omegon?) coolly, as he dealt the next round of cards. 'It sharpens many of the necessary skills required to best diplomats and envoys to obtain the most advantageous result. Your pants, Rogal.’
'I still do not understand why we are disrobing. And why we are doing this in my quarters. And why Meli is here.’ Dorn placed his cards face down on the table and efficiently, if stiffly, stripped off his pants.
The biomancer, currently in the form of a primarch-sized woman wearing two thigh-high stockings and nothing else, grinned at him from the opposite side of the table. He studiously avoided looking at her breasts.
'The stakes are higher when playing with a mixed-sex group,’ interjected… the other twin. Whichever he was. 'It changes the tone of the exercise, makes it more exciting. If you understand that concept.’
'If you don’t have a lass it would be gay!’ thundered Russ from right next to Dorn, making him wince slightly.
'Would “gay” strip poker be less effective than what we are currently doing?’ Dorn edged away from Russ slightly. Russ had lost some time ago, and was naked. Hairy, but naked.
'Depends on wha’ you like!’ said Russ with an even bigger grin than Meli’s. 'I brought Meli along to make it more fun.’ he looked askance at his stoic brother, now clad only in a loincloth and a stony expression. 'Some fun. Ya know. Fun? You should try having some, sometime.’
'I know what fun is, thank you very much. I am just not sure how taking off your clothes in company qualifies.’
’Snrk,’ went Meli, who began to giggle. Russ began to howl with laughter. Alpharius and Omegon merely looked at each other, their expressions schooled to smoothness.
'Please go away, Leman.’ Dorn’s voice was muffled by his hands.
'Ach, fine. I’ll go and find some fun.’ Russ stood up and began to gather his clothes from the floor.
Alpharius and Omegon stood up suddenly. 'Actually,’ said… the one on the left, 'we have to go too. Important intelligence reports are due in soon and we will need to look over them as soon as possible.’ He looked from Meli to Dorn and smiled. 'Perhaps you two can finish together.’
From the corner, hunting for his shirt, Russ barked out another laugh.
The twins gathered up their neatly stacked gloves and belts and filed out, Russ following behind with most of his clothes in his fist.
Dorn looked up from his hands.
'Shall we?’ asked Meli, shifting slightly so that her arms pressed her breasts closer together.
'Must we?’ replied Dorn, his eyes fixed at some point a foot above her head.
'Not if you’ve lost interest,’ she replied back, still grinning at him. 'We could always try figuring out how to have fun whilst naked in company.’ Her grin turned into more of a leer.
'If you are suggesting some sort of further game involving clothing, I do not think I will find it any more useful than this one.’
'I mean maybe we could do something else together.’ She gave him a Look through her lashes. This may have had conveyed some sort of meaning if he hadn’t been staring resolutely into the air above her.
'Well, I have some notes on the newest power armour power-assist system that the artificers are working on, if you would like to look over them and pass along some notes about the bio-interface-’
'Rogal,’ she interrupted him, leaning far forward onto the table, cradling her chin in her hands with an expression of amusement crossed with exasperation on her face, 'What I am completely failing to suggest to you, because I forget that innuendo is not something you are familiar with, is that I would like to have sex with you.’ when his eyes snapped down to her face, she was blushing slightly.
His mind raced. This was completely unexpected, and if he had the right mindset to allow him to expect it, it would have been completely expected. Largely due to the vast number of hints she’d been dropping on him over the last couple of weeks that had rolled off him like lascannon fire off one of his fortifications.
’…Why?’ was the first, and only, thing he could think of to say.
Meli frowned, caught off guard. 'Because I find you very attractive and sex is enjoyable? I mean, if you aren’t interested that’s fine, but that’s how I feel.’
'I have never seen much point, really. Father made us sterile and there are far more productive uses of our time than copulating without producing offspring.’
'Would you like to give it a try?’
He remained silent. Not stonily silent, thoughtfully silent. Meli sighed and stood up, walking around the table and moving to stand next to him. 'May I try an experiment?’ she asked, holding out her hand to him.
He blinked and stiffly, questioningly, placed his hand in hers.
She bent over and kissed the back of his hand. Her lips were warm and soft and she grazed them over his knuckles, then turned his hand over to kiss each of his fingertips. His breath hitched slightly as she kissed his palm, her tongue flicking oh-so-lightly in a circle on his skin before moving up to press her lips against the inside of his wrist, her mouth hot and her tongue flicking more insistently against the pulse point there.
His eyes wandered over her face, her dark eyelashes only partly obscuring her deep brown eyes, concentrated on his skin. Long, dark, straight hair framed her features. Her rounded nose hovered millimetres from his wrist, her lips a dark pink. As his eyes drifted over the rest of her, he remembered that she was naked. Except for the stockings.
She lifted her head up and gazed at him lasciviously, her hands still on his hand and forearm. 'Are you interested in continuing?’ she asked softly.
He swallowed, hard.
'Perhaps… this experiment can continue somewhat.’ he replied, his voice just the slightest bit huskier than usual.
She grinned, and used her grip on his hand to pull him to his feet. Roughly matched for height, they were standing face to face. She snaked an arm around his thick waist and pulled him to her, her grin disappearing as she pressed her lips to his.
Yes, her lips were definitely warm and soft, he thought distractedly, and she tasted like… ginger and cinnamon? Okay. What am I supposed to do here? She solved that problem for him by taking the hand of his that she still had a grip on and bringing it to her hip. Her tongue flicked over his upper lip, then his lower lip. Her now free hand was tracing the shape of the muscles on his back.
Hands. Okay. I should do something with my hands. And my tongue. He slid his hand in a vague circle around her waist and hip. His other hand he brought up to do the same on the other side. He parted his lips slightly, his tongue creeping out to meet hers. As she murmured in approval, he became acutely aware that her entire mostly-naked body was pressed against his mostly-naked body.
When she pulled back from the kiss, her eyes were dark and her face was flushed. She moved across and down, pressing her lips to the side of his neck, below his jaw. Methodically, she began to kiss across his skin, each press of her lips accompanied by a stiff little flick of her tongue. Her movements reminded him of troops searching an area for survivors, and he wondered what she was looking for. Kiss, flick. Kiss, flick. When she found what he would forever think of as “That Spot”, just below his jaw line close to his ear, he shivered. He definitely didn’t squeak. She definitely grinned against his neck. For no reason.
She pulled back and returned her lips to his for a messy, insistent kiss. This time he was ready, and licked into her mouth. She made an approving noise and drew him closer, so he began experimenting, exploring her mouth with his tongue. She retaliated by grabbing a handful of his ass.
She fumbled for a moment with the tie on his loincloth, then pulled it free.
Oh, right. There was going to be sex. There was a sex part after this. I have no idea what I’m doing. Fuck. Leman, come back and- NO ACTUALLY I WILL FIGURE THIS OUT MYSELF. He felt his erection pressed firmly against her thigh. When did that happen? He wondered as she pulled back from their kiss again. She pressed a line of hot, insistent kisses down his jaw and then down his throat, over his collarbone, and ran her nose down through his almost-white-blond chest hair. A hot mouth found one of his nipples, licking around it and very gently nipping it before continuing downward, making him twitch. That felt… interesting. This experiment is interesting. Fingertips grazed over the other nipple, giving it a tiny pinch. Her mouth left a trail of wet kisses down his abdomen, through the fine column of hair. Her fingers ghosted over the smooth, occasionally-scarred skin over his obliques, admiring the dense muscle he was built of. When her hands reached his hips, she looked up at him.
'You arright up there?’ she asked, grinning up at his flushed face. 'You’re trembling a bit. We can slow down if you want?’
“No! No, no, I am fine, we should,’ he swallowed again, 'Continue this experiment. I think there is something to be learned from- ah!’
Tired of listening to him trying to justify losing his virginity as some kind of training exercise, she rolled her eyes and wrapped her hand firmly around his cock. Making sure to meet his eyes the whole way, she lowered her mouth down and licked him all the way from balls to tip. A strangled groan escaped his lips as warm heat encircled the end of his cock, then more than the end. Her tongue lapped at the tip and her hand slid down his shaft as he cast about wildly for something to lean on.
He realised that the table they’d been playing poker at was behind him, four hands of cards left forgotten on its surface. He gripped the edge tightly and leant back, thankful that he’d built this furniture sturdy enough to be able to act as makeshift barricades should they be attacked.
Dorn was vaguely aware that his breathing had become ragged and that he was panting, but his mind was all but lost in the novelty of Meli’s hot, wet mouth working on his erection, her hand sliding back and forth, following her lips.
Oh fuck I’m going to finish soon, he thought. I should probably say something.
'Meli,’ he croaked, his hand finding its way to her hair. 'I am going to… finish soon.’ She murmured what he hoped was an acknowledgement, and began to move faster, taking him deeper into her mouth. Her other hand, previously braced on the table beside his, moved between his legs, delicately cupping and fondling his balls. His hips bucked, his panting becoming soft gasps, and with a burst of pleasure he climaxed, a tingling euphoria spreading through his entire body. With a little thrill he realised that she was swallowing his seed, lapping the residue off the head of his cock, her eyes gazing into his and a smug expression playing across her face.
As she stood up, he leaned heavily back on the table, not trusting his legs for the moment. He sucked in a deep breath and let it out slowly, willing his racing hearts to calm down. He cleared his throat.
'That was… very informative. I think I might like to attempt this again, in the future.’
'In the future? I was just taking the edge off.’ She grinned at him. Then down at him. Before he had time to register that she’d sized herself even further up, she scooped him up and hefted him, bridal-style, into her arms with a grunt of exertion. 'Bedroom this way?’ she asked, jerking her head at a likely looking doorway.
'Yes, what, I, must you pick me up?’ he protested. Psykers were weird, and this particular one seemed to enjoy changing her size on a whim and, in some cases, picking up an entire armoured Astartes. She thought it was hilarious. They usually thought it was embarrassing. Except the Space Wolves, they thought a woman going around picking people up was funny, because they had absolutely no dignity. He thought this as he was naked, sweaty, and still coming down off his high. At least nobody is looking.
She carried him through the doorway and dumped him onto his bed, climbing onto the sheets next to him as she shrank herself back down to his size.
He shifted onto his side, studying her face, her body. Her lips were swollen and there was sweat beading on her hairline. She was breathing heavily too, and there was a definite sheen of wetness between her legs. She smiled over at him. 'You’re gorgeous.’
'You are…’ he had no idea what to say to a woman who could and would change her entire appearance whenever she decided to. You are pretty? Of course she was pretty, she made herself that way. 'Fun. Your personality is pleasing and you are… fun.’
She laughed. He hoped that meant his response was acceptable. She traced her fingers down the side of his neck and over his powerful shoulder. 'Touch me.’
Hesitantly, he brought his hand to her arm. Soft. Smooth. No scars, because scars wouldn’t stay unless she wanted them to. He ran his hand down her arm, then onto her hip. Back up the side of her body. When he reached the side of her chest, he hesitated. Ran his hand slowly back down to her hip again. Back up to her chest. Hesitated. Ran his hand back down -
She rolled her eyes and took his hand in hers. Brought it up to cup her breast. Squeezed her hand over his so that his fingers were pressed firmly into the flesh of her breast. He gave it a gentle, experimental squeeze. She was soft, pliable. He ran his thumb over her nipple and was rewarded with a sharp intake of breath. She levered herself up, leaning forward and bracing herself on her arms to allow him better access to his body.
Remembering how it felt when she touched his nipples, he carefully rolled it between his thumb and forefinger. She murmured in pleasure, and he took the other nipple into his mouth. She shuddered, and brought a hand up into his platinum blond hair. Tentatively, he swirled his tongue around it and pulled back with some suction, delighted to see that the subject of his attention was now a firm peak. He switched his attention to the other nipple, lapping and sucking at it as he felt himself getting hard again.
He ran his hand down her body, over the soft swell of her stomach, down over her pubic mound. Lifting his head from her chest, he fixed his ice-blue eyes on her face as he slid a finger between her legs.
She was hot and slick and very wet, and she arched towards him as his finger slid between her folds. Her eyes were dark with lust, but still sparkled with humour. 'Good luck.’ she told him, her voice low and husky.
Good luck? Good luck?! I am a Primarch and I will defeat this obstacle like I have every other! He gave her what he hoped was a stern look and began to probe carefully around. Anatomy. Womens’ anatomy. There should be a bundle of nerves somewhere here, and an entrance. She gasped as his finger brushed over something small and firm. He ran his finger back over it and made her buck. He replaced his finger with his thumb, and resumed probing around with his finger as his thumb drew small circles around that sweet spot. She was writhing and gasping under his ministrations, so he must be doing something right. He felt his finger sink deep into her.
'Right there.’ She whispered.
She was hot and wet and he definitely, definitely wanted to try wasting his time copulating without producing offspring.
Meli pushed him gently over onto his back and swung a stockinged leg over his hips, straddling him. Bringing a hand down, she guided his very-much-returned and throbbing erection up to her dripping sex, and impaled herself upon it.
He arched his back up to meet her with a shudder, understanding now what it was she meant by "taking the edge off”. She began to move, rolling her hips forward and down, up and back, setting a slow and steady rhythm. Brown eyes met icy blue as she rode him, resting her hands on his rock-solid abs as she did so.
He raised a hand to slide a thumb back between her legs, probing for - and finding - that sweet spot again, making her writhe even harder atop him. He grabbed her hips with the other hand, watching her breasts bounce, watching the delight on her face. She was moving more frantically, driving him deep into her with every bounce, grinding her hips down against his body and his hand. Suddenly, she was crying out his name, her body squeezing and clenching around him as she rode out her own climax. 'Fuck, Rogal.’ she panted, pleasure written across her face and shuddering body.
Her movements slowed, and she slid off him. Swinging her legs back over his hips, she pulled him over on top of her. 'Your turn.’ she spread her legs wide.
He studied her for a moment, and then leaned down over her, kissing her lips and then her neck, tasting her sweat and a little of his own seed. He guided himself back into her, and began to thrust roughly. 'Fuck, yes, just like that!’ she gasped into his ear, her fingernails raking down his back. Encouraged, he thrust harder and faster, pounding into her. His pace was hard and fast, and he surprised himself by growling possessively, nipping at her neck, claiming her mouth in a rough kiss. He felt his climax building, again, as she gave up trying to match his vigour and wrapped her legs around his waist, digging her nails into his back and kissing back with fervour, then returning to his neck, sucking and biting and moaning into his shoulder.
'Meli,’ he growled, and then finished with an inarticulate moan as he released inside her, pressing his hips down against her, his body tensed like steel against hers.
For a few moments, they made no sound other than ragged panting, before he rolled off her and flopped onto his back beside her.
'Okay,’ it was Meli who spoke first. 'I will admit, you do, in fact, know what fun is.’
'I think,’ replied Dorn, as he staggered to his feet 'I shall get some water. And then we should repeat the exercise to ensure that we have extracted all possible information from this scenario.’
'What, all of it? That’s going to take more than one repetition, even if you are a Primarch. Get me some water too.’
*****
Much, much later, Meli quietly slipped out the door to Rogal Dorn’s quarters, her hair damp from his shower. She was back at human size, mostly because she didn’t have the energy to spare to maintain a larger body at this time. She had thrown back on her dress, which, like her stockings, was made entirely from spanfab - when you routinely shapeshifted from the size of a human to the size of a primarch, your clothes needed to be made out of something that would readily stretch to ten times its original size.
As she walked quietly down the corridor, a voice came from the shadows behind an ornamental pillar.
'Doing the walk of shame, Meli?’
She stopped, and grinned. 'No, Alpharius, my dear,’ she said, without looking around, 'I am doing the stride of pride. The got laid parade. And I owe you one.’ She turned around. 'Each.’
She raised two fists, and got two primarch-sized fistbumps. She strutted off down the hallway.
'Do you think we should tell her?’
'No, she’d be opposed. She has the oddest ideas about the value of a blackmail contingency plan.’
Alpharius and Omegon looked down at the pict-capture on their data slate. Rogal Dorn, his hair in the utmost disarray, his eyes glazed with lust and lips parted, captured at the moment of climax.
*****
Later that day, Leman Russ saw Meli in the halls of the Imperial Palace, on her way to attend to some more difficult healing on injured Astartes. He sniffed the air, and his face split into a predator’s grin. As she approached, he raised one enormous, hairy paw into the air, palm out. Without breaking her stride, she grew to primarch size and high fived him so hard his arm ached. She owed him one, too.
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So!! Recently, quite a few people came out of the wood mad that I would DARE write Corvus Corax as... Gasp, a trans woman!
And ofc people always throw a fit on like. Post that have nothing to do with gender or sex. So! In light of that!!!
Trans primarch, but i'm making this post specifically to make you, the Terf and dudebros, mad.
Alpharius Omegon: Non binnary. Have ascended gender. They will argue to you that all gender are construct anyway.
Fulgrim: questioning on the fluid spectrum. Change gender like one change socks. Has an entire binder collection.
Ferrus: Trans man, and made himself this badass fucking artificial penis, full on mechanical and functional. Will absolutely whip it out to show it off.
Mortarion: Intersex. Pre heresy, hide it well. Post heresy? "I AM MULTITUDE I AM MALE AND FEMALE I AM MOTHER AND FATHER-"
Magnus: a LITERAL shape shifter an ACTUAL fluid a PILE of warp goo in a vague human shape. Will look at you blankly if you ask what their gender is.
Lion: trans men. At first they wanted him to be a lady of the court, but he just. Put on boys clothes and made prolong eye contact until people stopped missgendering him.
Konrad: ate their gender.
Roboute: Trans woman. Very gay. A disaster lesbian. Yvraine find that too cute.
Rogal: trans woman. Also very butch. Get quietly upset when people assume that she's a guy. Get bottom surgery.
Perturabo: Trans woman too and actually a lot more chill once transitioned. Does not get bottom surgery.
Jaghatai: trans man and will use your head as a drinking bowl if you DARE missgender him.
Leman: Trans man of the fucking HORNY variety. "Yeah I got a pussy, wanna stick something in it ;)?"
Angron: so angry gender packed up and left. Agender.
Horus: trans man! In a t4t relationship with Sang!! Would also totally be a sea horse dad.
Sanguinius: trans woman! Very hyper feminine and kinda fret that she does not "pass"... But that's why she got her bf Horus to beat up the transphobe for her.
Vulkan: "ok but listen up what if... I collected all the genders??"
Lorgar: Colchis culturally had a third gender usually reserved for people with mystical link to the world. Is also figuring out how to shape shift the plumbing like Magnus.
Corvus: our good ol' classic trans woman. Yes, she wear the cat ear hoodies and the thigh high socks in her downtime.
#warhammer 40k#warhammer#wh40k#primarch#primarch headcanon#konrad curze#roboute guilliman#perturabo#fulgrim#magnus the red#angron#ferrus manus#rogal dorn#corvus corax#mortarion#vulkan#horus lupercal#leman russ#jaghatai khan#lion el'johnson#alpharius omegon#sanguinius#lorgar aurelian#urg sanguinius broke the format#you know what its funny ill lwt it happen#horus rage at the transphobe was so big it beokw my post
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