#fun fact! attempting to kiss him would earn you a rejection or simply the same reaction as above | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

azucanela · 4 years

Note

pls some headcanons for Bakugou, Shinsou and Shoto when the reader kisses them infront of everyone. Thank you :)

KISSING THEM IN FRONT OF EVERYONE

FT. BAKUGOU KATSUKI, SHINSOU HITSOHI TODOROKI SHOUTO

SUMMARY: in which you and the boys kiss in public, and now everyone is screaming. oh no.

WORD COUNT: 2.1k

WARNING: season three spoliers, insecurities, arguments,

A/N: i wanted to do scenarios bc this was too good ugh thank YOU for requesting this

BAKUGO KATSUKI

lol so HAVE FUN WITH THIS ONE

you two are already dating but you keep it on the down low because its Katsuki and he’s like ew people knowing i have feelings other than anger? ew ew ew

you’re fine with it, but if he thinks its bothering you he’ll talk to you about it and smother you with affection, but he’ll act like its nothing

wants to rub it in his faces that you are his girlfriend, yes, but also he doesn’t want the teasing that comes with it. he knows for a fact that all his friends would bully him because he is SOFT FOR YOUUU and he’s also just a generally private person

you respect this and like it’s fine woo yeah okay it’s nice being the only one that sees the side of him that’s all soft and cute and affectionate

i can’t really see the two of you slipping up unless it’s influenced by a lot of emotions

where do these emotions come from? you might ask

his kidnapping.

you were a mess, but it was lowkey, real lowkey. and unlike the others you do not support trying to save katsuki on their own, trusting the heroes to do their job is the way to go.

so you don’t go with them. the next time you see your lovely boyfriend is when he’s giving kirishima money

so naturally, consumed by all the fear and panic you felt while he was gone, you kiss him!

and he kisses you back and its really soft and oh-

what a shame the whOLE CLASS IS THERE

everyone is really confused, but they’re happy because they think that the two of you finally addressed the clear tension between the two of you, all it took was a lil kidnapping

except then you pull apart, completely disregarding them, your hands on his face, “baby are you okay?”

you don’t call someone you haven’t kissed before baby

then it clicks for the rest of the class

SCREAMS.

so much yelling

oh god have fun with that one

the bakusquad is yelling at him for not telling him, the dekusquad is scolding you for not telling them, there’s just a lot of questionable things

katsuki will get SO FLUSTERED because this is not what we wanted

at least the attention was off of his kidnapping now

maybe that was your goal idk 👀

Katsuki really wished everyone would shut up about his kidnapping, it wasn’t something he wanted to think about right now, or ever if he was honest. So much had happened in the past few days and he was still struggling to process all of it, and the disgustingly warm welcome he’d received to the dorms wasn’t helping. It was gross.

He’d shoved cash into Kirishima’s hand, rolling his eyes when he began to panic at the possibility that he’d taken it from Denki, shutting down the idea almost immediately.

And then he saw her.

Y/N was shoving past everyone and heading to him, and he couldn’t help the relief he felt when he saw her. Katsuki was grateful she hadn’t been involved in the little escape plan Deku had hatched out, but seeing her made him feel calmer than even as she practically tackled him, hands coming to his cheeks as she brought him into a kiss.

Their lips molded together perfectly, his hands coming to her sides and holding her like he’d never let go as her hands gripped his face rather harshly. It would have been the perfect moment, had the rest of his class not been there.

Y/N seemed to disregard this as she pulled apart, eyes darting across his figure as his brows furrowed at her clear distress. “Calm down, idiot.” His cheeks are turning red as he realizes that everyone is staring, but he can’t help but focus his attention on her as he feels a wave of relaxation wash over him as she begins to run her hands all over him in search of injuries.

“Oh, I’m sorry, for caring about your wellbeing.” She grumbled, wrapping her arms tightly around his torso when her hands left his face. “Baby, you scared me.” His arms wrapped around her shoulders securely, as he rolled his eyes, though Katsuki wouldn’t deny he was appreciating all the attention she was giving him, he was beginning to feel embarrassed as he allowed her to hold onto him.

As if the kiss hadn’t been enough to astonish the rest of their class, the pet name simply amplified their shocked as they all cried out, “baby?” Kirishima had exchanged looks with Mina, who looked equally confused before returning their gaze to Katsuki, a look of betrayal evident on both their faces.

Stupid barbarians. “SHUT UP EXTRAS!” Katsuki exclaimed, holding Y/N tighter to his chest as his cheeks flushed red, he could hear her laugh against his chest. “Can’t a guy hug his girlfriend in peace.”

“GIRLFRIEND?”

He was grateful for the subject change, though he didn’t appreciate the fact that his relationship had been exposed, until he looked back to Y/N, who beamed at him.

If she was happy then it was fine he supposed.

SHINSOU HITOSHI

welp

this one will probably have the funniest reaction

you did not just kiss him, in front of all these people, was that a joke?

i think he’s the only one you wouldn’t already be in a relationship with, purely because this is just 10x funnier

so ever since the two of you first started hanging, there have been people criticizing you for befriending him at all, because of his quirk, they just cannot believe that the Y/N L/N is hanging out with Shinsou Hitoshi

but also, ever since the two of you started hanging out, the bullying has lessened immensely, most because you threatened everyone it was really subtle, but they got the message

nobody screws with Y/N L/N

anyways, you two are probably hanging out again, and it’s been a while since you got one of those comments, which is the main reason this one sets you off.

“quit hanging out with that freak L/N, he’s gonna ruin your chances at becoming a pro.”

shinsou was used to this, and your violent reactions, so he immediately brought a hand to your arm to ensure you didn’t commit a murder, shaking his head at you

you turn back to him, and you’re lowkey glaring at him before turning your piercing eyes back to the other guys

and without breaking eye contact with them, you grab Shinsou’s face, earning stares from everywhere in the cafeteria, and then kiss him

shinsou is shocked

shinsou.exe

you killed him.

he did not anticipate this um, you kinda caught him by surprise with this one, he genuinely did not think it was possible for you to feel this way for him

when you pull away, the kiss is almost like magic

you don’t mess with Y/N’s friends, much less their boyfriend

When Y/N beams up at Shinsou, he can’t help the way his heart skips a beat. It’s ridiculous, he knows this, and he hates that he can’t prevent it. Shinsou is no fool, he knows Y/N L/N, a UA student that could potentially be a member of the Top Ten heroes in the future, would never like him. He wouldn’t be shocked if she befriended him entirely out of pity, given how students used to treat him prior to their unlikely friendship. She’d weaseled her way into his life, despite his attempts to avoid her, ignore her, and even tell her off, she’d stuck around.

And yes, Shinsou had made the mistake of liking her. On days like this, he’d entertain the possibility that Y/N liked him back, because sometimes she hugged him for longer than average friends did, or maybe she’d press a kiss to his cheek, or even hold his hands.

That was probably just something best friends did.

“Hitoshi! Don’t you know what this means?” She exclaimed, hands finding their way onto his shoulders in the middle of the cafeteria.

Yes, she used his first name.

Shinsou rolled his eyes, trying to keep himself from getting flustered purely because her hands were on him, “Y/N it’s not a big deal, and besides-”

“We’re going to be in the same class!” Her hands move from his shoulders to around them as she pulls him into a hug, “I’m so proud of you.”

He’s shocked that she’s saying these things, and its clear she has more confidence in him than he does. Aizawa had offered him daily training to get him onto the same level as the other Class 1-A students, and he’d be joining them the next semester, assuming everything went well. “It’s no guarantee.” He mumbles, wrapping his arms around her torso.

Shinsou felt Y/N swat his back as she pulled away slightly, much to his dismay, “you’re so talented! Of course, he’s gonna let you in.”

She sounded so sure, and Shinsou felt his heart swell with pride.

He moves to speak, only to be interrupted by a passerby, “L/N. Come on, quit hanging out with that freak.” Y/N recognized him, James, he’d bothered Shinsou before, and he’d tried to get Y/N to stop hanging out with Shinsou and been unsuccessful. “He’s just gonna ruin your chances at becoming a pro.”

Y/N pulls away slightly from Shinsou, her brows are furrowed as she moves to confront him, only for Shinsou to grab her arm, shaking his head. “Don’t.”

Turning to glare at the guy, Y/N scoffed, “is this because I rejected you?”

“He asked you out?” Shinsou asked, but Y/N gave him a look that said they’d discuss it later. She could remember the day vividly, he’d asked shortly after she returned from hanging out with Shinsou, telling her she could do so much better, and so much better meant him.

She disagreed. And now Y/N couldn’t help but feel bothered as their argument begins to draw attention from others within the cafeteria, she can see in the corner of her eye that Izuku has come to a stand. Though Iida is grasping his shoulder to try and prevent him from doing anything irrational, they all knew Y/N could stand on her own.

James scoffed at her words, “you probably rejected me because he made you.” The implications were dark, the idea that Shinsou had forced Y/N to befriend him and reject James, though he’d never used his quirk on her and swore he never would.

Shinsou found himself releasing Y/N’s arm, taking a step backwards as he sighed, only for her to grab his hand and yank him closer before taking his face in her hands and kissing him.

She was kissing him.

Oh.

Shinsou’s mind empties as Y/N pulls away, turning back to James as she says, “my boyfriend doesn’t need to make me do anything.” And the boy practically stomps off in frustration, grumbling about Shinsou’s stupid quirk or something of that sort. Not that either of them are paying attention as Y/n brings a hand to the back of her neck awkwardly, searching her mind for an explanation.

“Boyfriend?” His voice is soft, small, and he knows there are other people in the cafeteria but he can’t bring himself to care about their stares.

Y/N turns to him, and she feels her cheeks warm as she tries to avoid his eyes, “well. Only if you want to-”

“I want to.” Shinsou replies too quickly, his cheeks flushing.

Y/N nods, “cool.”

“Cool.”

Izuku can’t help but beam as he watches the interaction, hitting Iida’s arm repetitvely as as he exclaims, “does this mean I’ll be able to study his quirk more?”

Tsu just sighs, “this means we don’t have to listen to her pining anymore.”

TODOROKI SHOUTO

THIS ONE

probably the most relaxed about it, not flustered at all, you tried thoughh

your relationship isn’t really a secret, it’s just that neither of you are that into PDA.

there will be occasional cuddling on the common room couch of the dorms during movie night, but that’s seen as normal to the rest of Class 1-A. during dates, there will be hand holding, a kiss on the cheek, an arm around the shoulder, otherwise most of the intimacy is reserved for your rooms

this lack of PDA is why class 1-A was completely unaware that the two of you were dating,

though you hadn’t tried to hide it, you also hadn’t made it entirely public, you also lowkey thought everyone knew.

mostly because it was so blatantly obvious that shoto was in love with you, but the entire class thought he was unaware of his own feelings and you were just oblivious

oh how wrong they were

you come into class one day and you see shoto and you’re just like lol hi babe and you kiss him, he kisses back, LIKE IT IS THE MOST NORMAL THING

he’s temporarily caught off guard because like i said you two don’t really do PDA, but he digs it, 10/10 would kiss you again in front of everyone, mostly because after all of the CHAOS that this kiss causes, the other boys in the class stop blatantly flirting with you

speaking of chaos

the class erupts into PURE CHAOS

so much yelling and screaming, they are so confused, have fun explaining that one

shoto is equally confused as to why they are confused and you’re just laughing because you knew this would mess with their heads. he ends up getting a little flustered by all the sudden attention the two of you are getting, but maintains his apathetic attitude.

Shoto places his bag beside his desk before pulling his things out one by one to place them onto the desk along with the small cup of coffee. Shoto wasn’t really the coffee type himself, he preferred tea, Y/N on the other hand had an obsession if he was honest. Of course, he enabled this obsession, he liked being the one to bring a smile onto her face.

Yeah, he was whipped.

He could tell when Y/N entered the room because the atmosphere seemed to change entirely, she seemed to brighten everyone’s mood despite how early it was. Greeting their other classmates, she began to move towards him, seeing that he was holding a cup of coffee, Y/N raised a brow. “You drink coffee now?” She asked as she placed her things down.

Shaking his head, Shoto extended the hand with the cup of coffee towards him, “it’s for you.” He explained, small smile on his face.

The rest of their classmates watched the interaction, Kirishima punching Kaminari’s arm as he exclaimed, “so manly!”

Bakugou scoffed from beside the both of them, “if he was really manly then maybe he’d actually ask her out.” Crossing his arms, he averts his eyes from the two, finding the class’s obsession with their relationship a tad ridiculous. Though everyone seemed to be at least slightly invested in the potential outcome at this point.

“Whatever, Bakugo.” Mina says, “L/N has the prettiest boy in class wrapped around her finger- ugh! I want someone to love me like that.” She places her head in her hand, brows furrowing as she stares at the two. Y/N is smiling widely at Shoto, who returns her smile with one of his own.

And then Y/N kisses him. As though this is an everyday thing.

Mina practically jumps out her seat, and though Bakugo would never admit it, his mouth gaped open in shock as she cried out, “did you two just kiss?!”

Shoto’s cheeks are red as they pull away, though his face remains apathetic as he looks to the ground and Y/N replies, “can I not kiss my boyfriend?” She tilts her head in confusion, laughing slightly at the outburst and the clear shock in everyone’s faces.

“Boyfriend?” Hagaruke cried out. “Why didn’t you tell us?!”

Y/N’s brows furrows as she looks to the rest of the astonished class, “did you guys seriously not know? I thought we were obvious, I literally call him by his first name-”

“We thought that was because you two were madly in love with each other but neither could confess!” Momo exclaimed suddenly, her cheeks flaming red at her outburst as she slaps a hand over her mouth.

Mina simply nods in agreement, “exactly! But now he’s buying you coffee and-”

Shoto shakes his head in confusion, “I often buy her coffee, normally she finishes it before we get to class.” He looks to Y/N, a small frown on her face, “today she woke up too late for me to walk her to school so I couldn’t give it to her then-”

“You’re so manly, Todoroki!” Kirishima exclaims, though Shoto simply looks at him in confusion as he removes his hand from Y/N’s waist.

Shrugging, he takes a seat at his desk and Y/N speaks once more, “I just don’t understand how you guys didn’t know.” Standing beside him as he organizes his things while seated, Y/N runs a hand through his hair, and Shoto’s cheeks seemed to redden once more.

“You guys aren’t normally so touchy!” Uraraka has joined the conversation, shock clear in her features.

Shoto nods in agreement, “your behavior today is abnormal, Y/N.”

Now Y/N can feel her cheeks warm as she removes her hand and takes a seat t her desk, “you guys are weird.”

Izuku simply sighs, deflating almost as he watches the interaction and leans over towards Iida, “now I owe Kacchan money.”

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otpnessmess · 4 years

Text

By this sword

Ao3 - Masterlist

Quick thing I made for @mochegato as a way to get rid of writer's block for my jasonette fic. Everyone here is like 17-18 because I obviously don't know what a canon is and will do whatever I please. Based on this post and not beta-d at all. If there are any mistakes I apologize, I wrote and posted this from my phone and the tumblr app is a bitch about formatting. Enjoy!

If Marinette heard Damian and Adrien snicker behind her back once again she would make sure to put salt instead of sugar on their cookies the next day.

The Wayne family had been visiting Paris for a business deal and the two youngest sons had been adamant on having spare time to see the superhero duo of the city.

The year before, the miraculous users had requested help from the Justice League to bring down Hawkmoth, and the Gotham vigilantes were the ones sent to help. Having to work as a team brought the four teenagers together, and they had become very good friends by the time the job was done. Now they kept in contact over calls and video chats and were very good friends… Mostly.

Marinette didn't know why, but Tim didn't seem to like her very much. They had been close while working as heroes but once they started hanging out outside of the masks, his entire demeanor changed.

Due to her usual tardiness, Damian and Adrien had got used to Tim being really talkative with them while they waited. He was always perfectly normal until Marinette finally arrived. He then clammed up for seemingly no reason and, even though he still joined the conversation and laughed along with them, there was tension lodged on his shoulders.

This played out for several outings until Adrien had enough. Even if Mari pretended not to notice it, he knew Tim's behavior was hurting and confusing her, and no matter what she did to try and make amends with him, it seemed like it was never enough. She didn't know what she had done to warrant such a dismissive attitude from the guy who was fighting alongside them just some weeks prior.

His protective instincts kicked in even more when she confessed to him that she had started liking Tim, but was being discouraged by his attitude towards her.

The blonde boy managed to convince Damian to talk to his brother, as he was much more likely to coax something out of him. And it proved to be the right choice.

The youngest Wayne called Adrien in the middle of a laughing fit and it took five minutes to get the information out of him. Tim admitted to being like that because he liked Marinette too, he was just unbelievably shy and accidentally got the wrong message across. Damian couldn't believe his brother could be the greatest detective in the world and the dumbest person in the planet at the same time.

After taking the time to make fun of the black-haired pair, they finally agreed that they had to do something to get those two together because, evidently, they would never be able to do it on their own.

The dynamic duo did try their hardest to help them notice each other's feelings, but they failed so many times they almost called off the mission. The only motivation they had to keep going was the fact that the older Wayne didn't entirely shut off around Mari anymore. They had seen him engage in great conversations with her when she had managed to coax him out of his shell for a bit.

Those moments were short-lived, as Tim took a couple minutes to remember who he was talking to, but worth it in the matchmakers' opinion, so they didn't give up. Which brought them to their latest scheme.

Marinette frowning at them with a rapier in hand was a fairly scary sight, but their plan was foolproof. And even if they didn't manage to get the lovebirds together, at least they would get to laugh for a while.

The idea was simple. Step one: invite the brothers to join their fencing class while they're in Paris and make Marinette lose a bet. Step two: get her to face Tim in a duel and say some carefully chosen words to him as a punishment. Step three: profit.

Damian and Adrien wanted to pat themselves in the back for thinking of this, it was a win-win situation. For them, obviously.

Mari didn't see how this would make Tim want to talk to her more but a bet was a bet, and she was no sore loser. She spotted him standing on one of the mats, watching some of her classmates practicing, and took a deep breath before approaching him.

"Congratulations Tim!"

The boy turned around with a startled expression and accidentally bit his cheek when he saw who it was. "H-huh?"

"We're engaged!"

The bright smile in Marinette's face paired with her words made him pale slightly and almost drop his rapier. "Excuse me- what? I… I-"

"In combat. En garde!" Just like the snickering duo had instructed her she drew her sword from her belt and pointed it at Tim.

She then witnessed the color coming back to his cheeks… And not stopping there. He now resembled a very ripe tomato as he mirrored her stance.

"O-oh, right… That kind of engaged… "

He wasn't expecting her to hear his mumble nor pick up the disappointed undertones in his voice, but it seemed like she had.

Her arm lowered slightly when he said that, and a blush had started to creep up her cheeks as well.

"Uh… Yeah. That kind of engaged. W-why? Did you… Want…?"

What?! Why did she ask that??

In the back you could hear the scheming duo laughing their asses off at their awkward display, which only made them get even more red in the face.

In the meantime, Tim had finally processed her question and immediately panicked. "W-what!? N-no! No way!"

His nervous scoffs weren't very convincing but Mari didn't seem to question them, much likely in an attempt to make the situation fly by as quickly as possible.

Tim seemed to be nervous about what he had said, though, and was looking at her with fear in his eyes. Marinette wished to be able to make it go away so badly, and reassuring him was probably the best way to do it, right?

"Oh good, yeah… Um… Me neither, heh."

She gave a nervous laugh and stole a glance at her friend in front of her, expecting him to appear relieved. Instead, he was barely suppressing a tiny grimace, which made her incredibly confused.

Before she could ponder what she had done wrong, however, Adrien had run out of patience in the back.

"Just kiss already!!"

Oh God, Marinette was going to kill him for sure this time. Why would he even say that? He had just outed her crush in front of the guy she liked!

She gathered every last ounce of strength she had in her before turning to meet eyes with Tim. If she was expecting rejection or disgust in his face, the longing in his eyes caught her off guard.

They crossed gazes for a second, then two, then three.

Searching, questioning.

Then they finally found it.

Understanding transformed their expressions, leaving them to gape at each other.

Oh.

Damien and Adrien were hollering and whistling in the background trying to get their attention, but right now they only had eyes for each other.

Two months later, Adrien would take the credit for being the one that got them together by screaming at them. It would earn him a smack on the head from Damien, who was not about to allow him to simply disregard his interventions and discredit him. On the seats in front of them, Tim and Marinette would chuckle and share a kiss, both laughing at their idiotic friends.

I promise to stop procrastinating and to start working on the next chapter of my fic soon, but I just thought this was such a great prompt! Hope you liked it <3 - Lis

#timari #marinette dupain cheng #maribat #liswrites #tim x marinette #miraculous ladybug #ml x dc

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justloosecannons · 3 years

Text

Finding Out/ Jake ft Eden

when: yesterday where: outs and abouts mentions: n/a description: jake is confronted with the fact that two can play at his game trigger warnings: mentions of body dysmorphia ideals, and sexual acts @partialhearts

Jake:

hooking his thumbs beneath the straps of his backpack, he wiggles just enough to redistribute the weight in it as he let out a hefty sigh. the party from the night before had been wild, and he was lucky to have snuck out in the early hours to catch at least a little rest. before trying to make it over to the coffee shop before his date with addi to get some writing done. crossing the street at the light, its only then that he sees eden. in the same clothes from the party the night before. he's not entirely certain who's place it was, but his heart seems to drop and crack in the pit of his stomach. he freezes, and only steps forward when he's honked at. visibly shaken, he jogs the rest of the way across the street and tries to calm an aching chest. "stupidstupidstupid." he rasps under his breath, knowing he's being unfair by the feeling of jealousy combined with absolute heartache he feels in the confines of his bones.

Eden:

her head is throbbing, and she makes a stop to pick up coffee from the local cafe, hoping that it might somehow help the dull ache in her head. she doesn't see jake until she hears the honk of a car, and her attention is quickly drawn to his direction. she was acting just like him, she knew it, she was stumbling out of the beds of strangers just as jake used to, and she wasn't being subtle about it either. "morning!" she calls, waving over at him casually.

Jake:

hearing her voice, meant that there was absolutely no way out of this impossibly uncomfortable scenario, which only further sent his heart directly into his stomach, only stopping to crumble and break off as it haphazardly hit various inners on the spiral down. a knot forms in his throat, and he quickly clenches his jaw in an effort to not show an ounce of emotion across his features. "hey - i..." he brushes his hand through the air to acknowledge her before he glances around, realizing he would have to walk right by her to get to his chosen spot. letting out a shaky breath, he pushed forward, and avoided eye contact entirely, truly afraid of the minor details that would prove how she had been spending her time. "just.... coffee shop.... gonna.. try to write." his voice cracks, keeping his head down.

Eden:

he's being awkward, and eden is suddenly a little regretful, wishing she hadn't drawn attention to herself, or said hi. is he okay? she's too scared to ask. "oh right, yeah -- okay." he's avoiding her, right? but eden really thought they were doing good, that they were on their way to becoming friends. "i was just on my way there, too."

Jake:

"nice, yeah.... cool." he clears his throat as his eyes stay put on the sidewalk below, suddenly very aware of her proximity and instantly envisioning hands all over the frame that he had once claimed as his own. his eyes lifted for just a moment, and he caught sight of a darkened mark on her neck, and let out a defeated sigh. "cold whisk. kitchen whisk. it'll...." he nodded with his head. "used to have to before i went to work after..." nights with you.

Eden:

she's confused, not sure what it is he is talking about, but then she realises he's talking about her neck and eden claps her hand over the mark with a bright pink flush rising to her cheeks. "oh i - yeah, i'll give that a try when i get home."

Jake:

“sure thing. hope it was nice, at least.” offering the smallest smile in her direction, and an ounce of bite - he nods before he’s turning to heard towards the cafe in question. his heart aches - as if it’s already in pieces and the organ pumping his blood of a foreign object. his fingers grip tightly at the straps of his bag as he lets out a bough that feels strangled.

Eden:

was jake really telling her that he hoped her sex life was good? she clears her throat, feeling a little awkward as they stand there, not really knowing what to say to one another. she decides not to react to the comment, for it will simply do neither of them any good. "i was just gonna get a coffee to you, are you...staying here?"

Jake:

“no i... sorry.” he clears his throat and nearly stumbles as he starts he’s feet up once more. he knows it’s unfair. he knows that he no longer holds claim to anything about eden, which meant that she was essentially a free agent - but, the way it consumed him nearly completely, left him throbbing. the walk felt awkward - which wasn’t them. had never been them, but his mind kept alternating between their last kiss - and... well, her most recent activities. there’s so much he has to say, but nothing comes out. stepping up to the counter, her order tumbled from between his lips right after his own before he has a moment to stop it.

Eden:

she stiffens when he puts in her order, he's being kind, and it ruins her every time. there's something about it that makes her nervous, because will every ever get to be friends? she wishes they could - she wants to be able to take care of him, he deserves that. but does she deserve to hurt again? "i'll get these." she says quickly, adding jake's order to the list before she's handing her card over to pay.

Jake:

the second she’s holding her card out, he’s simply shaking his head and sliding a fistful of cash to the barista. “here - keep the change. thank you.” he hums, taking her card only to carefully slide it into her back pocket. dark eyes search the space before he finds a table, and drops his stuff onto it. he hates it. he hates that he can’t be close to her and not touch her - because he’s desperate, and needy - and he’s never wanted anything more than her.

Eden:

she sighs, sad that jake rejects her attempts to pay, feeling a little depleted as she pushes her card back into her pocket. "is it always going to be like this between us?"

Jake:

it feels like a loaded question as he nods towards the seat across from him. letting out a hefty sigh, his fingers throw themselves through his curls. “it’s just... a little shocking, seeing you out - in last nights clothes and a hickey. just...” he shrugs, not fully prepared to explain that it hurts him.

Eden:

it feels unfair, why does jake get to do all those things and she doesn't? why did he get the double standard? "i'm just having fun - jake - for once in my life i'm just, doing what i want to do." she sighs, "all i've done my whole life is live for everyone else."

Jake:

it falls on his chest like a heavy weight when she speaks. “i-“ he starts, but hears his name. excusing himself, he collects their drinks and deposits them back on the table before glancing up at her again. “i’m not judging you - or telling you what you’re doing is wrong. i...” he sighs, picking at the cup. “i just don’t like it. and i’m not... saying that, that’s fair either..”March 24, 2021

Eden:

"i didn't like it when you told me you loved me and 3 hours later you were fucking some other bitch." she stares at him, hard, her throat tight. does he not see? does he have no idea what he's done to her, the pain he's caused. all the self doubt, the way she hated other women, when women weren't the problem or the enemy. "i hated all of it, i tore myself up because of it. and i'm so fucking sorry, that i have to look for validation in everyone else who isn't you.”

Jake:

the words seem to seep into him in a way that he can't really explain, but he knows that it rocks him to his very core in an instant. he could feel eyes on him immediately - people that overheard her, instantly looking at him. "i didn't... i-" his brows furrowed as his stomach turned, eyes flickering across the space as he tries to put his thoughts into some sort of cohesive statement. "i'm not saying that you're wrong. you are free to do, see, or fuck - whomever you want, eden. i... you aren't my girlfriend anymore. right? you aren't.... you're not mine. and i have to live with that. i'm just saying that you might send the wrong message when you're kissing me, and then fucking someone else - but again, not really any of my business who you fuck. but, i'm super appreciative of the fact that everyone in this god damn coffee shop knows that i'm an asshole. thank you." he huffs, tossing his bag onto his shoulders once more, brushing by her.

Eden:

she stares at jake's back as he pushes by her, and she knows she's confused him by kissing him, she did wrong. but hadn't he? all the times he swore he'd be better, do better, and he didn't. tears burn in her eyes, and she can feel everyone looking at her, at jake, at them, at the mess they had created. she doesn't chase after him, she knows she can't, she doesn't want to cause more of a scene. instead she just clutches her coffee and makes off in the opposite direction, allowing the tears to burn in her eyes.

Jake:

his fingers roughly tangle in wild curls as he makes his way down winding roads. he had only wanted to write - having felt moderately inspired to do so as of late, but his mood was completely shot. note to self: a whole new percentage of the population now hates you. it wasn't that it wasn't deserved, jake was well aware that the errors and careless actions he had taken with eden, had earned him the right to be judged. but, god - did he love her. making his way back into his apartment, he tossed a wave in koda's direction to let him know he was back, before falling back on his bed and pulling the small stuffed animal to his chest as his free hand toyed with the threads from the hold in his jeans.

#jake ft eden #jp.

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mintchocohip · 5 years

Text

sub!bts using their safeword

requested 〉 headcanons for the members using their safeword.

pairing: member x reader | rating: mature | genre: bit of fluff; bit of angst

any additional warnings can be found with each member!

𝘛𝘈𝘌𝘏𝘠𝘜𝘕𝘎

◦ There is very little Taehyung likes to do that requires a safeword. No always means no, and stop always means stop.

◦ On nights when he feels like being a tease, Taehyung’s playful hands slipping between his legs or protecting whatever part of his body you were picking at are accompanied by a smile and a laugh, as he evades your touch―you know how to read his expressions, though, and you know what it means when a smile drops.

◦ Bringing up the possibility of play that needs a safeword cycles Taehyung’s energy between excitement and nerves. It takes him a few days to decide. He settles on a confident buzz. “Yes,” he nods firmly. “I want to use a safeword.”

◦ An edging session is simple, and familiar. Taehyung has been given a new freedom: he can beg you to stop, and let him come. Woozy, ticklish emotions almost fill him with fear that you’ll actually listen—he makes it through thirty minutes on whimpers and denials and gasps filled with amazement that it’s actually working. As you slowly start the motions of finishing him off, a yelp of “Carnation—” stops your hand with shock. Taehyung really does want you to stop—but not for the reasons you expected. “Please,” he’s begging. “Please, don’t let me come.”

◦ Once Taehyung starts using a safeword, it always spills out when you least expect it.

𝘠𝘖𝘖𝘕𝘎𝘐 ‑ warnings: references to intentionally ignored safewords

◦ Safewords and signals are sacred to Yoongi. He needs to know that he has a way out.

◦ If a partner doesn’t respect his safeword, Yoongi cuts off connections with barely restrained hatred. He isn’t interested in healing that level of broken trust.

◦ Too much safeword talk can scare a new partner. Yoongi knows that. He knows that reassurances he never uses it carelessly sound hollow. When he’s with somebody who knows him well, Yoongi also knows that he can use his safeword without having to shrug off judgement that he’s being oversensitive.

◦ Degradation play hits too real. Or; Yoongi hears his real name when he’s only supposed to be called a collection of pet names that don’t even hint at Min Yoongi. Late in a scene, good pain has become very, very bad pain. Whatever the reason is, if he’s been thrown out of the right headspace, Yoongi does his best to force dry lips into enunciating “Pozidriv”. He doesn’t place blame. He just needs to take a breather, and finish quieting down with some mutual admiration.

◦ When he’s ready to talk, you ask Yoongi a question. “What made you say the safeword?” Usually, both of you know the reason. Both of you know it’s okay if he doesn’t feel like answering right now, too. Still. It matters. It matters to you―and nothing makes Yoongi feel more loved than knowing that it matters.

𝘑𝘜𝘕𝘎𝘒𝘖𝘖𝘒

◦ Jungkook doesn’t feel guilty about using his safeword. He feels frustrated.

◦ Bars of his current favorite song hum against the gag right when the final zipper is pulling up. You slowly unhug Jungkook’s body from the immobilizing restraints, and prepare for grumpiness, or tears.

◦ Offering Jungkook comfort objects followed by comfort kinks helps him work through the frustration. He’s wanted something so intensely―he wanted to try this so much―and even if he understands that he did the right thing, he hates that he had to ruin his own fantasy.

◦ Safewording out early in play is easy for Jungkook. Safewording out when he’s in deep is nearly impossible.

◦ When Jungkook is that deep, you’re the one using the safeword.

◦ The signs that Jungkook needs the scene to ease into an ending are blaring. His normally brief short-circuits don’t fade. He’s slurring through pleads for permanent damage despite the scene not establishing that kind of dirty talk; he can’t make eye contact through a haze of rolling eyes and shakes―or, he’s just so stricken from a stun that he couldn’t say the safeword if he wanted to.

◦ Despite how obvious his needs for the safeword are, Jungkook is always surprised when his partners use it. In the days after the numbness and nerves of subdrop have faded enough for him to realize it was the right thing to do, Jungkook is a little giggly and flustered when he realizes how safe it really makes him feel.

𝘏𝘖𝘚𝘌𝘖𝘒

◦ A safeword is comforting. A safeword is fun. It’s a piece of power Hoseok holds on to when everything else is stripped. Even when he isn’t in the mood to explore fantasies that push him to a point where clear communication would be impossible, Hoseok likes knowing that “Woodstock” won’t get lost on moans.

◦ A safeword is an accessory, and Hoseok simply likes having it in his bedroom collections.

◦ The moment you start using a safeword with Hoseok, however, he either uses it far too easily, or he doesn’t use it when he should.

◦ Frustratingly, when Hoseok is experiencing something new, the safeword is a synonym for “Ouch!” or “That feels weird.” Encouragement to use the color system gives his levels of surprise a little more clarity.

◦ If his feet are on the ground, Hoseok uses his safeword easily. If he’s high enough in subspace that he can’t touch back down on his own, Hoseok needs to appease his partner in every way―and using the safeword feels like insubordination. When everything is “green”, discomfort Hoseok enjoys during lighter play might sting harsher, but his devotion has to be treated carefully.

𝘑𝘐𝘔𝘐𝘕

◦ In the bedroom, Jimin’s play style keeps things simple. He means what he says.

◦ Acting bratty is the only time Jimin hints towards denying his heart. When he does, brattiness is a blatant wash down his body. A firm, flat “Wait. Not that.” or a hand waving into the air aren’t part of that push and pull body language. Taking a break without breaking up play allows a distinct smile to spread back over Jimin’s face, and puts that distinct tilt back into his hips.

◦ Play that is entered outside of the bedroom―through physical cues, and questioning shifts in touch and tone―is rougher terrain. Spontaneous punishments in an alleyway or in the middle of a crowded dancefloor are hits, or misses. “Swan” makes those misses crystal clear.

◦ Semi-public displays of domination and dirty talk over text are Jimin’s safeword comfort zones.

◦ Detailing every little thing you’re going to do if Jimin keeps up the behavior that’s been pushing your limits all week leads to radio silence, before Jimin is sending you a swan emoji―he loves the dirty talk, but right now his soul is a little sore, and he wants some praise to cure it.

𝘕𝘈𝘔𝘑𝘖𝘖𝘕

◦ The safeword hurts Namjoon less than formulating rejection. At the same time, he rarely feels the need for it. Namjoon can take a lot, and he gives up his boundaries willingly.

◦ Overwhelmed smiles at unexpected praise during aftercare are twitching, and shifting, and Namjoon is almost laughing as he swallows hard and whispers out “Orthogon.” You nod. “Too much?” Namjoon nods back. “Yeah.” You kiss his forehead, and ask what he would prefer.

◦ Emotional boundaries are marked off by Namjoon’s safeword.

◦ He loves it when partners play off his shy body language. Namjoon takes pain silently. Those two facts can make reading his body language difficult. Namjoon doesn’t find his safeword necessary unless his emotions are suddenly shocked, sad, lonely, or hurt, and he knows addressing the issue immediately is necessary. Little touches, sips of water, and cooldown periods make sure he isn’t getting physically overwhelmed in ways he wouldn’t safeword for even if he could.

◦ Namjoon loves telling partners why he used his safeword. Whether he was overwhelmed, underwhelmed, or just caught off guard, he isn’t afraid to admit it. If he isn’t giving a reason, he doesn’t want to explain himself. He doesn’t know his own reasons, and he values that uncertainty quietly.

𝘚𝘌𝘖𝘒𝘑𝘐𝘕 ‑ warnings: references to consent play

◦ Jokingly whining “Kathmandu” when you’re about to beat him at a game or offering him a spoonful of your attempt at yuxiang eggplant earns Seokjin a long look, before a few smothering tickles wipe that crooked smile off his face. When he automatically breathed out the safeword at a moody airport customs officer, though, Seokjin comes pouting to you for comfort.

◦ Seokjin is almost too lazy to incorporate the safeword into conversation, but he manages. Nudging “elephants don’t live in Kathmandu, do they?” towards you with a laugh puts your hands back into your pockets. 24/7 play keeps Seokjin guessing, but the savanna exhibit at the zoo isn’t the time or place to check the color of his panties.

◦ If Seokjin is turned on to the point of wordlessness, in too much pain, or panicking at the wrong thing, he prefers alternatives to a safeword. One syllable of that word is enough to invade his subpsace with anxiety.

◦ A love of telling you how much it hurts and denying everything when he’s being a lazy brat doesn’t keep Seokjin’s safeword close. He rarely needs to, but when he does, he mutters something that fractures the dirty talk, or signals too much, give me a moment.

◦ Seokjin safewords out of a scene when he needs to hand all of his emotions over to his partner. Soft guidance into a nap wakes him up with a flippant attitude. It’s a coping mechanism. He tells himself he doesn’t care if your flippancy matches his; even when he grits his teeth through unbidden shivers and whispering out that it wasn’t that bad. It takes him a few times to gather the confidence to admit he wants to shut down, and be coddled and congratulated and nuzzled in thankfulness that he spoke up.

#sub!bts #domme!reader #member x reader #ot7 post #sub!taehyung #sub!yoongi #sub!jungkook #sub!hoseok #sub!jimin #sub!namjoon #sub!seokjin #mch #headcanon

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wolfpawn · 5 years

Text

Life is a Game of Risks, Chapter 48

Chapter Summary - Alexianna is considering Daniel's words when she receives some mail that shocks her. Luckily Tom, though away, is there via the phone to listen to her and offer advice

TRIGGERS - Past domestic abuse, Past emotional abuse, Past sexual abuse.

Previous Chapter

Tags: @damalseer @hiddlesbitch1 @winterisakiller @theoneanna

Request if you wish to be tagged

For longer than she cared to admit, Alexianna considered Daniel's comments regarding Oliver.

She could not comprehend how Daniel would welcome the man back into his life after he abandoned them when they needed a father. She thought to her counselling sessions, the ones specifically regarding the male influences and indeed role models in her life, or as was brutally honest, the severe lack of said role models. There was a correlation between her lack of father figure and her subsequent relationship with Jonathan in which she had accepted abusive and negative behaviour from him. It was not the sole reason, which she knew, but it was a notable part of the overall picture.

Tom, on more than one occasion, pointed out that Daniel was simply the polar opposite of her reaction to the situation, and in many ways, also understandable. He more than likely was hoping to make up for the lost relationship with his father during childhood. Both approaches, he stated diplomatically, were completely comprehensible and neither sibling was in any way wrong for their feelings on the matter.

Daniel spoke to her a bit with regards what he and Oliver discussed when they met up, Oliver, now living in York, went to Edinburgh when Daniel was off the ships to talk with his son. Alexianna listened to her brother but never said much on the matter. When Daniel pushed her for an answer as to whether she wished to speak to their father or not, Alexianna would find a way to change the topic of conversation with him and on mentioning Hampstead Hill, she would find a reason to cease speaking altogether.

Lily was no longer having the same issues with Shawn, thankfully, but she was still not overly happy with her daughter's teacher and neither was her teacher pleased with her and it was showing. It left Alexianna in something of a predicament, she wanted Lily to have the best education but she was terrified at what Oliver would expect in return. Then she thought of Tom's offer. In all honesty, of the two, she would be more open to Tom's proposal to pay than her father's as she knew that Tom was offering out of love for Lily and genuine concern for her wellbeing and love, Oliver's motives were anyone's guess as far as she was concerned.

She spoke with her counsellor regarding it in her next session. He delved into it all with her and attempted to assist her in uncovering what was bothering her so greatly in the situation. They both knew her father's lack of being there for her growing up was a pinnacle reason for her wariness to everything, but Mr Barrow also tried to see if there were other reasons for it, noting her anger at her father's remarrying, not because she held any ill against him for finding happiness but for the fact he chose a wife that specifically chose not to have children. She respected that was a personal choice for her stepmother, a term that her therapist used and caused her to shudder such were her preconceived notions of such a title, but it caused her to wonder if her father regretted being a father and made her feel rejected even further by him. It was hurtful enough that Oliver left them and never returned due to not wanting to deal with Marie but the idea he had never wanted children, that made her feel even more rejected by him and of course, behind it all, she worried for Lily.

Tom left for a week to deal with an event he was part of, leaving Alexianna to deal with her concerns, work and Lily, something she was becoming more comfortable and confident in. Even with the increased workload of her job and college course, Alexianna was finding it easier to do everything as a result of her dealing with her past and feeling better in herself as a person. She still had doubts, her scarred arm caused her to feel some self-conscious thoughts but overall, her achievements, her loving relationship with a man that allowed her to be her own person and respected her personal space and expected the same and help to raise Lily meant she was able to grow, both personally and as a mother. She always loved Lily with all of her heart but did not show it as much as she wanted to as she tried to learn how to love herself and express it. Her happier attitude transferred to her interactions with Lily also.

While going home from work on the bus, she looked out the window. Elena, a lovely English language student who needed a few hours work while she completed her course, had become Lily's new minder while Alexianna worked. Tom spent what time he could with her also but there was a need for someone else to pick up the times they could not and Elena was perfect since Rebecca moved to Manchester. She also taught a very eager Lily some Spanish, something Alexianna was delighted about. She spoke French and Latin as well as English and Welsh so she liked her daughter embracing foreign languages.

When she arrived home, she was attacked for hugs in the hallway. “Hey, Princess.”

“Hi Mommy.” Lily cuddled into her as she walked into the kitchen carrying her daughter in her arms. “I had a silly day today.”

“Tell me about it.” She smiled as she said a quick hello to Elena also.

“We went to the park.”

Alexianna knew that already, having signed a consent form for her daughter to be allowed do so. “And what did you see in the park?”

“Ducks.”

“Very exciting.”

“Can I tell Daddy?”

“I will contact him and see if he able to talk.” She smiled, taking out her phone, frowning at the cracked screen, having been in a slight disagree with gravitational pull. She texted Tom and left her phone on the counter as she took out the few groceries she had acquired also before thanking Elena for handing her some post. At first, she scanned them, some junk mail, a “to the occupier” from the council and finally a letter for “The parents of Lily D. Hughes” letter. Alexianna looked at the letter for a moment. It was a thick A4 size one but it was the postmark that gave it away. The stamp of the illustrious girl's school told her who sent it. Opening it, she wondered why it had arrived.

Just as she was about to remove the paperwork from the package, her phone rang.

“Mommy, Daddy is calling.” Lily chirped as Alexianna placed down the letter. She lifted her daughter onto the countertop and answered the phone, placing it to Lily's ear. “Daddy.” She giggled.

“Hello, Princess. You sound very happy.”

“I miss you, Daddy.”

“I miss you terribly too. I wish I was able to give you a big cuddle.” Tom's voice was sincere. “Tell me about your day.”

“We went to the park and we sawed ducks.” She informed him. “And we feeded them, but not bread acause that is not good for them, Daddy and I sawed doggies and they were chasing each other and we had so much fun.” She informed him.

“I am jealous.” Tom declared, earning giggles from Lily. “Are you excited for your birthday next week?”

“Yes.” Lily cheered loudly. “You'll be home, won't you Daddy?”

“I am home in two days, my beautiful girl.” He promised. “So do not fret, I will be there.”

“Yay!”

“Where's your Mum, Princess?”

“She's holding the phone to my ear and making sure that I don't fall from the counter, Daddy.” Lily informed him.

“Okay, Princess, I will send you a big hug and kiss through Baloo and I will just talk to Mummy for a minute, alright?”

"Okay, Daddy. Bye bye, I love you.”

“I love you too, Lily.” His smile was audible through the phone.

Alexianna let Lily off the counter before putting the phone to her ear. “Hey, Tom.”

“Darling, is everything alright?”

“I'm not sure.”

“Talk to me, Lexi. Is it therapy, work?”

“No, I just...I think Lily has just received another prospectus from Hampstead Hill.”

“You think?”

“I was opening it when you called, but yes, I think she has, it looks like one.”

“Open it and see.” Tom listened to the sound of paper moving around then silence. “Lexi?”

“I…”

“Lexi?”

“Dear Ms Hughes, we are delighted that your daughter, Lily Diana Hughes will be joining us in Hampstead Hill at the beginning of her reception year, this coming September. We thank you for choosing our school for your daughter's education and I can assure you, Hampstead Hill will endeavour to bring out the very best in your child. Please find enclosed….Did you do this?” There was no answer. “Tom, did you do this?”

“No... I...no, I had nothing to do with this.” Tom promised, slightly startled by what Alexianna had just read to him. “Do you think Oliver…?”

“Who else could have done it, Tom?” she challenged, her anger increasing. “I am going to kill Daniel.”

“Why?”

“How else would this have happened, Tom? Oliver shouldn't know her name, I...does he have my address?” She asked worriedly, rushing up the stairs to prevent Lily hearing such a conversation, not wanting the little girl to see her stress.

“Alexianna, I don't want to anger you, Darling, but I don't think him having your address requires such panic, he is not as bad as Jonathan.” Tom placated. “If you want nothing to do with him, it's not ideal, but it's not like he can walk up to the front door; you, Elena or I have to let him in, so don't fret, my Darling. Also, remember the school hàve your address, I was in contact with them, remember?”

“But...you gave your address.”

“I gave yours also, they needed it, so he could very well not know it.” He placated. “I think when you have settled slightly, you need to speak to Daniel.” He suggested.

“Yeah, I...I'm not sure about this, Tom. I don't want to owe Oliver for anything...I don't want anything to do with him.”

“We will talk to Daniel, and see what he says, alright?” Tom urged. “But for now, relax.”

“Tom…”

“Lexi, you are annoyed and you and I know that if you talk to Daniel now, you will get angry and you love your brother, you don't want to argue with him.”

“I don't want this. I don't want Oliver to pay for this.”

“Will I send him a reimbursement?” Tom offered.

“No because I don't want anyone paying this money for her.”

“Why not, Darling?”

“Because it's not fair on you, I am not going out with you to fund Lily, this relationship is uneven enough without…”

“Okay, I am going to have to stop you there, Lexi “ Tom stated calmly. “A relationship does not have to be fifty-fifty when one is in a different financial position to another. You give me so much, I cannot put into words my happiness when I am with you, and that little girl. Alexianna, I love you both so intensely and you both give me unconditional love and respect in return and to be honest, I feel unworthy. Your additions to my life have so much more than financial worth.”

“But I don't want money from you, I want you, I want our cuddles, our conversations, our intimacy, that sort of thing.”

“That is why I am so invested in this, Lexi, because you don't want money and other such things. But is why I am so willing to do this too, I want to help Lily achieve everything she can in life.”

Alexianna sighed, uncertain of what to say. She wanted nothing more than to have Lily have the best of everything, as most parents would, but uncertain that she could take it.

#Life is a Game of Risks #chapter 48 #tom hiddleston #tom hiddleston fic

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thephantomofthe-internet · 6 years

Text

Pernicies (Eros p.t. 11)

Billy Hargrove x Reader, Jonathan Byers x Reader (Unrequited)

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13 Part 14 Part 15 Part 16

Word count: 3314

Warnings: swearing, drinking, sadness

Author’s Note: I’m having way too much fun with this, that is all

Permanent Tag: @hotstuffhargrove @denimjacketkisses @steveharringtonofficial @flamehairedwritings @flamehairedwritings @nistaposebno @hargroovin

Series Tag: @hargrovesgoldilocks @wtf-richarddd @sighsophiia @baebee35 @ijustwantahugfromtennant @rhyxn @wearemightyghosts @toriasaysso @random-stupid-stuffs @so-not-hotmess @warsintothestars @lilmissperfectlyimperfect @angellastor @aaliyonte @baileythepenguin @sleepyspacegal @kingbouji3 @abbyed

You and Billy didn’t speak until Vicki Matthews’ eighteenth birthday party, three weeks later. During that time, you divided your days equally between Jonathan and your friends. You spent more and more time at Barb’s grave, which gave your comfort and a sense of her still being with you. You imagined her ghost holding you as you wrote her silent letters in a journal you’d bought shortly before it was announced that she’d been killed by Hawkins Labs. It was a nice for two reasons-one, it was quiet, as cemeteries often are, and two, Billy didn’t know where it was, hell he didn’t even know about Barb, that was one area you kept private. Sitting in the silence each afternoon, in the bitter cold, you felt as though the plot was calm in an ever present storm. It was better than being home where everything felt like a wake, except the memorialized was still alive and haunting the halls. Here, you felt like you didn’t have to be strong all the time, if you needed to cry it was okay, there was no judgement. You didn’t believe in any one type of afterlife and ghosts weren’t exactly something you thought much about, but you knew her energy was there, holding you and keeping you company.

This was the longest you’d gone without talking to Billy. When you fought, which seemed to be often, you almost always made up. And Billy certainly had tried, he’d been haunting your locker and outside your classes for weeks, but every time you got close, he’d leave. It was almost a game of cat and mouse, except you weren’t chasing back. It seemed Billy couldn’t decide if he was the cat or the mouse, chasing and running wild. It was disconcerting, but you knew him too well. He wanted to apologize or at least talk, but his pride acted like a wall and he couldn’t pass by it. He needed you to come to him, to bypass his walls and make him feel he was in the right and his effort was noticed. But this time you couldn’t submit to his feeble vanity. He’d hurt you too much this time. He was a hypocrite and if he couldn’t admit to it, you wouldn’t force him to.

But just because you and Billy weren’t talking, didn’t mean Valerie stopped talking to you. In fact, it was the exact opposite-she wouldn’t leave you alone. Every day as you headed towards Stacy and Freddie, she’d grab your arm and try to force you over to her and Billy’s table. You knew this was for two reasons; one, she wanted you two to make up, and two, if you were there then she had an excuse to not let Billy feel her up over the meatloaf. Every single time you refused, stating the same reason:

“I’m not in the mood to be your pathetic third wheel.” You’d say, parroting Billy’s cruel word. Valerie would always come up with an apology and a cheap reassurance that you weren’t a third wheel, but you never listened.

Today, however, was different. As Valerie grabbed you to force you around and you tried to rip your arm away, crying out “Val, you know as well as I do that this isn’t going to happen.” She led you not to Billy’s now infinitely more empty table, but over to Carol and Tina and Vicki Matthews, who all seemed deep in plans.

“I’m not gonna make you sit with sad sack Hargrove, relax, I’m gonna let you in on the biggest secret of the year.” She said, forcing you onto the bench seat next to Tina as she squeezed in next to Vicki. “Even Jodie doesn’t know about this.” She said, as if to prove how secret this was.

Carol slid a sheet of portrait sized paper over to you, written on in purple and pink pen, bubble letters framing the title ‘Vicki’s super secret birthday bash’. Underneath was a rough map of Vicki’s house and the address.

“Intriguing, so what makes me so special that I get to know about this?” you asked, reading over the poorly drawn map, noting the exits and closed off rooms.

“We aren’t smart.” Vicki said simply, earning several slaps and hushes from her friends, silencing her.

“What Vicki means to say is that we need help planning this thing, we aren’t exactly planners.” Carol said, tapping the map.

“All we need is a swift backup plan, in case what happens at Val’s thing happens here.” Tina added with a shrug.

“So…you want to know how to not get the police called on you?” you asked, squinting at the map.

“No, Val got in so much shit with her parents when they came home, the house was a mess.” Carol replied smoothly.

“Oh, well that’s easy. Hand me a pen.” You said, earning grins from girls as they began their own planning.

By Wednesday morning, you’d sold all of Jonathan’s photos back to their owners for increasingly high rates based on their incriminating nature and by that night everything was set for the perfect party, complete with cleanup plan and a very strong backup plan for if the neighbours called the police on them. On Thursday, the invitations were handed out and Valerie was already trying to get you to come to her place to get ready, promising a ride there if you did. You declined the offer, only because it came with a hinted at addition of Billy. You promised you’d call her if you had any problems with getting ready, which she laughed off, declaring that if you could pull off your perm every day, you could handle dressing for a party. You didn’t tell her that you might not come at all.

Finding Jonathan nowadays was easy, generally he was seeking you out too. On Friday afternoon, with a flyer in hand, you waited for him in backstage as Kristy Swanson stumbled through her fifth attempt at Juliet’s balcony monologue. When he finally did arrive, he looked nervous, more so than usual.

“Hey…you whispered, pulling him into the darkest corner you could find, nodding to your stage manager, Robin, to turn a blind eye to the whole situation.

“Hey.” He returned, his lips connecting with the curve of your neck, pressing feather light kisses up your neck and over your jaw with the focus and determination of someone trying to become chess champion of the world.

“You coming to Vicki’s thing tonight?” you asked, your hands wrapping around him as you dragged your nails over his spine, making him either shiver or cringe.

“Haven’t decided yet…” he muttered into your hair, pushing your hips into his.

“You should, it’ll be fun.” You replied.

“Will Nance be there?” he asked, pulling away to look at you.

You shrugged “Maybe, I haven’t seen her much anymore. Not since the whole fallout with Steve again.” You replied.

Jonathan hummed. You both knew that Nancy got rejected by Steve for Vicki Matthews, a very embarrassing moment for all involved. You hadn’t discussed this with Nancy, nor with Jonathan as you didn’t know if it would be a good plan.

“I’ll be there.” He said and you rushed to hand him the flyer as your director finally called Kristy to stop and sent her offstage in a huff, which you’d need to protect her royal blue velour dress from, already having to sacrifice the headpiece to her wrath, watching her toss it to the ground.

“I gotta go, but I’ll see you there, okay?” you said, pressing a kiss to his stubbly cheek and rushing off to follow behind Kristy, snatching her hat off the floor and nodding to Robin to warn the other stage managers of her. You didn’t have the immediate luxury of waiting for his response, if she ruined that dress then your school would owe Haven Point’s professional theatre about eight hundred dollars in damages, money you knew the drama club didn’t have.

You ended up getting to leave rehearsal at eight thirty, due to Kristy’s lack of memorization skills and temper tantrums. You managed to fix your hair in between scenes, thank god for the endless supply of hairspray in the makeup crew’s supply. Climbing into your car in the dark, you wished you lived closer to everything. You rushed home as fast as you could.

Getting ready was a hassle now that Valerie had a standard for you to hit. You threw on bright magenta dress you’d picked for its ruffled skirt and long sleeves, the only reason Valerie had even agreed to get it was the low back and the length of the skirt on you. You added to your makeup, choosing silver eye shadow and a moody purple lip. You rushed out the door before your father could stop you waving goodbye and climbing into your car, speeding to Vicki’s comfortable home, a safe distance between yours and Valerie’s.

The party was just starting to get interesting when you arrived, it had already been on for an hour, everyone who was there was drunk or getting there. The well plotted living room was crammed with drunken kids. The whole thing looked lively. You hadn’t seen Valerie or Billy yet, but that seemed like a good thing. Stacy and Freddie were having a heated conversation in a corner, seemingly both unhappy and horny. Vicki and Steve were dancing in the middle of the room, so sickeningly happy looking at them made you feel like you were getting a cavity. You were happy for both of them, Steve finally looked happy since his breakup with Nancy and word on the street said that he chose Vicki over her when given his second chance, a rare sign of growth for such a vapid boy. You were very happy with the idea of people watching for the whole night, you almost wish you had a camera to document the whole thing in all its debaucherous glory.

You hardly gotten one drink in you before Tina and Macy had grabbed onto you, pulling you into the living room again, crying over the thumping music “That hoe! Look at her!”

There stood Nancy and Jonathan in the middle of the room, kissing like actors did in the movies, slowly and softly with a sort of languid, gentle passion that burned like a warm fireplace on cold winter’s night.

Macy shoved a shot into your hand, turning to you with glazed over eyes and a face that looked to be sympathetic. “Fuck him, he’s a dickhead and she’s a whore, you can do so much better, my boyfriend has a single older brother I can tooootally set you up with-” she rambled and you nodded, taking the shot in a single gulp, your head snapping to follow the sound of screams of both terror and excitement. You found yourself pushing your way into the crowd and once close enough you saw two worrying things.

One, Billy was beyond pissed and stalking off towards to nearest exit.

And two, Valerie was sucking that tiny sophomore’s dick in the middle of Vicki’s party.

You had to go. You had to check on Billy. You rushed to follow him out.

He wasn’t quick on his feet, in fact he was insanely slow and off balance. He was definitely drunker than he’d like to admit and you were more than in the right to take away his keys. You wished that Tina hadn’t laughed of your idea of having a sober key master of sorts to collect keys and not relinquish them to those too drunk to drive. Now you had to save his drunk ass.

“Y/N wait!” a voice called out behind you. For a second, you almost thought it was Valerie, trying to stop you or him or maybe both. But you knew the voice well enough to know that this was only going to end up being a distraction.

Nancy and Jonathan were chasing after you, both wearing anxious, guilty expressions. You stopped for them, waiting to hear whatever they had to say so you could get out.

“Y/N I am so sorry I didn’t mean to steal him away again and-” Nancy started, only to be immediately be cut off by Jonathan.

“And I’m sorry if I led you on I didn’t mean to I just-”

“I just really like Jonathan and-” Nancy started

“I just really like Nance.” and Jonathan finished. If it wasn’t so sickeningly sweet you’d think it was planned.

You looked from the pair of them and back to Billy, who was still humbling between the half finished beer in one hand and his keys in the pocket of his tight jeans. You grabbed them each by the hands, leaning in to smile at them.

“Look, I’m not upset, I knew you were into each other. Be happy, be together, you have my blessing or whatever. Mazel tov!” you said, letting them go and rushing off.

“But…” Nancy called, bewildered and very clearly uncomfortable.

“Mazel tov!” you waved, rushing to Billy. You got there just as he got the keys out of his pocket and you snatched them away.

“What the fuck…” Billy growled, dropping his drink to the ground and reaching out for his keys.

“Ah ah.” You said, pulling them quickly out of his reach “You’re not driving anywhere, not this drunk.”

“Y/N, back down.” He warned, his glare loose and sloppy instead of tough and hard as it usually was.

“Now, if you want to leave, I’m driving you. You can stay, if you want, but you’re not getting these back.” You jingled the keys in his face for emphasis before pocketing them.

“You’re not driving my car…” he muttered to the grass.

“Alright, then we can take mine, but I wouldn’t leave my car here if I was you. You know how bad Tommy wants to screw someone in the back of a sports car.” You reminded him, nodding towards his royal blue baby with its driver’s side window permanently rolled down.

Billy groaned, nodding softly “You’re right…” he admitted, heading towards the passenger side door. “If you get one scratch on Sheila I’m killing you.” He warned.

“You named your car Sheila?” You giggled, watching as he turned red; no sober man would ever admit their car’s name that loudly and you both knew it. Billy didn’t respond, only adding to the humour in the whole situation. You chose not to press him on the subject, climbing into the driver’s seat.

You’d only driven stick shift once, when your father had to physically hold your mother in the backseat when she’d tried to hurt herself again. That was over a year ago and you felt shaky on the controls, but now you’d made your bed so you had to lie in it. You turned on the ignition and put the car in gear, reversing out of Vicki’s street, shifting gears and pushing forward, trying your damndest to not grind the clutch into dust. Billy’s head had lulled against the seat, his eyes shut tightly into a permanent grimace.

“You know…” you tried “I’m really proud of you tonight, you didn’t even leave a mark on that kid, and I know you really wanted to.”

“Val wouldn’t like it…” Billy muttered, not bothering to try to hide his disdain.

“Yeah well I think Val got enough of what she wanted tonight.” You replied, turning off of Vicki’s street and down one of the main roads.

“She was just drunk…” Billy said, his grimace turning into a scowl and his head unconsciously turned to you, his eyes still shut tight.

You knit your brow “You don’t need to defend her, Bee.” You said, watching him from the rear view mirror.

“Yes I do…” he replied gruffly.

“No you don’t, Bill,” you sighed “She cheated on you, she did you wrong, you don’t have to defend her.”

“Yes I do.” He pressed, nearly growling.

“Why?” you demanded.

“Because I love her!” he cried, his eyes snapping open, wide and red. Only now it was obvious to you that he wasn’t angry, he was as close to heartbreak as he’d ever been in his whole life. “I love her and she loves me and I know that we’re gonna be fine.” He breathed, nodding as though you had said it.

And in that moment, you had two options, both of which would break his heart. You could tell him what you saw or what you felt he could understand. You chose the latter.

“You don’t love her.” You replied, keeping your eyes on the road. You couldn’t bear to look at his face. You knew that what you’d just said would hurt him, but it had to be said.

“Yes I do.” Billy said and without even looking at him, you knew he’d crossed his arms over his chest, his jaw clenched tight and teeth grinding.

“No, you don’t Bill.” You pressed, your voice softer and kinder than before.

“How the fuck do you know how I feel?” he snapped.

“If you loved her, you’d be there, handling this. You would’ve knocked out that stupid sophomore and dealt with the aftermath. You wouldn’t be sitting here with me.” You explained.

“You forced yourself into this! I wanted to go home, take a breather, and handle this later.” He cried “And since when do you know anything about being in love anyway?”

You huffed “I know about love.”

Billy rolled his eyes “Oh yeah sure, sure you know all about it. With your stories and your books and the creepy way you watch people! Newsflash, sweetheart, that isn’t understanding love, that’s being a pathetic creep and-” he was ranting, well more rambling drunkenly at you. But it still stung, like salt rubbed into an open wound.

You felt tears begin to well in your eyes and, if only to get him to shut up, if only to keep yourself from crying. “I’m in love with you, you absolute asshole! You stupid, short sighted, senseless, careless, awful man! I love you. So you don’t get to say shit.” You cried, pumping the brakes roughly and turning off the engine.

Billy laughed. No, laughed wasn’t the right word, he guffawed. He laughed like you were the funniest person on earth; it came deep from his stomach and echoed throughout the cramped space. You thought he couldn’t hurt you anymore more than he had thus far, you’d sworn he’d already torn your heart from your chest and stomped on it. But this was the final blow, the knockout punch to any of the belief he could ever reciprocate your feelings and the last shreds of your already torn apart confidence. You had been the most vulnerable you could be with him and he laughed. Hot tears began to slip down your cheeks and you were quick to brush them away as you pulled the keys from the ignition, pocketing them again.

“I fucking hate you. And now you’re stuck here. Come find your keys when you’re sober and less of an asshole, if you can ever figure that part out.” You snapped with the last of your unshaken breath before you forced the door open and then yourself out into the cold night air.

Billy watched you, gaping like a fish; he hadn’t thought you were serious. He thought this was some stupid joke that was laughable. But as he saw your spirit break and your ego fall away, he was hit all at once in the heart. You loved him and left him stuck far too big in the pit of emotional quicksand you’d left behind. As you marched off into the night, you left him stuck and stewing, a tornado in his mind ripping through his soul.

He was so fucked.

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