May 14, 2024 • Tuesday

--- Days of Productivity [4/10] ---

When you push yourself to your limit, and then push yourself a little more— don't do that. It's a bad idea.

First lab session of the semester today, we had a terrible time. None of the systems had Java installed so the whole of the 3 hours went in confused lecturers figuring out how to install Java (why is my uni like this)

Anyway, I overexerted myself a little today, which is inevitable because I have SO MUCH TO STUDY. Hopefully I can get a break after my exams and not be piled up with assignments (manifesting 🤞)

🎧 Peter — Taylor Swift

I started off in college as an education major wanting to be a middle school science teacher, but ended up quitting that because of how ableist the major was.

I switched to an agriculture degree because I grew up on a farm, and during 2020 I was constantly at home and convinced myself I could physically do the work, and I completed that degree despite the professors being ableist and morally questionable.

While I was an Ag major, I was working for the geology museum on campus, and decided to get my Masters degree in museum studies. During my studies, I realized how disabled people are constantly left out of deai discussions in the museum field, only ever seen as potential visitors and never potential workers, and so I finished my degree with independent research into how disabled staff are treated.

During my last semester in grad school, I started working as a substitute teacher and realized that my education major professors were wrong; I as a disabled person can totally be a teacher without a problem. My grad school advisor also told me that a lot of myself professionals go back and forth between the school system and museums. So I'm taking the leap to try to become a teacher

I just took my GACE (the Georgia certification test) and passed at a professional level! Once I am hired by a school, I will start taking the remainder of classes that I need to be considered a full fledged teacher

I've literally just made a circle, but the agriculture and museum studies degrees are still a huge help to me as a science educator. Other than space, agriculture perfectly set me up to understand everything required for students to learn and places me in a good spot to introduce an FFA chapter to the school, while my museum studies degree has allowed me to see education from a different perspective than my coworkers in order to more adequately come up with ideas in joint discussions. Additionally, I included disability and deai research in almost everything I did from work to school, and as a disabled person myself, I feel that my understanding of accessibility and empathy for other disabled people has prepared me more for interacting with disabled students in my classes.

Not a single bit of my journey was for naught, and I no longer feel ashamed or regretful towards my agriculture degree. I'm also excited to continue learning and eventually helping others to learn too

21/02/24

My vertigo has been killing me since yesterday but I managed to complete most of my to-dos! Most of them because the psychical ones have been impossible to do. Today when my mum comes home I’ll get to it so I don’t get koed by my symptoms.

Declutter my laptop and make space for the new semester

Do my annual digital security load

Prepare a Percy Jackson rpg one shot for some friends

Organize and clean my room

If I complete it later maybe I’ll check in here to let you know. Until then, stay safe <3

I want to start posting again, so here I am .

100 Days of Productivity (2/100)

February 5th 2024

Today was very exhausting. just. in general. I slept all day by accident and also mmm chronic fatigue. but! I’m up doing stuff. I really need to fix my sleep schedule but I’m at least sleeping before 3am. A true feat in mintchigan land.

Productive/Selfcare

Did my weekly bujo layout (just until I get my hobonichi lol)

Applied to college

Studied some of my SAT book stuff however it’s kind of jargon so perhaps I switch methods

Made an appointment with old college to unenroll

🎧 - In Bloom, ZEROBASEONE

I didn’t feel very proud of myself today but I did more than usual. I got some shit done and that’s what matters. My covid is going away slowly but surely and I’m really really ready to start my new job. I haven’t done a bujo layout in forever too. I got to use some of my stickers from the Hoard of them too so that was nice.

See y’all tomorrow!

(This post is related to the study technique that @macgyvermedical mentioned in this post)

Toxicology quiz preparation (part 1)

[disclaimer: i'm not a scientist yet, only a student, and these are notes for school. Don't trust me with serious informations, if you have inhaled/drank/ate/had contact with anything toxic/unsafe please contact a doctor!]

Main terms:

Toxicology - a discipline that studies toxins/poisons, it's impact on living organisms, how to avoid them and how to treat poisonings caused by them. The name stems from greek words toxicos and logos;

Toxin/poison - a substance that in small dose strongly disrupts/is harmful/lethal to living organisms;

Xenobiotic - a chemical compound that is present in the body without being produced by it or absorbed with food. Most toxins and drugs (medicine) are xenobiotics.

Main groups of Xenobiotics are:

-drugs (also called medicine/medicaments/pharmaceiticals), including: antibiotics and chemotherapeutic agents;

-pesticides (name stems from latin words: pestis and caedo);

-pollutants (including: dioxins and polichlorinated biphenyls);

-occupational exposure factors.

Propreties of toxins:

toxcisity - it directly causes disease symptoms;

mutagenicity;

whenever they're cancerogenic (are a cause of cancer);

teratogenicity - it has negative impact on the fetus;

allergenicity- it causes allergies.

something i've forgotten about trying to do school is that i legitimately can't think past a certain level when i'm exhausted. and i'm exhausted so often. (adhd. depression. chronic fatigue. fog, fog, fog)

but in real life in other parts of life i can just. go to work and go through the motions. or call in sick at least. i go months without working on my own writing projects because of this

and this has gotta be why i keep failing this damned english class. because it demands daily reading and writing and thinking

i am worried for my plans of brain-based work in the future. can i really write for a living, or do programming, or anything else beyond customer service?

anyway. i am about to write and turn in the shittiest paper

I’ve been reading Orlando by Virginia Woolf (this book has amplified my beef with her but it’s also very interesting gender-wise) lately, and also actually studying for once.

I’m utterly unprepared for Greek class tomorrow. I can’t aspirate my thetas

Me? Posting this instead of working? It’s more likely than you think

[ID: a Facebook-style affirmation image, which shows a person happily studying. They are surrounded by a bright pink gradient border, and above and below them is white text reading: I am not overwhelmed by things that should by all accounts be overwhelming. /End ID]

[ID: German textbooks spread out on a patterned quilt. Micky Mouse pyjama trousers are visible in the bottom corner /end ID]

Studying with a disability (or even without) isn’t all perfectly tidy desks.

Today I’m in bed with books everywhere

May 13, 2024 • Monday

--- Days of Productivity [3/10] ---

I went for a walk today with my rollator. It felt good, it felt free :)

Finished a rather annoying chapter in DBMS, and now that I've got that out of the way, I can focus on other subjects.

🎧 Sympathy — Narrowhaven

Grad school is making me feel very alienated, and not for whatever usual reasons…

Legit, the courses aren’t even that hard, so I hve time to do other things that I want to.

But I’m in a hybrid setting where some of us are in person, and some of us are online. I’m online.

Us students who are online are treated very differently. We’re not allowed to have our cameras on, we’re not allowed to turn on our mic unless it’s something important, the professor keeps the camera off so we’re not able to see her or the other students, we’ve complained about not being able to hear some of the students in class but they won’t do anything about it, everything we say is refuted but the in person students are always right (even when they say the same things we do). Even though in person students sometimes go online when they can’t make it in, they weren’t included in an email about “proper zoom etiquette”. When we couldn’t hear the sound to a documentary that one professor wanted the class to watch together, she literally said “oh well” before a student in class got up to fix it. She was literally going to make us watch the video with no sound. The in person students all get to go on trips together to different museums in order to see behind the scenes, paid for by the program. You know how it feels when you’re talking about something important to you and someone just says “okay” and goes to talk to someone else, or just ignores you? This is legitimately happening every day to us in class, and it’s infuriating.

It’s not like I’m online because I want to be. I’m online because I’m disabled and can’t live by myself in a state that’s 12 hours away from anyone who knows me. Hell, I can barely live alone 30 minutes away from someone who knows me. This is just another example of how I get treated less than just because I’m not able bodied. As an academic, who wants to continue being an academic, academia is so ableist and gatekeepy and bullshit.

First study session in my bedroom and it is really weird doing it in front of a mirror

At least I get cute selfies

Notes for my dinosaurs during downtime at work.

1/100 days of productivity

100 Days of Productivity (47/100)

April 14th 2024

approx two seconds from quitting my job guys it’s gonna happen. today was rough but like I was productive at work too much so bc my managers sit around and do nothing and the one who was on today made me basically close everything but kitchen by myself and that is not a one person job. I hurt so bad. but it’ll be okay. tomorrow will be a better and brighter day.

🎧 - Potential Break Up Song, Aly & AJ

Productivity/Self Care

ran errands for my mom

ate breakfast with family

took jake (the dog) to family breakfast

went to work

brought my friend an ethernet cord

went to walmart big steps gang

neways gn guys see y’all tmrw :)

hey real quick if youre a studyblr or even just a person in academia and 

🌟 are neurodivergent and/or struggle with mental or physical health problems that impede on your academic performance

🌟 are a first gen student or otherwise feel a bit lost navigating this world compared to your peers who might have a bit more uh,, nepo baby energy

🌟 really hate the corrupt and elitist parts of academia but also love your studies and your dreams too much to give up on it

🌟 genuinely want to better the world with your education not just dangle it over people as part of a god complex or use it to help gatekeep knowledge

🌟 just generally kinda feel like academia wasnt really built for you but you are determined to make it so that it is, if not for yourself then for future generations at the very least

interact with this would you? you dont even need to follow if you arent a studyblr or dont want that on your dash, i just feel chronically alone out here sometimes and i could use the reminder that i am definitely not the only person feeling like this and not the only one fighting this fight. if this post only gets one note thats good enough for me lol