See, Andrew Lloyd Webber relates to the phantom in an incel, insecure musical genius, why don’t women love me, never got over his divorce from Sarah Brightman, kind of way which is pretty cringe and explains atrocities such as Love Never Dies.

I, on the other hand, relate to the phantom in a queer autistic with a lot of trauma and internalized shame, doesn’t always view myself as fully human, longing for connection but terrified of people and lacks social skills, hiding in my own little world and obsessing over my special interests, questionable impulse and emotional control, penchant for gothic melodrama and theatrics, the real gothic horror is your childhood trauma, kind of way, which, of course, is much more cool and sexy.

We are not the same.

Disabled people are not failures, capitalism is.

When society fails disabled people, no one ever thinks to examine the failures of society, only the "defectiveness" of the disabled person. and they will label literally any difference as defective. This is the medical model of disability. It's not defined by the disabled person's pain, or the disabled person's experience, only whether you can effectively serve our current capitalist society.

This system is not objective. This system does not describe any inherent "badness" that all disabilities share. The term "disabled" does not describe any natural grouping like cephalopods and invertebrae: It describes a group of people who have been failed by society.

Disabled people, if you are struggling with your disability, please know that your disability does not justify any of it.

"but I do have x disability so obviously society isn't going to-" Nope. You have every right to be angry. You have every right to be filled with rage at the fact you are not being accommodated. You, as a disabled person, deserve to be here. You are not a failure. You have been failed.

framework

i am the very definition of self-destructive i say, with no shame it's automatic, symptomatic simply, a fact of life unfair and terrible and mine to claim

who was i meant to be if not this i don't regret anything i wouldn't change a thing wouldn't risk all i have for a different person in the making because this made me me

i am the very definition of broken but i am not wrong i view the world from another angle unexpected but sorely needed my time is limited but i'm not ready to be dismissed

i am not brave when i suffer when i merely persist as if it's even a question i am brave when i tell people where to go when i tell people no

Hearing a teacher describe how you’re feeling, belittling it, then when you defend the feeling of indescribable rage that’s boiling in your skin, she tells you that it’s “not school appropriate”.

Yeah, well, she caused this. All of the teachers trying to pick apart my disability, trying to fix me, trying to take my walker away. That’s why I’m angry.

Me, resisting the urge to murder ableists: ^^^

ID: a graphic of a small yellow emoji, lips pressed together, eyes staring at nothing, hands pressed together in front of it’s face.

People that use the "R" slur for fun are uncreative and outdated. Congratulations you sound like a badly written bully from 2005. Please try new words. We have many wonderful, non slur options.

[Black text on a white background that reads:

my gender is whatever makes me easiest to kill,

my gender is breeding stock, kill all men, can’t you just stay unobtrusive and neutral, the question cut apart in debate chambers, my ragged flesh and bones picked for statistics and arguments by vultures in suits who go home to too-young wives, breathing out my same old screams to useless onlookers sitting in rows, you’re disgusted by my blood on the floor but unwilling to shoot down what’s killing me slowly, what are the magic words i need to say to get you to care that i’m dying, 

my gender is polite young woman in a pantsuit long long dead, forward-thinking and modern, isn’t it funny that she lived as a man, she wanted better opportunities, we dug up the body and passed it around the archives and if you look here you’ll see the place where they cut out the most important parts, so sad to see such irreversible damage, so sad she never had children, so sad she was mutilated, but she was such a trailblazer, the first woman to put a bullet in a state senator’s head,

my gender is a bullet in a state senator’s head, shooting down vultures before they break my sibling’s skin, crippled tranny faggot (triple threat) with a score to settle, with a gash down the center of its chest spitting fire through pharmacy phone lines, never fucked someone who wasn’t an enemy of the state, never was your little girl, sticking around till the bitter end and triple dog dare you to come bash me yourself you bloody-beaked coward, come watch me be the monster you all say i am,

my gender is whatever makes me hardest to kill.]

Do you have any examples of shows that handle speech impediment representation well? As someone with a speech impediment, it’s frustrating to constantly see it used only in the contexts of “This person is socially awkward” or “This person has something wrong with them,” etc.

Nothing comes to mind — you're right that there's tons of examples, and most suck. Like, I'll give partial credit to Umbrella Academy for Diego's stutter, Septimus Heap for Sep's selective mutism, and It for Bill's stutter/lisp. They all get the usefulness of speech path, and the way that stress or tiredness can mess you up. But all three also have "I can't be successful unless I talk normatively" crap, and both It and Umbrella Academy briefly have the stutter be the butt of a joke.

Does anyone else have examples that are actually good? Please help.

this misinfo around tourettes and tic disorders is something i've dealt with for YEARS.

i've had people with autism who've self diagnosed (please NEVER NEVER EVER self-dx tics) their stims as tics and once they've learnt the difference, they never speak of it again.

which is fine and it happens but.

tics aren't just some random attribute that you can attribute to yourself because you watched a tiktok or googled some tourettes websites.

thats not how neurological disorders work. tics are a symptom and could be KILLING you, if it NOT a tic disorder or tourettes. tics and tourettes are NEVER caused by autism or adhd, or ocd.

you're fundamentally misunderstanding a disorder that affects my EVERY DAY LIFE and using that label as your own when you don't need it.

if you're ticcing- see a neurologist and don't pretend you now anything about tics, tic disorders, or tourettes until you do. because otherwise you're actively harming the rest of us with your misinformation.

You just gotta love when allistic people invalidate your extremely expensive and comprehensive diagnosis because you don’t conform to their preconceived stereotypes. Like, I’m sorry I don’t act like your 5 year old autistic nephew, Karen, I’ve been masking my autism by force for over 20 years. I did, in fact, act exactly like that when I WAS 5 years old, but nobody fucking diagnosed me back then because I was female and in the wrong place at the wrong time. The enduring trauma is painful and extremely debilitating, thank you very much.

Do feel free to fuck thoroughly in the direction of off!

A Fruitless Wish

Would you scream with me Drive through the night The flickering fear of my wish growing with the shadow of every streetlight we pass along the way Where are we going...is it any better than where we've been?

Would you scream first When the sound sticks in my throat So desperate to open up that I shutdown at the magnitude of everything so long held in I can't, I can't, I can't - my usual refrain echoing endlessly inside my head A habit hard to break (don't let go, play nice, stay quiet) I can't. My voice breaks instead (I break a touch more with each second I deny myself)

Would you scream louder and longer Holding steady, an unwavering faith that I will join you (holding me steady without a touch) Your voice a rampage of emotion...what does it say? Is it my rage reflected and given over so much more easily by you? Is it a rallying cry? Telling me over and over: let go, just let go Or is it another thing entirely? A love song too raw for words

Would you scream with me, just because I asked No persuasion required, no second guessing My request a call to action taken up immediately Your pleasure evident at any way to help, however strange or brief

We can't scream forever, if I can scream at all But that journey would be taken together A string of moments that might make a little more sense of the world If only to us, if only for my heart feeling a little less broken, despite the rest of myself

Update: My school took away my mobility device.

“The titan said Belos is evil tho! Are you stupid the show said he was evil!”“Masha said lil’ bro just got jelly that his brother got a girlfriend! He doesn’t have depth and his ending was supposed to be unsatisfying!”“But James Ironwood losing his arm is supposed to represent him losing his humanity”“Jason Rose said that James could’ve always become evil and sided with Salem”“They literally called him genocide general!”“But in this Q&A they said the puppies survived they just lost their laser powers! And in the tie-in material, they showed everyone was fine! You just hate Starco!”“The show/tie-in material/a fucking Q&A said blah blah blah!”These arguments are shit. TOH- “God says witches are evil so it is his duty to kill them!” is a pretty horrible justification for killing someone except when the titan says it to Luz. I don’t think Luz is in the wrong for killing Belos, he was a genocidal maniac and child abuser and genuinely irredeemable- nobody who hates the ending of The Owl House complains about Belos being irredeemable, they complain about the show flopping the cult critical message, how hunter’s possession felt like needless shock value, the show not properly setting up the collector or how the coven system/conformitorium’s writing is a mess or how Eda becoming a teacher makes as much sense as Toph becoming a cop and you can go ‘but the show said-’ what the show said had unfortunate implications, was uncomfortable to abuse survivors, and I can’t forgive the ass-pullery of the trailer-bait nightmare sequence or how in the hexside crew became irrelevant! When people complain about how Belos was handled nobody complains about him not getting a redemption arc- they complain that hunter should’ve been there to see belos die or how they hate Luz’s power up. RWBY -James Ironwood’s and Penny’s character arcs and deaths felt so ableist it’s actually uncomfortable to watch, I have ASD my sister, and like half of the people I know have PTSD, I don’t know any amputees but I’ve seen plenty making noise about how shit the writing was. Good, they should be mad! The show’s message about prosthetics/amputations was toxic! Not mention for all the hopeful messages Team RWBY screams at the top of their lungs about trust they knowingly broke Ironwood’s trust for very poorly defined reasons! while I do think ruthless pragmatism is a bad thing, team RWBY offered no alternatives, he wasn’t a villain- he was facing an ethical dilemma and got fucked over. And SVTFOE- I shouldn’t have to buy tie-in materials to understand the show- tie-in material should be a bonus not a supplement or requirement, I Don’t have to buy the ATLA comics inorder to understand the show, I don’t have to read all of Lord Of The Rings to understand the movies. It doesn’t matter how the show was supposed to be interpreted or how the audience is supposed to feel, and It’s perfectly valid for the audience not to care about damage control spinoffs (cough cough Steven Universe) or Q&A’s or whatever. I’ll admit sometimes the audience is fucking stupid and completely media illiterate but can we stop acting like anyone who doesn’t blindly consume product and go with what the writers said are stupid? I know im not articulating this well but I’m pissy rn and I’m having trouble deconstructing whats wrong with those kind of arguments but god there is so much wrong with these arguements

Summary: Just a short little thing I wanted to write since my back is hurting again (which naturally means Roach's back is hurting again). This is technically a mini-sequel to Replacement, which I wrote a long while ago, but you don't have to read that to understand this! Enjoy!

"This is it," Roach groaned, feeling pain shoot up his spine as he shifted, "I'm done for. I love you both, split my items amicably. Make sure the worlds best son mug goes to Eddie, just to see Johnathan pout about it."

There was a small laugh from next to him, "You're not dying bug."

"Besides," Ghost chimed in from the other half of the room, "you wouldn't be dead for long, I'll drag your ass up from hell. No getting rid of me that easy." He didn't look up from his stack of paperwork.

"You would force me back i to a world of suffering and pain?!"

"You're being dramatic," Soap chimed. He took Roach's hand in his own, rubbing circles onto his skin with his thumb. "You've just thrown your back out again. Dr. Sanchez said you'll be fine in a day or two."

"My own boyfriend, doubting the depth of my suffering." Roach threw his head to the side dramatically, only to groan again as the movement jostled his back.

The heating pack he had on was helping a bit, but it couldn't erase all of the pain he was feeling. Not even the Tylenol could really help with that. It was just something his body would have to deal with and fix on its own. Just as it had caused the problem on its own.

On the bright side of things, Roach had the privilege of being doted on by his darling boyfriends for a few days. The two hadn't been willing to leave his side after his rather dramatic moment of his back trying to kill itself.

He'd just bent down to pick up his dropped keys, then the moment he'd started to rise back up and there had been a shooting burning pain down his spine. The pain continued on, flooding down through his legs until it felt like it was at the tips of his toes. His knees had given out then, and before he'd even had time to realize that for himself, both Soap and Ghost were at his side checking on him.

"Why do I have to have these issues?" Roach gave a whine, finally done with his dramatics. At least for the moment. "I'm not that old yet!"

Soap gave another laugh and moved into Roach's side, cuddling up to him with his head on his chest. "You know thats not why your back does this."

Roach gave a huff, "You get hit by a car one time and now you've got to deal with lifelong back problems." He shook his head, "Sick and fucking twisted."

Soap gave a small hum and Roach knew the man was likely agreeing with him. After all, Roach knew that Soap had his own issues and recurring pain with his shoulder. He remembered well enough the panic he'd felt when Soap had taken a bullet to the shoulder. Then the panic that came after that when months after healing Soap had a few days where even lifting the limb slightly would cause him pain.

Ghost didn't say anything, but Roach figured the man dealt with much of the same issues as them. He was certainly better at hiding it, but Roach always noticed when he was favoring one leg over the other or would give a wince under that mask because he'd stepped a bit wrong.

It was part of the job. Roach knew that, and he knew that they were all lucky to have only those slight problems, rather than lost limbs like Alex and Jackson, or worse like the many men he'd seen fall in battle before him.

He gave a final sigh, deciding that it would be more beneficial to just enjoy the warmth of his boyfriend next to him rather than complaining further. He needed to take the opportunity to relax anyway. And what an opportunity this was.

Bonus:

"So are you guys gonna blow my back out like you did the last time I was bedridden or what?"

templates by Halkounn

c. bhaal / sword - colour / plant / creature / scent / song / spell

i saw some other people do these and thought they were cute! so i wanted to do one as well <3

plant - Lily

creature - cryptic black cat

scent - jasmine green tea (and blood hehe)

song - as good as reason (Paris Paloma)

spell - immolating gaze