#daredevil fandom
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Devilish Worries and Bodies
Pairing: Matt Murdock x F (afab) reader
Word count: 3.3K
Warning/note: 18 + MDNI, mentions of anxiety/mental health/worries, and smutty smut smut! P in V intercourse. Some fluff. No description physical description of reader other than afab. Not proofread! Please validate me and this self-indulgent fic, sad girl era is thriving.
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Matt had already come home after a long day of fighting for justice through the legal, sophisticated, respectable way of the courts as the good samaritan lawyer for the voiceless and defenceless of Hell’s Kitchen. And then endured a long night of fighting for justice through the illegal, frowned-upon way of his vigilante persona, Daredevil. He’d come home, you’d helped him clean up the couple of cuts he had and he’d gone to bed now. He was sleeping peacefully, he looked like an angel as his eyes were closed and no worries were etched into his face.
He had been in a deep slumber by the time you left the bed, he was yet to notice. You hadn’t been able to sleep at all, and it wasn’t his fault that that was the case. You were now sitting on the sofa in the living room that felt even greyer and colder than usual. Everything felt so cold, you almost wondered if your vision was acting up. You just needed some rain outside and you’d be in Catherine Hardwicke’s blue-green-tinted world of Twilight.
You had a glass of water in your hands that was now room-temperature because you’d been sitting there so long. Holding it. Thinking. Thinking about just tipping the glass of water out onto yourself, because why not? Then that image would replay over and over. Then you’d sip from it. Somehow. Lower it. Back to holding and then back to thinking. It was still pretty full at this stage.
Staring out the window into the numerous lights that appeared to float mid-air, parallel to the sky at different points. You couldn’t see any stars, you hated that. At least if there were stars you’d have some luck of counting them, maybe trying to name some of them, in an attempt of some distraction technique you told yourself that a normal person could do. Then you thought a normal person probably wouldn’t even to do this. The voice in your head that said it, was mean, it was the kind of a high school bully which made you feel even worse. You let out a deep sigh and choke on a little sob that you didn’t know had been wanting to come out.
That’s the noise that wakes Matt up, he stretches out in the bed you share as he lets out a quiet but deep yawn as he tiredly rubs his eye. He moves a hand through his sleep-toussled hair as he immediately realises that you’re not in bed with him. He sighs as he focuses on the elevated heartbeat of yours he can hear drumming along further in the apartment. He immediately knows something is up, when he’d originally come home he thought something might’ve been bothering you as you seemed slightly detached but he’d been able to write it off as you just being tired because it was extremely late when he’d come home after a patrol. He couldn’t write this off as early hours fatigue though. He knew you, down to the core, even when you didn’t want to be perceived.
Matt gets up and slowly walks out of the bedroom with gentle footsteps, he could’ve been a ballerina in another lifetime. He’s so quiet with his movement after years of practice that you don’t notice he’s out of bed until he’s standing just a few steps away from the couch.
It’s when you get the feeling of goosebumps on the back of your neck and that feeling that somebody is watching you that you start to wonder. You’re not sure though if it’s just depressed paranoia that makes you feel like somebody is watching, Matt had absolutely passed out, he should be in a deep sleep still you think. But you try to slow your breathing and not given into the urge to look and further panic, but you think that if someone was behind you it’s better to look and know that there is or that you’re not just feeling depressed but also paranoid.
With a sigh after a sharp inhale you slowly turn your head and look, you see Matt standing there. He’s just a couple of steps away from you, he’s facing you and well… he’s not just facing you, he’s analysing you. You look at him with tears in your eyes as you know he’s doing a full scan of your senses.
Matt steps closer immediately and sits on the sofa right next to you as the first tear has just dropped. You’re not sure if it’s because he can hear the tear dropping out of your tear duct to run down your cheek, or if it’s because he can smell the extra stress hormones or something in these emotional tears.
“I thought you were asleep.” You whisper hoarsely, almost feeling ashamed at this scene happening.
“I was.” He says gently as he raises his hand to your cheek and then he gently rubs your cheek, wiping up the few tears had already shed.
“I didn’t mean to wake you. I’m sorry-” Now it’s guilt as well.
“Don’t apologise.” He quickly cuts you off in a gentle tone.
He’s caring but he says it so nonchalantly, like this is normal. He’d spent a day working with clients, then he’d had a violent patrol and now you having a mini-breakdown interrupted his sleep. You felt bad and you knew that maybe you shouldn’t because you’re a human and you’re entitled to a cry and love and understanding. And all those things. But brains aren’t logical, and they sure as hell aren’t when you’re going through the emotions.
You sigh as you look at his face, seeing the compassion and adoration.
“Are you going to talk to me, beautiful?” He whispers with a gentle, playful smile. He’s trying to ease this. Diffuse the anxiety.
“It’s just overwhelming. There’s a lot of mental noise and I’m struggling to not spiral-because well I’m already spiralling and nothing feels good. I’m not good. I’m just not good.” You spit out.
He quickly pulls you into his arms and your face is pressed against his warm bare chest. You can’t help but let out a soft sigh of relief and bury your head further into his chest. It’s so comforting and even when you’re a mess, he still somehow knows how to comfort you.
“Maybe you’re not good, and you’re just great instead.” He whispers as he starts to caress your back gently, he seems to be almost tracing an invisible pattern as he does. “That’s how I feel about you. Other days you may be good. It’s been bad before, it’s been good before. It can feel good again, honey. And it will.”
You sigh and tilt your head to look at him as you move more into his lap and adjust yourself to be more physically comfortable. You trust him, you love him, you believe him but you’re not sure if you believe him more than the disbelief you have in yourself.
Matt seems to sense this hesitation in you. “Five things you see?” He asks softly as his head is tilted to face you, he’s focusing on you because you’re his whole world.
“Um…” You inhale and start to look around as you think. “Your face…” You say and almost chuckle, he smiles that charming grin widely and chuckles. “Good, what else.”
You look around and think. “The window… The couch… that plant in the ugly pot my cousin gave us.” You say and you both smile at that. You had to describe in detail the absolute atrocity of the pot to Matt when had been gifted to you both and it was now a bit in your relationship.
“Good, good, not so good.” He chuckles with the smile that’s slowly distracting you from your worries. “One more thing.”
“Um, the light.” You say quietly.
“Four things you can feel.” He says and you can’t help but chuckle.
“Well, you, I guess, and four different parts of you.” You say as you look at him as your cheeks heat up.
“Sure, I’ll give you that one.” He says playfully. “Do I feel good?” He then asks teasingly. It makes you roll your eyes and chuckle.
“Yeah.”
“So something feels good.” He says with a proud smirk.
“Don’t use my words back at me, like that.” You say as you watch him smile.
“Mm, don’t say them then, pretty thing.” He says proudly and he chuckles and kisses your lips softly with a little peck. “Now should I keep going with the grounding and distraction technique?”
“I don’t know-”
“Why, are you in your body and out of your head enough?” He asks with a smirk as he caresses your back.
“Maybe. You’re pretty good at that.” You say, he is. He’s so good at reassuring you and bringing you back to Planet Earth and away from the galaxy of overthinking and mental black holes.
You lean against him and press a soft gentle kiss to his collarbone as he’s so close to you. All of him is, he’s enveloping you. He lets out a quiet little groan at that, that he tries to muffle but you catch it. You look up at him and bite your lip.
You move slightly and caress his strong arms gently.
“Honey, are you sure? You’re… Well you’ve been upset…” He says softly. He means it.
“Yeah, but I’m feeling better now. And maybe the dopamine and oxytocin is just what I need.” You say matter of factly but still a little anxiously.
“Oh really?” He cocks his head slightly and there’s a devilish grin on his face but his eyes are filled with love and adoration.
“Yes really.” You smiled softly as you looked up at him, you really loved him and you felt safe with him. Matt started to run his thumb along your jaw and down your throat gently.
You felt your cheeks heat up more and then you trailed your hand down his chest, his stomach, being careful to avoid any visible cuts or bruises on his pale skin. Your hand made it’s way down to palm him over his boxers. You watched his face carefully, his cheeks started to tinge with a blush and he smiled.
“Mm, no.” He said with a smirk and then he quickly flipped you carefully and gently so you were now lying on your back on the couch while his hand was firmly on your waist as he looked down. You sharply gasped as this happened but then let out a giggle which just made his smirk grow ten times more.
Matt lowered himself, caressing your waist gently and then running his hand down to your thigh and up again slowly, your breath started to slow in anticipation as you bit your lip, he was paying attention to your breathing and then he tugged your sleep bottoms down.
Your cheeks heated up more at that as you looked down at him. He was completely focused on you now as his fingers danced around your inner thigh, spelling out invisible love letters and filth on your sensitive skin as you gasped at each touch. For a man with a moniker that had the word ‘devil’ in it, he sure was heaven of a man.
Matt started to kiss your thighs, as his fingers moved up, he then paused his kisses as he finally travelled across to your vulva and ran a single finger through your folds. It triggered an automatic soft moan that made him smirk for a moment as he then gently spread your folds.
His finger starts to travel more, he teases your hole with his index finger, circling it and almost going in for you to swallow him up but never quite, you feel your core clench up at this and don’t even realise that you’re holding your breath, waiting for him. Waiting for more. He keeps exploring, teasing, and pulling out soft moans and groans of anticipation from you, he starts to slowly insert his finger which makes you gasp and then he pulls it out. He brings the finger to his mouth and sucks on it, tasting your juices.
You gasp at this and watch him, you’d been watching him the whole time but now your eyes are absolutely glued to him. He then brings his finger mixed with your juices and his saliva to that sweet, sweet, bundle of nerves that’s craving his touch. He starts to circle it slowly in a clockwise motion, applying a little more pressure.
“You know, that tasted pretty good.” He says. He says it so confidently, the nature of his tones words, and what’s happening makes your cheeks heat up more as you let out some soft moans. “I should probably try it straight from the source, that’s what I need to do, isn’t it?”
“Oh Matt…” You can’t help but feel like you’re going to explode just from his words. But he’s already dived in.
Matt kisses along your vulva as he inserts his finger into your hole, lightly, almost teasingly. The kisses get closer and then he starts to lick. You’re almost squirming a little now, it feels so good, he’s not even at your clitoris yet, but his mouth and fingers is the start of an overwhelming heaven and you know that. You let out a loud whine and as you squirm, he moves his free hand to firmly hold your thigh, keeping you in place and he groans against you. The vibration of that is absolutely perfectly and you bite your lip, trying not to cry out, as you feel your eyes close as he licks your folds while pumping the tips of his index and now middle finger out.
After a loud whine he smirks and then moves his mouth to the sweet spot as he keeps lightly fingering you, he licks your bundles of nerves, slowly, almost painfully so, circling it with his tongue and then you feel him kissing it and then he starts to lightly suck on your clitoris. You whine out at that, desperately so, as you claw the side of the couch and your eyes start to roll back. He hums against your clitoris, he’s so perfect and he knows that you love that so much. It always feels so damn good and it does right now. The vibration of that humming perfectly gets you off every time and sends pleasure right from your core right down to your feet and up to your head.
Matt keeps humming, well aware of what it does to you, and hungrily sucks on your clitoris, like his life depends on bringing you to orgasm, that he is a man dying of a thirst that only tour sweet juices can quench, that your release will be his salvation. He keeps sucking and you feel your eyes roll back so much and you’re moaning so loudly as your back arches, he’s taking you to the peak and you can’t hold it back anymore. You whine out and grip the sofa more as he firmly holds your thigh, his fingers digging in as his mouth brings you to an overwhelming and incredible orgasm.
“Oh Matt!” You whine out as the pleasure from it floods you. He keeps sucking and licking, making sure he gets each last drop and makes the most of your taste that he’s obsessed with and needs. He slows down after your release as you pant quickly you can’t help but smile and as you look down and see his face move away, his chin and mouth is wet but his lips are curled up in a smile.
“You taste sweeter than anything I could ever dream of wanting.” He says as he caresses your thigh, there’s a slight flush in his face as he pants a little. Your cheeks heat up more at his words and as you watch him move.
Matt takes his boxers off and then quickly kneels on the couch, spreading your legs and you see his thick member aroused and hungry. He’s looking at you as moves closer, holding it and then you move your hand down, feeling it and the precum that’s already dripping. You help him line himself up.
Matt immediately thrusts in, he bottoms out quickly, you sharply inhale and he lets out a loud, perfect groan that’s music to your ears.
“Absolutely perfect every time.” He whispers and then he slowly starts to move as his hand moves up your stomach and to your chest as he holds onto a breast while his other hand is planted onto the sofa to steady himself as he moves.
You feel yourself clenching more around him with each thrust, his rhythm is steady but quick and you’re already so sensitive after the mindblowing orgasm he just gave you. Matt groans as his pace increases while he thrusts into you. You can’t help but whine out as he squeezes your breast and grunts out while moving.
Matt then moves so his body is flushed against you, chest to chest, he puts his arm under your head, almost cuddling you closer to him as his hips start to move ten times faster.
“Oh Matt, fuck…oh god…” You whine out loudly as he moves quickly and you’re so physically overwhelmed. He smiles at your reaction and groans into your ear, pressing his lips right against you to kiss your hair and moan into it as he fucks you like his life depends on it.
His hips are moving so quickly and it completely contrasts to how the way he’s holding you is almost so gentle. You wrap your arms around his back, almost weakly and then start to scratch his toned back as the thrusts become deeper and deeper. You feel so full.
“So perfect, so beautiful. I love you.” He groans into his ear as he keeps pounding into you. He’s a man in love and one that craves your body. He’s absolutely obsessed. “Your pussy is always so needy. I love it.” He groans into your ear as the thrusts become faster.
“I love… I love you… t-too…” You whimper out as he keeps thrusting. You bury your head into the crook of his neck as he keeps going, he’s squeezing you tighter. “I love you s-so-so much…” You feel his hips starting to sputter as the rhythm breaks up a little. He’s still thrusting quickly into you but he’s getting close.
“You feel so good, I’m not gonna last long beautiful.” He moans into your ear as he holds you tighter and keeps thrusting into you. You nod against his shoulder and neck, you knew this, and you have no issue with it.
You dig your nails into his back and scratch him, goosebumps run along his skin at your touch and his breath changes for a moment as his body trembles slightly and he gives one last thrust as he then releases. He groans out and you look up at him smiling and biting your lip, he always looked so handsome when he finished and he made the sweetest noises.
He groans and opens his eyes slowly, he looks at you and then immediately kisses you on the lips lovingly and comfortingly. He pants against your soft lips as he rests them there after the kiss. You run your fingers through his dark hair that now has beads of sweat from this exertion. This is peaceful, he loves you and you love him. You’re perceived, and somehow, that’s okay with Matt.
After a moment he kisses you again and then he carries you to bed, he’s your loving, protective big spoon as your mind finally quietens down and you get to enjoy a deep sleep next to your handsome devil.
#matt murdock#matt murdock fic#matt murdock smut#daredevil#netflix daredevil#daredevil smut#matt murdock imagine#matt murdock fanfic#matt murdock x f reader#matt murdock x reader#matt murdock x you#daredevil x reader#daredevil fanfiction#daredevil fanfic#charlie cox daredevil#charlie cox#charlie cox fanfiction#charlie cox characters#charlie cox fandom#daredevil fandom#marvel daredevil#matt murdock fluff#daredevil fluff#chaithetics
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the thing is that I have read too much fanfictions about Matt fucking Murdock where he could smell how wet you are?! how am I supposed to live love laugh with this information??
#matthew#matt murdock fluff#matt murdock imagine#matt murdock fanfic#matt murdock fanart#matt murdock#matt murdock x reader#matt murdock x you#daredevil fluff#daredevil imagine#daredevil fanfiction#daredevil fandom#daredevil fanart#daredevil
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THE DINNER - M.MURDOCK
Pairing: Best Friend! Matt x Fem!Reader
Word Count: 840
Summary: after teasing you all night at a valentine's day dinner, matt requests some alone time with you, his best friend, to "talk".
Warnings: fingering, dry humping, daddy kink, size kink, swearing, petnames, praise kink, slight degradation kink, matt being a tease, alcohol mentioned, huge possession kink, choking, slight hint of breeding kink
notes: i whipped this up as a gift last night, because i love you all soooo much! happy valentines day lovies<3 mwah
“I don’t know about this Matty.” you giggled, beaming from ear to ear as his arms caged you in against the wall, locking your tipsy gaze on his soft lips as they moved.
“You don’t have to know silly girl. Don't you trust me?” he cooed, to which you nodded. Your heart hammered a steady rhythm against your ribs, and you need he could note its increasing tempo the closer his skin was against yours, the lower his voice got, huskness lacing his words like sweet venom
“Course I trust you! But what if they notice we’re gone?”
“They know we’re gone. I told them we had to talk.” he shrugged, a cheeky grin on his face as his other hand slipped down, locking the bathroom door beside the pair of you against the cool tile wall.
The night had started a few hours ago, a nice, candlelit dinner followed up with little rose vases and champagne during the Valentine's dinner you were at with so many other friends. They had hardly noticed the way his hand slipping under the white, crisp tablecloth in the dimly lit dining room, stroking up and down your thigh. Had hardly noticed how flustered you became whenever he had purred out your name, speaking on your behalf.
Oh Y/N will have this. She loves that. Isn't that right bun? It drove you insane. So of course, when he had escorted you from the table, they thought nothing of it- two friends talking. Taking a walk.
But here you were, panties in a twist as you peered up at him, chest rapidly rising and falling as you felt your reasoning falter. “Talk about what Matty?”
“Talk about the fact I could feel Frank's eyes on you the whole night when you're mine.” The possession was evident in his voice as he growled, causing your core to throb, thighs shifting together as an attempt to hide the fact you were dripping.
No use. He knew it, he could sniff you out like a hound on the prowl, his fists clenching in agony at the fact he couldn't breed you like a bitch in heat at this very second.
“B-but we aren't dating silly!” you chirped out, champagne causing you to hiccup as your hands slipped up to trail up his abs, playing with this stark black tie you loved so much.
“Mhmm I know. Just friends, yea?”
“The bestest of friends.” you smiled, eyes widening as his smirk widened, hand sliding up to cup around your throat comfortably, the other lifting up your hips up so your legs wrapped around his waist.
It was now you realized how much bigger he was then you, all large and beefy.
You wanted to bite him. That's the champagne. Champagne does silly things. But he looked so yummy in that suit…
“The bestest of friends hmm? The kind of friends who do this?” he murmured, squeezing just a bit tighter around your airways, a moan ripping through your vocal cords.
“Yea atta girl. You know how much I love those pretty noises you make angel. So eager for daddy hm?” You began to rut your hips against him at his words, savoring the way his words felt whispered against your ear, caressing your skin.
“M’so needy for you Daddy.” you whined gently, scared of being heard over the soft ambient piano music that streamed under the door from the main room. But you knew Matt wouldn't care. If anything, he’d want the entire block to know it was him making you feel this way, it was him who had you folding in seconds whenever you were together for too long.
“I know sweet girl, I could feel you pulsing all night. You've been so good, waiting. You know that?” he coaxed, hand slipping from your throat to tug at the crimson red fabric that was draped over your curves, dress now rumbled from your movements.
“Y-you were teasing me.”
“Was I? I didn’t notice.” he teased, slipping past your panties. “You take what you need from Daddy sweetheart. I know it's been so, so hard for you hm?”
You melted under his touch, turning into sand that slipped through his fingers as he cupped your mound, palm bumping your clit as you bucked.
“Need inside Daddy. Please!” you begged, clenching onto his suit for dear life as he clucked his tongue. Your lips parted as you clenched around his digit, now covered in your juices as he pumped his finger.
"S’tight angel. Just a lil thing, only able to take a few fingers yea?” he mocked, licking his lower lip at the sounds of the slick, your little pants and moans as you craved more than you could manage.
“S’okay baby, you've done it before, you can do it again. Make me so proud.”
“Please..” you breathed, shoulder straps slipping down your shoulders, breasts jiggling with each roll of your hips.
“Do whatever you need angel, because after we need to talk. And by talk, I mean have it my way.”
#matt murdock#matt murdock x you#matthew murdock x reader#matt murdock fanfic#matt murdock fanart#matt murdock smut#matt murdock x reader#matt murdock fanfiction#matt murdock fluff#matt murdock fem!reader#daredevil fic#daredevil x y/n#daredevil x oc#daredevil fanfiction#daredevil smut#daredevil#daredevil x reader#daredevil x you#daredevil fluff#daredevil fandom#charlie cox#netflix daredevil
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My Harry Potter fans. Did it ever occur to you to fancast Charlie Cox, aka Matt Murdock, aka Daredevil as Remus lupin
HAS THAT OCCURED TO ANYONE?!?!?!
LOOK AT THIS BIG BALL OF SUNSHINE AND TELL ME HE WOULDN'T BE A GOOD FANCAST FOR REMUS J. LUPIN!!!!!!!!!
#harry potter#hp#random idea#harry potter fandom#hp fandom#harry potter world#harry potter fancast#harry potter imagine#harry potter ideas#hp imagine#hp fancast#hp headcanon#remus lupin fancast#remus lupin#remus loves chocolate#marauders fandom#hp marauders#the marauders era#the marauders#marauders#marauders era#the marauders fandom#the marauders fancast#j.k. rowling#daredevil#matt murdock#daredevil fandom
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Bless Me, Father
Priest! Matt Murdock x afab! reader
Tags/Warnings: 18+, violence, smut, mention of religion, hurt/comfort
Summary: Seeking a priest for guidance. You just weren't expecting this priest to be an ex, and a vigilante.
Word Count: 4.2K
Navigation | Masterlist
A/N: This was written for a really dear friend of mine. I love them a lot, and I hope they love this story just as much! Pair this fic with A Question of Lust by Depeche Mode and Church by Chase Atlantic.
You walk into the church slowly as you think about what you would say. The cold bitter air pricks your nose, immediately warming as you step into the sanctuary. It’s been a long time since you have been here, though you feel comforted by the environment. Setting your bag and scarf on a pew, you walk towards the confessional booth and step inside quietly. You inhale and exhale before speaking to the priest on the other side.
“Bless me, father, for I have sinned.” You start. Hearing him shift in the booth next to you, you continue on. “It has been 3 months, and 15 days since my last confession.”
You continue to tell him about things you have done in the past few months. About things you feel are wrong, and how it makes you feel. How you felt shunned by your family for expressing your personal thoughts and interests. You begin to tear up as you finish speaking.
He sits for a moment before speaking. The air felt tight around you as you anticipated his voice.
“My child, there is no reason to weep.” His voice was soothing, much like a cup of hot chocolate. He continues. “What you are feeling about yourself is not wrong. You are on a journey of self discovery. Embrace it, and those who shun you will see the butterfly they mistook for a caterpillar. There is no penance for you today.”
You glance over at him, and catch a glimpse at the young priest. He looked stiff, as if he were a mannequin. You nod at his words and wipe the tears from your eyes. Stating the absolution, you thank him and step out of the booth.
Lingering for a moment, you took in sight of the beautiful cathedral. Nothing felt more peaceful than the quietness of the church. A few nuns were staggered in the pews or kneeling at the altar. The smell of sweet incense flowed through the air.
Turning to look over your shoulder, you see the priest step out of the booth and turn his head in your direction. He smiles and makes his way towards you to walk you out.
“I haven’t seen you here in a long time, y/n” He starts, you can tell he was shifting uncomfortably.
“Yeah, it has been a while huh?” You avert your gaze to the wood flooring. “Not since our breakup”
He winces at that comment. You didn’t have mal intent behind it. Just stating the fact. It had been a nasty one at that. He wanted to become a priest, and you wanted to have a family. Simple as that.
“Listen if you ever need to talk…” He sighs. “You know where you can find me.”
“Sure, sure. For godly insight I suppose?” You mutter. “Since when did Father Lantom step down?”
“About a month ago. I was appointed here personally.” Seeing the grip he held on his cane, you decided to take your leave. Not wanting to further the conversation before it got too awkward.
“I, uhm, have to head to work. Those court documents are not gonna write themselves, I guess.”
“Right. Well. Hopefully I will see you back again soon..” He said, giving a curt nod before you turn to leave. “And, God be with you, y/n”
“God be with you too, Father Murdock.”
“He WHAT?!” Karen whispered in your shared office. She really was your closest friend so obviously you had to tell her.
“Right! So he was my ex from college which was so long ago, but god we were so in love.” You crossed your arms in defeat. “How could he look even better now?!”
“Oh no! You cannot go running back to that ‘used to be good’ feeling.” She stood and crossed to you. “Did you forget that, HE’S A FUCKING PRIEST.”
“I KNOW!” You huff. You were perfectly content without the knowledge of Matt actually achieving his dream. Sure it was extremely selfish of you to think, but he did break your heart. No wonder you hadn’t heard anyone talk about him, he basically fell off the face of the earth. Lost in thought, you hardly noticed when your boss approached your office.
“What’s up guys? What’s the hot gossip?”
You look up to see your boss, Foggy, leaning against the doorframe. Hardly a boss though, he liked to consider himself a friend to everyone in the office.
“y/n wants to fuck a priest!” Karen casually said. You gasped loudly at her sudden statement, and stood up from your chair.
“I never said that!”
“Woah, didn’t see that one coming.” Foggy chuckled at the response. “Why a priest though?”
You roll your eyes as you lean against your desk. “It was a really long time ago okay? And he definitely wasn’t a priest then.”
Foggy cocks an eyebrow and looks at Karen. Who in return gives him a look.
“So what was he then?” Karen asks, looking back at you. You considered the question for a moment before sitting back down.
“Just a good catholic boy, I guess.”
“You guess?” Foggy says suddenly.
“I mean, sure we had some fun.” You start quietly. “But we always found our way back to church on Sundays…”
“I thought you weren’t religious?” Karen asked curiously. You considered the question before answering.
“I’m not anymore. Not after how everyone made me feel after our breakup.” You turn back towards your desk to end the conversation. Foggy and Karen both shrugged at each other before going back to their own tasks.
Letting the tears fall silently from your eyes, you didn’t like when people watched you cry. Not that you liked to be emotional, but you didn’t want anyone to see you as weak.
The work day was long and strenuous. You worked quietly at your desk, only looking up to answer questions or find more paperwork.
Clients called and you helped to the best of your ability to answer questions, sending them to Foggy if you couldn’t. Until it was way past your time to head. You hadn’t realized it was dark outside. Turning around, you noticed Karen was also still working.
You gather your belongings and stand to leave. Giving Karen a quick hug, before heading out.
You walked quickly down the street after getting off the bus. Not that you were trying to act in fear, but you definitely knew that someone was following you down the street.
Hell's Kitchen was never the safest at night anyways. Working late was the worst, especially in cases that involved some sort of underground organization.
Turning down another block, you turn your head to see if the man is still following you. Of course he fucking was. What is the deal with men these days? Maybe you were overthinking it, and he just lived on the same street as you. Clearly you were too lost in your anxiety to not notice the second man coming from in front of you.
“Hey, pretty thing. Where are you rushing off too?” He says before grabbing your wrist. You gasp suddenly, trying to rip your hand from his grip.
“Please let go, I’m just trying to go home!”
“Oh honey… Our boss would like to have a word with you.”
Without missing a beat, the man wraps his arm around your waist, and begins to pick you up. The kicking and punches you were throwing didn’t seem to phase him. His other hand covered your mouth to muffle your screams.
That’s when you noticed a dark figure standing on top of the building nearest you. You prayed that it would help you.
And just like that, your prayer was answered. Maybe. You watched as the figure jumped down into the alley way. Forgetting that for a moment, you continue to kick and flail your arms to deter the man.
Of course there was a parking structure for these guys' convenience. You never understood how no one caught on to these things. While putting you into the car, you feel his body slamming against the door with force. Laying on the floor you scream as you see a man clad in a full white suit tower above you.
“Wait! Wait!” He puts his hands up in surrender “I’m a good guy I promise!”
Finally getting a full look at him, you realized you had never seen this hero before. Sure you’ve run into Spiderman multiple times, and even that Dr. Strange guy.
He stretches out his hand to help you up and you hesitantly take it. You narrow your eyes at him once you’re out of the car. The accent was not from around here. British. It was definitely British. “So who are you supposed to be?” You ask.
“Oh erm. Just call me Mr. Knight.” He starts and then continues with a bow. “It’s a little late to be walking around here, innit?”
You shrug and stand there awkwardly. Reaching for your satchel you finally realize it was missing. Turning back to the car you bend and reach around for it. Once you find it, you climb back out and turn to see that this “Mr. Knight” guy was gone and replaced with a scarier version of a mummy.
He sees the surprise on your face and the fear flash in your eyes. “Same guy. Don’t call me Mr. Knight though.”
The once crisp white suit had turned into a wrapped garment with a large crescent moon in the middle of his chest. It really did look like a superhero outfit.
“Stay right here. I need to get rid of these guys.”
You nodded and watched as both goons got back to their feet in a battle stance. The man in white pulled two crescent shaped blades from his chest, and waited for one of them to throw a punch. As they began their battle, you ran further back to avoid any debris flying around.
Turning your back against the violence, you didn’t want to see what was going to happen. Your eyes shut tight as you hear the gargled screams of your kidnappers. Once you determined it was all over you glance back up and see another figure standing in the dark parking structure.
Gasping loudly you trip over your own feet before falling backwards. You scramble back up and run over to the man who just saved you. He looked confused as to what you were frightened about. That was until he saw the figure.
“If you know what’s good for you then you need to leave.” He said.
The figure in front of him growled. “I’m only here for her.”
Wait. You had seen this silhouette before. Sometimes as you walk down the street you would catch a glimpse of him. ‘The Devil of Hell's Kitchen’ they called him.
“It’s him.” You let out slowly. The man in white looked towards you, before you noticed the grip on his crescent weapons.
“Listen, guy, the lady is not interested in getting kidnapped tonight.” He said harshly. “You look like you don’t wanna die tonight either.”
“What makes you so sure you’re gonna kill me?” The figure taunted before taking a step forward. You look at this stranger with begging eyes. Hoping that you wouldn’t have to be in the middle of a hero battle. He sighed as he looked at you and then back at the devil.
“You asked for it pal.” He muttered before running towards the dark figure. Each fluid motion of his fists were dodged by the other man. You could tell that he was growing tired of the devil missing his punches.
He snarled loudly before yelling, “I’m tapping out!”
Suddenly the wraps disappeared and the white suit returned. The crescent shaped knives were replaced with a long bow staff. Breaking it in half, he readied himself for the devil’s next attack.
He was quickly met with a kick to his face and the sharp inhale really proved how hard the kick was. The next rounded kick was stopped by the chain attached to Mr. Knight’s staff. The devil flipped back as he untangled the chain from his ankle.
It was like lightning the way that Mr. Knight moved. He threw his hook up towards a pipe and went into a sprint. Swinging himself around so that he could end up on the other side of the other man. Failing as the devil grabbed hold of his forearm and slammed him on the ground.
The sound alone made your ears ring. You stayed behind the car door watching them fight. It was the only battle you have seen up close, and boy did it not fail to both excite you and make you feel fear.
Continuing with his motion, the devil begins to punch the hero into the cement. Over and over. Until finally there was a sudden stop of movement.
Mr. Knight held the devil’s fist, straining to keep it from making contact with his face once again. You noticed that the man in red looked up suddenly at you. His intense gaze made shivers go down your spine.
“Oi, wait a minute I know you!” Mr. Knight said suddenly. “Daredevil! It’s Us!”
‘Daredevil’ snapped his head back down to look at Mr. Knight and pulled his fist away.
“Steven?” His rough voice sent more shivers down your spine. The tone sounded vaguely familiar, like you had heard it somewhere before.
“Yeah mate!”
The man in red stood up fully and held his hand out to help Steven up. You don’t understand fully how he didn’t recognize him, if you saw a suit that crisp you would have remembered immediately.
You stand surprised as the suit morphed back to the wrapped garment. It changed right in front of you, just like magic.
“Where’s your partner, Spector.” Daredevil asked. “You never go anywhere without them.”
He winced after the question. Something personal you supposed. “It’s the reason why I’m in America.” He leaves it at that.
Both men turn to look at you. You cower a bit not really knowing what they are about to do. The devil takes a step towards you, and you promptly take a step back. He holds up both his hands.
“I’m not here to hurt you.” He states. “I thought you were in danger.”
You narrow your eyes at him. “Yeah well, Sailor Moon beat you to it.”
“Hey!” The other hero said with offense in his voice.
You both turn to look at him. He hesitates a moment, most likely not going to say another word. How could you be meeting two heroes in one night? Well, not heroes, more like vigilantes it seemed like.
Clearing your throat, you looked around at the scene and wondered which lucky person would find that in the morning.
“This has been real fun, but I’d really like to go home and sleep.” You finally say. Daredevil and Mr. Knight both nod towards you as you start walking away.
“Let me walk you home.” A gruff voice says, turning to see Daredevil take a step towards you. It wasn’t a question, it was clearly a statement. “To make sure you get home safe.”
You shrug and walk towards the entrance of the parking structure. A voice calls from behind you both that makes you stop dead in your tracks.
“Hey Murdock, if you see my partner, give me a call…” Moonknight said with a hint of sadness in voice. You glance up at the vigilante beside you. Murdock. Matthew Murdock. The only Murdock you knew.
He reaches a hand up to touch your shoulder. Not believing what you had just heard, you flinch away. “Matt?” You managed to choke out.
“I’m sorry.” He says gently. “Let’s just get you home.”
“No.” Tears pricking your eyes. “You need to tell me what’s going on.”
“Fine.” He says before starting to walk again. You follow close behind him. Street after street you managed to keep up with him. Seeing the church come into view you realize that he was taking you to his own sanctuary.
Matt opens the side gate to the cemetery and steps aside so you could enter first. You step inside and head to the bench you both sat at when you were younger. He lingers a bit by the gate before entering and following you deep into the graveyard.
Once you both are inside, and he makes sure the coast is clear, he takes off his mask. Setting it down next to you, you stare at it. You cannot actually believe that you were saved by Daredevil. Well sort of.
And to make it all worse, Daredevil was your ex. Your knight in shining armor was someone who completely broke your heart. How poetic. You look up at him as he paces.
“You do realize how sacrilegious this is, right?” Your comment definitely breaks the ice. The smile that tugs on the corner of his mouth is only slightly comforting.
“This started way before the priest thing.” He stops pacing and sits next to you. “While we were together actually.”
“You’re joking.” Your mouth gapes open. He stays silent. “Oh god. You’re serious.”
He grabs the mask before speaking up. “ It’s partially the reason why we broke up.”
“What?” You his through your teeth. Was this guy serious right now? “What do you mean it's partially the reason why we broke up? You said you wanted to pursue a life of Christ, Matt.”
“I did! Didn’t I?!” He raised his voice. “I did what had to be done to protect you, y/n!”
You stood from the bench and put your hands over your ears. Not wanting to hear another word from his mouth.
“Okay what are you doing?” He asked.
“I don’t want to listen to you anymore!” You shout. “I mean do you even know how ridiculous that sounds!”
“I did it for you, y/n! I did all of this for you!”
Then there was silence. Not even the wind howled through the trees in that moment. Letting everything sink in, you felt your heart pounding against your chest. You bring your arms down in a folded position and stare at the man in front of you.
“I really was in love with you, Matt.”
“I’m still in love with you.” He stood as he confessed. “I think about you. Morning, Noon and Night.”
Air that was trapped in your lungs was released all at once. Like you have not been breathing for a whole year. You felt insane to think that this wasn’t some convoluted nightmare.
He took a step towards you, and you let him. Feeling like this had all happened for some divine reason, you let him take your hand. His glove was rough against your skin. You never broke your eye contact off of his face. Studying how his jaw tensed and untensed, or how his eyes always followed the sound of your voice.
“Please Matty.” You sniffle. “You broke my heart once. I can’t take it a second time.”
“I promise you, there won’t be a second time.” He says before leaning down and kissing you gently. It takes a moment for your brain to process what was happening. Once you realize it was in fact a real kiss, you kiss him back. Arms snaking their way around his neck and his around your waist.
The kiss becomes more hunger filled. You can tell you both were touch starved by the way your hands began to roam. His body was pressed into yours, and you could feel yourself getting more turned on every second.
“Sweetheart.” He says. “You smell so fucking good.”
You moan lightly against his lips. Taking his bottom lip between your teeth, you tug on it lightly earning yourself a low groan. The way it vibrated between both your chests went straight to your core.
“Matty. I need you.” You pant as you pull from him slightly. He cups your face with his hand and nods.
“I need you too, sweetheart.”
Rushing through the front door of the church, you kiss the man in front of you with an intense passion. You can’t remember the last time you were touched by a man. Let alone kissed by one.
The way he grabs your waist with his gloved hands was addicting. You feel every desire and you’re sure that he could smell your arousal. You begin pushing him towards a pew before he turns you around and stops the motion altogether.
“Wait.” Hearing his voice startled you. “We should move to somewhere more private.”
“Where? The only other place is your office, and I’m not about to be bent over a desk, Matt.”
He raises an eyebrow and looks in thought. Whatever was going through his head made your heart start to race. Taking your arm, he leads you towards the confessional booth pulling off his suit, and your own clothes in the process.
Once he is satisfied with how naked the both of you are, he climbs inside. You follow behind him and once he makes himself comfortable in the seat, you straddle his lap.
Leaving a trail of marks down his neck, you feel the heat of his hard cock against your stomach. Moaning from the sensation you readjust yourself and begin to slide him into you. You hear the way his breath catches as your tight cunt passes over his cock.
It’s silent in the church, the only sounds being made were the moans coming from you and the priest you had underneath you. You can’t help but wonder if this was the wrong thing to be doing. Despite those thoughts, you continue to lewdly whimper and sink yourself onto him.
“Oh Father Murdock, how fucking holy art thou” You smirk as you hungrily kiss him.
This makes him groan against you as he thrusts himself deeper inside you. Gasping loudly, you feel his cock in the pit of your stomach. How he managed to thrust that far into you was an act of God. You look down to watch his hips thrust up into you, and you push down onto his cock. It was absolutely breathtaking knowing that he was doing this to you.
“Y/N, you are going to be the absolute death of me.” He gapes, “You feel like absolute heaven.”
“I’m not going to last much longer, Matty” You clench around his length as you begin to bounce more sloppily.
You hear a slight growl creep up from the back of his throat before he grabs your thighs and flips you both over. This new angle had you at a curve, which made each thrust more earth shattering.
“You don’t get to come until I allow it.” His voice echoed through the small booth. Chills were sent up your spine. Looking up at this holy man through your lust filled eyes, you try to focus on every feature of his face. The way his jaw was tensed, and how his eyebrows furrowed.
The intensity of each thrust sent you into an overstimulated galaxy. Seeing stars was typically not what you experience in times like these. Then again, you both had not had sex in a long while.
His panting mixed together with the groans falling from his lips was drawing you to your edge. The little voice in your head kept repeating itself. ‘You don’t get to come until I allow it.’. Fuck did that have an affect on you.
Your moans began to sound more high pitched as the overstimulation hit you. He lowers his head to your chest, taking a nipple into his mouth and sucking on it harshly. The gasp you let out pleased him even more.
He continued to suck before moving his mouth to your neck, leaving small bruises here and there. You could feel his thrusts start to slow down as if he were getting tired.
“Pl- please, I'm begging you.” You whimper pathetically.
He smirks before whispering in your ear. “On the count of three. Okay, sweetheart?”
You nod as you groan loudly.
“One.”
His thrusts begin to pick up, as he fucks you harder than before.
“Two.”
Your cunt starts to clench around his cock as you try to hold on for that third number.
“Three.”
You both moan and pant as you come together. The pulse of his cock as it releases his hot seed into you feels good against your quivering pussy. Never before have you experienced an orgasm this good.
Breathing finally steadying out, you stare up at him. The sweat running down his forehead was very prominent. You noticed a smile beginning to make his way onto his face. You smile as well.
“What?” You ask quietly.
“I think this is the most sacrilegious thing I have ever done.” He says back in a whisper.
“Oh and not the vigilante thing?”
He shakes his head before pressing his forehead to yours. “How bout you tell me about what has your heart racing at the moment?” He says instead.
“I just didn’t think I would ever be doing this.”
“How about you share your confession then?” He says while giving you another small thrust making you moan.
“Oh…” You ponder. “Then, bless me, Father, for I have sinned.”
#daredevil#matt murdock#marvel#fanfiction#daredevil fanfiction#daredevil fandom#daredevil fic#charlie cox#imagine writer#fanfic writing#imagine#brief moonknight#moon knight#steven grant#marvel fanfiction#matt murdock x reader#matt murdock x you#matt murdock fic#matt murdock smut
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Making bear designs ... anybody else cautiously excited for Daredevil: Born Again?
(This teddy bear design will probably go up in my shop soon if anyone wants one to snuggle...)
#beardevil#daredevil#daredevil: born again#charlie cox#matt murdock#custom bear#custom plush#my username is also my etsy shop name#daredevil fandom#daredevil fanart#daredevil fandom pspsps
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Part 3, Chapter 17
Summary: After the events of S3, Matt Murdock is trying to once again balance life as a lawyer and a vigilante. But he’s been scarred by loss and betrayal - will a mysterious new neighbour help him heal? Or will her secrets drag him back into the darkness?
Notes: This is a slow burn romance with an original female character, told in 4 parts. There is mystery, intrigue, action/violence and angst - all the good stuff!
Also available on AO3 and Wattpad
Masterlist
Reference pics
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PART 3
Chapter 17
Over the next few weeks, they found their groove as a couple, their lives settling into a more predictable routine. Matt would go to work during the day, while Calina spent her time either at the library researching the pheromone case, or going to dance classes, baking with Mrs Schneider, or wandering the city trying to find inspiration for what she was meant to do with her life.
In the evenings, they would have dinner - usually in Matt’s apartment, although Calina was often the one cooking. Then they would just…be together. She would read to him. They’d play chess or listen to music. Occasionally they went to Fogwells to spar, or to the bar around the corner to play pool and have a quiet drink together.
And when the sky darkened to pitch black, Matt would become Daredevil. The lawyerly suit would switch to red leather, and his kind, beautiful eyes would disappear behind the menacing mask. Calina would kiss her vigilant goodbye on the rooftop and watch him disappear into the depths of the capricious city he loved.
She would wait up for him - either in her bed or his. They still kept separate apartments, though that was the only separate thing about their relationship. She would pass the time reading a book or talking to one of the other Widows on the phone, all the while trying not to think about the danger Matt might be facing.
In the small hours of the morning, he would return to her. Sometimes too exhausted to do more than collapse on the mattress beside her. When that happened, she would help him undress, pulling the tight fitting suit from his body, and guiding him under the covers of the bed. She would stroke her fingers through his mussed hair, the soothing motion causing him to hum with pleasure under his breath. Then she’d give him a soft, lingering kiss to his lips and whisper ‘Goodnight, my love’.
Sometimes he would return injured, and as much as she hated seeing the damage to his body, the alternative was him never returning at all.
And that was an unbearable thought.
So she would tend to his wounds with loving care. Cuts and scrapes would be cleaned and bandaged. Pulled muscles would be iced and massaged. Deeper wounds would be sutured and dressed. And afterwards, they would make love. A slow, tender, gentle kind of lovemaking that wouldn’t pull on stitches or cause him to re-open wounds. She would always protest - not wanting to hurt him any further - but then she would always relent. She needed the intimacy as much as he seemed to crave it. She needed that life-affirming act of connection. The tangible proof that he’d made it back home to her - alive, if not always in one piece.
Some nights, though…
Some nights he would come to her still riding high on adrenaline. He’d stalk through the bedroom door like a predator, his every sense locked on her, chest heaving with deep breaths as if he’d run straight to her side. He’d kick off his boots, wrench the mask from his face and grab her in a bruising kiss.
They didn’t make love on those nights.
He fucked her instead.
Fast and hard.
And she loved every exhilarating second.
At the end of the night - whether he came to her tired, or hurt or aroused - they always fell asleep together. Deeply and peacefully, entwined in each others’ arms, looking forward to the moment they’d wake and get to do it all over again.
It was a routine. Mundane even, if viewed from the outside. But it was something neither of them had ever experienced before. It was special. Precious and exciting.
And every week - at least once, sometimes twice - they would go on a date.
They took turns to organise the outing, and it became another game between them: who could plan the more interesting date.
For Calina’s first time, she went the opposite route from the Rainbow Room. Elegance and opulence was traded for a more visceral experience. No fancy suits or velvet dresses. No crisp linen table cloths and crystal wine glasses. Instead, the two of them wore denim and sneakers, and sat on pillows strewn on the floor around a low table. They drank bottles of beer and ate with their hands.
“How did you hear about this place?” Matt asked, scooping up some spicy chickpea stew with a piece of injera - a thin flatbread that seemed to serve as both the plate and the cutlery for the meal.
The first few minutes in this place had been an assault on his senses. The strong, heady scents of ginger, cinnamon, cardamon and multiple other spices that he couldn’t even recognise swirled around him. The chatter of the other customers resonated in the small, hidden-away restaurant, and the very air was moist and heavy from the heat of the kitchen. But once they were settled at their table - and the delicious food started arriving - he forgot all of that.
“To be honest, Google.” Calina replied, “I just searched for the most authentic Ethiopian restaurant in New York, and this one came up top of all the lists.”
“Why Ethiopian?”
She shrugged. “The food in the Rainbow Room was amazing - but so much of it was about the presentation. Each dish was a work of art - which you weren’t able to fully experience. This food is different. It’s not about the looks or how its plated, its all about the feel and the taste and how you experience it with others.”
Matt smiled at her reasoning. She always made an effort to play to his senses - whether it be the choice of a restaurant, or the fabric of a dress - and he loved her for it. “So you’ve eaten somewhere like this before,” he guessed.
“You could say that,” she said. “I had a mission in northern Ethiopia several years ago.”
“In Africa?”
She laughed at the disbelief in his voice. “Yes. That’s where Ethiopia is.”
Matt chuckled and ducked his head. “Sorry. Yeah, I know. I just…I’ve never even left the east coast, let alone this continent.”
There was so much that Calina had never experienced - simple things that most other people on the planet took for granted - which sometimes made her seem naive and unworldly. But, in other ways, she was so much more worldly than him. She’d traveled the globe, and encountered so many other cultures and lived so many different lives. And even though none of it had been through her own choice or free will, she’d still lived those lives. “Tell me about it,” he urged, continuing his quest to complete the picture of her past. “If you’re comfortable with sharing,” he added, not wanting to sound pushy.
Perhaps it was the alcohol that gave her the courage; or maybe she’d come to terms more with her past and her lack of culpability for what she’d done. Or maybe the ‘mission’ wasn’t as heinous as some of the others she’d been forced to carry out. Whatever the reason, Calina surprised him by actually opening up. “I was there for a few weeks with another Widow. We were posing as volunteers with Médecins Sans Frontières. There was a doctor - an immunologist - heading up a vaccination project in the northern rural villages near the border with Eritrea. Well, that’s what he claimed, anyway.”
“What do you mean?”
“He was illegally experimenting on the villagers - injecting them with a manufactured strain of anthrax, trying to perfect a bioweapon which he planned to sell to the highest bidder.”
“Jesus. And I suppose your bosses in the Red Room wanted to be the highest bidder?”
Calina laughed, the sound bitter and hollow. “No. Dreykov never paid for something he could just take instead. That’s why we were sent in. My job was to gain the Doctor’s trust and steal his research, and my partner’s job was to kill him.” She paused and looked away. “We both succeeded.”
The weight of those three words hung over the table, but Matt found himself unable to care too deeply about the fate of a man who harmed some of the most vulnerable people on the planet - people he was tasked to protect and care for.
Calina cleared her throat. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to dwell on that side of the story. I actually have a good memory associated with that mission - I think it was part of the reason I chose to bring you here.”
“Tell me,” he repeated.
“There was a nurse who worked on the project. She was a good person - she had no idea what the doctor was doing. She was Ethiopian herself, and was just trying to help the people of her country. She took me under her wing - I was only 20 at the time, and was playing the role of a guileless gap-year student, so I guess she felt protective of me. She used to take me out to her favourite restaurants for dinner and teach me all about her culture - like gursha.”
“What’s that?”
“It’s the act of feeding someone - a big thing in Ethiopia. It’s a sign of respect and friendship. She told me a fable about it - how there was once a cruel king who came up with a new method of starving his people. He would put them in an arena around a huge table of food, but give them only long silver spoons to eat it with. The people would try and try, but they could never get the spoons to their mouths.”
As Calina recounted the tale, her voice became soft and low, a lilting, melodic tone similar to the one she used when reading to him at night. She was a natural storyteller, and she held him captive with her words, the food forgotten in front of him.
“One day, one of the peasants had an idea: ‘Me to you, and you to me,’ he said to the others. And so they began feeding each other across the table using the long spoons. The king, angry at his failure, stormed out of the arena. But the people who had witnessed the spectacle returned home and tried it themselves, feeding each other at dinner that evening. But they had to do it by hand because they didn’t have long spoons.” Calina shrugged as the tale ended. “Whether its true or not, I like the message: that if we don’t feed each other, we all go hungry.”
“If we don’t work together, we all suffer.”
“Basically.”
“You do love a good proverb.”
She laughed, the mood successfully lightened from earlier. “Yeah, maybe that’s where I got it from. I couldn’t appreciate what the nurse said at the time - I couldn’t even appreciate the taste of the food that she fed me - but it stuck with me all these years.”
“And now you can appreciate it.”
“Yeah. Now I can. And now I get to share it with you.” She reached across the table to him, a piece of injera in her hand. He opened his mouth and she placed the food inside, brushing her thumb against his lower lip to catch a stray morsel of food.
He swallowed and caught her hand, kissing the tips of her fingers. “Thank you for sharing,” he said, both of them catching the double meaning of his words.
She smiled. “You’re welcome.”
———
When Matt planned a date, he used it as a chance to fill in some missing part of Calina’s adolescence. To let her ‘catch up’ some more.
One night he took her to see a movie, in a tiny independent cinema that had traditional red velvet seats and popcorn slathered in butter. He chose a showing of an old 80s action flick that he remembered seeing as a kid - which meant he could enjoy it along with her - although he ended up paying more attention to Calina than the movie. He smiled as she gasped at the plot twist, as she flinched at a sudden burst of gun fire, as she scoffed at the unrealistic martial arts scenes.
It was so much more entertaining than the film.
On a different date, he took her to the amusement park in Coney Island - the quintessential teenage hangout. As they strolled along the boardwalk hand in hand, Calina’s excitement was palpable. She kept squeezing his hand and exclaiming every time she spotted something new and interesting.
“Look,” she said, pointing to something in the distance. “There’s a rollercoaster!”
Matt laughed. “I can hear it, even if I can’t see it.”
“Sorry,” she said, and he heard the wince in her voice. “It’s just so…overwhelming. I’ve never been anywhere like this!”
He smiled, glad that he’d made the right choice. By the time they reached the entrance to Luna Park they were both chilled from the salt-laden breeze coming off the sea, the day overcast and slightly cooler than usual for early April. But Calina didn’t seem to mind. She was practically jogging by that point, dragging him with her as she headed for the first booth - an old-fashioned shooting game, where players were tasked with hitting a series of targets with an air rifle.
For someone with Calina’s training, hitting all the bullseyes would have been a piece of cake - and perhaps a little conspicuous. Matt knew she was used to hiding her skills, and hated to attract attention, so he wasn't surprised when she opted to play the part of a novice instead. The first time she fired off a shot, it went very wide of the mark. “Oops,” she laughed. “Guess it’s not as easy as it looks.”
Matt shook his head in amusement - until the man waiting in line behind them decided to voice his opinion. “See, this is what I always say, son,” he said to the young boy next to him. He spoke in a mock-whisper, clearly intending for his insults to be overheard. “Men just have better hand-eye co-ordination. Shooting comes more natural to us. Its evolution - we were out doing the hunting, while the women tended the fire in the cave.”
Matt raised an eyebrow at the misogynistic comment. But before he could interject, a quick series of ‘pings’, rang out - the sound of multiple targets being shot dead centre.
“We have a winner!” the attendant announced to the crowd. “Pick your prize, Miss,” he said to Calina.
She placed the rifle back down on the counter, chose an obnoxiously large stuffed bear, and walked off, pointedly ignoring the sexist asshole behind her.
“That was a thing of beauty,” Matt whispered to her as they moved away from the game. He draped his arm over her shoulder and kissed her cheek. “But I hope he didn’t spoil your fun.”
She laughed. “Hardly. The look on his face was the highlight of the day so far.”
“Well, lets see if we can top it. How about a ride on that rollercoaster?” He pointed to his right, where the sounds of mechanical whirring and terrified screaming were coming from.
She looked up at the tall structure. “Hmmm, I don’t know. It’s gotta be at least 120 feet high. With a 90 degree sheer drop, and all those loops…it looks far too tame and boring for someone who somersaults off skyscrapers every night.”
Matt shrugged, playing along. “It’ll be nice and relaxing. Maybe I’ll take a nap during the ride.”
She giggled in response, the sound so light and breezy. He’d noticed such a change in her over the past month. Gaining her freedom from Volkov had lifted a weight from her that he hadn’t even noticed before. She seemed younger, more relaxed. And he didn’t want anything to ever ruin that. He wanted to protect her from all the ugliness of the world - even the parts she'd already seen.
She deserved to be happy. To live her life like any other carefree woman in her 20s.
Which probably explained why he made such a stupid mistake six days later.
They were on another date, this time strolling along the High Line - a public park built on top of an old elevated freight train track. They’d just finished dinner in a nearby restaurant and were enjoying a stroll along the 30-feet high garden. The night sky was clear and dry, but the warmth of spring still hadn’t quite kicked in yet. Matt tucked Calina into his side, one arm wrapped around her shoulders to help her keep warm. “Should we just head home,” he suggested. “It’s colder than I thought it’d be.”
“I don’t mind. This is nice.” She burrowed a bit closer to him, her arm around his waist beneath his jacket, and they continued walking. They didn’t speak much, just content to enjoy the atmosphere and their time together.
Until a sudden breeze brought the scent of trouble.
Matt’s steps faltered ever so slightly as he picked up the familiar acrid smell of the fear pheromone.
Someone nearby was carrying a canister of it.
“Everything okay?”
“Yeah,” he lied. Then he lied some more. “I’m gonna grab us some hot chocolate.”
“Hot chocolate?”
“Yeah. I can smell a vendor’s cart underneath us. You wait here - go sit on that bench over there. I know your knee is hurting you.”
The last part was the truth, at least. Whenever Calina was on her feet for more than a few hours, it would start to twinge. He could always tell by the subtle change in her gait, the way she would favour her right leg a little more.
And he convinced himself that her injury was the reason he kept the truth from her. The reason he snuck away from her to follow the smell of the pheromone.
The reason he lied.
It was all to protect her.
But that rationale didn’t alleviate his guilt. His stomach churned with it as he jogged down the stairs to street level, folding away his cane and pulling the brim of his ball cap low to hide his dark glasses. His conscience nagged him as he tracked the scent trail along the block to his right.
But then he sighted his prey, and everything else fell away.
The man was loitering across the road, near the entrance to the 23rd street station. He was dressed in a suit and carrying a briefcase - very different from the thugs Matt had previously encountered with the pheromone spray. But the scent was unmistakeable. It clung to the man’s clothes, and was concentrated in his right pant’s pocket, which was distorted by a slight bulge.
As the man waited for…something…he kept reaching his hand into that pocket, as if to reassure himself that the canister was still present.
Matt’s phone vibrated in his own pocket - probably Calina wondering what was taking so long. He ignored it, causing his guilt to spike, but he couldn’t afford to lose this guy. They hadn’t had a decent lead in this case for months - they were still sifting through their list of suspects, and there’d been no recent attacks in Hell’s Kitchen to follow up on.
Which made sense, if the operation had moved here, to Chelsea.
The man across the street checked his watch - whoever he was waiting for was late. Matt checked his own watch and cursed - he’d been gone too long. He needed to tell Calina what was going on. He took out his phone to call her and noticed her message.
And his blood ran cold.
Man on the High Line carrying a briefcase full of pheromone canisters. I’m tracking him. Call me.
Matt quickly dialled her number but it rang out.
Shit.
He lifted his head and listened for the sounds coming from the direction of the park, but there was nothing to indicate where Calina was...
Then the screeching of tires.
Screams…
And the crunch of metal hitting flesh.
Matt ran. He ignored the man waiting by the station, his mission abandoned without second thought. He just turned on his heels and barrelled back down the street, somehow knowing - sensing in his gut - that the car accident had something to do with Calina.
He arrived at the scene in minutes. An abandoned saloon car, the hood caved in, sat in the middle of the junction. The sounds of distant sirens filled his ears as the first responders closed in…and a body lay on the road in a crumpled heap, several people crowded around it.
Heart in his throat, the organ pounding with fear, Matt muscled his way through the crowd to get closer. He took in the size of the body, the scent…
Then stumbled back, relief crashing over him.
It wasn’t her.
It wasn’t Calina.
But he could scent her on the air. She’d been here - just moments ago.
He grabbed the arm of a bystander. “What happened?”
“It- it was all so fast,” the woman stuttered, sounding shocked. “A man staggered into the street, he looked drunk. Then a car came out of nowhere - speeding, I think - and hit him.”
“He wasn’t drunk,” another voice chimed in. It came from the man in the news kiosk behind them. “He looked scared to death. A woman approached him - tried to help. But he just sprayed something in her face, then ran away from her, into the oncoming traffic.”
“The woman, what did she look like?”
“Young. Tall, beautiful. Jesus, I hope it wasn’t acid that he sprayed.”
Matt ignored him, his fear back with a vengeance. Calina had been hit with the pheromone.
Fuck!
“What happened to her?” Matt barked. “Where did she go?”
The man in the kiosk shook his head. “Dunno, man. I lost track. Like the lady said, it all happened so fast.”
“Where did he spray her?”
The man pointed further down the street. Matt ran, barging through the growing throng of gawking pedestrians. He tried to shut out the sounds of the chaos around him - the sirens getting louder, the car horns blasting in chorus, the mutterings and murmurs of the onlookers - he needed to blot out everything but Calina, and find her.
The pheromone scent grew stronger as he ran, until it concentrated at the front entrance of a high rise building. Calina’s scent was here too - as well as a hefty dose of adrenaline - and both disappeared into the building.
Matt shoved through the glass doors and into the foyer, and followed the trail to the bank of elevators. He slammed the button to call the elevator and started pacing the tiled floor in front of it, his heart thudding with terror as he waited, every second feeling like a lifetime.
He knew exactly where Calina had gone.
His mind kept replaying the memory from last year, of another terrified young woman dosed on pheromones that he’d failed to save.
The one who’d found the highest roof possible…and leapt to her death.
————–
Chapter 18 coming soon...
Remember to check out the references page!
Tag list: @hollandorks @stilldreaming666 @sio-ina-bottle @tearoseart-blog @acharliecoxedfan @freckledbabyyy @chezagnes
If you’d like to be added - let me know!
#daredevil#daredevil fic#tabula rasa#daredevil fanfic#daredevil fanfiction#daredevil x original female character#matt murdock#marvel's daredevil#matt murdock fanfic#matt murdock x oc#daredevil fandom
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The original comic ending was not it... soooo I did this. Because they deserve happiness
#fanart#art#daredevil comics#daredevil fanart#daredevil#daredevil fandom#daredevil devil regin#frisk suck#butch pharris#butchmike#mike murdock#mike butch#butchxmike#wilson fisk illegitimate son with matturdok twin?!?#matt murdock
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DAREDEVIL MUTUALS DID YALL HEAR??? EIGHTEEN EPISODES EIGHT FUCKING TEEN WE WONNNNNNNN
AND ITS CALLED BORN AGAIN
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𝐒𝐮𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐦𝐨𝐝𝐞𝐥 | 𝘔𝘢𝘵𝘵 𝘔𝘶𝘳𝘥𝘰𝘤𝘬
𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 🎀💕:
@yarrystyleeza If you want to be added check out my pinned post!
𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐬 💌:
my first Matt one - shot! I haven’t finished Daredevil yet but once I do, I’m sure there will be more one - shots about it, enjoy my lovelies and I’m hoping that soon I’ll start to gain an audience, who’ll appreciate my work :) ~Jess
𝐝𝐞𝐬𝐜𝐫𝐢𝐩𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 📝:
in which, Foggy drags Matt to a concert last minute and the woman lead singer’s voice has Matt adoring her (inspired by the song ‘Supermodel’ by Måneskin)
𝘔𝘢𝘵𝘵’𝘴 𝘗𝘰𝘷:
I groan hearing knocks on my front door, ‘who could that be? I mean it’s 5:30 in the evening’ I wonder to myself and I hear the knocks once more,
“Matt I know you’re in there, open the door right now!” Ah it’s Foggy, of course.
I unlock the door and I let Foggy in, he’s panting so that must mean that he ran here.
“Everything okay?” I ask and Foggy nods,
“Yeah I kinda got last minute tickets to a gig of a band that I like so I was wondering if you wanted to come?”
He asks in an excited tone,
“Oh I don’t know” I reply, concerts aren’t really my scene to be honest.
“There’s two lead singers and I’m sure that you’ll love the woman one, she’s like an angel honestly”
Eventually I give in,
“Okay I’ll go with you then, when’s the gig?”
“Tonight at 8”, was all Foggy said and he waited for me as I changed into something more casual.
Usually Foggy and me would walk everywhere but this time, we got a taxi as Madison Square Garden is at the other side of the city.
“So who’s the band we’re seeing?” I ask Foggy, “Uh Måneskin, they’re an Italian rock band, won Eurovision, they’re pretty good!”
“Seems interesting”, I respond
“They definitely are”
There was no support act beforehand so we went in just as they came on the stage, the two of us are at the back of the pit.
ᴅᴀɴᴄᴇ, ᴅᴀɴᴄᴇ, ᴅᴀɴᴄᴇ, ᴅᴀɴᴄᴇ, ᴅᴀɴᴄᴇ ᴜɴᴛɪʟ ɪ ᴅɪᴇ
ᴍᴇᴅɪᴄᴀᴛᴇ ᴍʏsᴇʟғ 'ᴛɪʟ ᴍʏ ʜᴇᴀᴅ ɪs ɪɴ ᴛʜᴇ sᴋʏ
as the beat dropped so did a curtain and Foggy was screaming so loud,
“Stop screaming!” I tell him,
but of course he doesn’t listen and continues to scream more and more.
ᴛʜᴇʀᴇ's sᴏᴍᴇᴛʜɪɴɢ ɪɴ ᴛʜᴇsᴇ sᴛʀᴀɴɢᴇʀs
ᴍᴏᴍᴇɴᴛᴀʀʏ ғʟᴀᴠᴏᴜʀs
ɪ ᴅᴏɴ'ᴛ ᴡᴀɴɴᴀ sʟᴇᴇᴘ ᴀᴛ ᴀʟʟ
I admit I was surprised by her voice and as Foggy said, her Italian accent mixed with her singing truly made her sound like an angel.
“You’re right Foggy, she does sound like an angel” I shout at Foggy over the music
“See I told you! you gotta 𝘴𝘢𝘷𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺 𝘮𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘯𝘵”
Foggy and me danced and screamed together, I had a good time letting loose for once,
once the concert is over we walk outside, I was about to call for another taxi until I hear Foggy scream once more,
“Oh my god, she’s over there, we gotta get a photo!” and with that, Foggy and I run over to her
“Hey, I saw you guys in the crowd, you looked like you were enjoying yourselves”
“We were, it was amazing, wasn’t it Matt?”
“Oh yeah totally, Foggy and me loved it!”
I reply and Foggy speaks once more,
“You’re cool and I absolutely love your voice I was wondering if you’re single?”
“Oh yes I am, you’re both really cute by the way, here’s my number for you both”
“I’m surprised to hear that like how are you single?” I ask her,
“I just haven’t found the right person yet I guess”
Foggy and I say our goodbyes to her as other fans wanted to see her too, although I think that won’t be the last time that both Foggy and I see that angelic singer.
#daredevil fanfiction#daredevil fandom#daredevil#charlie cox#elden henson#matt murdock#foggy nelson#matt murdock fanfic#matt murdock x reader#matt murdock x you#matt murdock fluff
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Current mood
#jamie speaks#daredevil#daredevil fandom#daredevil fanfiction#matt murdock#daredevil oc#mcufam#mcu fanfiction#daredevilblindspot#current mood
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I need him in a way nobody could understand
I swear....you can guess what I am thinking right now abot these pictures of a Devil himself
#daredevil fluff#daredevil imagine#daredevil fandom#daredevil fanfiction#daredevil fanart#daredevil#matt murdock imagine#matt murdock fanfic#matt murdock fanart#matt murdock x reader#matthew
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Good shows have religious themes and intros with a red liquid forming a human figure
#daredevil#hannibal#hannibal lecter#hannibal fandom#daredevil fandom#matt murdock#william graham#matt murdock my beloved#I just noticed that#I fucking love Hannibal#GOD I should rewatch daredevil
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Awesome commission I worked on last year for @amazing-spiderling it was really cool working with you cat!
#matt murderdock#spider gwen#spider gwen universe#daredevil#artist on tumblr#artist of tumblr#fanartist#commissions#commission#marvel#artists of tumblr#my art#fanart#artists on tumblr#daredevil fanart#daredevil fandom#daredevil art
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Matt Murdock will raise again to save Hell's Kitchen from real Devils! Fanart of Matt Murdock from Daredevil Born Again Reference taken from DD's set photos of Charlie Cox. I'm really excited for this show ever!! still missing those days of Daredevil Netflix hope this one will be more good!
youtube
#youtube#digital art#mcu#marvel#marvelcinematicuniverse#digital portrait#digital sketch#ibispaintx#digital painting#daredevil#daredevil born again#charlie cox#daredevil fanfiction#daredevil fluff#daredevil fic#daredevil fandom#daredevil fanart#matt murderdock#matt murdock edit#matt murdock fanart#matthew murdock#matt murdock#matt murdock fanfic#matt murdock fluff#matt murdock fem!reader#she hulk fanart#she hulk#netflix series#netflix daredevil#daredevil netflix
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Guardian angel; Matt Murdock x teen daughter reader
*Author’s note*
Okay this little idea randomly popped into my head over the weekend so I decided to post it up here and see what you all think. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, we NEED MORE DAREDAD FICS!!! Seriously this man DESERVES happiness *ted talk over*
Now the way I picture this fic is like PRE S.1 like just before the events of the first episode of the series. The early days of Matt being daredevil or in this case the Man in the Mask aka the Devil of Hell’s kitchen.
Warnings: fluff, some angst, teen pregnancy (protection was used but remember kids wrap it before you tap it), some chaotic religious aspects shown but not acted upon,
Taglist:
@plethora-of-things
@waddles03
@psychosupernatural
@queensdivas
@queen-paladin
@jd-johndeacon-or-jackdaniels
@gay-and-ready-to-cry
@austynparksandpizza
__________________________________________________________
I knew I couldn’t hide this forever. It was only a matter of time before he got too suspicious or worse found out about me and Austin’s…..I took a heavy breath as I bounced my leg anxiously and rubbed my hands over my face.
I heard my phone rang and across the screen was my favorite picture of Austin playing his acoustic guitar and my name for him flashed across the screen, “The King” with three heart emojis and a king emoji. He was asking for a Facetime which I accepted.
“Hi baby.”
“There’s my best girl.” I blushed as I ducked down.
“You know what that nickname does to me.”
“And I’ll still say it an infinite amount of times just to see you get flustered every time.”
Austin Callahan, probably one of the cutest boys at St. Maria’s Catholic School. Captain of the swim team and the basketball team, honor student, and the nicest guy in the world who loves listening to Elvis music as well as all the oldies rock and roll? Could there be any other dream guy?
Not only that but we had been friends since we started our High school year until just last year at homecoming, he admitted to having feelings for me as he gave me a handmade rose he made from one of the napkins (I still have it to this day in my pencil cup on my desk at home). From there our romance began to shine.
Of course being in a relationship, there was no hiding it from my dad. Well when your dad is a lawyer like Matthew Murdock of “Nelson & Murdock” obviously you can’t hide anything from him. Believe me I’ve tried in the past and he finds out every time.
Which is why I’ve taken up residence at my all-time bff Maddie’s place. It’s not much (Hell’s kitchen never is) but it’s home, nevertheless. The reason why I’m sleeping over at my friend’s house almost indefinitely is because—I’m pregnant. Yep, 17 years old and I’m pregnant just short of a month and a half.
Past couple of weeks I’ve been getting really sick, like even just the smell of Hell’s kitchen’s smog is enough to make me puke my guts out. I also began to realize that I hadn’t gotten my period yet. So one day after school with Maddie at my side, we went to the local doctor’s office, told them about my symptoms and my late period and after some blood work and a pregnancy test, I came back positive.
Austin was the first person to tell and he was shocked at first but he took me by the hands, looked me in the eye and swore to me that he wasn’t gonna leave me like his daddy did him and his mama. I was at least thankful to God above that I had the support of my friends and Austin, but the biggest hurdle was yet to come. My dad.
My dad is not just a Man of the Law, he’s also a Man of God. Not like holy religious that he beat the script of every verse of the Bible into me, or told me everyone is a sinner and everyone is going to Hell should they not repent (thank God). But he did raise me to be a good Catholic girl ever since my mom died of cancer when I was only 2 years old.
He told me to always be aware of my surroundings, know the temptations, and don’t let anyone take advantage of you. And just like that I gave into temptation and now I paid the price (before you say it YES we did use protection).
“How you feeling sweetheart? You ducked out of Chemistry class pretty quick.”
“I’d rather not relive that. I tried so hard to keep it in but that crap that Hilary was wearing as perfume became too much. I mean really there’s a reason why you don’t put on perfume in a classroom especially in a chemistry class. Can’t perfume catch fire or something?”
“Some can. But that scent she claimed she bought from Paris, she’d be a human candle if she got one knick of a Bunsen burner.” I laughed and said.
“Maddie gave me the homework for that class, god I still don’t get how you can understand all that stuff.”
“It’s not that hard really. I mean, we found good chemistry right?” I rolled my eyes and told him.
“That has literally got to be the worst cheesy pickup line I’ve ever heard.”
“Can’t blame me if I’m crazy positive about you.”
“Stop!” I whined as he laughed.
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry I swear I’m done now.” He said through his adorable laughter. “So you at Maddie’s again?”
“Yep. Thankfully my dad seems to buy into the fact that we’re doing a project together for history class and I just keep falling asleep here.”
“Wait but didn’t you guys finish that project last week?”
“Yeah but my dad don’t need to know that.”
“Babe. How long are you gonna hide your pregnancy from him?”
“I was thinking….maybe by the time our kid’s out of high school?” he raised his brow at me. “Okay, okay fine! I’ll…..I’ll tell him tomorrow after school. Will—will you be there with me?”
“Anything to take the tension off. It took two to tango after all. Plus I met your dad before, I know he’ll be okay with this.”
“I just….” I trailed off looking down at the ground sadly.
“What? What is it (Y/n)?”
“What if he doesn’t?”
“Babe…..”
“No, no Austin just—just listen for a second. Sure my dad’s cool, he’s a kickass upcoming lawyer. He’s not embarrassing, he’s not overbearing when it comes to us being Catholic, but what if he doesn’t want me anymore? Teenage pregnancies are frowned upon and as soon as I start really showing the signs, those hens are gonna cluck.”
“Then let them cluck. It’s not any of their business. This is about us, about you. Our child. Yes we’re still kids and yeah we’re still in school just about to get into adulthood, this is our life. If you still want to have this baby, I’m in. But if you change your mind down the line, I’ll support that too. Because we’re in this together baby girl.”
“How did I ever get so lucky to get you as my boyfriend?”
“Believe me, if anyone’s lucky it’s me. How I ever managed to convince you to be my girlfriend is a miracle that only the good Lord knows.” I smiled and said to him.
“Goodnight king.”
“G’night pretty mama.” He couldn’t help but say in his best Elvis impression. I smiled and kissed my hand before blowing him a kiss and he did the same for me before winking at me and we ended the facetime call.
“I swear the way you two talk to each other makes me want to puke out butterflies and rainbows.” Maddie’s voice said. I turned and she came in with some tomato soup, saltine crackers and pickles.
Another strange thing during my pregnancy is that every now and then I’m getting these cravings for the weirdest shit. Like just the other day, I had sliced orange slices as a side dish for my mashed potatoes and everyone knows how much I loathe oranges (even the smell of them has made me gagged for years). And yet I needed them, or I guess the baby needed them.
“Well that is if your strange food combos don’t make me first. You know how I’ve hated even looking at pickles.”
“I know I’m sorry. But you’re the best for getting some for me.” I said as I took a sliced pickle and put it between two crackers and ate it like a sandwich. Maddie gagged and turned away as she turned on her tv and switched it to MTV to see our favorite show Ridiculousness was on.
“Ohhh I love this one with Sage. The Jeremy category makes me die everytime!” I exclaimed.
“I know right! But you also can’t beat when Ryan Sheckler came on the show and the animal stalkers category. That cat one still makes me think it was a weeping angel.”
“Right!? I swear all cats are the weeping angels familiars. I don’t care what any whovian says prove me wrong.” I said after slurping up my soup.
“So were you like for real about not telling your dad about the baby?” I dropped my spoon back into the bowl and set the tray aside.
“I thought you said you’d work on your snooping in on other people’s phone calls?”
“I did but when it’s a call this serious about my future godchild, I should have some say in it. And Austin’s right, you gotta tell your dad.”
“I know I should but…..do you remember what happened when Katelyn first came out as bisexual. Her parents completely disowned her and now she’s living with her cousin MJ in Queens. I got no other family to go to, what if my dad isn’t cool with…..I mean yeah I’ll have Austin and you but—”
“I get it. Really I do. I’ve seen how close you and your dad are, hell I’d trade my dad for yours any day.” I playfully shoved her.
“Your dad’s sweet.”
“Yeah sweet like a fly buzzing around me every second. Constantly in my business, wanting to look through my phone, I swear he’s the definition of a helicopter parent.” I looked down as I placed my hands over my lower abdomen where the baby was slowly growing. “Hey,” Maddie wrapped an arm around me and I looked up at her, “Your dad loves you. He’s not like those crazy parents we’ve seen that come to preach about the Lord’s will or the End of the world. He won’t give up on you, I can just feel it.”
“I hope your right Maddie. I really hope so.” I looked at the clock and saw that it was just after 10:30pm. “I’m getting kinda sleepy, think I’ll turn in for the night.”
“Yeah I’m gonna head to bed myself. Night (n/n).”
“Night Mads.” We hugged each other and she went across the hall into her room while I snuggled into my bed in her sister’s room (she had left for college in LA so it’s been used as a guestroom) and tried to get some sleep.
Time ticked by and while I was asleep and my eyes were shut, my brain was just buzzing with so many thoughts, fear and anxiety. I got up from the bed and opened up the window that was near the fire escape and decided I needed some fresh air.
The cold autumn night wind blew over my thin pajama bottoms. I almost wish I had grabbed a hoodie or her sister’s old fleece blanket before scaling up onto the roof. I sat along the edge and just stared out into the city as I listened to the sounds of the sirens that passed by, the occasional stray dog barking or people shouting at each other.
“A bit cold to be up here by yourself.” A voice said behind me. I jumped out of my skin and was surprised to see the latest vigilante that had been rumored to be running around Hell’s kitchen.
Unlike the Avengers, this man is said to be brutal against his enemies. Unleashing his untamable wrath on the scum of Hell’s Kitchen but he never kills them (if you ask me from some of stories I hear, I’m surprised they aren’t dead).
The upper half of his face was covered with a black mask with no holes for his eyes. Seriously how is he able to see through that material? His whole attire was black with a skin-tight black shirt showing off every bit of muscle on his upperbody, thick black pants and black combat boots.
“Coming from the guy wearing a skin-tight t-shirt.”
“You’ve got a quick wit.”
“Smart-mouth Murdock some of the kids call me at school. That’s why I’m co-Captain of the debate team.”
“Co-captain? I would assume you’d be captain.”
“Well there’s always someone clever than you, not to say he isn’t a good captain but he can be an asshole at times.” He turned to me. If I could see under the mask, I’d assume he’d be judging me for my foul language. “Pardon my French.”
“I’ve heard worse. Mind if I sit?”
“I’d assume you’d be out there knocking out bad guys. You know kicking ass and taking names.” He let out a scoffed chuckle.
“I prefer not to take names. That’s one difference between the Avengers and me. I would prefer my name to not be publicly known. Not for my sake but for the people around me.”
“I get that.” I replied softly. “I mean look at Captain America. He shouldn’t even bother with a mask cause everyone knows his name. And don’t get me started on Stark’s public announcement, “I am Iron-man”. No wonder why those aliens came for us if the heroes are publicly announcing to the world ‘hey we’re the big and strong Avengers and you can’t do anything about it’. And next thing you know BAM! Aliens are flying in kamikaze style and nearly blowing us all to hell.”
“A bit cynical for one so young.”
“Sorry. I get snippy and cynical when I’m anxious or stressed.”
“And why’s that?”
“I—” I trailed off. He slowly scooted closer to me and said to me in a soft assuring manner.
“If you don’t want to tell me, that’s fine. But I’ve been told I’m a pretty good listener. Plus with the mask you won’t get any judgmental looks from me.” I picked at my nails as well as stroking my lower abdomen with my pinkie and ring fingers.
“The whole aspect of catholic guilt it—it’s eating me alive.”
“Catholic guilt?”
“You don’t want to hear this. This is just dumb teenage drama that all adults try to pin us with even when we’re going through some really hard and tough shit. It’s not always just teenage drama we have our own problems that you folks don’t seem to get and—” I went on a ramble until I felt him ground me by placed a hand on top of my shoulder.
“Hold on now, take a deep breath.” I turned to him and even through his black mask, I could almost feel the gentleness of his eyes as he had his body fully turned to me, giving me his full attention. I slowly but sharply breathed in through my nose before exhaling shakily.
I did this a couple more times until they became deep, steady breaths.
“There we go. I could hear your heart racing erratically and you were on the verge of a panic attack.”
“You—can you really hear a person’s heartbeat? Or are you just messing with me?”
“It’s a long story but I have enhanced senses that allows me to hear better than most.”
“Wow. That is both dope and freaky at the same time.”
“I apologize if it’s invasive. I don’t mean to do it on purpose.”
“Call me crazy but I believe you.” A slight smile came at the corner of his lips.
“So shall we get back to that spill on catholic guilt?” I bowed my head.
“I was kinda hoping you’d forget about that.”
“I don’t mean to push. But I just feel like you want to talk to someone about this. Someone who isn’t a friend.”
“It’s……my dad.”
“Your dad? Wait he—he doesn’t hurt you, does he?”
“No nothing like that. He’s the best. I swear he’s like my best friend, well after Maddie but still he’s sweet, he’s caring, he’s compassionate. He raised me all by himself for so long that I—I’m afraid he won’t be with me anymore.”
“I’m sorry. I mean eventually we all have to die at some point in our lives. But I’m sure that won’t be for a long, long time for your dad. Unless he’s—”
“I’m not talking about losing him to old age or cancer. I’m talking about that he’ll never speak to me again!” I snapped.
God this pregnancy already has got me so antsy that even the slightest thing in my already stressed out mind, can make me explode. He froze in his spot and it looked like his body was tense at my sudden outburst.
“Jesus Christ,” I muttered burying my face into my hands. “The truth is I—I found out just a week ago, that I’m…..I’m a month and a half pregnant with my boyfriend’s baby.”
If I could see under his mask, I’d bet his eyes are bulging out from underneath the satin material.
“Yeah. Pregnant at 17. Go ahead and make assumptions, call me names.”
“You’re sitting next to a guy who goes around wearing a skin-tight shirt and a mask that beats up bad guys late at night. As far as I’m concerned, I am the last person who should be judging you.” He adjusted in his spot as he asked me, “Does the father know?” I nodded.
“Yeah. He was the first person to find out after my best friend. And he’s been nothing but supportive. Even though we’re just about to graduate high school, he’s willing to help out with anything.”
“It’s just you’re afraid to tell your own father about your pregnancy.”
“Don’t get me wrong he’s a great guy. Like I said never once raised a hand to me, was fair in his punishments when I needed them. And he’s not like those so called ‘preachers of God’ that you see out in the streets proclaiming the Lord’s Will and the End of the world. But—he always told me to be careful especially around boys.”
“Were you careful?”
“Yes! Austin had the condoms and everything! But it still happens you know.”
“No I know. I remember my days in health class.” I shook my head shamefully.
“I just…..it’s always just been me and my dad. My whole life he’s always been there for me. Whenever life got tough, no matter how busy he was, he always took the time to check up on me. Even if it’s just a quick hug or a peck on the nose before calling me his ‘guardian angel’. What if—what if he hates me? Or decides I’m not his sweet guardian angel anymore but a shameful harlot of Lucifer?”
Tears stung behind my lashes and I harshly tried to wipe them away but that caused them to start falling down my face. I curled myself inward before choking out.
“I need him now more than ever but I—I feel like he won’t be there for me this time. That when I reach my hand out for him, he’ll turn me aside and I’ll be drowning in the unknown world of parenthood. The guilt, the anxiety, forcing us to drift further and further apart from one another until I…..” I sniffled and wiped more tears as well as my nose with my sleeve. “I feel so alone.”
I felt his hand gently stroke down my hair before it moved down to my back, his gloved hand rubbing soothing circles on my back.
“He won’t abandon you. I promise.”
“You can’t promise that.”
“Yes I can.”
“How?” I choked out as I looked up to him. I saw as his jaw tensed up before he said.
“Because…because I have a daughter.” I looked at him surprised. Of course, superheroes and vigilantes can have their own lives they don’t have to be full-time superheroes 24/7.
But who would’ve thought that the Man in the Mask aka the Devil of Hell’s Kitchen was a parent.
“You’re a……”
“She’s just around your age. And she means—the world to me. I would want her to be able to come to me for anything, to not be afraid to speak to me. But if she ever did feel the same fear you are now, then I’ve failed as a father.”
“No I—I’m sure you didn’t. It would have nothing to do with your parenting skills, it’s just…..I’ve had friends who had parents just as loving as my dad is. But when they admit to something that goes against their religious code, they disown them or try to repent their sins.”
“But you said your father isn’t like those types of people, right?” I nodded. “I won’t lie. He will be shocked at the news, but give him time to process things and he might just surprise you for what he has to say.”
“I know I should tell him. I can’t hide at Maddie’s forever. But there’s still a lingering voice in my head telling me that when I do tell him, it’ll be the last time I ever see him. I’d give anything to shut that voice up.”
“If you’d like, I could have a word or two with that nagging voice in your head.” That brought probably the first real laugh out of me ever since finding out about my pregnancy.
“I hope those words aren’t with your fists.” He softly laughed.
“No, I mean a real talk. I’d tell it, ‘Alright you negative worm. Stop filling this poor girl’s head with scenarios that aren’t true. Go make like a tree and get out of here!’”
“It’s leaf. It’s make like a tree and leaf.”
“Right that’s it.” I shook my head as I kept laughing.
“You know, you’re not what I’d thought you’d be like.”
“Mean and scary?” I nodded. “Oh to most I’m terrifying but—I have a soft spot for those that are lost. Don’t tell anybody though. Can’t have the scum of Hell’s kitchen thinking I’m too much of a softie.”
“Your secret’s safe with me.”
“As is yours. Now you promise me you’ll tell your father in the morning?”
“Yes. First thing after school.”
“Good.” He said patting my knee. “It’s late, you should get some sleep. You’re not just sleeping for yourself anymore now.” I rubbed my lower abdomen. As he walked away and stood along the edge of the roof I told him.
“Thank you.” He turned to face me and gave me a soft nod before leaping off the roof and he disappeared into the night. I scaled back down the fire escape and re-entered Maddie’s sister’s room and got back into bed.
As promised after school I stood by mine and dad’s apartment and took a deep breath in before exhaling.
“You sure you don’t need me to go in with you anymore baby? You know I don’t mind.” Austin told me.
“No sweetie, I—I need to talk to my dad about this alone.”
“Okay. If he shows leniency, give me a call later?” I nodded. He leaned forward and we kissed each other before he continued on his way home. I took another deep breath and entered the apartment and headed for the elevator.
Once the elevator dinged on our floor, I walked down the hallway until I reached the apartment room. Taking out my key I took another deep breath in and muttered.
“Okay, he won’t get mad. He won’t get mad. Just—tell him the truth. He’ll understand. He’s cool, he’s my dad and he loves me.” I placed the key into the lock, turned it to the left and heard the click and opened it up.
“Uh-huh, yeah. Alright yeah we can make it. Yes of course, thank you. Yes and have a good afternoon to you too, bye.” I heard my dad’s voice say as I walked through the front hallway until I got to the spacious (as spacious as a New York apartment in Hell’s kitchen can be). “Well look whose returned. Finish your project already?”
“Dad I—I gotta tell you something.” I came right out with it.
“Okay, and what would that be?”
“Can we sit down on the couch?” he nodded before walking from the kitchen to the living room as we both sat on the couch.
“Is everything okay? Are you okay? Did someone hurt you?” he asked as he reached his hands out to cup my face. I took his hands and held them between us.
“I’m fine dad. Physically I am.”
“And what about emotionally?” he asked concerningly.
“Dad, I…..I lied to you. I wasn’t at Maddie’s for a project.”
“You-you—you lied to me? Then where were y—you weren’t at Austin’s were you? (Y/n) we’ve talked about this you’re not old enough to sleepover at a boy’s……”
“Dad I wasn’t at Austin’s either. I was at Maddie’s just not for a project.”
“Okay then I’m lost. (Y/n) sweetheart you’re starting to scare me. Whatever it is you can tell me, you know that right?” he asked as he scooted himself as close as he could get to me and wrapped his arm around me.
“Dad I—the reason why I was at Maddie’s was because I……I’m—” come on just say it. I swallowed a large lump in my throat and felt my leg beginning to bounce anxiously. “Promise you won’t get mad.”
“Go on.”
“You didn’t promise.”
“That’ll depend on what news I’ll be hearing. If it’s something illegal you know I won’t be happy.”
“Not really illegal. God I don’t know why I can’t just say it! Why can’t I tell you that I’m a month and a half pregnant!? I—” my mouth stopped as I realized how I had said it. I looked at my dad anxiously and saw how he just sat there flabbergasted.
“Y-you-you’re…..” he leaned back against the couch and just sat there limp like a ragdoll.
“Daddy? Are you—okay?”
“Just….need to process this.”
“Okay.” I muttered as I fiddled with my uniform skirt. We sat there in silence for a few minutes before he finally spoke out.
“Is it Austin’s?”
“Yeah. I swear dad we used protection but it—” he held out his hand telling me he didn’t need to hear anything else. Oh shit this is it. He’s gonna flip his lid, he’s pissed now. Way beyond pissed!
“And you’re sure you’re really pregnant? How did you even get an appointment and why wasn’t I notified?”
“Maddie has an aunt. Her aunt Claire performed the test and she was sworn to secrecy to not notify you.” He rubbed his hands against his face as he let out a deep sigh, his leg bouncing rapidly. Whether in anger or anxiety I couldn’t tell.
“Baby girl, why-why wouldn’t you tell me when you first found out? Why did you go through all of this trouble to lie to me about it?” my heart ached with guilt as tears began forming in my eyes.
“I’m sorry daddy. I—I was scared. Scared that you’d disown me or kick me out with no remorse or hesitation. Everytime I wanted to tell you, my brain kept showing me all the possibilities of you never wanting me to be in your life ever again. That you’d hate me or never say you had a daughter.”
I couldn’t look at him anymore so I closed myself into the edge of the couch and sniffled as I wiped my tears away. I felt dad’s hand gingerly stroke down my hair before coming down to lift my chin up.
I noticed how he had taken his red shades off and placed them on the table. Very rarely does he ever take them off, even around me but when he does, it’s always because he wants to connect with me (even though he’s blind). His unfocused gaze was staring in my general direction as he said to me.
“I’m not mad at you.”
“Y-you’re not?”
“No. I’m—taken by surprise don’t get me wrong. But it takes more than you getting pregnant at 17 for me to ever, ever, ever, think about disowning you or telling you you’re no longer my child.”
“Really?” I whispered.
“Yes.” He said giving me a nod. “So don’t ever go thinking like that again, okay?” my lip trembled as I nodded. “Okay?”
“Yeah.” I choked out.
“Okay.” I immediately hugged him as tightly as I could as I buried my face into his shoulder. His arms immediately wrapped around me as he chuckled softly.
“Oh daddy I’m so sorry I hid this from you!” I wept.
“I know you are angel. It’s okay now, it’s okay.”
“It’s just….I love you so much and I thought you’d—”
“Hey none of that now. There will be no more talk about the paranoid ‘what if’s’ in this apartment. There will never come a time when I tell you to get out of my life or that you aren’t my daughter anymore.” He said as he had me look up at him and he wiped away my tears. “You’re the most important person to me angel, and nothing will ever change that.”
I buried my face into my dad’s shoulder again and hugged him once again.
“I love you daddy.”
“And I love you my little guardian angel. I love you so, so much. And nothing will ever change that.” He said giving me a reassuring squeeze before kissing my forehead as many times as he possibly could.
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