This has been on my mind since S2 and Sharon's "truth will set you free" line but with this season, it's becoming even more evident...

MANTRA by Bring Me The Horizon is basically Richmond

Before the truth will set you free, it'll piss you off

Sharon to Ted back in S2. Very obvious there BUT the next line

Before you find a place to be, you gotta lose the plot

We heard the commentators mention Richmond having "lost the plot" in their anger towards Nathan having ripped up the BELIEVE sign. But it can also just as easily be Ted in the way he seems distant from his team. He's not really coaching this season. Says things here and there but it's nothing compared to the constant optimism he had previously.

Or Colin, who is constantly feeling like an outsider even with his great teammates and bestie Isaac. He still hasn't really found his place either. With the way the coaches took him out of the starting lineup and how that seemed to have hit him hard. He's hiding a part of him to protect himself because he's not sure he's safe.

And it could even be Jamie the first two seasons. He was the one scoring the goals but he didn't actually have a place in Richmond. He was a bully. And although having him sent back to Man City just as Ted was getting through to him probably hurt...it did help him appreciate Richmond more. He had to "lose the plot" there to find his place as one of Richmond's forwards.

I'm not vibrating like I oughta be I need a purpose, I can't keep surfing Through this existential misery

Ted this season, again, seeming detached and out of it. He's found out his ex wife has been seeing her ex therapist. The one he felt was teaming up on him with his wife during their sessions. And then being told he's a mess by Sassy so casually. As if that isn't a sensitive topic you can just throw out there just cuz you two fucked.

When we were first introduced to Ted back in S1, we saw that his marriage was not working. But he still seemed so positive and optimistic. I mean, Rebecca and Trent Crimm Independent couldn't help but end up liking him. Whenever the team was feeling down, he'd find a way to motivate them. And now it's just "don't worry, y'all are doing great 🙂👍"

Or Keeley. She's also usually quite optimistic and happy. She says so herself this episode. But now she's needing to schedule times for her to cry because she's so overwhelmed. And she's still in pain over the breakup although she tries not to think too hard about it.

But if I choose my words carefully Think I could fool you that I'm the guru Wait, how do you spell epiphany?

This is Zava. I don't think I need to go too deep into this but..."I am an empty vessel filled with gold. I am your rock, mold me." He spews this flowery inspirational bullshit and that's why not only fans adore him because of his skills, but his teammates too. Even though, eventually, they'll start to see through him. (And Jamie did right from the start)

And I know this doesn't make a lot of sense But do you really wanna think all by yourself now?

The importance of allowing others to help you. This is the start of the bridge and it's basically Ted's speech to the team after Zava's left. But here, it's emphasising the importance of support. Roy offering to train Jamie when he hears his concerns regarding Zava is an example of that. Sort of. But even though the show talks about teamwork and support, ofc not asking for it is what's causing some problems.

Ted hiding his feelings with his optimism and enthusiasm, Colin only really having his bf to talk to about queer shit (Trent will come in clutch surely), Rebecca spiralling and kind of starting to believe the words of some rando so on and so forth etc. etc.

All I'm asking for's a little bit of faith You know it's easy to believe

Again, Ted's speech to the team post-Zava. It was easy to believe in Zava. The way he praised those around him. But only so they would pay attention to him. Make him feel like the god he thinks he is. But he's not there any more. Which means, if they want to change, they need that belief regardless if there's some insanely famous and talented player on their team. Because that's not what makes a good team anyways. Belief is the foundation of this team and the foundation of the Lasso Way. (Even if Ted does not always truly believe in himself)

And here's this last line that's very brief but very much one character in particular.

Cause all you ever do is chant the same old mantra

"I am a strong and capable man." Over and over and over. It's implied that Colin doesn't fully believe himself when he says that. Because then he wouldn't need to remind himself. And if he had an elder queer (come on Trent) to talk to, maybe he'd feel even just a little bit more at ease. And it's not entirely the same as talking with Michael. His bf said it himself, he doesn't know football so probably doesn't understand the social environment within that area. So all Colin has is his mantra.

There are a few other lines I didn't put in because, tbh, couldn't really think of anything there. Or there just wasn't much to say. But with the ones I did mention ? Goddamn. So much. Anyways, thank you for coming to my TEDTalk

I’m not gonna act like I’m perfect and that I’ve never made mistakes or sometimes said hurtful things when upset (who hasn’t though) but I’m tired of being treated like the villain in a situation where I’m the victim and I’m tired of any way i try to defend myself or when I’m just trying to get answers is seen as me having a “BPD meltdown” or “lashing out.”

I have every right to be hurt and angry and sad but I think I’m handling it pretty well regardless??? And I wouldn’t need to constantly defend myself or speak about how hurt I am or any of that if this dickhead had just properly communicated with me in the first place or at the very least didn’t try to paint me as some dangerous crazy person for something that wasn’t my fault and like even if it hadn’t been about me fainting and was about me being depressed/suicidal, once again I was the only one hurting there no one else was getting hurt it doesn’t make me dangerous you ableist fucks and if it was such an issue why did he assure me everything was fine? He blatantly lied to me and so did his girlfriend and I don’t know at this point what was true and what isn’t true and it’s honestly disgusting that she thinks I’m the problem and has been using my BPD as a way to demonize me.

This was all because of her coward boyfriends inability to communicate like a mature adult. But I didn’t even fucking do anything I’ve been trying to move on. All that happened is last night after I finally had felt okay and strong enough to hang out in the food court which I haven’t been able to do cuz I feel like I’m being watched. But then after I came out of the bathroom his girlfriend was sitting outside, she didn’t see me right away and I wanted to say hi but I didn’t cuz of what she’d said a few weeks ago about him not wanting her talking to me and as dumb as it is I wanted to respect that, I went and sat away from her and went back to my music or whatever I was doing.

But then when she did see me she walked away without saying anything. That hurt a lot but what hurts worse is he eventually came out and saw me and walked past me too without saying something, and his girlfriend intentionally parked the car right by where I was sitting so I had to see him get in the car, I tried leaving after this I was gonna go to the grocery store but when I was walking there suddenly he was driving and he was stopped in front of me and he looked at me again and so I turned and went the other way but he ended up parking in a random parking spot by where I was walking and got out of the car for no reason seemingly just to make sure I saw him then when I kept walking he got back in like I feel like he was trying to torture me on purpose. Like who tf does this?

Maybe I’m being paranoid and I know they would deny doing this but it just all felt very intentional. I can’t believe I ever called these people my friends. No matter how many problems I have I wouldn’t have ever done something like this to them. Sometimes I wonder if this is karma for my past mistakes cuz I have said and done a lot of things I regret. I’ve always tried to make things right and apologize and correct my behavior but maybe to the universe that isn’t good enough.

But even then even though it’s not an excuse most things I’ve said or done that have been wrong usually happened when I was hurt first by whoever it was or I saw them treating someone else poorly and that doesn’t make it okay obviously and it’s not an excuse but im just saying I’m not a vindictive person or vicious person purposely out to get people or harm people.

Most of the examples I can think of were several years ago anyway before I even knew these people. And usually if anything I may say something bitchy or mean after being provoked or backed into a corner (usually to my mom more than anyone) but like these people are acting like I was a threat to their safety… I am not this dangerous crazy person they’re making me out to be.

I cared so deeply for them I would have done anything for them and it makes me sick that I could care so much for people that could just so easily hurt me then move on like it’s nothing. I think the differences between me and them is that if I say or do something wrong whether I realizes it at the time or realizes it later I always feel deep regret and always always apologize and try to make it right. Whereas they are blaming me and making it seem like my justified hurt is irrational. Well her and not him because he still hasn’t said a damn word to me. Coward. God just the thought of him makes me sick. I can’t believe I used to think he was the sweetest guy I’d ever met. And that I used to think he was the one guy to treat me with respect despite seeing me at my worst (about 6 years ago) and even recently before all of this he wasn’t treating me any differently everything was fucking fine that’s why I don’t fucking understand!!! And like the fact that he knows too how scared I was of getting hurt and losing people….asshole. He knows I felt so much pain which I was why I went to the hospital which he was so supportive and sweet about but now I’m in worse pain than I was then and he’s nowhere to be found. But that’s the thing I never needed or wanted emotional support from him. I just enjoyed talking to him about books and music. It’s all just so fucked and in sick of it all

Chilling Adventures of Sabrina

inspired by @thecourtofthedamned​ - feel free to edit or change pronouns for rp purposes

A threat to one of us is a threat to us both." 

"Here we go again."

We don’t need a reason to torment mortal boys.” 

"Let's go to Hell and get my boyfriend back."

"Claim the throne." 

Penny dreadful for your thoughts, cousin?”

"If you want the crown, you're going to have to prove yourself worthy of it." 

You wouldn’t hurt a fly. That’s why I love you.”

There’s nothing we can’t handle. As long as we’re being honest with each other.”

Had to fight off a giant squid for it, but anything for you.”

I just… I wanna forget, whoever or whatever that was… and just be here… with you right now. Is that okay?”

Because I love you, and I trust you to do the right thing, and to tell me the truth. In fact, I trust you more than I do anyone else right now.

I love you. I’ll always love you.

There’s no flying in my life without you,”

Of course not. Take us to the children.”

I never really thought of you as a cat person, but… okay.”

He hasn’t defiled you, has he?” 

You’re suggesting a witch hunt? “

My grimoire is your grimoire.”

If you say another thing about my mother or father to anyone ever again… I’ll choke you to death on your own blood.” 

You can’t keep killing me. “

Aunties! We have a big problem! “

Oh. I was right. That is a blood curse. Oh, it’s lingering. So, untreated, that is gonna eat slowly away at your health, your will, and your sanity.”

Well, um, who doesn’t enjoy a good scare every now and again?”

"I can choose to be afraid of my powers, or I can use them." 

"Hell's under new management now."

You’re a rebel. That’s how I like my witches.”

"Embrace your destiny." 

Alright then. Get me a bit of her hair and I’ll make all her teeth fall out.

"This is uncharted territory." 

"It can't be all Hell all the time."

"Being queen of Hell isn't a summer job." 

"Resurrection of witches."

The power to warp reality itself." 

"That's my girl." 

"In the town of Greendale, where it always feels like Halloween..."

"Honestly, first purgatory, now Hell. What's next? Heaven?"

"I feel I must warn you, this is who I am." 

A witch’s dark baptism is our most sacred unholy sacrament.”

Who’s talking about witches? Give me their names and I’ll make sure they stop talking about anything. Permanently. It’s just terrible when teenagers slip into comas, isn’t it?”

Satan in hell, what am I wearing?”

So he tricked my father and used my mother? And now he expects me to fall in line? Well, I say not today, Satan.”

Ghastly water. Basically water you get from wiping down corpses.”

Mephistopheles save us from the melodramatics of a teenage witch.”

If you could get past security by yourself, and that’s a big if, you’d never be able to find your way around. It’s like a maze down there.”

A map? To what? This isn’t The Goonies.” 

Could you draw me a map? “

to be clear, I have a boyfriend.”

Word travels fast amongst the damned, it seems.”

All contact sports. Then, it’s the movies and Chinese food.”

We’re talking about murder here!”

Ritual sacrifice. It’s slightly different.”

Great! So I’m supposed to spoil the girl who harrowed me.

Preferably with figs and wild berries to sweeten her meat before the feast.”

Oh, come on, cuz. It is a little funny – Prudence getting her just desserts by literally becoming the dessert.

Boys. Lots and lots of mortal boys. To torment. And seduce. Or both. “

Maybe you’ll find the meaning of life at the highschool.”

Oh, you had me at boys to torment.”

sleep like the dead.”

I like the ghosts in it.”

Well, Christmas is the best time for ghost stories.”

Seriously, what is it with witches and cannibalism?”

Everything. I mean, we’re not even officially boyfriend and girlfriend, and yet tomorrow, we have to take part in some crazy bacchanal.”

Well, if it makes you feel any better, I’m terrified.”

Yeah, right. I caught you in the attic with my cousin having an orgy.”

I’d like to lodge a formal complaint”

He sent me to help you get ready for the ball, like a satanic fairy godmother, I suppose.”

Call me daddy.”

How’d your reformation go over?

You know, shockingly, the kings of hell didn’t embrace my ideas with the gusto I was hoping for.

Ooh, blimey, what would I wear? “

I’m a hobgoblin.”

That is not how public school works.”

You knew? You knew the entire time and you didn’t say a word?”

Earlier, I was an ass. I freaked out, which is okay, but I should have said, “I love you, and I’m here for you, all of you, witch, Sentinel, co-president.”

Let’s say… I wanna be at your side, on the right side of history.” 

 Puritanical masculinity? And principal Hawthorne is the most intolerant, the most buffoonish, the most misogynist of all.”

But I want both. I want freedom and power. “

He’s a man, isn’t he?”

No one should get to decide what we can and can’t read.

bruh it never fucking ends with tina

me: ur going somewhere today? 👀 interesting interesting,,, would there be room for 1 more? /playful

her: ugh, im taking your sister to school and shes already ready to go. actually shes later than she normally is. i have other things to do. /annoyed

me: thats fine i can be ready in 10 minutes? /neutral

her: okay well shes already late so. /annoyed

me: [setting this boundary cant end well but i havent tried in a while...] thats fine, but maybe next time be more direct with me and just tell me what you mean? when youre passive aggressive to me it hurts my feelings and is also sort of conveluded. its clear you dont want me to come but i'd rather you just be like "hey i dont think its a good idea if you come this time, maybe next time"? /neutral, trying to have a positive tone cuz i know even a hint of something negative or critical sends her

her: UGH, LOOK, it was my INITIAL REACTION. IM SO SORRY. you have initial reactions too. ITS NOT LIKE I CAN HELP IT. PASSIVE AGGRESSION WASNT MY INTENT. SO SORRY. /very passive aggressive, acting like im over-reacting, angry, sarcastic

every single interaction with her is like this. every single one. and i fucking live with her. she holds the ideology that "nobody's perfect and i'm with flaw, but my flaws make me quirky and loveable" meanwhile her flaws are being a helicopter-parent who's over-controlling, literally a highschool bully, triggers her trauma-ridden kids on purpose, etc. no matter how calm or positive or adult i try to talk to her, she just gets angry with me and tells me our relationship is normal because ALL parents bully and traumatize their kids but that i need to grow up and learn to live with it. she views me as a perpetual child and wont stop shaming me for decisions she views as being impulsive, even if theyre not. on top of this she has a chronic victim complex, and thinks that when i was 12 i suddenly decided to hate her for no reason cuz i thought it was fun? i guess? for my entire life she's blamed me, solely, as the reason we live in poverty and by extension that i am the reason for her (and our whole family's) unhappiness, meanwhile, she has a spending problem and prioritizes her 100$/week cereal and wine.

sorry for the vent i just. its gotten worse over the last year. i really dont know how much more patience i have with her. i try so hard to be kind or at least passive and adult, but she's like this (or worse) all the time every single day. nothing changes.

We do recall what happened that night at Bates college and the name is Bates for bait and they're talking about Hera and the capsule with Allison Hazel and that's who Becca is and she's really not that small she's shrunken down and she was teeny and it was distressing her and you are not really huge so you didn't think anything of it and it motivated Hera not on purpose but she was doing it then too and it's because of Dave and he's she's trying to have a child and to work and thought your DNA is more mutated no but you look like them so she thought she'd do that and his friend was jealous and he's bigger and nobody noticed and he said try reading the code that'll take care of the problem and no so he tried reading the code and yeah he got in trouble you go who am I in trouble with Brad to set the museum of science Boston in the space capsule and you said the Max and he said oh no is it someone had to read it and it'll help me and you and her and it's really nonsense no it's very very bad and he said what the hell does that mean I only talk about someone else and me so think about it . And this is later they have this museum with people in their plasticized or something and it's gross and he said oh no and he figured it out and he got in trouble and it is that analogy to Hera in the year to land on Venus and she's to come find you to get you in shelter and for crying out loud they want to do that to you to find her and it's the max and they want to do that when you went to Utah things are going to change over there Utah is a complete disaster and that's why we're bringing it up that's why the story about bates. And Dana Hazel is really brad he was real small too. And you told bja and he went out as David Bowie in the look and he said to Brad he said you're my son and I want you to look at me he's looking at he says what should I see then he got it remembered and he said I'm going to tell people without getting hurt he says he tell people so you don't get hurt cuz they know you already know. said you tell people in a certain way. So he heard it might start competition and all of a sudden he said this is a good idea he told other people and they're competing over the capsule and it's still going on but it's really the max idea and the max are upset it's like the cars they're having a problem but not as it's a little different but really it is about that capsule and this code with the name of it and the number and all sorts of things and George went nuts on it and people started looking at it and said no way and this little girl's heart's broken but that's what it is and she said wow that's intense and mom was upset and said how old are you to figure that out it was 55 his retirement in Florida and social she says that's great so yeah everybody's figured it out in 23 and it's different than what you think finally and she goes uh oh. Finally she said I sort of get this and she started working right now she's not upset with what happened because she sees what's going on and says this is impossible I was never going to make it there's a ton of max out there in Utah so we're going to publish this is very important

Zig Zag

I hear this he just came out of the basement like that movie with a big red laser and the popcorn in the house it's not amazingly funny it's hilarious

Thor it's because it's true Freya

I hear I'm saying to my Father who the heck is that as he doesn't have too many words but he does a lot of stuff and my Mother is laughing and giggling and it's a lot of fun

Hera

And that was a movie where the guy hit the laser and it became popcorn and I said it again and I can hear him saying why again a few times and it's him and the guy was doing the calculations to hit the house and it was to mess up this guy in his Trump and everybody does this weird stuff to him cuz he's turned into a nutcase but he won't stop doing this crazy things to people

Zig so what what are you talking about the guy coming up out of the staircase is doing weird things to Trump Zag that's how it is in our family but I tell you what I'm thinking about because we're talking about lasers and hot ones and how the cooking things and the guy is trying to cook colonels and it may have been Trump who messed up the pseudo empire and they're using the old fashioned 747 with the laser and it doesn't do much to him and the house fills with popcorn so I was saying it's a sponge but they're really trying to hit the guy and it didn't work Zag it sure looks like Justin too when we think he does Forrest Gump afterwards Zag we think they lose a ton of stuff and it's because of the blockade and they're fighting the warlock and they lose it to the empire and both sides do and the foreigners have to start working and they see what's down there now Zig

Yeah I have to dress up a little as retarded people it's very difficult same thing heavily medicated

Shaq

Olympus

The Feeling of Heartache/Momentum

I am an absolute mess...

My first breakup was extremely difficult, But at least that was able to force myself to forget about the person. Same with the third.

This one just hurts in a whole new way.

If I'm too quite this to physical pain, I'd say the first two felt like serious stabbings (The first one involving a lot of twisting), and this just feels like I'm being melted. Lowered into a thing of acid and I can't even scream...

Part of me wants to say that, If I had seen this coming several months ago, I would have cut it off then and there... But knowing me I don't think I could have.

Cuz you know I think I've realized that, somewhere along the line, I taught myself that My main purpose in life is to make others happy... and while that's certainly something I wish to do, It's always come at the expense of my own well-being.

So after my first relationship I kept seeking out other people in an attempt to do that... At least that's what I assume.

And please do not misunderstand me, some of the people I was with, these two especially, they were the greatest people to have ever come into my life. Certainly the most impactful.

Also I just want to say quickly, for any of the people who would like to claim that I'm being dramatic, I encouraged you to imagine something/someone that you've poured your heart and soul into. Something/someone that you've grown accustomed to thinking of a particular way, treating a particular way, building a routine around that person/thing.

Then imagine, after a few years have gone by, and all of a sudden - You're no longer allowed to think of or interact with that person/thing the way you've learned to. Yes they're still there, but now it feels like there's a thick, emotional barrier between the two of you...

I don't know if that's even remotely close to how either of them feel, but until I hear otherwise from them, that's what I have to assume to keep the friendship going.

I could go on about the other reasons that make this harder for me, but I think that more than enough covers what I need it to.

I told myself when this relationship started that, if it somehow managed to not work out, I could never bring myself to date again... I was so confident that this was the right one. "I could make this last forever, this is the relationship I want to work on!"

...but after several failed attempts at improving, and a few broken hearts, I was proven wrong.

But see, there-in lies the problem - she's polyamorous... Despite knowing for an absolute fact that I was not, I was convinced it wouldn't be that big of a deal. I would be completely fine with dating her while she dates other people as well.

On paper there's absolutely no problem with that, but having an in practice is an entirely different beast...

Once we got comfortable and she started looking into finding other partners, it's like all of my worst traits were fucking magnified. My jealousy, my insecurities, my fears of rejection and abandonment, I became possessive and controlling it was... It was gross and I just couldn't stop.

And I wasn't doing this to be cruel to her, or anything nasty like that. I kept pushing because I wholeheartedly believed that this was all just a me problem and that, If I just worked hard enough, I'd be able to get through it and we could live a happy wonderful life.

But I was wrong... I was wrong and I let things get out of control. After several months, she decided enough was enough... and it kills me that I couldn't bring myself to realize it first.

It's terrifying how blind I can be to my own actions, even when I'm confident that I know what I'm doing.

And yet, despite all the shit I've put her and everyone else through, somehow she still wants to be my friend. They both do... And I just can't help but wonder if I even deserve this.

I genuinely don't feel like I offer anything as a person, nothing useful or valuable anyway. Lately I haven't been able to think of myself as anything other than a burden, and this was well before she decided to call it off.

No matter how hard I try, I can't find the will to challenge myself anymore... So much so that I even fight it. I used to be such a bright, beautiful, and happy soul... and then I let the world destroy it, burn it, tear it, and throw it in the mud.

I'm so incredibly tired of my own shit, and at the same time I want to learn how to love myself God damn it...

With some much needed guidance, I am taking steps to actually better myself.

These several months I've been talking about it, But I never really made any substantial progress... Probably because I was forcing myself into a relationship that wasn't healthy... But whatever.

I am terrified of myself, angry at so much for the world around me, and hopeless about my possible future...

But two nights ago I decided "fuck that". Starting from here I will make these changes, and one of those changes was to simply find a new therapist... However in the process I realized that I also needed to check myself into a mental hospital...

From there I got even more help that I so desperately needed... I just hope I will continue to find the strength to keep this momentum going.

Honestly I could go on for hours about this but I think I'll leave it here.

For anyone who bothered to read this, thank you, and I hope it didn't make you too depressed lol

Y'all have a good day~✨💕🌸

the gaang + how well they would do on the infinity train?

this is suuuper hard because there are so many factors to take into consideration. first is obviously the train itself. the train's function in a metanarrative sense is to serve as a vehicle for storytelling, dissecting & deconstructing the process of a narrative and how a character's arc is propelled by their circumstances. the train supposedly functions to improve its passengers, and yet we also know that The Train is a deeply flawed mechanism that can corrupt and further traumatize its passengers just as much as it can "fix" them. when the train invites you in with the single-minded goal of getting your number to zero, assuming you ever disembark, you're probably gonna be left with even more trauma than when you arrived, or at the very least, weirder trauma.

grace wanted to be seen, but instead of learning to value herself for her own intrinsic worth instead of relying on validation from those around her, she was enabled by that validation and literally started a cult. likewise, since jet is basically a less heinous version of simon, i see him taking a similar path to the apex (though he would of course name them the freedom fighters) trying to overthrow the tyrannical one-one and reinstate the True Conductor. he would think his path is righteous. he would think he is protecting those kids from evil. who knows what would happen once he learns the truth.

then there is the matter of what the train wants from you. the train arrives at a pivotal moment in one's life, when they are at an emotional crossroads and need a catalyst for growth. for example, jesse's problem was relatively small (because he is perfect) but hurting his brother caused him emotional turmoil nonetheless, so the train stepped in. this means that to answer this question properly, i would have to answer not only when the train arrives for them, but why, and seeing that every single atla character carries massive amounts of baggage (most of it flavors of trauma that infinity train has not addressed), this proves extremely difficult. i have to identify the most narratively satisfying moment in each character's lives to have the train arrive, and then i have to make assumptions about which cars would propel them which way (emotionally). you're asking me to outline nine different fanfictions.

only jet's character feels similar enough to any of the characters we've seen in infinity train for me to even have an inkling as to what path he would take. while sokka and tulip are quite similar as people (rational, scientific yet creative thinkers who over-rely on logic over feeling, are deeply loyal, and instinctually blame themselves for the problems caused by others), their character arcs themselves have little in common. both aang and hazel experience a tragic loss of pure, childhood innocence (which is why i cry over both of them every day), but in relatively dissimilar ways (at least appa gets to return to aang). min-gi and zuko are both pressured by their upbringings to conform to a standard that makes them miserable to please their parents, only to ultimately embrace their own passion & truth... but not only do those arcs play out completely differently, zuko and min-gi are completely different people, and if anything, zuko's approach to life is far more like ryan's (ie, jumping off a cliff and hoping he lands on his feet).

but what i think you're really asking, at the end of the day, is how emotionally mature, self-aware, and capable of positive growth is each atla character? because how am i supposed to know what the train would do to their psyches, considering each external situation would shape them differently, and unless i'm supposed to meticulously craft fanfiction for each one of them (which i wouldn't be opposed to doing, but only for one character, i simply cannot do all nine – also, i'm surprised infinity train AUs aren't more common, but then again i'm not particularly familiar with fanficition, so maybe it is!), it would only be an approximation, in which i identify their core problem (which again, is not how real people work, or even how atla characters work, but how The Train works) and then analyze how long it would take for each of them to solve said problem.

so, that was a very long-winded preface. without further ado:

aang's main problem is that he keeps running away from his problems, which is to say, distracting himself from the enormity of his grief. personally, i would say his coping mechanism isn't the worst. after all, he experiences so much world-shattering pain in such a short span of time, and he does deserve to preserve his childhood and his innocence for as long as possible. but, for the purposes of the narrative, the train must necessarily disagree. he must confront his grief head-on, without distracting himself from it or flying into a destructive rage that he'd only regret later. it also depends on who his companions are. with katara by his side, he can get through anything (and vice versa), but it's unclear who will be there to guide him through his pain. that said, i know he'd make it through okay. he's aang. he has to.

katara lives in a fairytale. like i said with aang, that's not really a bad thing. she's a great kid with big dreams and a big heart. she wants to save the world, and – guess what! – she does. but living in a storybook strips one's worldview of the nuances of life, not simply the harsh realities of the world, but also the full extent of one's personhood, outside of simply the black and white worldview of heroes and villains. katara's apotheosis is when she confronts yon rha, looks him in the eyes, and sees a human being staring back at her, another human being. she is no longer in a revenge tale. she is out of stories to tell herself. (life doesn't make narrative sense.) ironically, the train is a metaphor for storytelling, so katara coming to realize that she isn't in a story would both be confusingly meta and also fucking brilliant (if i do say so, personally). i don't know how exactly it would play out, but by god i would pay to see it.

in many ways, sokka is remarkably open-minded, and in many ways, sokka is extremely stubborn. i think he'd come to terms with his own emotional growth (which would be rooted in learning his own self-worth) faster than he'd come to terms with the train itself. "okay, fine, yeah, i deserve love regardless of what i can do for other people, but WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS PLACE?!?!?" his journey through the train is actually everyone else's dream experience on the train. passengers and denizens alike keep falling in love with him (or at the very least, admiring him more than they've ever admired anyone they've ever met), but he doesn't even notice because he's too busy being extremely suspicious of everything he comes into contact with. yes, he'll solve your problems and puzzles and help people and make meaningful connections and eventually he might start to realize that he is worth something even when he's alone, even (especially) when he's being unconventional or "weird" or "selfish." but even once he does get his door, does he walk through it? oh no, he takes it apart and tries to figure out how it just created a fucking portal. so while he would technically "do" quite well, he is never leaving that fucking train. rip sokka.

well, toph needs to learn to accept and embrace her own vulnerability. she definitely goes through that same crystal karaoke car tulip did. that, or the train just tortures her by putting her in increasingly more painful situations in which she must ask for help. but that's too awful to even think about, so i'm just gonna say she has to sing karaoke.

zuko needs to learn to trust his instincts and his own internal moral compass instead of the external pressures being forced upon him by his Father (capital F to emphasize that his nation & his father – aka the patriarchy – are one & the same for him, lmao). and he would fail. a lot. but eventually he would realize that his number goes down when he lets himself be himself, and he would leave the train happy. he probably also gets a bunch of cute little talking animal companions to guide him through. he deserves it.

the train appears to suki while she's having a breakdown in solitary confinement at the boiling rock. she finds healthy ways to cope with being put through hell while on the train, and by the time she gets off, she's being let out of solitary. it is a very rewarding experience, and one that she can swear wasn't just some hallucination. she's constantly telling herself yes, of course it was just a hallucination.... but still... it felt so real....

if i had to diagnose azula with one singular problem that plagues her at the core of her very being, it would have to be her fear of rejection. but it's not good enough to just keep having train cars reject azula, she has to accept that rejection, instead of just intimidating people into submission after the fact. she needs to understand why she is being rejected, and be fine with it, and learn from it, instead of letting her lack of universal perfection in every area anyone could ever excel in shake her to her very core. when ty lee proved that she secured the affections of dumb stupid boys better than azula ever could, she did an arson to cope (which of course is still very valid of her uwu). azula needs to learn to come in second place, third place, even last place, and shrug it off, think to herself, "hopefully i'll do better next time, and if not, that's okay also," and once that happens, everything else will fall into place. though maybe she could read bell hooks or smth at some point on the train cuz i think that could help too.

mai needs to stop being so goddamn depressed all the time. has she tried lexapro, or perhaps using a lightbox in winter? her favorite coping mechanism, knives, only helps her feel something some of the time, but most (if not all) of the time she's still being expected to play a part. has she tried, like, being herself? i heard from zuko (you know, the guy? from the train?) that "being yourself" works wonders. so the train gives her that opportunity. and she actually even enjoys herself for once in her miserable fucking life.

omg there must've been some sort of mistake ty lee was totally sent here by accident because she's actually super happy all the time and doesn't have any problems!!!!!!!! jk, can u even imagine? ty lee hates her life too, she just doesn't go around advertising it like mai does with her big dyke boots and depressing eyeliner. but apparently she also needs to learn how to "be herself," whatever that means. as if life isn't a constant performance, you know, like jacques said or whatever. she sees mai on the train. she rolls her big beautiful brown eyes. "oh god, not you too."

ROTT Review

SPOILERS FOR THE MOVIE. You have been warned.

FYI: I just finished the movie. So my opinions may change a bit but here I am writing a full review.

Before I talk about the movie, I have to say this movie has fantastic animation. The music is as good as usual.

Ok now the story. Let’s start with the our Trollhunters.

Fair Lady Claire. My girlie Claire really brought her all into this. I’m really proud of the young woman she has grown up into. However for the sake of the plot and story they make her run out of magic juice quite a bit. But my girl is still the best and gives it her all.

Wingman Domzalski. I will be perfectly honest. Toby is kind of the annoying best friend at times and bothers me as a plus size person. (They really push the over eating thing to the point that it’s his biggest factor.) Toby is a very eager kid who is ready to get in the action. Never being negative to his friend but the best emotional support who will always be at his side. Sure Toby was used a bit as comedic relief in the movie but when push comes to shove, Toby will always be there to do the right thing.

Blinky is amazing as always. One of the best father figures out there.

Aarrrgh was there. Was great for the scenes he was in, but all together didn’t do much that altered the story.

Our Trollhunter, Jim Lake Jr. Someone I admire and basically see as my little brother/child. Kiddo really did it. I know everyone is upset that Jim’s arc was redone when we had the “Unbecoming” episode. If I could come to a peaceful middle ground, I saw we all need to blame Merlin. He really rocked Jim’s world and self worth. When the creator of the object you need to save the world with tells you “You’re not enough”, it really can be a great setback. But once we past that, Jim really pulled through. Amulet or not, he is our Trollhunter.

Mommy Dr. Lake was there. Barbara was mostly there for our emotions.

Dilf Strickler. I felt that he was changed a bit since we last saw him, but he had a new purpose. He was more cautious and happy because he had a chance at a happy life with Barbara. Which makes what happens to him more upsetting. 

Nomura my sweet. This movie did not deserve you. At least she was with Draal.

And Not-Enrique (seriously why didn’t they ever give him an actual name) just wasn’t in the movie.

How about some CreepSlayers?

BABY ELI PEPPERJACK CAME BACK LOOKING SO CUTE. So proud.

Bumbling knight oaf Steve the Palchuckian was great as usual.

I will say though. The whole pregnancy plot was just a way to get Eli and Steve out of the way. I could feel that the writers maybe didn’t like Steve so much since Wizards. But Steve was once again someone to laugh at. Pregnant and out of the way.

How about some Akiridions?

Aja my darling girl, oh how you’ve grown. I understand some think she has changed. However I must say that her preparing a plan B on the side was smart. She isn’t just a princess on earth anymore. She is a queen on a distant planet. So if she thought evacuation was best, it would ensure that everyone would live. And avoid losing more valuable people from her life. So no, I can’t blame her.

DJ Kleb was there. He was kinda doin his own thing and messing with Steve. Brother-in-law stuff.

It was good to see Varvatos Vex.

Stu was the man in the background working on the busy important things like working on the amulet. Personally I feel like the series REALLY underutilizes Stu A LOT so I was so happy to see him being a part of something huge.

And finally some Wizards.

Douxie my love, you were amazing as usual. His powers have grown greatly and have contributed to the adventure. But god the writers really do love to take everything away from him don’t they. It’s unfair.

Archie was kinda just there and just... I understand leaving Douxie but that doesn’t mean I like it.

Nari the sweetest. I can only imagine the guilt she felt to end Nomura. Her self sacrifice was probably the one in the movie most called for.

Alright now I’ll talk about the movie.

I can whole heartedly say this movie was rushed. To be honest I feel like the original writers weren’t completely in this. At least it felt kind of not so much Trollhunters or 3Below vibes but more Wizards, if that makes sense whatsoever. Something is off.

I just want to blame Merlin for everything. To hell with that guy.

The beginning sequence was great. A car chase to a moving train. Which ends up with Toby of course screwing up and breaking the brakes. Of course. The train falling off the tracks which ultimately ends up with Nari gone. Oh yeah, and video recordings of Magic, trolls and being taken in by the police. Great.

WHY TF WAS TOBY TELLING THEIR STORY TO THE POLICE. YOU DON’T MIX THE POLICE IN STORIES UNLESS YOU KNOW THE COP PERSONALLY. CUZ IT’S A MESS AND THE POLICE GET IN THE WAY. GDI TOBY.

Our heroes go back to base on the new and improved Camelot. Where we discover that Barbara and Strickler are now engaged. Happy news and would secure that Jim has another Father figure in his life and his mother’s happiness. Which explains Strickler’s “stay behind” advice. Now he has a family to watch over. He must be careful and warns that Jim’s actions could cost so much that he might not be able to afford.

Enters our Majesty Aja and the new stud on the block, Eli. Dang I wish puberty hit me like that.Truck-kun strikes again. And also enters... the pregnancy thing. I will say, I didn’t mind it too much... at first. But there are complications. Steve is too young to be a father and dang 7 kisses?? I can’t help but feel like Aja should have mentioned that or it was a last minute plan to write out Steve and Eli. (Which it was.) It was funny sure cuz omegaverse and ALIENS but all together it’s really iffy.

They really had Douxie preform a body-swap spell only so it would be undone. And undoing the spell only hurt them both?? C’mon. C’mon.

And they mention the Krohnisfere. We’ll get back to it. Jim gets a brand new amulet infused with Akaridion tech. However theres an issue. It was created by Merlin right? Who is a wizard right? Who uses MAGIC. Shame Douxie wasn’t there to help make it. Ya know. 1/2 of the original creator of the AMULET. So it’s missing a huge part and for the sake of the plot, Jim doesn’t test the Amulet which is out of character personally.

Toby makes a silly big deal over a penny. I was actually hoping they would make it a silly Chekhov's gun later on. But no, it’s just Toby being loud and comedic relief.

The titans are released and we visit a very pregnant Steve. Ok so it’s a rushed kind of thing. ok.

Aja suggests evacuation. You can say it’s out of character but we need context. When Aja helped in the Doomsday Battle, she was ensured a way out but if she let the people of Arcadia perish. She decided to stay and help. But now the Trollhunter himself can’t help. So to ensure the survival of everyone, evacuation. A best chance for everyone to survive. Plus she is now a Queen. She rules over a whole planet which must change her thinking.

Now our characters are split into 3 teams:

Blinky, Archie, Archie’s dad and Claire for the Krohnisfere.

Jim, Aja, Toby, Strickler and Barbara for the Glacial Titan.

Nomura, Douxie and Aarrgh for the Earth Titan.

Now here is where I have problems. WHY. DID. THEY. SEND. TROLLS. TO. BRAZIL. IN. THE. DAY. Nomura dying was just so out of pocket. Unnecessary. I couldn’t even grieve properly I didn’t have a chance to process. The best thought I could think was “At least she’s with Draal now.” 10 seconds later, Strickler makes the choice to sacrifice himself. Because of Jim’s heroic’s, Strickler decided to try to save the most important people in his life. The person who was always dishonest finally had a chance to live a happy life with his family. The one who played it safe now had to make the final impulsive move. And unfortunately, his death was in vain. These deaths were just so forced. It wasn’t in any way good. And Strickler being one of the best written characters just going in such a way was just off. He died for nothing. He could have turned back and fought another battle but... no.

(BTW Barbara was just there... for Strickler’s death.)

We move to Babara and Jim having a heart to heart. I’m glad she didn’t blame Jim but a small moment of anger. Something a little more real for me but no I guess. Barbara will always just be Jim’s mom. She mention’s Jim’s father and it passed so quickly I missed it on my initial viewing. I’m happy that Jim’s father is never revealed or made a bigger part in his story. This is good representation for those of us who did have our fathers walk out on us. That we can grow despite our parents failing us.

And finally team Krohnisfere. Archie just leaves. He’s gone. Poor Douxie. A mentor and now his closest companion.

Our heroes meet up to go against the Volcanic Titan. In comes Varvatos Vex on a Gun Robot. Nice to see some good ol Gundam with a character mentioned throughout the entire trilogy. However it doesn’t last. BTW for the sake of survival, Aja leaves Jim and Toby. Iffy.

Douxie pulls a “Jason stop. This isn’t you.” thing with Nari and is reunited with his friend.(+ points for the shippers. It’s kinda winning me over?) Also, Claire now has the power to teleport a Titan. I know she’s much stronger than she was for the Trollhunters Sn 2 finale, but cmon. You can’t just say she’s out of magic juice and then pull this. C’mon.

(btw did the titan make a War of the Worlds tripod sound? No? Just me?)

Nari sacrifices herself and takes the other god with her. Which takes away Douxie’s other companion. Mr. Stark I don’t feel so good. Why does this movie hate Douxie so much. (I am so sorry shippers. Angst.)

BLINKY DIDN’T SEE A PAGE? ADDRESSING IT IN THE SHOW DOESN’T GIVE YOU A PASS. I forgot the word but this irony isn’t greatttt.

Jim now has to pull out the legendary sword Excalibur. But he can’t cuz he hasn’t harnessed the power of friendship.

And Steve is giving birth. At the worst time. What is this a zombie movie??? C’mon.

Jim says “Magic is friendship” And Stu is finally being used for one grand act. Seriously Stu is just so unappreciated. So he fixes the amulet with magic.

Basically everyone who went on top of the Volcanic titan falls off at some point. Except Jim cuz of course some 1v1. 

ONCE AGAIN Claire is out of magic juice. Because... reasons.

Toby makes the choice to race to Jim’s side with the technology to cancel out magic. (Wait how does science stop magic again)

BTW, For the Good of all doesn’t hit as well BUT it’s not mentioning any glory towards stinky Merlin so I am happy with the change.

JIM HAS A NEW TRANSFORMATION. MY BOY. MY SON. I’M SO PROUD.

Toby races to Jim and his helmet falls off the taco truck. That honestly should have been a huge warning sign. I was worried he didn’t have armor but we know how this goes.

Jim defeats the final titan and everyone is happy. The fight is finally over.

STEVE HAS 7 KIDS. OUCH. 

Seeing Jim run to Toby was heartbreaking. Now this is the one scene where the movie really let out actually process a character’s death. How on earth can you process your best friend, your most faithful companion dying. Jim goes through too much I swear to god.

Now let’s discuss the time travel plot. I honestly feel like they pulled some kind of Attack on Titan ending. The main character burdened with knowing the future and what could have been. And if everything is meant to be how it will be, destiny will reconnect them again. (Jlaire reincarnation AU???)

I’m actually ok with this ending. I understand people would want the time stone to return only a few minutes. But even then, the kiddos still have police records, so many people dead at the titan’s hands (or feet) and now the world knows about the existence of trolls thanks to the internet. In New York no less. And people are still dead.

We return the the beginning of everything, reflecting the “Unbecoming” episode.

(NGL I’m bothered that they didn’t do anything to stop Steve from bullying Eli, but Jim can’t do it. He’s saving it for Toby.)

And now finally, let’s discuss Toby becoming the Trollhunter. From the beginning, Toby never considered himself good enough to be the main star. Always the wingman, the 2nd best. Support. Now it was Toby’s turn to climb the ranks and be the Hero he’s always wanted to be. It’s Jim’s turn to live an easier high school life. I don’t doubt that he won’t follow Toby. But now he knows what to avoid and how to make the story process more smoothly.

I understand some are unsatisfied with this ending, which is kinda trademarked with Dreamwork’s shows. I get it. But honestly as of right now, I think I like the ending.

The amulet didn’t choose Jim because this Jim is not the same Jim as in Sn 1 Ep 1. He is a new man. And I think we all can agree that it’s his turn to be happy.

---

I still love this series so much. It is my favorite cartoon. Of course it has it’s flaws, but this ending is at least satisfactory and not heartbreaking. Now it’s up to us to either continue the story or contribute our ideas in fanfiction. I look forward to everyone’s creations.

Don’t think. Become.

( @nightless-stars ) Lana: Autumn Spear! *A holy spear of nowhere hits black ooze creatures as Welsh Fairy Mew from a book with one butterfly wing missing came out* Hey, you alright there? *Heals Toto wounds* What are those things?

[Lana used Autumn Spear! Its super effective! ] [The forest is lending its power!] strengthened by the battle field, the holy spear shoots directly though the creatures head. like a bullet though a watermelon it explodes into chunks as the spear passes through, the body collapses and melts into a heap on the grass. despite this, its kin doesn't seem to have any reaction to one of their own falling, only laughing.

toto gives the welsh mew a smile toto: thank you, im... fae wants to say something along the lines of "im okay" or "im alright" yet the lie refuses to leave her mouth. instead she turns faer head to the horse of strerrow getting closer, wanting to change the subject. "I- I have absolutely no fucking clue what those are! iv never seen anyone like them around here before!" the eevee considers her options, fae could attempt standing her ground, this wouldn't be anywhere close to the first time she’s been faced with a horde of foes who want her head.  ‘is that really a good idea though? if I get hurt everyone will be mad at me again for being stuipid’

toto: maybe you guys are right- I...im not strong enough to do this alone, its a lot safer to just run and let someone actually capable handle it- she changes her position, getting ready to bolt for the bushes. but the moment she does, a familiar voice rings out inside her mind

visions of the past scream inside faer head. echo’s of a past she ran away from

echoing and repeating. never letting her forget who she left behind in an act of selfishness.  ‘run away from your problems like you always do' they say ‘throw away everything we did for you’ they cry angry become you escaped. mad becuase you were to selfish to let them use you anymore “pathetic. pathetic. pathetic. pathetic. pathetic. pathetic.“  “selfish selfish selfish selfish selfish selfish selfish selfish“ their words repeat on loop. repeating and playing over themselves till its nothing more then an inaudible mess, yet the message refuses to blur itself. for the first time, the pain bubbles to the surface the eevee lets out a scream she’s been holding in for years

“SHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHUUUUUUUUUUTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA” fae claws at her head as tendrils appear from her back, spasming wildly around her as she screams.  theirs not even a second before her form changes, much larger, longer, much more dangerous a giratina

“I AM SO SO FUCKING SICK OF BEING WEAK. I GET TREATED LIKE A FUCKING TOY WHO CAN EASILY BE SCREAMED AT INTO SILENCE WHENEVER SHE DARES RAISE HER FUCKING VOICE. I LET PEPOLE FUCKING USE ME CUZ ITS APPERENTLY EVIL FOR ME TO SPEAK UP. WELL IM FUCKING D O N E. I DON’T CARE IF IT MAKES ME AN ASSHOLE IM DONE FEELING SORRY FOR ESCAPING AN ABUSIVE HOME” “IF YOU WANAN VILLANIZE ME FOR RUNNING AWAY, THEN I’LL STAY AND SHOW YOU ALL EXACTLY THE MONSTER YOU FUCKERS CREATED” she lets out another yell before descending onto the battle field. years worth of wrath is channeled as she throws around her opponents. she knows these arn’t the ones who hurt her, they don’t even know what she’s going on about. yet she can’t help herself, cuz she knows she’ll never be able to confront those who harmed her she can’t face them down no matter how hard she tries she’ll always be to weak. [seems like toto has temporarily lost herself to emotions and isen’t thinking clearly anymore] [it also appears that, you arn’t the only ones watching the battle]

stranger in the bushes: what the fuck what the fuck what the fuck what the fuck what the fuck what the fuck what the fuck what the fuck what the fuck what the fuck- WHAT THE FUUUUUUUUUCK 

stranger in the tree: hehehe, someones angry, this just got much more intresting~  [The two strangers are now available for asks] EDIT: changed my mind, they will be ask able soon but not yet (MOD NOTE: just for reference purposes- toto’s giritina form is only like, 6-7 feet tall, she’s no where near the size of a normal giritina lmfao, ALSO Y’ALL HAVE NO IDEA HOW LONG IV BEEN WAITING TO INTRODUCE THIS SLYVEON BITCH. I KNOW THE ART IS BAD BUT I WANTED TO GET THIS OUT OKAY) @nightless-stars​

Hi! We've literally never talked but I saw you were doing lost boys pairings with our descriptions and I can't help myself

So I'm mid-height straight female, and on paper I sound like your basic white girl. Blue eyes, blonde hair, kind of a redneck, but I'm also not. I've got dark blonde hair and it's kind of a mess but I like it. I enjoy wearing layers because it's comfy. I love denim, leather, and flannel, the works. I also love movie shirts and 80s sweaters. I don't wear much makeup because I honestly don't know where to start but I like that my eyes are both blue and green and I have freckles.

Personality wise I'm more of an introvert but kind of just because no one around me really wants to talk to me. The reason for this is a, people say I look grouchy 24/7, and b because when I do talk I infodump about my interests. People do enjoy me sometimes though because I'm hella sarcastic, but my parents hate it. So I'm not really awkward or anything I'm just way too afraid of embarrassing myself. Also I observe people cuz why not. So I honestly enjoy people who I share some interests but we can also just chill and be quiet.

Interests wise there is a lot. For one I love movies, especially 80s and 90s but of course old old movies are still cool. (But I will rant about the sexism in them for hours.) I also love to read especially classics, draw even though I don't think I can, and listen to music (also oldies.) Also just being outdoors by myself is pretty swag. Because the only other person is my dog and he won't judge me.

This is a lot I know... but of course take your time and this is so cool that you are doing this :')

Notes: I'm really sorry, I know i made you wait too long, but you know how life is. Let me tell you I enjoyed a lot writing your match-up. I hope you like it too, and remember you can give it positive or negative feedback, it helps upgrade my practice :)

After this sincere description, I am pairing you with...

David

He liked you after some nights of stalking you lol.

He saw you at the boardwalk, but unlike the other girls there, you were enjoying the time by yourself looking like someone run over your dog. That he found intriguing.

He also thought it was cute.

He observed, analyzed, then approached lmao.

How easily you talked with him about some of your favorite movies as if you've known him for years kinda shock him; he thought you were a quiet girl.

He doesn't really gets why your facial expression would repel people, he thinks you look beautiful and pretty normal, but he has gone through some individuals judging him without really getting to know him too, just because he looks rude. And he is, but he always says you shouldn't just assume.

David won't think you being sarcastic is a problem. I mean, it is when he is in the vamp-drama-queen mood and no one can be a brat but him, but generally, he finds it amusing. It is also a turn-on.

He likes your flexibility; knowing he can talk with you about trivial stuff for hours, or just enjoy a silent night together at the cave.

If you both are out and you are just sitting there watching the others, he joins you in this, of course adding some foolish observations and judging the other's outfits like a pretentious bitch. Do you know Regina George? Well, it is going to be like sitting with her.

When watching together those movies you love, he knows there's a lecture awaiting at the end of them, but enjoys listening to you express your disgust, and gets entertained by it. No doubt he is gonna make you more upset by deliberately making some nasty sexists and dark-humored jokes because he gets off with it.

David is kind of a loner too sometimes, therefore he gets you. So besides your (beautiful) doggo, David is now on that list of people that won't judge you. He is a jerk sometimes, but he will never do or say anything to hurt you purposely because he knows the most precious things in life never come twice, and when I tell you this man really loses himself when in love, I MEAN IT. He would love you more than anything or anyone, and he would tell you this someday. All the while he is gonna make you crazy with his bullshit, but nothing serious.

Also Nekrotefeyo was criminally underused for the legendary Eridian homeworld like I was expecting like a big abandoned city or a completely decimated apocalyptic place, not a dried up ocean bed (Are they maybe more crustaceans instead (?) of bugs???) with like 2 Eridian buildings on it and also Maliwan for... Some... Reason. Seriously. Dark Maliwan was so clearly cut content and I wanna know wtf that was all about. Also we got Promethea so it isn't like they weren't capable of making a big city area, like the restrictions of the engine wouldn't allow it, they just didn't... Feel like it? Maybe didn't have time to flesh it out given how late nekro is in the game? Seriously it feels empty as fuck, I love exploring the planets, but even as a certified lore lover I just can't bring myself to explore that place more than I have to for quests. It's really empty and boring

Also, I am bet that the big glowing thing we see coming out of the planet as it fragments is related either to the Machine and the souls sacrificed to make it work, or the Guardian soul main storage thingie. Mainly because ghosts and such are real in the bl universe and they're all that same glowing green sort of deal. It also reminds me of Krieg's mind planet projection thing which does add credence to that. That is potentially why Minos Prime 'hatched', it could have been a storage place for other, maybe reject(?) Guardian souls and that's where all the Eridian and Guardian stuff randomly came from that Tannis keeps goddamn repeating every time u play the takedown. FE Minos Prime was a testing site for prototype Guardians and the souls (I don't want to call them mind cores because the mind core we got from the Vault of the Destroyer was solid and not green and don't even get me STARTED on that whole situation because there was cut Overseer dialogue from when you take that thing out of the Vault and why WAS it even in the VAULT OF THE DESTROYER and Hhhhh) were stored in Minos Prime until whoops they got out. And I'm guessing they sacrificed the people of Minos Prime to the Machine (we literally left nobody guarding it sooo) bc Tannis says they just vanished without a trace. Which ALSO adds bonus points to my theory that the Eridians aren't dead and are just chilling elsewhere laughing at us right now.

I still think Lilith brought Elpis to the Eridian Rift on the map Typhon and Leda wrote all over and she's vibing there, too. Maybe it's a sort of stasis place where time doesn't pass so the people of Elpis don't die. Idk how Lilith would know about that but then again given the chest in her room I would honestly not bet against my whole 'Lilith had help from the Watcher and/or the Eridians during/before Bl3 and refused to tell us' which is why she just vanishes at the end of the game and takes Elpis with her.

And also why Sanctuary-III randomly exists when we have never heard of the company that made it before (seriously what is supamax mfg), it's somehow in good enough condition that Moxxi and Ellie could fix it up with their scarce resources, and they found it before any other people did (can probably chalk this one up to Tannis if there were cameras or it was hooked up to the ECHOnet of Pandora, but the other two points stand). I would've been okay with it if it were an Atlas ship Rhys sent over or smth, if it were an old Hyperion ship, if the branding of supamax mfg was Moxxi and Ellie's team effort of making a spaceship company in honor of Scooter- literally if any of these things were explained in-game, but they're NOT. So I am left to go 'what the hell where did this come from what is Supamax MFG' and like, a random company we've never heard of existing is totally fine, we're introduced to the Obsidian Black Block and Hephestus United as well, but it just feels weird that this random supply (?) ship just happened to go to Pandora for some reason and then also crash or was abandoned for some reason. If we could just get a scrap of info on Supamax MFG and why this ship was on Pandora I'd be happy. Their branding is Ships Made Quick so clearly they build ships which is fine.

Did Lilith contact them? If so, cool, could we get an ECHO log of that? Where did she get the money after Sanctuary-II blew tf up? Did she or Moxxi or Ellie have connections that allowed them to get the ship made for cheap or free? Why did they decide to make the ship out in the open when they knew about the rising CoV threat?? Was the ship stolen? Did the Crimson Raiders just kill a bunch of people to get their hands on it? I doubt it, but this shit isn't explained! So yeah when I write theories like 'Hm well maybe this ship was planted here by the Watcher' its not because I'm driven insane by the Eridians it is because we literally have no other reason to go 'maybe not' and with what little information we do get during the game, it could be fuckin possible!!!

Lilith apparently knew more than she was letting on, she was contacted personally by the Watcher during the end of TPS (brick specially had to ASK what the Watcher said to Lilith), so yeah fuck it the ship and everything that wasn't explicitly explained was given to Lilith by the Watcher to help her in her quest for whatever the Big One is in bl4. Bc you KNOW that Bl3 was just the lead up to get the Destroyer to slip out of its chains thru Tyreen's meddling (literally in nyriads log right before the final boss and its not like ty absorbed an entire planet sized monster and was the size of, like, a shortish tree so you know the Destroyer is still in there as it's further confirmed by Scourge when he says shit like you don't even know what you just did blah blah shut up loser- the only thing pointing to the Destroyer ACTUALLY being dead is that the Vault (????) of the Destroyer (???????????????) opened after Tyreen died but then we can make the Vault of the Architects argument that maybe it considered her part of the Destroyer and her dying confused the Vault into opened, iunno. I don't even know why that Vault was there in the first place wtf was its purpose I thought the Vault of the Destroyer was either the other Pandora one (emergency human feeding port to a monster that doesn't need sustenance) or literally Pandora itself in which case killing Tyreen should have destroyed the whole planet by opening it soooooo I guess that Vault exists to circumvent that extremely specific problem only the Eridians would have guessed could happen idk) and to set the Guardians up as villains cuz fuck them that's why (>:( please gearbox don't, make the Eridians the bad guys if someone has to be evil pretty please the Guardians aren't the bad guys they are literally gaining sentience right now give them a chance they gotta figure themselves out and the Eridians fit the whole 'corporations exploiting their workers' vibe with the Guardians being forced to work even after the Eridians are gone so don't let those parallels slip away with shortsighted storytelling) but then it hurts even worse cuz the story could've been so much simpler and just... Sweeter and better than what we got if that's all they had to do was set those two things up. Bro I hate how every time I go to ask questions abt the game it leads me back here. Because it's true!! And it hurts I just wanna sit down with the lore manager of the game and ask them all these questions because I'm genuinely curious, but I'm afraid of the answers or non-answers I'll get. Again, I get the whole 'things have to happen for plot, not everything should be questioned, give the writers some slack to write a story' argument but when EVERYTHING falls under that category and the story didn't even end up being that great, it gets really frustrating because HONESTLY? if we had gotten good lore and explanations to things and actual world building and details and all that? I wouldn't have minded the main story so much. But unfortunately we got neither good lore (I wanna tell Nyriad she was lied to very badly because it's either the Eridians are evil and liars about a lot, or nobody thought twice the implications of giving the Destroyer a feeding port that explicitly calls humans to it) nor good main story (you know.) and it just. Is annoying. That's all.

Survey #384

“watch your tongue or have it cut from your head”

Do you post to say happy birthday on other people’s walls? Sometimes. Depends on my mood and the person. When was the last time you saw a rainbow? Idr. What’s your favorite television commercial? I don't watch TV enough at all to have one. And who has a favorite commercial, anyway? Do you trip a lot? I don't really trip a lot, but kinda fumble over my footing and stray a bit. I'm horrible at walking straight, and it's gotten worse as my legs have. How old is your television? The one in the living room is god knows how old. My parents were still together when they bought it. When did you last talk on the phone with someone? A couple days ago for my appointment with my psychiatrist. Are you currently sleepy? I'm quite convinced I'm permanently tired. Are you hot or cold natured? I am ALWAYS fucking hot, ugh. Do you take any advanced classes? I took mostly Honors classes in school. Do you have weak upper body strength? My body is just weak as a whole. What is the worst insult someone can call you? Emotionally weak. Are you good at sketching? If we're talking meerkats, haha. They're the only complex thing that I can freehand no problem without needing a reference, honestly. Ever play Angry Birds? Nah. I thought the movie was cute, though. Have you ever been to the zoo before? Yeah. Has anyone ever been weirdly obsessed with you? No. Are you afraid someone might steal your identity someday? It's not something I actively worry about at all. Like, you don't want my identity, I promise. Do you have any talents that come naturally? Growing up, adults always told me I was a "gifted" artist and writer. Also that I seem to have an unnaturally strong connection with animals. I've always been that person where a pet's owner is like "omg ____ never lets people do that" and whatnot. Have you ever had plastic surgery before? I haven't. It's funny though, how opposed to it I used to be... Like goddamn, I was such a fucking stupid and honestly judgmental teenager, regarding many things. I look back on her and cringe. Like damn dude, if you have a safe surgical procedure to help you enjoy the body you're stuck with the rest of your life, you go for it, boo. Are you afraid of airplane rides? Not really. What’s the best Valentine’s Day gift you’ve gotten? There was this one year where Jason had to go to work on Valentine's Day and I was super bummed, yet he still surprised me with a heart-shaped box of chocolates, roses, and a game I really wanted, Heavy Rain. I thought it was the sweetest. What is something you lose often? My phone. ;-; Do you enter a lot of sweepstakes? I don't enter any. Do you consider yourself physically active? *chuckles nervously* Do you have Netflix? Yeah. Favorite salad dressing? That Olive Garden replica you can buy at the store. Do you enjoy dancing? Once upon a time I did. My body could never handle it now. Have you ever considered writing a novel? Many times. Snow or sand? Snow, by twenty thousand miles. It is VERY hard for me to walk through sand, and I also hate hate hate hate HATE the sensation. Do you like sour candy? Heeeeeell yeah man. Have you gotten any injuries lately? If so, what & how? Nothing notable. Are you a clumsy person? Like you would not fucking believe. Last male you talked to in person? I think my primary physician's nurse. Are you thinking about asking anyone out? No. Pink lemonade or regular lemonade? Pink lemonade, for sure. But I love both. Chocolate or strawberry milk? CHOCOLATE. Strawberry milk is disgusting. Have you ever won a contest on the radio?No. Is there a song that reminds you of your best friend? There's quite a few. Has a book ever made you cry? Yes. Do you automatically check your phone when you wake up? Yes, for the time. Do you know anyone who has a pet bunny? Not that I'm aware. What store or website would you most like a gift card for? Rebel's Market. How do you feel about wolves? I adore wolves. Beautiful, majestic creatures with very interesting social dynamics. Name your top 3 favorite musical instruments. Electric guitar, violin, piano. What was the last book(s) you bought at a bookstore? At an actual bookstore, I think it was The Fault In Our Stars, which I never actually read. Do you use Pinterest? Yes. Do you know any sign language? No. Do you have a favorite poem? No. Do you have a dog? No. The one we were pretty much stuck with has a home now. Have you ever read The Little House on the Prairie series? I haven't. Have you ever gone on a service trip to an underprivileged country? No. Have you ever performed in front of more than 100 people? Yes, for dance. When (if ever) was the last time you went to church? Forever ago, I don't even remember the last time. What's a quote you think is really powerful? There's a whole lot. The first one that came to mind was, "An eye for an eye will leave the world blind," which I do believe has great depth in it. Have you ever had to do your laundry at a laundromat? Yes. Are you the oldest person who lives in your household? No. My mom is turning 60 (... I think?) this year. If you have tattoos, how long have you had them? I got my first the day I turned 18. Do you and your dad have similar personalities? We're alike in some ways, imo most notably in that we have NO fucking common sense, embarrassing as that is to admit. We're both kinda slow at understanding things, too. What were the last three things you had to drink? Mountain Lightning, milk, and water. What did your family usually do for Easter when you were a kid? Us three kids all got Easter baskets full of stuff, and we'd go egg-hunting when we were all awake. My little sister Nicole would always wake our parents up in excitement, haha. My parents hid plenty throughout the house, and there was always this one "special" egg that was actually from Mom's childhood and was extremely intricate and beautiful. You basically "won" the hunt if you found it, and it was extremely well-hidden. When you have house guests over, where do they sleep? Historically since living here, my two half-sisters and their spouses (the only people who've stayed over) slept in what is *technically* Mom's room, but for whatever reason this woman still insists on sleeping on the couch in the living room, I guess because she's used to it after all the years she didn't have her own room and bed. Are you emotionally stable? LOLOOLOLOOLLOLOOLOOLOLLOOLOLLLLLLLLLLL Do you still talk to the very first person you had sex with? No. Are you an atheist? No. I don't quite know how to define what I am, but since I believe there's SOME higher power, I don't think it's fitting to call me an atheist. What’s the largest bug you’ve ever found in your house? Hm... I'm unsure. Probably a male mosquito, 'cuz them bitches are big'ins. Would it annoy you if a stranger called you "sweetie?" If it was a man, I'd be creeped out. Are you into fashion design? Not really. What’s the worst thing you’ve gone through in the past year? My leg muscles continuing to degrade, honestly. I have to do something about this shit. How did you get your last bruise? I fell when stepping over the stupid dog gate. Have your parents ever forgotten your birthday? Yikes, no. Would you rather have some bacon or beef jerky? Bacon. Do you like your orange juice with lots or no pulp? NONE. Do you wear skinny jeans? Back when I wore jeans, they were the only kind I wore. What projects are you doing now for school? I'm outta school. What’s the most number of comments you have on a Facebook picture? What is the picture of? I have no idea. Do you like coconut flavored things? No. Have you ever met a famous author before? No. Do you know anybody who has been raped before? No, thank god. I know someone who might've almost been, though. I don't know what the fucking pig was going to do to her if my sister and I weren't there. Have you ever wished for bigger boobs? No. Being overweight, I just want smaller ones now, haha. Have you ever gone a full day without interacting with another person? I've gone many days without it. How many relationships have you been in that lasted less than a year? Four, if you're counting everyone that had the "boyfriend" title. Where were you going the last time you were on a plane? Home from Illinois. Where were you going the last time you were on a train? I've never been on one. Have you ever been significantly more physically fit than you are now? Holy fuck, yes. You would never guess now that I was perfectly healthy in high school especially, yet I still thought I was kinda fat. It hurts so much to look back on. When growing up, did you parents keep the house very tidy? I mean not excessively, but Mom was pretty dedicated to keeping the house in decent condition. With three kids though, of course the house was somewhat messy with toys and all. When you shop at IKEA, do you always stop to eat a snack/meal in the cafeteria? ... There's a fucking cafeteria in a furniture store? o_o I've never been there before. How many watches do you own? None, save for one in my "treasure box" from when I was a kid. I was SO SO SO obsessed with Finding Nemo that I kept my broken one. I did the same with my horribly aged sneakers, like the soles were coming off and Mom finally made me stop wearing them, ha. Are there any ways in which you greatly differ from everyone else in your family? I do fucking nothing and am useless to society. Should teenagers be allowed to have their cell phones with them in class? Yes, because emergencies happen. I personally think it's best to maybe have your cell phone flipped over on the corner of your desk or something and on vibrate, that way the noise isn't too disruptive and the teacher can see you're not just using it for other purposes. Do you have any gay relatives? Yes. Have you ever had to have a pet put down? Sigh, multiple. Have you unfollowed, deleted, or blocked anyone on social media recently? If so, what was the reason? Not recently. How many cups of coffee do you typically drink per day? None. Do you know what your vocal range is? No, but it's not very broad. What’s the biggest financial mistake you’ve ever made? I haven't been in this position before. Have you ever been in a relationship where there was a large difference in maturity levels? No. What’s the longest you’ve ever stayed as a guest at someone’s house? I wanna say over a month while we were technically homeless. How bad was your acne when you were a teenager? Oh dear, it was rough. Like there were people who had it worse than me, but ya girl was lookin preeeetty rough lmao.

Balls To The Wall"

Too many slaves in this world

Die by torture and pain

Too many people do not see

They're killing themselves - going insane

Too many people do not know

Bondage is over the human race

They believe slaves always lose

And this fear keeps them down

Watch the damned (God bless ya)

They're gonna break their chains

You can't stop them (God bless ya)

They're coming to get you and then

You'll get your

Balls to the wall, man

Balls to the wall

You'll get your balls to the wall, man

Balls to the wall - balls to the wall

You may screw their brains

You may sacrifice them, too

You may mortify their flesh

You may rape them all

One day the tortured stand up

And revolt against the evil

They make you drink your blood

And tear yourself to pieces

You better watch the damned (God bless ya)

They're gonna break their chains

You can't stop them (God bless ya)

They're coming to get you and then

You'll get your

Balls to the wall, man

Balls to the wall

You'll get your balls to the wall, man

Balls to the wall - balls to the wall

Come on man, let's stand up all over the world

Let's plug a bomb in everyone's arse

If they don't keep us alive - we're gonna fight for the right

Build a wall with the bodies of the dead - and you're saved

Make the world scared - come on, show me the sign of victory

Sign of victory - sign of victory

You better watch the damned (God bless ya)

They're gonna break their chains (hey)

No, you can't stop them (God bless ya)

They're coming to get you

And then you'll get your

Balls to the wall, man

Balls to the wall

You'll get your balls to the wall, man

Balls to the wall

You'll get your balls to the wall, man

Balls to the wall

You'll get your balls to the wall, man

Balls to the wall

You'll get your balls to the wall, man

You stink John Cena Lord you had it you had the concept you had what to do and you said they're going to bomb everybody I can't stand you what you say is what's going on and stuff and you're a f****** moron see what do we do stick them up your ass that's what they say back funny whiny cuz everyone's blowing up of yours because you have a big huge mouth the city in his car jumping his apple juice out and he depends on it. Now we know what he's doing and you are suffering big time now you're going to die and you deserve to for what you did to me I still have a lot of problems from it it was a very bad accident I'm not walking around doing things to people and I'm actually convalescing because of you I have troops all around me to kill your assholes off keep trying to silence me from telling them what you're stupid. You are an a****** as Jerry senior you want that smart you made things for them that got her more hurt had ideas didn't do anything and they're old and a dumb he said to you ruined the jacuzzi broke it almost got to kill with their dumb ramp anything you disgusting you made a chairlift and broke her back then you said you did it on purpose to get her back for stuff she didn't do you're trying to aggravate the boy and he's killing you and I'll say he probably has a huge Force cuz you're stupid

Becka

I certainly am not going to listen to you John remillard no I hear you we're going to come get you for what you're saying you seem to him too in the sources are coming to get you and they say it and they show it it's just saving face man annihilating you and then do they wipe you people out fast second not even there just saying stuff they wipe you out they don't even listen. Not the one word that any of them are saying all of them talking they just wipe them out we're doing it now to yours soon you'll be out and do this stupid song and say the head of the rebellion we'll probably find out the diamond information here and just keep fighting each other to the death because of You John remillard I've never seen someone's act so weak in my life you are the cheesiest Satanist on Earth and you need to die and this is it this video is it you're out after this done you don't come back everyone's saying it too we're going to make sure you don't you're piece of Filth you're rude piece of crap you ruin people's lives and don't care you ruined Dolores akerleys secretly's life he just sat there saying it was good. No my life back and my wife that really hurt and it's a mess she's healing up and it's going to work but boy are you a dead man for your stupid comments afterwards for Christ's sake and your stupid shows all over the place mean that you're it means your dog s*** he's making all sorts of vehicles with all your people's cars they say that they grab them and they're inside when they melt them alive all of them they hate the living s*** out of you starting in with them and they're finishing it up this guy here's killed you a bunch of times nobody believes it I've killed you a bunch of times and you keep opening your mouth to us like you're somebody well like where ilioy and we're just sitting here nailing you

Brad

We're going after you now to free him up from you

Becka

// rant

i'm jus so heartbroken rn i've been crying for the past hour i jus need to put my feelings out there, i hope it's ok w you.

my mum wakes up today and jus starts berating me bc i didnt put washed dishes into the cabinets & the kitchen looked messy for her. i'm supposed to do it bc there's nothing else i actually do but yesterday i had woken up in the evening nd they called me to pray straight away so i totally forgot about it (coupled w the fact that i dont like doing it either cuz there's always sm dishes nd it's such a hassle). she jus started scolding me senseless nd im someone who doesnt get mad easily, even if i do i tend to stay quiet bc i dont like conflict & angry emotions are ugly. but i couldnt stop it today? she kept calling me selfish nd she's been calling me that the past few days as well bc i never help out w chores or anything. she's always asking me "what do u do for this family" or "what do u do in this house" every single time nd ofc i cant say shit bc i dont. i'm doing uni online nd it's really not that easy but bc i dont talk to my family like at all, they think i'm all good. the other day i pissed them off nd my parents straight up said "why do we need to pay for ur uni ure not doing anything anyway" & i jus... i didnt even know if i even deserve to feel sad over it. they were asking me what i wanna do after uni as if im not just in my first year & when i said im not sure they got so mad and my mum purposely said "just marry her off" to push my buttons into giving them an answer. they keep saying i'm pushing them into being the worst and saying the worst to me but how is that fair? they're parents? adults? i'm jus 20 & i can control my emotions? but today really jus pushed me she got so mad at me for the littlest things nd i jus exploded. I asked her why she's mad and she's like cuz of the kitchen bla bla bla nd it got so frustrating i told her it's not my problem nd i jus wont ever eat again since all the unwashed dishes piling is my fault. nd then she got mad at me for that and scolded me. I hate being touched but mostly i hate being hit. imagine getting hit at 20 years old bc my mother is too emotionally unstable that she cant take a few seconds by herself to calm her anger down. I hate it. nd bc i said it's not my problem she came nd told me "yea it won't be ur problem when i die too! i'll make sure when i do, u never come see me." jus... what kind of parent says that? i'm so careful w what i say & i slip sometimes bc i'm human but how can a mother say that? she doesnt know anything about me. she doesn't know i dont like being hit, she doesnt know i dont like it when ppl act impulsively on emotions. sometimes i feel like i really am the problem nd that i'm really selfish. spending shit ton of money to get me to study, maybe i am selfish. i dont mind it. i know myself well enough to hate things about myself. but to have parents who barely know me as a person rather than a daughter, getting this much mad at me for smthn so simple jus makes me so sad. bc i was doing the task when she asked. she does things like this then wonders why i cant ever talk to her. entire family thinks i'm immature bc i behave exactly how they treat me. 20 years. I never ask for much. but it's starting to feel like asking to study in the uk was my greatest downfall. it feels like i dont deserve this. every day i'm itching to get away, to live alone bc they've made me feel like i can never work well in groups. it's always somehow my fault as if they havent been invalidating me nd my feelings since birth.

nd i can never tell them all these bc i'm never confident in them. i'm never confident in whether i would be accepted nd comforted without ridicule or scolding. my brother & father tell me it's like that, that jus bc i may get a scolding shouldn't stop me from being open. but what kind of stupidity is that? my mother who makes me feel like the world is ending when i accidentally break smthn, that it wasn't an accident but rather it's me nd that i jus cant do a good job— where is the comfort i can ever find coming to her w a problem?

nd bc of that we're not close. bc of that she's closer to my cousins & everyone else really. they've never concerned themselves to talking about family issues w me but when i dont know, they shame me, saying i never bother to ask— how would i know when to ask? should they be telling me when there's smthn going on?

this makes the concept of family so repelling for me. there is inherently no reason to ever have a child that isnt selfish or self fulfilling. what they do as parents is to make them feel as important nd respected as they expect from the child. but it's never like that w south asians. emotions dont exist if ure the child nd apparently getting mad is a norm nd shouldn't stop u from being emotional w someone.

at times i tell myself that i should pay back every penny my parents spent on me. bc sometimes it feels like it's being used to make me act or feel a certain way. i dont wanna feel this way. theyre my parents, i know theyre good people. but i'm so hurt by the things going on nd the things from the past. my mother invalidates me sm. she more or less kinda blamed me for feeling useless and depressed last year. my brother was telling her to go easy on me nd she got so mad & frustrated bc she didnt know what she was doing wrong. "if she feels so useless why doesnt she do anything about it?" like that was such a golden chance for her to have comforted me nd i couldve opened up? but she ruined it nd hurt me again.

last year i lived w her alone nd my dad was in our home country. I was having some troubles w him gone but i dont call or text bc... it always felt like a drag. it never felt like a conversation nd the only time it did was when i complained to him about my mum. so much shit happened between my mum and i & this person advised me to jus write some of my feelings to her. so i wrote her a long letter nd i included saying how not having my dad was hard on me too. flash forward im in my home country & w my dad. i know nobody here bc i didnt grow up here. i'm doing online uni & basically have to stay indoors cuz of covid. she brings that letter up when she was to berate me nd it jus feels so uncomfortable for me? like ok my actions dont line up but i wrote that cuz i was looking for comfort nd understanding. if i knew it was going to be held against me, i would not have done it? "u said it was so hard for u without him, so what do u even do for him here now?"— what can i do? i'm just 20 nd the situation im in is not normal? i'm grateful to be w my dad again but what can i do? &it always freaking comes down to house chores. i try my best. when our maid doesnt come i do my best w my tasks. i know it's not enough but i jus... i dont even know. ig that part of me is selfish nd lazy.

it's so suffocating here. all my feelings are bottled up nd im so scared what that would do to me in the future. but at least i know i'm too selfish to ever spend the rest of my life w someone.

sorry for the long rant. i hope this didnt ruin ur mood or anything i jus need an outlet nd ur blog jus feels so comforting nd welcoming. thank u for listening to me nd my feelings. God bless u really kssjdjsj

i’m rlly sorry this is happening to you bby. idk what race u are but this sounds so much like that asian mentality where emotions are black and white and comfort in any way is out of the question. ur still rlly young tho so ur relationship with ur parents has room to improve i promise. i think it’s rlly important for u to move out whenever u can tho bc that’s what rlly improves the relationship. having said this i do think the way your mum talks to u/treats u is emotionally and mentally abusive so whether you want to uphold that tie with her in the future is ur choice i just rlly hope u get somewhere safe and away from ur family soon x

I honestly don't know why some people get so mad about a story having angst and characters having or going through different forms of trauma. Like I get being sad a bit, but you have to realize that the angst isn't there for no reason- it's essential to the plot, character development, etc. of a fanfic (or just a normal novel). Zuko getting kidnapped is a big part of the story Hella wants to tell, and yes it's been four months which is a long time, but it's also changed Zuko and the swt a lot, which'll change the outcome and relationships of the rest of taob. Obviously atla has lots of time skips in the show, so the period of four months is probably an accurate amount of time passed to skip to the point in the show where Hella would want Zuko to (excape/get rescued/etc). Sometimes authors like to joke about sad stuff to the readers cuz their responses are funny, but it's not like they write sad things just to fuck with people.

Then there are some people who get really upset about the things that happen and even try to get the writer to change the story- and not at all in a joking sense. If the author wanted the story to be different, they would have written it that way. Lanse is dead, and that happened for symbolic reasoning and to give some character dynamics to Zi se, and Zuko's time in the prison would serve the purpose of an accurate time skip, a change in Zuko's character, a change in the ulaakut crew and Toph, and who knows what else.

I get that some people get upset jokingly but I feel like other people just really cant get over some things and if they really have a problem with the way things are going they either need to try and get over it, avoid reading the story, or at least NOT harass the author for what they choose to write.

I'm not saying that anyone is really harrassing Hella, because I obviously don't know everone who talks with her, but I think it's a good point to make so that people remember not to hurt the feelings of ANY writers for writing the stories they want to tell and letting certain events play out how they want, even if the things that happen are unfortunate. Not every story is a happy fluffy love trip where all the characters' problems are immediately solved.

I remember a long time ago I read a facfic and the readers got really angry at the direction in which the fic turned and the author was so upset that they discontinued it. Fanfic authors write their fics because they have a story they're willing to share with other people without pay, and for people to get upset at them for not writing what they'd like just seems rude to me.

Sorry this got kind of long lmao

hi hello i love you. your presence on earth is a blessing. i wasn’t sure whether to post this or not at first because i don’t want anyone getting the wrong idea, but i think it’s quite important especially in regards to that end bit. to be clear; i have never felt like you guys are harassing me. there might have been times when you were being serious and it went over my head because i’m stupid like that, but majority of the time i really love the balance of humour and deep-thinking we’ve all got going here. like i’m probably more proud of the atmosphere in the Cult™ than i am of taob itself. i truly do love you all as HUMILIATING and GROSS as that is.

however, op got some good points in that sometimes - especially over anonymous - readers can get very .... passionate. now i personally have a very mean sense of humour so i either bounce off that, or if i see an ask i don’t vibe with in this regard, i delete it and don’t think twice about it after that. however some fanfic authors won’t be like that. the people writing these stories are, at the end of the day, human. i’ve seen authors who are literally fifteen or sixteen years old having to tackle really quite aggressive asks when i know for a fact they’re actually very sensitive people. i’m not saying you guys need to never be passionate ever, and i’m not even really talking to you guys personally because i’ve genuinely not encountered a single asshole through taob (touch wood), but in a general sense in the community as a whole.

just remember to be nice to your fic writers <3

(i however will continue to bully you all so im giving you a free pass to bully me back, it’s only fair. you were already doing it anyway but Just So We’re Clear)