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#cursed news lads
hella1975 · 7 months
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hiiii haha. hello. exceptionally awkward introduction bc idrk how to start something like this so let's just jump right in. im taking a break from this account for a bit. i know i said i wanted taob out before halloween and currently im fine sticking with that deadline, but if i decide i need longer away then i will take longer away. every time ive reassured people that id never abandon a fic and updates will always come eventually i never once considered that my writing and ability to feel safe and comfortable on this site would be actively taken from me, so im not even going to apologise. i dont want this either and more importantly i dont fucking deserve it. i dont know what it is in the past year, if ive hit a certain amount of followers or 'popularity' that's made it so the natural ratio of positive to negative interactions must in turn go up, but there's been a serious uptick in weird asks for me. the annoying part is that a very small amount of them are actually objectively mean and hateful, the rest are just weird and invasive from people who seemingly dont realise that's what they're being. ive reached a point where i dont care if the intentions are good. it's not my job as a 20 year old tumblr user of all things to defend the morality of someone who couldnt even bother to come off anon. unfortunately, after blocking only one or two anons, the weird asks have decreased substantially, which says all you need to know about the fascinating and exhilarating lives led by these people, but ive also gone on to turn anon asks off entirely. this is something i actively fought against doing and had to be pushed into by my mutuals (who have been the coolest people on planet earth during this entire thing). turning off anon was a big deal to me even if it sounds silly. i felt betrayed and like id been backed into a corner because it was so vehmently something i DIDNT WANT that to feel like i had to do it anyway for my own mental health??? that sucks. so even though ive 'fixed' the problem, im still kind of reeling and uncomfortable every time i come on tumblr. i hope it's just something i need time to ease because i'll truly be devastated if this becomes 'ruined' for me. tumblr exists as the only place in the world where i am honestly every facet of myself without shame or hesitation; losing that would be insanely harmful to me. and to the people who cant appeal to the actual human behind the post, let me put that in words you can understand: we wouldn't get any more writing 😦😦😦 riots and fires and sirens, i know. so yeah. to anyone who has sent me an anon ask and you're now wondering if you were part of the problem, im firmly of the belief that you'll know if you are. when i say 'weird asks' i dont mean 'you sent me a para about your personal life just to vent or ask for advice' or 'you sent me a really deep emotional compliment about the impact me and/or my writing has had on you' - i love asks like that, so much that i put off taking a break and turning off anon solely for the joy they bring me. im sorry that it might feel like you're being punished too bc of the actions of what in reality is a HANDFUL of weird people, but this is what i feel like i have to do to feel safe and not go insane every time i log in. love you guys, hopefully ill see you soon x
#seriously another shout out to my mutuals#id particularly like to say thank you to boom who's always right there for me no matter what's happening or how insane im being#and also everyone in our little discord that wound up having to make a whole new channel for venting#bc i was there so often like 'today's weird ask isssss.... telling me about my cupsize!! rip them to shreds!!!'#hannah and theo especially being there and pushing me to finally turn off anon. war is truly over#and of course rori bc the shamelessness u show when hating on my anon asks has been genuinely really cathartic#sometimes u really do just need a rottweiler mutual to tell random people online to kill themselves 😭#okay weird oscar acceptance speechcore gratitude over. i do just rlly love my mutuals#like i went three years not telling anyone about the worse side of internet popularity for fear of looking spoiled and ungrateful#so for the first time to open up about it and be met with outrage on my behalf and people saying in fact it's MORE fucked up#than i initially realised bc ive grown desensitised to it is. yeah cathartic i guess#they are singlehandedly reassuring me of the good this cursed app still holds#so everyone thank them and send them flowers NOW#okay im done i think. see you guys soon. i truly do want to come back asap bc like i said i NEVER EVEN WANTED TO FUCKING LEAVE#SOME ASSHOLES JUST HAD TO PUT GRENADES ON WHAT I ASSUMED WERE VERY UNIVERSAL AND OBVIOUS BOUNDARIES#if you're reading this like 'ohhh fuck i defo sent something invasive lately. i thought it was a joke/we were friends'#then 1) we arent friends if you're on anon. it immediately creates a power imbalance where you know me and any necessary context#but i have no idea who you are or how much you know about me. that's already a fucked dynamic#and 2) I HOPE YOU FEEL BAD. LIKE GENUINELY I HOPE YOU FEEL AWFUL AND HAVE A GOOD LONG LOOK AT YOURSELF#okay i think that's all. ta-ra lads??? how tf do u end something like this#ive queued this to reblog a couple more times throughout the day
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elmaestrostan · 4 months
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The way my day improves when Villa socials post a random shot of Unai with his little ball & clipboard.
That eye is still looking a bit sore.
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fromacatastrophe · 5 months
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so I'm playing as Michael Knight (of 1980's TV series Knight Rider) in BG3 and this man is having the worst time ever. KITT's nowhere to be found (how do you tadpole a car? even a talking one?), there's a slug in his head, and his new allies are terrifyingly eager to fight people to the death over things he's sure he's sure he'd be able to talk his way out of.
I'm pretty sure he takes the whole magic-being-real/mythological-creatures-are-just-people thing in stride. He's an accepting guy, and he has so many bigger problems right now. Occasionally sticks his foot in his mouth, but really - who doesn't?
I decided to start him as a ranger since that's basically what he does for FLAG, and I'm thinking of multiclassing him into rogue later on.
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I think I did a decent job of coercing the character customization menu into producing David Hasslehoff, though the nose/browline is just far enough off to bug me.
Anyway I made the dream visitor as a male drow with red/black eyes and glossy black hair. Michael is going to react... mm, strongly, when it speaks with KITT's voice.
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eattheglowingmoss · 2 years
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A friend of mine just started playing Fallout New Vegas and it took me minutes after character creation to start drawing their courier.
So here's my courier, Ame Ortiz, with his new best friend in the entire world (who, strangely enough is also a courier with a habit of getting into life or death situations) Oliver "Oli" Byun
@cinnabeebie
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dutybcrne · 7 months
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Okay okay, but consider:
Kaeya with tapetum lucidum
#hc; kaeya#//Or smth like that; anyways#//Point I'm getting at is Kae with eerie glowy eyes due to The Curse/Abyssal connections#//Mans can teleport like the Abyss Mages; there is a REASON#//anywho; back to fun hc#//Mans scaring tf outta everybody in the Ragnvindr household at least once every few nights back in the day#//Deffo spooked Addie & Crepus after waking from a nightmare and them rushing in to help#//Absolutely made Luc cry the first time he paid the lad a late night visit bc he didn't wanna be alone#//Esp if it was a thundering night; and the lightnings Spooked the heck outta Kae#//In present day; deffo spooks new recruits and late night wanderers alike#//when asked; he suggests it's a byproduct of his Vision and the Exact Circumstances he got it in#//The story going around being he stumbled into a domain and got burned by a Pyro Abyss Mage#//He doesn't discourage it; better folks think that than Ever realize it was really Luc#//Anywho; bonus bits; he deffo has better nightvision than most anyone else in Mond; save select few#//Those primarily being Kätzlein or Kreideprinz#//And whatever Klee's got goin on lmao#//He'll call it a combo of intuition and elemental sight#//Likes to prank Jean with this a lot; using it as his excuse to get her to rest bc if That can catch her off guard; she really Must need i#//Tried it with Lisa (1) time then Never Again. Bc she electrocuted the HECK outta him#//Has the irritating downside of Diluc or an enemy being able to keep an eye out for him easier#//Kaeya hates that part; though it being able to scare the living daylights out of treasure hoarders is p funny
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chiropteracupola · 2 years
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That reminds me! Tell us about your Ladyhawke AU for Flight of the Heron?
okay, I did not intend to mention that as Bait To Talk About My Fic, but talk about it I certainly will!
for those unfamiliar with my secondary source material, the core of ladyhawke is a curse placed on a pair of lovers so that one is trapped in an animal form during the day and the other during the night, stuck forever in a cycle of transformation and exchange, inseparable but forever apart.
and I thought, seeing that, 'you know who else has a fun little narrative full of reversals and intertwinings and significant birds and a very specific sort of defiant loyalty that keeps coming back around despite everything else? keith and ewen, that's who.'
so now I find myself juggling the second of two rather brain-breaking fantasy aus wherein ewen cameron gets turned into a bird. but it's good it's cool! *uneasily side-eyes the ~4500 words of this I've managed to scribble out in the last month-and-a-half*
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The lake is already turning gold in the afternoon sun, the flash of light against water as rich and brilliant as if the sun itself had been drawn down to rest in the little hollow between the hills. Keith shades his eyes with his free hand, staring out at the little island that rests dark amid that glare and the distant splinters of trees that rise from its stone. Stepping nearer to the water, he retraces old paths, though the house is all but empty now and the lakeside likewise. The wildflowers twined among the reeds just at the point where meadow becomes shore are not ones whose names he knows, and once again Ewen’s weight on his arm sits heavily, for all that he is present and at the same time absent. He shifts from foot to foot, inclining his head slightly to push against Keith’s shoulder, and with that little nudge, Keith recalls what it had felt like to have Ewen’s arms properly around him.
For now, though, that is out of reach entirely, so he lifts his arm, and with the little flick of the wrist that now comes naturally to him, tosses Ewen into the air. Without that weight bearing down on him, he feels almost as if he too is flying.
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theninjamouse · 2 years
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Finally back, my car is dead and I'm supposed to drive to salt lake tomorrow and if it's the electric battery that's dead I might be screwed, here's a picture of my son, it's all gonna. Be. Fine
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shrimpscrawling · 2 years
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Slow blinking at my colleague who offered me a lime flavoured ice pole like a cat fresh off a hot tin roof: grateful for a puddle to drink from. I love u and thank u, I hope u know
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myighlou · 3 months
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everyday i forget and then everyday i remember how much of a loser i am for more more jump
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Vacation: Part one
PART TWO PART THREE
Pairing :: OPLA!Sanji x fem!Reader
Warnings :: 18+ Content, NSFW/SMUT, Oral(f recieving), Semi-Public sex(they did it in an alley), Light teasing
Word Count ::  3,373
Summary :: After being forced on a vacation at the Baratie, you catch the eye of a certain blond cook who loves to tease you.
A/N :: I was trying to find the right mix between pervert simp anime Sanji and suave charming live-action Sanji. There will for sure be a part two.
Go watch the One Piece live-action.
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“I see a place we can stop to make repairs, Captain Tommy,” You said, eye still focused on the small floating mass in the distance.
You worked on a merchant ship for a wealthy businessman named Greylock. You were his top secret contract negotiator. The reason you were a “secret” was because he never introduced you as a negotiator. You would always find your way to sneak into his potential clients’ and contract partners’ inner circle to figure out what type of people they were and what they wanted. With this personal knowledge, you would then come up with the best plan of action to secure a beneficial deal for the business. It was easy for you thanks to your typically quiet demeanor. You knew when to stay silent and read the room.
Captain Tommy, Greylock’s business partner, set a course for the wooden structure floating. “Let’s hope the owner’s kind enough to let us port for a while.”
“How long do you think it’ll take to repair the damages?”
“The storm banged us up pretty good, not to mention all the scrapes we’ve gotten from pirates.” He glanced around the ship. “I’d say at least three to four weeks.”
You cursed quietly under your breath. “Greylock isn’t going to be happy about that.”
Captain Tommy shrugged. “There’s nothing we can do. The ship’s falling apart. We won’t be able to make it to a port town before the ship sinks.”
You knew Greylock would be upset once you told him, so you took precocious measures to alleviate the anger.
You stood with him on the deck, watching as you approached your soon-to-be temporary home. "You know sir, you've been mentioning wanting to take a vacation for a while."
He sighed, shrugging. "That's because I'm getting older and tired of working. I became a merchant to see the world, not to work endlessly."
"Well then, how about you finally take that vacation now while we repair the ship?"
He turned his head to give you a weary look. "Take a  vacation while the ship is repaired?"
You nodded with a smile. "Captain Tommy told me it would take at least three weeks to repair the ship. Instead of worrying about work, you should relax during that time."
"(Y/N)-"
"And you can give the crew a chance to rest. Were y'all dreary from that dreadful storm, not to mention the attacks we had to endure before?" You patted his shoulder. "You know what they say, a happy crew is a dutiful crew. And a tired crew typically ends up killing someone."
Grey lock laughed at your made-up saying, but you were able to persuade him. "You're right. We've been working too hard recently without a break." He looked out once more, finally in the distance to see the name of the place you'll all be staying for the next month. "Lads!" He shouted loud enough to grab everyone's attention. "I want you lot to enjoy yourselves at the Baratie. Think of our unscheduled stop as a surprise resort! Haha!"
Immediately the crew lit up. While everyone cheered and began to talk about what they'd do with their spare time, aside from repairs, you looked up at Captain Tommy. He had a small smirk, giving you a wink. He knew if anyone could get Greylock to give the entire crew a break, it'd be you.
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You walked into Baratie behind Greylock and Captain Tommy. It was typically for the three of you to grab a bite together whenever you arrived at a new town so that you could discuss your work objectives. Today, however, it was simply a meal between friends.
A fish man greeted you at the entrance, accepting a small fee before allowing you to take your seats.
You looked over the menu, wondering what to try first. You'd be around for a while and we're sure you'd get to try a few items on the menu before departing. Greylock and Captain Tommy chatted with one another, used to your silence. They knew that you spoke when you felt you needed to.
The swing doors to the kitchen flew open. You glanced up from the menu, seeing a blond man to have caused the small ruckus. He looked upset, brows furrowed and tight lips turned down.
'I wonder what got him so riled up,' You thought.
You kept your eyes on him, noticing he was making his way to your table with a tray of bread rolls in hand. When he was about halfway, he noticed you sitting right of Greylock and his mood instantly seemed to pick up. After his eyes locked with yours, his gaze lit up and a dashing smile graced his lips.
Seeing his mood do a complete one-eighty after spotting you, you shot your eyes back down to your menu. 'Please don't be our waiter. Please don't be our waiter. Plea-'
"Hello gentlemen and fair lady, my name is Sanji. What would you like to drink to start you off? We have several rare Micqueot vintages in stock."
Almost throughout his entire introduction, you could feel his line of sight fixed on you. He didn’t mind that you didn’t look at him. It allowed him to sneak a glance at your chest without being noticed.
"Anything fancy would be a waste on me. I'll just have a simple whiskey to start with," Greylock said. Captain Tommy put up two fingers, requesting the same.
"And what will you be having, darling?"
"Hm… I'll have a sweet tea."
"A sweet drink for a sweet girl understood."
Your eyes shot towards him, a little shocked by his straightforward demeanor. He gave you a quick wink before walking away.
Now, it was time for the old men to act like school girls. 
Greylock started the teasing first. "Awe, our little (Y/N) has a young man who's interested in her," 
"And by the small blush on her cheeks, I'd say she's interested too."
"Wh-what blush?" You stuttered, only now feeling the heat center in your cheeks.
"The one that's covering your entire face." Captain Tommy laughed.
"Shut up. I was just caught off guard by his remark." You practically shoved your face into the menu, embarrassed to face the men before you any longer.
They continued laughing for a moment before talking about what to order.
After Sanji came back with your drinks, it was time for you three to place your orders. Again, your colleagues ordered before you. This time though, you spoke right when Captain Tommy finished his sentence.
"And I will have the seared ahi tuna."
"Do you want the chocolate sin cake after for dessert, love? It's so moist it'll melt in your mouth, I promise," He said in a sultry tone for no other apparent reason than to get a rise out of you.
And once more, you were left stunned and your face was heating up. You were certain he was only teasing you, but you were still upset giving him the presumed reaction he wanted.
"She would love the chocolate cake!" Greylock's hand patted your back hard, causing you to fall forward a bit on the table. "It's been a while since she's had a good pastry."
“Coming right up.”
He left with a swift turn on his heels and when he was out of sight you glared daggers at the two accompanying you.
“What do you think you’re doing, sir?”
“Trying to make sure you have a fun time here.” He took a swig of his whiskey before continuing. “Listen, you’re always working hard for us, and you rarely make any time for yourself.”
You sink in your seat a bit. He was right. On the rare occasion you did flirt with others, it was to secure a deal, and then, you were gone.
“Plus, the boy’s easy on the eyes. You’d be mad to not give him a chance.” He bursted out laughing.
Captain Tommy was a bit more comforting with his words. “You probably won’t interact with him much, so don’t mind him.”
Choosing to believe him, you relaxed for the remainder of the meal. ‘Captain Tommy’s right. As long as I don’t come here again, I probably won’t run into him.’
Too bad you had a crew that loved to go out because about two days later, you found yourself back at the Baratie. This time, Sanji wasn’t your waiter which you were more than thankful for. Captain Tommy and Greylock might’ve teased you a bit, but the men with you now would have embarrassed you so much you would never step foot out of your living quarters again.
Around mid-way into your meal, you excused yourself from the table to go use the restroom. While walking down the hallway, your attention was on the various paintings that decorated the wall.
Since you weren’t paying much attention to what was in front of you, you collided with a firm chest. You nearly stumbled back until a pair of arms wrapped around you, holding you in place.
“Ah-! I-I’m so sorry! I should have been paying attention to where I was… going…” You looked up at the person you had bumped into, locking eyes with a familiar blue-eyed blond.
He gave you a large grin, replying. “No need to apologize madam. I should be the one apologizing,” You tilted your head, “for disturbing a fine piece of art like you.”
You immediately turned away, hoping he wouldn’t catch your growing blush. “Can you please let me go?” You asked timidly.
You felt his hold tighten for a quick second before letting you go. Without another word, you rushed past him to the women's restroom.
Sanji watched you run away, a playful grin plastered on his face. “Oh, I’m going to have fun with this one,” He mumbled, already missing the feeling of your body pressed against his.
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This would be how every interaction you had with the blonde cook and occasional waiter, played out. You would try to be formal with him, he'd make a flirty or suggestive comment, and then you'd start to blush or stutter.
Typically it was whenever you went to eat at Baratie, but there were a few occasions when he managed to catch you outside.
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"I must be in heaven because I'm seeing an angel before me." You tensed up in your seat and froze upon hearing Sanji.
You were at the small outdoor bar next to the giant fish-headed restaurant. Around the end of the first week, you noticed that the place had a pretty good view of the sunset. Sure, you saw the sun set often, but you rarely actually watched it fall below the horizon line, disappearing until morning. It was a minor peaceful event you wanted to enjoy on your supposed vacation alone.
The sky had already darkened by this point. You were just around to finish the drink you had.
"Good evening, Sanji."
He sat next to you, pouting playfully. "Come on m, (Y/N). We've known each other for over two weeks now. There's no need for you to keep acting so stuffy all the time."
You crossed your arms. "I'm not stuffy."
"Yes, you are. Every time I see you it's always a quick sentence or two before nothing but silence. I'm starting to think you don't like me."
'I wish it was that simple.' In fact, you were having the opposite reaction. You were used to making contracts and business deals with people when you spoke to them. You weren't used to being openly flirted with for no reason. 
Like always, you avoided making eye contact with him. This time, you fixed your attention to the remaining ice cubes in your drink.
He leaned closer to you, wrapping an arm around your shoulder. "Or maybe, it's because you're too shy to admit you like me," He whispered, hot breath hitting your ear and sending a tingle throughout your body.
You snapped your head around, face burning up when you saw how close he was. That damn coy smile plastered on his perfect lips.
He chuckled to himself, brushing a strand of your hair out of your face. "That's it, isn't it?"
"Why do you keep messing with me?" You bluntly asked. Frankly, you were getting tired of his game, even if you weren't entirely sure what this game was.
This was the first time you had caught him off guard. He leaned back a bit, tilting his head. "What makes you think I'm messing with you?"
"If you actually had an interest in me, you would've told me or showed me by now. You just keep saying sweet nothings to mess with me and I'm sick of it," Your voice was growing frustrated, finally voicing your opinion. "I'm trying to enjoy my vacation, not be bothered by some- Hey!"
He grabbed your hand, lifting you from your seat with a tug and pulling you away. You followed, partly because you were unable to pull away and partly because of curiosity as to where he was taking you. He led you to a small alley a bit away.
Before you could question his intentions, he leaned down to press a firm kiss onto your lips. His hands fell to your hips, holding onto you with a firm grasp and locking you against the wall behind you. Almost as if he were afraid you’d try to escape. His nerves were quickly set to rest when you began kissing him back, your hands holding his shoulders. His tongue licked your bottom lip and you gladly parted, allowing him to shove his tongue in your mouth.
After some time, he pulled away and began trailing kisses down your neck. As he did, you felt his hands wander to the button of your shorts.
Feeling him work to undo them you asked him, “What are you doing?”
He pulled away, a coy smile still on his face. “Showing you that I have an interest in you.”
He began to pull your shorts down and you felt your heart begin to race. You weren’t directly out in the open, but if someone going down the main walkway happened to turn their heads they’d spot the two of you.
“Sanji, wait- What if- Ngh!”
He started rubbing your clit through your growing wet panties, chuckling at the quick response he got. “‘What if’ what, darling?”
You glared at him, trying to voice your concerns, but again, he continued to distract you with pleasure.
He knelt down on one knee, grabbing your left thigh, and hooking it over his shoulder after completely removing your shorts. You watched with half-lidded eyes as he pushed and held your underwear to the side, revealing your pussy. He stuck his tongue in first, licking up your folds while maintaining eye contact with you through his blond locks. He continued this motion and you bit your bottom lip, hoping not to make a noise.
He wasn’t having any of that though. If there was one thing he loved, it was to know he was doing a good job. At first, he had started to tease you a bit because he thought you were cute when you got flustered. As the days went on, he noticed that you might not have said much, but you couldn’t hide your physical reactions to him. Your face was almost always flushed around him. Your grip on whatever you held tightened with the simplest of sentences. It made him wonder what type of lover were you? Quiet, non-verbal, highly responsive to the slightest touches, etc.?
He had just never gotten you alone to figure it out, until now.
He sucked your clit, earning a squeal in response. Your hands immediately shot down to his head, grabbing hold of his hair.
‘She looks so cute trying to stay quiet.’
He could feel his pants tightening around his crotch, watching you squirm because of his touch. It was getting difficult for you to stay up with one leg, especially when he slotted two fingers into your wet cunt. He curved his fingers in you, moving them slowly at first before picking up the pace to match how quickly he was flicking his tongue against your clit.
“Sa-Sanji, I- I don’t think I ca-can last much longer,” You whined.
Even without you telling him, he could tell you were getting close. Your walls had started to tighten around his fingers and he had to hold the thigh of your standing leg to support you. He would’ve loved to have you come undone around his tongue, however, for his first time with you, he wanted to fully see your expression.
He pulled away and you let out a loud sigh of relief, panting a bit. You were a little disappointed you hadn’t finished but were hopeful to continue this in a more private enclosed area. Your head was a bit fuzzy though, and you didn’t pick up on the small noise of him undoing his trousers or when he completely pulled down your panties.
He grabbed your thighs and housed you up to position the head of his penis right at your entrance. When you felt it rub against your slick folds, your eyes widened. The two of you watched as he pushed his cock in, seeing it disappear in your cunt. He groaned, eyes rolling back for a moment at how tight you were wrapped around him. You whined, feeling his length fill you up.
Slowly, he rocked his hips back and forth, giving you a chance to adjust to him. He watched your face with amusement, a mix of pleasure and embarrassment in your expression. You were still biting down on your lip, hoping to be as discrete as possible given the situation you were in.
With one swift hard thrust though, you let out a moan. Your legs wrapped around his hips and your arms around his shoulders. You buried your face into the crook of his neck, allowing him to clearly hear all your little whimpers and mewls of delight.
After hearing your moan, he began to thrust harder, wishing to hear more of your voice. You could hear his grunting too, breath growing heavier and heavier with each stroke inside you.
No longer needing to hold you up with both hands, one of them slipped underneath your shirt, sliding under the cup of your bra. He groped your breast, happy at how soft it was in his hand.
The harder he continued to thrust, the shakier your moans got. You were getting close to your release again and he wasn’t far behind, his own breathing now becoming ragged. Now, with each thrust, he could feel your walls tighten around him. Wanting to make sure he got a good look at your face when you came, he briefly removed his hand from your breast to tug your hair back. With your face pulled away from his neck, he plastered his lips against yours, shoving his tongue once more in your mouth. After, his hand returned to groping your breast.
His grip on your thigh was so tight, that you were sure there would be markings. With how hard he was kissing you, your lips were bound to be puffy when he stopped.
Your mind was becoming foggy and all you were focused on was the pleasure you were in, no longer caring someone caught you. You moaned against his lips, your entire body growing tense in his hold. Your walls clamped around him, finally hitting your high.
Seeing your eyes fall shut, engrossed in the feeling of climaxing, combined with how your cunt squeezed against him, he hit deep one last time before unraveling himself. His cock pulsed in you, dumping his entire load inside, savoring how your body milked it.
He pulled away from the kiss, each of your breaths now shaky trying to regain your composure. Your head fell back against the wall, eyes remaining on him.
“What do we do now?” You asked.
“We plan out the rest of your vacation. You’re here for at least one more week, right?” He kissed your cheek. “That gives us one more week of fun, darling.”
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clairdelunelove · 9 months
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badges of honor
simon 'ghost' riley x reader
genre: fluff! (sticker drabble!)
warnings: slightly suggestive, cursing, protective!ghost
synopsis: ghost doesn't understand the appeal of receiving stickers, a tangible reward, after the completion of successful missions. never thought it was necessary for his efforts. however, his mindset changes when he finds out you're the one handing them out–
a.n. just a silly lil blurb that floated around in my mind for some time! decided I'd write it and I'm thinking about writing something similar for könig too! hope you're all well! and if you wish to show more support here's my kofi! <3
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holding onto the belief that ghost would stubbornly swallow his pride and allow you to decorate him in cutesy unnecessary stickers.
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it starts with price’s recommendation of implementing a routine of handing out stickers after successful missions. he insists it’s a great way to dial into intrinsic motivation. to keep the task force motivated to dedicate their best into every operation. a way to recognize positive behavior. a byproduct of hoping for the most favorable outcome in war where the only images are bloodshed, conflict, and hostility. it’s a stark difference. “who knows,” price’s shoulders lift into a casual shrug as he addresses the fierce group settled around him, “it might just help you lads.” it’s a harmless and cost-efficient idea to justify the boxes of tangible reinforcements that are shipped to the base. literal cartons of sticker books that range from the traditional ‘great work!’ to ‘prized soldier!’ and the notion seems childish (disguised to be more of a scheme, in all honesty). that is, until the pieces of sticky, illustrated adhesives start working– boosting the soldiers’ determination for the taste of victory– because you’re the one handing out the affordable versions of chest candy. they adore saccharine treats. and over time, so does ghost. 
ghost who initially loathes the new process that price endorses. he’s good at his job. knows he’s an expert in clandestine tradecraft. doesn’t need a miniature label tapped on his chest to recognize that no one does a better service in infiltrations or sabotages in risky environments than he does. he’s in and out like a gust of wind. well, more similar to a grim reaper that takes and punishes whoever he deems fit. a brutish force not to be reckoned with. and he reasons that this little sticker ceremony ultimately wastes time. precious alone time that ghost exploits to catch up on some well-deserved rest or exercise. because training after an intense mission totally makes sense to the lieutenant. yet, he’ll doggedly line up with the rest of the task force and await getting crowned with the bane of his existence. doesn’t wish to stir the pot with price and sit through being lectured. so he stays. and he’s a bit taken aback when he catches a glimpse of you handing out the stickers; a beaming smile on your lips while you press an overly exaggerated thumbs-up design onto the front of a soldier’s vest. 
ghost who rasps, “I’ll pass,” before your fingers can pin the sticker onto him. unaware that his voice would come out grainy from the weeklong mission and, involuntarily, blunt. brash. the complete opposite of how he wished to sound towards you. notices the surprise in your eyes due to the acidity of his voice and how you instinctively shrink from him. he shifts, straight away, and hastily tries to take back his tone of voice. to right his wrongs. to atone for his mistake. however, your nervous movement is swiftly replaced with your usual upbeat nature as you plaster on a grin and dramatically bring the back of your hand to your forehead to mimic a fall, “woe is me.” you exhale pointedly while mentioning, “whatever shall I do with all these stickers then?” and ghost understands that it’s so typical of you to hide your hurt with witticism. you’re too considerate. too bright. a touch of color to his monochrome soul. venturing a step closer to you, he lightly scoffs at your melodramatic behavior and remarks, “woe is most definitely not you. now get up, pup.” and before you can comprehend, his gloved hand wraps around your wrist to gently pry it away from your face. “changed my mind,” he murmurs while indicating to the book of stickers that you casted aside, “pick one f’ me, will ya.” 
ghost who refuses to comment on your shaky fingers to save you from embarrassment. it’s endearing that despite the layers of heavy clothing, you’re still hesitant to touch any part of him. “you’re all set,” you quickly chirp before stepping back to admire your handiwork. or so you tell yourself that excuse. in reality, you’re teetering on the edge of becoming distracted by the heat that he radiates. and he savors how your gaze dances across his masked face but evades his intense eyes. the most profound part of him that reduces you to stumbling on your words like a drunk. intoxicated by him. it’s like he’s drinking you in and allowing himself a selfish taste of your beauty. a thought that causes you to heavily gulp. to take your mind off of the blatant yearning, you teasingly raise the sticker book up to him, “how about I add another one? this one has glitter—” “that’ll do,” ghost interjects and turns to leave. his immediate answer and retreat brings about a genuine laugh from your lips. it’s music to his ears. wagering a glance to his chest, he notes the sticker you chose for him. cursive letters twisting into ‘you’re a star!’ followed by a smiling gold star draws his attention. you don’t spot it but as he leaves, his gloved fingers reach up to smooth the sticker over his vest. to pat it down so it stays a while longer. 
ghost who attempts to convince himself that his disinterest toward the small slips of adhesive paper is still the truth. they’re just for show, right? no one really pays attention to how some of the stickers varied in size. they’re all mature adults. and it was completely unrelated how there’s regular bickering amongst various recruits that compared their hard-earned rewards. doesn’t admit that his chest visibly swells with pride whenever the other soldiers point out that ghost always receives the biggest sticker. purposefully taunts them by stating, “get better then, yeah?” he also fails to acknowledge that you’ve coerced and conditioned him to accept them like a pavlov experiment. after all, your unwillingness to comment on how he noticeably leans over so you can put stickers wherever you wished must mean that it doesn’t happen. and in the scenario where it could perhaps occur, you shouldn’t blame him because ghost was certain no one else had the willpower to brush you away. you with gentle fingers and an angelic voice. singing him a siren song whenever you mutter, “for your excellent work, lieutenant,” as you smooth on another ridiculous sticker. his heart stutters in his chest when he feels how your hand tentatively flattens against his chest. the broad muscle causing you to hum appreciatively before gracing him with a coy smile. an interaction that replays in his mind whenever he’s awake and follows him to sleep. 
ghost who clenches his fist so tightly that his blunt nails bite into his own palm when he overhears a lowly recruit outrightly insult the implemented routine. hears them utter (when you’re out of earshot of course because goodness forbid that they have courage) ‘bullshit’ and how you were ‘off your rocker for putting up with this waste of time.’ and ghost isn’t usually responsive in situations like this. he’s got a covert operation to focus on in about 15 minutes. a level-headed person was far more intimidating and efficient during classified matters. now, however, his heavy boots thud against the floorboards when he stalks toward the recruit. an abrupt wave of darkness and unabridged horror before the recruit is face-to-face with ghost. “problem?” he asks challenges, voice dead and devoid of sympathy. his head slowly tilts and the action creates a dismal shadow over the eye sockets of his mask. ominous and menacing. everything that ghost is infamous for. knows he’s won when the recruit’s apology is nasally and on the verge of crying but their reaction isn’t his personal interest. what he does undertake as his responsibility, though, is when he’s called into price’s office for a debrief. he pockets some of the miscellaneous sticker books that sit on the superior’s desk. wordlessly hands them to you when you’re both briefly passing each other in the hallway. and while you profusely thank him for the additional sets (vaguely wondering what caused the change in his behavior), you playfully press a sticker above the lower portion of his mask– right where his lips are. somewhere new. you leave him rooted to the spot, the sweet gesture sending him into a stupor, and call over your shoulder, “compensation for the stickers!” he watches as you hurriedly dart away before he can react but there’s no need. he unabashedly smuggles more stickers from price’s office in hopes of reaping a similar repayment again.
ghost who reasons that stickers aren’t that bad if you’re the one giving them out. he organizes himself with the rest of the force, a brooding figure that patiently waits in the back of the line. favors being the last one because you’re able to utter more than a few words of encouragement to him. if he’s lucky then you converse and excitedly share your day with him– like you currently are. “want me all to yourself, do you?” you heartily tease him upon noticing that he’s consistently been last in line for the third time in a row. he shifts on his feet, makes a show of looking around at his fellow team members that are filtering out of the room, and deliberately concedes, “‘suppose so.” his frank answer is followed by a flustered roll of your eyes but it’s the genuineness that causes your heart to flip. you force yourself to concentrate on the task at hand– giving out prizes. unsteady fingers lifting at the sticker page, you skim the options before spotting a perfect one. your teeth catch the edge of your bottom lip as you can’t help but question, “you say that to everyone, simon?” his real name on your glossy lips. a prayer that he desires to hear being chanted over and over as he holds you in his arms. the gaze he wraps you in is burning. tempting. exhilarating. you push yourself up on your toes to reach out and place a sticker on his cheek. on the hard shell of his skull mask that you’ve learned will ultimately end in halfhearted chiding because the adhesive is difficult to remove off of it. ghost catches a glimpse of the sticker that you’ve picked. the bolded words of ‘#1 lieutenant’ flashes at him. and the sticker is like a brand you’ve adorned him in. an embellishment that he proudly displays and wears because it’s what you’ve given him. he hums, dark and inquiring, when he leans to graze his masked lips against your inner wrist. his eyes are heady and half-lidded. clouded with a violent craving for you– always you. visibly strains to make contact with your exposed skin by tilting his head to place another chaste kiss on your hand while murmuring, “just to the sweet ‘n pretty ones that I fancy.” 
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new year's stranger
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in which harry and y/n only see each other on new year's and he tries to convince her it's fate.
word count: 5.5k
content warnings: cheating (not on y/n or harry), drinking, drug use
masterlist | talk to me
. . .
New Year's Eve, 2020
Y/N hates New Year's. 
If it were up to her, she'd sleep right through it, but Alice would never let her do that. It's why she's at this party to begin with. The owner of the house is a friend of Alice's who Y/N has never met, and isn't expecting to be introduced to tonight. The second they walked in, it was pure chaos, and it set off blaring alarms of anxiety throughout her entire body. She'd lost Alice somewhere around 10:30, but she was grateful that despite having a less than fun time, time still ticked steadily to midnight. 
The sooner 2021 arrives, the sooner she can leave.
Harry, on the other hand, doesn't mind New Year's, but he hates this party.
Gemma forced him out with her and her boyfriend after finding out his planned accompaniment for the evening was a bottle of red wine and his favorite Elton John records. She said she hated to see him having a hard time with the breakup (that made Harry want to throw up on the spot) and demanded that he at least try to have a nice time tonight. 
However, she failed to loop him in on the details of this party, which was apparently a proper rager that had him feeling like he was 17 again, but only in the worst ways. 
He wasn't snooty by any means, but if one more drunk person comes up to him and asks if he's the Harry Styles, Gemma and her boyfriend can try to find an Uber home. 
(He would actually never do that, knowing it would be impossible to locate one that wasn't three times the normal price given the holiday, but he can't help imagining cozying up in his bed, clutching one of his ex-girlfriend's tee-shirts, soaking it with tears, and falling asleep.)
It's why he's taken to sitting outside in this stranger's backyard, enjoying their wooden patio set. He doesn't typically smoke but he's chain smoking cigarettes tonight; he asked to bum one off of some guy inside, and he gave him the entire pack because he's — you guessed it — that lad from One Direction! So now it's sitting prettily next to a half-gone bottle of Cabernet, and Harry really, truly thinks this may be the worst New Year's he's had in a very long time.
He's grateful no one's discovered his little hiding spot yet, but perhaps he's spoken too soon as he takes a draw from the lit cigarette in his right hand. His shoulders tense when he hears the patio door slide open, desperately hoping Gemma found him and wants to go home. 
"Oh, fuck, I'm sorry." The voice says, making Harry crane his neck slightly to see its owner. He can't really tell if he recognizes them, but it's clearly a female figure dressed in a black mini skirt, tights, and an oversized vintage sweater. "I didn't know anyone was out here, sorry."
"'s fine," Harry mutters, stubbing his cigarette out in the grass and toeing it out with his slip-on Vans, "It's all yours."
He goes to stand up, reaching over to grab the neck of the bottle of wine, when he accidentally bumps into the small table and knocks it over. He curses loudly as he watches the deep red hue stain the concrete floor, the puddle growing larger with each passing second.
"That's unfortunate." she points out and he scoffs. If he wasn't in such a piss poor mood, he may have contemplated cleaning it up, but he's decided that he doesn't like the owners of the house, especially because of their tiny little patio table. 
"I think the hosts of this party are dicks, so I wouldn't worry about wiping that up," she says, almost as if she's reading his mind, "Sorry if you're friends with them."
"I'm not." Harry says curtly, leaning down to at least pick up the shattered pieces of glass.
"That's good. They're letting people do blow and ketamine off their dining room table. I think breakfast tomorrow will be interesting."
He snorts as he gathers broken chunks. He thinks that she's left him alone when he doesn't hear her ramble on anymore, but she returns a moment or two later with a garbage bag. She gets down on her knees and nudges the opening in his direction, wordlessly encouraging him to drop the pieces in it.
"Thanks." he mumbles through a sigh. 
"Sure," she nods, "Having a bad night?"
"Yeah. Don't really feel like talking about it, to be honest."
Harry knows better than to discuss personal matters with strangers at parties (he learned that lesson years ago), regardless of how down he's feeling. She shuts up after that and continues helping him clean up the shards, tying off the bag when all that's left is a dark purple mess.
"I'll toss it." he says, stretching his arm out to take the garbage bag. She nods and gives it to him. "Thank you for helping."
He hopes she takes the hint as he ambles through the darkness of this unfamiliar backyard, attempting to locate the garbage bins. Eventually, he finds one (he knew they were shitty people, they don't even have a separate one for recycling!), and breathes a sigh of relief when he turns and sees that she's gone. He was starting to worry that she would ask for a picture or an autograph. 
He sits back in his original seat and pulls his phone from his pants pocket, scrolling through drunken New Year's texts from people he barely knows. Really, he's only looking for two names (Gemma looking for him, or his ex-girlfriend magically deciding she needs to be with him going into the new year), but neither appear. He grumbles and reaches over to grab the pack of cigarettes, jumping in surprise when he realizes the girl is standing there with another bottle of wine. 
He clutches his chest dramatically, "Were you trying to scare me or something?"
"Oh! No, I'm sorry, you just looked busy so I was waiting," she replies, placing the unopened bottle on the table. "Here. Um, is it okay if I sit out here? We don't have to talk. I know you said you don't want to."
His night can't get much worse, so why not split some wine that suspiciously appeared with a stranger that refuses to leave him alone? 
"Sure." he mutters.
As promised, it's silent for awhile. She doesn't say anything but he notices her pick at her tights, then her nails, clearly antsy from the lack of discussion. The steady thumping from the music inside is the only relief. 
He doesn't know if it's been five or 10 or maybe even 15 minutes, but finally, he breaks. He holds in a sigh as he turns his head to look at her. 
"Are you having a bad night, too?"
She shrugs. "Kind of. I just don't really like New Year's."
He nods in understanding, "It is a bit overhyped."
"I lost my friend awhile ago," she adds, biting her lip. "I feel like I'll end up just going home a little after midnight."
"Yeah, my sister and her boyfriend dragged me here but I haven't seen them in hours."
She chuckles humorlessly. "Maybe I'll just try to get a cab now." 
Harry glances at the time on his phone screen. It's 11:04 and he knows it would be stupid to do the thing he's thinking about, but he can't help it — maybe it's the strange connection he's feeling to his fellow sad stranger, or maybe he just really wants to go home and needs a good excuse. The words are leaving his mouth before he even truly contemplates it.
"That's crazy, you'll never be able to get an Uber at this time. If you don't live too far, I can give you a ride."
Y/N is quick to bat him off, easily rejecting his offer. "Thank you, but you don't have to do that. I'm sure you have tons of plans tonight."
A wrinkle forms between Harry's brows. "No, actually. This was it. And if I'm being honest, I'm dying to get out of here, too."
He watches as she contemplates it, gnawing on her bottom lip and wringing her hands in her lap like a child. Finally, he speaks up.
"I'm leaving with or without you, so really, it's your choice."
Her eyes glance over to him and she quickly nods, gathering her purse to her side. "Okay, yeah. I'll take the ride, please."
"Sure," he says with a nod, rising from his seat. "Do you live far from here?"
She gives him her address, surprised to find out that she only lives a few streets over from his own apartment. He sends off a text to Gemma, claiming that he ran into someone and needed to take them home (it wasn't a complete lie, even if he knows he was being pushy about leaving), and they silently walk in the dark, one in front of the other, quiet footsteps sounding against the stone pathway of the backyard. Eventually, they approach his sleek black Range Rover, Harry mumbling out a "this is me" and unlocking the doors so she can get in the passenger's seat. 
"Thank you again for this," she says as he cranks the heat up. He had noticed that her teeth were chattering on the short walk back to his car. 
"'s fine."
Harry doesn't play music or say anything else on the short drive to her place. Exhaustion is hitting hard and he's ready to go home and curl up in a sad ball. When he pulls up to her apartment, she's already clicking her seatbelt off and pulling her keys out of her bag. He wonders if he was being that standoffish, to the point where she's all but jumping out of his moving car.
"Well, happy New Year." she murmurs with a small smile, glimpsing over at his tight expression. He nods curtly, hands gripping the steering wheel.
"Happy New Year." he returns tersely. 
"I hope 2021 is better for you," she says, her tone almost so genuine it makes his heart thump wildly in his chest, but just for a moment. "I'm sorry you had a shitty night."
He swallows harshly, willing away the lump of tears forming in his throat just from a stranger's kindness. 
"Same to you." 
She pauses, as if she wants to say more, but instead pushes the door open and gets out. With one last smile, she waves goodbye to Harry. 
He waits to make sure she gets in safely before driving away.
. . .
New Year's Eve, 2021
"I'm not going out to a karaoke bar on New Year's Eve."
Y/N rolls her eyes at Mike, her boyfriend of six months. She had told him weeks ago that this was the plan for the night — her friends wanted to have a fun time out, and after last year's disaster of an evening, she was more than willing to put some cash in to rent out a room at a karaoke bar in downtown LA. But of course, a mere hour before they were due to all meet up for dinner, Mike was trying to bail. 
"You agreed to this forever ago," Y/N replies with a sigh, lowering her eye shadow brush. She swivels in her seat to face him with a slight pout. "It'll be fun, I promise."
"What's so fun about people singing shitty cover songs all night?" he sneers, crossing his arms over his chest childishly. "I think it would be better if I just went to Reese's place tonight. He's having a party, you should go there instead, too."
"I already put money down and told my friends I was doing this with them, Mike."
He scoffs. "But I'm your boyfriend."
"And they're my friends."
"So you're seriously gonna ditch me, then?" he asks snidely, a pang of guilt firing through Y/N's chest.
"I mean, maybe I can meet up with you later? I can try to come to Reese's after dinner or something."
He rolls his eyes, making him look like an angsty teenager. 
"Whatever. Don't bother, I'll just see you tomorrow or something."
Mike doesn't even send her off with a kiss or wish her a happy New Year before he's out the door. Y/N sighs, resisting the urge to bury her head in her hands and mess up the makeup she's applied to her face. Mike was great at the beginning — she thought she'd really gotten lucky with him, but around two months ago, he started acting like everything she asked him to do was a chore. From date nights to attending family dinners at her parents' place, he always made her feel dumb for requesting his presence. 
She tries to ignore the anxiety brewing in her stomach when she meets her friends for dinner. They all ask where he is, and when she has to say that he would rather go play video games with his friends all night, they're quick to jump on what an awful boyfriend he is. She knows that — she really, truly knows that, and she doesn't know why she hasn't ended things yet.
When they get to the karaoke bar around 10 pm, Y/N's already tired, even if she's attempting to press on and make the most of her night. She giggles as she watches her friends scream the lyrics to songs by Queen and Fleetwood Mac, and she's particularly impressed by Nina's cover of "good 4 u" by Olivia Rodrigo, which she of course dedicates to Y/N.
With a few shots and two mystery cocktails under her belt, Y/N's actually having a good time. She excuses herself 10 minutes before midnight to go to the bathroom, not wanting to miss out on any of the excitement when the clock strikes 12. 
Only, when she's walking down the long hallway, her eyes on the floor as she navigates her slightly drunken steps, she bumps into a figure. A hard figure, wearing a fuzzy cardigan. 
And when she glances up, it's the last person she expects to see.
"Holy shit!" the curly haired brunette exclaims, pupils wide and breath smelling of tequila. It's clear that he's just as messed up as she is, if not a little bit more. "You're that girl from last year!"
She immediately giggles, the warmth of the alcohol in her system dismissing any embarrassment she may have felt otherwise.
"From that shitty house party, right?" she asks, thinking back to 2020. 
"Yes!" he shouts, slamming his palm against his forehead. "You helped me clean up that wine!"
"And you drove me home." she laughs.
"Oh my god, this is crazy," he declares, making Y/N laugh even harder, "Sorry, I'm kinda fucked, but this is still exciting."
"Why? We were both having awful nights last year and I could tell you wanted nothing more than to kick me out of your car."
"What are you talking about? You were the nicest person I met at that party," he replies with a slight wrinkle between his brows, "Plus, you were the best part, since you got me out of it."
Y/N snorts. A few people attempt to brush past them in the hallway and they both move to the side, leaning their shoulders against the wall. 
"I'm glad I could be of service," she says with a smirk. "What are you doing here tonight? Are you having a better New Year's?"
"I mean, I'm definitely higher and drunker this year," he cracks and it makes her roll her eyes playfully, "How about you? Feeling good?"
She allows the question to ping pong around in circumference of her brain. She was feeling good, but only because of alcohol, her friends, and the absence of her boyfriend. Taking a beat, she looks up at the green-eyed male before her, her breath catching in her throat when she realizes he's somehow gotten closer, likely because of all the traffic in the hallway. She swallows, her throat suddenly feeling dry.
"I'm feeling good," she finally answers, wringing her hands together in front of her.
"That doesn't really sound like a confident answer." he teases, crossing his arms over his chest. Her eyes flutter down to the tee-shirt he wears underneath the striped cardigan, the word sex scrawled simply across his chest. 
"I had a fight with my boyfriend before I came here," she admits, though she doesn't quite know why, "He knew about these plans for weeks and he just bailed to go play video games with his friends. I'm kind of pissed about it."
He hums and she notices that his jaw clenches slightly when he presses his lips into a line. She's not sure if it's from the drugs or something else, but she quickly glances back up at his eyes.
"Sounds like a dick move." he says decidedly. Y/N shrugs. 
"He's kind of a dick, to be honest."
That makes him bark out a laugh, shaking his head as his lips form into a half-hearted smile. 
"What do you need to turn your night around, then?" he asks, patting his pockets as he looks for something, "I have some more coke on me if you need to get inappropriately high. I'm also not against buying you shots at the bar, but given my inebriated state, I unfortunately can't be your Uber driver tonight."
"Do you always speak like a scholar when you're fucked?" Y/N mocks with a smirk.
"Maybe," he grins, "So what can I get you, New Year's stranger?"
It hits her then that they've never exchanged names. Not officially, at least. Y/N of course knew who he was — his name and face had spent the better part of 2020 being plastered across tabloids, and she recognized him back to his One Direction days — but it felt weird to just assume as much. 
Likewise, Harry wasn't above asking Gemma if she was familiar with the girl he'd met a year ago today. He hoped she may have some connection to her, given the fact that her silly little ramblings stuck around in his brain far longer than he would've anticipated. After Gemma asked around, he learned her name, but never did anything with it, instead opting for a year of distracted hookups and flings.
And even without acknowledging the fact that they each know the other's names, they're somehow more comfortable with being a New Year's stranger. 
"Can I bum a cigarette off you?" Y/N asks, remembering back to last year when he was chain smoking, somewhat pathetically, on the back porch.
"Haven't smoked for a year," he replies cheekily, "But I can ask a friend for one if you want."
She shakes her head. "I just need some air, really. Would you wanna take a breather with me?"
Harry nods and follows her out, eager to speak with her away from the crowded, loud interior of the bar. He can't help but check her out from behind, lips pressing together as he drinks in her thin slip dress, black tights, and platform heels. She looks cute. Similar to last year, just a tad more mature. It fits her, he thinks.
When they get outside, Y/N's ears are ringing, but her warm skin is enthralled by LA's sad excuse for winter weather. She instantly feels less clammy, leaning back against the brick exterior of the building and allowing it to cool her. Harry follows her lead, his mind spinning slightly as he continues to take her in.
"How've you been?" he finally asks, desperate to break the silence. She peeks an eye open and glances at him in her peripheral.
"Fine. Work's busy. Friends are good. Boyfriend's... there," she answers in short sentences, like she's checking things off. "You?"
"Just about the same, minus the boyfriend. Single as can be, actually."
Y/N hums. "Any shitty exes this year?"
"Not any official ones," he says, his nose wrinkling as he mentally runs through the year's rolodex of flings. "Can I ask why you're still with this guy if he's such a dick?"
She lets out a humorless laugh before shrugging her shoulders, a look of disarray twisting her features. 
"Your guess is as good as mine, stranger."
Harry turns to look at her, pressing his side into the cold brick building. "You don't have to torture yourself with him. If you're unhappy, you have every right to stand up for yourself and leave him behind. Life's too short."
"I know," she says, her eyes fluttering shut again, "I know."
"You deserve to be happy."
She smiles, but there's no happiness behind it. 
"You don't know me."
"You think it's a total coincidence we ended up meeting again, exactly one year later to the near hour?" Harry asks, halving the distance between them with a single stride, "This feels like fate."
"This feels like we're both fucked up on New Year's Eve." 
"Sure. But alcohol and drugs didn't get us here."
Y/N sighs. When she opens her eyes, he's right in front of her, so close she can see the lengthy wisps of his eyelashes. She swallows tightly, unsure of her next move or his intention. If she really cared about Mike, she would leave Harry here. If she didn't feel the mutual attraction to the man in front of her, she would go back to her friends. If she didn't wonder if he was onto something with this fate thing, she would forget this whole thing ever happened.
But she doesn't care about Mike, and she's attracted to Harry, and he's making her believe in fate.
"It's almost midnight, stranger," Harry breathes, and Y/N glances behind him to see people beginning the countdown from 10. "What do you wanna do about it?"
She knows what he's implying.
She's not drunk enough to view this as a mistake, but she's sober enough to want it.
8.
7.
6.
"Tell me what you want."
5.
4.
3.
"Kiss me," she exhales, her hands shaking at her sides, "Kiss me, please."
2.
1.
There's cheering and yelling and whooping from everyone around them. Cars are honking their horns, fireworks are going off in the distance, people are screaming happy new year. And with all the stimulation surrounding them, all she can focus on is Harry's lips on hers, wet and sloppy and still somehow so perfect. She kisses him back eagerly, teeth clashing annoyingly, hands exploring hips and backs and sides as they lick into each other's mouths, heavy and hot with lust.
She doesn't know how long they've been at it, clawing at one another on a public sidewalk in downtown LA. But she knows that eventually, someone stops to breathe and she takes it as an opportunity to step back. Harry's eyes flicker open, confusion and sadness radiating through the jade green, and she gives him a sorrowed smile in response.
"See you around, stranger."
She's gone before he can stop her.
. . .
New Year's Eve, 2022
"You're fucking joking, right?"
Maybe if Harry had glanced up from his phone two seconds earlier, he could've turned around and avoided this happening. But he's stupid, and he was too busy flipping through his mom's annual Christmas post on Instagram when he hears her voice, and he knows he's in for it. 
So he's not entirely surprised when the interaction ends as quickly as it began, just with a tequila soda staining his sweater from her angry drink throwing.
If he's being honest, he gets it. After last New Year's Eve, when they so intelligently decided to eat each other's faces in the middle of LA, gossip blogs and tabloids alike blew up. He felt awful — there were pictures of it everywhere and his fans were desperate to find out who she was. It wasn't a shock to him when they found her social media, job, and, worst of all, the fact that she was in a relationship with someone. 
Harry wanted to send flowers, bake her a million apology pies, and grovel on his knees to express how gross he felt about the situation. But instead, he figured it was better for him to stay away. He could only assume that continuing to bother her would make the situation worse, especially considering how cruel the internet could be.
Instead, it just seems like a sad, sick joke that they ended up at the same New Year's Eve dinner party.
When he agreed to come, he was completely unaware that his friend Lea was dating Alice, one of Y/N's oldest friends. They just moved in together a month back and decided to throw a small get together to ring in 2023. 
He wishes someone would've warned him that she would be here.
A year ago, he was in a different place. He was in deep with doing drugs and drinking to cope with stress after a busy year of nonstop work. He knows it wasn't an excuse for what he did, and while it took both of them to form that situation, his world was far more complicated than hers. Had it been any other person, it would've been a one-off hookup on New Year's Eve. 
With a sigh, his heeled boots carry him to Lea and Alice's kitchen, where he's eager to dry off some of the liquid that's sopping through the material of his sweater. Luckily, it's empty, the rest of the party meandering around the dining and living rooms as they wait for dinner to be served. He mentally curses Sarah and Mitch, who were supposed to accompany him tonight, but bailed last minute because their baby was being fussy. 
A shit excuse, if you ask him.
He's forced to rejoin the party when Alice announces it's time to eat. Harry's thankful to be friends with such excellent chefs, who have prepared an array of vegetarian, vegan, and meat dishes for every food restriction imaginable. When he sits down at his place setting, he's admiring the salad in front of him when he feels someone towering over him. 
"Alice, can I change my seat?"
Of fucking course.
He looks up to see her standing there, pinching her own name plate between her fingers with a less-than-satisfied expression painted on her features. His eyes follow her target, the brunette with a shag haircut holding Lea's hand, who sends a glare back her way.
"No. Just sit down, Y/N."
Silently, she does, though her actions seem far more petulant and childish than her lack of response. She doesn't exchange any words or throw any more drinks at Harry as she serves herself, though she also doesn't offer to pass any of the plates he's clearly reaching for, either. With a sigh, he allows her to avoid him, all the way through the toast when she refuses to clink her glass with his. 
The table settles in a baseline chatter, the sounds of multiple conversations filling Harry's ears as he scoops forkfuls of quinoa and asparagus into his mouth. 
"Can you stop chewing so loud?" she hisses at him, just loud enough for only him to hear. 
"Can you stop being so rude?" Harry fires back lowly, wiping his mouth with the cloth napkin, "I'm sorry for last year and I apologize for anything that came of it, but it's not fair for you to only blame me."
"My job fired me," she sneers and Harry's eyebrows shoot up, "And what did you get? More album sales?"
"No— no, I didn’t get anything from it, but— I’m so sorry, I had no idea—��
She rolls her eyes, suddenly standing from the table and pushing her chair in. Her heels clack against the wood floor as she steps away from the dining room and in the direction of the outdoor balcony. Immediately, Harry follows her lead, feeling Lea and Alice's eyes on him. 
Her back is to him, the doors shut, but he can tell she's exhaling smoke from the cigarette wedged between her fingers. Carefully, he twists the doorknob open and gently closes it behind him, his stomach gurgling with nerves. 
"I'm very, very sorry that your job fired you. I didn't know. I wish I did more. I thought about you constantly — I wanted to apologize but I didn't, and that's no fault but my own." he pauses to swallow but she doesn't look at him once. "It's not an explanation, but I was really drunk and high. Last year was... messy. And I should've known better, but I didn't."
She hums, as if in contemplation, as she takes another draw from her cigarette.
"You just... you took so much from me without even knowing it. I know it was both of us, but..."
"I know," Harry says, taking a step closer to her. "I can't express to you how awful I feel."
She shrugs. "It's fine, it's in the past. I just wanted… an apology, or closure or something. I didn’t know you wanted to offer that.” she takes a shaky breath. “I got a new job."
He resists the urge to say that's good, because in actuality, it isn't, and he's the reason why it happened to begin with. Instead, he bites his tongue, pinching his bottom lip between his fingers as she turns to face him.
"Are you still not smoking?"
He smiles gently. "Yes. No drugs either, this year. Maybe by the time we run into each other in 2023, I'll be totally sober."
"You don't seem like the type. Feel like every time I see you, you have a glass of wine or tequila in your hand."
He chuckles.
"To be fair, you've only seen me on New Year's Eve."
"Mm," she nods, stubbing her cigarette out with the heel of her boot, "Isn't that weird? All these years of being my New Year's stranger."
The nickname sets fire to his chest. 12 months later and he forgot that's what they'd started calling one another last year.
"It is weird," he nods, agreeing, "Almost seems like fate."
"Oh, we're not going down that road again," she snorts with a roll of her eyes, and it makes his own eyes crinkle in amusement. "If it was fate, we would've run into each other more. I think we just have mutual friends."
"That might be true. We only live 15 minutes away from one another."
She raises her eyebrows, "Really?"
"Have you moved since 2020?"
She shakes her head.
"Then yes. You live on Maple, I'm on Bleeker."
"That's three blocks over," she says, clearly bemused, "How did we seriously never see each other otherwise?"
Harry shrugs. "I mean, I guess I'm out of the city, like, 9 months of the year."
A silence blankets over them as she presses her elbows against the cool banister on the balcony, looking out to the city. Harry glances at the watch on his wrist. It's a few minutes past 10, just a few hours before the year ends.
"I'm sorry for throwing a drink at you." 
"It's okay. I deserved it."
Silence again. And then: "Would you ever want not be my stranger?"
Y/N tilts her head and looks at him with confused eyes.
"I mean," he pauses in an attempt to get his words together through his slightly buzzed brain, "Would you wanna know me outside of New Year's? Start fresh, maybe."
A gentle smile worms its way onto her face. It gives him a glimmer of hope.
"Remember what you said about fate?"
He nods.
"Find me any other day of the year," she says softly, stretching her arm out to pat his hand lightly, "If you do, it's fate."
. . . 
2023
Harry's having the most chaotic morning ever.
He slept through his alarm (something that rarely ever happens), got to his pilates class late, and completely forgot he has three early afternoon meetings with his record label. From the gym, he rushed over to the grocery store because he recently got home from tour and there's absolutely no food, and he has about 20 more minutes before his stomach starts growling embarrassingly loud. 
He's all but pushing old ladies out of the way with his cart, grabbing boxes of granola bars and bins of fresh fruit with no agenda in mind. Glancing down at his watch, he sees his first meeting begins in a half an hour, which means he'll definitely have to take it in the car over Bluetooth, considering traffic makes it near impossible to get places within a reasonable amount of time.
He's huffy, tired, hungry, and sweaty as he waits in line to check out. He's wearing his sunglasses inside like a douchebag, but he can't be bothered to take them off. He's also trying to be better about not distracting himself with his phone when he's in public places, so he decides to people watch and take stock of those around him: An elderly couple who are struggling to use self check-out, a woman who looks like she may be on one of the housewives shows on TV, and a girl that looks suspiciously similar to his New Year's stranger.
Only, when she turns her head, thanking the cashier with her bag of groceries in her hand as she walks out of the store, it hits him like a massive bag of bricks: It is his New Year's stranger.
Suddenly, nothing else in the world matters — not his cart full of snacks, his meetings, his empty stomach. He's jogging, damn near running to catch up to her, brushing past the morning rush of the supermarket as he tries to grab her attention. It isn't until they're out in the parking lot when he finally does it. Perhaps one of the more embarrassing things he's chosen to do in broad daylight, but he doesn't care, because it's her, and he's not letting her get away this time.
"Hey! Stranger!" he shouts, cupping his hands around his mouth to carry his voice against the parking lot. 
Almost immediately, she turns around, her eyes wide as she looks to see who the greeting came from.
And maybe it's just wishful thinking, but Harry doesn't think he's ever seen someone grin so beautifully when her eyes finally meet his.
489 notes · View notes
togenabi · 7 months
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apothecary diaries
vinsmoke sanji (opla) x fem!reader
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♡—you need peppermint for a salve you're making, but sanji bought all of it, and that's seriously not fair.
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word count♡— 3.7k
genre♡— fluff
content notes♡— opla sanji, afab!reader runs an apothecary and likes to make things, inaccurate chemistry for the sake of the story, mentions of flames in bottles, please do not do that, no use of y/n, not fully proofread
also on♡— ao3
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author's note♡— I love sanji sm he makes me cry. might be first in a series, but we'll see. please enjoy. xoxo, belle.
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The third time a pirate entered your shop, you genuinely considered closing up early today.
You level him with a stare despite the man being twice your size. You cut him off before he can get a word out.
“No, I don't have anything that works against people made of rubber.” Crossing your arms over your chest, you gesture to the rest of your wares. “Now, are you going to get anything else? Or should you be on your way?”
He leaves, disgruntled, but without a fight.
A huff escapes your lips. The nerve of these people.
Ever since that outrageous bounty for that new pirate came along, suddenly every pirate and pirate hunter in the East Blue was gearing up to chase after him. All the poisons that were gathering dust in your storage were cleared out within days of those posters showing up.
It was good berry at first, but they got more aggressive, and started demanding more of everything. More doses than you were comfortable handing out. More dangerous poisons that could kill everyone in the room if the seal loosens by even a crack.
You took up this apothecary business because you wanted to help people. It wasn't exactly your dream to become a poison dealer.
The shop bell rings again. Thankfully, this time it's one of your elderly neighbors and not a pirate seeking poison.
The old lady smiles at you, the sides of her eyes crinkling. “You seem to be quite busy these days, dear.”
“If only they were paying customers like you, Ma'am.” You pick up a box of loose tea from the shelf, already knowing her usual order.
She gasps in concern. “Oh my, did they steal from you?”
“Only my time.” You grimace slightly, remembering how many pirates barged in last week.
“Would you like some honey with this? We have fresh jars from today's shipment.” You offer as you tally her order.
The lady hums in agreement. “Yes, I think some honey would be lovely.”
During slow days like these, you like to tinker with new recipes to sell. On a desk at the very back of the shop, obscured by thick curtains, is your beloved workstation.
You review your notes from the previous day. You'll need to get some peppermint for the healing salve you're developing. Taking a small jar of the experimental paste, you test a small amount on your hand.
Indeed, it needs more peppermint. Maybe you should use extract instead of crushed leaves next time, so that the texture is smoother.
The problem arises when your go-to herb supplier says he's run out of peppermint.
“Please tell me you're kidding.” You groan, looking down at your sadly empty whicker basket.
“M’sorry, lass.” The vendor shrugs, not looking very sorry at all. “You just missed the guy who bought everything. I promise I'll get you your peppermint next week, though.”
Resigned, you sigh, reading through the rest of your shopping list. The salve, at least, can wait a week as it's still a work in progress. The rest of your list, however, are crucial ingredients for your usual bestsellers.
“Fancy looking lad. He asked about spices. Told him to go to the shops down by the river.”
Your stomach drops. Everything else you need are sold by those shops.
Mentally cursing that vendor, you run as fast as your feet can take you. You're not letting some tourist get the better of you when it comes to ingredients.
You reach the river in record time. You'd feel proud if you didn't feel winded. Even so, you scan the road for anyone matching the tourist's description.
There doesn't seem to be anyone remotely fancy around. Triumphant, you go on with your shopping.
You begin to feel better as you cross more things off your list. You've almost forgotten about the peppermint incident, if only you didn't suddenly smell so much of it pass by.
A tall blond man walks by, clearly doing a lot of shopping based on the boxes of supplies he's carrying. The scent of peppermint hits you again. In a paper bag, at the very top of the boxes, you spot bunches of those leaves you've been so desperate for.
You can only clench your jaw in frustration and frown at the back of his head. He purchases a large amount of meat and fish in the next stall, and you gather that he must be some sort of chef. No normal person buys so much meat that the shopkeep offers to deliver everything. But that's what happens to this fancy looking lad. He must not be normal then.
“Yes, my ship's in the docks. You can't miss it, thank you so much for your help.” He smiles. His blue eyes wander the stall, then travel to the next stall over, where you are.
There's a moment of surprise when he finds you already looking at him, but his expression changes instantly into a suave one. It almost makes you want to back away, but you stand your ground when he approaches.
“Aren’t you stunning? I was feeling tired, but your pretty face woke me right up.”
You turn away, pointedly ignoring him. He can't flirt with you while smelling like peppermint. It's just not fair.
“Sorry for the hold up, lass. What's it you need?” The shopkeep you were waiting for shows up just in time. You continue to not pay the blond beside you any attention.
“Cinnamon and salt, please.” You respond. “Pink, if you have any.”
“I'll have the same, good sir.” Fancy pants says. “Though, my salt doesn't need to be pink.”
As the shopkeep rummages through his supplies, the blond continues to speak to you. Why does he keep speaking to you?
“Pink salt is lovely to look at, same as you,” He begins, “But other than the color, there really isn't a difference to normal salt, isn't there?”
He shrugs, his broad shoulder shifting his suit jacket slightly. “You're paying extra for the same result. It's all the same when you cook it.”
“I'm not using it for cooking.” Is your only response.
The shopkeep returns before the stranger can reply. “Here's the salt for you's.” He hands you a bag of pink rock salt, and the stranger a bag of regular salt.
The dread from the peppermint vendor returns when you realize the shopkeep is holding only one bag of cinnamon. He pats it and says, “I could split it so you both get half.”
“I was here first.” You insist desperately. “Sell it to me.”
“...My hands are tied here, lad.” The shopkeep sells you the cinnamon, and it's quickly tucked into your basket when you get your hands on it. The stranger doesn't barter for it. Good.
And with that, you cross out cinnamon and salt from your shopping list. You were able to get everything except the peppermint, which stays neat and legible at the very top of the list.
You crumple the paper and toss it into a nearby bin before making your way back to your shop.
“Are you on your way to get some peppermint?” How did the stranger catch up with you so quickly?
“No.” No matter how much you wish you were.
You try to walk faster, but his pace is steady even with a large box under one arm and several others tied up with twine held in his other hand.
“But it was on your list.” He seems to be very interested in your dealings. Is he always this dedicated when he flirts?
You cross the bridge that arches over the river together. The townsfolk who recognize you and not the man next to you begin to whisper amongst themselves.
It takes everything in you to resist rolling your eyes. After a week of pirates, you suspect your shop will be full of gossiping neighbors soon.
“A certain someone bought all the best peppermint today.” Of course the scent of it wafts over you again as you say so.
“Ah.” Understanding dawns on his face. “I see, I'm sorry if that inconvenienced you.”
It was your turn to shrug. You were about to say that it was okay, but then remember that you wouldn't be able to complete your salve until next week.
You pout before you can help it. “Did you really have to buy all of it?”
He breathes out a laugh. “I normally wouldn't, but my friends tend to have endless appetites. It always pays to have plenty of supplies.”
Even in the middle of the bustling street, a certain group of strangers stand out. They're gathered outside the tavern. You don't know any of them, but you recognize one of them as that infamous new pirate with the exorbitant bounty on his head.
“Speaking of my friends...” The blond trails off, nodding towards that particular group.
You just about stop in your tracks. He's with them? He's a pirate?
Okay. A rich, flirtatious tourist you could deal with. A random pirate crew? You would probably still be fine.
But the crew with the highest bounty in all the East Blue? That's just asking for trouble to happen.
While the stranger is distracted by his friends, you slip into an inconspicuous alleyway. You'd have to go a little further around to reach your shop, but that's alright as long as you avoid those Straw Hat pirates.
Luck seems to not be on your side, though. Because fancy pants shows up to your shop later that evening.
He grins. “You didn't tell me crossing that bridge together meant something. I would have talked about something more romantic than peppermint if I knew.”
Of course, word travels fast in a small town. You should have known someone would tell him. And that he would be able to find you easily if he wanted.
“How does the legend go, again?” He asks teasingly. “If two people cross the bridge together on the day they meet... Theirs souls are bound.”
“It's a myth.” You dismiss his charming grin and try to ignore him.
He leans his elbows on the counter that separates you. He's hunched down, but still towers over you somehow.
“It's romantic. And I'm glad it happened to us.” He smiles. “May I at least know the name of the person my soul is now bound to? Mine's Sanji.”
“Well, Sanji. Are you going to buy something?” You ask and avoid giving him your name.
Sanji, surprisingly, nods. He grabs two cans of your special handmade tea and a large jar of honey.
“I'll buy these,” He places the items on the counter. “And give you this.” He holds out several sprigs of peppermint. You blink at him in surprise.
“...Thank you.” You gingerly take it, and carefully set it to the side.
You're silent while you ring up his order. It's when you're taking out a paper bag for him that you finally cave and reveal your name.
The smile that blooms on Sanji's face isn't how you expected it would be. You expected him to look arrogant, to look proud that he was able to sway you like he did other women before.
But he looks at you sweetly, dimples showing and eyes sparkling. You wordlessly hand over the paper bag.
“A pleasure, darling.”
You would have thought that would be the last time you saw Sanji. But, be it luckily or unfortunately, he finds you the next day with the rest of the Straw Hats tagging along.
Only this time, they seem to be on the run.
You hold open the door for the Straw Hats and, one after another, they flood into your shop. Sanji smiles and says something about your hair, but you can't process the words with his friends scattering to hide.
“Sanji, what the fuck?”
“I know, I know, love. I'm sorry we had to reunite like this. We just need to lay low for a bit.” He reassures you, caressing your shoulders as he does.
“I'll make it up to you! I'll cook you a romantic, candlelit dinner.”
You frown at him, unimpressed.
Sanji kisses his teeth and sighs. “I'll give you the rest of the peppermint.”
You perk up instantly. “Deal. You can all hide in my workstation.”
“Hi, I'm Luffy!” Their captain greets you jovially. “That's Zoro,” Luffy points to the swordsman. “Nami,” The woman. “And Usopp.” The one hiding under your counter.
“Of course, you know Sanji already, being soulmates and all.”
You trip on nothing, and Sanji grabs your hand to steady you. You glare. He just smiles.
“Your shop is really cool!” Luffy exclaims, looking at all the trinkets on the shelf.
“Thanks.” You say dryly, pushing the curtain partition aside. You lead them to the back of the shop.
“Make yourselves at home.” You wave a hand towards the couch and some chairs around your desk. They should be fine here as long as they don't need to stay the night.
Through the gaps in the window blinds, flashlights and shadows stream into the room. There seems to be an active search party out for these guys. You suddenly can't believe you agreed to this for peppermint.
Zoro, whose three earrings glint in the light, shifts to scratch at his chest. You spot bandages from the gap in his shirt.
You grab the small jar of salve from your desk and toss it to him. He catches it, but looks from the jar to you and back, confused.
“It's a healing salve I made. It should help soothe your skin.” You explain.
The swordsman still looks unsure, but opens the jar anyway. Zoro sniffs its contents, and tries putting a small amount on his chest.
You beam at him, unable to help feeling proud at how his shoulders visibly relax after using it.
“Thanks.” Zoro says simply.
“No problem.” You nod back, still smiling.
Luffy looks at the jar as if it's a miraculous cure-for-all. “That's amazing.”
“It smells really good, too.” Usopp says, sniffing at the air around Zoro.
“Do you sell that here?” Nami asks.
“I will, once I make more.” You answer. You never realized how uplifting it was to share your work with new people.
Subconsciously, you turn to Sanji. But, why is he frowning? You follow your gaze to find he's looking at the jar in Zoro's hand.
Before you can ask him if anything is wrong, Luffy bursts out excitedly, "You're a doctor! You should join our crew!"
You wince. “No, I'm a chemist.”
“Cool!” Luffy's enthusiasm does not wane. “So you can heal, right?”
You're about to correct him before they assume things out of your pay grade when Usopp claps his hands in realization.
“She's even better than a doctor!” Usopp insists. “She makes the medicine that the doctors give out!”
Just as you were about to interfere with how much they were overestimating your skills, the shop bell rings. You turn to the clock. Shit, you should have locked up twenty minutes ago.
You meet everyone's eyes and they all nod, understanding that they need to be quiet. You switch off the lights in the back room for good measure.
The customer is a pirate you've never seen before. He looks angry, glaring at every possible hiding spot in your shop. Particularly the room you just came from.
You're careful to completely shut the curtain behind you.
“How can I help you, sir?” You put on your best customer service smile. “I was just about to close the shop, but if it's urgent, I'll help you find what you need.”
The pirate grunts. He's not buying what you're selling at all.
“Perhaps some calming tea? You look like a refined gentleman who would enjoy this.” You hold up a can of tea as if that will help you seem less suspicious.
“What's behind the curtain?” He points behind you accusingly.
“My work area, where I make all the fine products you see before you.”
Stomping forward, he seems to have had enough of your stalling. Fine.
Just as he's about to bash his fist down onto your counter, you grab a suspicious looking dark jar. You hold it up threateningly.
“The hell is that?!” The pirate snarls.
“Haven't you heard? I'm the go-to poison dealer in all the East Blue.” You bluff. “A whiff of this, and you'll sink like a rock, my friend.”
He freezes, but glares at you more fiercely. You pretend to twist the lid.
“Y-you'll kill yourself too, then!” He barks back. “Let's see your bullshit poison then.”
“Oh, but that's what makes me so brilliant.” You grin, laying the act on thick. “I'm immune to all the poisons I make.”
Your hand settles ominously on the lid. “Shall we test who survives?”
The pirate scrambles to leave. He's out before you can blink. Without missing a beat, you lock the front door and draw all window blinds down.
You rest your back against the door. Letting out a loud exhale, you almost let yourself slide down to the floor. How long do you have to deal with pirates like that?
Thoughts of yesterday with Sanji at the market fill your thoughts. If only all days could be like that, where the worst of your problems had been a peppermint shortage.
“You guys can come out, now.” You call out to the Straw Hats.
“Uh... Is that really poison?” Usopp asks, staying very far away from the jar.
You laugh, though it comes out airy due to your tiredness. “No, those are just some herbs I left to ferment.”
“How brilliant of you, love.” Sanji is beside you in a few strides. Him and those long legs.
“Was he the one you guys were hiding from?” You ask. The crew members shake their heads.
“No, actually.” Nami says. “We were hiding from a bunch of—”
Your shop explodes.
Sanji is quick to pull you into his arms and shield you from the debris with his own body. For a minute that feels like eternity, you can't hear anything. Your ears are ringing, and dust clouds over all your years of hard work. You sob into Sanji's arms.
“No!” You cry out.
Marines step into the shop, wood planks cracking and glass panels shattering under their feet. There are so many of them. You don't understand. Even if you hid the Straw Hats here, they shouldn't be allowed to destroy private property, right? Right?
“We got a report of illegal poisons in the area.” The leading officer states, his face stoic. “Just our luck that we run into pirates as well.”
You look to the Straw Hats, all of them are positioned to fight, save for Sanji. He's still cradling you protectively.
Taking a shaky deep breath, you lift your hand to rest it on Sanji's arm. He instantly looks down at you, silently asking if you're alright.
You're not yet, and if you're being honest, you'd rather stay in his arms until everything is over. But you nod anyway. Sanji gently lets you go and gets ready to face your new enemies.
“Get them all.”
Chaos breaks, and you run to duck behind a shelf that toppled over. The Straw Hats put up a good fight, but there are just too many Marines. Your eyes find round bottles of herbs scattered around you, and you come up with an idea.
“Guys!” You yell. “Buy me some time!”
“Anything for you, darling.” Sanji winks at you before sending a Marine flying. You gape at his audacity. The rest of them don't even react, but you notice they rotate slightly, surrounding you to keep you from being interrupted.
Grabbing as many of the bottles as you can, you stuff them with shards of wood and more dried leaves. You take rocks from the debris and strike them together.
With a few sparks, the herbs and leaves catch fire. You act fast, throwing the bottles at the Marines.
The bottles shatter, bursting into flames once they hit their mark. The Marines panic and become disoriented, giving the Straw Hats an advantage despite being outnumbered.
Eventually, the Marines run and scatter, leaving only the few bravest of them to fight. The Straw Hats make quick work of them.
When the battle is over, you watch the dust settle over the ruins of your apothecary. It's going to take years to earn enough berry to restore how everything once was. You can't help but feel heartbroken.
Sanji sits down in the rubble next to you, wrapping you in another embrace. You let yourself fall into him.
“We'll help you get everything back. I promise.” He swears, voice slightly muffled into your hair.
“Or, you could come with us! Join our crew!” Nami hits Luffy on the shoulder.
“What? It's true!” Luffy insists. “We need someone like her!”
You pull back from Sanji's embrace to look at him. He doesn't say anything, but something tells you he wishes for you to come with them. The others look at you expectantly as well.
No one speaks to persuade you further. But when you compare this rag-tag team to your ruined apothecary, your answer suddenly feels very clear. If you're to slave away to earn the berry for rebuilding your home, why not spend that time with them?
The back of the shop is less affected, even if the sight is still dreadfully sad. Your notes are thankfully intact, and you're able to find a bag and shove some extra clothes into it. It saddens you that you're so quick to pack up your life, but you'll come back. Someday.
When you return to the others, they're all smiling. Sanji more so, but you should have expected that.
He holds out his hand, and you reach out to take it.
“I change my mind,” You jest. “I'll take that romantic candlelit dinner now.”
Sanji laughs loudly while he guides you to walk over the rubble safely. You catch some of the others laughing too, but they walk a ways ahead you and Sanji.
“Like I said,” He says with his signature grin, “Anything for you, my dear.”
Your mind must be playing tricks on you, because he still smells like peppermint. Now, that's really not fair.
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932 notes · View notes
callofdooty69 · 3 months
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cw: talk of alcohol, talk of vomit/throwing up, profanity, fem!reader
helping a drunk can get you dates
simon never got involved with women, mostly because he didn’t have time. every woman he tried dating wasn’t happy with the idea of him never seeing them because of deployment and needing to be on base most days. he was never in a relationship for more than a month.
that was, until he met you.
on a cold thursday night, him and the lads had just gotten done with their two-month-long deployment and went out to celebrate. they went to a local pub and soap ordered beers for everyone. simon wasn’t a huge drinker, afraid of the idea of becoming an alcoholic. but, mostly when he went out to celebrate, he had a few drinks. he could handle his alcohol well and wasn’t a light weight. his comrades on the other hand, were a totally different story, with the exception of price.
soap and gaz were fully wasted and could barely walk straight, making shitty jokes and laughing at each other when they fell. they decided to call it a night after soap nearly got a himself killed from bumping into a waiter and spilling drinks all over himself.
simon and price held up the other two drunks while trying to get back to base, struggling because they were barely lifting their feet off the ground. they definitely had a few too many drinks and price barely dodged gaz puking all over him.
as they stumbled along the concrete, ghost internally regretting parking so far from the bar, he saw you and your friends walking towards him. you were laughing, the only clearly sober one trying to guide your drunk friends and making sure they didn’t bump into anyone. your smile looked contagious, practically lighting up the snowy and foggy street.
you were inching towards them, trying to get your friends out of their way. you looked at him, showing a small smile as you passed. unfortunately, with the unlucky curse you both seem to carry around, soap vomited all over you before you got the chance to walk by. you tried your best not to show it, but you were freaking out a bit when you saw the puke all over your dress and heels.
“johnny?! the fucks a matter with you, mate?!” price shouted, scolding him. “holy shiiiiitttt,” gaz slurred, “why’d you do that man? you totally just ruined her niiighttt.”
“oh, don’t worry. it’s really not a big deal, this shit happens,” you smiled, trying to reassure them that you were okay, just a bit grossed out. soap let out a burp, “oh sorry lass, didaen’t mean ta!” he groaned.
“it’s really okay, i promise. just try not to puke all over anyone else tonight, yeah?” you smiled. “yes ma’am!” gaz and soap spoke at the same time, laughing their asses off and saying “jinx” and elbowing each other.
“okay, okay that’s enough. god, your gonna have a horrible hangover tomorrow,” price said, warning them. “sorry miss, i’ll see to it that ya’ get a new dress.”
“oh it’s okay! no need to,” you responded. you were desperately hoping it would wash out, you spent four paychecks on it. “have a good night, guys. get home safe!”
simon was surprised. despite the fact that some random scottish drunk just puked all over you, you didn’t even break your smile. he wouldn’t have had that self control, probably would have ended up socking him in the face if he was in your position. it was admirable, definitely something he would remember in the morning, if soap and gaz didn’t.
****
the next week went by in a blur. everyone was cleared off duty for a while, around three months, given the harsh conditions they faced during deployment and the numerous injuries that followed. price deemed that gaz and soap were strictly prohibited from alcohol consumption for the next three weeks, which the lads understood. other than occasional errands, nothing important went on, everyone mostly slept and hung out, trying to relax.
it was simon’s turn to go for the grocery run, seeing as having twenty or more soldiers on the same base would mean food went by quickly. as he stopped on the road and waited for cars to pass by, he flicked the remainder of his cigarette out the window and onto the street. looking out, he saw the walkway where the event from the previous week occurred. the memory flashed through his eyes and looked into the building that you and your friends came out of. he stared intently as he waited for the light to turn green, watching to see if anything interesting was happening inside.
and suddenly, as if you teleported out of nowhere, he saw you scribbling down an order on a notepad, an apron around your waist and that same bright smile on his face in a busy italian restaurant. it wasn’t until the loud noises of cars honking behind him that he put his attention back on the road, shaking his head and wondering what the hell was going on with him.
he used his knowledge to his advantage. he volunteered to go on the grocery runs for the following two weeks. he felt like a coward for not talking to you, and it had never been this difficult for him to talk to women. with his dumb luck, the lads caught on and made fun of him for it for weeks on end. it got on his nerves so much to the point where he just had to put an end to it.
he didn’t know how to, though. he remembered price talking to you about getting a new dress to replace the one soap idiotically puked on. simon figured he might as well get you new heels too, visualizing which ones they were and what to actually get.
money wasn’t the issue, his salary was pretty decent seeing as he was a lieutenant. the problem was being in a store that was filled with items that he didn’t know. it’s as if each piece of clothing and accessory was new to him, despite buying many of those gifts before for others. he hated how confused he was, why was he even doing this anyway? he could have just left and grabbed groceries like he was meant to. but it’s like he was tied to a rope that he couldn’t cut.
he finally found the dress and heels he was looking for after spending thirty minutes walking in circles. he purchased the items, requesting a bag and a note that read ‘sorry ‘bout the dress you had, hope this one can replace it.’ with that, he left and drove back to the restaurant where he saw you.
he stood outside the door, hesitating to enter. he might as well get it over with now, he wasn’t going to bring a dress and heels back to base knowing everyone would poke fun at him for it. he pulled the door open, hearing the faint jingle of bells as he let it close. he looked around, he had to admit the place was nice, surprisingly busy for it being only noon.
walking to the front counter, waiting for someone to come out front. he heard your voice in the back, telling him it would be just a minute until you could seat him. when you came out your eyes lit up, seeming to remember simon from the previous weeks.
“oh, hey! you were the man from a few weeks ago right? how are you?”
simon’s words were caught in his throat. he mumbled a small ‘good’ and handed you the bag of items. “is this for someone in the back? if you just gimme a name i can give it to them!” your smile widened, showing a glimpse of your seemingly perfect teeth.
“no, actually. s’ for you, a replacement of the dress ‘nd heels my drunk lad threw up all over. sorry if it’s not the right ones, tried my best to remember.”
your eyes went wide, smile slowly falling. he was worried he said something wrong, messed up what he got. but your smile quickly went back even wider than before. “are you serious?” he nodded in response. “you really didn’t have to, i told you guys it was okay!”
“no, it was his fault. if it makes ya’ feel any better, the lad was suspended from drinkin’ for three weeks.” your bubbly laugh returned, the corners of your eyes crinkling. “are you sure? this must’ve been expensive, it’s really no big deal-”
“i insist.”
“really? thank you!” you ran around the corner, standing on your tippy toes to hug the taller man in front of you. “you have no idea how much i appreciate this, unfortunately the puke didn’t wash out.” you rubbed the back of your neck, only then realizing how close the two of you were. you both apologized at the same time, laughing at the responses. a blush slowly crept up on your face, and simon was internally praying that you couldn’t see how red his was.
“well, i should probably get back to work, thank you again, this made my shitty week so much better.” you chuckled. simon knew he might not have the guts to talk to you again or see you, and unfortunately his mouth moved faster than his brain.
“wait,” he said as you turned around to smile at him. “are you free on friday? maybe we could grab a bite to eat. i’ll make sure no one pukes on ya’ again.” he laughed.
you were definitely not expecting the tall and hot military man you only had two encounters with ask you something like that. “yes” you said.
he wrote down his name and number and slid it across the counter to you, “great, then it’s a date.”
and with that, simon walked out the door and you went to grab the drinks you meant to bring out five minutes ago.
the both of you were smiling the rest of the day.
****
let me know if you guys want a part 2, and per usual, leave requests in the comments or anons if you’d like ╰(*´︶`*)╯♡
- 𝓀.𝒿
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chadillacboseman · 8 months
Text
The inspiration is inspiring this morning lads.
Send me some requests or something -
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"Fuck, V, please-" your legs are shaking, your mind on fire. You're so unbearably close, but it's not enough, "I need more."
Makarov ignores your pleas, instead flipping to a new file with a grunt. He's uncomfortably hard, barely able to control himself, but out to prove a point now.
"You can do it yourself," he retorts, a hint of cruel mockery dripping from the words, "I'm busy."
You almost pout, but you won't give him the satisfaction; instead, you roll your hips, the fabric of his jeans rubbing against your clit with just enough friction to make you whimper.
Your rhythm is erratic, made difficult by the way he's seated. You can tell he's enjoying the show, though, his dark eyes flitting over you with each pitiful sound that falls from your lips.
Makarov hisses some Russian curse under his breath, "Look at you, pathetic little thing-" he hooks a finger under your chin and brings your gaze to his, taking his bottom lip in his teeth with a groan at the sight of you.
"Tell me how badly you want it," he sneers, wolf-like teeth bared as if he's about to eat you alive.
"So bad," you choke out, nearly on the verge of tears, "please."
The file is tossed to the side, papers fluttering to the tiled floor in a careless heap. In one motion, he stands, bringing you with him and dropping you, rather unceremoniously, onto the table.
You watch, your mouth slightly agape, as he pulls his belt from his waist and brings your wrists together, binding them with the leather.
"We're going to do this my way."
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queers-gambit · 2 months
Text
Midsummer Night(mare)'s Dream
prompt: ( requested ) when Oliver's obsession reaches new heights, you fear Felix might return the affection - resulting in bloody flower petals suffocating you.
pairing: Felix Catton x female!reader
fandom masterlist: Saltburn
word count: 12.9k+
note: favorite trope here to stay
⚠️ you are responsible for the media you consume ⚠️
warnings: Hanahaki Disease AU: depiction of physical illness, medical phenomenon, blood, self-destruction; alcohol consumption, brief illicit material use and brief depiction of physical aggression, Lord's name in vain, cursing, angst, hurt and comfort, spoilers, AU timeline (obviously), "friends to 'strangers' to lovers", fix it Felix, "best friends" trope too, dead parents / family angst. requires maturity and caution.
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When the first semester at Oxford started, something in your gut twisted with an unknown anxiety. Something in the air churned, a tide was turning, and there was something deeply amiss that you just couldn't put your finger on.
Your roommate was kind, your grades average with those that took education seriously, and your professors were decently challenging but in a good way. You didn't know what was wrong, why you suddenly felt anxious, but then, after asking your best mate why he was late to class the day of his first tutorial, Felix answered, "Had a flat tire."
You nodded, handing him the joint as you sucked in a sharp breath to hold the smoke in your lungs, "So you booked it?"
"No, actually," he chuckled. "Nice bloke named Ollie stopped t'help, offered me his bike."
You laughed, smoke billowing out, "Yeah? Tellin' me he just stopped and gave you his bike? Come off it - nobody's that nice. You flirt with him or something, Fi?"
"No, no, I'm serious! That's literally what happened!" He nestled his arm around your waist, "No, seriously, listen, right, I was on my way t'class, on time and all, yeah? Got a flat tire on my way. This lad, Ollie - Oliver - comes down the path, stops, asks what's goin' on, said he was in my college, so, he offered his bike 'cause he'd get it later, said he'd wheel mine back and all."
"Fuck off!" You shoved your elbow into his ribs.
"You only think people are out to do the worst, darling," Felix chuckled, flashing you a blinding smile. Neither of you could anticipate the series of events that this interaction would kick off. "Besides, he saved my fuckin' arse, I got t'class with enough time, didn't I?"
"Hmm," you agreed, a knot forming in your stomach as he handed you the joint back; both stretched out in your dorm bed as the thunder storm raged just shortly after you got back from class.
Perhaps you were too much of a cynic. Perhaps you grew up in a rougher part of the city with considerably less money, being skeptical of gestures of kindness. Perhaps you only knew people to be disingenuous.
Maybe you were just used to hearing these incredible stories from Felix Catton - certified spoilt best friend.
You grew up together; meeting as young children because your parents worked for one of the Catton's companies, your fathers having been childhood best friends, joining you two at the hip. You and Felix were two halves of one whole, a single functioning organism; becoming inseparable. You were meant to be soulmates, you were so sure of it, but in reality, it felt reassuring to have such a strong friendship that you never entertained the idea of romance.
Felix's friendship was genuine. It was built-on everyday, growing, evolving, forever changing to accommodate both your changing personalities. He accepted you for who you are, and it felt like he chose you everyday. Where others came and went, you remained. Where others abandoned you, there he was. There was no you without Felix and no Felix without you, and when the time came, you chose to attend Oxford together.
You knew how easy life was for him. You knew the silver spoon he was fed from. You knew he was the flame moths were drawn to.
Knowing Felix Catton was power-by-association, and you watched an endless slew of people come and go with the snuffed-out dream of being in his inner circle. You protected Felix (and the Cattons) from leeches and Felix protected you from, well, everything else. You were meant to be soulmates, you were so sure of it, and then everything changed the summer before senior year of secondary school when you moved in with him permanently.
Summer had just started, you were only two months away from turning 18, and then, a drunk driver drove your mother and father into a tree on the side of a road. There was nothing to be done when your parents were finally found, the EMTs assuring you they were dead on impact and did not suffer. You had been at home with Felix, who let you paint his toenails, the house phone ringing shrilly.
"Hello?" He answered for you, reporting your family's surname's residence. He hummed, then paused, looking at you. "It's St. Luke's Hospital, love?" Felix handed you the phone with curiosity.
When you reached for the landline, the nurse reported you were needed and asked if you had the means to get to them. You begged to know what happened, but all she said was, "There was an accident."
Felix drove you to the hospital.
Felix held your hand when you were lead to a private room, meeting a set of police officers.
Felix held you when you stumbled in shock upon being shown your parent's demise and Felix held your hair when you threw up after identifying bodies.
And the Cattons stood with you when the man responsible was sentenced to life in prison. They stood in the rain when you tossed two stones in the stream.
You lived with him from that moment on and sometime after, you accepted how in-love with him you were. He had always taken care of you, but that summer, he took care of you; being the glue that kept you together, the binding force that brought you into being, the reason you didn't waste away, give up, or lose yourself entirely.
When your final year before university began, you had to stomach the idea of loving him at a distance. He'd always been popular, charismatic, the sun at the center of everyone's galaxy that pulled all towards his warmth and light. But after losing his virginity at age 15, Felix was constantly running through partners and you didn't want to interrupt his "sexual awakening" despite the knife to the gut each girl stabbed. So, you kept your feelings to yourself and tried your hardest to be a staple in his life, and when you chose to attend Oxford, you made peace with the idea that you'd go another 4 years in silent denial.
Something about Oliver's little act of kindness just made you uneasy.
And then, the following night, Felix spotted his new little friend when you were out at the local pub and invited Ollie to sit at the table with you lot. You sat between Felix and Farleigh, India on your friend's other side - his cousin something akin to your own flesh and blood. After all, you had known them all for two nearly decades; marking you as one of the very, very few who could put Farleigh in his place. Eerily, you both shared a look of mild distain, but for very different reasons.
You didn't think yourself a jealous woman, but after meeting Oliver Quick in person, hearing him speak, watching him watch Felix, and witnessing how he interacted with everyone else, you grew uneasy in his presence. The night you met him officially, there was a funny tickle in your chest, and after a few too many coughs escaped, Felix whipped around at you instantly. "You gettin' sick, darlin'?" He asked, words drenched in genuine concern.
Oliver thought it was curious to use a pet name for a pretty girl while a different one was sat on his lap.
"I'm good," you assured, thinking the rain caused this reaction.
But as the night wore on, you coughed more and more. When Oliver got up to get the next round of shots, Felix, ever the sweetheart who had money at his disposal, scolded Farleigh for instigating the poor boy and stood with a note in his hand. Only you saw the real interaction of Felix subtly paying for the drinks, and when he returned, he set a glass of water in front of you.
He made sure you didn't drink the rest of the night, but you didn't want to - starting to feel unwell. "Fi, I'm gonna go - "
"Oh, no, love, c'mon, an hour longer," he pleaded as you stood. But he paused, examined your face, then standing without another word and tossed his arm around you, announcing to the table, "Right, we're off."
He ignored the jeers and complaints because he was swiftly escorting you away, and only when Farleigh clocked this did he scold the table to shut the fuck up. When you stepped outside, Felix was turning to you instantly, holding your cheeks in hand and using his thumb to wipe at the corner of your mouth.
"You're bleedin', love," he muttered, showing you his hand. You frowned and wiped the area yourself, seeing the crimson stain on the pads of your fingers. "Fuck. All right. C'mon, we can get you to the infirmary - "
"No, I don't think it's - "
"You've been coughin' all night and now you're bleedin'," he snapped, shushing you, "we're goin'!" When you just stared at him for a moment, he sighed, "I-I'm sorry, that was a bit more aggressive than needed. I'm just worried, love, you shouldn't be coughing blood."
"Might've just been smoking too much, yeah?"
Felix spoke your name with a hardened edge, staring at you for a long moment as neither of you wanted to back down. Finally, he cracked, "You're not gonna go, are you?"
"Nope. C'mon, I'm tired."
"Well, I'm stayin' the night incase you throw up," he declared, giving in and leading you towards your dorm.
"No, go back - "
"Not leavin' yah, love," he refused. "So, c'mon, tell me," he changed the subject, "what'd you think of Ollie?"
You sighed, "Nice enough lad, I guess."
"Told you," he grinned, weighing your heart to your feet.
For nearly every instance there after, you dreaded hearing Ollie's name or seeing him pop up at events. But that first night, as Felix dozed off in your bed, you were set on your knees, dry heaving in vain to free your throat from whatever suffocated you internally. When you managed to trigger your gag reflex, a stream of alcohol came spewing out - dotted with long, pretty, bright yellow petals.
You stared into the toilet, blinking in shock.
You always thought Felix was the human equivalent to a golden retriever with the disposition of a sunflower. In fact, there grew a small patch of sunflowers at Saltburn just for you; you and Felix planting them one summer together, kept alive after your parents died to bring you a little sunshine when you felt overwhelmed with storm clouds. After all, they were your favorite flower... Now being hacked out of your lungs in a ghastly, tacky mixture of blood, clots, and mucus.
As the year went, you didn't have another episode, but still did any and all research you could on your current phenomenon, wanting to avoid the hospital if you could.
The year flew by without much of a hitch, outside of Felix snapping on Ollie and distancing the lad from the group. However, just before exams, Felix came to you in need of help; saying Ollie's dad died, and being as he had both parents, he wasn't sure how to comfort the lad. It struck a nerve deep within you, going with Felix to talk to Ollie, and by the end, your arm had slung around the scholarship boy in pity, trying to talk him through part of his grief.
You didn't know the lad did his research on you and discovered you lived with Felix in his grand fucking castle because you were orphaned just before turning 18. It was the perfect "in", in Ollie's mind; a way to weasel close to you, solidifying himself to Felix.
You didn't like Ollie, he still made you feel uneasy, but you did pity him enough that you tolerated him. Now more than ever. He was back in the group before the day was done.
However, when exams concluded, Ollie was acutely aware that Felix attended the celebration to your exams - dressing you, pinning you for your accomplishments. You dressed and pinned Felix after his. And you both showed up for Ollie's exams, though, you dressed and pinned Farleigh as Felix did Ollie. He supposed it counted, still having the object of his desire back in sight; within his reach; staring at him with pride and a hint of pity.
It was exactly what Oliver wanted.
"Well, aren't you gorgeous?" Felix complimented when you arrived in the courtyard, dressing for the end-of-year ball. He stooped down to wrap you in a hug, giving a spin, and setting you on your feet as you laughed at his usual antics. "Absolutely a vision, love, seriously," he praised. "And I have a li'l something for us, hey?" He held up the champagne bottle.
"Christ," you mused, "what's the occasion? They'll supply cocktails there, Fi - "
"We're going to a funeral."
"I'm sorry?"
He sighed, handing you the bottle to dig in his trouser pocket and revealed a stone painted with the word, 'Dad'. Felix looked sheepish, "I thought we could do it for Ollie, yeah? Lad's had a real rough go of it all - "
"I think that's a nice idea, Fi," you cut him off, smiling in assurance, opening the wire on the bottle. "But first, a toast," you proposed, "to the start of summer."
"And end of exams," he agreed, taking the bottle back when you handed it over and popping the cork. He cheered as you drank first, taking his own, wrapping you in a tight hug. "We survived," he laughed, sighing after. "Really glad you were here with me through it, love."
"Yeah, me, too," you whispered, holding back creeping bile when your heart began to pound with harrowing tension. "All right, pretty boy, c'mon, sun's setting."
"Right," he pulled back, "I told Ollie to meet us in the courtyard."
"Which one?"
"C'mon," he laughed, taking your hand and leading you after him. You danced after him on your tip-toes, avoiding using your whole shoe and the high heel that elevated you off the ground several inches. "Easy, watch it, careful now," he teased.
"Hey," Farleigh greeted, watching you two go with a smile.
He bet Venetia that this was the summer you two got together. Felix had confided in him that he was considering the idea of settling down, having sowed his wild oats and being tired of running through girls like he had this past year. Farleigh never thought he'd hear such words from Felix Catton, but after seeing you and his cousin running off, he knew, it was only a matter of time before confessions were made.
"There he is," You pointed.
"Ollie!" Felix called, both of you jogging up to him. "Hiya, mate."
"Hey," He greeted you both as Felix didn't stop.
"C'mon, then! Follow us!"
Upon arriving at a stone bridge that passed over a thin stream, you let Felix explain what you were doing and why you were there. "So, in my family, we have this tradition, right? When somebody dies, we write their name on a, er, on a stone," he showed Ollie the stone he made, "and we chuck it in the river. My great-grandfather started it when his son died in the war. We've only done it for Y/N's parents and my dog so far, but... You know, I don't know, I just..."
"It helped, a bit," you filled in when Felix looked at you. You took the stone from Fi's hand and handed it to Ollie, offering, "Felt like our own private goodbye."
When Oliver took the stone and looked it over, Felix anxiously excused, "This feels a bit fucking stupid now."
"No. It's not stupid," Ollie insisted sincerely - only looking at Felix, like the whole world did. "Thank you."
"It's something, right?"
This lead into Felix explaining "what to do", Ollie taking a moment after. When he looked over, he saw Felix had positioned you in front of him, arms wrapped around your neck to keep you close, both screwing your eyes shut in prayer. It would've been endearing had this been an honest memorial...
When the stone was throw, it clattering into the mud on the embankment... A foreshadow you should've paid more attention to. This lead into you three sitting on the stone bannister, skipping the ball, sharing the champagne, and after learning about Ollie's poor living arrangements, for Felix to invite him home with you two. To Saltburn, setting in motion a series of unfortunate events.
That night, you stayed in Felix's dorm, asking, "Are you sure about this?"
"Hmm?"
"Ollie - coming home with us?"
"Oh, yeah, love, it'll be fine," he promised. "Gives us one more person in the house, that's never bad, is it?"
You couldn't answer, you didn't know.
Your first night home was memorable in the sense that Venetia, Felix's older sister, insisted on 'girls night' and locked you both in her room. "So? Did you tell him yet?" She rushed with an excited grin, pouring you both a glass of wine. "Farleigh and I have a bet goin' - "
"Tell who, what?"
She glared, "Don't play coy. You're in love with Felix!"
"Venetia!"
"Oh, shove off, I won't tell him - but does that mean you haven't either?"
"If I did, you honestly think I'd be here?"
"Well, yes - "
"He doesn't feel the same," you insisted, "and if I tell him, he wouldn't want me here anymore, it'd be awkward."
"You're absolutely insane if you think any of that is true!"
"Ven."
"He's mad for you."
"He say that?"
"Well, no, but I can tell."
"It's not gonna happen," you sighed, shaking your head. "Not with all his interests, and those interested in him," you explained bitterly.
"I think you should tell him," she nodded. "It wouldn't hurt to tell the truth, but it might give you both some relief. I promise, he doesn't want you out of his life, so, even by the off chance he doesn't feel the same, he'd still want you around. Oh, know what would be romantic? Writing him a note! You've always been a talented writer."
By the end of the bottle, you and Venetia had started drafting a letter; confessing your feelings and coming up with the grand idea to ask him to meet you in the maze if he felt the same. It was where you both went when wanting solidarity, being a place of worship for you both. The center of the maze was remote, private, being where your tears could be shed and secrets shared.
It felt fitting to meet there.
Your letter wasn't perfected to your standards until Ollie arrived. His first night, you began to feel that tickle in your chest again, and for some reason, you mistook this for 'butterflies' and decided tonight was the night. So, you snuck into Felix's room before dinner, knowing he was already out, and left your note on his bed; unaware that Oliver was watching through the crack in the bathroom door.
He slithered in when you were done, slowly approaching the bed, and fingering the letter. He plucked it in hand, opened the unsealed envelope, and read your confessional; requesting, that if he even had an inkling of returned affection, he'd meet you after dinner, in the maze. At the center, beneath the Minotaur statue.
Ollie stared at your flourish of a signature and instantly crumpled the letter, surging back into his room and shredding it into bits. He swept them away into the waste bin and adjusted his jacket.
"There you are!" Felix smiled, finding you in the hall. "Don't you look nice, darlin'."
"You always say that."
"I always mean it," he grinned, escorting you to the dining room.
Dinner was... Interesting, to say the least.
You were distracted by nerves only Oliver clocked, Venetia giggling and Felix the center of attention - as usual. He reached out a few times to grab your thigh, asking muttered questions in your ear, making sure you were all right after he noticed you had barely eaten. Oliver had to hide his amusement as you just seemed anxious, and when dinner was ended, he watched you scurry from the room as if the Devil was at your heels.
"Oh, is my darling girl all right?" Elspeth asked in concern.
"She had a lot of wine," Farleigh smirked.
"Ah, yes," Mrs. Catton waved off, and Felix stood from the table shortly after.
Oliver stalked by the windows that evening, catching sight of you, still in your evening gown, cutting through the mist to head into the maze. He smirked, hearing Felix in his room - but then catching sight of Venetia through a different window. A different part of his plan roared to life that night; meeting the sultry sister under the moon, both knowing you were waiting in the dark for Felix.
You paced in the cold. Your dress drug through the grass, bare feet tickled.
The hour drug by slowly. You lit another cigarette, watching the mouth of the maze.
The second hour rushed by. Your stomach knotted.
Three, four hours ticked by. And you were left standing alone, in the middle of the maze, coughing and wheezing.
You dropped to your knees when your ailment turned physically violent; fingernails digging into the mud as you choked and heaved, trying in vain to clear your throat. When you stuck your fingers down your throat, you threw up bile, dirt, acid, wine, and long, bright yellow sunflower petals - sobs soon wracking your entire being.
He didn't come... He didn't come. He didn't come.
You threw up twice more, blood staining your chest and dress; teeth outlined in red, the dewy taste of pollen left on your tongue. You sobbed until your head hurt, and sobbed some more; confusion and heartache taking over. When you managed to find your feet, you felt lighter, thinner, smaller, less of yourself than you have ever before.
A piece of you had officially cracked away, being spewed into the mud and grass at the base of the Minotaur statue.
When venturing back to your room, you gasped when you nearly smacked into Duncan. You stared at one another in mild shock, his eyes taking in your state and you quietly begged, "Please... Don't say anything to Sir and Mrs. Catton. I don't want them t'worry until I know what's wrong. I-I'm going to the doctors, Duncan, please, give me time to figure this out."
He nodded sadly, shocked by the blood left behind. The following morning, he didn't wake you... He let you sleep, demanding you be left alone to the waitstaff. When Elspeth questioned your absence at breakfast as Ollie entered the dining room, Duncan was heard, "Miss L/N was up early this morning, went for a run. She went back to bed, said she didn't sleep well."
"Oh, the poor darling," Sir James Catton tutted.
"Morning," Ollie greeted, careful not to let his excitement show over your empty chair beside Felix. Venetia was staring at her brother in near anger, confusing him, but distracted instantly by Oliver's arrival. Sir James greeted him first, Venetia followed, and Felix invited the lad to help himself to a meal.
You had sobbed the whole night, puking bits of blood as the flower petals tightened your windpipe; the tackiness making them stick like glue. You didn't know what to do - there was no way you could face the Cattons now, not after Felix surely told them that you would leave Saltburn (for good) soon.
But sometime after breakfast, there was a knock at your door.
"Come in," you bid quietly, debating if you should start packing or not. When Felix entered, he was holding a bouquet of sunflowers, smiling softly.
"All right, love?"
"What?"
He chuckled, "I'm asking if you're all right, we missed you at breakfast."
You just blinked stupidly, "Uh, y-yeah, guess I am."
"Good," he chirped, approaching you and handing over the flowers. "Got these for you, thought maybe you could use a bit cheering up?"
"Why would I...? Felix, is there - is there anything you want to say to me?"
"Uh, no? Not really, I mean, I was gonna see if you fancied coming with us to the field?"
You stared at him in confusion. "You... Don't want me to go?"
"Go? Go where?" He laughed, "Cause yes, I'd like you to go with us... To the field? I just asked you - you sure you're feeling all right?"
"Um, y-yeah," you swallowed thickly, petals peeling back down your throat. "Thank you, for these," you accepted the flowers.
"Figured, with your parent's anniversary comin' up, should keep you close, you know?"
You shook your head, "Wasn't even on my mind, Fi..."
"And I just put it there, Christ, Felix, fantastic job," he cursed himself, hand through his hair in stress. "I'm sorry, love, I didn't mean - "
"You didn't, it's fine - I-I mean, I'm fine," you assured, trying to stave off tears. "Actually, Fi, I'm feeling a bit tired, think I'll nap."
"Duncan said you were?"
"No, no, I didn't get back t'sleep," you nearly whispered, needing to clear your throat again. "You lot have fun, I'll find you later."
"Sure? 'S Ollie's first time," he taunted. "Don't wanna miss that, do yah, love? And we're reading The Half-Blood Prince together, can't miss that."
"I'll catch up tonight, promise," you nodded, "just tell me what chapter you get through."
Felix stared at you, reaching to pinch your jaw and pet his thumb down your cheek. He whispered, "Sure you're all right?"
You nodded, shaking off his touch, hating how easy it was to fall in love with him. "Just tired, pretty boy. Promise."
"All right, well... Find us later, yeah?"
"'Course."
But you didn't leave your room for three days, unable to control the vomiting spells, the blood, the pain, the petals... The gutwrenching heartache. Venetia checked on you damn near every other hour, sitting, resting your head in her lap, stroking your locks in comfort as you sobbed.
"Tell me what's happening?" She begged, unable to get it out of you yet. But you felt another wave, jumping from her embrace to rush into the restroom; sliding on your bruised knees in front of the toilet. She followed, and like her brother's done many times, gathered your hair to hold back. "Jesus fucking Christ!" She gaped, seeing the blood and long, bright yellow petals. "Are those - what the fuck is that!?"
You heaved greatly, throat shredding as blooms and stubby stems cut up your esophagus. When you stared at the devastatingly beautiful blooms coated in your blood, floating atop of the water, you looked up at your friend and confessed, "I'm in love with your brother."
"I know, babe - "
"And he doesn't feel the same," you sobbed; breaking down, panting for breath, Venetia dropping to your level to pull you into her chest. "I-I-I left him the letter, Ven, I-I-I asked him to meet me..."
"He didn't show?"
"I waited hours!" You wailed, finally breaking down after the past couple of years caught up to you. "He never came! An-And then, he shows up with flowers - with fucking sunflowers! - acting as if he never saw my letter! Acting as if he didn't know! Like - Like it's easier to ignore than confront!"
"Oh, sweet girl," she whispered, gently rocking you both as you couldn't catch your breath.
Neither of you attended dinner that evening. Felix showed up again, like he had everyday, asking if you were hungry while holding a plate of toast and mug of tea. But you had passed out in Venetia's arms, the fake blonde waving her brother away, doing her best not to snap at him - remembering she made you a promise that she wouldn't interfere. You feared if she got involved, you really would be asked to leave Saltburn and you had nowhere else to go.
The following morning, you were up before Venetia.
"Hey," she grunted, stretching in your bed after spending the night. "You all right? What're you doing?"
"Goin' for a run," you answered, lacing your trainers.
"How do you feel?"
"Well," you sighed, "pretty fucking foolish, but it's summer. Yeah? Best not to dwell on what I can't have..."
"But it's killing you, love," she sat up.
"I'll get over it," you assured, not believing yourself. "If he can act as if nothing's happened, so can I. Do me a favor, though, love?"
"Anything."
"Sit between us?"
She frowned, watching you head out of the room. When she peered from the window, she saw you setting off around the ground and flopped back into bed for another hour.
"Oh, there you are!" Elspeth gasped when you entered the dining room that morning - jetting out of her chair. "Oh, darling, are you all right? Gave us a fright - thought you were sick or something!"
"Just a wee stomach bug, I promise," you accepted her embrace.
"I'm glad you've joined us," she whispered. "Felix has been dreadfully annoying."
"I can hear you, Mum," Felix groaned when you two pulled back. "Ven, hop down one," He told his sister.
"No, no, stay put, love, I can sit here," you assured the siblings, taking the seat on the other side of the sister.
Felix frowned instantly. "Don't think I've ever seen you two sit apart all these years," Sir James teased, reaching to pat your hand. "Good to have you join us, darling."
"Thank you," you whispered, Duncan placing a plate before you.
"How come she's served?" Ollie wondered without thinking.
"Miss Y/N has been unwell," Duncan replied stiffly.
"Oh, tell the truth, Duncan," you smirked, "I'm just your favorite."
It spurred the family on, Farleigh offering you a look of confusion from across the table. You waved him off, not once looking to your left at Felix - only ever answering Venetia by looking directly at her, avoiding her brother.
Felix felt something in his gut shift as you avoided him more and more. Venetia all but moved into your room, or you into hers - not wanting you alone in this time of duress. Meaning, each time Felix tried to get you alone for questioning, his sister was driving him away. When hanging out as a group, you no longer were at Felix's side, but opted for Venetia and Farleigh's.
It left a gaping hole for Ollie to fill - happily.
"Did I do something, you think?" He asked Oliver one day, floating in the lake, watching you braid Ven's hair as she read from her copy of The Half-Blood Prince.
"No, just maybe," Ollie shrugged, "it's, I don't know, girl stuff?"
"I'm her best mate, she never avoids me like this," Felix frowned. Oliver hated how genuinely hurt Felix sounded. "Seriously, what did I do?"
"I couldn't say, mate. Maybe just let her cool off, come to you when ready," he advised, watching Felix nod sadly and stare at you from behind his sunnies. He craved Felix's attention that you so effortlessly warranted.
You didn't sit with Felix during movie nights anymore, opting for the furthest seat on the floor at Sir James' feet. You didn't spend the night in his room once, nor let him into yours. You weren't on his tennis team. You didn't share sunbeds.
You no longer met for midnight swims, something that made Felix explicitly sad. He waited with his feet in the water, but this time, you were the one who never showed up.
You didn't sit with him at meals, making his family acutely suspicious. Yet neither of you seemed at odds - so, what were the truly worried over? You acted as if there wasn't a thing wrong, but they all noticed the sickly state you took on.
You thinned out, you barely ate a fourth of your meals, you went on runs as often as you could - even in the sweltering heat. You barely slept, creating bags under your eyes, dull, lifeless hair, and a concerning docile attitude. It was as if you were haunting the castle, barely visible, making yourself into a shell of who you once were.
You simply weren't yourself and the Cattons had no idea how to help. Elspeth sent tea to your room. Sir James let you pick movies for family movie nights, but you never seemed interested. Farleigh tried to engage you on the daily, but nothing seemed to register. Even Oliver put on a show by approaching you at the lake, sitting beside you, trying to strike a conversation.
"Sorry, Ollie, I was about t'go for a run," you eased.
"Been goin' on a lot of those. Want company?"
"No," you refused.
"Sure it's a good idea?" He asked. "Been throwing up a lot, might make it worse."
This made you freeze from where you had stood, slowly turning to look down at him. "Excuse me?" You seethed. "You spying on me?"
"I can hear yah sometimes," he nodded. "You're hiding it from the others, aren't yah? The blood, the tears... The way you're wasting away?"
From a short distance, Felix recognized the angry look and body language you wore. Slowly lowering yourself, you hissed to Ollie, "You keep your fucking mouth shut or I'll make sure you're on the first train back to fucking nowhere tomorrow morning. Hear me? You don't know shit about a Goddamn thing, you don't fucking know me, and if you're smart, you'll shut the fuck up, Oliver."
He watched you with a small smirk; standing over him before vacating the lake's shore.
That night, Oliver heard moaning from the adjoining bathroom. Upon his 'investigation', he spied Felix in the clawed-foot bathtub; steam wafting from the water, sweat beading down his skin, and bicep pumping vigorously as he pleasured himself. But what infuriated Oliver was the subtle, nearly slurred and unintelligible moan of your name from Felix's mouth. It seems, despite his best effort to drive a wedge between you two, there was lingering emotion that neither knew what to do with.
You were withering away, and Felix was self pleasuring to you.
Oliver had to up the ante, but how? You avoided the Cattons on a rotating basis - not letting any of them too close to figure out you were devastatingly ill, except Venetia. And the sister wasn't about to spill this darkening secret of yours, she was loyal to a fault.
Only Oliver seemed to know this dark little tale, figuring Felix hadn't even admitted his feelings for you to himself. Perhaps why he found relief in the tub, releasing into the water with a tear falling from his eye over the idea that you no longer wanted to sustain a friendship. It was all terribly confusing for the summer residents at Saltburn. And yet, in an effort to feel closer to Felix than you ever had, Oliver climbed into the draining bathtub and slurped Felix's cum as if it were water from The Holy Grail.
It made him feel superior. It made him feel as if he were winning an endless race. Made him feel like he was validated in pushing you out in favor of himself - no matter the history between you and the Cattons. Made him feel like he was solidifying himself amongst the distant royalty and you were giving reason to be thrown out of Saltburn.
But he would underestimate the power of family.
He got a little too cocky the night he met Venetia outside, in the moonlight, with Farleigh watching from his window.
The following morning, there was a pounding at your door - a rare night Ven didn't sleep with you. When you opened the door, Felix came pushing in, looking purely distraught.
"Look, I know you're pissed at me for whatever reason - but I fucking need to talk to you, okay? Please - I-I feel like I'm about to lose my mind, Y/N, love, please - "
"What's happened?" You asked, shutting the door. "I was about to head out - "
"Please, love! Please!"
"Christ Almighty, all right, the fuck's goin' on with you? Hey? Looks like you're gonna give yourself a stroke," you approached him, caressing his bicep. "What happened?"
"He kissed her."
"Come again?"
"Fucking Ollie - Oliver! He fucking kissed Venetia!"
"When?"
"Last night, Farleigh saw them."
"Oh, love, c'mon, you know Farleigh doesn't like Ollie."
"So, he's lying? You think he's lying?"
"I didn't say that, but you're all worked up. C'mon, just breathe for a minute, gonna pass out from the way you're huffin' and puffin'."
"Please, be serious! This is serious!"
"I know it is, I'm just trying to be rational."
"So, Farleigh's lying."
"Well, I don't think so - kinda a huge lie t'tell, innit?"
"I thought so," he snapped, hand through his hair in anxiety. "I-I mean, how could he? How could Ollie do this - I-I mean, my sister? My fucking sister?"
"Love, if you're this worked up, just go talk to him," you tried. "Ask Ollie point-blank what happened."
"Would you ask Venetia?"
"No, darling, that's not how this works."
"Well, how will we know who's lying? Farleigh or Ollie?"
"I don't know - is this even something to lie about? What did Farleigh say?"
"He saw them - tonguing - practically eating each other!"
You sighed, "Love? You're not gonna want t'hear this."
"God, what?"
"Venetia's a big girl, she can tongue and eat who she pleases."
"It's bad form, though, innit? I mean - he's my friend, my guest, here under my invitation, and he gets with my sister?"
You shrugged slightly, "I don't know, Fi, but she's allowed to do as she pleases; Ollie, too. It's not like either are dating someone, hey? What? You jealous? Of your sister?"
"Fuck off with that, know that's not it," he snapped again.
"What is it, then?"
"It's another Eddie situation!"
You sighed, "Fi... You can't horde people, right? Ollie bein' here, he's free game to you, Farleigh, Ven."
"And you?"
"Fuck no, lad gives me the creeps," you blanched.
"Still?"
"Yeah, fuckin' still. Call it intuition, but there's something off, Felix. I know you don't want to hear it, but when I have ever been wrong? Huh? Tell me."
"You've not been."
"Exactly - I know a leech when I see one. So, you draw your assumptions, but perhaps what Farleigh saw is true, perhaps not - but you'll get more answers by confronting the truth than ignoring it."
He sighed, dropping to your bed, shaking his head. "Well..." He mumbled, "What do you think?"
You paused, "Doesn't matter."
"Does to me. Please, love, it's Eddie again and I don't - "
"All right," you relented, sitting beside him. "My money's on... Something happened, it's just a matter of what, exactly. How about we go to breakfast, see what the energy is there."
"Feels like I can't stomach anything."
"Your mother and father will be upset if we don't go down, c'mon," you whispered, standing, offering your hand. "I'll sit with you, and if you get upset, you can just lean into me, yeah?"
He took your hand, but didn't get up. He just stared at where you were conjoined, rubbing your hand with his thumb. "Does this mean we're fine? That things are... Are things okay between us?"
"Never not been fine, Fi."
"You've avoided me since we got here."
"I've been dealing with shit - "
"That you won't tell me about," he scoffed.
"Yeah," you agreed, his eyes shooting up to meet yours, "you're right, I won't tell you 'cause I can't yet. I want answers first... Then we can talk. I've gotta figure this out for myself, Fi."
"Well, I can help, you know?"
"No, you've helped plenty," you alluded. "C'mon, breakfast."
"Fuck's sake," he grumbled, finally standing, but tightening his grip on your hand. You lead the way to the terrace the Cattons decided to dine at that morning, being the last two to arrive.
There were two seats side-by-side.
"Good morning," you greeted the family that took you in, Felix silent and angry as he took his seat - but still pulled yours out.
"Morning."
"Good morning, darlings," Elspeth breathed from the head of the table.
"You sleep well?" Ollie asked as Felix whipped his cloth napkin to his lap.
"No, not really, mate," he grit, not looking at the boy and instead, reached for your hand. You handed him a cigarette, placing your own between your lips - both forgoing morning meals.
"We're 30 for dinner tomorrow night," Sir James informed the table. "Stopford Sackville has cried off."
"Oh, dear, that's a shame," Elspeth feigned sympathy.
"God, I forgot about fucking dinner," Felix tilted his head back, speaking between his stick as you lit the end of yours - then reaching for his after nudging his bulging bicep to warrant his immediate attention.
"Wait, who is coming to dinner, again?" Farleigh asked.
"The Henrys," Ven reminded.
"No, please!" Farleigh whined quietly.
"Who are the Henrys?" Ollie asked.
"Dad's friends," Ven filled in, Felix glaring at you as you laced your hand with his and squeezed in warning. "They're all called Henry."
"Not all of them," James corrected. "Just most."
"It'll be fun," Elspeth assured.
"It'll be being molested by Henry," Ven continued, swallowing a bite of croissant. "You know which one."
"Oh, I'll put you next to Oliver, then, he can molest you instead," Elspeth quipped, Felix strangling your hand.
"Don't," you whispered, Ollie's head cocking at Ven in an unspoken conversation. She hummed an amused chuckle. Felix glared at them both before looking back at you, silently begging you to let him snap. "Not right now, please, just breathe," you whispered in his ear, ensuring none others heard you.
"Oh, Oliver, I was going to say, we should do something fun for your birthday. Y/N's is at the end of the summer, we can combine efforts! A proper party! No Henrys, something actually fun. What do you think, darling?"
"Mum, you know Y/N doesn't celebrate anymore," Felix seethed with offense.
"Oh, I know, but it might be fun - a combination party?" She offered. "Darling?"
"If Oliver and Y/N would like it, I think it's a splendid idea," James agreed with his wife.
"I think Oliver looks like he'd rather throw himself out of a window," Farleigh chimed, everyone knowing to avoid asking you your thoughts since you couldn't celebrate without your parents - it just felt wrong. Like a betrayal. So, you no longer celebrated the day of your birth, but the Cattons looked for any reason to throw a party.
"What kind of party?" Oliver asked Elspeth.
"I don't know, whatever you want!" She insisted. "What do you think? About 100 people?"
"A hundred?"
"Or two! It invariably ends up being two, doesn't it, with this sort of thing?" She asked her husband, who hummed in amusement. She told Ollie, "Invite whoever you want. All your friends."
"What friends?" Farleigh leered.
"Oh! Oh!" James folded his paper messily in excitement, jumping to attention, "How about fancy dress?"
Ollie reached over and nudged Felix in curiosity, picking up on his angry demeanor. Your best mate looked down at you, making you lean your chin on his shoulder. "Oh, yes!" Mrs. Catton agreed.
"I can wear my suit of armor, Elspeth!" James giddily exclaimed with a childlike grin that made your heart weep gently.
"Good idea, darling," she agreed as Venetia stood hastily from the table; all knowing where she was going, and what she was going to do. "We could have a theme!" She distracted, you watching Venetia and knowing you needed to follow. She'd been caring for you in your illness, you could at least hold her hair back, too. "What about Midsummer Night's Dream?" Elspeth looked around for opinions.
"Lovely," James prasied.
"Bring on the slutty fairies," Farleigh mused.
"Awh, lovie, you'll still be the sluttiest fairy, don't worry," you teased, glancing back again and seeing Venetia escape inside.
"You wanna match my sluttiness?" He asked you.
"As if that was ever in question," you shot back, Felix offering you a small look. "I'll be right back," you excused yourself, standing from your seat but bending at the waist. You whispered in Felix's ear, "I've gotta go, 'M sorry, just keep calm, love. You're all right."
"Find me later," he requested, holding your hand a moment longer before letting you escape.
"So," James grinned as you walked away, leaning in towards his son, "how are things with you two?"
"Yes, darling, you two seem better! Did you finally tell her how you feel?" Elspeth asked.
If Felix was surprised by his parents knowledge, he didn't show; instead scoffing lightly, "Yeah, right..."
"Oh, darling - "
"She doesn't feel the same, Mum," he refused, sighing deeply - making Oliver's stomach coil. "Just leave it, all right? We're just friends, only ever gonna be just friends - she's part of the family. No need to mess all that up."
Farleigh smirked subtly and took a drag from his cigarette.
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While hosting the Henrys for dinner, you felt another tide turn while sitting amongst the rich and fabulous. You knew them all, of course, grew up knowing them and attending these dinners with your parents. But something was amiss, something churned your stomach and clenched your heart.
You felt your chest tickle and tighten, the desperate need to cough nearly strangling you; Oliver paying close attention to your struggle from beside Felix. You coughed unexpectedly, seeing blood splatter onto your plate and without a single person noticing, you got up, excused yourself, and rushed from the dinner table with a hand over your mouth. Duncan swiftly cleared your place setting.
"Hear that, love?" Felix turned to look at you, only finding an empty seat. He looked around in case you were mingling, not spying you, and slowly got to his feet.
"Where are you going, darling?" James asked, "Sit, sit - "
"I'm only going to check on Y/N," he explained.
"No, no, sit, sit, sit, we know she's been fighting her stomach all summer," James waved off, and slowly, Felix went against his instinct and sat down. Venetia felt her heart steel in annoyance, wishing her brother would just wake up and realize what was happening.
When Oliver caught Venetia's eye, she questioned, "Felix warned you off, then?"
"Well, maybe we just need to be a bit more careful," he hushed.
"No, thanks," Ven refused, not one to sneak around her own home to satisfy her brother's jealously and possessiveness. "It's just sooooo disappointing," she snipped. "You're just another one of his toys."
"Like Y/N?"
"Y/N's not a toy," she barked.
"You're upset," Oliver noted.
"Oh, don't worry, I'm used to it - honestly. I mean, he never liked sharing his toys. Even the ones he doesn't want to play with anymore."
Oliver cocked his head, wondering, "Well, he's kept Y/N around this long."
"Y/N isn't a toy, Oliver, not to Felix, not to this family," she sneered in anger. "And he won't ever grow tired of her, she doesn't hold a temporary position in his life - unlike most." She chuckled dryly, "Honestly, do you not get it by now? She's the gatekeeper, and you're just a passing interest. You won't ever truly be his because she already is, and there's no replacing Y/N L/N - not to Felix, not in this lifetime." She offered a fake smile and turned from him to face her left, distracted by one of the Henrys.
Oliver knew all that, and he was working on removing you from the portrait - but it seemed, maybe he didn't have to work too hard. A rare disease had infected you the moment Oliver Quick laid eyes on Felix Catton - eating away at you internally, making you lose interest in yourself, plaguing you with self doubt to the point you couldn't look in a mirror without seeing a stranger. When Oliver decided to act against the pretty, rich boy, he started a chain of events that lead here: him, in a tux, at a dinner party, and you, shattering the frail skin on your knees from how hard you dropped to them - spewing blood, wine, and sunflower blossoms.
You choked harshly, make up ruined from your blood, sweat, and tears; hacking out most of a put-together flower. Your throat was shredded, dripping blood down into your lungs to slowly fill them again - floral growth breaking the barrier of your organs, sending unimaginable pain through your body.
You heard the karaoke begin, heaving over the sounds of drunken antics. You slowly crawled out of the bathroom, sniffling as you used your bed to lift your fragile body to your feet only to strip from your gown and crash into bed. Weakness invaded your muscles, exhaustion coated your bones, and your eyes stung with the endless supply of tears that would stain your cheeks.
Morning came far too quickly, and with it, Farleigh's forced departure from Saltburn. You were all dreadfully confused, Venetia explaining he'd been caught nicking items from around the house to sell for a profit - perhaps feeling desperate, wanting to help his mother without needing to ask for the help.
You weren't sure what to say to the situation, so you said nothing, but felt desperate to scream for your own help at the top of your lungs. The closer Ollie's birthday drew, the more you bent over the toilet, the more blooms that tore from your lungs and esophagus. You were at a loss over what to do, fearing you were too late for a doctor, and on the hottest day of the year, while everyone was outside by the water, you were inside, scouring the vast and random library.
"Miss," Duncan leered from behind you, no longer causing fright. "Is there something I can help you locate?"
"No, I'm just doin' some more research, Duncan, thank you, though."
"On what's wrong, Miss?"
"Yeah," you frowned, storing another book. "Nothing answers my questions, nothing explains this condition."
"Hm," he considered, "may I?"
"Please," you gestured him forward, watching in mild curiosity as he moved the ladder, ascended, looked over the spines of the many books and then made his selection.
"I've read every book in this library, and think this might help," He explained, handing you the dark green book about Japanese lore and watching you instantly finger through it.
You eyed him for a moment, asking, "You haven't told them, have you?"
"I found your request for privacy reasonable," he nodded, "and have not told the masters of the house."
You nodded, breathing in relief. "I promise, I'll tell them soon - when I figure this out."
"I think you already have," he mentioned, glancing at the open book in your hands. When you looked down, you had paused on a page titled: Hanahaki Disease.
The chapter was filled with detailed accounts of previous patients and sufferers; all giving a recollection of their battle with the unknown illness. You looked up at Duncan in shock, rereading the passage that told you what you needed to know:
"Hanahaki Disease can be fatal by making the infected vomit flora; either just petals or full blooms. There are three known variations of the disease, but all are caused by unrequited love - making the process often long, drawn out, and incredibly painful. The first variation involves the infected confessing their love to their desired, and that love being returned. This is the cleanest way to cure Hanahaki Disease. The second variation includes the desired not returning the known affection, leaving the infected to undergo surgery, a viable but messy recovery. The operation removes the plants growing in the lungs, but in turn, also removes all known traces and memory of the desired - but it does result in the infected being cured. The third and final variation is the worst, where the infected confesses, the desired does not return any affection or want, and leaves them to suffer until the bitter, bloody end. Without care or caution, this disease can become unmanageable with common side effects including but not limited to: blood loss, weight loss, avoidance, isolation, fear of food, fear of living, fear of affection, miscommunication, blood from other bodily orifices, and uncontrollable depression, anxiety, and other mental afflictions. Most infected never fully recover from the aftermath of this disease, and even when their love is returned, they are often haunted by the damaging effects of unrequited love."
You stared at the passage in shock, looking up slowly to spy Duncan staring at you in pity.
"I had a companion like you are to Mr. Felix, once," he confessed. "I was dedicated to my job, loyal to the Cattons, and in turn, he suffered greatly because I couldn't love him how he deserved." Duncan blinked at you twice in the silence that stretched between you. "My advice, Miss? Do not wait - you should come clean to Mr. Felix, let him decide how he feels, and should he not return your affection, I will take you personally to the hospital, where you might choose to undergo the procedure."
"And lose all memory of Felix? Of the Cattons? Of Saltburn?" You asked in desperation, tears swelling in your sunken eyes. "Not likely, Duncan, they're my family. I couldn't bear to forget them, even if it means I should live - I wouldn't be alive anymore. Not without him, not without this family that took me in without a moment's hesitation. I'd lose myself."
"But you'd have the chance to discover something new," he argued gently. "You have your own decisions to make, Miss, but I can only tell you my deepest regret was being so far up Sir James' arse that I missed the life that passed me by. And now," he sighed, "I live with the fact that I condemned my beautiful Roger."
"I'm sorry for your loss, Duncan..."
"I do not wish to see you suffer more than you have been," he frowned. "But I understand the fear you have, emotions are terrifying, especially for the young. But love is not conditional, Miss... Remember that. And having only a part of Mr. Felix would result in losing yourself entirely, whereas losing a part of him would result in you rediscovering all you are. Just... Just something to think about."
"How did you find this?" You asked softly.
"After Roger, I had no reason to care for much else other than the written accounts of those who passed before me. It felt like I was given a life to live, if only vicariously. I've read them all," he reminded, gesturing to the grand library, "and when I found this, I knew I had my answers. That being afraid costs us more than being brave."
You read the book in its entirety. You soaked in every recorded account.
Duncan's words weighed on your heart, and the last few nights leading up to Oliver's party were spent on bruised knees. Venetia still slept in your room a few nights a week, begging you to seek medical attention, and you promised her, after the party, you'd take action. She didn't need to know you were lying just yet.
But as it seemed, your lies were minuscule in comparison to others.
The day of the party arrived, Felix taking Ollie out for a drive as a birthday present. Where their destination was, you didn't know, you couldn't care, because watching them drive off the property dropped you to the ground as your heart felt as if it were physically shattered. You couldn't breath, the sunflowers strangling you from the inside, and after watching the love of your life drive off with another lad, you felt as if your fate was sealed.
That was it.
He didn't love you, he had Ollie. There was only so much love to be given at a time, and Ollie soaked it all up. You didn't stand a chance, you knew Felix's infatuation was out of control with Ollie's pitiful background piquing his interest. You felt like old news, you felt abandoned, alone, cold, heartless...
"What're you wearing tonight?" Venetia asked, tossing pieces of clothing around. "Felix is wearing these sort of golden wings, want to match?"
"What are you wearing, love? Maybe I'll match with you?"
"No, no," she grinned, "I've just found the perfect outfit for you!"
She squealed in excitement, turning to show you the dress seemingly made out of strips of fabric and a corset; creating an ethereal look and design. The color was pale, moss green with shimmering pale golds and nudes paired amongst the fabric. It created an illusion that the mini dress moved and swished around your thighs, and when she handed you golden gladiator sandals, you were sold.
Venetia spent more time helping you get ready than she did herself. She ensured your hair was pinned off your neck, that your make-up was mystical and covered in glitter, corset cinched at the waist to show your figure, and that you had a smaller pair of golden wings to top off your slutty fairy look.
Farleigh would've been proud.
The dress showed off your back, only thin straps keeping it in place as the wings were small enough that you weren't hidden under them. You showed more skin in that dress than you had all summer, your thinning frame tailored under Venetia's talented fingers.
Her hands clapped when you showed her the final look.
"Love the spider web chain," you complimented, clipped her in.
"Sure?"
"It's a look, Ven, you're stunning," you complimented, smiling at your friend with genuine kindness. "C'mon, I think I can hear people arriving."
Once more, Venetia squealed and snatched your hand, racing from her room and leading you into the party on the grounds as the sun was beginning to set. After greeting Elspeth and Sir James, complimenting their chosen costumes, you were sucked into a night of young debauchery; Venetia pinned to your side.
And thankfully, she was there to witness the moment you gave up. Moving through one of the darkened rooms, you were mingling with old classmates, happy to see familiar, friendly faces, and just as you turned, your glass shattered to the floor with the last bit of your heart and composure.
You saw Felix, clear as day, dancing with none other then fucking India - the girl you felt most in competition with, besides Annabel. He was so close to her, they were practically fucking; seemingly distracted by one another, they didn't even notice the party.
"Oh, love," Ven turned to you, but you just gave her a pained look.
"I'm gonna go," you rushed.
"No, wait - "
"I need to be alone, Ven," you insisted, the tears starting as your chest felt too tight in the crowded room. "I told you, I fucking told you, he doesn't feel the same," you sniffled, her eyes widening as you felt a familiar metallic taste in your mouth.
When your hand lifted, you smeared blood from your lips and nostrils, blinking in recognition - knowing what was to come next.
"I-I-I have to go, 'M sorry," you rushed, blood oozing and dripping down your neck in artistic scribbles. You didn't bother hiding this time, turning from your fellow drunkards to escape outside - heading for the maze, like you always did when needing to be alone.
Your room wasn't safe, anyone could find you there. The entire home was overrun with party-goers. The grounds surrounding Saltburn unsafe for your breakdown, as well.
So, you raced to the one place you felt safe anymore: the maze.
Your blood stained the shrubbery as you stumbled through it, trying to hold together, but the moment you reached the Minotaur statue, your legs gave up, mud squishing to your knees, and instantly coughing, hacking, and heaving blood from your lungs.
Long, pretty bright yellow sunflower petals came out in an abundance, the most it's ever been, before you were vomiting full blooms again.
You felt woozy, dizzy... Less than human.
You just wanted it to stop.
When you left Venetia's side, she noted you beelining outside and knew immediately where you had run off to. In unfiltered anger, she turned and shoved through the crowd up to her brother, grabbed him by the strap of his wife beater, and yanked him after her.
"Oi! Hey, hey, hey, Venetia! What the fuck are you doing!?"
"You've fucked up!" She raged, ignoring the looks from others and lead him outside so they could hear each other.
"Are you out of your mind?" He demanded.
"Are you!?" She sneered. "The fuck are you doing!?"
"What?" He scoffed, "What am I doing wrong, dancing at our party? Hmm?"
"With that skank!?"
"Hey!" India barked, having followed them outside.
"This doesn't concern you!" Ven barked, Felix feeling on-edge with his sister so enraged.
"You're talkin' about me, I think it does!"
"Ven, what the hell's gotten into you - "
"It's about Y/N!"
Felix froze for a moment, then looked at India, "Go inside."
"What!?"
"Piss off, India! She's right, this doesn't concern you!" He snapped, the girl scurrying away with her tail tucked firmly between her legs. When Felix looked at his sister, he demanded in a rush, "What about Y/N? Where even is she - "
"I promised her I wouldn't intervene, I swore I wouldn't say anything - especially to you, but you're such a fucking idiot, if you're not fed anything, you don't get it!"
"Is this really the time to insult me?"
She glared, steeling her jaw and gritting, "Y/N's in the maze."
"Okay? She goes there - "
"No, listen to me," Ven sneered. "She's been in love with you, Farleigh and I both figured it out - but it was really fucking obvious."
Felix blanched in shock, "What?"
"She's in love with you, you fucking idiot! She's been sick the whole summer because you can't love her back!"
"How - what are you on about!?"
"She's been throwing up blood, you're honestly killing her by doing what you're doing with all these girls! By ignoring whatever you feel - by denying it repeatedly! It's not fair! All she's done is love and support you, care for you, protect you, and you're fucking killing her!"
He blinked, "She loves me?"
"Yes, you fucking imbecile! And tonight was her last straw, I fucking saw it! She lives here, you jagoff, and you're dancing with India - right in front of Y/N? In her own home? Where she's supposed to be safe!?"
"I-I didn't - I didn't know!"
"No shit, because you're both fucking idiots who talk about everything except your feelings! Do better, Felix! Now, go! She needs you to be a fucking man - go! She needs you, Felix, she's in the maze, don't fuck this up more than you have!"
He didn't hesitate to shoot off in the direction of the maze, Farleigh catching sight and pushing his brows together before realizing he was sprinting after you - I mean, who else would Felix move that fast for? Into the maze Felix went, and Farleigh knew, everything was about to change. Elspeth and Sir James didn't notice a thing, too distracted by their party, but there was another watching; a set of dead, ghostly blue eyes nearly glowing in the night as they locked onto their prey fleeing the party.
Felix sprinted his way through the maze, an expert at navigating, and when he made it to the center, his own heart constricted to a suffocating depth.
"Oh, my girl," he rushed to your side, getting on his knees and holding your weakening body as crimson dribbled from your mouth. The pool of blood was grand enough that he worried how you'd make it through the night; floating sunflowers a hauntingly beautiful sight in the dead of night. "Hey, hey, you're okay, you're all right, I got you - I'm here," he whispered, smoothing hair from your face. "It's me, it's your Felix, love, just focus on me, yeah?"
And finally, with a sniffle that did little to nothing, you looked into his eyes with yours rimmed in red. "Fi..."
"Don't talk, save your energy, I'm gonna get you somewhere safe - "
"I've gotta tell you something."
"Tell me after we get to your room, yeah?"
Your head shook, "If I wait longer, it'll get worse."
"Sweetheart, please - "
"I'm in love with you," you finally confessed to him, unable to look him in the eyes for a second longer. You stared at your demise, blood soaking into both your knees. "Have been, I think, since I moved in here," you whimpered, "and after my parents died, I fell so fucking in love with you that it hurt. But out of fear of losing this friendship, I couldn't - I couldn't tell you. And now, it's killing me, but you deserve to know: I'm so fucking in love with you, makes me physically ill. I-I can't do this anymore, Fi, I just can't - the pain is too much and I've already lost so much - "
"Felix?" Ollie called in a drunken whine, entering the center.
"Oh, Jesus Christ, man!" Felix snapped, whipping around to glare at Ollie as you folded into his chest out of sheer pain. Of course, in the midst of your confession, nobody but Oliver fucking Quick would show up. "Get out of here! Now, Ollie, I'm not fucking joking!"
"Is she all right?" He asked, stumbling a bit.
"What the fuck are you still doing here!? Get out, fucking go, this doesn't concern you!"
"We need to talk, I need to talk to you!"
"It's fine, talk t'him," you wheezed, trying to get to your feet, but failing out of sheer weakness.
"No, you need to fucking go, Ollie! Now! Y/N and I need to talk a helluva lot more than we do!"
You used his shoulders to stand, "Talk t'him, Fi, don't let this shit happen t'someone else." He glanced to your blood as you let go of him, stumbling just out of reach, towards one of the maze exits.
"We need to talk, Felix!" Ollie demanded as you slipped out of sight.
"No, you know what? Fuck you!" He barked. "You're not what's important right now, Ollie! For fuck's sake!"
"Don't go after her," Ollie sneered, stepping in Felix's way when he climbed to his feet and meant to go after you.
"Fuck is wrong with you, mate!?" Felix raged, shoving Ollie back several steps. "Hey? So fucked in the head, you think you take precedence over my girl?"
"Y-Your girl?"
"Fucking Y/N!" He shouted. "Yes! My fucking girl, that I was so blinded by you to fucking see what was wrong! Now fuck off!"
"She's nothing - "
"SHE'S FUCKING EVERYTHING!" Felix shouted, you pausing in the maze when you heard it. "You and I can talk later, if I even fucking want to, but right now, my girl needs me - not fucking you!"
"I see she's got you so blinded - "
"You think Y/N's the problem here?" Felix sneered, getting in Ollie's face; fisting the lapels of his blazer. "Huh? You blaming her?"
"No, just saying - "
"All the wrong fucking things," Felix shoved him back again. "She's all that fucking matters to me!" He shouted again, you slowly nearing the entrance into the center of the maze, remaining hidden behind a shrub. "Not you, not all your lies - but her! It's always been her, but you fucking knew that, didn't you!? You saw what we were, what we had, what we could've been, what we were dancing around, and just had to wedge yourself between us, yeah? I didn't see it before, but your fucking lies - all your fucking lies, you were trying to ruin the best thing in my life! And you might've just succeeded!"
"She doesn't deserve you! None of them do!"
"What the fuck is wrong with you, Oliver!?" Felix cried, "Leave me the fuck alone! Leave us the fuck alone! Leave my family the fuck alone! Christ! Please, stop!"
"We need to talk!" Ollie now approached Felix, making him back up into the statue.
"We can't - we can't, are you fucking crazy? Haven't you ruined enough!?"
"Me!?" He snarled. "I didn't ruin shit, it was her! It was all her, don't you see? You pitied us against each other, I had to do this! For you! You can't just throw me away!"
Felix lost his temper, shoving Oliver again, "Get the fuck away from me! I can! I can and I will throw you away - for her! I'd do anything for her, don't you fucking get that!? I didn't see before, but now I do, the slimy, scum you are - and I'd throw you away a hundred times if it meant being with her! Fuck out of here, leave us alone!"
Oliver shouted as he grabbed Felix's shirt, "Look, I just gave you what you wanted!" His voice lowered to a quiver, "Like everyone else does. Everyone puts on a show for Felix! So, I'm sorry that my - m-m-my performance wasn't good enough, like Y/N's always is."
You crept from the shadows, neither lad noticing; intrigued by the words being slurred, shouted, and weaponized.
"I think... I think you need to see somebody," Felix whispered, not willing to admit aloud that Oliver was scaring him. "You need help, okay? Seriously."
"No. No, I don't," Ollie sneered - sounding almost sober. "I just need you to understand how much I fucking love you."
And there it was - another confession. Your heart (or whatever was left of it) felt heavy, like it was being constricted and anchored to your feet.
Felix whispered, "I love Y/N, mate, you have to know - wasn't exactly a huge secret, except to us. To her and I, not you and I, Ollie."
You felt something akin to shock spark in your gut, blooming an unknown warmth through your body.
Oliver begged, "You're the only friend I ever had, Felix." His thumbs pet Felix's face despite him trying to wriggle away; being touched by the psychotic liar terrifying him - but no more than the feeling of dread he had watching you stumble away. "Okay... I mean, doesn't this just prove how much - how much of a good friend I actually am? How well I actually know you? I'm still the same person! Yeah?" He whimpered, "I'm still the same person."
"I don't know what you are," Felix whispered in reply. "But I do know you," he paused, confessing, "you make my fucking blood run cold." His head shook, "I know friendship - and it's not this, Ollie, it's not built on lies and deception. Y/N? She's everything to me, mate, and you tried to ruin that. You're a fucking liar, Ollie."
He gagged a little, releasing Felix to stare at him with a sense of defeat. Oliver gagged again, shoving the opened champagne to Felix's chest, muttering, "Wait there a sec," before stepping away to throw up on the opposite side of the statue. He knew the other boy wouldn't be able to resist an open bottle of alcohol.
However, Felix felt it was his opening to escape, and when he looked up, he caught sight of you.
Your finger rose to your lips in a silencing motion, glancing at a puking Oliver, and Felix didn't hesitate to drop the bottle and race for you. When his hands smoothed over either of your cheeks, he checked behind him - seeing Ollie still at a distance - stooping to scoop you in his arms, whispering, "We have to go, love, fucking now."
You agreed and let him rush away into the maze, and before you could exit, Oliver was heard bellowing, "FELIX!"
"What the fuck was all that?" You asked, hiding yourself in his neck; neither caring for the blood being stained.
"I'll explain everything in a minute, love, let me get you somewhere safe," he rushed, the party sounding around you once more. He deflected anyone who got in the way, shoulders bullying past people, ignoring his name being cried out. Up the stairs, down a hall or two, and he was rounding into your room. "All right, hang on," he deposited you on your bed, rushing into your restroom and locking all the doors except the one connecting your room. The main door was also locked.
"What's going on?" You asked.
"He's a liar," Felix panted, wrangling from his wings as he approached you. "But it doesn't matter right now - what matters is our truth. You were interrupted before, but I have to tell you, sweetheart, that your affection isn't one-sided. Okay?" He knelt before you, taking both cheeks in hand. "You're not alone in this, I-I should've told you so much sooner, but I love you, too. No, no, I'm - I'm in love with you and I'm so sorry I didn't say it. Hear me? I'm in love with you, Y/N, I'm so sorry I was selfish, that I didn't see the pain you were in that I was causing."
"Wasn't your fault," you whispered.
"It's all my fault."
"I should've said something, too."
"You're the one who's been suffering all this time, this is on me. Okay?" His head shook, wiping the streams of blood from your nose and lips. "You're a fucking wreck, darling, should've said something so much sooner - saved you from all this pain."
"I was afraid, and didn't want you to know."
"I made you feel as if you couldn't talk to me," his head shook. "Listen to me, I-I have to go warn Mum and Dad about Oliver, but you stay here - "
"You're not leaving," you insisted. "Call Venetia's cell or Farleigh's, tell them whatever you're worried about, and stay here, with me, where you're safe. I don't know what I heard, but I don't think Ollie's well in the head and he's gonna gun for you."
He sighed, "They won't answer. The party's - "
"Just try..."
He agreed and grabbed his cell phone from his pocket, dialing his sister as he got you a wet cloth. She answered when he was knelt in front of you again, wiping the remnants of your near-death experience from your face as he explained at a rapid speed a condensed version of events.
When Venetia assured she would tell Elspeth and James, he hung up and brought you in for a tight hug. "Should've told you," he whispered, "I'm so sorry."
"I am, too," you whimpered, holding onto his neck tightly.
"C'mon," he sighed, pulling back to gaze at you, "let's get you changed and in bed - 's been a fucking nightmare tonight."
"How fitting."
"How so?"
You half-smirked, "A Midsummer Nightmare's Dream, innit?" He matched your fleeting amusement.
That night, you and Felix slept beside each other in a secure and locked room; both unconscious when Oliver approached your door and tried to get in before being apprehended by two footmen. He was locked in the basement for the night, given the chance to sober up before morning, when the police would be phoned.
When the sun broke the horizon, Felix woke with a start. You were already awake, looking up at his pale face, begging him to tell you the truth behind Oliver. He looked as if he would be sick, giving you a detailed summary of what happened the day before - all the lies Ollie told, how his parents were alive, well, and very kind. How nothing he's told Felix was true - all some form of fucked up lie to make him seem more broken for Felix's endearment.
"Am I that bad, love?" He asked in a hushed tone.
"No, you're just... You just have an affinity for broken things," you answered. "And he gave you what you wanted, tenfold."
"I feel so stupid."
"For being kind?" You shook your head, caressing his cheek.
"Not very kind t'let you suffer in silence, was it?"
"You couldn't have known how bad it all was, I wasn't exactly truthful either."
"You protected yourself, while Ollie... Ollie put on a fucking show to get attention, to seem so different, make me feel like I'd be a fool to ignore him," he scoffed. "I'm so sorry, love," he whispered, resting his forehead against yours. "But I meant what I said - you're fucking everything to me and I'd throw everyone away if it meant being with you - keeping you."
It felt so good to assure him, "You have me, Felix. 'M not goin' anywhere."
He smiled gently, sighing in relief, asking, "Can I kiss you now? Please, love, think we've waited plenty long enough."
You didn't answer, you only lifted you lips to his and sealed your fate - meshing into one heart, soul, and one being. Two halves, made whole; cut from the same cloth and stitched together. His tongue swept across the seam of your lips, mingling with yours and never knowing when he had felt so complete while kissing a woman.
Because he hadn't. Everyone else before you was a place holder, temporary, a fleeting interest. You were a part of him, never wanting to experience life without the other, but as the house slowly woke up, you were both reminded of reality...
There was still a madman to be dealt with, and Felix wanted a front row viewing to ensure Oliver Quick was truly gone and your lives in a relationship could finally start.
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requesting rules and masterlist
Saltburn masterlist
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other Hanahaki Disease fics:
featuring: Eddie Munson from Stranger Things
Cherry Blossom Colored Kisses
Tears in the Rain
Gone with the Sin
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