#can’t quite remember why
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The Madrigal Triplets!
#encanto#madrigal triplets#bruno madrigal#pepa madrigal#julieta madrigal#mazedraws#originally drawn for their birthday but never posted#can’t quite remember why
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#- HK#I would say some of my peers pushed the cooties narrative but my parents discouraged it#so I never thought of boys as being gross or having transmissible microbes#and I was always raised to value romance so I I don’t think I ever noticed a shift in my attitude towards the male sex#however I was somewhat (okay Very) bitter when suddenly it was inappropriate for me to be alone in a room with my male friend#but that bitterness had nothing to do with my own feelings towards guys#(and I truly think it was unavoidable. it’s part of growing up.#you can’t know why it’s inappropriate unless you also know all the lurid things two teens can get up to alone.)#(perhaps the suddenness of the change can be mitigated but the sadness can’t)#anyways I’ve always wondered about this shift everyone talks about that happens around middle school#because I remember feeling quite glad and natural in it. though I always was an aspiring adult)
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Remembering the sonadow fic called Cracking shells. I hope sonic and shadow are still taking care of those chickens together <3
(10/10 would def recommend especially if you’re looking for something unique!!! Been adding more to my recs page on ao3 and was thinking about it)
#sonadow#this is not a joke I am being /gen#it’s orphaned on ao3 but still up hence why I did not put the author#it’s a good story!!!#It’s just niche lol#personally I love the sonadow domestic life and I have experience with chickens (my family raises them) so I am the target audience for it#sonadow domestic life = anything where they live out their daily lives together#that’s what I mean when I say that#also farmer/pet owner x vet is such an underrated ship type#I can’t remember if they live together at the end but they both care about the chickens#fanfic rec#fanfiction recommendation#ao3#also it’s 10K words!!! quite the morsel!!! <3#did I mention that I love this fic and I am the target audience???
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can you tell us more about danrific? I was a post coming out phannie and love learning more about lore hehe
so cat used to work for dailybooth (yes that daily booth) before being a youtuber and i’m pretty sure that’s how she initially got to know dan cos he was a big user there. i still don’t know where danrific came from as a ship but it’s most likey born from a push back against phan shipping, cos people that didn’t believe in phan were like SUPER passionate about it and kinda would ship dan with any girl they saw him with but cat was definitely the most popular.
it was an interesting thing to come about cos like i feel like they didn’t really make that many videos together and they didn’t interact loads unless dnp were in america, like it’s actually really hard to find photos of them together and the ones there are often have other youtubers in them cos they were at vidcon or something
people were also always so mean to cat cos they wanted phan to be real and i definitely think that caused issues in there friendship but there’s some controversies with cat that i won’t get into but that also added to people not really liking her
if anyone else wants to add anything feel free cos this is just shit off the top of my head and i know other people will also have stuff they can tell you that i didn’t think of 😂
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finally catching up with bsd after one hell of a month (+ midterms) 🫠
#bsd spoilers#updates for ep 2 :3#right off the bat all i can just say is fukuchi is such a well-written villain; while i can’t completely emphathize with his plan yet#i have to applaud him (uh and asagiri too) bc that’s quite a villain to fear—he’s already in a position of power that puts him in a major#advantage compared to the ada; it’s like he masterminded this whole thing to lead up to this but WHY (idk if i just forgot)#point and case: i hate him and im always terrified of his next move but damn he’s such a well-written antagonist i can’t even 🤐#ATSUSHI GET OFF THAT FUCKING BOAT RN WHY DID IT HAPPEN SO EARLY INTO THE SEASON IM CRY WAIT NO#fukuchi pointing out that ranpo is just jealous that he and fukuzawa way back is just so adorable made me forget what happens next haha#how come i dont remember these cute moments from the manga 😩#god im stalling so much :(( i hate it i hate it i hate it#the reveal was so… he should’ve deducted this shit sooner (objectively the build up was so nice hsjdhdj)#MY JAW DROPPED THEN AND IT STILL HAPPENED NOW :)))))#ok fukuchi in his complete villain mode is kinda 😗#watching this after being detached to bsd in general is so much better bc i can now appreciate the whole thing as is without much bias???#THE WAY HE JUST TURNED COLD ALL OF A SUDDEN AND I OOP— 😗😗😗😗😗#oh both canon and beast atsushi and their paralyzing fears :(( my heart actually hurts#ATSUSHI THINKING HE’S ALONE ANDDDDDD#OH MY GOD I CANT DO THIS ANYMORE MY SSKK#I CANT WATCH THE NEXT EPISODE#toff.txt
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i’m tired of disappointing people i want them to stop expecting anything of me. stop wanting anything from me. i can’t live up to it and i can’t be good i’ll never be good
#i remembered that my mom asked me to go shopping with her#but i was drunk when she asked and i didn’t really say yes or no#i can’t remember if it was earlier in the day or later i have no idea#and i don’t think she ending up going at all#and i didn’t want to go (i mean i was quite drunk) and i’m just lazy and didn’t want to do anything#and shopping puts me in a rotten mood anyway i wouldn’t have been fun#but now i think she must’ve have a bad day bc of me and i wish she wouldn’t want me around so much#idk why she does i’m honestly so miserable to be around i wish everyone would just leave me alone#pink’s word vomiting
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tfw you’re just trying to look up some current affairs and end up on a late night wikidive instead
#s. so. haze season has finally returned huh……. i completely forgot it was a thing tbh#can’t believe *the* haze has its own wikipage tbh… of all things to have a page why *that*???????#and there are even pages for almost every year of haze. like lmaoooooooo who had this much free time to document it hello~~~~???#but man~~~~~ i hope my bro’s doing aight in this with his military training and all… i hope they’re giving him sufficient water breaks#nah wait he’ll be fine. he’s physically fit. he can survive a workout in the haze… probably. provided it doesn’t get worse. ahaha…….#hm. but. anyways. stay safe and hydrate yourselves if you’re affected by *the* haze. drink water!!!!!!!!!#h e lp wait i forgot about the thank you for the clean air page im c r y i ng#2015’s haze was quite the time though……. i just remembered my then-friends sending a voice mail to our chat group to manifest school closure#and t h e n sending a follow up recorded cheer of ‘nO SCHOOL!!!!!!!’ when school was (indeed) cancelled due to the weather#g o d i haven’t thought about them in a long while… i hope they’re doing fine these days#oops forgor to disable rbs for a bit this app is kinda annoying tbh
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im a bit catastrophic autism level about characters having missing memories that they cant reach but know are meant to be there, i have a dnd character in a really similar situation!! i just love the feelings of frustration and horror... which memories and thoughts can you even trust? if memories can be removed can they be added?? what do you really know??? its the best for real poor ns
I KNOWWWW I FUCKING LOVE THAT CONCEPT SO MUCH!!!!! just that feeling of something being out of your reach. something you Know but can’t Remember. i love how i put it: like walking into a mall in the middle of the weekend and seeing that it’s empty. because you know it should be full of people. you know what should be there. but there’s nothing. no matter how much you look, there’s nothing, there’s nobody. it’s frustrating and horrifying and and (explodes in autism)
#YOU. ME. SHAKING HANDS#SERIOUSLY LOVE THE CONCEPT SO BADLY#i really wanted that specific feeling of being so traumatized by something. but you cant fully remember what it is#you Know something awful has happened to you. you have a sort of vague idea of what it might be. you even have a suspicion of who might’ve#done it because when you look at them you feel . bad. because the body remembers#but you can’t fully remember what exactly happened or why or who did it. all you have are those weird fleeting moments that you can’t fully#make sense of. puzzle pieces that don’t quite fit#i thought it might be interesting for an iterator considering they are both organic *and* a machine! logically if they were just a fully#inorganic machine then they wouldn’t be able to tell that something has even happened. they’d just be repogrammed and forget and that’s it.#but i really wanted to consider that aspect of the *body* remembering. of iterators being semi-organic. How would that entire removing#memories process feel when you’re still aware and conscious and *alive*? do u get what im saying#it’s just aughhh so interesting to me. i rly hope i’ve been portraying it well#cramswering
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sorry if I don’t remember your name or conversations/experiences or basic things about myself, every few weeks my brain gets factory reset and I have to relearn how to be alive
#lighthearted but also serious bc what is going on here buddy#been feeling weird as hell these past few months#like I can remember some stuff… but it doesn’t feel normal to forget the names of anyone I haven’t seen/heard the name of in a few days#or forget about basic interests and personality traits and experiences and feel like a blank slate every day#idk like ultimately life goes on and I’m happy to live in the moment but it would be nice to understand why my brain is doing this#just thinking#meposting#I think my brain just. does this sometimes when I’m stressed. which is annoying#I recall (lmao) feeling similar during earlier parts of life so this isn’t *new* it’s just unexpected and much more disruptive as an adult#I’m feeling better about it than I was. after like. acknowledging it. bc my mind has not always felt like a sieve it isn’t always this bad.#whatever#I’ll tag as dissociation just in case it’s related/reminiscent and ppl don’t want to see that#dissociation#me and her go way back… haven’t seen each other in years though#she wasnt all bad! coping mechanisms can provide relief and a sense of safety#and as far as coping mechanisms go it’s not the most unhealthy. though it ranks high in ‘socially stunting’#I kind of miss the distance sometimes to be honest everything’s just So Much all the time#I’m so solid now#so stuck in the ruts of capitalism#fuck capitalism#I wish my imagination didn’t feel so dulled#sorry I love talking#and I don’t miss dissociation when I feel mentally present because I feel so Here with the people and things I love but rn?#it’s like a lose-lose bc I am not Here nor am I untethered. I’m heavy yet hold nothing#I enjoy being dramatic/poetic about it — I feel pretty fine. I just hope this isn’t a permanent and/or long-term state of existence.#like it makes me awful at my job I went from remembering a solid amount of the student body’s names (built up over a few years) to. like 5.#overnight it felt like. like Stressful Thing happened and I went to work and I couldn’t remember anyone’s names.#can’t believe I have to start from fucking scratch AGAIN I’d be better off quitting and working at a different school#bc at least then my lack of knowledge/remembering is justified rather than strange and seemingly rude#I’m getting better now but at the beginning of this it was blue screen in my brain all the time
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when it comes to workers n creatives rights, specifically those in the industry I always feel so like conflicted abt shit like. pay ur workers or die, but why didn’t they cancel the flash…
ezra millers various crimes aside, they were workin on that shit since I was in high school and apparently it was booty ass?? worse than booty ass?? and the whole movie got leaked too.. Like when u have a situation like that what do you do
#I’m also pissed abt spider-verse because while yes it’s cool#while it was good that they took feedback from pavs actor how they fuck do u get to animating without consulting someone#and have to animate his entire part all over again because they couldn’t afford to idk ask?? hire a sensitivity reader??#I love atsv and im admittedly bummed that’s it’s gonna take so long to wrap up but like#100 animators quit!! What the Fuck#i this kris anka worked on Miguel’s design for either a month or a year but I can’t remember what#the two separate models for hobie#and thank god atsv is doing so well but what if it didn’t#the spent so much time on the flash alledgedly and my brain is like#why didn’t they just cancel it but I know why they couldn’t#but what about Leslie graces batgirl??#so many shows are getting canceled a week after they wrap and just getting deleted#or god with webcomics that become Webtoon originals? They can just cancel ur comic and keep it??#also what the Fuck is going to be done about ezra miller
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x
#i fucking hate always being the one who has it worse than others#it alienates on so many fucking levels#you don’t have the energy to meet up with people bc you’ve had to solve already seven different life altering problems that week#as if you’re on a magic quest#oh and four of those you can’t do anything about bc world politics or finances or societal problems etc#the other three resurfaced some other things you already felt bad about four years ago and could never get rid off in your head#and then of course when people ask you how your xyz was and you either just shrug and lie and give the expected answer#or you tell them the truth how horrible this holiday was or how that thing everyone is supposed to enjoy was actually not possible for you#bc see above#of course ppl will also tell you their problems#but you won’t be able to help thinking ‘okay and…?’ bc quite honestly ppl are complaining about wild shit#where either the solution is ‘do something about it’ or it’s not actually more than a minor complaint in the first place#which leads to the dreaded gap of me thinking ‘i can’t believe you are complaining to me about that when you know i struggle w xyz’#‘and have been for 4 years. it has no future of getting fixed btw itll just always be like that why are you complaining about this bs to me’#or the other person finally remembering like. compatibility of certain issues and they just finish with#‘of course that‘s not half as bad as it is for you’#which they will start hating you for at some point definitely btw#bc they never get to complain about their little life which i understand#but like. i didn‘t choose this y’know#oh and btw they will still hold you up to their standards always#didn‘t clean your flat? didn’t fill out those documents in time? don’t have your life on track?#well that is clearly your fault#and has nothing to do w the circumstances that keeps them from rightly complaining about their own little problems to you#i’m so tired of it it’s so tiring i’m so exhausted#like girl i wish it was easier for me too y’know i’m not doing this for fun#barely holding on as is and then you have to take everyone’s little hurt feelings into account too#bc they’ll also judge you as negative nancy if you have nothing good to say when they ask you how it’s going#‘no one likes a negative attitude’ yeah i’m aware. i live this daily as i struggle to get by. thanks#.txt
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Of course I’m scrolling through tumblr instead of doing all the work I’m behind on.
I’m rambling. I’m sorry.
do better me.
#🌾 I guess.#why am i like this#why am I so freaking lazy all the time.#I’m never productive.#Why can’t I just be normal#Why can’t I be good at paying attention and remembering things in school#Why can’t I just… be better#Why did the therapist I felt comfortable talking to quit her job#And why the heck did I take the time to post this instead of being productive#I’m sorry that I’m venting.#I’m sorry to anyone who had their time wasted by reading this#I’m sorry.
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Hey guys I saw a leaked script for frozen 3 and hands makes a return !!
Hans: literally just breathes
Elsa: smirks and Murders him to death with ice powers, struts away sassily because she’s Idina Menzel
Hands: will return in Frozen 4 and every short thereafter for this same joke
#Hey how the fuck did this copy into italics when I had the asterisks copied#since when does tumblr do that#Disney#frozen 3#frozen#disney frozen#I’m bored I guess because I know I’m opening to a bunch of hate#but nevertheless I am so goddamn tired of overdone jokes and#buttmonkey villains who are supposed to be threatening but are undermined in every appearance thereafter#‘it’s just a kids movie omg’ bro I know. Why don’t you want kids movies to be good#Anyway I’m annoyed by the Wish movie too but apparently that’s controversial to say#sorry but the animation in the trailer is PAINFUL literally it’s a headache trigger#Like I’m sorry I loved Spiderverse and puss in boots last wish#but I can’t even watch Nimona or the Spiderverse sequel rn#I Can’t even play tears of the kingdom. Had to quit because I got badly sick every time I played#Luckily this joke will be swallowed by tumblr because I used too many tags#but ugh I’m just tired of bad jokes#I’m tired of bad dialogue#I saw monsters Inc the other day and remembered what good funny dialogue was in a kids movie#natural interactions and believability and unique voices#voices as in tones and delivery#but also the voice actors yes#I know it’s because of the studios rushing this junk out for a quick buck#and the shit conditions the writers work under#but I’m just like… tired#If wish is any better than the ultra compressed YouTube trailers as they say#maybe I can watch it. And I will judge it in full then#otherwise rn it looks like another disenchanted or whatever they called the enchanted sequel
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Ok, so the demon flowers scene? One page of awkward humor via Hong’er panic-fumbling for Xie Lian’s hair while both are in agony for different reasons overrode four full chapters of contextually creepy attempted sexual assault turned to full-on horrifying self-mutilation for some of y’all? Forreal?
#human reads tgcf: take 1.5#this is why I can’t take some of y’all seriously; cause how was this titillating???#enlighten me on where exactly the ‘enjoyment’ was#i don’t remember being so beat up about this part on my first read#but yo i had to talk myself out of quitting this time around#omg this was terrible#why does tgcf have all the worst scenes???#free my boy xie lian he ain’t deserve this!
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of all the things i like tell me why i’m hyperfixated on post malone again.
#there’s notiing wrong i literally love post malone#i just do not personally know anyone who likes post malone so i just have to like#suffer#and then listen to his music a weird amount#tbf i’d rather obsessively listen to posty than some of my last several music fixations#he has quite a bit of music thats fun#i went through a radiohead era#i can’t remember the tag ive been hsing when i post abt music#corb listens#?!??#see this is why i dont have specific tags for things#i always forget#also#i went through an insane 2 and a half year period where i only really listend to podt malone’s hollywood’s bleeding album#it was great and also a curse#like all fixations inevitably are#i love post malone tho
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Sometimes do you ever listen to All Too Well 10 minute version and remember just how damning it all is lol
#‘you kept me like a secret but I kept you like an oath [and that’s why I’m so fucked up]’#is quite the thesis statement#Taylor swift#atwtvtmv#I hadn’t listened to it in ages but it came on my playlist in my drive home today#and whoooo boy girlie had things to say in that song#I can’t remember if I ever wrote out my feelings#about how all the extra verses are like your friend ranting ‘AND ANOTHER THING’#or if I just did the ramble about the ending only lol
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