#c!karl angst | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

smpgorl · 2 years

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cheap liquor and hope

Karl Jacobs au

tw: family abuse, angst

wc: 1.8 k

summary: Karl's best friend's sister is suspicious until he reveals the whole truth to her, and she finds herself caring more than ever.

...

The sound of my window creaking open awoke me. Was it a sleep paralysis demon or was it- Karl. Of course it was Karl.

"What are you doing here?" I said sleepily, I turned my head to see the clock, 1:33 a.m. Of course only Karl would do this.

I know many people would be scared of this situation but Karl is my brother Will's best friend. Ever since we moved here, Karl has weaseled his way into my parent's hearts but if you ask me something is off. He turns down rides to his house, he has random bruises and cuts, too often.

His hair was wet from the rain, he was dripping all over my floor. He always does this, comes into my room because I'm on the first floor. This has to be the 4th time he's done this. He claims it's an emergency and that he needs to see Will.

"Sorry, I just- I just needed to see Will. He said I could come over." He stuttered, Karl is usually more confident, I'm confused on where the stuttering came from. He also never asks for permission, god what did he do?

I looked down at my sheets, Karl is a menace, but I would be lying if I said I didn't care for him. "Are you okay?" He faced toward me, a large gash covered his face, right below his eye to the bottom of his cheek.

"Oh my god, Karl, what happened?" He didn't answer, instead just continued his journey through my house.

I got up immediately following him to Will's room to see the door cracked and Will awake, most likely waiting for Karl.

"Man, what did you do this time?" Will asked but silenced once seeing me following Karl.

"Sierra, go to bed. Thanks for letting him in." Will spoke briskly approaching us.

"Not like I have a choice, but why must I always leave?" I pried.

"Because it's not your business," he sounded hostile now. Why was Will defensive over Karl?

"Well it is if he uses my window." I kept fighting.

"Si, leave. now." He was turning red, he's a hothead.

I turned immediately leaving and tried not to slam the door in anger on my way out.

He always does this, it's never Karl asking me to leave. I swear he like has a crush on him or something, but he would tell me, Will tells me everything, we're only a year apart.

I struggled falling back asleep, but I eventually did. Until around 6 am, there was a body moving back out the window, Karl.

"Hey." I stopped him.

"Shit, sorry I didn't mean to wake you." He sounded sad, looking at the floor.

"No, it's okay, Karl. What's wrong?" He brushed off the question with a flick of a hand and smiled. It was totally fake.

"Nothin. Goodnight, Sierra."

...

The next morning was hectic, with my parents leaving to go on a business trip that apparently my mom can't go on alone.

"I promise we'll be back in 3 days, hun. You and Will can do this. There's money on the counter for food if you need it, we're a call away." My mom kissed my forehead before turning to my brother.

"Now, you better not throw any parties." My mom pointed a joking finger at Will.

He put his hands up in defeat, "Bummer."

Today is Friday, another day in school. Walking out the door, I don't know why, but I looked for remnants of Karl. Sometimes I feel like he never leaves.

"Come on, Si." Will pulls me to his car. "Yeah." I walked with him.

"What was up with Karl?" I was nosey, impeccably nosey, but I don't care.

"Can't tell you, you know it's private."

"I thought we tell each other everything."

"Yes, but this is my friend, his life is private for a reason."

I looked down at my hands, feeling slightly asshole-ish.

After parking, Karl approached the car immediately, I gave a small smile before departing with my friends.

"Si, have I ever told you how hot Will is?" Chloe laughed looking back at him.

"Have I ever told you to keep those thoughts to yourself because they're incredibly weird." I wasn't joking.

"Whatever, it is what it is." She laughed again. Chloe has had a thing for him since we moved here, I swear she loves him more than me.

...

"Look, I need to take Karl somewhere. I can't give you a ride." Will said, "So you're picking him over me? Why can't I come?" I was agitated, Will never does this.

"I'm sorry, but it's too important. I love you and can cash app you money for an uber if you need it." He sprinted off before I could answer to Karl.

I exhaled and internally screamed. What's so important about Karl, he's getting in the way of my brother and I.

"Come on, lemme give you a ride," I forgot she was even standing there. "Yeah, thanks."

Will wasn't home until 11 pm. "Hey where-" my speech stopped as soon as I saw Karl.

His shirt was gone, his face all bloody, bruises forming on his abdomen. I immediately got up from my seat to go to him, helping Will carry him to the couch.

"Ok, I need to know what's going on."

"We'll explain just go get the first aid kit, you still know how to sew don't you?" Will stopped me.

I nodded before running to the bathroom to get the first aid kit. Karl followed with Will. "Man, I'm gonna go find you some clothes, don't worry." Will left me with Karl.

"Sit on the tub, I got you." I helped him down with him wincing in pain.

"Thanks." He breathed. I got to work on his gash on his forehead. It was small, but deep.

"What happened?" I focused.

"My dad." I stopped in my tracks, I thought he got jumped. His own father?

"Karl, do you live with him?" He nodded and winced.

Tears welled up in my eyes, his pain. "Karl," I whispered. I wanted to hug him but my brother was back.

"you done?" I nodded.

"I worked fast but it seems pretty good." I nodded again.

"Thanks," He helped Karl to his room. I sat there in awe as all the puzzle pieces came together.

I bursted through the door of Will's room.

"Will, he can't go home." Tears welled up in my eyes as I saw Karl's face fall even more. The tears fell fast and before I knew it I felt arms wrap around me, it was Karl.

"Hey, it's okay." He held me.

"How long, Karl?"

"4 years." he whispered into my hair.

"Oh my god." I pulled him closer, not caring for how it looked. He needs this.

...

I learned Karl's story. His dad is an alcoholic, has been since his mom died. He apparently can't leave or else he'll be in foster care. He'd leave us.

"But that's better than the abuse. You can't even think about us now." I stood up from my spot.

"You guys are my family," his voice cracked. "Well maybe we can talk to mom and dad, Will." he shook his head. "Why? Why Will? He needs help."

"Sometimes you can't fix everything lil sis." Will has never been so dark.

"Will, how long have you known?" I sighed.

"6 months." I started crying even more now. "I'm sorry, I can't do this," I whimpered.

I went out and stood on the porch, overlooking other homes in our neighborhood.

When I heard the door, I thought it was Will but it was Karl.

"Hey, kid." he smiled.

"How can you smile? You're trapped." I looked at my feet.

"I'm not trapped, when you're trapped you've lost hope. There's light at the end of the tunnel." I turned to him, for the first time I've had the nerve to look him in the eyes. "Karl, thank you." I hugged him.

"For what?"

"For being so strong."

...

Karl spent the rest of the weekend with us, mostly Will though but he has been interacting with me. It's nice.

"Si, you coming with us?" It was Sunday, our parents are coming back today. "Where are you going?"

"We're gonna have fun. Trust us." They looked mischievous, I needed to see this.

"Okay."

I fell asleep in the car after it felt like we were driving for hours.

"Come on, wake up Sierra." It was Karl shaking me from the front seat. "We're almost here."

"Where are weee?" I yawned.

"Arizona."

My eyes immediately shot open.

"WILL HOW DID WE END UP IN ARIZONA."

"Shush, we drove, only 3 hours." Will laughed.

All I saw around us was desert.

"But, mom and dad?" I was out of breath, like I just had a heart attack.

"I told them you're spending the night at Chloe's and I'm with Karl." He smiled.

"So you planned a roadtrip and just brought me along?"

"Well it was Karl's plan. We're camping."

"In the desert?"

"Yes."

...

It was 9 pm, my brother was of course drunk off of mom and dad's wine they brought along and passed out in the car, completely ignoring the camping aspect.

"Hey Si," Karl broke my train of thought, sitting next to me and smiling. He was always so positive. I loved that.

"Hey Karl." I looked at my hands.

He lifted my chin as I stared at him in confusion.

"You know, I really care about you." I giggled.

Oh god, I'm blushing.

"Yeah? same." Really? Why am I awkward. It was his turn to laugh.

"Do I make you nervous?" He leaned in, his breath on mine.

"Yeah." I gulped and answered quickly.

"Yeah?" He leaned in and before I knew it his lips were on mine. He tasted like cheap liquor, like hope.

He pulled away but I immediately pulled him back in for more. When we were done we laid back and looked at the stars.

"I've been waiting to do that for so long." He smiled, a dorky smile.

...

The next morning I woke up, looking for Karl. My brother was still knocked out but Karl was nowhere to be found.

"Will, wake up." I practically yelled. I shook him a bit until he woke up, holding his head.

"Ow Ow, why are you doing this?"

"Karl is gone."

Will immediately sobered up, sitting up in the backseat of the car and exhaled.

"Si, sit down." So I did.

"Karl is gone. I don't know where he went but he is gone. I don't even know his plan fully." Will had a teary eye.

"Wait, you knew he was gonna leave?" I looked at my brother.

"Yeah. It was his plan, he wanted to get away and we thought it would be better if he just left and we didn't talk. To not compromise it y'know."

"Oh my god. He's gone. How could he be gone?" I sat for a minute before bursting into tears, how could he just leave me like this?

;;;;;;;;;;

a/n: hi! I hope you liked this, and didn't get too upset. Follow for more!

#karl jacobs #c!karl #c!karljacobs #dsmp au #karl Jacobs au #Karl jacobs fanfic #karl jacobs fanfic #Karl jacobs angst #c!karl angst

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timothvy · 2 years

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a perfectly normal lineup of good friends that have no underlying problems when it comes to their blossoming relationship !

#we say until i finish half my angst wips #karlnapity #karlnapity fanart #c!karl #c!sapnap #c!quackity #karl jacobs #quackity #sapnap #dsmp fanart #dsmp #my art

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hubrisity · 2 years

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No history?

I still have hope for them lol

#karlity #honq #fanart #quackity #karl jacobs #mcyt #dsmp #dream smp #lol #anyways #skull emoji #I hate angst #c!quackity #c!karl

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pomellon · 1 year

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Thinking about sad Koolish in the dragon au, how Karl got stuck in the crystalised state just as Foolish flight broke apart and Bad just vanished. The survivors of Foolish’s flight move one, leaving their old dens that are now tainted with bloodshed, but Foolish stubbornly clings on. He wants to figure out what happened with the carnage dragons, he wants to find Bad, and he wants to find a way to wake up Karl.

So he spends years, decades, centuries, looking for clues and following loss leads, all the while collecting knowledge and books about crystallisation. Between his travels he returns to his old dens, to Karl’s crystal. He will talk to him, read books out loud or tell him about his travels, how his search for Bad is going. Every so often he gets really frustrated and upset, he will beg Karl to please wake up, yell at him simply to fill the silence when the loneliness gets too much. He always regrets it afterwards, and then he will curl around the crystal that becomes smaller and smaller as Foolish grows over the years, and he’ll wish for his talonmate’s warmth.

The saurian world is very chaotic, with wild magic and shifting domains and terrains. The area where Foolish’s flight used to be changed from a lush green forest, to sprawling fields, to a rocky canyon over the centuries. Foolish always remembers the way back, memorising new landmarks and keeps a detailed, constantly updating map, but one day when he returns the dens are gone.

He spends months searching the area, flying overhead in search for them, digging until his talons bleed in hopes of finding them. But they’re simply gone, and so is Karl. Then the extinction event happens, and Foolish is forced to move on to survive.

He’s plagued by nightmares, of Karl breaking out from his crystal only to find himself all alone, awake but still trapped in cold darkness with no way out, let to wither where no one can find him. So despite fighting for his own survival, Foolish promises himself to return, to keep searching, and for the first time he prays to the gods that Karl will stay frozen until he can get to him.

#koolish #foolish gamers #c!foolish #karl jacobs #c!karl #pom talks #angst #I hope you guys are okay with my angsty ideas #they're my favorite uvu #dtk+ dragon au

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daydreamdnn · 10 months

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at long last here is my fic for the @dtqkbigbang !!!

i had a lot of fun working on it :]

#c!snf #c!sapnap #c!georgenotfound #c!karl jacobs #it's c!georgenap angst with a happy(ish) ending #36k words o7 #i cried while i was writing it so yea read it it's lots of fun i promise >:]#dtqkbigbang

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rutadales · 1 year

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hey don't cry... crunchtrio, okay?

#c!karl #c!foolish #c!tina #crunchcraft #root draws #no more angst!! happy times ONLY!#<- is still drawing that angst dsmp comic #i need to ink and color it still pensive emoji #she's scolding them for dying 🙄#also I like giving tinza gardening gloves i think they're cute

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azurecake16 · 1 year

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Hear me out…what if Karlnapitys limbos are all just reflections of each other? Karl’s can be an empty city (fear of forgetting his fiancés and loosing him self, based of Quackity), Quackitys can be fire (everything he’s ever loved has burnt, Sapnap) and Sapnap’s can be a time loop (fear of loosing people, Karl)

#karlnapity #dsmp angst #azures ramblings #c!sapnap #c!karl #c!quackity #DSMP limbo #wheeee

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cr0wseye · 1 year

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sapnap spent his last moments as the egg took over and the nukes dropped dragging karl over to las nevadas btw, if you even care.

#karlnapity #cfiances #csapnap #c!sapnap #ckarl #c!karl #c!quackity #cquackity #ckarl jacobs #c!karl jacobs #angst #I do not know enough about either of these endings to be talking about them but I dont care lol this is a fiances blog

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10piecechickenmcnugget · 2 years

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day 24: dancing!! don’t mind them they’re just being idiots (affectionate)

#The next prompt is angst so take this before I break your hearts #karl jacobs #c!karl jacobs #karl jacobs fanart #sapnap #c!sapnap #sapnap fanart #quackity #c!quackity #quackity fanart #karlnapity #karlnapitober #dsmp #dream smp

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chizue-witchery · 2 years

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⚜️. *. ⋆ Fandom: Dream SMP

⚜️. *. ⋆ Pairing: Alexis | Quackity/Karl Jacobs/Sapnap

⚜️. *. ⋆ Character/s: Karl Jacobs, Sapnap, Alexis | Quackity, Dream SMP Ensemble (mentioned)

⚜️. *. ⋆ Summary: Karl stands still, blankly staring at the destroyed Egg while the blood vines are withering away as it disintegrates into nothing. He doesn't look anywhere else, afraid that The Egg will come back to life and command those in control to kill the remaining members in the server.

But when he turns around and looks at his fiancés, all he can think about is that everything will be okay now that he's with them.

⚜️. *. ⋆ Word Count: 3,050

⚜️. *. ⋆ Warnings/Tags: post-apocalypse au, post-canon, aged-up characters, tales from the smp references, angst, fluff, hurt/comfort, angst with happy ending

⚜️. *. ⋆ Prompts/Squares Filled: "We'll figure it out." || 100 Ways to say "I Love You" Challenge Prompt#36 • Kisses, Angst, Comfort, Happy Ending || Karlnapitober Day 1, 25, 27 & 30

100WTSILY Masterlist

AO3

A/N: my entry for karlnapitober!!!! it was supposed to be out yesterday but the power went out.... but here's food for c!karlnapity enjoyers. it's a happy ending for them. anyways — likes, comments, and reblogs are appreciated <3

Karl stands still, blankly staring at the destroyed Egg while the blood vines are withering away as it disintegrates into nothing. He doesn't look anywhere else, afraid that The Egg will come back to life and command those in control to kill the remaining members in the server.

So.

He doesn't move even though he could hear people crying tears of joy, relieved that it's finally over. That they can finally rest after an apocalypse that lasted for almost three years; of trying to find a way to defeat The Egg; losing their loved ones, either succumbing to The Egg or being murdered by the Eggpire members; hiding inside caves and ravines so those who remain wouldn't get caught; arguments and fighting between the remaining ones; and alliances and friendships being formed, the more they spent time together.

But it's over—

Karl doesn't have to worry about The Egg anymore or having to resort to live underwater because the contamination was too much. The Lost City of Mizu wouldn't happen anymore because The Egg is gone

(But it almost happened a year and a half ago. Ranboo was the one who suggested it and Karl did everything in his power to convince others not to resort to that. Unfortunately, he failed and that's when he had no other choice to but to reveal to them that he's a time traveller and he's seen the future.

Just as he expected then, many were outraged at him, demanding to know why he wasn't able to prevent certain events from happening; one of them being The Egg taking over the entire server.

Karl did his best to explain to all of them how his ability to travel back in time works and, along with Quackity's help, he was able to. There are those who are still upset about it, but Karl silently thanks them for not voicing out their thoughts.)

Dream's location is still unknown. No one knows where he went off to and the last time Karl has seen him was over a year ago, when he was gathering samples of the blood vines to experiment ways to kill it without moving to another place. Dream said nothing to him, but gave him a nod before leaving. No words were spoken between them and that was the last sighting they had of Dream.

But Karl doesn't (tries not to) worry about that. Dream has gone off who knows where, most likely leaving far, far away from this server. Maybe he realizes how far gone this server is — but Karl doesn't know Dream enough to lead to that conclusion.

Even though The Egg is gone and Dream is someone they don't have to worry about anymore—

Why does it still feel like he has more to do?

That this isn't the end, but just the beginning of an even bigger threat that will come to this server (or has it been here since the very beginning?)

His hand twitches, hovering over the golden pocket watch on the side of his pants. He doesn't know what he'll do once he gets a hold of it, but something must be telling him it still isn't over if he's reacting like this, right?

There's still a threat, but he doesn't know who or what the threat is. But he's prepared to go back in time and prevent it from happening even if he is so, so exhausted from defeating The Egg.

A hand rests on his shoulder and Karl turns around like a whiplash. Anyone would've been worried that he might've broken his neck with how fast he turned his head around. Karl prepared himself to be attacked, to be met with blood-red eyes and tell him he failed to save the timeline again and stab him, but—

Karl was not prepared to look at Sapnap's soft, yet worried, gaze. His eyes aren't blood-red anymore, they're back to the dark-colored eyes he recognizes and loves. Karl blinks, almost in disbelief of it. "Sapnap…?" he quietly says, afraid that he is still dreaming and he'll wake up back in the cold, cold ravine.

"You back with us, pretty boy?" Sapnap asks with a smile, somehow looking at Karl softer. Karl's eyes flicker to the figure behind Sapnap and he realizes Quackity is standing behind him, hovering like he doesn't know what to do but also looking at him with worry.

Karl frowns when he notices the bandage wrapped around Quackity's chest, but he doesn't seem to have any major injuries, so Karl tries (and fails) not to worry any further. He looks back at Sapnap, too exhausted after everything yet on edge that something bad might happen.

"Is it over?" Karl asks instead of answering Sapnap's question, looking around for any signs of threats that might require him to go back in time, his hands twitching once again at the golden pocket watch. "Are we — Is The Egg finally dead?"

"It's over," Quackity answered while holding Karl's hands, keeping them away from the golden pocket watch. Karl didn't realize that Quackity and Sapnap moved closer to him, supporting him when he stumbled, the exhaustion suddenly weighing him down.

"It's over…" Karl whispers, too quiet for anyone except the three of them to hear. He smiles wobbly while tears are forming in the corner of his eyes. "It's over…" he repeats, but somewhat louder this time.

At first, he couldn't believe it. Why would he? It's been years since peace happened and he doesn't remember what it feels like to be at peace anymore. He's damaged, with scars all over him. He's not the same person back then when he was still optimistic, yet naïve about his new-gained ability to travel back in time.

But Sapnap nor Quackity doesn't laugh and tell him it's just a joke and something's happening outside. It's really over.

Then–

Karl sobs, hugging two of his fiancés while letting his legs give up as he falls to the ground, dragging his fiancés with him. He cries, a heavy weight lifted off of his shoulders now that he's finally done his job and saved the server from destroying itself. After going through so many timelines, surviving through every moment of disaster that comes, he finally can settle on one timeline instead of being forced to be away from his fiancés and settle in other versions of them.

"This doesn't feel real," he choked out through the laughter bubbling in his throat while he could feel himself being pulled closer to them, the tears being wiped away despite it not stopping. "This–" he looks up and they look at him with worry in their eyes while they're also smiling through tears– "This doesn't feel real."

Sapnap and Quackity look at each other with a frown when they hear Karl's statement before looking back at him. They can understand why, especially Quackity, who stayed by his side while Sapnap was infected. Even he still doesn't believe that it's finally over.

"It's real," Sapnap whispers, being the living proof of it. He's not infected anymore. The vines that are wrapped around his arms and legs are gone. The color of his clothing is also back to normal. "I'm real."

And yet, Karl still looks at Sapnap, not believing those words, and he wants to comfort him about it. So Sapnap caresses Karl's cheeks, frowning slightly when he notices the flinch. He was about to remove his hand off of his cheek but Karl relaxes, removing the tension from his shoulders.

Warm, Karl thought, when Sapnap's hand is on his cheek. Not cold, warm. So very warm yet welcoming. Warm like fire, but it feels like home. He's home.

Sapnap leans closer, tilting his head while closing his eyes as their lips pressed together. Karl closes his eyes, tears slipping down even more while kissing him back. Sapnap's kisses are always gentle whenever he wants to comfort either of his fiancés, always careful not to hurt the two of them. They pull apart, Karl's eyes fluttering open with an even wobblier smile while Sapnap moves, waiting for Quackity's approval before gently kissing him, too, while cupping his cheek. Theirs lasted a few seconds longer before pulling apart.

This, somehow, makes Karl giddy and almost shoves Sapnap out of the way to get his turn, inching closer to Quackity. Quackity laughs, eyes fluttering while he and Karl stare at each other for a good while. Then, Quackity wipes away the tears in the corner of Karl's eyes, not wanting to see him cry even more. They've done this a lot while they were hiding underground from The Egg and yet— Karl still gently cups Quackity's cheek, his thumb caressing the scar because he knows what Quackity thinks about it. He leans down and waits for Quackity's approval before closing his eyes and kissing him.

It's always slow and gentle with the three of them during moments like this, always needing the comfort and reassuring words that come along hugs, kisses, and cuddles until it's enough. But even then, it's never enough for the three of them.

Karl and Quackity pull apart, almost breathless while opening their eyes. Then breaks out into full laughter when Sapnap wrapped his arms around them while whining about missing more kisses. They don't hesitate to give Sapnap what he wants, turning their attention to him and kisses him everywhere; the lips, eyelids, cheek, nose, hand, arms, forehead—everywhere. It makes Sapnap laugh, despite being very flustered with the sudden attention all over him, but he doesn't mind it, also moving to give more kisses to his two fiancés.

Now they're all just holding each other, never letting go while pressing all of their foreheads together as they try to catch their breaths. They're just… content to be all together after years of conflict and being apart from each other. They're all grown up now and changed—but the one thing that stays the same or grew even more was the love that they have for each other. Even when they left to make their own country for the other, miscommunications happening left and right, or secrets that they kept from each other, that never stopped the longing they had for their presence.

Even though the silence is enough for them, Karl is the first one to break it. "I miss you so much, Sap…" he whispers, tears forming in the corner of his eyes. "It was so hard—" his voice breaks, squeezing his eyes shut while lowering his head. "I thought we wouldn't be able to find a way to defeat The Egg and you would've been controlled by it forever, along with the others…" that we have no other choice but to kill you and the other infected members….

And it reminded him way too much of what happened at the Masquerade, when The Egg was still young yet glowing vibrantly red. When he saw James's dead body that night, all he felt was dread because he reminded him so, so much of Sapnap; from his laughter to the way he speaks and his body language.

Someone slowly lifts his head up and Karl opens his eyes to see that it was Sapnap who did it, a gaze that's always so soft and loving compared to the blood-red eyes that look wrong. Sapnap moves his hand to Karl's cheek and Karl leans into it, closing his eyes as he exhales softly before opening them once again to look at Sapnap.

"I'm here," Sapnap says while his other hand caresses Quackity's cheek, looking between the two of them. "I'm home." Back to you, he doesn't say, but they already know what he means.

They soften at his words; Karl with his goofy smile while Quackity's cheeks are rose-colored.

"You're being sappy, Sapnap~" Karl giggled, to which Sapnap nervously smiled in response.

"Sapnap, Karlos." They turn to look at Quackity. "Te quiero mucho…" Despite not understanding Spanish, the way Quackity whispers it to them sounds endearing and so in love, showing his vulnerability only to them.

They both smile at Quackity before tackling him, having their own makeshift cuddle pile despite being near withering blood vines. Their arms wrapped around Quackity while peppering his face with kisses, with Quackity trying to move them away while laughing.

"We have to go to the others, mi amor," he laughed, not putting much effort in pushing them off of him.

"We can stay here for a little longer," Karl snuggled closer to Quackity, nuzzling him with a contented smile. The Egg and its withering blood vines are still bothering him, but he can tune it out if his fiancés are there with him. He's exhausted, yet so, so happy that they're here with him.

"No, no, Quackity is right," Sapnap agreed, even though he's still clinging on to him while his eyes are closed. "We need to check if any of us need medical attention."

Karl shakes his head, burying his face in Quackity's chest while clinging to him tighter. "We'll worry about that later…" a yawn escapes his lips, "... let's just stay here for a while. The Egg is dead and we don't have to worry about it attacking us."

"I need to change my bandages, Karl." Quackity ruffles Karl's hair, making Karl lean closer to him. "You need to get up." Then he turns to Sapnap. "You too, cariño."

Sapnap groans but he got off of Quackity and stood up, stomping on the blood vines that were close to them. Then he bends down, wrapping his arms around Karl and lifts him up, much to the annoyance of his fiancé, but Karl didn't fight him when Sapnap got him off of Quackity.

Quackity stands up, getting rid of the dirt on his clothes while Sapnap drops Karl, forcing him to stand up as well. Karl huffs, crossing his arms while looking at Sapnap, slightly irritated that he's off of Quackity.

But that didn't last long, as Karl held no grudges against it, and turned around to look at The Egg once more, making sure that it stayed dead. Quackity and Sapnap grabs Karl's hands and he allows himself to be dragged away from The Egg by his fiancés as he watches it disappear from his field of vision. Then he turns to Sapnap and Quackity, smiling brightly at the two of them; all worry and hopelessness disappearing from the moment he looks at them. He intertwines his hands with theirs, swaying them while walking closer until their shoulders are bumping each other.

"What are doing to do next?" Karl asks once they've stepped out of The Egg room and back to the surface, the relief showing in his face when the blood vines are withering and disappearing. He doesn't remember the last time he's seen the SMP without the vines surrounding the buildings, along with the stench of smell that came out of it.

It's very refreshing to see it going back to before The Egg has taken over. But the buildings are still destroyed, yet somewhat recognizable. It's a mess but this isn't the first time it has happened in the SMP.

Sapnap looks at the SMP, seeing the blood vines gone has been a breath of fresh air. He vaguely remembers what happened during the time of being controlled and he didn't like it one bit. He hurt them.

"We'll figure it out," Quackity answers for the two of them, smiling when he sees Tommy waving at him while his other arm is in a sling. He squeezes Karl's hand in reassurance while Quackity looks at the two of them, trying to remember when was the last time they were all together like this.

Years, his mind supplies and Quackity wants to spend the rest of his time with them to compensate for the years of being apart from each other.

"Like we always do," Sapnap adds with a nod, looking at them just like he did back when they were first engaged with one another; with love and joy that can't seem to fit inside of him.

We'll get through this, Karl thinks while getting closer to the tent, grinning while Karl drags his fiancés over to Ponk, setting them down while she checks if they have any injuries to tend on.

Niki comes over to Karl, handing him baked goods made by hers truly, then moves on to the others to give them baked goods after a long, long day. Karl smiles at her before he takes a bite of the cookie, not realizing how hungry he was. Her cookies were always the best ones.

He takes a seat next to his fiancés, watching them be checked by Ponk while handing them Niki's treats to eat. They thank Karl before they start eating it. Karl has a soft expression while he looks at them before turning to look at the rest of the remaining members, all of them helping each other out.

A part of him wonders if there's going to be a war happening now that The Egg is dead, but another part of him thinks that it may take a year or more before it happens since everyone is still recovering from the years worth of trauma. They're going to need a lot of therapy after this.

Karl takes out his golden pocket watch, listening at it ticks and wonders if the god is going to pull him out of this timeline and tell him that it's is not the right ending for them.

But that never happens, even when he stares at the golden pocket watch. There's no portal appearing out of nowhere to drag him back to XD's World nor is there any sign of it happening.

A tear slips out of his eye, landing on the golden pocket watch while he smiles.

It's over.

They can finally rest easy…

Karl wipes the tear droplet from the golden pocket watch glass with his sleeve, then closes it and hides it back in his pocket.

Foolish comes by and sits next Karl. "You doin' alright?" He asked with a worried expression while wrapping an arm around Karl.

"Yeah." Karl nods and leans on Foolish's shoulder, closing his eyes as he exhales softly with a smile. "I'm doing just fine…"

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qsmp-slime · 2 years

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leave you wondering why they can't have just been.. normal?

#suburbia overture #boatsart #dsmp #dreamsmp #sapnap #c!sapnap #karl jacobs #c!karl #quackity #c!quackity #karlnapity #angst tw #rb > likes #sapnap fanart #karl jacobs fanart #quackity fanart #(song is by will wood)

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chloeisokay · 1 year

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Karl AU angst for the soul

I don’t have TikTok so it goes here

#dream smp #bad art #mcyt fandom #c!karl #mention of Sapnap #dsmp angst #angst #au #Karl is dying #that one bmo sound from TikTok #yes I used capcut I am poor

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thekingwhowouldhavebeen · 2 years

Text

“Amnesia Was His Name”

Inspiration Credit to this Amazing Fanfic: A Second Chance From Beyond The Grave

-Please note this is only inspiration but this Au/Idea is very separated from the fanfic listed above. There are small similarities but a lot of key differences! Thank you for understanding-

Please ask questions if you’d like! I would adore answering any/all questions you have about the world building of this au and the characters and history all of you can find and see! Also, sorry if it feels kinda all over the place, I am just going and writing as the ideas come to me!

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“Amnesia Was His Name”

-Soma is his name, or the name he goes by. He knows he has another name, he can’t remember it though. He wishes he could.

-The dream’s, nightmares really, are a comfort almost. It’s the one constant in his life. The dreams that leave him screaming with terror, his heart pounding in his chest before mournfully curling into a ball as he tries to piece together the small fragments that have stuck in his head, or write them down before he forgets. Nightmares he started having at the ripe age of 2 years old.

-However it’s only small, almost useless details that he remembers. Glasses. White eyes. A man who seemed to be kissed by fire. A boy who wanted to be a man. A wicked smile. Goats. Things that ever made sense when put together, and yet he always seems to dream about them.

-He also often feels a calling of sorts. Things that seem familiar to him in ways that they shouldn’t. He love the Arthurian legends, reading about King Arthur and Merlin, Uther Pendragon and Morgana. But his favorite is reading about the sword in the stone. Though, he swears on his life they always draw the sword wrong. They never get it right. Ad it’s name wasn’t Excalibur, but he couldn’t tell you what it’s real name is supposed to be.

-He remembers watching Sleeping Beauty, and had to look away when he saw Aurora sleeping on her bed. Feeling broken hearted, but not for the character on the screen. These feelings were tied to something he doesn’t remember and how his heart aches for the longing he feels.

-He can’t stand fire. Ever since he was young, the fear of the flame has always been there. He remembers his aunt telling him when he was just a baby in her arms, he cried when her husband lit a lighter to light up a cigar, and only calmed down when the flame went away.

-He can’t describe the pain he goes through with his body in any way other than feeling ‘broken’. Sometimes his limbs feel like they are twisted, his nerves frayed and on fire and yet looking at his arms and legs and see there fine almost makes him more sick than his stomach. He feels like he’s covered in wounds, gashes and broken bones and the pain is so strong all he can do is lay there helplessly, praying to something, anything, for the pain to go away.

-His parents, in a fit of kindness, got him checked out for it once. The doctors couldn’t find the source an simply stated it was “Psychosomatic”. Aka, why he goes by Soma. He refuses to go by the name given by his parents anymore.

-His body doesn’t look right either. Nothing looks or feels right about him. His hands feel to dainty, small. His legs don’t feel like their the right shape. His hair is black, it’s too dark. His eyes shouldn’t be blue. His teeth feel to flat. He feels to short.

-However, during his travels, there are three rules Soma doesn’t even remember putting into place. Well, are they rules? Limitations? He doesn’t entirely know what to call them, but here they are: 1. There is a man that cannot have the book. No matter what. (What book? What man? He doesn’t know) 2. He will not regret it. He doesn’t regret it, and he will not change it. (What? What won’t he change, why doesn’t he regret it?) 3. All he wants is a family. He doesn’t deserve it. (And it seems he never will)

-He’s around 23 when he first meets someone he swears he knows. A man with soft brown hair and a kind smile, wearing colorful clothing. Soma was at a coffee shop when he saw him. He was a barista working there, his nametag calling him Karl. His head hurt looking at him. He made his drink and it was some of the best coffee he ever had, and he kept returning. It was because of Karl that Dream stayed in this small town for so long. Yet Karl never said anything, even as they became friends. Seeing each other every morning.

-Then Soma had to leave. He couldn’t stay anymore. Karl cried when he left. He felt sorry for leaving.

-The next person he saw made him freeze. He didn’t know why, but he simply could not bare to speak to him. The feeling of hurt, of betrayal. Of an isolation so painful all he could do was hit club by club because he couldn’t brush off the feeling that this would be the last person he would be allowed to speak with. He left that town immediately when he saw him.

-It took almost two years when he meets Sapnap and George. Much like Karl, he seems to know them, but they never seem to recognize him. Not for a while at least, long enough that Soma accepts that they may not know him in the way he knows them. However, he doesn’t know what set them off, to make them realize. All he hears is the faint whisper of a word he’s heard all his life, but for the first time he hears it in a different way. “Dream?”

-Soma freezes. Dream? Is that his name? It feels familiar, and it’s almost a flash but he can faintly see the imagine of an incredibly scarred man in his head.

-”Is that my name?”

“You really don’t remember do you?”

“Should I?”

“We all do”

Part 1 of ???

This is all I can write down rn! This au makes brain go brr and there are so many elements to it but I gotta figure out how to write it all down properly! Anyways, enjoy what I have rn

#dreblr #DREAM ANGST #dreamsmp #c!dream #angst #Amnesia Was His Name AU #c!karl #mcyt sapnap #mcyt dream #mcyt #mcyt george

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ctntduoarchive · 2 years

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praying for c!quackity to go to c!sapnap (who came to las nevadas for him even though he thought that c!quackity got the invite to kinoko and decided not to come) after las nevadas goes bye bye 🤞

#probably not. Probably more angst #also! one ctntduo mention for the brain worms #would be appreciated #just my HOPEFUL predictions #the idea of him going to kinoko? is making me think of a fix it fic.#this would then be the second one in my wips #ALSO! him seeing c!karl and them ignoring each other originally then relearning how to love each other.... <- very ill

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princessmisery666 · 11 months

Note

Please don't leave. Jensen Ackles and reader

Please Don't Leave

Summary: Friends to lovers to friends, that can work, right?

Warnings/Genres/Troupes: angst, fluff, Jensen in his thicc Soldier Boy era (that’s a warning in itself!)

W/C: 4.3k

Characters: Jensen Ackles, Jared Padalecki. Small Parts/Mentioned: Karl Urban, Jack Quaid, Gen Padalecki.

Pairing: Jensen Ackles x reader (you - no descriptions of body type or ethnicity).

Notes: For the purpose of this fic, Jensen is not and never has been married.

A/N: This drabble got way out of hand.

Betas: @deanwinchesterswitch // any mistakes belong to me.

Graphics: Title card Jensen photo credit - https://twitter.com/_AlanaKing_ Soldier Boy image from Variety. Fly video belongs to me.

Master Lists: Dean Winchester // Main // Made Up Fic Titles

“Help me understand,” you implore.

The first domino to set off the chain reaction was in the form of a famous and beautiful actress, Mae Nova, sliding into Jensen’s DM’s—a very detailed offer with an accompanying photo that you saw by no fault of your own. How is irrelevant. Why is the issue. Why didn’t he delete it or immediately set her straight?

“You’re the one that wanted this, Jay,” you say when he remains silent. “You're the one who pursued me, convinced me we should try and turn the ten years of friendship into something more.”

“I know.” He sighs, pushing a hand through his longer hair. “And I don’t regret a second of the last six months we’ve been together…” he doesn’t say it; however, the ‘but’ demands attention like a flickering light.

“But you're having second thoughts?”

“No!” he denies vehemently, finally looking you in the eye. “Don’t put words in my mouth.”

“Well, one of us has to!”

He shakes his head, exhaling loudly. “I’m sorry,” he repeats, sounding like a broken record. His heart rate is running high, and his chest heaves with every breath, but his vocabulary appears to be running low.

You tsk, fighting back a scathing comment about needing a script writer to make him talk. But it wouldn’t be fair. He’s not a man who runs from his emotions. He’s just trying to make sense of it all like you are. You have to remind yourself he’s not Dean Winchester. He doesn’t look much like him anymore either; longer hair, beard growing almost wildly, no plaid in sight in the Soldier Boy wardrobe at the back of the fancy trailer.

Is that where the lines blurred? Working together for so long on Supernatural, have you both confused the other for your characters and their feelings toward the other?

“You can stop saying your sorry. I forgive you,” you say, and he turns a watery gaze your way. It almost breaks your resolve, but you realize it’s down to you to be the strong one. “I just need to understand why? Why didn’t you reply and tell her you're in a relationship? You’ve done it a hundred times before.”

“I don’t know.”

To make matters worse, Mae had landed a role on The Boys and would be working alongside Jensen.

“Jensen, you spent fifteen years of your life devoted to Supernatural, ten of those with me around. I think you were scared of the end, afraid of losing such a big part of yourself.”

“I was,” he agrees, in a whisper as if you speaking the words is the reason for his realization of it being the truth.

“Maybe us being together was a knee-jerk reaction?” you suggest, “a way to cling onto the past.” You take a deep breath, and your chest tightens as if begging yourself not to say the next part. “Maybe you need a clean break, see what the world looks like without Supernatural… without me.”

“What? No.” He looks offended but can’t hold eye contact and doesn’t offer anything further.

You can’t keep going around in circles, so you make a decision, sitting down at the small table and firing up your laptop.

“What’re you doing?” he asks, rushing to look over your shoulder, perhaps worried you’ll take it upon yourself to reply to the woman. “Searching for flights back home?” Jensen says, panic clear in his tone. Harshly he slams the laptop shut, and you look up at him. “You can’t leave.”

“Give me a reason to stay.”

“Me, us!” he yells, “we can work this out.”

You stand up and gently press your lips to his. Jensen’s hand automatically goes to the small of your back, guiding you around the chair to better press himself against you.

The kiss is natural and unhurried, but there’s too much tension in his body, and you know it’s because he feels it, too. This is your last kiss.

A little breathless, you pull back. “I don’t wanna fight, Jensen.”

“Me neither.”

“So let me be the bad guy,” you say, heart aching but trying to hold it together. “Let me walk away before the wound is too big to save our friendship.”

He grimaces as if tasting something bitter but nods once, “I’m sorry.”

It’s been a long day. All Jensen wanted to do was take a shower and crash, but Karl convinced him to go for dinner with the cast and crew.

The conversation is light, everyone enjoying their food and making small talk. It’s nice enough, but it’s incomplete because you're not there.

He wishes it was you beside him instead of Mae. The seating arrangements have no rhyme or reason. It just happened that way. But still, he almost resents that she’s the one next to him. So much has happened in the weeks since he last saw you. He wants to share it all with you, and wants to know how you are - if you’re struggling with his absence as much as he is with yours.

“Okay there, Ackles?” Jack asks, “You're a world away.”

“Yeah,” he lies, sitting up straighter and smiling. “Just thinking…”

Karl must know the look of a man missing his significant other because he asks, “About your girl?”

“Yeah,” Jensen admits, sighing heavily. He hasn't told anyone you broke up, and there’s been no speculation in the tabloids.

“Tell us about her. You never did tell us about your first date,” Jack says, “we all know you met on Supernatural, but not the story of your first date.”

Jack’s an awesome guy, sweet and kind, he doesn’t know the reminder is like a kick in the teeth, but Jensen obliges.

Jensen hurried across the lot, a coffee in each hand, the brown paper bag containing two cinnamon rolls dangling from his mouth. He was late, and Jared would give him shit for it, but it would be worth whatever Jared threw at him if it improved your morning.

Your latest Instagram post was a photo of a fly swimming in your coffee with the caption: “It was my last coffee pod. This just topped off a crappy weekend😭. #HappyMonday”. You were one hundred percent a coffee snob. You made it in a particular way using a fancy - and stupidly expensive - machine. You wouldn’t settle for the coffee on set. You’d rather go without. However, Jensen knew when you didn’t get her morning beverage, you’d be grumpy all day, and he hated to see you without a smile.

He headed for the makeup trailer, knowing that’s where you’d be. He kicked the bottom of the door gently as a way of knocking, then waited.

He didn’t expect Jared to be the one to open it. He wasn’t due in makeup for another half-hour, but his lanky frame filled the space of the open door. “Look who decided to show up,” Jared jeered playfully.

“Shut up,” Jensen mumbled around the bag, walking past him.

You were already there, looking through clothes on the rack, but stopped to smile at him. “Morning, Jay.”

“Here,” he said, handing over the coffee that was for you. “Hi, hey, morning.”

Confusion wrinkled your brow, but you took it. “Um, thanks.”

“I saw your Instagram, and I know how cranky you get without your coffee, and you said you had a shit weekend, so I wanted to try and make it better,” Jensen vomited words without thinking. “I don’t like seeing you upset, and you’ve been down a lot lately, and I just thought maybe this would help, some, a little, maybe.” Breathlessly he shrugged and prayed the floor would open up and swallow him.

Your smile beamed, and you lifted the cup to your nose, inhaling the aroma, and hummed contentedly, “Mmm. You even got my order right,” you said and stepped closer to him to place a kiss on his cheek.

“That’s cause you're always posting about it on social media,” quipped Jared.

You tutted, rolling your eyes at your co-star but kept your eyes locked on Jensen. Dropping back down from your tiptoes, you said, “Thank you for this. It means a lot that you thought of me.”

“It’s nothing,” he lied. It was everything, and as your kiss dried on his cheek, it reminded him of your evening plans. “I know you’ve got a long day ahead, especially with your date later.”

As part of a charity event, you had agreed that they auction off a date with you. The auction had been silent, so you had no idea who had hired you for the night. Though the studio had assured you they had vetted the winner, you’d asked that he and Jared be in the bar next door in case of emergency.

“Oh god,” you groaned, “don’t remind me. I wish I never agreed to that stupid silent auction.”

“Ah, don’t be such a downer,” Jared said, winking. “You never know. He might be the man of your dreams.”

Oh god, I hope not. Jensen thought. He’d already had to watch you be in a relationship with Chad, a man who neither deserved you nor treated you well. He couldn’t bear to watch you be with someone else again. He wanted to be next in line, and he would treat you as you should be, like a Queen. He just needed to work up the courage to tell you.

“I doubt it,” you sighed, and Jensen swore your eyes flicked to him and away again. “Besides, who said it’s a man who hired me?”

“C’mon, you two,” Zara, the makeup artist, said, waving them toward the door, “out! I’ve got to get this one ready.”

Amongst a chorus of goodbyes, Jared and Jensen left. “What is it with you when you’re around her?” Jared asked as soon as the trailer door was closed. “You’re a bumbling idiot, and she’s starting to notice.”

“What?”

“Yeah, she asked me what’s wrong with you. Thinks she’s done something wrong ‘cause you either avoid her or barely speak to her.”

“I know, man,” Jensen groaned, scrubbing a hand down his face. “Ever since you put it out there that we could be more than friends, I can't stop thinking about it. I don’t want to blurt it out at the wrong time, so I try to be careful about what I say, but I just end up tripping over myself.”

Jared clapped him on the back, “You just need to fake some of that Dean Winchester confidence.”

“Maybe.”

“You better find a way to be around her ‘cause you’ve got a date with her tonight.”

“What?”

“The silent auction,” Jared explained, “I paid for the date with her for you.”

“Jared, what? No!”

“I think Gen will have an issue if I show up for a date with her, and are you really going to leave her sitting on her own?”

“No, but Jared, I can’t,” Jensen panicked, “I’m going to make a fool of myself.”

“You’re an actor. Just act normal.” Jared suggested before walking off.

Seeing you through the restaurant window, Jensen wanted to hug Jared so tight to thank him he’d crack a rib. But he also wanted to punch him so damn hard in the arm it’d be limp for a week. Why had he agreed to this? Okay, he hadn’t agreed. He’d totally freaked out, drank two beers, took three shots of whiskey, and then forced himself into the waiting car.

He was going to mess this up. He knew it. He was a fumbling, mumbling idiot around you, and dread settled firmly in his gut as he watched you scanning the menu. He regretted the whiskey and allowing Jared to talk him into this.

He swore he was having an out-of-body experience as his feet took him closer to you. You glanced up when he got to the side of the table, and your face glowed with a smile. “Come to check in on me?” you asked, rising and pulling him into a hug.

He held you a little tighter than he usually would, savoring the moment before releasing you and taking a seat. “Not exactly checking up on you,” he said, “this wasn’t my idea, but Jared brought you for me.”

“What?”

“The silent auction, Jared was the highest bidder.”

Confusion took over your features. “Why would he do that? I mean not that I’m not grateful, I’d much rather be here with you, but I don’t understand.”

He realized it was now or never. “‘Cause he knows how I feel about you,” he admits, holding his breath for a reaction.

“Care to elaborate?” you ask after a long silence.

“The truth is, I like you... a lot.”

“I like you too.”

“No,” he shook his head, “you don’t get it. I cherish our friendship and don’t want to lose it, but it's more than that. My feelings for you go beyond friendship, and I want to see if we could be more.”

“I was so nervous,” Jensen chuckles. “I felt like I was auditioning for the rest of my life.” he contemplates it for a moment, “maybe I was.”

“Well then, it’s good she reciprocated,” Karl laughs.

“It took her a minute,” Jensen remembers, “but yeah, she came around.”

Your phone rings as you slot the key into your door’s lock. You’re juggling coffee, a pile of scripts to read, dry cleaning, and a bag of groceries. You have no hope of answering without dropping everything, so leave it to ring. You assume it’s Jared checking in on you after seeing the photos on TMZ. Jensen and Mae were pictured at a restaurant in Ontario.

The phone stops as you enter the kitchen and set everything down on the countertop.

Gen had already checked in to make sure you were okay, and you’d been anticipating a call from Jared to yet again invite you out to the set of Walker to meet one of the crew he was insistent you’d “hit it off with.” You’d politely declined, having already been on a date that had been pleasant and ended with a goodnight kiss, but you’d told the Padalecki’s it had left you feeling guilty as if you were cheating on Jensen. You needed time to let that feeling pass and allow the wound to heal completely.

You set about emptying the bags of groceries, and your phone rings again. You shuffle the contents of your bag, looking for the device, sure that it will cut off to voicemail before you find it.

“Hello,” you answer, pressing it to your ear.

“Hey.”

Jensen’s voice freezes you to the floor, and you hold your breath. It’s been more than a month since you left him in his trailer, and you’ve only exchanged a few text messages. Why is he calling now? Does he want to be the one to confirm that he and Mae are together?

He says your name when your silence stretches.

“Um, yeah. Hey, hi,” you say, clearing your throat to rid yourself of the shock.

“You sound out of breath,” he notes, “is this a bad time?”

“No, no, I just wasn’t expecting it to be you,” you explain, “caught me off guard.”

“Who were you expecting?” he asks, sounding accusatory.

“Jared,” you sneer, unable to stop the ire you feel.

“Sorry,” he says, and the apology tightens your jaw with the frustration it evokes. “I should have called sooner.”

“I haven’t called you either.”

No one is to blame for the lack of communication. You both needed some space, so you were both right not to call.

Neither of you speaks for a moment, and you debate whether to tell him you're busy so you can end the call and be done with the awkwardness. But he obviously put his awkwardness aside to call, so you might as well rip the stitches out and reopen the wound if that's what this is about.

“Why are you calling now?”

“I need you to know that me and Mae aren’t together,” he says, firm and direct.

You try to interrupt, “Jensen, it’s fine.” but he determinedly continues.

“The picture they posted was cropped,” he explains. “The whole cast and some of the crew were there. The photo made it look like it was just the two of us, and that’s not the truth.”

“Even if it was, it’s okay.” It’s not okay, and from the moment you saw it, you’ve felt nauseous. Still, you assure him, “You’re free to do what you want. You don’t owe me an explanation.”

He sighs, and you can hear the scowl in his tone, “It’s important to me that you know.”

You think it’s sweet that he’s taking the time to explain himself, even if it’s not what you expected. But Mae was never the problem. The situation she presented only shone a light into the crack that you had both been ignoring. Yet the information that Jensen has shared is a welcomed relief in the wake of the storm, but it’s just the eye. More questions are coming, questions that will likely only cause more hurt and confusion.

“Why?” you ask, “why do you want me to know?”

“Because I wanted it to be you next to me…” he pauses.

You're not sure if he wants you to say something or read between the lines, but you can’t let yourself trust the spark of hope that jabs your heart like a pinprick.

“Even if we’re just friends,” he adds.

That pinprick pierces the thin shell you’d managed to build, and it feels like a thousand jagged pieces of glass lacerate your heart, and you chew your top lip to stop the emotion from escaping in a sob.

There’s a loud bang on his end of the line, and someone calls out, “We’re ready on set, Mr. Ackles.”

“I gotta go,” he says.

“Okay,” you say, and immaturely add, “Bye, buddy,” before hanging up.

The party has been a monumental success. You helped Gen, along with a professional party planner, to pull it off.

“So you really had no idea?” You ask Jared once everyone seems to have greeted him and wished him a very happy fortieth birthday. Technically it's not his birthday for another four hours, but the surprise party had needed that early element to make sure it went off without a hitch.

“None,” Jared says, smiling. “I was fully prepared to fly home tomorrow to spend my birthday with Gen and the kids. I was looking forward to it, actually. I didn’t want a big fuss,” he chuckles, looking around the room, “but I’m glad you helped Gen make a fuss. It’s nice to see all the old faces.”

“Not all of them,” you note sourly, commenting on Jensen’s absence. “He wanted to be here, but you know how tight filming schedules can be.”

“I know,” he nods with a tight, sad smile. “It would have been good to see him. For me, at least.”

“Don’t.”

“It’s my birthday. I’m allowed,” he teases.

“It would have been nice to see him,” you agree before Jared can start in on the lecture. “I think. I don’t know. It’s weird and painful, and maybe I'm better off not seeing him until it’s not weird and painful.”

He laughs, pulling you into a hug. “Sounds like you have it all under control.”

“Absolutely.”

You mingle with old friends from Supernatural and new friends from the Walker set. The crew member, a camera operator named Vince, is as cute as Jared promised him to be, and you find yourself tucked in a corner talking with him as the night continues.

You hear the cheerful reunion before you see it. People applaud and shout greetings as Jensen crosses the room and embraces Jared in a tight hug. They hug for a long time, whispered words exchanged between brothers, and you see Jared’s eyes tear up. His night is complete now that Jensen is here.

A few people greet Jensen with hugs and shakes of his hand, but his eyes never seem to focus on them. He distractedly looks around them and seems disappointed when he sees the next person waiting to greet him.

You mostly manage to keep your focus on Vince, but you can see Jensen in your peripheral. You don’t react, but you notice when he finds you. He stares for a long moment, maybe hoping you’ll feel his eyes on you and look at him, but you don’t, and he doesn’t approach.

You're doing nothing wrong, but an uneasiness sneaks up on you. It’s not that you feel like you're somehow betraying Jensen. It’s that you're betraying yourself by denying how you feel. It wouldn’t be fair to start anything with anyone new right now. They’d be a rebound.

Vince seems to notice your focus has shifted and politely parts ways with you.

You spy Jensen across the room, catching up with Brianna, and head for the bar, needing something more potent than wine to make it through the rest of the night.

If possible, Jensen seems to have grown broader, arm muscles bulky beneath the material of his shirt, and you're definitely a fan of the Soldier Boy look. He looks good with a now-trimmed beard and long hair. The sight sends an ache of loneliness through your chest, remembering how it felt to be wrapped in those arms.

A shot turns into two, and when the bartender steps away to refill your wine glass, you feel the air next to you shift. You don’t have to turn to see who it is, the cologne gives him away, and as it arrests your senses, he nudges his shoulder into yours. The familiar heat of his body makes your chest tighten. You so desperately want to turn and embrace him, but you know your fragile emotions would crumble under the weight.

“Whiskey, neat,” he tells the bartender, his voice deep and gruff. He turns his body towards you, one arm resting on the bar, and you sip your drink, silently wishing it was hard liquor again instead of wine.

“Hey,” he says when you don’t look at him.

“Hi,” you respond blandly.

“How are you? You look good.”

“So do you. Really. You look incredible,” you say, without actually looking him in the eyes.

“I hate having to do the diet and exercise thing, though,” he chuckles, “it was so much easier when all I had to do was wear flannel.”

You laugh, but it's bittersweet because everything was easier when he was wearing flannel. “How’s it all going? Stepping into the shoes of a new character?”

“Daunting, but fun.” Jensen talks, and you do all you can to listen and engage but can’t bring yourself to fully meet his eyes.

He says your name so delicately it feels like a caress that sends a shiver through you. You close your eyes and know what he’s asking before he pleads, “Please look at me.”

His eyes have always been mesmerizing, and you know if you gaze into them, the spell will be cast, and there will be no escaping him, even when he’s miles away again. He waits for a beat, but your eyes remain firmly shut, and he closes the space between you, demanding attention.

His exhale wafts through your hair. It’s too close because it's not close enough, and you feel the heartache rising in your chest.

“It was good to see you, Jensen,” you flash a smile in his general direction, picking up your glass.

“Wait,” he says, grabbing your wrist as you turn your back to him. “Don’t leave.”

You freeze in place and turn to look at his hand cuffing your wrist. Slowly you raise your gaze from his hold to his face, preparing yourself for the enchantment of his eyes, but his sad expression is downcast. His chest heaves with a deep breath before he finally looks at you, despondence turning to tentative hope.

“I know I should have said it back then, but I’m saying it now.” His voice is nearly a whisper beneath the muted conversation and ambient music, but it’s clear as a bell to your ears. “Please, don’t leave.”

You turn back to face him, and he takes two deep breaths before he finds the words.

“The last couple of months, I’ve been miserable without you.” He admits, “I’ve had to fight myself to eat, to work out, to do anything that didn’t involve staying in my trailer with a bottle of whiskey. I know that things are weird, but I realized my hesitance had nothing to do with the ending of Supernatural. Yes, I was scared. But I was scared of how easy it was with you, how much I cared for you, how quickly I realized that I am head over heels in love with you.”

You choke out his name as tears well in your eyes, and he steps forward to swipe the first droplet from your cheek.

“I was ready to tell you I’m in love with you, and you were booking flights home,” the heartache of the reminder dims the light behind his eyes, and he drops his gaze to battle whatever emotion he’s feeling. “That scared me more than anything. I didn’t want to say it in the heat of the moment or on the phone, and I was terrified you didn’t feel the same. It doesn’t matter if you don’t. I need you to know that I love you.”

You don’t have words, unexpectedly wishing you had a script so you don’t say something stupid. Then, just as surprisingly, you realize you don’t need words. You take a half step forward and kiss him. Jensen responds immediately, a hand caressing your cheek and drawing you closer as the other slips around your waist to tug you flush against him.

You tangle your fingers in his hair, and he groans into your mouth. His kiss gets you drunker than any alcohol ever could, and after a moment that could have been a minute or an hour, you feel lightheaded.

Jensen chases you as you pull back, placing swift kisses on your lips and pressing his head against yours.

“Damn, I’ve missed you,” you sigh.

“Well, don’t get used to it,” he says, “I’m never letting you leave me again.”

Tag List Info

Tagging Dean Winchester and Supernatural List. Sorry if you don't like RPF.

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Master Lists: Dean Winchester // Main

#Jensen Ackles #Solider Boy #RPF #RPF FanFic #RPF fanfiction #Jensen Ackles fic #Jensen Ackles RPF fanfic #fluff #angst #dean winchester #spn #supernatural #Jensen Ackles x Reader #Jensen Ackles x You

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