#by the way the last of us part 2 is bad. like so bad. like laughably bad
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Heartbreak Hot Seat | JTK
After seeking refuge at her best friends house, Y/N can’t seem to open up enough to let Josh help her with her troubles. In a twisted turn of events, it appears that his twin brother Jake has the perfect remedy for a broken heart.
Pairing: Jake Kiszka x f!reader
Word Count: 20k
Warnings: SMUT 18+, unprotected sex, fingering (f!receiving), oral (f!receiving), oral (m!receiving), body worshipping, sir kink, impact play, praise, degradation, biting, nipple play, lots (and I mean lots) of dirty talk, lots (can’t stress that enough) of foreplay, body shots, softer sex (compared to what I usually write), overstimulation, multiple orgasm, (sort of) forced orgasm, simultaneous orgasm, begging, very brief and inadvertent mentions of free use kink, slight dom/sub, name calling, touch of angst, mentions of cheating/bad past relationships, breakups, sadness/depression (due to breakups), crying, long emotional talks, drinking, parting, Jake being too sweet for his own good, soft Jake, fluff, swearing, sorry if i miss any!!
hi guys ☺️ i miss writing Jake so much I had to hit you with back to back fics. this is literally porn w plot (over 2/3 of this is just smut I think), so I hope you enjoy this as much as I liked writing it! As always, enjoy, be kind, don’t mind any grammar mistakes 🤍 (I’m so, so happy to be back) (lightly edited 🥰)
“Here, you want to try this?” Josh asked, nudging your arm in hopes of breaking you from your solemn state. You blinked a few times, feeling his elbow on your skin, but his words were far away. They seemed like an echo in an empty room, like you had walked into the place only after he stopped speaking. Breathing seemed like a treacherous task, your bones aching every time your lungs inflated. You stared blankly at his hand, holding a fork in his grasp as he kindly offered you a taste of whatever he was eating. “Jake made it, it’s good.”
Jake made it.
You were sure whatever he made would be good, but the thought of food was worse than sickening to you. You wanted to be kind, to try the meal your friend (even if by extension) had made, especially after he offered you the hospitality for an afternoon hangout his home, but you couldn’t seem to accept the gracious offer. The crowd in the living room was overwhelming, despite only a few bodies being present. The chatter was loud and pulsing against your already busy brain, and Josh’s leg resting against yours was nice, but much more than you could handle in the moment.
Josh knew there was something wrong, but unlike usual, he could not seem to pry it from you. Over the last three nights you had spent crashing in his spare room, he used every ounce of energy to comfort you despite being unaware of what exactly your troubles were. You knew you could reach out to him anytime, talk to him about anything, but right now, it seemed impossible to speak the words aloud.
You had been friends with the boy for what seemed like a lifetime, surviving off his constant company and thriving off his eccentric personality. He stuck by your side through college graduations, career changes, and every challenge life seemed to throw your way. You were a busy woman, and he a busy man, and neither of you had much time for social lives outside of your demanding work schedules. Even so, that fact made your friendship all the stronger, because despite your lack of free time, you always made time for each other.
So when you showed up at his doorstep, 3am and crying while spewing absolute nonsense, he guided you to his spare bedroom and told you that it was yours for as long as you needed. The next morning, he came to check on you only to find you hadn’t slept at all. Hours spent sitting beside you attempting to cheer you up only resulted in further confusion and frustration. Despite his busy life, he cleared his schedule and made it a priority to be with you until you felt better. That afternoon, you managed some small talk, but avoided the elephant in the room. The next day, things felt a little more normal between the two of you. A few jokes were shared, and you even had a movie night in the living room with him and his partner. By then, Josh had vowed to let you speak on your own terms, but was doing everything he could to brighten your mood.
Today, when you woke from a broken and nightmare filled sleep, Josh knocked at your door to ask if you would like to get out of the house. After some internal debate, you decided it might be good for you, it might help you forget the only thing you could seem to think about, even if it was temporary. You showered (with Josh talking through the door and stressing the importance of self-care, of course), changed into some clothes you stuffed into a duffel bag during your quick escape, and the three of you hit the road.
After a short drive, you landed at the door of his twin brother’s house, where you would spend your afternoon. Jake, who you had heard loads of things about, was still a mystery to you. Between conflicting schedules and trying (and failing, sometimes) to find time to hang out with Josh, you never got much of an opportunity to get to know Jake, or even Sam for that matter. You knew he was quieter, a little more reserved than Josh, but was funny and had a heart of gold. You chalked up his praise to being his brother, but you never knew Josh to be a liar about anything. You trusted all he had to say about his brothers, and despite your sadness, you were excited to finally meet them properly, rather than just in passing.
You said a brief hello to Jake at times, mostly when you were leaving Josh’s house and he was heading in. You remembered him to be on the shorter side, but with a breathtaking smile and long, brown hair. When you stepped foot into the house and finally had time to appreciate the man standing in front of you, you understood Jake was a lot more than a pretty smile and long hair. He was stunning, and despite your broken heart, you couldn’t help but stare.
Not long after your brief introduction, the rest of the crowd begin to filter in. Sam and his girlfriend both seemed lovely, and Daniel and the friend he brought with him were just as nice. Jake had made lunch, and whatever it was smelled heavenly even if the thought of food sickened you. After a few hours of laughing and talking, the boys went back for seconds, clearing out the last of the food in the kitchen. The day was dwindling into evening, and you still hadn’t managed to break from your solemn state. You sat, listening to all of the conversations and laughing along to jokes, but didn’t find yourself with enough energy to contribute much.
Josh, clearly picking up on your lack of involvement, was doing all he could to help. Offering food was just another failed attempt of many.
“I’m okay, Josh. Thank you though.” You forced a smile, feeling guilty for your constant rejection. You wanted to tell him so badly, but every time you worked up enough courage to explain it, your words failed you and you thought you might be sick. His sad eyes seemed to be staring into your soul, and it was becoming too much to bear. “I’m, uh, is it okay if I grab something to drink?” You cleared your throat, asking for permission in hopes of changing the subject.
“F’course it is, mama.” He assured you. “You want me to come with you?”
“No, it’s okay.” You assured him, sliding forward and rising to your feet.
“Grab anything in the fridge. I know Jake won’t care.” He said, making sure you didn’t feel bad about taking anything.
“Okay.” You smiled, small but genuine. You didn’t feel deserving of Josh’s kindness, but you were still grateful he cared for you so much. If not for him, you would have nobody to lean on.
Quietly, you walked out of the living room and in the direction of the kitchen Jake had lead you to earlier in the day. When you were alone, you let out a long sigh. The kitchen was decorated nicely, simple but tasteful, and the sweet smell of whatever Jake had cooked was still lingering in the air. Instead of walking to the refrigerator, you took a seat at one of the kitchen chairs pulled out from the table, deciding a minute alone was more important than a glass of water.
You closed your eyes, letting your head fall back on your shoulders. The chatter floating in from the next room was much less overwhelming, and you finally felt like you could breathe without the constant ache in your chest. Just when you felt like you were getting your bearings back, you heard soft footsteps puttering through the hallway. You swallowed the lump in your throat, the same one that was constantly bothering you since you showed up at Josh’s house, and prepared for another round of questions from your best friend. You didn’t turn to face him, figuring he would make himself known in due time.
“Hey, Y/N, right?” The voice was not as familiar to you, and definitely not the voice you thought it would be. You looked over your shoulder, curious as to who was talking. Your eyes landed on Jake, a sheepish smile on his face as he stood by the door.
“Hey, yeah.” You nodded, trying to make yourself friendlier than you felt. It was not Jake making you miserable, or anyone for that matter. You wanted to be having fun, to be getting to know the people most important to your best friend, but the weight on your shoulders made it so hard to enjoy the moment.
“I saw you sneak out, thought I’d come and check in on you.” He explained, careful with his words. “Mind if I sit?” You gave a chuckle, and genuine smile as you listened to his words.
“It’s your kitchen, Jake, f’course you can sit.”
“Right,” he nodded, stepping towards you. “Guess I was wondering if you were up for company, or if you just needed a minute alone. I know it can be a lot to handle when we’re all together.”
“No! You guys are great, guess I’m just not in it today.” You said, knowing he hit the nail straight on the head but you were too nice to admit it. “Come sit, please.” He did as you said, pulling out the chair at the head of the table. He was in perfect view and facing you, giving you ample opportunity to soak in his features as he thought about how to continue the conversation.
“That’s okay, sweetheart. Josh mentioned you were going through a tough time when I called him this morning. We were kinda hoping it would take your mind off whatever’s going on.” You wanted to recoil at the idea of Josh sharing your sorrows with a man you did not know, but the intent was sweet, and you knew Josh would never do anything to harm you. He was just a concerned friend looking for a way to cheer you up. Jake, despite being a near stranger, had enough kindness in his heart to want to help too.
And sweetheart.
You didn’t know the man, nor much about him, but you definitely wouldn’t mind if he called you that again.
“Thank you,” your lips twitched into another smile as you looked down at your hands on the table. “He’s pretty great, isn’t he?”
“Josh?” Jake asked for clarification that he heard right, raising his eyebrow at you. You gave a small nod, almost wanting to laugh at his incredulous tone. “Yeah, I mean I guess. I kind of have to agree, cause he’s my brother and all.” At that, a genuine laugh filled the air, the first one that left your lips in days. Jake was hung on your laugh the minute it left your lips, finding the sound addicting despite just having heard it for the first time. The smile on his face made it apparent he only came to cheer you up, and he was happy he could do it even for a moment. “No, he is pretty great, even if I do hate him by times.”
“It’s a sibling thing, I think.” You said, looking back up at his face. “Love them, even when you hate them.”
“Exactly.” He nodded, agreeing with you. “He’s my best friend, but it doesn’t mean I don’t want to kill him sometimes. Has a great heart, but he can be a bit… annoying.”
“Josh? No.” You scoffed, playing into the bit as clear sarcasm dripped from your tone. At that, Jake let out a laugh of his own. You watched, in amazement at how beautiful such a simple sound could be. “Seriously though, I don’t know what I’d do without him.”
“Yeah, you guys have been friends for a long time, haven’t you?” He asked, leaning forward and into the conversation. It was your turn to nod, finding years of memories flash before your eyes when you thought of it for too long.
“Yeah, I met him as I was finishing up my graduate program in university. He’d just moved here, and I guess he was looking for some friends. Right place right time, I suppose.”
“Funny how things like that work out.” He said, listening intently to every word.
“For sure.” You hummed, pursing your lips slightly at the memory of how you met. “Ran into him at a bar, drunk off tequila and singing a terrible rendition of… oh, fuck, what was it?” You racked your brain, trying so hard to find the name of the song in the mess of your mind. “It was Neil Young, I remember that much.” You sighed, shaking your head at your spotty memory.
“Don’t Let It Bring You Down.” He finished for you, a sparkle shining in his eye as he saw your expression light up.
“Yes! How did you know?” You asked, shocked he knew before you did.
“I was there that night, and I definitely made fun of him just as much as you did.” He explained, chuckling at the thought.
“You were there?” You asked, even more surprised at that fact.
“Yeah, think I was playing pool with Sam. Josh sucks at pool, so he was trying to find a thrill elsewhere. He told us he met someone, he really liked their ‘energy’. Guess he was talking about you.” He continued, nodding at himself as he recollected the night from so long ago. “That, and he sings that damn song every time he drinks tequila.”
“Huh,” you huffed, wondering how you managed to miss him that night. “I guess I was out the door pretty fast. I don’t even think I talked to Josh for very long. Got his number and we were off to the next bar. We loved to party back then.”
“Shame, cause he’s been keeping you an awful secret for the last few years.” Jake let out a disapproving tsk at the end of his statement.
“No, it’s not him.” You promised, shutting down the notion. “Life’s crazy. I’m either always stuck at work, or at home—“ you cut yourself off, hearing the sound of the word fall from your lips. It was wrong, and so much so that it twisted your stomach with nausea. “Stuck at work.” You doubled back, feeling a frown start to form again. The word home felt like a sour taste in your mouth that you couldn’t swallow back.
Jake watched you for a moment, curious about your sudden change of heart, but understanding it might not be the best time to venture into it.
“Did you want a drink, sweetheart?” Jake asked, his eyes flickering to the fridge. “Maybe something to take your mind off it?” You debated, wondering if it would better or worsen your mental state. Before you could decline, he spoke again. “I was gonna have one anyway, so it’s no trouble at all. Be nice to have someone to drink with, anyway.”
“Fuck it, why not?” You breathed, watching as another breathtaking smile blossomed on his lips. “I’m sure it wouldn’t hurt.”
“Great.” He stood, taking two steps past you as he approached a cabinet by the refrigerator. “Want to come have a look?” He offered, looking back over his shoulder at you. You shrugged, nodding as you stood to join him. He opened the doors, revealing a plethora of bottles that all looked a little more expensive than you were used to. “Whatever you want.”
You noticed how close he was standing, how sweet his cologne smelled as it wafted in your direction. It was musky, ambery even, with sandalwood standing strong against the undertones. He had his finger resting against his chin as his eyes scanned the labels, clearly unsure of what he wanted, too. You couldn’t help but study the intricacies of his face, the bridge of his nose and how it casted a shadow over his soft cheeks, the unintentional pout of his bottom lip, and the enchanting colour of his irises. He was stunning, and it was hard not to notice it.
‘Stop it, Y/N. You’re in no position to think anyone is attractive, let alone your best friends brother.’ Your thoughts were right, full of warnings you knew you should listen to, yet there was something so enchanting about Jake that made it difficult to listen. ‘Thinking he’s attractive is only bad if I plan to act on it, which I’m definitely not. It’s okay to admire him, as long as that’s all it is.’ You felt the devil weigh in on the matter, and for some reason, that train of thought was much easier to go along with.
So you did. Simple as that, you decided to allow yourself the pleasure. It was almost as simple as acknowledging how beautiful Jake was.
“Anything catching your eye?” He asked, looking over at you. You knew he was aware of your staring, and when your eyes caught his, your cheeks tinged red. He gave you a smile, silently telling you all was well.
“There’s so much to choose from.” You said, forcing yourself to look back at the liquor cabinet.
“Do you like it straight, or do you prefer something sweet?” He asked, raising an eyebrow at you once again. Although the question was innocent and clearly pertaining to the topic at hand, you couldn’t help but feel your heart speed. Your body was encased in goosebumps at the simple thought of him meaning it in any other way.
“Usually sweet, but I think today I could handle it straight.” You replied, having to tear your eyes away from him again. Had you looked for a moment longer, you might have noticed the ghost of a smirk on his face.
“This is my favourite.” He said, reaching out and grabbing an expensive looking bottle. He brought it down to your level, leaning into you slightly as he let you read the label for yourself. As his arm brushed against yours, you felt the same pull of your heart as you did when he first sat across from you.
“I’ll try it out.” You mumbled, a little breathless as he looked over your face.
“Good taste,” he hummed. “You’ll like it, I promise.” He assured you, his tongue darting out over his bottom lip ever so slightly.
“I trust you.” You said, feeling like you were coercing your tongue to speak the words.
“You should.” He responded, waiting for you to step away first. It felt like an eternity before you stepped backwards towards the table, but when you did, you missed the closeness of him almost immediately. The warmth of his body against yours was memorable, and definitely something you wanted to feel again.
You returned to your seat at the table, followed closely behind by Jake. Before he sat, he grabbed two glasses and the ice tray from the freezer. Carefully, he poured yours first before adding a few ice cubes to the cup. Then, he nudged it in your direction before fixing his own drink.
“What’s on your mind, beautiful?” He asked, swirling his ice around his cup before bringing it to his lips. As he sipped at the amber liquid, his eyes never left your face.
“Oh, nothing important.” You shook your head, averting your gaze to the glass in your hand. You did the same, raising the crystal to your lips and drinking down the alcohol like it was water.
“You’re drinking that awfully fast for someone who’s got ‘nothing important’ going on.” He noted, cocking his head to the side for a moment, as if he was trying to figure you out. “I’ve got an ear to lend, if you want to talk.” He offered, but opted not to press any further. He didn’t want to force you if you weren’t willing, but he did want you to know that the floor was yours if you needed.
“I wouldn’t want to bore you.” You chuckled, watching the condensation of the glass drip onto your fingers. The chill of the liquid distracted you from the severity of the topic. “You’ve been kind enough already, Jake. Seriously, I can’t thank you enough for inviting me.”
“No thanks needed, y/n. Seriously, Josh talks about you enough that I feel like I already know you, and trust me when I say, I like you just as much as he does.” He promised, taking another small sip of his drink. “And I offered, sweetheart. I want to listen, even if you don’t think I do.”
“What is with you two?” You chuckled, shaking your head at his staggering kindness. “Too nice for your own good, both of you.”
“And that’s a bad thing?” He grinned, finding your exasperation amusing.
“No, it’s not.” You shook your head, feeling your heart warm with gratitude for the two brothers. You barely knew Jake, but you agreed with what he said. Josh spoke about him enough that you felt like you were friends already, and by all of the nice things Josh had to say, you definitely liked him. Since stepping foot into the kitchen, you had come to greatly appreciate him for other reasons, too.
“That’s the heartbreak chair.” He explained, running a hand through his hair as he pushed it away from his face. “Something about it draws people in.” Your eyes flickered up to his face, shocked that he made such an assumption, and even more surprised that it was right. He barely knew you, but he could tell without you having to say a word.
“It’s that obvious?” You asked. He shook his head, rubbing his chin in his hand for a moment before he spoke again.
“No,” he cleared his throat, taking in a long breath before he continued. “Like I said, there’s something about that fuckin’ chair.”
“How so?”
“Two years ago, Sam sat there when his girlfriend broke up with him. Must’ve spent the whole night sitting there, drinking away the pain.” He said, thinking back on the event. “And Daniel, a few months back when him and his girlfriend went separate ways. Even Josh, a long time ago when we first moved here.” He explained. “Whatever it is, when people get their heart broken, they sit there. I usually sit here, but it’s not always me they’re talking to. Sometimes it’s Josh, or another friend, or anyone really.” You thought about his words, carefully considering your next question before asking it.
“Have you sat here?” Your eyes were showing the sadness you tried so hard to hide. You didn’t know why, but you were comfortable with Jake. You wanted to talk, to tell him all about the sadness plaguing you. Something about him made you believe that your sorrows were safe with him, and that he was the key to feeling better.
It was an invasive question, something personal and maybe too complicated for him to answer. You regretted asking, but hearing about his brother's sorrows didn’t sit right with you. If you were giving him a piece of you, you wanted a piece of him. He swallowed hard, his eyes flickering between your face and the whiskey in his cup. Eventually, he gave a slow nod.
“More than anyone else, I think.” His honesty was sobering, and it was admirable. Because of his willingness to share his sadness with you, you felt even better about opening up to him. “I’ve never been lucky in love. Always a bridesmaid, never a bride.” He shrugged, the joke rolling off his tongue effortlessly despite the hidden pain in his eyes. “About six months ago, I was doing the same as you. Came home, she was gone without a trace. I stayed a few nights at Josh’s house, just ‘till I was strong enough to come back here, and I drank it all away. I’ve sat in that chair, sweetheart. You’re not the only broken heart this house has seen. Trust me.”
“It’s hard to open up to Josh about it.” You said, forcing your hand to hold the glass to the table. The burn of the alcohol in your chest was much preferred to the ache in your heart, but you persevered. “‘Specially when I watch how happy and in love he is. He’s got everything, you know? Nice house, kind heart, beautiful face, and a wonderful boyfriend. It’s intimidating talking about my mess of a life to someone who always seems to have their shit together.”
“I can see what you mean.” He nodded along, agreeing to an extent. “You know, he’d never think differently of you. He loves you a whole hell of a lot.”
“I know that, but I think when you’re this miserable, it’s hard to believe anyone cares that much.”
“For sure.” He said, swallowing down another mouthful of whiskey.
Just as he placed his cup down on the table, the distant chatter in the living room began to move closer. Both of you turned to the entryway to the kitchen, wondering what the disturbance was. Soon enough, the crowd filled the doorway, but only Sam and Josh were visible.
“Think we’re gonna head to the bar, you two in?” Sam asked, oblivious to the situation in front of him.
“I’m good.” Jake said, his tone firm and certain of his answer. Josh looked at you, curiosity in his eyes as he waited for a response.
“Y/N?” Josh asked, wondering if you were joining them. You looked between the twins, your eyes lingering a bit too long over Jake. When you looked back at Josh, you shook your head slightly.
“Think I might hang out here a bit longer, if that’s okay?”
“F’course it is.” Jake chimed in. “You go, I’ll get her back to your place safe and sound.” Josh looked to you once more, making sure you were alright. You gave him a smile, nodding your head in agreement with Jake.
“Okay, I’ll see you later. Love you, mama.”
“Love you too, Josh.” You smiled again, wider and with more warmth than ever.
With that, the group moved towards the door, and they were out in the yard within seconds. The silence hung heavy between you and Jake, but it wasn’t uncomfortable. So far, despite you being a stranger, your talk with Jake had been nothing but comfortable.
“So, does that mean you don’t think I have my life together?” Jake continued where you left off, clearly teasing. The smile on his face gave him away as he pulled his chair a little closer to you.
“‘Spose I don’t know you well enough to know, yet. From what I see, looks like you do, if that counts?” He let out a laugh, finding your humor despite the pain beautiful.
“You hungry?” He asked, raising an eyebrow. “Noticed you didn’t eat earlier.”
“Think I missed the draw on that one.” You said, looking at the empty dish on the stove. He stood, wordless as he walked to the refrigerator. He searched for a few seconds before pulling out a plate, flashing it in your direction.
“Put some away for you, just in case. I knew they would eat it all, so I just wanted to make sure there was some left.” He explained. The sound of his words made your heart ache, but it wasn’t in a bad way; the simple action, especially coming from someone who barely knew you, made the whole world seem a little bit brighter. You understood Josh’s constant talk of how big of a heart Jake had now that you had the chance to see it for yourself.
“Thank you, Jake.” You mustered the strength to speak, in awe of his attention to detail. He stuck it in the microwave, waiting for it to beep before placing it in front of you with a fork. Without mentioning it again, he sat back in the same spot, as if the last few minutes had never happened at all.
“What happened, sweetheart?” He asked again, more direct this time now that he felt he had some kind of leverage. Clearly he made a good enough impression on you, considering you hadn’t run out the door when the opportunity arose. Before responding, you took a few bites of the meal he’d made in preparation for his company. Your eyes fluttered closed in bliss, the taste something you had never experienced before. You weren’t sure if it was just because he was a good cook, or if it was because it had been days since you had a proper meal. Maybe, it was a combination of both.
For such a simple looking pasta dish, it was beyond anything you had ever eaten before.
“This is so fucking good, Jake.” You commended him for his efforts. He let out another laugh, happy that you were enjoying it.
“Good to know,” he nodded. “I’ll have to make it for you again sometime.”
“You’ll never get rid of me.” You joked, placing the fork down for a moment, wanting to make the meal last.
“Not the worst idea in the world.” He shrugged. You felt your cheeks dust with redness, his words almost too sweet for you to handle. You washed down the pleasant feeling of his compliments with another sip of whiskey, settling back in your seat as you prepared to confess.
“I think I’ve always been too blind to see the bad side of people,” you started, simple and easy to kick off the topic. “I like to see the best in everyone, ‘till the very end.”
“Admirable.” He responded quickly, shocking you with his interest in your sorrows.
“I dated this guy for a while, a few years at least. Guess it wasn’t always sunshine and rainbows, but I loved him, or the idea of him, more so. He moved in with me not long after we met, and it was nice. Things seemed real good for a long time, but a couple months ago, he kinda pulled back a bit. I didn’t think much of it, ‘cause I was working all the time anyway, but I probably should have.” You sighed. “I started noticing he was gone when I came home at night, or when he went out, he stayed out far too late for a couple drinks with friends. Found some… suspicious things around the house, but chalked it up to a bad memory.” You laughed, shaking your head at your own stupidity. “I went home after work on Friday, and he was in bed with another girl. Mutual friend, real pretty, sweet on the surface… everything that I’m not.”
“That’s not true, sweetheart.” He shook his head, stopping that thought before it could go any further.
“Think we were long overdue for a breakup, but I thought it would be more decent than that.” You shuddered, recalling the moment that had been plaguing you for days. “I’m less heartbroken over him than I am for the whole thing. It’s just… dehumanizing, I guess. How many times did we… you know, after they started? And in my bed? Where I sleep at night?” You continued, watching the ice circle the bottom of your cup as the liquid neared the end. Jake reached out for the bottle, popping the cork and refilling your glass for you. You smiled, a silent thank you for everything he was doing.
“There wasn’t really a fight, or anything. I mean, I yelled for a little while, but it wasn’t worth my time. I told him to pack his shit and get out, and I assume he did. I haven’t been back, but I haven’t heard from him, either. Guess I just… don’t want to be in that place right now, alone, with that memory.”
“Don’t know the guy, but I can tell you he’s a fucking idiot.” He said, throwing back the last of his drink and refilling his own cup. “I don’t blame you for not wanting to be home. Like I said, I stayed at Josh’s for a while too. Sometimes it’s nice to get out of the place full of stuff that reminds you of them.”
“Yeah, exactly.” You gave a somber nod, blinking away tears threatening your eyes. “Think it always circles back to the same thing at the end of the day… hard not to think it’s me, that I wasn’t enough, or if I could have done more. That’s the hardest part of it, really. Not like he was the boyfriend of the year or anything, but I never would have done that to him.” You took another long swig of whiskey, feeling your head begin to swirl with intoxication.
“It’s not you, Y/N. You know better than that.” He said, furrowing his brow as he thought over your story. “So what is it? What do you need?”
“What?” You asked, unsure of what he meant.
“He got what he wanted, so what do you need, sweetheart? To scream? Cry? To get so drunk that you don’t know where you are?” He listed the offers, as if they were all completely reasonable and understandable. He didn’t want to speak empty words, or give you reassurances that would wash right off your shoulders once he was done speaking. He wanted to help you feel better, however he could. “We could even key his car, if you know where to find it.”
You let out a laugh, one that shook your shoulders and made your stomach ache. While you laughed, tears slipped on to your cheeks, but they did not phase you. Jake’s company was so fantastic that the hurt didn’t even seem to bother you anymore.
“You’re too beautiful to be crying over someone like that, sweetheart.” He leaned over, using his thumb to brush away the teardrops staining your cheeks. Once he finished, he cupped your cheek in his palm, ensuring you knew he was being truthful.
“No idea how you’ve never been the bride, Jacob.” You said, exhaling a long breath as you melted into his touch. It felt nice to be touched at all, and even better to be touched by someone who cared. It felt like it had been an eternity since you had experienced that in particular.
“My day will come, just like yours will.” He promised. “I know it hurts, but with time, you’ll thank him for it, because a girl like you shouldn’t end up with a guy like that.”
“Thank you, Jake.” You said, the utmost sincerity in your voice.
“Don’t mention it.” He brushed off the thanks, smiling over at you. “Now what is it? What will make you feel better, right now? ‘Cause I’ll be damned if I send you out the door before you feel better.”
“I just want to stop.” You sighed, rubbing your face in your hands. “I want to stop hurting, to stop thinking about him, to stop feeling like a different person. I want to feel like me. I want to feel good, instead of being miserable.” Jake leaned back in his chair, watching your face carefully as he thought about your request. You looked over at him, chuckling at yourself. “I know, steep request. Probably not much in the world we can do about that. Yet, anyway.”
“No, there is.” He cleared his throat, pursing his lips together slightly. You raised an eyebrow at him, intrigued by his response.
“Go on.” You urged him, curious about his idea.
“I don’t know if I can help you feel exactly like yourself again,” he started, looking up at the ceiling while he tried to word his response. “But I definitely have a quick solution for some of those problems.”
“Let’s hear it, then.” He smirked at your eagerness to feel better. Before he continued, he threw back the last of his drink for a second time. You could tell he was feeling it now, too. His cheeks were tinged pink and his eyes grew heavier the longer he sipped away.
“You’re open to any suggestions?”
“Well, most.” You huffed, almost annoyed by how long he was dragging this out. “Maybe not murder or armed robbery.” He laughed at your exuberance, shaking his head slightly.
“Well, sweetheart…” he sighed. “You want to stop thinking about him, and you want to feel good.” He listed, waiting to see if he was correct. You nodded in response, still not seeming to piece the two together. “If you’re open to trying it, I’m sure I could solve both of those problems at once.”
“Okay, Jake, this is not helping. Can you just—“ you cut yourself off, your eyes widening in shock as the puzzle finally clicked in place. You swallowed hard, your heart thumping wildly in your chest. As you looked at his expression, your cheeks burned red and your throat went dry. “Just to clarify, are you offering what I think you are?”
“Depends, beautiful.” He said, his tone soft and his eyes trained to your face. “What do you think I’m saying?”
“Are you offering to fuck me?” You wanted to be repulsed by the idea, but you were far from it. If anything, the feeling burning in the pit of your stomach told you the exact opposite, imploring you to fall into his arms and let him do as he pleased with you.
“Well, I’m pretty sure that would get your mind off him.” He argued his point, playful and calm so you knew rejection was more than allowed. “And if you’ll let me, I know I could help with that other part, too.” He let out a small huff of breath, as if he was excited just by the prospect of the opportunity.
“You offer that to every heartbroken girl who sits in this chair?” You asked, ensuring he knew you weren’t denying the offer.
“No,” he shook his head. “You’d be the first, and the only one, I think.”
“You think?” You raised an eyebrow.
“Never know what the future brings.” He shrugged, trying to keep his composure. As soon as he saw your bewildered face, he doubled over in laughter. It took him a few moments to regain his composure, but when he did, he did not seem to retract his statement. When he realized you took his words seriously, he stood from his chair, stepping towards you as he spoke.
“Yes, sweetheart. The only one. Is that what you wanted to hear?” He asked, tucking a lock of hair behind your ear.
“Yes, maybe? I don’t know.” You said, your eyes darting around the kitchen to avoid his heavy stare. “I don’t think I’ve ever been in this situation, so I’m not sure how to react.”
“Only if you want to, of course, but the offer is on the table.” He said, retracting his hand so as not to pressure you into it. You took a drink from your cup, finding your chest burning as you did so. Difference was, you knew it was not because of the liquor. As you sat the cup back on the table, you looked up at him, inspecting him closely.
He was attractive, and that was undeniable. You had been thinking about it since the minute you saw him, and you couldn’t seem to get the thought out of your head. Just half an hour ago, you were shivering from the closeness of his body when you were standing by the liquor cabinet, and now you were quivering just from the thought of his hands on your body. Maybe it wasn’t the best idea, but in the moment, what he was saying made sense to you.
He was hot, you were desperate to forget, and he was offering a quick solution.
“Okay.” You nodded. “Why not?” He watched you for another moment, standing still while you decided for certain that’s what you wanted to do. “Uhm, we won’t tell Josh about this, right?” You asked, a sudden wave of nervousness washing over you.
“Definitely not.” He laughed.
“And it’s just that? Just sex?”
“Just sex, just tonight, if that’s what you want.” He assured you.
“Okay.” You nodded again, more confident this time around. “Just sex, just tonight, with a guy I just met, who happens to be my best friend's twin brother?”
“It sounds better my way.” He said, taking a step towards you.
“Oh yeah? And what’s that?”
“Sex with someone who is happy to make you feel better.” He spoke quietly, kneeling down so he was eye level with you. His face was closer than it had been all night, and if it were even possible, he was even more stunning up close.
“Yeah, that does sound better.” You agreed, smiling slightly as you tried to keep your breathing steady. Jake seemed to prompt more of a physical reaction in you just by looking at you than your ex did in the entire time you’d been with him.
You weren’t sure if it was the whiskey combining with the heartbreak forcing you to make a deadly decision, or if it was just the fact you were attracted to him. Either way, you knew you couldn’t leave his house without a taste of what he was offering, because he had excited you just by mentioning it. You felt like leaving him without knowing what he could do for you would cause more grief than your breakup had in the last few days.
“So what do you say, sweetheart?” He asked, reaching forward and brushing his knuckle over your burning cheek. Your eyes fluttered closed at the touch, but you tried not to let it phase you too much. “You want me to help you forget about him?”
“Think you already have.” You mustered the strength to speak, but not the strength to look him in the eyes. You were sure if you did, you would turn to putty in his hands.
“So you’re saying you don’t need anything else?” He pried, finding the teasing amusing now that he knew you were okay with his actions.
“No, I definitely do.” You corrected him, finally opening your eyes to look over his face. “I really do.”
“Tell me what you need, angel.” He said, flattening his palm against your cheek again. His fingers were tangled in the loose strands of hair hanging over your neck, the action more telling than the last time he touched you. It was firm, more reassuring, and meant to solidify his feelings about the situation.
“You,” you bit the inside of your lip, almost embarrassed about your need for him.
“Don’t be shy, beautiful. Think we’re long past that.” He said, his eyes flickering down to your lips. Although he had full intent to follow through with his earlier promise, he wanted you to be in charge of the matter.
“Kiss me, please.” With that, he leaned forward, pressing his lips to yours as he held your face in his hand.
His lips still tasted like the alcohol he was sipping on, and his skin was still cold from the ice in his cup. Even so, the chill of his skin was quickly offset by the warmth of his tongue as it glided past your lips. The feeling was addicting, much more intense than you thought it might be. Your hands reached out for him, desperate for more. His fingers seemed to be burning into your skin, the touch electric and the sensation ten times more powerful than anything you had ever felt before. The emotion flowing through you from such a simple action was immeasurable, and you already needed more.
“Like that, sweetheart?” He asked, his lips still ghosting over yours as he presented the question. You were breathless, your head spinning and your mind completely free of the painful thoughts that previously seemed permanently attached to you.
“Don’t stop,” you pleaded, your voice quiet. You could feel him smiling, cocky enough to know his plan was already working. “Please, don’t stop.”
“Come with me.” He said, moving away from you and rising back to his feet. Although you were sad he pulled away at all, you knew it was for a better reason. He grabbed the bottle of whiskey and his own cup, waiting for you as you tried to bring yourself back to earth. You took your own from the table, waiting for him to make the next move.
He outstretched his arm, still holding the bottle tightly in his hand as he loosely wrapped the appendage around you. Carefully, he guided you to the hallway. Without any further words shared, he led the way to his bedroom with intent to finish what he started. As soon as you stepped inside, you were surrounded by him. His cologne lingered in the air, and his clothes littered the floor. His bed was messy, but in the most inviting way possible. Patch cords and guitar picks littered the surface of his dresser, and an acoustic guitar took post in the corner of the room.
Although the stipulations of your entanglement did not extend beyond a single night, curiousity got the best of you. With your heart singing a song curated specifically for him, it was hard not to want to know more about him. Seeing his life so intimately made you crave more substance from him, even if it was ridiculous for you to think.
“What’s on your mind now?” He asked, placing the liquor down on his bedside table.
“Nothing bad,” you assured him, still trying to soak in all the room had to offer. “Guess I’m just curious about you now, is all.”
“All you have to do is ask.” He said, taking a few steps towards you. “Later, though, because talking isn’t my top priority right now.” You watched him as he closed in on you, your stomach twisting with excitement at his words. Before he could place his lips on yours again, you swallowed back the last of your drink and placed the empty cup on the top of his dresser, freeing your hands so you only had to focus on him.
You stepped forward, closing the distance between you as your hand landed on his bicep. Now, with the opportune position, he had the luxury to touch you as he pleased with nothing standing in his way. One of his hands fell to your hip, his grip firm as he pulled your body into his own. He leaned down, placing his other hand on the back of your neck as he guided your head towards his. He started slow, fearful he might have come on too strong, but you weren’t willing to take your time with him.
It had been a long time since you had been excited by the prospect of sex, and despite knowing you should not be feeling such a way about anyone, let alone Jake in particular, he had elicited that response from you easier than anyone who came before. Even though his kindness was the most abundant of all his traits, you caught a few glimpses of what lie beneath, and if you were being completely honest, that was what held your attention.
The way his arm felt resting against yours at the liquor cabinet, the sly smile after his ambiguous questions, his heavy stare when he thought you weren’t looking, and the sparkle in his eye when you laughed. That was what drew you in, and everything else was just a cherry on top.
When you first sat with Jake, you almost felt guilty that you were so willing to tell him about your troubles, especially after shutting Josh out. Now, with his lips on yours and his hands exploring your body, it made sense that you felt such a way. Jake was offering much more than Josh could, and he could help in ways that Josh could not begin to imagine. He gave you an easy pass to forgetting, a quick solution to feeling good, and a simple way to move on, even if it were only for a short time. Jake was the perfect fit for what you needed, and you were happy that he was so eager to help.
Time was the only true healer, but Jake was a catalyst to speed the process up, and a very pleasurable one at that.
As the kiss continued, the two of you grew much more comfortable with each other. Your body had relaxed and your hands were more courageous as they travelled over the parts of him you were desperate to know. Your entire body was ablaze with excitement, and your mind was completely free of all the previous fears and feelings you were plagued with. His hand on your hip had drifted to your ass, pulling your hips forward into his as he became familiar with the taste of you on his lips.
If you had any fear about his willingness to sleep with you, it was destroyed within seconds of stepping into his bedroom. You could feel his own excitement, through his actions and other, more obvious signs. As he continued to kiss you, you could feel his erection against your leg, straining against the zipper of his jeans. As much as he wanted to take your mind off of things, you were just as happy to relieve him of the problem you had so easily caused.
When he parted from the kiss, his lips were pink and swollen, glistening with spit under the low light flowing in through his window. His hair was messy from your fingers running through it, and his eyes were darker than they were in the kitchen.
If you thought he was beautiful before, it had nothing on how he looked now.
His hands drifted under the hem of your shirt as he looked over your face, ensuring you were comfortable with continuing. When he was met with pleading eyes and a hopeful expression, his lips quirked up into a smile as he lifted your shirt over your head. As he tossed it to the floor, his gaze traveled downward, allowing himself to admire the parts of you that were usually kept hidden. He sucked in a sharp breath, as if the sight knocked the air from him completely and he was trying to recover from the shock.
“So fucking beautiful, angel.” He hummed, his hands finding you again as he spoke. The feeling of his calloused fingertips against the smooth skin was exhilarating, and even more enticing than anything he’d done before. He dropped his head to the crook of your neck, bringing his lips back to your skin as if he was already missing the feeling of kissing you.
He focused on your neck for a moment, curiously exploring as he tried to find the sweet spots. When his tongue settled below your ear, a whine fell from your lips, so quiet he nearly missed it. The sound reached his ears, sending his skin tingling as it wrapped around his spine and made home there. He kept his attention in the same spot, desperate to hear more. Your hand raised to his arm, holding yourself steady as your stomach swirled with emotion. His mouth continued lower, and courage flooded him as his hands continued to familiarize themselves with you.
He unhooked your bra, brushing the straps from your shoulders as his mouth landed on your collarbone. You felt his teeth graze the skin, the action gentle but purposeful as your bra fell to the ground with your shirt. Now, without anything standing between the two of you, his hand landed on your breast. His thumb drifted over your nipple, moving in a slow circular motion as he felt it harden under his touch. The small sensation only furthered the ache between your legs, and you could feel the wetness begin to soak through the fabric of your underwear.
As he continued his work, you felt your thighs squeeze together in a shameless attempt to ease the discomfort. You didn’t want to rush him, because everything he was doing was phenomenal, but it was growing increasingly difficult to bite your tongue when you so badly needed more from him.
Eventually, his head dropped low enough for his tongue to graze your already sensitive nipple. The warmth of his mouth paired with the precision of his tongue was deadly. You felt a shaky breath rattle your chest as you tried to keep yourself calm, but it was growing increasingly difficult to do so. You needed him more than you needed anything in your entire life; your body craved him in a way you never knew to be possible, and he had promoted more pleasures than anyone before without even needing to take all of your clothes off.
Something about Jake was otherworldly, and his promises to help you forget were not empty. He was doing exactly as he intended, better than you ever thought he could.
He seemed to be enjoying the moment just as much as you were, completely content with pleasing you and never worrying about his own needs. You had never, in your entire life, met someone who was concerned with your needs first.
He pulled his mouth away from you, his eyes fluttering up to your face as he took a few seconds to sort out his thoughts. His eyes were blackened, his pupils completely consuming his irises as he thought about all of the possibilities the night could have.
“Let’s get you out of these,” he muttered, hooking his fingers through the back belt loop on your jeans.
He pulled the fabric away from your skin, letting it snap back to form as he pulled his hand away. The thud of the material against your skin sent another rush of arousal through you, and you found yourself complying to the request without a second thought. He brought one hand to the button, undoing it with ease as he dropped to his knees once again. He pulled down the zipper, tugging on the fabric so they fell down past your hips. As soon as the denim was out of his way, he brought his lips to your stomach, focusing his attention there for a moment before going any further.
You were aching for relief as his tongue drifted over the exposed skin, and you were nearly brought to your knees as he took the time to leave a trail of pink marks where his lips landed. It would be a reminder of the night for days to come, darkening further with time, and you were thrilled at the idea of having a physical memory of his touch when not in his company. He pulled your jeans further down your legs, his lips now ghosting over your hips as he tapped your leg. You lifted one foot from the ground, allowing him to free you from the jeans entirely. You repeated the process with the other leg, and eventually, the jeans were strewn across the floor and gone from your memory completely.
“Jake, I need you.” You huffed, looking down at him, watching carefully where his lips met your skin. He did not respond right away, seemingly wanting to finish what he started before moving on to something new.
Then, his lips pulled away from you, but did not stray too far from their original position. You watched the muscles in his jaw tense as he comprehended the raw emotion behind your words.
“You need me?” He repeated, his voice husky and his eyes heavy as he bargained with the fact.
“Please,” you whispered, breathless as you tried to recover from the constant stimulation he was providing. “So bad, baby.” He drew in a long breath, his eyes fluttering closed as he heard the pet name fall from your lips.
“How could I say no to you when you sound so pretty?” He asked, the question without need of an answer. With that, he used his arm to push you towards the foot of the bed, only stopping when the backs of your knees collided with the mattress.
Then, he rose to his feet, finding himself at eye level with you once again. “What do you want me to do, angel?”
“Anything; just touch me, please.” Your voice was weak, his effect still strong over you even though he wasn’t touching you.
“Anything I want?” He asked, stepping closer and bringing his hand to your side again. He let his fingers trail down until they met the hug of the elastic band of your underwear on your hip. “Are you sure about that?”
“Positive.” You gave a single nod, showcasing your certainty on the matter. He chuckled at your eager nature, looking you over once while he thought of what to do next.
“Lay down for me, sweetheart.” He said, nodding his head towards the bed behind you. “Don’t be shy, get comfortable.” He continued, watching as you turned towards the mattress, unsure if it was possible to climb in and be uncomfortable. The blankets looked soft, and warm, even if they were strewn messily across the surface. The pillows looked like clouds, and there definitely wasn’t a lack of them. More than that, it smelled like him, even from afar. Although you’d only known him for a short time, it had already become a comforting scent for you.
You did as he asked, climbing into the bed and rearranging a few of the pillows. Once you were satisfied, you laid on your back, looking up for him as you awaited further instructions. He gave you a small smile, unable to refute how much he liked the sight of you in his bed, even if it was under strange circumstances.
It was never like Jake to dislike the sight of any girl in his bed, but you seemed to tug on his heart just a little more than others that came before.
“This is a sight I could get used to.” He hummed, adjusting himself in his jeans as he let his eyes trail every bit of exposed skin you had to offer.
“Thought this was a one time thing, Jacob?” He chuckled at your question, unbuttoning the few buttons holding his shirt together. As he slid the fabric from his shoulders, he responded to your inquiries.
“I said if that’s what you want,” he reminded you, dropping the shirt to the floor. Your eyes drifted to his body, drinking in every inch of him. The way the columns of his neck blended perfectly into his collarbones. You studied the structure of his shoulders, focusing intently on his biceps as your eyes trailed down his arms. Then, your gaze moved to his chest, the tan skin decorated with necklaces hanging from his neck. Your admiration ended when your eyes met the buckle of his belt, and you realized he was watching you watch him. “For some reason, I don’t think you’ll be able to stay away.” He sent a wink in your direction to follow his words.
His ego was taking up every spare inch of space in the room, and he was completely different than he was when you were sitting with him in the kitchen. The sweetness still lingered underneath the surface, but his desire had turned him wicked and he was doing everything he could to keep you on his hook. You couldn’t find a single complaint about it, because you loved this version of him even more than the kind hearted man who opened his home and his liquor cabinet to you.
“I think I want another drink,” he started, looking at the bottle decorating his nightstand. His gaze flickered back to you, wanting to ensure you were still watching him. “How about you?” You couldn’t help the sinking feeling in your stomach, wishing that he would just go back to touching you. The banter was fun, and you loved talking to him, but you had needs far more pressing than conversing with him. “Don’t look so disappointed, Angel.” He hummed, grabbing the bottle of whiskey. “I promised to make you feel good, and I’m going to…” he trailed off, popping the cork from the bottle as he kneeled on the bed beside you. “But I have to have my fun, too.”
With that, he brought the spout of the bottle to your navel, carefully letting the trickle of cool liquid fall to your skin. A few droplets trickled down the side of you, landing on the mattress below, but he didn’t care. With great gentleness, he reached out and placed the bottle back on the stand. Without breaking your stare, he settled himself between your legs, his head hovering over your belly as he leaned down a little closer.
With his eyes still settled on your face, he let his tongue glide over your stomach just above your panty line. The skin was already dampened from the spill of liquid from the bottle, cold from the air hitting the wet surface. His tongue warmed the skin, but did much more than just that. The gentleness of his touch cause a plethora of emotions to course through you all at once, and you couldn’t seem to keep your mind straight. The disarray only seemed to worsen as he trailed upwards, drinking up the whiskey like he was a professional on the matter.
When the alcohol was consumed, he did not stop his tyrant. Instead, he continued all the way up until his tongue met your breast once again, circling around your nipple before suctioning his lips to you completely. The warmth and wetness of his mouth was otherworldly, and the new position allowed for his hips to meet yours while he continued teasing you. You shifted down on the mattress, not enough to break his focus, but just enough for your aching core to meet with his cock, strained against his jeans. The contact was minuscule, but enough to elicit a sharp intake of breath from him.
He used his free hand to hold your hips in place, grinding himself down on you ever so slight to give you a bit of relief. The friction was good, even if it wasn’t enough. Paired with the feeling of his tongue on your sensitive nipple, it was enough to pry a moan from your lips.
“Jake, please touch me. Need it so bad.” You whined, feeling your hips raise from the mattress despite his hand holding you down. He pulled his mouth away from you, a small popping sound ringing through the air as he lost the suction of his cheeks.
“You want me to touch you, beautiful?” He asked, shimmying to the side so he could do as you asked. He brought one hand between your legs, resting beside you on his knees as he held himself up with his other arm. His fingers ghosted over the thin fabric covering your aching core, noticing the wetness before he even pushed the fabric to the side. “Fuck,” he hissed, looking down at his hand. “All of this for me, angel?”
“Just for you, baby.” You whimpered, feeling his finger drift over your covered clit. Although you wished that the barrier did not exist, you would settle for what you could get.
“And what’s got you so worked up? It can’t be me, I’m just getting started.” He teased, pushing the fabric to the side. Before he continued, he waited for you to respond.
“It’s you, Jake.” You assured him, almost sheepish of the fact. He was right, he was just getting started, and you were far too worked up for just a few minutes of foreplay. You couldn’t help it, though; between his sinful touches and your own lack of sexual pleasure over the previous few years, you were ready to come undone before he even touched you.
“Don’t tell me he was that bad of a guy.” Jake let out a murmur of discontent at the thought. “Couldn’t think about anything other than himself, even with a girl as pretty as you in his bed?” Your cheeks burned red at his words, embarrassed at the thought of him being correct. “You know I won’t do that to you, angel.” He promised, finally letting his fingers get a feel for the wetness pooling between your legs. “From here on out, it’s all about you. I’ll take care of you, sweetheart. Does that sound good to you?”
“Yeah,” you breathed, nodding in agreement with his idea. To you, it sounded more than good. It sounded fantastic.
With that, he gathered your arousal on his fingers, slowly trailing it up to your clit. He traced slow circles into the already sensitive bundle of nerves, watching your face so he did not miss a single second of your reaction. Your gaze flickered to his face, taking in all of the details while he did the same for you. His brow was furrowed with concentration, and his lips were still slightly swollen from earlier. The muscles in his jaw were tense, and his eyes told you just how happy he was to be pleasing you.
“You know, I was hoping to get you in my bed, even before you sat in that chair.” He confessed, his voice quiet as a sheepish smile crossed his face.
“Y-yeah?” You asked, the word breathy as you felt the pull of pleasure begin to build in the pit of your stomach. You were intrigued by his statement, so much so that it took your mind away from the burning desire for a moment.
“Yeah,” he affirmed, smirking at your obvious curiosity. “Been thinking about it since the first time I saw you at Josh’s house.” He continued, carefully letting himself move closer. He propped himself up on his forearm, moving his body down towards yours. “You walked out, all dolled up in a pretty little dress. Blue, if I remember right. I wasn’t really looking at the dress.”
He was right, and you could remember the scene just as well as him. It was the only blue dress you owned, and you were on your way to lunch with a potential client, which was why you were so eager to get out the door. He was carrying his guitar, in a cutoff t-shirt and jeans that hugged his legs just right. You were both younger, a little more naive and much more childish. You could remember being stunned by his long brown hair, tousled by the wind, and the sunglasses that sat low on the bridge of his nose. He was beautiful then, just the same as he was now, but you were too afraid to introduce yourself. You managed a small greeting as you passed by him, and spent the whole drive to the restaurant with the picture of him stuck in your head.
“Been waiting that long, Jacob?” You asked, finding a bit of strength to tease him back.
“I wouldn’t say waiting,” he chuckled. “But definitely thinking about it. Prettiest girl to ever walk out of his house, and the prettiest girl to ever step foot in mine.” He continued with the flattery, sliding his middle and index finger to your entrance. Before he continued, he slipped his fingers inside of you. As he began to pump his fingers, he let his thumb drift over your clit. The combination of the two sensations was overwhelming in the best possible way. “If I had it my way, I would have fucked you right there on his porch.” The vulgarity of his words may have been off putting in any other context, but as he said it, your walls fluttered around his fingers and another intense wave of arousal washed over you. “And you would have let me, wouldn’t you?”
You were nearly delirious from the pleasure steadily growing in the pit of your stomach. Your skin was ablaze, the sensation growing stronger with every word he spoke and every touch he gave you. You were willing to tell him anything and everything he wanted to hear as long as it meant he wouldn’t stop.
“God, yes. I would have.” You whined, moving your hips down on his hand as his fingers curled upwards, hitting the sweet spot inside of you.
You weren’t lying, either; had you known at that time he could make you feel so good, you would have let him do whatever he wanted to you. At the sound of your tone filled with need for him, he made it a point to curl his fingers upwards again as he pumped them into you. As his fingertips brushed over the sensitive spot he’d found with ease, a moan filled the air, loud and desperate for him to keep going. “Oh, fuck me.” You groaned, gripping at the sheets below you.
“I intend to, sweetheart.” He replied. Although he knew you did not direct the message to him, he felt the need to interject his own thoughts anyway. As the words left his mouth, he leaned down, pressing his lips to yours. He couldn’t help himself; he was compelled to kiss you, feeling that he might not be able to survive without the taste of you on his tongue.
His fingers continued to move with intent, eager to pry an orgasm from you. The knot in your belly was tightening further by the second, your skin tingling with pleasure as another moan tore through your chest. He drank in the sound like a man dying of thirst, feeling lucky to be the one experiencing such intimacy with you, even if it was under strange circumstances.
He broke from the kiss as he felt your walls clench around him again, knowing that you were closer to a climax than you would ever admit. He increased the pressure of his thumb, watching you carefully so he did not miss the moment he’d been patiently waiting for.
“That’s it, gorgeous.” He crooned, drunk of the pleasure twisted amongst your features. The praise washed over you like summer rain, settling deep in your stomach and furthering the intensity of the feeling. Your brow was furrowed, your eyes squeezed shut and your lips parted ever so slightly, allowing the most beautiful sounds to cross them. “You’re so fucking hot.” He muttered, propping himself up a bit further for a better view. As much as he wanted to focus on your face, he felt his eyes trail down to his hand, unable to resist the only other sight that could compare to your pretty face.
He sucked his bottom teeth between his lips, biting down on it as he watched his fingers disappear into your cunt.
Your eyes cracked open, desperate to catch a glimpse of him before you descended into the organ that was quickly approaching. When you caught sight of his face, you noticed his eyes were not looking at you like they had been moments before. When you followed his gaze, seeing what he was so fixated on, you felt a whole different type of emotion wash over you. He did not notice your stare, too caught up in the sight to even care about anything else. You were enthralled in him, watching him admire you like you were the most precious thing he’d ever seen.
You bit down on your lip, feeling the warmth in your stomach begin to spread to the rest of your body. You were so close, so ready to give in to the temptation of the feeling, but you weren’t ready for the moment to come to an end.
Within a second, that train of thought was completely disregarded, unimportant and needless.
A low groan, resembling more like a growl sounded through the room, coming from deep in his chest. His eyes turned dark, almost animalistic as he was taken by his desire for you. It was a simple thing, so unimportant in comparison to everything else he was doing to you, but it was everything to you. To know you could drive such a beautiful man to such desperate feelings made you weak, and knowing he was just as taken by you as you were with him sent you over the edge.
The orgasm that took hold was stronger than any you had ever had before. Your entire body was immersed in euphoria, from the very tips of your toes to the muscles in your face. Not one part of you was spared from his wicked power, and as your legs trembled, you came to terms with the fact he was right; heartbroken or not, you were hooked on him. Walking away would be ridiculous, and coming back for more was a given. You could not comprehend the idea of never feeling such a way again, and that made it all the harder to equate your solution for heartbreak to a single night.
“That’s it, angel. Doing so good for me.” His words seemed far away, but the sentiment behind them stuck with you indefinitely. He continued pumping his fingers into you, coaxing you through the climax with his hand and his words. You had never felt more important, more cared about than you did with him, like your enjoyment was the only thing in the world that mattered.
He pulled his fingers out of you, his gaze flickering to your face as he raised his hand to his mouth. You watched as he slipped his middle finger past his lips, glistening with your release as it landed on his tongue and his mouth closed around it. As the taste filled his senses, his eyes fluttered closed and a low groan rattled his chest. Your face flushed, your stomach pulling with another bout of pleasure as you watched the scene unfold in front of you. He pulled his finger from his mouth, a slight popping sound filling your ears as the digit slid off his lips. Your eyes squeezed shut, the sight nearly pornographic, and hotter than anything you had ever witnessed before.
“Taste so fucking sweet, baby. Just like I thought you would.” His words were soft, gentle as they filled the air around you. You couldn’t look at him, fearful that if you caught his eye, you would descend into another orgasm without him even touching you at all.
Your knuckles ached as you released your iron grip on the sheets, your body relaxing against the mattress as you came down from the high. Your lungs ached for a full breath of air, and your skin was still tingling with the ghost of pleasure. You looked down at Jake, expecting him to be watching you, waiting for your next move, but he was doing none of those things. He was tossing his belt to the floor, sliding out of his jeans and boxers at once and tossing them in the growing pile of clothes on the floor. You noticed his frantic nature, taking a second to discard your underwear and toss them to the floor as well. He didn’t say a word, making a move to shift downwards on the mattress. He settled between your legs, his hands on your hips as he pulled you down towards his face.
He guided your legs over his shoulders, settling his palms on the tops of your thighs as his lips dusted light kisses over the inside of them. As you both grew more comfortable with the new position, you felt his confidence grow, too. His teeth grazed over the sensitive skin, his tongue following the path to sooth any irritation that might occur. Goosebumps littered your entire body, and every nerve was aflame with desire for the boy who made home between your legs. You watched him, a wondrous sparkle in your eye as you inspected his every move.
Was it normal for someone to be this attentive, to be so concerned with making you feel good? Had you been missing out on such a fantastic experience, wasting your time with someone who was only concerned with himself? Or was Jake just so phenomenal that he made everything a million times more fun?
You did not know, and you did not care; the only important thing to you was him, and he was doing well in making you forget about all of your other worldly troubles. The only thoughts in your mind were pertaining to him and his ability to please you. He was like poison, infiltrating every thought and every emotion, completely taking over without you even thinking twice about it.
His eyes flickered upwards, meeting yours in a silent inquiry. The trail of love bites on your thigh was darkening by the second, and his gaze was burning into you.
“Talk to me, sweetheart.” He ordered, but it was hard to comply to his wishes when it felt like his fingers were searing into your skin.
“I-I just… sex has never been like this before.” You breathed, wondering how he knew something was wrong despite you not saying a word. He was effortlessly in tune with you, feeling every emotion coursing through you as if it were his own. “It’s never been so good, and I’ve never been so… taken care of.” You squeaked out the last few words, embarrassed to admit it to him.
“Oh, don’t tell me that, angel.” He muttered, almost pained at the thought. “If I had known he wasn’t taking care of you, I would have done it myself, a long time ago.” The sincerity in his tone made your head spin, and you were almost regretful that you had been so caught up on a man who wasn’t worth your time, when you could have been spending your time indulging in someone like Jake. “You mean to tell me he wasn’t doing this?” He asked, obviously referring to the act he was about to commit. Your cheeks burned red as you shook your head, silently answering him. “What a fucking idiot.” He muttered, clearly to himself.
Instead of continuing the conversation, he pulled your hips down a little further, letting his actions speak louder than his words. He lowered his head, and you held your breath as his mouth connected with your core. His tongue slowly ran through your folds, starting at your entrance and ending at your clit. He let his focus remain there for a moment, circling around the sensitive bundle of nerves as your hands snaked down your body, tangling themselves in the long locks of his hair. Your felt his tongue dip down to your entrance again, flattening against you as he repeated the same process from earlier, savouring every drop of arousal you had to offer him.
As his tongue reached your clit again, he let out a long hum of satisfaction, like the moment had curbed every craving he had for you in an instant. He pulled away from you for a moment, looking up as he listened closely to your shallow breathing. “I could stay between your legs for the rest of my life, and I’d be fucking happy to do it.” He said, his tone gruff as some residual anger remained in his mind. “Now that I’ve had a taste, I don’t think you’ll be able to get rid of me.”
A whimper fell from your lips, completely uncontrollable as you tried to sear the memory of him between your legs into your brain for eternity. He returned his mouth to you, using the sound as encouragement while he continued on with his work.
Jake was a force you were not familiar with, yet you feared you may never fully grasp his power. You met him at the perfect time, and he offered his services when you needed them most. It was supposed to be a quick fix, a simple solution to stop the pain from tearing you in two, but it quickly grew into something much more than that. Now that you had a chance to experience pleasure at his hands, you weren’t ready to give it up.
Calling Jake a rebound would be ridiculous, because he was the furthest thing from it; in just an hour, he gave more to you than your ex did in years.
Like you said earlier, you were mourning the situation more than you were mourning the person or the relationship itself. The picture of betrayal had been seared in your mind, the self-doubt and self-hatred was abundant, and maybe there was a hint of sadness over the loss of routine, but most of your ailments were not caused by the man himself. With Jake’s help, that became incredibly apparent, and the rest of the sadness and anger seemed to fade away the longer his hands were on you.
“A-ah, fuck.” You hissed, your fingers tightening in his hair as an intense wave of pleasure took hold. “Feels so good, Jake.” Instead of pulling away to respond, he hummed against you, the vibration of the sound furthering the sensation he was already giving you. He wanted to hear how good you were feeling, how good he was making you feel. His ego hadn’t gone away, and your compliments only fed it further. You would be uncomfortable with his cockiness if it were not warranted, but from everything he’d done so far, you understood that he was the only man you had been with who had a right to be so self-assured.
His hands inched up your legs, his grip loosening as he moved his fingers. The light tickle sent a shiver down your spine, and your head was spinning as his grasp slowly settled on your hips. His tongue continued to circle around your clit as he pulled you a little further down on his face. A moan filled the air, much more desperate than the last and the vulgarity immediately categorizing it as pornography. You weren’t sure if such a sound ever left your lips before, but you did not have time to focus on the fact before another one followed up the last.
Your cheeks were burning to the touch, your skin blotchy with redness and glistening with sweat. Your hands were anchored in the roots of his hair, and his tongue was driving you so crazy that you couldn’t help the automatic roll of your hips against his tongue. You were bordering the edge once again, and he seemed to have no intent to slow. One of his hands remained on your hip as the other began to explore, dusting over your stomach with great gentleness. It was a staggering difference between the hand on your hip, which was holding you tightly, as if he was scared he would lose you if he let go.
You were lost in the movements of his tongue, no other thoughts existing within your mind as he continued with his precise actions. The warmth of his mouth was heavenly, the wetness of his tongue making every move all the more remarkable. His hand raised to your chest, finally finding what he had been blindly searching for as his palm cupped your breast. You squeezed your eyes shut, letting your head fall back onto the pillow as you tried to keep your breathing steady. Then, his fingers found your nipple, brushing over it and sending jolts of pleasure through you. The sensation combined with the feeling of his tongue was indescribable, addicting, and intoxicating. You felt drunk off of him alone, and you never wanted to sober up.
Just when you thought you were accustom to the multiple sensations all at once, he moved his hand, taking your nipple between his thumb and his forefinger and giving one hard pinch. You let out a gasp, your hips bucking forward into his mouth even further. You could see the shake of his shoulders, showcasing his silent laughter at your reaction.
Even if you wanted to be upset at him, you had no idea how to be. Being angry with Jake seemed like an oxymoron, two things that could not coexist together. If anything, all you wanted to do was praise him for all he had done to help you.
He retracted his hand from your chest, snaking it back down your body. He brought it underneath your leg, bringing his middle and ring finger to your entrance. He pushed them inside of you, with the same curl to his fingers as earlier. The added stimulation was heavenly, and a sure apology for his earlier action. He barely had to pump his fingers at all before your back was arching off the mattress, desperate and shameless for more.
“Jake, baby.” You warned, the words coming out hastily and jumbled together. “M’gonna cum.” You forced the rest of the sentence out, the fire in your belly blazing and threatening to take hold.
He hummed against you again, encouraging you to give in and let go. With one last curl of his fingers paired with the flick of his tongue, your second orgasm took over. Your legs trembled with the intensity of the feeling, your hands holding his hair as if you were afraid of floating away if you let go. The air was filled with obscenities, curses and praise for his work as you descended into the pleasure. If his mouth wasn’t occupied, you knew the praises and encouragement would be the most beautiful thing you had ever heard. He coaxed you through the moment, and your heart rate began to slow and your muscles started to relax from the tension.
Difference was, this time he didn’t slow.
His tongue continued to trace your clit with more intent than before, as if he wanted to see how far he could take it before you gave in. At first, the feeling was uncomfortable, but the idea of stopping was more troublesome than the sting of overstimulation. Instinctively, your body tried to pull away from him, but he used his hand on your hip to hold you in place. Your hands remained in his hair, but did not try and pull his head away from you. You wanted him, and the orgasm he had just given you was inexplicably addictive. You wanted to feel that way again so bad that you could spare the few moments of discomfort in exchange for something so fantastic.
The noises falling from your lips had upped in intensity, and definitely felt more dramatic. You were loud enough that you feared the neighbours might hear you had they stepped outside. He was living in the moment, driven near insane from the desperation in your voice. You looked down, and despite your blurred vision, did the best you could to admire him while you had him like such. His hair was a mess, still knotted around your fingers. The muscles in his back were tight, flexing with every move of his arms. His knuckles were locked in place around your hip, decorating it so nicely that you dreaded the moment he had to let go.
Although beautiful, those were not the things that held your attention. Instead, you were drawn in by the sight of his hips grinding into the mattress below. Pleasing you had worked him up so badly that he himself was aching for relief, unable to control how badly he needed to be touched. The thought was maddening, and the sight drove you over the edge.
Before the overstimulation even began to wear off, your body was forced into another climax that put the previous ones to shame. Your throat was raw from crying his name, your entire body aching from the violence of the feeling. For a moment, you thought you might die at the hands of his sin, but not even that thought could force you away from him. Your lungs burned and your head swam with thoughts of nothing and everything, all at once.
You had never felt such a way in your entire existence, and even when your body began to recover from the effects of his tongue, your mind had fallen far behind. You were barely holding on to reality as he finally withdrew his fingers from you, and your head was completely elsewhere when his head moved away, too.
“Could listen to you scream my name like that every fucking night.” He growled, pressing his wet lips to your thighs so he did not have to give up contact with you entirely. “God you’re a fucking masterpiece. Can’t believe it took so long for me to have you like this.”
He didn’t give you a chance to respond, instead wiping away your release from his chin and moving upwards so he could kiss you. As his hips landed on yours, you felt his cock press against your soaking core, the warmth of bare skin against skin nearly driving you into another orgasm. You were floored at his ability to make you feel good, and amazed that nobody else could make you feel such things. As his tongue glided across yours, you could taste yourself on him, only making the moment even more remarkable. It made him even more addicting, and you were certain you could get used to having him in such a way.
“Just a second, sweetheart.” He slurred, drunk off of you. He pulled away from you, sliding out from between your legs and climbing out of bed. You watched him, breathless and stunned at the picture of him completely naked in front of you. It was the first moment thus far that you had the chance to admire him fully, and you never wanted to stop.
He was painfully hard, the tip of his dick red with irritation from the rough threads of the sheets and glistening with wetness from where he was resting against you. The sight sent you mad, your mouth watering and your need for him growing tenfold. He turned to his bedside table, rummaging around in the drawer in search of a condom. When his fingers landed on the box, stuffed way in the back and hidden under a pile of junk. He looked over at you, smiling shyly as he pulled one from the box.
“Don’t really need these all that often.” He chuckled, an inadvertent way of telling you he was being truthful when he said you were the only one he offered his services to.
“Wait,” you uttered, watching as he raised the package to his mouth to tear it with his teeth. He froze in place, worried that you might have changed your mind.
“What’s wrong, sweetheart?” He asked, ready to discard the foil square in his hand and dress himself if you were uncomfortable. “Do you want to stop, or slow down?”
“No!” You shook your head, feeling bad that the thought even crossed his mind. Instead of letting his anxiety get the best of him, you sat up from your laying position. Carefully, ensuring you had your balance, you shifted so you were resting on your knees, facing him. You looked up, giving a small smile as you beckoned him closer. His eyebrows knitted together in confusion, but he stepped towards you anyway.
Only when you reached out for him did he understand your intentions. He sucked in a sharp breath, watching as you grabbed his hand and guided him closer to the edge of the bed.
“Tonight is supposed to be about you, angel.” He muttered, a weak protest against your actions.
“I want to, Jake.” You assured him, unable to refute your desire to please him, too. “Please?” You looked up at him, doe-eyed with faux innocence written over your features.
“Fuck,” he muttered under his breath, unable to resist the temptation. “I had no idea you were such a whore.” Even if his words were venomous, his tone did not match. He had such a way with words that even his insults sounded like praise. “Go ahead then, if you want it so fuckin’ bad.”
You debated thanking him for his kindness, but you opted to do it with your actions, instead. You leaned toward, bringing your mouth to him. You parted your lips slightly, letting your tongue glide over the head of his cock. The saltiness of the pre-cum staining his skin lingered on your lips as you took him in your mouth. You bobbed your head down slowly, allowing spit to accumulate on your tongue as you let it glide over the underside of his cock.
As you moved your head down on him, your eyes fluttered closed in concentration. His size was something you weren’t used to, but you had enough confidence to follow through with your efforts. When you felt his tip hit the back of your throat, your eyes watered as you fought back a gag. Desperate to impress, you relaxed your throat as you took him all the way. You felt him twitch in your mouth, letting you know that he was enjoying the moment just as much as you hoped. A string of curses fell from his lips, followed by a long groan. The sound only worsened the persistent ache between your legs, but you carried on, knowing that he would take care of that once you took care of him.
He raised his hand to your hair, gathering it in his hand and holding it away from your face. His eyes were permanently fixated on you, terrified of missing even a second of the view in front of him. You sat there for a moment, allowing yourself to grow comfortable with the feeling before forcing yourself to swallow, despite the momentary discomfort. As your throat constricted around him, he took in a sharp breath, overwhelmed by the sensation. Another groan tried to force it’s way from his chest, but he tried to hold it back, resulting in the sound coming out more similar to a whine.
Even if it was unintentional, it drove you fucking crazy.
You pulled back in one swift motion, inhaling a breath of air as his cock fell from your lips. Trails of spit covered your chin, but it did not phase you. Before he could recover from the loss, your mouth was on him again.
“Ah, fuck, sweetheart.” He growled, his grip in your hair tightening. “Full of fucking surprises tonight.” Your eyes flickered upwards, catching his stare as you bobbed your head down on him. You longed to sear the picture in your mind forever. His hair was disheveled, his jaw-hard set and his eyes crazed as he studied your every move. He was the most beautiful thing you had ever seen, and you were certain of that. You felt lucky to be able to please him in any way, and grateful to have caught his eye all those years ago.
As you drew your head upward, you let his cock leave your mouth completely, deciding to give him a show. You circled your tongue around his tip, pursing your lips as you placed them on the side of his dick. You pushed your tongue flat against him, suctioning your cheeks just a bit to add some pressure. As you moved your mouth down his cock, you made sure to keep eye contact with him the whole time. When you reached the base, you slowly ran your tongue over him as you brought your head back to the tip. Without breaking the momentum, you took him back in your mouth and bobbed your head back down until his tip hit the back of your throat again.
You started a steady pace, listening intently to every sound that passed his lips. It wear encouraging, and it was hot. If you had to say, it was the most attractive thing you had ever heard. As you felt him slide down your throat again, you let out a moan. The vibration amplified the already intense feeling, causing his head to fall back on his shoulders as he hissed out a long string of curses. You could feel him throbbing in your mouth, desperate for a release but unwilling to give in to it just yet.
In truth, you would not have minded. He had been beyond generous already, and to do him a kindness was the only way you thought fitting to repay him. Even if you would miss out on fucking him, you were happy to be used by him in any way.
As you continued at the same pace, you could feel him begin to lose himself to the pleasure. As your head came down on him, his hips involuntarily moved too meet with you. The constant pressure in the back of your throat was making it difficult to keep calm, but you persevered until he pulled away first. A particularly sharp thrust of his hips sent you over the edge, and the gag you tried so hard to stop finally forced its way out. Your throat constricted around him again and your eyes welled with tears. Hastily, he pulled away from you, his chest heaving as his concerned eyes looked over your face.
“M’sorry, angel. You okay?” He asked, crouching down so he was eye level with you.
“Yeah, I’m good, it’s okay.” You promised, nodding you head. He raised his hand to your cheek, swiping away tears that had fallen from your eyes.
“We can take a break if you need it,” he assured you, holding your gaze. “Don’t be afraid to tell me if I’m going too fast or if it’s too much.”
“I’m okay, I promise.” You gave him a soft smile, well recovered from the moment of slight tension. He watched you for a moment longer, wanting to be certain. When he realized you weren’t going to change your mind, he leaned forward and pulled you into a kiss. The softness of the action was all you needed to feel better again. “Can you fuck me? Please?” You muttered the words against his lips, unable to wait until he was finished to ask the question.
“You want me to fuck you, sweetheart?” He asked, intrigued by your excitement.
“Yes, please.” You breathed, needing it like you needed air. The desire you had for him was nearly debilitating, and since he’d stopped touching you, there was no relief for the grating need.
“Turn around for me, Angel.” He said, rising to his feet. He was in no position to deny you anything, because he wanted it just as bad.
You did as he asked, noticing he was reaching for the foil wrapper on the nightstand again. You couldn’t comprehend the grief that washed over you as you saw it, and the words rushed out faster than you could stop them.
“I’m on the pill,” you said, hearing him freeze in place. “I’m clean, too.” You were telling the truth, because before him, unprotected sex wasn’t even a thought in your mind. Whatever he had done to you that night seemed to permanently alter your mind, and the simple thought of not having him completely was sickening.
“Me too.” He hummed, almost relieved that you told him. He tossed the condom back on the table, the dull clatter of the impact prompted a smile on your face.
You backed up closer to him, your knees resting near the edge of the mattress and your feet dangling off the edge. He stepped towards you, his hands reaching for your hips as he positioned himself between your legs. His touch drifted over your ass, appreciating you while he had you in such a way.
“You have no fucking idea how good you look like this.” He praised your beauty, his voice deep and laced with desire. One of his hand fell from your hip, and seconds later, you felt his cock rest against your cunt. Slowly, he ran the tip through the wetness that was worsening by the second. “You want it, sweetheart?” The husky tone settled deep in your bones as you dropped to your forearms, bringing your top half lower to the mattress. You pushed your hips back towards him, adding a little more pressure to your clit, which he was resting against.
“So bad, Jake.” You pleaded, looking back over your shoulder at him.
“What was that, Angel?” He asked, sliding himself back down to your entrance. “Couldn’t quite hear you.” There was a smirk on his lips, cute enough to help him get away with the teasing, but irritating enough to bother you.
“Please, baby.” You whined, trying again.
“Please what?” He pressed further, pushing his hips forward ever so slightly. The miniscule change was agonizing, but it still made your head spin. “I want to hear how bad you want me, beautiful.”
“Please fuck me, Jake.” You finished your broken sentence, your tone stronger than it had been all night. “I need to feel you, please.” With that, you pushed your hips back again, testing your limits.
Unlucky for you, at the same time, he thrusted forward with force, causing the impact to be so much more intense.
“A-ah, fuck!” You yelped, the size of him something brand new to you. The way he filled you was enough to bring you to your knees, but the painful sensation of his cock hitting your cervix amplified the pleasure even further.
“There you go, baby.” He crooned, completely disregarding your response as he drew his hips back and slammed back into you with the same energy. “How does that feel?” The slight sneer in his tone was aggravating, but you had to admit that it looked really good on him. The sudden change in attitude made you realize that what had come before that moment was not typical for Jake. He was snarky, arrogant, and he liked to be in charge. You could tell by his fingers bruising your hips and his tone talking down to you.
Although you thoroughly enjoyed the time you already spent with Jake, it almost made you sad when you realized what exactly you missed out on.
As you were stuck on the thought, you felt a sharp sting across your ass. The sensation on your skin combined with the pleasure of him inside of you, making you quiver under the touch. “Answer me when I fucking speak.” He barked, letting his fingers gently caressed the reddening skin where his hand made contact. You weren’t sure if it was purposeful or absentminded, but the sweet touch after the harsh words felt good, reassuring that he was only putting on an act.
Then, you decided if he wanted to push you, you could do the same to him. The worst that could happen was a punishment, and the idea of punishment at Jake’s hands was nothing but thrilling.
“Feels so good, sir.” You exaggerated your tone in hopes of getting under his skin, but the term of endearment seemed to short circuit his brain. His hips stuttered and his hands tightened their grip.
“Such a fucking whore,” he spat, his words quiet as he regained his composure. Even if his words were harsh, you could tell by his voice alone how much he enjoyed your attitude. “I love it.” He muttered the words to himself, but you heard it despite his efforts to keep it to himself. He felt your walls flutter around him, drawing him in further and deeper, encouraging his antics even further.
One of his hands raised to your hair, gathering it in his fist and knotting it around his hand. He tightened his hold, pulling your head back ever so slightly as his hips continued at the same, bruising pace. You arched your back even further, your chest nearly brushing against the mattress now as your ass raised to meet his hips.
“That’s my girl,” he hummed, holding your hips as he upped the strength in which he was thrusting into you. “Take it so fucking good.”
The knot in your belly was tightening further by the second, threatening to snap with every move. You were crying his name, praising him for his hard work as he pushed you closer to a climax. You were sure his bedroom would never recover from the pornographic display the two of you found yourselves in, and the thought served as a comfort. You wanted him to think about you every time his bedroom door closed, remembering how you looked in his bed as he fucked you from behind. You wanted him to picture the way your ass met his hips every time he closed his eyes, and you never wanted him to forget the feeling of you wrapped around him.
Although he intended to solve your problems, you wanted to create a new, constant one for him; one that plagued him every night and haunting him during the day. You wanted Jake to succumb to the need of you, and you wanted your number to be a constant call in his phone, begging you to come over so he could curb the urge for a little while. You wanted to infiltrate every thought that crossed his mind, because you could not stand the idea of him giving this to anyone else.
“You want to cum already?” He asked, recognizing the tremble of your legs and the desperation of your high-pitched moans. “So fucking needy you can’t even enjoy it for a while?” He chastised you, but both of you knew there was zero malice behind his behavior. He was living for the way you moved against him, surviving off the sound of your pleasure. He was thrilled to drive you to such a state so easily, and he would give you whatever you wanted, so long as you asked nicely.
“Please, sir. I want it so bad. I need it.” You stressed the importance of the topic, feeling the burn begin to overtake your entire body. The urge was impossible to stave off, and you knew there was no use in trying. After all he’d done to you so far, you were long past self-control.
“Fine, but you better not hold back. I want to hear every one of those filthy fucking noises.” He growled, pulling your head back with a little bit of force. “Put on a good show, sweetheart, or I might not be so nice next time.” He warned, holding your head in place with one hand and your hip with his other. He pulled you back on him, making the impact even more powerful. The painful pleasure pulsed through your entire body, so intense that you could feel it behind your eyes. With every thrust of his hips, you grew closer to the release you so desperately needed.
In exchange for him giving you what you needed, you gave him exactly what he asked for.
“Oh, god, Jake.” You whined, upping the dramatics for the sake of his request. “You feel so good, baby. Please don’t stop.” You pleaded, feeling your head spin with the threat of your climax. You could hear his shaky breaths, the sound of your words hitting him harder than he anticipated. His hips remained steady, though, never faltering as he continued on exactly as you asked him to.
“Come on, angel.” He huffed, looking down at the curve of your ass, watching himself as he fucked into you. The permissive statement sent you spiralling, pushing you over the edge with little thought.
“Fuck, Jake.” You groaned, feeling your stomach burn with pleasure. Your hands were balled into fists, knuckles white as you gripped the sheets. Your arms and legs felt like they would give out from under you as they trembled. Jake seemed to notice the same thing, and the hand holding your hip slipped under you, holding you up so you did not have to worry about anything other than feeling good.
“That’s it, baby. That’s my girl.” He crooned, never letting up on his pace as he continued to fuck you through the climax. Even as you came down, your body did not relax. Your skin was ablaze and your forehead was glistening with sweat. You were tired, and the feeling of him inside of you became less pleasant and more intense as he continued to thrust into you. Your noises became less angelic and more desperate, as if they served as a warning for him to slow down. Overstimulation was threatening your exhausted mind, driving you closer to insanity by the second as the burn of irritation began to spread.
“Jake,” You wheezed his name out, trying to bargain with him as he increased the speed of his hips. “Jake, please.” You pleaded, now for an entirely different reason.
“What, you wanted it so bad and now you can’t take it?” He growled, his hips still moving at a relentless pace. “You can take it sweetheart, I know you can. Be good for me, baby. Just a little longer.”
“I don’t know if I can.” You cried, your throat raw from the desperation of your moans. Both of you knew he would stop if you really needed it, but he would be damned if he gave up before you truly needed him to.
“You can, beautiful. Being so good for me.” He rushed out, clearly growing close to his own climax. “Don’t you love being a good girl for me?” He asked, easing up on you ever so slightly.
“I do,” you whimpered, feeling his hand in your hair push your head towards the mattress. The strength of his thrusts had lessened, and the overwhelming sensation started to become pleasurable again. “I love it.”
“I know you do, sweetheart.” He whispered, desperation beginning to set in for him, too. He loosened his hold around your hips, knowing you were much steadier, now. He moved his hand between your legs, his middle finger finding your clit with ease. “Just a little while longer, baby. I’m not done with you yet.”
“Oh, fuck.” You groaned, his words giving you the strength to keep going. You clenched around him, amplifying the sensation for both of you as his finger continued to trace around your clit.
“So fucking tight.” He praised, saying it mostly to himself. “Give me one more angel. I know you have it in you.” He was right, the orgasm was already building at a rapid pace. You could feel the tingle of euphoria in the tips of your fingers and toes. You were too strung out on him to answer, but he knew that you would give him what he wanted.
Nobody in their right mind would ever deny Jake anything he asked for, anyway.
“Jake, fuck, m’gonna cum.” You rushed out, the urgency something you had never experienced before in your life. He let out a low chuckle at your state despite feeling the same desperation.
“That’s my girl.” He said again, the statement still hitting as hard as it did the first time he said it. With one last thrust of his hips, you came undone, all of the pleasure from the night coming to one final climax.
Your mind was blank, no thoughts or worries left to bother you. You wanted to scream his name, but nothing was coming out. Your chest ached and your lungs were in dire need of air, but you could not even seem to do something as simple as breathing. Jakes hand pushed your head further into the mattress, your cheek pressed against the soft fabric of the sheets as he started to lose his composure, too. His movements were sloppy, his hips stuttering every time he fucked into you. The finger that was once tracing perfect circles on your clit seemed to forget how to do so, and he had his turn to utter profanities that only solidified the moment in your minds forever.
His grip on your hair loosened as he reached his peak, spilling his release inside you as his hips began to slow. He used his arm to pull you back on him one last time, holding you there while he recovered from the intensity of the moment. He let out a long breath, looking down once more where his hips rested against yours. He drew back, slowly thrusting forward a few more times as he fucked his release back into you. A low growl sounded from his chest, the sight alone nearly working him up all over again.
“You okay, sweetheart?” He asked, his loving and catering tone returning as he withdrew from you completely.
“Yeah, m’okay.” You nodded, feeling the pressure in your skull lessen as he loosened his hold on your hair. “Fantastic, actually.”
“Yeah?” He grinned, excited at the idea. “You feel better?”
“Jake, you have no idea.” You breathed, slowly moving from your position. You were sore, tired, but you felt better than you ever had. “I don’t think I’ve ever… no, I’ve never had sex like that.” You confessed, rolling on to your back to let your body rest for a moment.
“I’m glad I could help, beautiful.” He said, laying down beside you. “Don’t worry about the mess, I’ll clean it up later.” He said, pulling you into his arms. You rested your head on his chest, his skin warm and soothing as the sound of his heartbeat thudded in your ears.
“I should probably call a cab, get back to Josh’s place before the bar rush starts.” You sighed, saddened by the thought alone. You wished to stay wrapped up in Jake’s arms for the rest of the night, even if you knew you shouldn’t. You were going through a breakup, and dating was not on the table (or shouldn’t be, at least), but there was something special about Jake, something so different that it made it impossible to want to walk away from him.
“Are you crazy?” He scoffed, his tone light as he looked down at you.
“What?” You raised an eyebrow, tilting your head up as you awaited an answer.
“Like I’d ever make you take a cab.” He rolled his eyes. “But, you’re not going back to Josh’s place, sweetheart.”
“What if I want to?” You shot back.
“Do you?” He asked, seemingly staring into your soul. You bit the inside of your lip, fighting back a smile as you gave a small shake of your head. “Didn’t think so. I’ll just tell him we drank a little too much and you crashed in the spare room.” Your stomach sank at the thought of a spare room, but he could see it in your eyes before you had the chance to address it. “You’re not actually staying in the spare room, gorgeous.”
“Okay, good.” You breathed, chuckling at your own stupidity. “‘Cause I’d much rather stay here, with you.”
“That was never even a question.” He assured you, letting his fingers gently trail over your back. The light tickle was addicting, comforting and soft. It was exactly what you needed after such a high energy evening. “I’m not even close to being done with you yet.” He said the second part, quieter this time, but you could still sense the truth behind his words.
“No?” You giggled, smiling up at his pretty face.
“Mmm,” he hummed to himself, the sound vibrating his chest. He seemed like he was thinking about all of the possibilities the night held, everything he could do with you (or to you, for that matter), and more importantly, what positions he could put you in. “No, definitely not.”
“I wouldn’t be opposed to that.” You let out a sigh of content, already dreaming of the same things. A silence fell between you for a moment, but it wasn’t uncomfortable. With Jake, it never was. After a while, you felt the urge to speak again, to show your gratitude for his kindness. “Thank you, Jake. For everything.” You whispered. “It really helped.” His lips quirked into a smile as he pulled you closer to him. He leaned down, placing a soft kiss on the top of your head.
“I’m glad I could help, sweetheart.” He muttered, his lips still pressed against your hair. “And please, if you ever need help forgetting about anything at all, just give me a call. I’d love to help you out.”
#gvf#jake kiszka#greta van fleet#sam kiszka#jake gvf#danny wagner#sam gvf#danny gvf#josh gvf#gvf fic#jake kiszka series#jake kiszka gvf#jake kiszka blurb#jake kiszka fluff#jake kiszka angst#jake kiszka fanfic#jake kiszka fic#jake kiszka x reader#jake kiszka smut#gvf smut#gvf fanfiction#gvf fluff#gvf angst#greta van fleet fluff#greta van fleet fic#greta van fleet smut#greta van fleet angst#greta van fleet fanfic#josh kiszka#builtbybrokenbells
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Closed Position: Week 3 (Cha Cha Part 2)
Closed Position Masterlist ||| Main Masterlist
Dieter Bravo x OFC (Katarina)
Series Summary: Dieter Bravo, now sober, was looking to change his bad boy image after hitting rock bottom. His team hoped that having him join the nationally televised family friendly dance competition, Dancing with the Stars, would be a good first step, if they can keep him out of trouble.
Katarina Stamos expected her last season as a professional dancer on the show to go the same as it had for the past thirteen seasons. That all changed when she was partnered with the infamous Dieter Bravo.
Dieter and Katarina are reluctantly thrown into their partnership and must learn to work together to succeed in the competition. In the process they form a deeper connection beyond the dance floor that neither anticipated.
Chapter Word Count: 17.6k
👉 Warnings: Themes dealing with intimate partner violence, past alcohol abuse, and past drug abuse. There will be fluff, tears, spicy language, and smut. This will be a slow burn. Read at your own risk. Dieter Bravo comes with his own warnings.
👉 Chapter Warnings: Dieter being Dieter. Gratuitous use of the "f" word and talk about Dieter’s member. Cat and Plant dad Dieter cuteness. Brief mentions of intimate partner violence (more protective Dieter).
Chapter Quote:
“I think I just became the bitch of a seven pound menace.”
Dieter’s POV
This week had been a fucking roller coaster. It started off with a bizarre production meeting with Stacia and Joe. I couldn’t believe they asked Kat and me to be flirty for the cameras, knowing she was engaged to someone else who is part of the cast. It was beyond inappropriate. Honestly, it pissed me off and I wasn’t OK with it. I didn’t like the position it would put her in.
They hadn’t been wrong about Kat standing out during the group performance. It was obvious to anyone who had eyes and I honestly felt proud of her. After the way Stacia had acted when I requested Kat as my partner, like she wasn’t that great of a dancer, it was almost like a big ‘fuck you’ to her. I loved every second of it and was feeling a little smug as they talked about putting Kat in the spotlight. It took everything in me not to rub it in.
The lunch with Kat that followed was an interesting experience. We really hadn’t got to spend a lot of time talking about things other than dancing up to this point. The lunch was a welcome break to have other conversations. I appreciated that she seemed interested in my hobbies. My plant hobby wasn’t something that I really got to discuss with people, so it was refreshing. I also got to learn about her plans for opening a dance studio after this season ends. I could tell she wasn’t looking forward to giving up competitions, but she seemed legitimately excited about her next steps. I was excited for her, and honestly, I couldn’t wait to see what she came up with. I knew whatever she did would be amazing.
During our first rehearsal for the Cha Cha, I found myself spiraling. Especially when we started putting the dance together. I knew the Latin dances had more of a flirty and sexual feel to them and I tried to mentally prepare myself for that ahead of time. However, I was not prepared for the way Kat was moving her hips, especially when she was doing it with her backside essentially rubbing up against my dick. When I told her I didn’t want to make an ass of myself, I was referring to the fact that it was taking everything in me to keep little bravo from standing at full attention and poking her from behind. I couldn’t focus and I couldn’t relax. It was literal torture. I was obviously going to have to figure out how to deal with that or we were going to have a problem going forward. I’m not even sure how I made it through rehearsals that day.
I was shocked when a text from Kat popped up on my phone later that evening. I was even more shocked when she said we were going to a Latin dance club. I tried to play it off with jokes, but internally I was falling apart. I spent the evening standing in my closet staring at my clothes. I had no fucking clue what to wear to a Latin dance club. I ended up texting my stylist around 10:30 PM, begging her to tell me what to wear. I was relieved when she said she would have a few things sent over the next day.
I had an appointment with my therapist very early the next morning. The first topic of the day was how things were going with Kat. I lied through my teeth, wanting to change the subject. I was not ready to unpack my feelings for Kat with Dr. Smith. Mostly because I was afraid of what she would have to say about it. I’m not sure Dr. Smith believed a word I said. She gave me a skeptical look when I changed the subject, but let me continue without coming back to that topic. I did notice her jotting down some notes though. I had a feeling it was going to come back to bite me later. I knew my feelings were wrong and that I shouldn’t be having them, but I couldn’t help it. I felt like it was out of my control at this point. I had tried so fucking hard to ignore it and I was still trying but failing. Some of it was physical, obviously, but the more time I spent with Kat the more I was drawn to her personality. I had never felt anything like this before and could not even begin to understand what it meant. I just wanted to pack it away and worry about it later.
I had a photo shoot with some fancy men’s fashion magazine after that. Honestly, I wasn’t even sure which one. It was the last thing I wanted to be doing, but I needed any job I could get. I still had to prove that I had my shit together and could show up and work without issue. It was also part of rehabilitating my image. The new and improved stylish Dieter Bravo. People in Hollywood talked, so it was important that I was present mentally and physically for this. I did my best to smile and be engaged with everyone, but it all felt forced. However, everyone seemed happy with the final product, so I took that as a win. At least it kept my mind distracted from what Kat and I were doing later.
When I got home, I found that my stylist had dropped off several items of clothing for our outing. I went with what looked the most comfortable. Luckily it was mostly light fabrics, so I wouldn’t burn up. I really only needed to change clothes since I had already showered, and my hair was styled from the shoot. That left me with an hour to do absolutely nothing except get myself worked up into a frenzy. The minutes were dragging on agonizingly slow, and my mind was already going to places that it shouldn’t be. I wondered what Kat would be wearing and if she was going to be moving the way she had been during rehearsals the day before. The thought of her rubbing up against me again was already making me hard.
I paced around my bedroom, begging my dick to calm the fuck down. Nothing was working. The only resolution I could come up with was to take care of it. I had been avoiding doing this because every time, my thoughts would wander to Kat. I didn’t want to think about her that way, worried that it would open up a door that I was frantically trying to hold closed.
I huffed out a quiet “fuck it” under my breath before quickly undressing and grabbing a t-shirt off the floor that I had slept in and crawled onto the bed. I found a bottle of lube in the nightstand drawer and went for it. I didn’t even try to keep the thoughts of Kat away this time - the way she would bite her lip and look at me through her lashes, the way it felt when she touched me while we were dancing, the way her hips moved. I imagined how she would look moving her hips like that on top of me and how fucking amazing she would feel wrapped around me. That was all it took to send me over the edge. I felt like a fucking teenager who was unable to control his load with how fast I came into my dirty t-shirt over the mental image of her writhing on top of me.
I laid there with my eyes closed for a few minutes, trying to come down from the high I was still riding, but the images and thoughts kept coming. I couldn’t stop them now. I wondered how she was when it came to sex. Would she prefer it to be slow and sensual or did she have a wild side? Something told me it was a little bit of both, and I was one hundred fucking percent on board with that. Within minutes, I was hard again. Jesus fucking Christ what is wrong with me? It had to be a new record because it never happened that quickly. Was it because I had been denying myself? Or was it because of Kat? Maybe both?
I looked at the clock, realizing I had to leave in 30 minutes. I sighed loudly, aware that this little problem wasn’t going away on its own. It was already almost painful. So, I went for round two and hoped that it got whatever the fuck this was out of my system.
Twenty minutes later I was a sweaty mess, standing in front of a fan trying to cool off after having one of the most intense orgasms I can recall having from masturbating. Then again, I had probably been too high in the past to remember the majority of them, so that didn’t say much. Once my heart rate calmed down, I moved to the bathroom and grabbed a towel to dry myself off some. I didn’t have time for a shower, so I threw on some more deodorant and cologne and hoped for the best. At least my hair still looked decent.
I somehow made it to the dance studio a few minutes early. I sat in the car waiting for Kat. I leaned my head back against the seat and closed my eyes, feeling strangely calm and focused. I hoped I could maintain this mood for the rest of the evening - the rest of the week even. I just needed time to desensitize myself to the intimacy and close proximity that we were being forced into this week. Once I did that, I would be able to handle anything. I had to.
I was startled from my thoughts by Kat opening the passenger side door. She laughed loudly over my reaction and it was the most beautiful sound. I could listen to her laugh all day. Then I took in what she was wearing, a simple knee length black dress that hugged her curves in all the right places. It was the sexiest thing I had ever seen, and she wasn’t even showing that much skin.
I appreciated that she thought to warn me about the bar during the drive to the club. Most people wouldn’t have considered that. I figured there would be alcohol and other substances floating around, but oddly enough, those things were not even on my radar. I wasn’t lying to her when I said it was a non-issue because I would be distracted. I just fibbed about what my distraction would be. My thoughts were only of her, and I knew they would be for the rest of the night.
The club was as expected, the same as any other. Kat wasted no time pulling me onto the dance floor. I was hesitant at first, worried about the possible involuntary reactions my dick might decide to have. Any hesitation I had dissipated when Kat grabbed my face and forced me to focus on her. There was something familiar about the way she was looking at me that I couldn’t place as she urged me to become one with her and the music - to relax and trust her. It drew me in, igniting that connection that we shared. The connection that I had been fighting so hard this week. After that, I was surprised to find that my worries ended up being a non-issue. I had to laugh to myself, realizing the only thing I had been needing to do was beat little Bravo into submission, for tonight at least.
The longer we danced, the more at ease I became. It felt like we were just two friends having a good time together. It seemed a little flirty, but that was the general atmosphere, and it came with this type of dancing. I knew that and tried not to dwell on it much. When Kat broke away and suggested a water break, I noticed she had an odd look on her face. I wanted to ask if something was wrong, but decided not to, figuring she was probably just tired. She had been going all day after all. She offered to go grab us some bottles of water. She didn’t have to say it, but I knew she was making an effort to keep me away from the bar, which I appreciated. The last thing I needed was to be photographed near one.
I was surprised when a few fans approached and asked for pictures while I waited for Kat to return. In the past, I had been kind of an asshole to fans, and I knew it. So, I tried to make it a good experience for them. They seemed just excited to see Kat when she joined us. They had actually been fun to talk to and it ended up being a humbling reminder that they were the reason I had the life that I did. It made me appreciate my choice to get sober even more.
Once Kat and I got back on the dance floor, I could feel something shifting between us. She had that familiar look on her face again and it was stirring something inside of me. After a few songs, it finally hit me. It was the same look she had in the video I had watched of her and Alec dancing. She never had it with any of her other partners from what I had seen.
This realization sent my mind spiraling. Now that I had picked up on it, I couldn’t stop looking at her eyes. There was fire blazing in them as she looked back at me, but there was something else there too. Conflict? Confusion? The intensity of it only seemed to increase the longer we went on. I could feel the air crackling between us so strongly that it was making me dizzy. I was almost afraid to think about it, but my gut told me that she was feeling something for me too.
When I playfully dipped her backward, I couldn’t help admiring her neck as her hair slid off it. For the first time, I dared to wonder what it would be like to kiss her there. As I pulled her upward, our eyes locked. I knew I should look away, but I couldn’t. She rested her forehead against mine as her hand gently caressed my cheek. I could feel her hot breath blowing over my lips as we lingered there. I really thought she was going to kiss me, until she suddenly turned to walk away. I didn’t want to let go, allowing my hands to trail down her body as she moved toward the edge of the dance floor. What the fuck just happened?
And just like that, the spell was broken. When she turned back toward me, she was smiling, but her eyes were guarded, and the fire was nearly extinguished. It wasn’t completely gone though, I could still see it simmering under whatever composure she thought she had gained. I gave her a big smile, relishing my new discovery.
I wasn’t surprised when she suggested we leave after that. The atmosphere of this place was chipping away at the thin wall that both of us had put up. If we stayed, that wall was going to crumble, fast.
I didn’t hesitate to take her hand as she led us out of the club. I was having sort of a “fuck it” moment and throwing caution to the wind when it came to touching her. I wasn’t even sure if I could stop myself at this point. We took a minute to take some selfies with fans on our way out. I kept at least one hand on her throughout that. The whole ride back to the studio I did manage to restrain myself since I had no reason to touch her while I was driving. I wanted more than anything to take her hand or rest mine on her thigh. I was dumbfounded by this sudden urge. It wasn’t one that I had before. I usually shied away from any type of physical touch unless I was having sex with someone. Even then, it wasn’t affectionate. It was for pleasure. Affection just wasn’t something I had had a lot of in my life and it wasn’t something I ever wanted. Until now.
When we got back to the studio and found Alec waiting outside, my stomach dropped. I had a really bad feeling about leaving Kat alone with him because he looked angry and a little inebriated. When she told me to go inside, I hesitated, but felt like I couldn’t just stand there. So, I went inside and got changed, realizing that I had left my sneakers in the car when I didn’t find them in my gym bag. At least I had a good excuse to go outside and make sure she was OK.
As I walked out the front entrance, my eyes immediately sought Kat out. My gaze found her just as Alec shoved her against the wall, causing her head to smack against the brick. I didn’t hesitate to go to her and shove him out of the way. I had never wanted to cause harm to someone so much in my life. It was taking everything in me not to crush his fucking face in with my bare hands, but Kat came first, and I needed to make sure she was unharmed. I’m sure my attentiveness to her only pissed Alec off further, but I didn’t care. I wasn’t going to bow down to his ego anymore.
I decided to try and diffuse the situation, for Kat’s sake, but that didn’t go as planned. I couldn’t say I was really surprised that Alec tried to hit me. I saw the look in his eyes and the way his hand balled up before he threw the punch. I was surprised by my reaction to it though. I’m pretty sure I closed my eyes as I flinched away from his fist, but somehow still managed to hit him pretty damn hard right in the nose. Hard enough that my hand was burning afterward. The satisfaction that I got from seeing his busted up face was well worth it.
When Alec called out for Kat to leave with him, I could feel every muscle in my body tense. There was no way I was letting her go. I couldn’t. I would hit him again before I let that happen. I was relieved when he didn’t try to fight it and left without further issue. As soon as he was safely out of our vicinity, I pulled Kat into a tight hug. I needed to check her over again - make sure she was really OK. Of course, she brushed away my concern in place of her own as she looked over my hand.
I realized she needed something else to focus on so that she didn’t fall apart. So, I let her take care of me. It didn’t stop me from looking her over again as she dug through the first aid kit. I could see her hands trembling as she rummaged around for supplies. Physically she seemed fine, but I knew her emotions were all over the place. I could tell she was in a fragile state, and it was breaking my heart. For the first time I noticed that this sweet and beautiful person was so fucking broken on the inside. She had done well to hide it, but the cracks were there, and I was finally seeing them. I wanted nothing more than to make her feel better and keep her safe. I wanted her to be mine and I wanted to take care of her the way she deserved.
I knew it was a bad idea to put my feelings out into the world right now, so I didn’t. I did, however, want her to know that I was here for her and that I was willing to help in any way she needed. It was all I could offer, but it seemed to be enough. For now. Even though I didn’t tell her how I felt about her, I did share what I thought about Alec. I could only hope she would consider my words and make the right choice for her own well being. I had already decided that I would be there for her through it, no matter what, I just hoped she would let me.
I spent all night tossing and turning, worried about whether Kat was safe. She had texted that she got home safely and was locked in, but that didn’t do anything to relieve my anxiety. I was up before my alarm went off the next morning, in a rush to get to the studio just so I could lay eyes on her. Then I realized me getting there sooner didn’t mean she would get there sooner. I grabbed my phone, found her name in my contacts, and typed out a quick text.
Me: Want me to pick you up some breakfast with your coffee? Muffin? Cheese Danish? Kit Kat? 😏 (smirk emoji).
It was my sneaky ass way of making sure she was OK without asking.
Kat: Again, I will never turn down food. Surprise me. No Kit Kats though. I’m banning them from the studio.
I chuckled. It seemed like she was back to her normal snarky self.
Me: ☹️☹️☹️ (three frowny face emojis)
Kat: OK. Fine. Just don’t let me SEE you eating them.
Kat: And Dieter…
Me: Yeah?
Kat: I’m OK. You could have just asked. Thank you though. 💜 (heart emoji)
Well, damn. She was onto me. Not that I minded. I kind of loved that she knew me well enough to know what I was up to.
Me: I didn’t want to be annoying about it. I’m happy you’re OK though. I was worried. Maybe I’ll actually get some sleep tonight…I’ll see you soon.
I hesitated before I hit send on that reply, but I wanted her to know how concerned I was and that I actually cared. At this point, I felt like I was mentally getting out a hammer and chisel, chipping away tiny pieces of wall between us. I wasn’t going to be able to keep all this in forever. Hell, before it’s over, I may end up busting through, Kool-Aid man style.
Once I gathered everything I needed for the day, I headed to the coffee shop, getting there in record time. I got Kat’s usual coffee order and added a blueberry scone. I was antsy, wanting to get the studio as soon as possible. I still needed to see her, to be sure. I knew the tightness in my chest wasn’t going to go away until I did.
I arrived at the studio twenty minutes early. I was surprised when I spotted Kat’s car in its usual spot. The space beside it was open, so I pulled in. Knowing it would be easier for me to keep an eye on things as we left later. My arms were full causing me to struggle to get inside the main entrance, but I managed without dropping anything. Kat laughed at my exasperated face once she noticed me trying to open the heavy studio doors. She ran over to help, giving me a warm smile as she took the drinks and food from my hands.
Kat sat everything down on a few chairs at the back of the room. I followed behind, eyeing her. I was relieved to see that she did seem to be OK, that was until she reached up to tie her hair back. After she finished, the wide neck of her top slid off of her shoulder, revealing bruises. I could feel my jaw tightening as I reached out to touch them.
Kat’s brow furrowed at my expression before looking down to where my fingertips softly grazed her discolored skin. She sighed, taking my hand in hers as she peered up at me, “I told you, I’m fine. I didn’t even notice it.”
I shook my head, feeling the rage simmering, then pulled her into a tight hug. “Please tell me you’re done with him,” I said into the top of her hair.
She hugged me around the waist, burying her face in my chest for a moment before she pulled back, inhaling a deep breath, “I had a ton of messages and missed calls from him when I got home last night. All full of apologies…he knows he fucked up.”
I tensed, not liking how this sounded.
“I texted him back…not ending things, but I did ask for space. I have a lot to think about and I can’t do that with him talking at me.”
I was hopeful that she would see what an asshole he was. She had to. She couldn’t continue like this.
“How are you feeling about things this morning?” I asked.
She gave me an apprehensive look.
“You know what, it’s not my business. I shouldn’t be asking.” I said before she could respond, suddenly feeling like I was prying. I didn’t want to do that. I moved to turn away from her, but then I felt her hand on my arm, “No, really…it’s OK. I don’t have anyone to talk to about it. Nobody knows about that side of him.”
She sighed, sat down, then ran her hands down her face. “Honestly, I’m just kind of numb. I really don’t feel anything. I should at least be angry, right? Is that bad?”
I sat down beside her. She reached for my injured hand and started rubbing her fingers over the knuckles with a lost look in her eyes. I watched her for a moment before I responded.
“Honestly, I think maybe you feel that way because you're avoiding dealing with it. Compartmentalizing it maybe? But I get the feeling it’s reaching a point where you can’t do that anymore.”
She pursed her lips and nodded. “I think maybe you might be right.”
Her eyes met mine with a sad smile on her lips, “The film crew will be here soon. I should try to cover this up. I don’t wanna give them gossip on a silver platter.”
She turned and reached for her gym bag, pulling out a smaller pouch full of makeup. I watched as she dabbed green, yellow, and purple color correctors on my knuckles then covered it with concealer, finishing with a setting spray. The discoloration and bruising were hardly noticeable now.
“Hopefully that will last long enough to get us through filming today. I’ll try to be careful and not rub it off while we’re dancing,” she said. Now turning her attention to the noticeable bruise on her shoulder. She started working to cover that as well, but struggled, not really able to see what she was doing. I reached out my hand, “Here, let me do that for you.” She sighed, but relented and handed me the color corrector palette she was holding.
I could feel her eyes on my face as I worked. My cheeks heated under her gaze as my heart pounded away in my chest. The static was crackling between us again, causing a few more chips to fall away from the wall between us. The moment felt incredibly intimate, and it only made me crave more. Once I was finished, she quietly thanked me and packed everything away out of sight.
We sat enjoying our coffee and breakfast as the camera crew started filing in with their equipment. A couple of the crew members got us mic'd up and started the interview right away while everything else was set up. Of course, they had questions about the sightings of us at the Latin club. I shouldn’t have been surprised, but I was. Luckily, Kat handled those questions perfectly. I know I would have stumbled my way through them in a way that probably would have raised some eyebrows.
Overall, we were more relaxed during filming this week - actually laughing and having fun as we rehearsed. We had a moment where Kat accidentally kicked me in the shin while transitioning to a lift. I turned on the dramatics for it, whining and rubbing at the spot as if it had hurt badly. It really hadn’t, but I did enjoy getting her worked up over it. Once she realized I was messing with her, she lightly smacked my shoulder and called me a jerk before breaking into laughter. The crew got a good chuckle out of it, quickly catching onto my antics before Kat did. We pretty much had the routine down by the end of the day, which put us a little ahead of schedule. That took a lot of stress off us for the week, which I think helped with the playfulness between us.
The day was over before we knew it. Kat seemed to be in better spirits as she got into her car, smiling at me over the roof of it as she waved. Once she was safely on her way, I pulled out of the parking lot to head to the pet store…again. I had gone through several different brands of cat food over the last week. The Little Dude wasn’t having any of it. He only wanted Tuna. I found myself in the cat food aisle, staring at a wall of packages. They all looked the same to me. I sighed, feeling overwhelmed by the options and not knowing anything about cats. I finally settled on some meaty looking wet food and hoped for the best.
As soon as I got home, I found Little Dude waiting outside the sliding glass door in the kitchen. He was on a schedule now and wasn’t going to let me forget about it. I opened the door, allowing him to come sashaying into the kitchen to sit next to the island. Waiting and watching as I scooped some of the new canned food out onto a plate and presented it to him. He stood and tentatively sniffed the chunks, then took a few nibbles but decided against it. He sat back down and looked up at me, whipping his tail around.
“Still a no, huh?” I said to him. He meowed loudly back at me. I sighed heavily, “You know, considering you were on the streets not long ago, you’ve gotten awfully picky. I feel taken advantage of here…”
He meowed again. I rolled my eyes as I moved toward the pantry for another pouch of tuna. I tried mixing some of the juice in with the food and gave it back to him. He still wouldn’t touch it. So, I added a few chunks of tuna as a topping. He ate the tuna and left the rest of it, before plopping himself down on his haunches and staring at me for more.
I chuckled to myself, “I think I just became the bitch of a seven pound menace. Fine, Dude. You win. Here’s your damn tuna. We need to get this figured out though. I’m sure you're not getting all your nutrients from that.”
He meowed up at me happily as I added more tuna to the plate. Once he had his fill, he walked over and jumped up on the couch making himself at home. I scoffed, “Dude, come on. You smell like something out of Pet Semetary.” He had the audacity to start wallowing around on his back. I rolled my eyes as I made my way to the linen closet, pulling out a spare blanket. After moving back to the couch, I opened up the blanket and fluffed it out next to him. He wasted no time settling in, purring and making biscuits with his paws. I gave him some scratches behind the ears as he dozed off. It was clear to me now, this cat was obviously trying to move in. With a heavy sigh, I realized that I needed to get some cat stuff for the house if this was going to be a thing, but I wasn’t even sure where to start with that. It was just another thing to worry about, but I sort of didn’t mind. He was definitely growing on me, making the house feel less empty and me less alone.
Friday rehearsals went by in a blur. I arrived a few minutes early, finding Kat in the studio, ready to go. She seemed in good spirits as we joked through our morning coffee. Her twinkling laugh continued as we went through our stretch routine. I moaned and groaned through the torture while she bent my body to its limits, and I loved every fucking minute of it. I noticed that our new found comfort with each other had her leaning into me more. Her touches were more casual and relaxed. I couldn’t get enough of the feeling of her warmth against me or the brilliant smile on her face as she laughed at my ridiculousness. The hint of sadness that I noticed hidden in her eyes the last couple of days was nowhere in sight.
Once we moved into the routine, the air between us felt like it was crackling again. Heated glances and small smiles passed between us as we made it through the entirety of the dance several times without error. We were so in tune with each other now, dancing in silence as one. Moving effortlessly through the steps without any thought or hesitation from either of us. The world fell away at that moment. We could have been in the midst of a war zone, and I wouldn’t have noticed. All I saw was her. There was no question about it now, I definitely had feelings for her that were more than just physical attraction. I couldn’t keep denying it to myself.
Of course, Alec was technically still in the picture. Kat made a point to say that she hadn’t ended things with him. She had only asked for space. I was still determined not to put her in any type of compromising position. I had too much respect for her to do that, my own feelings be damned. I really needed to watch myself.
After a few hours, we finally took a break. I lay sprawled out on the floor, staring up at her as she drank from her water bottle. I could see the sweat running down her neck, disappearing in the hidden space between her breasts. I had to force my eyes upward to her face before little Bravo decided to wake up against my wishes.
When she finished, she turned to me, catching me staring. I didn’t even bother to look away. She gave me a shy smile as she sat down on the floor next to me.
“So, what are you up to this evening? More plant daddy responsibilities?”
I snorted, “Plant daddy? That’s one I haven’t heard before.”
Kat snickered before taking another sip of water.
“No, actually I need to go to the pet store…hey, do you know anything about cats?”
Her brow furrowed, “Is this some kind of weird joke that I’m about to walk into?”
I chuckled, “No, I’m serious. I’m talking about the feline kind. I’ve had this stray show up at my house and he won’t fucking leave. Somehow that’s turned into him becoming a roommate. I’m having issues finding food he’ll eat though. I also don’t know what sort of cat stuff I need if I bring him inside like he seems to want to do.”
She chuckled, a mischievous glint in her eye as she said, “So, you’re a cat daddy now, too?”
I shrugged with a smirk, “Yeah, I guess I’m trying to be.”
She had a look on her face that I couldn’t decipher before breaking into a smile.
“Yeah, I had cats growing up. They can be finicky and dramatic when it comes to food.”
I nodded, “Yeah, I’ve picked up on that...What should I do? Can you give me a list of stuff I need to get? I’ve never had a pet, so I have no idea where to start.”
Her face softened, “You’re going to the pet store after you leave here?”
I nodded, curious what her tone meant. She paused before answering, seeming somewhat hesitant at first, “I could go with you if you want?”
I felt one side of my lips tug upward, “That would be amazing, actually.”
Kat was true to her word. Once we finished rehearsal, she followed me to the pet store. Parking in the space next to mine and smiling as she exited her car. As she walked toward me, I realized it made me feel strangely giddy to be doing something like this with her.
She hooked her arm with mine as we walked toward the entrance. I could feel warmth spreading in my chest at her casual touches. I had to fight the smile tugging at my lips.
“So, what is your fur child actually eating?” She asked.
I grimaced, “Well, up until like a week or so ago, I assume whatever he could catch and kill. Honestly, he smells like something out of that Pet Semetary movie…which reminds me…have you ever given a cat a bath?”
It was her turn to grimace, “Are you insane? Cats usually don’t like water. There are professionals that will do that for you, ya know?”
I shook my head, “This kid is not used to people. I fear he wouldn’t be able to handle a grooming salon. At least not yet…”
She sighed, giving me a serious wide-eyed stare, “Fine, I’ll help you give the cat a bath…but if I die…I’m haunting your ass.”
I belly laughed at her response as we entered the store, which seemed to draw some eyes toward us. I dropped my head and moved toward the first aisle as Kat got a shopping cart.
“A cart, huh? How much of my money are you about to spend?”
She chuckled, “Hey, I’m just making recommendations. You do what you will with them.”
She pointed things out as we moved down the aisles, some of it just for fun, some of it was needed. I ended up splurging on a couple of robotic litter boxes and cat cave beds, bathing supplies, toys, a ridiculously massive cat tree, and a collar all before getting to the food. She was relentless with her teasing about my need to buy the most expensive thing on the shelf. I loved it when she teased me like this. It caused her eyes to light up in a way that made my heart race.
Once we got to the food aisle, she again asked what the cat was currently eating.
“The only thing I’ve been successful with so far is Tuna. I’ve gotten several different kinds of cat food, and he just turns his nose up to them.”
She stood staring down the aisle with too many options, scrunching up her nose before speaking again. “OK, so he likes fishy stuff. Have you tried dry food or wet food?”
She is too fucking adorable when she makes that face. My brows arched at her, “Both.”
Her lips set into a line, “Did you try salmon flavored?”
I scoffed, “I’m pretty sure I tried every flavor they have. They were all a no.”
Her brow furrowed as she looked up and down the aisle, thinking. Her eyes finally settled on a freezer at the far end, “Maybe he would prefer something a little fresher since he’s a hunter?”
My eyes widened, “I hope you don’t mean like…live rats or something. I’m not doing that.”
She snorted, “Noooo. Ugh, no. I would never suggest that. I meant raw food.”
My eyes widened, “Ohhh. I hadn’t thought of that. Maybe…I’m willing to give it a try.”
We made our way down to the freezer and she picked out a raw salmon food. It was small scoopable frozen nuggets full of organic ingredients. It honestly sounded better than the other stuff I had bought. At least I could pronounce everything on the label. I felt confident this might do the trick. It figures I would end up with a cat that had a taste for the fancy stuff.
As we walked down the last couple of aisles, I circled back to the bath conversation, “Sooo, were you serious about helping give the Little Dude a bath?”
She nodded with a smirk, “Yes, I meant every word I said.”
I chuckled, “You wanna come over tomorrow evening for that? I can get everything set up for him tonight. I’ll let him formally move in after he’s bathed.”
She made an annoyed face, “Tomorrow is spray tan day.”
I puffed air out through my cheeks. “I could get some of those long dish washing gloves, then we won’t get wet…and maybe protect us from being clawed to death too.”
She snorted, “That sounds like a plan.”
“I’ll make dinner. I have a feeling I’ll owe you by the time this is over...”
One of her brows ticked upward, “I know I said I would never say no to food, but…you’re gonna cook?”
I placed my hand on my chest, feigning offense. “Excuse me? I happen to be a very good cook. It’s another new hobby I’ve picked up since rehab. My stuff is better than any five star restaurant.”
The sound of her twinkling laugh filled my ears. “Riiiight. I’ll believe it when I see it,” she said between laughs.
I rolled my eyes and gave her a playful smile, “Fine. Be prepared to stick your foot in your mouth.”
Kat chuckled as we approached the checkout counter. We were surprised when the young lady behind the counter nervously asked if she could take a picture with us. We of course agreed and snapped a quick group selfie with the girl. We made small talk with her as she rang up my items. I explained how I had a new visitor show up and Kat was kind enough to show me what all I needed to buy, suddenly worried the girl might get the wrong idea about why we were there together. I had a feeling this would show up on social media at some point.
Kat helped me load everything into the back of my car before giving me a small smile and asking to let her know how the new food goes over with the Little Dude. I thanked her again with a cheesy grin before we both got into our vehicles and headed to our respective homes.
It was a little after 9PM and I was deep into cat tree assembly when I received a text from Kat asking how dinner went. I pursed my lips as my fingers hovered over the keypad. Instead of typing out a message, I hit the video call button. I almost thought she was going to send me to voicemail, but she finally answered, her eyes wide as they jumped around the screen. It looked like she was lying in bed in a dimly lit room. Her hair fell around her face in damp waves, like maybe she had just showered. She looked beautiful. It took me a few seconds too long to find my voice.
“Hey, sorry, are you in bed?” I finally managed to sputter out.
She smiled, “I’m in bed, but not sleeping. Just watching trashy TV and doom scrolling. How did the new food go?”
I smiled at the screen, “Amazing. He devoured it…didn’t even hesitate.”
She smiled back at me, “Good. Happy to hear it. What is he up to now?”
I huffed out a laugh, “Laying at the end of the sectional, silently judging me over my struggles to put this damn cat tree together. I swear you have to be a fucking engineer to figure it out.”
I turned on the front camera of my phone to show her the cat, stretched out on his stinky blanket at the end of the couch as he gave me that judgy stare. She laughed loudly.
“Oooh he’s pretty! He does look very judgy right now though.”
I switched the camera back to me, “This is the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever seen. Why are there so many parts?”
“Hey, you’re the one that had to get the biggest one they had in the store. Deal with the consequences. I told you that you should’ve just asked for the floor model that was already put together.”
“Ummm, no. I wasn’t about to buy something that’s had a million grubby little hands on it and who knows what else. Dude only gets the best…brand new out of the box.”
She rolled her eyes at me, “Did you try looking at the instructions? I know that’s hard for guys to do.”
I scoffed and rattled the paper in front of the camera, “Umm…excuse me? I have been looking at the instructions and they’re garbage. Do you SEE this? It’s literally really bad drawings with no words. I can’t tell the pieces apart. It’s bullshit.”
She let out a loud laugh at my dramatics, covering her mouth with her hand to try and hold it back. I loved seeing her like this. A small part of me wondered what it would be like to lay in bed with her, laughing at trashy TV shows while we were wrapped up in each other under the covers. I shook my head slightly to clear that thought.
“Is this your way of asking me to help you, without actually asking…out of fear of further judgment?”
I furrowed my brows and snorted, “I’m not afraid to ask. Judge me, I don’t care. I have no shame…but if you’re offering…”
“Send me a picture of the instructions. I’ll hold your hand through it.”
I rolled my eyes, “Oh yeah, thanks. You had to go and say it like that.”
I did send her the instructions and we spent the next hour and a half on facetime putting the cat tree together. She had my full attention every time she would pull up the drawings to look at them. Her face would scrunch up in the most adorable way as she tried to figure out the next steps. The only thing that could have made the day more perfect is if she had been here with me in person.
Once the tree was put together, we said goodnight. I noticed Kat lingered on the call for a moment before finally ending it. It caused my stomach to flip. I wished I knew what she was thinking. Is she feeling this too? Or am I just being delusional?
After getting Dude settled in the garage for the evening, I finally crawled into bed. I laid there thinking about what I should cook for dinner. I didn’t want to do anything too over the top, but I did want to impress her. Then I moved on to picturing her in my house, in my space. Us in my space together. It was almost overwhelming. Realizing how badly I wanted that almost scared me.
Sunday rehearsals flew by. We did the last of our fine tuning to the routine, running through it several times with the music track. We nailed it each time. The flirty aspect of the dance seemed to come to us easily now. There was no longer any lingering awkwardness between us. We were both comfortable and trusting of each other and having fun.
We ended up leaving rehearsals a little early to get over to Television City Studios for the cast spray tanning session. We were hoping to get finished quicker by getting there before everyone else. I also felt like Kat was trying to avoid Alec too, which gave me a surge of excitement. It gave me hope that she was possibly thinking about ending things with him for good.
After heading to our respective dressing rooms to get changed into our robes, we found each other again outside the large room used for the spray tan setup. To our surprise they were able to get us in quickly. Kat went in first, then they called me in several minutes later. After I was finished, I wandered back to my dressing room and changed into my gym shorts. I took a minute to dig around in my duffel bag for a t-shirt that I didn’t care for in case the spray tan rubbed off on it. There was no sense in ruining all of my shirts for this shit.
There was a quiet knock on the door, I moved to unlock and open it, assuming it was Kat. She stood there, eyes racking over me with a smirk on her face. I gave her a quick smile as I turned my attention back to my bag, “I’m almost ready…just trying to find a shirt that I don’t care to mess up.”
She came in and leaned against the countertop of the vanity, “No problem, take your time.” She sounded amused. I glanced up at her, she had her arms crossed over her chest as she watched me with one brow raised. “Is something funny?” I asked.
“Every time I come in here, you're half naked.”
I found the shirt I was looking for and pulled it out, standing to my full height to face her, “If that’s the case, why do you keep coming in here then?”
Her face reddened, “Touché. You got me there.”
I laughed, “Yeah, see how that works? I mean…it’s a dressing room. There’s bound to be various stages of undress happening. Don’t act so shocked. At least I have pants on this time.”
She rolled her eyes before looking away. I moved to put my shirt on, purposely taking my time to pull it down over my head. Just as I yanked it down over my face, I caught her eyes shifting away from me. She was definitely checking me out. I could see it in the flush of her cheeks. Well, that's interesting. Maybe she was feeling the spark between us just as much as I am. It doesn’t matter, Bravo. She’s technically still taken.
I turned to pile all of my junk back into my bag, pretending I hadn’t noticed her staring. She finally broke the silence, “So, what are you making me for dinner? I need to start preparing myself now if I’m to survive it.”
I scoffed, “Come on. Give me some credit. You should know by now that I excel in all my extracurricular activities.”
Her eyes widened briefly, a small smirk playing on her lips, “I won’t believe it until I have firsthand experience as proof.”
Are we still talking about cooking? I felt like this conversation had a double meaning. I gave her a cocky grin, “Then prepare yourself for the most…pleasurable…food experience of your life.”
She snorted out a laugh as she moved toward the door, “Right. We’ll see.” I grabbed my bag and followed behind her. Within minutes, I was in my car, driving toward my house with Kat following behind me. I tried not to think of what the evening held, but I knew I needed to behave myself. I had to keep reminding myself that I couldn’t cross any lines with her, no matter how badly I now realized I wanted to.
A short time later, I was keying into my front door with Kat standing close behind me, taking in her surroundings. I was suddenly nervous for her to see my home. It made me feel naked in a different kind of way that I wasn’t prepared for. She would be seeing pieces of me that no one outside of my very small inner circle had. I would be opening myself up to her in a very raw and unfiltered way and I worried she wouldn’t like what she found.
We were both quiet as she entered the living room. There was a small smile playing on her lips as she slowly walked around the space, running her hands over things as she went. Stopping to look at books and little knick-knacks I had sitting around from my travels. My stomach quickly rose to my throat when she focused on the paintings hanging on the walls. There were several duotone abstract pieces I had painted throughout my early days of recovery - visual representations of where I was emotionally at the time I painted them. I had hung them to remind myself of my progress. She spent a lot more time looking at these than anything else, raising her hand to touch the one closest to her.
“These are amazing,” she said quietly, almost to herself.
I could hear my heart pounding in my ears as I watched her fingers drop down to the rounded DB initials in the bottom right corner. Her eyes suddenly widening as realization set in. She turned to me, her face now lit up in a way I had never seen. Her eyes were sparkling with wonder as she peered up at me. “Dieter…d-did you paint these?”
I nodded shyly. I couldn’t speak, afraid that my emotions would reveal themselves to her. It meant more to me than I expected that she liked them. Now realizing that her opinion was the only one that ever really mattered to me.
She smiled, “Well…I guess you do seem to excel in your extracurriculars. I can’t wait to see what else you have up your sleeve.”
I smirked at her, swiping my thumb across my lip before speaking. “Hmm, well…I’ll have your mouth watering within the hour. You wanna help me get started?”
One of her brows twitched upward, “I’d be happy to.”
I led her to the kitchen and began pulling ingredients out of the refrigerator and pantry. She stood nearby, taking everything in.
“I’m actually a little jealous of your kitchen. This is nice and so are all your gadgets.”
I chuckled, “I do spend a lot of time in here. A fancy kitchen was one of my requirements when I moved.”
She nodded, then pointed at the speaker on the counter. “Do you usually play music while you cook?”
“Yeah, you wanna turn something on?”
“Sure, it’s almost too quiet in here. I like a little background noise.”
I pulled my phone out of my pocket and opened up the music streaming app - hitting play on whatever playlist was already queued up. A soulful blues song started emitting from the speaker. Kat smiled and nodded in approval. I went back to pulling out the rest of the ingredients, piling everything that needed chopping near the cutting board on the island then grabbed two knives from the drawer.
“Can you handle chopping the veggies? It’ll make this go a lot faster.”
She nodded, then took one of the knives and got to work chopping the mushrooms that I sat in front of her. We worked side-by-side in silence for a few minutes. My mind wandered to thoughts of how domesticated this felt. I liked it…too much.
My attention was suddenly drawn back to Kat as her hips started moving to the rhythm of the music. Fuck, that’s distracting. I placed my hand on the small of her back, causing her to pause and look up at me, “You’re gonna chop a finger off moving around like that.”
The side of her lip tugged upward as she peered at me through her lashes, “Don’t worry…I’m a pro at my extracurriculars too. I can do a lotta things with my hands while my hips are moving.”
I sucked in a sharp breath at her words, my mind started running through all the possibilities behind them and none of it was wholesome. I finally managed to choke out a laugh, before going back to chopping the celery I had started on. Kat continued moving to the music beside me, humming along with the chorus. Fucking hell, I’m gonna chop my own finger off if I don’t watch it. The next song started playing. I was too distracted by Kat’s rolling hips and my thoughts that I didn’t realize what it was until the chorus hit.
Fuck me like you mean it / Make me believe it / Walk the wire, it's alright / Love me like you need it / 'Cause I can feel it / Take it higher, show me why
The knife in my hand clattered down onto the cutting board, I was slightly mortified.
Kat’s movements paused, “Well, I didn’t see that coming…that's a little dirty...” She snickered.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t realize what song this was…. I’ll change it.”
Kat placed her hand on my forearm as I turned to grab my phone, “No, I actually kind of like his sound. Leave it.”
Her hip movements continued as I switched to chopping the carrots and her the tomatoes. I wasn’t sure how much more of this I could take. I stood there willing my dick not to get hard. Luckily, I got through the carrots quickly, and took the opportunity to turn my back to her. Moving on to peel and cut an onion under the cold water from the faucet. Which is probably just as well, because another song by the same artist came on that was sending my mind straight to the gutter. It felt like a playlist straight from my debauched thoughts.
Hypnotic lover taking over my mind / Your spell is binding, makes it so hard to fight / She twists her hips and keeps it coming all night / I can't control myself, that girl is so fine
Thankfully we finished with all the vegetable cutting soon after that. I moved on to preparing the pork and getting the frying pan and oil up to temperature. I was happy to have something that required my focus. Kat appeared, leaning against the counter next to the stove, watching me intently.
“So, are you ever gonna tell me what you’re cooking?”
I smirked, “Pork cacciatore.”
She gave me a deadpan stare, “You do know I’m a vegetarian, right?”
I was briefly hit with a streak of panic, before I realized she was messing with me. She had eaten a steak burrito in front of me, twice. I let out a dramatic sigh then smiled, “I guess I’ll be eating alone then. Oh well, more for me.”
She laughed as she playfully smacked my shoulder. I moved in front of her, placing my hand on her hip to scoot her out of the way as I reached above her head to get into the cabinet that housed all the spices. I muttered a quiet “excuse me” as I glanced down at her eyes that were looking up at me through her lashes. She didn’t really move. Instead, she stayed pinned between me and the counter. I could hear the faint sound of her breath hitching at my proximity. I smirked, then turned my attention back to the cabinet, pulling out the dried rosemary, oregano, and basil before finally removing my hand from her hip and stepping back to the stove. I could feel her eyes on me the entire time.
As I started mixing in all the ingredients to simmer, she leaned down on her elbows and inhaled deeply, “Mmm…you were right. My mouth is watering. This smells amazing.”
I gave her a cocky smile, “I told you….and it tastes better than it smells. It’s like an orgasm for your taste buds.”
Shit. I probably shouldn’t have said that. My mouth got ahead of my brain. Her tinkling laugh filled my ears, “That’s a lot of confidence you’ve got in your cooking skills, Bravo.”
I shrugged, “I promised you a pleasurable experience. I’m just delivering on my word.”
Fucking hell, I’m being ridiculous and getting out of line. Reel it in, Bravo!
She didn’t seem phased by my comments, if anything it felt like she was enjoying the banter.
We soon sat down at the dinner table, which I couldn’t recall ever actually sitting at to eat. Kat proceeded to moan through several bites and gush about how delicious it was. I couldn’t help the smile that spread across my face. It made me feel almost giddy that she enjoyed it. Our conversation flowed easily, as we talked about different things. Getting to know each other a little more and slowly chipping away at that imaginary wall that separated us.
“I’m just gonna start coming over here for dinner every night. My cooking can’t compete with this,” she finally said with a joking tone as she scooped that last bite off her plate.
I gave her a toothy grin, “I’ll cook for you anytime you want me to.”
She laughed, “Don’t make promises you can’t keep.”
I laughed it off, but she had no idea how fucking serious I was. I would cook for her every night of forever if she’d let me.
After several minutes of Kat fussing over helping with the dishes, I finally convinced her to let it be. I had a housekeeper that would take care of it in the morning, so it really wasn’t that big of a deal. We decided to take our chances by giving the Little Dude a bath after that. I led her out to the garage which was still a mess with boxes, but Dude didn’t seem to mind it. He had turned it into his own personal playground.
I had set up everything we would need for a bath next to the utility sink so we could get right to it. Kat grabbed one of the towels and laid it out on the counter and got the brushes ready, saying we should brush out all the mats first. As she was explaining the steps we should take, Little Dude decided to make his presence known. He came strutting out from somewhere in his box fort to meow out me. He then proceeded to rub up against Kat’s legs. She giggled at him, bending down to pick him up.
“Ooof, he is rank,” she said through a chuckle.
“I told you. I swear he rolled in something dead.”
She grimaced, moving him away from her body to sit him on the counter.
“He’s really pretty though. He seems young. Have you taken him to the vet yet?”
“Not yet. I’m working up to it. I didn’t wanna stress him out too much all at once…though…he seems strangely fine with everything. He’s the one that wants to move in,” I said - laughing quietly to myself over the absurdity of it.
Kat began to look him over, “He has some pretty bad mats under his arms, we may have to cut those. Do you have scissors? They aren’t too close to the skin, so I think I can cut them easily enough.”
“Uhh, yeah. I have a whole clipper kit with scissors. I’ll go get it.”
I ran to get the kit and was back within minutes to find Little Dude sprawled out on his back while Kat brushed at the hair on his stomach. He seemed to love the attention. I stood next to Kat, keeping him distracted with pets while she worked. She ended up cutting a lot of the mats out just to save time. After several minutes had passed, she turned to me, a concerned look on her face.
“What? Is something wrong?” I asked.
“I would say so. We have a major problem here.”
My stomach was suddenly in my throat. My mind now conjuring up the worst things, “What is it?”
She fought to hold back a laugh, “Dude is not a dude.”
My brow furrowed, “What do you mean?”
She snorted, “There is no twig and berries down there. Dude is a Dudette.”
“Seriously? You’re joking?”
“Nope. Did you even check?”
“Do you see how much hair she has? I was just guessing. I couldn’t tell. It makes sense why she wouldn’t leave though…chics do love me.”
Kat snorted again, “Staaap. You’re so ridiculous.”
I chuckled, “At least now I know why I was getting the judgy looks.”
“Well, now you need to give her a proper name. Something cute…that is not Dudette.”
“Yeah, I guess I’ll have to think about it. Damn.”
After a brief pause to laugh about our discovery. We continued. Luckily the cat’s top half wasn’t as bad, so Kat made quick work of it. Then we took a minute to prepare ourselves for the chaos of the bath. Strategizing on the best way to handle it if she freaked out. It turns out, we didn’t even need to do that. The cat apparently loved water, which blew our minds. She sat still, enjoying the massage we gave her as we worked the shampoo into her fur. She nearly fell asleep as I used the spray head to rinse her, occasionally pointing the stream in Kat’s direction just to be obnoxious. After reminding me that we had just gotten a spray tan, I stopped. She said I wouldn’t be able to endure her wrath if I made her streaky.
Once we got the Little Dudette clean and dry, I picked her up and brought her inside. I took a minute to show her where the litter boxes were, her beds, and her new cat tree. I sat her at the top of the cat tree, and she immediately began exploring it. Kat and I watched her for a few minutes, before Kat looked around the room.
“Hmmm…the plants could be an issue. I know some are poisonous to cats.”
My eyes widened. I hadn’t even thought about that. Damn I already suck at this cat dad stuff.
Kat pulled out her phone and found a list of toxic plants and let me look over it. I sucked air through my teeth, then moved to pick up the Aloe plant sitting on the end table, “Sorry Barb. Looks like you’re gonna be banished to the art studio.” I handed it to Kat, “Please hold Barb for a moment.”
She started laughing at me. I turned to grab the Cutleaf Philodendron that was sitting in the dining room. “You’re out too, Cutlet,” I said as I picked up the medium sized tropical plant.
“Follow me. We’ll put these away in another room.”
As we made our way through the house, I grabbed another Aloe plant that was sitting on a bookshelf. “Sorry, you’re out too, Spike.”
I could hear Kat snickering behind me as we ascended the stairs. Once we reached the door to my studio, I juggled the plants in my arms to turn the knob. I suddenly felt nervous for Kat to be in the space, but tried not to dwell on it as I pushed the door open with my foot. She followed me inside and set Barb down on the window sill next to Spike. I set Cutlet down on the desk. I’d have to find a spot for him later.
I could tell Kat wanted to explore the room, but she held back, shyly looking down at the ground instead. I was sure she could sense this was an extremely personal space for me and didn’t want to intrude.
“You can look around if you want.” I finally mustered up the courage to say. I trusted her enough to share this side of myself. Not many people got to see it.
Her eyes lit up with excitement, “Are you sure? I don’t wanna make you uncomfortable.”
I nodded and gave her a small smile. Standing back to watch as she walked around the room looking at the various paintings leaned against the walls. Her eyes roamed over every surface, pausing to spend extra time on the sketches spread out on the tables and desk.
I hadn’t spent any time in this room since rehearsals started. I hadn’t had the time, and when I did, I was too tired. However, I suddenly had that nagging need to. There were images swirling in my head that I needed to get out onto a canvas. I was shocked to find they were colorful shades of purple and blue with hints of magenta. There was no black in sight. I knew the cause of the shift, it was Kat. She was my new muse. Replacing the self-hatred and unhappiness with her light. I wanted to paint her dancing with the fire in her eyes. I wanted to sketch all of my favorite parts of her - her lips, her eyes, the curve of her hips.
Seeing her in my home and how easily she could fit into my life was making me want things I never thought I would. I wanted her to be part of everything. My other half. I wanted to share my existence with her. Then reality set in. She still belongs to someone else, Bravo. Stop thinking like this.
I shook my head to clear it as she looked my way with a smile. I tried to return it, but it didn’t reach my eyes. She walked toward me, “Dieter, all of this is amazing. I-I don’t have any words. You’re so talented.”
My brow furrowed, I was suddenly feeling emotional. I murmured a quiet “thanks” to her as she turned to look around the room one last time before turning back to me, “Would you paint something…for me? I would love to have one.”
I gave her a genuine smile now, “Of course. I think I already have an idea for something.”
Our gazes locked for a moment, something unsaid lingering between us, but it passed. I motioned toward the door, “Well, would you like a tour of the rest of the place? I have a feeling you might enjoy my other sanctuary.”
She gave me a quizzical look, “Lead the way. You have me intrigued now.”
I snickered as we walked into the hallway and closed the door behind us. I led Kat down the hall to the room where I did everything else - music, reading, writing. It really was my other sanctuary. It was a large open room with glass doors that opened to the balcony overlooking the ocean. The espresso colored hardwood was covered by a deep navy and maroon Persian area rug. Floor to ceiling shelves lined one cream colored wall, full of books and scripts. Two leather chairs sat in one corner with two acoustic guitars perched on stands between them. Several other guitars hung on the wall nearby. Another wall of shelves housed my record collection. The old record player stood next to it, connected to vintage floor speakers. An espresso colored wicker hanging chair with a white cushion hung from the ceiling in the corner near the record player. An extra large white furry beanbag sat nearby, with a few deep yellow throw pillows on it. There were plants everywhere - large potted ones sitting on the floor, vines hanging from the ceiling, small succulents scattered throughout the shelves. A small writing desk sat against the wall next to the balcony doors. The few open spaces on the wall were home to more of my paintings. The center of the room was completely open. Aside from my studio, it was my favorite place to be.
When I opened the door and motioned for Kat to enter, her face shifted. A hint of a smile ghosted her lips as her eyes rounded and sparkled. She stood in the center of the room turning in a slow circle, taking in the space.
“Dieter…you’re right. I love this. Everything about it is perfect.”
She walked over to one of the paintings, an abstract sunset of black, deep blue, red, and yellow. It was a more recent one, not as dark as the ones downstairs. Her fingers grazed over the DB scrawled in the bottom corner. One side of her lip turned upward once she realized it was another one of my paintings. She turned, moving back toward the center of the room and spun around with her arms out.
“This room is huge…big enough we could rehearse in here.”
My teeth sunk into my bottom lip, biting back a smile. I loved that the thought had crossed her mind. That she wanted to be in this space with me.
“We could. There’s a lot of open space. I left it like that so I could come in here and paint if I wanted. Depending on the time of day, the lighting can be better here than in the studio. Plus, I can open the doors and hear the ocean. It’s soothing.”
She nodded, a pensive look on her face as she continued looking around the room.
“I take it you probably didn’t expect all this, huh?”
She shook her head as her brows pinched together, “No, honestly. I’m not sure what I expected, but strangely enough, I’m not surprised. I know you're not shallow and emotionless like the tabloids often make you out to be.”
She was standing in front of me now, her eyes roaming my face. “I see you, Dieter. I know you feel things deeply…even if you don’t always admit to it. So, it doesn’t surprise me that this is how you spend your time. Us tortured souls have to get the feelings out somehow.”
I couldn’t breathe. The way she was looking at me literally took my breath away. I knew without a doubt that she meant what she said. She did understand me better than anyone ever had because we were the same in a lot of ways, but complete opposites in others. We balanced each other out and fit together in a way that filled in each other's gaps to make a whole. We were meant to find each other, I could feel it in my bones. If only she could see that and finally get rid of the disease in her life that was Alec.
Kat’s face turned almost wistful as she stared at me for a beat. Finally turning away and moving toward the leather chairs in the corner and sitting down. She turned, eyeing the acoustic guitars sitting next to her.
She pointed, “Are these for decoration or do you actually play?”
I shrugged, “I guess you can call it that…I had to learn for a role many years ago. It kind of stayed with me after that.”
She raised a brow in my direction as her hand slid around the neck of the nearest instrument, “Do you mind…” she asked, pausing for my response.
Curious where this was going, I shook my head. “No, I don’t. Have at it.”
The way she handled it told me this was something she was familiar with. I could hear the blood pumping in my ears from excitement at the thought that she might play something. I shuffled over to sit in the seat next to her and picked up the other instrument as her fingers slid over the strings, like she was getting a feel for it. I bit back the anxious feeling that was forming in my chest and started plucking at the strings on the guitar I had just picked up. Playing chords for the first song that came to mind.
Kat watched me for a moment. Her eyes narrowed at my hands, “I know this song…”
I smiled up at her as she hummed along for a few seconds, trying to place it. She surprised me when she started to sing along.
She's the place I go / When there's nowhere left to run to / She's the one I hold / When there's no one to hold on to
I was awed by her. Her voice was amazing - soulful, velvety, and pure. She was so fucking beautiful it hurt. The moment caused something to swell inside of me, making me emotional. I had to take a deep breath to fight it back as I watched her place her fingers on the frets and start strumming along with me. She continued singing the chorus. Without thinking, I joined in, which elicited a brilliant smile from her.
She's been with me late at night / When I was drowning in the dark / She heard my every word / When I was pouring out my heart / So I thank my lucky stars / For every crack, scratch, and scar on this guitar
Our voices harmonized together perfectly, causing goosebumps to break out across my body. I suddenly felt connected to her in a way that I hadn’t before. I picked up the next verse as she continued playing with me.
She's given me her best / When I am at my worst / When I can't find the pieces / Fingers scratching in the dirt / She offers no forgiveness / 'Cause she likes to make it hurt
Her eyes stayed on mine. I could see the fire blazing in them again. I couldn’t help smiling as the words passed through my lips. She returned it as she joined back in for the chorus. We finished the reminder of the song with a flourish, breaking into laughter when it was done.
Once the laughter settled, I finally asked, “Why didn’t you tell me you played? And can sing for that matter?”
She shrugged, “It’s not really something I do a lot of anymore…Not since my dad passed. He taught me to play when I was younger…before things got bad with him. We picked it up again after he was sober.”
A sad smile formed on her lips, “He had a few friends he would play with on the weekends…pickin' and grinnin' is what they called it. Just a bunch of friends and their families hanging out in someone's backyard, having fun. I learned a lot from them.”
I had a sudden urge to hug her, but then the sparkle from that damn engagement ring on her finger caught my attention for the first time that evening. It was a stark contrast against the black bout of the guitar, silently screaming a reminder that she was still with the asshole. It broke through the delusional thoughts that had started to swirl around in my head the last few minutes.
I cleared my throat, “Well, you’re really good. I didn’t see that coming.”
She gave me a genuine smile now, “You’re not so bad yourself. Still excelling in all areas apparently.”
I had the sudden need to be away from her. I was feeling overwhelmed by my conflicting feelings. I glanced down at my watch, “Hmm…it’s getting late. We should probably call it a night. I don’t wanna be your excuse for being tired tomorrow.” I let out a nervous laugh.
She looked at her watch, “Oh damn. Yeah, it is…and I still have a 30 minute drive home.”
An awkward tension settled in the air as I placed the guitars back on their stands. We walked in silence down the stairs. Kat took a minute to give the kitty some scratches before collecting her purse and phone to leave. I asked her to let me know when she made it home as she leaned in for a side hug.
“I will…and thanks for dinner. It was amazing.”
When she pulled away, her hand lingered at my waist. She smiled before finally turning to walk toward her car. I kept an eye on her until she was locked inside and backing out of the driveway. This was getting to be too fucking hard.
I sighed, walking through the house to turn everything off and lock up for the night. The cat followed behind me every step of the way. Once I got settled in the bed, I felt her jump onto the mattress. She tentatively walked over and climbed up on my chest, purring into my hand as I scratched behind her ears.
“Maybe you're meant to be the only woman in my life. I should probably accept that and move on.”
Her eyes drooped under my touch. A quiet meow squeaked out in response.
“I guess I should give you a proper name now, because Dude is not gonna cut it.”
I thought for a minute. A plant name might be cute, right? “How about poppy? Ehh, no. That might raise some eyebrows given who your dad is. Let’s avoid drug references…”
I laughed to myself. It was so ridiculous that I had to think about stuff like that.
“Hmm, how about Rosie? Na…that’s too girly. You’re kind of a bad ass critter catcher.”
She meowed loudly, almost like she was agreeing with me. I chuckled. “I’ve got it. Zinnia. Zee for short. That’s cool, right?”
She was asleep now. She could have cared less. “Zee it is. Zee my little warrior queen.”
I got a text from Kat a few minutes later, letting me know she got home. I sent her a thumbs up emoji then set the phone on its docking station for the night. I somehow managed to drift off to sleep.
I was woken up about ten minutes before my alarm went off by Zee, making biscuits in the crook of my arm and purring. I couldn’t even be upset about it because it was too fucking cute. This cat was already making me melt and had me wrapped around her paw. I nuzzled my face into her fur, she smelled so much better. It was nice to finally have her properly clean so I could cuddle her without being grossed out. I don’t know why I fought against having her for so long. It felt nice to have another living being in the house with me.
I finally rolled out of bed and took a quick shower. It was show day, so I couldn’t be dicking around this morning. I threw on clean shorts and a t-shirt, then headed out. I stopped to get our usual cups of coffee before heading to Television City Studios. Kat and I were one of the first groups there, determined to get the rough run through out of the way.
Kat was already chatting with the band when I walked in and handed her coffee over. We went through the routine a few times to get the camera blocking out of the way and gave feedback on the music. The other couples had started to filter in by the time we were on our last run through. I could see Alec sitting, waiting for his and Lana’s turn. I hadn’t seen him since the incident, so I wasn’t sure what the damage was. His face was pretty bruised up around the nose and under the eyes. I had to hold back the satisfied smile that was tugging at my lips as we walked by him.
Kat did take a minute to add some makeup to my knuckles. They were still a little bruised. We didn’t want the cast to see it if we could help it. After she finished, we headed into hair and makeup to get slathered in more makeup and hair gel.
Kat and I were seated next to each other again. We chatted with each other while they worked on us. I told her what I decided to name the cat. She laughed at first but wasn’t at all surprised that it was the name of a plant. She finally relented, admitting that it was cute and giving her seal of approval.
About 30 minutes after sitting down in the makeup chair, Anika approached me. She had a shy, but flirty smile on her face as she leaned against the vanity in front of my seat and purred out a “good morning.”
I smiled at her awkwardly, unsure of what was happening. Anika glanced toward Kat, then turned so that her back was toward her.
“What are you doing after the show tonight?” she finally asked.
I shrugged, “I don’t know yet. I suppose it depends on how tired I am.”
She laughed like I had just told the most hilarious joke. I now realized what was happening. Fucking hell. Please don’t do it.
Her hand rested on my knee, “How about we go out for drinks after? Maybe we can hang out for a bit.” She gave a suggestive squeeze with her fingers as she spoke.
I could tell from my reflection that I had the deer in headlights look. My brain completely shut down. I was not interested in the least. “Umm, I dunno. I really need to get home…and feed my cat.”
“Oh, come on, just one drink. You can do that after.”
It was Kat who responded with an agitated tone, “You do realize he’s sober, right?”
Anika looked surprised, then laughed nervously. “Well in that case, you can just watch me drink. You don’t have to have anything with alcohol.”
I sat there with my mouth agape, not really sure how to respond to that. I couldn’t stop anyone from drinking around me, but damn. If she was trying to win me over, that was not the way to do it.
“Are you a fucking idiot? He’s sober. He doesn’t wanna be around alcohol.” Kat was having none of this from her.
Anika huffed, “I don’t think I asked you, Katarina. Mind your business. Shouldn’t you be worried about what your own man is up to?”
I realized the ladies that had been doing our hair and makeup had stepped back. Kat looked like she was about to come up out of her seat after this girl. I cleared my throat, “Ummm thanks for the offer, Anika…but I think I’ll pass. Maybe another time?” I said nervously.
She gave me a disappointed look before flipping Kat off and walking out of the room.
Kat puffed air out of her cheeks, “Ugh, I fucking hate that girl.”
The ladies who were working on us snickered before continuing with their task.
I glanced over at Kat, “Thank you for that. I wasn’t really sure how to handle it.”
“Well, you better figure it out, because I’m sure she’s not done asking. Unless you wanna go out with her, of course.” Her tone was very clipped, and I wasn’t sure why. It surprised me. Did I do something wrong?
Kat was quieter after that, seemingly lost in her thoughts. I wasn’t sure how to handle it. It was making me feel off. I was happy when hair and makeup had finished with me. I couldn’t get out of there fast enough. I made a beeline for my dressing room to get changed into my costume. I didn’t hear from Kat for a while, assuming they had dress rehearsals for the group performances.
While I waited, I texted my assistant and asked him to bring me some brunch to pass the time. It was a little early for lunch, but I was already starving. A few minutes after he dropped off the food, I got a text from Kat, asking where I was.
Me: In my dressing room. I have 🌯🌯🌯. (three burrito emojis)
It wasn’t even a full minute before there was a knock on the door.
“Come in.” I managed to garble out through a mouth full of steak goodness. Kat pushed the door open, standing there with a disapproving look and her hands on her hips.
“You're hiding away to eat burritos? Really?”
My ability to speak left me as soon as I laid eyes on her. The only response I could muster was to hold out the extra burrito I had gotten for her. She looked fucking amazing in her costume. The hem was asymmetrical, showing off her toned legs. The shorter side revealed her entire right thigh. The front was lower cut than I had expected, showing the curve of her breast. From the sketches, I knew the back was non-existent. There was only enough of the fringy fabric to cover her ass. They had left her chestnut hair half down this time. The front of it was pinned back leaving the soft curls cascading down around her bare shoulders. The red shade of the dress, if you could even call it that, looked amazing against her golden skin and made her red lips pop. All of the exposed flesh definitely had little Bravo’s attention. It took everything in me to refocus my thoughts and get him under control.
She raised a questioning brow at me, a smirk forming on her lips as she took the burrito, “You OK, Bravo?”
I nodded as I swallowed down the food I had been chewing even though I wasn’t ready, nearly getting choked in the process. I coughed uncontrollably for a moment, then reached for my drink. I ended up dropping burrito juices on the robe I had put on over my costume.
Kat laughed, “Good thing you put the robe on. I wouldn’t want to explain that mess to the costumers or producers.”
After taking a long drink through the straw, I managed to get myself together enough to respond, “No kidding. I have an extra one hanging over there if you wanna use it while you eat. I know these are messy.”
“Why yes, I think I will. Thank you.”
Whatever had been bothering her earlier seemed to have passed. She was back to her normal smiley self as we rushed through our meal. It helped me feel a little more at ease and out of my head. Once I was finished with my burrito, I pulled the robe off, checking to make sure I hadn’t gotten anything on the costume. I turned to ask Kat if she saw any evidence left behind. I didn’t miss how her eyes looked me up and down before focusing on my shirt.
I couldn’t help teasing her, “You see something you like, Kit Kat?”
She narrowed her eyes at me, “I was just getting a look at your costume. I hadn’t seen it on you yet.”
I stood back, pulled the blazer open, and did a little spin for her, “You like?”
“Oddly enough…yes. The 70’s vibe suits you. I can’t believe you have it buttoned all the way up though. I was beginning to think you had a button allergy.”
I gave her a cocky grin, “If you wanna see a little more skin, just ask honey. I guess I probably should show a little more, in solidarity with you.”
She rolled her eyes before taking her last bite. I turned to the mirror and undid the top few buttons. I could see her watching me in the reflection, shaking her head with a smirk on her face. A few minutes later, we headed toward the ballroom for our final dress rehearsal. As we stood on the outer perimeter of the dance floor, Alec and Lana came to stand behind us to wait their turn. Kat seemed to be ignoring them, which was surprising. I couldn’t help glancing over at Alec. My mouth seemed to have a mind of its own as I took in his appearance.
“It looks like hair and makeup did a knockout job on you today, Alec. Can’t even tell that your face is fucked up.”
Kat snorted next to me, covering her mouth with her hand to hold back the laugh. I was surprised to see that Lana also had a hint of a smile on her lips.
Alec sneered, “Don’t get too excited, Bravo. You didn’t hit me that hard…nothing is broken.”
I gave him a toothy smile, “Nothing but your pride, right?”
“Fuck you, Bravo.”
Kat turned to me, placing her hand on my chest, “That’s enough, you two. Shut up or I’ll throat punch both of you.”
I was still smiling when I muttered a quick “sorry” her way.
She gave me a playful wink that Alec couldn’t see before looping her arm with mine, forcing me to turn away from him. We were called to go through our routine soon after that. We nailed it the first time through. The lightning, music, and camera angles fell into place perfectly for us. We went through it two more times just to be sure.
I don’t really know what came over me, I assumed it was because Alec was glaring at me the entire time, but I made sure to turn the flirtiness of our routine up a few notches. Kat didn’t seem to mind, meeting me where I was. Not that it was all an act. The way the fringy dress accentuated her hip movements really did almost have me on my knees. The woman’s body moved in ways that my brain could not handle.
I have to admit, I was getting a small thrill out of knowing Alec was seeing how good Kat and I were together. I didn’t want to make things harder on her, but he really did need to be put in his place. He needed to know that Kat was desirable.
I could feel the static crackling in the air between me and Kat as we walked off the dance floor, hand in hand. She had that look in her eyes again while we waited for final feedback. We were given the all clear to head to our final fitting after that. Kat kept hold of my hand the entire time. Only dropping it as soon as we ran into Stacia and Joe in the hallway. We moved to walk around them, but Stacia stopped us. I noticed she looked both of us over before she spoke to Kat, “Care to share what happened to Alec’s face?”
Kat’s eyes widened slightly, “What did Alec say happened to his face?”
Stacia’s eyes narrowed, “He didn’t…just said he’s clumsy.”
I worked to keep my face neutral, but I really wanted to laugh at the absurdity of everything.
Kat gave her a tight lipped smile, “Well, I won’t argue with that. He is clumsy.”
“So, you’re not gonna spill the details?” Stacia prodded.
“I’m afraid I don’t know the details. He was fine the last time I saw him…so I can’t help you there.”
I could tell by the way Stacia was looking at Kat that she didn’t believe her. It was almost like they were having some sort of standoff now, eyes locked in an intense gaze. Stacia’s eyes finally shifted over to me, her head tilting slightly. “How about you, Dieter? Do you know what happened to his face?”
I shrugged, “What makes you think I would know anything? I hardly see the guy.”
Stacia studied my face for a moment, almost like she was trying to read if I was lying. Her lips eventually turned upward into a smirk, “Well, good luck you two. Your dress rehearsal looked perfect. You’ve really turned up the heat this week. I’m sure the viewers are gonna love it.”
Joe stood by smiling like the Cheshire Cat through this entire interaction. Only mumbling a quiet “Good luck” as they walked away. Kat and I gave each other wide-eyed looks as we turned to head toward the wardrobe department for our final fitting. Once the fitting was done, we stopped in for hair and makeup touch ups. Kat had to go change for the opening performance while I went to the staging area to wait.
Since I skipped out on watching the group dress rehearsals, this was my first time seeing it. I remembered Stacia saying that they were going to put more attention on Kat, but I didn’t realize how much. She was the performance. Everyone else might as well have been background dancers. She worked the room and the cameras like no other and had the audience going crazy. She was magnetic and I couldn’t take my eyes off of her.
I lost interest once she was off the dance floor, opting to scroll through social media on my phone instead. I went down a rabbit hole of hashtags for the show, curious what people were saying. Kat was indeed a hot topic, and it was mostly positive. They fucking loved her and that made me happier than it probably should have. I definitely felt like Stacia was getting a heavy dose of karma after insinuating that Kat wasn’t that good in the beginning.
I eventually came across a Dieter and Kat hashtag. I thought twice about clicking it but did so anyway. There were apparently a lot of shippers for us out there. It now made more sense why Stacia and Joe were pushing that narrative. I was honestly surprised at the support for it. Usually, my fans flipped the fuck out anytime I was linked to any sort of serious romantic partner, but they seemed ok with this. I saw Kat coming in my periphery, so I hit the hashtag ‘follow’ button then locked my phone just as she made it over to me.
We were buzzing with anticipation as we awaited our turn. Kat hooked up her earbuds to her phone, “You ready for some hype music?”
I nodded, “What’s it gonna be today? Eye of the Tiger?”
She chuckled, “Oh no. I only pull out the big guns when it’s serious.”
She handed me one bud and my ear was immediately filled with the familiar guitar riffs of Walk this Way by Aerosmith and Run DMC. “Yaaaaaas! I approve!” I said with a wide grin. She laughed, bobbing her head to the beat while my fingers played the chords on my air guitar. It was exactly what we needed to get hyped up.
Before we knew it, it was our turn. I was strangely calm as we stepped out onto the dance floor and took our places. Kat’s confidence and sparkling eyes seemed to keep me grounded in the moment as the spotlight dropped down on her. I stood off to the side in the darkness, waiting until it was time to join her. She opened with the flirty strut and hip shaking thing she does so effortlessly before I came into the light, playing the lovesick puppy matching her every move while she shimmed and gyrated around me. There were a couple of instances where there was no space between us as our bodies moved as one to the beat. Kat’s cheek rested against mine, our fronts pressed together, our bodies twisting downward before popping back up for me to dip her backwards. She pushed me away dramatically before we transitioned into a lock step sequence followed by cross over breaks and a chase with full turns. We ended with a flourish as I spun Kat around and dipped her backward again, this time pulling her leg upward into our ending pose.
When the lights dimmed, I pulled Kat upward and hugged her against me as she bounced up and down. Her arms wrapped around my neck as her cheek pressed firmly against mine. “I swear, that was fucking perfect. We killed it,” she said loud enough for me to hear it. I could feel her hot breath against my ear as she spoke. I couldn’t help burying my face in her neck for a brief moment. I inhaled her scent quickly, it was sweet like berries and a spring day. I didn’t want to let go, but I had to. The producers were finally getting what they wanted, our whole interaction since stepping foot on the dance floor was over the top flirty and sexy. More so than it had been during rehearsals as we continued matching each other’s energy, not holding anything back. If the connection between us continued to grow like this every week, it was only a matter of time before something happened between us. Having this much chemistry was unsustainable in its current form.
While I did my interview and waited for the scores, Kat stood hugging me around the middle with both arms. I wrapped one of mine around her and pulled her tightly into my side.
The judges didn’t really have any feedback for us. They mostly gushed about the sexiness of the performance and how in sync we were with each other. Noting that we probably had a stronger connection than any other couple on the show this season. My head was spinning from the adrenaline of it all before we even got our scores. My knees felt like they were going to give out as they started calling out the numbers. They gave us two 8’s and two 9’s. Kat and I were both in shock as we stood with our mouths agape. She had to give me a little shake to bring me back down to earth as the host asked how I was feeling about having the highest score of the night.
Afterwards, we walked back to the staging area with smiles on our faces. Several cast members congratulated us as we passed by. We found a spot in the back corner, away from the others. Kat pulled me in for another hug, “That is the highest score I have ever gotten. I think I’m in shock.”
I chuckled, “I know, I’m in shock. That was…wow. I have no words.”
“We should celebrate with a big greasy burger after this,” she said with a toothy grin.
I nodded, my hand still resting on Kat’s hip after she pulled away from the hug. Her hand sat on the back of my shoulder as she leaned into my side. We stayed like that while watching the next couple’s performance. The energy was still buzzing between us when we were interrupted by Alec. I noticed his eyes drop down to where my hand was on Kat, anger briefly flashed across his face, but he managed to compose himself.
“Kat, can we talk for a minute?” he finally asked.
Her lips set into a tight line before she finally nodded and pulled away from me. He’s not really gonna do this now, is he?
They moved further away into the back corner, but I could still hear him begging her for another chance. I rolled my eyes, trying not to listen, but I honestly couldn’t help it.
“Baby, please, I swear. I’m not gonna fuck up again. I’m really gonna try to do better. I went to an AA meeting yesterday. I haven’t drank at all since that night. I feel terrible and I realize I can’t keep acting like this. I’ll do whatever you want. I’m still going to anger management, I’ll do therapy too if that’s what you really want. Please, I’ll do anything.”
I chanced a glance in their direction, Kat looked like her resolve was breaking. Fucking asshole. He was saying all the right things and I bet he didn’t mean a word of it.
“Alec, I can’t keep doing this.”
“I know baby, I don’t blame you. Just one more chance, please.”
Kat sighed, “OK. This is the LAST time though. You fuck up again and I’m done. It’s on you. You hear me?”
I didn’t even hear Alec’s response. I felt like the air had been knocked out of me. I had gotten my hopes up - let my fantasies of her being mine run wild and infect my senses. I felt dizzy for a different reason now, realizing my breathing was turning shallow.
My attention was drawn back to Kat when I heard my name.
“You need to get over whatever your issue is with Dieter. He’s done nothing wrong and doesn’t deserve to be treated like this. I’m not gonna put up with it. I want you to apologize for trying to hit him. That was on you.”
I don’t want his fucking apology.
“I’ll do whatever you want, just let me come home with you tonight. Please? So, we can talk, and I can show you how sorry I am. Let me make it up to you.”
She puffed air through her cheeks before nodding, “Fine. Whatever.”
I felt sick. I needed to leave. It felt like the walls were closing in on me and everything was suddenly too loud. Sweat was beading at the nape of my neck and running down my back. I felt like I was gonna have a fucking panic attack.
I turned to leave, nearly bumping into Kat who was now holding Alec’s hand at her side. I just stared at them wide-eyed. I could see the concern on Kat’s face, but I didn’t care.
“Dieter man, listen…I’m sor…” Alec started to say.
“Save it. I don’t want your fucking apology.”
I glanced down at Kat, “Enjoy your evening. I’m not feeling well, I need to go.”
I could hear Kat calling after me as I left the staging area and moved toward my dressing room. I quickly changed out of my costume and stuffed it into the dry cleaning bag, sitting it outside my door for pickup. I closed the door behind me and locked it. I sat down in the chair, my head in my hands as I fought to control my breathing. The tears pooled in my eyes as I tried to reason through why I was reacting like this. It wasn’t normal. The hurt was too much.
I was startled from my thoughts by a loud knock on the door.
“Dieter, are you in there?” It was Kat. I didn’t answer her.
My phone buzzed with several incoming text messages. They were from her, but I didn’t bother to look at them. I couldn’t.
I exhaled slowly, running my hands down my face. What is my fucking problem? It was then that the realization finally hit me. I was in love with her. “Fuck.”
Next: Week 4
A/N: Y'all ready to come at me with pitchforks? Don't worry, it won't last long. Alec is a class A fuck up. You know it's only a matter of time.
So, there was a lot that went down in this chapter. Now that you've read Dieter's side, who do you think is down worse, Dieter or Kat?
There was a lot of flirty banter in this chapter and I am here for it. Do we think Kat was intentionally flirting? What do we think about them singing together? I can confirm, this will not be the only time that happens...
We got a small glimpse of plant dad and cat dad Dieter in this part. Are we swooning yet?
How much did we love Dieter being a smart ass to Alec during dress rehearsals? I feel like we need more snarky Dieter.
What about Dieter's revelation at the end? How do you think that is going to affect his interactions with Kat going forward?
Now for some fun stuff... a big shout out to @readingiskeepingmegoing for introducing me to one of the music artist featured in this chapter. I. AM. OBSESSED. The three songs referenced in this chapter are linked below as well as their performance song. I have also included another fun Cha Cha video that I took inspo from.
youtube
CP Taglist: @secretelephanttattoo @titlee78 @maggiemayhemnj @legendary-pink-dot @morallyinept
@survivingandenduring @wannab-urs @harriedandharassed @hisandsnakes @misstokyo7love
@readingiskeepingmegoing @runningmom94 @sin-djarin @cakipy-blog @missladym1981
@guelyury @weho2kcmo @alokaerza @girlofchaos @trulybetty
@rhoorl @bitchwitch1981 @madnessofadaydreamer @darkheartgatita @jazzloveslatte
@timpletance @musings-of-a-rose @samiamproductions @myloveistoolittle @for-a-longlongtime
@copperhalfcent @auteurdelabre @drewharrisonwriter @burntheedges @stevie75
@bunniboo0015 @quicax3 jackie923 @sherala007 @pastelnap @pedrostories
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👉 If your name is marked out, it wouldn’t let me tag you. ☹️
If you would like to be added to the tag list, let me know in the comments or shoot me a DM.
Credits:
Support/MDNI Dividers: @cafekitsune
Disco Divider: @deadbranch
#dieter bravo#dieter bravo fic#pedro pascal#pedro pascal characters#pedro pascal fanfic#dancing dieter#cat dad dieter#plant dad dieter#soft dieter#dieter bravo fluff#dieter bravo x ofc#closed position series#Spotify
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The Breakfast Club - Eddie Munson X Fem!Cheerleader!Reader
Part Four - Hand Over The Purse
Summary - The kids get high and share a little more about themselves. Some more than they probably wanted to. (A retelling of The Breakfast Club, written and directed by John Hughes).
Warnings - Strong Language / Drug Use / Kleptomania / Abusive Relationship / Dysfunctional Families / Child Abuse / Sexual References / Pyromania and Fire
Word Count - 5.4k
(Series Masterlist) (Masterlist)
(Part One) (Part Two) (Part Three)
~~~~~
Saturday.
October 25th, 1986.
Hawkins High Library.
2:00pm
~~~~~
Eddie sat on the beanbag chair, putting the finishing touches on a joint as long as a dictionary page. You sat down beside him, squeezing to fit on the chair together, and laughed at the size of the joint. He smiled proudly. He licked the blunt all over to ensure that it stayed together, keeping his eyes locked on yours. He held it up to your mouth and blindly fished his lighter out of his pocket, not once taking his eyes off you. You tried not to act nervous, but if you were unconvincing, Eddie didn't say so. You wished he'd say something to ease whatever this tension was between the two of you. The chocolate swirls of his irises were making your mind go blank. He struck the lighter and held it under the end. You closed your eyes to shy away from his attentive stare and moved in on the joint. There was a brief pause, and you were hyperaware of Eddie's presence beside you. With a shuffle of his jacket, you could feel him moving closer to place the blunt to your lips. Eddie couldn't help but stare at you like this. Your eyelashes resting softly above your cheeks, and your lips pouted ever so slightly in such a kissable way.
Eddie smoothly replaced the joint with his lips.
You unknowingly pressed your lips to his and sucked. Your eyes snapped open to see Eddie, lips against your and his eyes delicately closed. Despite all of the alarms ringing in your head, you didn't move away and instead close your eyes again. Eddie smiled against your lips. In reality, the kiss only lasted about five seconds, but it felt like time had come to a stand still. The kiss made your stomach drop. Not necessarily in a bad way. It's kind of like when you hit the first drop of a rollercoaster; terrifying but thrilling all the same. His lips felt like the inside of a rose petal. It was a bit unexpected from a guy like Eddie, but you weren't complaining. Billy's lips were always chapped, and he used far too much teeth and tongue for your liking.
Billy.
You pulled away abruptly.
You swiftly wiped your lips on the back of your hand, praying that Eddie couldn't see how they were shaking and gave him an unamused look. He just laughed at his little prank, loving how flustered he made you. If your mind was blank before, it was the complete opposite now. You were practically drowning in your own thoughts, struggling to keep your head above them all as more and more weighed you down. You thought of Eddie and how much you had come to tolerate him over the course of a few hours. You thought of the kiss, albeit it was barely more than a quick peck, and how much you had actually enjoyed it. Then you thought of Billy. You thought about how he would react if he found out you had kissed Eddie. Had you technically cheated? Eddie kissed you, not the other way around. But you enjoyed it. The fluttering butterflies Eddie had given you quickly turned into a nest of guilty spiders crawling under your skin.
You rolled your eyes and handed out a hand for Eddie to pass you the blunt, not trusting him to give it to you properly this time. You felt like you were more desperate to smoke now than ever, if only to clear your mind. Eddie passed it to you with little defiance over your new found trust issues. You held it to your lips and took a puff. It wasn't so different than smoking a cigarette, which you only did socially, so the initial inhale wasn't so bad. But your eyes closed as you struggled to keep the dope in your lungs. Your cheeks puffed in and out, and you gaged. Your lungs expelled the smoke out, leaving you coughing and choking. Eddie laughed beside you, patting you on the back in an effort to help clear your airways.
"You good, Sweetheart?" He chuckled.
You continued to cough, only holding a thumbs up sarcastically.
Once you had finally collected yourself, you bravely tried again. You went to put the joint to your lips again when Eddie stopped you. You looked at him confused when he took the joint from your hands.
"Let me try something I think would help."
"What are you going to do?" You said cautiously. After that kiss, you weren't sure you liked him being so vague.
"Shotgun."
"Shotgun?"
"You'll see. You just gotta breathe in the smoke, okay?"
This all sounded a bit sketchy to you, but Eddie knew what he was doing.
You hoped.
He took a hit and held it in his mouth. He tenderly placed a hand on the back of your neck, pulling you in closer. Your hand rested on his chest, so you didn't topple on top of him. He lightly pressed his lips onto yours and opened his mouth, exhaling slowly. You caught on quickly, despite the shock of Eddie practically kissing you again, and began to suck the smoke in. It was far easier this time, the smoke feeling far more diluted than when you drew it from the source. Your eyes fluttered closed at the feeling of Eddie's lips brushing against yours, and resisted temptation to lean in and kiss him again. You inhaled as slowly as you could to keep Eddie close for as long as possible, but your lungs were reaching full capacity, and you had to pull away to release the air from them. Eddie looked pleased when you didn't have another coughing fit.
You bravely reached for the blunt and took it from his hands, suddenly feeling the urge to please and impress him. You wrapped your lips around the end of the blunt and inhaled once again. The hit wasn't so bad this time. Now you were more prepared. Your lungs surrendered to the smoke and allowed it to fill them up. You exhaled a lot smoother this time, feeling a little disappointed with the lack of effect the weed seemed to have on you. You didn't feel any different, aside from your heart hammering in your chest. You couldn't decide if that was from the joint, Eddie, or the guilt creeping through your system.
Eddie had an impressed smile on his face. He took the blunt from you and took a hit himself, a lot more expertly than you had. He lay back on the bean bag and blew the smoke upwards towards the ceiling. The movement had you sinking into the chair until you were practically cuddled up into Eddie's side. He placed an arm around your shoulders as he got himself more comfortable.
You shared a few more hits when Robin approached the two of you gingerly. She felt like she was intruding, but she felt in dire need of a smoke. She sat on one of the single sofas beside Eddie and asked to join in. Eddie felt satisfaction that he had been able to influence the others to join him, just out of spite for Steve and Nancy. He wondered if they would join in, too.
He passed the joint to Robin, who took a hit effortlessly. He wasn't as shocked as you were at her mastery of smoking. Eddie knew Robin from band and had managed to convince Robin and a few others to smoke with him and the other guys from Corroded Coffin. It wasn't a common occurrence, but whenever he offered, Robin was always the first to say yes.
"You know, my cousin Si, he's from Canada." Robin rambled. "He got high once, and he started eating like really weird foods, and then he just felt like he didn't belong anywhere. Kinda like 'Twilight Zone', you know?"
You took another hit after her. When you passed the blunt to Eddie, the world was moving frame by frame. Your head began to feel lighter and lighter until you felt like you were floating. Eddie watched you with numbed concern and started laughing. At first, you thought you must have said something funny, but Robin started laughing too. You realised you must have looked completely off your face, and soon, you were laughing too. Your eyes squinted shut with laughter. Coloured patterns moved across the insides of your eyelids. Lots of slowly rotating geometric shapes in multicolours floated in all directions, crossing and colliding with each other. When you opened your eyes again, you stopped acknowledging where you were. You felt like you were high on a cloud with your friends laughing beside you.
~~~~~
2:30pm
~~~~~
You didn't remember when Steve joined in, but he appeared from one of the seclusion rooms without his pants and began running around the library. You all watched in bewilderment as he continued his wild, uninhibited race around the bookshelves. He finished outside of the office he had come out of and went back inside without a word.
Nancy pinched the bridge of her nose at his behaviour. She couldn't believe he had managed to convince himself to smoke weed, despite her pleads not to. She was the only one completely sober. She sat by herself in one of the listening rooms, away from the others but close enough to keep her eye on them. It was a small room with a turntable, speakers, a panel of controls and switches, and racks of records. She fiddled with the record jacket in her hands. She took the record out of the sleeve and placed it on the turn table. The music came out louder than she was expecting, and she scrambled to turn it down. Much to her disappointment, she had managed to alert the others.
Eddie waltzed in, looked around, and began going through the records. The others follow loosely behind, thankfully Steve with his pants on this time. Soon, Nancy's small means of escape felt like an overcrowded borstal.
"What a bunch of shit records." Eddie complained and moved to another row.
Eddie saw a cover that piqued his interest and replaced the record on the turntable. He set down the tonearm, and the record hissed and popped before playing some German folk song. He moved his arms far too enthusiastically for what was playing, mocking some air drums.
"Nice beat."
"That is the worst sound I ever heard." You complained with your hands coving your ears.
"What else is there?" Robin chimed.
"Not much."
Eddie turned back to the racks. He started thumbing through the records again. The others joined in. Eddie pulled out another choice selection and put it on, ripping the old record off the turntable. It was opera. A prima donna started shrieking. Eddie mocked her by singing in a ridiculous, high-pitched voice. You laughed before joining in, then Steve and Robin joined too humorously. Even Nancy had to crack a smile at that.
"Wait! I have something we can listen to." You exclaimed and rushed out of the room once the laughter had died down.
You fished through your bag and came back with Prince's Purple Rain album that you took earlier.
"Where did you get that?" Eddie questioned.
"Took it from the teacher's lounge when Steve and I used the drink machine."
Eddie was impressed by that. He took it from you and put it on the turntable. Prince's 'Let's Go Crazy' played, and his voice drifted from the speakers, "Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to get through this thing called life. Electric word life. It means forever, and that's a mighty long time..."
Eddie turned the volume up as loud as he could without Principal Higgins hearing it, as the drums set in. Everyone, bar Nancy, filtered out of the room to began to dance. Eddie leaned against the doorframe, tapping his foot to the beat as he watched the others. They jumped and swung their arms, rocking to the strumming of the guitar. He took particular interest in you. You were standing in a shaft of sunlight streaming from between the blinds, head bowed as you twirled and pranced on your feet. You were vaguely aware of Eddie watching you. You found yourself concentrating a lot harder to stay on your feet. You spun and swayed your hips, interpreting the music with your body. You glistened with perspiration as you lost yourself to the music and set your inhibitions aside. Eddie's eyes widened as he carefully studied your body, subtly adjusting his pants. He tried not to think about the way you had wiggled out of your turtle neck, leaving yourself in just your cheerleading top and cardigan when you began having a hot flush.
The next song played until completion, and you finished your dance with a sensuous flourish. You look to Eddie, who gave you an applause. Your cardigan was half hanging off your shoulders, exposing the soft flesh of your upper arms, and your skirt had managed to hike itself further up your thigh. You blushed, hoping that you hadn't given Eddie more of a show than you had intended. But it was nothing that he hadn't seen before.
Perv.
The drums tapered off to a slow dance type beat, giving you a chance to catch your breath. You extended a hand out to Eddie. He had been so engrossed in checking you out that it took him a second to realise you were asking him to dance. He smirked and stalked his way over to you, clasping your hand in his. You tried to fight any intimidation as he towered over you. He was at least a whole head taller than you. The two of you stood a few inches away from each other, holding each others hands in front of you as you slowly started swaying to the beat. Eddie tugged on your hands to pull you closer until you collided with his chest. You rested your head there, hearing the rapid beating of his heart as you wrapped your arms around his waist. He embraced you in his, relaxing his cheek on the top of your head. The smell of your shampoo clouded his senses. He could feel the tension shifting from your bones, and you cuddled him closer. You fell in step together, letting the rhythm control your movements. Your entire body was in tingles, like someone had taken your bottle cap off and was filling your body with fizzy soda. The scenery surrounding you dissolved until it was just you and Eddie. He brushed a hand against your cheek, his body acting on his own. You lifted your head, and Eddie guided to look in his eyes. Your hands move to wrap around his neck, pressing your chests together, giving him no choice but to become one with you. You were in pure paradise. Your fingers played with the stray strands at the nape of his neck that had fallen out of his loose bun. In that moment, you were completely his.
You felt like there was a hole in your heart being filled. You never had this with Billy. He was too forward and fast-paced. He didn't take the time to love you, to appreciate you. Instead, his version of proving his love to you was by not starting a row. The only time you felt like you were in a normal relationship was when he wasn't yelling at you. But recently those times proved less and less. You hid your face in Eddie's shoulder to conceal your teary eyes.
You blinked your tears away when he nudged you with his nose. You looked at him again, his eyes swimming in concern.
"You good?"
You nodded, giving him a pitiful smile. He didn't believe you, but he thought it best not to press. He took a deep breath and pulled you into a much needed hug. You found it hard to believe that Eddie had this side to him. His walls were always up so high, but maybe you were enough to trigger the cracks to bring them down.
Just as they started to crumble, the song came to an end. The two of you tensed, suddenly aware of how close you were. Eddie cleared his throat and took a step back. You felt cold. The others sat on the beanbag chairs, watching you with raised eyebrows and smirks on their lips. You could feel yourself flushing but moved to join them. Eddie followed behind with an exaggerated swagger, as if nothing had happened. You all sat in a loose circle, stoned and relaxed. They included you and Eddie in their conversation.
"So, you got a middle name?" Nancy asked you. It seemed that, after being together for about six hours, they finally decided to get to know one another.
You gave her a sly, I'll-never-tell look.
"I'll bet you can't guess my middle name." Eddie said cheerily, wanting to play along.
"Wait, so your real name isn't Eddie 'The Freak' Munson." Steve faked surprise.
Eddie sent him a glare, about to open his mouth before Robin jumped in. "It's Waylon."
"Your birthday's October 31st, you weigh 178 pounds, you're five feet, eleven inches, and your social security number's 027-03-8619."
Everybody looked at her as much for her entering the conversation as for her correct guess. Eddie was completely stunned.
"Are you a psychic?" Steve gasped.
She rolled her eyes with a shake of her head.
"Then do you want to tell me how you know all of this about me?" Eddie didn't seem as impressed as the others.
Eddie wasn't one to tell his personal information to a bunch of strangers. He had spent a lot of time carefully engineering the walls he built around him. He was aggrieved to find that he had managed to slip up. You saw shoulders tense, and you knew that the wall you had managed to break into was building itself back up.
"I stole your wallet, dingus. While you were slow dancing with your 'Sweetheart'."
Eddie slapped his pockets. Sure enough, his wallet was missing.
"Give it, thief!"
Robin chuckled, taking his wallet out of her pocket. She chucked it to Eddie, who quickly opened it and checked through to see if anything was missing.
"Give me a break. What's there to steal? A couple of bucks and a beaver shot."
"A what?"
"He's got a nudie picture in there, I saw it."
"Let's see." Steve reached out, but Eddie pulled it back.
"I want to see Eddie's wallet." You suddenly felt jealous. Who was this nude woman? Did he know her? Was it his girlfriend? Would Eddie keep a nudie picture of you in his wallet?
"Hand over the purse." Eddie countered.
You paused as you quickly tried to remember if there was anything embarrassing in your purse. Eddie dug his wallet back out. You reached for your bag. You held them out for each other. Eddie yanked the purse from you at the same time you took his wallet. Steve offered his wallet to Robin in exchange for her bag and then exchanged Robin's bag for Nancy's purse.
Steve opened Nancy's purse carefully, as if it held a treasure. He pulled out makeup container after makeup container, eyeliner tubes, lipstick tubes, gloss pots, tiny jars, brushes, pencils, combs, hairbrushes - a ridiculous amount of stuff. You fished through Eddie's wallet. You took out his license, his social security card, and a Mastercard.
You studied the Mastercard. "Who's Myron Lee Fong?"
Eddie pulled out your Walkman and tangled headphones from your bag, studying the tapes you carried with you. He was surprised by your mixed taste in music; Madonna, Beastie Boys, Michael Jackson, Journey, and David Bowie.
"Got me." He shrugged, trying to refrain himself from unwinding your tapes.
"Is this a stolen card?"
"No, it's a found-in-the-parking-lot card."
"Isn't it illegal?"
"Only if I use it." He winked.
"What do you have it for if you don't use it?"
"Status."
His answer confused you. You would have asked him what he meant, but with his lack of response to your questions, you didn't think you were going to get much of an explanation.
"This is the worst fake ID I've ever seen. Do you realise you made yourself 68?" Nancy giggled as she searched through Robin's bag.
She passed the fake ID around, and everyone chuckled at it.
"That was supposed to be the year I was born." Robin sighed, snatching it back, not enjoying everyone laughing at her, even if she had found it funny herself. "I goofed it."
"What do you need a fake ID for?"
She looked at you like it was obvious. "So I can vote."
Everyone shared a laugh. Nancy dumped the rest of Robin's bag in front of her on the floor; traveller's checks, a birth certificate, socks, a baggie of underwear, spare t-shirt, toothbrush and toothpaste, a tiny Teddy bear and a scad of tampons.
"You always carry this much shit in your bag?" Eddie picked up a tampon, examining it as if he was debating whether or not it would fit up his nose.
"Yeah," Robin's demeanour suddenly turned sombre. "You never know when you have to jam."
"Run away?" Nancy asked, eyes big with pity.
"Run away."
"For good?"
"For good. As far as I can get."
"No matter how bad things got, I'd never run away from home. Living with assholes is preferable to living on the street." Steve interjected.
"That's your opinion."
"Are you gonna be like a shopping bag lady? You know, like, sit in alleyways and like talk to buildings and wear men's shoes and that kinda thing?" Eddie asked.
You gave him a nudge. He obviously wasn't reading the room. It wouldn't be the first time. Any moment you were expecting Robin to tell some big secret about herself, or even just break down crying. Eddie wasn't exactly making things any easier for her.
"I'll do what I have to."
"Why do you have to do anything?" Your question was more of an encouragement, letting her know that she was in a safe place. There was no judgement coming from you.
You had thought about running away before, every kid probably had at some point, but you knew that you wouldn't ever actually do it. Robin, however, was primed and ready to go at any second. The thought made you sad, and you remembered how she had looked when you first walked into the library this morning; red eyed and sniffle nosed. You wondered what had happened to her.
Robin turned to Steve. They shared a look. Something told you that Steve already knew what was up with Robin and why she wanted to run away. But how? They were the most unlikely duo ever. Surely Robin didn't know Steve well enough to open up to him.
"I don't think my parents accept me for who I am."
"You'd subject yourself to the violent dangers of the street because your parents don't accept you?" Eddie scoffed. "Welcome to the fucking club."
"Rob, everybody's home life is unsatisfying." You continued as if Eddie hadn't spoken, trying to reason with Robin. "If it wasn't, people'd live with their parents forever."
"No Sweetheart, I think hers is beyond what people like us think is unsatisfying."
Robin shifts in her seat, clearly uncomfortable with all of the attention to her problem. "Never mind. Everything's cool."
"What's the deal?"
"There's no deal, dingus. Forget it. There's no problem." Robin didn't want to talk about it anymore. "What do you care? Leave me alone."
"You're carrying all that crap in your purse. Either you really want to run away or you want people to think you really want to run away."
"Eddie!" You gasped. You couldn't understand why he was having such a big reaction to what Robin had said.
"Eat shit!" Robin threw Steve's wallet to the ground and stormed off.
Steve picked up his wallet. He didn't look offended that she had thrown it, he just made sure that everything was still in there before looking longingly at Robin. You could see the gears turning in his head as he debated whether or not to go after her. He rose from his seat, but Nancy held onto his arm, shaking her head.
"I think it would be best just to let her cool off."
You turned to Eddie, a confusing mix of fury and sympathy churning in your stomach. "You shouldn't've said that."
"Whatever, Buckley's got a fucking stick up her ass."
"Go apologise to her."
Everyone stilled, turning to you with wide eyes, shocked that you had the balls to boss Eddie around. You felt yourself buckle slightly under Eddie's stare, but held your ground.
"Excuse me?"
"You heard me, Eddie. You should go and apologise to her." You looked up at him with big puppy dog eyes. "Please."
Fuck.
Eddie shifted under your gaze. He was torn between keeping his stance and yielding to your orders. Something about you looking up at him like that did something for him. He tried his best not to, but he couldn't help but think about you looking like that on your knees for him. He shook the thought from his head before he conjured up too many salacious details. With a deep exhale through his nose, he reluctantly stood and made his way over to Robin. The others watched with open mouths. Nobody tells Eddie what to do, much less Eddie doing what he's told.
He reused to admit he had some sort of soft spot for you, instead he decided that he was doing this because he wanted to. He knew Robin. She was one of the few who actually treated him like a human being. He walked into the seclusion room to see Robin sat at the table with her head in her arms.
"Hey, Buckley, can we talk?"
She lifted her head from the desk, eyes red and blurred with tears. Her lip curled angrily. "There's nothing to talk about."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah!"
Eddie shook his head in offence. "Okay, fine. Do what you want. Sorry to disturb your self wallowing."
He turned to join the others. Robin watched as he started back towards the door and a realisation flooded her. She didn't want him to go. She just doesn't know how to accept help.
"Wait!"
Eddie stopped abruptly and did a 180 back to her. She struggled to meet his eyes. Her mouth bobbed open like a fish as she raked her brain for the words to say. Help me. Listen to me. Say something so I don't have to. For once in her life, chronic rambler Robin Buckley had nothing to say.
Eddie moved towards her carefully like he was walking towards a lion rather than a sad teenage girl. He calmly sat in the seat opposite her, fiddling with the rings on his fingers awkwardly as he waited for her to speak.
"So what is it?" Eddie couldn't wait any longer. "What's wrong?"
There was some sympathy there, but to her, he didn't really sound like he was too concerned. But he was willing to listen and support and that was enough for Robin.
She lowered her head. She wanted to let it all out, but she just didn't know how to present it. Eddie could see she was struggling. He couldn't stop the pity swirling in his gut.
"Is it bad?" He offered.
Robin nodded sadly.
Eddie grimaced expecting something horrible. He suggests the worst to get it over with. "Child abuse?"
Robin nodded again.
"What do they do to you?" Eddie braced himself for a horror story.
"They ignore me."
Eddie stared at her, too startled to say anything helpful.
His sympathy seemed to melt away at her confession, replaced by incredulity. That's it? He thought to himself. The shit he put up with from his parents, he wished that they had ignored him. He opened his mouth to rant and rave about how bad his life was, but he paused when he finally met his eye. This wasn't about Eddie. Right now, this was about Robin. She was brave to confess something like that. Heck, Eddie hadn't even managed to work up the courage to express any of his true feelings.
"I'm sorry that you have to go through that, Rob."
What else could he have said? He had never been ignored a day in his life, always being yelled at or heckled, or punched, or kicked. He couldn't tell her that everything was going to be okay because he didn't know if it would be. He had never been in that situation before to tell her. But apparently that was all he needed to say.
She gave him a weak smile and wiped her eyes on her jumper sleeve with an appreciative nod. "Thank you."
He fidgeted a bit and tried to alleviate the awkwardness. He looked back and forth between Robin and the door, itching for the lighter in his pocket. He wished he could do more to comfort her, but the silence was eating him alive.
"You don't have to stay, dingus."
He hid his relief and with a quiet 'I'll leave you to it' he headed back to the others.
You and Nancy were sat chatting while Steve fiddled with one of Robins tampons. He looked carefully to see if the girls were watching him, then he peeled the wrapper off and examined the contents. He checked it out very carefully. An idea occurred to him. He put the tube to his lips and blew. The tampon fired from the tube and halfway across the room.
Eddie caught a glimpse of your conversation before you noticed he was there.
"But do you like him?" Nancy whispered.
"I don't want to."
"But do you?"
You sighed, fighting a smile. "I do."
Steve's exclamation had startled you and successfully drew your conversation to a conclusion. Eddie's ears had perked up while his heart deflated. There was someone you liked. Someone that most definitely couldn't be him. Why would you like him? He's been nothing but an ass to you for the past seven hours. And even though it was his own fault, Eddie couldn't help feeling disheartened by that.
"How is she?" Steve asked before Eddie could think any more of it.
He took a seat beside Steve. You had to resist a frown when he did. He had practically been glued to your side all day, what was different now? You shuffled awkwardly, moving to fill the empty space you had left for him.
"She'll be fine." Eddie brushed him off spitefully, pulling his knees to his chest and crossing his arms, pouting like a toddler who hadn't got what they wanted.
"What's up with you, face-ache?"
"Piss off."
He stood up harshly, stomping his feet as he walked back to his seat at the desk. But not your desk, where he had been sat all day, the desk he had originally sat behind you. He put his feet up on the desk, ripped his lighter and the few pencils he had stolen this morning out of his pocket and began to try and burn them.
You all shared a confused stare, when Robin caught your eye. She walked out of the seclusion room, her eyes red from crying as she wiped her nose on a tissue from her pocket. She sat back down with you all and shared a smile as if nothing had happened.
"What did you say to him?" You asked, wanting answers about Eddie's sudden change in behaviour.
"Nothing. He did most of the talking actually." She shied.
"Then what's up with him?"
"No idea, he seemed fine when he left."
That was the truth, but upon over hearing your most recent confession, Eddie's heart had turned stone. The small hopeful part of him, a part of him he didn't even know existed, had thought that maybe he had a chance with you. He was proud of himself for finally growing on you, but perhaps it was more of a spread - a disease like some kind of fungus that you wanted rid of. Why would you, Cheerleading Captain, like someone like Eddie. You were on two completely different levels, way out of his league. You hung out with Jason Carver and Carol Perkins, Tommy H and Chrissy Cunningham. He hated those guys. But why were you so different?
He hadn't realised until hearing how you liked someone else, just how much he actually liked you.
Maybe more.
~~~~~
<<<Previous // Next>>>
~~~~~
Taglist: @cruwushes @the-ch0sen-on3 @namelesshumanperson @ali-r3n @cadence73 @munsonssweets @ahoyyharrington @mewchiili @yourdailymemedelivery @httpsunflowers @b-irock @coolglittercornbae @sav12321 @cumslutforaemond @siriuslysmoking @learninglinesintherainn @peaches-roses-sins @lodeddiperrodrick @catherinnn @lilocapoca @minniedreamers @melaninjhs @chaosfrogsonfire @levylovegood @bowsforsienna @rcailleachcola @spookysace24
#eddie munson#eddie munson imagine#eddie munson smut#eddie stranger things#eddie munson x reader#eddie munson x female reader#eddie munson series#mini series#cheerleader!reader#eddie munson x cheerleader!reader#stranger things#steve harrington#nancy wheeler#robin buckley#the breakfast club#the breakfast club mini series#the breakfast club fanfic#stranger things x the breakfast club#enemies to lovers
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Wait
Feyd Rautha x Y/N - drabble part 3 - 3.4K WC NSFW 18+
Part 1
Part 2
Part 3 (you are here!)
Masterlist
Warnings: SMUT, like gah damn, Feyd being sweet and soft but only for you because fuck everyone else, the Baron being a creep, Reverend Mother - ness, using the voice, blood, virginity loss (its a social construct but whatever), consent king, aftercare, scheming, plotting, play fighting to show who's boss, bad ass reader, honest to god - this is a GOOD one
------------------------------
You watched as the servants removed the bodies of Feyd’s darlings. They seemed so unbothered, you realized this was probably not the first time they had cleaned up bodies. Your regular maids tried not to watch as they dressed you, keeping their heads low.
“Wait,” you said to the maid removing the blade brought to the ambush from last night.
Feyd leaned against the doorway, watching.
“Wait.” you said a bit louder as she moved to leave your apartments.
“STOP.” you said using the voice.
The woman stopped dead in her tracks, eyes going wide as she stood still.
“BRING ME THE KNIFE.” you commanded. Your maids moved away from you so the woman could bring you the blade. You felt the cold steel in your palm before your spoke again, “LEAVE US, ALL OF YOU.”
The door shut quickly and when your eyes met Feyd’s you couldn’t help but comment on his smug appearance.
“What?” you asked him innocently, tilting your head slightly.
“You’re taking to our ways already. Power suits you, Na-Baroness.” he said as he approached you slowly, picking up your free hand to kiss your knuckles.
He kissed them softly before you saw his eyes flit to the long knife in your opposite hand. You watched him start to shift his stance slightly. Everything slowed down as you gave him a cheeky smile. He yanked you towards him by the hand he was still holding onto. You ducked down, his grip holding your wrist. You elbowed him in the back of the knee, as he fell you ripped your arm from his grasp. He threw his arm out at you again, attempting to get ahold of you. The force from ripping your arm away threw you back, using that to your advantage you threw both your feet into his chest, kicking him back. He fell onto his back. Before he could anticipate another move you climbed on top of him, knees on his biceps.
You flipped the knife around, holding it to his neck, “Yield?” you questioned, breathing heavy with a grin tugging at your lips.
His black teeth were visible between his small panting breaths. You felt his hips shift before you felt one of his legs curl over your shoulder, forcing you to the floor. Now he straddled you, moving to hold one of your arms down you threw the knife, catching it with your opposite. You held the knife to Feyd’s ribs.
“Yield?” you asked again.
“You’re not in a position to be asking me to yield.” he chuckled lowly, “You think I’m afraid of being stabbed?” he chided.
You raised an eyebrow at him, “Don’t test me, husband.”
“Or what, wife?” he responded. You had never seen him so playful. Granted this was a violent situation and most in your position would be absolutely petrified.
Not you though. Fear is the mind killer. “LEAN FORWARD.” you said, the voice making his body lurch. You smacked your head into his, knocking him over. He groaned at the sharp pain before he looked at you. You expected rage to be in his eyes; the formidable Feyd Rautha losing a fight? Never. Yet all you saw was complete adoration, and even a hint of lust. You held the knife under his chin, “Yield?” you asked finally.
His eyes raked over you, you were starting to enjoy seeing him on his knees before you. He nodded before standing. You threw the knife onto the bed before looking at him. You left a small cut on his cheek when you headbutted him, you swiped up the dribble of blood seeping out onto your thumb. Feyd watched your every move. You put your thumb in your mouth, sucking the iron from your digit. His pupils were blown wide, the air in the room felt thick. You felt an unfamiliar warmth ignite in your lower belly, it trickled down to your core. You wanted more of the feeling but weren’t sure how to amplify it, or what even caused it.
Your eyes were lost in each other, locked in, focusing solely on the current moment. Feyd’s hands ghosted over your hips, you moved closer to him. Your breaths mingled, lips a centimeter apart. The door flew open, the Reverend Mother entering with fellow Bene Gesserit sisters following behind her. Feyd’s face instantly grew cold, but you could see it was to save face from the immense annoyance he felt.
“Breed them later,” she said, waving Feyd off. “You have been summoned by The Baron, quickly now.” she said before turning to walk out, expecting you to follow her.
Your eyes shifted to Feyd who was already looking at you with worry etched onto his sharp features. You opened your mouth to speak before he put his finger over his mouth, motioning for you to hush. He walked to you silently, pulling your dress up he attached his Holtzman shield to your upper thigh. You watched as he turned it on, a blue blur shimmering over you slightly before settling. You felt Feyd’s fingertips ghost over your thigh, making your eyes flutter closed and head tilt back. The warmth from earlier back in full force. Oh - he was what made you feel like that. He released your dress, adjusting it back to its rightful place before he squeezed your hand. “Be cautious, trust no one.” he whispered before leaving, glaring at the Reverend Mother as he went.
------------------------------------
You kneeled before the Baron as you entered the Great Hall. You kept your head down and eyes off him, “Baron.”
“I’ve been told you killed three maids.” he said gruffly, smoking his pipe.
“Three maids who tried to kill me.” you responded, rising.
“And how did you manage this?” he chuckled, “Did Feyd do it? You can tell me, he won’t get in trouble. Maids are so easily replaceable.”
“I assure you, I killed them. I was trained in combat by a former member of the Sardaukar.” you said, hands clenching each other tightly.
“And you said her sister was preferable? She seems more than adequate.” he said to the Reverend Mother, blowing out a puff of smoke. “How is married life?”
You bit your tongue, not wanting to dignify him with an answer. “I am doing my very best to please the Na-Baron.” you said.
“My nephew has never been easy to please. He grows bored quickly; and you killed his darlings. What will become of you when he is bored and has no toys?” the Baron laughed.
“We shall see.” you said, jaw clenched, fighting the urge to snap at him. Harkonnen’s are full of fury, but you had learned that patience and planning was the best way to know your enemy. You were always watching, observing. And what you observed now was the Baron, testing you. Seeing which way you would fall, to him or to Feyd. “I live to serve House Harkonnen.” you said, kneeling and holding your arms out, opening yourself up completely. Your head was bowed but you honed your hearing in, listening to the silent exchange between the Reverend Mother and the Baron. This skill was more difficult for you than the voice but you managed.
You listened to their minds echo.
“Use her to control Feyd.” thought the Reverend Mother.
You could feel the Baron’s agreement, “Control Feyd, control the Emperium entirely.”
You kept your face devoid of emotion, your mind clear so Reverend Mother knew nothing of your eavesdropping.
“Rise.” said the Baron.
You gave him a sweet smile, “Might I walk the halls? I have yet to adjust my eyes to the darkness of Geidi Prime, I would like to heighten my sight.” asimple, silly request but one you hoped he would oblige.
“Of course.” said the Baron.
You bowed to him and the Reverend Mother before walking out of the hall. You walked back towards your apartments, wanting to talk to Feyd about what just transpired. When you arrived Feyd was nowhere to be found.
You walked up to your guards, “Where is the Na-Baron?”
“I am unable to say, Na-Baroness.” he said sternly.
“TELL ME.” you snapped at him in the voice.
“He is in the arena, training.” he said, shaking his head after he told you, unsure why he did so given his orders.
“FETCH HIM.” you commanded before walking back into your apartments, listening to the guards hurried steps.
You kicked off your shoes and held your stomach, trying to pace your breathing while in such a tight dress. You clawed at the laces of your corset, letting out a grumble when you failed to even untie the initial string. Once you heard the door slide open you turned around. Your breathing was still erratic but you quickly made your way to him. You looked both ways for prying ears, your guards given to you by the Baron himself stood watch.
“LEAVE US.” you told them before shutting and locking the chamber door.
Feyd’s face was covered with confusion. You pulled him into a tight hug, burying your face in his neck. “That man is evil…” you said to him.
“What?” he responded, pulling you back by your hips.
“The Baron… the Reverend Mother… they want to use me to control you.” you said, looking into his eyes nervously.
“How do you know this?” he asked, tone still gentle, purely inquisitive.
“How do you think?” your voice echoed in his mind, yet your lips remained unmoving. “Feyd… I’m scared… I don’t want to be some political pawn. I… I just want to be…” you said, biting your lip before you could finish your sentence.
“Want to be what?” he said, tucking loose strands of hair behind your ears before his hands came to cradle your face.
You sucked in a sharp breath, “Yours.” you paused, “I am your wife, my loyalties lie with you. Always with you. You are the only person I have on this god forsaken planet. The only person I trust. The only person I want.” your hands held his face, eyes glossy with tears.
He could see it, the genuine nature of everything you just said. Truth be told, he felt the same way. You were the only person he felt anything for, a fire in him burned for you and you alone. You were the only one who could make him vulnerable and soft. He wanted to be that way with you. To be held, cherished, loved. Love. He knew little of it, sex and violence were what fueled him prior to you. Yet here you stood, holding him. Declaring yourself to him, not House Harkonnen. He loved you the minute he saw you, he thought to himself. As if it were fate.
“Feyd… talk to me.” you said, interrupting his train of thought.
“I want you too.” he whispered before connecting your lips.
You melted into him, arms going around his neck to deepen the kiss. You felt none of the panic you felt on your wedding night. You wanted him to touch you, feel you, love you. Your tongues mingled together, you mimicked Feyd’s movements. You nipped at his bottom lip instinctually; he sucked in a breath, separating from you. He licked at the drop of blood falling from his lip.
“Sorry!” you said hurriedly, “I… I’m not really sure what to do.” you could feel your face heating up, thankfully the black sun was eclipsing so the room was shrouded in darkness. Only the red lights in the room cast an ethereal glow.
“What do you want to do?” he asked, thumbs rubbing soothing circles on your hips.
“I want you… show me how.” you said.
Feyd leaned back in, kissing you fervently. You felt his hands slide up your hips to start untying your corset. He pulled the ribbon through the endless holes before you felt it go limp. Your breasts peeked out as your dress slowly started to slip off. You felt his hands run up your waist before he slid his hands up your arms.
“Have you never been touched?” he asked, noticing how even the slightest of touches made you squirm.
You shook your head, “No, never.”
“May I touch you?” he whispered as his lips hovered over your neck.
“You already are.” you said, trying to sound like you were still in control of yourself when in reality your mind was hazy. Your senses felt dialed to 11 as he barely touched you.
“Everywhere. I want to touch you everywhere.” he said, licking your neck quickly before blowing on it, making goosebumps flood over your skin. You shivered slightly, making him smirk.
“Ok.” you breathed out.
“Ok? Tell me to stop if you want to stop. We don’t have to do this, I want you no matter what.” he said in all seriousness, gaze never leaving yours as he asked for your consent.
“I want to… please Feyd, make me feel good.” you said, almost moaning it out. The anticipation of his touch driving you mad.
Feyd wasted no time tugging the rest of your dress down. He ripped the corset away, watching the way the black and red fabric pooled around your hips. He kissed, sucked, licked over the vast expanse of your chest. You held him close, body tingling with every move he made. You let out a small yelp when he took your nipple in his mouth, head falling back when he played with your other breast. He held your thighs before picking you up and carrying you to the bed. He laid you down, legs hanging off the edge. You felt his hands caress your upper body as he kissed his way down. His hands held the last bit of your dress, the fabric was barely being held up by your hips. His eyes flicked to yours, seeking permission. You nodded at him repeatedly. He pulled the dress off, leaving you bare. You felt overly exposed as his eyes wandered over every dip and curve.
You tried to cover yourself, embarrassed. Feyd’s gentle hands grabbed your wrists, pulling them away from you. “Perfection,” he said, “utter perfection.”
“I want to see you too.” you said, hands tugging on the bottom of his shirt. He removed his upper armor and shoes before stopping.
“Come take what you want.” he said, lust completely consuming him. He wanted to see how desperate you were for him, how much you needed him.
You smirked but he didn’t miss the slight tremble in your hands as you pulled his shirt off. Your eyes drank in his pale torso. Muscles rippled over his entire body, you didn’t even realize you were already moving to touch him. You felt over him before needing more like some insatiable beast. Your hands couldn’t move fast enough as you fiddled with his belt, his pants finally loose enough for you to pull down. All that remained was his underwear, you could see a straining bulge in his pants. Feyd pushed you back gently so you were laying with your legs off the bed once more. You rested on your elbows, watching to see what he was doing. He dropped to his knees before you. His hand pushed your legs apart.
“So good… is this all for me?” he asked, his head inching closer to your dripping core.
Before you could answer he attached his mouth you your clit, “Ah, fuck!” you moaned. He ate you out like a man starved. He had one goal in mind, make you cum on his tongue twice before he even considered fucking you. Your body writhed, the pleasure consuming you completely. His strong arms held your hips down, your thighs encasing his head. You felt the heat in your lower belly start to spill over, it flowed in your veins scorching you. Your back arched as he sucked and licked at you incessantly.
“Feyd!” you shrieked, unable to compose yourself as you were overwhelmed with an indescribable feeling of euphoria.
Feyd didn’t slow his movements, he watched your slick coat his fingers before he teased your entrance. Your body trembled as he slowly pumped his two fingers in and out of you. He kept his pace for a moment before speeding up, resuming his sucking on your clit. Your soft mewls and whines were music to his ears. “Come on love, I know you can be a good girl for me and cum.”
He mumbled as he was more focused on sucking your bundle of nerves than talking. You clamped your thighs around his head as you rode his face, milking your orgasm for all it was worth. When you finally loosened your grip on his head he nipped and sucked love bites into your inner thighs before kissing his way up to you. “You alright?” he asked.
“I never want to leave this bed.” you chuckled, caressing his face. You felt his bulge rubbing against your sensitive core slightly. You decided to test out his reactions. You grinded into him, he was painfully hard. He let out a strangled groan. You slipped your hand between your bodies, your hand dipping into his underwear finally gripping him where he wanted you most. You watched his eyes flutter closed. You paced yourself as you tugged him off, watching his face for reactions while listening to the little noises he made. Your thumb rubbed over his slick tip, making him lurch forwards.
“W - wait…” he huffed out.
You let go of him immediately, “Did I do something wrong?”
“The opposite actually…” he said with a breathy laugh. You watched as he pulled his underwear off, you gasped when his cock slapped against his stomach. You watched the black precum leak from his pale pink tip. You took him all in, he was beautiful.
“Do you want to have sex?” he asked, kissing over your chest and neck lazily.
You bucked your hips up to him. He ran his cock through your folds, hitting your clit while coating you in him. You felt him position himself before he looked at you with a worried gaze. “This might hurt,” he said before pushing in slowly.
You expected pain but this felt like you were being torn in half. You felt tears prick at the corner of your eyes, slipping down your face when Feyd finally bottomed out. He held still, eyes finally flitting to your face, he saw your tears. He glanced down, he saw his black seed mixed with your crimson blood. “Do you want to stop?” he asked, feeling guilty for making you hurt even if it’ll bring you pleasure.
“No,” you shook your head, “Keep going.” you said pulling him closer to you so you could hook your legs around his waist.
This position felt much better and as he started moving, you felt the pain ebb into pleasure. Tears kept falling from your eyes but these were tears of joy, of bliss. He couldn’t find where to look, everywhere his eyes landed he saw something more delicious than the last place he looked. He became entranced with your belly, watching the bulge reappear with every thrust. He sped up, his high approaching quickly. You sensed his urgency, rubbing your clit furiously you pushed yourself over the edge. You felt your pussy milking him for everything he was worth, you also felt his hot seed deep inside you. Feyd collapsed on top of you, using the last of his strength to keep himself from crushing you. He shifted to lay next to you. Neither of you said anything for a moment before Feyd stood up and walked into the bathroom. Your heart dropped, was he just using you for sex? He returned before your thoughts could spiral. He wiped your face with the damp cloth before he gently cleaned between your legs, careful not to overstimulate your puffy clit. He wiped his cock before throwing the cloth to the floor. You shimmied backwards, pulling the covers over yourself. Feyd followed suit. You cuddled into him instantly.
“Thank you.” you said sleepily.
“For what?” he asked, massaging your scalp.
“Everything,” you mumbled. He smiled watching you try to fight sleep. “I love you Feyd.”
He halted his movements for a second before curling into you, holding you. “I love you Y/N.” he kissed your head, holding you close. He let the warmth of the moment envelop him. Yep, this was love. Feyd Rautha, the psychotic killer, was deeply in love.
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Naboo's Note:
FUCK THIS IS GOOD - I'm so humble I know lol. Fr tho I spent a hot minute on this and I love it. Thanks for all the love around the Feyd mini series lol, drop some requests for Feyd - I'd love them! Thanks for all the likes, comments, and reblogs! XOXOXOXOXOXOXOX!!!!
Taglist: @landlockedmermaid77 @moonsoulk @aoi-targaryen
#feyd fanfiction#feyd x you#feyd imagine#feyd x reader#feyd rautha#feyd smut#feyd rautha harkonnen#house harkonnen#harkonnen#writing#dune part two#dune 2#dune#dune movie#dune part 2
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Need Some Help Darling? Pt.2
Kwak Jiseok
Summary: Just because Jiseok is a bad guy doesn’t mean he’s necessarily a bad guy. Not to you at least. (non-idol au)
WC:~1k
Warning:none
part 1
photo not mine credits to owner.
After settling inside your house you laid on your bed staring at the ceiling. Why was Jiseok there? Why did he help you? Why did he insist on giving you a ride home? Why did he give you his number to call if you need help? Who is Jiseok?
That’s your biggest question of all. You didn’t really know anything about him. You assume that he is some type of loan shark, but you don’t know exactly what he does. It is safe to say that he is dangerous. He literally held a knife to your throat, but he didn’t hurt you and tonight he helped you. Then again he was also carrying a knife on his hip and he wasn’t afraid to use it. So really, what kind of guy is Jiseok? That question lingered in your mind as you drifted off to sleep.
In the morning you woke up and caught sight of the folded piece of paper on your nightstand. You unfolded the paper and looked at the numbers running across it: Jiseok’s number. You grabbed your phone and opened it up to create a new contact. You typed in the numbers from the paper and saved the contact as “Bad Guy Jiseok”.
Besides the new contact in your phone life seemed to go back to normal. You woke up in the mornings, went to work, came back home, had dinner, relaxed before going to bed. Enjoyed your days off. In fact if it wasn’t for his contact in your phone you may think your encounters with him were merely weird dreams.
It was another normal day. You just got off work and were on your way back home. You are waiting for the cross signal at a crosswalk. The signal turns, giving you the go ahead to cross the street. When you’re about halfway across you hear a blaring horn. A car is speeding right for you and you freeze like a deer in the headlights.
“What is wrong with you? Why would you just stand there when a car is coming right for you?” Someone scolded you. Actually no, you recognized the voice. It was Jiseok’s. Jiseok was holding you by your shoulders, his eyes scanned over your body.
“Jiseok? What are you- what just happened?” you asked, looking around. You were now standing on the other side of the street, but the last thing you remember is hearing the sound of a horn.
“You almost got hit by a car! If it wasn’t for me you’d be dead right now!” He saved you, again.
“Thanks, for saving my life,” you said. Jiseok sighed. It was obvious you were still in shock.
“Look I have other business to attend to, but how about you wait in my car. I’ll drive you home after.” He started to guide you in the direction of his car.
“No, it’s fine Jiseok. I can get home on my own,” you tried to decline.
“You’re still in shock. Just wait in the car. I’ll be quick.” Jiseok opened the car door for you and motioned for you to get in. You took a glance at him before getting into his car. He shut the door behind you.
You spent your time in the car thinking about the incident that just happened. How did Jiseok magically show up again when you needed him? Could it really be a coincidence? He did say he has other business to attend to. Have your lives possibly always overlapped and you never noticed? Your thoughts are broken by the sound of a car door opening. It’s Jiseok climbing into the driver's seat.
“Put your seatbelt on,” he tells you. You reach over and grab the seatbelt then click it into place. Jiseok begins to drive and your eyes fall to his knuckles that are wrapped around the steering wheel. They’re bruised and busted. Your eyes trail from his injured knuckles up his arm and to his face. The corner of his lip near his jaw is bruised too.
“You’re hurt,” you say. Jiseok looks at you for a moment then he looks at his knuckles.
“It’s nothing darling,” he dismissed.
“Doesn’t it hurt?” you questioned. He shook his head.
“I told you it’s nothing. It doesn’t hurt,” he said.
“It looks like it hurts,” you voiced. Jiseok chuckled. He removed one of his hands from the wheel and took hold of one of yours. His action takes you by surprise. Your eyes widen as you look at his hand holding yours.
“If your delicate knuckles got busted it would hurt.” His thumb rubbed over your knuckles. “But my knuckles are far from delicate, so it doesn’t hurt.”
“What do you do Jiseok?” you asked.
“Nothing that concerns you darling.” He let go of your hand, setting his back on the wheel.
“Then why do you help me?” You changed your question.
“Should I have let those guys get you that night or let you get hit by that car?” he prompts.
“No. I’m very grateful for you helping me. I just mean for someone who’s a bad guy, you don’t seem like you’re a bad guy,” you say.
“Oh darling I’m sure there are plenty of people who would argue with you about that,” he said.
“Well you don’t seem like a bad guy to me. I don’t think bad guys would drive someone home, so they get back safe or give someone their number to call if they need help.” Jiseok pulled up at your curb.
“Well you’re not just someone, you’re my darling.” He leaned over closer to you. Your breath hitches. Jiseok smirks as he leans even closer to you, so close you can feel his breath fan against your face. Suddenly you hear the click of your seatbelt and the car door opens.
“Don’t trip on your way in,” he tells you leaning back. You feel your face flush.
“Right…thanks for the ride and saving me,” you stammer out, awkwardly getting out of his car
“Sure thing darling.” He stares at you until you make it inside your house before he drives away.
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“Jiseok?” You say with a quivering voice.
“What is it darling?” Jiseok asked.
“I need help,” you sniffed.
part 1
Taglist: @purplelady85 @gingerjunhan @chewednails @ezlynkisses @mon2sunjinsuver @mxlly143
#xdinary heroes#xdh#xdh imagines#xdh x reader#xdinary heroes imagines#xdinary heroes x reader#xh gaon#xh jiseok#xdh gaon#xdh jiseok#jiseok x reader#gaon x reader#kwak jiseok x reader#kwak jiseok#jiseok#gaon
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THE LION CHRONICLES
Pairings: fatherfigure!Alastor x f!reader, Charlie x bodyguard!reader, Vaggie x reader, situationship!Carmilla Carmine x reader
Summary: The group is hesitant when a certain serpent-like threat returns to the Hotel for the third time to ask for redemption. Y/N begins to accept that Carmilla is the one she's with and grows more comfortable in the relationship.
Warnings: WLW, mentions of sex, aftercare, nostalgia, canon-typical violence, Alastor being Alastor, betrayal
A/N: damn this part sucks so bad in comparison to the others, but I have to keep it going, and the next few parts are gonna get so much saucier >:))
| Part 1 // Part 2 // Part 3 |
˚₊‧ ꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚
˚₊‧ ꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚
“What was up with you last night, corazòn?” Carmilla purred from beside me, soft lips skimming over my shoulder with appreciative pecks. “You didn't want to come over, I got a little worried.”
“It's no big deal, I just had a lot on my mind.” I sighed softly, carding my fingers through her white and black strands of hair.
“Do you want to talk about it?” She asked.
“Not really,” I replied, guilty about keeping her in the dark. As much as our relationship was casual and mainly carnal, I did care about Carmilla, and I wanted to tell her everything about my sisters, my status and Lute, but I always ended up deciding against it. Alastor said it was better for my safety to keep it a secret. “Now's not the time to think about it. Tell me about your day.”
“Ugh, Vox canceled on me today again.” She groaned in frustration, which drew an eye roll from me. Nepotism ran rampant among the Overlords, that was how I'd met Carmilla and all the other Overlords. Months before Alastor's sabbatical, he had asked me to attend meetings with him enough times to get me used to going there. Gradually, he began to skip meetings more often, which resulted in me filling in for him for the last seven years. His one-sided homoerotic rivalry with that bonehead Vox, and incidentally the other Vees, had also been passed on to me. Well, not so much the rivalry itself as the general distaste and animosity for them.
“Again?” I huffed, shifting on my side to face her. I brushed my fingertips along her bare arm, tracing imaginary patterns on her skin.
The gesture made her relax, the annoyance with Vox melting away. “Yeah. But it's just as well, at least we got to make up for last night.”
“Mhm, you're right.” I chuckled, brushing her hair away from her neck to expose the fresh love bites littering her gray skin. The way they bloomed so easily on her pale complexion reminded me of-
No. Enough. I hadn't seen Lute in seventy-seven years, and she either thought me dead, a deserter or a traitor. Even if I could get a chance to see her again, the odds of her wanting me back were far too slim.
Get out of my head, I groan internally. You're in bed naked with another woman. Stop it.
“So, how are the girls?” I cleared my throat, shaking the previous thoughts out of my head.
“Actually, they've been asking about you.” She hummed.
“They have?” Her daughters knew about our little affair, as they had seen me sneaking out multiple times before. Before becoming involved with Carmilla, I'd met Clara and Odette at the meetings, they'd accompany her just as I did Alastor. They seemed quite fond of me, and I found it adorable that Carmilla named them after ballet characters. I wanted to protect all three of them, it finally felt like having a family again, but seeing Lute again…
Ugh, what's the point? I'd never get back to Heaven again. I needed to care about the family I had to protect now, situationship or not.
“Yeah. They said they'll keep you if I will.” She chuckled, gazing at me with something beyond simple care in her eyes. Damn it.
“They really said that?” I laughed softly, endeared.
“Yeah.” She said, nuzzling her nose into my neck. My hand buried itself in her hair, stroking through the silky white and black locks that flopped over her forehead. Carmilla was a single mother and extremely busy. Even if Clara and Odette weren't children, they needed to be maintained. It's not like they had money problems, but if either of them ever wanted to go on their own path, they'd need support in any way they could. The way they had so much faith in me made me feel responsible for them.
I made up my mind. If Carmilla decided to ask me out on a proper date, I'd say yes.
“In fact, I've been thinking-” My ringtone cut her off, which made me curse under my breath and peer over my shoulder to see who was calling. Vaggie. Fuck. She hung up and a message appeared on the screen:
SOS, Pentious is back at the hotel
18:37
“Son of a bitch.” I mumbled, running a hand through the single tuft of golden mane atop my head.
“What- what's going on?” She stuttered, sitting up on her elbows to gaze at me with a little nervousness in her gaze.
“Some buffoon who attacked this morning is back at the hotel. I have to deal with this,” I huffed and sat up, gathering my clothes from the insane spots they had ended up in. “I'll make this up to you, I promise.”
I pulled my purple striped jacket on and buttoned it up, then bent down to plant a long, passionate kiss on her lips, thumb rubbing her cheekbone with care. I smiled at her and pressed another kiss to her forehead, which drew another smile from her. “Bye, cielo.”
“Bye, corazòn. Text me when you're safe.”
I nodded at her and ran a hand through my mane to fix it, then blew her another kiss and walked out the door, running down the stairs and towards the hotel as fast as possible.
˚₊‧ ꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚
I reached the hotel and spotted a flash of gray and yellow walking inside, recognizing it as Pentious, which drew a low growl from my throat. My claws protracted with a small shink noise and I stalked after him without a sound, tail swaying side to side for balance as I prepared to pounce- “Change of plans, he's staying.”
“I'm sorry, what?”
“He says he wants to try redemption.” Vaggie explained with a look of dismay.
“But he attacked us just this morning, how is that not a trick?” I gritted, ears perking up at each of his hisses with great irritation.
“It is, but the point here is to give people second chances,” she sighed, looking at Charlie as she showed him around the hotel. “Just keep your eyes open. Don't leave her side, especially not when he's around.”
“Alright.” I mumbled and followed after them, eyes already supervising his each and every move like a hawk. I let out a silent huff. I couldn't believe that I had to leave Carmilla alone after sex to put up with a nutbag and a golden retriever’s poor judgment.
“What are you booing about? Taco booty call got cut off?” Angel asked sleazily, elbowing me in the side with two arms.
“How many minorities can you offend in a single breath?” I replied with a roll of my eyes, crossing my arms as I followed after Charlie, not drawing my gaze from her and Pentious.
“If that pisses you off, you should watch the Olympics with me.”
I sighed in exasperation and trailed after them, ears twitching atop my head as I listened to their conversation, “-and this is the new wall after you broke the last one, heh, and- oh! This, this is-”
“Babe, you don’t have to show him every detail.”
“Sorry, I’m just so excited to have our first real guest!”
Right. A hissy man child who destroyed one of our walls and came back six hours later to request sanctuary. There’s no way this could end badly.
“What the hell am I then?” Angel asked, offended.
“A spider that lives here rent free.” I replied promptly, tail curling around my leg as I moved my gaze back to Pentious, as ordered.
“Well, you’re an important part of our family here, Angel, but you, um…”
“Constantly make us look bad, sexually harass the staff and have literally never once tried to improve?”
“Correct.” I affirmed, having nothing more to add to the list.
“What they mean is, it’s nice to have someone interested for once.” Charlie rephrased in a misguided attempt to soften Vaggie’s true words. “Over here, we have Nifty!”
“The bad boy is back!” The little lady exclaimed, crawling up Pentious’ upper body and clinging to his shoulders with a creepy whisper, “Never leave me again.”
“Don’t mind her, we’re about eighty percent sure she’s harmless.” I said, coming up behind him and standing over at Charlie’s side, giving him a death glare that ensured that Nifty was harmless, but I sure wasn’t.
“And over here, we have-”
Oh, boy, here we go.
There stood Alastor, with his questionable posture, his signature grin and his hands resting home on his lower back. I rolled my eyes fondly and watched the scene unfold with amusement, as Pentious had ripped his coat earlier today.
“-oh, uh, Alastor, our gracious facility manager! You’ve met our newest guest, Sir Pentious… heh, heh.” Charlie chuckled nervously as Pentious gave an awkward wave.
“Ah, yes, you’re the one that ruined my coat,” said Alastor, drawing another eye roll from me. And so it begins. “I definitely remember you now.”
They're cute when they're about to wet themselves. I cringed while Pentious swallowed thickly and Charlie's expression grew into a concerned one and she scrambled to salvage the situation. “Well, I guess this is a great time for your first lesson-”
She cleared her throat and I smirked, leaning against the railing of the stairs as I observed the princess mediating the two petty, petty men. “-how to apologize. The first step to becoming a better person is to admit when you are wrong. Why don't you give it a try?”
Charlie pushed Pentious forward and Alastor kept staring at him with his scary-ass smile, while the snake man smiled awkwardly and tried his best to apologize. “Yes, um… Mr., um, Radio Demon, sir, please forgive me for attacking you and ruining your very lovely coat… um, here…”
He pulled a chunk of red fabric from his pocket and handed it to Al, obviously thinking it was a good idea. I snickered under my breath and pretended to rub my jaw to cover it up, watching the scene with great amusement. “Oh-ho, not many people have been able to take even this much off me! It must have meant quite a lot to you.”
After putting on a look of faux empathy, he set the fabric on fire, green flames wrapping the material in a tiny blaze as he held it between his red gloved fingertips. I pursed my lips tightly to keep any comments or laughter at bay while the other two stared at the flames with concern.
˚₊‧ ꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚
“Now, with a new resident, I think it's important that we all get to know each other, so we are going to play a little game. Everyone, follow me,” Charlie began, then cleared her throat softly and sang, “My name is Charlie - clap, clap - I like to sing - clap, clap - and when we get to know each other, it's the greatest thing - clap, clap.”
She then pointed at me, who sat beside her, and I stumbled over my words, scrambling in my mind for any good ideas for the improv. “Uh, my name is Y/N - clap, clap - I like to draw - clap, clap - and when I'm in difficult endeavors I try not to use my claws - clap, clap.” I pointed at Pentious with an expectant look, still distrusting of him.
“My name's Sir Pentious - clap, clap - I like to build - clap, clap - and despite my stupid Egg Bois, I think I'm very skilled - clap, clap.” The three of us looked at Angel, the one that was left to play the game.
He boredly looked up from his phone and grumbled, “This is stupid.”
“This is not stupid - clap, clap - it's just the game - clap, clap - Y/N and Sir Pentious did it well, so now please try to do the same - clap, clap.” Charlie sang, hoping to keep this from falling apart. Angel was never particularly interested in redemption itself, maybe it was the free room and food, because, and I quote, crack is expensive.
“I'm too sober for this.” He complained, rubbing his face with one of his hands.
“Well, get used to it and learn how to play,” I began, which Vaggie finished with, “This is gonna be your whole day - clap, clap.”
˚₊‧ ꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚
This was hilarious.
I had to purse my lips to keep from laughing because this is the best thing I've ever seen since Alastor's commercial. Angel was wearing a trench coat and a hat and roleplaying a crack dealer, while Pentious was wearing white and eating a lollipop. Oh, if only I could get this on video.
“Oh, I'm a bad man on the streets who never got enough hugs. Now where's an innocent kid I can sell crack to?” Angel read. My God, the script was garbage, but it's so garbage that it's actually good. “Wow! Who wrote this?”
“It's great, right?” Of course it was Charlie.
“I'm telling you, you're no Homer, but it's really funny.” I snickered, drawing my bottom lip between my teeth and rubbing my jaw to hide the chuckles escaping my mouth. My phone pinged in my pocket and I took it out, seeing the notification from Carmilla. Damn it, I forgot to text her.
Are you alright corazòn?
22:37
Are you safe?
22:37
Hey <3
22:37
Yeah, sorry I forgot to text you earlier
22:38
Everything's fine, it was just a false alarm
22:38
What happened?
22:38
I'll call you later and tell you all about it, okay?
22:38
I have a little thing to finish up right now
22:39
Okay, have fun
22:39
Bye amorcito <3
22:39
Bye <3
22:40
“The only cool thing here is to say no to drugs,” Pentious recited with a proud smile. I still didn't trust him, but at least he seems to be trying. “Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm off to not have sexual intercourse before marriage!”
“Yes! Oh, bravo!” Charlie cheered.
“Nah, no one in Heaven cares about that, anyway.” I said carelessly, which caused Alastor's radio filter to static for a brief moment. Damn it.
“Really?”
“Uh, yeah, think about it. Adam's in charge and he's probably had sex with half womankind.” I replied, my heart and stomach deflating with relief at my last ditch salvation. I couldn't believe I was about to spill my biggest secret out of a dumb comment.
“Yeah, she's got a point. The guy spent half the meeting talking about some girl he scored with.” Charlie complained, which drew a humorless chuckle from me.
While Charlie praised Pentious for his performance, I noticed Angel Dust walking up the stairs with a weird look on his face. He usually kept up this act of being horny all the time, now it's just… gone. A small confused frown settled on my lips before I walked to my room, excited to call Carmilla.
˚₊‧ ꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚
Loud crashing and arguing roused me from my sleep. I opened my eyes and yawned, ears twitching towards the sounds below. It's like one in the morning, what in Heaven's name is up with these people?
With a groggy whine, I got up from my plush mattress and waddled down the stairs, following Charlie and Vaggie to the library with half-lidded eyes. I pushed the door open and saw Angel glaring at Sir Pentious, which made me tense in alert and my tail stiffen. I had a bad feeling about this.
“What's going on?” Charlie yawned.
Angel, with a grip on Pentious’ arm and an angry expression, gritted out, “This little bitch is a traitor!”
His words made me frown and I glared at the snake as well, claws protracting out of instinct as I awaited any confirmation. I knew there was no way he could change his mind in the span of six hours, I should never have let this happen. “Preposterous! I would never betray you. You are my best friends!"
I moved out of the way when he hugged Charlie and Vaggie, a grumble of apprehension and distrust falling from my lips. “Uh-huh, then explain this.” Angel pulled a book aside and uncovered a camera. I recognized it as a VoxTek device from the vibrant blue static line on the side, to which I bared my fangs and a low growl rumbled from my throat.
“You dirty little liar.” I hissed and took a step forward while Pentious scrambled to the window and pleaded for evacuation. Vox answered the phone and I trotted forward, standing just behind Pentious in case he had to be stopped.
“I can't believe we thought you could handle even something this simple,” Vox patronized. I should have known. I did know. I should have stopped it while I had the chance, I knew I shouldn't have let him in. “Do us a favor, if they don't kill you, go ahead and do it yourself, you miserable failure!”
My ears drooped and my lips morphed into a frown. That was really over the line, even for a back-stabber. I saw how the tears beaded up in the corners of his eyes and he lost hope, which made my heart hurt a little. He walked over to us and lied down on the ground, “Just make it quick, I guess… not that I deserve it.”
“Gladly.” Vaggie said and approached him with her spear, which made me hold out a hand in front of her to stop her.
“No, don't.”
“Pentious?” Charlie approached the snake curled up on the ground and extended a hand to him with a kind smile.
- It starts with sorry
I saw how he blinked with confusion when she chose to spare him, and to help him, no less. I watched with a soft tilt of my head and a little smile as she helped him up and encouraged him.
That's your foot in the door
One simple sorry
Charlie touched a hand to his chest, which made him look at her with a different look, almost one of surprise.
- The path to forgiveness is a twisting trail of hearts
But sorry is where it starts
Pentious shook his head and stepped aside, dejected and unconvinced.
- Who could forgive a dirtbag like me?
I don't deserve your amnesty
Can't we just kill him?
Shoot him and spill his blood?
Angel and Vaggie piled on, backing him into a shelf with their respective weapons, the spear and the machine guns. I walked to stand in front of Sir Pentious to keep them from harming him and sing,
- That's an option you could choose
- Works for us
- But who hasn't been in his shoes?
Charlie joined in with me at the next verse, once again extending her hand, and this time he took it, dancing along with her.
- It starts with sorry
- Sorry
- Dig down deeper and say one sincere sorry
- I'm so sorry
Pentious said dramatically but from the heart and dipped into our arms, which drew a smile from me and I pushed him back up to encourage him to keep going. Vaggie and Angel still looked skeptical, but to me it seemed honest.
- And your journey's under way
- It'll take time to cover your vast multitude of sins
But sorry is where it begins
It starts with sorry
Nifty walked in in a little pink nightgown, standing at the door with a pout. “I hated that song! Why are you so lame? Not a bad boy!” She gave him a little kick and stomped away and I laughed, patting him on the back and shaking my head fondly.
“Good first day,” Charlie sighed and walked out with Vaggie's arm around her waist, Angel following suit. “Let's get some rest.”
I chuckled softly and rested a hand on his shoulder, offering him a kind smile. “Welcome, new guy.”
He smiled back and nodded gratefully, then we walked along all together to our rooms. Before leaving the hallway, I heard Alastor's voice ringing out and Vox raging on the device, followed by Alastor's cackle. A smirk of satisfaction adorned my lips and my tail curled mischievously behind me as I walked away, satisfied with the Vees’ failure.
As long as they stayed away from my home, I'd be happy.
#hazbin hotel x reader#hazbin hotel#alastor x reader#hazbin alastor#lucifer morningstar x reader#hazbin hotel adam x reader#charlie morningstar x reader#hazbin hotel lute x reader#hazbin lute#vox x reader#hazbin hotel lute#lute x reader#lute#carmilla carmine x reader#carmilla x reader#hazbin hotel carmilla#carmilla carmine#hazbin angel dust#angel dust#hazbin hotel alastor#alastor#hazbin vox#hazbin hotel vox#vox#hazbin vaggie#vaggie x reader#vaggie x charlie#vaggie#hazbin hotel vaggie#the lion chronicles
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My Top 10 Favourite Male Villains of all time.
"How arrogant of you to think that any of us are anything but irrelevant". -John Greer, Person of Interest (2011-2016).
There comes a moment in a blog's life where some things are just long overdue, and while the argument could be made that this happened way too early, I'd say that as long as this helps me to find my groove, I am free to experiment as much as I want.
So..... Villains.
Gotta love them. As long as I do not meet them in real life. This post is in particular about male villains since I have one dedicated to their female counterparts in the pipeline so expect that to come soon enough and for this part to be rewritten. By the way, "villain" is a generalisation, I can totally put antivillains, antagonists or more general antiheroes in this list; your definition of "Bad Guy" can vary greatly and so can mine, someone like Walter White from Breaking Bad could have made it in here. My taste is very unusual, so prepare yourself for some unexpected picks.
Also, since these are meant to be some big celebratory posts, for the occasion I'll reveal my Italian heritage and translate every line of dialogue in Italian and publish it separately with a link, so that English readers who are learning Italian can exercise.
But first, some honourable mentions:
Oropo (Wakfu): Once you see the number 2 spot for both this list and the female villains list you might notice a certain pattern regarding my personal preferences when it comes to which characters I tend to gravitate towards the most, but while we're just talking about this guy, I cannot stress enough the amount of wasted potential that lies within his concepts and execution. Really needed two seasons of 25 episodes each to explore it to their maximum.
Tai Lung (Kung Fu Panda): Really like him, but not as much as others, I'll explain it better in one of the entries of my villainesses list. Also, unironically I feel like he's too sympathetic for his own sake and the movie's.
Bill Chyper (Gravity Falls): It's been way too long since I watched Gravity Falls, I really can't give you an accurate opinion on this guy anymore.
Flintheart Glomgold (DuckTales 2017): That season 2 episode. If you know what I'm talking about, you KNOW. Also the music for that whole sequence was a banger, really driving home the deranged nature of that twist reveal.
Big Jack Horner (Puss in Boots The Last Wish): I feel like when people praise Jack for being a breath of fresh air in a stale environment, they often forget just how good of a villain he was in his own right without the larger industry wide void of truly devious antagonists that act out of pure malice.
The Wolf (Puss in Boots The Last Wish): Two villain entries from one movie? Of course it was gonna be The Last Wish, what else could it be? Honestly I don't even wanna talk about this guy, you need to experience the movie for yourself.
Rob (The Amazing World of Gumball): Everything I have to say about this guy gets talked about much better by the number 6 Spot on this list, but as it stands Rob was my first villain OTP and the guy who opened the box of Pandora for me on what an antagonist could and should be, since then my perception of villainy only widened and now I enjoy their role in a story in much different way.
And now, with that out of the way, let's finally start with the ranking of my personal favourite male villains of all time.
Major spoilers down below:
Number 10: Silco (Arcane)
This guy is the reason that brought me to specify who or what counted for this list as trying to simplify Silco into one specific group of characters is a challenge that can only end in a misunderstanding of what makes Silco such a complex and fascinating character with an amazing character arc, that ends with him not being redeemed, mind you, but allows the audience to grieve in such a way that would make a side character death jealous.
When writing an antagonistic character, Silco is my goal and high standard, and just for that he deserves all of my respect and endless praise.
Now, admittedly, Silco's arc takes a while to kick in, but it works out to his advantage by the end of it since you don't realise just how much you've grown to care for him until he's dead and you're left with the surprise.
10 out 10, the nation of Zaun would have been much better (worse) with him than with Vander.
Number 9: The Riddler (DC)
The Riddler is literally my ride or die villain, when I'm in the mood for him, he's literally my favourite antagonist ever; when I am not in the mood for him, I completely forget about his existence.
When compared to many other entries on this list, Riddler is definitely more on the pop culture side of antagonism, and when you've been around for almost a century, you tend to have many different versions of the same character written by different writers, so I wanted to highlight here my favourite versions of him:
Arkham Games: He's hilarious. He's not my ideal Riddler, but whenever he comes on screen, his whiny rat's ass voice stimulates my pheromones.
Batman The Animated Series: I've heard somewhere that this version of him is disappointing, and to that I'll say... yeah, but only when he wasn't on screen, because otherwise, he kind of slayed.
Matt Reeves The Batman: This is the version that rekindled my love for him after so long. Out of every interpretation of The Riddler throughout the years, this is the one version that treated Edward more as a character rather than an obstacle for Batman to overcome, and for that I'll be eternally grateful.
LEGO Batman The Videogame: My very first introduction to The Riddler and the Batman universe as a whole, this version has a permanent place in my heart , I love how much information and emotion you can get out of him by just looking at his mannerisms and quirks alone; unironically, being silent helps him reach that quote on quote idealised version of Riddler that I was talking about earlier.
Number 8: The Snatcher (A Hat In Time)
There are many things that can carry on a villain in a story, their evolution, stage presence, complexity, thematic contrast to their counterpart, and so on and so forth. While an antagonist can check off many of these boxes simultaneously (like the one pictured), there's one box that is almost impossible to truly nail perfectly: comedy.
You see, comedy is subjective, and when your main antagonist is also the funniest part of a given story, it becomes hard to also match a sense of gravity and menace that allows them to also be an imposing threat, even harder is to give said antagonist depth and a tragic backstory.
But somehow, out of nowhere, The Snatcher from A Hat In Time manages to simultaneously be the funniest character in his section of the game, carrie said energy throughout the whole experience even down to the DLC, simultaneously strikes the balance between being scary, wholesome, sympathetic and tragic, exude an insane amount of charisma, all while having a deeply disturbing backstory that touches on some heavy themes and re contextualises his actions into something more complicated and out of a broken man, everything I just said + he's the biggest bastard in his videogame and never repents nor does he have his actions called out.
Snatcher really has all the right cards that make a stationary character work and uses them to his maximum potential, and it works because his character arc throughout the game is more about becoming affectionate to Hat Kid than it is about redeeming himself.
Lastly, his voice actor, Luke Sizemore, aka Yungtown, really sells the performance of this devious soul eating worm and burns his catchphrases into your brain for the rest of eternity.
Fool.
Number 7: Judge Claude Frollo (Hunchback of Notre Dame)
You can never say no to a classic.
There's nothing that I could say that hasn't already been said by thousands of videos on YouTube, but I'll try anyway: you see, Frollo is the reason why we need a new term to identify certain villains that aren't "sympathetic" but still make you feel some sort of human emotion and a form of "I wish someone could give you the care you need to fix your life", I guess the term empathetic exists, but when do you really see it used?
Now, don't get me wrong, Frollo is absolutely not sympathetic in the slightest, he wants to r##e a Romani woman that's way younger than him, but you can still feel that he's very troubled about it in the Hellfire scene and has definitely a lot of unidentified issues and internalised bigotry that could be worked through, even if it's too late to work through them right now.
In general, I feel like people forget that the main reason why past Disney villains worked had to do more with their human traits juxtaposed to their malice rather than just their plain wickedness, otherwise the Horned King from the Black Cauldron would be top of the Disney villains league and that couldn't be further from the truth.
We should really strive towards writing more villains like Frollo, less omnipotent beings that end up falling flat because they don't have much thematic relevance aside from being a threat (Bill Chyper works because he represents Ego and he's used sparingly) and more average vicious individuals who use their power and influence to get what they want.
All in all, if you've seen The Hunchback of Notre Dame, then you know why this guy is here.
Number 6: The Spot (Spider-man across the Spiderverse)
"You've hit me with a bagel!" It's still the greatest villain origin story of all time. There's truly something maniacal about this reveal, like the entire universe was shattered and reality was shocked at the mere realization that while Miles was having his coming of age moment back in the first film, this guy was having his normal life completely and utterly shattered by a combination of both our heroes stepping up to do the right thing and our doofus lack of foresight and self reflection; all of this stuff is hilarious and completely made up for the film but good god they did such an amazing job tying all the elements together in an unexpected way that makes sense and parallels the journey that our protagonist faced in the first movie.
Like with Rob from The Amazing World of Gumball, and a little bit like number 2 on this list, I just really enjoy the concept of turning background characters who had no relevance whatsoever into the big bad of the story who's been there all along and the heroes (and the audience) just couldn't notice.
With The Spot in particular, there's that sense of satisfaction of turning the wasted potential of a villain who has been underestimated for literal decades and treated as a "villain of the week" (God do I love the meta narrative of this movie) into an actual competent, well written antagonist that is aware of his reputation and strives towards bettering himself and his powers.
He's also the funniest character of his movie too and the voice acting of Jason Schwartzman only accentuates his mannerisms and pettyness.
He also has the coolest usage of portals I have ever seen and his whole "There's a hole inside all of us" is simultaneously hilarious and very deep personal information that can only be understood if you put yourself into his shoes.
Number 5: Lord Shen (Kung Fu Panda)
"Happiness must be taken. And I'll take mine"
.....
What a character.
What a movie.
You cause so much pain and suffering, because you don't understand the people around you, and then those people banish you, and you can't understand why, so you start to believe that they hated you.
They never loved you, so you keep causing pain and suffering but it's not that easy anymore; the guilt starts to resurface, all those bodies keep piling up, but you can't stop because then it would have all been for nothing; so you keep chasing those dreams of grandeur because that's all you have left; the emptiness in your heart can no longer be filled by love, so you try to fill it with something else.
You try to fill it with power. You try to fill it with glory. You try to take everything else for yourself so that you can fill that cup, but it doesn't work, because that cup has no bottom.
And so you're left... with yourself.
And the damage you've done. But now it's different; you've failed. You are left with nothing. Nothing.
And so you outrage, for the last time... And then it all ends. Forever. And you've finally come to accept this, after all....... Who could ever love you?
Number 4: Spamton G Spamton (Deltarune)
You know, in retrospect, it's kind of insane what Toby Fox managed to achieve when creating Spamton.
Not only because Spamton feels like the most insane combination of ideas ever conceived, but also because Toby Fox created such a complex character with such a complicated language and personality and then not only shafted it all aside for the players to go out of their way to interact, but also made all of this in what are officially 2 or 3 cutscenes at most (4 if you consider his shop encounter as one) and only one of them being truly mandatory.
You spend so little time with Spamton, and most of that time is spent fighting him, and yet by the end of it you've become enlightened by the knowledge of him, that after a while... you forget how scary it all was.
All the memes comparing Spamton with Turbo are 100% correct and justified, Spamton truly is Turbo but better; you go through an insane rollercoaster of emotions with this character that you are left absolutely dumbfounded when it all comes to a stop and you go back to play the rest of chapter 2 normally.
I'll admit, I've considered putting Spamton in place of the Number 3 spot on this list; but then I've realised that on an objective level, the next entry totally deserves to be ranked above Spamton; plus, with at least 5 more chapters of Deltarune on our way, whose to say that one of the next gremlins won't be able to dethrone even the number 1 spot?
Drumroll for our top 3:
Nox, the Watchmaker (Wakfu)
There will never be another experience in my life as cathartic as watching the first season of Wakfu for the first time ever again.
On a later rewatch, the initial problems of the problems you've noticed throughout the season become too apparent to ignore, but the first time everything that goes from the tournament to the finale is one of the best paced arcs of television, and everything that happens when the team reaches the Sadida kingdom is just peak Wakfu.
And the king, the culprit, the crown jewel of properly paced stories and arcs is no other than the sad clockwork dilf himself: Noximilliem Coxen the Watchmaker.
Arguably, the greatest sympathetic villain of all time. There has never been another case of a character who has committed such vile, unspeakable crimes, and yet still managed to make me root for them while simultaneously not putting down the heroes.
And let's not be mistaken here, Nox is pretty evil:
Aside from the generic murder, Nox also defiled and stitched together the corpses of multiple victims and turned them into his obedient puppets in order to commit even more murder and genocide in order to achieve his goals.
Also, this is one of the funniest crimes Nox has committed: he abused his dog. It's really not that funny nor that important in the context of the show, but if you look back at it from my perspective then it's really like: Oh yeah. That happened too. Lol.
Words alone cannot do justice to the treacherous, gut wrenching emotional rollercoaster that is experiencing his story for the first time. An hour long video essay would only serve to cover the basics and fundamentals, while for the real deal you need to watch the first season of Wakfu for yourself.
Number 2:
Bradford Buzzard (DuckTales 2017)
And now it's the perfect time to pull out my final wild card, the hole of the sink of my autism, the masterpiece of wasted potential that is Bradford Buzzard from the DuckTales remake of 2017.
When you'll also see the number 2 spot on my villainesses list, you'll come to realise that this spot is more of the "I really wish I could put this at number one but I can't because objectively he doesn't deserve it and the majority of things I love about him in canon were probably an afterthought and in fanon were never plausible to begin with."
And that's how I feel about Bradford Buzzard, an antagonist I spent more time thinking about than probably anybody else on the Earth.
The show runners were so genius for this: we are going to create an original character that will probably struggle to maintain a foot print on the franchise due to the way the Duck verse works, we'll give him an insanely cool backstory and motivation, all coupled with interesting character traits and ideology, we'll make him the ultimate foil to Scrooge McDuck that has been working with him for literal decades, we'll make him the one who has got the closest to isolating Scrooge and destroying his family, and THEN we'll turn him into a generic anime villain that shoots lasers and fumbles his own plan and loses because of insane plot armour and contrivance. Good job writers.
And now, for the one and only,
Number 1:
(Note: I specifically chose this picture to avoid spoilers)
Qilby (Wakfu)
Boy oh boy, where do I even begin with this guy, he's the first Wakfu related post I've made on this blog for a good reason, nothing can compare to the level of bastardy that this thumb sucking old fart is capable of putting you through.
If Nox is the single greatest sympathetic villain of all time, then Qilby is by far the greatest twist villain of all time, and the crazy thing is that he surprises you two times in a row, at first by revealing himself as more evil than you could ever imagine, and the second time by being more complex than you could have ever anticipated.
Let me paint you the picture: you just finished the first season of Wakfu after being drawn towards the show by the hype surrounding Nox, so you think to yourself "Oh, now there won't be any more thought provoking, well written antagonists" and you start the second season.
So far, everything is normal, even better of the first season in terms of engagement value, but you can't help but feel the lack of a Nox like figure inside of the story, but at this point, you just accept it.
Then the final six episodes roll around and OH MY GOD WHAT IS HAPPENING, HAS THE WHOLE SHOW JUST GONE INSANE? ( The answer being that it was insane from the start)
But hey.
That's just Qilby for you.
Good job, you old sad bunny man.
#top 10#big jack horner#puss in boots death#person of interest#john greer#wakfu#oropo#kung fu panda#tai lung#gravity falls#bill cipher#ducktales 2017#flintheart glomgold#the amazing world of gumball#tawog rob#arcane#silco#dc universe#the riddler#a hat in time#ahit snatcher#the hunchback of notre dame#judge claude frollo#spiderman across the spiderverse#atsv spot#lord shen#deltarune spamton#wakfu nox#bradford buzzard#wakfu qilby
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Full Kook - Part 2
A Protective/Sweet/Obsessive/Possessive!Rafe&JJ Fanfic
-'The Morning After' -
Warnings: Mentions of drugs, Alcohol, Language, SA, Abuse, Sex, Bad writing!!
Word count: 1.9K
Summary of Part 1: Small teaser of what life with Thomas Brooks is like. Including the advantages and disadvantages of living with the 3 most troubled boys on Kildare Island.
Previous part
Bella’s Pov:
"Good morning!!!" I call, skipping into the living room after getting freshly washed and ready for the day.
JJ and Rafe both lay asleep on the couch and without me interfering I know full well they will never wake up.
Just the sound of my voice alone causes both boys to sit up, turning to me on high alert as if I was being murdered. I giggle at the sight, knowing both of them would go miles to protect me, causing a slight blush to colour my cheeks.
"Morning, sleepyheads!" I repeat, dragging my fingers through their hair, watching as their drowsy eyes follow my own with a sleepy smile spread across both their faces.
"G'morning gorgeous.." JJ reaches back to take my waist in his hand, squeezing softly as a yawn escapes his mouth.
He lifts himself off the couch, placing a kiss ontop my head; leaving me with Rafe as he excuses himself to the bathroom.
Rafe leans over to the table, helping himself to the last of his drag as he turns his body towards me; a smile taking his lips. "Sleep good, princess?" His fingers glaze mine that sat on the back of the couch beside him; a smile pulling at my cheeks as I struggle to keep eye contact.
The way they both speak to me sends me into a spiral, but admitting it would be like telling them the whole island wants them; they’re both true but saying it out loud would confirm them and I’m not gonna let myself deal with the outcome.
Rafe notices my blushed cheeks, causing a smirk to appear along his face, well aware of the effect he has on me. I nod, face brightening before the moment gets cut short by a slam of a door.
Me and Rafe never get time to be alone; I'm always with JJ or my dad, and Rafe and I aren't the most accepted friends by the island so hanging out alone seems almost a rarity. So those little moments when we do get a bit of silence together is quite peaceful and very cherished by the both of us. The need of more takes over sometimes; alone time with Rafe is the only time I can really let my hair down and relax, surprisingly, so who can blame me for wanting more from time to time?
Me and Rafe both look up past the living room as JJ comes back out, staring at his hand. "J? You okay?" I walk over, watching as his eyes darken, only growing my concern. Rafe's expression falls and his attention turns back to his joint, wishing to be able to talk to me even that little bit more, not caring at all for the unnecessary drama JJ is probably going to make over the smallest thing (yet again), most likely a tiny paper cut or something.. and me babying him like it’s the end of the world because my maternal instincts kick in whenever either of them have even the littlest issue.
"JJ, what's going on?" My eyebrows dip as I tilt my head to catch his expression. He lifts his own slowly as he gives me his fist. I watch his eyes as I raise my hands to open his palm. Catching a glimpse of a smirk on his face, my eyes widen knowing exactly where this is going.
He reaches down, quickly chucking me over his shoulder as he runs round to the couch; throwing me down beside Rafe, before pegging it towards my room. He only made it as far as the kitchen before I reached him, pulling myself onto his back and hooking my legs around his waist, securing myself onto him.
He laughs, grabbing my thighs to adjust me into a more comfortable position before accepting it and deciding to make some toast.
I giggle in his ear, watching the pure enjoyment take over his face as he mindlessly helps himself in my kitchen.
I turn back as best I could to see Rafe sat on the couch still, legs spread, scrolling on his phone. I frown, about to open my mouth before-
"Sunshine, 'm ho- get off him!!"
We all adjust ourselves: me dropping off of JJ's back, JJ hiding the knife and toast behind him as he turns around to conform to whatever words come out of my Dad's mouth next, and Rafe sitting up, grabbing the ash tray and sliding it beneath the couch, unaware that there was absolutely no backing to it.
Me and JJ glare at each other before watching the now obvious joint sat at my dad's feet.
"Sh.. shit.." Rafe looks up at me expecting some sort of reaction or snarky comment but by the pure fear in my eyes he knew it was worse than a little joke.
I follow dad’s body as he leans down, picking up the tray, and guiding it to his face to take a sniff. Without hesitation, he storms over, the anger in his eyes seeping into my blood. I could feel a lump gathering in the back of my throat.
JJ’s hand found mine, squeezing tightly as he pulls me into his side safely and slowly enough that my dad wouldn’t pick up on it.
“What the hell is this?!” Dad shoves the weed-filled cigarette into my face, causing a flood of coughs to escape my mouth. “Hm?” He jerks his head to the side, pulling my attention back to him as I clear my throat once more.
My mouth falls open but no words manage to leave; my eyes glass over and JJ’s grip on my hand tightens letting me know how painfully obvious I was being.
“Going to explain, or are ya' just gonna stand there like a little lost sheep?” His voice was low, gravelly, like he’d just rolled out of bed. But I knew it wasn’t the truth. It cut straight through the tension building in the air like a knife, making JJ take a breath and straighten himself up. Acting from experience..
“Sir.” He coughs, grabbing my dad’s focus. “She had no part in it, sir. It’s mine, promise.” Rafe let's a light tug at his lips at the thought of JJ taking the full blame, when they both know JJ would get the worst of it anyways.
We watch as his face falls, eyebrows dipping so low his eyes were unnoticeable. “Bella.” He speaks but his eyes don’t leave JJ’s. “Tell me. I won’t ask again. What. Is. This?” His sentences were short and blunt. The obvious impatient tone in his voice making my blood run cold. The sheer nothingness behind his eyes, I was used to by now, but still struck a point of fear in me nothing else could.
I don’t get scared of much. I grew up watching R-rated movies, went ghost hunting with JJ and Rafe in abandoned buildings from the age of like 10, had JJ’s horror games on in the background of my room at 3 am every night because he couldn’t sleep. Yet something about my dad always got to me. It wasn’t even the fact he was a threat, it was just that look on his face, constantly, that always seemed to hit a nerve.
“Dad..” I manage to let out before swallowing the courage to stand up to him this early in the morning. I step closer, wrapping my arms lightly around his beer belly and resting my head against his chest. I forced my eyebrows from scrunching as I held myself together, “I’m sorry.. I promise, I didn’t do anything. I didn’t even know it was there.. Just, please let it be, we had a good day yesterday..” The slight crack in my softened tone caused my dad’s arm to take my body into his own.
He places a kiss to my head, “Thank you.. 'm glad to hear you three are still gettin' along.”
I lift my head, tilting it slightly at his words, “We’ve always been okay?”
A calming smile takes his lips, steadying my nerves as I watch his face brighten from the sight of me, “Y'know, I’ll always worry 'bout my li'l girl.. Just makin' sure is all, Sunshine.” He kisses me again, this time on the bridge of my nose, before looking back at Rafe, his grip firmly settled on my hip. “You’re lucky I don’t speak to your father 'bout this. 'nd you?” His head shoots to JJ and I see him flinch, almost, at the motion; the feeling of guilt eating into me wondering why I threw the blame onto him in the first place. “I told ya' to keep that away from 'er. I know that you’re old enough to make your own decisions but if you’re living under my roof, you go by my rules. Understand?”
I grip onto the bit of fabric that sat under my hand, lightly tugging to let my dad know he’s being too rough. Usually the action would cause an outburst but with Rafe and JJ around he’s naturally much calmer anyways. I wish I was joking..
JJ nods almost instantly, his adam’s apple bobbing as he gulped down his fear.
My dad’s like a lion, any sign of fear and he attacks.
That was a joke by the way..
Dad chuckles, a laugh that caused a shiver down anyone's spine. He pulls JJ into him, squeezing him hard as he pats his palm to his back. “Love you, kid..”
I didn’t hear what he said to him, but the smile that appeared across JJ’s cheeks melted my heart. Only dad can make him smile like that, and it genuinely heals that little part of me that ever thought he was a bad person. Seeing JJ smile is my world, and I’d watch it over and over if I could.
Dad pats his back once more before standing back up, “Right toilet, then work! Ready, Sunshine?”
I smile, giving him a nod, “Of course!” I exclaim, lightly running my fingers over my skirt.
He heads off to the bathroom and I hurry JJ and Rafe out whilst he’s still in a good mood.
“Will you be at the club today?” I rest a hand on Rafe’s chest as his arm lays against the small of my back, a soft smile pulling at his cheeks.
“Obviously, princess.. See you there. You’ll be alright?” He motions his head over to the bathroom door and I let out a small laugh.
“Rafe Cameron.. Worried about me..? Bella Brooks? He could never..” I giggle my words out softly, watching his expression harden before a smirk pulls through. A breath escaping the gap of his lips as he pulls my head into his neck, his arms engulfing me in his scent.
“GOD!! You two done? Gotta go before her dad decides we’re dead meat bro.” He smacks Rafe’s back, taking me from his arms and into his own.
Rafe lets out a deep sigh as he watches discontently. My head laying on JJ’s chest the same way it was on his, wondering what could be going through JJ’s head, only imagining the worst.
“See you tonight, alright..? Be careful, and call if you need anything.” He rests his forehead on mine, his lips landing a kiss on the tip of my nose as I return one back.
“Will do. Dad..” I smirk, watching his face drop and his hands shove me away.
“Fuck you too, asshole.” He drags Rafe out the door before we got a chance to say goodbye and I giggle at the thought of our previous interaction.
Once dad was ready we headed off to the Island Club for work; talking shit about anything and anyone we were just about to face 5 minutes from now.
Didn’t realise how little happened in such a chunk of words until I read through it lol. Long awaited second part which isn’t finished but thought it’d been too long since the first part so just split it instead 😭
Enjoy ❤️🌹 xx
Masterlist
#jj maybank#rafe cameron#jj obx#rafe obx#jj outer banks#rafe outer banks#obx#outer banks#drew starkey#rudy pankow#jj imagine#rafe imagine#rafe cameron imagine#jj maybank imagine#oc#rafe x oc#jj x oc#outerbanks#outer banks fanfiction#outerbanks jj#outerbanks rafe#outerbanks fic#outerbanks imagine#rafe fanfiction#jj fanfiction#rafe fic#jj fic#obx rafe cameron#obx fanfiction#obx fic
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aro kid in class keeps challenging the idea of love as a universal theme in plays/stories but like. so far they’ve exclusively done it to other people who r aro
#i also. idk i think they keep approaching it in a bit of a bad faith way#i don’t think that everyone experiences love or that it’s what makes us human or anything#but i do think that the perception of love is an indisputable part of the fabric of our world. like you can’t just ignore it’s influence on#- society and stories? in fact i think that’s the point of amanormativity?#they did this last semester about company….. 2 me a guy who wrote a whole essay abt why company is aro#also the thing today was about twelfth night and. maybe they just weren’t listening bc i do not think rose ever said love as a universal the#*theme#just that ideas present at the time of its writing also resonate with people today#and their whole concept was that the characters ideas of ‘love’ was shallow#it’s so not important they just keep using ‘i’m aro’ as a bit of a gotcha and like. bud so am i!!#ted talks
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28.04.2023
So much happened this week. (In tags I'll rant about it)
N4 is coming and my prep is not at all good. Took a test today and i failed🥲. But i know my prep is soo bad,it was bound to happen. So have to study for that.
College exams are coming🥹 also have to study for that. The dissertation proposal is in the finalising stage,so that's good. But have to work on it properly imo.
Then i also proposed another research study to my professor and he has encouraged me to go for it. So,also have to work on it.
These very cutu plants in the scorching heat were a treat to eyes and mind.
Got this book from the library and I'm really enjoying reading the essays.
( correction in a tag- she scored less than me in class and she was all sad sad. With her i had to suppress my happiness at moments like these)
#here i go#so here in this clg i have 2 friends mainly they are my classmates and one is roomates also so thsi roomate is very toxic i kinda knew it#from the start but ignoted it bcs we became friends when we used to have online lectures and haven't met each other and somethings happened#in which she helped me so i was kinda obliged to stay w her. and after sometime i kinda strted feeling it. all the bad vibes#the toxicity she carry for other ppl judging them on their appearances and whenever i trued to correct her tries to manipulate things#like she jas all of the mean girl vibe but i the clown couldn't just had the courage or ways to not be w her i so wnated to but couldn't#it was all so fucked up and living w her. i changed i started judging ppl. this was so bad. she went through soem toughtimes and as i frien#friend i cared for her i was there for her almost all the times and most of the times whenever i needed her she was not.#tries to dominate always and the incident due to ehich I'm writing all this is - I'm not earing well properly well from past month she know#and last sunday i was very excited to this dish and i wanted to take more and she said very rudely how much more will you eat? i said i did#not had lunchand almost didn't eat the ehole day what's yhe nig deal abt it why tou saying and stopping me like that and she said i did not#say it she said again i did not say it with that rude voice like she can never be wrong and ppl wjom i rarely talk to have noticed that#I've lost weight but she who luves wirh me almost all the time do not know it whom I've talked to abt this don't knwo it . i didn't have#any appetite after that i just stuffed the food unsideand went outside wiyjout syaing anything 8 wanted ro puke so bad i controlled my#i couldn't beleive what just happened i didn't try to talk to her and she obviously wouldn't bcs of teh ego and then there's another friend#and classmate of us and she has a great bond w her then after taht incident she is also not talking ro me and. avoiding me in the corridor#making me feel like I'm the onw wrong here and thwse 2 ppl were not on talking term a week ago again ego calshes this other girl didn't#so yeah i got snakes here#now I'm all alone but this feels great literally like yes i cried and couldn't sleep bcs even tho i knew they are not always what they show#they were the only obes here i was able to form a bond with ( i hate this part so much now)and i care abt friendships alot but it ended#they are not talking to me I'm not talking to them. but thus whole thing made me free now I'm free i don't have to wait for them everytime#i want to go to library or to a class or to a walk bcs they wanted everything to be done in a grp#and I'm going everyday out to study to walk and to jyst peacefully live bcs now I don't have to deal with negativity and toxicity anymore#i feel myself again my trye self who was kind to ppl who wanted to just study quietly in evening who wanted to just go in class on time#i don't have to feel that if i di this will she judge me I'm feeling free with what I'm wearing I'll enjoy and celebrate all my wins#and achievements of the last year bcs i couldn't even enjoy those when i was with her just bcs she didn't got less tahn me#I'm smiling more nad I'm loving more myself to actually avle to come out of thsi spiral i didn't even know i could so yay#listening to you're on your own kid in loop and it made me so happy#that's it done. there was so much to say ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh hope you got some idea of what's happening in my life#sending you all love and light and if you find urslf in somesimilar situation or any difficulty rn hope you get out of it very soon<3
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I almost accidentally texted my boss that “it’s so hard being a teenage girl in her 20s” :-(
#I also almost told her I couldn’t come in bc I couldn’t trust myself to keep up my little work persona#but I also powered through and didn’t say that#I could’ve tho she doesn’t care what I say#idk I called off summer school this week and like my bad bc I did in fact sign up to do it 💀 but dear god I would die if I lost it#I haven’t cried at this job yet (outside of injury but thats legal crying 🙏) and I will not be breaking my streak#it’s fine we were way over staffed to begin with and half the kids have job placements so like I’d be bored out of my mind anyway#I’m just going to go back to sleep and then go see my mom#I hope Andy printed my little pieces for my costume but when I asked him last night he kept being like ohhh I lose the blah blah#you’re missing parts 😐 of my 600 dollar printer 😐 that I left with you because you said you’d take care of it if I let you use it 😐#ough it’s fine if there any more problems then idk Lydia’s GODD at problem solving and she will be here tomorrow night well at midnight we#so we are probs just coming right home and going to sleep but we have 2 days to get crisis work done if we have to#I’m so lonely I’m going back to sleep#my apologies to my students lol#I HEART 8 AM PERSONAL DIARY POSTING I’m getting such a good grade from my doctor when I tell her#my posts
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gotten so fed up with the inability to find some decent goddamned blue hair dye that i've resorted to buying my usual brand *online*
#eliot posts#punky colour brand lagoon blue hair dye my beloved#got two cans of that and then some other shades i'd not tried before#bc you gotta have more than $30 purchase to get the free shipping#but $32 for 6 jars of dye are not bad#it's already cheapass stuff (which is why i tried it in the first place) but there was also a sale going on#so it's cheaper than it was back when i could buy it from walmart#i've only tried 3 brands of hair dye thus far#1: splat. the results are aight but it's a fucking nightmare to apply. no thanks.#2: punky colour. used to cost around $8 for 3.5 oz. super super concentrated.#i'd usually mix 1 part dye to 1-2 parts conditioner and leave it in for longer than the instructions said#and the colour would come out SUPER rich and vivid nonetheless. so in practice the jars are more like 7oz#if you write off the cost of the conditioner you mix it with (and you can use cheapass conditioner) anyway#3: unicorn hair. just under 7 oz for $16. not very concentrated. looks like when i mix 2 parts conditioner in w the prev brand#i can leave it on for over an hour and it won't get too dark or too neon. just stays a simple light shade#which is good for beginners who don't wanna accidentally get way too vivid of a colour but not for my purposes#was gonna try manic panic but am allergic#have not tried arctic fox yet bc it is expensive + i hate bottled dye i prefer jars + none of the shades in the store stood out to me#weren't any other brands than those in sally beauty OR walmart last i checked
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Sorry abt the occasional digiposting as of late, im coming to terms w/ the fact that it's starting to grow on me orz
#clenches fists.#wondertext#I started watching it w/ some friends recently..for nostalgia reasons in their case‚ but also to introduce me 2 the franchise as well#since it never rly was part of my childhood & i was curious as to what the fuss was all about hsjwjfj#Anyways i never rly took the events all that seriously since I thought shit was so off the wall it was funny But#after nearly 24 episodes i've found myself getting emotionally invested w/ the show at last 😭😭 it's been a journey#ive been progressively getting accustomed to all of its strange concepts . I think im desensitized at this point /lh#like evn the monsters themselves now have me like..ok...Youre not so bad after all. u got a creepy-cute kinda thing goin on &i respect that#(<- Used to find their designs unpleasant. still do a little bit even now tbh sorry But i do appreciate their uniqueness a whole lot)#But yeah i feel Like ive been put thru an entire character arc w/ this thang .#You should've seen the way i used to freak out during the 1st few episodes Everything was So Insane 2 me. it had me flabbergasted#it was like . Lighthearted charming OP song -> Children having a near-death experience in the most surreal way possible#-> Isekai moment -> We get introduced to the ugliest little beasts i've ever seen#-> They spend the rest of the episode almost dying Again -> beast transform into even Uglier beasts & go feral on each other#-> World's calmest most soothing ED sequence that clashes So Hard w/ the tone that was set during the episode it makes ur brain crash.#and thats more-or-less the formula that's been handled throughout the following episodes up until this point#but i suppose I've grown fond of it by now 🧎 I am a Changed man‚ i See the appeal‚ I Understand#well not rly prbablyBut at least each episode keeps me@the edge of my seat now as opposed 2 how i used to enjoy it in more of an ironic way#'tis nice honestly..I've become more appreciative of the kinda vibe the show handles‚ it's got a lot going on :} It's /insanely/ creative
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obsessively detailed DNIs and lack of good faith reading of strangers' words and discussing the rights to exclude xyz for being too weird for your (public) space and this person reblogged a post from a person who follows a person who follows a person who's suspect and righteous anger over any and every misstep of performance and waiting to catch people out and complete lack of trust and...
are you guys... happy?
do you have people around you that form a community? people who aren't carbon copies of yourself or online yes men? do you know people who aren't your age/gender/race/ethnicity/body/brain/don't have the same financial background, educational story, etc?
not all of these all at once all at the same time, but do you go outside your head, is what I mean?
do you remember that other people are people? have you had the opportunity to train yourself to have grace for the fact that everyone has faults and blindspots and perspectives that come from a life led differently, and that to hear and take in those differences make you richer, more understanding, less shut off?
are you able to discuss things while understanding that there is a middle ground? do you think anger and despair are the only emotions worth accessing in order to be a "good" person?
do you have people around you that aren't like you?
are you happy?
#happy pride#idk im preaching to the choir here im sure#but over the last year ive been trying to follow people in communities that i am a part of and/or want to support#and it seems like they're 1. online all the time 2. angry in ways that lead nowhere 3. quite young?#and im thinking back to me 10 years ago and i was SO angry and so isolated and so terrified of other people#and it wasnt as bad to be online then as it is now in terms of You Have To Prove Yourself Worthy And Flagellate Constantly#ive had to unfollow practically every one of those blogs and not because i dont feel warm towards the people who run them#but it's not activism and it's not good for you#also i have looked at exactly 2 dnis out of interest and i understood like... half the words/abbreviations#they're really not a useful tool and they don't appear to be for anyone but a small crowd who understand them anyway?#and even then i think they're more for people who understand and DO agree than those who don't who Will Not Care#anyway..... wheres that post about *this pride get out of your head* yes!#also idk if this needs to be said but im not saying *talk to a violent extremist who wants you dead today*#(and if you believe that then see the bit about *lack of good faith reading*)#also tbh i did one time reach out to someone and go *hey this post is deeeeply dogwhistly* but tbh that was more about like#*i think ace people are gonna look at that post and literally read it as hate it's that surface level#and you probably don't want that reaction*#but checking back and back and back on post origins idk... i think we're using dogwhistles a little too liberally sometimes
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While im on my streak of doing slightly rebellious things, do i shave my undercut at home or do i go out and get it done at the last place i got it
#it wasnt expensive and it was a walk-in but they didn't really know how to do masculine cuts#and i genuinely feel like i could do the same job at home with a pair of mirrors to get the back done decently#and by 'slightly rebellious' i mean i got this purple shampoo to change my hair ever so slightly#bc my mom's never let me dye it because its such a 'unique colour' (basically natural highlights i think)#and the purple shampoo has made those highlight-ish parts a lot lighter#and i have pink dye to do some strips with when i get the home alone time and patience#but yee im sure i can find the razor dad used for my sibling in the extension or the storage cabinet and just go ham?#it cant be that bad. i can just tie up the long bits out the way and shave the short part?#its already separated by long and short and i know i had a grade 2 shave last time#i just go buzz buzz? and if it goes terrible i can just keep the long hair down and cover it#should be fine yeah? they did it easy enough
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#my only note for the next part of the sith au is ‘‘cela accidentally hurts jaq and he’s ok with it but she’s deeply not’’#and yet somehow it's not at all writing itself. HMM#maybe it's bc i'm also trying to fit ''jaq's best friend thinks cela's manipulating him and tries to convince jaq to 'break up' with her#but only ends up breaking jaq's trust in him & jaq does something terrible to him#thus taking his first real step to the dark side'' in there too#& also trying to retcon the end of the last part to delete everything that happened after leaving korriban bc it was too big of a timeskip#& also trying to think up what cela would possibly do for jaq's training/lessons#& at some point during all this establish that the jedi jaq failed to kill has gotten news back to the council that cela's still alive#so now the council wants cela dead* by any means necessary (*something close to death but not quite)#oh and somehow cela has to seriously reflect on her place in revan's army and wonder why revan Does keep her around and become#convinced that 1) she's on thin ice 2) jaq becoming her apprentice was orchestrated by revan who's using him to secretly evaluate#her DS level. which is partly bc she finally saw his korriban vision and read it as him being eternally loyal to revan#but also partly bc she needs an excuse to push him away bc she's afraid of letting him love her#oh and somehow their developing force bond is like stifled and one-way bc of cela's refusal to let him in#and jaq should somehow almost die from it to make cela think emotional connection is bad#and everyone who knows cela's entire backstory should believe that there's no way for cela/jaq to happen without one of them dying#and in fact revan's banking on it#but it turns out cela's refusal to fully connect with him is exactly what's been making jaq like a finite battery that can be drained & die#so like as usual the big bad is a fear of intimacy and the whole thing ends with cela accepting jaq's love#and once she Does connect with him & complete the force bond jaq is now more like a wire connecting cela to the endless force#zero resistance
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