having an anxiety episode. my brain won't turn off and let me sleep. i need tranquilizers or something that makes me stop thinking/worrying...weed is legal but that actually makes my anxiety worse. 1st panic attack i ever had was when i was high in college ...i think cigarettes actually kept them away until i quit at 28 and then they were back with a vengeance (is that really spelled that way) i don't drink because it makes me want to smoke...i hate me.

a spark in the dark

I went to a medieval faire this weekend! My partner and I dressed up and decorated my powerchair. We ate yummy food and bought really cool art from a local artist. It was far too crowded for my powerchair and our brains, but we still had a good time. 🐌

Brooo naurrr like I did not just add more paragraphs to a fic I posted in JANUARY of 2021. Because that would be super mega cringe on an ultimate level one can not comprehend. I can't keep getting away with this I'm gnawing at the bars of my poorly secured enclosure

i decided to walk to class cause it's beautiful out but I'm so so so so so tired from work :( I'll feel better once I get there tho :)

i cant have conversations with people because theyll like off handedly mention something and ill be like oh??? you know that thing??? youve mentioned it now. its all i can think about now. wait fuck no whyd you move on from the topic go back please i have so many thoughts stop

idk what my deal is because the new monster high black & white dolls look BEAUTIFUL but when I see them my brain is just like huh. Well that certainly has no color. Like the appeal of the b&w just doesn’t click? And again objectively they are lovely dolls but the aesthetic appreciation part of my mind is just drowned out by my most primal instincts being like “🤬 why Draccy Lauren is not pink 🤬🤬🤬”

hi i had dinner It would be so funny if

I get three days off and I lose my fucking mind. Need to have things to do constantly I think

Freaking out because of shetlands or smt

protip if you're going insane over a tv show try not to be sleep-deprived too bc it will make you worse

augh haven't caught the mouse and this animal is not quiet at all. Sounds ridiculous but i'm awake at 2:23 again because the mouse is chewing loudly.

screaming crying throwing up—Decked the Halls is here !! 🎄✨🎄

SURPRISE STENDYNATION !!!! I have been cooking up something and it's finally here !!! I am going to be giving you A WHOLE ASS STENDY MINI STORY FOR THE HOLIDAY SZN :')

I planned this abt a month ago, and was very nervous...BUT HERE IT IS !!!

updates every week or so :))))

IT'S ALSO A WATTPAD EXCLUSIVE RN !!! after the holidays it'll go on AO3 :)

I HOPE YOU ALL ENJOY IT BC I'M SO EXCITED SBGBBDSBGBBSGBSDKJ <333333333333333

kisses u all respectfully i love stendy enthusiasts

gonna go reread hard mouth

i have finally.... finally.... turned in my research paper.....

and now i can finally baldur those gates again. after three weeks.

but i'm torn. because on the one hand, i want to continue my wyll romance run. on the other, i want to do a new run and go through the astarion romance again, and hopefully trigger the scenes in order this time. for fic purposes.

i want to give wyll's romance the attention it deserves without my mind being split as i think about what i can use for my fic, but also, it feels like a total copout to pause that run to do another fuckin astarion run, + there's always uploaded cutscenes i could refer to for the fic...