you should be able to put an egg in the ground and then a chicken should just grow out of it like a pumpkin. Feet first, then legs. Like a stem for the rest of the chicken. In my opinion.

this hardly ever happens to me because i mostly buy/make clothes i personally think are nice, meaning not really connected to specific trends. Last year i fell for a Trend Product and bought a heartshaped keyhole sweater which already feels dated now because fast fashion is, unsurprisingly, fast. And stupidly wasteful. Anyway.

this too shall pass

In these parts, they say, if you are lucky when wandering the wastes between city and town, you may encounter a truly exemplary creature. Its skin, like that of the rhinoceros, plates its body in geometric folds; its feet are like four enormous sand-dollars, pleasing to the eye and rapid in their movement. Its snout is broad with the same placid strength as a great ox and its breath is heavy and warm as the same, but its eyes flash so like those of a lion at night that no traveler could believe it truly tame for long. The name of this beast? Toyota Corolla.

i love not opening the door. you are not getting in. 🙂

"Every man should pull a boat over a mountain once in his life."

Werner Herzog.

No experience more viscerally humiliating than walking through a heavily populated building with squeaky shoes. Look at me doing my little clown walk across the entire length of the building. Dumbass squeaking noises ringing out with every step. Sounds like I'm walking on two guinea pigs. I wish I was dead

His Undulations

I love Magpies, they just hang around your street in their little gangs (called Mischiefs) like feathered miscreants, iridescent ragamuffins, antisocial wee lads in search of bugs.

a post-doc was doing a guest seminar at my institute and at the beginning of his presentation he was explaining why he chose birds for his evolutionary analysis - so he said "well first of all, because birds are the best and most interesting animals and it's fun to study them" and a few professors in the room gave him a very serious nod

Same energy

Landscape with Rainbow by Franz Sedlacek, 1930

The computer is a machine built for looking at pictures of fish you wouldn't otherwise see. Anything else you can do with a computer was an accident and unintended

every parrot is born with the instinct to rob you of cheese.

the smiths is so fucking funny. i was looking for a job and then i found a job and heaven knows im miserable now. yeah alright. top ten relatable lyrics. steven patrick morrisey wails in his stupid wobbly english and im like yeah. if a double decker bus crashes into us to die by your side is such a heavenly way to die. you're so right. god. just shoot me now