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#but I haven't posted much art of late so I figured I could post some art from that project over here
chocodile · 6 months
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Some character-based face cards for the Cheat/Bullshit card minigame I programmed for Wishbone. It'll be playable in the next public beta, which I hope to put out at the end of first quarter 2024.
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brightgoat · 3 months
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Hey hi! I’ve been an avid follower of yours for awhile for your Pucci art but, this green child au has me hooked more and more lately! Your art is stunning by the way, thank you for posting!! The final metamorphosis panel has me excited for the next installment you share ngl.
Anyways, I was wondering if I could ask a few things about it? Specifically, what has happened after O-moon came into the picture, and the buildup to part 13 and 14? Of course if you wish to keep things vague or don’t know, there’s no need to answer! I’m just curious.
When did Jotaro get alerted to the incident and decided to finally come around? Did he encounter Pucci first or Jolyne? After the revelations that O-moon revealed to Jolyne, how did her perceptions of her father and Pucci shift? Did Jolyne ever figure out what Pucci was most likely about to do to FF while they were cornered by him? Have you thought about how Weather Report factors into this AU at all (since he’s probably in prison at this point)?
Sorry for the bombardment, and again no pressure to answer these if you don’t wish to!
- Kimera
Greetings! Thank you very much for the compliment, hope the payoff to that comic was satisfying haha
So, I wanna keep things vague with this AU, telling the main story beats through images and short comics- not only cuz I like it that way but also cuz... I haven't decided a lot of the details hahaha-
Answering this via lore dump, hope you like reading, this can be just one of many ways it could've happened:
I imagined that while Pucci and Jolyne were out getting souls, Jotaro was studying whatever is left of Dio's followers, and eventually tracks down Pucci, and travels to the US. Perhaps he finds out Pucci has been tutoring Jolyne from Jolyne's mum (who knows maybe they reconnected).
Oh and yes, Jolyne's mum knows abt Pucci, but of course not who he really is.
During this, Jolyne has awakened the Green Baby and fused with it. Jotaro may even sense that something is wrong through their family psychic bond thing.
Jotaro, realizing Pucci is a step ahead of him by already taking in his own daughter, tracks Pucci down to the church and confronts him there, sparing no time and going straight to beating answers out of him, where's Jolyne, what happened to her, what's your plan etc.
I had this thought, that once Jolyne fuses with the green baby, she inherits a bit of Dio's knowledge, and it helps her realise she's been getting used by Pucci all along. Not only that, she inherits the will to go to Heaven, and it drives her to complete the plan, she's strung along by fate now.
Now obviously she feels betrayed by Pucci, but still sympathetic to him, and rescues him from Jotaro. She's conflicted, she's angry, the only reason both Pucci and Jotaro reached out was because of some bigger-than-her plot, and not because of herself. She doesn't know how much of what Pucci gave her was genuine or because of her use to him.
(had this idea for a scene that right after Jolyne rescues Pucci, all three of them are still in church and Pucci realises she's transformed, he yells for her to stay still so he can get Whitesnake to take whatever's inside her out, but as soon as Whitesnake reaches out, a hand bursts out, he thinks it's Stone Free and suddenly JUMPSCARE O-Moon jumps out at him and the reversed-gravity throws everyone away from her-)
The only friend she has left is FF, and yes she finds out what Pucci did to them, furthering her anger. So she drags FF along with her, they are eachothers' only allies here, and although FF doesn't fully understand what's happening to Jolyne, they'll stay by her side (cue the uhhhh 'oh jolyne gave me so many memories and memories make up my intellect so i owe her yadda yadda-')
Aaaaand as for Weather, yeah mf's still in prison lmao I haven't thought too much about him. I wanted this to focus on Jolyne and Pucci, though if I did turn this AU into an entire actual story, Weather would probably come up at some point. God knows how though lmao-
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serahlink · 6 months
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🚨 EMERGENCY COMMISSIONS OPEN🚨 tw // homeless / some med talk but not much
Reblogs are greatly appreciated!!
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Making a new post to hopefully get some work for my family and I so we have somewhere to stay for tonight, since work has been very slow lately. I'm Link, and I'm a 22-year old artist, and my family and I (me + my father and younger sibling) have been homeless since November 2021. It's a long story. TL;DR version is at the same time, while I was living with a friend and my dad + younger sibling was on the road (he drove a van at the time) he had gotten into a diabetic coma and was fired by his job. Being fired meant he or my sibling didn't exactly have a home to go back to, as our relatives on both sides refused to help. At the same time, I was going to have to find someplace else since my friends grandmother was entering the late stages of her life and they had to transfer her to the nursery, meaning there was a lot of things his family had to take care of and I couldn't be there. They allowed my father, sibling and I to stay there for two weeks to give us time to find someplace else.
While I was there, I'd been doing commissions to help their family out with food, and since it was either the streets or living under a roof; I told my friend to take us to a nearby motel since we had enough for a day, and we could figure things out from there. So since then, I've been keeping us here by doing commissions ever since. Either of us haven't been able to obtain a job yet due to how hard it is for us to get our documents to get an id (we dont have a car at the moment, and saving money for the room and food is already tough as is), but recently we think we might be able to get my father's ID so he can work, were waiting on his lung condition to recover fully and get money saved up for the documents and all that before we apply to get them. So hope isn't fully lost for us, we just need to take care of some things for a while longer until then.
Recently, things have gotten worse again. We were paying weekly thanks to the help from my followers and commissions I was getting, but when we weren't able to pay for another, we went back to paying daily again. And immediately we were set back. For the past few days, we haven't been able to pay for one let alone food. We were able to pay most of it to at least stay here, thanks to the kindness of the staff, but they called us earlier to tell us if we couldn't pay everything tonight, then we'd have to leave. We owe 120 by 11pm tonight, and I thought maybe making a new post might help us since posting on my other socials hasn't done much for us lately.
My commissions are open, and if you're interested in helping us out via a commission you can contact me through my Tumblr dms since it's the easiest way to get to me. But if you can't help financially, which I totally understand, I know the economy is tough on all of us right now, please don't feel bad or anything. Reblogs also help us a ton, and it always means a lot to us.
For the commission info itself, I have it all packed into this link right here, along with examples of my art and prices. I draw mainly fantasy pertaining to the Dragon Age Series and although I know little to nothing about Baulders Gate, I have done some art of tavs before! I also do DnD work as well, so I'm used to drawing pretty unique characters. I'll also put some examples I have below. If you want something outside of that, I'm sure I can provide, just let me know upon your request! And I think that's all. Much love to you and thank you for reading, I hope you have a wonderful day/night :)
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king-krisu · 4 months
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Kinda cringe to do this so late but I've finally had a moment of peace after christmas and I am ALSO feeling soppy and emotional so here goes:
I know every post in this fandom ever has said that this feels so one-of-a-kind and different from any space they've been in before, AND I'M GONNA SAY IT AGAIN! I have never thought of a tag on tumblr as a sort of weird little family where we all exchange ideas and works of art and memes, or ask questions like it's a community notice board. The friends I've made both here and on tiktok mean the world to me, and I'm so grateful we've created such a community here where people are easy to approach and to maybe get to know on a deeper level. Maybe it's the christmas cheer yay but even if we've sometimes disagreed on some stuff, I couldn't care less right now, I've never been part of a more wholesome community than this.
Käärijä, and Jere as a person, has made me so much more confident than ever before, and I've done things I never thought I could bcs of him. I'm so grateful for such a figure like him in our music scene right now, especially a male figure, who doesn't dismiss his queer/female fanbase and does whatever he wants. His message of kindness not only to other people but also to yourself has helped me SO MUCH over this year. I've never talked about this publicly but the night of the ESC finale when I heard people SCREAMING his name, and lyrics in my native language, I started sniffling like a baby from shock. I've never been particularly proud of my roots, but Käärijä has made being and speaking finnish cool, and none of us have ever seen anything like it here.
To all of you who learn our language, take the time to listen to other finnish music, watch finnish media and maybe even visit our country: thank you. We hope it's been fun and even if all of you move on to other esc artists in the next season of it, we are so grateful for this small moment of recognition. Genuinely, we're so happy people appreciate our culture on its own for once <3 we won't ever forget this.
I hope you've all enjoyed my stupid little translation videos/posts, and that they've been helpful/entertaining in any way lol. I'll admit that ever since I made deeper friendships here I haven't been as active, so if I ever miss an anon please just ask again and i'll get to it! I can't wait to meet some of you who are coming here next summer to see Jere, hopefully by then he's seen sense and hired me as an in-house interpretor for all you fäns from ader kantri. And even if you can't travel here or to any of his other shows: i love you all so much <3
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comradekatara · 3 months
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i am very curious about your thoughts on various utena/atla character parallels… every once in a while i see you offhandedly compare like.. korrasami and utenanthy and i’m like HOLD ON this is so true! if you have any further ideas about that i would LOVE to hear them. i honestly don’t know how big the audience is for rgu/atla analysis but i am definitely part of that audience. 😭
yesss i can't believe you're literally the first person to ask me this lately i've been making rgu references on like, every single post i'm shameless!!!!! over the summer i even wrote (like 95% of) an essay comparing sokka and nanami (tldr; they are meat) and i have yet to revisit it (bc i'm scared tbh) but i will post is eventually that is a PROMISE (for an audience of 5 people). also before we go any further my utena blog is @saionjeans and we have fun there. also, i have some utena/atla crossover art here and here, so check that out if you haven't already. the rest of this post will be scattered thoughts because my nanami-sokka essay will be doing a lot of the in-depth analytical work and i don't need to rehash that all now. but also, because i have never not once in my life heard of brevity, i did write a bunch of mini essays anyway, because of course i did.
korrasami and utenanthy: love and abuse
i compared utenanthy to korrasami a couple times, most notably in this post where i talk about how meaningful their relationship is despite being (arguably) underdeveloped, and then in the tags i still have to acknowledge that utena and anthy nonetheless did it better 17 years prior. but i do think that there is so much to be said for utena-korra and anthy-asami as two young women who are both set up to be "special" but in a way that denies and restricts them from their own humanity, cloistering them away from the outside world and making them more vulnerable to abuse. i talked pretty recently about how asami's abuse is really shrugged under the carpet in a way that pisses me off if i think about it for too long. rgu does such an incredible job of gradually exposing that abuse and its effects on society, not as a deviation from the norm (of the nuclear family, of the romance, of the school, etc.) but in fact a common symptom of it. lok does not critique the nuclear family in any meaningful way despite setting up so many different areas through which such a critique could be facilitated (made worse by the fact that atla sets such a fantastic precedent). but anyway, enough about lok (and how she disappoints me).
2. miki & kozue and katara & sokka: siblings and memory
in my sokka-nanami essay i talk about how various characters can be read to embody various analogues, but how my focus in that essay is primarily to draw a parallel between sokka and nanami by using the framework for gender/patriarchal logic rgu establishes. however, i also talk about how azula can be read as a nanami (or even an anthy) figure, as well as how katara and sokka can be read as miki and kozue (katara = miki and sokka = kozue, obviously) (and note that kozue and nanami are significant foils/mirrors too). i mean, they even have a similar light blue (to signify naïveté, innocence, childlike wonder) versus dark blue (to signify cynicism, jadedness, resigned subsumption into harmful norms) color scheme going on. the Special sibling and the afterthought. (although before going forward i do want to be clear that i am in no way alluding to any incestuous undertones wrt katara and sokka, and i would even argue that the allusions to incestuous desire between miki and kozue are more complex and nuanced than simply reducing it to mere perversion. but that's beyond the scope of this ask lol)
i know that some people might bristle at my comparing katara to miki (baby misogynist, little freak) but miki really exemplifies the trope of the "sunlit garden" in the same way that katara exemplifies that trope in atla. miki isn't the narrator of course (akio is), but the central motif of desire staked to an illusory formative memory since lost that defines a character's motivations and self-becoming is first properly introduced (not including the utena meeting dios intro) and defined through his obsession. in the same way, we are introduced to the world of atla through katara's formative memories, her desire that motivates her self-becoming also being an illusory formative memory, as well as a tale she longs to replicate ("the four nations living together in harmony"). katara, like miki, is defined by her naïveté and childlike innocence, her somewhat reductive desire to be noble and heroic, and her need to flatten everything into a clear-cut narrative wherein she is always its heroine. like miki, she resents her sibling for being transformed into a more cynical version of themselves in accordance with society's pressures (in kozue's case, it's the inescapability of patriarchy, whereas in sokka's case, it's... a lot of things), and longs for a time when they were "truly happy" and playing together (playing piano, playing in the snow, you get it).
both kozue and sokka heavily subscribe to patriarchal logic and comport and reduce themselves in accordance with the dictums of a world they consider truly inescapable. kozue seeks power within her limited frame, whereas sokka only seeks power insofar as it allows him to assume his very narrow role of protector, but they both assume those limitations to be ontological and fixed in a way that does not allow them to see past it. however, the lack of empathy both miki and katara refuse to attempt in understanding their worldviews, in no way making an effort to broach that misunderstanding instead of simply letting the chasm between them fester, nonetheless implicates them equally. after all, they too both adhere to their own limited worldviews, only in their worldviews they are fundamentally special and thus beyond reproach. sokka and kozue are both integral aspects of katara and miki's sunlit gardens, and their idealized return to a picturesque nostalgia involves a transformation (or regression) of sokka and kozue into their more innocent former selves. and sokka and kozue are in turn obsessed with katara and miki, the central figure around which their identity and actions revolve.
through this framework, aang thus becomes katara's anthy (aangthy, hehe), as the embodiment of katara's hopeful/nostalgic ideal of heroism, companionship, and the idealized promise of a distant irretrievable past. like anthy with kozue, aang "replaces" katara's longing for the softer, more innocent version of her brother with aang's friendship. like miki with anthy, katara possesses romantic feelings for aang despite his functioning as a replacement for sokka before he became a shell of his former self (or kozue before she became... sexually active). this is because katara, like miki, idealizes the patriarchal narratives that dictate that all significant relationships be either romantic or familial (or both). she wholeheartedly subscribes to this notion, hence why she attempts to subsume everyone who can meaningfully fit into her narrative framework as either a lover (aang, haru, jet, zuko for all of 2 seconds) or a pseudo family member (aunt wu, hama, pakku, toph, etc etc.), replicating those dynamics as many times as she needs to to make them fit within her two dimensional tapestry. and crucially, coming face to face with yon rha subverts that, because she recognizes the messy humanity spilling forth from the neat boxes she puts people in, and must thus contend with her own role in her narrative. of course miki, being a side character and not the narrator, certainly not the hero, does not get this luxury. and he must find a way to grow up anyway.
3. akio and ozai: patriarchy
there's something truly incredible about how both akio and ozai manage to inflict psychological harm upon every single character in their respective shows, even if they never interact with those characters directly. their reach is vast and spindly; it cannot be overestimated. and yet, ozai has only reigned for about six years. akio is only acting chairman of ohtori academy. they are not patriarchy itself, but merely its signifier. and obviously their modes of embodying patriarchy differ in many respects: a school is not a nation (despite the similarities), and a father is not a brother (despite akio being father-like). ozai is defeated by by being stripped of his technology of violence, whereas akio is not "defeated" in a literal sense (although i suppose anthy driving a car through his ghost and exploding him into a cloud of roses does make quite the statement), anthy merely leaves. and yet, in both instances, they are both forced to succumb to their own limited ideology regarding what constitutes power. if ozai lacks firepower, he lacks control over his subjects and the right to sovereignty. if akio's control is challenged, if people realize that they can just leave, that the ends of his world are entirely arbitrary, he no longer has the power to abuse and exploit and use others for his own ends.
the metonymic signification of patriarchy figured through both ozai and akio in dual ways further emphasizes their respective roles. ozai is both king and father, akio is both (acting) chairman and (acting) father. patriarchy dictates every aspect of [a patriarchal] society: from interpersonal dynamics to the nuclear family to the school to the state to the world. what makes both akio and ozai so brilliant in this regard is the fact that their influence is reflected in all these facets. ozai abuses every member of his family individually; controls them as a system; inflicts his (family's) propaganda onto the fn education system, rewriting history with (almost) no one to disprove him; inflicts his imperialist agenda both within the fire nation (ruining local economies through industrialization, forcing citizens to conform to restrictive roles, inflicting violence through occupation) and beyond it; he refers to the world as "my world," as if he is its creator, its owner, or its god. and in many ways, he is. akio similarly abuses everyone interpersonally (most notably anthy, touga, and utena); subsumes utena into his nuclear family system so that she cannot leave; uses the academy as a site of control in which adolescents are forced to comply with socially codified norms and thus made more vulnerable to the influence of adult authority figures (especially those who emphasize their individuality or inherent specialness when compared with the rest of the student body); operates ohtori as a sort of nation wherein patriotism is reified through the use of uniforms, affiliations, sociopolitical hierarchies, and an acting government (the student council); and defines himself as the creator/owner/god of his world. to be end of the world. to embody not an apocalypse, but a cage.
ozai and akio both fashion themselves the entire world, but it also makes them more vulnerable to resistance, to any mode of critique that points out the obvious: no, you're just one person, and the logic you use to dominate others is deeply, noticeably flawed. it's a logic that they exploit but that in turns exploits them, as they have so deeply internalized it that they can no longer immunize themselves against any kind of resistance. ozai claims that there is no room for an air nomad in his world, which is why aang defeating ozai through the pacifist values of his people and not through his greater power (which would nonetheless be subscribing to ozai's logic, and thus letting him win ideologically if not physically) is so crucial in shattering ozai's paradigm. just as utena, as someone who refuses to conform to the strict, arbitrary, and violently enforced norms of patriarchy, can so thoroughly disrupt akio's control by resisting him. just as anthy can by leaving. akio remains in his cozy little coffin, exerting meaningless control to uphold the hollow puppet of his ego.
people sometimes joke about how long it takes for zuko to recognize that the burning off of half his face was "cruel" and "wrong," but it's not that zuko didn't find it painful, it's not that zuko didn't fear his father, it's not that zuko idolized his father beyond reproach. he questioned his cruelty, in fact he did so constantly. he simply saw no other way to live. he had no conception of a world beyond ozai's defined limits, had no choice but to believe ozai's dogma and loathe himself for not sufficiently adhering to it. similarly, people often ask "if anthy could leave all along, then why didn't she?" because she, too, was trapped in a coffin of her own self-loathing. to leave an abuser is not as simple as simply stepping beyond the threshold and never looking back. first, you must locate the threshold. then, you must find the courage to look beyond it. i briefly touched on azula being an anthy figure before. well, i think that she is. just because she has yet to see beyond the threshold does not mean she does not find her limits. and yes, its not triumphant, and yes, her facade that masks her pain and fear is shattered, but ultimately, that breakdown is a good thing for her. because that's her first step to freedom.
4. the sunlit garden as mythmaking events
i talk previously in this post about the motif of "the sunlit garden" in rgu vs what i like to call "a mythmaking event" in atla, and i do want to elaborate on that slightly. i provided a link to a post on my utena blog going into what the sunlit garden "is" for each principal character, and atla has a similar mode of communicating these nostalgic desires and idealizations that motivate self-becoming, largely through flashbacks. for aang, it is quite obvious, as his memories of a before and after are (temporally, although not psychologically) fragmented by an entire century. that disconnect severs the two versions of himself quite neatly. those memories with gyatso and the other air nomads (as well as with child bumi, and with the mysterious kuzon) are his idealized past, his "sunlit garden," whereas the storm is his mythmaking event, the point in his life where his choices collide with his telos. there is no going back.
katara and sokka have a similar sunlit garden, their snowball fight being the last truly happy memory they have before the black snow falls and their childhood innocence is severed from them forever. kya's sacrifice and murder is katara's mythmaking event as she then chooses to assume the mantle of her mother who took her place, decides to become the greatest waterbender possible to compensate for surviving the genocide, and chooses to be a hero so that the collective memory and sacrifices of her people will not be in vain. like utena, she witnesses pain and suffering at a very young aged and is moved to become a hero so as to mitigate that suffering, even if her own formative tragedy can never be rectified. also like utena, she idealizes a seemingly utopian past wherein violence was more covert and thus presented itself as more ideal (the time of princes vs the time of harmony). her naïveté and persistent idealism are both her downfall and her greatest virtue. she refuses to accept the true state of the world to the point of blindness, but it is also that refusal to accept it that allows her to force the world into a kinder shape.
as for sokka, his mother's death was also a formative trauma, but his true mythmaking event is when hakoda leaves for war with all the other men of his tribe. hakoda tells him that "being a man is knowing where you're needed the most, and right now, that's here, protecting your sister." it's not a rose crest ring, but it may as well be. from that moment onward, sokka officially comports his identity into being his sister's protector, which is how he thus defines his manhood. and of course, being his sister's protector means being a martyr, because the precedent for "protecting katara" that has already been established is, well, dying for her. like aang being the avatar and the last airbender and katara being the last southern waterbender, sokka is thus defined by his necessity (ie, usefulness to others) as well as his isolation – not only the "last warrior/man" of the swt, but also via his own process of depersonalization and self-dehumanization as he attempts to fully embody his role as an eventual martyr.
zuko's mythmaking event is, of course, branded onto his face. in fact, zuko essentially assumes both katara and sokka's mythmaking events by first being irrevocably altered by his mother's sacrifice, and then being all the more transformed by his father's decree as he attempts to dictate what kind of man zuko needs to be. his "sunlit garden" is also shown to us in flashes: memories of a (literal!) sunlit garden, of turtleducks, of his mother's gentle guidance, of happier times on ember island, on his father's hand resting on his shoulder with pride instead of malice. it is unclear just how truthful these nostalgic memories are. obviously, his family was never actually happy. ozai had always been exerting control over them, even if his violence was once more obscured. we never see azula's sunlit garden, for instance (although i'd argue that she and zuko possess the same mythmaking events), and i cannot help but wonder whether it's because, like touga, she never actually had one.
finally, some honorable mentions must go to the following: toph, whose sunlit garden is also her mythmaking event, as she learns from badgermoles how to hone her gift and reject the rigid societal impositions that seek to limit, repress, and control her. hama, who never attempts to return to her sunlit garden in the swt with kanna, despite her freedom as established in her mythmaking event of teaching herself to bloodbend; she knows that she is irrevocably altered, and thus she can never go home again. appa, whose sunlit garden, of playing with the other bison at the southern air temple, occurs in conjunction with his mythmaking event of meeting aang and becoming the avatar's animal companion.
all of these events are depicted through flashbacks wherein the consecutive shots between flashback and present day mirror the character who is having the memory in the past and present, overlaying their younger face onto their current face with identical framing. i'm too lazy to compile a bunch of screenshots here, and i couldn't find the post i'd seen previously that had done so, but if you're as familiar with atla as i am, then you already know exactly what i'm talking about. this device is so effective particularly because it exercises restraint. every flashback in atla is crucial because it signifies either a sunlit garden or a mythmaking event that motivates the character its focalizing in the present day. atla is economical with its flashbacks, but not withholding. like with rgu, flashbacks in atla are used with a specificity of purpose, and illustrate their points in clear, precise ways. just because atla is not as overtly metatextual with its central themes of narrativization, nostalgia, idealization, bias, and storytelling, does not mean it is not present, and in fact, overt. ranging from katara's role as narrator to the fire nation propaganda aang attempts to correct in school, the use of memory and illusion is crucial in illustrating how atla functions as a narrative about heroism, legacy, and challenging dominant myths through preserving cultural memory under an imperialist regime.
5. final thoughts
obviously, i could go on forever. there is simply no limit to my ability to unpack and dissect these two shows (hence, my sideblogs dedicated to doing so). i haven't even talked about zuko as an analogue to saionji with regard to their latent homosexuality, misogyny, violence, and struggle to conform to a patriarchal ideal. and i barely touch on katara as an analogue to utena with regard to their naïveté, heroism, myopia, persistence, and somewhat misguided desire for justice (through her terms specifically), although like kozue and nanami as mirrors wrt sokka, her traits that i describe when comparing her to miki also map onto utena in many ways – except of course, utena, unlike miki, is also the "hero," and thus has the same destabilizing revelation regarding the banality of evil that katara undergoes in "the southern raiders." moreover, i only discuss one central motif in utena, because i think the sunlit garden is the trope that maps best onto the thematic work atla is doing, but i'm sure that there are many more frameworks i could compare. and yet, i only have so much time, and only so much space in which to ramble. so hopefully, for now, this suffices. however, if there any specific areas in which you would like me to elaborate, you know that i shall always be happy to do so.
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r2kisblog · 1 month
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Coffeetalk
Something that needs to be addressed:
I haven't posted many drawings lately, and when I did, it's often simple drawings or sketches. To be honest, I'm keeping a lot to myself, I'm actually drawing quite a lot, but I'm not really in the mood to show everything on socialmedia because,..
..I am learning to draw for myself...
It might sound super strange but I'm realizing how social media has actually ruined my love for drawing.
Imagine constantly trying to draw something that could get a lot of likes, following trends because other artists are doing it too and gives you attention, putting yourself under pressure because you think your followers will leave if you don't post regularly and if you don't post the content they want to see.
Constantly comparing yourself to others to the point that it becomes super toxic and unhealthy for yourself.
As soon you start to focus on specific fandoms and you grow, all of these influences you a lot and you'll come to a point where you feel deeply burnt after every art you finish only for the sake of posting...
And then, you start unintentionally paying attention to the numbers. You constantly check if your post is a hit or not. You become disappointed when it does not reach your expectation. You are finding yourself checking on your phone, checking and checking...And then it becomes at some point a never-ending cycling...
It doesn't matter if it's the likes or the followers. In the end, it becomes an unhealthy obsession and the worst thing about it is,..
..that YOU DON'T REALIZE IT, until your love for your hobby becomes more of an hate and you start question yourself, why are you even doing this. It makes you sick....
..So much that you completely forget why you started painting in the first place. The moment I realized it burnt me, was the moment when I deleted my accounts and took a longer break. I disconnected pretty much with the things that brought me this kind of beeing "burnt." I stopped talking with some people, disconnected myself from social media, and started the process of healing. After a while i made a fresh new account, and while i had the new account i still found myself beeing trapped in the thinking " i need to be seen in social media or else what is the point of having an account " , " i need fast something that interest me hard so i can get into drawing again" " maybe i should enter a very large fandom, maybe this is gonna work for me "...
As soon as i realized the trap was here again, i moved again away from social media. This time, without deleting my Accounts, but rather taking my time trying to figure out what was the reason in the first place that i started to draw a lot, with the intention of improving. Honestly, after many, many months, i am still searching for an answer..and that's fine! It's telling me that i don't need to force myself to like something i am not interested in and giving myself just a lot of time until something truly interest me.
Right now i do not feel the need to post much on social media, the numbers don't do anything to me anymore because i realized in the end these are only numbers...
I see more people using the advantage of AI Tools to fool people for the sake of getting a lot of likes. I also see artists who suddenly trace or heavily refrencing other people art without credit for the sake of likes or to be seen by the people. Honestly, is this really making you happy? That's what I question myself every time I see people do this. 😥
All of this made me think that my long break is truly healing me, and i get my love for art back again. Slowly liking the little drawings i do truly for myself, without thinking if others might like it or not. And taking time finding the answer, what made me start to do art in the first place and what i want to aim. And not forcing myself to draw for fandoms, I truly don't want to do it for the sake of numbers.
If you read this and you might be in a similar situation 🤲..
no matter if you draw, write, or do anything else, your art will always matter because you put your dedication and love to something you truly love. And there will always be people appreciating what you're create but your priority should be always yourself . It is your creation you truly care for that will give you a smile which thousands numbers will not do the same. Never force yourself doing the things you don't fully enjoy.
Always do a break whenever you need it!
( English is not my native language I apologize for mistakes in advance)
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born-to-lose · 2 years
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Never Stopped Loving You
Pairing: current!Slash x fem!reader
Requested by @being-worthy
Summary: You and Slash get hate from the media because of the age difference in your relationship, so he has to make a hard decision...
Tags: breakup, angst with happy ending, age gap
Words: 1,417
A/N: I know I haven't posted fics in ages and this is one of my first attempts at writing since June, so I'm even prouder of myself that it turned out so long. Also, count this as one of the belated annual coping fics.
Tag list: @warriorteam1924 @slashscowboyboots @losers-yurio @lost-in-the-80s @yoshidas-girl-forever @jennyggggrrr @tuffduff @jonesyownsmyheart @rhyetaylor62 @smells-like-perfect-senses @whered0wego @rumoured-whispers @stradlin-cold-heartbreaker @aggressive-slytherin @cherry-jams
Tip me if you want!
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You never would have thought you would meet Slash at an opening night for an art gallery somewhere in California, but what was even more surreal was that he was the one who started talking to you.
"Are you one of the artists?"
You turned to look at him and smiled, shaking your head. "No, but one of my friend's artworks is exhibited here. She's somewhere…" you looked around, gesturing to the staircase. "Somewhere over there probably."
He chuckled lightly. "That's cool! I'm Slash, by the way."
Slash offered you his hand and you shook it. "Nice to meet you, I'm (y/n)."
You had no idea how, but your conversation didn't end there and you kept talking and talking until he called you a taxi as it got late and your friend was nowhere to be found. But not before he gave you his number with the words "Feel free to call me sometime if you like".
That's how it all started and at some point, you were dating. Neither of you ever really made it public, you just went out together and left it to people to figure it out themselves. At the beginning, there were some worries about your age difference, but you were both happy and his children liked you too, so why should you let something small like this get in your way?
Of course, your relationship was good fodder for the media. Headlines on tabloids like "Slash dates someone who could be his daughter" or "Who is the girl dating the rockstar 30 years her senior?" were not uncommon. What was worse than this, though, were the nasty comments on social media and the speculations that you were just after him for his money and fame.
What they didn't seem to realize was that neither you nor Slash posted any couple photos, which you definitely would have if you had really wanted to become famous as Slash's girlfriend. All they had was photos of the two of you shot by paparazzi in public and the name of your private Instagram account, which was on account of some dedicated fan who went through his entire following list and compared profile photos to the blurry pictures of you which could be found on any celebrity gossip website now.
Then again, you were not the only one who got hate. More than a few people called Slash a creep and a predator for dating somebody this young. However, this didn't seem to bother him much as you were in your late twenties and thus an independent, consenting adult who had already built up a life. He was more upset about the comments about you, calling you a gold digger, a whore and whatnot.
However, after a couple of months of pure bliss - aside from all the hate from outsiders - Slash made a hard decision.
"So this is the end?" you asked, a lump in your throat as you attempted to hold back the tears.
He sighed, his voice shaking as he replied, "Believe me, it wasn't easy for me to make up my mind at all, but… you know I only want the best for you and I can't keep watching you getting your reputation ruined just because you're dating me. You deserve so much better than this."
You really wanted him to stay, but at that moment you weren't able to come up with arguments why he should rethink that decision. Your mind was all over the place and you were too busy crying to comprehend everything else he said.
Slash held you in his arms, staying silent because he had no idea how to save this situation when he was the one who ruined it in the first place.
You understood where he was coming from and it was more or less inevitable that this day was going to come sooner than you would have liked, but that didn't make it hurt any less.
But as time passed and you reconsidered everything that had happened, you were beginning to question if the critics really were the only reason why he left you. After all, he had never said those three words to you. Admittedly, your relationship was less based on words than on actions, but you would have liked to hear him explicitly say he loved you too from time to time. Perhaps some of your friends were right when they had asked you if you were sure it was a good idea to date someone 30 years older than you - and a famous musician at that.
One night, shortly after you got home from work, your phone rang without you expecting a call from anyone. Still, you answered it and you stopped breathing as you heard a familiar voice you hadn't heard in five months.
"Hey, it's me, Slash. I… would like to talk if you have time. Can you come over? I don't want to have this conversation on the phone."
There was a short pause before you murmured, "Yeah, I'm on my way. See you."
It was pretty late and you wondered why he would want to talk to you right now, but what would it hurt to come see him just this once?
He didn't live too far away from you, so you arrived at his house in less than 10 minutes. Slash already opened the door when he heard your car stop and he was biting his lip as he watched you walking towards him. "Please come in," he said quietly and you followed him inside.
The two of you walked into the corridor and then the living room, sitting down on the couch. You had almost forgotten how much you had missed this place.
Before he started, he took a deep breath and told you what was on his mind without further ado.
"I never stopped loving you. That's why I only called you now. I thought I could get over you if I kept some distance so I could forget about my feelings for you, but I couldn't. There hasn't been a day that I didn't regret breaking up with you. I just thought it's for the best because I hated how everyone made you look like the villain. I've heard a lot of shit being talked about me, I don't care about what they say anymore. But you… you always said it doesn't bother you but I could tell it did-"
You blinked in confusion, processing everything he had said so far, before interrupting him. "Wait, what? No, it really didn't bother me as long as we were together. I knew what I signed up for and I knew we would get hate from people, but we agreed that we wouldn't let something like this come between us."
There was a pause during which Slash was clearly trying to think of what to say. As you briefly looked around, a framed photo of you and Slash on the wall caught your eye and you bit your lip, looking back at him. "You never stopped loving me?"
"Yeah… I feel stupid now for breaking up with you over this and I don't even expect you to give me another chance, but I would be really grateful if you could. I swear I won't let you go so easily this time."
His teary eyes told you that he really meant what he said. Thinking about how to respond, you kept still for a moment.
Sure, the breakup hurt, but why else, if he didn't genuinely want you back, would he have called you to have this talk now after five months had passed? There hadn't been any problems in your relationship besides the media, so why shouldn't you try again? Some may say it won't work out this time if it already hadn't in the past, but you'll never know if you don't try.
"To be honest… I still love you too," you confessed. "And I think we should try again, but please promise that this time we really won't let some haters get between us, okay?"
Obviously relieved, he smiled and nodded. "I promise. Thank you for giving me another chance."
Softly returning the smile, you opened your arms to wrap him into a hug and rested your chin on his shoulder. A part of you wanted to say something, but you would have enough time to talk with him later now that you were together again, so you remained quiet and hugged him tighter.
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babbybones · 2 months
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Oekaki updatez...
Monster Kidz Oekaki is still up and i'd like to keep it that way, but i need to give it some more attention and keep people updated on what's going on/what my plans are for it. so let me jot some thoughts down...
data scraping for machine learning: this has been a concern for a lot of artists as of late, so I've added a robots.txt file and an ai.txt file (as per the opt-out standard proposed by Spawning.ai) to the site in an effort to keep out as many web crawlers for AI as possible. the site will still be indexed by search engines and the Internet Archive. as an additional measure, later tonight I'll try adding "noai", "noimageai", and "noml" HTML meta tags to the site (this would probably be quick and easy to do but i'm soooo sleepy 🛌)
enabling uploads: right now, most users can only post art by drawing in one of the oekaki applets in the browser. i've already given this some thought for a while now, but it seems like artist-oriented spaces online have been dwindling lately, so i'd like to give upload privileges to anyone who's already made a drawing on the oekaki and make a google form for those who haven't (just to confirm who you are/that you won't use the feature maliciously). i would probably set some ground rules like "don't spam uploads"
rules: i'd like to make the rules a little less anal. like, ok, it's no skin off my ass if some kid draws freddy fazbear even though i hope scott cawthon's whole empire explodes. i should also add rules pertaining to uploads, which means i'm probably going to have to address AI generated content. on one hand i hate how, say, deviantart's front page is loaded with bland, tacky, "trending on artstation"-ass AI generated shit (among other issues i have with the medium) but on the other hand i have no interest in trying to interrogate someone about whether they're a Real Artist or scream at someone with the rage of 1,000 scorned concept artists for referencing an AI generated image someone else posted, or something. so i'm not sure how to tackle this tastefully
"Branding": i'm wondering if i should present this as less of a UTDR Oekaki and more of a General Purpose Oekaki with a monster theming. functionally, there wouldn't be much of a difference, but maybe the oekaki could have its own mascot
fun stuff: is having a poll sort of "obsolete" now because of tumblr polls, or should I keep it...? i'd also like to come up with ideas for Things To Do like weekly/monthly art prompts, or maybe games/events like a splatfest/artfight type thing. if you have any ideas of your own, let me know
boring stuff: i need to figure out how to set up automated backups, so i guess i'll do that sometime soon... i should also update the oekaki software sometime (this is scary because i've made a lot of custom edits to everything)
Money: well this costs money to host so I might put a ko-fi link for donations somewhere... at some point... maybe.......
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evelhak · 3 months
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It's a bit late because it took me a while to figure out what I wanted to post about, but here are my
Fandom Wishes for the New Year
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Disclaimer: these are purposefully written in a way that might evoke difficult feelings in people. If you're not in a good headspace for being self-critical, it might be better not to read this list right now. None of these points were inspired by a particular person, so if you feel like you recognise yourself in some of them, and you're in my circles, it was not a message directed at you, and doesn't imply that I have any negative feelings towards you. These are all based on general human nature, and I'm only pointing that out because I know social anxiety is pretty common among Tumblr users, and I want to reassure you that this is not secretly about you personally.
A little introduction note:
If any of these wishes spark feelings of resistance or defensiveness in you, I wish that you would not disregard them, because it's likely that the points that cause those feelings are the exact ones you would benefit from working on.
This is not from me to fandom as if I know everything and do things correctly. I am part of fandom and these are as much from me to me as they can be from you to you, if you want. God knows I know which ones here I need to work on right now, and there are probably things I haven't even noticed.
I wrote these things because so many of us spend a lot of the year criticising other people in fandom and talking about the stuff we don't like seeing in it, or affirming that the things we like to do in fandom are valuable, (which are important discussions) but it's not as common to see visible attempts to work on ourselves, to recognise what we could personally do better ourselves to make fandom a better place for everyone.
This is for that purpose. Because pointing fingers is so much easier than looking in the mirror. Because there is no one in fandom who does everything right or everything wrong. We can always do better and a very small improvement can send out big waves.
If you start reading this list just to affirm yourself that you're already doing enough in regards to all of these things, please come back later.
If while reading this list, you notice yourself focusing on how you know people who would benefit from thinking about any of these things, please come back later.
This is not for congratulating yourself or judging anyone else. This is intended as a self-development tool. If you can't first (and continuously) face yourself with genuine humility, your opinions about other people are not going promote genuine acceptance and cooperation because even if you're right about something you're placing yourself above others, not as one of them.
This is not a feel-good list. Growth is painful and everyone has fragile points in their ego.
This is also not an "everything is wrong here" declaration. This list is an attempt to point out things that can help when things go wrong, but it is also intended to help before things go wrong.
Please, remember that finding things you could work on, does not mean that you aren't already a valued and loved participant in fandom.
I also think it might be helpful to make sure you're not distracted or in a vulnerable state before you go on.
Thank you for sharing fandom and I hope you can find something useful here.
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Fandom Wishes
for anyone it may concern
🌱 May you seek connection with someone you have negative feelings towards and work to get past those feelings in yourself
🌱 May you appreciate any work for what it is instead of complaining about what it isn't
🌱 May you engage with a format or genre of fic/art that makes you feel difficult feelings for one reason or another
🌱 May you fall in love with an idea you used to despise
🌱 May you give a genuine compliment to someone you are envious of
🌱 May you engage with a side of fandom in direct opposition to yours with true, instead of performed respect
🌱 May you remember that truly objective interpretation of a work does not exist (no, not even "the literal" one)
🌱 May you rejoice in being one of the many
🌱 May you find freedom in being one of the few
🌱 May you suspend your disbelief when you have a "vampires don't sparkle" type of moment
🌱 May your love be stronger than your pride when receiving constructive criticism (directly or indirectly)
🌱 May you find joy in genuinely appreciating a headcanon or other take that directly contradicts yours
🌱 May you find gold in imperfections
🌱 May you learn from people you feel aren't as smart as you
🌱 May you not punish people you feel are smarter than you, for being human
🌱 May you look beyond the presentation of something to appreciate its core and meaning
🌱 May you catch yourself when you're about to engage in "Be yourself -no, not like that" type of behaviour
🌱 May you take a step back before responding in anger
🌱 May you stop yourself from using freedom of expression as an excuse to be mean or uncaring
🌱 May you stop yourself from guilt tripping people to engage with your work
🌱 May you resist the urge to correct someone who is having harmless fun while not caring about facts
🌱 May you resist the urge to share unsolicited advice on someone's vent post
🌱 May you give more unprompted compliments
🌱 May you engage in more collaborative work in any way you could find meaning in
🌱 May you jump into the unknown and do the things you secretly regret missing the opportunities for
🌱 May you talk your issues out in private when you feel the urge to vague-post about someone you know on Tumblr
🌱 May you refrain from deciding "they're idiots" when you spot a trend you don't like, and dig into fandom history to find out why the trend exists instead
�� May you remember that acknowledging that you are mean, judgemental or too critical of others doesn't give you a free pass to continue to do so
🌱 May you win over your shyness, insecurities or fear of being part of something in case you get hurt
🌱 May you do the things you tell yourself don't matter, to make yourself feel better about not doing them
🌱 May you accept that you don't own your interests, and seek connection instead of withdrawing from others
🌱 May you remember that bigger, higher, more, different, unique, scientific, objective, eloquent, detailed, layered, stronger, etc. are not things that inherently make something more valuable than another thing
🌱 May you find good things about characters you dislike
🌱 May you find depth in characters you didn't think had any, possibly with the help of someone particularly interested in the character
🌱 May you learn to ask "Why would the author do this?" in curiosity instead of anger
🌱 May you notice when your initially valid criticism of a popular trend turns to illogical hate
🌱 May you notice when your initially valid criticism of a niche turns to ignorance
🌱 May you create something about an element in canon or fanon that you have deemed unimportant
🌱 May you internalise the idea that curating your online experience includes expanding it sometimes
🌱 May you engage in something silly if you gravitate towards serious content
🌱 May you engage in something heavier if you gravitate towards light-hearted content
🌱 May you remember that your appreciation of someone's creations should not come with strings attached
🌱 May you look for new and unrecognised fan creations and uplift them to keep fandom striving
🌱 May your "Where did you come from?" reaction to new people in fandom be filled with love and curiosity instead of suspicion and exclusion
🌱 May you understand that someone else's success is not the reason for your feelings of failure
🌱 May you remember that putting others down does not elevate you
🌱 May you understand that someone not needing what you wish to give is not about you
🌱 May you recognise the difference between feeling threatened by someone because of them and because of you
🌱 May you remember that the pursuit of objective truth is not valuable in all fandom activities
🌱 May you understand that someone moving on to a new interest or new fandom is not a betrayal of you
🌱 May you accept that sometimes you have to confront the difficult things in fandom and yourself, and it's not because you shouldn't have fun, it's so you can keep having fun
🌱 May you understand that freedom of expression doesn't mean lack of consequences
🌱 May you consider that offence may not be the best defence when you're dealing with people you share a valuable interest with
🌱 May you remember that feeling sorry for yourself because you made a mistake and withdrawing because of your guilt is not helping anyone
🌱 May you accept that you are going to leave a footprint in fandom no matter how insignificant you think you are, so your actions matter for better and worse
🌱 May you show more active curiousity towards people's creations instead of sitting back and waiting for what they post next
🌱 If you want to see something, an idea, a change, anything, be the first to do it or suggest it
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End note:
If any of the points listed make you go "But-" "What about-" "This doesn't apply to me because-", please stop. The purpose of these wishes is not to apply them to every situation you can think of. For example, to engage with a person you have negative feelings about does not imply you should engage with a person who has been abusive to you. It only means it's your job to find where it applies for you, where can you, in particular, work on your prejudices against people and be more open to others.
If you are reading any of these wishes from the point of view of "cases in which these things would not apply" you're willingly misinterpreting them. They are meant to be viewed from the perspective of "cases in which these things could be helpful and applicable to me personally".
None of these wishes are implying that criticism is bad or that you shouldn't have preferences. Neither are any of them implying that you should abandon something in case someone gets upset, or that you're not allowed to have fun or express yourself in your own way. Not all of these wishes are intended to be equally meaningful to every person. We all have different weaknesses and different points of growth.
These wishes are simply prompts you can use to find those personal instances in which you specifically could be kinder, more open, more humble, more fair, more responsible and more welcoming towards your community.
It's so common to hear "you don't owe anything to anyone". No, you don't owe these things to anyone. There's no law or rule that forces you to work on yourself to create a healthier community. But every time I hear this type of thinking, I can't help but think: Wouldn't you want to, though? Wouldn't you want to do things for everyone, not out of obligation, but out of love instead? Wouldn't you want to go the extra mile for someone else if you could, even if they couldn't?
I know I do. That's why, every time I find myself feeling unhappy, insecure, hateful, jealous, dismissive, misunderstood, lonely, bitter, resentful, scared, hurt, or discouraged, I'm going to come back to this list, or anything that has a similar effect, and I'm going to figure out what I can do to fix things.
No matter how good or bad your last year in fandom was, I hope that this one is going to be better. These are just some things to encourage it. ✨
Please, consider reblogging this for other people. 💙
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citrus-cactus · 4 months
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Howdy, all! I can't post my art summary quite yet because it contains part of someone's Secret Santa gift, so I thought I would fill out the fic summary template created by @reliablejoukido (see her original post here!). Even though I didn't publish (or finish!) much, I did start writing again this year, and that feels like a huge accomplishment, so it seemed like it would be fun to look back and talk a little bit about what I have in the works.
First, the finished fic!
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My er... grand return to writing (I wouldn't call it that, but I did have a lot of fun writing and drawing for it, even if it took 6+ months from start to finish ^^;). I love these three characters as a trio so much. It was really hard to pull out a quote I liked and have it make sense in context, so I put the summary in there... but since I brought it up in another post, I thought I'd share what one of my editing drafts looks like:
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(ok, so maybe not the tiniest font imaginable, but sometimes there are cross-outs to the cross-outs and sometimes I DO run out of room near troublesome paragraphs and in the margins!)
Now, onto WIPs!
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Hmm, well! That sure is a title, isn't it? ;) I wanted to write Junzumi and came up with this idea late last year, and finally started trying to figure it out. It's meant to be fun and flirty and a bit awkward, but the ultimate goal is to be kind to JP, because he (and his body) are given so little love overall. And even though JP and Zoe are not actually hooking up in this fic, it is meant to show the relationship between the two of them in college, and how they could start going from friendship to dating. There IS nudity, but it's meant to be tasteful and respectful, I promise!
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Oof. I haven't forgotten this fic, I swear (even though I published Chapter 4 three years ago!). I got really excited to work on it earlier this year (flush with success from actually publishing something, rotfl!) and then let it continue to languish (orz). Upon reflection, the reason it's been stalled is I was having a hard time figuring out the flow of action, but after re-outlining it in September I think I know now what Maki needs to be doing in order to experience the emotions I always meant her to be feeling in this chapter. And yes, she and Meiko meet (yay!).
Chapter 6 has been done for YEARS, and Chapter 7's probably pretty close to done as well, so it really is just this chapter being the hold-up.
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AKA, Garg Fic #1. Been mulling over ideas for fic for this fandom all summer, and finally decided to write one based on some minor characters from the SLG comics (that I didn't even read, and can't read now because they're out of print). But I AM reading the new Dark Ages comics, and I'm proving to be a really good guesser about certain details, so actually, I feel INCREDIBLY validated about my original vision and characterization, ahaha.
As you may be able to tell from the quote selection, this is not a happy story. But I believe it's a story worth telling. It's about preserving customs in the face of tragedy, and mourning, and extinction, and love.
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AKA, the thing that pulled me away from writing Garg Fic #1. I was possessed. I was writing something in my head about Macbeth's relationship with Demona this summer, and suddenly (VERY suddenly) it morphed into this. Dang, but they're fun to think about. This fic is weird, it will contain one MAJOR narrative trope/cliche, and it's definitely going to be NSFW if I end up getting that far. But I reeeeeeally like this paragraph I wrote for it XD
Thanks for the template Zuz, and thanks to everyone else for letting me ramble about writing! See you again for the art roundup!
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faintedincoils · 2 years
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I've read a lot of tweets, Tumblr posts, and think pieces about AI generated art here lately. People have raised all sorts of interesting points but I haven't really seen anyone talk about how AI generated art can open up the world for people with aphantasia.
So here's the thing. I know what cats look like. I know what green and purple look like. I know what polka dots look like. My aphantasia is total in that I cannot picture any of these things in my mind--no, not even colors. And I certainly cannot picture a green cat with purple polka dots.
Statistically speaking, the vast majority of the people reading this can picture things in their mind. Which means that even if you've never seen a depiction of a green cat with purple polka dots, you can probably see it in your head, right? But me? I've never seen a green cat with purple polka dots. I tried googling the phrase just to see what would happen, and at least in the first couple of pages of results, I couldn't actually find a picture of a green cat with purple polka dots. And like I said, I can't picture it myself. So if I want to know what it would look like, up until now my options would pretty much have been to either grab a coloring book and make it happen, or get someone else to create an artistic representation for me. If I don't do either of those things, I'm just never going to know what this hypothetical cat would look like.
But if I can ever get added to the waitlist for Dall-E 2 or a similar program, I could change that. I could even specify that I want to see a realistic cat. Or say that I want a pastel green cat with dark purple polka dots. And an AI art program could show me that.
And I can do that with pretty much anything. And I'm not exaggerating when I say that when I think about that, I start crying.
When I was a little kid I used to daydream about someone one day creating some sort of a machine that could give you pictures inside your brain. I could never figure out why not only was there not such a thing, but nobody besides me seem to have even thought of it. People had all sorts of wild ideas about contraptions they could make, but being able to see things in your mind was an important enough to anyone else to make it happen?
I was in my mid thirties when I found out the reason why. What I have dreamed of my entire life is apparently a built-in feature for pretty much everyone else in the world. Which means no one is ever going to make a machine that will let me see things in my head. I'm just out of luck, and I've been trying really hard to get myself to accept that.
So with the sudden boom of AI generated art over the past few months, lots of people see a threat or a controversy.
All I can see is possibility and hope and wonder. All I can see is my eternal dream coming into existence, or at least as close as it's ever going to happen.
I'm crying now just typing all of this up. And it hasn't even become a reality for me yet, because I don't have access to any of the programs good enough to create representations of what I ask that don't trigger the uncanny valley for me. But in the next year or two maybe I can. I don't even care how much I have to pay for it. I've been waiting for this chance my whole entire life.
So I'm sure that people have really good reasons to protest or worry about AI generated art. But I am honestly so scared that those protests are going to shut it down before I ever even have my chance with it.
Sorry, I know this is a long post. And who knows if anyone will even read it. But I've been thinking about this an awful lot lately, and I just wanted to put it out there in the world.
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nebulous-rain · 3 months
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Hello! My name is Moriah and I am a junior in high school. I was wondering if I might be able to get your insight on a few questions I have?
I am in my final years of high school and am starting to think about college but I have no idea what I want to pursue. I know I love art, so for a long time I have been thinking about getting an art major or going to an art school.
I’m reaching out because I ABSOLUTELY LOVE YOUR ART and I think you are a very talented artist! I have been in love with your art for so long and I am curious and wondering how you are able to fit drawing into your life?
1.) If you are going to college for art, or went to college for art, what is it like? Do you think going to school for art or having an art major is worth it?
2.) how can I fit art into my everyday life? I’m sure you have work and other things to do in your life so how do you balance it out? (I just want to know how you can draw as much as you do!)
3.) do you do art as a hobby or a career? If it is a hobby how to you balance art, work/school, and home life? If it is a career or part-time career is it an alright source of income?
Thank you so much! And sorry if these questions might seem personal. I just want to know how other artist manage to draw and create their work and still have an adult life. Thanks again, and thank you for being a huge inspiration in my life to create the art I love! Your art means so much to me!❤️❤️ ❤️
i am going to CRY this is the sweetest message ever. i'm happy you found your niche and i'm even happier that i could help inspire that!!! i'm not sure if i'm gonna be able to answer all your questions, but i'll try to squeeze in some possibilities where i fall short:
1) growing up i definitely figured i was going to end up in art school because that's what everyone told me i should go into. but as i got older in high school i was kind of panicking cuz i really didn't want to turn my hobby into a job, and i figured out that i wanted to go into education!
but that's just me- my wife is actually going to college for graphic design sometime soon because she loves what she does. if it's something you really enjoy, and that you think you can monetize while still enjoying it, then it's definitely worth it! money is important but you need to put you and your happiness first.
2) to be honest, i haven't had the time or energy to do much art lately (if you look at my post dates you can see how spread out they've been the past year)- but this entirely depends on how you manage your time and your workload. i'm horrific at time management! so that's my problem. BUT, i think sneaking in drawing time in little ways helps a lot, as i tend to sketch small panels of a potential comic or animatic on notebooks and papers while i'm listening to lectures. i've even posted ms paint doodles i've drawn during class
i always have plans for what i'd like to draw once i have the time. it's kind of motivating, but also frustrating, and it's hard to efficiently empty my brain of ideas while still keeping up with everything else. this might be something you'll have to wiggle around once you get settled into a routine each semester!
3) i really wanted art to stay as a hobby for me. the idea of drawing and creating art every day for things i wasn't inspired to do made me really nervous, because what i really wanted was to make fanart and draw my little guys all day lol
if you take anything away from this, i think the most important thing is that if you want to keep art in your life, you will. if you desire having time to make art just for yourself, you'll find time to work that into your life, one way or another- but in order to do that you absolutely need to have a positive mindset about what you're going into, and if you can't find that positivity, maybe it isn't for you
thank you for asking!!! i'm not sure if this'll be any help, but i appreciate the questions <:')
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pocket-lin · 3 months
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hii <3
4, 11, 16 and 19 for the fandom asks??
(almost just wrote a plea for you to answer all of them but managed to restrain myself😅)
hi hi hi!! thank you for asking me these, this is so much fun!! reading back on these answers after I've written them is shocking because I really can just go on and on about stuff, huh? I really don't talk that much irl so I didn't know I had all this in me hahaha I'm so sorry!! I'm actually so embarrassed 😅 I'm gonna put the answer to 11 in a separate post so I can actually attach the picture I'm proud of!
4. say something nice about a ship you don't ship (it can be another ship in your fandom, a mutual's OTP, etc)
the one ship that's jumping out to me is dramione. I am a huge hater of this ship (sorry sorry sorry if you're reading this and it's your thing I love you and support you!!!) but you guys make some really cool shit and I'm happy you have a community you can share it with!! I've poked around in the ao3 and tumblr tags and its absolutely not for me, but there's some really beautiful and horny stuff out there for this ship and I so genuinely love that for all of you!
16. a tiny detail in canon that you want more people to appreciate
if I'm being totally honest with you, I haven't interfaced with the harry potter canon in a very long time. i already own all the movies and books and stuff, so I wouldn't even be giving jk money by rewatching/reading them, but it just kind of makes my stomach hurt when I think about supporting her in some way. I've had to work through a lot of complicated feelings in regards to jk and harry potter in general, as I'm sure many people have had to do! her words and actions and how I feel about it are not complicated at all, but what to do in the aftermath of it was something I had to figure out. I mean, I have a hp tattoo on my ankle!! my pinned post is about this specifically, but where I've ultimately landed on it all is this: I don't want to let her steal any more joy from me than she already has. there are so many queer and trans people in this fandom creating such incredible stuff, and I just don't want to lose that! I got off on a whole tangent here and definitely have a lot more I could say on the topic, BUT all this to say, I can't really think of tiny hp details anymore!! and in this specific fandom, I'm totally okay with that!
19. your current fandom(s)
the fandom that I interact with the most is definitely harry potter, but I have a bunch of other stuff I'm super into!!
the whole reason I got back into any fandom–and the entire reason I logged back into Tumblr for the first time since 2018–was because of our flag means death!! I've loved rhys darby since flight of the conchords and was so pumped that he was a lead in an hbo show! I was totally shocked when ofmd turned out to not be queerbait!! something about that first season just flipped a switch in me and I looked for fan fiction for the first time in like, 10 years!! I actually didn't even know about ao3 and tried to go to ff.net and it was a whole thing. getting back into fandom was very intimidating, I'm not gonna lie. (wow I really could just talk forever huh?)
my other fandoms are: the sandman, the witcher, good omens (I was so late to that show but jumped on right before the second season completely on accident), check please!, disco elysium, red dead redemption (especial rdr2), the x files, the walking dead, the rivers of london series, and d&d: honor among thieves.
and then there's some stuff that I don't even know how I got into!! like, the spideypool ship. gang, I've barely seen any marvel movies, I haven't read very many marvel comic books. and I honestly don't plan it because I just don't like marvel (once again, could go on about this forever, I was a manager at my local comic shop and have many opinions). but someone I follow posted about a fic (and I am not immune to beautiful fan art) and then I fell down the rabbit hole!! def have recs if anyone is interested!
another one is the ted lasso fandom. I genuinely don't remember why we never finished watching the second season but then the reviews for the third season was kinda mixed so I never went back to it. and then I saw a writer I'm head over heels for had a ted lasso fic (other lives by @andthepeople) and WHOOPS I fell down another rabbit hole!! i also have ted lasso recs!
essentially, if ya boy's read/watched/listened to something, you know he's gonna go look at what the freaks (affectionate) are posting on ao3.
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darby-draws · 3 months
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1 and 12 for Quinn, 18 for Andre ?
Thanks for asking! [questions]
Read More for big long post! <3
1 What was the first element of your OC that you remember considering (name, appearance, backstory, etc.)?
It was right after Art Fight and I desperately wanted a Queer Horror OC before Halloween season. There was a lot of talk about what kind of horror we wanted to go towards. (which maybe still is not quite settled as there are multiple "Horror Movie Plots" in our Whorror Movie story.) But we settled on demon possessed with some religious trauma and a bit of delicious revenge, and Darla and I both worked on designing our own guys separately and see how they would fit together. I sketched these:
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I thought the demon might be similar to an AU demon we have, Goopy, who possesses Lucky and Nate in a story, so that's why I have the drippy drawing in the corner and the inspo for the top surgery tattoos. That's how Goopy was! But Quinn's Demon is a bit different now! Black hair with horns was a must but it mostly became spiky hair with the Vibe of horns. (… unless! rule of cool: draw them as horns anyway its badass!!)
In an early iteration of the story Quinn and Parker were going to find a baby possessed by a demon, from an Evil Cult Town. Quinn's demon and Parker's strength (and bloodthirst) destroyed their Big Bad leader who was doing the baby/demon sacrifices, and the baby was abandoned, maybe thought to be dead? They were like sure… We'll see what we can do with this little thang. They named it Blair Belladonna. They knew of an older witchy/demon knowledgeable grandma figure (literally Domino's Grandma before Domino was a character) who could help them learn about this baby's demon and how to raise a little demonling. BUT That never settled into canon, there is no baby Blair. (However! Much of the baby demon possessing cult thing turned into Domino's backstory. 👀)
12 What have you found to be most difficult about creating art for your OC?
Remembering the dripping perma crying eyeliner down his cheeks. Yes it's supposed to be a permanent feature. 😔 Also figuring out how to draw the hair in between the "horns", how to make it spiky but not distract from The Big Spikes, which direction its going off in, etc. Otherwise I think Quinns pretty easy to grasp for me! 🤔 I love when I get to use flat black for hair and clothes when I'm just doodling so thats always a relief.
18 What is the most recent thing you’ve discovered about your OC?
This was trickyyy ahh Andre's such an old character that hasn't been the main focus lately, so a lot of thinking of him recently has been like. Reminiscing on old facts and not necessarily bringing in anything new. If theres something I've recently discovered of him, I can't think of it!
One thing I've recently decided after some consideration is that I'm going to fuse the Original Andre story where he adopts Delilah the robot and the AU where Andre has an Actual Human Baby instead of the robot together. So now, Delilah and baby Leia exist at the same time! Yay, two of them!!! It's gonna have to make me rethink and plan out his timeline a bit differently and see how he reacts to things now. I just haven't actually set out the time to plan the combined story yet. I feel like I softened up Andre's story a bit in the baby AU, (less drug use, less bad relationships with sketchy people, etc) so I'll have to see if I end up keeping it slightly more balanced or if it'll stay more true to the Actual Canon events, maybe just pushed around the timeline a bit.
Something else that feels new from semi recent times: I thought of an AU where all three of his parents actually like. Get together/stay together polycule it up and raise Andre together rather than the usual backstory of:
two good friends in college befriend and get a crush on the same woman
the guys start a business together
one of them marries the woman and they have a kid together but he gets way too into his work and neglects his wife, oops :(
she then goes to their friend for comfort, which leads to cheating, which leads to she GETS PrEGNANT (WITH ANDRE!) (NOT her Husband's child!) oops :(
she tells her husband the truth and they talk about separating
The Friend leaves The Business and is told to basically never speak to them again
Husband decides will simply raise this child as his own and works on bettering himself and the marriage (if only for appearances and/or for their older daughters sake) and he will simply Not resent the New Child for any reason, it's That Easy! (he said, you know, like a liar.)
Andre finds this out (Accidentally! From his SISTER) as a full grown ass adult and it fucks him up for a bit. oops :(
⬆ this is a lot to Get Into. And also it's Not the new stuff, although I probably haven't actually delved into it before…!
But basically, all this to say, this New 3 Parent AU leads to Andre being much more well adjusted, because so much of his… THing in his life (in canon timeline) has juust been. family treating him unfairly for something he had no part in and resenting/reacting to that. 🥴 And his two dads are such opposite strict/lenient personalities that they'd balance each other like, reallly wellll if they had that opportunity to both raise him from the start, and Andre would have someone in his corner when he's Going Through rough times in life. AUgh. If only… (Also his bio dad is … probably autistic like him so I think someone would like, UNDERSTAND him and the way he does things while growing up which is like, wow groundbreaking.)
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superman86to99 · 7 months
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Superman #90 (June 1994)
"THE BATTLE FOR METROPOLIS," Part 3! Things are BOOMING in Metropolis! Last issue ended with Lex Luthor (we can probably drop the "Jr." by now) remotely detonating a bomb right next to Superman and the badly injured Guardian. In this one we quickly find out that there have actually been several Lex-triggered explosions (Lexplosions, if you will) all across the city. Lex watches the mayhem from his yacht, maniacally shouting that if he has to die, he's taking the whole city with him.
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Meanwhile, from the safety of his comfy office in Project Cadmus, wily ol' Director Westfield decides to take advantage of the chaos to get rid of those pesky Underworld clones once and for all. He secretly launches a series of missiles that spread deadly gas throughout the city's sewers, killing several peaceful Underworlders who were just chilling there (when he could have waited a few days for the Clone Plague to get them). Renegade geneticist Dabney Donovan, who has hidden cameras all over Cadmus, notices what Westfield is doing and doesn't like it, not because he's the Underworlders' "father" but because he wants to keep experimenting on them.
Meanwhile meanwhile, Superman takes the unconscious Guardian to Cadmus and bumps into Westfield, who rudely invites him to leave. Superman, who has never liked Westfield, lets him know as much and warns him that as soon as the current mess is over, he's letting everyone know exactly how much he sucks.
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Westfield brushes him off and is like "No one will ever bring me down! I WILL LIVE FOREVER!" Then, while Superman is distracted dealing with one of those missiles, Dubbilex's telepathic powers suddenly pick up "a presence in Cadmus" he "hasn't felt in a very long time..."
That's right, you guessed it: it's freakin' Psi-Phon and Dreadnaught!
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Wait, no, that was Dabney Donovan. And yes, he just murdered Paul "King of the World" Westfield with some poison gas. Official cause of death: irony. CONTINUED NEXT WEEK (or whenever we write that post) IN ADVENTURES OF SUPERMAN #513!
Character-Watch:
And that's the end of Director Westfield, who has been a pain in the ass since 1991's Superman #58. It says a lot that, unlike everyone else who dies at Cadmus, they've never brought this jerk back via cloning... or have they?! (Geoff Johns: "No, they haven't.") I'm not sorry to see him go, but I do think that his death makes certain future revelations regarding the character kinda anticlimactic.
Don Sparrow says: "Quite a fall for Westfield. In the Bloodhounds storyline he seemed like a tough, if flawed leader. But in this book he’s exactly as bad as Luthor." Yeah, he seemed like a somewhat reasonable authority figure until "Funeral for a Friend," when he started his slow descent into supervillain status. Maybe a more satisfying ending for him would have been turning him into an actual supervillain, perhaps via Dabney's ironic experiments... It's not too late to tell that tale, DC!
Plotline-Watch:
The best part of the issue is Superman saying he "almost hates" throwing one of those poison gas missiles into the stratosphere because "half the time I throw stuff into space it comes back even more dangerous!" We've been documenting that tradition for years, so that was satisfying to read. To my knowledge, that missile never became sentient and came back as "Missile-O" or something, but I could be wrong.
Superman tells Westfield that "cloning ruined my home planet." We saw that story (with sweet, sweet Mike Mignola art) in the World of Krypton miniseries.
Dabney Donovan says he wants to continue studying the Underworlders to "create new life that will survive the coming apocalypse." I'm not sure if by "apocalypse" he means this storyline or a... future one. Also, keyboard, multiple monitors, a big and probably expensive microphone -- is Dabney a Twitch streamer?
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Westfield teases Superman because he can't be in multiple places at once, musing that maybe he'll create a being who can do that as his next experiment. So if he hadn't died, the next Cadmus creation would have been Madrox the Multiple Man.
Some impressively dumb Lex-Men chase Lois and shoot at her for "ripping off corporate secrets" (actually that tape of Lex killing his trainer from last issue). When she says they're making a big mistake, they laugh at her and one says "You ain't got a prayer, lady! Not unless you got yourself a guardian angel!" Are they... not from Metropolis? That would explain why one bothers trying to blast Superman "to smithereens" once he inevitably shows up.
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After Superman takes care of those goons, Lois notices there's a camera in one of the helmets and uses the opportunity to tell Lex that he's screwed. He shouts: "NO! Who's her informant? Packard? Happersen? Or somebody else?" Lex, you've got exactly three recurring employees in this era. Come on, it's not that hard.
Patreon-Watch:
This post was brought to you by Aaron, Chris “Ace” Hendrix, britneyspearsatemyshorts, Patrick D. Ryall, Bheki Latha, Mark Syp, Ryan Bush, Raphael Fischer, Kit, Sam, Bol, and Gaetano Barreca, the Superman '86 to '99 Patreon Gang!
And also by everyone's pal Don Sparrow, who wrote the section after the jump...
Art-Watch (by @donsparrow):
We begin with a great cover, of an anguished Superman in the rubble of Metropolis.  I’m gonna assume that this is moments before Superman leapt into action, and helped all those people behind him with the recovery effort, but you gotta take a minute or two to grieve.  Joe Rubinstein is a legendary inker, to be sure, but his inks never fully jibed with Dan Jurgens pencils, it seems to me, and this cover shows a little bit of that.  The rim lighting on the arms going so far from the edge makes Superman look almost excessively lean/defined, but that’s only noticeable when you stare at it as long as I have.
Inside the book we have guest pencils from Brent Anderson, whose art can be hit or miss for me, over the years.  His Astro City stuff, for example, was terrific, like a modern Curt Swan, but at times, but in other instances—like this issue—there can be an unpleasantly rushed feel to his art.  The surface detail is always terrific, and Neal Adams-like, but sometimes his forms can go a bit wonky.  The very opening splash page is a good example of this. 
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At first glance, this seems like a terrific page, a great montage of different things happening over Metropolis.  But then when you zoom in on both Guardian and Superman’s faces (particularly Guardian), things seem a little asymmetrical.  This is not to say that there aren’t some excellent moments—there are!  Page 5 has a great tall panel of Superman soaring into action.  Dabney Donovan is looking quite Dr. Robotnik-like as he surveys Westfield’s final solution for the Underworlders.  Page 12 unfortunately boasts another wonky Superman face, almost saved by the surface detailing.  The absolute weirdest Superman face appears a little later, during the guardian angel exchange, where Kal-El is looking like he sproinged off the pages of Mad Magazine.
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There’s another good flying shot comes on page 17, where Superman darts out of a sewer pipe.   On the whole, a pretty inconsistent looking book, with backgrounds being a particularly weak point (apart from the extreme perspective shot of Metropolis early on). Story-wise, not a ton happens, apart from Superman zig-zagging to and from disasters, though we do get a little movement on the clone illness (that Guardian is apparently immune) and a recap of last week, revealing that Lois has damning evidence against Luthor.
STRAY OBSERVATIONS:
Lex’s soldiers are pretty sexist, in addition to being willing murderers.  How does a guy list when hiring for that position?
Funny note as Superman launches the poison gas missile into space, as he muses “half the time I throw stuff into space, it comes back even more dangerous.”  Certainly true of the Eradicator, but I’m trying to think of other examples.  [Max: Off the top of my head, there's the time he threw that living cemetery into space and it turned into a murder cloud, the time he left a lab suspended in orbit and it eventually spawned the Cyborg Superman (who did his own space-tossing with Doomsday), and, hmmm, does the time he threw himself into space and came back with a deadly artifact count?]
Very Obi-Wan-like reaction from Dubbilex, as he senses Dabney Donovan’s presence.  I always thought that Donovan was somewhere nearby as it was, so it’s odd that Dubbilex would only now sense his brainwaves.
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How does the gas hurt Westfield to the point that he’s choking blood, but not at all affect the maskless Donovan? [Max: Maybe he was a poison gas-immune Dabney clone who only thought he was the "one and only"?]
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citruscrisp · 1 year
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Ciiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiitruuuuuusss!
You doing ok? You haven't post anything in a while. I miss yooooouuuuu😭😭😭
Omg I have not opened my app in for a while, my heart is so happy seeing you look out for me, I really do love you all and appreciate all the love and kindness I’ve received on this site!
I’ve actually fallen into a burn out recently - on my main Twitter account (@/ citruscrisp) because the main fandom I was in (Deltarune) is seemingly dying off. This is how I work: I would draw Deltarune content and then combo it with some pikmin art every once in a while. (I’ve done this with other fandoms, too lol). I haven’t been drawing much at all lately, just doodles in my sketchbook 😭 my apologies! My motivation hasn’t been very high lately!
On top of that, my semester has gotten crazy from one single class (Figurative Painting). It has consumed most of free time especially with our recent midterm.
I’m hoping around May-July (especially when Pikmin 4 releases) I’ll be back and kickin’! Life has just gotten a bit messy for me right now! Thank you, again, for you your concern! 💖
I promise you all my love for pikmin is undying, I could never express that enough! 🫶
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