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madam-wakefield · 6 months

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Open when...Chapter 1

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Summary:

When a few years into their relationship Bernie is asked to go back to the army and deploy Serena isn't sure how she's going to get through the nine months without her girlfriend. What she doesn't expect is for it to be her girlfriend who has the perfect set of surprises to get her through both the best and the worst days. Canon divergent - Elinor lives (well actually the accident never happens), Raf lives, and Cameron isn't a total ass! The staff of AAU also probably didn't all work on there at the same time in canon but do in this! The fic is already fully written with the first few chapters having already been Beta'd. 27 chapters including the epilogue. Hoping to post every Monday and Friday!

Chapter 1

Open when you get this…

Serena always knew she’d go to work the day after Bernie had deployed. In some way, she can make herself believe that this is just like the times when Bernie has gone away for a few days for a medical conference or to visit an old army friend. But deep down she knows it’s not, knows that she won’t see Bernie in person for nine months.

She walks into their office and there on her desk is a beautiful floral box full of what look like ivory envelopes. Serena sits down in her chair and pulls it close to the desk, noticing one delicate envelope propped up against the front of the box.

She stares at it, eyes fixed upon Bernie’s messy writing on the front: Serena - Open when you get this…

She stares at it a little longer, wanting to commit this image to memory before complying.

My Dearest Serena,

The main reason for writing these letters is because I love you! I love you so much and I want to be able to remind you of that as much as I can. In your moments of weakness. In your moments of joy. When you need to feel loved know that I will always love you. These letters are just here to remind you of that while we are apart for the next nine months. Put them somewhere you will see them often, or carry them around with you if you have to, so you always remember to Open When You…”

I love you and miss you so much already.

All My Love, Bernie,

Your Big Macho Army Medic x

She knows she doesn’t have time to respond instantly, she’s got ward rounds to do, and a short surgery scheduled but she promises herself this is the perfect excuse to write Bernie her first bluey.

She plans to write to her on her break but of course, all the best laid plans always go wrong. Bernie’s red phone rings just as she’s about to go and get herself a pastry from Pulses. She’s missing her girlfriend, so who can blame her if she wants a bit of comfort food?

She goes into surgery with Raf, naturally taking the lead. He’s a good surgeon and she knows it, but it’s going to take her some time to be able to give up control to him in that way. She’s so used to working with Bernie in that respect, where neither of them really takes control, they just work side by side effortlessly without there needing to be a lead.

After surgery she updates the patient’s family and is just thinking that she’ll have a break now, and maybe actually write to Bernie, when Sacha comes onto the ward to remind her that she’s ten minutes late for the clinical leads’ meeting. Thankfully, she can blame it on the emergency surgery.

She spends more of the meeting thinking about Bernie than actually paying attention. Wondering how Bernie’s flight was. Wondering exactly where Bernie is now. Wondering how she is ever going to get through the next nine months without her girlfriend.

Normally after a meeting, Bernie will spoil her with coffee and a pastry and kisses if there is time, but she knows she isn’t getting that today or for the next nine months and she can’t help but feel a little deflated at the thought.

She’s professional enough to offer her opinion a few times to make it look like she’s paying attention to the meeting but doesn’t really stretch herself. She’ll make up for it another time but today isn’t it.

After the meeting she grabs her own coffee and pastry from Pulses and is this time determined to write Bernie’s letter, so she walks back onto AAU and locks herself in her office. She takes her time thumbing through the envelopes in the box, allowing herself to glance at what’s written on some of them, from love, to sorrow to anger, although she’s not convinced, she’ll need to use that last one. She then turns to her own bag and gets out one of the blueys she has in there—she and Bernie had picked up a stack from the post office before her deployment—and her favourite writing pen before sitting down at her desk. She knows she could use the INtouch electronic mail service to send Bernie an email but she wants the first letter she writes her girlfriend to be a handwritten one.

Dear Bernie,

How!?! How did you ever get time to think so much about my needs while doing all the things you had to do? The idea of the envelopes has filled my heart with joy and all I can say is I’m so damn lucky that I am the woman you want to share your life with.

I had a quick look through the other envelopes, and I cannot believe all of the different occasions you have managed to cover. I do not have the words to tell you how loved this gesture of yours has made me feel. And you say that you don’t think you’re very good at romance!

I’ve got so much more I want to write but I’ve got to cut this letter short as your red phone is pulling me away from my break, but I promise to write again soon.

All my love, darling…

Stay safe, soldier.

Serena x

The red phone call leads to a complicated surgery. Serena stays with the trauma patient and completes the surgery, even if it does mean that it’s two hours past her shift when she finally finishes. By the time she gets home and into bed she’s at least so tired and in need of rest that she doesn’t have as much time to miss Bernie, so she falls asleep much more easily than she had the previous night.

#Open When #Berena #Bernie Wolfe #Serena Campbell #berena fanfic #holby city #holby #buckle fandom #madam wakefield writes #Berena Fanfiction #Berena FF #Holby Fanfic #Holby FF #Holby Fanfiction #Holby City ff #Holby City fanfic #Holby City fanfiction

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missberena · 3 months

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Does anybody know where WONKO is? All her works vanished 😢

#berena #bernie wolfe #catherine russell #serena campbell #jemma redgrave #berena fanfic #bmam

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coldblizzardqueen · 1 year

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Part 3 - The Definition of Eternity

Part 3 Bernie arrived back at Serena’s house a couple of hours later. Hanging her coat up and slipping off her boots, she called out to let Serena know she was home.

She wandered into the kitchen and saw Serena had had a shower and changed into a pair of navy jeans and a soft, teal coloured jumper and her light grey water-fall cardigan. On her feet were the slippers she had taken back from Bernie earlier on.

Serena turned from the kitchen counter and smiled at Bernie. She handed her a cup of coffee. Shuffling a little, she took a sip of her own coffee before looking at Bernie with a sad smile.

“I know you want to talk Bernie. But I thought we sorted everything out yesterday…” She began. “This is…it’s painful enough, without us sitting here and dissecting everything.” Her voice was small, pained, and Bernie just wanted to gather her up in her arms.

“No dissecting…I just have a few things that I need to say, and I need you to hear…Not just listen to…actually hear.” Bernie explained gently. The head of steam that had propelled her to stay and fight the night before had dissipated and all she wanted was a frank conversation. One which she hoped might have a happy outcome.

“I’m not the one with the crappy communication skills darling.” Serena sniped. Her vulnerability of just seconds ago replaced with Serena Campbell, the fierce and fearless vascular surgeon.

As though a switch had flipped, Bernie’s ire returned as she countered gruffly. “No, you break us up out of guilt and convince yourself it’s for the best.”

Serena scoffed indignantly and glared. “You make me sound like a martyr.”

“Aren’t you?” Bernie asked as she took a seat at the kitchen table and put her mug down with a little more force that intended. Coffee sloshed over the rim and trickled down her hand.

“If you’re just going to insult me…” Serena started as she threw a tea towel towards the table.

Bernie caught the flying cloth and wiped her hands, then around and underneath her cup as she spoke a little more gently. “That’s not my intention…I am prepared to fight for us…but I don’t want to row…I want us to talk. Properly.”

Serena sighed, “I need some fresh air.” She lifted her mug. “Should we take these outside?”

Bernie nodded. Quick to grasp the tenuous olive branch from Serena, “I’ll grab our coats.”

When she re-entered the kitchen, Serena had already gone through the French doors and was sitting on the angled love seat on the patio. The choice of seat was not lost on Bernie as the small, attached table in the middle of the seat meant that they were not able to sit to closely but the angle this created meant that they could look at each other.

She shrugged on her coat, grabbed a box of matches from the ‘clutter’ drawer and seeing Serena had taken her mug as well as her own, she headed outside to join her.

Serena startled when Bernie draped her winter coat over her shoulders. She had brought the warm down filled one rather than her lovely but not nearly as cosy woollen work coat. As Serena wrapped the coat around her, Bernie lit the small paraffin patio heater.

“That should keep us warm enough for a bit.” Bernie said as she took her seat and lifted her mug of coffee from the small table to take a sip.

She took another sip and observed Serena for a moment. She looked beautiful with the cool winter sunlight shining around her. Her silvery hair looked luminous where the suns rays caught it and she was smiling softly as she watched a robin flutter between the bird table, the washing line and the fence as though playing a little game. After a few moments she turned her attention to Bernie who took a deep breath before starting to speak.

“I love you…I just want to get that out there first…I love you and I want to be with you and love you for the rest of my life.” Openly saying those three little words was easy when she was talking with Serena because she felt them in the very depths of her soul. Thanks to her ingrained Britishness, they still came with a little flush of colour to her throat and cheeks, but she didn’t care. It had taken her whole life to say them and mean them with a strength and profundity she had honestly thought she was incapable of.

Serena exhaled a slow breath, the warm air pluming and spiralling upwards as it met the crisp winter atmosphere. “Bernie…Us loving each other isn’t the problem…You are the greatest love of my life…We just want different things out of a relationship…We’re not compatible.” Serena’s eyes were imploring as she looked at her love.

Bernie shook her head, “What do you want from our relationship.” She tried to keep exasperation out of her tone, but up until a couple of days ago she had thought she and Serena were on the same page all be it on different continents. But now it felt like they had spent months working from different books.

Serena’s hands flew upwards and then flopped uselessly into her lap as she obviously tried and failed to find the words to articulate her feelings. “More.”

When she didn’t elaborate, Bernie asked, “More what? I am trying to understand Serena. I really am.” She stopped herself from speaking. Deciding that giving Serena a bit of silence in which to gather her thoughts might be more conducive to a productive conversation.

“More everything.” Serena stopped. She pondered a moment. She had the look of someone wondering whether to open completely or to hold back. The micro-movements of her features told Bernie a whole war was being waged internally. She was therefore relieved when Serena started to speak again and had seemingly opted for candour “I want to work with you again…or at least work in the same time zone and close enough so that we can be at home together at night…Go to bed together each night…Go for walks I pretend to hate on the weekend…See Jason and Greta and Guinevere for Sunday lunch…” She stopped as her voice cracked. “To be a real couple…to bicker about who does the dishes…To make love wherever and whenever we want to just because we’re in love and lust with each other….” She stopped as she appeared to run out of steam.

Bernie reached out a hand to Serena and was relieved when she took it, “I offered that…didn’t I? I quit my job. Said I would move back here, so we could start again, properly. Give ourselves a real chance.”

“It’d never work Bernie…At some point you’re going to be itching to get back to some far-flung destination…I won’t be enough for you…Pushing Guinevere on the swings…Taking out the bins…All the mundanity of a ‘normal’ life will eat at you until you resent it all.”

Bernie drew her hand back and placed it on her lap. Her gaze moving away from Serena’s “You don’t think very much of me, do you?” She said quietly. A deeply felt sadness creeping into her words.

Serena gasped at the statement, “Wha…Bernie I…Of course I do…You know I do.” She tried to reach for Bernie’s hands, but the small table obstructed her.

Bernie needed to clear her thoughts for a moment, so she drained her cup and stood up. “I need another one of these…Do you?”

Serena handed Bernie her cup with a nod. “Bernie I’m…”

Bernie gave a wan smile. “I just need a minute that’s all…Are you warm enough?”

Serena nodded and returned the weak smile.

While she was alone in the kitchen Bernie allowed a few tears to fall. This was the most important conversation of her life, and she was terrified because for all Serena’s honesty, she could feel the woman she loved slipping away from her. She spooned instant into their mugs then as the kettle continued to boil, she nipped into the hall and grabbed something from her bag. It was time to bring out the big guns, if she were to stand any chance of holding onto Serena Wendy Campbell.

With renewed determination, she sloshed boiling water into the two mugs, gave them a quick stir and then carried them outside. Placing Serena’s next to her elbow as she re-took her seat and wrapped her hands around the hot, thick ceramic.

As soon as Bernie sat, Serena started to speak. “I’m sorry Bernie…I honestly…I think the world of you, you know that. But you’re a maverick…you thrive in situations most people would shrink away from…If I hadn’t cheated on what we had, you’d still be out there waiting for the next adrenaline fuelled trauma hit…And you’re a brilliant surgeon…Making you come home to me…fettering you to me…it would be like clipping a brilliant, beautiful, rare birds wings…I won’t do that to you…I won’t”

Bernie growled. “Right Serena Wendy Campbell, that’s enough…I’m not some beautiful, rare bird that you’d be preventing from flying…I’m a normal, fallible, human being.” She turned in her seat so that she could face Serena more easily. “When we met, I was a locum surgeon bouncing around different departments filling in and clashing with just about everyone…I went home at night, fed-up, to a husband I didn’t really know anymore and two resentful kids who expected me to suddenly behave like Maria Von Trapp…You befriended me initially…forgave me eventually…and you became my best friend almost overnight.”

She took a deep breath and a hearty slurp of her coffee to wet her suddenly very dry mouth. “Then after a few false starts” She held her hand up “Which I’m aware were caused by my reticence…we got together…We’d already fallen in love.” She squeezed Serena’s hand. “My point is that the person you fell in love with wasn’t someone who was chasing trauma surgeries in far-flung destinations as compensation for a lost army career…it was someone who had divorced her husband…obliterated her relationship with her kids…but who was laying down roots in Holby…who was thriving in AAU with the trauma bay and working alongside you every day.” She looked beseechingly into Serena’s eyes, which were glassy with tears and prayed she was getting through to her. Bernie kept hold of Serena’s hand as she dug around in her pocket. When she placed a small, quite tattered, black velvet box with a tiny, dirty brass hook and eye closing onto the table, Serena gasped quietly. She eyed the box, looked up at Bernie and then back to the box. “Is that…”

Bernie gently pulled her hand from Serena’s grasp so that she could open the box. “It can mean whatever you want it to mean.” She started. “I hope one day it might be engagement but if that’s too much for now…it can be what it is…My Great-Grandma’s eternity ring, that I want you to have as an unmistakeable confirmation of my commitment to you.” She took the ring out of the box. The small dark red ruby, with two smaller but exquisitely cut diamonds either side of it glinted in the sunlight. “I pledged eternity months ago but we both forgot that eternity will be infinitely better if we’re together.” She held the ring out towards Serena. Serena watched as Bernie’s wide, closed mouth smile spread across her face. “You put it on whatever finger you like…just please be sure…If you wear it…You’re stuck with me forever.”

Serena took the ring from Bernie’s fingers. Her hands were shaking as she put it on the third finger of her left hand. “Eternity sounds perfect to me.” Her voice trembled as she spoke, and tears were running freely over her cheeks. “We can document it with a registrar in the not-too-distant future if you’d like to?”

Bernie moved to kneel in front of her love and leaned towards her. Serena met her as their noses touched in a gentle ‘kiss,’ seconds before their lips collided to seal their commitment.

Eternity = “Infinite or Unending Time”

#berena #bernie wolfe #serena campbell #the definition of eternity part 3 #fix it fic #berena fanfic

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tebarambles · 1 year

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Chapters: 1/? Fandom: Holby City Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Serena Campbell/Bernie Wolfe Characters: Serena Campbell, Bernie Wolfe, Dominic Copeland, assorted Holby City Hospital staff Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Post-Break Up, Angst with a dash of seasonal nonsense, and a Happy Ending (i promise), a (not so) silent night Summary:

It’s December, Bernie is back from Kyiv, and Serena is not ready to forgive and forget. Yet.

Remember when we all thought that Kyiv was the worst thing that could happen to Bernie and Serena? Lol. But now all is well, so, naturally, I had to go back and make it worse.

So here it is, my entry for the @berena-winter-event

My song was “Back to December” by Taylor Swift, nominated by @lilolilyr .

A huge thank-you to @batnbreakfast and @ktlsyrtis for blessing the fandom with yet another fun event :)

#a (not so) silent night #my fic #berena fanfic #you guys i can't believe it actually happened

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squishmittenficfan · 2 months

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Bernie and Serena go for a little walk at the end of a boring conference.

#berena #fanfic #my fic #berena weekly fix #berena fix pier

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sapphicdbc · 11 months

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4 for the questions.

Hello Anon!

The week has been chocker block so I’m only replying to you now, sorry :)

“4. How many fic ideas are you nurturing right now? Care to share one?”

I won’t lie anon, I have a good few. I have over 100 drafts of fics that for some dumb reason I never post. I’m working on it though!

I am currently trying to continue Surrender, my Frankie fic.

Otherwise, I have a couple of Melissa Schemmenti x reader fics that I’m working on;

- Melissa and the museum volunteer

- Melissa at an Italian restaurant

-Melissa goes speed dating

-Melissa and the cover teacher

-Melissa and her nighttime love (this is technically two ideas in one and I’m still figuring out what to do...)

I’d be more than happy to share my progress of one of them if interested? Let me know!

And thank you for the question, very appreciated :))

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lilolilyr · 5 days

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Leap of Faith - an alternate Berena meeting

Summary: Bernie is trying to come to terms with her sexuality, and decides to go to the monthly gay club night, where Serena is a frequent visitor...

2k words, rated T, no archive warnings apply.

Read on Ao3 • all Berena fic by me • mobile

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berenaadvent · 7 months

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I’ve been AWOL but would anyone be interested in this coming back?

Okay so I’ve been AWOL for a few Christmases but I’m back and wondering if any of the Berena fandom is active enough to still want this?

#bernie wolfe #berena advent #serena campbell #berena #berena fanfiction #berena fanfic #Holby City

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weeklyberenafix · 4 months

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Prompts

I want this blog/ the weekend prompt to be about the readers and writers so wanna ask you all to send prompts - these can be anonymous if you like (even if they are not no one else will know who gave what prompt ) these can come at any time as I’m hoping to keep this running but I’d like to get a list started so I can get at least the first month’s prompts written up on artwork once’s I’ve finished the roundup posts for the @berenaadvent

#weekly berena fix #berena #bernie wolfe #Serena Campbell #holby #Holby city #buckle fandom #berena fanfic

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veganpepsibaby · 20 days

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Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Holby City Rating: Not Rated Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Relationships: Serena Campbell/Bernie Wolfe, Serena Campbell & Bernie Wolfe Characters: Serena Campbell, Bernie Wolfe Series: Part 20 of Lazarus in the Room series Summary:

Serena Campbell arrives at the bedside of a once thought dead Wolfe. Part 19 - continuation of New Years Eve December 2021/January 2022.

#berena #serena campbell #bernie wolfe #holby city #bernie wolfe x serena campbell #fanfic

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madam-wakefield · 5 months

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Decorating the tree

Just my little drabble for the @berenaadvent day 4 prompt “duck”

Read on A03

Bernie had never really been one for decorating for Christmas. She’s spent more of her adult Christmases deployed somewhere or another and it was always Marcus and the children who decorated. Even on the few occasions she was at home working at the local army camp they decorated without her. Never wanted to wait for the weekend for her to be free always wanting to put the Christmas decorations up on the first day of December. Bernie didn’t begrudge them it, it’s what they did when she was deployed so why should they change it just because she wasn’t.

Serena is different however, Serena always wants them to decorate together and Bernie loves it. They are about to spend their third Christmas together and true to form Serena has waited until they have a shared day off to set about tackling the decorations.

Bernie had been into the loft the night previous, thankful for only being on a short shift rather than one of the usual long days. And now they are stood in the living room surround by all the Christmas decorations Serena has collected over the years. It’s maybe the only thing that makes Bernie feel a little sad, that she doesn’t have any, Marcus kept all what they had collected as a family after the divorce.

“Do you want to tackle the lights and I’ll set about sorting the tinsel ready for the tree? We can then add the baubles and decorations together. Then once that’s done we can sort out everything else?”

“Sounds perfect.” Bernie says before leaning into give Serena a kiss, for no other reason than because she can.

Half an hour later and Bernie is just finishing changing the last of the dead bulbs in the lights. It’d taken her 15 minutes to untangle them all, she doesn’t understand that, because they always wrap them up so carefully when they take them down. Her back is complaining so she’d taken to standing to complete the job rather than crouching on the floor.

“Duck please dear,” she hears Serena’s voice come from above her. Bernie glancing up to see Serena stood on the step ladder set just to her side, hands splayed out to sort out the tree branches to look exactly how she wants them. Bernie knows better than the argue and ducks obediently, feels a few loose pin needles drop onto her head as Serena fiddles with the branches.

“Thank you.” Serena says, her cue that she can once again stand tall. They work together from there to wrap the lights around the tree in just the perfect way. It’s Bernie who climbs the ladder to wrap the lights around the top of the tree. Looks down to see Serena has already started on the tinsel at the bottom, to make the whole job a little quicker.

“It’s your turn to duck, sweetheart, unless you want to join these lights on the tree.” She watches as Serena raises an eyebrow at her but complies anyway. Allowing Bernie to wrap the last of the lights around the tree.

“Okay you can try turning them on now,” it’s easy from Serena’s already stooped state and as the lights flash to life Bernie does think they look magical.

The rest of the day finds them adding baubles and decorations to the tree before setting out to decorate the rest of the house. Wreathes on the doors, lights in the windows, tinsel around photos frames and general Christmas ornaments laid here and there.

As has been tradition for the past three years the final decoration to be hung is the sprig of mistletoe that always gets placed in the doorway between the hallway and the living room. Once it’s firmly in place both women duck under it and share a long lingering kiss. Knowing they have an excuse to do just that every day for the next few weeks, not that they really need one of course.

#Berena Advent 2023 #Berena Advent Duck #Madam Wakefield Writes #holby city #holby #buckle fandom #bernie wolfe #serena campbell #berena #Berena Fanfic

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