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choco-mark · 4 years

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Dreamies reaction to being your roommate or how they would be your roommate? idk if that makes sense..tyyy💖

scenario: nct dream as your roommate

mark

concerned roommate

was really shy when he first met you + when you moved in he was all like making sure to give you space and gave you a little tour of the apartment and even told you a little bit about himself which you found really cute

you thought it would be IMPOSSIBLE to break him out of his barrier but he eventually did but damn can this boy be WILD

you don’t let him cook because the last time you left your water boiling and asked him to watch it while you went to the bathroom, it ended up on him, yeah you had to tend to his burned skin even though he insisted HE WAS FINE

gets along well with your friends, though they find him kinda hot and ask you why you haven’t gotten laid yet and orders food for them when they’re over (generous bby 🥺)

and at school??? y’all both go to the same uni so bUs riDes but y’all don’t really see each other THAT much but when it does happen, all the dreamies tease him like you’re his girlfriend and you get all flustered as if y’all are actually dating

y’all know well as hell when y’all go out, y’all be sharing the little crappy earbuds on the bus and listening to some r&b + he loves it when you fall asleep on his shoulder but makes fun of you later

falls asleep everywhere and i mean EVERYWHERE, you name it, the horrible excuse of a kitchen, the bathroom, and you even found him in your own room once which led to some TALKS

does the dishes whenever you want him to and doesn’t really care for chores (?) like he doesn’t want to bother you so like he just does them for the sake of the apartment

y’all are mutually afraid of your landlord, who once came banging at y’alls door at 5 in the morning on a monday and you thought you were gonna be robbed but it was just your feisty landlord who had returned from their trip to australia

breaks things A LOT, and i feel like he would try and cover them up if it’s not that big of a deal like ‘mark, why’s there glass in the garbage’ ‘i, um, broke it’ but you know he breaks shit all the time bc that’s the fifth glass

hangs out with you in the living room even if y’all are doing your own thing but you both feel comfortable just feeling the presence of each other

goes shopping for groceries without you, forgets what y’all actually need, and calls you like fifty times (you make him come with you now)

i don’t think mark would really do pranks on you but he might like try and scare you randomly and you being the paranoid babe you are get all jumpy and ‘MARK!!’

has a crush on you but doesn’t know it himself until you get sick one day since you walked home in the rain and he takes care of you and gets all worried (uwu) and then is like ‘OH SHIT’

you fall asleep on the couch while having (rare) movie nights with him, and kinda wants to carry you to your room after the movie’s over but also doesn’t know if he should and has a mental break but you wake up and leave yourself

realizes that he’s falling for you more and more everyday and seems to like your lips a lot more too

you don’t realize that you’re slowly starting to like him too but every time your friends talk about guys and dating you immediately think of mark (uwu bc y’all are besties)

mark finally asks you out on a day in the summer but he’s super nervous and fidgety that you kinda thought he was gonna break some big bad news to you like ‘i’m moving out’

but he actually asks you to date him and you’re like shocked for a bit just sitting there with your ice cream tub in front of the tv watching tom and jerry and he thinks you’re about to reject him before you nod rapidly

literally no one is fazed when y’all announce it to your friends, and they all saw it coming (hyuck and chenle had a bet on who would ask who out and hyuck won a whole 45 dollars)

renjun

responsible roommate

let’s be real, y’all did not get along when y’all first moved in together

renjun was literally the polar opposite of you, liking his space and reading and painting an awful lot, well he’s a fine arts major so, while you’re a little more on the extroverted side, inviting your loud friends over often

y’all had a fight like two days after he moved in about you always having friends over and then being loud and you try defending yourself but you kinda make a fool out of yourself because sweetie is right

a week of so after that you actually think about moving out because you think he like HATES YOUR GUTS and you kinda don’t talk to him at all for a bit

he feels bad after a while seeing you come home and just lock yourself in your room for like…the entire day before you get up early in the morning and leave + wants to make amends but his ego’s too big

ends up just cutting fresh fruit for you around like 2am since you were up doing work (with a frustrated brain) but accidentally walks in on you changing and drops the fruit all on the ground

you swear you’ve never seen a boy so RED before (or have you seen him apologize before) and he literally just STANDS THERE before closing the door

rethinks his entire life on what the HELL he just saw, and why he liked it so much but comes in after you tell him too (you’re kinda embarrassed too, you know, seeing the pretty pink undies hehe)

you apologize first about your friends and stuff though he feels bad for just yelling at you about it rather than like, talking like a normal person and he just is like ‘fancy some fruit?’

yeah, y’all kinda get closer after that, and he even lets you into his room (which was OFF LIMITS before), and you get to see his artwork which is wow phenomenal

y’all cook together and make it like it’s some kind of vlog (though y’all suck at that shit, so it’s just fake youtube), and the food ends up like pretty decent at the end

he doesn’t go to the same uni as you, but since you don’t leave early in the morning anymore, y’all walk together until you have to part ways

renjun has the dreamies over VERY RARELY but he goes out to their apartments often, he won’t admit it but he doesn’t want donghyuck to meet you because you might fall in love with him like everyone else seemed to

donghyuck does meet you though, and it’s safe to say that his flirting did not work on you! which was surprisingly relieving to renjun, and he didn’t even realize he was so relieved that you didn’t give a shit

you now only have your friends over whenever renjun’s not there just for the sake of him, but you usually go out instead too so…sometimes there’s an empty house bc y’all are way too considerate for each other

once you met him on your way back from your friend’s and it was like the spider-man meme like ‘boy, i left because of you’ and vice versa

there isn’t really a big hassle on chores in your apartment unless either of your families are coming for a visit because then it is..like renovating time

‘just take the couch out of the living room, it looks ugly’ + “bitch, where tf are they gonna sit then??’

he once got clothing stuck in the bottom of the washing machine and it was WALKING (i’m not kidding guys, this shit happens) + y’all had to call your landlord who wasn’t too happy

and talk about escalating the relationship..y’all are practically best friends by now even though you both are literal opposites

he doesn’t really ask you out like at all but gets all emotionally defensive when you’re about to go on a blind date that one of your friends set up for you

‘just go with me’

and you’re like…babe that’s not how it works but eventually you get the message (after a while) and you’re like ‘oh, you mean you actually want to go with me’

ends up taking you to the same cafe you were supposed to meet the other guy at and buys you food for the first time but kisses you with a spontaneous burst of confidence

but then it’s all flustered renjun™

jeno

feisty roommate

moved in with you bc you both are best friends and thought that y’all had ENOUGH time living in dorms on campus at uni

you literally don’t know how to deal with him at first because this boy is a messy mf and leaves everything everywhere which gets you all riled up

eventually you just threaten to throw his computer out the window if he doesn’t do the goddamn dishes once this semester and does them in fear

it worked the first few times but he saw it coming after a while and just threatened to throw you out the window, while holding half your body out of the fifth floor window

let’s just say the neighbors probably thought you were being abused from your screams, and it was proven when cops showed up at your doorstep about an hour later

that was probably the most terrifying and awkward conversation you had ever had with someone, even though it was mostly jeno talking to them while you were standing slightly behind him with your hand on the sleeve of his jacket

they eventually left and you almost cried because you were so scared you were gonna get arrested for no reason, and because you were too broke to bail yourself out of a jail and jeno was like ‘yeah it happens’

well, he didn’t hold you out of a window again, that was for sure but he made sure to take his time out of playing games and doing work to do some chores so you wouldn’t be doing all of them

jeno doesn’t mind your friends over, though he hates it when one of them try to hit on him even as a joke, and the last time that happened, you ended up just kicking her out because you were so fed up

dreamies come over pretty often actually, and raid your kitchen too which is sad because your stock of cheap alcohol is gone is less than a few minutes

they once all ended up drunk and on the floor of your living room except for jisung, who had been forbidden to drink, and you ended playing cards with him for like two hours before jeno dragged him out of your room

he didn’t invite them over for a month after that because he thought jisung hit on you (the literal high schooler, smh) but didn’t tell you that so you just thought he was mad at them

takes you clothing shopping with him because he has no fashion sense and doesn’t want to admit it to jaemin but you both usually end up at a fast food restaurant eating fries

you both are allergic to cats, but he has three and they’ve grown on you

cooking is usually rare in your apartment, but there always seem to be so many FUCKING DISHES, jeno usually just orders food for the both of you over weekends and breaks while slowly realizing he’s gonna go into debt if he keeps buying sm food

you start playing overwatch because him (which actually just started out as you being curious on how to play) and now you’re hooked, and he’s jealous because you’re actually good

ends up fighting for his computer back because you kept using it, but let you for a while bc he kinda found it cute seeing you sitting in his huge gaming chair wearing oversized clothing and battling like a boss

he doesn’t regret ever moving in with you bc it’s earned him some very interesting experiences that he couldn’t really trade for the world

his heart does a thing when he finds you asleep at his desk past midnight, and isn’t really sure if he should wake you up or not but ends up tucking you into his bed and he takes home on the couch

anyway the couch was fucking COLD but you woke up literally in his scent, and damn were you confused but you found him in the living room under a thin blanket

yeah, you scold him for that because he catches a cold and he’s a whole baby when he’s sick

okay, he’s like barely sick but he’d be like ‘y/n help me, i can’t get up’ and you get all worried bc he looks so tired but he just wants the care (evil jeno hehe)

you feel bad bc it was kinda your fault that he had to sleep on the couch and you apologize while bringing him food and stuff and his heart does a thing again and he’s like..this is my best friend, i’m a fucking idiot

yeah but he’s in love with you, it’s just a matter of time before one of you confessed

donghyuck

bratty roommate

hyper king who was the pretty but loud boy in one of your classes + he asked you to move in with him when he overheard you talking to a friend about needed to move out of the dorm

he didn’t actually think you’d take him seriously, but is glad because he has a bit of a crush on you and is planning on making you fall for him

you know the drill already though, he’s the guy that everyone falls for, so you’re determined not to!!

donghyuck is the definition of a brat, and pulls pranks on you constantly which you always innocently fall for, marking his happiness

you get him back though, filling his shampoo bottle with hair dye that he actually falls for (and you know it from the screech that comes from the bathroom around 3am)

but you’re back in class and he looks like a hot mf with this silver hair, making you regret the fact that you bought silver instead of red

donghyuck actually falls harder and harder for you though, though he’s trying to keep up his whole playboy fanatic and it’s getting hard for you

he sucks at basic things though, and runs away when you tell him it’s his turn to do the dishes (like, he runs out of the apartment)

dreamies are over, but not that much, you kinda think chenle and renjun hate your guts from the way they always eye you (also since you don’t hesitate to kick their asses out)

donghyuck prefers going out too, and planning very intricately how to make your life more miserable!!

is good at cooking but he’s too flirty to actually get anything done without you threatening to stab his eyes out

overheard you complaining to your friend one day over the phone about how hyuck is such a nuisance and basically you’re thinking about moving out because he’s so fucking HARD to live with

gets a little sad knowing that you just see him as annoying and tones down his bratty behavior to a record breaking low (i swear, it’s almost impossible) and you think he’s possessed

comes home one day to you watching a horror movie in the living room with the lights off and you get frightened out of your wits and even start crying

he’s like ‘fuck’ and thinks you’re hurt or something and gets all cuddly and is like ‘babe, what’s wrong??? who hurt you??’

ends up finding out you’re drunk, because you kept sobbing loudly about the guy that stood you up for a date and from the half empty vodka bottle

gets kinda pissed that someone really stood you up which caused you to drink away your feelings (well, you had other issues as well, but the date was a main component) and he’s actually genuinely worried

tries to get you water when you start coughing but you just cling onto him and tell him not to go away and he swears his heart stopped from the way you looked at him with pleading eyes and a pout

‘i’ll never leave you’

pretty sure he’s in love with you by the next day, and doesn’t fail to let you know by trying to flirt very successfully but you just think it’s hyuck back with his antics again

yeah, it’s not, sweetie’s in love with you and you finally get it!! after a really long time because you have trust issues and hyuck seemed to flirt with everyone before, though now…it happened only with you..wow??

he doesn’t ask you out, and kinda thinks that’s overrated so he just kisses you and well you like it

jaemin

sweetheart roommate

jaemin is the bestest boy on this planet, no one can tell me otherwise

though you guys moved in together because of a roommate switch up with your landlord, you two didn’t really mind it all that much bc y’all got along well!!

the two of you have a pretty calm and very ‘roommate’ kind of relationship because it takes both you a little while to break out of your shells a little bit

it took you a both a month, but the respectfulness of ‘no, i’ll do the dishes’ turned to a more of a friendship at first, though jaemin would admit he saw you as a little more than that, a best friend!!

has a daily order of coffee to your apartment three times a day and offered you a sip once and you could’ve sworn it was the liquified version of the souls in hell

he cooks for you 🥺 mainly because he trusted you next to a stove and ended up regretting it so

y’all go to the same uni too, so the walks there aren’t silent anymore!! before, it was just a side-by-side walk while you both had earbuds in

now that the two of you were closer, he basically treated you like you were his girlfriend and the dreamies didn’t fail to notice that

has a habit of pecking your cheek as a goodbye, which hyuck sees and is like ‘friends don’t do that!!!’ and jaemin’s like ‘we aren’t friends, we’re more than that.’

he meant y’all were BEST FRIENDS but hyuck now thought you two were fucking behind closed doors and made sure to mention it to all the dreamies too

yeah, jaemin doesn’t have hyuck over anymore, if anyone, it’s usually jeno or jisung who are usually more considerate on the fact that you live there and don’t bother you

your parents came to visit one day and fell in love with jaemin, especially your mom, who told you that he is husband material, well she’s not wrong.

bought you colored pencils after you lost all of them at uni, and got really hyped seeing how happy you were because of that and bought you a lotta stuff after that

like it wouldn’t even be planned, like he’d see something while shopping and would be like…’yes this is SO y/n’ and ends up buying it for you

people at uni probably think y’all are married from the way y’all argue about socks being left all over the apartment, which usually leads to one of you feeling bad and apologizing to the other

helps you with homework and even offers to write your essays when your sick or not in the mood, though he refuses your help like it’s second nature because he doesn’t want to ‘bother you’

doesn’t even realize he’s in love with you until jeno jokingly says he wants to ask you out and he gets all stiff and is straight up like ‘no, bro, that’s not cool’

ends up asking you out because he’s scared one of the dreamies would do it before him and you say no at first because you think he’s high or some shit but he’s being real

yeah and then the fucking behind closed doors becomes a reality

chenle

dumbass roommate

i’m not kidding, he blasts music at 4am thinking that you’re asleep and you ARE until you hear the music

the apartment is HUGE, it belongs to him, but put out the second room for low rent because he was lonely and tbh it was a pretty good size for the price

you thought he was a little annoying at first because the dreamies would literally be over all the fucking time because they were in love with the apartment, and both of y’all just didn’t along with each other’s friends

well, you just avoided them interacting with him because he was kinda a lil embarrassing at first, and you thought he was immature (he’s only a year younger though…)

he’s really passionate about music though, and has a wholeass piano in the corner of the living room that you’re not allowed to touch, but you’re so fucking tempted to

can’t do any chores for shit, and doesn’t really try until he sees you washing the dishes and is like ‘this is no good’ and hires a cleaning lady, he doesn’t make you pay extra though, which makes you happy

accidentally used your perfume instead of his own for about a week and smelled like vanilla all day everyday until you noticed that he was the reason why the bottle was disappearing liquid by the day

took you to an arcade when you were really stressed one day and this boy is competitive, so that was a whole RIDE but it was fun to actually hang out with him without arguing or starting a roommate war

yeah, y’all had a whole roommate war, if he was gonna blast music, you were gonna do it too and no one could complain to the landlord because the place literally belongs to him

watches movies with you, even the weird cheesy ones which he usually just makes stupid comments on, or even horror movies where he’s like…‘this bitch asked for death, so she’s gonna get it’

pranks you but not really badly, knows you’re scared of spiders and buys a bunch of plastic ones and puts them in the cupboards to hear you scream in fear in the morning

the cops showed up at your door too because the neighbors complained about noise, but you both had fallen asleep in the living room before they nearly threatened to break down the door and chenle woke up

dreamies tease him about you as well (like their bitchasses will), but they don’t really think anything’s gonna happen because you’re older but that is WRONG

y’all both have different tastes when it comes to food, but he still manages to take everything you buy for yourself even though he’s the rich one

teaches you how to play the piano one day and his heart does a thing when you lean your head on his shoulder for a brief second, babe thinks he’s falling for you

which is right, and he’s pretty obvious about it like you’d be just cooking wearing some sweats and he’d be creepily watching from the living room thinking you’re gorgeous and you’re like ‘tf is wrong with you, headass’

yeah, it takes him a while to confess because he’s nervous and doesn’t really have much experience in this kinda field (asks jisung too, but that boy literally knows less than him so)

tries to be all romantic with food and shit but he makes a mess and you find it frustratingly cute and judging from the way he was looking at you, you thought he was about to pull out a million dollar ring and propose to you

‘CAN YOU BE MY GIRLFRIEND’

jisung

cutie roommate

you both moved out of your parent’s houses senior year even though y’all hadn’t even graduated yet, but you didn’t think you could deal living with your four silblings and parents for another year

y’all are best friends, and probably do everything together too unless one of you are under a lot of stress because of school work (which might lead to a soft night of like, building forts or movies)

jisung is a mESSY PERSON but y’all clean together, like if it’s time to do the dishes, y’all are doing that together, one person washes while the other ones dries or even cleaning the living room, like y’all have designated cleaning days

you both have your friends over pretty rarely since it’s y’alls dorm uwu, not theirs and you know hell as well all they gonna be doing is stealing food

wears your clothes but by accident, like you might’ve mixed in a shirt or two along with his laundry and he’s wondering why tf it’s so fucking tight on him but still wears it until you’re like…jisung what the fuck

gives it back to you but it’s all stretched out now so :( but he lets you wear his sweatshirts!!

there’s a nice lil rooftop to the dorm that no one really seems to use other than you two, but y’all usually go up there to escape from the real world, like you come home and sungie isn’t there, check the roof! he’s probably crying his eyes out!!

just kidding, jisung doesn’t cry, he’s a tough baby

all jokes aside, you both stress over exams and classes together, and drink a hell of a lot of coffee too (the machine broke one week, and y’all were too broke to buy another one immediately so y’all saved up while dying inside)

cooking…doesn’t really happen though there is a kitchen, maybe if the dreamies are over and renjun’s in charge, but other than that, y’alls parents send you food or you order stuff

you get a part-time job after a while bc you don’t wanna bother your parents and you come home at like 10pm and babe is already so worried since you didn’t pick up the whole and begs you to quit

you don’t, but he starts working too and you both suffer together!!

y’all have a surprisingly clean apartment, but jisung’s room is another dimension that you cleaned one day he was out for work

he came back and walked into his room, and almost walked out because he genuinely thought he walked into the wrong dorm until he sees you

this boy sleeps everywhere too, but everywhere he’s not supposed to sleep, under the carpet in the living room, in the bathtub, even out on the balcony in the summer once and you thought he died in the morning

you both take walks in the neighborhood together on the weekends, like scheduled regularly occurring walks that even the old lady next to the chinese place says hi to you on saturdays

y’all aren’t even sure when it turned from a friendship to a relationship, though you’re pretty sure it was because of a petty fight over school or something that just lead to him confessing very loudly

it was kinda scary hearing him shout but y’all both realize what he just said and…damn

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ziracona · 4 years

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So last night I wound up reading Amanda's wiki and It made me kind of sad for her, because it very much sounds like she was suffering from stockholme syndrome of a kind there, to me, atleast. Which makes me wonder, what do you think of the pig/amanda? What's your Amanda like in your stories? Do you think she had any potential for redemption (with A LOT of work)? I guess I just wanna hear your thoughts on her character because ur always rly good at it?? - Sleepy

Yeah, whoever wrote the Saw wiki loves Amanda and hates Hoffman and it’s genuinely hilarious. They make a lot of assumptions (like that her motive for killing Adam after he won his game was mercy killing, which is a throughly unconfirmed opinion), and use the most sympthetic & extreme language possible. I’ve watched all the Saw films, and as a character, Amanda is a very enjoyable villain, but as a person? She’s a truly awful human being. (Side note—this typed last— So, mentioning certain Saw characters sends me flying into a rage like a D&D berserker, so this is gonna get angry as hell, but 0 of it is at you. I love you. This is at the Jigsaw squad. WHO I FUCKING HATE. Ahem. Anyway. Felt like the level of unbridled and sudden fury needed a heads up lol.) It’s not Stockholm syndrome. In Saw one, she’s a victim who is put in a reverse beartrap and forced to either die, or cut the key out of the stomach of a paralyzed by drugs but very alive (which she knew) other kidnap victim, whom she cut open and killed. After enduring that trauma and barely surviving, she immediately accepted John’s offer to join him. She was not forced, she was not tricked. He asked, and because she wanted to feel special and important, she agreed to inflict suffering she knew goddamn well the horrible level of on others first hand, and went willingly. She is self-centered to her core, and became dependent on and infatuated with John, and obsessed with his approval. She kidnapped Adam and Lawrence with him, who were kidnapped for fuckall reason (literally John just thought photography was pathetic) and for almost cheating on his wife (lol this was John’s ‘stated’ reason—his real reason was John is the world’s pettiest bitch, and Lawrence was the doctor who told him he had cancer. I’m not fkn kidding he’s that level of petty self-absorbed, self-righteous bastard) respectively. Then killed Adam after he won his game, which should have given him freedom but John reneged on like he always does like the pissy little bitch he is, Amanda killed him for reasons up to speculation. However, given John usually tests people who win a second time or tries to get them to join or some bullshit, it’s more plausible to assume her motive was seeing him as a threat than that it was mercy killing, and it’s only stated in-film to be an emotion based decision, not her actual movtive. Everyone’s opinion on this action is just that—opinion. With varying degrees of factual basis behind the educated level of educated guess.

In Saw 2, she helps John kidnap a bunch of drug addicts like herself who all got false arrests by the same officer at one time or another, along with a poor fucking 15 year old whose crime is having that cop for a dad. She then spent the next two hours watching people whose only crime was drug use, like herself, die horribly of organ deterioration, knowing at any time she could have stopped it and saved them all because she knew how to get the antidotes. Bitch even holds one girl in her arms and stokes her head and pretends to care about her while she hacks up deteriorated lung and blood and fucking dies, when at any moment she could have chosen to let her live. Literally no one should be more sympathetic to them than her. She knows how addicted to drugs feels, and the help you need. Anyway, she doesn’t, she lets them die and plays with them, and then when it’s to her, the 15 year old—who multiple times saves or helps her when hurt by other participants, and is nothing but kind—and one other man, the man shows up to kill her to get an antidote, and the poor fucking 15 year old child kills him with a saw to save her, traumatizing himself to a breakdown afterwords, and instead of being even thankful, she attacks and knocks him out, ties him up and attaches an oxygen tank so he won’t suffocate, and locks him in a fucking like tiny ass safe to be a game piece for another trial and leaves him there. His dad, who admittedly needs to serve jail time but isn’t a fucking murderer at least & does love his son, shows up distraught looking for his kid he’s afraid is dead, and she sneak attacks and takes him down, then leaves him chained up in a nasty lost bathroom to starve slowly to death, and doesn’t even do him the decency of telling him his kid isn’t dead. When he breaks his foot to get free and comes hobbling wounded after her, she sneak attacks again and he nearly wins, but she fucks up his broken foot and starts to leave, then comes back and beats him (she thinks) to death becuase he said she would never be Jigsaw, and she’s that petty and proud. Kid never gets to know what happened to his dad, and even alive, will definitely die young from the complications one, you know, gets from almost dying of chemical organ deterioration.

In Saw 3, the main victim is a man whose kid was lost in a hit and run. Jigsaw has Amanda kidnap his wife because she’s a surgeon and also was once not as sympathetic as he thought she should be when talking to him about his cancer at the hospital (I’m not even fucking exaggerating—side note, I will beat John Kramer to death myself with my huge fucking meat fists and laugh as I watch his bones crumble to dust). This poor bitch just lost a kid, then separated from her husband because he was a fucking mess consumed with revenge against the poor college kid who accidentally hit his son & totally withdrew from the world, and she wakes up with a collar filled with shotgun shells basically a 360 gun blow off your head collar deal on, and Amanda wheeling her around in the wheelchair she’s tied to. They tell her if she keeps John alive until the person being tested finishes his test, she can go free. The whole movie, Amanda keeps trying to convince John to kill the poor woman even though she complies just because she’s a throughly selfish, petty, conceited, self-pitying bastard with no regard for others, and wants this “Bitch” to die for fun. She feels she’s a threat for John’s attentions, and John isn’t even romantically inclined toward her, but she’s obsessed and doesn’t care. Amanda decides between Saws 2 and 3 that people aren’t fixable—even though she herself was supposedly “helped” by her Jigsaw game and this is hypocritical as fuck—and just starts straight up fucking torture murdering for fun. To the point even John thinks she has to be stopped. Like if John fucking Kramer thinks you’ve gone to far? Jesus help you because no one else can. She still does the torture, but instead of like, chopping off your own hand with a paring knife and getting to live, you chop it off and then still slowly get your head crushed between two beams being screwed closer and closer together. She kills Kerry for fuckall reason except she wants to (Kerry is a detective who did jack shit wrong—she was just on the case. It’s utter bullshit). Kidnaps her, straps a thing with hooks in her ribs that will tear out her rib cage when a timer runs out, and kill her that way, and had her hung up above the ground tied by chains, and tells her if she burns her hand up in a bottle of acid to get the key at the bottom which is hard period in the suit—never mind losing the hand—she can live. And Kerry fucking does, ruins her hand, unlocks the lock, and the suit won’t come off becuase the cunt rigged it. Then Amanda shows up to watch her die for fun just to smile smugly at her and watch her fear. Because she’s a fucking soulless, sadistic, evil, self-centered, self-important asshole.

Obsessed dad let’s a fucking bystander whose only crime was seeing a hit and run and running off freeze to death stripped naked and sprayed with water in a freezer slowly, saves a judge who gave too weak a sentence to the hit and run kid after the man begs, and then lets the poor fucking college kid who did it and already feels awful get his arms twisted till they snap off, legs twisted till the same, and then his head twisted around back so far it twist snap kills him. The rack is fucking beyond inhumane death. Amanda monitors this while threading Lynn (the poor doctor lady) for fun and crying over poow wittwe John who is dying of cancer (thank you god for doing what we couldn’t), and being miserable. Eventually, Hoffman sends her a letter saying if she doesn’t kill Lynn, he’ll tell John that she was one of the people there to steal drugs the night his wife got injured and miscarried (he probably already knew 🙄), and becuase Amanda cares about nothing more than Amanda, she fucking monolgauges at John about how special and sad she is how he needs to fix her and she’s a murderer but she doesn’t care because you know—she’s depressed : ( so she gets a pass for her self she’s UwU sad so her poor little crisis can have a massive torture body count bc she’s that special UwU and why is Lynn not gonna die even though she did her job!??? So unfair! No one changes kill them all but tell me I’m special I’m symapthetic because I’m sad and that makes it fun for me to tear people’s ribs out :’( —and then she fucking shoots Lynn becuase she cares less about an innocent woman’s life than the potential for John to be mad at her :’-( you know—such symapthetic stuff! And then John is like “Ok then fkn die :’(“ and Jeff/unstable dad/Lynn’s husband runs in and shoots her and then kills John.

Anyway! I fucking hate Amanda with a passion, and John. I cannot stand humans who hurt each other for fun, especially when they target those who most need help. But above all I cannot abide a person who is a sadistic, selfish, wholly self-absorbed fuck of a human, and refuses to take any responsibility for their actions or admit how fucking bad they are and has the goddamn nerve to act like a victim. Like if you’re going to be an evil son of a bitch, at least have the decency to admit it. If you’re a self-pitying “im uwu special and sad and better and more important than everyone else” —double points for “& becuase I am attractive I can get away with being a soulless shit without any being held accountable” from fandom or the media itself, tripple if from both—? I will kill you myself. I will rip out your eyes and chew on them. I will kill my self on a bomb to take you too. I will chew off my left arm for the sole purpose of getting to beat you to death with it. The wiki writer bends over back so bad they’re gonna need a brace the rest of their life to make her sound sympthetic, but they’re just a fan. She’s not. At all. She doesn’t have Stockholm, and I see people say “she got manipulated and used : (“ all the time, but without fail so far it’s people who think she’s hot and just want a reason to stan that because somehow a hot white woman with short hair even if canonically infatuated with John Kramer is somehow both a lesbian, and excusable for every horrible torture murder she ever did to feel uwu special in her depressed sad times. She wasn’t manipualated. It happened fast, she wasn’t courted into it, and she didn’t even hesitate to say yes. He offered her an out, made sure she was serious, and she stayed. And then she escalated to the point John took her out to stop her, because it was worse than what he wanted to do. I enjoyed her as a villain but as a person I fucking hate Amanda, and don’t really want to see her get another chance. Bastard doesn’t deserve one. I can’t say there’s no continuum in which she could never improve or be redeemed becuase who the fuck knows, and I like to think there’s a smidgen of hope for anyone, but that said, I do think the more evil you willfully do, the more you lose your humanity, and you can hit a point there’s just no person left. So. Anyway, hah, I don’t think she’s redeemable and frankly don’t want her redeemed. I want to burn her to death myself if I have to die that way too. Also! This was a wildly angry answer but none of it is directed at you. That wiki writer does make her sound symapthetic, I’ve read the wiki too—just I go into a blind rage any time John or Amanda is even mentioned and it takes me a half hour to come back down. I fly into a rage. If I ever go into anaphylactic shock, all a friend has to do is start mentioning the names of Saw villains and my adrenaline will start pumping like jet fuel and I’ll be fine. I just have a whole lot of righteously just rage at horrible awful self-righteous self-absorbed malicious manipulative dehumanizing self-pity bastards who take 0 responsibility for their evil or admit it, and Amanda & John are two at the way top of that rage list. It’s a dark but powerful headspace when I think of them. I become very powerful...but also very enraged. Lol, anyway, here’s the breakdown you didn’t need, but it is throrough!

#ask #Sleepy #anonymous #Saw #dead by daylight #Amanda Young #Saw 2 #Saw 3 #spoilers #side note! I have friends who /do/ love her as a character—I ain’t got beef with her existing or smth. or people who enjoy or love her #I like my fair share of horrible villains. I love Rafe from Uncharted 4 & he’s a certified piece of shit.#the only thing that gets me is people who try to be like ‘🥺 : ( but she’s a pwetty white woman w short hair which = lesbian /queen/! & makes #her exempt from all responsibility of torture murder. 💕💖 bc she’s so special and she was sad : ( I hc she dissociates so how can people not #love her if I pretend she doesn’t know what she’s done when canonically that’s not the case but I still think it? why do you not adhere to #my personal head canon making her sympthetic. : ( She’s pretty so she deserves 0 guilt or punishment. pwetty sad poor little baby girl : (#needs love. TuT No badness ever wum? she isn’t responsible for her own actions what u mean an adult is responsible for their choices even if #sad?? :0 No. I don’t understand you can love terrible characters so I have to snap my back in half trying to pretend she did nothing wrong’#because I have uhhhh seen it more than I wish despite my best efforts & im so goddamn tired :’)#sorry Sleepy this is like #one of my top 10 ‘I’m flyinn into a rage’ buttons I can’t help it I hear John or Amanda’s names & I see red #and can’t stop until the Justice and Judgement cards of life’s tarot deck are done punting me back and forth like a racquetball

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oscar-mildes · 4 years

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elvira you know I always see what you're hiding in the tags,, I will always read it if you answer all of them abhsjdbs

nev you asked for this and im going to go thru with it bc im an oversharing idiot like oh you asked me how’s the weather i will tell you about all my trauma instead :D

What do you identify as and what are your pronouns? i’m cis yo i’m she/her. i’m biromantic ace. thats the label i would put on it i guess. i really just refer to myself as gay bc i like pretty boys who look like girls and pretty girls and pretty nb and queer people and basically i just like pretty people ajsfbjf

How did you discover your sexuality, tell your story? theres no story to it. no epiphany or realization. i just always was ok with thinking that girls were pretty and that gay people are cool and it wasnt until recent years that i was like oH SHIT AM I GAY

Have you experienced being misgendered? What happened and how did you overcome it? no i guess bc i’m a girl and id as a girl and have a very obvious girl body

Who was the first person you told, how did they react? i guess my best friend. we’re both very ok with gay shit and we just always made comments about pretty girls and now we’re both pretty gay. i like my big tiddie anime girls and she likes her pretty kpop girl bands

Describe what it was like coming out, what did you feel? i’ve only “come out” to some of my friends. i would NEVER in my LIFE even imagine telling my mom i like girls. shes homophobic Like That

If you’re out, how did your parents/guardians/friends react? uhh see above. my mom, stepdad, family members are all homophobic. hispanics in general are Like That rip. i think my dad would be the most ok with it but he lives in mexico and i dont talk to him often anyway. doesnt matter

What is one question you hate people asking about your sexuality? i hate when people ask me about the ace part. like they have a bigger problem about my not wanting to have sex over the liking girls part tbh. sometimes it’s difficult for me to even describe where i am on the ace spectrum. it’s honestly the more difficult part

Describe the style of clothing that you most often wear. basic nerd. you know those fics like “she dressed in a black t-shirt, skinny jeans, and all star converse” yea that she is me

Who are your favourite lgbt+ ships? ajkfj this is a good question and canon wise i love Ash and Eiji from Banana Fish, Uenoyama and Mafuyu from Given, Nezumi and Shion from No. 6, and Simon and Baz from Carry On. Not canon i love Kurama and Hiei from Yu Yu Hakusho, Izuku and Todoroki from My Hero Academia, and Inosuke and Tanjiro from Demon Slayer. Note how most of them are anime i

What does makeup mean to you? Do you wear any? i dont really wear any bc im lazy. if you like it you do you but idrc for it? except for lipstick i LOVE lipstick i have all the colors. i wear it so it distracts people from the rest of my face

Do you experience dysphoria? If so, how does that affect you? ...no

What is the stupidest thing you’ve heard said about the lgbt+ community? i live in the south so ive heard tons of shit talk about gay people. i dont really have any that stand out. my mom just likes to say that we’re going to hell :D so let’s give em a show ay

What’s your favourite thing about the lgbt+ community? i guess i like how we find solidarity in each other just bc we’re not straight. most of the lgbt+ folks i know are pretty chill about everything

What’s your least favourite thing about the lgbt+ community? terfs but they dont count

Have you ever been to your cities pride event? Why or why not? i live in a small town and i could never sneak out of my house for that bc i still live with my mom so no

Who is your favourite lgbt+ Icon/Advocate/Celebrity? theres so many big celebrities now that id as lgbt+ but im going old school and loving my man, my tumblr url namesake mr Oscar Wilde. my man got put in jail for sodomy

Have you been in a relationship and how did you meet? lmao never bc im mean, ugly, and terrible at talking to people irl. i had a bf in middle school? but bc i was 12 i dont count it

What is your favourite lgbt+ book? Carry On and the sequel Wayward Son. (very anxiously waiting for book 3 Anyway the Wind Blows come on Rainbow Rowell)

Have you ever faced discrimination? What happened? for being gay? no. bc im not really out. ive faced discrimination for being a brown woman tho :)))

Your Favorite lgbt+ movie or show? yall i love gay anime: Given, Banana Fish, No. 6, Yuri on Ice yeee. i dont really watch tv with real people but i think that Brooklyn 99 does a very good job with Holt and Rosa yall im love Rosa

Who are some of your favourite lgbt+ bloggers? theres bloggers??? um idk i love u nev so you count right @why-do-you-pick-flowers

Which lgbt+ slur do you want to reclaim? for a while everyone was mad as hell about “im gay for ___” and idk im gay for everything so thats a “slur” i use for myself

Have you ever gone to a gay bar, or a drag show, how was it? ive never gone omg i’d probably be intimidated as hell like i have a lot of problems just existing so to be existing around very flamboyant and extravagant people like that makes me break into a nervous sweat

How do you self-identify your gender, and what does that mean to you? ive always felt like a girl even tho my mom always said “oh you like boy things??? you should have been born a boy” but like, your likes and dislike dont determine your gender. i like “boy” things and “dress like a boy” but i dont FEEL like a boy. ive never had any desire to become a boy or id as a boy. gender is a social construct fuck society

Are you interested in having children? Why or why not? i have a very complicated relationship with children. babies are ugly and toddlers are annoying but i feel like if i had children i would love them obviously because theyre mine. this is gonna be a weird analogy but like i dislike cats. BUT i have cats. and i love the fuck outta them. so i feel like thatd be me with kids. but im ace so like.... who would even have kids with me. i could not. pregnancy seems like a hassle and adoption is... i have thoughts on that but thats for a different post. also i can see myself being married and not having children OR having kids without a spouse. theres just something complicated about having both??? maybe im just fucked in the head idk bro

What identity advice would you give your younger self? you dont hate girls you like them, dumbass

What do you think of gender roles in relationships? fuck gender roles. get pegged, bros. i also have a very specific dynamic if i ever got into a relationship (which you know. wont happen) but like if i dated a guy i feel like i’d be very top. a MAN telling ME what to do??? fuck that. but if i dated a pretty girl??? top me pls

Anything else you want to share about your experience with gender? i think ive already said too much oh god someone is gonna look at this and be like what the FUCK but like lmao dont be afraid to ask me i apparently have no shame

What is something you wish people know about being lgbt+? it’s scary at first because you think “im not normal” but like pray tell me what is normal. do what makes you happy. fuck society

Why are proud to be lgbt+? i’m comfortable with the people i like. i might not be very confident and i have depression, anxiety, self esteem issues, probs adhd or ocd idfk but at least i know if i see a pretty girl or smth im gonna be like wow that girl is pretty and have no bad thoughts about it. it’s just how it be. after a lot of dissecting my past behavior, ive always been this way. you cant change who you are. just accept it

#asks #nev you asked for this #oversharing??? me??? never #lgbt stuff #im gay yall

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surveys-at-your-service · 4 years

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Survey #255

“who gives a fuck if they hate you; you’re the god that they pray to.”

How many pillows do you sleep with? Two. Could you go a day not talking to the last person you kissed? It would suck. What was the last song you listened to that made you cry? I didn't like, sob, but "Another Life" by Motionless In White does it. Your ex REALLY needs you at 3am and you have a way to their house would you go? Well, I can't with Sara considering she lives two hours away, and that's by plane. If she lived here, duh. For Girt or Jason, yes. Without saying any names what is one thing that you would like to say to someone(s)? I'm sorry. Would your parents get mad if you got drunk while they were present? No. Would you date someone who lived in another state? Eh, maybe. I don't know if I want to do long-distance again. I mean I probably would, but idk. Are you friends with your ex? Sara and Girt, yes. Who is the person you last texted? Sara. When’s the last time you told people you were fine, but really weren’t? I dunno, I honestly don't lie about that often. When was the last time you wanted to punch someone in their face? Months back when I found out the shit my therapist said about me and disability. Not only did I want to knock her jaw off, but I sobbed for like, a long-ass time. Who did you spend your summer with last year? Just Mom, really. ... Or wait, maybe that was the summer Sara was here??? My memory is such shit, idk if that was last year or the one before. What’s bothering you right now? Stress about dropping out. Have you lost friends in the past year? I don't think so, at least. Have you and the last person you kissed ever talked about going out? We did date. If the person you’re dating said they were falling in love with you, what would you do? I'm not dating anyone. Who was the last person you were in love with for more than a year? Sara. Do you have a secret life? RP stays a pretty big secret. Have you ever seen the last person you kissed without a shirt? Yes. Do your parents know EVERYTHING about you? No. What are you watching? Nothing rn, surprisingly. I'm listening to music. Are you friends with your best friend’s boyfriend or girlfriend? She's single. Don’t tell me lies, is the last person you texted attractive? Yeah. There’s a serial killer in your house, what do you do? Jump out the window. If the last person you kissed went back to their first love, what would you do? I think I am hers. Do you own any bug spray? No, not currently. We need some damn wasp killer. Every spring/summer, they build a nest literally right above our back door. Are you a good gift giver? Honestly think I'm really good at it. I always try to put a load of thought into it. What's the longest trip you’ve ever been on? The drives to either NY or Florida. I can't remember which is further. Are you a daughter or son-in-law? No. Do you know anyone in the military? Multiple people. Do you like your significant other's siblings? N/A Have you ever received a singing birthday card? Yeah. Those always suck when you open them and boom, loud singing to an obnoxious song. Do you own anything made by APPLE? My iPod. Have you ever tried Hamburger helper? Yeah, that was a semi-frequent dinner as a kid. I never liked it that much, though. What was your first car's color? N/A Do you have a best friend? Ye. Do you remember who your Kindergarten teacher was? I do. Do you have a favorite president? A least favorite? No, considering I don't know enough about any and their policies. Can you french braid? No. Were you ever a girl scout or a boy scout? I was as a tiny kid. I met my first best friend that way. What's your least favorite color? I'm just gonna use the very basic colors: yellow or green. Do you know anyone in jail? Not currently. Do you have kids? Ew. What's the strangest name you’ve ever heard? Apples. Yes. I'm serious. How old were you when you learned to walk? Idk. Do you own anything made of lace? Yeah. What's your favorite football team? Idc. What kind of bubble gum do you chew? Just about any. Fruity is my favorite. Do you wear a one-piece bathing suit or two-piece, a speedo or trunks? NOBODY needs to see me in a two-piece. Did you go to your senior prom? Yes. Do you support a charity? Well of course. I used to give coins to those super-old charity things for sick kids back in the day, but I can't remember the exact charity it was. I also donated hair to Children With Hair Loss a couple years back. I haven't donated to any other that I know of bc no personal income and I don't ask my parents for money really, but boy have I wanted to. I always use that Facebook feature where you pick a charity to share and ask for donations for your birthday, though; I've done the Trevor Project and one for pancreatic cancer in honor of my grandmother. I don't remember the others. Do you pop your knuckles? EW no please don't in my presence @ Sara. Do you scrapbook? No. I just don't have the creative drive and dedication to. If you could change your eye color would you and to what color? A much brighter blue. Have you ever had braces? For a long-ass time because we couldn't afford to take them off. One tooth is pushed too far back because of it. Imagine your dream home, does it have a fence around it? No. I want to live in the woods where *that's* my yard. When were you the saddest in your whole life? 2016 OH WOWIE WOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Have you ever seen a ghost? I definitely believe I have. Are you a virgin? No. How many books do you read a month? I like, just started reading again, so I can't say. Can you type fast? Very. In school were you bullied? I'm extremely thankful I wasn't. Have you ever swam in the ocean? Yes, I love it. Do you own a boat? Not me myself, no. Dad does. What about a camper? No. Do you read the newspaper? No. Are you on any teams? Team Mystic in Pokemon Go *waggles fist @ criticism* If you died today where do you think you’d go? Idk. Who really knows what happens when you die. I hope it's some serene existence, but, *shrugs*. Do you know anyone who is pregnant? Ummmm I don't think so. Who is the first contact in your cell phone? Best friend! :') What color are you bed sheets? The one I'm using now is light blue. Do you use online dating? I cannot FUCKING believe I was briefly on Christian Mingle I would actually rather die- How often are you sick? Extremely rarely. Did/Do you miss a lot of school? Eh. I had my mental health days and had to leave early a lot. Do you like scented candles? Yeah man. When was the last time you were told you were pretty/beautiful/gorgeous? When I recently changed my FB picture after forever. Do you hate the last guy, other than family, you had a conversation with? No. What’s the last thing that made you laugh? Roman being silly. If someone were to ask you out right now would you say yes? I don't know. Do you have a secret that you’ve never told anyone? Yeah. Name four things you want right now: My fucking tattoo updated laksjdlflw, a healthy goddamn weight, my laptop, and a tarantula omg. Do you prefer to hold or be held? I mean, it depends on who we're talking about. I guess generally held? Are you currently wanting any piercings? You have no idea. Are you afraid of falling in love? Very. What was the last thing that made you feel like your life was complete? lol I've never felt that. You ever slept on the floor with someone you liked? Yeah. Do you still speak to any of your classmates from elementary school? Off the very top of my head, no. Does it take a lot to make you cry? NOPE. What is the wallpaper on your computer screen? Why did you choose it? One of my favorite pictures of Teddy, because I adore and miss him. Is there a pattern on the pants you’re currently wearing? Which one? Plaid. Do you like going to baby showers? Do you go only for the cake? I mean, not especially. They're crowded and it's a bad association anyway since it was the last time I hung out with Jason. The cake is indeed the best part, lmao. Mexican food, Chinese food, Italian food, French food or American food? American. What is the color scheme of your absolute favorite fast-food restaurant? Red, yellow, and blue. Do people ever ask you to do things they’re too short to accomplish? Very rarely. I'm not all that tall. Is there carpet or hardwood floor in your bedroom? Carpet. Do you believe in superstitious things such as breaking a mirror? No. Do you get sick of people who call themselves bipolar all the time? As someone who is bipolar, very much so, yes. Ever have an ultra-sound performed on you? What was it for? Yes, for my liver. I was fine. Do you like those "end of the world," "Armageddon" movies? Not especially. Ever been choked severely on something during lunch at your school? No. Do you remember who you sat next to in Kindergarten? Who was it? No. Has anyone ever compared you to an animal? Which one(s)? No. Do you eat more vegetables or fruits? What’s your favorite fruit/veggie? Fruits, by far. Strawberries and broccoli. Something on the human body that grosses you out the most: This is not intentional or meant to be discriminatory of those with 'em, but penises literally repulse me visually. Do you like meeting new people? What’s your most common greeting? Yeah, even though I'm scared. I think I say "hi" or "hey" most. What is something that bothers you about most surveys in general? Extremely heteronormative. Would you survive if zombies were to take over the world? Why or why not? HA no. I'm an anxious mess that is not fast or nimble in any way. What is your favorite color of apple? Red, green or yellow? I like the reddish/yellowish ones. Do you live anywhere near a mall? Maybe like, 15-20 mins away. If you were dying who would you say goodbye to first out of everyone? My mom. Are you someone who actually likes to babysit children? NO. What’s your favorite lunch meat, if you even like any in the first place? Honey ham. Would you rather write with a pen or a pencil? Why is this? Pencil, by far. You can erase. Scibbling stuff out looks messy. Have you ever wanted to be in a band? What position exactly? I am NOT kidding: one of the motivating factors of me going back to public school after 8th grade was the idea of making new friends and maybe making a band to be the guitarist lmfao. Who is your role model or hero in life if you have one? I have multiple for different reasons, but #1's gotta be Mark, man. Were you a really mean kid or a sweet and quiet kid? I was a really friendly kiddo. Do you keep secrets from your parents that you don’t keep from your friends? I don't think so. What is your father’s best friend’s name? Do you know them personally? Idk who that would be. Ever submit a video to America’s Funniest Home Videos? I don't believe we have. The most painful medical procedure you’ve ever had? Jesus fuck, I wouldn't wish having an infected cyst drained without NEARLY enough numbing medication on the goddamn devil. Are you someone who likes to eat Poptarts? What’s your favorite flavor? Yeah. I like the chocolate sundae one most. Ever have a dream you’re being abducted by aliens? Was it scary? No. What is your favorite flavor of Doritos? What do you drink with them? MMMMMMMMMMM cool ranch. Usually soda with chips. What is your favorite nickname you like to be called? Why do you like it? Ozzy. *shrugs* I like my online nickname and the "y" added sounds kinda affectionate ig. Do you already have your outfit for tomorrow planned out? I don’t plan my outfits. Has your favorite song ever been featured on a commercial? No. What would you say was the best year of your life? Why? 2017. SO MUCH DEVELOPMENT AND HEALING!!!!!!! Have you ever been pulled over by the cops for speeding? No. Is anyone in your family a firefighter? Who is it anyway? No.

#survey #quiz #questions #personal

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devilraised-blog · 7 years

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HELLO, HELLO, HELLO ! i’m ale and i’m casually just dead inside FLKDSF like, i have been sitting here watching hemlock grove for two days now ( don’t @ me for his last name i was inspired ) while eating kit kats, which might as well get this intro done while i do it ! so let’s get this show on the road then, lemme introduce you to lucian godfrey, a high class piece of shit. if you wanna plot, just hit that lil heart button and i’ll come to you or you’re welcome to come to me !

☾ —— have you met lucian godfrey, the twenty-seven year old cismale that looks a lot like dominic sherwood? he has been in the syndicate as a robber for three years now and is known around as the crimson, because he is debonair & nonchalant, as well as bellicose & morbid. not just a gang banger, zero is also a mechanic.

information.

lucian grew up in a very interesting situation. his mother, a wonderful woman full of love that wished to raise her son to be the same, had married a man who would bring nothing but destruction to her life. he had been wonderful to her at the beginning, giving her a son she had always wanted and a family she had never had. never been given love in her life, she chased it and held onto it, even if it wasn’t good for her. she believed him to be good, with all of her heart she believed it.

in the end of it, he wasn’t and it still didn’t deter her away from him. his mother had soon realized after the birth of her son that her now husband was a monster. she realized it, but had never done anything about it. he would come back and tell her he loved her, tell their son he loved him. as time went on, she wasn’t sure if he was capable of love. wanting to raise her son to be compassionate and kind, full of love--- the exact opposite of what her husband was and it started out that way.

lucian was a happy child, full of light and love, dichromatic hues shining brightly. it made his mother’s chest fill with hope that her son wouldn’t turn out like his father. she shielded him from the abuse, let herself take all the hits, let herself take his rage away from him. even if all his rage was directed at the young boy, wanting to know why he wasn’t strong, why he was so weak. that wasn’t his son, his line would be better than that.

the only way to make sure that happened, was to remove his mother from the equation and that’s what he did. killed her in cold blood thinking he would get away from it, he didn’t and he was sentenced to life in prison. but, lucian had gotten the short end of the stick. being alone in the world without his parents, his father being what he hated most, vowing he would never turn into him. vowing that he would make sure his mother would be remembered.

nothing ever turns out at is seems though. after her death and his sentencing, lucian was sent to live with his grandmother. but, the boy that was sent to live there wasn’t the boy who had left his childhood home. he was filled with rage and hatred towards his father and guilt when it came to his mother. the rage had overtaken him though, flooding his body until it was all he could think about. vowing that he wouldn’t be his father, that he wouldn’t be a monster. but rage overtakes someone, especially in lucian’s case.

following in his footsteps without even understanding it, at the age of fourteen, lucian had joined his first gang. instantly liking the unity it gave him to others, feeling like he finally had a family again. he was raised up from then on out to be cruel, taught how to hold a gun, how to fire, how to kill. the years after was where he earned his codename, ZERO. giving no victim time to say their goodbyes, lucian didn’t hesitate when it came to pulling a trigger. what he didn’t understand, so focused on his negative emotions, was that he was becoming his father.

the one thing he never wanted and finally, when he turned eighteen, he was busted. thrown into jail for being an accomplice to murder ( which one honestly ) and gang banging. lucian had spent five and a half years in prison, getting let out when he was twenty-three for good behavior. even if his behavior wasn’t anything close to being good, but he had connections on the outside and inside. one being his father, a fact he didn’t know.

a little while after he got out of prison, he ended up joining the syndicate as a robber because of his very trigger happy finger, not afraid to get his hands dirty as he had been doing for a long time. while being in the gang, he also works as a mechanic. enjoys working with his hands, even if he’s fantastic from far away, he’s also very nimble with his fingers.

along with that, it was recently that he had received a letter from his father, telling him how proud he is to see him in the gang life, that he was following in his footsteps and that has really shaken lucian. memories flooding back and bringing out a very ruthless side of him because he never wanted to be his father and now here he is.

SMALL TIDBITS ! he doesn’t love easily, especially now, afraid he’ll love someone to death like his father. he drinks and smokes a ton. loves the concept of death ? finds it very fascinating. he’s bisexual, loves any type of fucking with whoever is willing. is very good with a gun and essentially killing people. likes chocolate a lot, a good way to bribe him. he can be very physically affectionate when the time is right. most likely ! has a daddy kink don’t @ me !

personality.

lucian is not the best person in the whole world. before, what used to be a sweet, caring, kindhearted boy just looking for a little brightness in his life was completely taken over by this cruel, calculating, and cold person. he’s someone who get angry and real angry, reddening face with fists clenched and jaw tight angry. when he’s angry, there’s nothing that can stand in his way, he’ll tear you down bit by bit until he has what he wants. it makes him an excellent interrogator. he’s also known, despite his anger to be very calm. he’s not someone who’s necessarily fazed by anything, but if he doesn’t like something he’s going to be blunt about it. lucian is a charmer, he’ll use his words and suaveness to get things and manipulate people. he can be quite sarcastic, likes to joke more than anything unless you make him mad, get under people’s skin. and deep down, the bright boy is still there, but he’s definitely not coming out any time soon, he has a heart, but he hates showing it even if that would make him unlike his father--- he can’t escape him.

connections.

i need an ex for him tbh ? he’s not so into love, so this person would have meant a great deal to him.

def . .. ... want a cellmate from his time in prison. just a really good bond that the two have and they’ve just always had each other’s backs.

a best friend tbh ? bc that would be adorable and fantastic.

a ride or die ? partner in crime type sort of thing ? which can be taken quite literally. someone who sticks with his ass and the two either ride together or they die together.

any kind of hook-up, fling, fwb ? i’m def a sucker for these types of plots and since lucian doesn’t care much for relationships deeper than sex, he’d probs have a lot of these.

a cuddle buddy bc i’m a fucking sucker for sweet plots like this ? just cuddly and affectionate.

maybe a confidant of some kind ? someone that lucian can oddly trust and he doesn’t have a problem with it ? it can totally be some secret thing that no one knows they’re that close.

old friends from the old gang ? or even from school when they were younger. and it can kinda be an awkward thing or like i can’t believe we both ended up in this kinda thing.

hate fucks or enemies with benefits ? the two can’t fucking stand looking at each other unless it’s in the bedroom. and as much as they can’t stand each other, they can’t ignore the attraction.

a love/hate . . . like i’m so weak for these types of connections. bc they end up getting into so many arguments, but then get protective like i can only be mean to them wtf ?

good influence and a bad influence, the former being someone being one on lucian and the latter would be lucian influencing them to let that darker side out.

smth based off THIS ? where like this person tries to connect with lucian .. .but it doesn’t work and they keep doing their best and he keeps ignoring them

gIVE ME ANY NEGATIVE PLOT like rivals or enemies or annoyances or frenemies ? just to add some angst bc every char needs angst. plus .. . these are my fav types of plots tbh.

also anY OTHER PLOT U WANT like maybe will they/won’t they, a family connection somehow ? or an unrequited crush of some kind ? or someone who comes into his shop regularly bc their car is shit ?

#mon:intro #⟨ / / 𝑴𝑼𝑵 ▬ OOC : 𝐁𝐄𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐃 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐒𝐂𝐄𝐍𝐄𝐒. ⟩#abuse tw #idk love me nd this baby LKFJDS he needs it

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interstellarinfinity · 6 years

Text

I found another one of these

I found another questionnaire from a few years back so imma answer it now again (and I only answered ones that changed lmao)

1: Full name

Then: Madison Now: Madison

2: Age

Then: 16 Now: 19

3: 3 Fears

Then: thunderstorms, spiders, school Now: spiders, death, ending up alone

4: 3 things I love

Then: bands, books, God Now: Ivan, my sisters, music

5: 4 turns on

Then: don’t get turned on but… intelligence, good hair, beautiful eyes, sense of humor Now: Hands, lustful eyes, sweatpants, and this is super specific but Ivan has a grey shirt that makes me go nUTS for some reason

6: 4 turns off

Then: smells weird, rude, obnoxious, bad taste in clothes Now: rude, attention seeker, constantly correcting, thinks they’re always right

7: My best friends

Then: mikie, hannah, ellen, tom, lauren Now: Sophi, Ivan, my sisters

8: Sexual orientation

Then: straight/asexual Now: bisexual and not ace

9: My best first date

Then: haven’t had a good first date Now: my first date with Ivan (it was a breakfast date!!!)

10: How tall am I

Then: 5′1 Now: 5′1 & 3/4

11: What do I miss

Then: a lot of things Now: Ivan, my lyco friends, DPA, Ivan, Sophi, Ivan, Ivan, did I mention Ivan?

12: What time were I born

Then: 8:20 P.M. Now: 8:10 p.m. (I asked my mom and I was wrong before wtf)

13: Favourite color

Then: pink Now: pink

14: Do I have a crush

Then: YES Now: yeah cause bf

15: Favourite quote

Then: I have many Now: The greatest value in life comes from loving yourself for who you are

16: Favourite place

Then: Disney World Now: wherever Ivan is

17: Favourite food

Then: thin mints Now: mac and cheese and nugs

18: Do I use sarcasm

Then: yes Now: ofc

19: What am I listening to right now

Then: take flight by lindsey stirling Now: La Llorona from Coco (I can’t stop listening to the album help)

20: First thing I notice in new person

Then: hair Now: how they act with others

21: Shoe size

Then: 61/2-7 Now: 7

22: Eye color

Then: greenish/hazelish Now: they change a lot but primarily green

23: Hair color

Then: dirty blonde Now: dark blonde/red/brown

24: Favourite style of clothing

Then: sweater, leggings, combat boots Now: t-shirt, capri jeans, and converse/toms

25: Ever done a prank call?

Then: no Now: omg when I’m drunk yes

27: Meaning behind my URL

Then: starry night cause I love space, niall bc niall Now: idk it sounded cool

28: Favourite movie

Then: big hero 6 Now: Coco

29: Favourite song

Then: moon trance Now: I Miss Those Days by the Bleachers

30: Favourite band

Then: one direction Now: one direction

31: How I feel right now Then: happy Now: tired

32: Someone I love

Then: *** Now: Ivan

33: My current relationship status

Then: single as a pringle Now: happiest relationship I’ve ever been in

34: My relationship with my parents

Then: fantastic Now: fantastic (surprise)

35: Favourite holiday

Then: christmas Now: halloween

36: Tattoos and piercing i have

Then: none Now: traditional ear piercing

37: Tattoos and piercing i want

Then: cartilidge piercing and the cancer constellation tattooed somewhere Now: just the cancer constellation tattoo and a rose tattoo bc sorority

38: The reason I joined Tumblr

Then: it sounded fun Now: it sounded fun

39: Do I and my last ex hate each other?

Then: no Now: he can go to hell

40: Do I ever get “good morning” or “good night ” texts?

Then: heck no Now: heck yeah

41: Have I ever kissed the last person you texted?

Then: no Now: nope

42: When did I last hold hands?

Then: back in january with my ex Now: two weeks ago with Ivan :(

43: How long does it take me to get ready in the morning?

Then: like 20 minutes Now: if I’m not trying, 10. if i’m trying, an hour max

44: Have You shaved your legs in the past three days?

Then: no Now: nope but I NEED TO LADOINFAD

45: Where am I right now?

Then: my couch Now: my bed

46: If I were drunk; can’t stand, who’s taking care of me?

Then: no one i don’t get drunk Now: either my big or Ivan cause they’ve both had to do it

47: Do I like my music loud or at a reasonable level?

Then: reasonable level Now: both depending on mood

48: Do I live with my Mom and Dad?

Then: my mom yes Now: my mom yes

49: Am I excited for anything?

Then: disney world in 11 days Now: for Ivan to come back from Mexico

50: Do I have someone of the opposite sex I can tell everything to?

Then: yes Now: yes

51: How often do I wear a fake smile?

Then: 1/8 of the time Now: never

52: When was the last time I hugged someone?

Then: today Now: a few days ago

53: What if the last person I kissed was kissing someone else right in front of me?

Then: i wouldn’t care Now: there will be blood

54: Is there anyone I trust even though I should not?

Then: no Now: no idea

55: What is something I disliked about today?

Then: i have a migraine Now: people suck at work

56: If I could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be?

Then: lindsey stirling Now: niall horan

57: What do I think about most?

Then: someone Now: Ivan

58: What’s my strangest talent?

Then: picking up stuff with my toes (WTFFFFFF) Now: forgetting everything I’ve learned from a semester in an hour

59: Do I have any strange phobias?

Then: i’m afraid of thunderstorms Now: i have trypophobia? does that even count?

60: Do I prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it?

Then: in front of it Now: still in front but I enjoy photography

61: What was the last lie I told?

Then: … Now: that i don’t have sex LMAO

62: Do I perfer talking on the phone or video chatting online?

Then: neither Now: facetime!

63: Do I believe in ghosts? How about aliens?

Then: ghosts yes, aliens maybe Now: both

64: Do I believe in magic?

Then: i like to think it exists somewhere Now: there’s magic in love tbh

65: Do I believe in luck?

Then: not really Now: not sure tbh

66: What’s the weather like right now?

Then: sunny and breezy Now: cloudy night

67: What was the last book I’ve read?

Then: the elite Now: i’m in the middle of turtles all the way down

68: Do I like the smell of gasoline?

Then: yes Now: yup

69: Do I have any nicknames?

Then: maddio Now: maddio, mads, poopsy (thanks Ivan)

70: What was the worst injury I’ve ever had?

Then: almost breaking two of my fingers on two seperate occasions Now: ripping both my knees open, my hand, and my cheek

71: Do I spend money or save it?

Then: spend it Now: SPEND IT HOLY SHIT I CAN’T SAVE FOR SHIT

72: Can I touch my nose with a tounge?

Then: no Now: nope

73: Is there anything pink in 10 feets from me?

Then: yes my blanket Now: my jolly rancher plush (work perks)

74: Favourite animal?

Then: penguin Now: penguin

75: What was I doing last night at 12 AM?

Then: sleeping Now: probably watching youtube

76: What do I think is Satan’s last name is?

Then: no last name, he’s like madonna Now: doofensmirtz

77: What’s a song that always makes me happy when I hear it?

Then: i have many Now: hold on forever by rob thomas

78: How can you win my heart?

Then: just be kind and be honest with how you feel Now: same as before (wow past me had some wisdom)

79: What would I want to be written on my tombstone?

Then: idk Now: i got no idea

80: What is my favorite word?

Then: don’t have one Now: ?

82: If the whole world were listening to me right now, what would I say?

Then: *middle finger emoji* Now: fix yourself and love everyone

83: Do I have any relatives in jail?

Then: idk maybe one in tennessee Now: LIKE 5 IN TENNESSEE LMAOOOO

84: I accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow me with the super-power of my choice! What is that power?

Then: reverse time Now: stop time for everything around you and the people you’re with

85: What would be a question I’d be afraid to tell the truth on?

Then: idk Now: anything about my sex life if my mom asked

86: What is my current desktop picture?

Then: 1d concert picture Now: collage of my friends and family and me boy

87: Had sex?

Then: no Now: HELL YEAH

88: Bought condoms?

Then: no Now: yup

89: Gotten pregnant?

Then: no Now: nope

90: Failed a class?

Then: no Now: ALMOST LMAO

91: Kissed a boy?

Then: yes Now: yupp

92: Kissed a girl?

Then: no Now: when i’m drunk i do lmao

93: Have I ever kissed somebody in the rain?

Then: i wish Now: yeeeeees

94: Had job?

Then: no Now: i have two right now

95: Left the house without my wallet?

Then: yes Now: i literally did this on the way to work the other day lMAO

96: Bullied someone on the internet?: no

97: Had sex in public?

Then: hell no Now: oops

98: Played on a sports team?: sorta

99: Smoked weed?

Then: no Now: hehehehhehe yeah

100: Did drugs?: no

101: Smoked cigarettes?: no

102: Drank alcohol?

Then: like sips but not a whole glass or shot or anything Now: YUP I LIKE THE ALCHY

103: Am I a vegetarian/vegan?: no

104: Been overweight?: yes

105: Been underweight?: yes

106: Been to a wedding?: yes

107: Been on the computer for 5 hours straight?: yes

108: Watched TV for 5 hours straight?: yes

109: Been outside my home country?

Then: no Now; does canada count

110: Gotten my heart broken?: yes

111: Been to a professional sports game?

Then: yes Now: just went to my second one last fall!

112: Broken a bone?: No

113: Cut myself?: yes

114: Been to prom?: yes

115: Been in airplane?: yes

116: Fly by helicopter?: no

117: What concerts have I been to?

Then: one direction/5sos twice Now: 1d, 5sos, lindsey stirling, twenty one pilots

118: Had a crush on someone of the same sex?

Then: ;) Now: uh yeah

119: Learned another language?

Then: halfway Now: ALMOST HALFWAY WITH SPANISH AGH

120: Wore make up?

Then: i wear it everyday Now: i fucking love makeup

121: Lost my virginity before I was 18?

Then: no Now: lost it AT 18

122: Had oral sex?

Then: no Now: hell fucking yeah

123: Dyed my hair?

Then: no Now: a lot in the past 6 months lmao

124: Voted in a presidential election?: no

125: Rode in an ambulance?: no

126: Had a surgery?: yes

127: Met someone famous?: no

128: Stalked someone on a social network?: yes

129: Peed outside?: yes

130: Been fishing?: yes

131: Helped with charity?: yes

132: Been rejected by a crush?

Then: not yet thank god Now: yup it sucks

133: Broken a mirror?

Then: no Now: i didn’t but my roommates bf broke mine lmao

134: What do I want for birthday?

Then: many things Now: my boy :(

135: How many kids do I want and what will be their names?

Then: one kid, a girl, named aristotle Now: a girl and a boy and idk names

136: Was I named after anyone?: no

137: Do I like my handwriting?: sometimes

138: What was my favourite toy as a child?: my skip it

139: Favourite Tv Show?

Then: house of anubis Now: stranger things

140: Where do I want to live when older?

Then: in a city Now: anywhere that’s not the USA

141: Play any musical instrument?

Then: viola and piano Now: viola, violin, piano, ukelele

142: One of my scars, how did I get it?

Then: falling on the conastoga trail while attempting to exercisse Now: burnt my arm cooking

143: Favourite pizza toping?: extra cheese

144: Am I afraid of the dark?: yes

145: Am I afraid of heights?: no

146: Have I ever got caught sneaking out or doing anything bad?

Then: no Now: not yet

147: Have I ever tried my hardest and then gotten disappointed in the end?: yes

148: What I’m really bad at

Then: giving advice Now: focusing

149: What my greatest achievements are

Then: ??? Then: landing my past three jobs, being a part of a sorority, maintaining a 2.5 gpa

150: The meanest thing somebody has ever said to me

Then: that I’m annoying and a bitch Now: that i ruined their life

151: What I’d do if I won in a lottery

Then: buy EVERYTHING Now: pay off my loans then go travel the world

152: What do I like about myself: my eyes

154: Something I fantasise about

Then: a lot of thing Now: being with Ivan forever

#holy SHIT THAT TOOK FOREVER #WOW #my post #about me

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