#at this point i'm just like every time i want to complain or i feel bad at all i'm just gonna write hcs and fics
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steve finding out reader is expecting twins and being utterly panicked, like he needs to go see robin and eddie to talk him down because he is freaking out
Ahhhhhh I love this!!! (you know the TikTok sound 'oh my goodness I love this questiionnnnn, I think-' yeah thats me right now).
857 words cw: swearing, loser!Steve trying to get his groove back,
An ice pack was pressed to his head, Robin's chipped nail polish covered fingers holding it in place. She was mumbling something, freaking out as she stumbled over her panic, 'maybe we should call 911'.
Eddie was laughing, cold beer in one hand as he took in the sight before him. Robin taking deep breaths to calm herself down, interchangeably pressing the ice to herself and Steve, while he groaned every time it was taken away from him. A dark bruise was forming on his forehead from where he passed out in your living room.
"Isn't this the shit you've always been talking about?" Eddie asked, taking a swig of his drink.
Steve closed his eyes, a deep breath leaving him. Robin yelped, shaking his shoulder.
"Stay awake, Steve!" She hurried, squatting in front of him. Steve peeked open an eye, rolling it at her.
"I'm fine, Robin," he said, wincing at the pressure he was feeling. "Yes and no, yes because I love her and I want a soccer team-"
"Damn army at that."
"Eddie. Please," He continued, taking the pack from Robin's fingers. "I'm just going to be fucking terrible at it."
"Steve, those damn kids love you," she supplied, taking his wrist in her hand, presumably to check his vitals. "You run your own babysitting service practically, and you're amazing at it, hey, you might get your ass kicked every now and then, but they're all alive."
"Not helping," he winced, snatching his wrist from her. Eddie leaned forward in his chair, handing a lit cigarette towards the younger man. Steve would normally complain about him smoking indoors, but for right now, it was everything he needed.
"She's right, Steve," he said, watching as Steve took a long drag, shoulders relaxing at the hit. "Those kids will swear up and down that you're the best god damn thing to happen to them, whether you like it or not. You're made for this."
Steve shook his head, coughing as the hit went down the wrong pipe. "No, no, no. Man, I couldn't even get into college, and here I am, working at a movie store, with twins! Twins! Two babies! On their way!"
Eddie laughed at his urgency, reclining as he looked up at the ceiling of the Harrington home. He took a look around, humming as he found it spacious.
"I think a crib will fit perfectly right there," he pointed towards a corner, closing one eye as he envisioned it. Steve whined, sinking into the couch even further.
"My dad's going to kill me," he muttered, putting the palms of his hands over his eyes. He was never a religious man, but in this moment, he felt God in his presence. "Fuck, what if I'm like my dad? I'm going to be so shit at this, she's gonna leave me. Oh my God, I'm going to be a single dad."
"Steve!" Robin grabbed his shoulders, shaking them as he lolled his head to look at her. "Snap out of it, okay?"
Steve nodded, his bottom lip jutting out as he moped. His eyes were wide, watering slightly as he envisioned the next few months, no years, decades of his life changing.
"You're going to be the best god damn dad out there, alright? You may be a Harrington, but you're not gonna be like him," Robin held eye contact, sincere as she pressed a hand to his chest. "She loves you. You love her. The two of you are like a match made in heaven."
Eddie hummed in agreement, turning so his feet hung off the side of the lounge chair. "Or hell, if you want to look at it like that."
Robin cut him a look, gaze firm.
"Okay fine, you're made for each other, alright? There couldn't be a better duo than the two of you, and you'd need to be completely senseless to not see that," he reached out, fingers spread as he expected the cigarette back. "Trust me when I say, I think you're going to be perfect at this. You may think it's the wrong timing, but I mean, it happened for a reason."
Steve nodded, looking in between the two of them. He began to feel hopeful, figuring his two friends wouldn't lead him astray when it came to this.
"What if I am bad at it though? Even if I try?" His voice was small, fear etched into it. Robin placed a hand on his knee, squeezing lightly.
"No one's good at it, especially for the first time. What matters is trying and just being there," she said, patting at him. "Now get the hell up. Give her a call, apologize for being terrible and leaving her at her house, and make it work, Harrington."
Steve looked towards Eddie, who smiled and nodded as he agreed. Slowly standing up, he felt less shaky in his movements, redeveloping the muscle he felt he had lost earlier.
Eddie gave a toothy grin as Steve crossed the room, giddy in his steps as he made his way towards the house phone. "Just wrap it up next time, Harrington."
"Eddie!"
Masterlist! Inbox and requests are open! <3
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Hi I freaking love your writing! It is HOT!!!! I love you, love your work, thank you for alll you have done
Anyway, I have a nsfw prompt that kind of loaded, tran!reader is fcking Adam with a strap-on and Adam, out of it with horni, got fed up with the pace , flip reader over and start reading him with a brutal pace
Bonus point if you work in dialogue like "you are going to break me <3" "try not to before I'm done" , just Adam being bit of a mean bottom
Adam being a mean bottom is what I live for. Babe's a bratty power bottom through and through and no one can or will take that from me
Take me down, a little bit harder now
pairing: Adam x trans!male!reader
warnings: language, anal sex
note: not beta read bc fuck you I don't have beta readers
Your hips slapping against his ass, his breathless moans and your heavy breathing were the only sounds that filled your bedroom. Adam underneath you was visible enjoying himself, on all fours he kept rocking himself back and forth on the strap on you had bought ages ago - it turned out that the self claimed dickmaster not only liked getting his dick wet, he also loved taking dick.
You gave it your all, snapped your hips forwards as harshly as you could while you also tried to keep the pace up, given that this was not your first round of the day you were quite tired already - not that this little fact would make you less horny though. “C’mon bitch, gimme fucking more,” Adam tried to provoke you in the most obvious way possible and while normally you’d put him in his place, your body was too tired to manhandle him and fuck him even harder. “Shut the fuck up, I’m trying,” you responded, sounding a little too focused for the fact that you just kept punding into him. Adam wriggled his ass as he kept moving his hips back and forth to meet your thrusts halfway through, he felt so overwhelmingly full and yet it was not enough to push him over the edge, not when he knew what you were capable of doing to him. So he made a decision.
He moved his hips forwards as you pulled back, causing the strap on to leave his body and while the emptiness drove him even more insane than the feeling of your thrusts leading up to nothing at all did, he was willing to pay that price for a short time. He turned around, the look in his eyes told you that he was done fucking aŕound, the first man was to finally orgasm, he wanted to reach his climax. “What the-” you were interrupted by Adam’s lips. The brunette had basically thrown himself onto you, pinned you down against the mattress as his hungry lips claimed yours. Your body was just as surprised over the sudden change of position as your mind was, having Adam on top of you was always nice and would never be something you would turn down. The first man bit down onto your bottom lip just as his hips sank down the rubber dick, that way he kept more needy moans from escaping his lips. “If you want shit to be done fucking right then you have to do ‘em your fucking self,” the brunette somewhat complained as he lifted his hips yet again just to press his ass flush against your hips again a moment later.
His large hands pressed down onto your chest to keep you pinned to the mattress, his ass slapped against your hips twice as fast as you had been fucking the first man, desperation hung heavy in his voice as he whined right into your ear, his lips attached themselves onto your jaw, sucking and biting the sensitive flesh. “You're going to break me,” you commented on Adam’s almost animalic behavior, he was acting like he was in heat, like the strap on was the only thing that kept him grounded and dulled the physical pain he’d go through otherwise. Not that you minded - not at all, you liked it actually. “Try the fuck not to before I'm fucking done with you,” he growled back at you.
Your hands were roaming over the brunette’s back, squeezing his ass every now and then and ghosting over his hips. “For the sake of my fucking dick, you better start jerking me the fuck off,” the first man huffed between moans and groans as your hands held onto his hips. That on the other hand he did not have to tell you twice, one of your hands was wrapped around his erection in no time, causing the taller - quite vocal - man to cry out your name in pleasure. He quickened the pace once more, eager to meet your hand and the thrust of your hips, he needed every little bit of stimulation he could get and he’d gladly chase the feeling if needed. He was too horny to be embarrassed about how needy he was acting, his brain too fogged up by lust and clouded with desire as he chased the needs his body screamed at him to fulfill.
Your thrusts grew sloppy and so did his hip movement, his arms started to shake against your skin, he had trouble keeping his head up so he simply buried it in your neck - that was also a good way to muffle the sounds that kept spilling from his lips - as he continued to work for his climax. You loved how vocal Adam got when he was close, or when he was needy in general, because the sounds this man was able to make were divine through and through. And despite you two doing the dirty and staining your pureness, he made your name sound so holy and untouchable when he moaned it out loud, for everyone to hear.
With a cry that sounded like a mix between ‘Fuck’ and your name the first man spilled his load, covering not only your but also his stomach in the hot, white fluid. And despite him reaching his breaking point, he kept thrusting his hips up to meet your touch, the touch that made him feel so good, so desired, and down to meet the rubber dick that made him crave more, that made him shudder and bend over every single time. However, it didn’t take long for the exhausted brunette to collapse on top of you. He mumbled sweet, blissed out nothings against the bruising skin of your neck that he had marked up all prettily and you simply petted your hair. Golden wings wrapped around you as Adam rolled over, taking you with him in his arms. You could tell the first man was about to fall asleep and even though you knew the feeling when you’d wake up later would be absolutely nasty, you allowed yourself to fall asleep as well.
#hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel adam#adam x male reader#male reader#adam x y/n#adam x reader#adam x you#trans reader
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im actually going to tear into totk’s dragon’s tears/ memories rn bc i remember feeling distinctly unsatisfied with them when i got all of them so im just going to write some general bullet points about them, about what i dislike or maybe what i do actually like about them, leaving out both master sword scenes and the mummydorf one because i’m here to talk about the stuff in the past not that
- off the bat (i play this game in english btw so all of this is based on the english text and translation i am aware some stuff is slightly different in other languages) im not really a fan of how the descriptions of all of the tears is just a literal description of what happens?? i think my issue with it is that some of the text is a little bit too in depth, as in it just tells you literally everything about the scene. this might be nitpick-y but i personally dont like it
- what’s up with zelda saying ‘but that must mean...!’ at the end of the scene. is it suggesting that she’s made the realization that rauru and sonia are the first king and queen of hyrule? because they literally tell her that like ten seconds before. i guess it’s suggesting she’s realizing she’s in the past but... idk the texts says ‘she’s left startled by a suspicion that she’s heard those names before’ yeah theyre the first king and queen of hyrule?? they tell her that. they tell her their names and that they are the first leaders of hyrule is she just now connecting the dots that she’s in the past? that’s what the next cutscene implies. but all of the surrounding dialogue and the description don’t suggest that that’s what she’s realizing i feel like this was kind of muddled in the translation
- why did sonia elbow rauru he was just standing weird he didnt say anything this isnt a nitpick im just confused. is it because he’s not being very empathetic towards what zelda’s going through? she elbows him and then she goes and talks to zelda why even elbow rauru. ordinarily you elbow someone like that if you mean for them to go do something why elbow someone if you’re going to do the thing you want anyways
- why doesnt zelda offer to help with the purah pad or anything like that. what happened to her sheikah tech fascination from botw. not even as someone actually familiar with the technology who could give mineru some points as to how it works
- what are sonia and zelda doing behind rauru when he shoots that insane fucking beam at the mulduga swarm they’re clearly doing something with their stones but like... are they amplifying rauru’s power somehow?? what do time powers have to do with the beam of light i dont- what were they doing please the text description only mentions him using his powers so are sonia and zelda just... supporting his powers? idk man
- dragon tear #5 is a whole can of worms with its worse-than-oot reenactment of that one scene from oot. why the focus on sonia and her tear btw. i mean yeah she dies to motivate rauru and zelda but like. why not aim for the new girl who probably doesn’t know how to use it as much and is probably more likely to be separate from the king who can shot insane lasers. im really not a fan of this scene for how strongly the game sides with rauru and zelda being passive and judgemental but ganondorf is literally the best part of it there’s a lot of character in just how he picks up his sword and stands up to leave
- putting memories 6 and 7 together just because of how there was just. no fucking care put into the idea of zelda learning to use her time powers. memory 6 zelda talks about wanting to use her time powers and sonia gives her tips on how she could use it and visualize the use of it and then in memory 7 she can just use it perfectly with great control and timing. why even bother talking about her nothing yet understanding how to use it when the very next scene she just uses it like it’s nothing. how much time has passed we get nothing to show us zelda trying to practice this power just. nope. she’s good she can use it perfectly. also more awkward dialogue sonia saying ‘what a picture zelda paints of him’ as she is. looking directly at zelda. change the line to like, ‘what a picture you paint of him’ she is literally looking right at zelda so why would she say it like that
- generally i feel like memory six should have been before 4 and 5 (4 being where she uses some power to... support??? rauru and it being before memory 5 so that there isnt this weird break in between the memories concerning ganondorf.) memory 6 does not have anything to do with memory 4 or 5 so just put it earlier so there isnt a weird shift in focus between the two big ganondorf scenes
- good god they introduce the idea of sonia and zelda being aware of ganondorf using a fake zelda but theres literally nothing about it having been a problem or them having experience or like. anything. they just TELL you that they know and suggest that it’s been like. a thing for a bit??? also obligatory ganondorf’s face model rigging is fucked comment he’s still the best part
- the pacing of these memories is just weird in general, memories 7 and 8 being separate but the same scene is strange when other memories are long as fuck but cover one event each, plus theres clearly barely any passage of time between memories 7 and 8 it almost feels like they were split up to fill space or just because otherwise it’d be... too long? man idk
- ‘queen sonia needs you!’ girl she is DEAD good fucking luck doing anything to help her
- ganondorf’s horse and its armor both look sick as fuck i really wish you got to see more of it outside the memory it appears in
- everything about the original sages honestly sucks. they aren’t characters they’re just walking macguffins. they have no names and are not relevant or mentioned or make any appearance until they are needed by the story. why does the zora sage talk about getting word about the attacked gerudo village in this scene when like. they’ve all met up and have clearly. been together for a bit. when she gives them the news it’s clearly the first they’ve heard of it... but... why would she wait until this moments to give this info unless for the benefit of the player watching the scene. why does the ZORA sage have this news and not... the gerudo sage?? what’s with the masks. they’re all made of zonaite or whatever sure theyre gifts from rauru but like. i hate that it kind of denotes them being subservient and lower than him and the zonai. honestly i really hate this scene in general mostly because of the uncomfortable showing of how rauru absolutely holds power over them and despite them being leaders as well they are expected to be wholly blindly loyal to him. rauru only gives them these stones when he needs their aid and they swear loyalty too him soon after but you also see that sonia and mineru have stones, too, so they’re clearly withholding these things despite it being kind of reasonable for him to give each race their own secret stone as further proof of their pact? there is so much shit to be said about the imperialistic themes or whatever in this fucking story and i really hate it
- i do kinda like how the next scene shows you that the one rock in the corner of that first hidden room in the forgotten temple is sonia’s grave
- zelda’s phrasing and description of how she and link found ganondorf is weird to me ‘he’s still alive’ ‘he lives on’ girl that was a mummy. he was not moving until you got there. he’s undead at best as far as you know. this is def a nitpick but eh. also the reliance on link is a... bit odd when zelda does not actually know that link is safe until she gets the master sword. its fine but still. also her shell-shocked expression after rauru talks about her being in the past for a reason is a bit... it doesn’t fit her emotion it’s kind of similar to the expression she had when sonia was killed
- the memory about the imprisoning war starts with practically the whole story up until now being repeated back to you by mineru with a decent amount of bias on mineru’s part and while it’s fine because of some of the extra stuff you learn but it does a lot more telling rather than showing when it comes to the actual imprisoning war and... idk the whole thing about their ‘fight’ kind of falls flat when you don’t actually see any fighting you just see that the sages have gotten their asses beat. i think it would have been a little interesting if in the god-awful repetitive sage-awakening scenes they had actually showed you the og sages fighting ganondorf instead of just. slow-mo freeze-frames for whatever. once again ganondorf if the best part of the scene
- the rest of the memories are fine idc
i get the feeling that the japanese-to-english translation was either all-around rough or somehow rushed, because some of the phrases in the game as well as some of the dialogue is really awkward and... could have been better. i don’t know how it works but it feels like a lot of it was very literal, direct translation and no one at noa thought that it ought to be tweaked just a little bit
these memories also do a fuck-ton of telling rather than showing and it really is like they don’t really trust you to connect the dots, and some of it does come off like they either didn’t want to make more memories or ran out of time or something. i felt like the memory of ganondorf just summoning his monsters and riding on his cool horse could have been a bit longer to actually show us the forces of hyrule fighting him and having a hard time with it
a lot of the character animations doesn’t have a whole lot of personality to them, ganondorf is the character who had the most distinct and interesting movements. rauru and sonia had their... singular movement (rauru putting a hand to his chin and sonia taking zelda’s hands) and zelda was kind of just... standing around and reacting to stuff, and neither mineru nor any of the other sages had any really interesting animations asides from mineru’s coughing fit in memory 16 (plus her reclining chair that was a nice touch). very few of their movements really express anything about the characters besides some really baseline values or traits.
the ordering of some memories is kind of odd, the excessive flashbacks in memory 17 are a bit much, the telling rather than showing, the sometimes awkward dialogue, a lot of the scenes are characters just... talking at each other, you don’t actually see very much of hyrule in the past or any characters beyond the main four, and it really did nothing to actually get me to care about these characters at all.
tldr i dont like totk’s dragon tears
#i didnt want to revisit this game but the memories in totk bother me. once im done with this tho i can go read my new volumes of berserk#salty talks#loz#legend of zelda#totk#literally the narrative of this game dragged the rest of the game through mud for me so im going to complain abt it more#any time i wanted to rewatch a part of a scene i have to sit through a few minutes of bullshit just to get to the point.#these things are so long and barely anything happens in them#half of these cutscenes are just characters standing around and talking theres so little actual character to most of the character movements#ganondorf has the most emotive and distinct movements in all of these scenes#they have the most personality and you get the most variety. with rauru and sonia its just. shes gentle n motherly hes uhhhh arrogant king#honest to god. i miss linebeck. i miss the way he was animated and the sheer amount of personality they gave him in every cutscene#fuck man i miss botw's memories. despite them being shorter (i'm pretty sure) i feel like there was more essence to them. more character#listen. i understand that gamedev is hard and so is writing and animating but like. this game is seventy fucking dollars.#despite him being so disappointingly one-note. ganondorf was the most interesting fucking character in these memories#finding the dragon's tears was fun but actually watching them was lame af#hey remember those posts i made about ph's cutscenes? maybe its the autism but i feel like i couldnt write those paragraphs abt totk#ig just. ph is my special interest and i have a negative bias against totk. if you think im dead wrong about this stuff go ahead.#i dont blame anyone for taking my words with a grain of salt. come to your own conclusions. if oyu like totk's memories cool!#anyways im done bye im gonna read berserk. which actually has a nuanced story and world and characters and a multi-faceted villain#totk spoilers#bitching abt totk
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All my life I've been told by all kinds of people that they can never really tell what I'm feeling or what's going through my mind because apparently I'm always just hiding everything behind a smile so that I've become rather unreadable. And then he just. Takes one look at me and goes 'Yeah. I know that face, oh here we go again, she's about to unleash her thoughts. She's gonna bash that theory I just showed her so hard. Where's my popcorn?' I hadn't even said anything yet and he was already laughing.
And to be honest. It's quite nice to be known, actually.
#i only went to his office to ask if he wants to join me for lunch he didn't have time and yet i still somehow ended up staying for 1.5 hours#'thanks for the conversation' he said when i left. 'and thanks for keeping me from my work'#as if HE hadn't kept me from lunch when he kept our conversation going on and on with his 'wait i still wanted to show you this'#talking to him always feels like wellness for my brain somehow. like. we're different people but we think the same way.#i don't have to translate my thoughts to be understood he already gets my point before i've even finished my train of thought#every time work tires me out so much that it feels like i can't think straight anymore then i talk to him and suddenly my brain works again#and i like how he calls me out on my nonsense when i lose myself in a contradiction or don't say what i want to say or say what i don't mea#and he lets me go on extensive rants about statistics despite not knowing anything about it and doesn't even complain#he just always says 'i'll pretend i know what that means' and says i should learn it well so he can ask me for my help with it later#recently he came to me right after teaching saying 'you won't believe how much i just messed up. let me show you how i failed'#and then proceeded to recreate the entire situation and his thought process at that moment and i just#there is a very big word running around in my mind that i dare not speak of but maybe one day#i don't even know if he even sees me as much as a friend maybe i'm just some co-worker he likes talking to occasionally you know#what does it mean what does it all mean#ramblings
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bg3 is crazy for being a massive $70 larian + wotc collab game whose accessibility menu features subtitles that are present for less than half of all idle character dialogue and almost zero battle dialogue
#succ speaks#not to be the 'paizo wouldn't let this happen' guy but god this is actually insane#like why even have an accessibility menu at that point? i'd rather watch a youtube video with automatic captions#same energy as devs complaining that everyone was making their pcs a white human guy in early access while they had no asian human options#like bro i just want to know what bestie karlach is saying but if u make her mumble with no captions even tho i have subtitles on#tf am i supposed to do.....🤨😡😭💀#baldur's gate 3 is fun but this is pissing me off. like i'm prob not gonna keep playing this solo & only play online with friends#it's fun but. not fun enough to mimic the actual wacky bullshit i do with charisma rogues and bards in dnd or pf#i think i'm also used to having real humans around for ttrpg antics and dynamic character interactions so bg3 feels bland in comparison lol#also because irl i can ask people to repeat what they just said 🙃🙃🙃#joining the mob by accident was admittedly funnier in bg3 than it was in dnd though considering i stumbled into the base out of nowhere#i guess it just falls under ny philosophy that dnd is most fun when wotc has zero actual say in what happens and what we can do 👍#however as much as pf > dnd...bg3 > kingmaker. i think pathfinder is just to true of a ttrpg to adapt into a video game super well#like. the writing in wotr was WAY better than bg3 but still sometimes bad enough to be infuriating ESPECIALLY in regards to iomedae#but the weird ass iomedae stuff is also true in the adventure path itself and plenty of other people have complained about it#but hey at least in wotr the subtitles told me what she was saying every time she spoke 👍#wotr was still rly fun tho no hate to the game in general this is a quick slam of being pissed at bg3 again 🙏🙏
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Most people really don't seem to understand that friendship is a two-way street.
They expect you to wait on them hand and foot as they rant about and constantly pour on you either their issues or their passions and when you finally have something you'd like to talk about you get a "Man that sucks :/" or a "Cool" in return.
Find somebody who doesn't do that. Then you'll have your best friend.
#i know i ramble sometimes and i'm extremely grateful that my best friend puts up with it :')#but see then in return i do the same for her because it would be completely unfair for me to expect her to act like a wall for me to talk a#or when i wanna show her something and i can tell she's being polite and it doesn't personally strike her fancy I MOVE ON#and she does the same for me and we have way frickin better communication and we have a frickin rad friendship#it's give and take#and also can we bring back the idea of being able to work through some things on your own?#like i am ALL FOR having a support system that can encourage you when things go wrong but some things can be solved on your own#i shouldn't be bearing the burden of figuring out your life for you you know?#i'm absolutely willing to help but if you're just going to spend all your time complaining to me and never ever take my advice#then there comes a point at which i'm literally just acting as your therapist and that's not how friendships are supposed to work#i've become kind of the designated therapist in a lot of friendships throughout my life#and it is exhausting constantly being complained at (sometimes over very minor things)#only to have that person or people COMPLETELY ignore your advice every single time you try to give it#that's not friendship my dude that's using me because you just want someone to complain to#like i said. support system good. treating your friend like an emotional punching bag to let out your problems 24/7 very very bad.#like when i was feeling completely unlike myself and irritated and frustrated for three dang years straight#i didn't really talk about it much because i knew it wasn't the kind of thing advice was going to fix#so i wasn't in the discord servers every two seconds “MAN I REALLY JUST DON'T FEEL GOOD :///”#because when other people do this to me there comes a point at which i'm like “WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO ABOUT IT”#like i've given you all the advice i have and you have taken absolutely none of it nor have you taken any action on your own#so now i'm just here to make you feel better about yourself and that's really not my job#emotional support is necessary. patting you on the head when you refuse to do anything to better your situation is not.#tl;dr people who refuse to do anything to better their situation other than complain to ME about it 24/7 drive me nuts#and it drives other people nuts so please don't do it to anyone#don't bottle up your emotions but also don't let them come crashing down and drown everyone you know#just because you can't be bothered to put ANY effort forth to contain them#emotional regulation is attractive~~~#society today has built such a culture of “it's not YOUR fault and if you cry about it hard enough someone will fix it for you” like no sir#sometimes it IS your fault and sometimes you DO need to take responsibility#and if it is your fault then absolutely no one but you is obligated to fix it
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the RAMPANT consumerism on the section of youtube I have ended up on recently is actually kind of disgusting to me. if I see one more video of a perfectly manicured hand with a hint of a sweater sleeve putting things in a target cart or using 100 bottles for a skin and hair self-care day or using 50 different cleaning products in an enormous, pristine, white home while a random pop song remix plays in the background I'm going to start destroying things.
#I know exactly how I got here#there is a specific crossover of decluttering/production hacks/workout plans/minimalism/motivational videos that leads directly#to very wealthy stay-at-home women doing sunday resets and target hauls and restocking and organizing the guest bedroom#and 4 hour pre-vacation self-care videos#but it is so BAD. I am not saying don't buy things or take care of yourself or anything like that#I literally have mentioned several times in the past two weeks that I was waiting on packages in the mail!#but GOD. the difference between buying a set of dvds I'm going to use until they fall apart#and literally having 4 bookcases of skin care products is ASTRONOMICAL#I cannot imagine a single reason anyone would ever need that much stuff#and it's All so sanitized and perfected and nothing can be out of place and it's just awful#that girl aesthetic/it girl/clean girl aesthetic/etc etc#and every single woman in these videos is perfectly shaped and tanned and hair done up#and they all wear these matching set workout fits#just oh my god girl!!!!!! what are you doing????!!!!!??#I don't know. I don't know that there's a point to this besides me complaining and being upset#but it's just so antithetical to the way I want to live and I know it's so bad for the environment#and I know it is encouraging so many people to look and act just like that#and I hate it!!!! it feels like we are never getting out sometimes for real#maybe I'm being mean. maybe they are actually very conscientious of the environment#and maybe they are only showing a once a month shopping trip#and maybe they have just been sent a ton of PR packages that they have to figure out how to store#but. it really doesn't feel or look that way
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holy shit never before have i wanted an easy restock food button as much as i do right now, because this constant back and forth and clicking and shit is absolute murder to my wrists right now
#gremlin blabs#sorry for complaining about my stupid weak baby wrists on main#... on side? meh whatever#i just fucked them up again after a while of them doing well#and they've been awful for the past week#and i'm trying to refill my food stocks right now#and just. fucking hell it hurts like hell lol#i've already wanted this to be a thing for a while because refilling food is so extremely exhausting to me#i feel like fucking sisyphus every time i have to do it#but now it's also hurting me so yay#it wouldn't be as bad if i had higher amounts of high point food items but i do not so </3
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thinkin back to the rggo story where mine saves daigo after he gets kidnapped because daigo thought kiryu was in danger and mine immediately scolds him for acting recklessly and daigo’s just ‘no one’s ever stood up to me before aside from kashiwagi’ and how that calls back to daigo’s Y0 substory where kiryu tells him only true friends will stand up to him and put him in his place and im--
#snap chats#'i'm going to be normal' WELL I WAS LYING. LIKE A LIAR. WHO LIES.#ill go in my kitchen in a sec im just. I'm Just.#*gross sobbing*#rgg really made up for Y3's Everything by giving the rggo stories and im so serious about this#people I Am Also A Part Of People complained about not being able to see mine and daigo together much and see their friendship#and.... the rggo stories..... bro theyve been fueling me for months..... im so ill......#BUT SERIOUSLY THOUGH THATS WHY I GET INSANE OVER DAIGO'S Y0 SUBSTORY TOO#like daigo just wanted- NEEDED real friends who would ACTUALLY be there for him for him#not for his status or money or any of that superficial shit#it genuinely makes me happy how dedicated mine is to daigo like No Shit but it's just. *crying*#i love how mine does tell daigo when he fucks up though i love that so much#like mine's such a funny character... he's so cynical yet when he gets the chance to pour his heart out he does#he meant it when he said he didn't take sharing a cup lightly and /i/ want to eat a cup because of it#THIS IS THE SAME SUBSTORY WHERE MINE BUYS A STOCK IN EVERY TAXI COMPANY LIKE DO YOU SEE WHAT I MEAN#ALL OF THAT JUST TO BE ABLE TO FIND DAIGO#dear god dont get me started on the hamazaki/mine rggo story. oh my god it's THAT but 10 billion i'm going to throw up#i'm just. i HAVE to go into my kitchen or i'll end up typing another essay jesus CHRIST#LIKE AGAIN I FEEL LIKE IM NOT SAYING WHAT I WANT OR GETTING MY POINT ACROSS BUT AAAA#i just need everyone to know i AM still ill over them i just havent had time or many ideas to sit and draw/write something
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social interaction is so weird. I don't understand it.
at my birthday party yesterday, I just sort of sat there. and watched and listened. and occasionally responded to something someone said. my brother and my friend did most of the talking. it's easy for them, they just know what to say and/or they don't care how they seem to others. they just talked to everyone the whole time.
I don't know, it just feels pointless. I want to like it, I really do, but when there's more than maybe 2 or 3 people (maybe 4, depending who it is) I just feel like an animal trapped in a cage. it feels really bad. it's not fun, it's just stressful. even when I like everyone there and everything is completely fine.
and when everyone leaves I'm just so relieved. I always want to talk to people more, I miss the times when I saw my friends more often, but when I do see them I just want to leave. like, I don't know what to do about it. I did all the things my therapist told me when I was in therapy but it changed nothing. it doesn't feel like I have social anxiety (though yeah okay that too - but it's better now with meds), it's like they're speaking a different language that's sort of similar but I can't quite understand it. I really want to and I try to pretend I do but I can't and it sucks.
like, my therapist would always tell me I can do it, there's no reason to be afraid of social situations because I'm really good at them actually. but no, I was good at therapy because it was a short period of time, I knew the rules and what was expected of me, I knew the only other person there, and I just. lied all the time about everything so she wouldn't be angry with me. I was so afraid she'd think I'm just wrong that I still had to pretend I'm normal.
#I complain about this every time#but just. what do you do about it#practice never made it better. actually it made it worse because I was always exhausted from being around people so much#like when I was going to class every day and practicing everything my therapist said. didn't help. just made me even more tired#I don't know#at one point today I got so overwhelmed that I just thought right this isn't working let's just pretend to be eliot. I don't even know what#that means but I just. idk. being me doesn't work it's just not good enough#it's possible that I really am just autistic. I don't want to say that because I don't have a diagnosis but. idk I guess that's how it feels#I feel so out of place. I had to try so hard not to go get one of my dolls and brush their hair to calm myself down#but that'd be weird so I can't do that#so I just sit there and wait until it's over. and maybe occasionally look at some gifs on my phone. look it's okay my fictional people are#still in there I can still pretend I'm with them!#what the fuck is wrong with me?#personal
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I keep thinking about all the people complaining about those who say they're not going to vote for Biden, forgetting that a good number of Arabs and Muslims living in the US voted for this guy believing that he had at least some of their best interest at heart, only to find out not only that he betrayed their trust but is more than willing to throw them and so many people of color under the bus when he and so many other western politians keep lying about the horrific loss Palestinian lives by a genocidal fascist state. Not to mention what's going on in Congo and Sudan.
Lives are being erased because of him, and our votes, and our fucking money that went into killing them instead of taking care of us.
That trust is dead.
But if you're still going to openly complain about whether or not people are going to vote for the ratman in the next election rather than keeping you mouth shut, then I can only say you can go fuck yourself and go die on that hill for all I care.
#Rant#Every time I go online I see a fresh new horror. It's either a dead body or a bigot lying or laughing about it.#I'm at my limit with twitter#but tumblr feels too damn quiet about it in comparison...#the whole point of rebloging here or retweeting there feels disingenuous to the entirety of it all...#I don't want to ever want to feel like my complaints are pointless like every other useless asshole who says there's no point in trying#R0bita Rambles#Rainb0w Rambles#every liberal that complains about brown people's concerns is just a another useless centralist...#palestine#congo#sudan
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If I have migraines, so do my characters, so here’s a list of them and how they’re affected purely for the catharsis:
Liam: He’s basically my migraine conduit at this point. He gets them often, to varying degrees. Sometimes he can work through them, sometimes they make him sensitive, and sometimes they take him out. When that happens, he’s relegated to bed until it goes away or he finally breaks and takes migraine rescue meds. He has less severe migraines so often that he doesn’t always register them as a problem, but as the resident anxiety man, he can’t avoid them.
Will: His are occasional, but they knock him out completely anywhere from a few hours to a day. They make him sick, and he just generally doesn’t have a good time the whole time. He gets migraine hangovers and tries to function through them but the brain fog gets to him pretty badly. He gets forgetful and loses track of time easily.
Enyo: Anxiety man again, but in a different book! He almost constantly has a dull headache, so constantly present that he doesn’t necessarily register it all the time. Consequently, he doesn’t normally do anything to make them better. When he gets migraines, he forgets that they’re migraines and just lies down until the worst of it stops.
Rory: He spends a lot of time at a screen and a lot of time just being...brain on. It’s almost like he uses so much energy that eventually his body is like “rest time now” and puts him in so much pain that he can’t function.
#is it obvious yet that every one of my favorite ocs suffers the most#sorry you have to be subjected to me making myself feel better but#i was projecting migraine feelings onto characters who aren't mine but then figured i should switch to my own#do we uh want me to keep posting random hcs about my ocs as i think of them or should i stick to aesthetic posts and stuff#my hcs aren't all about migraines i promise#i am living in migraine hangover hell right now and my dog's vet appt went badly (he's okay it just sucked)#at this point i'm just like every time i want to complain or i feel bad at all i'm just gonna write hcs and fics#anyway might delete this later if i feel dumb about it but right now i just think my characters should suffer too#oc headcanons#liam#rory#enyo#will#oc thoughts#i forget how i tag stuff thank u migraine hangover brain
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Maybe I just miss havin someone else to blame
#i feel so fucking useless. worthless. i had ONE job n instead i fucked it up n crossed that one line i can't uncross#he'll never forgive me n it's all my own damn fault#don't know how to cope with how there's no way back now. he doesn't even want me anymore he just wants to hurt me#n i kinda wanna let him cause it's all i was ever any good for anyway#just. lie back n let him take it all out on me. as if he ever made it that easy#god what the hell is wrong with me this is fucking pathetic#he was the only one that could make my head quiet the only one i could always go back to. even if he made me regret it every time#i don't know how to change any of this. it can't always be like this can it? somethin's gotta change at some point right?#i need to stop gettin so fucking wasted i make a fool outta myself but. i only feel even sorta okay if i'm drunk#what the fuck am i supposed to do?#i just wanna go home. i thought things would get better now that i'm technically free of him but. i still feel the same. or worse#at least i could keep myself numb most of the time. n i had cherri n nuggs. everyone feels so fucking far away here#n it's probably me not them but. idk how to change anythin. everythin's just wrong.#everythin's always wrong#i'm so fucking tired n sleep doesn't change a fucking thing#i guess maybe val was right. there's nothin out here for someone like me. what he gave me was the best i could get n i shoulda just m#*appreciated it instead of always complaining#idk how long i can keep myself from goin back to him. just to see if he can still make it all go away. even if i'll probably regret it.#fucking hell how long can i keep this up?? i can't start drinkin more i can't damage this body like that for the others#but i'm startin to run really low on options#spdrvent
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promise this is my last time bitching about all of this ignore it but
#really truly and genuinely just don't want to exist right now every time i think this situation cannot get worse it somehow manages to#i just cried at the dmv and the lady just glared at me like i was the scum of the earth like maam i don't even cry around people#i trust i don't *want* to be crying right now i'm *sorry* okay i just don't know what to do i got given the wrong forms and papers and i#tried explaining all of that and she just looked at me like i was an *idiot* and wouldn't help me with *anything* it was so humiliating#i can't drive the temporary car until it has plates because if i get pulled over for that it's a $500 fine and if i get hit with that on top#of everything else i literally don't know what i'll do i'll probably end up losing my license#but if i can't drive the car i can't go to work and i also can't afford to not go to work right now#i literally feel sick all the time i can't sleep the last few times i've tried to eat anything i feel like throwing it up#and i just feel... so hopeless right now everything i'm trying isn't working or i think i'm getting somewhere and i hit another wall#and one of the most upsetting parts is i feel like no one is helping me and no one cares how hard i'm struggling right now#i literally just want to be allowed to be upset over this but when i got visibly upset at home everyone accused me of taking my frustrations#out on them and being self pitying and 'it could always be worse'#like i don't even know at this point but if i hear the words 'could always be worse' one more time i'm going to maul the person who says the#no one wants me to be upset that's too much to deal with i am *never* allowed to be upset i just want to vent about how shitty this is and#scream and cry at the unfairness of it for a little bit but literally *no one* is letting me do that#'it could always be worse so stop complaining' or if i am visibly upset at all all that matters is it's inconveniencing or upsetting to the#other person.... not that i'm struggling or need help or anything like that#i just want it to be OVER i want it to end i'm so sick of this every time i feel like i'm scraping to somewhere managable in life#something like this happens and this is the scariest and most upsetting thing yet#and i'm not even allowed to be frustrated or upset or sad or angry because then someone else is upset and that matters more than me#so it all built up and a cried at the dmv and every one stared at me like i was annoying and stupid and i want to KILL MYSELF#i want to melt into the ground i want to stop existing i don't want a single person to talk to me because i hate everything right now#but i also desperately want to actually say all of this to a person and them not get mad at me for and tell me it IS unfair it DOES suck and#i didn't deserve this shitty thing that happened or all the other shitty things that happened beforehand#i would also appreciate just pretending it wasn't a thing for a few hours and doing something enjoyable to me with a friend or two...#but that also feels far fetched and then i would feel guilty for not trying to fix this 24/7 even though at this point there's literally#nothing else i could do#i'm just.... so tired and so SO upset and i feel like nobody cares that i'm upset and i'm so sick of EVERYTHING#i'm tired of living
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>is only free some weekends and has to travel a lot for it
>carefully plans to see my friends because it's my only occasions
>they get sick and can't come
#second time it's happened#the rare friends I actually CAN see in those times#idk I got used to spending so much time with all my friends in thz last few years#and now being so busy and so far away is weighting so heavy on me#any time I'm not included in something I feel like I'm starting to disappear#it's like I'm fighting every day to exist#to myself and to others#god#why can't I ever feel like I'm real why am i always building myself from the outside#I just wanted to complain a bit and now typing this shit out a fuck ton of other ton is coming out fuck#my sister told me she felt like I have no personality as a kid I just random decided 'i am this' and then was 'this' out of nowhere#and now I feel like everything about me is fake#I hate that it rings so true so many things about myself I just carefully decided based on what would make mz the most unique or whatever#do I genuinely like anything#yeah actually this is the issue isn't it#the only thing I've ever been sure of about myself is who I love and who loves me#so if I'm away#what's left#and I start to doubt being loved. even though it's my only actual safe point#haha#however much I'm loved by anyone will never compare to their romantic partners anyway I'll still be alone most of the time#maybe that's why I can't see myself with anyone. I just can't see myself
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BOOTHILL HEADCANONS
> Reminder that this is not canon/accurate to his personality
+ contains nsfw (Is labeled)
( Art credit: @ Luvmybabygirl0 )
SFW
I'd like to imagine, that this man just does a hair flip every time he's offended at what you said.
Ex.
"My Love, I know you're jealous but it's just a cat.."
Boothill looks at you for five solid seconds, and then hair flips to let you know he's really offended. "Tell the cat to move then, that's my place."
Does not skip leg day, would probably kabedon you using his LEG or if he does work out he'd probably want to use you as weight, like letting you sit on him while he does push-ups.
Loves going on little trips with you using horses, if you don't have your own horse he'd definitely let you ride his horse but you're in front of him.
Bonus points if you're shorter than him cause he'd put his chin on top of your head while his hands go around your waist to grab the rein.
Would flex to everyone about you, like- he's in a fight with someone? "You weak cutie(bitch), my lover hits harder than you."
Would call you petnames like "Sugar", "Honey", "Darling" , "Babe/Baby" , "Sweetheart" , "Love" , "Love bug" , "Sunshine" , "Pretty (boy/girl/thing)"
Listens to Lady Gaga, I'm sure of this, he would so rock it out on the dance floor and get you to dance with him.
Has eaten a bullet in front of you and was incredibly confused at your reaction that was just like 😰, until you tell him that you were surprised he ate a bullet he'd just be like 🤨 but if you did tell him straight away, he'd cackle at you.
Sometimes forgets he was originally a human so he does the craziest things knowing he can get fixed up anyway (he once jumped off a 13 foot building to chase after an enemy)
Loves to cuddle you, he wants to feel your warmth while he sleeps or relaxes.
Lets you braid his hair or comb it if you want to, once he gets used to you combing or braiding his hair he'd just walk up to you at random times with a brush in hand and let you do what you want with his hair.
Really reckless and causes a lot of trouble sometimes but there are days where he's really calm and all he wants to do is spend time with you, like he just acts like a cute little kitten who just woke up when he's calm.
If JoJo existed in their world, he would be a big fan of it.
Would let you name his gun or horse, does not complain at all even if you name it "princess twilight sparkle cookie crumble" he'd just laugh, completely accepting the name.
Even says the name during fights, he'd say "Your time's out, time to die by my princess twilight sparkle cookie crumble." 😭😭
Looks at his reflection in the mirror a lot while practicing poses, even getting you to watch from the bed or couch while showing you a new pose he likes.
Kisses you a lot, even in public he's really affectionate and touchy, cause no way is he letting other people look at you and think you're single.
You're hot and he knows you're hot so he's trying his best to make everyone know you're already taken.
If someone TRIES to flirt with you in front of him, he's already got you by the waist, against the wall, making out while he flips off the one who tried to flirt with you.
Would let you pick his earrings, always excited when you say you bought a new earring for him.
Looks good in an apron, like, really good. Househusband material frfr.
Plays with your hair a lot, twirling it, and even kissing some strands while he looks at you in the eye.
Easy to get flustered but it always leads to him making you more flustered, he takes everything like a challenge but he does love it every time you sass him back or flirt with him.
Causes a lot of trouble for you and with you, if its for you it's going to be super romantic however it'll some people irritated, but if he's causing trouble with you, its more chaotic and a LOT of people will 100% get pissed.
Cannot sleep without you in his arms, he'll walk over to your room (if you guys aren't sharing one), hair all messy from tossing and turning because you weren't in bed with him. He'll just plop into your bed, it doesn't matter if you're even awake or not he just wants to hold you while he sleeps.
NSFW
Definitely takes off his hat and puts it on you BUT only when he's letting you ride, if you're having normal sex he'd probably just keep it on or let you bite on it while he fucks you from behind.
Probably says something weird during sex which I would love to imagine would just be "Yeehaw" because he can't curse.
Probably into roleplay where you're a criminal and he's a cowboy who successfully hunted you down or the opposite, has a bunch of handcuffs just to use it for roleplay.
I feel like he'd just be the type of person to use sex toys, not dildos though cause he wants to be the only dick inside you, something like collars, leashes, handcuffs, whips, ropes,
He'd be into gags, bondage, dirty talk, lactation, blindfold sex, spit, both praise and degrading kink, spanking, anal, lap-dances, fingering (he'd be conflicted about receiving), oral (receiving and giving), sensory deprivation, and gun play!
If he doesn't have a dick, he'll probably have a bunch of straps, he's good at giving oral but would still prefer fucking you with a dick than fingering or eating you out. (Unless he's the one getting fucked)
I feel like he's a switch but more on the dominant side, he's super open to submission as long as his partner can pleasure him real good.
This man walks around technically naked all the time, so he's got to have imagined having public sex here and there, but most likely in bars where everyone's busy and doing their own thing. Like it'd turn him on if you were just on his lap humping his erection while you both are in a bar but everyone else is just too drunk to notice at all.
Super vocal, grunting, moaning, sometimes even whining and whimpering, you got it all, bonus points because he does it all straight into your ear.
Uses his sharp teeth to mark you all over your body and then sucks on it to leave hickeys, would likely be a little menace and leave his marks somewhere visible even if you're wearing clothes so people would know your his
Wants you to pull on his hair while fucking, he wants to be able to know how good he's making you feel and hair pulling would be his goal to make sure you're getting actual pleasure.
When he kisses you or makes out with you, it'd always involve tongue, has a little hand that sneaks over to your waist stopping at your hip or your ass.
Slaps your ass loud, especially in public, he just smacks it while you're in mid-conversation and the sound just ECHOES, it doesn't hurt it just sounds like it does, he just stands there smirking while you stare at him.
He's an ass guy, boobs are nice to him cause he can suck on the nipples but definitely an ass guy, you cannot tell me he doesn't fuck you from behind solely to see your ass jiggle with every thrust he does.
Flat? Nuh uh, he's making that shit bounce no matter what.
Likes playing with you using his gun, frequently flicks the handle of his gun over your nipples or dick/pussy, sometimes he shoves a little bit of his gun in and if you get your cum on the muzzle, he'd lick it right in front of you.
Likes praising you and getting degraded, is into getting whipped too, he secretly wants to be on his knees begging for you, worshipping you, while you're standing over him with a whip in your hands. (The whip doesn't actually do any damage)
Does not care what gender you are, sometimes he'd misgender you on purpose and call your ass a pussy or if you're a girl, he'd probably call you "pretty boy" just to get you riled up.
His favorite positions when bottoming would be cowgirl, and his favorite position if he's on top would be Doggystyle.
(Edit: I just realized how much of a power bottom he is, but it's up to you, the reader whether you want to fuck him or be fucked by him 😇)
Please do remember everything is just a headcanon and is not actually linked or accurate to what Boothill's like in canon.
( Art credit
1st: Kradebii on Danbooru
2nd: Tei (@2hwe1) on twt
3rd: 2월14일 (Valentine_DD_) on twt )
Please tell me if I got the artists wrong!
#boothill x reader#boothill#headcanon#smut#boothill hsr#boothill hsr x reader#hsr x reader#hsr#xreader#reader#female reader#male reader#gender neutral reader#imagine#honkai star rail#boothill headcanon
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