Ngl I think a lot of people, when they talk about Jedi and attachments and how "the Jedi should be allowed to have them," just plain ignore the single most important show of attachment in all of Star Wars.

Padme and Anakin.

Obviously people bring them up 24/7 when they want to bash the Jedi or pretend that Anidala is the epitome of a "healthy relationship" (lmao), but when it comes to the actual point of how their relationship is framed and how it highlights how attachment works/what it does---suddenly all the discussion around Anakin and Padme disappears!

Anakin's attachment to Padme and his unwillingness to let her go is LITERALLY what ends up killing her!!!

He has dreams of her dying, becomes convinced that those dreams are what's gonna happen (despite the unreliable nature of visions), and---instead of actually telling anyone anything in enough detail so they could actually help---he:

- Starts working with a Sith Lord

- Massacres a Temple full of children, the elderly, the injured, etc. and the people who were caring for them

- Helps commit a genocide

- Overthrows democracy

And then, once Padme won't support him vying for them to control the galaxy, he becomes convinced that she's betrayed him and attempts to kill her---then, later on, because of Anakin's actions Padme dies.

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THAT is what attachment is and what it does.

Attachment is being unable, unwilling, to let someone go, no matter what that might mean for you or them, because you don't want to go through life without them---and the people you try to hold onto so tight ultimately get crushed in your grip because of it.

Think of it like holding someone's hand.

Non-attachment would be, when the other person wants to stop, letting them slip away and being happy with what you had while you had it---being content whether they choose to stay by your side or run off to go do something else.

Attachment would be, when the other person tries to let go, tightening your grip or grabbing their wrist---hurting them because you don't want there to even be a chance that you would be without them.

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So no, the Jedi were not wrong to teach non-attachment and they should not have "changed their philosophies so they were allowed to have attachments" like some people have suggested, because attachment is unhealthy and selfish and all it does is end up hurting those around you.

I'm always a little weirded out by just how much both the movies and the fandom gloss over how utterly uncomfortable Padme was with being around Anakin in the beginning of AotC. Like, this is a woman who grew up under a microscope from the time she was 14, but she still goes so far as to cover all the cameras in her room, knowing that a bounty hunter is after her and just murdered one of her handmaidens, because Anakin watching her creeps her out so much.

And yeah, most of that is because the movies forget about it too in favor of reducing her character to "girl in forbidden love", but still. It's so deeply clear in the first half of the movie just how much Anakin makes Padme uncomfortable. Like. to wild degrees.

I find it very interesting to look at how different it feels when Padme and Luke both say "There's still good in him" just based on the context and lead-up to that line for both characters and why audiences might view the characters differently because of it despite the intentional parallel.

Let's start with Padme. Yes, Padme's dying words are intended to parallel her son's line from Return of the Jedi and we know that she ultimately ends up "right" about there still being good in Anakin. But the context of Padme saying this gives a very different tone to that scene.

Because Padme is a character who actively tries to pretend that Anakin has no darkness in him at all despite repeated evidence being shown and told to her that he DOES simply because it's more convenient for her to do so.

In Attack of the Clones, Anakin straight up tells her he believes in dictatorship and Padme's response isn't to be disgusted or report him, but to just decide that he must have been making fun of her because it's a lot easier than dealing with the reality that the guy who is supposed to be taking care of her is in fact a fascist. And then just a few days after that, Anakin screams in Padme's face that he just massacred an entire village of people down to the last child because he sees them as animals and her response is to decide that this is just a totally normal response to trauma rather than, again, being disgusted by it and reporting him. And of course that movie ends with her deciding to marry him, despite knowing he's a murderer and a fascist and that this is against the rules for BOTH of them.

In Revenge of the Sith, there's an entire scene where Padme and Anakin sit there joking at each other about how love blinds you. They're joking around and you can see the scene as just a sweet little nonsense scene if you choose to, but it's also very intentionally foreshadowing a lot and has the subtext of the thing that is going to destroy both of them in a few days. When Obi-Wan comes to Padme to ask her about where Anakin is and tells her about what Anakin's done, Padme's response is to deny it. She argues that Anakin would never kill children, despite the fact that she knows he HAS killed children before. And then she lies to Obi-Wan, obstructing his ability to figure out the truth about what happened to his people or to gain justice for the genocide that was just committed against them. And her next response is to go find Anakin so that she can ensure he escapes any consequences for what he's done while still insisting that he hasn't done anything wrong at all.

So when Padme says "There's still good in him" it comes with the context of Padme spending two entire films refusing to actually see Anakin for who he actually is. It comes after MULTIPLE scenes of Padme rejecting the reality that Anakin has darkness in him that he is fully capable of acting on. Sure, she's not wrong that there's still good in him, but the line feels more like Padme just continuing to pretend that Anakin didn't just commit a genocide and bring down the Republic rather than Padme being right about Anakin. It doesn't sound like "Yes, I know that he's done a million terrible things, but I have hope that he can still make the right choice if we approach him the right way" and more like "He was probably just brainwashed or something, he didn't REALLY mean to genocide an entire people."

And this then directly foils Luke later on.

Because when LUKE says it, it comes with the context of the entire character journey Luke has been going through over the last 2.5 films. Luke's had to learn to accept his OWN darkness and face his own worst fears about his heritage and what he could become. He's had to face the reality of losing the people he cares about and seen the consequences of what happens when he lets arrogance and fear blind him. Luke has had to accept that Darth Vader is a part of who he is, he's not infallible, he could fall to darkness just like his father did if he isn't careful. But this comes with the ability to recognize that this could mean that Darth Vader might yet be able to turn around and make the opposite choice. If Luke has the ability to fall, Darth Vader has the ability to rise. Luke knows that it's always about making the right choice, and while Darth Vader has made a LOT of bad choices, it doesn't mean he can never make the right one. Choosing to believe that Darth Vader could still have goodness in him is a result of accepting that Luke has darkness in himself, too.

So when Luke says that there's still good in him, there's no attempt to pretend that Anakin hasn't done monstrous things. Luke really can't pretend that Anakin didn't do them, he's literally stood there and watched as Anakin did some of them. He's down a hand for the rest of his life because of Anakin, he'll have to live with the evidence of what Anakin is capable of forever. He CAN'T sit there and pretend that Anakin didn't do those things the way Padme could, it isn't possible for him. For Padme, Anakin will always be "that little boy from Tatooine," just like she says in Attack of the Clones. But Luke knew Darth Vader first, he's known the villain and the monster longer than he'll ever know Anakin Skywalker. Even when he figures out how to reconcile that these two people are the SAME person, he doesn't know enough about Anakin Skywalker to be able to pretend that Darth Vader didn't do the things he's done. Luke says that there is still good in him with the full awareness that Darth Vader has made a LOT of horrific choices in his life. There's never any attempt to try to convince himself or anyone else that that isn't true.

He sees Anakin in the full truth of who and what he is. He knows EXACTLY what kind of darkness Anakin has in him and is choosing to believe he can still make a better choice ANYWAY. Unlike his mother, Luke knows who Anakin is, he's never been given another choice.

That's why Padme comes off as wrong about Anakin while Luke is right even though they both say the same thing. The line doesn't MEAN the same thing to both of them and the audience can pick up on that because both of them have had several films' worth of context letting us know that.

Extremely unpopular opinion but I know in my heart that Padmé Amidala would be awful parents to Luke and Leia. Padmé would refuse to talk to the children when they’re upset and the less said about Anakin ‘youngling slayer, hand cutter, “but the women and the children too” Skywalker the better tbh

I think it’s weird that people are convinced they would be the worlds best parents with the healthiest relationship, I’ve seen a lot of posts saying that Leia and Anakin would be super close when like.. Leia was a rebel and a feminist, in what way would Leia and fascist fanboy be bffs. I’ve seen the same that Padmé and Luke would wear matching outfits and gossip and all, but that’s not fitting with Luke’s character at all? Idk every time I see Luke in those family fics he’s infantilised to all hell - even besides that children aren’t copy’s of their parents, they have their own autonomy and personality.

Realistically Padmé and Anakin are far, far to obsessive over each other to give their children a healthy upbringing, Anakin choked Padmé (while pregnant) out of anger which makes me think abt what exactly he’d do if angry with the kids or Padmé? Like he cut off Luke’s hand, it definitely doesn’t bode well

^^Edit: looking back on this now abt Padmé being “alright with it” that wasn’t the case, sorry abt that one guys

I honestly believe that had she had lived long enough she would’ve tried to raise the children with Vader. Anakin never really seemed to care that much over the kids (I believe because it was a realisation that they couldn’t keep their affair hidden any longer and he would have to choose between being a father/husband or a Jedi) and I couldn’t imagine he’d be alright with Padmé having to give a lot of attention to the kids instead of him.

Ultimately Owen/Beru and Bail/Breha were the best options for raising the children seeing as the Jedi order was out of the question. The reason Luke and Leia turned out to be healthy, well adjusted adults is because of their respective adoptive parents (Aunt/uncle), not because of “to be angry is to be human” amidala and alderaan destroyer 2000 Skywalker

Sidenote: throughout RotS Padmé and Anakin barely even trust each other💀💀 how are 2 people who can’t trust one another supposed to raise kids cmon now

Broke: The reason Anidala is so toxic is because Anakin had PTSD that no one recognized or tried to treat.

Woke: The reason Anidala is so toxic is because Padme had PTSD that no one recognized or tried to treat.

Bespoke: Anakin had PTSD that the Jedi teachings would've helped him manage and overcome had Palpatine not interfered and poisoned Anakin against those teachings and encouraging him to lean into behaviors and habits that exacerbated his own PTSD which directly led to his behavior towards Padme and in their relationship that caused issues. In contrast, Padme had PTSD that she chose to set aside in order to keep functioning as Queen for the next three years and never dealt with or managed and cannot function without burying herself in work and in service of some kind which is why she sacrifices all of her childhood dreams of having a family to be a senator when asked after her terms end and she routinely refuses and rejects the care of people who truly care about her like her family and hides things from them in favor of playing out a fantasy with someone who cannot judge her for her own issues and isn't interested in her as a person enough to go looking or notice them anyway.

Rush Clovis was not, by any means, the injured party in his fight with Anakin Skywalker! He was forcing Padme to kiss him, and Anakin was just defending her! And, since you defend Clovis after he attempted such a heinous act of sexual violence against a woman, you don’t deserve to call yourself a woman! You Kenobists disgust me to my very soul!

Oh wow. Gee whirlickers. I wonder which of Anakin Skywalker’s anal suppositories inserted this in my mailbox. The writing style is sooooooo unidentifiable. Whatever shall I do.

In case you couldn’t tell (and knowing you, Domina…you can’t), that last paragraph was blatant sarcasm.

The last I checked, it was more than two years ago that this particular argument ended, and there hasn’t been hide nor hair of you seen in the Star Wars fandom since Rings of Power came out. Is the LotR fandom no longer responding to your incessant drama-mongering, Your Highness? Is that why you’re trudging up ancient history in a fandom so far beneath your standards as Star Wars?

Well, Your Worship, I’ll bite, just this one time. I have never, not even once, asserted that Rush Clovis was the injured party in that fight. I have only ever said that Anakin Skywalker is ALSO not the injured party.

The injured party is Padmé Amidala. Who was nearly kissed against her will (and yes, that is tantamount to attempted sexual assault). Who was sure that her beloved husband would come to her defense and stop the assault…only to have Anakin look her in the eye with disgust and say, “YOU have NO say in this!”

Anakin was not fighting to protect Padmé. He was trying to punish her, for something that was not her fault.

He SHOULD have defended her, yes, but instead he treated her like a cheater and a traitor, AND put her mission in considerable jeopardy. If Anakin had kept his head and non-violently escorted Clovis out of the apartment after the kiss was broken, Clovis might have believed Padmé’s argument that she and Anakin were just friends. Instead, he fell for Clovis’s obvious bait into a fight, which told Clovis all he needed to know: that Padmé was in love with someone else, and that she was only dating Clovis to spy on him. And that forced Clovis to accelerate his plans against the Republic, leading to him desperately putting a gun to Padmé’s head the very next episode.

Anakin did not defend Padmè. All he accomplished by beating the shit out of Clovis was putting Padmé in more danger. And if I had been Padmé, I’d have dumped his ass permanently.

That’s my last word on the matter. Now fuck off and get a paying job, Domina, if you can.

Sorry to bother you but I'm curious to know your thoughts on this.

I know it's not technically canon but the novelization does at point depict anakin wanting to leave the order to raise his kids and padme encouraging him to stay. I know he's his own person and all but having his wife pushing him to keep up the lies and secrets is kind a factor in his decisions I would say. Having someone you care for so deeply tell you to keep living a lie is definitely something that would mess with your brain and influence your perspective on things.

Idk. Just something that I feel is overlooked sometimes in the discussion of Anakin’s decision in not leaving. I would really love to know your thoughts on this.

“Anakin, not here. It’s too risky.” “No, here! Exactly here.” He drew her against him again, effortlessly overpowering her halfhearted resistance. “I’m tired of the deception. Of the sneaking and the lying. We have nothing to be ashamed of! We love each other, and we are married. Just like trillions of beings across the galaxy. This is something we should shout, not whisper—” “No, Anakin. Not like all those others. They are not Jedi. We can’t let our love force you out of the Order—” “Force me out of the Order?” He smiled down at her fondly. “Was that a pun?” “Anakin—” He could still make her angry without even trying. “Listen to me. We have a duty to the Republic. Both of us—but yours is now so much more important. You are the face of the Jedi, Anakin. Even after these years of war, many people still love the Jedi, and it’s mostly because they love you, do you understand that? They love the story of you. You’re like something out of a bedtime tale, the secret prince, hidden among the peasants, growing up without ever a clue of his special destiny—except for you it’s all true. Sometimes I think that the only reason the people of the Republic still believe we can win the war is because you’re fighting it for them—” “And it always comes back to politics for you,” Anakin said. His smile had gone now. “I’m barely even home, and you’re already trying to talk me into going back to the war—”

yeah so i think that padmé's encouragement to live the lie is deeply unhelpful. if i recall correctly, there are two key times anakin thinks about leaving the order, both of which are in her presence, and yet she is the one who offers pressure back toward staying. the above passage is taken from right after they are reunited, and it is so telling to me. padmé loves him as her husband, yes, but she also sees him as larger than life, and says things that absolutely feed his ego. she encourages him to think the rules don't apply to him, because he is so important and special.

she doesn't take his commitment to the order seriously with respect to what it means to be a jedi, but she wants him to stay there anyway. i think that this kind of encouragement is rather similar to palpatine's manipulations, though she definitely has less sinister motives, the result is the same. her permission to break rules exacerbates the potential weaknesses in his character that lead to his fall. it compounds with sidious's maneuvering. her pressure makes him feel like not only a tool of the jedi but also the democratic opposition, unable to have what he wants because of politics and duty that he doesn't personally care about. all he cares about is getting what he wants.

i honestly don't know if he was ever genuinely serious about leaving the order. he clearly does not take his commitment seriously, but he also craves the power that having high status in the order brings, both in terms of access to force training and the glory of being the youngest council member. he thinks of leaving only when he's directly looking at padmé, not otherwise. so basically it's unclear to me whether or not he actually meant to leave, but what is not unclear is that padmé absolutely pressured him and flattered him, manipulating him and trying to use him (not with bad intentions! with the best of intentions!), and it encourages him to the edge of darkness. his perspective is absolutely shaped by her words.

i just believe that they make each other worse. that is the tragedy of their relationship imho. they love each other, and it harms them both.

Padmé didn’t give Anakin the ‘safe place to express his emotions that the JeDi nEVer GavE hiM’

She enabled his rage, instability, and murderous tendencies and gave him a space where he could do anything he wanted without judgment or consequences.

Interesting, thought-provoking relationship dynamic that makes the prequel trilogy a fascinating watch? Yes

A relationship that should be heralded as truly romantic or sweet? Heck no.

you know what this has probably been said before but anakin being so infatuated with padme after ten years without seeing her doesn't make sense (but then again, it's anakin guy's the master of being this level of ride or die) and especially it doesn't make sense to my mind how former queen of naboo and then senator of the republic with a politic career since she was like ten decided to MARRY anakin out of pure looks and gratitude for him saving her and her planet like I get it her wanting to sit on his face LIKE CMON but marrying him? if they write that they have been friends for that long and padme took him to brunch and tea and rant about her days with him listening to her and making her laugh i'd totally understand her marrying him by the end of attack of the clones but it's clueless to me why she did it with a guy she hasn't seen in ten motherfucker years and on the first ever date dude said dictatorship would solve the problems faster not to mention the questionable attraction between them like george....george......

I just came across a post someone made where they basically just said that Padme telling Anakin “it’s human to be angry” after he commits the Tusken Massacre is fine because she was “empathizing with him” and also criticizing the SW fandom via satire for criticizing Padme for that and saying that there was still good in him.

So one thing I need people to understand before they ever start getting on the- “you can’t criticize Padme, she did nothing wrong, she was just in love” -soapbox, is that her and Anakin’s love story is inherently toxic on both ends.

There is no version of their story that ends well if they stay together.

Anakin is a narcissistic abuser*, and Padme is an enabler of his behavior.

(*Keep in mind, when I say “Anakin is an abuser,” I mean the emotional abuser sort—as he doesn’t ever physically harm her until RotS)

This post is primarily about Padme, though, so I’ll just make another post analyzing Anakin—if that’s something y’all would be interested in.

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Think about it, though.

Anakin commits mass murder, including the murder of literal children, and Padme—someone who the fandom loves to point to as being morally perfect—basically says that it’s fine because being angry- (and committing mass murder because of it ig) -is normal.

She even rewards him by marrying him like, what is it, a day later? And she never tells anyone about it because god forbid Anakin face any consequences.

Anakin almost beats a man to death and then blames Padme for her own assault, she says he scares her and they need to take a break…but then she goes back to him soon after and apparently forgets all about the whole- “almost beating a man to death” -thing and is so excited to raise a family with him.

Because growing up in a household where their father regularly gets incredibly angry, and physically violent when he is, totally won’t traumatize the kid or anything! Raising children with a child-murderer totally isn’t cause for concern!

Anakin takes part in a genocide, massacres the Temple, ONCE AGAIN MURDERS CHILDREN…and she’s still begging him to stay with her so they can raise their perfect little family on Naboo.

And apparently he’s still a good person.

Right.

—————

Anakin never receives any consequences or pushback from Padme for his actions/behavior and, on the rare occasions she does push back, she goes running back to him—plowing over her own boundaries—almost immediately because she refuses to let go of her own delusional fantasies about their relationship.

That is what people are criticizing for, not for falling in love in the first place.

Anakin has his own set of issues that make the relationship toxic, but Padme also takes part in that toxicity by enabling his behavior—and people are well within their rights to criticize her for it, just like they should criticize Anakin.

Maybe it's because I don't find Anakin even slightly attractive, particularly in AotC, but like. The whole obsession he has for Padme in the beginning of the movie makes me so viscerally, deeply uncomfortable, and clearly Padme doesn't vibe with it either.

Just - that scene where Anakin and Obi-Wan are talking, and Anakin says Padme covered the cameras is such an example of that. Anakin's whole "I don't think she liked me watching her" is clearly meant to be funny but it also just makes my skin crawl. And Padme knows the danger she's in, she knows precisely who's after her, so her covering the cameras despite that? I'd assume that means she's also deeply uncomfortable with it.

You know, because one of the reasons you can't get married as a Jedi is because you are supposed to put the needs of the Galaxy before them, implies the Jedi believe a Spouse should be your priority if you're married. Proving that Anakin fails at that too. If he put Padme's needs first, he would have told Yoda what was happening instead of that vague "someone close to me is going to die" dreams shit. Anakin's priority, is Anakin.

I think it's more about expectations. Usually when you get married, there's an expectation that you WILL put your spouse above all else, and that's generally totally fine. A lot of marriage vows include word choices to that effect anyway, as well as this idea that you will remain with this one person for the rest of your life no matter what, etc etc.

THEORETICALLY, you could get married WITHOUT some of these expectations, but then at that point you kind-of run into the question of "why get married rather than just be in a regular relationship then?" What benefits do you get from marriage if you cut out the promise of forever and expectation of being a priority in your spouse's life?

There's also the political aspect of it. Jedi are supposed to be neutral and give equal attention to all of the planets in the Republic and treat all people equally no matter where they're from. But if you're married to someone from a specific planet, even if they're not a political leader of some sort, it sort-of generates a greater connection to that planet and perhaps an expectation that the Jedi might prioritize that planet above others if needed. And that obviously causes problems with the Jedi's neutrality as ambassadors/government workers. (Sidenote: This is why I don't think Obi-Wan would've been in a relationship with Bail and/or Breha even if it were casual because the political issues would still exist no matter what.)

So basically I think they discourage/forbid marriage just to eliminate the TEMPTATION of all of those things. Same with having children, generally. They MIGHT be able to get married and have kids without having the political or personal problems, but they can't really promise it'll NEVER be an issue at any point unless they just abstain. Why put themselves in that position if they don't have to? They can always leave the Order to go have those things if they feel particularly necessary to their happiness in life, obviously, no one's forcing them to stay.

And then Anakin marries Padme and we see him CONSTANTLY put his personal relationship to her above his duty as a Jedi. He literally says as much to Padme in that episode in season 1 where he claims that their feelings for each other should be more important than their ideals. We see Anakin demand things of Padme because they're married which shows that he absolutely has these expectations that Padme will prioritize his needs and wants simply because he's her husband. Anakin's big problem is that he refuses to commit to either the Jedi OR Padme entirely because he's selfish enough to want both without realizing the ways in which he's disrespecting both relationships. Padme doesn't always get the time with him that SHE wants (or the ability to have a family openly) and the Jedi have to live with him blowing them off to go play house with Padme or him being overly emotional on a mission if Padme is involved.

The Jedi aren't necessarily saying a spouse SHOULD get all of your attention, just that it's a normal EXPECTATION from married couples that that's what will happen, and if that expectation isn't met, it can lead to misery and discord in the relationship.

So yes, Anakin fails at prioritizing Padme, too, because he's refusing to commit to her, either. He wants to have his cake and eat it, too, he wants to be married to a sitting Senator AND be a Jedi. He wants to be a big damn hero and prioritize the people and places he cares about most and have all of the power that is afforded to the Jedi specifically because they DON'T do those things all at the same time. He fails Padme and the Jedi in much the same way, and that's honestly a major aspect of his whole character.

Random Thoughts on Star Wars Ships (Part One)

First, I’m going to focus on toxic Star Wars ships that I absolutely despise. There are three. They are all canon. Some of them are more serious than others, but all of them are incredibly pernicious and problematic. To say they’re my “least favorite” would be selling my hatred of them short, but yeah… the word “loathe” comes to mind. They are as follows:

1.) Luxsoka (aka Ahsoka Tano and Lux Bonteri)

This is my least favorite ship of them all because watching it unfold at times was physically painful. Part of me doesn’t understand it, but the other part of me knows that it was likely just a tepid attempt by Filoni egged on by Lucas to make Ahsoka more relatable. It didn’t work.

I guess the premise didn’t start out too bad with “Heroes on Both Sides” aside from the fact that it sort of felt forced and completely unnecessary, but holy fuck did it go off the rails fast!

Lux’s behavior in “A Friend in Need” was completely unacceptable and inexcusable. I mean, less than 10 minutes into that episode, Lux is threatening to shoot Ahsoka with a deadly firearm, followed by him stunning her unconscious, stealing her ship, hiding her lightsabers from her, then meeting up with known terrorists with anti-Jedi sentiment and history of violence against Jedi. Then, there’s the unwanted kiss. He just sort of grabs her and kisses her against her will to shut her up. She tries to wiggle herself out of it, and when she finally succeeds you can tell she’s PISSED. Rightfully so. Technically, that’s sexual assault. The episode ends with Ahsoka somehow being more fond of him, I guess… I assume it’s related to trauma. I don’t know.

Anyway, the last time we see them together is in the Onderon arc, Lux has fallen for and appears to be in a romantic relationship with Steela Gerrera, and Ahsoka finds a way get over him, which, good for her. It takes two episodes (of a four episode arc) of her being completely insufferable, but she gets there. Ahsoka deserved better anyway. By the end of the arc, she sort of does this attaboy shoulder slug to Lux after Steela kisses him for luck. By that point, Ahsoka probably also found Steela to be pretty hot, and at least one of them got to kiss her. Steela should have kissed you, Ahsoka, but we can’t win them all.

Filoni basically said he was experimenting with this anyway, and I would say that this particular experiment was an abject failure. I’m just glad that it fizzed out before it ever became anything. It was trash. Utter fucking trash.

2.) Anidala (aka Anakin Skywalker and Padme Amidala)

This is another toxic relationship that I don’t really understand. No. I mean, I do get it. It’s a plot point that gets us to a specific place in a character’s development.

It’s unfortunate really. Padme is supposed to be this badass strong, independent woman, and yet, she blatantly ignores countless red flags during “Attack of the Clones” that should have made her turn away… Anakin being generally creepy, crossing her boundaries, frequently interrupting her, admitting to being a dictatorial fascist… I guess I could technically write all of that off because sometimes your brain short-circuits when you’re in love, and you miss red flags. But… genocide? That was a bridge too far. She should have ran. She should have reported the incident to the Jedi council, but she didn’t because she’s “in love” and actually just a prop.

Their relationship didn’t get much better during the Clone Wars. Anakin guilted her often when she chose duty over desire, something her role in the galaxy required. It was also pretty apparent that Anakin didn’t trust her as far as he could throw her based on the way he acted during the Rush Clovis arcs. There was a point where it felt like their relationship should have ended during season six. Padme needed a break, and told Anakin that she just couldn’t do it anymore after Anakin brutally beat the dog shit out of Clovis. But then, more trauma. Maybe the moral of the story is to avoid “romantic” relationships when you’re in the midst of a traumatic experience because it’s going to end badly, I don’t know.

Then he kills her in “Revenge of the Sith”. Well. He force chokes her and she dies of a broken heart… and then he proceeds to lose his shit, force crushing an entire room with overwhelming emotion (say what you will about the Jedi and their obsession with not forming attachments and overcoming feelings but… *gestures vaguely at this incident right here*).

It’s just an incredibly disastrous toxic sludge of a relationship. And, I know I was more vague about this one, but honestly, I could write a novel about it… so, I’ll spare you.

3.) Reylo (aka Rey Palpatine/Skywalker and Kylo Ren)

I hate this one too… mainly because Kylo tells Rey that she’s “nothing” except to him in “The Last Jedi” and that bothers me. This is something a narcissist might say to someone they’re abusing and gaslighting in an attempt to make them stick around, and that is just gross.

If Rey had actually been a nobody, it may have been less offensive, but she’s a fucking Palpatine. She’s not a nobody. Her grandfather (who isn’t actually her “grandfather” as her father was just a Palpatine clone, and goddamn, I’m going to need a better explanation for all of that shit because it just makes me dizzy, but I digress) was an oppressive emperor that reigned in terror for decades. She’s far from a nobody. In fact, Kylo’s grandfather (actual grandfather, not a clone) was Palpatine’s bitch. He should at least show her a little respect.

He was also generically mean to her during the entire sequel trilogy.

This one ended in death too, but at least it was Kylo’s and not Rey’s death. Again, Rey exhibited this weird mental exercise where she sees Kylo Ren and Ben Solo as two different people instead of them being one-in-the-same (much like the mental gymnastics that everyone does with Vader), so she tries to validate the whole thing. But, he’s an asshole too. She should have faced it.

If Anakin had never fallen, and he and Padme had raised Luke and Leia together, they wouldn’t have been good parents, and I don’t think their relationships would’ve properly lasted.

This is not to say they wouldn’t have absolutely LOVED their children, but that wouldn’t have been enough to make them great parents.

Leia being raised by Breha and Bail, and Luke being raised by Owen and Beru was actually really good for them.

(sucks they couldn’t have grown up together though, but the way they grew up clearly influenced both of them and was a huge factor that led them to become the great, kind, stubborn leaders that they are)

After reading this post by @ahsoka-in-a-hood, it occurred me to that this is exactly why I really don't like the way Obi-Wan's history with Satine is written.

Because it's not about Obi-Wan.

Obitine as a SHIP isn't about Obi-Wan.

It's about Anakin.

I've been looking at the moment where Obi-Wan confesses that he would have left the Jedi Order had Satine said the word as a take on a crisis of faith storyline for Obi-Wan, similar to ones seen in the Melida/Daan arc in Jedi Apprentice and, most recently, the Padawan book and Obi-Wan Kenobi show. And in that case, it fails. Entirely.

Because in order for it to be a good crisis of faith storyline, to me, it needs to have a moment where Obi-Wan actively chooses to remain a Jedi, where he recognizes he's on the wrong path and comes back. He can leave for a time, he can stray, he can question, that's the whole point. But it has to be Obi-Wan's choice to come back to the Jedi because he recognizes that it's the right path for him, that it's the path he WANTS to take.

And the line "I would have left the Jedi Order, if you had said the word" removes all choice from Obi-Wan. Because what's left unsaid here is, "I only stayed in the Jedi Order because you DIDN'T say the word." Which puts all of the power of choice onto Satine, not Obi-Wan. And we don't even hear why Satine didn't ask him to stay, whether it's because she just didn't realize he liked her enough to stay or because she recognized they would never truly work out even if he did stay for her. Obi-Wan nearly leaving the Jedi Order for Satine has no real impact on Obi-Wan's character because the reason as to why he DIDN'T is so passive. He's not acting, he's REACTING.

But it was never about Obi-Wan. It was about Anakin.

Obi-Wan's ENTIRE relationship with Satine and, arguably, Satine's entire character, is about being a metaphor/foil for Anakin (and Padme/Anidala). That's it.

Obi-Wan and Satine have a history where they went through a traumatic experience together where Obi-Wan was helping Satine escape a war on her planet that she was the ruler of, this war has a major impact on Satine's ideologies as we see them in the present day, Obi-Wan and Satine barely seem to truly agree on much of anything, their disagreements cause them to react unprofessionally in public. There's a lot of similarities in the dynamic set up between Obi-Wan and Satine, and Anakin and Padme.

Because Obitine is just a way to use Obi-Wan to showcase what Anakin (and Padme) should've done. Obi-Wan and Satine walk away because they both recognize this relationship is never going to truly work. They don't agree on much of anything, but both of them know that because they confront each other about things the other says or does they disagree with rather than brushing it under the rug and pretending it didn't happen. Obi-Wan and Satine allow duty to come first, but also appear to recognize that even if one of them gave up duty, the relationship would be doomed. They care about each other because they have a bond from spending a year on the run together, but this does not make them GOOD for each other and they're both smart and honest enough to recognize that and so, even after Satine pressures Obi-Wan into making a confession of love to her, neither of them acts on it.

And then, of course, in The Lawless, we see Obi-Wan facing Satine in a lot of danger and is unable to do very much to help her because of restrictions placed on him via the Senate and the Council, so he chooses to BEND some rules in order to allow him to give what help he can without bringing untold harm to everyone around him, and when he fails, he refuses to let it sink him into darkness. He makes a whole speech about it that's particularly on the nose, obviously, and it's pretty pointed towards "This is what Anakin should've done and didn't."

This is why Obitine just doesn't appeal to me, because it's not really about Satine or Obi-Wan at all. Satine is a prop, a Padme knock-off, intentionally. She's just there to show what Padme should've done, but also to be a catalyst to showcase through Obi-Wan what Anakin should've done. Obi-Wan's allowed zero real agency in this relationship because his "choice" to stay with the Jedi isn't there to actually say anything about Obi-Wan or further our understanding of him as a character, but simply for the audience to go "ah yes, the opposite of Anakin." Made even more heavy-handed by Anakin coming in 2 seconds later and killing someone to the tune of the Imperial March because the show decided to conveniently forget Jedi have telekinesis in favor of reminding everyone that Anakin's going to go dark side soon.

It's not a crisis of faith storyline, it's not an Obi-Wan backstory even. It's just a metaphor for Anakin and Padme.

I know this is not your cup and of tea I just needed to scream into the void. Between Padmé and Ahsoka always seemed a better fit for Anakin as a life partner. I’m sorry

don't apologize lmao i think the premise that padmé is not actually the best life partner for anakin (and vice versa) is actually a big theme of the prequels. the idea they both would be happier and healthier elsewhere is part of the tragedy i think. ahsoka understands both anakin's experiences as a jedi and the dangerous temptation of the dark side of the force in away padmé cannot. there's stability and coherence in identity when he's romantically involved with another jedi, and ahsoka's personality suits his well. the void is listening and says you're valid haha