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aethon-recs · 10 months

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Tomarrymort Advanced Pack – 12 Longfic Recs

If you’ve made your way through the Tomarrymort Starter Pack and Intermediate Pack reads, here are 12 beautifully written, timeless fics that are Tomarrymort on hard mode for when you’re ready to dive into something that will really challenge your every reading muscle. This selection of fics features some of the most skilled writing I’ve come across in the entire fandom, and I love how these authors tackle incredibly complex subject matter and plotlines and characterization choices with such bold and unflinching perspectives.

Please mind all tags (including CCNTW, explained here) as you may find some themes within some of these fics difficult or challenging to read for a variety of reasons.

This is Part 3 of a 3-part series (see here for Part 1 and Part 2). I hope you get as much enjoyment from reading these additional 3.1 million words of incredible Tomarrymort longfic as I have!

Tomarrymort Advanced Reads

ǟʟʍǟɢɛֆȶ by eldritcher (M, 134k, complete)

Setting: Canon Divergence – Book 6 Premise: If Harry and Dumbledore team up with Voldemort to save the magical world from a catastrophic threat. Why I rec it: Eldritcher delivers one of the most epic love stories of a lifetime — with Harry and Voldemort surviving a trip to the moon and back, and Harry’s love for Voldemort transcending time and space after Voldemort makes the ultimate sacrifice to save the world and, against all odds, return to Harry. The prose is absolutely transcendent — amongst the best I’ve encountered not only in fanfic, but in all of fiction I’ve ever read. I can’t say enough about how much I love Elditcher’s writing style and how beautifully the story unfolds — there’s a very nice lyrical rhythm underlying all the sentence structure and word choice in the fic that flows like nothing else I’ve read before.

Anabiosis by @itsevanffs (E, 32k, WIP)

Setting: Canon Divergence Pre-Book 1 Premise: If Voldemort resurrects early and takes a teaching job at Harry’s primary school. Why I rec it: This is one of the best and most realistic and gutting depictions I’ve ever read of the quiet tragedy of Harry’s pre-Hogwarts years growing up experiencing severe neglect and an absence of love throughout his entire childhood. @itsevanffs did a magnificent job of capturing Harry’s limited POV and all the fluttering hope his still-trusting heart holds when he meets Mr Riddle, the first teacher who’s ever treated him with kindness. My heart ached so much for Harry throughout this fic, and the emotional arc in this story has continued to haunt me for a very long time afterwards.

Eight Days a Week by @vestiges-of-light (E, 802k, complete)

Setting: Canon Divergence – Book 7 Premise: If Voldemort captures Harry shortly after his sixth year, which leads to an unlikely truce and eventual partnership that ends up saving the magical world. Why I rec it: This fic combines a sprawling political epic with an incredibly extensive exploration of kink. The author asks a great question in the tags: "Why is only vanilla sex literary?" — and this fic does a fantastic job of proving that messy, filthy, raw sex scenes don’t have to be made sanitized or palatable for mainstream consumption in order to have just as much of a place in a plot-driven, serious longfic as vanilla sex does. Against the high-stakes backdrop of international political intrigue, there’s a very nice domesticity to Harry and Voldemort’s relationship, and how much they trust each other and can be stripped bare and vulnerable in front of each other is very poignant and touching to read about.

Embryo by @cannibalinc (NR, 28k, WIP)

Setting: Time Travel (1940s) Premise: If mysterious new transfer student Harry appears in Tom’s sixth year in a state of near complete amnesia. Why I rec it: One of the defining character traits of Tom Riddle is that he’s an absolute genius — the most talented academic mind to ever walk through the doors of Hogwarts — and this fic absolutely delivers on that aspect. Told from Tom’s POV, this fic is like reading a complex multidisciplinary text spanning philosophy and physics and mathematics and magical theory, all interconnected by the mystery of how Harry appeared and where he came from and why he is so utterly forgettable to everyone but Tom.

found by @honbug (E, 112k, WIP)

Setting: Non-Magical AU Premise: If Tom grows up in a world with no magic, but has had strange recurring dreams his whole life — dreams of a boy with green eyes and a scar, dreams of a dark graveyard and magical snakes and other mysterious things. Why I rec it: The character work done in this fic is absolutely breathtaking — one of the best character studies of Tom Riddle I’ve ever come across. This is a Tom who grew up without magic, but is no less cold and vicious and psychopathic and teetering on the edge of madness. The story arc follows Tom from his early childhood through his rise as a ruthless leader in an organized crime syndicate not unlike the Death Eaters — all the while that he’s haunted by dreams of Harry, his Harry, even as the dreams start to drive him to the brink of insanity.

how large the teeth by MaidenMotherCrone (E, 257k, complete)

Setting: Voldemort Wins AU Premise: If Harry grows up as an outcast in a world where Grindelwald and Voldemort have already won long before he is born, but he’s still the subject of a prophecy that designates him as their world’s savior. Why I rec it: The worldbuilding is so exquisite and complex in this fic — the author did a spectacular job at completely reimagining the wizarding world from the ground up if the Dark Lord were to win a long time ago and how their extremely inequitable society would subsequently be structured. Harry’s defiance throughout is lovely, and his growing entanglement with Voldemort adds to all the high-stakes and risky moves that he makes throughout the fic. The plotline is very action-packed — a lot of complex plot threads are interwoven throughout the story, with an undercurrent of revolution and discontent simmering under the surface until it explodes in a glorious finale.

In Willing Sacrifice by @hikarimeroperiddle (M, 1,197k, WIP)

Setting: Canon Divergence – Book 4 Premise: If Harry finds Voldemort in Riddle Manor the summer before his fourth year, and enters into an unlikely alliance with him before returning to school that year. Why I rec it: This fic covers so much ground — at 1.2 million words (so far!), it’s the most detailed rewrite of canon starting from book 4 that I’ve ever come across, weaving in plenty of magical theory and political intrigue as Voldemort takes Harry under his protection initially in a mentor capacity. The relationship between Harry and Voldemort unfolds in such a beautiful way in this fic — with Harry growing to fall in love with Voldemort, despite all of Voldemort’s murderous and violent qualities, without losing an ounce of his humanity or the inherent goodness inside of his heart along the way.

Lover's Spit by @pinktom, @k3uuu (E, 88k, WIP)

Setting: Non-Magical AU Premise: If Harry and Tom grow up in a small town together in northern England, and Tom has harbored an obsession for Harry ever since primary school. Why I rec it: An absolutely stunning coming-of-age story set in modern times. This story is striking in so many different ways. It perfectly captures the voice of fringe internet communities in such an authentic way. It also poignantly captures the social isolation and erosion of privacy from living in a small town where gossip spreads like wildfire, and how the internet amplifies these dynamics. At the core of the story is a really sweet love story between Tom and Harry that I am literally obsessed with — every single one of their interactions is so tender and pure — and it’s such a startling contrast to how Tom’s internet persona is portrayed that makes the sweetness all the more heartfelt.

Mi Aedijekit by @kitastrophea (M, 282k, WIP)

Setting: Post-Canon Premise: If Harry is captured by Voldemort and placed under the Draught of Living Death, only to awaken in the far future where Voldemort has ruled over their world for over a thousand years. Why I rec it: A linguistic and sociological tour de force. When Harry wakes up from his magical coma over a thousand years into the future, the world has been entirely transformed, and the skill and effort that the author undertook in fleshing out a society where there’s been a thousand years of cultural change and evolution in language can’t be understated. One of the most unique and fun aspects of the story is learning the new vocabulary of the future alongside Harry for the first time. I love how the fic examines how even Voldemort gets bored with immortality after a millennia of ruling — and how, even with a thousand years separating them and memories of the earlier times scattered to the wind, Harry and Voldemort are still inextricably drawn together.

Of Kings, Of Pawns, and Of Men by @ambivalens999 (E, 129k, WIP)

Setting: Canon Divergence – Book 5 Premise: If Voldemort ends up in Harry’s body and Harry ends up in Tom Riddle’s body after a bad encounter with the dementors at the beginning of book 5, and they can’t figure out how to swap back. Why I rec it: This is such an interesting take on the bodyswap trope, which is given a very serious and plotty treatment here. For fear of the safety of his friends, Harry has to go along with returning to his 5th year at Hogwarts in Tom Riddle’s body and being sorted into Slytherin house, while Tom passes himself off as Harry Potter. There’s a mystery behind the depth of Tom’s knowledge and familiarity with Harry, as he knows more about Harry than even Voldemort should. Is it the scar horcrux? Is it Voldemort? Is it something else entirely? The inherent combativeness and magnetism between Harry and Tom keep the tension high as they push each other’s buttons and circle around each other like wolves trying to establish dominance.

Phobia by @katsitting (E, 48k, complete)

Setting: Post-Canon Premise: If Voldemort captures Harry and brutally tortures him to the point of breaking. Why I rec it: This fic does not sugarcoat Voldemort’s capacity for cruelty and sadism in any way, and I admire the author’s commitment to depicting the most horrific of scenarios. Having read countless fics with this setup, I’ll be honest, the depiction in this fic is probably the most likely outcome of any Voldemort-captures-Harry scenario. They do not fall in love. It is not a fun time for Harry. There is gore; there is brutal prisoner torture; there is extremely extensive non-con. I found it very raw and unvarnished — not an easy read, but a very memorable and evocative one. And yet, despite the themes of darkness explored in this fic, it ends on a note of hope.

The Foul (part 1) / The Great (part 2) by @meles-merrivale (M, 24k, complete)

Setting: Time Travel Premise: If Harry gets thrown back in time a thousand years into the past, and does whatever it takes to stay alive until he can meet up with Voldemort again. Why I rec it: This is a fantastic depiction of the slow descent into madness following a disastrous time travel accident and what a thousand years of immortality does to one’s sanity. It’s also a great exploration of the time travel paradox and whether anyone has the power to change the past, or if pivotal historical events are, by their very nature, predetermined. By the time Harry encounters Voldemort again, he is a shell of the person he used to be, but gradually, he finds more of his original humanity and spark for life the more his relationship with Voldemort progresses.

#Tomarrymort Advanced Reads #tomarrymort #tomarry #harrymort #aethon recs #tomarry recs #tomarrymort recs #harrymort recs #hp fic recs #longfic recs #ao3 recs #fanfic recs #tom riddle #voldemort #harry potter

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tomlinfonda · 1 year

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Inside me there are two wolves.

One who thinks that the writers are either stupid or cruel, and that the finale was so incomprehensibly bad that I shouldn't try to make sense of it. And that I should move on.

The other one is a subtext-and-metaphor-hungry beast that is manically obsessed with finding a reason, at least subtextually, for the incomprehensible mess they made out of these characters, especially Ted, in the finale.

Everyone is so right to point out that Ted in previous episodes would not have acted like this. I think the reason for the sudden regression in his character is Dottie.

That morning, full of smiles, in a good mood, Ted starts his walk to work.

He cheerfully strolls through the streets, saying hello to his neighbors, making chit-chat with them. He is (as Trent said it in 1x03) out there in the community. He is, more importantly, part of a community. Until suddenly-

"Mom?"

Dottie's arrival changes everything. Ted gets worse and worse throughout the episode. In the hotel room in Manchester, the football anthem "Blue Moon", with the haunting lyric "You saw me standing alone" plays over Ted's lonesome figure, in the shadows, depressed.

Juxtapose that with his first scene: the lively neighborhood and daylight.

At the end of the episode, his conversation with his (manipulative) mom hits him deep. He feels immense guilt over not being there for Henry. And he's been torn over this for the entire season.

His mom, and the way she acts, and the way she manipulates him, push him in the wrong direction: Kansas.

I think Ted has disassociated for most of the finale. But I also think that he is intentionally pushing people away. Maybe he thinks that this will make it easier for him to leave, maybe he thinks that this will make it easier for them to let him go. Maybe he just hates himself so much that he cannot accept their help. Maybe he feels guilty that they're showing him so much love, when he knows he will abandon them.

Either way, he quits. Something that he would not have done, even in season 1. So his regression goes farther than the first episode, deeper into his past. He goes from:

to having doubts on the plane about leaving without winning the whole fucking thing

but leaving anyway.

And this is one of the most curious things to me. Rebecca offers to bring Henry to him in England by helping relocate Michelle:

And yet, he refuses. So, sure, this is about being there for his son. But given the choice between his son with his beloved community, and his son without his beloved community, he chooses the latter.

I've heard the argument that we don't know for sure that Ted doesn't have a support system in Kansas. But from a narrative perspective, it's important that we haven't been shown that hypothetical support system at all. And given that he actually returns to Kansas without the one person who we know supported him before coming to England, it comes across as a terribly isolating situation.

So why would Ted choose to part from his found family, even though bringing his son into that family would be an option? My theory is that he just really fucking hates himself. I think he wants to punish himself, maybe for being away from Henry for so long, maybe for something else. I don't think he believes that he deserves love or even credit for how he helped the club.

I mean, Rebecca and Trent offer him exactly that this episode: credit for what the did for the club.

And he rejects them both, choosing instead to remove himself from their lives, to erase himself from the narrative.

I think he's lower mentally than we've seen him for a while.

I think he's in his dark forest.

So the plane departs and then lands. And Ted is back in Kansas, driven through the prosaic, picket-fenced, isolating, depressing American suburbs to the house where Henry and the ex-wife who doesn't love him are waiting for him.

And the light might be golden, and he might be reunited with his son. But as we close in on the last shot of the show, you can see his smile try to fight the sadness in his eyes and you know.

He's not happy.

#ted lasso #ted lasso spoilers

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aroacewxs · 4 months

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my personal interpretation of cyberpunk dead boy

finished the event story today (thank you sekai.best my dear buddy pal) and looped the comm numerous times and studied the lyrics under a microscope, so i will now ramble a bit about my thoughts!! spoilers for backlit lens flare.

cyberpunk dead boy, from what i can tell, describes how modern consumerism and fame affects artists. it tells the story of an artist who started out with big dreams of portraying their feelings through their work, but slowly began spiralling into this pit of numbers and recognition and a vain desire for attention. whatever they wanted to communicate with their audience no longer has any substance or thought. they are then left wondering about whatever it is they dreamed of before this. what was the story they wanted to tell? does it even matter anymore?

cyberpunk "dead boy." the artist no longer lives for their art. there is nothing to breathe life into. are they even alive at this point?

on the other hand, we are also given the perspective of the consumers. consumers who don't care about the thought put into a piece of art, consumers who only care about whether this will make them feel good or not.

when you connect these two, you get a vain, lost artist who no longer sees their audience as individual human beings, but as VIEWERS. BUYERS. and these members of the audience are also trapped in this loop of consuming, throwing away, and finding something else to sink their teeth into. there is nothing meaningful being created.

rui's 4 star illustrates these audience members quite well. see, none of the passing people are. people. they have electronic devices for heads, and they're all glued to their phones. the little child holding their parent's hand, it should be a very wholesome and endearing sight, but it just feels wrong. there is no connection being developed between the two. this card depicts this haunting dystopian society where art no longer carries any weight for the human race, and we are all just left as hollow vessels with a mindless desire for meaningless entertainment. we don't develop any connections with other human beings, and the feelings that rui wants to evoke within his audience are futile.

on that note, the themes in this comm and the cards are incredibly oppositional to rui's own philosophy. what HE wants to achieve with his own art, his dream. compared to the thoughtless robots this artist sees their audience as, rui is incredibly caring and treats every single living being with such soft tenderness. he sees his audience as people. everything around him, the nature, the interactions he has with others, every single detail in his environment is a source of inspiration for his work. every single detail means that much to him. and whenever rui encounters a new artwork, a new play or story, he never just plays it off like "YUP another play. same old." he practically takes apart each layer one by one, studies it intently and tries to understand what kind of meaning the artist wanted to communicate. he then applies it to his own life, and to his own work. to think that rui would ever treat art and stories as something to just be eaten, thrown out, and forgotten about, is unfathomable.

this only leads me to wonder about the role sakaki will play in wxs's current arc. we ended off the story with ohara explaining to sakaki that rui is interested in stage production, and would probably encounter him again in the future. the way they framed this cliffhanger makes it only correct to assume that sakaki will return and will have a bigger part to play in wxs's story and their development.

sakaki intrigues me. his manner of speaking is very light and careless, his mannerisms even more so. compared to ohara, who is incredibly headstrong and burning like the sun with passion for his work and every single detail that is put into it, sakaki treats these details like they're just. there. takes one look at the scene ohara is having trouble with and it clicks instantly in his head. says some cryptic shit and packs his bag to leave.

furthermore, considering that most event commissions are written for the characters, for the story in that event, i really wonder who this song is about? is it about sakaki? will rui encounter this exact same problem about wondering what it was he wanted to portray from the beginning (unlikely imo, but would be interesting to see). nothing in backlit lens flare even remotely hints toward the lyricism in cyberpunk dead boy (i may have missed something, correct me if im wrong) which only excites me more for their next focus hehehe !!!

this was just a bunch of word vomit,, thank you for bearing with me, hopefully it makes sense?!?

#project sekai #wxs #wonderlands x showtime #rui kamishiro #kamishiro rui #jay does a think

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myfairkatiecat · 2 months

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I wrote a song from the perspective of Jolie Ruewen

You guys voted for a song to Brant after her death, so here it is! I’ve been looking for an excuse to use this chord progression (which is ironic, cause I actually messed up the piano on the last chorus in this recording). Anyway, I hope you enjoy it! Thank you all for your support!

Lyrics under the cut:

I knew I was playing with fire

I shouldn’t be shocked I got burned

I understood you when no one else did

And I know my love was returned

I know I felt dangerously guilty

I should have known you were acting strange

The world wasn’t kind to you, it wasn’t fair

But I can’t forgive how you’ve changed

I still see our shadows on the walls

Of every place we’ve been

And I still hear the sweet, sweet words

That flowed to me from your pen

But our end was the beginning

Of something I can’t ignore

The scars are not the reason

I don’t recognize you anymore

She is one way that I haunt you

I know you see me on her face

I hope that you also see all that I stood for

And think of the past you’ve erased

I still see our shadows on the walls

Of every place we’ve been

And I still hear the sweet, sweet words

That flowed to me from your pen

But our end was the beginning

Of something I can’t ignore

The scars are not the reason

I don’t recognize you anymore

I hope you never forget me

Cause I know that you’ll always care

I hope you imagine what I’d say to you

Doing all these things if I was there

I’d say I still see our shadows on the walls

Of every place we’ve been

And I still hear the sweet, sweet words

That flowed to me from your pen

But our end was the beginning

Of something I can’t ignore

The scars are not the reason

I don’t recognize you anymore

#kotlc #keeper of the lost cities #Kotlc songs #original music #jolie ruewen

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natimiles · 4 months

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Just let me adore you (Arthur)

Summary: You loved Mozart, and Mozart loved you. Arthur would just have to deal with it and not bother you again. But it’s easier said than done when you’re left alone on your own birthday.

Words: 1372

Tags: angst; unrequited love; hurt; no comfort; Arthur centric; Mozart is a bit of an asshole (sorry); no pronouns specified for reader.

Notes: I was re-reading some random parts from Living no Matsunaga-san and decided to write something for Ikevamp based on a scene there. I just realized Ryou and Levi kinda look alike. He is so precious; I loved him way more than Matsunaga.

I also listened to “Adore You” by Harry Styles, and now I see the lyrics from a whole different perspective. And the title for the fic comes from the song.

It wasn’t fair.

You deserved so much better. You deserved to be treated like royalty, to be loved, to be taken care of. He had to ensure you were always smiling, always happy, never crying.

However, that’s not what happened.

Arthur could barely restrain himself seeing the tears streaming down your face. How many times has it been now? How many more are you gonna endure? He only made you cry. Mozart only made you cry.

The writer can’t remember when or why he fell for you; he only recalls losing his chance. He remembers talking to Theo, who encouraged him to take action quickly. With half of the mansion having developed feelings for you, he knew it was only a matter of time before someone else confessed.

He was gonna buy you flowers and a nice gift, confess, ask you out properly, and kiss you by the end of the date if he was lucky enough. But before he could finish his lunch to go to town, you and Mozart entered the dining room.

The scene still haunts him.

Your emotionally overwhelmed face, the bright smile, the flushed cheeks… your hand holding his arm, and he smiling at you. Cutlery fell from hands, drinks were spilled, and he’s pretty sure he heard Isaac gasp and stop breathing by his side. You happily announced you were together, and the romantic music everybody was listening to that morning suddenly made sense. You were so happy. He just congratulated you, along with everyone else, and tried to move on.

Way easier said than done.

He ended up confessing to you the first time he saw you in tears, going against all his principles of never hitting on a compromised person — much less one in such a vulnerable state! Yet, he did it. He poured his heart out, saying he loved and cherished you, that he would never make you cry. He would never choose his work over you, even if his work was so important to him.

Arthur apologized some time later; he didn’t want to give the impression he was trying to take advantage of your fragile moments. So, he waited for things to calm down and confessed again.

You kindly turned him down both times, and he accepted it with a sad smile and a broken heart. Your heart didn’t belong to him; it belonged to the musician. You loved Mozart, and Mozart loved you — despite not being good at showing it, apparently. He’d just have to deal with it and not bother you with this again.

However, there was so much he could take.

He is leaving the mansion when he sees you standing just outside the door, with a lost gaze, tears streaming down your face. He holds you by the shoulders before he thinks better of his actions, but you don’t seem to mind it. You look at him with the saddest expression he’s ever seen on your face, and he knows.

He doesn’t ask what happened; he doesn’t have to. He simply turns you around and guides you by the shoulders back inside the mansion. He takes you to your room and sits you on your bed, observing how you quietly comply.

“I’ll be right back, okay, luv?” he speaks softly, and you just nod once, your gaze lingering on the floor.

He goes to the kitchen, prepares your favorite tea, and brews some coffee for himself. He considers getting something for you to eat too, but you probably don't want to. He arranges two mugs on the tray and returns to your room. You're in the exact same spot and in the exact same state as he left you, and it hurts him to see you so... numb.

He places the tray on your nightstand and goes to your en suite to grab a towel. Sitting down beside you, he reaches for your face, placing his finger under your chin and lifting it slightly to get a better look at you. Silently, he gently passes the towel over your wet cheeks.

"Try to warm up a little now, won’t you?” He offers you the tea, closing your hands around the mug and holding them in place with his own for a moment longer. “It’s your favorite.”

You just nod again, not really in the mood for talking — and you’re not even sure you’ll be able to say something without crying again. He grabs his mug, and you two drink silently, appreciating your own beverages.

"You… won’t ask?" you inquire after some time. Your voice is so low that he thinks he wouldn’t hear you if he weren’t a vampire with great hearing. It cracks another part of his heart open.

Arthur shakes his head and takes your empty mug back, putting it on the tray with his. “I don’t have to,” he says softly.

He wants to, though. A dark part of him would like to hear you dissing Mozart; perhaps you’d realize that he could be better than the musician — he would certainly try to.

Mozart went out early and hasn’t come back yet, probably too busy with the new concert he is working on. Usually, Arthur would find his hard work relatable; he got too invested in his writing too, losing night after night of sleep sometimes. However, it was your birthday today. Your lover set a birthday date with you and left you standing outside the mansion because of work.

“I wouldn’t do it,” he blurts out in a whisper, completing his thoughts aloud. “If you chose me, I’d never make you cry.”

“Arthur…”

“I want to make you happy. I need you to be.” He reaches for you, cradling your face with a gentle touch. He smiles, but it’s sad and broken, and it doesn’t reach his sorrowful gaze. “You don’t have to love me back… But I love you so much, I can’t take it anymore.”

You’re taken aback. Your breath catches in your throat, your tears drying almost instantly, and a cold shock passes through your whole body. After two confessions, you thought you’d be used to him professing his love. But this… This is so much more. You’ve never seen him this vulnerable before. You can practically see him offering his heart on his hands for you.

“What…” you attempt to speak, but your words falter, lost in the whirlwind of emotions.

Only then does Arthur realize what he just said, widening his eyes. He lets his hands fall limp into his lap, sighing and averting his gaze while mentally cursing himself. He was supposed to be smart, so why does he often act like a fool in front of you? Love really messes with one’s mind.

He closes his eyes and runs his hand through his hair, obviously nervous. He grasps his bangs, tightening his grip in an attempt to stop himself from being an idiot and start acting like a proper man.

“Sorry. This burden is the last thing you need right now,” he mutters, his voice the weakest you’ve ever heard from him. Arthur takes a deep breath and stands up. “But if you… If you need something, you can always call me.” He takes the empty tray and heads to the door, but then he seems to remember something and turns back to you again, forcing a better smile. “Happy birthday, by the way.”

His expression falters the moment he closes the door behind him. Arthur heads straight to his own bedroom, not even bothering to bring the tray to the kitchen; he can do it later. Right now, he just needs to lie down and hope the earth swallows him whole before he embarrasses himself again.

He needs to stop it, he knows that. How is he supposed to control his heart, though? He tried to drown this feeling with different people in town, but he always ended up not wanting to spend the night with them. They weren’t you.

He places the tray on his coffee table and flops down on his bed, covering his eyes with his arm. He feels his blazer getting wet just a few seconds later and lets out a shaky sigh.

It’s going to be another long, lonely evening.

Masterlists

#I'm sorry but I'm also not so sorry #I still love Mozart he didn't do this just to be mean #I'll write something to make it up to him later #and for Arthur too he deserves only love :')#ikemen vampire #ikevamp fanfics #ikevamp #ikevamp arthur #ikevamp mozart #ikevamp x reader #ikemen vampire x reader #ikevamp arthur x reader

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lavampira · 10 days

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book recommendations

tysm @winedark and @rosenfey for the tag <:

passing it along to @hythlodaes @scionshtola @coldshrugs @likeabirdinflight @lesbianalicent @veeples @narrativefoiltrope @kirnet @disequilibria @jennystahl @elvves @queenofthieves @weird-ecologies @erielake @verbose-vespertine @solarisrenbeth @onceinabluemoony @queerbrujas @oldblood but ofc no pressure!!

1. the last book I read:

GOTH WESTERN by LIVALI WYLE — well. technically, it’s an indie graphic novel. but it’s a western meets magical realism about necromancy, revenge, and the power of love. and lesbians. I burned through it in a couple hours sitting because I was so gripped by it tbh.

2. a book I recommend:

THE HACIENDA by ISABEL CAÑAS — an absolute all time fave book in my heart; I would say one doesn’t even need to necessarily love horror to get invested in this one, since it also involves very interesting critique of spanish colonialism, religion, and class struggles in post-independence mexico only using hauntings as the lens to view it.

3. a book that I couldn’t put down:

THE PRIORY OF THE ORANGE TREE by SAMANTHA SHANNON — I was glued to this book for a solid two weeks despite its length. I have a lot that I would change about the pacing and certain events or qualities of some characters’ outcomes, but it was such a fun fantasy read, and I had a difficult time even moving on from the setting and protagonists once I was done.

4. a book I’ve read twice (or more):

THE SONG OF ACHILLES by MADELINE MILLER — my first time reading this myth retelling was my freshman year of college, so I reread it again ten years later to see if it would still hold up for how much I loved it, and it absolutely did. the perspective of the man standing beside and in love with the hero interwoven with the tragedy of achilles and patroclus takes me right out and the passages that tumblr enjoys to quote from it have so much more impact in the full context of the narrative.

5. a book on my TBR:

OUR WIVES UNDER THE SEA by JULIA ARMFIELD — this poor book keeps getting knocked down on my TBR but I’m determined to read it this year. I’m intrigued by the horror of the protagonist’s wife ‘coming back wrong’ in a sense, and the recommendations based on its similarity to ANNIHILATION, but also the fact it seems to be a wlw scifi horror, too.

6. a book I’ve put down:

AFFINITY by SARAH WATERS — I wanted to like this one so bad, considering how often waters has been hyped up to me as The Author for historical lesbian novels and the fact it delves into victorian spiritualism, but the pacing felt so slow at getting to the point in the plot, and when it finally did, the twist put me off on finishing the end. it’s probably more of a case of ‘it’s not you, it’s me’ but I def had to DNF it.

7. a book on my wishlist:

GHOST STATION by S.A. BARNES — space horror quickly became a fave niche genre that I got into last year, so I’ve been very excited for this release, too. I’m also a fan of how barnes writes atmospheric dread and I have high expectations for it.

8. a favorite book from my childhood:

WUTHERING HEIGHTS by EMILY BRONTË — it altered my brain chemistry as a teenager in high school and I haven’t been the same since I read it. I distinctly remember listening to ‘you said I killed you — haunt me then!’ read aloud and having to pretend like it didn’t make me feel so completely unhinged in the middle of class.

9. a book you would give to a friend:

PIRANESI by SUSANNA CLARKE — I was recommended this one by a friend to begin with, so it feels like an even more perfect book to pass forward. I think it’s one of those books that’s easy to get absorbed into even if it’s not a typical genre one would read, and it’s such a life-altering experience to go through with the protagonist, too. the underlying message that we’re all changed by our own trials and we’re never the same as we were before lingers with me.

10. a book of poetry or lyrics you own:

CRUSH by RICHARD SIKEN — it’s taken me so long to finally track down a physical copy at my bookstore but it was worth it because it remains my fave book of poetry to date. I could quote so many lines, after how hard they’ve hit me, and some of them have influenced my own writing or pairings in some ways.

11. a nonfiction book you own:

HAVANA NOCTURNE by T.J. ENGLISH — back in 2015-2016ish I went through a true crime phase in the prohibition era through the foundation of the US mafia, and this is a very informative book on how the mob became tied to cuba and how the revolution affected it.

12. what are you currently reading:

AN EDUCATION IN MALICE by S.T. GIBSON — I stumbled across this retelling of carmilla set in a late 60s massachusetts women’s college after reading gibson’s A DOWRY OF BLOOD and had to give it a try. I’m enjoying it so far; the prose is full of thick emotional yearning and electric chemistry, and the balance in the narrative of toxic mentorship, historical romantic and sensual attraction between women without shaming them for it, and vampiric elements is really fun.

13. what are you planning on reading next:

WHAT FEASTS AT NIGHT by T. KINGFISHER — I only found out the other day that the sequel to WHAT MOVES THE DEAD was even released but I’m so desperate for the next part of alex easton’s story (and how eerily kingfisher writes horror) that it shot up to my next read.

#childhood is a stretch but i only read like. where the red fern grows. as an actual smaller child #and honestly? who let me do that? i sobbed for weeks i can’t consider it a fave after how bad it shattered little dani’s soul #dani.txt #tag game

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ahonice · 11 months

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right where you left me

luke hughes x fem reader

word count: 1.6k

warnings: angst, cursing, reader is a sad little bitch.

note: another song fic smh, i don’t like this one very much but i just needed to write something.

italics are song lyrics

+++

friends break up, friends get married. strangers get born, strangers get buried. trends change, rumors fly through new skies, but i’m right where you left me.

you met luke the night you moved into your college dorm freshman year, your parents were unable to stay to take you out to dinner so they gave you thirty dollars to go to a local diner. so there you were, having the most depressing meal of your life, when a boy slid into the seat across from you.

“you look really sad.”

“thank you.”

he laughed before apologizing, “i don’t mean it to be rude, but is everything okay? this is the saddest i’ve ever seen someone with a milkshake in front of them.”

“yea i’m okay, just moved into my dorm today and my parents weren't able to stay for dinner. i guess i just miss them.” you looked up from your untouched plate of chicken fingers to see who exactly was talking to you.

“oh i get that, i moved in a couple days ago. the first night is definitely the hardest.” he offered you a smile and stuck his hand out, “i’m luke.”

“y/n.”

matches burn after the other. pages turn and stick to each other. wages earned and lessons learned, but i’m right where you left me.

you found yourself at that diner a lot, going there to do your homework late at night when your roommate needed the lights off, going there whenever you were sad or just needed time to yourself, as well as going there whenever you and your boyfriend had a date night. it wasn’t the only restaurant you and luke ate at, but it was the most common one.

your relationship with luke was great, you were happy, he was happy, everyone around you was happy. that’s why you were blindsided when luke suggested you take a break during your weekly date nights.

“i just think that’s what is best for me, and for us, going forward. i need to focus on my rookie season in the nhl, i can’t have any distractions.” hearing luke refer to you as a distraction hurt, everything about what he was saying hurt.

“okay.” you didn’t want to agree, you wanted to fight him on it.

“once next season is over, then we can get back together, reevaluate everything.”

“okay.” one year, one year without him seemed impossible to you, but you needed to let this happen, this would only strengthen your relationship. luke would soon see what a life without you was and all you could do was hope he didn’t like it. this was the last thing you wanted, but you didn’t need him resenting you for any issues that could possibly come up during his rookie season that could easily be tied back to “he has a girlfriend, he is distracted, he isn’t putting hockey first”.

help i’m still at the restaurant, still sitting in the corner i haunt. cross legged in the dim light, they say what a sad sight. i swear, you could hear a hair pin drop, right when i felt the moment stop, glass shattered on the white cloth, everybody moved on, i stayed there, dust collected on my pinned up hair. they expected me to find somewhere, some perspective, but i sat and stared right where you left me.

your visits to the diner became more frequent after luke moved to new jersey, you were there the second your classes were finished for the day and you didn’t leave until the early hours in the morning.

you were used to it, the pity glances from the other customers when your tears began to spill, the sad smiles from the waitresses that had become all too familiar to you, the text messages from your friends and luke’s teammates checking up on you. nobody seemed to understand why you guys were broken up, but all you could respond with when they asked was “we aren’t broken up, we’re on a break.”

did you ever hear about the girl who got frozen? time went on for everybody else, she won’t know it. she’s still twenty three, inside her fantasy how it was supposed to be. did you hear about the girl who lives in delusion? breakups happen everyday you don’t have to lose it. she’s still twenty three, inside her fantasy.

you were in the diner, in that same booth where two of the three lightbulbs that hung from the ceiling were burnt out, more often than you were on campus. after summer break, once you had begun your junior year of college, you tried to avoid the diner with all that you had in you. your roommates telling you it does no good, it will only harm you to be in a place you once associated with happiness that now brings you nothing close to the fact.

you snuck out of your house at two in the morning after three weeks of being back in ann arbor, hiding your weakness from those you shared walls with, ashamed of yourself as you stood in front of the double doors, the left one still stuck after two years of you coming here.

you scanned the diner, seeing a couple familiar faces, giving them a fake smile before you made your way into the back corner. a false flash of hope struck you as you saw the back of a boy's head in the booth you could call home, but it wasn’t luke, you knew it wasn’t. you quietly made your way over to the booth, tears in your eyes, and got the attention of the boy in the seat luke once claimed as his.

“can i sit here? i won’t bother you, i just need to sit here.”

you’re sitting in front of me, at the restaurant, when i was still the one you want. cross legend in the dim light, everything was just right. i could feel the mascara run, you told me that you met someone. glass shattered on the white cloth, everybody moved on.

luke’s rookie season had officially ended with the devils being taken out of the playoffs in the first round, leaving him to head back to michigan while you were still in it. the school year was ending in two weeks and you were studying for your finals when your phone lit up.

from: luke

hey, i’m at the diner. we need to talk.

you could hear your heartbeat in your ears as you abandoned all of your materials and ran towards your car. you went fifteen over while driving to the diner, rolling through a few too many stop signs as well, but you made it and quickly went inside. you smiled as you saw the familiar back profile of your boyfriend sitting in your booth.

“hey luke.” you smiled, sitting down across from him.

“i met someone else.” your smile fell just as fast as your heart broke. in the time that luke was trying to figure out his career, life on his own, trying to be the best that he could be without any form of distraction, he met someone else. “-and i’m sorry. i didn’t mean for it to happen, it just did.”

you scoffed, your sadness quickly turned into anger. “how long?”

“i met her the night of my first game.” it was like the wind had been knocked out of you, that was only six days after you had agreed to go on a break, it took him six days to decide that you were not what he wanted, but what really made you angry was how long it took him to tell you.

“luke that was over a year ago, why did you not tell me sooner?” the tears in your eyes threatened to spill, but you wouldn’t let them, at least not in front of him.

your question was met with silence, the tension in the air was so thick it was choking you.

“this whole time you were with another girl? while i was pathetically sitting around, waiting for you, because i really thought that we were doing this whole thing so you could test the waters of your life in the nhl, but really you wanted to test the waters of your life without me.” you quickly stood up, cutting luke off before he could even try to speak. “goodbye luke.”

help, i’m still at the restaurant. still sitting in the corner i haunt. cross legend in the dim light they say what a sad sight. i stayed there. dust collected on my pinned up hair. i’m sure you’ve got a wife out there. kids and christmas, but i’m unaware. cause i’m right where i cause no harm. mind my business, if our loved died young, i can’t bear no witness and it's been so long.

you had just graduated and you decided to spend your last night in ann arbor in the diner, but this time you had company. your parents, friends, and boyfriend william. william was the boy who was sitting in luke’s seat that one night during your junior year, a friendship had blossomed after you that depressing night. it was never anything romantic, until you and luke officially broke up because you had the common decency that luke apparently lacked. tonight was unlike any night you had spent in the diners in the years before, you were happy, you were sitting in that same booth with all three lightbulbs lit, you could see other patrons and the waitresses and for once they weren’t looking at you with pity.

i’m right where, you left me.

+++

note: lol i actually hate this but i needed to write something i haven't in weeks (because i have zero inspo lmao i need help) but anyways enjoy, leave feedback, tell me if you loved it if you hated it, anything. love y’all babes!! have a great day <3

#ahonice writes #luke hughes #luke hughes imagine #luke hughes x reader #new jersey devils #nhl imagine

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taylortruther · 3 months

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I want the entire cardigan demo explained. I still don’t think she had the characters of james, august, and betty in mind when she wrote the song, especially since it’s the first one she worked on with aaron. I’ve always believed that story came later when she and joe wrote betty together, and she changed certain parts of cardigan and august to create a cohesive narrative. ‘Peter leaving Wendy’ and ‘Peter losing Wendy’ are two very different lines, and it makes me think she changed the lyric to the latter to make it fit into the love triangle where betty is more mature than james. ‘I knew I’d wish you would’ve changed your mind?’ ‘I knew you’d haunt all of my what-ifs?’ the original lyrics make it sound like he didn’t want to be with her/changed the ending where they stay together or perhaps where wendy outgrows him by cheating and leaving. saying she knew all of this makes it sound like she’s already experienced all of those emotions upon reflection, and they got back together. she’s imagining what she might think about this situation years down the road as she looks back on how they ultimately couldn’t stay away from each other. ‘I knew you’d miss me once the moment died’ seems to imply he left to be with someone else but realized he’d actually lost ‘the one.’ all of these lyrics add context to ‘your faithless love’s the only hoax I believe in’ and ‘what you did was just as dark.’ granted, I’m not even necessarily saying all of this happened in 2019-20. maybe she was looking back on when they first fell in love. but idk, I feel like we’re missing some information about something major that she felt the need to write about but couldn’t address directly without creating some sort of narrative around it. I guess the main thing that gives me pause is that we SAW them so often in 2018-19, but that logic is so flawed? you don’t actually know what’s going on in their lives even if you make educated guesses. they were insanely private after all. idk idk. thonking

i would really love a deep dive from her for these reasons too! the perspective from which betty is writing is REALLY interesting. like, yeah, why is she reflecting on a teenage moment as an adult? did it happen again? her grieving sounds so PRESENT, not just reflective.

also thank you for thonking as usual.

#cardigan #maria big brain

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zukosdualdao · 19 days

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i promise i'll do better (i will soften every edge)

zutara month, day 11: "mom and dad are fighting again", @zutaramonth

summary: kya interrupts an argument between katara and zuko.

warnings: reference to (implied) abuse/domestic violence, wrt to ozai's treatment of ursa.

other notes: lyrics from 'light' by sleeping at last. don't ask me how timelines work idk. yes there is a zutara daughter named kya here (separate entity from the lok kya.) she wears her hair in a southern water tribe braid and zuko calls her firecracker and it’s very cute. not really relevant but in this story i’m imagining she’s a nonbender.

“Katara, you know I agree with you.”

Across from him, she crosses her arms, and Zuko sighs. The throne room is empty, save for the two of them, and Zuko feels trapped, claustrophobic in the walls. They’ve made a point of opening up windows in the castle, letting light filter in, getting rid of old, haunting portraits, and making something new and beautiful together.

But the throne room doesn’t have windows to open. On a day like today, at times like these, it’s all too easy to remember the staunchly severe figures both his grandfather and father made here, walling themselves as they did behind high, towering fires.

Maybe they shouldn’t be having this talk here. It's too late now, but something to note for the future.

“It doesn’t seem like it.”

“Of course I want to increase reparations soon,” he insists. “That’s the plan, and that’s always been the plan. But we have to be smart about this,” he tries to remind her. “We can’t do it all at once, or people will try to block—”

“Oh, so now you’re all about thinking things through! Those instincts could have served you well years ago, you know.”

Zuko closes his eyes and runs a hand through his hair. The words are biting, but it’s nothing he can’t handle. Things have been tense again in the Fire Nation lately. Better than ever before in some ways. Worse in others.

The first years after the war were a turbulent time in the Fire Nation—riots from those not happy with the changing of the old guard, strikes from workers contesting the need to pay reparations to the other nations, whispers of loyalists to the old regime plotting to get either Ozai or Azula back on the throne. A few assassination attempts, all handled efficiently but reason enough for concern.

Ten years past the end of the war, though, and things have started to stabilize. The plan has always been to increase reparations once the Fire Nation’s economy has improved, and Zuko intends to keep his word. But part of the system he’s trying to build means that there are representatives from all over the Fire Nation, as well as the other nations, and they each have their own agendas. It’s a tricky thing to navigate; he has to take all of their concerns seriously, of course, but also act according to his own principles. To live up to the promises he made years ago, and that he’ll continue to make for years to come.

Katara looks at him with a combative raise of her eyebrow.

It’s taken a strain on their relationship. It doesn’t happen often, but when it does, they’re both a little too good at lashing out, both a little too good at saying the thing that will hurt, even if they immediately regret it.

But usually, by the end of the day if not before, they can remember they’re on the same side, for all that their perspectives might differ.

“Can we pause?” Zuko asks of her, and her features soften. “Just—try to hear each other out? Katara, I understand…” but before he can finish, the large door to the throne room creaks, and Zuko watches as one of the serving maids guides their daughter into the room.

“See?” Kya points to them, eyes wide with alarm and lip quivering. “Mom and Dad are fighting again.”

Something in Zuko’s stomach drops. He doesn’t want her to worry about this. About them. He’d had to worry about his parents, to worry about his mother, Ozai looming over her, and sometimes Zuko was pretty sure he saw fear in her eyes where there should have been love, and then—

She’d been gone. And he’d drawn his own conclusions, quietly and with little reason to question them.

“She coudn’t sleep,” Hina says apologetically, and Zuko only waves a hand. “She was asking for you both.”

“Thank you for bringing her.”

“Oh, sweetie, don’t worry,” Katara says, walking over and lifting Kya up onto her hip. “Things are just tense right now,” she says, with a guilty sideways look to Zuko, who smiles weakly. “It’s not anything for you to worry about.”

“Promise?”

Zuko walks over to join the huddle and places a kiss atop her dark hair, which is twisted in a braid. “Promise, little firecracker. Mom and Dad are just trying to figure out the right way to handle something.” He meets Katara’s eyes and tries to impress the sincerity of his words on her. “But we will figure it out. We always do.”

Katara smiles at him and uses the hand not keeping Kya secure on her hip to touch the small of Zuko’s back in a gentle gesture. The three of them stand huddled together, and for the first time in… weeks, probably, Zuko feels his body relax, just a little.

He smiles back, a little exhausted but a lot relieved—to have Katara with him, there to both challenge and support him, to have Kya with them, creative and funny and quick as a whip as she is, and at only age four. He’s glad to have his family.

They are okay. Right now, they are okay. Whatever else may come.

#zutaramonth2024 #zutara month #zutaramonth #zutara #my fic #day 11: “mom and dad are fighting again”#trigger: abuse.#trigger: domestic violence.#jic. small references.#atla

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unloneliest · 8 months

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im so fucking good at making sexy little leverage aus and then never writing them. this is my ma spencer au, which has been lifted directly from my twitter with minimal editing, & which i am haunted by always.

ok so the au. this is going to be very long. every time i listen to spent gladiator 2 by tmg i think abt the leverage team/eliot specifically.

lyrics for context:

so i was thinking abt an au where eliot was never on the team, bc like. eliot fully got Out of the game, but interacts w them on an early case and ends up falling in with them anyways? BUT i also think a lot about how hard it'd be for any of them to retire bc there's people who hate them who know their faces, yknow? so how WOULD eliot be able to have retired &what has to change for eliot to be that comfortable getting out?

so i figure he maybe got out of the moreau situation earlier. maybe he broke up with the horse girl but they stayed on good terms, and maybe he never did the worst things he ever did for moreau because he had his Getting Out Of There chef connection moment sooner.

but that doesn't undo how recognizable eliot would be to various parties and i was like. well then. what if the chef who was that pivotal person for eliot was a trans woman and was as pivotal with eliot being gendery as she was with eliot retiring?

so like. early 2000s nonbinary/transfeminine he/she eliot spencer finding a few small towns to live in pretty at random but having a home in each one and cycling through them with no discernable pattern?? and being a loved part of the local queer community in all of them?

it's similar to my "eliot never left home and is luke gilmore girls but also co-created a queer bar in his town" au (aside: thank you @lycanqueer for pointing out that connection ages ago, i have been unwell about it ever since).

like . eliot!!!!! eliot probably first connecting with the team bc of the two horse job and slowly begrudgingly helping, joining in on the tap out job, etc.

eliot being like a parent figure to various queer kids in the different towns and they call him "ma spencer" and she wears his practical boots with flannels still but maybe they're with a more feminine tank top and maybe you're as likely to see ma spencer in a no nonsense knee length skirt as a sturdy pair of jeans. and maybe sometimes he braids her hair . and she's mr. spencer too and well respected by the folks of whatever town he's staying in, too stubborn and helpful and intimidating not to be!

eliot being openly down for a casual relationship both with parker and hardison from when she first gets to know them onward—and him keeping his past quiet still, but it getting harder to keep the parts of her life seperate as he finds herself getting closer with the team & with more serious feelings for parker and hardison.

maybe the team's hitter is Tara? i feel like she's capable of that? but she has to be the grifter when sophie goes on her break and eliot joins in "Just Once" but it ends up being more than that.

eliot would have a lot of complicated feelings abt joining in—like, both being happy with the peace she found & not wanting to risk that but still feeling like he needs to pay penance and that this is a way to do that.

and then season 3 hits completely different. i think this eliot would talk about his past once she found out they were targeting moreau, but i think team dynamics would overall be super different in general. the team would be way less of a unit with nate than when you see things from his perspective—espeicially without eliot always there to insulate the team from the worst of him.

anyways im gonna be thinking about this for the next 800 years. will i ever write this fic? probably no. but ma spencer is so real to me

#leverage #eliot spencer #eliot #leverage ot3 #jam posts #leverage posting #shoutout to skip and rowan for probably having seen this on twitter #writing this up i realized my eliot's queer bar au only lives there also #ma spencer au #ma spencer

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omegasmileyface · 6 months

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YIPPEE I FINISHED MY FIRST SONG!!! its not perfect but it is in fact a song!!! :DDDDDD

this is my art for @ecto-implosion 2023! thats a Danny Phantom reverse big bang, which means it was an event where artists would work on an art piece, a fanfiction author would partner up with them and make a fic based off of it, and then everyone would release everything in a short time period— this song is intended to be listenable even if you don't know anything about the show, but it is a fansong from the perspective of Penelope Spectra singing to/about Vlad Masters :3

my partner was @nanaarchy, who made THIS KICK-ASS COMPANION FIC PLEASE READ IT THERES SO MUCH ATTENTION TO DETAIL OH MY GOD!!

and thank you @krzysztofpikes for being a HUUUUUUUGE help with the software and the chords and the mixing and overall just helping me do this thing that i had no idea how to do whatsoever

if you'd like to download the song, you can do that here (srry i didnt upload it to spotify or bandcamp or anything lol), and here's the youtube upload! also, the lyrics are below the cut!

youtube

Do you feel that desperation hiding underneath your skin? Do you feel the way that loneliness burns? Do you recognize your actions always stemmed from within? Have you figured out to live and to learn? Do you still fear the sight of needles and the beeping of machines? Still assume people pawns by default? Do you smell that sweet ambrosia hiding underneath your skin? Well, the good thing is it's all your fault The first part of healing is admitting that you're sick and I can almost taste it in the way you move your lips You haven't thought of therapy since when you were a kid That changes now! While I'm here, congratulations on the magazines and house every girl in town lined up but one And what a beautiful blue bedroom, such a shame it's untouched I would bet you'd raise the perfect son Everything somebody could want unless that somebody was you Here you are, still haunted after dawn I bet even if I put him right in front of you, you couldn't rid the world of that pollution show your old friend absolution I'm sure you've noticed by now trauma gave you your start You wouldn't be here if you'd never gotten torn apart Go tell your enemies you're thankful that your heart was eaten by the Green-Eyed Monster! The first part of healing is admitting that you're sick and I can almost taste it in the way you move your lips You haven't thought of therapy since when you were a kid Let me just go ahead and change that now... The first part of grieving is admitting that you're dead so move yourself on over, wrap my teeth around your neck You hadn't thought of therapy 'til I got in your head That's my world now! All these lectures about power... and when were you going to use it? Hmm. That's what I thought.

#danny phantom #ectoimplosion2023 #musicians on tumblr #my music #penelope spectra #vlad masters #music #i am Asleep as this poasts :) hi

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mockingjaysnakes · 2 months

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Olivia Rodrigo in interviews about writing "Can't Catch Me Now", from Lucy Gray Baird's perspective:

"It was a wonderful experience to try to write something from the character of Lucy Gray".

Lucy Gray is a character she feels very connected to.

"So while it was very much about Lucy Gray, i think i injected parts of myself into it too. I saw bits of myself in her; i admired her resilience, so i tried to embody all that and put it into the song".

With the song, Lucy Gray became the muse.

Francis Lawrence talking to Olivia about the song: "I remember I sort of talked at her for 45 minutes". “About the movie and about the themes and about the ending, and the mystery at the end, and how I thought the song should feel in terms of being a little haunting, and what it could do for us narratively with lyrics. She took a bunch of notes."

"Can't Catch Me Now" is just as haunting and mesmerizing as Lawrence wished: a crooned epilogue for Lucy Gray's story.

His inspiration: "one of the last scenes was very inspiring to me. It's an overhead shot of a bunch of birds in the trees, and something very important just happened, that was playing in a loop in my head over and over, and I was like, i want to write a song that captures what that feeling is".

(Producer) Dan Nigro and Olivia wrote the Hunger Games theme song in a beautiful studio overlooking the ocean, something they actually rarely do. "But I like to think that any of the interesting qualities of that song come from where it was written."

In the scene that was inspired when she wrote the lyrics: "There's Blood on the Side of the Mountain": —"There's a scene in the movie where it's kind of a breaking point for Lucy's character and something changes dramatically. There's a touch headshot of all these trees and birds coming in and out. It was my favorite part of the movie because it shows her resilience and her fight against her defense. I love that feeling, so when I wrote the song I had that image in my head the whole time and I tried to capture it".

"I really wanted the song to be super dynamic, especially when it's for a movie like The Hunger Games, there's a lot of space for some drama. So I think the vocals added this lush soundscape that swells, pulls back and gives it these dynamics I was really into. Watching the movie, there's a lot of Appalachian folk songs that Lucy sings and I was really inspired by those songs; I think they're really incredible. So I think the second I watched it, I knew I wanted to make a song in that vein".

She started the writing process for “Can’t Catch Me Now” from scratch after watching the movie and collecting her thoughts.

She listened to a lot of Simon and Garfunkel, Carole King and Joni Mitchell while writing her album Guts and The Hunger Games Song.

"Especially with the Hunger Games song, it was very insular in the way I wrote it. Though I guess I went back and edited it a bunch; it was one of those songs where I worked on it, set it down for like a month, picked it back up. We definitely refined it for a while".

#tbosas #the ballad of songbirds and snakes #thg #the hunger games #olivia rodrigo #can't catch me now #songs #writing #francis lawrence #daniel nigro #lucy gray baird #rachel zegler #interviews #singer songwriter #celebs

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mylittlevsoldier · 1 month

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Byler, El and the folklore love triangle.

Taylor Swift’s 7th studio album, “folklore” (along with the sister album “evermore”) has written between the lines a love triangle between one teenage boy, James and two teenage girls, Betty and Augustine.

Taylor herself has said, “Betty and James end up together but he {James} put her {Betty} through it.”

However, the way byler and El tie into this is slightly different.

The way the folklore love triangle works is like this, James and Betty were together and had some sort of falling out. Then, James went away for a summer and cheated on Betty with Augustine. But, after that summer, James basically ends up ghosting Augustine because he realizes that he really messed up with Betty and needs to make things right. So, he shows up to a party she was having and the kiss and makeup and start dating again and “end up together.”

Now that you know what the folklore love triangle is, I can tell you how Byler and El fits into all of this.

How I think this works is Mike is James, Will is Betty and El is Augustine. And here is why.

James is obviously Mike because he is the one stuck between the two “girls”. The “girls” in this situation being Will and El. he can’t choose whether to be unhappy in his relationship or pursue the person he wants but hurt the girl he is with and put a target on his back.

Will being Betty just makes the most sense. Will has been there from the very start. Even though Mike and Will obviously never canonically dated, they’ve been best friends since kindergarten. Also, Mike and Will have had SEVERAL falling outs and the one that always crawls back to Will is Mike, begging him forgiveness.

Now time to talk about El. Please don't get me wrong, I LOVE El. Please do not think that I am one of those bylers that hate El.I don’t. However, El is Augustine. She has simply not been there as long as Will has been. She is basically just a distraction for Mike in a romantic sense. Hear me out, Mike is using El as a shield to hide behind. So he can hide from his internalized homophobia. I am NOT saying that he thinks of El as an object. But it’s more on head, he’s thinking that he can’t possibly java feelings for Will because he has a girlfriend. And if he has a girlfriend, he can't be picked on. He can’t be a target.

TIME FOR LYRIC ANALYSIS!!!

Cardigan

Cardigan is the song that tells Betty’s side of the story from her perspective. Which in this form is Will's side of the story from Will’s perspective.

“I knew you.”

Like I’ve said many many times Will has been there from the very beginning. Like, he was the first friend Mike ever had.

“A friend to all is a friend to none. Chase two girls, lose the one.”

I’m sure one of the many reasons Mike doesn’t want to break up with El and confess his feelings to Will is because he could and probably will lose both of them. Because if he breaks up with El, that’s already enough grounds for losing her not to mention the whole part about being in love with her brother. Mike could also loose Will because he could reject Mike for the sake of saving El’s feelings.

“And when I felt like I was an old cardigan under someone's bed, you put me on an said I was your favorite.”

Mike has always been the first one to notice when anything with Will is off, the first one to find him when he’s wandered off while in an episode. He has been “the only one who cares about Will” from the start.

“I knew you. Leaving like a father, running like water.”

We all know that Mike runs from all of his problems and won’t stop running until he falls off the face of the Earth. But Will doesn't know why he’s running from him.

“But I knew you’d linger like a tattooed kiss. I knew you’d haunt all of my what if’s.”

Will knows better than anyone that the feeling of Mike lingers. It stays and it won’t go anyway and it’s bittersweet.

“I knew you;d miss me once the thrill expired and you'd be standing in front of my front porch light.”

Whether Will liked it or not he knew that Mike would be coming back sooner rather than later. And he wanted that way. He didn’t want to push Mike away. It would be impossible to push away the person that he has called his best friend all his life and the boy that has been with his sister for years.

August

“‘Cause you were never mine.”

I don’t think that El is stupid, she has to know or have somewhat of a feeling. But also, I feel like she knows that Mike would be better off with Will. And, honestly, I think she’ll be better with someone else who actually listens to what she needs.

“I remember thinking I had you.”

I think that in retrospect, it’s funny to El all of the things she tolerated from Mike. And I think when Mike and El break up she will realize that they simply weren't right for each other in a romantic sense. Platonic with a capital P.

“So much for summer love and saying us”

I genuinely think that when El and Mike broke up in season 3, they should’ve stayed broken up. They would have still been friends and still talked to each other. But if they would have broken up it would have been the best for both of them. It would have saved both of their feelings.

Betty

“Betty, one time I was riding on my skateboard when I passed your house. It's like I couldn't breathe.”

I know for damn sure that Mike Wheeler could not go near that house after Will moved out. I feel like it would make him sick to his stomach when he looked at it.

“The worst thing that I ever did was what I did to you.”

I know that Mike regrets the shit he did in Season 3. The fights, the blatant ignoring of Will to focus on El and his relationship that’s falling apart in front his eyes.

“Slept next to her but, I dreamt of you all summer long.”

I think that Mike really started to realize that he likes Will around the end of season 2 and season 3. Which is also around the same time he starts getting more defensive towards Will. That's when it all starts going downhill. Because he is starting to realize this feeling and with El breaking up with him, he is losing things to hide behind.

“The only thing I wanna do is make it up to you.”

We all know that if season 2 Mike saw seasons 3 or 4 Mike, he would beat his ass. But I still think that there is a little part of Mike that still really cares about Will like season 2 Mike did.

This is a rework of something i did a really long time ago so if it seems familiar and you've been around my blog a while that's why!

people who wanted to be tagged:

@hollarious2

@artsyna

@wallywise

@lebylershipper

@ash-the-wise

@tender-emotional-music

@willbyerswatch

@hearteyes-wheeler

@paloma-ascends-into-hellfire

also! if you want to be on the normal tag list (aka you get tagged everytime i post an essay / longer post abput byler you will get tagged), please comment and let me know!

also watch out for something related to byler and folklore soon (wink wink)

#byler #mike wheeler #stanger things #spotify #will byers #byler endgame #byler is real #music #taylor swift #folklore #folklore love triangle #james #betty #august #byler analysis #lyric analysis

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spade-riddles · 1 month

Text

Submission: Death/Dying/Mortality & The Jack-O-Lantern of it all.

The first 🎃 was sent on May 13, 2023.

#4. 🎃 “Speaking of, I love Halloween, don’t you? I’m already counting the days until October.”

#11. 🎃 “Imagine this. It is 3 am and Halloween is over"

All Saints Day, while exact origins are uncertain, was originally most commonly celebrated in May (like, a LONG time ago. ~300-600 A.D). Specifically…MAY 13. The night before All Saints Day was called “All-Hallows Eve”, which is what we now know as Halloween. (I acknowledge that is through the Christianity lens, as I know there this is a holiday with pagan roots as well).

This is a celebration dedicated to remember the dead. I believe the use of the pumpkin/jack-o-lantern and the references to this celebration were easter eggs for the direction of TS11, before we even KNEW a new album was in the works. Furthermore, someone sent in a post identifying May 13 as the first documented date of JK & KK, which was also linked to the original spade riddles about MAY.

Now that it has been a few days since the release of TTPD, I’m shocked to see just how many references there are to the concept of death, dying, endings, resurrection, etc. Here is an incomplete list of all of the references to this theme throughout the TTPD rollout and release:

TN easter egg

“We hereby conduct this post-mortem” - AKA….after death. This was ultimately revealed to be lyrics from “How Did It End?”

Track 4 - Down Bad

“I might just die, it would make no difference.”

Track 5 - So Long, London

“My white knuckle dying grip holding tight to your quiet resentment.”

“I died on the altar waiting for the proof.”

Track 9 - Guilty As Sin

“One slip I’m falling back into the hedge maze, but what a way to die.”

Track 10 - Who’s Afraid of Little Old Me?

“If you wanted me dead you should’ve just said. Nothing makes me feel more alive.”

Track 12 - loml

“Are they second hand embarrassed that I can’t get out of bed, cause something counterfeits dead?”

“And I’ll still see it until I die, You’re the loss of my life.”

Track 14 - The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived

“Were you sent by someone who wanted me dead?”

“I would’ve died for your sins, Instead, I just died inside.”

Track 16 - Clara Bow

“I’m not trying to exaggerate but I think I might die if it happened, die if it happened to me”

Track 17 - The Black Dog

“Old habits die screaming.”

“Now I wanna sell my house and set fire to all my clothes, and hire a priest to come and exorcise my demons, Even if I die screaming, And I hope you hear it.”

Track 19 - The Albatross:

“She’s the death you chose”

Track 21 - How Did It End:

“We hereby conduct this post-mortem”

“Say it once again with feeling, How the death rattle breathing, Silenced as the soul was leaving, The deflation of our dreaming, Leaving me bereft and reeling. My beloved ghost and me, Sitting in a tree,D-Y-I-N-G”

Track 23 - I Hate It Here

“I dreamed about it in the dark, the night I felt like I might die”

Track 25 - I Look In People’s Windows

“I had died the tiniest death.”

And finally…resurrection (note: I am not a religious person, I’m writing about this from a literature/contextual perspective).

Track 9 - Guilty as Sin:

What if I roll the stone away? They’re gonna crucify me anyway. What if the way you hold me is actually what’s holy? If long suffering propriety is what they want from me, they don’t know how you’ve haunted me so stunningly. I choose you and me, religiously

propriety (noun) - 1: the quality or state of being proper or suitable, 2: conformity to what is socially acceptable in conduct or speech, fear or offending against conventional rules of behavior especially between the sexes.

🫚 - 2/5/2024

Frost untouched, Conformity wins fights.

This 🫚 message seems to convey the message that conforming to what what society and the media, her fans, etc expect of her and will tolerate from her, is the only way she could gain enough traction to move forward. But in Guilty as Sin, she finally asks the questions “what happens if I roll away the stone?” Rolling away the stone, in a biblical sense, would reveal an empty tomb. An empty tomb was EVIDENCE that Jesus had risen from the dead.

So my thought is, what does rolling away the stone mean for Taylor? What are the implications of her asking, “What if I just give them all the evidence revealing my truth? They are going to judge me no matter what, so I might as well. If they want me to suffer my entire life by conforming to societal standards, they don’t know how impossible of an ask that is.”In Summary, 🫚 & 🎃 have absolutely proven themselves credible in foreshadowing the themes of this album and overarching story. And I’m sure as we continue to decipher their messages, we are going to find so much more.

#submission #🎃#🫚#this is excellent work

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