i think part of why i never really tried drawing until i was literally stuck home in a pandemic was that in art class in school in 10th grade I went to my teacher with my painting and asked how I could get better at shading to which she replied: "Just think of the light coming from one side and then the shadow already draws itself"

bitch. not it doesnt

something about the erasure of platonic love in fandom bothers me. maybe its just that im aroace, maybe i just dont 'get' the differences between loving and being in love. but it bothers me.

one thing i love about sz/sz is the clear distinction of themes and the way both of them view each other and just mixing it all. I can enjoy my fair share of possessive zoro when it comes to zs but it's more about thinking about how his devotion towards the rest of the crew (pre relationship) fuels his feelings towards sanji and the need to make sure he knows how important he is for him, how he would follow him anywhere sanji wants. Zoro would do anything as long as it made sanji happy imo (it can totally turn a little bit weird, we are talking about ZOSAN of all people. Zoro would definitely say some insane shit like cutting his chest open and giving sanji his own heart in case he is hungry or something like that)

And don't get me started with sanji's need to make sure zoro feels loved all the time, not just with food, but through quality time (no matter how little it is, his free time would definitely be reserved for zoro) he would think his actions are his way of saying "i understand how lonely you must have felt" after kuina and his years as a pirate hunter which later on turns into a "i want to give you a piece of what zeff and the rest of the baratie staff gave me". Sanji would be SO sweet with zoro once in a established relationship, and zoro would feel a kind of love he never knew existed, and that realization alone is enough for him to bow to never let anything bad happen to sanji, not because he thinks sanji is weak but simply because its what he deserves. Seeing sanji happy makes zoro happier

Huntlow situationship gives me such intense brain termites you don't get it

i think my favorite inaccurate (imo obvs) fluffybird... like fanon dynamic is the one where duck is very forward and red just shuts him down consistently. like thats so so funny to me i love that.

inaccurate to me bc despite eeeverything red is the only one in that couple making moves first (WHICH IS INSANE TO ME DONT GET ME WRONG) and hes also strangely shy so nothing is happening ever.

I have a question: in the lights out au, did Wally ever attacked/snap at anyone for Barnabys arm? He seems like the violent type🤔

oh no! never! he's not the violent type At All - with aus, i like to adhere to canon as much as possible, and from what i can gather... Wally is quite the pacifist!

so in this au, he's occasionally violent, but only by Necessity. out of a need to protect his friends. he doesn't enjoy it in the least, and in the early stages of the timeline, he himself got hurt quite a bit due to his hesitance to fight back / inherently peaceful nature. it takes him many years to get to the point where he attacks perceived threats on sight. it doesn't come naturally to him, and he Never looks forward to it - even when he's used to it. he avoids conflict when he can & does his best to prevent it

sometimes i feel like i hate everyone

do you ever feel like people only like chick-fil-a so much because they're not supposed to

never forget El isn't just touchy feely as a random personality trait, she's spent most of her developmentally critical years horribly starved of touch and warmth and love :)

and every moment of physical comfort she receives is precious to her as an antidote to some specific moment in her past when she suffered the lack of it :) and you can also see the shadow of her traumas in the ways she thinks to give physical comfort :)

and also don't forget that her trauma didn't end with the lab :) when we first meet her her traumas are drawn from lab days but by later seasons it's clear some of the traumas guiding her behavior are just... the show :) such as the crushing pressure of everyone counting on her to find Will :)

and if I spend more than 2 seconds thinking about what any simple little moment of closeness/physical affection/comfort must mean to El I will start sobbing and never stop :)

somewhat related to my last post:

idk who's active on tiktok (i'm not but my friends are) do you remember the scar girl drama. the girl who would put makeup on her cheek and call it a scar and it made everyone weirdly upset

that's anne von blyssen. that's her. people cannot decide if she has a skin condition or if she went off the deep end during her time off from dressage showing and now she's trying to get her fame back. when pressed for details she just says she went to hell and then rediscovered herself. do you understand the drama videos on jortube i'm envisioning. do you

well. in case anyone is curious i managed to email my prof about switching me out of my seminar group today (had to write it up w my irl) (needed him to click send) and u know there's a lot more confidence in me when i have him there to read the reply But she Didn't Reply Yet so now i just have to open it myself if/when she does in the next day or so ? that or i go to campus tomorrow when i don't have class. which. to be fair, if you know me, is totally and completely something i will do

has anyone else gotten this problem where like. ive had my binder (spectrum) since spring last year and i never had any problems with it for months. i didnt have to size up because my dimensions were exactly one size in particular . i wear it every day but never more than 8-9 hours like is recommended (i put it on at the very last minute before leaving my house and take it off the moment i get home i cant do much better than that), i have a day a week where i dont wear it bc sports, and on weekends i often dont wear it at all apart from like a dinner outside . like just in general i only wear it to go out and not at home . so i'd say im pretty much following all the safety stuff ? but for the past month or so ive been getting rib pain . so i thought i just needed a break which was a good coincidence bc i had like 2-3 weeks at home where i wore it essentially like maybe once . and now im back in school except . it still hurts when i wear it for a while ? im so confused like i thought giving it a rest was what i needed and i thought 3 weeks would be ample time? and it's not like my ribs have . Expanded? i dont think ive gained any weight either so like . why would i need to move up a size. and its kind of a problem because a) getting a binder at all was a hassle without my parents knowing so getting a 2nd one owuld be . Complicated b) i really really hope i havent fucked up my ribs somehow bc idk how i'd explain that to my parents??

funniest shit in the world to me right now <3

I don't normally like posting MCYT stuff because the fandom both scares me and also tend to engage with it in a way I don't. Not hate or to yuck anyone's yum if that's your thing, it's just not normally how I engage with SMPs at least not the stuff from the dream influenced side.

But I will say as someone who's been watching Lizzie and Joel for basically as long as I've had a YouTube account, (they were both some of the first channels I ever subbed to and the original Shadowcraft was like the first every long form YouTube content I ever watched) and who has Joel screaming Lizzies name in terror shock and awe at the insanity of her antics as a deeper core memory than my mother's voice, the exchange with Grian in the the most recent episodes of secret life of:

"I thought you two were married"

"that doesn't mean we have to be nice to each other"

did make me cackle. They're dynamic is iconic and I love them both dearly

I love Ceren Nightchant but the thing that confuses me about him is that whenever I say "Ceren Nightchant" I don't know WHICH one I'm talking about. Like of course there is no other Ceren, but after the tutorial update he was the only character that got a personality upgrade so major it's as if Ceren WAS two completely different people. Like if someone came up to me and said "Actually his name is Schmeren and he's Ceren's younger brother they just typed in his name wrong during the update" that would actually be believable because of how DIFFERENT the personality shift was

AND THIS ISN'T A BAD THING in fact I think I actually like New "Anti Skeleton Pirate" Ceren Nightchant better than the old one IN REGARDS TO HIS NEW PERSONALITY!!! Like I will always have a special love for Old "Greetings :)" Ceren Nightchant but that's only because of Nostalgia and completely untrue facts about him I made up in my head. Unfortunately pre-update Ceren Nightchant doesn't have that much going for him in terms of how interesting he is in comparison to the new one where they gave us like a whole heaping plate of characterization and nuance to his character

With Malorn it's different because he actually has a backstory. Like he's Important to the lore. He doesn't have like any screentime but just his story ALONE is enough to spin off completely into new exciting territory; we don't NEED anything else to hook us in because Malorn already has a hook, his relationships with his fellow teachers and students + his status as a powerful Necromancer + Malistaire's legacy affecting him.

Meanwhile Ceren Nightchant was a blank slate. We know he was in Unicorn Way for some reason despite not living there, not being a trained guard in handling the Twilight Zone situation, he was Just There and I think that's the only One Single Thing that was interesting about him.

And even though that still technically is the case with the new Ceren, LOOK AT HOW HE IS NOW. He's a CLOWN, a kind, happy, ridiculously powerful and intelligent clown who has a weird intolerance for undead pillagers and seems to get along great with our character!!! That's not like, groundbreaking lore like with Malorn or even Duncan, but idk there's just something so fresh and funny and exciting about this new bouncy iteration of a character we've known nothing about for like the past 20 years

So like in terms of nostalgia and personal headcanons, Greetings Nightchant will always be special to me but in terms of like being an actual character with more of a role in the story and a fresher dynamic with the characters around him, SkeLeTaL pIrAtEs Nightchant will be no. 1 for me

hahaha apparently people I used to be friends with are spreading rumors that I'm "predatory toward trans men" sure hope this won't have any consequences!