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blueaetherr · 1 year

Text

just a thought

pairing: mason mount x fem!reader [she/her]

warning(s): none

summary: the one where the maid and man of honour talk about the future prospects regarding their relationship

author's note: last one for while 'cause of exams (as if i don't already post irregularly :/), but anyways, enjoy!

Managing the wedding of your friends was definitely a task, especially if it's your first time and you are just one or two people. And as the maid and man of honour, Y/N and Mason had to come to learn that over the last few days.

There was more to learn than anticipated by the pair. It wasn't simply just being paired together as a bridesmaid or groomsman or being the right-hand person for the bride and groom; there was so much to those roles. It was providing emotional support the night before, making sure the wedding wouldn't collapse last minute, advising the bridesmaids and the groomsmen to always act accordingly, being the adults amongst the adults and probably much more.

And when you put all of that together, it was, of course, exhausting and challenging for two people, taking more than enough voice and strength and tolerance. Being the voice of reason for those solvable problems, being the spontaneous therapist moments before the wedding ceremony—they weren't for the weak, one needed strength beyond the physical one to manage well.

But it was okay. 'Cause when it was all said and done—the pre-wedding celebrations, the downtime the night before, the mini breakdowns and moments of doubt before the ceremony—there was the wedding ceremony, and it was wonderful. The bride, the husband, the family and friends and the culture embedded into every last detail of the event, from the decorations to the attires worn by everyone. When you get a result like that, there was no reason to allow any negativity to persevere during a happy moment.

As the day passed quickly, so did the wedding celebrations, from the ceremony and the pictures all the way to the reception that continued well into the night; when Mason and Y/N were finally able to find one another again.

Sitting by the private beach, it was a mellow environment they were given—a nice sight to witness, one easy to picture even with your eyes close. Comfortable with their place in the sand, appropriately loud music from the venue further up to the beach, waves kindly sliding over and under one another, the laughter of kids playing close by the shore accompanied by older siblings acting as babysitters and vibrant and solace everywhere you chose to look.

Mason knocked his knee against her own. "How have you been?"

Upon arriving at the wedding destination, the bridesmaids and the groomsmen were immediately split so they hadn't had much time together. Of course, Mason and Y/N had been seeing each other through the days, passing one another during wedding rehearsals or while passing on messages for the newly-wed couple when they weren't allowed to see each other. Other than that, their reasons for seeing one another wasn't actually rooted in seeing one another; either it was out of coincidence or for the purpose of the wedding.

Y/N swayed her head as she sat up, humming. "How was my day?" She had to say the question out loud to think. All of her thoughts were still fixed to be centred around the bride and her needs. She hadn't really had the time to focus on her own self, to process her own state of mind. "It was... it was really good."

"Is that so?" A smirk began to form across Mason's face. "I'm hearing you ladies went crazy with the bachelorette party, and a certain someone went even crazier. I didn't get any names but I'm gonna assume—

Y/N shoved Mason into the sand, causing him to let a laugh. "And that's how it's gonna stay: an assumption."

Mason took in a deep breath as he sat up, still letting out some of his laughter. "You don't have to hide it, love. I know you well," he picked up the bridal bouquet from the sand, the ever one his girlfriend had caught a little under an hour ago. "I mean, c'mon. We all saw. I even recorded it if you don't remember."

"And I had fun with it, Mason."

"And you had fun with it, of course," he kissed her cheek before offering the bridal bouquet, "that's all that matters."

Without hesitation, Y/N took the bouquet in her hands. She attempted to appear nonchalant about it, trying to observe the flowers in an unbothered manner. Though as soon as they were fully in her grasp, she couldn't help but smile shyly as she let her eyes admire the bundle of flowers, twirling them between her hands in delight and excitement.

And that—her happiness—quickly became Mason's happiness. Not only for the flowers' positive impact on Y/N's mood but also it got Mason wondering and thinking about various things surrounding, well, him and Y/N.

"Does it ever get you thinking about certain things..." Mason played with the sand, "being a maid of honour and all?"

"Thinking about what?" Though as soon as she lifted her eyes, she noticed his eyes on the flowers and then it all came to her. That thing we called marriage. "Oh... about that?"

"Yeah, I guess," Mason shrugged. He wished he could've introduced the conversation a little better. 'Cause it was far too awkward and strained for a topic that required mature adults to be handled with fluency.

"I don't know... Like what?" Y/N, like her partner, was lost in the conversation; lost in what she should say, lost in what about the topic would be discussed, lost in where the conversation would be going 'cause really, it could go in almost any direction.

"Anything. I guess just anything about us in the future," Mason rubbed his palms against his shorts as he inhaled a long breath. "I always wonder, like, if we do stay together and persevere, what will things for us be like? Where will we live? How will our relationship change for the better or worse? How many kids will we—"

Y/N quickly raised her hand, placing it on Mason's shoulder. "Woah, woah, woah, relax there," she said with widened eyes. Suddenly, she was more in tune with the conversation than the last few minutes. "Maybe we're thinking a bit too far into the future."

"Yeah, that was a bit sudden." Mason let himself think for a moment, his eyes wondering on the young kids passing by. "Let me ask a better question: what would you like our wedding to be like?"

"Our wedding? I mean I don't know." And yet all the words would eventually come to her so easily, without much thought. "Something small and nice... like enough for family and friends, but not enough that everyone everyone gotta be there. Maybe somewhere close to home, a cosy picturesque location, you know? Just a place where we could also spend our honeymoon in peace, adventure small towns and villages, and maybe some historical places," Y/N leaned back in her place a bit, "But yeah... that's just me."

"That's the whole point, Y/N. It's your wedding," Mason chuckled as he pulled his girlfriend close to him, "You're supposed to do and have whatever you want."

"I know," she exhaled, too joining with the laughter, one they both found restoring and soothing. It wasn't enough to counter all the stress from the past week, but enough to relax into the conversation just a bit more. "I just didn't anticipate this conversation tonight." Y/N really didn't. After managing the wedding of her friends over the last few weeks, she hadn't really had much time to stop and wonder about her relationship's future and outlook. She turned to Mason and wondered, "What about you? It wouldn't just be my wedding."

"I don't really have anything in mind to be honest. Besides, if it ever comes to it, you know, getting married 'n all—which we will—it doesn't matter what we have or where we are. Luxurious wedding, getting eloped—the part where you say I do is more than enough for me."

Surrounded by vibrant colours and a lovely, mellow environment, the couple turned to one another and found themselves smiling galore at each other, exchanging a lack of words as they observed one another, heads tilted in wonder. In those gazes—in their eyes—there was admiration and happiness and affection that were all genuine and bracing to experience together.

In truth, there was this admiration and happiness and affection because there was a lot of conviction in their words towards the other. And considering their minds for the last few days have been racing for their friends' relationship, it was refreshing to talk about their own. On a day when nothing seemed to be about them, it was nice to dedicate a small moment to themselves.

#mason mount #mason mount imagines #mason mount oneshots #mason mount imagine #mason mount fluff #mason mount fanfic #mason mount fanfiction #mason mount x reader #mason mount x black!reader #black!reader #football imagines #football imagine #football fluff #football oneshot #football blurbs #football fanfiction

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sugar-omi · 2 months

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bro that teen pregnancy shit fucked me upppp 😭 I fr am in tears and rolling around my bed lol

my brain went on a tangent halfway thru the moms section I was like damn okay what if mc and cove just ran away huh then what

AND THEN I remembered they’ve already ran away before which is part of why mom is so worried about cove’s influence and hellooooo???? full circle moment 🫢 made myself gasp fr

ya u make me think so many thoughts on this one good lordddd

-🗑️

LOL AWW I DIDN'T THINK EVERYONE WOULD GET SO EMOTIONAL </3 AND LMAOOO I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU THOUGHT ABT RUNNING AWAY AGAIN, PLEASE IS THIS GONNA BE A TRADITION LOL anyway, well good morning!!!! here's more angst n food for thought🤭🤭

tags : Angst / Hurt/Comfort, headcanons, fem/afab reader, pregnancy

[part 1: "everyone finding out cove and MC got engaged because they're pregnant"]

his whole world stops. his ears feel like they've been stuffed with cotton and his world is spinning outta control.

now lets assume the rubber broke, just for, simplicity n lore sake.

it's not that he wasn't already worried about this happening, he had been worrying about this for weeks since you realized what happened.

but even then, he already had the fear of god in him about this happening. both because his mom and dad were on him about safe sex, but also because he has a lot of feelings about being an accident n child to teen parents... and he really didn't want to recreate that situation or put feelings like that onto another life, another human with complex emotions and many many thoughts. a human and life he's responsible for.

it shocks him so much, because he's very worried about repeating of his childhood on his child, and his kid feeling the same way he did/does.

he already knows that either way, the babe will probably have mixed feelings on being a accident, and essentially being a bump in road of his young parents lives

but it's also everything he had been worrying about, finally coming to fruition.

even though he's very, very stressed and scared for your futures, he's long since decided to make it work. he really wants to make it work. he wants to do the best by you, and the babe. and he wants to give his kid what he didn't have.

but anyway...

you're very worried about dropping the news on him

and i bought you aren't surprised at how pale cove gets when you drop the news...

and if he's not sitting down already, he is now. (he might just faint, like forreal this time too from the looks of it...)

he's very emotional, and super nervous, but what scares you is that he's very quiet...

when he does speak though, his first question is "what're.. what are you gonna do?"

because before he gets too emotional, he wants to know what you want first. you're carrying the baby and you're the one who'd go through all the changes, and you're the one who has the most intense feelings and being pregnant makes your emotions n hormones even crazier and more intensified.

all that plus how young you two are? and all the plans you two had? yeah, it's a lot, and regardless of how he feels, he wants to do whatever you want and he'd understand if you decide not to keep it.

but if you say right then and there, you wanna keep it, cove says he'll take care of you, and the babe, comforts you and hugs you. then he says wants to get married..

or if you say you dont know... cove says you two will work through these emotions, and that no matter what, he'll take care of you, and the baby if you want it.

when you do eventually say you want to keep it, even if you say this a couple minutes after, or a few days after, cove comforts you again and promises you'll work through this, and that it'll be okay.

then he brings up getting married...

of course it's more emotional, and maybe even a bit romantic!

so imagine this, you're sitting on your bed, and you and cove are hugging each other, you're wrapped up in his arms and it's a great comfort.

you're both really emotional, and calming down after crying and having a moment.

cove pulls away, takes your hands in his and even with glassy, red eyes he has a determined expression. goes on about how much he loves you, and how much he treasures you, and that he's going to do his best for you, and take care of everything.

his speech probably draws you back to tears, even brings him to tears but he keeps going because he needs to tell you all this!!

"y/n... i want to marry you, i want us to be a family.. i know i don't have a ring and this isn't very romantic but.. will you marry me?"

doesn't matter if you say yes right away or if you ask him if he's sure he wants to get married, he reassures you he's not just doing this because he thinks it is what you and/or your or his family would want.

he wants to marry you anyway, why wait?

now about telling your parents.

regardless of if you have cove there while you tell them, or you do it alone, lets say cove finds out what your mom said about him being a bad influence.

i also think your moms are a bit icy with cove too, so even if he has to force out all the details of your conversation, he already knows your moms aren't happy

but to know your mom thought, maybe even thinks so still especially with the news, that he was/is a bad influence on you.

it makes him sad. because what if she, or even both your parents, thinks that cove is dragging your life down with marriage and a baby?

well, like i said in the first post, this totally opens up a new can of insecurities and doubts, and he kinda spirals into his own mind.

he even starts thinking about what if you regret marrying him, and/or having his baby. what if you decide you hate being a parent, or being married, or being a family all together?

what if this holds you back so much that you start to resent him. god he's so afraid of you resenting him.

and your moms being short with him doesn't make him feel better because now he just had a thought, what if your family hates him so much that they start talking to you about how much of a mess this is, and then you realize how they're right, and decide to leave him, or even worse, leave him and the baby?

it's all very irrational thoughts, and when he wakes up (after maybe 3 hours sleep), he realizes it is a bit.. ridiculous. just a bit. he knows you wouldn't abandon him so easily, and you certainly wouldn't be swayed by your family

but he also wouldn't blame you if you had, or have (now or in the future), any resentments. he just really wants it to work.

i think this is also the time when he realizes exactly how much his parents divorce fucked him up.

he very determined for you two to make it work as a family. not co-parents.

he wants to see his kid every day, he wants to see you everyday, he wants to celebrate every milestone as a family and he definitely doesn't want to fight with you like his parents did. and even more so doesn't want to make your kid hear or see all of it.

he doesn't wanna fight, and then you or him walk out for hours or days. doesn't wanna sleep in separate rooms, doesn't wanna sleep by the crib to comfort himself with the presence of his darling baby, or because you two fought, like his dad used to.

doesn't wanna have to explain why mommy* and daddy are fighting, or why they don't sleep in the same room, or why they aren't talking to each other, or why they aren't living together anymore.

definitely doesn't want to explain what divorce is and what that means for them.

(*just saying mommy for simplicity sake)

but he also doesn't want to repeat what his dad did, and take on all the burden by himself.

it's hard to find a balance too, because he's torn between working his ass off to provide and prove that he can do it, that you aren't making a mistake... and accepting help, or letting himself relax sometimes.

but i think wanting to be there for you during the pregnancy, forces him to leave his days more open.

of course he still works more than usual, but he also makes sure to carve out time to see you, and be there to comfort you or bring you food, flowers, or go on a date.

remember i mentioned therapy in the last post?

please encourage him to start it. because this is a very big transition in your lives, and you both want the best for yourselves and the baby, so lets do the work before they get here, okay?

fighting with his dad

now he definitely appreciates his parents concern, and their support and words of wisdom, all that stuff...

but when his dad says something like "you don't want to end up like me and your mom." or "you shouldn't mess up your future." or even if he insistently tells cove, "think about your future! y/n's future!"

cove gets upset, just because does that mean his dad is projecting onto him, and telling him that they're fucking up just like he and mom did? or is he telling him that he's dragging your future and his into the mud?

either way, that's what makes him say something mean, just like i said in the last post:

cove would probably end up saying something (a bit) hurtful like "i would never end up like you and mom." , "i would never marry MC if i didn't know it'd work. unlike some people, i'm not gonna make my kid listen to us argue and then try to play happy family." , or "trust me, my kid won't end up with a childhood like mine." / "trust me, my marriage won't end up like yours."

he definitely hangs up the call or walks away from his dad immediately afterward, shaking with anger and anxiety. he's so stressed. and he's worked up.

after the argument, there's only 2 places cove could go at this moment. to you, or to work.

and if he's at work, he's distracted, but tries to focus on his job. he's still mad at his dad, and he already feels like crying. he really didn't need his dad to doubt him.

he gets it. he gets it, he really really does. but he feels so fragile, that he'd really appreciate a little faith.

now if he's with you, which he'd probably run to you after work anyway just so he doesn't have to face his dad yet. he's like a big baby

he's holding you, arms around your waist and his head on your stomach or lap, or you're laying on your side and he has his hand on your belly, as if he's waiting for the baby to reach for his hand through your tummy.

when he tells you what happened, and why he's so somber, please run your fingers through his hair and just listen to him for a bit... eventually he'll start rambling about all the things he's been holding onto, including his fears about you resenting him

it'll probably be a long talk, but once you reassure him that you wanna make it work too, and that you know cove will be a good dad (and vice versa), and that your moms don't hate him, they're just... upset. and worked up about the turn of events.

and you talk about his dad too, and the argument, you both realize it comes from a place of concern.

he doesn't wanna see you two try to be a family and fail. he doesn't want you to make mistakes he did while raising cove...

conclusion, it's a very fruitful conversation. and cove goes back home, teary eyed and a bit like a lost puppy, and that night he doesn't find his dad waiting for him (cliff tries to work as late as possible, both because he wanted to give cove some space, but also because he has a bad habit of avoiding situations... so when he does get home, he spends the night in his room)

of course they can't avoid each other forever, and the next day cove actually makes the effort to find his dad during his lunch break to apologize.

he said something really hurtful, that i don't think cove could live with if he didn't apologize.

his dad definitely laughs when cove mentions that you said that cove should try therapy, and even if you don't say that his dad should consider it too, cove does say to his dad that a family therapist sounds like a good idea.

#olba #our life: beginnings & always #cove holden x reader #cove holden #angst #hurt/comfort

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chuuyasheaven · 1 year

Text

Request; @imalittlebitlovedrunk ->“can you do 10 + 15 w/ nikolai ?? , they/them pronouns please :)”

Prompt/Number; 10: “You taste fuckin’ sweet, y’know that?” / 15: “You look so good in this dress, you'll look better when i rip it off of you, angel.”

Summary; Nikolai stops you from having a night out with your friends! <3

Warnings; Dom!Nikolai, sub!afab!Reader (they/them), teasing, fingering, Petnames, smudged make up, dacryphilia, etc.

Notes (from me); This may be ooc!Nikolai so yea, Enjoy! 💖 (update: HOW DID I JUST NOW FIND OUT HOW TO DO THIS SMALL FONT??? IM SO DISAPOINTED IN MYSELF..)

“Hey, dove! Wanna do some-”, Nikolai stopped talking the second he saw you.

You were standing in front of a mirror, applying lipstick, in the most beautiful dress he’s ever seen.

I mean, how could a dress capture your waist so perfectly?

“Oh, what’s the occasion, dear?”, Nikolai asked while looking at you, waiting for your response.

“I’m going out with my friends, Kolya. I’ll probably be away for an hour or two.”, you said, fixing your hair before leaving the bedroom.

Nikolai just watched you leave, then he ran after you because he realized you were leaving. (He’s so silly 😋)

Just when you reached the door, Nikolai catches up to you.

As he was blocking the door, you looked with slight confusion.

“Kolya, could you please move? I’m gonna be late.”, “But, dove, i want a goodbye! You didn’t think i was gonna let you leave without giving me a kiss?”, you sighed as you kissed him quick on the lips.

“Come on! Give me a kiss filled with love!”, Nikolai pouted, you did as he pleased.

You kissed him, longer than last time. Nikolai didn’t let go, while you waited for him to.

When you tried, he pulled you back by your chin. You saw no other way of getting out, so you had no choice but to leave him be.

As deeper the kiss got, you cared less. Nikolai moved you both to corner you on the wall. Now his hand was moving down to grab your leg, Nikolai lifted it to level his waist.

Finally, you parted your lips, a string of saliva connected your lips.

Catching your breath, Nikolai smirked as he noticed that this kiss smudged your lipstick.

That’s when he went down on your collarbone, leaving lipstick stains.

“N-nikolai, i have to go-”, “Fuck your friends, darling. You should spend this night with me instead. Besides, you look pretty in this dress, yes, but you’ll look better when I’ll rip it off of you. ”

You wanted to protest, but you felt your dress lifting up to your waist. With his skilled hand, Nikolai moved his hand back down gently, until he got to your panties.

He pulled them down, seeing you’re slightly wet.

“Oh my! Dove, you didn’t think of going out like this, right? It would be hard of not thinking of me, hm? Should i do anything about it or do you still wanna go out? It’s your decision.”, you looked away in embarrassment, making him even more amused.

“I assume you pick the first option? Don’t worry, dear, you can tell me.”, you were late anyways- would it really matter if you miss it once? Okay, just pull yourself together.

“..Please, f-fuck me, Kolya-”, you halfway finished your sentence and his two fingers were drilling into you.

In scissor motion too, he knew how crazy this makes you go. (But not crazier than him)

Anyway, he was pumping his digits in ‘n’ out of your cunt. Just when he pumped them out that last time, he took them out to taste your sweet slick.

“God, you taste so fuckin’ sweet, y’know that, dove?”, Nikolai then started taking off his undergarments, excited to see his cock, you got even wetter.

You let your head rest on his shoulder when he entered your pussy, with no problems. Geez, how were you so wet?

While he was entering though, you accidentally bit him, leaving a hickey.

Not that he cares, infact, he loved it.

This motivated him to start moving, since he was getting you ready earlier, it made you already sensitive.

Nikolai picked up the speed, desperate for his release. Not noticing that it was way to much for you. He noticed when he felt something wet on his shoulder, were you crying?

Indeed, you were.

Nikolai was overstimulating you, when you you couldn’t take anymore, the tears flowed. Not because of pain, it was because of the overwhelming pleasure you received from him.

Which was why you came faster than you normally would. You looked up to face Nikolai, he picked up his pace even more. Was he getting off from you crying because of his cock?

“Fuck! I’m close, dove..just keep on clinging on me like t-that!”, Nikolai moaned.

Just like he said, he came.

When you tried to control your breathing again, Nikolai rested his head on your shoulder.

“So, what about round two in the bedroom, darling? We still have the whole night, right?”

This was rushed, but i actually like this one! 🥳

#nikolai gogol smut #bsd s4 #nikolai x reader #nikolai smut #bungo stray dogs nikolai

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intoanotherworld23 · 1 year

Text

Caught Red Handed

Pairings: Reader x Chris Evans, Reader x Miles Teller

Warnings: NSFW 18+ ONLY DNI, yeah this whole thing is just pure smut and sex sex sex so you have been warned

Summary: You’ve been sleeping with two of your very attractive teachers for a while now, and so far you haven’t been caught

Two of my favorite men in one writing, what could be better?? Hearts, reblogs, and comments are very much welcomed and appreciated please and thank you!! If you wish to be added to a tag list let me know and I’ll be more than happy to add you! Thank you guys so much! XOXO

✨Please do not copy and paste my work or steal my work or publish my work as your own or I will have you reported✨

"Off to see your lover?" Turning around to your friend smirking at you. "Or should I ask which lover?"

"Maybe I'm going to see both." You wiggled your eyebrows making her laugh. Shuffling through your best lingerie deciding which one to wear.

"I can't believe you are actually sleeping with two professors." She shook her head. "It's a matter of time before you get caught."

"I'm not going to get caught Y/F/N." Rolling your eyes as you finalized your look.

"What happens if you do though?" She asked making you stop for a minute. "You will get expelled and two amazing teachers get fired, and possible sent to jail."

"That's not going to happen I promise you." You reassured her, but she still didn't look convinced.

She sat there on the bed watching as you adjusted your outfit so make yourself look more seductive. You knew she secretly judged you for what you were doing, but at the same time you knew that she envied you.

Nobody else on campus knew about this affair, and you planned to keep it that way. You never meant for it to go on this long, but you just couldn't help it.

Crazier thing is neither teacher knew about the other. They thought they were the only one, and the last thing you wanted was for them to find out about the other.

"Whatever happened to that one boy you were talking to?" She asked you once again. "He was really nice and quite good looking."

"Yeah he was, but he wasn't exactly on my level." That was true though he wasn't up to speed with your sex drive. If anything it would probably scare him off.

"Oh come on he was perfect for you." She tried convincing you once again.

"He was good for a one night stand and that's it." Looking over your makeup in the mirror. "I need someone that can handle me."

"And fucking two teachers is the answer to that?" You knew she wasn't asking a question, but was rather being a smart ass.

"Please can we not do this right now I don't want it to ruin my mood." Groaning as you put on your shoes.

"Don't wait up for me." Mumbling as you shut the door behind you without looking at her.

Walking down to your car as you tightened the coat around you. Hearing your phone buzz multiple times indicating someone was texting you. Pulling it out with a grin on your face.

From Chris: God I can't wait to feel between those legs.

From Chris: I hope your dripping for me.

From Chris: Baby you got my cock so hard and you aren't even here yet.

From Chris: I'm gonna fuck that pussy so hard sweetheart

Laughing to yourself at how worked up he already was for you. You were in for a long night ahead of you.

——————————————

"Chris." Choking out a moan as your back arched off the bed.

The smirk on his face grew even larger hearing you moaning his name. If anything it encouraged him to keep pounding into you harder.

"Can feel you squeezin my cock sweetheart." He chuckled as he watched your face contort in pleasure. "Such a tight little pussy for me."

Feeling your orgasm building up again as you turned your head to the side, and gripped the sheets beneath you. Biting onto the pillow trying to muffle your screaming.

"Say my name again baby." He whispered into your ear as he sharply thrusted inside of you making you squeal.

"Oh god Chris." Your toes curling against the bed as he tightened his grip on your hips. "Chris."

"Fuck that's it sweetheart let everyone know whose fucking you so good." His thrusting was slowing down, but just as powerful. "Such a good girl."

“Stuffed full of my cock.” He’s never felt more powerful and strong than he did right now.

Rotating his hips at a certain angle had your legs trembling. Leaning forward so he could attach his lips to yours. His mouth swallowing all your moans his movements never once missing beat.

"Your pussy so sweet it won't let me go." His stated matter of factly as his fingers reached down to rub your clit.

"God the sounds you make for me sweetheart." His eyes trained down to where his cock was disappearing. Your juices coating his cock making him groan at the sight.

Closing your eyes for a brief moment as the pleasure was taking over your body. Feeling a hand grip your chin making you open your eyes to see those sparkling blue eyes staring you down.

"Look at me when you cum around my cock." He growled as the veins in his neck popped out.

Leaning on his forearms so his hands were on either side of your face. It was such an intimate moment, but you found yourself entranced with his eyes. Like he was holding onto you and didn't want to let you go.

"Oh fuck right there." You screamed as he hit your sweet spot. The pleasure boiling to the top you felt you might explode. "Harder Chris."

Opening your legs even further so he could thrust deeper. The muscles straining to the point it was painful, but feeling his condition inside you motivated you to keep them open.

"Such a cock hungry slut for me." Groaning against the skin of your neck before his lips moved downward towards your breasts.

Sucking on the nipples turning them raw and hard. One of your hands reaching out to grip his hair as your senses were overwhelmed. Feeling him smile against your flesh as to how he was making you feel.

"Can feel how fucking close you are sweetheart." His words making your legs shake. "Pussy always begging for me."

The moans were just spilling from your lips you didn't care who heard you. Your body twitching and moving all around unable to control yourself anymore. The warmth was spreading through out your whole body.

"Cum for me baby." His voice straining as he was trying to control himself as well. "Cum around my cock."

"Be a good girl and squeeze that pussy for me." He encouraged with his filthy words. Feeling that burning in the pit of your stomach as you were on the edge.

His movements stopped as his cock remained still inside of you as your pussy clenched hard around him. Both of your groaning as you looked each other in the eye.

“We’re getting better at this.” He joked making you laugh.

“Told you practice would make perfect.” Giving him a sly wink a huge grin appearing on his face.

“I’m gonna have to wash these sheets cause of you.” Taking note of the wet spots underneath you.

“That’s your fault asshole.” Smacking his shoulder playfully at his comment.

“Yes I guess you’re right,” leaning his head towards your ear his lips brushing against your lobe, “I got that pussy gushing.”

Burying his head in the crook of your exposed neck giving you comforting kisses. Rolling over so he's on his back as well. The room is silent and you decide to get up, and start getting dressed.

"Are you spending the night?" Chris finally spoke. Before you could respond your phone vibrated.

Reaching over to grab it to see who it's from slightly smiling when you see the familiar name, and the timing couldn't have been anymore perfect.

From Miles: I miss your wet pussy

From Miles: When are you coming over slut?

To Miles: Soon! Keep your cock in your pants

From Miles: That's asking a lot sweetheart considering you didn't ask me to do that the other night.

"Who is that?" Chris asked making you put your phone away.

"Uh it was just my roommate." Turning around to look at him. "Just wants to know if I can help her with her essay."

"I mean I am a teacher maybe I can help." He chuckled as he got out of bed, and stood right in front of you wrapping his arms around your waist.

"As much as I would love to accept that offer I just can't." Pushing yourself away from him so you could get finished getting dressed.

"Why?" His voice sounded disappointed but also angry at the same time. "Got another date?"

"No of course not." You chuckled nervously. "I just told you my roommate needs me."

"If you don't want to spend the night with me just say it." His tone changing making your stomach churn.

"That's not it at all." You became defensive not liking being put on the spot light like that. "Besides this isn't anything serious."

"Yeah your right you're just some girl I'm fucking." His words a punch to your gut. Not believing he actually just said that to you.

First he wants you to spend the night with him, and then he turns around and says your just some girl he's fucking. Maybe he was just trying to hurt you, but still it was completely uncalled for.

"Right yeah of course go help your roommate." His warms hands left your body now leaving you feeling cold.

A part of you felt horrible for sleeping with two teachers, and keeping it a secret. At the same time thought you loved having the attention of two handsome men.

Chris was absolutely everything you wanted in a man. He was not afraid to give you what you wanted and more. Plus he had this sweet side to him that made your heart swoon.

The sex with him was incredible, and it was never vanilla. A lot of the times he would put your needs before his. If you wanted your pussy eaten out all day he damn sure would do it. Chris was every woman's dream man, and you didn't think you deserved him at times.

Miles though was a bad boy that every girl dreamed of having. He was rough and edgy and didn't want all that sweet sentimental shit. He was the type he wanted his cock sucked whenever he wanted it, and he would shove you out the door whenever he was done.

At first it turned you off but you couldn't stay away from him. He literally treated you like his own personal slutty slave. Although at times he did have his sweet moments.

"Leave the door unlocked I've got someone else coming over." His voice was harsh and empty towards you. As he walked away not even bothering to say goodbye.

Feeling your throat swelling up as you stood there in bewilderment. Out of the two of them you were starting to grow feelings for Chris. You were pushing him away and you hated doing that. Trying to keep the tears from falling you quickly walked out the door, and drove over to Sebastian's home.

——————————————

"Ride my cock you dirty little slut." His hands gripped your hips harshly they would definitely leave bruises.

"God your such a greedy little bitch for me." His hand came down hard on your ass that stung. "So eager to please me."

Moving your hips up and down as you tried to keep up with him, but he wasn't slowing down. Your thighs were starting to become sore, but it would be a waste of breath to tell him that.

Besides you didn't think you would still be horny after Chris, but you were. It was almost like Chris's words field the fire inside of you and you just became horny out of spite.

"Oh god fuck." You squealed as his cock was hitting your sweet spot over and over again. Your nails scraping down his chest leaving scratches. "Oh yes oh my god."

"Your tight pussy is squeezing my cock so hard." He groaned as he looked down to where you two were connected.

"Jesus just look at how soaked you are for me." Growling as he looked back to your face. "I want to hear you scream my name."

His hand slapped your ass multiple times sure to leave a hand print. It stung like hell but fuck did it feel good. That was one thing about Miles he loved to spank you so hard tears came to your eyes. You loved it just as much since the pleasure cancelled the pain.

"If only everybody knew what a cock hungry slut you are for me." He groaned as he watched you bounced up and down on his cock, your breasts moving up and down.

"Fucking your teacher like this." He always loved throwing that fact in your face. "Might have to fuck you in my classroom next."

"You're just a filthy little whore." He thrusted sharply into you with each single word. "All mine to fuck whenever I want."

"Go on for me slut let everyone know who is fucking the shit out of you." His hand reached up to grip your throat so he was choking you. The sensation was bringing you even more pleasure as you felt your cheeks heating up.

Both of your hands wrapped around his to keep it there. You could feel yourself climbing over the edge and it was a matter of minutes before you were to your orgasm.

"I own this pussy." His voice deep as he looked straight into your eyes. "This is my pussy to fuck."

"Such a greedy slut for my cock." Your eyes were rolling into the back of your head.

"I'm gonna cum." You wailed as you felt the urge to go hitting you right in the stomach. "Shit shit shit."

"Soak my cock baby." He commanded you as one of his hands crept downwards to rub your clit harshly. "I can feel that pussy squeezing me."

"Oh my god." You screamed as your entire body shook and your orgasm smacked you in the face. Tears forming in your eyes with the intensity.

"Fuck me that's it." Miles groaned as his cock twitched inside of you. "So fucking good."

His hand lightly tapping your ass making you giggle. Whenever his playful side made an appearance you couldn't help but get all giddy and warm inside.

Both of you sweating and breathing heavily as you sat on top of him. No words were said as he moved making you get off of him. His cock slipping from your body making you hiss.

The room was quiet as you awkwardly sat there with his and your cum dripping from your pussy. Wondering if you should just leave or make small talk.

"I'll be on my way then." You mumbled as you hopped off the bed, and started to put on your clothes. Putting your clothes on when a voice called out.

"Wait." Turning around towards Miles surprised he was talking to you. Usually once you two were done he would say a word or two, but he never asked you to stay. It was a silent agreement you two had.

A look of hope written across your face that he would ask you to stay or something. Maybe things were looking up with Miles. Your heart was pounding as you stood there waiting for his next words.

"Get my smokes for me." Your jaw almost dropped to the floor. That's all that asshole wanted was for you to get his smokes. In disbelief you grabbed his smokes and tossed them to him.

What in the actual fuck was going on today? First with Chris and now with Miles. Getting the best kind of sex you could ever imagine only to be treated like absolute dog shit the next. Today wasn’t your day, and all that excitement you felt with them was starting to disappear.

Miles, you weren't really surprised he was treating you like this, but he had you thinking for a split second he wanted to talk or that he would start treating you differently. Silently hoping Miles would show you his sweet and romantic side for once.

He started to play on his phone without even glancing your way. You were so uncomfortable you honestly couldn't even just walk out the door, but that's exactly what you did.

Slamming the door behind you hoping he got the message. Pulling your phone out of your purse dialing the one number you probably shouldn't be calling. Right now you were feeling a little bit upset, and thought if you apologized to him you’d feel better.

Standing in front of his house as you looked down at the ground in shame. Praying he would answer, but not being surprised if he didn't. He probably didn't want to speak with you right now.

Hearing the call go through all of a sudden you heard ringing around you. Looking at your phone wondering why it sounded like the call was coming from right in front of you.

Slowly raising your head to see what was going on you saw Chris standing in front of his car with his phone in his hand while it was still ringing. A stoic look on his face while you stood there in shock. Your entire body went cold, and your face felt numb.

"Fuck." Quietly whispering to yourself when you realized the situation you were now in.

He had this dark and dangerous look in his eye you were almost scared of him. Unable to speak as you just stood there and stared at him. Watching his jaw clench, and the hand by his side clenching into a fist. He was trying so hard to restrain himself right now. He wanted to bend you over his car, and spank you so hard you begged him to stop.

"I think you have some explaining to do sweetheart." You heard Miles voice behind you making you jump as a shiver ran up your spine.

“You’ve been a very naughty girl.” Chris tsked as he slowly approached you. Miles wrapping his arms around your waist feeling his erection pressing into your back side. “Fucking two men. Two teachers at that.”

“What should we do with her?” Miles said to Chris as he nibbled on your ear biting down making you whimper.

“I’d say she needs to be punished.” Chris smirking as Miles smacked your backside a gasp escaping your lips. “Until we feel she’s learned her lesson.

#miles teller #miles teller smut #miles teller x reader #miles teller fanfiction #miles teller imagines #chris Evans #chris Evans smut #Chris evans x reader #Chris Evans imagines #chris evans fanfiction #miles teller fic #Chris Evans fic

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trashworldblog · 5 months

Note

What is hmbomberguy (I can’t spell) ur reblogs are making me so curious but I cannot handle getting into more content/ content drama rn.

hi! yes. so hbomberguy is one of those 2hr long video- twice a year or less youtubers. who make content exploring a topic (like plagerism on youtube, vaccines and autism, etc).

his new video talks about video essay type youtubers who steal all their writing from documentries, books, articles, etc. and makes thousands of dollars off of other peoples work.

james sommerton is the main focus of the video, but he also shows how iiluminaughtii stole from documentries (and even listed the piriting site she watched it from as a source? lol) and internet historian stole an entire article, format, visuals, and all, and got 10 million views for it (and stole so much his video got taken down) and theres this other video game guy that got hired at ign and the got fired from ign for piriting and is a homophobic right wing guy?? (details are fuzzy, this is a 4 hour video i watched once, forgive me).

um. but, the james sommerton stuff just gets crazier and crazier the way this guy just makes a ton of money by lying to his community. he ends up accidently stealing work from one of his patreon members (he stole on purpose, i assume he didnt know who he was stealing from was a patron). he asked and got thousands of dollars to mame a fake (?) film studio that has made no films, and only says theyre in preproduction for a new film every 10 months. he also, yknow, steals from queer voices, basically harming his own community for profit. and when he's called out for stealing, he either shouts homophobia or shifts the blame to his co writer, who probably knows nothing about the plagerism.

anyways. its a bit of a drama thing. but honestly its a lot about how and why we should care about the art and media we consume online, and just how many people who look like they have their life together and are making lots and lots of content, seemingly on their own or close, actually are just stealing from talented people. it heals a bit of that imposter syndrome for people that do make genuine content online, and shows the consumers what making too much too quick actually means for the content they enjoy. the get the equivalent of meat grinded facts mixed with misinformation, subtly changed quotes, and 0 sources, or a laundry list of unorganized and unlabled sources if they want to learn more.

also i like this tweet. summarizes it well for me.

um. but thats my thoughts on it. i liked it because it reminds me that people who are churning out content one-man-show style aren't making the greatest stuff. i struggle with feeling like my work takes too long. but this was a great reminder that im actually making something good (i hope!), or at least, something that is truely coming from me. so its gonna take time to do it. but it'll be worth it because it'll be coming from me. (and also good. hopefully)

also the money hbomberguy is making off this video is going to the people james stole from. so thats really nice.

#hbomberguy #i havent watched a lot of his stuff but this video was really good #thanks for the ask!

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lover-of-mine · 9 days

Note

I keep thinking about the Tommy leaving post and the Buddie being ready for each other post and I feel like there's a comparison I want to make here but I'm not sure exactly what it is but something about Tommy leaving because he was not down with that whole mess of date, understandably, but also Buck's boatload of issues still even tho Tommy came back & they're in this "maybe this could be the something I'm ready for" & potential issues that might crop up going forward like will Buck be hesitant still or dive headfirst or some combination, will Tommy feel like it's too much or just not working, will it be the thing that finally makes something click in Buck's head that he needs to go to therapy bc hey Tommy is different from his exes but the issues are still the same idk or he decides it's not working bc it's not the thing he wants but he's ready to figure that out so again therapy! but also when he realizes he's in love with Eddie & they could be it for each other he knows he doesn't want to make those same mistakes and the way to do that is to be honest with himself and Eddie and it's not perfect but they're both in it and self enough aware they know they can make it work together (therapy would be so good but also Maddie or Bobby have some wisdom here too) like a desperation almost of I love him and I want him and this is it for me but I'm so scared of losing it all and it's like well. What are you gonna do about it? Are you gonna let yourself have this? I read a fic today where when they were discussing starting something but Buck was scared Eddie was like "we deserve to be happy too and being with you makes me happy" and that's all I want now okay sorry this is so long and probably makes no sense but I didn't know who to send it to I can stop rolling it all in my head over and over again send help or a sedative my god they make me feral and all these new ttpd edits are making it 10000x more

Okay, I see what you mean, and I am team Buck/Therapy first and foremost, but let's discuss Tommy outside the perfect queer Yoda people seem to have put him in. First of all, Tommy didn't come back, the energy that exists there is that there would be no second date if Buck didn't ask him for coffee (and Buck only called because Eddie told him to). I don't blame Tommy for walking away, the situation Buck put him in is shitty, but he did not come back, he indulged Buck in a coffee for whatever reason I don't understand. I don't understand why someone would agree to go to someone's sister's wedding after one kiss and half a date they walked out of. But what I'm getting from Tommy is that he's not gonna put up with Buck's bullshit just because he's cute. And Buck is diving in head first, asking someone to be your date to your sister's wedding after half a date where they left you on the curb when he's out to exactly 2 people is somehow crazier than buying furniture with Natalia, because at least there he had what? 3 successful dates under his belt? Buck is in the hamster wheel, this time with a guy. Dating a guy is bringing him clarity in some aspects of his life, but he is still showing the same patterns when it comes to dating. Will he break out of his pattern this time? Who the fuck knows. Realizing he's repeating these patterns and letting go before he gets in too deep, realizing he needs to work on himself, would be a major sign of growth from him, but Tommy pointing something out and making him take action works too, but I don't know what or how that could be approached. I was talking about this with someone last week, I'm pretty sure i sent them a voice note of like, 12 minutes on this, but do we trust Buck to separate the way he's infatuated from what he actually needs? That his bisexuality is his no matter what? Because I don't. If he's still that insecure about Eddie when Eddie has been stable in his life the whole time they've known each other, then I don't trust him with anything emotional, really. Could he wake up one day and realize maybe it was about Eddie, see what's in front of him and proceed to work through his insecurities? Sure, they could go there, especially with how intertwined Eddie is to bucktommy, make Buck realize his feelings, work through his insecurities somehow and realize he needs to talk to Eddie and that they will be okay no matter what. But the thing is, Eddie loves Buck too much. Like the post said, he loves Buck at his own detriment, so if Buck goes all weird on him for whatever reason again (which he probably would if he realizes he might be in love with Eddie, he would panic, 705 Buck would freak out if realized he's in love with Eddie) he's gonna internalize that, and that's something they need to address before there is any movement into making them romantic.

Because now that there's a real chance buddie is gonna go canon, they need to address some problems that were created between them, mainly the way they assume things about each other a lot instead of having an open conversation. All they need is an open conversation, I will accept if the show magically decides they can talk to each other now, that the issue was the denial, but Buck needs to ask for shit, he needs to talk when he's insecure, he needs to not let Eddie get away with assuming he's right, and Eddie needs to stop assuming he can read Buck's mind, he needs to call Buck out when he's getting in his head, and he needs to stop trying to fix past mistakes with someone else, they need to actually be able to address things that hurt them, because they will hurt each other, the question is how they work through the problems. Dating your best friend, even more after being best friends for this long comes with issues, the adjustment would be intense because they have an intense relationship already. And they both need to let go of the idealized version of what a relationship should look like they have. Can Tommy help Buck there? Yeah, absolutely, but he also shouldn't be expected to hold a grown man's hand through his own feelings, yk? Buck doesn't know what he wants and he's working through it, allegedly, so, like, there's potential there but I have no idea how this can unfold tbh. They need to get to the point where they're like "I deserve happiness" but also realizing that happiness doesn't look the way they think it does, that it's never gonna be perfect, but that it is worth fighting for, you don't find it, you make, works here too, but the thing is, you need to keep making it as long as you're together, love is not all it takes, the fight never stops. I've been thinking about this a lot too.

#yeah #i dont know dude #but i feel you #911 #911 speculation #i really need a tag for asks #anon 😌

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pykxz · 6 days

Text

hi.

you're on a rock floating in space.

pretty cool, huh?

some of it's water.

fuck it, actually most of it's water.

i can't even get from here to there without buying a boat.

it's sad.

i'm sad.

i miss you.

how did this happen?

a long time ago, actually never, and also now, nothing is nowhere.

when?

never.

makes sense, right?

like i said, it didn't happen.

nothing was never anywhere.

that's why it's been everywhere.

it's been so everywhere you don't need a where.

you don't even need a when.

that's how every it gets.

forget this.

i wanna be something.

go somewhere.

do something.

i want things to change.

i want to invent time and space.

and i know it's possible because everything is here and it probably already happened.

i just don't know when to start.

and that's exactly where it started.

whoah, i paused it.

i think there's a universe now.

what's it made of?

quarks & stuff

ah, that's a thing.

in a place.

don't like it?

try a new place.

at a different time™.

try to stick together, because the world is gonna get bigger.

and emptier.

but it's not empty yet.

it's still very full, and about a kjghpillion degrees.

great news!

the quarks are now happily married, in groups of three called a proton or a neutron

and there's something else flying around too that wants to join in but can't cause it's still too

HOT great news!

the protons and neutrons are now happily married to each other.

and some of them even doubled up.

great news, the electrons have now joined in

congratulations, the world is now a bunch of gas in space.

but it's getting closer together.

and it's getting closer together.

and it's getting closer toge-

it's a star

new shit just got made!

some stars burn out and die.

bigger stars burn out and die with passion, and make some brand new, way crazier shit.

space dust

which allows newer, more interesting stars to be made, and then die, and explode into

even crazier space dust

so now stars have cool stuff around them, like rocks, ice, and funny clouds, which can make some very interesting things.

like this ball of flaming rocks for example.

holy shit, we just got hit with another ball of flaming rocks.

and it kind of made a mess.

which is

now the moon

weather update:

it's raining rocks from outer space.

weather update:

those rocks might have had water inside them, and now there's hot steam in the sky.

weather update:

cooler temperatures today, and the floor is no longer lava.

weather update:

it's raining.

severe flooding alert:

the entire world is now an ocean.

volcano alert:

that's land!

there's life in the ocean

what?

something's alive in the ocean

oh cool, like a plant or an animal?

no, a microscopic speck.

it lives at the bottom of the ocean and eats chemical soup, which is being served hot and fresh, made from gnarly space ingredients left over from when it was raining rocks or whatever.

oh yeah, and it can do that.

it has secret instructions written inside itself telling it how to build another one of itself.

so that's pretty nifty, i would say.

tired of living at the bottom of the ocean?

now you can eat sunlight!

using a revolutionary technique, you can convert sunlight into food

taste the sun

side effect: now there's oxygen everywhere and the sky's blue.

then the earth might have been a snowball for a while, maybe even a couple of times.

it's a sponge.

it's a plant.

it's a worm, and some other types of weird strange water bugs and strange fish.

it's the Cambrian explosion

"wow, that's animals and stuff"

but we're still in the ocean, hey, can we go on land?

why?

the sun is a deadly lazer

oh okay.

not anymore, there's a blanket

now the animals can go on land.

come on, animals, let's go on land!

nope, can't walk yet.

and there's no food yet, so i don't care.

ok, will you learn to walk if there's plants up here?

maybe, said some bugs, and fish.

ok, so i can go on land, but i have to go back in the water to

have babies

learn to use an egg.

i was already doing that.

use a stronger egg.

put water in it.

have a baby, on land, in an egg.

water is in the egg.

baby, in the egg, in the water, in the egg.

works for me.

bye bye ocean

and now everything's huge.

including bugs.

wanna see a map of the land?

sure.

oh fuck, now everything's dead.

just kidding, here are the survivors.

keep your eye on this one because it's about to become the dinosaurs.

here's another map of the land.

yeah, it broke apart, don't worry about it, it does that all the time.

here comes a meteor.

and the dinosaurs are gone

it's mammal time, here come the mammals.

look at those breasts.

now they're gonna dominate the world and one of them just learned how to grab stuff.

and walk.

no, like, walk like that.

and grab stuff at the same time.

and bang rocks together to make pointed rocks.

"ouch"

and set things on fire.

"yeouch"

and make crazy sounds with their voice.

"gneurshk"

which can mean different things.

that's a human person

and now they're everywhere.

almost.

ice age

what, you can walk over here?

cool.

not anymore

well i guess we're stuck here now.

let's review.

there's people on the planet.

and they're chasing their food.

fuck it, time to plant some grass.

look at this.

i control the food now.

now everyone will want to be my friend and live near me.

let's all build houses except mine is bigger because i own the food.

this is great, i wonder if anyone else is doing this.

tired of using rocks for everything?

use metal.

it's underground.

better farming was just invented, in a sweet dank valley right in between these two rivers.

and the animals are helping.

guess what happens next

more food.

and more people who came to buy the food.

now you need people to help make the food and keep track of the sales.

and now you need houses for people to live in and people to make the houses, and now there's more people and they invent things, which makes things better and more people come and there's more farming and more people to make more things for more people and now there's business, money, writing, laws, power.

Society

coming soon to a dank river valley near you.

meanwhile, out in the middle of nowhere, the horse is probably being tamed.

why is all my metal so lame and lumpy?

tired of using lame, sad metal?

introducing

Bronze

made with special ingredient tin from the far lands of tin land.

i don't know, my dealer won't tell me where he gets it.

also, guess what?

egypt

meanwhile, out in the middle of nowhere, they figured out how to put wheels on a horse.

now we're getting somewhere.

also

china

and did i mention

indus river valley civilization

norte chico

the middle east is getting more complicated, maybe because it's in the middle of the east.

knock knock, er, clop clop.

it's the people with the horses.

and they made an empire.

and then everyone else copied their horses.

greeks

ah look, it must be the greeks, er, a beta version of the greeks.

let's check in with the indus river valley civilization.

they're gone.

guess who's not gone?

china

new arrivals in india, maybe it's those horse people i was talking about, or their cousins or something

and they wrote some hymns and mantras and stuff

you could make a religion out of this.

there's the bronze age collapse.

now the phoenicians can get down to business

also, can we switch to a metal that's a little easier to find?

thanks.

look who came back to israel, it's the twelve tribes of israel.

and they believe in God

just 1 though, he's got like a ten step program.

here's some huge heads.

must be the olmecs.

the phoenicians make some colonies.

the greeks copy their idea and make some colonies.

the phoenicians made a colony so big it makes colonies.

here comes the assyrian empire.

never mind, it's the babylonian- median-

it's the Persian Empire

"wow, that's big"

ah, the buddha was just enlightened.

who's the buddha?

this guy, who sat under a tree for so long that he figured out how to ignore the fact that we're all dying.

you could make a religion out of this.

oops, china just broke, but while it was breaking, confucius was figuring out how to have good morals.

ah, the greeks just had the idea of thinking about stuff.

and right over here, alexander just had the idea of conquering the entire persian empire.

it's a great idea.

he was great.

and now he's dead.

hopefully the rest of the gang will be able to share the empire evenly between them.

knock knock, it's chandragupta, he says get the hell out of here.

will you get the hell out of here if i give you 500 elephants?

ok thanks, bye

time to conquer all of india

most of india

but what about this part?

that's the tamil kings, no one conquers the tamil kings.

who are the tamil kings?

merchants, probably

and they've got spices

who would like to buy the spices?

me, said the arabians, swiftly buying it and selling it to the rest of the world.

hey, china put itself back together again, with good morals as their main philosophy.

actually, they have three main philosophies.

out here, the horse nomads run wild and free, and they would like to ransack your city.

let's check the greekification levels of the greekified kingdoms.

greekification overload!

bye, said the parthians.

bye, said the jews.

hi, said the parthians, taking over the entire place.

heyyyyyyyy, said the romans, eating the entire mediterranean for breakfast.

thanks for invading our homeland, said the jews, who were starting to get tired of people invading their homeland.

hi, everything's great, said some guy who seems to be getting very popular and is then arrested and killed for being too popular, which only makes him more popular.

you could make a religion out of this.

want silk?

now you can buy it from china.

they just made a

brand new road to the world

or you can

get there on water

sick! new trade routes! said india, accidentally spreading their religion to the entire southeast.

hmm, that's a good place for an epic trading kingdom.

there goes buddhism traveling up the silk road.

i wonder if it'll reach china before it collapses again.

remember the persian empire?

yep, said the persians, making a new one.

axum is getting so powerful they would like to build a long stick.

has anyone populated madagascar yet?

let's do it together.

china is whole again

then it broke again

still can't cross the sahara desert?

try camels.

hell yeah! now we've got business

said the ghana empire, selling lots of gold, and slaves

hi, i live in the roman empire, and i was wondering

is loving jesus legal yet?

no.

actually, ok, sure, said constantine, moving the capital way over here to be closer to his

main rival

don't worry about rome, it won't fall.

it's the golden age of india

there's the gupta empire, not chandragupta, just gupta.

first name chandra.

the first.

guess who's in rome?

barbarians

what's a barbarian?

non-romans, said the romans, being invaded by non-romans.

r.i.p., roman empire, er, actually just half of it, the other half is just fine, but it's not in rome anymore so let's give it a new name.

the mayans have figured out the stars

oh and here's a huge city, population: everyone

the göktürks have taken over the entire eurasian steppe.

great job, göktürks.

how's india?

broken.

how's china?

back together

how's those trading kingdoms?

bigger, and there's more of them

korea has 3 kingdoms.

japan has a kingdom, it's the sunrise kingdom.

deep in the arabian desert, on the top of a mountain, the real god whispers in muhammed's ear.

so he goes down to the cube where everyone worships gods and he tells them their gods are all fake.

and everyone got so mad at him that he had to leave town and go to a different town.

you could make a religion out of this.

and maybe conquer the world as well.

the roman empire is long gone, but somehow the pope is still the pope.

plus there's

new kingdoms all over europe

i wonder if there's room for moors.

here's all the wisdom.

in a house.

it's the baghdad house of wisdom.

just in time for the

islamic golden age

let's bring stuff to the coast and sell it, and become the swahili on the swahili coast, said the swahili on the swahili coast.

remember this tiny space you have to go through to get from here to there?

someone owns that now.

wanna get enlightened in the middle of nowhere?

the franks have the biggest kingdom in europe, and the pope is so proud that he invites the king over for christmas.

surprise! you're the new roman emperor, said the pope, pretending to still be part of the roman empire.

then the franks broke their kingdom into what will later be called france and not france.

but the northerners, or just norse if you don't have much time, are exploring.

they go north, from the north to the northern north.

and they find some land.

two types of land.

and they name them accordingly.

they also invade some other places, and get called many names, such as vikings.

there's the rus.

the kievan rus.

are they vikings?

i don't think so, said the kievan rus.

ok, fair enough.

the pope is ready to make some more emperors.

of the "roman empire".

the holy roman empire.

it's actually germany but don't worry about it.

new kingdoms.

christianize all the kingdoms

which brand would you like?

mine's better.

time to conquer england, said william.

it's a bird, it's a plane

it's the seljuk turks

aah! said the byzantine empire who's getting so small and almost doesn't exist anymore.

we need help!

they need help, so they call the pope.

hey pope, can you help us get rid of the seljuks?

maybe take back the holy land on the way?

come on, i know you want to take back the holy land.

yes, i do actually want to do that.

let's do a crusade.

crusade

they did many crusades, some of which almost didn't fail.

but at least the italians got some sweet trade deals.

goodbye mayans.

hello toltecs

goodbye toltecs.

hello mississippi

look at those mounds.

there's the pueblo.

i always wondered how to build a town in a cliff.

guess who's here?

khmer.

where?

here.

and pagan is there.

vietnam unconquered itself, korea just became itself, and japan is so addicted to art that the military might have to take over the government.

china just invented bombs, and typing.

and the mongols just invaded most of the universe.

nice going, Genghis!

i bet that will last a long time.

some of the islamic turks were unaffected by the mongol invasions because they were busy invading india.

is it tonga time?

i think it's tonga time.

i just found out where the swahili gets all their gold.

look at this chad.

means "lake".

there's an empire there.

right in the middle of

Africa

the king of mali is so rich he's going on tour to let everyone know.

wow, that guy's rich, everyone said.

the christians are doing a great job reconquering iberia, which will soon be called spain and not spain.

please remain christian.

we will check in later to see if you're still christian when you least expect.

whoops, half of europe just died.

ming

china's back, yay!

hey khmer, time to share.

new kingdoms here and there.

oh, look who controls all the islands.

it's the mahajapit.

majahapit.

mapajahit.

mahapajit.

mapajahit.

majapahit?

oh, italy's really rich, time for them to care a lot about art and the ancient classics.

it's kinda like a rebirth.

here's a printer.

let's make books.

so you think you can conquer the byzantine empire?

yep, said the ottoman turks.

nice job, ottoman turks.

whoops, you missed a spot.

don't forget to ban europe from the indian spice trade.

what? that's bullshit, said portugal, spiceless.

well i guess we'll have to find another way to india

wait! said christopher columbus, probably smoking crack.

if the world is round, let's go this way to india.

nah, don't worry, we already got this, said portugal.

so chris goes to spain.

hey spain, wanna hire me to find india by going around back of the world?

no.

please?

no.

please?

no.

please?

ok.

so he sails into the ocean.

and discovers more ocean.

and then discovers the indies.

and japan.

let's draw a line to decide who gets which half of the world.

the aztec and inca empires are off to a great start.

i wonder if they know that europe just discovered their continent?

the habsburgs are marrying into so many royal families they might have to start marrying each other.

move over lithuania, here comes moscow.

ivan wants to make russia great again.

move over timurids, maybe go invade india or something.

persia just made persia persian again.

let's make it the other kind of islam.

the one where we thought the first guy should have been the other guy.

hey christians!

do you sin?

now you can buy your way out of hell.

that's bullshit.

this whole thing is bullshit.

that's a scam.

fuck the church.

here's 95 reasons why, said martin luther, in his new book, which might have accidentally started the protestant reformation.

you know what would be magnificent, said suleiman, wearing an onion hat?

what if the ottoman empire was really big?

which it is now.

what if russia was big? said ivan, trying not to be terrible.

portugal had a dream that they controlled the entire indian ocean, including the spice trade.

and then that dream was real.

and spain realized that this is not india, but they pillaged it anyway.

damn, said england and france.

we gotta start pillaging some stuff.

then the dutch revolt and all the hipsters move to amsterdam.

damn, said amsterdam.

we gotta start pillaging some stuff.

question 1: can you get to india through north america?

no, but at least there's beaver.

question 2: steal the spice trade.

that's not a question, but the dutch did it anyway.

sugar

guess where all the sugar's made?

in brazil.

stolen

and the caribbean.

and it's so god damn profitable you might forget to not do slavery.

the next thing on russia's to-do list is to get bigger.

britain and france are having a friendly discussion about who should control the entire world.

more specifically, ohio.

then it escalates into a seven year discussion, giving prussia a chance to show austria who's boss.

but what about britain and france, did they figure out who's boss?

yes they did.

it's britain.

guess who's broke?

also britain.

so they start taxing the hell out of america.

fuck you, says america, declaring their independence, and fighting for it.

and france helps them win, now france is broke.

and britain'll have to send their prisoners to a different continent.

wait, if france is broke, why do the king and queen still wear such fancy dresses?

let's overthrow the palace and cut all their heads off! said robespierre, cutting everybody's head off until someone eventually got mad and cut his head off.

you could make a reli- no, don't.

haiti is staring to like the idea of a revolution.

especially the slaves, who free themselves by killing their masters.

why didn't we think of this before?

wait, who's in charge of france now?

said napoleon, trying to take over europe.

luckily, they banished him to an island.

but he came back

luckily, they banished him to another island.

there goes latin america, becoming independent in the latin american wars of independence.

britain just figured out how to turn steam into power.

so now they can make

many different types of machines and factories with machines in them so they can make a lot of products real fast

then they invent some trains.

and conquer india and maybe put some trains there.

hey, china! said britain.

buy stuff from us!

nah dude, we already got everything, says china.

so britain tried to get them addicted to opium.

which worked, actually.

but then china made it illegal and dumped it all into the sea.

so britain threw a hissy fit, and made them open up five cities and give them an island.

britain and russia are playing a game where they try to stop each other from conquering afghanistan.

also, the

sultan of oman lives in zanzibar now

"that's just where he lives"

india just had a revolution, and they would like to govern themselves now.

nope, said britain, governing them even harder than before.

technology is about to go crazy

the united states finally figured out whether slavery is good or bad.

it's bad, they decided.

and then they continued manifesting their destiny, which is to kill the rest of the natives and take their land and maybe kick out the mexicans too.

i know, let's rape africa, said europe, scrambling to see who could rape it the fastest.

they never got ethiopia

britain and france are still hungry.

they never got thailand

the united states ran out of destiny to manifest, so they're looking for more.

hawaii

cuba

wait, spain controls cuba.

well, blame something on them and go to war!

what should we blame on spain?

let's blame the maine on spain.

so they blame the maine on spain.

now we're in business.

to celebrate, they kick panama out of panama and make a canal, connecting the two oceans.

britain just found oil in the middle east.

it makes cars go

china is so tired of being bossed around that they delete their old government and make a new, stronger government, which is accidentally weaker and controlled by a guy from the previous government.

europe hasn't had a war since the last war.

so they start world war 1.

look at those guns.

it's gonna be a great war.

so great we won't need a second one.

after it's over, they blame germany.

russia went on strike and the workers overthrew the government.

now everyone's paycheck is the same.

communism

in the soviet union

the arabs revolt and britain helps.

now the ottoman empire's gone so we can give the

jewish people a place to live

hopefully the arabs won't mind.

let's cut the cake, said sykes and picot, carving up the remains of the not-so-ottoman-anymore empire.

except turkey, turkey makes a brand new turkey

and then the saudis conquer arabia.

it just seemed like the right thing to do.

hello?

yes, it's the 1920's calling.

let's get in the car and drive to a party and listen to jazz on the radio and go to the movies.

the economy's great and it'll probably be great forever, just kidding.

germany's back, featuring hitler, the angry mustache model.

and he's mad at the jews for existing.

japan is finally conquering the east, and they're so excited they rape nanking way too hard.

they should probably just deny it.

hitler's out of control.

so the international community tackles him and then tries to explain why killing all the jews is a bad idea.

but he kills himself before they could explain it to him.

that's world war 2

bonus round!

pacific showdown.

united states vs. japan.

fight!

finish him

let's unite all the nations and have some

world peace

seems legit.

hi, i'm gandhi, and if britain doesn't get the hell out of india, i'm gonna starve myself in public.

wow, that worked?

bonus, now there's pakistan.

actually two pakistans.

one of them can be bangladesh later.

the jews and the arabs finally figured out which one of them should live in the holy land.

me, they both said at the same time.

let's divide up the land so everyone's happy.

sike, they both get angrier

look out china, there's a new china in china.

what's on the menu?

communism!

no thanks, said the other china, escaping to an island.

i wonder which one is the real china?

there's the korean war, korea versus korea.

nobody wins, then it's on pause forever.

let's meet the sponsors.

oh, it's the two global superpowers.

they're having a friendly debate over which economic system is good, and which one is an evil virus of Satan.

and they both have atom bombs.

fight!

wait, no, that would be the end of the world.

let's just keep it cool and spy on each other instead.

and make sure we have enough atom bombs.

i'll race you to space.

now let's make some more countries fight themselves.

europe is tired of pillaging other continents, so the continents they were pillaging are tired of being pillaged.

so here's a new map, with new countries.

now you can't tell who they're being pillaged by.

the united states finally decided whether racism is good or bad.

they decided it's bad, and the world agrees.

south africa might need another minute to think about it.

let's check the world population.

whoa.

okay.

technology's better too, that might keep happening.

the soviet union decides to relax a little, and accidentally falls apart.

europe makes a union, so now they can all use the same money, except britain, because they don't feel like it.

let's check the mail.

surprise, it's on the computer.

whoops, someone just attacked america.

i bet they'll remember that.

phone call.

surprise, it's in your pocket.

wanna learn everything?

surprise, it's on the computer.

now your phone's a computer, which is in your pocket.

whoops, the economy just crashed.

don't worry, the big banks won't fail because they're not supposed to.

surprise!

flying robots.

with bombs.

wanna print a brain?

some people have no friends.

some people have no food.

the globe is warming

and the ocean is full of plastic

let's save the planet! said everybody, not knowing how.

let's invent a thing inventor, said the thing inventor inventor, after being invented by a thing inventor.

that's pretty cool.

by the way, where the hell are we?

#Bill Wurtz #history of the entire world #i guess #thanks letterbox for this #and thanks random person who commented the entire script of history of the world i guess #honestly i just wanted to put it somewhere so i dont lose it

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mrs-dr-reid · 3 months

Text

Sparkling Diamond

Pairing: Jason Sudeikis x Broadway!Reader

Summary: Jason goes to see "Moulin Rouge! The Musical", and Y/N just so happens to be going on as Satine when Karen Olivo suddenly calls in sick

Genre: Soooooooo fluffy

Warnings: Swear words, age gap (Jason is 43ish, Reader is early to mid 30s), slight jealousy, mentions of in-show death, spoilers for Moulin Rouge probably, potentially very incorrect descriptions about how celebrities going to see shows on Broadway works, Aaron Tveit, Karen Olivo, and Amber Ardolino being conspiratory little shits

A/N: This sucker came to me in a dream because I am VERY into Moulin Rouge and Jason Sudeikis right now, so enjoy my brain vomit that I did way too much research for. GIF isn’t mine, I got it off a gif keyboard

Word Count: 3509

———————————————————————

When Y/N got the call that Karen Olivo was out sick and that she’d be going on for her, she certainly wasn’t expecting to meet her celebrity crush, nor was she planning on giving him her phone number, but crazier things had happened. Y/N arrived at the theater way before anybody else, mostly due to her nerves because it was only her second time going on as Satine instead of her usual role as one of the can-can girls, and she ensured she was completely warmed up before even thinking about doing anything else (she refused to get into costume until the actual call time so she wouldn’t completely sweat through it before the show even started). Since she was the only cast member there, she ran through her songs and choreography while waiting for everybody else to show up.

The first person to arrive was her fellow swing (and other Satine understudy), Amber Ardolino. She said, “Excited for your big night?”, as she put her bag down in their shared dressing room, so Y/N laughed nervously and said, “Yeah. But also scared shitless. It’s supposed to be a packed house tonight, and everybody’s gonna be expecting Karen. I don’t wanna let anybody down,” so Amber smiled and said, “You killed it last time, tonight won’t be any different. Plus, you’re getting paid to be serenaded by and make out with Aaron Tveit,” before wiggling her eyebrows suggestively, which made Y/N burst out laughing before she replied, “He does have a voice like liquid gold, but you and I both know he’s not my type,” and started getting into costume.

Amber started doing her makeup, and as the hair stylist Caitlin came in to help Y/N into her wig and mic, she said, “Hey, did you hear that a celebrity’s coming to the show tonight?”, which made Y/N raise a questioning eyebrow before saying, “I did not. Any idea who it is?”, so Amber replied, “Only that it’s a man, which does jack shit to narrow it down,” as she curled her eyelashes. Y/N nodded thoughtfully, then said, “What if it’s Ewan McGregor?”, which sparked a whole debate over which male celebrities could potentially be in the audience that night.

Jason was excited, to say the least. The second he heard Moulin Rouge was coming to Broadway, he got a ticket for the first show he could, which was about two weeks after it opened. He made it to the theater, and despite his best efforts, he stirred up a little bit of a ruckus with his presence. He found his seat with the least amount of disruption he could manage, and then opened his playbill to see a slip of paper that read “The role of Satine will be played by Y/N L/N”, which made him raise an eyebrow at the fact that an understudy was going on for the leading lady so early in the show’s run, but he shrugged it off since it wasn’t his place to judge someone’s misbehaving immune system or potential family emergency.

He flipped through the program until he found her headshot, and he let out a low whistle because she was beautiful, but he instantly felt guilty about it because she looked a lot younger than him. The lights started going down, so he closed his program and settled in for the show. Based on his precursory glance at the musical numbers, he knew Satine didn’t show up until “The Sparkling Diamond”, so he sat tight and waited.

He boogied in his seat slightly during the opening number and "Truth, Beauty, Freedom, Love", then “The Sparkling Diamond” started, and Jason was practically on the edge of his seat with anticipation. As Y/N was lowered onto the stage on a trapeze in her glittery costume, Jason’s breath was taken away by how much more gorgeous she was in person. She began to sing, and Jason thought the world had stopped spinning, because not only was she beautiful, her voice was too.

He couldn’t help but feel a (frankly unwarranted) spike of jealousy every time Aaron put his hands on Y/N, whenever she clung to him, and whenever they kissed, which was ridiculous because he didn’t even know this woman and he was feeling so many emotions due to her frankly phenomenal acting. When intermission arrived, Jason was thankful for the little bit of respite it gave him, even though his mind raced with plans to somehow get the chance to meet his sparkling diamond as he took pictures and made small talk with some of the people around him.

Backstage, Aaron and Y/N were getting a drink of water and chatting when Amber came speeding around the corner and exclaimed, “GIRL! You are going to DIE when I tell you who came to see the show tonight!”, so Y/N put down her water and said, “Okay, now I’m curious. Who?”, which made an almost manic grin spread across Amber’s face (and a barely imperceptible smirk flash across Aaron’s) before she grabbed Y/N’s shoulders and said, “Jason. Friggin. Sudeikis.”

Y/N’s jaw dropped, and she said, “No. You’re shitting me!”, so Amber said, “I am 100% not shitting you! Davin saw him taking selfies with people near the back of the house,” which only sent a spike of anxiety through her body. She said, “And I’m only being told about this now?!?!”, so Aaron piped up, “Well, you’re basically in love with the guy. If you knew before the show, you’d have gotten all in your head, and maybe even have refused to step foot on stage,” but he instantly regretted saying anything because Y/N turned her scorching gaze on him and said, “YOU KNEW MY CELEBRITY CRUSH WAS GONNA BE IN THE AUDIENCE, AND YOU DIDN’T SAY ANYTHING?!?!”, actually starting to panic now.

Amber quickly stepped in and said, “Hey, hey, hey, you’re spiraling. You kicked ass out there, and after intermission is over, you’re gonna kick even more ass,” Aaron adding, “Exactly. I’m honored to have a love interest as talented as you,” in an attempt to suck up to her so she wouldn’t hurt him. Y/N glared at both of them for ten seconds, then she let out a groan and said, “Okay, fine. Let’s go kick some ass. But don’t think I won’t get you for this later, Pretty Boy,” before hitching up her skirt and storming back to the stage to get ready for Act II. Amber said, “I’ll say some nice words at your funeral,” then scurried off to take her place, making Aaron let out a groan before following behind her.

Jason watched with rapt attention as the show reached its climax, and he actually shed a tear when Y/N pretended to die in Aaron’s arms. He was the first person on his feet for the standing ovation, and he’s sure he cheered the loudest when Y/N took her bow. After the encore, everybody started filtering out, so Jason went to follow them when a young woman wearing all black and a headset came over to him and said, “Hi, Mr. Sudeikis. I’m with the production team, and a couple of our cast members wanted to invite you backstage as a surprise for our Satine, Y/N. She’s a big fan of yours. Totally up to you, of course,” which made his eyebrows fly up to his hairline before he said, “Yeah, absolutely!”, and allowed her to lead him backstage.

Meanwhile, Y/N was in her dressing room having a mini-celebration with Amber because she somehow managed to not fall flat on her face for the remainder of the show despite knowing her celebrity crush was watching her every move. Aaron knocked on the door and said, “Oh, Ladies!”, in a sing-song voice, so Y/N said, “Yeah, Aaron?”, but all he did was grin mischievously before the stage manager Davin appeared in the doorway and said, “Oh, good, I found you. Aaron, Y/N, Jason Sudeikis is coming backstage to meet you guys,” which made Amber squeal in delight while Y/N just froze in place.

Y/N said, “He is?”, trying and failing to conceal her nerves, so Davin said, “Yeah, a couple of the cast members invited him back. Let’s go,” before bustling off again. Y/N shot dirty looks at Amber and Aaron, then said, “If I survive this, I’m gonna murder you both,” before stalking out of the dressing room to catch up with Davin, choosing to ignore the high-five her co-stars exchanged behind her.

She turned the corner and almost stopped breathing because Davin was making small talk with THE Jason Sudeikis. Davin saw her standing there gawking, then said, “Ah, there they are. Mr. Sudeikis, allow me to introduce our Christian and Satine, Aaron Tveit and Y/N L/N,” which made Y/N jump slightly when Aaron materialized next to her and said, “It’s a pleasure to meet you,” while going over to shake Jason’s hand.

Jason took it and said, “Yeah, great to meet you too. You did a heck of a job out there. Best show I’ve seen in a while,” which made Aaron bow his head appreciatively before he looked over his shoulder and said, “Sparkles, get over here,” so Jason followed his gaze to where Y/N was standing with a nervous look on her face. He smiled reassuringly at her, so she steeled herself and said, “Hi. Big fan. I loved you in Tumbledown. And 30 Rock,” while walking over to shake his hand. He chuckled and said, “Now those are ones I don’t hear very often,” so Y/N smiled shyly and said, “What can I say, I like the deep cuts,” while playing with the skirt of her costume.

Aaron said, “You should have seen her when she found out you came to see the show. I thought she was gonna explode, she was so excited,” which made Y/N elbow him in the ribs and turn redder than the velvet dress she wore earlier in the show. Jason smiled and said, “Well, I’m flattered. And might I say you give Nicole Kidman a run for her money, Miss L/N. I could listen to you sing all night long,” before shooting a wink at her, which made her eyes widen before she giggled nervously and said, “Oh, I don’t know about that,” which made Aaron scoff and say, “Sparkles, come on, we’ve been over this. You’re crazy talented! Own that shit!”, while wrapping an arm around her shoulder and jiggling her playfully.

Jason felt the spike of jealousy surge through him again, but Y/N just shot Aaron an exasperated look and said, “I’m not above kicking your ass, Pretty Boy,” which made Jason chuckle slightly and Aaron raise his hands in mock surrender. Jason said, “Alrighty, well, it was great to meet you both. Before I get out of your hair, would you mind signing my playbill?”, and pulled a pen out of his pocket, so Aaron said, “Absolutely! But you have to sign the stair wall before you go. Theatre tradition,” before accepting the pen and playbill from Jason and using the nearby wall as a makeshift clipboard.

He passed them to Y/N once he was done, and she had no idea what possessed her to do this, but after she’d signed her name, she wrote her phone number underneath it and drew a heart next to it for good measure (she refused to acknowledge Aaron’s suggestive eyebrow wiggles). She handed the pen and the playbill back to Jason, said, “Thank you again for coming to see the show. I gotta get out of this getup, so bye!”, then waved quickly and scampered back to her dressing room. Aaron shook his head affectionately, then turned to Jason and said, “You didn’t hear this from me, but you’re her celebrity crush, and we couldn’t let you leave without giving her a chance to meet you. Thanks for making her day, man,” before playfully saluting with a wink and walking back to his dressing room.

Jason was speechless, but he still accepted the Sharpie Davin handed to him and signed the wall with the date. He exited the theater after thanking the production crew for the chance to meet Aaron and Y/N, and as he walked down the block, he opened his playbill to where their autographs were and stopped dead in his tracks, because while Aaron had simply signed his name, Y/N had written a series of numbers that could only have been her phone number beneath hers with a heart drawn beside them. He physically turned to look back at the theater, and he said under his breath, “That was bold. I like it,” before resuming his walk.

Meanwhile, Y/N was removing her makeup while Amber basically interrogated her about her interaction with Jason. Amber said, “Was he nice? Did he like the show? What did he think of you?”, so Y/N said, “Amber, for the love of god, breathe. Yes, he was very nice. He said it was the best show he’s seen in a while, so I think he liked it. And he said I give Nicole Kidman a run for her money,” which made Amber let out a crow before she said, “Oh my god, he was flirting with you!”, making Y/N’s cheeks flush bright red again.

She exclaimed, “He was just being nice!”, then Aaron’s voice said, “No, he was definitely flirting with you, Sparkles,” which made both women turn to see him leaning against the doorway of the dressing room in his street clothes. Y/N scoffed and said, “And what makes you say that?”, so he raised his eyebrows incredulously before saying, “For one, he complimented your voice and compared you to Nicole Goddamn Kidman when all he told me was that I did a heck of a job. For two, he winked at you like three times and only looked at me when I talked directly to him. And for three, he went stiffer than a board when I put my arm around your shoulders then instantly relaxed when you told me to shove it. He was super into you,” which made Y/N have to pause and think about it.

Aaron made a “you see what I mean?”-type face, then tapped the doorframe two times and turned to leave, but not before he said, “And in case you forgot, you’re the one who gave him your number without being asked,” which made Y/N shoot a death glare at his back and Amber let out a squeal before she exclaimed, “WHEN DID YOU GIVE HIM YOUR NUMBER?!?!”, with an incredulous grin on her face. Y/N said, “He asked us to sign his playbill, and when I was signing my name my pen slipped and I wrote my number underneath it,” making Amber let out a shocked laugh, then Aaron called from the hall, “And she drew a heart!”, which made Amber let out an even louder shocked laugh before Y/N yelled, “SHUT IT, TVEIT!”, and went redder than a tomato.

Her phone lit up with a text from an unknown number, and she opened it to see the words, “Do you give all of the celebrity audience members your number?”, which made her eyes practically bug out of her head as she let out a tiny, “Holy shit,” before wordlessly holding her phone out to Amber so she could see the message. Her jaw dropped, and she whisper-yelled, “Is that him?!”, so Y/N whisper-yelled back, “Who else would it be, Michelangelo?!”, before she texted back, “Only the ridiculously good-looking ones,” and chucked her phone into her bag before she could regret it.

Amber said, “You are BOLD, Girl!”, which made Y/N say, “Hey, you can’t say I didn’t shoot my shot,” while grabbing her coat, then she said, “I’ll see you tomorrow,” before grabbing her bag and walking out the door. As Y/N walked back to her apartment, her phone buzzed with another text message from Jason that said, “Well, now you’re just fluffing my ego,” which made her giggle and respond, “It’s not ego fluffing if it’s true,” with a wink emoji before adjusting her bag on her shoulder and continuing her walk.

The next day, Y/N arrived at the theater at the normal call because she was back to being a can-can girl, and while she was doing her makeup, Karen poked her head in the door and said, “Hey, I heard it went really well last night. Congratulations!”, with a big smile on her face. Y/N turned around in her chair and said, “Yeah, thanks! Turns out I was super nervous for no reason at all. Looks like you’re feeling a lot better today,” so Karen said, “Yeah, I am. It must have just been something I ate, because I felt right as rain by the time I got Aaron’s intermission check-in text. He said that Jason Sudeikis came to see the show last night. Did you get to meet him?”, with a knowing smile on her face.

Y/N turned pink, then said, “Yeah. And I gave him my phone number because I’m an idiot, but he ended up texting me, so it worked out,” before going back to doing her makeup. Karen said, “Oh yay! If he plans on coming to see the show again, let me know and I’ll make sure I’m sick again for you,” then scurried off, and it took Y/N about 20 seconds to process what she said before she whipped around and yelled, “DID YOU FAKE BEING SICK SO MY CELEBRITY CRUSH WOULD SEE ME AS SATINE?!?!”, but Karen was already gone.

Y/N let out a groan, then Amber came strolling through the door while saying, “Heyyy, Glitter Girl!”, a little too casually, so Y/N said, “Amber, I’m only gonna ask this once. Did you know Jason was gonna be at the show ahead of time, and did Karen fake being sick so I’d be the one going on for her?”, which made Amber freeze before shooting her a guilty smile and saying, “Kind of?”, earning an incredulous glare and a, “What do you mean, ‘kind of’?!?!”, from Y/N.

Amber let out a sigh and said, “I overheard the box office people talking on Wednesday, and one of them said ‘Sudeikis’ followed by ‘tomorrow’, so I put two and two together. But Karen was genuinely not feeling well after the show on Wednesday, so I told her about what I overheard. She said that she was planning on calling off, and when I mentioned that Jason may or may not be your celebrity crush, she said she’d do her best to make sure you were the one going on for her and not me, and Aaron said he’d do the same thing. Please don’t be mad!”, before steepling her hands in a pleading gesture.

Y/N let out a long sigh, then said, “I’m not mad. I’m just a bit peeved that you guys went behind my back like that,” which made Amber let out a huge sigh of relief before borderline tackling Y/N in a hug. Her phone buzzed on the table, so she picked it up to see a text from Jason that said, “Break a leg tonight, Twinkle Toes!”, and she must have blushed, because Amber nudged her and said, “You can’t be too mad at me because now your celebrity crush is crushing on you too,” earning a playful swat on the arm from Y/N before she said, “Yeah, yeah, whatever. Get ready, Dollar Store Cupid,” and shooed her away.

Y/N thought for a second, then opened her camera app and took a selfie of her making a silly face in just a wig cap, her stage makeup, and a ratty “I ❤️ NY” tank top to send to Jason with the words “Thanks, Cowboy!” accompanying it. She finished getting into her costume, then right as the five minutes to places announcement went out, Jason texted her back saying, “Yep, that’s your contact photo now. Here’s an equally silly picture of me so you don’t feel left out,” with an attached picture of him with a pencil mustache and crossed eyes.

She giggled, then changed the boring “J” icon her phone automatically gave him to that picture and sent back, “Excellent. About to take places, so I’ll talk to you at intermission,” and the last text she read before she stuck her phone in her bag was a thumbs up and the cowboy emoji. What she didn’t know was that Jason was dangerously close to picking the heart emoji instead, but he figured he had all the time in the world to get to know her enough to finally be able to use that emoji whenever he wanted.

———————————————————————

#logan writes #jason sudeikis x reader

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preservationofnormalcy · 3 months

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Hello, uh, this is going to sound crazy, but I really hope you’ve had crazier because that means you can help me.

I woke up this morning and everything was…fractals. Everything is fractals. I didn’t notice it at first, but then I looked too closely at my bedside table and I couldn’t stop seeing it. I can see so so much of everything, all at once, no matter where I look. The world doesn’t feel solid. It just goes on and on and on. It doesn’t even go away when I close my eyes, it just gets darker.

I couldn’t even have breakfast this morning because the bowl I tried to pour my cereal into just…kept going. It didn’t feel any different when I touched it, but I just couldn’t look at it any longer.

This isn’t sustainable, I can’t keep going like this. I have a job I had to call in sick to because I almost got hit by a car crossing the street. I need someone to fix this.

Please help me.

Oooh, haven't had a noncompliant math question in a while! 'Cause that's what this is, math. Fractals are math. It's a little different this time, of course, fractals represent a pretty complex equation. You probably looked at some weird books, but I'm not gonna sit here and blame you.

The typical therapeutic method for treating noncompliant math episodes is doing as little math as possible to rest the psychic muscle, but this seems like an advanced case. We may need to try more advanced methods.

You'd need to talk to someone who knows more for a better "diagnosis" but more advanced treatments would involve a specialized chamber designed to isolate you from the rest of the reality in increments. Total isolation is not something we try lightly, people don't survive very long in there.

Come to us and we'll get you in touch with someone affiliated with Abnormal Therapies at AbSci U.

#noncompliant mathematics #office for the preservation of normalcy #ask #advice #AbSci University

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cxsmic-reactions · 1 year

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How would the companions react to riding the nuka cola space rollercoaster?

(p.s im so glad your back! Your my favorite fo4 blog)

Companions React to riding the Nuka-Cola Space Rollercoaster (+GAGE)

Once the Nuka World Roller-coaster, finally got electricity and was fixed up. Sole wanted their companion to go with them and try it out. While some of them are fine with it, others aren't.

Cait:

The short answer was NO. No matter how many times Sole asked Cait it was a straight NO. But with a few bottles of beer and a bet of 150 caps from Hancock. Cait strapped herself into the rocket. For the first few seconds Cait was fine but when the machine started moving forward. Suddenly 150 caps weren’t enough but it was too late. And with that, the ride took off taking Cait with it. While Sole was laughing and cheering, Cait was clawing at the machine while screaming. Seeing Cait freak out Sole immediately takes her hand to calm her down. Without hesitation, Cait instantly calmed down followed by a blush. Soon after the ride was over and they arrived at the beginning again, Cait screamed, “One more go!”. It's gonna be a long night.

Curie:

Roller-coaster? This is something that she read about in the lab a long time ago. She always wanted to ride a roller coaster. Some of the scientists that she worked with used to talk about the Nuka World rollercoasters every now and then. Which made her wish she could experience one. But that was all before she got her new body, so she could definitely experience that now. And with that both of them got onto the coaster and shot off past the coaster doors, speeding through the coaster, Curie was so overwhelmed with such happiness. She didn't know what to do, either cry, laugh, or scream. So why not all three. Even though the coaster started only minutes ago it felt like seconds to her. Begging to ride one more time they went off again. After the third time, Sole got off spinning while Curie kept going. She was so happy!

Danse:

Absolutely not. This was a firm no. There was no getting around it. The fact that Sole would even ask a question like that, and the fact he was even entertaining it by answering them was even crazier. But a drunk Danse was completely different. He was faster jumping on the roller coaster than Sole was. Though it was absolutely hilarious to see Danse so excited on the coaster, the one downside was that Danse throw up halfway through the ride which got on the coaster railing. Hopefully, Codsworth could clean it up later. Once the coaster was over Danse wanted to go around again but Sole got him out of the coaster and got him to bed. Geez.

Deacon:

This is an obvious answer YES! There is nothing this man will not do. So the fact that Sole had mentioned it, he was already there. Even before Sole. In fact, Deacon had already ridden the coaster twice by the time Sole had brought it up. And of course, he wouldn't mind going with Sole this time. Jumping into the coaster with Sole the coaster started as soon as they buckled in. The coaster then sped off. With this being Sole's first time they shrieked with wonder and surprise as the lights flashed and the aliens battled. So to not ruin Sole's experience Deacon acted shocked and he also pretended to be surprised. Once the roller coaster ended they both got off happy that they got to experience it together.

Hancock:

HOLY FUCK YES. We all know Hancock was down for absolutely anything. Hoping in the rocket with Sole in between his legs, he took some jet and they were off. Feeling the rush of jet and the adrenaline. Hancock cried tears of joy. He has never felt such a high as this one. But all things must come to an end. So holding a screaming Sole in his arms while the ride came to a close, he got an idea. He wouldn't tell anyone, but this was probably one of the best days ever since he discovered he could make BuffJet. Coming to a stop Sole got out but before they could help Hancock out, he was off again. Leaving a hearty scream and an empty jet canister behind.

MacCready:

ABSOLUTELY! There was no way in hell he was gonna pass up this chance. He strapped in and even before Sole could get in Mac ordered the Mr. Frothy to press go. Shooting off like a rocket all anyone could hear and see was Mac smiling and screaming with his hands in the air. By the time the rollercoaster was over Mac still wasn't ready to get off. He had to go around 5 times before Sole gave up and left. But Mac was none the wiser he just kept asking to go again. Maybe later he will ask Sole to join him.

Valentine:

Well, he wasn't entirely against it but also not entirely for it. He mainly got on just to ease Soles' constant begging and bribing. He gave Piper his hat and sat down next to Sole accepting his fate. Shooting off Sole looked at him with a huge smile. He smiled back but his smile soon turned into a loud scream followed by laughter and then more screaming. He was having fun but this still scared him. Minutes go by of this same emotional cycle. And once it ended Sole smiled brightly and thanked him. Even though he was a little scared at first, it was really fun, and seeing Sole happy made it 10x better.

Piper:

She was a little on the fence but it took very little convincing from Sole to do it. Plus maybe she could put this story in her paper. Maybe something a little positive to give her readers. So she strapped herself in with Sole not too far behind and waited for the ride to start. As if on cue the ride shot off before she could even finish her thought. This was probably the most fun she's had in years. This was such a crazy feeling. She never felt joy and fear at the same exact time before. The pits in her stomach were knots the whole time and she couldn't help but sweat through the palms of her hands. But in the end, it was all worth it, she enjoyed it so much that she might have to bring Nat to try it one day.

Preston:

He was super nervous about it at first. It's not like he has a fear of heights, it's just that he doesn't like being up high that long. The highest he was fine with was the castle wall or even the window at the Museum. So this was a bit of a bigger task he was quite ready for. But with Sole's constant reassurance and their hand on their shoulder, Preston felt okay and ready for anything. Strapping into the coaster with Sole right next to him, he closed his eyes to prepare but before he could even start... BOOM! The coaster shoot right off instantly without hesitation Preston began screaming at the top of his lungs with Sole laughing right next to him. Which felt like seconds to Sole felt like hours for Preston. He didn't stop screaming until the coaster stopped completely. All he could say was never again as he left the coaster.

X6:

There is no shock with this one. NO! There was absolutely no way that X6 was going to sit his ass on that rollercoaster. That was until Sole was made the leader of the Institute and anything they order he had no real choice but to follow. Even though secretly he would have gone but he's a courser he has a reputation to uphold. So with that both Sole and X6 strapped in and enjoyed the ride. While Sole was happy and screaming, X6 kept his face completely straight. Though on the inside he was screaming like a schoolgirl. After the ride Sole got off and walked away, along with everyone else, heading back to the Fizz Top for dinner. X6 stayed and hid until he knew everyone was for sure gone. Once the coast was clear X6 ordered the Mr. Frothy to start up the roller coaster. Jumping back in the coaster went around again and again until he was tired of it. If only Sole knew...

BONUS:

GAGE:

Absolutely the actual fuck not. FUCK NO. There will be nothing that will get Gage on that damn roller coaster. Not unless he had a gun pointed at his head, and even in that case he would still say no. So if that's the case and he feels that way, why the hell is he sitting next to Sole on the coaster waiting for the ride to start. This wasn't how he wanted to spend his night, he just couldn't remember how he got there. And then he remembered CAPS. Mags Black. She had bet him 3,000 caps that he wouldn't ride the coaster and wouldn't scream. So here he was sitting on the coaster with Sole while the other raider bosses stood and watched. Shooting off like a rocket they were off, zooming through the ride, which made it harder and harder to keep his composure. Letting out a small shriek he quickly covered his mouth. Soon coming back into the platform again Mags glanced at Sole and before they could say anything Gage kicked them. Sole waving off Mags and letting her know that Gage won. She tossed Gage the bag of caps and left with a puff. Before Gage got out Sole snatched the caps back with a smile and said "I wasn't gonna say anything about you screaming but since you kicked me, I think I'll keep this." Gage just shrugged and nodded his head. Well, at least he had a little fun.

This was requested by Anon. I hope you enjoyed it it's been a little while since I've made these so bear with me guys :)). Thank you so much for requesting and let me know if you guys want more. <3<3

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cookieswithay · 10 months

Text

💀"No...no way"👿 Part 2

Still Miles Morales x fem reader

○°•●•°○°•●•°○°•●•°○°•●•°○°•●

⚠️Warnings: slight cursing. Action. Dark vibe. Graphic threats. Dipping into the 3rd movie and Color coded words (kinda to show which Miles is being described)⚠️

And just like last time...

⚠️Spoilers!⚠️

●•°○°•●•°○°•●•°○°•●•°○°•●•°○

• Despite coming at the...other one really hard, Miles's anger dissolved. This was even crazier. He really saw himself, but...he looked completely different. They shared every feature except for hair and suit...which is scarily familiar.

• "Baby,"

• His doppelganger said. His gaze was locked on the girl Miles realized he was squishing.

• "Come on over here."

• You nodded at your bf and looked up the anomaly. Kinda like "My man wants me so..." He let you go without any resistance. (His focus kinda fell off of you anyway🤷‍♀️)

• There was a eerie silence afterwards. The feeling of danger was there, but not enough to act...yet.

• "Listen closely, Hermano"

• ('THICK accent' Miles thought)

• "I'm really tempted to ram my claws through your chest,"

• "But we're in my girl's room."

• As he spoke, armor began to form.

• "So, I'm gonna be nice,"

• ...Miles knew who he was.

• "And give you a 5 second head start."

• The prowler.

• The claws. The purple color scheme. The terrifying digital eyes. It all resembled Uncle Aaron's suit. Suddenly, Images of his family flashed through his mind. He had to save his dad!

• In a matter of seconds, he had a plan. He shot a web at YOU and secured the sides. Of course, your Miles jumped to help you. But, that let him defenseless.

• Miles yanked himself forward bringing both feet into the other's chest. Promptly, crashing him through the door.

• "Sorry, Y/N!"

• He called, while running down the hall. Normally, he would NEVER use you in a plan. But, this was pretty serious. (Plus you were just against the wall, so you probably won't hate him) He yanked open the front door and slid down the stairs.

• This guy didn't just run from 1,000 spider peeps to get stopped here. That was until he got to the end of stairs. Another familiar face caught him. One that hurt.

• "Uncle Aaron...?"

• It was really him. Tall, chill, and bald. He even had the same fashion sense.

• "Miles?"

• It felt nice to hear his voice again. But he's been here too long to think it was actually his uncle.

• "What's with the suit?"

• The ex prowler asked. That made Miles feel a little self conscious. It was a cool look...right?

• "I thought you didn't like red-"

• A sudden sharp blow to the back cut off his hearing. Miles fell to his knees. Horrible dizziness was taking over. (Somehow) Looking through his legs, he saw black and purple jordans. Dang it...he...he let his guard down...

• "Do you think you killed him?"

• "No. If I wanted to kill him, I would've sliced his back open."

• "Ew, babe."

• "What? I would."

• This conversation awoke Miles from his darkness. He was tied to a chair and his back ached. He was caught. But he wasn't gonna let them know he was awake. From what he felt, they're 3 people in the room. You, this dimension's Miles , and... someone else. Anyway, he had to be careful. The prowler was strong and the unknown figure could be even worse. Slowly, he pressed his fingers against the ropes. Hopefully, the electricity would be silent.

• "What're we gonna do when he wakes up?"

• "I dunno. Maybe shake him down for answers?"

• "...Or I could kick his ass."

• (That kick did a number on his chest)

• "Maybe we should go with the answers. I wanna know where he came from."

• The ropes were beginning to snap! A little louder than he wanted, but a explosion was comi-

• Crackt!!!

• A steel (shoe) sole was smashed into his face. A pained grunt was only thing he could muster as it's force pushed his chair backwards. Blood oozed from his nose and lip. What the hell?

• "I told you he was awake."

• Great, the third person was his uncle. The shoe flew back, landing on his clone's socked foot. The mini prowler slowly approached him. (...Was he taller that him?) He stepped down on the middle of the chair.

• "Alrighty, hoss. Where'd you come from and when are you leaving?"

• The hero frowned, weighing his options. It was nice to see you, but he really didn't want to get any more acquainted with "Anti-Miles" over here. BUT, with his hands crunched behind him, he had to cooperate...well until he had a plan. He took a deep breath.

• "I don't know what universe...thing I came from, but I wanna leave as soon as possible."

• "It's important."

• Intrest entered Miles, but he chose to ignore it. He had no reason to listen to his shadow clone's life story. He already got his revenge so he just had to wrap this up-

• "What's the rush?"

• You asked, hopping on your boyfriend's back. Great, you're intrigued. Miles chewed the inside of his cheek. Normally, he'd tell you but...

• "Did you not hear her, bruh?"

• Irritation sat in the Anomaly's chest. This guy was seriously getting on his nerves. Oblivious (or ignoring) the tension, you continued to ask with your eyes. He couldn't say no to you.

• "My dad...could die."

• Saying it outloud made his chest tighten.

• "If I don't get to him in two days...a villain's..."

• He stopped and took a deep breath. He didn't wanna finish the sentence. You got the gist. (Plus, his eyes were welling up)

• "So that's why I gotta go imme-"

• The chair he was tied to suddenly flipped up and he was face to face with his double glaring at him.

• "Go where?"

• He said sourly.

• "This isn't your prissy, fluffy Brooklyn."

• "The place is hell at night, so you can't just go swinging around on a whim."

• He threw the chair the back, making the chocolate hero slam down hard.

• "Have a damn plan before you try to save someone's life."

• As irritating as that speech was, he had a point. He didn't know this dimension and darn sure didn't know how'd he leave. This was WAS a whim. But, it's not like he could sit here-!Suddenly, he felt a tap on his foot. He looked up.

• "Give me one second, hands-er, Miles."

• You whispered. You stood up and followed after your man. The next few minutes sounded...interesting. He heard talking at first, then it progressed into KISSING. Struggling. Uncle Aaron laughing and then a ticked off "fine." Did you just use the power of persuasion? and lips. Once again, he was yanked up, but this time by his suit. Dude looked extremely pissed off, but had to say something.

• "Let's..."

• The prowler heaved a angry sigh.

• "Let's go save your dad."

°○°•●•°○°•●•°○°•●•°○°•●•°○°

Alright! I actually made a part 2! What'd you think about the escalation of ending scene? Pretty smart right? Just you wait till part 3! Stay cool, peeps!😎

#spiderman across the spiderverse #miles morales #miles 42 #earth 42 miles morales x reader #miles x female reader #miles x reader #spiderman beyond the spiderverse #part 2 #purple color #the prowler #to be continued

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naanima · 8 months

Text

youtube

Oh, dear Ratboy. I really like it when he does long podcasts. It helps that he can communicate. Interview starts around the 1h.11sec mark. Dot points things of interest:

He has finished moving from Calgary completely, doesn't even have winter clothes anymore. LOLs.

When he first arrived in Florida he was happy to take a backseat, but the team wanted him to get involved in the leadership group.

He really loves living in Florida.

VGK was the best team they played. Boston & Vegas were very similar. Talks about how Boston slapped them during two of the regular season games, but they played really well against them for the other two games. And that's why he had the belief they could win. OMFG. He fucked up by jumping on the ice and got the penalty LOLs. It was all his fault.

He thinks players who come through in OT etc are the ones who want the puck on their stick. Good or bad they will need to be able to live it.

His dad always preached live in front of the net. Take some physical abuse in the games, earn it to score. Can't get your stick tied up. He learns a lot from Brady when it comes to spinning it off and getting it into the net. Watches every one of Brady's games.

When he switched to the Right Wing he watched a lot of vids of good right wing players.

Evolved as a player year to year. Same mindset as when he was a kid, "screw you I'm getting that puck." Paul gets on him when he gets into a bit of a shoving match on ice with guys he shouldn't. LOLS.

Offseason - earlier was PT, playing catch-up in strength, conditioning wise more cardio in the hopes to play more mins and faster. He feels he is better prepared this season. He is back to 100%.

Microphones on ice - good for the game. NHL gotta do a better job. It is evolving more via the players and teams. Players don't like it too much bcos they would feel like walking on eggshells. If it is used properly it can grow the game.

Wedding vids - makes athletes look crazier than they are.

Media/SocMed blowing things up. Keith talking about his team being "soft' - he was pissed bcos of how it got blown up. They had a chance to be in the playoffs and then they lost four games in a row. Ouch.

His current health - "Everything feels great." He didn't realise he broke his sternum, he thought maybe a collarbone, it wasn't how hard the hit was, it was the spot. He had to leave the game bcos he had to do concussion protocol. Game 3 didn't really hit him how bad he was. After the game he was not feeling great. Drove home that night with a sling, probably shouldn't have done that. The next morning he couldn't get out of bed. The day after he had to call Brady to help him get up, he couldn't even remember if he had a shower. LOLs. During one of the scrums he couldn't even really grab people's jerseys.

Getting into fights etc. Not that they want to get into a fight, it is more that they just hate losing. LOLs.

Sticking Jonathan Quick - doesn't know what happened, he has no excuses. He is not a fan of goalies that play out of their creases.

Buddies with Auston Matthews & other hockey players. It is the game. He would run almost everybody... except Brady for a lot of reasons, one of them being Brady would take him down. Lols.

Olympics & World's etc - a shame that they can't play together. It is sad. His first dream is to win a Stanley Cup, and then to win for the US with his brother.

Right now - being down in Florida outside; jetskis etc. Not going to buy a boat. Love hanging out with his family and friends. He used to not like the beach at all, but now he is there all the time. He is not into nice cars. Only into golf and stuff on the waters. No gators close to his house, they are close to the rink (wtf).

Him changing team - talked to Calgary that he wasn't gonna sign a long-term contract, worked together with the team, and with permission he had one week to talk to a handful of teams. Came down to Carolina, St Louis' and Florida. He just wanted to learn everything he could before he made the decision.

Going back to Florida in a few days.

Taryn is doing great, was injured last year/season and when she came back she was great.

Invited to 6 weddings, attended 4.

Jack Eichel - his hit. Haven't seen the video.

Fav goal in the playoffs - when Cousins scores. The Carolina one.

Barky is so chill, he thinks Barky is the best player he ever played with/seen. Loves watching Barky playing, during training he learns from him.

Scoring between his legs, his dad was pissed. LOLs. He used to do a lot of trick stuff, flipping his picks etc. He remembers watching Kane and Crosby doing it when he was growing up.

He will chat with his dad after games, and nowadays his dad trusts him.

He thinks Brady is great, a great scorer. Brady's goal is to get the team into the playoffs. Ottawa loves Brady, he is a god there. They treat him and his family well bcos of Brady.

His parents come to Taryn, Brady and his games etc.

It is fascinating to me that Matthew is so very much, "I did this", 'it is my fault", "we didn't play well enough", "the other team is better" etc.

I typed this as I was listening to this so there will be mistakes. LOLs.

#matthew tkachuk #I love this Ratboy!#Self aware Ratboy #Youtube #long post

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ashthemadwriter-archived · 2 years

Text

"Do you need to use your safe word, Darling?"

"You look so pretty with my dick inside you, princess"

Fandom: Death Note

Pairings: Mello X Fem!Reader

Request: "Hello!! Can I request prompt “Do you need to use your safe word, darling?” With Mello pls?🤭" " I have spawned in here to request prompt 12 with mello😼" ◜By two lovely anons!◞

Genre: Smut

Format: Short Fic

Warnings: Explicit smut, Cussing, Brat taming, Sub!Reader, Dom!Mello, Pet names (Darling, Slut, Princess, etc), Degrading, Dirty talk, Mello being a tease, Vaginal sex, Oral (Giving), Rough sex, Mating press position, FILTH overall, MDNI

Word Count: 1.6K

A/n: Both of you didn't mention anything about reader's gender so I went with Female reader, and I also combined both requests, hope that's ok :)

When you thought about testing Mello, this wasn't exactly what you were thinking.

It was supposed to be a stupid joke, a sarcastic one you would say; but still, a joke. When he came home today, exhausted and out of breath, he wasn't expecting you to give him shit about it. Sure; it was nearly 4 am but, so what? You're not his mom alright? He never had one actually, which was probably the reason why he was so on guarded when discussing this matter.

He wasn't used to people actually caring about him.

"I don't fucking understand! Why the fuck are you arguing with me?" Mello hissed, taking the last bite of his caramel flavored chocolate as he stared into your eyes. The click sounds of the chocolate being destroyed by his teeth kinda distracted you, but it was also turning you on at the same time.

Not that you were going to admit it. Definitely not at this moment.

"Because you're not supposed to stay outside wandering in the streets while I'm here worried sick; dying to get a reply from you!"

"Why not?! I'm a fucking adult now! I waited all these years to turn 18 and get out of that orphanage, I won't let you control me and tell me what to do!"

God this was so stupid! You had enough of this! You loved this jackass! It was enough that you knew he was about to die any moment due to him working on the Kira case, but this? It was too much.

Too much for a normal girl like you.

"You know what? I wanna break up" you blurted out, without thinking about how many times you brought the topic up. Mello simply rolled his eyes at your words, thinking how long is it gonna take for you to find out that you are never getting away from him.

"Oh? Why is it this time?"

"This time? Oh! It's actually for the same reason! You, Mello! I love you too much! Too much that I can't stand this! This is... hard for me! You're always outside, you never give me any attention; You're not even capable of satisfying me in bed!"

Oops.

"What?" His carefree tune was replaced with a harsh one, and his sharp gaze fixated on you was a manifest sign, implying to take your words back, but today you felt a bit perkier than usual, so you decided to put yourself on a knife-edge.

"What? You've gone deaf or something?" you said bluntly, but not enough to stop yourself from avoiding his stare. You knew you didn't mean any of these, but maybe you were being too easy on him, always leaving the conversation undone because he was too tired or had work to do.

"The bedroom. Now"

This tune. This serious tune of his was something you were craving for ages. It reminded you of your first hook up together when you met in a bar. How he fucked you like the good girl you were, doming you until you were sobbing for him to let you come. That night was...crazy; and seemed like tonight was going to be similar to that, or even crazier.

You nodded with obedience, heading to the bedroom as your legs trembled with excitement. It had been a while since you two had sex and this looked like a good start; right?

"Kneel" He ordered you, caressing your bottom lip as you obeyed him docilely. His thump slowly rubbed the sensitive skin, pushing them open to make room for his digit to slip inside your wet mouth.

"Good girl. I like it when you're this obedient" The grin on his face was sending shivers down your spin, releasing all the negative thoughts you were surrounded with earlier that day. He was fine, he looked fine; maybe you were a bit overreacting.

And maybe you crossed one important line of his.

"But sometimes... Sometimes you seem to forget your place" his thumb slowly exited your mouth. "But no worries for that, doll. I mean, that's why I'm here right? To remind you where you belong to"

If it was any other day you would've talked back to him, but tonight he just looked so majestic as you were watching him from below that you couldn't bring yourself to mutter a word.

Watching you looking at him with lust in your eyes, Mello just knew that your head was already filled with dirty fantasies of him bending you on his lap leaving hand prints on your skin, and maybe he was willing to make those dreams come true, but first he had other plans on his mind.

"Say, how about we have a challenge? Let's see who can last longer in this game, hm? You in?"

Well, how could you say no to this tempting offer?

Seeing the sign of approval on your face, Mello reached for his belt to get rid of all the clothes keeping you from having access to his big cock. You knew what he was after, so you lent him a hand by unzipping his pants and pulling them down to meet a erected dick hanging out in front of you, ready to feel your mouth around it.

Turning your look back to Mello, you started lightly stroking his dick with your warm hand, causing him to take a heavy breath and watch you with hidden desperation in his eyes. A small grin found its way to your lips before they crashed on his dick, making him lightly pant at the sudden arrival of pleasure. Your blowjobs were always a nice treat, so you wouldn't really blame him if he came after a while; right?

Or that's just what you were thinking at the moment.

Without wasting a second, you started bobbing your head back and forth on his length, with an unbelievably fast pace like you're life depended on it. You could already taste his precum leaking from the tip of his dick, which was definitely a good sign, and so were his grip on your hair. His sex was so warm yet so big to enjoy the taste of him on your tongue, but unlike you, he was definitely enjoying himself; you could tell that from how hard he was trying to hold back his moans. But as you thought he was about to fall apart, He suddenly pulled your hair back.

"Mhm- Ouch!" You whined, leaving his dick from your mouth while massaging the pain away on your scalp. Your eyes were on him and that stupid smug face of his, knowing that he wasn't going to give you the satisfaction of winning.

"You think you can make me come? How bald" He grinned as he grabbed your upper arm, lightly pulling you upwards. He didn't want to hurt you, he was still in love with you after all; but you could take just one rough night, couldn't you?

The second you stood in front of him, he pushed you toward the bed, making you gasp with surprise as his body crashed on top of you. Now it was you who was panting for breath, while trying to hide your lewdness for his touch. The eye contact between you became tense when his hand started rubbing your clit gently, satisfied with how wet you were already even though he hadn't properly touched you yet.

"Look at you! Looks like you were enjoying that blowjob more than me! Or, is it just because you're a needy slut for my cock, huh?"

Maybe you could answer him, if your mind wasn't clogged with his virility over you.

He poked your lips lightly, smirking at how needy your throbbing cunt was for him. "Well, I can't turn down my pretty girlfriend after all, hm? Even if she acts like a bitch sometimes"

Pressing your knees on your stomach, he placed your hands on your thighs, kissing the soft skin as you felt his tip on your entrance.

And that was when it hit you. You could never win, never against him, because he was the one who had power over you, he only hadn't bother to show you that until now.

In this small game of filth, you were the loser; and even though you didn't want to admit it, you were perfectly fine with that.

"Mhm- mh- A- A- Ah- Ahhhh!"

There it was, the sudden feeling of your body burning underneath his sweaty skin, shooting drops of cum landing on his cock, creaming around him. How many times you had come already? You lost track of it after the third time, because your mind and your body was too numb to process what was happening around except for how his length was thrusting into you, hitting that sensitive spot inside. Was he protesting? Not at all, it was just making it easier for him to shove himself inside your slippery cunt, earning endless needy moans or perhaps inarticulate mutters from you.

"You look so pretty with my dick inside you, princess" He whispered next to your ear, sending shivers down your quivery spin. Of course he was having fun. He was having his way with you, humiliating your crave for his dick and how you were still too haughty to give up.

"You're trembling under me baby. I bet you won't be able to walk tomorrow. Are you sure you can take one more? Do you need to use your safe word, Darling?"

What was the point of him asking? You couldn't even respond to him because you were too busy devouring euphoria coming from his sex with your aching pussy. One thing came to your mind as your eyes rolled back with pleasure, getting the feeling of the arrival of your next climax;

That he was going to have you screaming both his name and your safe word, not so long afterwards.

Reblogs are much appreciated!

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loser-fics · 1 year

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Hi there!

Could you please do a Carl Grimes x fem!reader angst to fluff that takes place during beginning of season 6? Carl and the reader are a couple and super close. Ron likes the reader and is jealous of their relationship. Ron also wants revenge for his father’s death so he kidnaps Carl knocking him out and taking him outside beyond Alexandria. The reader finds a letter Ron left telling her he took Carl. Reader goes over the walls and tracks Ron and Carl and finds where they are. Ron threatens Carl and is about to kill him when the reader shows up just in time. Her and Ron fight with her winning the fight. She then frees Carl and once Carl is free a swarm of walkers start coming. Ron tries to escape but is surrounded and killed by the walkers. The reader and Carl escape the herd just in time and return to Alexandria. Carl kisses the reader all emotional while holding her not wanting to let go telling her he was afraid he’d never see her again and that Ron was going to hurt her. Reader and Carl then have a cozy night in cuddling with each other by the fireplace. Thank you!

TW: regular walking dead violence, swearing, my bad late night humour

You and Carl were walking around Alexandria together, hand in hand. It was rare to see the two of you apart, even before you got together. Everyone thought it was sweet, a young couple having fun… everyone but Ron. He longed for it to be him holding your hand, kissing you, spending every second he could with you. It drove him crazier each day, he would do anything to be with you, even if it was completely immoral. It took him a while, but he’d made a makeshift plan based off Carl’s rather loose schedule, and the rare times he would be alone. A plan that would take Carl away and (hopefully) leave you to himself.

It happened that night. When Carl was walking back to his house, and Ron had taken a crowbar.

“Wha-“ was all Carl got out before Ron hit him over the head with it, knocking him out. With slight difficulty, Ron then took him past the Alexandria gates.

You woke up the next day, blinking a few times before noticing something on your bedside table.

A Letter.

You lazily took hold of it and opened it.

Y/N, Carl does not deserve you, nor your love or your embrace. But not to worry sweetheart, I’m taking care of it, - Ron <3

You wondered what he meant for a second, was this is prank? Is this real? A dream? And ‘taking care of it’? Is he gonna-? And that’s when you knew. You could only hope that Ron hadn’t really gone and done something that stupid, and that your boyfriend was alive.

You quickly got dressed and grabbed your knife, running out your house and immediately looking around. Daryl had taught you some tracking skills in the past and with Ron’s lack of kidnapping skills it was easier to locate them. You spotted a slight gap in the walls and pushed it a part a little more, going through before closing it back up. You looked down ahead of you to see some vague footprints, and followed them as well as you could.

Eventually you came across a barely intact shed, and heard the yelling from inside it.

“YOU SON OF A BITCH WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU DO THIS”

“YOU DON’T FUCKING DESERVE HER, COWBOY, I DO”

“THEN WHY DIDN’T YOU KILL ME RIGHT WHEN I WAS OUT OF IT”

“Oh Carl, I wanted to just tell you exactly what’s gonna happen after you die-“

And that’s when you walked in, knife in hand, anger on your mind. Carl was currently badly tied to a chair, enough for him to not get away but again still Ron’s skills aren’t really the best.

“Y/N?!” The two boys said, Carl’s tone being relieved while Ron’s being more annoyed? confused? Probably both.

“LET HIM GO YOU FUCKING PSYCHO” you yelled at Ron, who was rather surprised to see you here.

Before Ron could actually give you a response you ran up to him, punching him. You were tempted to use your knife but he hit you back snapping you out of thought. Luckily, a couple more hits from you and he backed against the wall breathing heavily. It was rather easy for you to take him down what with him living inside Alexandria for the majority of the apocalypse and you wondered for a second how this boy kidnapped Carl Fucking Grimes.

You used your knife to cut Carl free and the two of you ran out the door a swarm of walkers came near you and as you darted away they went through the door. Hearing Ron’s screams you could assume what happened as you and Carl went back to Alexandria.

“What. The. Hell. Happened.” Rick said as he looked at the two of you who were covered in blood and dirt.

“We could find either of you all morning… where you two with Ron? He’s also missing” Michonne spoke, sounding slightly more understanding than Mr ‘Coral and (your name in rick’s accent) can’t be trusted’

After some explaining, some bad news delivering and some wall fixing, Carl and you could finally relax. The two of you cuddled on the couch listening to the fireplace crackle.

“I was scared back there y’know, not just for me I thought- I thought Ron was gonna hurt you or that I’d never see you again…” Carl said, pulling you closer and tracing shapes on your back

“I know, I I know, but it’s ok now don’t worry sweetheart” you responded

“… I love you.”

“I love you too Carl, so fucking much”

———————————————————

A/N: I am SO SORRY with how long this took to get out and it was kinda hard to write Ron so evily haha

#carl grimes x reader #carl grimes #carl grimes imagine #the walking dead imagine #ron anderson #rick has an angry dad look #and michonne has to calm him down #poor you and carl

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