I love when people hit me with the "well how would you feel if people wrote rpf about YOU?" argument because its like. Oh baby. You're asking the wrong fucking one 😂

okay can you guys seriously leave mentally ill people alone? like, for real?

i cannot tell you the number of times ive seen an anonymous person go into someone's inbox and say some shit like "hey so you said you have bpd and i dont have anything against people with bpd but my ex had bpd and constantly manipulated and emotionally abused me, am i valid for hating her?" like. good fucking god.

first of all, random tumblr users are NOT your therapists. you shouldnt be going into ANYONE'S inbox and traumadumping without permission, regardless of who they are or what you're asking them.

second, seriously? like..... seriously? you think that's okay?

imagine going into a queer person's inbox like "hey so you said you're queer and i dont have anything against queer people but i was bullied by a gay person in high school so is it valid if i hate them? nothing against queer people btw i just have bad associations <3" like WHY are you making that somebody else's problem.

i dont care if your abusive ex had bpd, i dont care if your abusive father had npd, i dont care if your shitty ex friend had aspd. you do NOT get to traumadump that onto another mentally ill person who is NOT YOUR FUCKING THERAPIST. how on earth do you think that is okay. it does not matter what your ex with bpd did to you, you do not get to make that another person with bpd's problem.

quit further pushing the idea that ALL people with x disorder are abusive. we are already mistreated enough just for having stigmatized disorders, we do not have to deal with the additional pressure of having to reassure YOU that not all people with x disorder are bad. take that up with a therapist or with someone who has GIVEN YOU PERMISSION to vent to them about it. do not bring that shit into a random stranger's inbox.

like. im sorry you went through that, and it sucks, but the way that you people feel like mentally ill people are obligated to be your teachers or your therapists is ridiculous. we aren't here to make you feel better about yourselves. please, leave us alone.

this is free to reblog but do not use this post to traumadump about how someone with x disorder hurt you and how you use that as an excuse to hold a bias against mentally ill people, i don't wanna hear it.

[ ID: A blue banner that reads, "People without stigmatized disorders do NOT clown on this post." On either end is a clown emoji with a red X over it. End ID. ]

What are these tactics that make people stay in your life and focus on you instead of others? If you're comfortable sharing?

My most complicated but effective tactic is to create a conflict going on within your life that isn't real or dramatizing one that you don't really care about. Like you're mourning for the loss of a relative or friend, struggling with an addiction that brings you harm, or honestly anything you can use to make yourself seem vulnerable. Afterwards, you tell your desired person only snippets of this story (to avoid the accusation of traumadumping) and either request their support, or allow them to offer it (assuming they're an empathetic person). Make sure you thank them and make your gratitude seem genuine as you take advantage of this support they have now promised to give you. It'd also make sense to make up a line triggers to throw in any scenario as a precaution. (I.e, say you and your desired person are in a situation where their attention is being drawn away from you. Gently tell them you are feeling triggered/reminded of something occurring within your made-up conflict in order to get them focused back on you.) But overall, don't make it obvious that you are lying. Keep the story simple and easy to retell as well as believable events that follow afterwards to keep it flowing. Other ways are as simple as the following; - Telling them that their kindness is being taken advantage of by the people that often engage with them. - Telling them that their friends make you feel unwanted and alienated. - Plan copious amounts of activities to get more time with them. - Kidnap them and give them Stockholm Syndrome lol If I can think of more tactics maybe I'll make a second part, unless elaboration is required on my alternatives.