#and i mean that ltr and not as a joke
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DADDY'S HOME —— kim mingyu
in which your husband comes home late on valentines. but it's okay, he has his ways of making it up to you.
warnings ☆ MATURE CONTENT AHEAD. smut, husband!mingyu, somno, gyu is pussy whipped, kim mingyu x afab!reader
i get off work late today :/
c u ltr, ok?
You frown at the texts, irritability rubbing your thumb against your temples.
This is not the first time your husband has texted you that he’d be late from work, oh of course not. You understand—-sometimes, his schedule is tight and that makes work the temporary number one priority. You obviously mean more to Mingyu than his paycheck.
Or so you thought. You groan, flopping back onto the couch miserably. Mingyu has come late at night at least twice a week for the past month now, so it should be a normal occurrence. At least, if tonight wasn’t Valentine's.
Yes, today was the commercial holiday that pisses about off half the world. And funnily enough, Mingyu had only sworn to you three major things in his life. One, good dick. Two loving you. And three, that he’d never miss Valentine's day.
While the last one was mostly a long inside joke from before you got married, you’re still glancing worriedly at the clock. 9:30 and you’re still holed up alone in your apartment, a box of chocolates with his name on it set on top of the kitchen table.
Mingyu hadn’t promised you a dinner date at a restaurant tonight —you both knew that wouldn't fit with his schedule. But he had promised to cook you something romantic, pour you a glass of wine, and then fuck you till you see stars.
And being very honest, you think you would’ve loved that much more than a night out. Loved it so much, by the way you’re sneaking your hand into your panties. Pushing one, two fingers in; but it's never good enough—it'll never be Mingyu.
So you quit early, stand up because you're tired of waiting around. He’ll be home tomorrow. You can wash up now, clean up and see him later. It’ll be fine. You can celebrate then, right?
★ . *- .
Mingyu didn’t think he’d be making up Valentines like this. When he thought about it on the way home, he had pictured at dinner out at your favorite restaurant, or flowers and an even bigger gift basket than the ones he had already bought for you.
But, you didn’t hear the crack of the door, or the creek of the apartment floors when he walked in. You didn’t even hear when the loud thunk! when his work bag hit the floor. Or when he sets down the heart shaped pendant Joshua had picked out on top of a pink gift basket he had planned to give you much earlier.
He realized then, that you would not be waking up for a while. You were tired, basically passed out. He does feel bad for making you wait so long, but shit, he swears his cock never throbbed as hard as it did when he caught the sight of your sleeping figure curled up in bed. Only in a small tee and new pair of panties he got you a couple of weeks ago. Fuck, you look perfect.
So he went, took a shower and got dressed before laying next to you in bed. You murmur something when his arm wraps around you, snuggling into him. But you don’t wake up.
“Pretty,” he mumbles, slowly running his thumb over the skin of your cheek. He pokes you a couple of times with a finger. You look so cute—eyes shut with your mouth partially open. You might’ve been drooling even.
His hand dips down to your torso, rests on your hip. He was nearly starting to fall asleep too, blinking in a poor attempt to keep himself up too. And right then, you just had to shuffle, pushing back against him. A small noise slips past his lips when the curve of your ass pressed against his clothed, semi-hard cock.
Poor Gyu, stuck in bed while you’re sound asleep. How’s he supposed to take care of that? He feels his cock twitch again, grip on your hip tightening just barely.
It wouldn’t be a problem if he just helped himself, right? Inhaling, his hand moves a bit further, hooking around the bottom of your panties. He prods against the warmth of your entrance pushing a finger in.
Fuck, you’re so wet. He can hear the sound of your slick when he presses another finger inside. It’s almost as if your cunt is begging for him to fuck you. And it’s only right that what his lovely wife and her pretty cunt wants, they get.
Mingyu pulls his fingers out, sucks on it. Moving slowly, he climbs until he’s hovering over your still figure. There’s a tight feeling in his core, dick hard as pulls the crotch of your panties to the side. He pulls the waistband of his sweats down, groaning when cold air hits his cock. He spreads your legs a little wider, teases himself against your pussy.
Mingyu sees Heaven when the tip slips past your entrance. Swears he could cum on the spot. You’re so warm, so soft. It’s not his fault, you’re the one who lured him into this trap.
He can do a little more than the tip. You haven’t moved yet, still partially twisted one way with your legs spread wide for him. You were just made to take his cock, weren’t you?
He should have been making up Valentines with a picnic date in the park. Should have been thinking about what he’ll cook you for breakfast tomorrow morning, if he’ll deliver it to you with a card and a rose.
Instead, he’s got you trapped under him on the mattress, seemingly so passive and docile as you sleep, not conscious of the fact that he’s got you stuffed with his fat cock. He wonders if you’re dreaming about it now. You’re not necessarily a deep sleeper, so he’s surprised you don’t wake up when he bottoms out.
He doesn’t know what to say, can’t even speak. You feel so good, too good. Cunt wrapped around him, clenching. He’d kiss you if you were awake right now, but you’re not so he’ll settle with what he has. He fucks a soft thrust into you, watching for your reaction. Your breath catches, but you don’t do more than that.
“Perfect. You’re just perfect, baby.” He groans, pulling out until the tip before he forces himself back in. You let out a moan, arching so slightly. Mingyu thumbs your nipple through your shirt, speeding up the pace of his strokes.
He dips his head to press a kiss to your sternum, lips skimming and peppering kisses along your collarbone next.
You twist just barely under his hold, eyes fluttering open. You’re still coming to, blurry eyes barely making out the sight of Mingyu’s body caging over you. Whining, you bite your down on your lip when you feel the stupidly fat cock slowly fucking into your cunt.
“Hey baby,” Mingyu murmurs, now kissing the side of your neck. Your whimpers get louder, and you move one arm and snake your it over his shoulder. He groans when you clench on him, sucking harder on your skin. “Don’t worry baby, daddy’s home.”
Tiredly, you rub your eyes with your free hand. There’s pleasure building in your stomach rapidly, and you start to force yourself to sink deeper onto his cock. “Gyu– daddy, please.” You cry, fucking back on him.
You hear him hum in response, but you can’t answer. Not when he’s picking up the pace of his strokes, pushing hard, deep thrusts into your tight cunt. “Yeah baby? Come on, tell daddy what you need.” He teases, pushing your legs back before moving to grope your ass cheeks with his big hands.
Now that you’re awake, Mingyu tightens his grip, fucking into you harder. “Need Daddy to help you cum, hm?” He says, voice playful. As if he wasn’t the one whimpering and fucking himself into your pussy moments ago.
“Couldn’t help it, you looked so good.” He murmurs. His hips are starting to buck into your sloppily, You mewl, nodding. Pretty sure you might even be drooling but you couldn’t give a fuck. Everything feels too good, and you’ve got no idea what’s going on. Mingyu says something you can’t hear, kisses along your jawline before he presses his lips to yours.
You can barely make out the “Happy Valentines.” he whispers, cumming too hard. Your cunt clenching around his dick, mouth falling open. He wants to spit in it, call you a slut, but he can’t when he feels you pulse around his cock.
Gyu’s eyes roll back, and he lets out a low hiss, warm cum filling up your cunt. His body flops over yours, sweaty chest pressing to the front of your shirt. You run a hand through his hair, kiss his nape softly. “Someones late,” you joke, voice breathy.
“I know. ‘M sorry.” he says, moving down so that his head lies on your chest. He loves the feeling of you tugging on his hair slightly, ruffling his hair.
He looks up suddenly, disheveled but handsome as ever. “I’ll make it up. Wine and spa?”
You laugh, seeing the way he pouts. He looks like a giant puppy, cuddled up into you. You love it, love it so much you’re not even remotely bothered by the mess on cum or the fact that he still hasn’t pulled out. Pushing his hair back with a hand, you kiss him on the forehead once more. “Sure. Happy Valentines.”
didn't realize that even tho it's still valentines in my country, it's late in other places :( happy valentines! not beta read
#LMAOOO THE DADDYS HOME LINE#kpop hard thoughts#kpop hard hours#seventeen x reader#seventeen smut#seventeen fanfic#mingyu x reader#mingyu smut#kim mingyu x reader#kim mingyu smut#kpop smut
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Reasons Tommy/Buck&Tommy aren’t going away (yet);
- The 911 insta followed Lou, and they only follow mains and people who are reoccurring (and reoccur a lot)
- They also have posted two BuckTommy posts recently, showcasing them as an official couple of the show
-Both the things above have happened in the past week, whilst they’re filming ep 8 and finishing writing 9&10 which to me suggests Tommy will be in at least one of those eps.
- Tim keeps calling it a love story and a romcom, I highly doubt he’d end that after three and a bit eps. Especially after how it’s been built up.
-Oliver said that Buck and Tommy have some getting to know each other but he also said him and Lou do too. That they need to build these relationships- doesn’t sound like it’s going anytime soon.
- Lou said he was pitched an initial arc, which is normally 4 eps, but that doesn’t mean the arc can’t be extended. Especially when the reception is as good as it has been- and also they needed the wiggle room incase it was received poorly.
- Oliver also said he’d like Tommy to stay around, regardless of what happens but also said he’d like to continue their story in a similar thread to Tarlos.
-Tim and Oliver talk a lot about getting Buck off the hamster wheel, and I think him staying in a LTR would be the final part of that. Otherwise he’s still kind of on it, where he gets in and out of relationships without settling for a bit.
-This one is half joking, but Lou keeps mentioning the fact 9-1-1 has a s8 totally unprovoked 😂
#BuckTommy#just to reassure those who think Tommy will be gone too soon#I mean personally I’m not fussed if he stays forver lol#but yeah I think he’s here for longer and so is there relationship#also stuff he says in the cameos if you read i between the lines#like it’s hard fo fully tell cuz he kinda contradicts himself but I’m pretty confident#and if I’m wrong? well I’m wrong lol#Leah rambles
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what if nerd momo x bimbo reader author I need u
failing maths, but getting the girl
synopsis: momo and y/n have hated each other ever since an incident in first year. now, y/n's failing a class and momo offers to help.
warnings: mentions of blood and cuts, overbearing parents, drugs, implied sex
w/c: 4.0k
a/n: this is kinda funny for me bcs im blonde and my dad keeps making jokes in chinese about how im ltr a blonde bimbo now. anyway i combined these 2 reqs bcs im lazy forgive me anon/s
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"y/n!"
you turn in the corridor, almost crashing into the burly man behind you who yells a "watch where you're going blondie!" before rushing off to a class he was probably late to.
you spot your friends who had called you, grinning and waving you over, "can't go one day on campus without running someone down can you?" a friend teases.
you pout, "i didn't walk into anyone yesterday!"
"no but you got stuck in the revolving door outside the chem building."
you whine at their teasing, you were a naturally clumsy person! sometimes you'd mix up salt and sugar, and sometimes you'd lose your car keys only to find them still in the ignition keyhole of your car from the last time you used it.
"so you coming to that party tonight? i heard some famous dj from the states is playing."
"awwh really?! i can't tonight i'm failing that dumb math class i have to take and i have a quiz tomorrow so i gotta study."
"you're failing everything y/n, what difference would one night make for you anyway?" a scoff from a student passing by, who you recognise as the infamous hirai momo from the back of her head and the evil way she sends a side-eye at you and your friend group in disgust.
"i wouldn't be if it weren't for your sad ass hirai!"
"stop looking at my ass and get your eyes on some books for once."
momo was meant to be your roommate in first year. although you had accidentally locked her out in the rain for 5 hours while you were hooking up with someone you can't remember the name of anymore. that was during orientation week, safe to say she was pissed and completely drenched when you finally let her in. she filed for a roommate change not long after, citing "poor etiquette and stupidity that could infect my genius", and being the university's most promising academic scholar, she pretty much got whatever she wanted. meaning she also got you assigned to the harshest tutors and markers as her own form of personal revenge, essentially making you fail most of your first year courses. which is why you were even taking this math class again.
the problem arose however, when you find out you would actually lose your scholarship if you failed another class. so failing was definitely not an option.
⋆｡°✎ᝰ ˎˊ˗
“you failed.”
“what!? but i studied all night! i even brought the right calculator model this time!”
“miss l/n, bringing the correct calculator doesn’t help you if you don’t know how to use it. and neither does studying all night if you haven’t been coming to class for most of the semester.”
you’re gaping at the professor in disbelief.
“i’m afraid you’ll lose your scholarship if you fail the upcoming final exam. take this as your final warning. good day miss l/n.”
the door is shut in your face while you're still left trying to process exactly what just happened, mouth opening and closing like a goldfish.
a familiar scoff behind you brings you back though, "what is y/n l/n doing here outside the staff meeting room? what? about to blow one of your professors for marks or something?"
you spin, stepping into her space, faces inches away from each other, "you jealous or something hirai? i'll blow you too if you beg."
you revel in the way her cheeks immediately flush, a slightly shaky finger pushing up the glasses on her nose as she looks away, "jokes on you l/n. i don't have a dick dimwit."
"you don't need one for me to make you feel good."
she's sputtering, moving around you quickly to escape, knocking on the staff door. you smirk, reveling in the slight win over her but immediately forgetting the feeling of triumph when you realise you're still fucked for your final in 2 weeks.
⋆｡°✎ᝰ ˎˊ˗
"y/n, you know i love you, but i cannot explain this again in any other way."
you groan, hands coming up to pull at your hair.
"but you got like a high affliction or something for this class last year! if you can't teach me i'm actually royally screwed, pleaseee?"
"it's high distinction sweetie. and just because someone's good at something doesn't mean they're a good teacher. sorry to break it to you but i couldn't teach my little cousins how to multiply fractions without wanting to commit homicide."
you wrinkle your nose, "gross dude they're literally related to you."
"no babes homicide means i wanted to kill them."
"oh... i guess that's better?"
"focus! c'mon you remember how to do the cross product right?"
"i don't get ittttttt!!!!!!! isn't that just multiplication? a times b equals ab!"
"this isn't algebra it's vectors. cross product isn't multiplication y/n."
you groan again, facepalming the desk in front of you.
your friend sighs, "sorry y/n i have to get going now. promised my boyfriend i'd go watch his game tonight."
"what?! you can't leave me here!"
your friend's already packing up their stuff though, "sorry! good luck with the studying though!"
you wail in goodbye, sitting up again and slapping your face a few times, trying to hype yourself up.
two minutes later, and you're still absolutely nowhere.
you decide to go out for a quick stroll rather than start a campfire in the middle of the library with all your papers. the evening breeze feels refreshing against your skin as you take in the sky. breathing in a deep sigh and closing your eyes briefly.
definitely the wrong idea when you crash headfirst into something that yelps a "what the fuck!" followed by the sound of smashing glass and a whine of pain.
your eyes are quick to open and you stare down at a bleeding hirai momo next to what looks to be a ruined 3D print of a final project or something.
"oh shit momo! are you okay?" you crouch down quickly, trying to collect the glass pieces that have broken, yelping when a piece digs into your skin.
"has all that bleach finally reached your brain y/n? who goes for broken glass with their bare hands?" she's frowning, rubbing her head a little and inspecting the cut across her arm.
"i-i'm sorry i-"
she sighs, "save it. i've had a long enough day as it is. being around you any longer is just gonna increase my chances of dying to some freak plane crash or something." she's standing up and brushing her hands off on her pants muttering to herself, "i'll have to call security to come clean this up."
you realise then that her eyes look a little puffier than usual, slightly tinged with red, the telltale signs of crying.
you suddenly feel terrible. whatever you had just broken seemed like an extremely intricate piece of work, and she was still bleeding down her arm but she didn't seem to pay it much mind, taking a phone out of her pocket and dialing security.
you step to the side and wait for her to finish talking on the phone. she doesn't realise you haven't left yet, swearing under her breath as she assess the damage once again.
when she turns and sees you again, she scowls, "what are you still doing here bimbo? don't you have a dick to ride or some jewelry to shine?"
you ignore her, blushing instead, "you're still bleeding."'
she looks surprised at that response, glancing at her arm again briefly and shrugging, "it's whatever. i'll clean it up later."
you wrap a hand around her wrist then, still not meeting her eyes, "let me? it'll be hard to bandage it properly with your left hand. and i kinda owe you for all of-" you gesture vaguely with your other hand at the ground, "this."
she's tugging her hand back quickly though, "don't bother. you'd probably make it worse. just go home y/n."
you sigh exasperatedly, "won't you just let me help! i feel bad okay? i can't just leave you here bleeding onto the concrete waiting for security to come clean this up."
she's surprised at your outburst, eyes locking onto yours and then nodding slightly. you don't let her rethink her decision as you drag her back inside the library, heading into the storeroom where you knew they had emergency first aid supplies.
you sit her down on the chair and rummage through the small kit for some alcohol wipes to clean the wound first.
she's eyeing you with a sort of caution, but is quick to clench her eyes shut and gasp at the first sting of disinfectant.
it's quiet for a bit while you work on cleaning her wound.
"where'd you learn first aid?" she speaks up first, eyes meting yours again.
"my little sister used to play around a lot with the rougher kids in the neighborhood. so she was always coming home with scratches and cuts and my mom was at work most of the time so i had to learn to take care of her myself."
momo hums, "guess that didn't really translate to taking care of yourself then huh? i mean with the way you're always tripping over air and stuff, you're more of a danger to yourself than a serial killer would be." there's no malice to her words this time, just lightly teasing you and you smile.
"i am sorry by the way. for breaking that. it looked like it'll be pretty hard to replicate."
"nah. i can just print another one tomorrow don't worry."
you both fall into silence again as you finish cleaning her wound, going to collect a few of the bandages to start wrapping around her arm.
you clear your throat a little awkwardly, "so... long day?"
she chuckles humorlessly in response, "something like that."
"wanna talk about it?"
she bristles then, and you're quick to correct yourself, "i mean you don't have to. just... making conversation."
it's quiet for a little longer and you're finishing wrapping her up, grabbing a small adhesive to stick it all together when she sighs. "sorry. just had a lot of pressure from back home lately. my parents keep wanting me to hurry up and graduate so i can go back to japan and take over the family companies. they called earlier saying how they're cutting off my funding for next year if i continue to drag out my studies."
"what? but you're only 23. don't you have like, things left you wanna do before you're all old and unable to move anymore?"
she giggles a little, its the first time you've heard that from her, "yeah tons actually. i've always wanted to see the northern lights and stay in one of those cute little igloos in finland, maybe go to antarctica and do some research there."
"okay! do that! what's stopping you?"
she smiles at you sadly, "my parents won't allow it. they'd disown me for not taking over their companies. and frankly, i'd be broke without them. i don't have the kind of money to keep living abroad like this if they were to stop supporting me."
you tilt your head a little in confusion, "can't you find a job?"
she's laughing then, a full, nose-scrunching laugh, "not with the classes i'm taking. i'd have to either take part-time study, which my parents would literally kill me for because it's 'embarassing' and would bring shame on our family name, or... never sleep again and take a night job or something."
you frown, sitting back on your heels.
"thanks for this by the way. you're still hurt though, do you want me to do you?"
"-and don't make a weird joke about that." she interrupts you before you can even open your mouth.
you pout, nodding a little as she laughs, and grabs the first aid box from you, gently placing your hand in her lap and cleaning your fingers.
you're caught by the way her eyebrows furrow a little in concentration, her teeth biting into her bottom lip slightly, and you can't help but think she looks cute.
you're brought quickly out of these alarming thoughts though, when she asks "how come you're in the library so late on a friday night anyway? never thought the day would come."
you groan, remembering the stack of math papers you have sitting on your desk, "i have to study for a math final coming next week. if i fail i lose my scholarship and i can't let my mom pay for any of this. she's already worked hard enough getting both my sister and me through school."
momo looks surprised at your admission, "oh. i'm sorry. i didn't know you were on scholarship."
you hum, "yeah most people don't assume it from looking at me." you tease a little, flipping your blonde hair over your shoulder and giving a little jingle of your bracelets.
"i'm not materialistic or anything but i enjoy having things that make me look nice y'know?"
she rolls her eyes, placing bandaids carefully onto your fingers.
"you don't need any of those things anyway."
you're caught again, unsure whether that was a compliment or some new way of torturing you.
she clears her throat, "all done."
you look at your hand, cutely littered with some winnie the pooh bandaids she must have found in the first aid kit.
you beam up at her, "thanks!"
she blushes a little and looks away from you, shyly rubbing the back of her neck, "hey look... i can help you study for that test next week if you want. don't want you losing your scholarship over something simple like that. plus i kinda helped go through all the first year math exams for some extra credit with the head of department."
you're shocked at first, and then jumping and squealing, bringing her up with you, "what?! you will?! oh my god thank you!!!!! holy shit oh my god i'm not gonna fail oh shit i'm-"
she's shooshing you in an instant though, a hand clamped over your mouth, eyes darting behind you, "y/n! we're still in a library!"
you grin when she lets you go, whispering loudly, "thank you!"
she's rolling her eyes and letting herself be dragged over to your table, praying that she didn't make the wrong decision deciding to help you.
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momo's standing outside your lecture theatre, waiting for your class to end. you texted her saying you were getting your final results back today so she decided to pop by and make sure everything was okay.
once students start exiting the class she slips in, walking towards the professor who's packing up her stuff..
"momo! good to see you here. although i'm a little surprised. i wasn't expecting you."
"hey professor kwon. i'm just here to-"
momo's attacked from the back, you're squealing as you latch onto her excitedly, waving a test paper in front of her face, "i passed! momo look i passed! with a 62!!!!! that's higher than i've ever gotten!!!!!"
"miss l/n. i didn't know you knew momo." professor kwon is looking you up and down with a little distaste but you ignore it, squeezing momo even tighter in thanks.
"y/n- stop- wait lemme see that-" she snatches the paper out of your hand and scans it, eyes lighting up when she confirms you did in fact pass.
"congratulations! all that hard work really paid off."
you're blushing, "couldn't have done it without you hirai. c'mon, come out with my friends and i tonight to celebrate!"
"o-oh i don't know about that y/n... i've got-"
"study yeah yeah you always do. but you've gotta relax every now and then you know?"
"miss l/n is right momo. you're the most hardworking student here you should give yourself a break every now and then."
you're nodding fiercely, "right right! thanks professor kim!"
she looks at you with a glare, "kwon. its professor kwon miss l/n."
you're nodding, waving her off shaking momo, "c'mon pleaseeeeeeee? i'll pay for everything. as a thanks for helping me. and i can afford it now too since i won't be losing my scholarship which is also thanks to you so..!"
momo's still uncertain, hand at the back of her neck again, a nervous tick you've picked up on.
"oh professor i just remembered!" you're switching back to your professor, excitement and attention everywhere, "you were looking for outstanding students to tutor next semester right? how about momo? she's the only reason i passed this final and trust me when i say i'm a pretty difficult student to teach."
"oh?" the professor looks towards momo who's eyes have widened, "i had actually planned on asking you regardless but seeing as you were very successful with miss l/n it's just even more proof that you'd be a great teacher. what do you say momo? it's paid decently and great on your academic and work transcripts as well..."
you're looking between your professor and momo with full eyes.
momo looks like she's about to reject the offer, you knew it was because her parents expected her to be back in japan next year but you stop her before she's able to say anything.
"momo! this is great! this is exactly what you need! a job while you're still at uni so you can study at any time but still get paid for it!"
"y/n..."
"it's okay momo. think about it and let me know if you're interested and you've got the job 100%. i've got to get going to my next class now but goodbye girls, congratulations miss l/n but i hope i won't be seeing you in my class next year."
"oh definitely not professor kim!" you wave enthusiastically, giggling at the way the professor sighs in defeat.
you look back at momo who still looks a little stunned.
"well? what do you think?" you ask her excitedly.
"i- i don't know... there's a lot to think about..."
you tilt your head to the side a little in confusion, a gesture momo was beginning to grow fond of.
"i can't just abandon my family y/n. it's a decision that will take me some time to go over." she smiles at you gently, you can't believe this was the same girl who used to call you mean words and intentionally pray on your downfall.
"mm okay. i don't really get it but as long as you're happy in the end it doesn't matter. now c'mon! you coming tonight or not?"
she sighs fondly, "yeah yeah just this once. and we better be home by 12!"
you're pulling her along again scoffing, "riiiiiiiiight 12pm maybe."
"y/n!"
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momo was most definitely out of her comfort zone. she mostly stuck to the bar, avoiding eye contact with people who tried to approach her. she quickly ordered another drink, hoping the alcohol could at least ease her nerves.
you were most definitely in your zone. you adored being able to dress up and let loose, especially when everyone else is so drunk you’re no longer the only person falling over themselves. you could laugh a little and have fun as well.
you could feel momo’s eyes on you and you ached to drag her out onto the dance floor and join you but she was adamant on staying by the bar when you had tried.
you’re not sure if it was the alcohol or maybe you were just attracted to her now after you’ve spent a whole week studying with her pretty much every minute of every day. but she looked good. you licked your lips as your eyes trailed down the slant of her jawline, her neck and clavicles outlined in the halter top she was sporting. your eyes politely moved past her chest but darted straight down to the abs that she apparently had hidden from the entire student body. how did she even have time to have abs when she always had her nose in a book or was in a lab conducting experiments?
you snap out of it when you realise said abs were moving closer to you for some reason, and suddenly she's all in your space, shoving someone behind you that you hadn't even realised was there in your momo-induced daze.
you turn to see a man with half his shirt unbuttoned and a look of surprise on his face. "the fuck dude?"
momo says nothing, reaching for your drink instead, sticking a finger in and swirling it around for 2 seconds before bringing it to her lips.
that was hot.
"rohypnol."
"what? what the fuck are you on about?" the guy is annoyed, drawing the attention of bystanders as they create a small circle around the three of you, you spot your friends in the crowd looking at you in confusion silently asking what's going on?
you can only shake your head, attention moving back to momo who's standing up straight, almost chest to chest with the guy now.
"rohypnol. a drug belonging to the benzodiazepine class of drugs that inhibits the central nervous system causing the user to experience extreme drowsiness and even blackout in some cases. it can also cause the user memory loss and brings the user to a higher state of intoxication in a rapid amount of time. it's street name is roofies."
the man is sputtering now, "w-what? what is this bullshit? what are you tryna say huh?"
"that you tried to roofie my friend here. do you want me to call the police? have them check this drink for traces of the drug?"
"what!? the fuck?!"
momo sighs, her eyes closing for a second, "is your vocabulary only limited to what? and the fuck? it's getting tiring talking to you."
he's gaping like a fish, the people surrounding you have called security over and they're tying his hands behind his back and he's left squirming against them, yelling more curses as momo stands stoically, watching him get taken away.
she sighs when he's out of sight and turns to you with a smile, "you should be more careful. you could've been hurt tonight."
you can't even think straight and the music is being turned back up, and momo looks so good, you can't help the way you're pulling her in by the waist and planting your lips on hers.
she makes a sound of surprise and is shocked for a second, but closes her eyes and returns the kiss, maneuvering you a little so she can place the spiked drink on a nearby table before her hand returns to you, one hand cupping your cheek, the other on your shoulder.
you're a little desperate when you claw at her abs that are now within touching distance, and she giggles into the kiss. you mutter a small shut up, reattaching your lips, feeling all the adrenaline of the night pumping through you as you mould yourself against her.
"god is it weird that- that kinda turned me on a little?" you're speaking between breaths, her lips swallowing up your words, not letting you catch a break.
she hums lightly against you, "which part?"
"the- when you were talking- about all those chemicals- and whatever-"
she breaks away from you then, an eyebrow arched and a hint of a smirk on her face, "you get off on me talking nerdy?"
you want to wipe that smirk off her face. "take me home and i'll show you what i get off on."
her eyes darken considerably, and she's tugging you towards the exit, grabbing the spiked drink and pouring it down the drain first to make sure no one drinks it. the little action of consideration even when you're both overwhelmed with lust just gets you more wet.
you send a quick text to your friends saying you had to leave early, and then you're in a cab, lips on each other's again, hands roaming and exploring every inch of available skin.
you suppose the one good thing out of that math exam was it bringing the two of you together at last.
#momo#hirai momo#twice momo#momo x reader#momo x f!reader#momo x fem!reader#twice x reader#twice x fem!reader#twice x f!reader#momo imagines#twice imagines#royaltozaki
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Hii can i request childe thoma and diluc with an s/o that has trouble communicating? Like s/o didnt have a good childhood growing up. So whenever they want to say "i love you" they do it through actions like giving gifts and hugs. Sorry if this was long! Have a nice day :)
hi friend! hopefully this was something along the lines of what you were looking for! (i tried lol)
"another day"
childe, thoma, diluc (seperate) x gn!reader
genre: fluff (??)
word count: 1k
tags: all characters are in a LTR with the reader, childe being serious (ikr what the heck), lowkey husband material thoma, diluc can't communicate fr but he tries
tw/cw: one mention of injury i think, talking about feelings, love languages, copious volumes of physical touch (sfw bc THIS IS NOT A HORNY BLOG)
a/n: i hope this is acceptable. also sorry i haven't posted in a hot minute, school is getting on my shit rn :((((( (it was very hard to find a name for this)
childe has always been able to tell that your love language was not words of affirmation. at first in your relationship, he felt a little weird about it, and constantly told you that you could talk to him if you needed to. he didn’t feel that you were hiding anything from him, more just thinking that you felt you couldn’t tell him things because of how often he was at work. childe is not the most serious person in the world, but he definitely wants to know how you’re feeling at the times when he isn’t joking around so much.
after he asks you about it, and you give a brief explanation of your feelings towards him, and perhaps why things are the way they are, he will slowly get better at reading you based on your actions. He finds acts of service absolutely endearing, like when he’s going to make his lunch for the following day at the bank, only to find you’ve already packed it for him, or when he’s sustained a small injury in battle and you tend to him.
he will come home from work early one day (he got sent home bc he kept daydreaming about you), only to find you arranging a bouquet of flowers for him. ribbons and greenery and flowers and a vase laid out on the living room floor, and you carefully putting each flower in place like it was the most delicate craft known to man, so concentrated that you didn’t hear him come in. he knocks gently on the door upon entering, as to not startle you…
“baby? what’s all this?”
“oh, nothing…”
“are these for me? how sweet!”
“no! i mean yes? i mean- i thought maybe-... do you not like them?”
“i love them, and i love you!”
he gently grabs your wrist to get you up from the floor, pulling you right into his arms and placing a gentle kiss on the top of your head.
thoma is very socially aware (?). since he spends so much time around people, he can easily tell how they’re feeling and what they're thinking, which is a skill he doesn’t really even notice himself having, or one that he notices himself using on you. he knows what you’re thinking sometimes before you even do! he realises that sometimes people need space to understand themselves and is more than happy to give that to you, and understands if you don’t give him words of affirmation. he’s pretty secure in his image of himself, so it’s easy for him to understand if you express your love in a different manner.
thoma is someone who has a LOT of love to give, but is so busy sometimes that when he has a super packed schedule for the day, he will condense all that care and compassion into a short space of time, be it the morning, when you’re eating together, or when you’re laying together in bed, slowly falling asleep. if you fall asleep before him, he will wrap his arms around you, and whisper about how he loves you before falling asleep himself.
he totally giggles when you’re cuddling him and touching or poking at his cheeks out of boredom, or running your hands through his hair. will just start cackling and not be able to stop, and suddenly you’ve both succumbed to laughter and are just melting in each others arms.
he has a routine of cooking dinner for you at least 3 times a week, and despite the fact that you tell him you will help he will insist that you don’t lift a finger. so you will sit on the bench in the kitchen and adore him. he’ll literally be rinsing rice and then turn back around and you suddenly hug him.
“so anyway i was thinking, if i cook the broth just a little bit le- oh? hello there. what’s this, hm? let me set this pot down first, sweetie.”
diluc has never been in a relationship before you, so at first he doesn’t notice the fact that you face difficulty with expressing your feelings towards him. he understands very well how you feel about him from the way you act, and hopes you notice his feelings towards you too. he doesn’t really like the idea of couples being all in each others faces too much, he honestly thinks its a little cringe and over the top. it's all about the little things with diluc, he's a simple man.
understands that you love him when you brush his hair for him, or put your arms around his waist when he gets home in the evening. he knows that this is how you express your affection for him, and he trusts you enough to let you do these things, whereas he would never let anyone else do this.
he’s not a very poetic person, so he finds it a little hard to find the words to explain how he feels about you. he will instead settle for small gestures to show his appreciation for you, and hopes you know how much you mean to him.
he knows how important communication is though, so despite the fact he knows you both might have problems with it, he tries his best to make sure you know how he feels about you. eventually he will probably approach you, speaking in a low, gentle tone in an attempt to initiate a very loving conversation about how you both feel. he doesn’t want to make you uncomfortable, and wants you to feel safe, so if you don’t want to talk about it he will give you a hug, assure you that it’s completely okay and say it can wait for another day.
#childe fluff#tartaglia x reader#tartaglia fluff#childe x reader#thoma#thoma x reader#thoma fluff#thoma x you#diluc x reader#diluc fluff#dilucatdeeznuts#diluc x you#genshin headcanons#genshin x reader#genshin fluff#gosh this is so many tags
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Who do we think The Black Dog is about? It could be Joe but that would go against the popular theory that both major Joe songs on TTPD are the track 5s on the main album and anthology.
Also the "you said I needed a brave man, then proceeded to play him until I believed it too" is VERY "the coward claimed he was a lion" and "you didn't measure up to any measure of a man" coded.
Also she seems to go easier on Joe in songs...so the whole bitter and scathing "I hope it's shitty in the black dog" sticks out like a sore thumb. But if it's Matty then why does the song reference a long term relationship with password sharing and old habits (if Taylor and Matty were mostly on and off).
What about the "six weeks of breathing clean air, I still miss the smoke" parallel with Daylight? TBD is my favorite off of TTPD but I can't for the life of me interpret who it's about.
idk! i go back and forth and generally land on the idea that, like other songs, joe being the cause and matty being the effect, mean they're both swirled together. i had a big brain thought about this that i'll explain what i mean at the end of this post. but first, here are my thoughts:
agree that the bitter scathing songs feel very matty-coded - but the thing is, she's clearly angry about joe, it's just more in the background. she's said in other songs that she was angry about joe wasting her youth, claiming he loved her but not showing it. it stands to reason she'd be in disbelief, and hurt, that he just... moved on, post break-up.
long-term relationship habits: tbh, i don't think location-sharing and showering together are a smoking gun for a ltr. you can easily do those things with someone you're down bad for, no matter how little time has passed. could go either way.
the starting line is, apparently, a matty thing?
i don't think "i still miss the smoke" is necessarily a daylight parallel. it could be! it bring to mind lavender haze, missing the "haze" that clouded your judgment, but it also harkens back to clean, and not wanting to fall into a harmful addiction again, which then leads me to, "one slip and falling back into the hedge maze" where you're lost and out of control. the hedge maze could be matty, but it could also be a habit of, idk, love ending.
the line that pops out to me at each listen is "all of those best laid plans" though - it reminds me so much of "my best laid plan, your sleight of hand" in hoax, and "i'm begging for you to take my hand, wreck my plans" in willow.
and "do you hate me?" feels like something you might wonder about an ex you left. but "was it hazing for a cruel fraternity" feels like the smallest man, was it a joke? a game? were you a spy? was it hazing?
but then you think about the meaning of the rest of the line: "was it hazing for a cruel fraternity? i pledged and i still mean it, old habits die screaming."
she pledged herself to the relationship, and maybe it was a sick joke. but imo this is also a broader statement: if love is a joke, i still pledged, i still believe(d) in it. if all these men played a trick on me, if i am cursed to be alone forever, i want to change the prophecy. which, again, leads me to the explanation that - if the top story is about matty, it's still about all those experiences, primarily joe, that brought her to that choice.
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It’s so funny to be lazily ambiguous with gender and sexuality in real life because most people are like oh that’s a butch lesbian. Because I am lazy. And because I only clear things up with vetted friends and literally do not care about pronouns and names and have had different names/pronouns in different circles etc. and they see my men’s attire and the fact that I haven’t binded (bound?) in years and my short hair has long grown out. And then they tell on themselves and their own lazy heuristics when I talk about liking a man that it either a) takes them visibly aback and they have to stumble over themselves to pretend they’re not shocked or b) straight up think I’m joking and continue to believe I’m a butch lesbian. And the craziest thing is other queer people like somehow often worse about this despite this sort of idea that they have of themselves that they don’t assume anyone’s gender/sexuality and that they don’t tie ideas of androgyny to a flat chest and that they do believe that pretty extreme gender fluidity can and does exist and that everyone’s experience with gender is unique. And then there’s all sorts of shit where if I don’t feel like explaining/justifying the fact that I feel my concept of identity and self shift at such a glacial pace that it’s not worth establishing a conventional nonbinary or transgender identity (that conforms to the accepted experience, timeline, and desired considerations) in public, beyond my trusted friends who are chill about deviant experiences within the queer norm, I’m just one of them theyfabs claiming to be queer for clout. Ugh anyways it’s crazy to be one of the few people on the planet who needs to occasionally come out as what may appear at the outset as straight. I’m literally not a lesbian and no one ever ever stops to think I might not be. But I’ve had so many profound experiences with women and within that sort of community that I do feel such a strong affinity there, and in an ideal world would love to be something like a he/him lesbian. But I’m not a lesbian. Because I like men!! Despite only ever having been with women!!! And it also is so funny to me that were I to enter into a relationship with a man I would be considered completely and entirely cishet despite my extensive experiences within the gay community and specifically the lesbian community. Who would accept me with open arms if I’d ended up permanently with one of the women I’ve been with!! But I remain steadfast in my convictions that I do not need to explain myself to anyone. And truly I do not care in the least what people assume about me, I’m a very private person for whom open identity is not important and I’m literally way too chill to care. But it’s just continuously funny to have to come out as not a lesbian. How many dozens of times have I had to be like “actually I am not a homosexual”. Literally the opposite experience of most LGBTeeeees I’ve just got that deeply intensely masculine swag for real that the effect lasts even when my hair gets down to like shoulder length. And it’s like, even though I am perceived as female, albeit a queer one, I have had literally every single one of the stereotypical experiences of the ‘knew I was transgender from early childhood’ archetype and that’s just supposed to be completely invalid because I decided not to medically transition due to the spans of time I have where my identity shifts and I know I’m not qualified to pick one of the three acceptable genders for the rest of my life? And I understand the broader community’s frustration with certain aspects of hegemony re: people whose identities are snidely referred to as “theyfabs” and bisexual women in LTRs with men HOWEVER im just so tiredddddddddddd of the condescension, and lazy heuristics I notice in queer people’s treatment of me and assumptions about me. Anyways thanks 2 the gay people in my phone for letting me be amorphous and being so so chill about it. I mean it probably helps that you can’t see my genuinely gargantuan and unbindable breasts from my posts. But christ man it’s just exhausting lol
#sorry. guess who just had to say the sentence ‘actually I’m not a lesbian! no worries though’ out loud for the 4000009th time#also#which is why if you’ve noticed me use every single term under the sun for myself it’s because ummmm I am like everything and nothing#and if you hate theyfabs and bisexuals then just unfollow me and let’s live in our separate worlds. life is too short to justify yourself#to everyone I’m straight up just chilling#like sorry my hair is long. is that hard for you to understand in your toddler’s conception of boys and girls#ok now back to ur regularly scheduled apathy and ignoring of all discourse infighting and identity gatekeeping lol
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Build Up Episode 1: If You and Every Moment
Welcome back to my project of recapping Build Up, the MNET show! In the previous one, we finished off the "voice check" mission, when the guys voted -- or didn't vote -- for each other. In this post, we'll tackle the judges panel as well as the first two performances: If You and Every Moment of You. Let's do this!
It's time for the performances already!
The judges are gathering. First in is Lee Seokhoon. You know, this guy.
He was the vocal coach on, among other shows, PD101 and Boys Planet. I have tried and tried over the course of this recap to remember his name but I cannot, and my scrolling finger was getting tired, so I will be calling him That Guy or That Vocal Coach Guy or something throughout and you’re just going to have to make your peace with that.
Then Wendy from Red Velvet and Baekho arrive. I’ve never seen Wendy on a show like this before, which checks out, because she says it’s her first time. And OMG. Baehko? Main vocal of Nu’est? The guy I bring up randomly in recaps that have nothing whatsoever to do with him, on the slightest pretense? I genuinely didn’t know he’d be a judge on this, but it sure sweetens the pot. I hope we get to hear him singing!
Baekho jokes that he feels like he should be on stage performing, because That Guy is here. The joke is that Baekho was on PD101 Season 2, when That Guy was a judge/trainer. Baekho actually won PD101 Season 2 based on the real votes, and should have been in Wanna One, but MNET rigged it and gave his spot to someone else.
I’m really surprised that Baekho would want to deal with MNET again after all that, but I guess this show has a different staff and showrunner.
Baekho and Wendy talk about how it’s their first time doing a show like this, and Wendy says she’s so nervous. She sounds really nervous. It’s one of the first times I’ve ever seen Wendy not smiling.
Eunkwang from BtoB arrives (if you don’t know BtoB, they’re with Cube and they’re known for their vocals), and Solar from Mamamoo. Finally, Jaehwan from Wanna One (he’s a soloist now) -- he’s the one who sang that part right before the chorus of Energetic, the part with the “no no no no!” His vocals are so gorgeous, my god. But also, I wonder if it’s weird for Jaehwan and Baekho to work together after being on PD101 together all those years ago…? Doesn’t seem to be -- they have a fun rapport.
Anyway, this judging panel is stacked.
LTR: Baekho from Nu’est, Solar from Mamamoo, That Guy, Eunkwang from BtoB, Wendy from Red Velvet, and Jaehwan from Wanna One
Dahee appears and introduces herself as the MC.
She looks really pretty. A long sleeved bedazzled denim tailored crop top paired with a matching denim mini skirt? I mean why not? Do your thing, Dahee. The judging panel applauds and shouts at her that she’s beautiful.
The camera reveals where the boys are sitting in a sort of green room area, and they are also shouting about Dahee. They’re now wearing the outfits they wore in their official photos. That will make it easier to recognize them from those photos, that’s for sure.
And looking at this, I realize, this is supposed to look like the coliseum. You guys. That’s why one of the boys said that the set looks like the coliseum as they were coming in, before the studio lights came up. Someone must have told him to say it. This is supposed to look like an ancient Roman gladiator ring or something. I wish it didn’t look so shitty, though.
Dahee says that the participants will get to experience the feeling of being in a 4 member group today, and that they be evaluated for their performance.
Wendy is super nervous. She might be even more nervous than the boys are. Come on, Wendy, my fellow North American. You got this! She’s wearing one of those three-quarter sleeve blazers. I feel like I should get one of those.
Dahee asks the judges what criteria they’ll be using. The judges reply with their criteria one by one, and the guys in the green room are seeing it on a closed circuit camera view and reacting to each judge. Apparently, this is the first time they are finding out even who the judges are, much less what the criteria is. Seems like maybe that info would have been helpful earlier, like maybe when the boys were rehearsing and planning….?
LTR: Bitsaeon from M.O.N.T, Ji Yeon Woo, Sunyoul from UP10TION, and Choi Su Hwan -- aka Team Decalcomanie.
The boys are excited to see the vocal coach guy, who they refer to as “that man with glasses.” I guess they also have trouble remembering his name. They’re also a bit intimidated by him -- he’s known for telling it like it is.
The guys are also especially delighted to see Eunkwang from BtoB.
To be clear, they’re also pretty surprised and happy to see all the judges, but my sense is that for most of them, Eunkwang takes top spot. He is often cited as a role model for young male kpop vocalists, in much the way that young female kpop vocalists would cite Taeyeon from SNSD.
Sunyoul, in his sparkly black jacket, pulls out a little notebook and starts taking notes of the criteria! Is Sunyoul low key the Woongki of Build Up? I think he might be, friends. I’m here for it. Not that anyone can replace THE Woongki, but it’s nice to have someone around who reminds us of him. So what must Sunyoul be writing down? Here’s the criteria we get:
The Vocal Coach Guy says that he’s going to be looking for the delivery of the lyrics and for them to do their own interpretation of the songs.
Eunkwang encourages them to have good teamwork on stage and to show their best performance with the chance they have.
Solar from Mamamoo tells them that, as a member of a 4-person vocal group herself, she’s looking for synergy.
Baekho says he’s looking to see that they distributed the parts correctly so that each member can shine.
Wendy tells them she’s also looking for lyric delivery and emotional expression.
Jaehwan starts to say that the others already gave good advice, and Eunkwang playfully interrupts to tell him to not say more in that case. Jaehwan goes on, undaunted, and encourages them to not let their nervousness get the best of them. They need their breath to sing!
And right away, it’s time for the first team to perform!
If You (originally by Big Bang)
The first team is doing “If You” by Big Bang, from 2015. Eunkwang says the song is really hard, and That Guy agrees. Shipji ana! It’s not easy. This song is not just something you can sing with a “nice tone.”
Who is taking the stage?
It’s Geonu from Just B, Jay, Kang Hayoon, and Hong Seongjun from BDC. They each introduce themselves.
Randomly, back in the green room, Seokhwa from WEi says he went to an academy with Geonu. See, all these guys travel in the same circles. One more reason it’s dumb to have fan wars -- you might be crapping on an idol who is best friends with your bias.
Hwanhee, watching from the green room, says he’s looking forward to Jay. And speaking of Boys Planet, That Vocal Coach Guy greets Jay, and they say “long time no see” kind of stuff. It’s interesting -- Jay’s Korean is obviously a lot stronger than it used to be, but he’s clearly still not fluent.
Vocal Coach Guy also knows Hong Seongjun from when Seongjun was on PD101, so the other judges tease him for knowing everyone -- is he like, the mayor of MNET? Vocal Coach Guy shakes off the teasing, but takes the time to praise Jay’s talent.
Solar and Wendy ask Hayoon why, if he’s ranked so high and can choose any song he wants, he chose this song. He says, in his very cute way of talking, that he thinks YG songs fit his voice, and we’re left to ponder how someone so cyoo can also be so YG we head into a flashback.
Let’s take a quick break and talk about the song itself. It was released in 2015 as a digital single only, with no video; an official for YG said that the song was too sad to make an MV for it! It was also unusual for a Big Bang song in that it featured only singing, not rapping. The lyrics describe a break up; the chorus goes, “If you, if you/ If it’s not too late / Can’t we get back together? / If you, if you/ If you’re struggling like I am / Can’t we make things a little easier?/ I should’ve treated you better when I had you.” The song did really well on the charts and got a lot of critical praise. For the record, I think it’s gorgeous, and I’m glad it’s going to get a cover done by a team of all main-vocalist. It has the feeling of a song written out of a real emotional place, and needs to be performed from that same emotional place if possible. Good things idols aren’t allowed to date, or they might actually experience some of these emotional situations! Sigh.
So, back to the flashback!
We learn that Hayoon chose If You immediately, because he thinks it suits him. Kang Hayoon kind of reminds me of that one episode of the Brak show where it turned out Zorak could sing in this really nice, clean voice -- but in reverse. Hayoon has this soft, sweet speaking voice and then he sings like an ageless wizard.
Anyway, based on my reconstruction of the team formation, six other contestants chose their songs next, and didn’t choose this one, but Jay made a bee-line for it. Jay explains that he chose If You at least in part because he wanted to work with Hayoon, which is kind of funny since earlier in the episode we learned that Hayoon was wary of working with Jay.
Hong Seongjun, looking on from down in the gladiator pit, says he doesn’t want to be in the same song as Hayoon and Jay, but after 17 more guys make their choice, he ends up choosing If You anyway. After all, he’s a great singer too, right? By the time Geonu chooses, all that is left besides If You is Decalcomanie, Don't Go, Breath, and of course Every Moment (more on that later), but he chooses If You.
They sing a bit together to help decide how to divide up the parts. Honestly, I’m not sure that I’m as much of a superfan of Hayoon’s voice as everyone else seems to be. I get it that it’s unique, and I definitely like some unique voices, but Hayoon’s voice just isn’t the kind of voice I love-love-love. I like it, don't get me wrong, but it's not my favorite voice in the whole world. Jay says Hayoon’s voice is very similar to G-Dragon’s voice, and I guess it is, actually, that’s fair -- but GD isn’t exactly known as an excellent vocalist, is he? He’s more of a rapper, songwriter, allrounder, swag king. (G-Dragon is the leader of Big Bang, if you're not familiar.)
So, I watched this episode the first time while a bit stoned (it’s legal where I live, guys, and I’m over 21) and I wrote down: “Jay is singing too, and jesus god on a pony he sounds gorgeous. I’m so distracted by his pink lipstick but his voice? Amazing. He says that he really wants a main part, and I want him to have one.” So… yeah. That’s how I feel now, too. (Write stoned, but edit sober, is what I always say.)
And they begin….
I know some of you may not have a decent link to the episode, so I’ll give the version with all the interruptions and reactions too, in case you want to watch it.
Here’s the version without all the reactions, if you want just the performance.
Here’s the version with all the reactions -- you can turn on the captions if you want.
My thoughts:
Basically, Jay’s voice is so impossibly sweet that he makes everyone else sound almost bad. I know I said he needs to work on his pitch and nasality, but he didn’t seem to have any pitch issues with this song, not even minor ones, and he was a lot less nasal. When I watched the performance before I saw the episode, I thought maybe he’d worked through the song with a trainer or judge or something to do the job he did, and you know, maybe he did. Regardless of how he did it, he sounded fantastic.
If you were eating really high quality ice cream, would you want to have a handful of Doritos right in the middle? Even if you like Doritos? I guess maybe some people would, but it’s not really the experience I’d want, personally. Doritos in one bowl, Ben & Jerry’s in the other, you know?
What I’m saying is that Jay is the ice cream and Hayoon is the Doritos.
Hayoon does have a GD-esque voice. It’s cool to listen to by itself, but next to Jay’s honey voice, it stands out kind of unpleasantly to me. It’s not a deal breaker or anything; it’s just that it wasn’t my favorite blend.
If you listen to just Seongjun’s voice, it’s nice too, if sometimes fairly nasal. Next to Jay's, it pales a bit, but on its own, it's really nice. It’s got texture and warmth and emotion. But he loses control just that little bit in service of the emotion, and he has a habit of letting his voice kind of “slump” at the end of each line. (That’s my term for it -- I don’t know if there’s an official way to explain.)
Judging by the criteria of, “who showed the most emotion,” it’s Geonu by a mile. But it was maybe a bit too much emotion…? He ended up going a bit pitchy and here and there -- he also loses control in service of the emotion. I could imagine a fan enjoying that, but I don’t think it’s what these judges want. That said, his vocal color is actually really very sweet and pleasant. I think he probably adds a lot to Just B songs.
The parts in harmony sounded pretty amazing. Everyone was in such control. Nice work, team!
Overall, this performance was really great. If this was a real vocal group, I’d like to listen to them. Hayoon’s instinct that his voice and Jay’s wouldn’t mix well was dead on, but I’d work around that to hear each of them individually. I also think that all three of the other voices blended well. It also doesn’t hurt that I love this song. I admit fully that it will be harder for me to evaluate some of the other songs.
MNET Edit:
It’s comparatively restrained for an MNET edit, with a lot of reactions but a minimum of instant replays from both the other guys and the judges.
The judges say:
The judges love Jay and Hayoon especially. It seems that only Geonu leaves all the judges stone faced. The boys backstage are impressed by especially by Jay especially, but seem to have kind words for all four.
When the song is over, everyone applauds, and Dahee asks the judges what they thought.
That Vocal Coach Guy says that overall they were good. Jay was a good fit for the song, and he really enjoys Hayoon’s unique tones.
Baekho praises Seongjun as the one whose performance held the performance together. Aww, that’s nice he got a bit of love. He really did sound nice here, and displayed a bit of range compared to his teaser song performance.
Jaehwan says that Geonu’s gestures and expressions were too canned and pre-planned, and it made his performance feel lifeless. Kind of harsh, but fair, I think. It’s tough because in kpop idol music, they tend to plan everything, even minor things like when they’re going to pass their hand in front of their face. Coming here where they’re expected to basically freestyle sing may be a tough adjustment for them.
Hearing this tough critique upsets our sweet Sunyoul, who asks his teammate Ji Yeon Woo to feel how hard his heart is beating.
With any luck, some girls will ship this and vote for him! Fighting, Yeonwoo! Fighting, Sunyoul!
Dahee asks the judges to select the top tier singer. It’s down to Jay versus Hayoon, and the judges spend time thinking, but it seems kind of obvious who it’s going to be Jay. The boys back stage think it will be Jay, too.
It turns out it’s unanimous --
-- they all chose Jay.
The other guys congratulate him, but they’re obviously disappointed to not be picked themselves.
When Dahee asks Wendy about her reaction to Jay’s voice, she says it tickled her ears, and I know what she means.
Jay kind of can’t believe he’s hearing such high praise from Wen-fucking-dy from Red-fucking-Velvet. I would die. I would die! I would evaporate into a wisp of carbon and oxygen if Wendy praised my singing voice!!
Dahee asks how it feels to win, and Jay tries to answer but first has to figure out what to call the judges. Eunkwang says he can call him hyung, which also blows Jay’s mind. Jay decides to stay formal, thanks them for the compliments, and promises to keep working hard.
Again, I’m sure the other boys are disappointed, but I think they knew it was a long shot to win against Jay. They try to take it in stride because they mostly got good feedback.
The judges talk about how good Jay is until it’s time for the next performance.
Every Moment of You
When the next song pops up on screen, the whole judging panel is pretty shocked, because it is apparently a really difficult one to sing. It’s called “너의 모든 순간 (Every Moment of You)” and is originally by Sung Sikyung. It’s from a drama My Love From The Star which was a phenomenon at the time, to the point that the lipstick color the main actress wore ended up trending. I watched this drama and liked it (not loved it but liked it a lot), but I didn’t really recognize the song, which is telling. I do often get to like songs from dramas I watch because you hear them over and over, you know? I just find this song a bit cheesy, personally. If you like it, rock on -- a LOT of people like this song.
Some of the lyrics:
After a while, when I recognized you, Everything was clearly changing/ My world separates to before and after knowing you/ When you breathe, a warm wind blows/ When you smile, dazzling sunlight shines …. Because you stayed there, because it’s you / Because you sometimes quietly lean on my shoulder/ I’m really, completely happy / I follow you as time flows and stops.
Anyway! So, the guys come out and introduce themselves.
Jang Intae says he’s hoping to establish himself as a good singer. Jang Intae was the one who came in last place in the voting. He performed a BtoB song as his teaser (V31) so it’s safe to guess he might be a fan of Eunkwang’s. Jaehwan gives Intae’s introduction a lot of approval, and we find out later that the two of them are friends.
Seunghun from CIX introduces himself and says “I sing deep emotions with a soft voice.”
Hong Sungwon says he’s a musical actor who will tap your eardrums sweetly. He’s in this fabulous ombre sweater with frayed hems and I want it. Sungwon is the one who sang Desperado as his teaser song, and I thought he did a great job.
Finally, Bain says he’s going to cut your heartstrings which doesn’t sound great…? Maybe it sounds better in Korean.
We hop back in time to see some of their preparations. We find out that Sungwon the musical actor chose this song quite willingly, but he was 14th to pick, meaning that 13 guys chose a song before him and none of them chose this song. In fact, it was the song that stayed empty the longest. Then, when we got to the last four guys to choose -- Bain, Seunghun from CIX, Lim Junhyuk (former Day 6), and Jang Intae -- there were three spaces still in Every Moment of You and one space in Breath. So there wasn’t really much in the way of choice for those last four guys, and three of them ended up here. What I’m saying is that most of the guys really didn’t want to sing this song, Sungwon aside.
When it came to their preparations, the main issue was, who gets to sing the intro? It’s kind of the “killing part” of the song, the part that everyone mimics when they talk about this song. At first, it looks like the team is going to have the musical actor Sungwon sing it, but then CIX’s Seunghun challenges him. Who won it? We have to watch the performance to find out.
Here’s the version without all the reactions, if you want just the performance.
Here’s the version with all the reactions -- you can turn on the captions if you want.
My thoughts:
Enh, guys, I had a rough time with this one, but I admit the song is kind of growing on me, despite my best efforts to keep not liking it.
Overall, this wasn't bad, but I liked some of the performances more than others.
So the first time I listened, I just listened, not watching, so I wouldn’t know who was who. Then I watched it again to match up voice to singer. From my blind listening, I ranked them
Sungwon (the musical actor)
Bain (orange hair from Just B)
Seunghun (from CIX)
Intae
I just didn’t really like the way Intae sang this.
It was so nasal, for starters. He has to switch awkwardly to falsetto sometimes and when he does it’s the wrong kind of breathy. He must be doing something wrong with his breathing because he also runs out of breath at the end of lines sometimes. He does have good pitch, and nice control over his vibrato. But overall this is just sort of not something I like to listen to. I feel bad because he came in last place in the voting and I don’t want to kick a guy when he’s down, but… yeah.
I also didn’t much like Seunghun’s performance. Again, I thought it was quite nasal, though not as nasal as Intae’s. He runs out of breath in the first bit, which may have been a stylistic choice but comes across to me as a mistake. His vocal color is certainly pretty on the lower notes when the nasality is less present, and boy, does the camera love his pretty face.
Eunkwang is edited to show disgust for Bain’s singing, which, you guys, ugh, omg, I can’t, I’m so mad. Bain did great. I’d admit it if he didn’t, but he did great. Fuck this show. I swear. His longer notes have resonance. He has barely any nasality. He has a tiny teeny too much vibrato for my taste here but I think it’s appropriate for the song. Pitch? Check. Emotion? Check. Breath support? Check. I don’t get the criticism.
Sungwon, to me, was the obvious MVP. His voice is so clear and lovely that it just goes down easy in your ear holes. He doesn’t have a hint of nasality and his control and pitch are both spot on. He vibrato is perfect, just perfect. Any more would be too much and less would be not enough. He also looks right at the camera and acts it perfectly. I also think the camera loves his pretty face, too, but you guys know that I don’t know who is or isn’t handsome in this world.
The MNET edit:
They of course play an instant replay of those important first few notes, and see everyone reacting to them. We get a lot of edited in reactions from the judges to let us know that apparently Bain is terrible, just the worst, get off the stage you loser. But other than that, the edit is relatively restrained for MNET. I guess they’re not going to be tap dancing on their edit keyboard as much for this show as they do for Boys Planet-esque shows.
The judges say:
All of the judges compliment Seunghun’s singing in the intro. Then Jaehwan compliments everything about him, including his height and looks. That’s… not the point, Jaehwan, but ok.
Wendy really liked musical actor Sungwon, and praises him a lot. Her praising him makes me feel smart. Yay! Wendy and I agree so all is right with the world.
Solar is glad that Intae smiled. I guess she has a point since the song is a love song, and watching most of them sing, you’d think that it was a sad song. I mean, here’s Bain singing with his eyes basically closed -- and he was like this for a WHILE.
But I don’t think Intae's smiling overcomes the other more serious problems with his performance.
Eunkwang says, “Bain used a singing method that is far from this song.” I don’t know what that is even supposed to mean. But of course, we just see this one sentence from Eunkwang, and don’t hear what any of the other judges had to say about him. This is just the MNET editing, and MNET has decided to hate Bain. Well, I hate MNET, how about that? Also, Eunkwang, you’re low-key on my shit list. I didn’t get the best impression of you on Kingdom, TBH, so… yeah.
Oh no, Bain is sad! Everyone listen to his cover of Seven by Jungkook to cheer him up.
The judging panel is over, and it’s time to choose top tier. The boys backstage think it’ll either be the musical actor Sungwon or CIX’s Seunghun. I’d give it to Sungwon, if it’s not obvious.
Most of them vote for CIX’s Seunghun, but Solar votes for Intae. OMG, Solar. You can even see That Vocal Coach Guy looking at her as if to say WTF.
Naturally, Seunghun is really glad to be chosen top tier after what happened in the first vote. Even though I didn’t adore his performance here, he’s a sweet guy and I know he really wants to be recognized as a vocalist, not just a handsome face, so I’m happy for him. Also, he’s singing in the ballad style, which is what he was asked to do, so if it’s not to my taste, maybe that’s ok.
Ok, I think that’s good for now! I’ll see you in the next one, when we’ll pick up with Don’t Go. Thanks as always for reading!
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Hi,
idk if you have done this before but do you have like a list of all the Earths and Firsts and other BL actors who share names and how the fandom differentiates between them cos there are so many with the same exact name that it's very, very confusing.
Yeah, I've done a post on Thai names and why they are they way they are, but with so many new Thai BLs and actors all the time, I'm afraid it'd be too difficult to keep track of cross over here in a post.
I just use MDL and suggest you do the same.
The easiest thing we do here on tumblr is to refer the the actor by his cheu len + first name e.g.
Fluke Natouch
And that will usually be in the tag of the post he's mentioned in.
Some lazy bums like me will use cheu len + the show he's best known for e.g.
Fluke (UWMA)
or his pair brand e.g.
Fluke of OhmFluke
A few Thai actors have gotten online handles that stuck like smol Earth AKA cooheart AKA Earth of SantaEarth because his first name is bonkers (affectionate*): Earth Katsamonnat. LTR BL bloggers who like to flex will go deep on these handles. Again, check the tags to see if the first name is there so you know which Earth it is.
*Most of my Thai friends are well aware of how extreme their names seem to everyone else. You can see the Thai Kpop idols joking about this often.
I appreciate it's complicated, but on the flip side think about how many Marys or Johns there are (English) or Hugos or Marias (Spanish), or Dimitrios or Marias (Greek), and... I could keep going.
Parents reuse names all the time. I have a theory that people who breed are generally lacking in creativity & imagination, that why they procreated in the first place. Nothing better to do.
Oooo, I'm mean today. I'll show myself out.
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A Lost Tomb Meta Argument for the Bond Between Liu Sang and Wu Xie
Listen. Liu Sang may get all clever and snarky at Wu Xie with passive aggressive one-liners at first (Lucille Bluth voice: good for him), but here I want to talk about how the progress of LTR and their own personalities point to them developing a really sweet friendship over the series.
Note: I haven’t read the books, just seen snippets, so I know there are things here that won’t hold up to the source text; I’m doing this meta based on the show alone, apologies for any confusion or big anachronisms to the book.
1.) They are both defensive, snarky, and wary people whose life experiences have made them this way. Wu Xie hides it far better behind his charm and smiles, plus he does usually have his iron triangle and family support to fall back on. But I like that when Liu Sang confronts Wu Xie over the whole “you’re dying and in a dangertomb dude wtf” thing, you get to see the look on his face right after Wu Xie responds being all “bitch try me I will deny everything”— Liu Sang actually looks pleasantly surprised by it, and keeps his mouth shut until the situation becomes too obvious. That face in that moment isn’t confusion or fear, that’s some straight-up recognition. Like, oh shit, he’s still annoying but it’s weird now because I totally get him and appreciate that he has a spine after all. Liu Sang is a stranger here, he just met Wu Xie like 12 hours ago, but somehow he understands him perfectly in that moment and I appreciate that acknowledgment of kinship.
2.) Beneath all the prickliness, they are both soft at heart. Wu Xie had ten years of hell to transform into a excellent liar and actor, Liu Sang’s backstory is trauma after betrayal after trauma. But we see how they are both capable of extraordinary goodness—the first time we meet Liu Sang, he awkwardly tries to help a small child he believes is in danger, and later becomes a member of the squad despite his half-hearted efforts not to like them. Liu Sang’s loyalty, once earned, is powerful and unconditional. Wu Xie’s best (and most double edged) qualities are, as I’ve discussed before, his compassion, love and loyalty, and these qualities overwhelm his guardedness over and over again in the series. Despite that coldly pragmatic Wu mindset he sometimes develops, what ultimately drives Wu Xie and what makes the show is his passion for adventure and love for his people.
3.) Xiao Ge. The Venn diagram betwixt our two foxes. There’s a reason the Wu Xie/Xiao Ge/Liu Sang tag is alive and well. Honestly though, they both gravitate towards Xiao Ge at first due to their fascination with him, but Wu Xie has had the benefit of getting to know Xiao Ge much sooner and in a different capacity and is already his boyfriend one of the very few people who’s truly close to Xiao Ge. He is himself possessive over Xiao Ge to a degree—I’ve seen some hilarious jealous-Wu Xie posts—but I think a lot of it stems from a place of long familiarity that has been hard-won. Liu Sang starts from a place of what he admits is idolization, but I think a turning point happens early on in the tombs, when he admits to Xiao Ge that he played a trick on Pangzi and Wu Xie that indirectly got them into trouble. Liu Sang’s expression shows that he knows how foolish this joke makes him look now that something bad has happened, even though they both know he didn’t mean any real harm. BUT. He owns up anyway to do the right thing. Like Wu Xie, Liu Sang is a person whose pride can get the best of him, but who is capable of casting it aside once he realizes it’s a problem. He then shifts gears and uses his ability not to impress Xiao Ge but to help save Wu Xie and Pangzi. He then chooses to follow the group at a distance from then on rather than trying to still stick to Xiao Ge’s side. I don’t think it’s really just fear of Pangzi, as is claimed by that character in the show—I think it’s more awkwardness and even some guilt. Once things change and the friendship grows, Liu Sang is no longer trailing behind. I appreciate that they so clearly come to occupy different places in Xiao Ge’s life—his soulmate and his protege—but they also come to be friends.
4. The realness of their interactions. Liu Sang is the only person in this series who meets Wu Xie for the first time as his present dying heir self, not sweet bebe Wu Xie, not sheltered Tianzhen, and he sees him as he truly is and treats him like a regular person (no disrespect to the marvelous Xiao Bai, but she does put Wu Xie on a pedestal for so much of the series until she knows better). It’s clear that Wu Xie also sees Liu Sang as he is, not just a clever tomb raiding tool or pretty-boy but instead this lonely kid who is human and vulnerable. (I have to wonder to what degree his regret over everything that happened with Li Cu influences how easy he goes on Liu Sang in the show?) He doesn’t react to Liu Sang’s initial sass on the beach, doesn’t really get mad for the trick Liu Sang played in the tomb, and (hilariously) won’t ever let Liu Sang thank him for the instinctive rescue as they are escaping the tombs—they’ve already silently jumped to “it’s cool, I gotcha” status in like three episodes.
Most importantly: I truly believe that once they meet, Li Cu and Liu Sang will form a “how did my life get turned upside down and admittedly way better in the long run due to this insane cardigan-rocking disaster and his equally insane friends” club and that they will have commiseration meetings during parties whenever Li Cu’s Adopted Dad and Liu Sang’s Idol are getting…cozy.
I also have a headcanon that during a random visit to deliver something, Liu Sang learns he now has a room that’s entirely his at Wushanju, fully soundproofed to protect his ears and located by a private door out to the courtyard so he can come and go as he wishes.
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today i realized that in no possible universe would sam and eileen would be a like. functional, has-their-shit-together kind of couple. sam hasn’t been in a serious LTR for 15 years, and we don’t know if eileen ever has. sam has effectively NEVER lived alone and eileen has effectively ALWAYS lived alone. even setting aside the hunter stuff they both have the relationship skills of a feral child raised by wolves. like i think they’ll make it work it’s just gonna look like what space aliens think human dating is like. can you even imagine them like applying for a mortgage or something? jesus
this ask is especially funny to me because i dont think im a particularly vocal saileen blog or anything. like thank u anon i agree & ur right, i just think its funny you picked me to share this with (and i appreciate it <3).
on this topic, i think that sam would mega overcompensate for his internalized misogyny by trying to cook and clean everything and eileen would let him because as you say she has lived alone her whole life and also most of that probably in motels so she's never cleaned a damn day. of course sam is terrible at it and has "how to unfuck your room" bookmarked on his laptop because he's a recovering marathon cleaner. dean cleans every time he goes to their house because they'll just have like, caramelized onions stuck to the wall behind their oven, and it gives him hives.
also i think eileen would go on solo hunts early in their relationship bc she wants to like, not be in the way or anything, and sam would be so melodramatic over it but again the aforementioned perception of internalized mahogany would make him nervous to bring it up. so he'd be like 'oh you can go on that hunt alone if you want to ... just like, i mean, personally, i would probably take like, i dunno, like a buddy or something' and eileen (because im projecting onto her) would be like 'oh no that's ok i don't wanna inconvenience you and also i'm incredibly badass and strong i can just tell you about my kills afterwards and you can be attracted to me' and sam would be like oh ok. sure.
dean of course thinks this is incomprehensible because a) he has never willingly let cas out of sight except to kick him out of the house (these are not contradictory actions in dean's mind) and b) his primary experience with sam is as his Bitchy Younger Bro so the idea of him being delicate makes zero sense to him. sam thinks it's hilarious that dean is trying to give him relationship advice so he refuses to tell dean about any of his relationship developments from then on.
also i think sam and eileen would approach sex the way me n my ex did, which is to say only about once every other month, generally as a joke, and often while watching supernatural. obviously i dont think sam and eileen would watch supernatural because it doesn't exist in their universe but we can insert the equivalent media. like torchwood. i think sam and eileen would make plans to have sex but it would always be through the premise of a torchwood watching date so their sex attempts would be pretty hit or miss depending on what mood the episode puts them in. eileen has a genuine crush on tosh but sam thinks the show's like just straight up bad, but he's ironically invested in it. obviously this is also a source of bonding between eileen and cas since cas has seen all of torchwood twice.
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jack and his ex make me think of swiftwyn
imagine if they broke up after 8 years of dating 💔
I mean it'll be worse tbh because Jack and his ex were together from when he was 18. Like in the back of their minds they probs always weren't quite sure because they were so young. It sucks even more if it was a person you genuinely believed was forever.
Guys, breakup and divorces are fucking shit.
And an adult LTR ending is not just a big melodramatic RED meltdown, it's literally trying to figure out how the fuck you live life without this person you've spent so much time with. It's figuring out what you're going to cook now that you're alone, whether you still want to go to your 'favourite places', where your pets are going to live and how you're going to sleep without them, how it's going to feel to wake up alone or go to sleep without telling like one last joke. Your friends are going to have to figure out how to hang out with both of you, or pick one, or you're going to have to go to some group hangs where it's always going to feel a little awkward and never exactly right. Your family members are going to miss that person. You're going to forget shit when you move out or take one of their books or vinyls or a desk lamp or something on accident and then feel conflicted about what to do and whether to even worry about returning it because this item also felt like it was yours for so fucking long. One day, whether it's quickly or in a bit, you're going to have to see them with someone else. And you can know that it was the right fucking decision and it still sucks ass.
So that's why anyone manifesting for a breakup for any of the couples we follow is a fucking asshole tbh because I don't know why you'd want your fave to go through that.
It's a weird thing to think about in order to worry and it's even weirder to manifest it.
Obviously these things happen, but idk why you'd want them to.
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Welcome to Seattle (Ch. 5 of 5)
They spent the entirety of the next day together. They had exchanged a few texts last night before Sirius asked Remus if he would like to get coffee with him (as a date, Sirius had written in a second message before Remus could respond to the first). Remus instantly responded affirmatively, and asked if Sirius was free in the morning.
Remus left his apartment a little earlier than he had to, and eventually found himself walking up towards the Starbucks in Pike Place Market that Sirius had insisted on meeting at (it’s not basic because this store is the original Starbucks. It’s very hipster actually) a whole ten minutes early. Surprisingly, Sirius was already there to meet him, occupying a spot in the line that extended down the sidewalk. Evidently, being the original Starbucks meant it attracted a lot of customers.
Sirius’s dark hair was pulled away from his face in an elaborate half-up half-down style, with small braids that reminded Remus of majestic elves. He wore black Doc Martens and a matching leather jacket. His face lit into a bright smile when he spotted Remus.
“Good morning!” Sirius said, and opened his arms for a hug. Remus let the embrace last an extra second as he tried to will his face to stop blushing.
“Good morning,” he finally returned, pulling away. “How was the rest of your shift last night?”
“Pretty easy, actually! It quieted down a bit after you left, and I was extra-motivated to close quickly, because the most adorable diner gave me his phone number and an absolutely ridiculous note.”
“Oh really?”
“Mm hm.”
They both laughed softly. Remus felt light. With his hands tucked into his pockets, he turned to nudge Sirius’s shoulder with his own. Sirius returned the nudge, but stayed close afterwards, their arms barely touching.
The line moved quickly, and eventually they were leaving the store with their drinks in hand, Remus with a simple iced drip coffee, and Sirius with an elaborate pumpkin-spice sugar bomb cold brew concoction. The barista had actually shuddered when Sirius had asked for an extra shot of “pumpkin-spice syrup,” something which Remus was horrified to learn existed at all.
They walked through Pike Place Market and into Victor Steinbruick park, while sipping their drinks. The city was offering a rare clear morning sky, so they kept walking outdoors to enjoy it. Small talk flowed easily, and soon they were learning all about each other’s lives and hobbies.
“Okay, you have two seconds,” Sirius began suddenly, “favorite movie. Go.”
“Pride and Prejudice,” Remus replied instantly, “but not the 2005 one, the 1995 mini-series from BBC.”
“Oh my god,” Sirius emphasized. “Of course you would say something like that.”
“It’s good!” Remus defended. “The drama, the pining, young Colin Firth, did I mention the drama?”
Sirius laughed. “Maybe once or twice.”
“What’s yours?” Remus asked.
“Easy. Shrek 2.”
Remus dissolved into laughter, and eventually gained enough air to ask why it was specifically the second Shrek movie.
“Simple answer. The soundtrack. Counting Crows? Funkytown? The finale where Jennifer Saunders as the Fairy Godmother sings Holding Out For a Hero? Remus, it is simply the greatest film to exist.”
Remus continued to laugh, “of course you know her name, oh my god.”
“Okay, our second date should be a movie night, we can watch both of our favorites together,” Sirius said, looking at Remus and pausing, “and decide which is superior,” he finished, eyes narrowed playfully.
Remus felt a small excited feeling in his stomach at Sirius already talking about a second date. “I would love that.” He said sincerely, looking directly into Sirius’s eyes.
“Although,” Remus began with a very matter-of-fact tone, turning to the horizon, “Pride and Prejudice is five and a half hours long.”
“What?!” Sirius said incredulously.
“But it’s so worth it!” Remus reassured. “We can make coffee, it’ll be fine.”
“You,” Sirius said, eyebrows raised, “are ridiculous. But I love it.”
Remus felt that little rush of excitement again. He wondered if he would ever get used to Sirius, and not feel those butterflies anymore. He hoped not.
Their conversation topics included deeper things as well. Remus learned about Sirius’s troubles with his family, and how he was abruptly cut-off financially from them in the middle of his second year of college.
“I had been working part-time at the restaurant, but then I just couldn’t afford the full tuition and the stress so I ended up withdrawing from school,” Sirius explained. “Once I took care of myself mentally and had a more stable life, I started enrolling in the occasional online community college class. I’ll actually be able to graduate with a full Bachelor’s degree in a year, which, I’m already twenty-six, so I know it’s super late, but…” his voice trailed off at the end.
“What, no, Sirius.” Remus reassured him. “That’s amazing, that must have been so hard to accomplish, but you’ve managed to stick with it anyway, I’m, well, you should be proud of yourself,” he finished lamely.
Sirius looked at Remus for a beat before responding. “Thank you, that means a lot.”
“What do you want to do after graduating?” Remus asked, hoping to steer the conversation back to more familiar ground. He was more than willing to talk about something hard if Sirius needed it, but he didn’t want to give patronizing advice on how Sirius should be feeling about his problems if Sirius wasn’t asking for it.
Sirius’s face lit up. “Actually, and this may sound kind of stupid, but I really want to be a Kindergarten teacher.”
“Oh my god,” Remus laughed, “you would be absolutely perfect for that.”
Eventually, Sirius asked Remus about his visit to the restaurant last night. Remus remembered his own emotional state, and that Sirius had definitely seen some of it.
“Um, yeah, last night didn’t really go well for me before you saw me.” Remus began somewhat awkwardly. He explained in vague terms the fact that he had been on a first date with someone who he was not planning on seeing ever again. “But I also deleted my Tinder account last night, so, don’t worry.”
“The steakhouse man was bad enough to make you give up on online dating forever?” Sirius asked incredulously.
“Oh, no, actually.” Remus answered. “I only officially deactivated it after you texted me.”
***
Sirius was ridiculous. He was absolutely determined to make Remus laugh, even if it was by doing something stupid himself. After Remus accidentally stumbled on a protruding sidewalk curb, Sirius dramatically flung himself against a telephone pole. As they walked past the Space Needle, Sirius insisted on photobombing every tourist he could, and then made Remus take photos of himself copying their poses, either pinching the top of the Space Needle or kicking it.
There was a youthful energy in Sirius’s everyday motions, it seemed to Remus, and it successfully brought out Remus’s own youthful side. Their morning coffee turned into lunch, where they ordered sandwiches and one gigantic brownie to share. After Sirius told a joke that left Remus almost crying in laughter, Remus decided it was time.
“So, I feel like I have to say this.” He began, then gave a sheepish smile. “I kind of hate tiramisu.”
Sirius cackled, “I knew it!”
“What?!”
“I realized you didn’t like it after the first time I brought it to you. But I didn’t know what else to do to get your attention, because for some reason that’s the only dessert we sell!”
“So you brought me green beans instead?”
Sirius waved his arms defensively. “I was smitten, Remus. I didn’t know what to do.”
Remus just smiled.
***
Sirius didn’t have to be back at the restaurant until his shift started at 5, so on their way back from lunch they took the scenic route. They were walking in comfortable silence when a clap of thunder sounded overhead. Suddenly, sheets of rain began dumping from the sky.
Remus’s first reaction was to look for a taxi, or duck into a storefront, or hide from the weather somehow. But, Sirius let out a whoop of pure excitement.
“YES, it’s raining!” Sirius said, turning to grin at Remus.
“This is Seattle, it does that a lot–” Remus started, but was cut off when Sirius grabbed his hand, and pulled him, running through the rain.
Remus looked at him in astonishment, before he laced their fingers together and ran faster. If he felt light before, at the start of their date, now he felt weightless. Pure joy flowed through him as the sky continued its downpour and Sirius spun him in a sloppy ballroom dance twirl, their hands still linked.
On the middle of a small pedestrian bridge spanning a roaring creek, they stopped running. Panting from the run, cheeks flushed from the adventure, and completely soaked in water, time stopped as Sirius turned to face Remus.
“I really want to kiss you right now,” Sirius breathed.
“Good,” Remus said, and closed the gap.
***
One month later, Remus found himself in a successful LTR.
#wolfstar#harry potter#original fic#fluff#modern au#non-magic au#seattle#finding yourself post-breakup#found family#writer remus#waiter sirius#humor#great friend group#online dating#remus#sirius#james#lily#dorcas#marlene#dorcas/marlene#minerva mcgonagall#gilderoy lockhart
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I won’t ask for much (but just this once, I’d like you) 5/10
Here’s the halfway point, and it’s a bit of a whopper. I think this is probably my favorite chapter out the entire thing, with the first a very close second. The talk by the fire was one of the earliest scenes that gelled for me when planning the entire fic out, and I knew that if I wasn’t able to write much else, I at least wanted to get that part down on paper.
And if things go according to plan, I might have a little something extra to add to this tonight. ;)
Pairing: Sharky Boshaw x John Seed
Rating: E (but only for Ch. 10, the rest are a solid T)
Word Count: 7.3K
Link to AO3!
Ch. 1 / Ch. 2 / Ch. 3 / Ch. 4 / Ch. 5 / Ch. 6 / Ch. 7 / Ch. 8 / Ch. 9 / Ch. 10
(and there’s a bonus fic to go with this one too)
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Sharky steals a boat. It just happens to be John’s boat, and when it’s damaged along with his boathouse, John proceeds to lay out a means of having Sharky pay him back. [No Cult AU]
———–
Maybe the work schedule wasn’t as ironclad a thing as it used to be.
John liked routine, sure, and had been real anal about it when Sharky had first started out, but there was a flexibility to it now. It was no longer always about when, so long as it was done, and he could work with that.
So, he took a morning off when he needed it. Took on a few more jobs around town for anyone willing to let him shoulder it, and if there was any overlap, all it took was one message to clear it up. John was willing to work with him now, and that alone was a relief.
...But if some nights lead to more chances to hang with him one-on-one without working, Sharky didn’t complain either. Got more time around John’s plane, and even got to pitch in when it came to working on his car too.
The real shocker for him on days when he did have to work, though, had been the fresh boards and nails set. The signs that someone else had been working down there when he hadn’t.
When he’d asked, John didn’t confirm it. He didn’t deny it either, but after ten minutes of standing around and talking with him, he grabbed a nearby hammer and took a spot right next to him. Went right to work, without even batting an eye, and Sharky couldn’t believe it. Grinned brightly at him as he punched him in the shoulder, and found he wanted John there for once.
This was starting to feel a whole lot like he’d made a friend.
One that was cagey in a whole lot of ways still, and one he couldn’t exactly pop down on the couch with for a weekend of pizza, beer, and porn to sort through, but close. And thinking it over, he didn’t find himself minding the change all too much either.
But some nights John needed to shift things around, and when Sharky woke up that morning nursing a hangover, he had a message waiting for him.
Family, John mentioned, the text sent at an hour that made his head pound harder. Have to reschedule. Sorry.
no bg deal he sent back, fumbling at his phone. hollar if you need me ltr no plns
Then went right back to sleep. With the day open, he spent the morning seeing how long he could go without pants before anyone else dropped by.
All too quiet after that, he’d nearly gone stir crazy when Hurk called, wanting his expertise on a special job. One that was better suited to two heads rather than his one. Or better yet, four hands, each for holding a stick of their brand of high explosive. That’s how they fished, and sure, it stirred up every other critter in the area, but as long as they weren’t ambushed by bears or cougars, it was a risk worth taking.
Mid-throw was when his phone went off. Just a message, not a call, but it made his pipe bomb go wide, and nearly had the two of them go for a dunk themselves.
Change in plans. Come over.
No further clarification, no explanation from John; just those words. Not that he went off on long tangents through text, but it was the quickest turnaround Sharky had seen yet, and he actually pulled out his phone to call him.
Holding a finger to one of his ears to block some of the sound, he waited. Heard the echo of an explosion in one, and ringing in the other only to get nothing but John’s voicemail.
“Hey, I’m going to have to cut out on this.”
“Now?” Hurk asked, with a stick of dynamite in each hand. “Just when I was thinking of getting ol’ Sally out?”
Sharky never held up well in the face of his cousin’s disappointment, especially when he pulled out that tone of voice, but held strong.
“Yeah, sorry. It’s…I’ve got this weird message to check out, and you can never tell if it’s gonna be the good kind or the bad kind until it’s hitting you in the face, and there’s not a whole lot to go on here.”
“Fine, get on out, go, go, go. I’ll be here for a while, but if I catch something cool you’ll be sad you missed out.”
Pulling up to John’s place, Sharky still hadn’t pinned down what the problem was. The boathouse catching fire wasn’t likely. He’d put out any cigarettes over by the picnic table, ‘cause he’d made too much progress there to blow it now.
Ticking off other options on his fingers, he narrowed them down as he made his way to the front, and was still down to two when he hit the doorbell.
The door swung open, but John wasn’t the one waiting on the other side.
It was Jacob Seed.
Ex-military. Private. Rocked the rowdiest set of scars he’d ever seen on a person. At least, judging from the ones he could see on his face. Probably hunted guys in the woods for sport, or at least thought about it, and had the training to do it if he wanted to.
Sharky could count on his fingers the number of times he’d run into the guy outside of the odd job in the mountains, but he knew he wasn’t the kind, friendly, approachable type. No, standing taller than most, Jacob didn’t trade more than a handful of words with anyone outside of Eli Palmer, and maybe the local hunters up north.
And if he thought John was bad, Jacob’s stare was a full-blown weapon. It made Sharky squirm on the spot.
“Uh, yo.”
“Boshaw.”
“How’s it going?” he asked, smiling a little too wide to keep it casual.
Jacob shrugged. “It’s going. You?”
“Kinda. Something’s always going. it’s just not going much right now if you get what I’m-well, what I’m getting at.”
Get what I’m getting at? What the hell was that?
The longer Jacob kept him there, the more he was going to try and fidget his way out of there, and he knew he was being read. Maybe even being messed with at this point, but he didn’t cut and run. Not yet.
“Is John around?”
“You here for something?”
“Yeah it’s…you know about the whole working-with-your-younger-bro thing, right? How I’m down by the river, putting shit up, and trying to make that entire area pretty again? Well, he got a hold of me. Mentioned wanting to work, and thinks he can snap his fingers and I’ll jump or something.”
Jacob’s glance took on an amused bent. “Does he? How high?”
“Uh, I can jump up to three, maybe four feet, but that’s not…it isn’t-”
That was it. That was it in a nutshell, and joking about it didn’t make it any easier to swallow.
Groaning, he crossed his arms and didn’t even bother looking Jacob in the eye this time around. “So, is he here, or…?”
Jacob moved his head, motioning behind him, and stepped aside. “He’s upstairs.”
With the path now open, Sharky took it a little faster than needed, not wanting to hang back too much or stay close to Jake. But that left him standing in the middle of John’s ranch house - and seeing the whole thing in full for the first time was a lot to take in at once.
Because when he’d mentioned loving nature shit, this was that on steroids. Like someone had told John this was what a cabin should’ve looked like instead of what one actually was. The antlers, the chandelier, the fucking bear skin rug? All surrounding one giant, roaring fireplace? It wasn’t even cold yet, and John had the whole thing done up to the nines.
That had him chuckling as Jacob took a few steps towards him.
“Something funny?”
Jolting slightly, Sharky shoved his hands into his pockets.
“I, uh…no. Okay, a little. You ever see those Hallmark movies? The ones set at Christmas, or just up in the mountains?”
Jacob craned his head towards him.
“Y’know, the kind where two people are snowed in, having to wait it out and huddle for warmth and shit?”
“No.”
Okay, so maybe he hadn’t seen too many either, but he’d seen the one. Hadn’t even been one of those parody pornos dressed up as one, so he had some genuine experience there.
“Well, uh, the place looks like that. Like, John’s staging it for something along those lines. Just for cuddling, huddling, and uh…yeah. Holiday stuff.”
“Stuff.”
“Stuff and things, yeah.” That actually got a snort out of Jacob, and Sharky gave himself a mental pat on the back. “I’m serious. Like that couch is primed for mistletoe and some uh, ho ho-holy shit, I’ll stop now.”
There was the sound of a door being slammed, and Sharky jumped. Seconds after, he caught John on the upper level as he strode towards the stairs, and breathed a sigh of relief.
Sharky called up to him. “Yo, man. Thought I’d need to-“
That’s when he caught the dark look crossing John’s face for the first time. That, and the actual speed with which he was walking. Asking was a mistake, but it was out of his mouth before he could stop it.
“Uh, John? You okay, amigo? You want me to come back another-“
John grabbed his arm as he passed by, and dragged Sharky along with him. Right past a concerned Jake, and right past the front door, leading him down towards the dirt road.
“Whoa, hey, wait!”
Nothing clicked, not his words and not the way he tried to pull away. John was a man possessed, focused only on a single point, and that didn’t sit well with him at all.
“Seriously, dude, stop!”
Sharky planted his feet, and yanked his arm out of the grip. That brought John to a stop, and Sharky watched him slowly turn towards him. Breathing harder than he should’ve been, Sharky took off his cap and brushed a hand through his hair.
“What the fuck, man?”
Tense, and with his jaw locked, John didn’t even bother giving him a response. Just a stare that would’ve killed any other person dead if he’d had the ability. Still, he wasn’t chasing him off, or leaving, and that made Sharky keep on trying.
“You wanna talk or something? You really look like…”
“What I want,” John bit out as he walked right up to him, “is to get as far away from that fucking house as possible. I don’t care where as long as it’s not here.”
Sharky sucked in a breath, not prepared for that level of venom or John’s sudden proximity, and let it out. “Uh, okay. Shit, let’s…let’s go then. Not like I was in the mood to work anyway.”
Shuffling around him, Sharky started back towards his car, and waved for John to follow. The heat of his stare wasn’t as bad from this distance, but it didn’t let up until John dropped it to climb into the passenger side of the vehicle. He fired the car up after that, hoping the damn thing wouldn’t stall, and the two sped out of there before anyone could come calling.
“Now I know what works for me whenever shit like that gets me down.”
Sharky turned on the radio only for John to flip it off. Balking at him again, Sharky noted that this time the road was the one having to deal with John glaring at it, and he tried to keep as light a tone as he could manage.
“Anyway, you need an outlet. Something to kick all that negative shit in the balls hard enough to make three family lines regret it. So, you can shrug it off, get up, and go back to living life like you want to. Maybe this won’t be your thing every time, but I think you might like this.”
“…Like what?”
“Well, I’d explain it to you, but this is one of those things where it’s better just to give it a try. Not to spoil any of the surprise as we head on out, but it rhymes with…shit. What rhymes with burn?”
Urn. Turn. Learn. Yearn. That was a good one. Not that he needed it for anything, but it was good to know. Fuck. Did he say burn out loud too?
Swearing under his breath, Sharky shook his head. “Anyway, a little ‘Burn, Baby, Burn’ never hurt anyone. Least, not anyone worth knowing.”
John said nothing, leaving Sharky to listen to the sound of the road as it crunched underneath the car’s tires, but right as he’d started tapping out an uneven rhythm on the steering wheel just to break it up, he heard him sigh.
“Hey, I promise it won’t be lame. Yeah, it’s not for everybody, but…”
He stopped talking when he saw John place his head in his hand. Covering his eyes, Sharky heard the catch in his breathing, and wished like hell he had the right words for him.
Unable to offer anything else, Sharky shifted his eyes back to the road. “Yeah.”
---
“Now I know you’ve seen it once before, and it ain’t fancy,” Sharky said after pulling up to his house, “but I’ve got a place to sleep, a rocking sound system, and when I need it, lots and lots of storage space for…stuff. Like real fun stuff, but not the illegal kind, ‘cause I don’t want you thinking that. Well, not a lot of it, just some of it.”
John was looking around now, taking in the area as he and Sharky got out, and Sharky led him out across the lawn.
“My house is your house, so settle on in and pull up a chair. The show’ll start soon as I can get this all together, and make it one worth waiting for.“
He shoved some wood into the area designated for his bonfires, and patted himself down before heading over to where he kept his propane. Rooting through the items, he picked up the bottle of lighter fluid – he’d start small, no need to have a full blow-out right off the bat – and glanced over his shoulder to see what John was doing.
He had approached the firepit while Sharky was busy; still silent, but looking closely at it.
“You doing good there, amigo?”
John’s head angled towards him. “Well enough.”
That he’d said anything at all was an improvement, but Sharky didn’t believe it for a second. Not with his back towards him, as he walked back to the pit.
John watched closely as Sharky sprayed the wood liberally with the lighter fluid. Then added more after, and when he tipped it over to slap at the bottom of it to get the last few drops out, John finally spoke up.
“You’re not serious.”
“Can’t have a decent barbeque without flames, man.”
“That many?”
The wry look he gave him stopped Sharky in his tracks. Or maybe it was the way the corner of John’s mouth was inching up. In spite of everything, he’d managed that at least, and Sharky felt his mouth go dry.
“Uh, yeah.” He held out a matchbook to him, and hoped he could keep it steady. His voice was a lost cause, but his next few words were better in line. “Kinda disappointing if you light it up only to have it fizzle out. Can’t get any perks out of that.”
“And this was your plan all along?” John’s odd semi-smile stayed in place, and only seemed to grow. “To invite me here to burn it off? Literally?”
He wasn’t wrong, but seeing as this was his usual go-to and yet not, Sharky really didn’t want to get into the nitty-gritty of it all. Not now, at least.
“You wanted out, and no other place in the county’s better prepped for this, so a quick ride to Boshaw Manor made sense. I know when shit’s gone south and there’s no hope of me shaking that feeling, this works, and I try to foster an environment here that’s all about letting loose when you need it. Pants-free preferred and encouraged, but by no means required.”
“Good to know,” John teased.
He hoped like hell John couldn’t clearly see what was happening with his face right now, but at this distance it was impossible not to.
“But you, uh… You seriously looked ready to rip a bear’s fucking head off, and I thought it’d help. So, here. Light it, and after we pop one off, maybe we can get more going. Kinda sad as is right now.”
Waving the matchbook in the air, he grumbled to himself as he dropped his eyes. But he felt John take the matches, and looked up again in time to see him light one.
John watched the flame dance in front of him for a few seconds, shielding it from the breeze with his hand. Leaning over to peek at it, Sharky nearly brushed shoulders with him, and wondered how long he was willing to hold onto it.
Pretty long at this rate, as the flames licked the wood and traveled towards his fingers.
“You gonna drop that?”
“In time.”
“‘Cause that’s going to get you if you let it stick around any longer.”
Not that he hadn’t let himself get distracted by the warmth of the fire before. How it flickered as it moved, wanting it all that much closer as it inched its way down towards him.
“Surely you don’t think I’m not paying attention to it.” Irritation crept into John’s voice, but he still wasn’t dropping the match.
“Seriously, man, I can treat a rowdy-ass burn if I have to, but that shit’s going to bite.“
“Charlemagne, I have it handled-“ John flicked his hand fast as he yelped in pain.
The match went out, leaving the two standing there in front of the neglected pit. Sharky tried not to, but there was no way he could keep the laugh from slipping out. John’s sharp look shut him up a second later, only breaking eye contact to keep on waving his hand.
“Yo, you okay?”
“Fuck,” John muttered, blowing on his fingers. “Everything’s fine.”
Sharky didn’t nudge him with his shoulder, but was tempted to as he watched John continue to try and sooth the burn.
“Sure about that? I can be back in two shakes of a jackrabbit’s tail if you want.”
John didn’t waste time lighting the next match. “I’m fine.”
His hands went up, backing off completely. But at that point he had something else to focus on. The fire was dancing in the wind again, and when John let the match fall into the pit, Sharky didn’t take his eyes off of it for a second.
The warm glow took, then grew. Rising slowly but surely as the fire found its footing, and he let out the breath he was holding. There it was. The feeling that washed over him, one that sank down deep into his bones.
Like coming home, in a way. Every time.
Sighing in contentment, he gave John a quick once-over. His attention was on the fire too, locked onto it as he slowly rubbed his fingers together. No one ever seemed to respond to it like he did, but the focus was there, his eyebrows drawn together as he kept on studying it.
John still kept on rubbing at his fingers, though. He had to bother the singed one, even if he was too stubborn to bring it up again.
Sharky stepped back, and gave John a light tap to the shoulder.
“Be right back. Gotta grab something.”
Jogging over to his house, he pushed open the door and made a beeline straight for his bathroom. Anything he had for first aid was scattered across the property if not left outside, so one minute became two, then became five as he rooted around the place.
Fishing the tube of burn cream out, he sighed in relief.
It had taken the edge off of some of his worst ones - the scars on his sides and back tingling as he subconsciously recalled them. Considering how often he tangoed with fire at all, he’d all but accepted it at this point, and was glad that John wasn’t rocking anything worse than what would be a light blister.
Band-aids were down to slim pickings, however. There were only five left, but he picked the best fit and made his way back out to the pit, taking a short stop by the fridge for beer and one hastily-filled glass of tap water.
Water was the last thing on his mind most nights, but John needed something out there, and Sharky tried not to stress over it too much as he rushed back out.
John started when he handed it over.
“What’s this?” He took the glass, and eyed its contents.
“Water. You know, for drinking?” A sheepish grin inched across Sharky’s face as he made the motion with his hand. “Didn’t want to leave you hanging without anything, and my fridge’s full up with beer, so…”
“Ah. Thank you,” he said, losing the suspicious tone immediately.
He took a light sip of it and Sharky didn’t miss the way he wrinkled his nose. Probably better used to the fancy stuff they’d filter before bottling, but John still held onto it. Doing that instead of spitting it out onto the ground earned him a point or two on the ‘Don’t be an asshole’ scoreboard, but Sharky would never admit it to him.
“And those?” John asked.
“I know you said you were fine, but here.” Sharky handed the items to him, and John set his glass down. “Best stuff for burns around. Slap some of this on, and in a day you won’t even feel it.”
“Are those…dinosaurs?” John held the bandage up, flashing the green tyrannosaurus rex at him.
“Yeah, man. Dinosaurs are badass. I don’t know if Jurassic Park was your thing or not, but I had that on repeat for a good three months after it came out. Solid gold right there, and great for hand-holding or grabbing during any tense shit.” He held his hand up as he leaned in, and waggled his eyebrows. “Guaranteed. Like sixty to seventy-five percent chance of getting some action too.”
John furrowed his brows, and kept the band-aid pinched between his fingers. Both unimpressed and unconvinced, which disappointed Sharky a little, but didn’t surprise him much either.
“Anyway, that was the first one I grabbed, but I think there’s another in there if you’re more of a triceratops fan. Or raptors?”
John slowly shook his head. “I’ve-I don’t have a preference.”
“Well, there you go. And I know you like blue and all, but green’s clearly the superior color here. Just saying.”
He clapped him on the back, and John gave him a withering glance before putting it on.
Dragging over a couple of chairs, Sharky popped them close to the pit - but not close enough to catch any sparks - and settled in. He kicked back and wished he could’ve propped his feet up, but with the other chair in use he had to make do, and leaned as far back as the worn fabric would let him. It strained against the motion, but held, and he knew there was a still a fair chance he’d bust a hole in it, or topple over. Just not now, at least.
“…How did this start?”
Glancing over at John, Sharky sat up when he realized he’d asked him a question. “What?”
“How, or when did you start doing this? The fires? Or, whatever this ritual is.”
“Ritual? This ain’t anything fancy like that.” Rubbing the back of his neck, Sharky let out a long whistle. “But fuck, how many years has it been now?”
Well over twenty. Since that day when he’d had skating on his mind, that and Wendy. He had such high hopes going into the day only to find a whole other thing worth keeping on for.
“Would you believe my first time was at a skating rink? This old place that used to be down by Fall’s End. Neon lights, tricked out wallpapers, and all the oldies you could ask for?”
“Concerning you? Yes.”
John sounded so sure of it. Like he could see the memory just as clearly as Sharky did. That got a warm laugh out of him.
“Imagining that sticky carpet, the flat soda, and those tunes? Real nice, right? It was the highlight of my month. Getting invited out there, pulling off some of my finest moves out on the floor. But I had to set the mood before heading in, and had a roll of quarters ready and everything.”
A grin settled in, almost fond as he recalled the start of it. The promise had been there, all right. He’d finally get a chance to say something. Do something, instead of dreaming about it. Funny how he’d dive into so many other things without thinking, but this? This he’d thought about. Over and over. Wanted it right.
“So?” John’s voice cut through again, shaking him out of it. “What happened?”
“I really wanted to ask this girl Wendy out. Had some good one-liners going, and had watched plenty of movies beforehand that I knew she liked. Wanted to really wow her, and show her what’s what.”
That had been the first pass of the plan. It seemed foolproof. Then he’d reached the rink after he’d crammed one too many quarters in the jukebox. Took one good look at her as he skated up, and…
John’s growing frown mirrored his own. Maybe even too well.
“It, uh-it didn’t go like I wanted. Went with my gut once I saw her, and thought I’d just -my hands started going everywhere.”
Confused, John thought over his words, and Sharky hoped he wouldn’t have to spell it out. “You grabbed her?”
“I…might’ve grabbed something.”
Realization hit John hard. “You groped her?”
“Like I said, it could’ve gone a lot better! Instincts being bad and all.” Dodging his eyes, Sharky held up his hands and faced the fire. “Look, it was a dumbass move, and I got a skate to the balls for it. Still, really wish I’d tried dancing instead. No way she would’ve turned down a date with a dude pulling off a solid moonwalk. On wheels.”
“Surely,” John huffed.
Flipping him off, Sharky sighed before continuing.
“So, I head out back. Figure I could light up a cig or something. Take the edge off that way. Well, I decided I’d light a trash can on fire too. See if I liked it, and soon the whole damn back-alley’s on fire. Like burning high with no hope of stopping. It spread, took half of the place out in the process, and yeah, it sucked. But it sucked a whole lot less after seeing that too.”
“That was…not the story I was expecting it to be.”
“Lot of people say that after hearing it. And that’s all of like, three people that even bothered listening to me while I was telling it, but it is what it is. Sucks that it took out that place, though. Seriously, had a great sound system there and everything.”
John raised a hand to his mouth, eyes on the fire instead of on him, and smiled. “Thank you. You didn’t need to share that with me.”
“Eh, it’s nothing. You asked, and I told you what’s what.”
“Not everyone’s as comfortable doing that. And certainly not even half as honest.” John folded his hands on his lap, and leaned forward to rest his forearms on his thighs. “It was Joseph. Tonight, back at my ranch. He wanted to talk. This typically isn’t a problem, but he decided to do what all older brothers believe is their right, I suppose.”
“What, like go over some fantasy football stats? Or more like rite-of-passage-type stuff, ‘cept the holy kind. ‘Cause he’s not gonna take you to a cathouse, or nothing.”
“Please never say that again,” John said, pinching the bridge of his nose.
“Uh, which part? The football, or the...er, the part where he’s trying to help you get laid, except not?”
“That one. You see, he wanted to talk expectations. My role in the family overall, and how he wants me to rise to them.”
“That’s uh, kinda harsh. Assuming he said some pretty rowdy shit to you.”
“Not all of it,” John admitted, “but it wasn’t what I wanted to hear. Usually when talking about regrets and hopes for the future, not all parties will be on the same page. He was on one, and I the other, and…I didn’t handle it as gracefully as I would’ve liked.”
“But did you think he was right?”
“I don’t know. It’s too soon to say, and I’m still not inclined to agree considering how he presented it to me.”
“But you know why he did that, right?”
John’s eyes were still on the fire, but caught his when he turned away from it. “Do you have any siblings?
Sharky shook his head. “Uh, no. Parents never planned for any of that, and they sure as hell weren’t planning on me. I’m one of those miracle babies. The kind that defy expectation, if you will. They swore up and down they’d used the pill, bagged that shit, and tried damn near everything to keep from throwing a bun in that oven. Still, nine months and some change later I popped out. Was as meant to be as my Grandmama swore I was, and…it’s weird in a way. Knowing that, and still knowing the other end of it too.”
“That you weren’t wanted?”
John was looking at him differently now. Catching something Sharky wasn’t sure even he’d see after checking five times in the mirror for it, and didn’t seem as cagey as before.
“I had someone that did want me. Wasn’t the one that had me to begin with, but that’s alright. Family’s not always blood - not directly. I got Hurk, I got my Auntie. Maybe even Xander, if she plans on keeping him around, but they give a shit about what happens to me. Let me know at least once a week too if they ain’t too busy to stop by, so it’s gotta be nice in some ways. Having brothers. Having that, at least.”
Taking in a deep breath, Sharky didn’t know how to tackle this next part. Knew he was probably going to be like a bull in a china shop, but he’d try. He had to.
“Now I don’t know enough about you all to really say much, so tell me to fuck right off if you need me to, but…they seem like the caring kind. Even though Joe’s got his whole family unit going on - his weird, not-a-cult, but kind-of-a-cult aside. And Jake’ll always give me the creeps, but I feel like you’d also warn me if he was setting me up to head out into the woods and fight me - mano a mano, ‘Most Dangerous Game’ style - so I think we’d be all right.”
“They’re not one, and he’s not about to,” John replied. “And maybe it isn’t your place to say.”
That shut his mouth. “…Sorry.”
“But you’re right.” Shifting his gaze to the ground, John’s next few words were softer, almost too quiet to hear. “Both of my brothers are all I have in this life. The ones that I would do anything for, and for years we truly thought we’d lost each other. There was no finding our way back after being separated and sent to different families. Different homes.”
John flexed his fingers, stretching them out before tightening them into a fist.
“I…was not fortunate in that regard. While I now had many opportunities open to me, I would’ve traded them in a heartbeat. Because there was evil in that house, and it was regularly visited upon me. And to cope, I needed an outlet. A way to take away what I couldn’t fix. What I couldn’t change, or stop, and make it all disappear.
“So, I turned to other sources. Went well out of my way to open myself up to new experiences. Things to excite, to make me feel…something. Anything, and no price was too great. I couldn’t see it for what it was, and was content to let it all eat me from the inside out. Because that was what gave me relief, and if they hadn’t found me when I needed them most…” John shrugged a shoulder. “I would’ve let it.”
“Fuck, I-uh, I’m sorry.”
“You don’t need to apologize. I didn’t share that to make you feel sorry for me, or to let it be an excuse. It was a little…honesty given, for honesty gained, if that makes any sense.”
Blowing out a breath, Sharky nodded. “Kinda. Think I get what you mean there.”
“And tonight, you were right. I needed an outlet, and you… You reached out to me without even thinking twice about it.” There was a sincerity there that surprised him. No dancing around it, no downplaying it. “You had no reason to open up your home to me, or do anything at all to help, but you did.”
“No reason not to.”
“Charlemagne. I haven’t given you much reason to do any of this, considering why we’re speaking at all to begin with.”
John had a point. One Sharky wasn’t going to argue, but he’d clearly overlooked a lot of the things he’d done to keep them on speaking terms. Or hell, even get friendly, because they were straddling that line, and had been ever since he’d stuck around to help him with the plane.
“Okay, so you did show up here on my doorstep. Used some strong words to get me to do some shit for you, and generally acted like a mega-dick. Admitting that’s the first step towards fixing it. ‘Cause my guess’s you wanna fix that, right?”
John pursed his lips, but said nothing. Just stared at him while his jaw tensed.
That had Sharky raising his eyebrows. “Dude, you seriously aren’t even gonna pretend to say yes to that? Not even try it?”
Glancing away, John closed his eyes. Took in a deep breath, and held onto it before sighing loudly.
“What the fuck?” Sharky muttered, watching him reach for his back pocket. “There’re like baby steps, and then you come in with this whole twelve step thing you’ve gotta work through, like it’s just that hard not to be a colossal d-”
“Done.”
Sharky paused as he took in what John held up. It was his phone.
Rolling his eyes at his confused look, John handed it over to him and pointed at the screen. “It’s gone.”
“What’s gone?” Sharky flipped through the folder John had pulled up, not sure what he was looking for. “Like the porn you knew I was gonna search for after taking this?”
“No, not that,” John replied, grinding his teeth. “The recording.”
“The…” Holy shit. “You got rid of it. Like, no back up, no nothing?”
“That was the only one.”
Gone. That weight - what was left of it - gone.
Sharky laughed. Laughed as relief settled deep into him, and it was the sweetest thing.
Sure, John could’ve been lying to him. Could’ve had three different places where he was stashing the file for a rainy day, but he found he believed him. He wanted to take his word for it, and found he didn’t have to jump through too many hoops for it either.
“That’s-that’s uh, thanks.”
“Thank you. For proving me wrong in a lot of ways.”
Proud motherfucker that he was, that statement nearly bowled Sharky over. But he seemed to mean it too, and he flashed John a bashful grin.
“So, uh going back to before. You need to be cool to others. Treat ‘em nice, especially if you know they’re in the middle of a rough patch, and you count too. You needed something to take the edge off, and with drinking out, there were only two options left. Sex, and burning shit, and seeing as I don’t even know what your type is, I went for the easy one.”
“Easy?” Giving him a curious look, John leaned towards him. “That arson would be the easier option at all’s fascinating to me, because then I have no choice but to ask.”
“…Ask what?”
“What is my type?”
He one-hundred percent felt John’s focus now, and might’ve felt his palms start to sweat. “You want me to guess?”
“I want you to try.”
That was a tougher question than it should’ve been, and all the answers Sharky thought he had promptly left the building.
“Uh…fuck. The ladies in the catalogs. Victoria’s Secret models. Sports Illustrated, but the swimsuit issue. Porn stars. Top dollar escorts,” he said, spit-balling for whatever a rich lawyer might like. Or Bruce Wayne. Same difference. “But the kind with nice shoes, and those big-ass fur coats.”
Or was he going more for what he’d like if he had boatloads of cash to blow? And a music video to make? Maybe. Judging by the look John was giving him, though, he didn’t agree.
“Jesus, I don’t know. You asked! So, I guessed. Thought I’d get something close if I kept on going.”
“Well, you weren’t.”
“Yeah, yeah. And you’re telling me you wouldn’t be dicking down every woman in the valley if they asked?” Sharky took a drink of his beer, and couldn’t help but grumble his next few words into it. “I know I would.”
“You’d what?”
He coughed, beer going right down his windpipe. That was the kind of shit that should’ve slipped out when he was buzzed, and he wasn’t even there yet. And judging from John’s response, wasn’t great to hear out loud either.
“Aw, fuck. Uh, sorry. Didn’t…didn’t mean anything weird by it. Just that you’ve got a lot of women looking - er, wanting - some real one-on-one time with you, that’s all. And if I were you, I’d take them up on it.”
John snorted, “Is that so?”
“I’m serious!” Sharky insisted, flashing an awkward grin. “Not to do any ego-jerking or anything, but you’re a good-looking guy, dude. Who’d blame ‘em for trying?”
He’d meant to look away after that, but John held his stare. Gave him a look that was like a Rubik’s Cube, and the more Sharky tried to pin down exactly what it was, the more he kept on scrambling anything and everything just to match up a single side.
“I see.” John wet his lips, dropping his eyes to his bandaged finger as he rubbed it together with his thumb. “Well, I’d hate to keep them waiting any longer than I already have. Or to disappoint them, but a few may need to wait their turn.”
“Why’d you say that?”
“Because surely their male counterparts deserve a chance as well? Seems only fair.”
John lowered his lashes as he looked over at him this time around, and Sharky must’ve blinked at him fifty times before his words registered.
“Oh. Oh,” he said, watching John nod his head along with him. “Well, it’s uh, I’m a…I don’t think I got anything right there, huh?”
Face burning hot, he crossed his arms and felt like kicking himself. Mostly for the whole conversation leading up to this, but now was a close second.
“Hard to be right about something you didn’t know.”
“Saying weird-ass shit to you’s not cool to begin with. Expecting a pity pass for it’s worse, and then there’s whatever the fuck this is, so I’m sorry. It’s lame as hell, but I’ve gotta get an apology out at least. And it’s probably the last thing you wanna hear or talk about, but you do whatever the hell makes you happy, long as no one’s getting hurt or nothing,” he said, wanting to get the words out, even if they weren’t neat. “And, we uh, we can talk about something else now.”
John laughed; the sound lighter than he expected. “Uncomfortable?”
“No. Kinda. Just…I’m not a talker. If you need someone to head on up, make a speech using all of the right words, making it pretty and all, you don’t go busting down my door. ‘Cause there’s ways of saying things, so it’s all meaningful and nice with no hurt feelings involved, and that ain't it. Shit, you’ve made a whole career out of it.”
Sharky tapped the bottle against his shin, and sighed.
“When I open my mouth, people usually start throwing stuff at me instead of listening. Beer, shoes, lawn ornaments, darts, you name it, I’ve dodged it. Or had someone try to hit me in the junk for it, so thanks for not doing that. And sorry again. Probably say that a couple more times before the night’s out.”
“…Hitting you would be the last thing on my mind. I promise you that.”
Dead serious, he wasn’t sure what to make of John’s tone, or the way he was looking at him.
So, after downing the rest of his beer, Sharky went for the next best thing. Nervous laughter, and more blushing like an idiot. He’d never stop at this rate.
Rubbing his hands together, he hopped up out of his seat after that. John was too intense to stare down for long, and he put some distance between them, set on hunting down the first major firework of the evening.
“Okay, so this one I usually save for the festies,” Sharky began, carrying it over in his hands. “It’s my own personal formula. Ran through it a few times trying to see if I could get the right amount of fizz, bang, and pop that everybody loves without losing a finger, an eye, or most of my hair again.”
“Did you now?” John snorted. “It’s a miracle it grew back.”
“More like both eyebrows, but yeah, ‘cause I need to keep this around,” Sharky replied, framing his jaw with his hand. The wink was extra, but that didn’t stop him. “Chicks dig guys with a little scruff to ‘em. The look’s ‘sexy renegade’, but the kind that’ll still treat you right.”
“No doubt.”
Looking him over, John tilted his head as he considered him. Let his attention focus in on him closely, until Sharky was on the verge of snapping his fingers in front of him to break the spell he’d somehow cast.
“It suits you.”
John could’ve slapped him, and it would’ve been less of a surprise than that. “Say what?”
“It suits you. Keep it to that, though. Any more and I think you’re guaranteed to lose more than an eyebrow the next time any of this backfires.”
In the back of his mind he registered John’s statement – an actual compliment which only confused him more – but didn’t get much further than that. That’s when he caught the smile John was now wearing. This one he’d earned for sure, and didn’t want to risk losing.
Kicking his brain back into gear, Sharky blew out a breath. “So, uh…let’s see. Lighting this up, so we can have one kick-ass party. Just getting right on that shit.”
The red rocket was stabbed into the ground to the left of the pit, and Sharky held out his lighter to John. He still had the matches from earlier, but this way was easier.
When all John did was give him a questioning glance, Sharky flicked his eyes towards the rocket. “Yo, you know this whole thing’s for you, right?”
“Me?”
“Yeah, you. So, you kick it off. I’ve got a firework in every color, though you might want to aim them all over yonder. Nearly lit the field up straight ahead of here last time, and my PO and I ain’t gonna see eye to eye on this if another starts. Cool?”
Dropping his attention to the lighter, John reached for it. Turned it over in his hands as the corners of his mouth curved up, and eventually aimed some of that glance his way.
“Cool.”
#far cry 5#sharky boshaw#john seed#jacob seed#john seed/sharky boshaw#I know I ultimately have control over what the characters say and do but I just didn't want to stop them here#and Jacob was a total surprise by the way#b/c I wasn't prepared for how much fun he was going to be to write#fanfiction#FC5 fanfiction#fic: I won't ask for much#fic series: we could make a home out of this
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running wish list of ideas for traits project
Charismatic/Irresistible - “Admire” interaction always produces positive result
Disciplined - 10-20% faster skilling, homework completion, and novel completion
Easily Impressed - when target of joke, compliment, story, or show-off, always has positive reaction
Genius - “make me smart” (I do this manually via BatBox right now); on top of that, 10-20% faster skilling (not homework or novels though). Ideally stacks with Disciplined.
Green Thumb - double nicenessmultiplier from Deco/Plants and Build Mode plants; 10-20% faster badge gain for gardening skill
Inappropriate - if LTR <45, “Flirt” interactions always fail
Natural Born Performer - “Tell story...”’ interaction always produces positive result; “Show Off” interaction always produces positive result
Neurotic - custom “worry” interaction a la TS3/4 that increases fun for them as the worrier, decreases fun for target, but guaranteed positive relationship impact if LTR is >40 OR target is Good/Neurotic; guaranteed negative if LTR is <10 OR target is Mean-Spirited, Evil, or Proper. 25-50% faster aspiration decay.
Perfectionist - after completing “art,” 25% chance of aspiration failure (i currently do this manually and it would be AMAZING to have it automatic!), reduce to 10% if Creativity is >8
Schmoozer - when STR is between 15-35, “Admire” interaction always produces positive result, unless target is Avant Garde or Grouchy.
Socially Awkward - when STR <50, “Talk/Chat” interaction always terminates after one back and forth
Unstable - upon waking up, 20(?)% chance of aspiration failure (already do manually)
* * *
@hexagonal-bipyramid @deedee-sims @jellymeduza @midgethetree
Y’all are so amazing and I wish I knew how to do what you do. I opened up several of the Traits Project files in SimPE that I thought might be semi-analogous and I can’t make heads or tails of most of any of it. Sometimes, if I’m lucky, I can see the line in the BHAV where there is an inventory check for the GUID of the relevant trait token, but I still can’t tell how it all fits together. Am I missing a tutorial out there on how to add new trait buffs? Is this so far above the skill level of your average bear that it’s not even advisable to attempt?
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Eurovision 2010s: 175 - 171
175. Jurij Veklenko - “Run with the lions”
Lithuania 2019
youtube
oh hai.
I mean, it’s pretty self-explanatory why Jurij made it this far. Like, man, MAJOR kudos for knowing your niche and milking the shit out of those horny middle-aged eurogays <3 And to be fair, in a field of similar acts, including both Farid Mammadov and Imri Ziv, it is Jurij who stands out as the *biggest* case of eyefuckery on this side of Teriazoume. I’d make a pun about Jurij channelling Evridiki, but Tumblr is a respectful PG-13 site now. 🤗
However, as self-explanatory as Jurij’s generous rank is, it’s almost as obvious why I can’t carry him further. “Run with the lions” is kind of a nothing song and wasn’t given a budget (I heard from a Lithuanian guy I know that LTR’s budget was €1.000 and that includes lodgings!!!), leaving Jurij to carry it by himself. Still, I can’t say this
has never failed to cheer me up. 🤗 Now imagine if Jurij returned with an actually GOOD song / a decent budget. BRING HIM BACK!!!
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174. Kristina - “Horehronie”
Slovakia 2010
youtube
Yes, I actually like Max Jason Mai more than Kristina. TEE HEE. 🤭
But I think Kristina is good too, no worries! Kristina is obviously very notable in that she ALWAYS pops up in those “the 10 most listened to videos” the official channel publishes every month. And truth be told, back in the day, at the fledgling age of thirteen-going-on-twenty-one, I too was smitten by this basic bop. With it’s easy ethno rhythm and tree dancing, “Horehronie” nothing short of enjoyable.
And then she ran into the Slovakian curse of “promising in studio, terrible live” the penance we all must bear for Tublatanka’s UNFAIR robbage (’94 juries = the WORST!!!). Oh well. 🤗
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173. Jacques Houdek - “My friend”
Croatia 2017
youtube
[2017 Review here]
Omg I’m taking out ALLL of the fanfavebeasts!! Shocking, i know!! JK, I know Jacques is disliked and rightfully so. He’s a pretty shit human. He has said some racist and homosexual things!!! (-Jeremy Collins). Liking Jacques, even ironically, always comes with the caveat that you cannot give him any rope (like the idiots that enable other “lovable” figures such as Trump, Farage and Rees-Mogg).
However, Eurovision doesn’t function like politics do and, I’m sorry, I just can’t *not* cackle at 1) Jacques convincing himself that “My Friend” is one of the most earnest, inspirational songs ever, just because it quotes Albert Einstein 2) EVERYONE, across any fanbase, universally believing that “My friend” is in fact one of the worst songs ever written. <3 It’s the same dichotomy we saw in “That’s how you write a song”, where EVERYONE is in on the joke except for the person who wrote the entry. Except, it is even more extreme here. Glorious.
Of course this culminated in Jacques, delusional as delusional does, convincing himself that people genuinely liked “My friend” for the music. He then gave us an even worse song in “The dream” and I instantly stopped laughing. 🙃 But fortunately Roko fell flat on his bicentennial face as it should have and I can laugh again.
That is the core of my Jacques sentiment, in a nutshell. As long as Jacques’s Eurovision schemes unfold like the average Wile. E. Coyote attempt at catching the Road Runner, as long as I can just sit back and laugh at his expense because he can’t help but fail himself, so long can I like him without any reservations. Which, fortunately enough, will be forever. 😈
Also, um that means “Lighthouse” is the highest ranked Croatian entry lmfao. What a spectacular decade.
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172. Valentina Monetta - “Maybe”
San Marino 2014
youtube
“Maybe” gets a lot of leeway from being the closing chapter in the Valentina saga and while it’s not *as* good, I still cherish it greatly. Valentina Monetta qualified for the final. Even though Serhat did too, her legacy isn’t cheapened by it, at all.
And yes, I recognize that “Maybe” is kind of really boring and that’s valid. However, I don’t care? Valentina singing “Maybe... this is it, this is real and I feel this is right, finally right” in a Grand Final remains a bone-chilling moment and nobody will ever be able to take that away.
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171. Robin Stjernberg - “You”
Sweden 2013
youtube
Reason #43 why 2013 is awesome: Sweden is mortal in it. and thank fuck it is, because that makes “YOUooUUooooOOUUu” so much more enjoyable. #DownWithSwedePrivilege
Not like it wasn’t to begin with. For starters, Melfest 2013 being won by a WILDCARD <3 Who barely made it in and out of Andra Chansen. <3 It’s SO INCOMPETENT, like you know, a messy “Where I Am”? It remains baffling to me that juries adored “You” so much because it really is three minutes of high-pitched screaming. Each time songwriters turn to “Strazdas” for inspiration, it truly is a blessing. 🤗
PS: by my count, there are now three remaining Swedish entries left in this ranking. Turning into this decade’s Ireland/France really made Sweden suck, huh?
#Eurovision#Eurovision Song Contest#Lithuania#Jurij Veklenko#Run with the lions#Kristina Pelakova#Horehronie#My Friend#Valentina Monetta#Maybe#Robin Sjernberg#You#Sweden#San Marino#Croatia#Slovakia#Jacques Houdek
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The Lustrous’ writing system
(contains minor and major spoilers from the manga!!)
Writing and reading are recurring elements in Houseki no Kuni. Phos’ first job is to write an encyclopedia and we know that the gems possess a vast library. Writing is so important that Peridot’s main occupation is making paper for other gems to use, just like Alex’s job is being a scholar and writing about Lunarians.
Also, while Admirabilis, Lustrous and Lunarians seem to share a common language, they do not share the same writing system (when showed a dépliant of the Moon facilities, Phos is unable to read it). So which script do the Lustrous use?
Since it’s sensei that educates the gems in writing and reading, we can assume that he taught them a type of script that humans used when he was originally created, so we can try to identify it starting from the scripts that exist today.
First of all, there are many types of writing systems, each with their own conventions, and they are classified according to what the different symbols of the system stand for. While linguists still kill each other in their sleep over classifications criteria, for the sake of this post I’m going to adopt a simplified version of Daniels’ classification. So we have:
Logographic: like Chinese, each symbol is a morpheme (a single unit of meaning, like 王, king)
Syllabic: like Japanese kana, each symbol is a syllable (け, か and こ, ke, ka and ko)
Alphabetic: like our Latin alphabet, each symbol is a distinct phoneme, vowels included (like A, B, C etc)
Abugida: or alphasyllabary, it’s in between Alphabetic and Syllabic, sequences of consonants and vowels are written as a unit like in Devanagari and Tibetan ( क् + प/ पे = क/ कॆ, K + a/e = Ka/Ke)
Abjad: like the Alphabetic, but symbols are only for consonants, like in traditional Hebrew and Arabic (ב ,ג ,ד, B, G, D)
Featural: the shape of the symbol resemble that of the sound, like in Korean Hangul (like ㅁ, M, that looks like a mouth)
Another thing to account for is the direction of writing: when the gems write they go top to bottom, vertically and right-to-left like we can see from these pictures:
Pic 1 is of one of Alex’s drawings: the paragraphs align on the right side of the paper, while there’s room left on the opposite side of the sheet, at the end of the second paragraph. The second pic is of Rutile: while it looks like they’re taking notes left-to-right, they could also be editing what they just wrote because the entire page is already densely written. Also notice how they write with a stylus, not a brush, because this detail will be important later.
Similarly, here we have Ghost, Sensei and Phos reading right-to-left, starting from what would be the last page from a Latin script user’s point of view. Notice how the titles of the books are on the left of the binding. Sensei is also reading right-to-left: this is from the panel where he’s teaching a new book to young Phos so he’s reading the first pages, the ones on the right.
So we have a top-to-bottom, right-to-left script, which hints at the gems’ writing system being based on an East-Asian script, since they’re the ones most often written vertically&RTL.
It would make sense for the Lustrous writing system to be Asian-based: the story is highly influenced by Buddhism and the mangaka is a Japanese woman. Yet, while I do believe that the script the gems use is Asian (or, well, similar to known Asian scripts) I don’t believe it’s Japanese. Let’s look at some examples:
(Lustrous script vs Chinese/Japanese cursive)
(regular Chinese/Japanese vs cursive form vs Lustrous script)
The gems’ script does resemble Japanese and Chinese cursive, but there are a few issues. First of all, cursive is hardly intelligible even for skilled readers, because it is regular writing that was drastically simplified and smoothed out to create a beautiful and abstract appearance: it’s more of an art form than an ‘actual’ writing system. Also, cursive is created by the movement of the brush never leaving the paper, so we would expect the gems to write with a brush when we know that they actually use a stylus.
Finally, since cursive is just a type of calligraphy, we would expect some of the writing we see in the series to look like regular Japanese and Chinese, like the script on the left in the first picture, yet it never does.
(Lustrous script vs Traditional Mongolian)
What we do have examples of are the tidy and geometrical vertical lines that characterize the Lustrous’ script. They write vertically in a continuous swirl of characters that is similar not only to Chinese Cursive but also to another East Asian alphabet, with whom the Lustrous script also shares a lot of other characteristics: Traditional Mongolian, a script derived from the Old Uyghur alphabet, a distant relative of the Egyptian hieroglyphs.
I have a couple of examples to raise my point and they have to do with the few images of single letters/symbols that we see in the series, like the one below, from ep.12.
I couldn’t find a higher resolution picture, but look at the paper sheets on the wall of Alexandrite’s room: the one on the left is about the different types of Lunarian apparitions, while the one on the right is about the island where the gems live.
If you squint your eyes a little, you can see that, above each portion of text in the image on the right is a symbol, probably a letter or a number to classify the different types of information. Same thing for the left image: there’s a symbol next to each ‘model’.
When Alex tests Phos’ knowledge, they do refer to numbers to classify the different types of models, so let’s say for a second that those symbols are numbers. Even if the picture is not super clear they are not angular enough to be Chinese/Japanese numbers: 一 十 二 三 四 五 六 七 八 九 十 (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10). Now look at Mongolian numbers:
They look swirly and rounded like those in the picture. Also, remember how Mongolian writes top-to-down? If you stack these numerals up in vertical sequences (like in dates or two+ digit numbers) they will acquire the same length of the ones showed in the picture.
Finally, we must also take into consideration the type of script. Remember that very long list at the beginning of this post? Well, how do the gems differentiate among symbols and sounds? Do they use an Alphabetic script like Mongolian or a Logographic one like Chinese? Do they use something different altogether?
Thanks to Phos’ never-ending curiosity, we do have one example of how the Lustrous’ write sounds and it’s from when Phos tried to speak with the Lunarians and heard them saying ‘fu’ and ‘a’:
When they write those sounds down, they use two different characters: one for ‘fu’ and one for ‘a’.
Now, the manga is written in Japanese and Japanese uses a syllabic script, so it can’t write single consonants. Instead, it attaches the vowel ‘u’ (or sometimes ‘o’) to a consonant to suggest that it should be read by itself. So we could think that the ‘u’ in ‘fu’ is mute and that the Lunarian said ‘f’ instead of ‘fu.’ However that ‘fu’ is used to make a joke just a couple of panels later, suggesting that it could also exist as a syllable on its own, not a single consonant.
This would change the type of script the Lustrous use, because if Phos wrote down ‘f’ and ‘a’ (instead of ‘fu’ and ‘a’), then it would mean that the gems use an Alphabetic script, like Traditional Mongolian. On the other hand, if Phos heard ‘f+u’ and wrote down the syllable ‘fu,’ then the gems’ script could be Syllabic, like Japanese or an Alphasyllabary like Tibetan.
As for other types of scripts, I don’t think they are using a Logographic one (like Chinese), because if they were, then Phos would have written all the different ways in which the sound ‘fu’ could be represented, just like when Japanese speakers tell each other which kanji to use to write their name correctly. This is because each symbol stands for a morpheme (a unit of meaning), not a phoneme (a single emission of sound), so the same unit of sound can be written in different ways.
Phos is looking at the sounds they just wrote to come up with an idea about what they could possibly mean: it would make sense for them to write down all the possible combinations of sounds for ‘fu’ and ‘a,’ not just one.
What we can say for sure is that the Lustrous’ script is not Abjad, because the vowels (like ‘a’) have an independent symbol. And speaking of independent symbols, if we come back to Mongolian for a second, we can see that the symbols for ‘initial fu’ and ‘independent a’ do look a little like what Phos wrote down:
If this were true, then the Lustrous’ script would work like Mongolian: an alphabetic script where letters have different forms depending on their position in a word (initial, medial, final or independent).
There is one problem with Mongolian, though: it’s written vertically, top-to-bottom like the Lustrous’ script, but left-to-right rather than right-to-left. So if the gems are indeed writing in some sort of descendant of the Traditional Mongolian script, then it was modified to allow right-to-left vertical writing, like in a mixture between Chinese cursive and Traditional Mongolian.
For example, the two Lustrous letters above look like a mirrored version of the Mongolian letters below, and that could explain how one system writes RTL and the other LTR.
Among all the existing writing systems that I have analyzed, I think that Traditional Mongolian and Chinese cursive are the ones that resemble the way the Lustrous write the most. Among the two, I believe Traditional Mongolian shares more features with the Lustrous script than Chinese cursive, except for the fact that Mongolian writes left-to-right.
If the gems really did write in a parent script of Mongolian, then it would be interesting to know if they also spoke a descendant of the Mongolian language or if sensei taught them Mongolian script because he was created in Mongolia, but this post is already long enough.
I’d love to hear what you think about the Lustrous script though, and if I made some mistake or forgot to mention something, feel free to add to this meta.
#houseki no kuni#land of the lustrous#hnk#meta#long post#writing#writing system#script#hnk headcanon#mongolian#linguistics#lustrous writing system#meta tag#best
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