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hazelfoureyes · 2 months

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Have you ever thought about the idea of a Clueless ace reader x ace alastor trying to figure out what all the fuss is about? Couple different ways it could go obviously but I feel like it would be a perfect comedy smut

Thank you for this meal. Okay I know this is LOOSELY based on your prompt, please forgive me. Can I add in that they be a little tipsy?

After a few drinks, you and Alastor do your usual teasing and mimicking of the others dramatic displays of physical affection. But, unusually, Alastor seems to be really invested in the joke tonight…

Warnings/promises: light smut (fingering), wrong kind of haha, sconces, bad Angel accent, Under 1500 words

maybe the tag list? Works list: @ xx-all-purpose-nerd-xx

Alastor list: @celestial-vomit , @amurtan

Fuck Joke Around and Find Out

The evening started with drinks among the group gathered at the bar. Everyone talking, sipping, leaning into each other to be heard better. Vaggie’s fingers playing with Charlie’s, Angel inching closer and closer to Husk until he was quite literally on top of him, to Husk’s obvious embarrassment. At some point, Angel took Husker’s hand, the two slinking down the hallway. Soon after, Vaggie not-so-discreetly followed a bouncing Charlie to their top floor home.

After realizing the couples snuck off, you turned to Alastor and asked, already smiling, “Oh I guess it’s our turn?”

Your giggling slipped into mutual cackles, his brows rose and he asked, “Your room or mine?”

You threw your leg over Alastor’s lap and straddled him, mustering your best Angel Dust accent, “Pssst rooms are for squares, baby.”

Normally, especially when having a little to drink, the physical barrier between each other was thin and easily toppled. An unspoken understanding had formed some time ago, allowing you both to relax a little more than usual when in close proximity. He still attempted his touchy intrusions to fluster and bother people, but he knew that didn’t work quite as effectively on you.

“Squares? Oh, not us.” A smirk, his head somewhat dramatically shaking a reinforced ‘no’, making his bobbed hair sway left and right.

When you start a pitifully-motivated grinding against him, losing balance and tipping backward, Alastor’s large hands come to the dip of your hips and still you. A laughed, accent-less, “Thanks, trying to do it like he did,” fell sloppily from your mouth, your hands going to his shoulders for extra security. Your head bent down, stifling another nervous giggle from spilling out. “I think this is exactly how Angel had Husk pinned. Not a convincin’ portrayal, pookie?” Your accent was shit, but he smiled all the same. His ears were pressed down and to the side, resting a little more against his skull than usual, something that seemed to happen often when he had a couple glasses. It looked more relaxed than his normal way of wearing them, but you never asked him about it.

Alastor’s finger tipped your chin upward, pulling you in for a kiss against his grin. When you huffed, fighting the awkward laugh, he swiped his tongue over your lips and slid into your mouth. A hum, as you relaxed into it. What a long joke this is, you think somewhere a little up and to the left of your liquor softened mind.

When alone together, you’d occasionally play around. Just mimicking what ridiculous things the other sinners had done recently, laughing and moving on to general gossip and conversation. Maybe the alcohol was dragging out the bit.

His hands pulled you forward, your little hip movements actually making contact with his crotch now. You hear yourself moan into his mouth before you even realize you’d made the noise.

Thinking becoming a little fuzzy, you pull back from him, “Oops. Sorry. Got carried away.”

“No need to apologize. What’s a little joking around between pals?”

You nod before a surprised shriek is forced out of you, Alastor pulling your hips down and starting to sincerely grind against you.

“I didn’t expect you to remember all the moves, Alastor.” Your hand came to your mouth trying to still the tremble of your lips as you spoke. Other hand now gripping his shoulder to stay upright. You’d never have played around with any one else but him like this. Too much confusion to deal with after. But, Alastor’s “playing” was so convincing. You weren’t minding it, to your surprise, but you weren’t sure you understood the source material as well he did.

His head fell back with a roar, “Being an infrequent lover doesn’t mean I am a bad one.”

Oh. Was the blush on your face noticeable in the dingy light of the parlor? You had never heard him say that word before. His hips were still moving, but the laughing stopped. It wasn’t unpleasant, in fact you found yourself sinking a little more, letting your weight settle fully. It earned you a sloppy half-smile from him. “That would make them experts, compared to us,” You motioned your head in the general direction of the stairs.

“You think so?”, he leaned up to kiss you, you leaned back a little, causing his lips to miss yours. A quick annoyed glare passed over his face before slipping back into a neutral stare, “Are you in the mood for a good joke tonight, dear? I wouldn’t be opposed to making you”, he grazed his nose against yours, “laugh.”

You let him capture your mouth with his, a surprisingly more intense kiss, before pulling away again when you caught another moan rising up, “I don’t mind a good laugh, now and then.” Did you-you say that or Angel-you?

The sofa cushions were pressing into your back before you could process what had happened. Alastor’s body was resting between your legs, which were spread open around him. His lips didn’t leave yours, one of his hands cradling your neck to trap you between him and his hungry mouth. The other was undoing the button of your pants and sliding under the band of your underwear.

His back was arched, his considerable height forcing him to bend over you if he wanted to continue the kiss, which he apparently did. Now on your back, you wiggled under him, awkward and uncertain what role you played anymore.

When his fingers slipped past your bottom lips and the mound of his hand ground into your clit, you pulled away from him and both hands shot to your mouth. You were aware you were in a public space but you couldn’t see anything past the sofa. Everything beyond him and the tattered chaise lounge was shadowy and lacking contrast. Even then, your heart was pounding.

When did the playing around shift? Was this—- did he think this was funny? His smile was strong against your neck still, but maybe not?

You splayed your fingers out to better hide yourself, embarrassed at how your hips rolled into his palm. Looking past your hands, you could see him staring down at you now, wide shoulders hiding you from the light of the sconces above. He had the same look as always in his eyes, nothing out of place. Cooly, he asked without actually wanting an answer, “Do you think this is what they’re doing now? Or is everyone already…”

A finger slipped down and into you, your legs clenching around his hips. You heard him sigh, before a second finger began to push in. Your hips lifted off the sofa and angled into his hand, welcoming the way he was pressing down and into you.

Oh, yeah, no.

A pent up moan tumbled past your lips when his fingers crooked up and pressed into the soft bundle of nerves just inside your entrance.

“What a curious laugh you have, my dear. Are my jokes that good?” He buried his face into the crook of your neck again when a voice stopped him from leaving the little marks he had been set on.

“I thought jokes were supposed to be funny. When is the funny part going to happen?”

Alastor’s ears were pin-straight into the air, hair stiff and sharp, as his face slowly turned to the side to see Niffty sitting at the bar.

”Oh, was I suppose to leave when everyone else did?” His hand slipped out of you and then in turn, your pants.

“No, Niffty, dear. That’s quite alright.”, Ears faced back and down, eyes half lidded and smile clearly forced, “We were just— playing around.”

“Really? Cuz it kinda looked like you guys were gonna fuck.” She hopped off the bar stool and scurried down the hall, “Please don’t dirty the sofa, sir.” echoing behind her.

You patted his shoulder, lifting yourself up on your elbows, “Can I be Husk next?”

I wrote this while washing dishes— the dishes aren’t very clean but neither am I

༻Masterlist༺

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mostlysignssomeportents · 1 month

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Too big to care

I'm on tour with my new, nationally bestselling novel The Bezzle! Catch me in BOSTON with Randall "XKCD" Munroe (Apr 11), then PROVIDENCE (Apr 12), and beyond!

Remember the first time you used Google search? It was like magic. After years of progressively worsening search quality from Altavista and Yahoo, Google was literally stunning, a gateway to the very best things on the internet.

Today, Google has a 90% search market-share. They got it the hard way: they cheated. Google spends tens of billions of dollars on payola in order to ensure that they are the default search engine behind every search box you encounter on every device, every service and every website:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/10/03/not-feeling-lucky/#fundamental-laws-of-economics

Not coincidentally, Google's search is getting progressively, monotonically worse. It is a cesspool of botshit, spam, scams, and nonsense. Important resources that I never bothered to bookmark because I could find them with a quick Google search no longer show up in the first ten screens of results:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/02/21/im-feeling-unlucky/#not-up-to-the-task

Even after all that payola, Google is still absurdly profitable. They have so much money, they were able to do a $80 billion stock buyback. Just a few months later, Google fired 12,000 skilled technical workers. Essentially, Google is saying that they don't need to spend money on quality, because we're all locked into using Google search. It's cheaper to buy the default search box everywhere in the world than it is to make a product that is so good that even if we tried another search engine, we'd still prefer Google.

This is enshittification. Google is shifting value away from end users (searchers) and business customers (advertisers, publishers and merchants) to itself:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/03/05/the-map-is-not-the-territory/#apor-locksmith

And here's the thing: there are search engines out there that are so good that if you just try them, you'll get that same feeling you got the first time you tried Google.

When I was in Tucson last month on my book-tour for my new novel The Bezzle, I crashed with my pals Patrick and Teresa Nielsen Hayden. I've know them since I was a teenager (Patrick is my editor).

We were sitting in his living room on our laptops – just like old times! – and Patrick asked me if I'd tried Kagi, a new search-engine.

Teresa chimed in, extolling the advanced search features, the "lenses" that surfaced specific kinds of resources on the web.

I hadn't even heard of Kagi, but the Nielsen Haydens are among the most effective researchers I know – both in their professional editorial lives and in their many obsessive hobbies. If it was good enough for them…

I tried it. It was magic.

No, seriously. All those things Google couldn't find anymore? Top of the search pile. Queries that generated pages of spam in Google results? Fucking pristine on Kagi – the right answers, over and over again.

That was before I started playing with Kagi's lenses and other bells and whistles, which elevated the search experience from "magic" to sorcerous.

The catch is that Kagi costs money – after 100 queries, they want you to cough up $10/month ($14 for a couple or $20 for a family with up to six accounts, and some kid-specific features):

https://kagi.com/settings?p=billing_plan&plan=family

I immediately bought a family plan. I've been using it for a month. I've basically stopped using Google search altogether.

Kagi just let me get a lot more done, and I assumed that they were some kind of wildly capitalized startup that was running their own crawl and and their own data-centers. But this morning, I read Jason Koebler's 404 Media report on his own experiences using it:

https://www.404media.co/friendship-ended-with-google-now-kagi-is-my-best-friend/

Koebler's piece contained a key detail that I'd somehow missed:

When you search on Kagi, the service makes a series of “anonymized API calls to traditional search indexes like Google, Yandex, Mojeek, and Brave,” as well as a handful of other specialized search engines, Wikimedia Commons, Flickr, etc. Kagi then combines this with its own web index and news index (for news searches) to build the results pages that you see. So, essentially, you are getting some mix of Google search results combined with results from other indexes.

In other words: Kagi is a heavily customized, anonymized front-end to Google.

The implications of this are stunning. It means that Google's enshittified search-results are a choice. Those ad-strewn, sub-Altavista, spam-drowned search pages are a feature, not a bug. Google prefers those results to Kagi, because Google makes more money out of shit than they would out of delivering a good product:

https://www.theverge.com/2024/4/2/24117976/best-printer-2024-home-use-office-use-labels-school-homework

No wonder Google spends a whole-ass Twitter every year to make sure you never try a rival search engine. Bottom line: they ran the numbers and figured out their most profitable course of action is to enshittify their flagship product and bribe their "competitors" like Apple and Samsung so that you never try another search engine and have another one of those magic moments that sent all those Jeeves-askin' Yahooers to Google a quarter-century ago.

One of my favorite TV comedy bits is Lily Tomlin as Ernestine the AT&T operator; Tomlin would do these pitches for the Bell System and end every ad with "We don't care. We don't have to. We're the phone company":

https://snltranscripts.jt.org/76/76aphonecompany.phtml

Speaking of TV comedy: this week saw FTC chair Lina Khan appear on The Daily Show with Jon Stewart. It was amazing:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oaDTiWaYfcM

The coverage of Khan's appearance has focused on Stewart's revelation that when he was doing a show on Apple TV, the company prohibited him from interviewing her (presumably because of her hostility to tech monopolies):

https://www.thebignewsletter.com/p/apple-got-caught-censoring-its-own

But for me, the big moment came when Khan described tech monopolists as "too big to care."

What a phrase!

Since the subprime crisis, we're all familiar with businesses being "too big to fail" and "too big to jail." But "too big to care?" Oof, that got me right in the feels.

Because that's what it feels like to use enshittified Google. That's what it feels like to discover that Kagi – the good search engine – is mostly Google with the weights adjusted to serve users, not shareholders.

Google used to care. They cared because they were worried about competitors and regulators. They cared because their workers made them care:

https://www.vox.com/future-perfect/2019/4/4/18295933/google-cancels-ai-ethics-board

Google doesn't care anymore. They don't have to. They're the search company.

If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/04/04/teach-me-how-to-shruggie/#kagi

#pluralistic #john stewart #the daily show #apple #monopoly #lina khan #ftc #too big to fail #too big to jail #monopolism #trustbusting #antitrust #search #enshittification #kagi #google

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superhaught · 2 months

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Just Seven Minutes

Pairing: Leighton Murray x Reader

Warnings: explicit smut (18+ MDNI)

Word Count: 3300, Part 1/?

Part 2

Reader and Leighton are paired up for a game of Seven Minutes in Heaven at a Theta party.

Explicit Content Below! Read at your discretion.

You made the mistake of watching from within the crowd. You should have known better. A frat party, a lockable storage closet, and liquor did not mix well.

Your stomach dropped when the shirtless fraternity brother pointed directly at you, “You. Come on.”

“No, no… I’m just watching…” you protested.

“Them's the rules, pal. If you watch, you are liable to participate.” Suddenly, people were pressing on your back and pushing you forward until you stumbled into the center of the circle with him. He looked at you, “alright, what are you into?”

“What?”

“Boys? Girls? Both? Anyone? Come on, what are you into?”

“Oh…” you could feel yourself shaking, your palms getting clammy, “girls…” you answered.

The guy caught a glimpse of a blonde head trying to escape the crowd of onlookers. He pounced on the opportunity, “Ah, not so fast, Murray. I pick you.”

Your stomach dropped further. Murray? Murray?

You were frozen. There was a slight scuffle amongst the people surrounding the blonde. You think you heard someone tell her, “it’ll be fine.” Then she was pushed into the center just as you were.

Leighton Murray. Rich. Brilliant. Popular. Stunning. Recently out as a lesbian among the student body. Recently out of not one, but two committed relationships. Likely only here because her roommates made her.

You knew these things about her partially by way of the Essex grapevine, and partially also because you had been nursing a painful crush on her since Freshman fall.

She didn’t make eye contact with you, so you resorted to looking at the floor and praying for a sudden meteor strike in Vermont.

The frat bro began, “Alright, you know the deal. Seven minutes in the closet, no less. What you do in there is your business. The timer will go off at seven minutes but no one will make you come out until one of you knocks. And the necessary disclaimer, we can hear everything and that’s what makes it fun for us. Now, you both have the option to agree or to chug the cup.” He gestured in reference to a full red solo cup sat upon a table in front of you. It was filled with mystery liquid, a combination of the participants' drinks. You can’t imagine that anyone in their right mind would choose to chug.

The brother turned to you, “okay, closet or chug? What’ll it be?”

You took a deep breath, “closet.”

“Hell yeah!” He grabbed your wrist and held your arm up in the air like a champion wrestler and the crowd joined in on cheering. Then, he faced Leighton, “and you? Closet or chug?”

Leighton rolled her eyes, “closet.”

The cheers became nearly deafening as the man lifted Leighton’s hand into the air as well and then you were both quickly ushered into the closet, the door locked behind you.

It was a ridiculously stupid game. You shouldn’t have even been entertaining it by standing in the crowd. You shouldn’t have even come to this party. The only people who enjoyed this were the ones tipsy enough to find it funny, or horny enough to use it as an opportunity. If the crowd outside didn’t hear anything worthwhile happening, they’d shout through the door to stress you out and be disappointed if you left the closet without having done anything. If they did hear a show, though… they’d cheer for you upon your exit and everyone would be talking about it for weeks.

You stepped toward the back wall of the closet and slumped against it, sighing, but not wanting to be the first to speak.

Leighton kept a respectful distance from you and just glanced around the dingy closet with a look of disgust on her face. She wasn’t looking at you with disgust. Well, she wasn’t looking at you at all. But then you realized that you were looking at her and you quickly averted your gaze.

Time seemed to move at a snail's pace. Neither Leighton or you wanted to say or do anything, apparently. You quickly resigned yourself to the fact that you would spend the next seven minutes locked in a closet with a woman who you were deeply attracted to without a word shared between you.

To your shock, she broke the silence, “you’re in my calc class, right?”

You looked up at her and almost choked when you tried to respond. You cleared your throat and tried to play it off, “Yeah, I am.”

She nodded, “thought so. I’ve noticed you before.” You hoped that she couldn’t hear your heart pounding.

“I… I’ve noticed you, too.”

She smiled and flipped her hair over her shoulder playfully, “hard not to. I’m amazing.”

That. That is what gets you everytime. She was amazing and she knew it and that was so fucking hot to you. You had to bite your lip to silence yourself.

She continued, “for the record, I think this whole situation is bullshit.”

“Uh, me too.” You agreed.

The blonde lazily examined her manicured nails as she spoke, “with that being said, I would rather make the most of it than not.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean… we could ya know, see what happens…”

Your jaw dropped, “wait… are you saying that we should… what? Make out?”

“Well, do you want to?”

Your head was spinning. Of course you wanted to. But now she was standing right there and you couldn’t make yourself speak.

She shook her head, “nevermind… forget it.” She moved to take a step away from you and all you could think to do was to reach out for her. You gently grabbed her wrist and stopped her.

“Wait,” you began, “I didn’t say ‘no’...”

She turned and looked at you, actually meeting your eyes for the first time. She was anxious, too. You could see it now. You dropped her wrist.

“Leighton…” her name tasted so sweet on your tongue, “I… I won’t kiss you… unless I know that you really want it…”

You watched as her eyes flitted down to your lips then back, “I want it… I want you… does that answer your question?”

This had to be a dream. You were certain of it. But then, it was only just a dream and nothing bad could happen from kissing Leighton Murray in your dreams.

“It does…” you respond.

Leighton stepped a little closer to you. Your shoulder blades pressed against the wall behind you. She leaned in, her lips suddenly only a couple inches from yours. She locked her gorgeous blue eyes on yours, waiting. She wanted you to go for it.

You whisper shakily, “you’re sure?”

The corner of her mouth raised into a cheeky smile and she nodded emphatically.

Between your blood pounding in your ears from the anticipation, people outside of the closet cheering lewdly, and the tickle of her warm breath on your chin, you couldn’t think anymore.

You snake a hand to the back of her neck and twine your fingers into her soft, blonde hair as you make the move to pull her in the rest of the way and close the distance. You hear her breath hitch as your lips connect, and the two of you quickly find a comfortable position for your bodies to be in. You bring your other hand to the small of her back, holding her over her blouse. She leans her weight onto you as she drapes her arms around your shoulders and buries her fingers into your hair.

You exchange a few tender kisses as you shift to cradle the side of her face in your hand and kiss her softly. Feather light brushes of your sensitive skin against one another as you pull her just a little closer by her waist. But the softness isn’t enough and soon, all you can feel is heat and you begin to deepen the kiss. Your lips part and you lightly graze your tongue against her bottom lip. She shudders and allows you entry, meeting your tongue with hers in a short-lived fight for power that she quickly cedes.

You let out a moan from your throat that she only echoes. She presses herself against you more forcefully and kisses you harder and you match her at every step. Everything felt like it was on fire. You couldn’t help it, you had to pull back for a second to catch your breath. Your chest heaved and you opened your eyes to find hers.

“Fuck…” she whispered.

You caress your thumb over her cheek and stare incredulously at her, “do you… want to keep going?”

She chuckled lightly, a genuine smile forming on her face, “I do… Do you?”

You nod, “yes… God, you’re so hot.”

She smirked and captured your lips in a bruising kiss, coming at you with passion that made you melt. She let her hands roam your body now and you could feel her happily learning the feel of your skin and muscles beneath your clothes.

You want her without any shame now. Nothing mattered other than the gorgeous blonde and her pleasure. You grab ahold of her hips and back her up toward a low shelf in the closet. A simple swipe of your arm knocks everything off the shelf and then you lift her onto it and step in between her legs.

She gasps in surprise but responds quickly by wrapping her legs around your hips and you keep kissing her desperately. Leighton moans and pulls you even closer to her by grabbing your ass. Her hips start to rock, seeking any amount of friction she can get by grinding against you.

You groan and match the movement of her hips. You come away from her lips and start kissing along her jawline and down the side of her neck. Your thumb tilts her head by moving her chin and you apply pressure with your tongue to the sensitive spots that make her squirm, then nip at the tender skin with your teeth.

She holds you by the hair at the nape of your neck and sighs as she tilts her head back and away, giving you even more access to her. Her back arches and your arm moves to support her back and you slide your hand under her shirt and touch her skin. You faintly hear the seven minute timer outside of the closet go off but you’ve no intention of stopping now.

You glance at her blissed out face and breathe, “you’re so fucking gorgeous,” as you kiss around her throat and give your attention to the other side of her neck, pulling her hair lightly to move her head in tandem with you.

Her continued sounds in reaction to you are heavenly. Her little gasps and whimpers drown out the sound outside of the little closet and she becomes your whole world. She squeezes your back and digs her nails into you, desperate for more of you. She tries to say so with words, “I need… I… need…”

“I can keep going…” your press another kiss onto her neck and then her collarbone.

“Please…” she gasps.

You bring your lips closer to her ear and whisper your desire, “I want to go down on you, Leighton…”

You feel her body react to your words as a wave of arousal washes over her.

“Oh… god,” Leighton moans, “holy shit…”

“Do you want that?” You kiss along the edges of her ear, touching your lips to the hidden spots along her hairline.

“Yes… yes… please…”

“Yes? You’re sure?”

“Yes!” she bucks her hips against you out of desperation and whimpers, “please…”

You smile and return to her lips, kissing her hungrily as you slide your hands around to her waist and push her shirt up, exploring her skin. Your touch sends shivers through her body and raises goosebumps. She kisses you back with fervor but then lets out a quiet whine when you pull away to begin traveling elsewhere. Her disappointment is quickly eased as you start kissing down the front of her body and lower yourself to your knees between her legs.

You lift up her shirt as you descend and start pressing kisses directly onto the skin of her abdomen. She giggles lightly from the faint tickle of your movements and you smirk as you teasingly continue for a second longer.

She looks down at you with flushed cheeks. Her chest rises and falls rapidly and you take a moment to really admire her in this state. She licks her pink, swollen lips and runs a hand through her hair to push it back out of her face. Her legs shake just ever so slightly. She’s incredible.

You breathe her name again, savoring it, “Leighton…”

You reach out and tuck some of her hair behind her ear and then trail those fingers down the center of her body till they reach the button of her jeans.

You look up at her wordlessly and she nods her head. You undo the button and the zipper and start to ease her jeans down her legs as she lifts her butt off the shelf for a second to help you. Your eyes follow the denim as it slides down her thighs but then you see the lacey, pink panties she’s wearing and your heart skips a beat. You moan at the sight and she smiles. She grabs a hold of your hair again and makes you look back at her face, “like what you see?”

You bite your lower lip and nod, wide eyes staring at her.

“Finish taking them off…”

You grab the waistband of her underwear and pull them down, too, until her legs are free of the clothing and you drop the fabric onto the ground beside you.

You adjust your position so that you’re perched on your knees right between her legs and you start to plant gentle kisses on her inner thighs.

She keeps her fingers in your hair but leans her head back as you kiss her and sighs happily.

You grab ahold of her thighs and pull her a little bit more forward, til she’s perched on the edge of the shelf, and then you finally press your face in between her legs and give her your mouth.

She moans and immediately starts to rock against you, matching your movements. You open your eyes and look up at her with a sly grin on your face as you drag your tongue through her slick and then start to focus on her clit.

“Oh…” she breathes, “fuck… that’s so good…” she meets your eyes and lets out a desperate groan.

You keep going and can tell how pent up the blonde is. She holds onto your hair with one hand and white knuckles the edge of the shelf with the other, her ankles crossed behind your back.

This act of having needy, fiery, semi-public sex is so vulgar and so hot. You can’t fathom how this is even real. How are you going down on Leighton Murray in a frat house closet right now?

You felt like you could get off without her even touching you. Her taste, her breathy moans, her grinding motions against your mouth were more than enough.

She throws her head back, “fuck fuck… I need more… fingers….please…”

You nod your head slightly and shift your hand at her request, slowly sliding your middle finger inside while licking her clit rhythmically.

She takes your finger with a moan and then you effortlessly slide your ring finger in, too. You curl them and press the pads of your fingers against that ultra-sensitive spot and she starts to clench around you.

You time the movements of your fingers and tongue expertly and you can feel her climb to her peak quickly, “fuuck… ohmygod I’m so fucking close don’t stop don’t sop!”

She holds onto your head for dear life and you maintain your pace and then she finally releases, coming onto your fingers hard. Her entire body tenses, muscles shaking from holding herself in a precarious position. She moans loudly, head falling back against the wall behind her. You don’t quite reach an orgasm of your own but you feel pure bliss at giving her that strong of a reaction.

Her eyes shut and her face softens to a weak smile as you clean her up with your tongue and suck your fingers clean while you stand back up.

You step in between her legs again and reach out to embrace her. She accepts the contact, wrapping her arms around your chest and leaning her head on your shoulder. The affection you feel for her is easy to come by and you can’t help but send up a silent prayer that this won’t be a one time thing.

Your hand holds the back of her head as she leans on you and you caress your thumb over her soft hair. She lets out a happy hum and squeezes you a little.

“Wow…” she breathes.

“Mhmm…” you agree, “you’re incredible.”

“Me?’ She laughs, “I didn’t do anything!”

“You don’t have to.” You don’t hesitate to press a tender kiss to the top of her head and rub soft circles onto her back.

“You’re sweet…” she smiles, looking up to meet your eyes, “and freakishly good at that…”

You laugh and shake your head, feeling your cheeks flush.

“You must have a lot of practice.”

“Then you’ll be shocked to find out that I really don’t…”

She raises an eyebrow in doubt, “no way. I don’t believe you.”

You shrug your shoulders, “believe it or not, it’s the truth.”

She shakes her head, incredulous, and tucks her head back against your shoulder. You hear her take a deep breath in through her nose and nuzzle into you a bit. It makes you smile and feel butterflies in your stomach. You wordlessly return the gesture by taking a deep breath against her hair, closing your eyes and letting her undoubtedly expensive conditioner flood your senses. She smells like good espresso and silk.

“We uh… should probably get out of here, huh?” you ask.

She groans, “god… don’t remind me that I have to face everyone out there.”

“At least, it will be a disgustingly positive reaction…” you grimace at the thought, “if it helps, I will definitely stick with you for as long as you want me to.”

She nods, “I’d like that, thanks.”

You bend down slightly and grab her discarded clothes and pass them to her. Leighton smiles gratefully and shakily gets down from the weirdly convenient shelf and holds onto your bicep for balance as she gets back into her underwear and jeans.

When standing normally, she’s back to being a few inches taller than you. She looks down to meet your eyes as she buttons her pants and tucks her shirt back in. You’re gently holding her waist and getting totally lost in her brilliant blue eyes.

She flips her hair over her shoulder and rests her hands on your shoulders as she leans in and kisses you sweetly. Your lips connect and the tenderness of it surprises you in a good way. You cradle her jaw in your hand again and rub your thumb along her cheek, kissing her a few more times.

She pulls away and smiles, “you’ve made my night.”

“I’m glad,” you reply, “you made mine, too.”

You take another few moments to gather yourselves and then you brace yourself for the reaction from the crowd as you knock on the closet door to be let out.

Next Chapter

#leighton murray #leighton murray x reader #slocg #leighton murray fanfiction #leighton murray smut #smut #smut with plot #18+ content #18+ mdni #mdni #my fanfiction #my writing #original writing

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bogleech · 3 months

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For me the most disappointing thing about Palworld is the designs being so boring and bland that you'll never have cause to review them. We deserve better from a creature collecting game, especially one making this much money!

Yeah here's the most opinion I can possibly muster on any of them:

DUMUD: it's a big fat shark-like mudskipper and that's a good concept, it just doesn't really have the charm of any Pokemon it shares anything in common with.

WUMPO: resembles the fur-wearing "werewolf" pokemon that got cut from the first or second generation, crossed with Tangrowth. One of the more okay designs because those are two good pokemon.

SIBELYX: this is supposed to be their Gardevoir I guess and I think it's an owl? Or is it a moth? Well it ends up one of the slightly cooler looking ones a little less obviously derivative of specific pokemon. Maybe they were also going for a Dimitrescue knockoff with the hat

CAWGNITO: an alright one because plague doctors just generally look cool. However the simple formula of plague doctor + actual bird would have been far too obvious and underwhelming as a Pokemon. There's no novelty or twist to this.

HANGYU: this is the one that's a ghostly noose canonically used to execute people. It's a funny little send-up of the darker pokemon pokedex entries, though the design is uninspired compared to object-based creatures in Pokemon, Digimon or any other monster franchise I can think of.

LOVANDER: this is one that fucks people, and they possibly borrowed the topography of Salazzle's official model. I want to think they did intend it to be freaky and unwholesome looking with the rubbery goblin hands, but I suspect they intended something actually sexy by furry monsterfucker standards and just weren't good at it. Yes I know that likely does not stop people from being into it anyway.

TEAFANT: I was going to say this is the only pal that looks better than its closest equivalent Pokemon, because they would be Cufant, and I gave Cufant a pretty negative review back in the day.

......But actually, now I kind of like Cufant. A lot, come to think of it! Teafant is cute and competent in the most paint-by-numbers possible way. It's what almost anyone would draw in ten seconds if asked to make a cute marketable teacup elephant pokemon. Cufant is an awkward, messy design but it is comparatively cute in a goofy, dorky way that's rare among the Pals, and more importantly, it is unique. I don't think they used AI to generate any Palworld models (the tech isn't there yet) but I can see why people assume they used AI just to get the initial ideas, because it's very easy to find people who have more a more creative eye for character design. I'd say even if not ESPECIALLY people with zero experience in art would have made the Pals look more interesting.

#palworld #pokemon

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wing-shot-first · 2 years

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12, 27 :)

Who would be most likely to-

Start an argument: Dante and the Achilles twins.

Be asked for advice: Pop! They're the mom friend basically so everyone goes to her with their problems. He doesn't mind at all and helps best xe can ^-^

#ask game answered #mals pals: Among us Anti >:(#coopers characters #also btw Pop uses any pronouns! Typically He/She/They but is fine with neos!

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bitterkarella · 5 months

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Midnight Pals: 2 Fisted Tales

Stephen King: hey patricia is it true you used to write comics? Patricia Highsmith: [long cigarette drag] Highsmith: who told you that

King: well, i just heard- Highsmith: was it stan lee? Highsmith: musta been stan lee Highsmith: never met a cat who talked so much Highsmith: might as well be a dame with all the yap yap yappin

Dean Koontz: wowwwww did you really meet stan lee, patricia? Highsmith: yeah Koontz: wowwww! what was that like? [flashback] Stan Lee: hey there comics fans its me, stan lee Lee: how bout a date? Highsmith: no dice

Poe: steve King: i just thought she'd like to tell us about her Poe: steve Poe: just no Poe: no King: ok fine Barker: i'm gonna hear the comic story Poe: CLIVE NO

King: ah but patricia i think we'd all like to hear a comics story Patricia Highsmith: i ain't gonna tell no comic story King: well maybe I can't convince you King: but I bet I know someone who can! Alan Moore: [appearing in a flash] who dares summon the arch magus? King: the arch magus! Poe: the arch magus! Koontz: the arch magus!

Moore: speak! what boon ask ye of the arch magus? King: hey alan you've worked in comics King: how about you tell patricia that comics aren't stupid Moore: Moore: i cannot tell her that

Moore: comics are the bane of my existence! a curse upon them! Highsmith: now this guy, this guy i like Highsmith: he's got a real noodle in his noggin Moore: the arch magus would do well to hear your counsel, mortal Highsmith: sure, we could jaw a bit

Highsmith: how you feel about snails, archmagus? Moore: be these your familiars? Highsmith: "familiars" Highsmith: listen to this cat

Highsmith: ok fine you mooks wanna hear about my comics Highsmith: i'll tell ya Highsmith: but only cuz i'm here among bros Highsmith: long as its just dudes Highsmith: cuz these stories Highsmith: they get a little rough Highsmith: and you know how dames are

Highsmith: so this story's just for us dudes Highsmith: so franz Franz Kafka: what? Highsmith: you gotta go Kafka: huh? what? Kafka: why? Highsmith: you just gotta go Kafka: i don't understand Barker: oh my god franz get a clue Poe: clive

Highsmith: submitted for the approval of the midnight pals Highsmith: i call this the tale of the crime puncher Highsmith: it's about this real swole square headed guy who punches criminals Highsmith: pow! punch! bam! Highsmith: that's what comics are all about

Highsmith: so there're these 2 palookas who fight crime Highsmith: named steve and ploopie Barker: i'm sorry what Highsmith: steve and ploopie Barker: steve and WHAT Highsmith: what, you got cabbage in your ears? ploopie Barker: Barker: i'm sorry WHAT

Highsmith: anyway steve and ploopie gotta do some punching Barker: there's a lot of punching in these stories Highsmith: that's what kids want in comics Barker: huh sure yeah Barker: Barker: i'm sorry steve and WHAT Poe: let it go, clive

Highsmith: so this world war i playing ace crashes into a polish swamp Highsmith: when he dies, it creates a big mud monster Highsmith: who goes to america to harass some kid for his model air plane Barker: i'm starting to see why you didn't want to tell these stories Poe: CLIVE

Highsmith: i didn't just do action comics tho Highsmith: i wrote educational ones too Highsmith: like the two-fisted tales of oliver cromwell Highsmith: or don't mess with galileo Highsmith: or catherine the great takes out the trash

King: why didn't you stick with comics, patricia? Patricia Highsmith: eh you know how the comics biz is King: but I've heard its actually a growth industry Highsmith: is that so King: yeah they tell me that there's lots of opportunities in comics for girls Highsmith: ugh pass

#midnight pals #the midnight society #midnight society #stephen king #clive barker #edgar allan poe #dean koontz #patricia highsmith #alan moore #franz kafka #stan lee

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ozdicaff · 1 year

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INTRODUCING: CHILDRENS SHOW AU!

WAY too excited to share these guys !!!! im super proud of these designs <3

CTS!Y/n and information about the AU under the cut!

In this AU, FazCo is a company running a TV channel network called FazBS, where each animatronic has their own show!

Sun's show airs at mornings and is all about getting energized and hyped up for the day, its similar to LazyTown with it's cartoon-esc violence and slapstick humor, with scenarios that make little sense, but are entertaining to watch anyway! only very simple language is used to make everything understandable for younger kids, with cameos of the other animatronics! his show was extremely popular, just above Roxy's and below Monty's in popularity.

Moon's show airs around bedtime and is focused on getting kids to go to sleep, with a soothing music box soundtrack, Moon's trance-inducing voice, and more advanced dialogue that makes kids zone out, its known for how fast it puts kids to sleep, even the especially rambunctious ones fall asleep out of boredom. While his show wasn't as talked about nor popular as sun's, it was highly rated among parents.

[descriptions for the glamrocks' shows will be added later when i draw refs for them too! :D]

Well, that was before the entire channel went downhill after FazCo fired all of its human workers.

Yeah, despite the channel's success and being extremely profitable, this was the FazCo's end-game from the start. Being able to AI-generate children's content without having to pay a single human, FazCo thought that their animatronics have already learnt enough from being show hosts for more than 10 years now, but they thought wrong. The gradual decline in quality was felt by the parents, and after Bonnie's show was suddenly cancelled- even the kids noticed how bad things were getting.

[psst, i'll go into detail about how each show was effected by this change in another post!]

Parents called in, demanding the shows they grew up with to be good again, and it wasn't just nostalgia speaking.

So, in an uncharacteristic turn of events, FazCo responded! They said that Freddy's, Monty's, Roxy's and Chica's shows were going to have human staff again!

...what they neglected to mention, was that they were pulling funding from Foxy's show, and cutting Sun's and Moon's budget in half to make up for this change.

Sun now has to re-use and repurpose old props to make up for his inability to get new ones, buying with his now super limited budget cheap D.I.Y kits to make crafts with- not to mention, without having any human staff around, he had to play every sound effect in real time- because the new S.T.A.F.F bots FazCo got have ZERO idea what comedic timing is. Needless to say he was under a lot of pressure, his show was pretty well liked by both kids and parents, and he didn't want to disappoint them. He had to change a lot with the absence of human actors and no narrator to have a solid dynamic with, calling on his pal Chica often jus to have another person on the show.

Moon's show however, was doomed from this change. Y'see, his show featured a narrator, posing as a curious soul and asking Moon thoughtful questions he can answer in a way kids can digest, Mister Rogers' Neighborhood style, and with no off-screen voice he can respond to, Moon's show felt incredibly eerie, as his true thoughts were left free with no guidance from his narrator buddy. He started acting stranger and stranger, going on derailed existential tangents accidentally, making a few jabs at FazCo here and there from frustration. The kids didn't understand any of it, but the parents found it off-putting, and complained.

Eventually, Moon's show was put on a permanent hiatus, after a particularly bad episode where 'moon truly let his rising anger at FazCo loose', as an article described it. No recording was archived of this episode, and any attempts to post it is quickly struck down by FazCo.

They've re-run old episodes of his show for about 6 months now, with no sign of moon coming back.

This, however, is when Y/N comes in! after half a year of dwindling ratings of sun's show, and decreasing profits in merch sales, they caved in and hired a single narrator! after not being able to retrieve their old narrator, due to "a small disagreement."- they brought you, surely, they don't expect you to single handedly bring back sun's show from ruin!? ...well, did they?

who fuckin knows you'll find out in my [soon to be written] fic lol

#fnaf daycare attendant #fnaf security breach #sundrop #moondrop #security breach #sun fnaf #fnaf au #sb moon #fnaf sun #fnaf sunny #childrens tv show au #CTS!moon #CTS!sun #CTS!y/n #my au #myart #childrens show au

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