Well she is. 21 babies in just over a year to be exact.

Kristina has authored a book titled Baby's Diary. News18Join our Whatsapp channel

The feeling of motherhood is a special one and many experience it multiple times, choosing to have more than one child. Kristina Ozturk, the wife of a wealthy Turkish individual, stands out in this regard. Despite being only 26 years old, she has already become the mother of 22 children via surrogacy. Originally from Russia, Kristina, along with her millionaire businessman husband, 57-year old Galip, welcomed 21 surrogate babies into their lives between March 2020 and July 2021. Despite this remarkable number, Kristina expresses her desire for even more children.

Kristina’s eldest child, an eight-year-old daughter named Victoria, was born naturally from a previous relationship. Despite facing criticism for what some perceive as “buying babies,” this mother from Georgia remains steadfast in her decision to expand her family. Kristina has openly expressed her ambition to have even more children, aiming to reach a three-digit figure.

Her plans face challenges as her Turkish businessman husband was imprisoned in 2023 on charges of money laundering and document falsification. Fortunately, Kristina is supported by a team of 16 live-in nannies to assist her while her husband serves an eight-year sentence behind bars.

Kristina first met Galip in a club in Moscow, Russia and started a relationship in spite of the 31 year age difference between them. They started living in a lavish three-story mansion in Batumi, Georgia. In February last year, Kristina had paid Rs 1 crore 43 lakh to the surrogates.

Kristina has also authored a book titled Baby’s Diary, in which she shares her journey as a mother of so many children. She reflects that while much has been written about parenting, every day parents seek valuable insights from her to provide the best for their children.

Kristina’s unconventional path in parenting hasn’t been without challenges. She revealed an incident where one of the surrogate mothers expressed a desire to keep a baby after giving birth. As the baby’s genetic makeup consisted of Kristina and her husband’s DNA, the child rightfully belonged to them.

Although Kristina has openly discussed her aspiration for at least 105 children, she now intends to hold off on further steps toward that goal until her existing children are older. While she hasn’t dismissed the possibility of becoming pregnant herself again, she acknowledges the impracticality of doing so with a household full of young children.

Okay thanks! So here's a long one (my poor brain lol, I should be writing on a story but here I am)

So here's my thinking:

Our girlie had finally fully fallen in love with Alexander, despite his possessive and violent streak, She's happy and her two babies are toddlers now. Yes, she missed some things from the future and her family oh how she would love for her parents to meet her twins but she was happy that was until Alexander met the younger, prettier Miss Roxanna and married her, Miss Girlie still young but is not 20 years old anymore and has kids now. It didn't get to her at first, she knew she was number one but Alexander began to make more time for Roxay and less for her. Roxanna wasn't mean per say but she would brag about her beauty and how well Alexander treated her, the gifts she gets to anyone who would listen. He would take turns sleeping in bed with them more so Roxanna. The nights she slept alone she would cry, from the pain of being away from home, from being abandoned

Everything hurt especially when Alexander took Roxanna on an expedition to conquer another kingdom that lasted a year and they came back with a baby on Roxy's hip, Girlie's children seemed so taken by their new sibling and their 'Second mother'. She didn't think things could get worse after a night of sex with Alexander, Roxanna found out that she was from the future that she so foolishly would write down in a secret journal she was sure was hidden well. Roxanna was gonna tell Alexander it was in her eyes. It left no choice but for girlie to run.

She ran far and fast in the night only stopping until her feet were bleeding and the second home she knew was nothing but a tiny Castle. She fell to her knees, clenching the bark of a tree and looking up at the stars that light the sky, cursing at the god's cruelty, finally making everything feel alright. What made her think it was a blessing in disguise was just lore to a painful trick. She sobbed, begged for the gods to show her mercy, to take her home to her real home, and away from this.

So they did, she awoke in her dorm bed like it never happened, like Everything that had happened was a dream, She knew it wasn't but to stop from missing her friends she made, her husband, and her kids, she received it as such. she lived the life she was supposed to have.

It worked after a while until a familiar sickness plagued her.

She prayed to the gods that what she thought wasn't it but the + sign on the pregnancy tests proved her theory. She was pregnant with Alexander the Great's baby in the 20th century.

I agree that you should be writing a story, but I'm glad I can read your thoughts! :)

I like your thinking, although I plan to make the situation different. Roxanna would have been around sixteen years old in the real story when she met Alexander and apparently twenty when she married him. And our girl's age is not stated, but I assume they would be the same age or similar ages. But for reasons of time and the fanfic itself, I'm going to change Roxy's age.

The relationship between the two will be explained when they first meet, but they get off to a tense start, in part because of Roxanna. Will they become friends? Maybe, but that's difficult given Roxanna's jealous and possessive nature and that's canon.

And Roxanna will love Alexander, she will fall in love with him. And Alexander is not in love with her, he is in love with our girl.

And then there's the whole issue of succession and pregnancy. Y/n will get pregnant first, I've already decided that and this pregnancy, my friend, will cause A LOT. Not just between Roxanna and Y/n but between the generals. Especially Perdiccas.

And, oh, the relationship of the twins and Roxanna's son will be described, and dare I say it, will be strained. Mainly because I intend to make the fanfic have more than one ending.

Oh, oh… Y/n pregnant with Alexander will be complicated, especially in the 21st century. Can you predict the drama and all the chaos? Even more so when Alexander moves into the 21st century.

Our girl desperately needs a psychologist.

I enjoyed reading your thoughts and feel free to send me more or any requests for a love letter or prompt or even concepts! I love reading your thoughts and theories!

~ Lady L

Congrats on the new baby!

How was delivery? Was is it much different from your first pregnancy?

How's the shift from 1 to 2 children? How did/does your oldest daughter respond to a new baby?

A lot of questions I know but I'm 34 weeks pregnant right now and have a 20 month old daughter so I kinda relate to your story and am curious/nervous.

Any tips on handling the first weeks with 2 under 2?

Thanks a lot!!

Thank you and congratulations! You’re going to have so much fun!

Delivery was wonderful. My first was a failed homebirth/hospital transfer that ultimately ended up being a pretty terrible experience all around. This delivery was an elective scheduled induction (which I never thought I’d do) and it was wonderful. My midwife delivered, my husband caught the baby, she breastfed immediately and latched like a champ, and we got to go home after 24 hours. It was amazing truly and knowing when I was going to the hospital and that my midwife would be there brought me a lot of peace.

I did not worry about our transition from 1-2 kids logistically. I worried a lot that my second would be colicky like my first and thankfully she’s not. Honestly the only difference for me with adding in a second kiddo is that I have to remember the carrier when we go places and stop to breastfeed occasionally. Obviously this will change as my second gets more mobile and opinionated. My oldest is absolutely obsessed with the “bebe” and wants to help change her and hold her and pat her bum. The only struggle we’ve had is that she’ll occasionally want me to put down the baby and hold her instead but overall she’s done very well.

As far as tips go, the things that have helped us the most are..

- over the top praise my oldest when she is kind to the baby (oh my gosh you’re the best big sister ever!! Baby D is so lucky to have you!! She loves you soo much!!)

- babying our toddler (swaddling her up and telling her how cute of a baby she is, rocking her like we do the baby, etc) basically we’ve not forced her to be a “big girl” at all. She’s 21 months old and very much still a baby herself.

- setting aside time for one on one toddler and mom time. This is usually naptime/bedtime or I’ll hand the baby off to my husband and read as many books as my oldest wants or have her stand at the bathroom sink while I get ready in the morning (a sink full of soapy water and a cup is a toddlers play heaven).

- the biggest “tip” though is to have a supportive partner if you’re able. My husband splits night wakes with me, is always willing to keep both the girls so I can walk away to take care of myself, he’s kept me stocked on water, snacks, and books, and has encouraged me to make plans with my friends so I don’t accidentally become a shut in. He is my sanity and my peace and I wouldn’t make it through without him.

I know people talk a lot of crap about 2 under 2 but I really think it’s a wonderful age gap and the first few weeks are only as stressful as you let them be. But what do I know, I’ve only been at this for three weeks 😉

Star, March 1

You can buy a copy of this issue for your very own at my eBay store: https://www.ebay.com/str/bradentonbooks

Cover: Humiliated Jennifer Lopez used for money and fame by Alex Rodriguez

Page 1: Princess Eugenie and her husband Jack Brooksbank, who is a UK ambassador for George Clooney and Rande Gerber's tequila brand, welcomed a son on February 9 at London's Portland Hospital

Page 2: Contents, Robin Thicke in front of a piano at Gold Diggers studio in L.A.

Page 3: Star Shots -- Serena Williams honored late Olympic gold medalist Florence Griffith Joyner by rocking a one-legged Nike catsuit at the first day of the Australian open, Chrissy Metz brought some vibrancy to the virtual SCAD aTVFest where she discussed This Is Us and was honored with the Vanguard Award, Olivia Culpo checked out the view before heading to the Shaq Bowl in Tampa

Page 4: Inside Britney Spears' nightmare -- a shocking new documentary exposes how Britney was used and abused by people she trusted -- Britney's unable to communicate with fans directly without permission -- fans flooded Justin Timberlake's Instagram to demand an apology for what one called profiting from trashing a woman

Page 5: Facing a lawsuit from her estranged older sister has rattled Mariah Carey -- Alison Carey alleged to a NYC court that Mariah had intentionally inflicted emotional distress by writing about her in the 2020 tell-all The Meaning of Mariah Carey and Alison is seeking $1.25 million after the singer accused her of, among other things, throwing boiling hot tea on her and trying to sell a 12-year-old Mariah to a pimp -- now Mariah has become wary of even those in her inner circle and is making longtime employees re-interview for their jobs -- Mariah's always been on the paranoid side but everyone is a suspect now and she's grilling everyone from bodyguards to chefs to stylists and household staff who have been with her for years and if anyone pushes back they are shown the door -- her great fear is that people could cross over and spill secrets to the enemy because she's been caught off guard before by those she trusted

* Catching ZZZs has become a real problem for Kelly Clarkson -- between her gig as a daytime host, trying to sell homes in Nashville and Encino, and battling her ex Brandon Blackstock over custody of their two kids, she is beyond stressed and she can't sleep and nothing works; the most shut-eye she gets is two to three hours -- it's gotten so bad she's even tried hypnotherapy but her workaholic brain outwits it -- meanwhile her legal woes including a lawsuit with her husband and ex father-in-law's talent agency are getting nastier and Brandon has told her in no uncertain terms that he's not going to stop until he gets what he wants which is a ton of money and time with the kids

* She was the most loathed mother in America and now Casey Anthony wants her say -- 10 years after she was acquitted of murdering her two-year-old daughter Caylee, Casey is making a documentary about the trial and she thinks she can clear her name -- she's not looking for sympathy but she believes she's a victim too and was unfairly convicted in the public eye -- she is planning on dropping bombshells in the doc including her take on the theory that the toddler accidentally drowned in the family pool as well as shocking secrets about her own abusive upbringing but don't expect much remorse

Page 6: Just over a year after her father Kobe Bryant and sister Gianna Bryant perished in a tragic helicopter crash, Natalia Bryant who is Kobe's oldest daughter, has signed a modeling contract with IMG Models who also represent Bella Hadid and Gigi Hadid and the just signed Inauguration standout poet Amanda Gorman

* Rumer Willis was heartbroken when her months-long relationship with Armie Hammer fizzled out in December but after harrowing reports of Armie's alleged abuse of women including asking to barbecue their ribs and carry their severed toes in his pocket, Rumer is telling friends she feels lucky -- she wanted to defend him when the cannibalism stories first came out because she thought they were outrageous and now she feels badly for all of the victims and she's really grateful she didn't get caught up in the Armie nightmare

* Star Spots the Stars -- Eva Longoria, Mandy Moore, Demi Lovato, Dan Levy, Dorinda Medley

Page 8: Star Shots -- Meg Ryan wore some wide-legged trousers and a cute cap on a nature walk in Santa Barbara, Gavin Rossdale wore pink socks while playing tennis in L.A., Ciara holding six-month-old son Win during a family getaway to Hawaii

Page 9: Delilah Belle Hamlin and Love Island's Eyal Booker removed their masks for a quick street smooch during a coffee date in L.A., Sofia Richie enjoyed some PDA with shipping heir Gil Ofer in Miami

Page 12: Kate Upton doing yoga, Tia Mowry-Hardrict and her husband Cory Hardrict shared dishwashing duty after cooking at home, Robin Roberts tasted a treat on Good Morning America in New York City

Page 13: Pregnant Brittany Cartwright brought her dog along to retrieve the mail in L.A., Victoria Justice showed off her toned tummy post-workout in L.A.

Page 14: Goldie Hawn turned quality time with granddaughter Rani into a workout toting her in a backpack, Madonna and Guy Ritchie's son Rocco Ritchie waded in during a vacation in Tulum in Mexico, Lucy Hale on a stroll with her dog Elvis in L.A.

Page 16: Chris Noth put in a day's work on The Equalizer in Paterson in New Jersey, Flavor Flav and Flo Rida at The Super Glow Super Bowl kick-off party in Tampa, Bradley Cooper kept daughter Lea close as the two ran errands in NYC

Page 17: More than a week after celebrating 18 months of sobriety Lily Allen enjoyed a snack on-the-go in London, Jessica Alba lifted her son Hayes while riding scooters with husband Cash Warren in Beverly Hills

Page 18: Normal or Not? Cody Simpson got physical with new girlfriend Marloes Stevens during a romantic getaway in St. Barts -- normal, Selling Sunset's Christine Quinn picking up a portrait of herself in L.A. -- normal, Jack Black raised Thor's hammer in a parody posted on Instagram prompting Chris Hemsworth to call it the greatest thing he's ever seen -- not normal

Page 19: The Crown's Emma Corrin looked intrigued by a leafy object she stumbled upon during a stroll in London -- not normal, Sarah Jessica Parker kicked back in heels during a break from assisting shoppers at her flagship store in NYC -- not normal

Page 20: Fashion -- stars look sweet in tiered dresses -- Maude Apatow, Logan Browning, Margot Robbie

Page 21: Julianne Moore, Camila Morrone, Saoirse Ronan

Page 24: After months of quietly dating, Aaron Rodgers and Shailene Woodley are ready to marry and they announced it in the most low-key way possible and the couple are madly in love and feel unequivocally that this is the real deal -- Aaron and Shailene were friends long before sparks flew in August last year and having to endure a long-distance romance during football season actually made their bond stronger -- Aaron and Shailene are already planning to start a family and they're at that stage when they feel ready to be parents and are keen to have a baby

Page 25: Olivia Wilde and Harry Styles have found another dynamic duo to spend their downtime with which is Florence Pugh and Zach Braff -- the foursome hit it off on the set of Don't Worry, Darling which Olivia is directing and in which Florence and Harry star -- they have the best time together and know how to forget the world outside -- as it turns out bearing witness to Florence and Zach's happy relationship despite their 20-year age difference played a part in Olivia taking a chance on dating Harry who is nine years her junior following her split from Jason Sudeikis and seeing them together inspired Olivia to go for it with Harry and she's so glad she did

* While some couples are overwhelmed being with their kids 24/7 in lockdown, Prince William and Duchess Kate have enjoyed the extended family time with Prince George, Princess Charlotte and Prince Louis -- having the kids at home during the pandemic has given Kate baby fever and she loves being around them and wants to have one more and she and William are trying for another, with Kate saying she's hoping for a girl -- as for raising four young kids, the pair are up to the challenge because Kate's a pro at multitasking and William is a devoted dad and they'll split parenting duties

* Matt Damon is hoping a change of scenery will save his rocky 17-year relationship with wife Luciana Barroso as the couple and their three girls have set up house in a lavish $7000-a-night rental in Australia's tony Byron Bay while the actor films Thor: Love and Thunder -- the beachy new surroundings are just what the couple needs after hitting a rough patch and Matt is working overtime to make sure Luciana enjoys herself Down Under by arranging date nights and buying gifts for her to open every day and even when he's working he's got time set aside for just them and the gestures seem to be working and it's the shot in the arm they both needed

Page 26: Cover Story -- Jennifer Lopez humiliated and used -- shocking cheating allegations rock J.Lo's world as fiance Alex Rodriguez's mistress Madison LeCroy tells all -- while Jennifer is putting on a brave face the affair rumors are devastating to her whether she admits it or not -- after revealing she and Alex exchanged DMs Madison said she doesn't want anything bad for his family or for hers -- Alex says it was innocent and that nothing happened but Jennifer is not fully buying it -- Jennifer and Alex's relationship is personal but it's also business; together, their fortunes have doubled

Page 30: Chip and Joanna Gaines -- inside our farmhouse reno -- Chip and Jo are expanding and renovating their Waco home and it may be their toughest job yet

Page 32: Celeb Parenting Fails -- these celebrity moms and dads share their hilarious hapless moments -- Anne Hathaway, Brad Pitt

Page 33: Willie Geist, Mila Kunis, Pink

Page 48: Parting Shot -- Despite it being her first concert in over a year, Miley Cyrus was ready to rock while headlining the TikTok Tailgate Super Bowl pre-show event in Tampa -- the show treated 7500 Florida-based healthcare workers to a set that included guest appearances by Joan Jett and Billy Idol, who both collaborated on Miley's latest album

Thanks for tagging me @dollsome-does-tumblr even though I haven't written fic in a gazillion years.

Rules: List the first lines of your last 20 stories (if you have less than 20, just list them all!). See if there are any patterns. Choose your favourite opening line. Then tag 10 authors!

The first thing that hit Rory Gilmore when she woke up was an overwhelming sense of vertigo.

The migraine was encroaching on the borders of her skull soon followed.

Where was she?

(The Morning After, Gilmore Girls, post series, Rory/Jess, or what happens when two not-quite-stepcousins hook up and everyone in Stars Hollow debates whether they should be encouraging this or not)

The first time they tried a real relationship again, it was a disaster.

He hadn't seen or talked to her for five years. Part of him regretted that a little, but she did say no, and he knew he had to start fresh if he was going to make any sort of clean break from the family legacy that had claimed him long before he was born.

(The Dynastic Plan, Gilmore Girls, AYITL era, Rory/Logan, or Logan explains to us why he could not get his shit together with Rory during AYITL)

Luke first noticed that something was amiss when he picked April up from the airport.

It was the middle of spring and she was wearing a turtleneck, a baseball cap, and sunglasses. When he asked her about it, she shrugged and claimed she thought that Connecticut was having a late winter spell, which didn’t sound right to him at all.

(The Cactus Incident, Gilmore Girls, post-series, in which Luke learns about the avian misadventures of one of his offspring)

“This has gotten completely out of control.”

Lorelai glanced up at her husband from where she was sequestered at her usual table by the window, surrounded by her laptop, piles of eclipse glasses in various colors, assorted boxes and tubes sprinkled in glitter and confetti, and a pile of streamers that had half fallen to the floor.

“This is a major celestial event, Luke”, Lorelai insisted. “A once in a lifetime opportunity to escape the daily drudgery of life to celebrate standing in the middle of the street for two hours and looking at the sky while we are treated to the spectacle of the universe pretending to usher in the doomsday a way too significant portion of the population are eagerly anticipating at any given moment –“

Luke put up his hand. “I get it.”

(A Convergence of Fancies, Gilmore Girls, Rory/Jess overtones I guess, post-AYITL, or Stars Hollow celebrates the 2017 solar eclipse, Rory is a sleep deprived new mom, and Lorelai is concerned because her family is watching too much Game of Thrones, aka the most chaotic thing I have ever written and I'm sorry)

Richard Lucas Gilmore’s second Independence Day celebration was turning out to be a lot better than his first.

For one thing, he was actually awake for it.

Rory’s pregnancy had stretched a week and a half past its original due date, leading to the delivery of her squalling bundle of joy on a humid June morning after fifteen hours of labor.

(Independence, Gilmore Girls, post-AYITL, in which Luke and Lorelai celebrate Independence Day with their combined offspring and toddler grandson and Lorelai confronts her impending empty nest syndrome)

Lorelai had thought that sending Rory off into the adult world would make her feel like her heart was being ripped out of her chest.

She had been dreading it for days, weeks, maybe even years. Despite what everyone had told her when she was a newly knocked-up teenager, she still felt that those first eighteen years raising Rory as she grew up herself had been the easy part.

(Full Circle, Gilmore Girls, post-series, in which Lorelai and Rory go through the same major milestones at the same time)

The fall of 2017 was turning out to be quite a revelation for Lorelai Gilmore-Danes.

She had never loved fall quite as much as she loved winter. Sure, there was the crispness wrought by the change of seasons and the concurrent excuse to shop for brightly colored sweaters and boots.

(The Grandparents, Gilmore Girls, Luke/Lorelai, post-AYITL, or Rory's love triangle and parenting woes as seen through Luke and Lorelai's eyes)

Few enterprises seemed to be designed with a specific target in mind quite as much as Facebook was for Lorelai Gilmore.

It caught her a little by surprise. Sure, she knew the basics of using a computer to run her business and control her finances. She could be disciplined and organized when she absolutely needed to be, and there was little use in clinging to outdated technology.

(Boundaries, Gilmore Girls, Luke/Lorelai, post-AYITL, or Luke and Lorelai try to rebuild their relationship and are very angsty about it)

Luke and Lorelai's third Valentines Day as a married couple started in the usual way.

It was usually their tradition to spend the holiday at home, but this year they had departed for Luke's cabin on the lake to spend a few days by themselves before the rest of the family joined them on Sunday. It was a beloved, time-honored tradition between the two of them to devote this day to each other to celebrate with their own brand of fanfare. Their adult children knew to stay very far away from them during this time.

(A Season of Peace, Luke/Lorelai and Rory/Logan, post-AYITL, in which Luke and Lorelai spend a weekend in the snow with their brood and we get an update on the younger generations's relationship statuses)

"Mom?"

"Yeah?"

"I'm pregnant."

She turned to face me. Gap-mouthed. Shocked. Disappointed. Humiliated.

This was not how I planned to share this news.

(A Simple Twist of Fate, Gilmore Girls, AU but fairly canon adjacent, in which Jess is Rory's baby daddy and Rory discovers that he has not exactly been solely pining for her in the years they were apart)

Jess didn't exactly intend to introduce his daughter to professional sports in this manner.

For the most part, he and Rory weren't quite the stereotypical thirtysomething hipster couple that they sometimes appeared to be. Sure, Rory was still occasionally breast-feeding after seven and a half months, and you could find quinoa and kimchi in their fridge stocked next to the baby food and hoagies.

(Home, post-AYITL, Rory/Jess, a "fast forward" of ASTOF in which Rory and Jess raise their daughter in Philadelphia and try to avoid admitting that they are no longer hip)

Lorelai Gilmore's journey to becoming an active participant in Stars Hollow town life was a bumpy one.

She stepped off of the bus in Stars Hollow a few months after her eighteenth birthday, freshly divorced and clutching her almost two-year-old daughter by the hand, determined to talk herself into whatever opportunity presented itself to her. She wasn't able to work on her charms on Taylor Doose at the grocery store, or Fran Weston at the bakery, but William Danes at the hardware store gave her directions to the inn at the outskirts of town and an offer to work the counter at his store if things didn't work out.

(Beginnings, Gilmore Girls, pre-series/AU, Luke/Lorelai, in which Lorelai and Luke's parenting situations are reversed: she and Christopher are divorced and he is involved in Rory's life but Luke is raising April by himself after Anna flaked out, and they start to bond)

Lorelai Gilmore Danes didn't expect to have empty nest syndrome hit her quite like this.

She'd spent much of her adult life – even long before she was technically an adult – tethered to Rory's side and not regretting a second of it. Then Rory was grown up and off exploring the world, and she was settled down with Luke in their unconventional but happily domestic manner.

(Glimpses Through the Looking Glass, Gilmore Girls, drabble series that goes all over the place based on #NationalFillInTheBlankDay)

Ted and Robin's seemingly long-awaited reconciliation lasted just short of six months.

Five months, three weeks, and two days, to be exact. Not that anyone was counting, least of all Robin.

(Making It Easy, How I Met Your Mother, Barney/Robin, post-series, in which Robin figures out that dating a widowed Ted is actually a very bad idea)

In the end, it was decided that the best way to resolve the battle for the Iron Throne was to dissolve it completely.

It had been a savage war, far more savage than any of its players had fought up to this point. Euron and Cersei were dead.

(The Calm, Game of Thrones, post-series but written halfway through season 8 so it doesn't include any of the stuff that people hate, in which I come up with a solution to the Jonerys dilemma that no one liked but it was still better than canon)

Summer finally bloomed beyond the wall five years after Jon Snow had crossed it for the last time.

Sometimes it seemed to him that everything before those five years was nothing more than a half-remembered dream. He had braced for his departure for the wall half-hopeful: at least this grand march towards kingship, the burden of unwanted responsibilities, the dread in his chest as he wondered if he would survive to the end of the latest war was over.

(After, Game of Thrones, post-series, Jon/Tormund, or in which Jon Snow is living happily ever after beyond the wall with his ginger, his dog, and a family of his own because I am in charge and I say so)

“You’re still shit at that, you know,” Tormund whispered in Jon’s ear.

Magritte snickered from the other corner of the main room of their cabin where she was roughhousing with Ghost. Alsi sighed beside her, picking up her bow from where it was lying beside her and inspecting it for flaws.

(The Line, Game of Thrones, post-series, Jon/Tormund, in which Jon is still living happily ever after but takes his family to visit Queen Sansa)

The images solidified in Jaime’s mind as he made his way through the streets.

Charred skeletons. Screaming children. Rampaging soldiers. Blood. Smoke. Mangled limbs. Chaos. He couldn’t keep any of it straight.

(The Lion and the Snow - Snapshots, Game of Thrones, AU, Jaime/Brienne, in which Jon is King, Jaime is the Hand Without A Hand, Brienne is the Lady Commander of the Kingsguard, they are all disasters, and I am not telling this story in order)

Tormund didn’t intend to get seriously involved with anyone when he moved to King’s Landing.

It had been a rough couple of years. Hell, the entire last decade had been its own special blend of unexpected pleasure and slow, turgid, relentless episodes of confusion and pain. That was adulthood, he supposed. Always one damn thing after another.

(The Dragon Heist, Game of Thrones, modern AU, in which single dad Tormund - Brienne is his baby mama - falls in love with art student Jon Snow and there are lots of coparenting shenanigans)

Patterns: Gee, I like to start these stories off with long, complicated explanations of everyone's relationship status.

Favorites: I guess that would be starting off The Morning After with Rory half-horrified at what she has gotten into. I also like dropping right in on Jonmund domesticity in The Line.

Tagging: @fineosaur, @seethemflying, @aliveanddrunkonsunlight, @janiedean, @angel-deux-writes, @littlerockerao3, @istaricelebelasse, @tormundjonthings, @sdwolfpup, and anyone else who feels like it (apologies if y'all have already been tagged)

Stop Calling Him ‘Horace’! - Eugene Fitzherbert Appreciation Week | Day 7: Birth Day

Sooooo.... Basically, I planned to have this pretty little fanfic finished up for today, the final day of Eugene Appreciation Week. This fanfic is extra-special, specifically it features our Eugene at ages we’ve never seen him in canon. Allow me to sum up this “plan” of mine in one word: HAAAAA!!!! Suffice it to say that although fanfic is very old-hat to me (I’ve been writing it since 1991, fgs) the world of fic-blogging is still relatively NEW to me and several of my fics and headcanons that I’ve released the past several weeks are needing to connect and soon, otherwise the whole convoluted, many-headed Medusa won’t wind up making any sense at all. I’m not exactly certain how it’ll all come together yet but I have to say that getting to spend the past week with all of you fellow Fitzy enthusiasts on Twitter and Tumblr has been some of the BEST DAYS EVER that I’ve experienced on the internet in my entire online life!!!! (And I’ve had an internet presence since 1991!!!) You’ve injected me with serious shots of Inspiration Elixir and I’ve had soooo very many ideas pass through my mind just over the past 7 days that I can’t possibly hope to catalog all of them. I haven’t felt quite this inspired in, well, YEARS.  I’ve enjoyed the heck out of sharing and exchanging headcanons, theories, ideas, essays, and even artforms. I’ve had a Tumblr account for more than ELEVEN YEARS and yet this is the first and only time I have consistently blogged and reblogged over the “heart-stopping” a time-span of 7 months **gasp** now (and counting). I’m a member of a couple dozen fandoms at least and this is the ONLY ONE that has consistently captured my interest AND managed to not scare the shit out of me so badly that I have to go and hibernate my account for the next, y’know, 3498349540 months. Until yet another worthy obsession captures my interest..... but Tangled the Series is still burning the brightest and I REALLY need it to right now, tbh. So THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU to everybody with whom I’ve interacted on this....I have health issues that cause me to transpose and forget names. But if you wish me to personally tag you, please tag THIS particular post and I shall tag you when I have actually finished this particular scene sequence featured in THIS ficlet. So now!!!!! Without further ado, I shall give you a teaser of the drabble-turned-ficlet-turned-short-story that will eventually feature the actual Birth Day of one Eugene Fitzherbert!!! Click the keep reading link below to see the remaining text. =)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Edmund knew from the beginning that Alexys did not like the name “Horace”. At the time, the king had told her that it was family tradition that the first-born son should receive a strong family name. Despite her pointed protests, he was utterly immovable on the subject.

The more Alexys’s belly grew, the more her dislike for that name swelled too. Shouldn’t she have a say in their child’s name, given that she was putting in all the work of keeping him healthy and strong, so to speak? Shouldn’t her family names count as possibilities too? Unfortunately, Edmund’s childhood largely consisted of his father and grandfather basically hazing him into believing that he had to “take command” of virtually any subject matter, in practically any situation. As a result, he thought of just about everything in militaristic terms. Over the past 4 years, Lexy had slowly and subtly molded her hot-headed young 20-something husband toward different healthier, less uptight ways of handling life and looking at various situations.

They had finally settled on a great couple synergy and got along very well -- except for the times they had an ongoing argument, that is. And this was definitely one of those times.

“I don’t understand why you won’t see reason, Edmund!”

“Because it’s more than just a name, Alexys! It’s a birthright. It connects him directly back to us and these names might very well be the most important gift we could ever give to our children!”

“You don’t think I know that?? Just as sure as I know this child is a boy, I am equally certain that he will not live a traditional royal life. And his name must reflect that!!”

Apparently, entertaining the possibility that any son of Edmund’s wouldn’t want to grow up a devoted soldier completely servile to the Moonstone wasn’t a possibility he was ready to face. Alexys watched as Edmund drew in a long breath, held it, his face turning interesting colors. Slowly his hands balled into fists and rather than saying anything, he exhaled one very pent-up breath and stomped out of the room. She had never before seen him so agitated. Although she also sensed the naming subject wasn’t at the core of his ire that day, she never brought it up again. Alexys hoped that whatever it was eating at him, Edmund would be able to solve it by the time their child came. And that would happen any day now.

Alexys wanted so much to tell Edmund about the beautiful vivid dreams she’d been having about their future child the past few nights. But he’d been increasingly preoccupied, sullen, and distant over the past month. It was most unfortunate and Alexys was as yet at a loss of how to help him. Now....while it’s true every good mother believes their child to be exceptional, Alexys knew that their son was destined to shatter tradition. For the first time in millennia, she knew without doubt that he would be the one to bring light to the Dark Kingdom. 

One of her dreams began with a small boy, age 4 or 5, who had floppy brown hair and very expressive round eyes just like Edmund. In the dream, Alexys and the boy were standing on a trail near the edge of a narrow rock crevasse....a location that somehow seemed familiar to Lexy....but she couldn’t quite place it. The little boy smiled up at her cherubically and reached out a chubby little hand toward hers.

“Play?” he questioned sweetly. He was happily bouncing on his feet, very subtly heel to toe, and even when he was in one place he barely stood still.

“Yes, of course!” Alexys replied, grinning in awe at this absolutely beautiful dream-child her mind was currently conjuring. She gathered up her long skirts and petticoats in her left hand and took the little boy’s offered hand in her right. As they walked, she noticed a small mole at the base of the boy’s neck and it matched exactly the one that Edmund had, only in miniature. So her suspicions had been confirmed; this was indeed their son.  They approached what Alexys recognized to be a very-scaled-down version of The Great Tree....and the crevasse was apparently a much-scaled-down version of the gorge which held the actual Great Tree. Even though it wasn’t the real Tree, it still possessed a very substantial and robust trunk. It was about 30 feet high and could easily withstand the weight of a couple dozen grown adults, if they ever had the inclination to climb this dream tree from within my own mind, Alexys thought wryly. As they reached the ground level of this miniature Great Tree, the little boy let go of her hand and latched onto the tree base itself. He turned back to her and said, “Play?” again while pointing upward. Bounce, bounce. Instantly, Lexy’s mothering instincts came out. “Uh, little one, I don’t think it’s safe to climb--” but it was clear the little boy wasn’t really listening to her. And even faster than a real toddler could climb, he scrambled up and out of her reach in a flash, giggling with childish abandon. She kept pleading with this child to stop and to come back down instead, that he might get injured, but he clearly had no intention of heeding her. Not only that, she didn’t even know his name. One thing was certain -- he definitely did not answer to ‘Horace’. Poor Alexys hoped this nightmare of a fearless toddler wasn’t an omen of things yet to come.  She fleetingly considered just tearing off her petticoats and skirts to climb and then realized it wouldn’t matter anyway; she was nearly nine months pregnant and thus not climbing anything that day. “Look!” She suddenly heard the little boy’s voice again. This time, he was speaking from some 30 feet overhead through the tree boughs. Alexys moved away from the Great Tree’s base to a better vantage point further out from the trunk. Shielding her eyes from the sun, the queen looked up at the tree to see that the little boy was now pointing out toward the opposite direction of the crevasse from where they originally came. In the distance, she could see what looked to be a miniature version of the impassable mountain range between the Dark Kingdom and the Great Tree. Just beyond was Black Crystal Valley and in the center of the valley, an exact copy of The Dark Palace, only much smaller. What happened next was nothing short of absolute surreality on toast. “Look!” said the little boy’s voice again, still giggling as he climbed even higher until it looked like he was physically standing on the canopy leaves of the fake Great Tree. Lexy’s breath caught in her throat as this little boy reached up and plucked a literal piece out of the sun -- yes, he plucked a PIECE out of the actual SUN -- straight out of the actual sky. The light emanating from the Sun and the Shard he had in hand didn’t seem to be affecting the little boy the way it was affecting Alexys. She was shielding her face from its overpowering brightness when suddenly, the little boy wasn’t in the tree canopy anymore. In the blink of an eye, he was standing miraculously in front of her. Alexys blinked incredulously and tried not to yell aloud in shock due to being so startled. She failed at not yelling, but at least the little boy didn’t appear to notice. Next, this little boy held out the Sun Shard toward Lexy. He must’ve done something to help it because now she could look toward its brilliance without being blinded.  “You can finally see my friend!” her boy said happily. Bounce, bounce. “We hug her!” he continued, holding the glowing object against his heart, rocking back and forth a few times. “And we kiss her,” and he gave the Shard his sweet toddler kisses. “And we be very soft,” he toddler-whispered, demonstrating deft touch through voice as well as action.“Now you!” he insisted, his pudgy hand offering the Sun Shard to her. Bouncy, bouncy, bounce. “I -- I don’t know. Won’t it burn me?” This dream had already gone so warped, she didn’t feel too weird for asking. Lexy was somewhat concerned with accepting the offerings of a toddler but he didn’t appear to be covered in slobber or any other mystery substances, thank goodness. Neither did the Shard. “Burn you?” the child echoed. He suddenly burst into giggles and said, “Silly Mama.” Lexy’s breath caught in her throat. Mama. He actually said it! How her mother’s heart fluttered. This….this interaction required something extra special. She oh-so-carefully got down on her knees (no small feat in her condition) so she could be level with her son. “Yes, your mama can be very silly sometimes,” Lexy acknowledged. Then she pointed toward the Shard in his hands and said, “Will you show me how?” Instantly, he came to her and passed the precious glowing object to Alexys. “Hold her here,” instructed her little boy, pointing toward his heart. Lexy was surprised to discover that the Shard wasn’t a shard at all -- and while it was very warm to the touch, it wasn’t burning hot. Pliable with only mild bit of give to it….rather like warmed sealing wax without the tackiness. Upon tucking the glowing object next to her bosom, Lexy looked upward at her boy and said, “and now I…” “Cradle,” followed by his rapid rocking back and forth motions. Bouncy-bounce bounce.  “Of course,” smiled Alexys, who had arranged both her arms to cradle this golden drop of sunlight. “Is that what you are now? Not a Shard -- but a Drop of Sunlight?” She was now talking to this object but again didn’t feel one bit silly for doing so. It seemed….alive, somehow. Slowly, carefully, she rocked back and forth while on her knees. “Sing, mama!” prompted her little boy, who was excitedly bouncing on his toes and clapping his chubby hands. A time-honored German lullaby sprang to mind and as she sang the words, the longer she sang, something rather remarkable happened. As Alexys looked down in her arms, she could’ve sworn she saw a ghost of an image, not more than a sparkling golden shadow really, of a completely different child in her arms. Only this child was much tinier and younger than the boy. This was an infant, a baby girl, one with remarkably long flowing golden hair. She appeared to have even more hair than her toddler son. By orders of magnitude more. Disembodied babygirl giggling and babbles filled the air around them. “You see her now!!!” Her little boy was more excited than ever! He clearly knows! Lexy could hear the rhythm of his feet in front of her. Bounce-bounce-bouncy bounce-bouncy-bounce. Alexys was afraid to look away, lest the wispy golden dust in her arms blow away before she could get her fill. “Who is she?” questioned Alexys in awe. “She is our friend. She is….Sun...shine. Yes. Sunshine,” the boy confirmed, tilting his head to one side as he spoke, as if he were listening for something only he could hear. ......to be continued!!!!......

Sequins, songs, kids... dance! This is what saved SOPHIE ELLIS-BEXTOR’s sanity during lockdown

‘I think I’m doing this for me.’ But for now, we need to head back to her house, where Sonny has appeared, and Mickey is delighted to see his mum. Plates are waiting to be spun, and as I let myself out, Jesse is putting on a show in the kitchen, with Sophie as the audience, sitting under the disco ball. ....and her wonderfully joyous discos filmed in the family kitchen helped lift the nation’s spirits too. She tells Hattie Crisell why Friday nights round at hers became so precious

ORIGINAL ARTICLE: https://www.dailymail.co.uk/home/you/article-8549299/Sequins-songs-kids-dance-saved-SOPHIE-ELLIS-BEXTORs-sanity-lockdown.html

Sophie Ellis-Bextor opens the door to me with a toddler in her arms – smiley 18-month-old Mickey – and her four-year-old son Jesse behind her, his hair a deep shade of copper. ‘You have the most beautiful hair I’ve ever seen,’ I tell him, genuinely quite dazzled, and he replies bashfully, ‘Well, I’ve just had it cut.’

Welcome to Sophie’s world: a large and glittering house in West London, packed to the rafters with kitsch, toys, cats and boys. I don’t know how many cats are around, but the boys number five: Mickey, Jesse, eight-year-old Ray, 11-year-old Kit and 16-year-old Sonny. Managing the lot are the singer, her husband Richard Jones (bass guitar player with The Feeling and the supergroup Loup GarouX), and a nanny, who joins them Monday to Friday during the working day. ‘I used to have a nanny who was with us all the time, and to be honest I felt like it was too much,’ says Sophie. ‘It’s fine if it’s my thing that I think about 24 hours a day, but I think it’s healthy for other people to have their own life away from it all. It’s five kids – it’s a lot.’

It certainly is, and it’s hard to imagine how demanding it must have been during lockdown, when the only one missing was the nanny. The public got a glimpse of this when Sophie performed a weekly series of ‘kitchen discos’, broadcasting them live via Instagram, her husband filming on his phone. They launched these shows during the bleakest part of the pandemic, and the good will that emanated from them was enormously cheering. She would appear in a sequined jumpsuit or rainbow-striped dress, a pair of platforms at the end of her mile-long legs, and would serenade the camera while children wandered casually in and out of view. Sometimes her teenage son would jump in to rescue the baby from a trailing wire, or one of the boys would need a cuddle, and their mother would pull them in close, keeping her other hand on the mic.

It was charming chaos. The music encompassed hits from Sophie’s back catalogue such as ‘Murder on the Dancefloor’ and ‘Take Me Home’ – or ‘Stay at Home’, as she rechristened it – but also crowd-pleasing covers and theatrical numbers from shows such as Grease. For the audience, it offered uplifting relief from the frightening reality of the time: climbing death rates and isolation. It was comfort music, I say. ‘Exactly,’ she agrees. ‘And disco’s always had that for me anyway. It’s so euphoric and joyful, and it’s complex. In disco you can have the most painful, heartbreaking scenarios, but they’re in among something that makes you want to put your hands in the air and sing along. I think music can allow you the space to feel joy and anxiety at once.’

I am delighted to find that one end of their large kitchen still looks very much as it did, with the disco ball and a half-deflated helium balloon in place over the sofa. She confirms that it’s more or less always like this, perhaps minus the tinsel curtain. Colour and fun are everywhere in the house, from the framed retro artworks filling every wall, to the pinball machine in pride of place. At the other end of the kitchen, a diner-style menu-board for the kids bears the words, ‘Be polite or no service.’

Leaving the children with the nanny, Sophie and I head out to chat on a bench in the park. She’s wearing an embroidered navy dress and a red fluffy cardigan, with red lipstick that has mostly worn off; at 41, she’s truly beautiful, with very pale green eyes. Despite what we’ve seen from her on Instagram, it hasn’t been an easy time. For one thing, there was the fall from her bike in June that left her in hospital with a gory head wound. When I mention it, though, she brushes it off with, ‘I cannot dine out on that any more.’ Then she adds, ‘I mean, I don’t recommend cycling off a towpath – it did hurt.’

‘I knew that this was something that was happening in millions of households. I do worry about all my parents – I say “all” because I’ve got step-parents as well – but I think really it was focused on John, because he’s so vulnerable. It’s such a weird, torturous thing isn’t it for human beings, if you say that hanging out with someone you love is the one thing that might actually endanger them? How can you wrap your head around that?’

She hasn’t been thrilled with the government messaging around the virus. ‘“Stay at home” is clear and concise and all ages get it. “Stay alert”? I hardly ever feel alert. I don’t feel alert now.

And we’ve all shown we’re good at following guidelines that make sense, but you can’t keep bending it for people. Look at the effect when the rules were made flexible.’ She seems to be referring obliquely to the Dominic Cummings/Barnard Castle debacle. ‘We all thought, “Oh well, if we could have been going off and having day trips all this time, why was I staying at home and not seeing my mum, who lives ten minutes away?” I found that really tough.’

The kitchen discos were as much for her and the family as they were for the audience. ‘It was Richard’s idea. One day we were making plans and doing stuff, and the next day it was like, boomph, everything shut down. Suddenly we were just home all the time, all work cancelled, all the festivals… I was supposed to be going to Australia, New Zealand, I had gigs all round Europe. And Richard was, like, “Well, why don’t we do a gig here, and it gives us something to do and a bit of fun?” I think we missed everybody.’

Performing during that time, even via Instagram, gave her a huge sense of connection, she says. ‘I honestly don’t know what I would have done if I hadn’t had that, and I don’t know how it would have been for our family, because it became really precious.’ She’s now planning a Kitchen Disco Tour next May (there will also be an album, out this October), and hopes it will offer audiences a cathartic experience. ‘I want to provide a place where people can get lost in the moment. I want them to walk out of there and go, “Oh my goodness, I didn’t know how much I needed that.”’

It was no surprise to her boys to see her dressed up and performing; Mickey sleeps in the room where she keeps her fantastic stage wardrobe, and they’ve all been with her to festivals, gigs and recording studios. It was clear from their low-key presence in the kitchen discos (she left it up to them whether they wanted to be there or not) that they’re not fazed by it. ‘The older I’ve got, the more the me at home and the me on stage is the same person anyway,’ she says. Her first solo album came out almost 20 years ago; this one will be her eighth.

She’s also just celebrated her 15th wedding anniversary with Richard. Theirs was a whirlwind romance that stuck: ‘I found out I was having a baby after only about six weeks,’ she says with a smile. ‘We’d known each other for a while – he’d been in my band – but we’d literally just started dating and I hadn’t even really told anybody.’ Sonny was born two months prematurely, thus arriving only eight months after they’d got together.

And they’ve now got him almost to adulthood, I say. ‘Yeah, and he’s lovely; he’s his own person. You know, parenthood is so much more reactive than I ever thought,’ she says. ‘I thought it was all about what you put in. It’s not. I realised it the day I had him: I looked at this tiny baby and I thought, “Oh my goodness, you’re Sonny, and now I’ve got to help you show me who you are and what you need from me.”’

To raise five children while continually working is no mean feat, and she mentions that there were tense moments during lockdown. But she and Richard clearly make a good team. ‘I guess the thing that’s often not celebrated as much in long-term relationships – and I think this goes for family members, friends, all sorts of relationships where there’s love – is that we actually really like each other,’ she says. ‘I really like who Richard is, and I respect him and I like spending time with him.’

She took an extended break after Sonny came along, following a difficult birth. ‘But to be honest, the more babies I’ve had and the older I’ve got, the more confident I’ve become about what I can do around being pregnant and having kids,’ she says. ‘I’ve been better with the last couple at just keeping going with the work either side of it. I have a job where I can basically call the shots a bit. I’m very lucky with that and I totally exploit it. Also I like it if I do a big gig and I’m six months pregnant – I feel quite clever,’ she laughs.

The challenges of this complicated life have inspired Sophie’s new project – the podcast Spinning Plates, on which she chats to other working mums, including Caitlin Moran, Fearne Cotton, the mummy blogger Candice Brathwaite, and her own mother Janet. ‘I’ve got such a brilliant array of women, and honestly it feels like a privilege to sit there for an hour and ask them loads of nosy stuff,’ she says. ‘Obviously the springboard is the idea of the working mother, but actually what really unites us is we’re all women, and there are so many things about being a modern woman… It’s a rich pot of stuff to go through, really.’

She loved having the chance to interview her mum. ‘In my head she’s always been this real trailblazer and very confident. She never seemed to have any guilt with any of her work, and I’m glad, because it gave me a good role model of “It’s OK for me to be selfish enough to have my work and keep it separate if I want to, and do the things I want to do.” I don’t think I would have been confident enough if I hadn’t had a mum like that; I’ve struggled a bit to give myself permission sometimes even with that.’

Another chat, with Yvonne Telford, founder of the fashion brand Kemi Telford, made her realise that at times she’s too self-critical. ‘She said she hates it when she hears women say, “Oh, I’m such an idiot,” and I was, like, “God, I do that all the time.” Even with the podcast, when I first started writing to people I wanted as guests, I’d say, “Don’t worry, I know how it goes – you’re probably too busy to reply.” Then I was, like, what am I doing? I’m saying to them, “Ignore me!”’ She bursts out laughing. It sounds as though making the podcast might be rather empowering. ‘Yes,’ she agrees.

Inspired By The trans!Brian Ask (Maylor)

Thanks for the submission @deep-dark-purple!

*****

I reached my ask limit I was vaguely aware that was a thing but had never had it occur. I was inspired like I've never written this much in one sitting ever. Full stop. I just had to get it out. I couldn't stop thinking about that AU. If you want me to finish submitting via asks as well I can do it later tonight Though I can't remember how many parts I was able to send so I would send the last half. 

(Yeah you read that right it’s 20 parts but I don't think its narrative structure is how I would like it for posting so editing is required and there's no way I'm doing that.) This was inspired by the trans!Brian post. Surprisingly Brian has been presenting as male since he was about 4 which is very young even now a days. This was due to Brian's behavior, it was getting more and more troubling and it started not long after his 3rd birthday. At first, they wrote it off as a phase. 1/20

They hoped he would just get passed it soon but after 6 months it became clear that wasn't going to happen. He would have tantrums whenever Ruth tried to dress him in, he refused to play with most of his toys because "there too girly." They thought that if they took away the only ones he would play with he would then start playing with the other toys (those toys happened to be gender neutral and space themed in hindsight Brain realizes that’s why he studied astrophysics. 2/20

Those toys were his refuge the only things that didn’t make him feel “wrong”.)  To say that plan is failure is an understatement. He would break them or try to throw them away. Within the week they gave his toys back by then he didn't even have any other toys to play with. Plus, they couldn't stand seeing Brian so distraught for any longer. Brian stopped responding to his name and would only acknowledge that someone was talking to him was if they were using a gender-neutral pet name. 3/20

This was the most troubling to his dad since he had been calling him princess since before he was born. So hearing Brian yell that he isn't his princess was like a punch in the gut but he thought it wasn't like they can just "pretend" that he was a boy. Right? That was a revolution to Brian's mom though. She has had to deal this much more then Brian's dad so she was willing to try anything but Brian's dad is like "we absolutely will not do that" and she didn't consider going against him. 4/20

Soon after that conversation Brian's tantrums started to involve hurting himself and that was her breaking point. The thought that she could lose Brain when it was so hard to have him in the first place. She didn't care that it wasn't what her husband wanted because given the choice between the two of them she would pick her baby every time. They basically bent to everything he wanted so he could feel like a boy and the effect was immediate and it was such a relief.  5/20

They ask him what he wants to be called since he doesn't like what they've been calling him. He asks why they were calling the other name and they explained how naming works and since they thought he was a girl they picked it out for him. He responds to that by asking that since he is actually a boy what will be his name. Since “only mommies and daddies can pick names.” Plus, that is kind of a difficult question for someone so young. So, from then on, he was called Brian. 6/20

They didn't think that it would last but a few years later right before he was supposed to start school and Brian is "still" a boy. They ask him if he wants to be a girl when he goes to school and that conversation didn't go well to say the least. They decided that the best thing to do is to move somewhere that no one remembers that they had a daughter and now they have a son. They go all out, changing anything that says Brian is made to say that he's a boy. (easier in 1950s?) 7/20

The only issue that they could see arising is baby and toddler photos that are framed around the house. Ruth can't barre the thought of getting rid of them or hide them away. Plus, it would weird to only have pictures of him often the age 4 1/2. The explanation they came up with was that Ruth was pregnant with a girl and miscarried but soon after was pregnant with Brian. So they had all these girl clothes. Since money was a little tight and babies don't care about those things. 8/20

It also helped because no one is going to ask any follow up questions after hearing that it's having to do with a miscarriage. (I've also heard that sometimes parents of trans kids do feel grief after their kids transitions so it doesn't feel like as much of a lie since they feel like they lost a daughter but again I'm in no way an expert so take that with a grain of salt.) From there on out Brian has no issues in school and is a great student. The main issue is puberty. 9/20

 Thankfully his mom has become kind of unstoppable and even in the 60s they were able start Brian on hormones. A sympathetic doctor purposely misdiagnosed so even in the future he wouldn't have issues getting more without drawing attention to himself. Fast forward again to Roger's Smile audition which played out much the same as it did IRL but with one major exception. Brian is so jealous that Roger is so comfortable with himself. 10/20

 Roger has no issues with wearing women's clothes and having long hair and being so beautiful that he is mistaken for a woman more often than not. Wait, scratch that last one. I shouldn't think about him like that, he's a band mate and a guy. No matter how charming and funny he is and they sound great playing together. Queue gay crises (though I'm thinking him as demi in this AU and would make a lot of sense since this is his first crush he's even had, 11/20

So, considering that he doesn't have this realization until he's known Roger for more than a year and he's just noticed that his feelings started to change for Roger in the last month or so when Tim left the band. (I'm not going to bother with researching to see if that timeline works right. I've already spent way too much time on this as it is.)) Once he starts thinking about his feelings he can't stop. It's both the best and worst thing he's ever felt. 12/20

The pinning lasts nearly 6 months, during that time Brian gets upset whenever Roger brings someone home. Roger does notice it but thinks its jealousy because that was his aim. He thought that if he made Brian jealous so Brian would start having the same feelings he has. (mutual pinning!) After months of this he accepts that Brian won't ever think of him like that. So, Roger starts taking home guys instead of girls. He had always been discreet when it came to his male hookups. 13/20

Queue Freddie coming to the rescue. He is so over all this. When Roger starts bring home guys that look more and more like Brian, he feels like it's his duty to end this ridiculous situation. (this is where I'm blank I don't know how Freddie helps them get together but he does and never lets them forget it.) Brian does have Roger agree to taking it slow using all sorts of reasons with the exception of him being trans and a virgin (love me some experienced/inexperienced tropes) 14/20

Roger wants to be patient and he tries but he feels this is getting ridiculous and he doesn't want to push because he knows what that feels like and it sucks (I'm not bothering to figure out that this is already to long.) The biggest problem is he feels like Brian is keeping something from him but he thought it was just embarrassed about being inexperienced but then he brings it up during their nearly daily blue ball inducing make out session. 15/20

He tells Brian if that's what he's worried about he doesn't have to be. Basically, they finally have a conversation and Roger is really sweet and tells him about some of his not so great encounters so if anything, he's kind of grateful since that means he's never had to deal with that. (I'm thinking it was a bunch of different things and people that in retrospect he wasn't ready for.) Then he says whatever they do it would be a first for him since it would be with someone he loves. 16/20

That's the first time either of them had said that. It made Brian feel so guilty that he's been keeping something so big and it shows on his face so Roger backtracks because he realizes how that may sound like pressuring Brian considering what they were just talking about. Brian can't take Roger apologizing when this is all "his fault." Once Brian is able to get Roger to shut up Brian says that he loves him too which is why I need to tell you something. (super ominous) 17/20

I don't feel comfortable writing that confession since I'm not qualified to. Basically, Brian tries his best to explain everything (it's the first time he's ever done this) Brian says he understands if Roger wants to break up. Roger says he doesn't but he has a lot of questions. So, Brian says he'll answer anything he wants to ask since he's never felt more relieved. They talk for hours some questions are meant to make Brian laugh some are serious or insensitive. 18/20

They end up falling asleep on the couch cuddling. (They’ve been in the living room I never mentioned that. It's as per Brian's request, he thought it would be easier to keep themselves from going too far then if they were on a bed.) There is all lot of instances of dysphoria but Brian always does his best to explain what caused it so they can avoid it in the future. It still takes a while (like a few months) for them to work up to sex. After he asks Roger if it's always that good. 19/20

Roger says no it's not and that it's just him that made it good. (I know that's really cheesy but I don't care.) The whole thing is adorable. Other things in this AU: It's Roger that made Brian comfortable enough to grow out his hair which is why he keeps it the same for the rest of his life. Roger is bisexual here. Brian's dad is still disapproving he's worried about draw attention and what would happen if he was outed. This took me 4 hours but I needed to get it out somewhere. 20/20

#YouKnowMe

I have had 2 abortions, both surgical under general anesthesia. They were practically back-to-back right around my 21st birthday. I was married. I had a toddler. I was the sole financial provider in my home. Being pregnant made me so sick I could barely function. I had been on and off hormonal birth control for years and it made me absolutely insane and sick for one week a month. The flux in hormones turned me into, for lack of a better work, a PMDD Monster. I’d gotten a diaphragm from Planned Parenthood but hadn’t realized just how bad my allergy to the the required spermicide was. 

My husband didn’t take the time to ask for my consent most of the time, let alone whether or not I’d put in my diaphragm. At 20/21 years old the concept of bodily autonomy was foreign to me. Between being sexually assaulted (more than once) and the cultural scripts I’d been taught, I just thought it was normal. I was the bad guy when I said no to him. 

I was lucky in that I was able to get my tubes tied the following spring at 21 years old with only one child while separated from my husband. The worst thing about that: the doctor was working pro bono (Planned Parenthood also got me connected with that service) and after a brief exam said to me, “Well, you’re not too fat so we can do it.”  

(Logically I know that it was about the need for additional hands in surgery based on body type. Emotionally, I felt like I’d been called fat by a medical professional. That was the least direct comment I’ve had about my weight by a doctor since then but it was the first time I’d heard anything like it before and it stung.)

I shared that tweet yesterday on my Facebook and got a message shortly after from a dear friend who is over 10 years my junior. Her message said, “I had an abortion last week.” 

This is a young woman who has always been very vocal about all things political but she hadn’t posted anything direct about the abortion bans that are happening around the country. She said something to the effect of, “I could post #metoo all day but right now I can’t do what you did. I can’t tell anyone.”

She then described her experience of a “safe, legal” abortion. She was 5 weeks along and the doctor made the remark that he doesn’t often see women in the clinic so early. Let me say it again: The abortion doctor sees VERY FEW women before 6 weeks along. 

Let that sink in, in light of the current laws that are being passed.

She had an ultrasound with a wand because it was too soon to do the abdominal type most people think about. Her guy was allowed to come in for that but then was basically kicked out of the room before either of them could process anything. The nurses were very stiff and curt. Only the doctor and his assistant during the procedure showed her any compassion. They gave her a xanax but no other anestesia. She screamed in pain and was worried they would have to go back in because the doctor had to use a microscope to be sure he got it all. 

On top of the physical experience, she described a feeling all-too-familiar to those of us who have made this choice for ourselves. She felt relief that it was done, but then guilty for feeling relief. That guilt comes from the kinds of bullshit that people (typically white, cis men in power) talk about when they give reasons to outlaw abortions. It’s external bullshit that none of us need in the throes of this kind of thing. Period. 

My heart broke for her realizing how lucky I was during my procedures. How lucky I was that I was allowed those choices and that despite my own emotional struggles with my decisions (given the core of my reasons for doing it) I can’t imagine what my life would have looked like without those choices. 

This is what women deal with in the best circumstances. It’s heartbreaking. It’s horrifying. And then we get to hear people talk about these fictional women who use abortion as birth control and shame us for, as she and I both did, choosing the life of our living children over the potential for a zygote to become an embryo then a fetus, and then another child to support with our limited resources and opportunities. Fuck that. 

I’m furious for the women who won’t have the choices we had. I’m furious for the women who live with the bullshit guilt imposed on us by people who have never walked in our shoes judging the choice we were able to make. I’m heartbroken for those of us who endure the physical distress of being pregnant when we are not in a place in our life to be pregnant, let alone raise a/another baby. I’m devastated to think about the women and GIRLS who will find themselves in that place and have no safe, legal options available that will allow them to move forward in their lives in the way that I was able to. 

I’ve got so much of my other shit coming to the surface lately that this feels overwhelming, but I can’t stay silent. I can’t let people keep talking about “those women” when I AM one of those women. I am one of the 1 in 4. You might be, too. And whether or not you can tell your story, know that you are not alone. WE are not alone. Keep fighting. Keep talking. Keep going!

Guns for Hire

Ramsay Bolton x Reader

ao3

Summary:  You are the wife to the Heir of the Red Kings, Ramsay Bolton. living the undercover life of a mob wife has its perks, and you love your husband. But you find out something that seems to unfold a series of unwanted events…

Chapter 41: Eye of the Storm

"So lemme get this straight, your father in law wants to kill his son and use the child inside of you to be groomed to his liking?" Tyene said, setting her empty glass down and giving you a hard look.

"Yes. But what's more is that Walda is pregnant apparently. If she has a boy too my son will be no better off. Just another Ramsay in Roose's eyes. All three of us will be killed." You said, throat feeling tight as you struggled to get the words out.

"Then we have to strike first." Tyene said, as if it were that simple.

"No. We can't. You don't understand. Ramsay doesn't know! Nobody knows except you. And it will stay that way. Do you understand? Tell no one." You said with a threatening snarl.

"How and why are you keeping this from Ramsay?! Friday night showed me he would love to kill his father."

You sighed, pulling your phone toward you. "That's the problem though, Ty. Rams doesn't want to kill his father. He wants his father to love him. It's sad. Roose hates him, and all Ramsay wants is for his father to approve of him. Just once to praise him. A pat on the back. And I'm afraid that's what's going to happen. Roose is going to lure him into a sense of false security and kill him once he thinks his father fucking loves him. Ramsay is like a toddler. He acts out to get a reaction from Roose, no matter how negative. Any response is better than none, right?" You unlocked your phone, thinking you better tell your mother the 'good news'.

"What are you saying?" Tyene asked, leaning back into the couch.

"I'm saying that Ramsay is unstable and vulnerable because he's fucked up in the head! Watch. Roose is going to prey on all the mental instability he has instilled into his son. I cannot let that happen! We need to strike. But I can't afford it until he makes the first move. And the most unsettling part of that is it is unpredictable. It may be tonight. It may be next week. Hell, Roose may not do shit until his newest child is born. I don't know. But I need to be ready. I need more girls in Kings establishments. Fuck the Lannister's for now. I could care less about them. We are at war within our own ranks and nobody but us know. But the Boys are not to know anything."

"Your secret dies with me. And I plan on living many, many more years." Tyene said, holding her pinky out to you.

You gave a laugh and took her pinky in yours.

"So, where are the Boys now?" She asked, standing and grabbing up her empty glass.

You too rose from the couch and walked into the kitchen.

"Don't know really. On the way back here we passed that group of men from Friday night. Rams said they were Frey men. It's funny though... Kings, Lions, and the Towers. What an odd group to be dealing with one another..." You said slowly, looking back down at your phone.

[You: hey mom. Just wanted to let you know, you will be having a grandson come end of June.]

"I've only ever heard of the Frey's in passing. I don't know much about them?" Tyene said, sitting at the table as you set your phone on the counter and pulled the freezer open.

"The Boys talk shit about them. Apparently bottom of the barrel kind of folks. Inbred idiots who are only in the game because they come from old money." You glanced over at Tyene, "wanna stay for dinner?"

"Sure. If you don't mind. I'm stuck here until Matt gets back anyways." She shrugged.

You saw your phone screen light up. You picked it up:

[Mom: oh my goodness! Your father and I are both excited! I can't even begin to tell you how excited I am! We love you baby! Come see us soon.]

[You: alright momma. I'll see what I can do. I love you guys too!]

×××

"Hey good looking, whatcha got cookin'?" Ramsay purred, grabbing your hips and pulling you back into him.

You melted into him with a grin.

"Thought I'd finally make that rack of ribs." You replied, motioning at the salad you had been cutting up, "and salad. And baked potatoes."

"Right on, little momma. Everything good here?" He said, releasing you and reaching for a glass tumbler.

"Far as I know." You shrugged, gasping as something pushed you into the counter slightly.

You looked down quickly to a pair a deep brown eyes, a wet black nose, and lolling pink tongue.

You shot Ramsay a dirty, disbelieving look.

"Rams. I told you, I'm too tired to keep up with a puppy." You said, kneeling down to love all over the puppy regardless.

"You keep bitching about how boring it is here. So I solved your problem." Ramsay shrugged, pouring his whiskey into the ice filled tumbler.

You rolled your eyes, but grinned anyways, "name?"

"Don't know. Fuck Head if he pukes in the floorboard again."

"Puppy!" Tyene said excitedly, walking in the kitchen. "Look at these ears!"

"See. Someone likes puppies at least." Ramsay sneered, leaving the kitchen.

"I'm naming him!" You called after your husband.

"Then I get to name our son. Choose wisely." Ramsay called back.

You pursed your lips, turning to the sink to wash your hands.

"Think if I choose a stupid enough name for the dog Ramsay will choose a decent name for our child?"

Tyene snorted, "no. He would do anything to get under your skin."

You sighed, "you're right. But as long as my son isn't named Kylo or Anakin, or... Han Solo."

"Nah, it would be more like Bruce or Clark. Maybe Steve or... what's Iron Man's name?" Tyene laughed.

"Tony." you said, curling your lip in distaste .

"See, Anakin Bolton sounds better than Tony Bolton in my opinion."

"You are not helping." You laughed.

"I'm here to keep secrets and do dirty deeds. Not help defend you against your husband's terrible choices in names." Tyene giggled, scooping up the puppy and leaving you alone in the kitchen.

×××

Matt rested the side of his face on the table, "Can I just adopt you both so I can eat like this every day?"

"Sure. And you can move in and sleep in the spare bedroom right next to ours. You will love that. Right when you're little baby ass is so close to dreamland." Ramsay smirked.

Your cheeks warmed.

Matt snorted.

"Don't believe me, kid? I am a sex god."

Tyene caught your eye and you looked away quickly, embarrassment swallowing you as you stared at your hands in your lap.

"Boss, don't mean to interrupt your bragging, but we have a situation." Damon said, looking up from his phone. "Check your shit."

Ramsay pat himself down, casting around for his phone.

"Couch, dear." You said, frowning as the atmosphere in the room turned from cozy and happy to tense and on edge.

Ramsay left the kitchen in a hurry. You could hear him cursing in the other room.

He returned to the kitchen, lighting a cigarette and pulling his coat on.

"Let's go then, Boys. Looks like we're playing cop detail." Ramsay mumbled through his cigarette.

Matt, Damon, and Alyn rose from the table.

"Ben and Yellow Dick will meet us at the shop."

You frowned, watching the men scramble around to grab up coats and guns.

Ramsay placed a kiss to the top of your head, "I'll be back as quickly as I can. I love you."

"You boys be careful. I love you too." You said, watching them leave.

"Wonder what's going on?" Tyene asked.

"I'll ask Charlotte. Damon always had the scanner on." You said pulling your phone from your pocket.

[You: hey, what's going on? The Boys just left here in a hurry?]

"You go sit down and relax. I'll clean up the kitchen. You busted your ass to make dinner. Now it's my turn." Tyene said.

You simply nodded, realizing how tired you were. You walked into the living room, curling up under your blanket on the couch. A cold, wet nose nudging your hand tucked under the throw pillow.

You grinned, grabbing the remote and pulling the puppy up on the couch with you. He made himself as small as possible to lay with you. You dreaded how big he was going to be, judging by the size of his feet.

You flipped through TV channels. Your phone vibrated.

[Charlotte: no idea. I'm working tonight. I'll see what I can find out and let you know.]

[You: thank you! Oh, we are having a boy, btw.]

[Charlotte: awe! I'll be by tomorrow and you can tell me all about it. But give me about 20 to see if I can find out what's going on.]

You set your phone back down, scratching the puppy between the ears and closing your eyes.

After lying still for awhile you could feel the fluttering movements in your stomach.

My son. You thought with a small, sad smile, resting your hand on your belly.

"Uh... (y/n)?" Tyene's voice said from far away.

"Hm?" You hummed, opening your blearily eyes a bit

"TV."

You blinked a few times and glanced over at the TV. You must of fallen asleep as the ten o'clock news was on.

It took you a moment to realize what you were looking at. But when it hit you, you couldn't help but make a noise in your throat, sitting up straight, scaring the puppy who yelped loudly.

The police station. Burning to the ground.

"Hold on folks... we are getting reports that Robb Stark, Ned Stark's son, has just been shot... oh... And his... oh god. Excuse us while we cut to a quick break. Stay tuned for more breaking news..." The news reporter was saying, his face pale and upset, pushing the earphone further in his ear to listen better.

You glanced over at Tyene and frantically felt around for your phone.

"Take the pup out back please." You said, finally closing your fingers around your phone.

2 new texts.

[Charlotte: not 100 on what's going on, but the Boys are safe. They are there as a bumper for whatever is going on. Not directly involved.]

[Rams: do not worry.]

You frowned, looking back at the TV, wishing the stupid truck commercial would hurry up and be over so you could find out exactly what was going on.

You sat on the edge of the couch, eyes glued to the TV.

Robb Stark dead. His poor girlfriend, dead. Doctor Cat, also dead. All three murdered in cold blood. According to the sources, the poor older woman watched her son and his woman die before she was finally killed.

Would that happen to You? Would you watch your husband die before the cold metal was turned on you?

What about the other Starks? Did Sansa know? What about your little street racer? Then there were the two youngest. Both boys. You knew nothing about them.

Where the fuck was Ramsay? Did he set the blaze to the police station? Who killed the Starks?

What a very weird, unsettling day. Seemed to be setting the mood for what was to come.

single dad!minhyuk

minhyuk has a 4 year old boy named jinwoo and he would Die For His Baby Boy

jinwoo is really like a miniature version of his dad, he looks just like minhyuk and is super friendly and cheerful and sweet

when the two of them are together…… it’s almost too much like you look at them and ur blinded by their sunshine smiles …. model scouts have approached them a LOT about doing commercials

even though the two of them are very happy now, jinwoo’s mom was actually cheating on minhyuk for a long time and he found out about it only a few weeks before she gave birth ;(

which really really hit him hard because he was only 20 when she got pregnant……. and he had prepared to be the best father and husband he could be, but the whole time he was scrimping and saving for their family she was with another man

he tried really hard to work it out with her so jinwoo could have a mom, but in the end she was sorta like “i don’t want a kid anyways” and left minhyuk with jinwoo…… 

even though he was heartbroken, jinwoo is by far the best thing to ever happen to him

now the two of them are a high functioning father-son team, minhyuk has a day job as  a pencil pusher but he moonlights at a dance studio as a choreographer

jinwoo is always super stylish because minhyuk dresses him! now he looks like one of those fashion instagram toddlers, and when he was a baby he wore the CUTEST onesies…. it was…. so sweet…..

one time minhyuk put jinwoo in a puppy onesie!!!!! jooheon cried…… minhyuk cried…. changkyun shed a tear but pretended it was just allergies

the walls in their little apartment are COVERED in pics of jinwoo because minhyuk takes photos when jinwoo so much as sneezes. he also has scrapbooks documenting every day of jinwoo’s childhood

entries range from “jinwoo said dad for the first time!” to “today jinwoo said uncle hyungwon looks like a frog” to “he beat changkyun at mario kart for the first time today [crying face][happy face]”

he makes kihyun take **professional** photos of jinwoo with his hq camera and once he wanted to blow up a photo and make it into a huge poster. kihyun was like i love jinwoo too, but please Chill Out

basically minhyuk is his son’s biggest fan and would do anything to make him happy, especially because he worries that he isn’t enough by himself

so when jinwoo comes home from daycare one day talking about his friend’s new cute dog and how much he wants a puppy…. there’s no way minhyuk is not taking him going to get his kid a dog. also there’s no way minhyuk is passing up an excuse to adopt a dog

after a lot of puppy research, that weekend the two of em make their way downtown to the animal shelter to see the dogs, because jinwoo insisted on adopting a shelter dog “so they can have a happy family too!” (minhyuk teared up when he said this)

and there….. as soon as they enter the shelter…… minhyuk sees you at the front desk talking to the receptionist, and he really thinks he’s seen an angel when you turn to him and smile w/ a “hello! how can we help you today?”

for once in his life minhyuk doesn’t know what to say but jinwoo immediately pipes up with a “dad and i are here to get a puppy!!!!” and your smile only widens at the cute lil boy and his equally cute dad

you work at the shelter and help people with the animals so you immediately offer to show them some of the dogs (ignoring the knowing wink from the receptionist)

once he gets over his initial speechlessness minhyuk gets right back to his normal chatty self, answering all your questions about what type of dog they’re looking for and what size……. but all the while he can’t help but gush inwardly at your smile and the way you’re interacting with his son

you show him all the dogs that fit their interests and when you gently guide jinwoo to say hello to the pups minhyuk’s all [heart eyes] !!!! at the dogs but also at you

because he’s been so busy with being a dad and working ,,,,,,,,,,,, honestly it’s been a long time since minhyuk felt interest in anyone at all ,,,,, but when he drops that it’s just him and jinwoo and he sees the relieved interest in your eyes, he decides he really doesn’t want to pass this opportunity up

back to the DOGS!!!! jinwoo falls in love with this fluffy white one year old dog named tofu, and the shelter rules are that you take the dog home for a week long “trial run” before signing any of the paperwork, so you and minhyuk organize the logistics as jinwoo plays with tofu in the background

and as you hand him the paperwork for when he next comes minhyuk goes “will you be here~~~?” and you can’t help but blush and stammer out an awkward “yes”

hoping he didn’t notice you checking him out …..the entire time you were supposed to be focusing on your job……….. (he did but was happy about it)

as they leave with tofu’s leash in hand minhyuk looks over his shoulder and WINKS at you with a toothy grin and you…… you’re genuinely surprised you didn’t faint because it really was like looking at the sun

while jinwoo runs around the apartment showing tofu all the rooms minhyuk is unpacking all the dog equipment and more importantly dreamily thinking about you!!!!!!!!! 

the week passes in a flash and tofu quickly becomes a part of the family!!!!! but minhyuk is way more concerned with working up the nerve to ask you out when he goes back to the shelter with the paperwork. he even asks his friends for advice and has to listen to kihyun rattle on for an hour about “romance”

but when he walks into the shelter w/ tofu and jinwoo and sees you sitting at the reception desk, all his nerves fade away at your grin and lil wave…. because if you say yes he has a feeling that all the worrying will be more than worth it

(he’s right)

u go through the paperwork and everything’s fine and you happily tell jinwoo that tofu’s all his (which results in a lot of excited dolphin noises and dog yaps), but just when you think you’re going to have to say goodbye to handsome lee minhyuk he clears his throat and asks if you’re free for dinner tomorrow night

needless to say, even if you were busy you would cancel your plans …… even if you had plans with the prime minister you would cancel

the next night uncle jooheon babysits jinwoo and minhyuk takes you out for movie and a dinner …. and you have a wonderful time!!!!!

you talk about animals for half of the date …. which honestly is fine because you love that he can match your passion for animals…. you talk about jinwoo and minhyuk’s work and even briefly about jinwoo’s mom, because minhyuk feels comfortable talking openly with you in a way he hasn’t for a long long long time

these cute dates and cute texting in between go on for a month or so before minhyuk finally asks you if you can be “official” and you know he’s the type to change his relationship status on facebook and put “taken” in his ig bio and everything

you come over for dinner a lot and jinwoo LOVES you which minhyuk loves, the two of you play with tofu and you tell him random animal facts to amaze him!!!!! !! ! ! ! !!

it’s very domestic but as soon as jinwoo goes to sleep, minhyuk takes you into his room and kisses you senseless  …. you truly get the best of both worlds

minhyuk buys you matching couple sweatshirts but also a mini version for jinwoo and tofu…… puts up photos of you on the wall alongside all the ones he has of his son …… cannot sleep without knowing he’s made damn sure you know he adores you and you’re the same!!!!

when you’re sad minhyuk wraps you up in his arms and kisses you all over your face until you beg him to stop being so gross, but he also listens to you sob into his shoulder and wipes away your tears and promises you that he’ll be with you no matter what

when he’s sad he has trouble telling anyone about it, but you pick up on it easily and let him be vulnerable and tell him that he doesn’t have to smile all the time and you love him whether he’s happy or sad

at monsta x family dinners changkyun makes fun of the two of you for being so corny but minhyuk just sticks his tongue out and then smooches you loudly on the lips just to watch hyungwon gag

moving in together happens so naturally you barely blink because your relationship has always been just that ,,,,,, natural and easy ,,,,,, 

the longest lasting drama the two of you ever experience is when your cat doesn’t like tofu, any other fights are over within 24 hours because one of you gets too upset at the idea of being in a fight at all and you compromise

jinwoo tells minhyuk he never wanted a second parent before but now that he has one he’s happy and minhyuk ugly cries because finally…..he has his sweet sunshine child but he also has the love of his life and he couldn’t imagine being happier or luckier

Rising Violence Takes Huge Psychological Toll in Rio Favelas

AP, June 28, 2017

RIO DE JANEIRO--Almir Arruda rode his bicycle quickly across the City of God slum in Rio de Janeiro when he heard there was shootout between drug traffickers and police near his 4-year-old daughter’s preschool.

Arruda, a 43-year-old unemployed construction worker, arrived to find children and teachers lying on the floor to protect themselves as the pounding of bullets continued nearby. He scooped up daughter Jamile, who look terrified, and they rode the bike a few blocks until Arruda stopped to wait out the shooting--and started crying.

“If it hits me I don’t care, but what if it hits her?” Arruda said, talking about stray bullets through tears and over the sounds of gunshots close by. “I feel like a prisoner in the community.”

Amid a sharp increase in violence in favelas, or slums, millions of Rio residents are facing daily stresses akin to those in a war zone. Heavily armed drug traffickers battle for control of many favelas, and violent police operations add to the death toll and sense of fear. Last year, 920 people died during police raids or patrols in Rio state, more than double the 413 in 2013, according to Rio’s Public Security Institute. And this year’s figure is up by almost 60 percent over 2016.

To document the psychological impact of the violence on favela residents, an Associated Press team spent eight days with two families in the City of God, a slum of about 50,000 residents made famous by the 2002 Oscar-nominated film of the same name and visited six years ago by then U.S. President Barack Obama.

While there, the AP witnessed children, even toddlers, talking about violence in their community, mothers forcing their children to take cover during police patrols and a man recovering after being shot. The roar of gunfire was often present, prompting residents to break up activities when they believed the skirmish to be particularly close.

Different than hundreds of other Rio favelas that grew out of squatter communities, City of God was built in the 1960s as a housing project for people who had been forced out of other favelas. It sits just a few miles from the Olympic Park in upscale Barra da Tijuca. Despite proximity to wealth, government services are practically non-existent. Parts of the slum are covered with garbage and the stench of sewage permeates the air.

While teeming with residents, even during the day the streets are often empty because violence can erupt at any moment--residents even complain that police operations happen while children are in school.

When residents leave the slum to go to work, relatives and friends stay in touch via texts. They let them know if there has been a shooting, in which case they have to wait until it’s over to return. “Fogo Cruzado,” or “Crossfire,” is a free app created by Amnesty International Brazil that helps Rio residents track shootings in real time by combining crowd-sourcing data and monitoring social media.

On a recent Friday evening, a military police tank suddenly appeared. Shouting to alert her family, Thaisa da Silva Ribeiro grabbed 4-year-old Isaac, who was playing in the door of their building, and brought him inside. Isaac’s sister, 2-year-old Isadora, looked terrified.

“It’s not possible to get used to this, but unfortunately this is the routine in City of God,” said Ribeiro, who is pregnant.

Minutes later, Isaac cried about the incident while Isadora hugged her brother and tried to calm him down.

In war zones, children and adults can suffer post-traumatic stress disorder, anxiety, nightmares, insomnia and other psychological disorders.

Many of those symptoms are being observed in residents of slums, particularly children, according to health experts at Fiocruz, one of Brazil’s top research institutes, which is conducting a large study on health issues related to urban violence in Rio.

Leonardo Bueno, one of the researchers, says that anxiety and depression from the violence are compounded by the feeling the state has abandoned poor areas.

“All of that increases the level of illness in an area,” he said.

Fueling the tension is a widespread belief among favela residents that police see them all as criminals and will be quick to rough them up without cause.

Like Ribeiro, 45 percent of favela residents fear that police will confuse them with criminals and 75 percent believe the police act more violently in favelas than in wealthier areas, according to a survey by the Center for the Study of Safety and Citizenship at Rio’s Candido Mendes University.

Alexandre Henrique da Cruz Correia, a 29-year old father of three, was recently shot while walking from his grandmother’s home to his own.

“I passed by the police, and by the time I got to the end of the street I had been shot twice,” said Correia, showing where one of the bullets was still lodged in back of his left hip. “I have no idea where it came from.”

Stray bullets are such a concern that some families have plans of what to do during a shooting.

Suzi Souza dos Santos, 26, and her two girls and husband live in a small wooden house in one of the slum’s poorest areas. During a shootout, the family goes to a neighbor’s house made of bricks.

“We have nowhere else to go when we are caught in the crossfire,” she said.

Residents say a crushing economic crisis is fueling the sense of desperation. Unemployment in Rio de Janeiro state more than tripled from 4 percent in 2013 to 13 percent in 2016, leaving thousands in abject poverty.

“Rio is a chaos,” said Silvio Cesar Soares Gonzaga, a 46-year-old former drug dealer who became an evangelical pastor. “The violence has polluted it.”

For more than 20 years, Ana Regina de Jesus has been providing free meals four days a week. On a recent day, only about 60 of the usual 150 showed up because of a nearby shooting. During the meal, another shooting erupted, prompting some of the diners to put down their silverware and listen closely.

“These things should not happen,” said Jesus, 58. “But what can we do?”

What Did You Think It Would Be Like to Be a Parent?

This morning while at the gym, I was working out in front of a bank of televisions. One had an episode of Friends playing on it, the focus was Rachel’s baby shower. This otherwise competent professional was in a panic since she didn’t know much about babies. She thought a breast pump was a “beer bong for babies” and she was shocked that newborns have at least 10 bowel movements a day and that she shouldn’t leave an infant on the changing table while she went to the dumpster to dispose of dirty diapers. She called the bassinet, a “pretty basket” that had contained some of the gifts. In real life, there are parenting classes that guide prospective parents in the literal care and feeding of their child.

A few years ago, I was in the presence of a young woman in her early 20s who told me that she had a miscarriage after getting pregnant unexpectedly. As sad as she was over the loss, she realized that she wasn’t equipped to be a mom at that point in her life. “Think about it,” she explained, “when you have a baby, you are not raising a child. You are raising an adult.” I had not thought of it that way, but it made sense, since parents are responsible for their child until they reach adulthood. It would be a good idea to decide how you want to do that.

The show called Motherhood: The Musical played in Philadelphia a few years ago and I went with friends — some moms, some child-free. I laughed and nodded in understanding, even though I am not a biological mother. We adopted our son when he was nearly five, and I say that my stretch-marks are on my heart and not my hips. The show portrayed a mom to be who idealized the experience, until she discovered that the cute and cuddly little being that came out of her body had needs to meet that superseded her own, such as those for sleep and food. Fortunately her circle of friends came to her rescue and gave her a break so she could shower, change clothes and rest.

A mother of two and stepmother of one sometimes feels like a single parent, since her husband, a successful professional, is not as engaged and active as a father as she wishes he would be. He sometimes becomes impatient with the high intensity the youngest two embody and seems not to know how to handle their energy. He expects her to manage them when they get rambunctious. He also expects that she plans outings and activities. At times, it seems that he is the babysitter and not the daddy, when they are together. No doubt that he loves his children but isn’t certain how to be present. This is her observation. His is different. Since she is a stay at home parent, the understanding is that she will spend more time with them. The suggestion was to remind him that the relationship they forge now will positively impact their ongoing interactions. It is also likely that when they reach adolescence, they may not want quality time with dad.

A beautiful thread woven through a father child relationship is featured in a commercial for a French cell phone company, called Bouygues. In it, a father is dancing with his toddler son to the Redbone tune, Come and Get Your Love. As the boy and his father age, the song becomes a sign of love between them. 

Each of us are products of our environment; in and out of the womb, nature and nurture overlapping. The ways in which parenting is modeled is either a thumbs up or thumbs down on the ways in which we parent. And yes, that is a verb. A story about two brothers who grew up in the same household with an alcoholic father describes that each made a different choice. One became a teetotaler and one an alcoholic. When asked how that was so, the first one said, “I watched my father.”  The second one said, “I watched my father.” 

As a parent, you are indeed on stage and your children are always watching and listening. There are no perfect parents and there will be times when you fall back into unhealthy patterns, some from your upbringing, some newly acquired. Several good questions to ask yourself and share with the other parent:

Why did I become a parent? Some people do it out of expectation, some because they truly love children and want to raise them well.

What was my childhood like? If it was traumatic, what can I do to heal those wounds, so they don’t affect my parenting?

Is what I am doing or saying something I want my child to do or say? In the era in which I grew up, the line, “Do as I say, not as I do,” was standard.

Is the relationship I am in with the other parent, whether or not we are still together, what I want for my child? Even if you can’t remain together as a couple, your responsibility is to take care of this human being as lovingly as you can. Unless there is abuse perpetrated by a parent, parental alienation syndrome need not obscure the relationship.

Do I speak to my child with the same courtesy, respect and caring I want them to address me with? “Respect your elders,” is the adage taught in many families.  Kids deserve respect too.

What are the values I want them to embody? Is it important that they be kind, caring, compassionate, of service, responsible, self-respecting, successful, motivated, honest, trustworthy? Developing a conscience is important.

How can I encourage both cognitive and emotional intelligence?

Are there some family issues, like addiction and abuse that I need to address and patterns that I need to break?  Remember that your history isn’t your destiny and you are called on the break the cycle. 

How do I want to handle discipline, especially if my partner and I grew up with different styles? Violence has no place in a home which you want to be a safe haven. 

If I could see into the future, what kind of person would my child grow to be, and will I take at least partial credit for how they turn out?

“Children have never been very good at listening to their elders, but they have never failed to imitate them.” – James Baldwin

from World of Psychology https://ift.tt/34RNkAT via IFTTT

What Did You Think It Would Be Like to Be a Parent?

This morning while at the gym, I was working out in front of a bank of televisions. One had an episode of Friends playing on it, the focus was Rachel’s baby shower. This otherwise competent professional was in a panic since she didn’t know much about babies. She thought a breast pump was a “beer bong for babies” and she was shocked that newborns have at least 10 bowel movements a day and that she shouldn’t leave an infant on the changing table while she went to the dumpster to dispose of dirty diapers. She called the bassinet, a “pretty basket” that had contained some of the gifts. In real life, there are parenting classes that guide prospective parents in the literal care and feeding of their child.

A few years ago, I was in the presence of a young woman in her early 20s who told me that she had a miscarriage after getting pregnant unexpectedly. As sad as she was over the loss, she realized that she wasn’t equipped to be a mom at that point in her life. “Think about it,” she explained, “when you have a baby, you are not raising a child. You are raising an adult.” I had not thought of it that way, but it made sense, since parents are responsible for their child until they reach adulthood. It would be a good idea to decide how you want to do that.

The show called Motherhood: The Musical played in Philadelphia a few years ago and I went with friends — some moms, some child-free. I laughed and nodded in understanding, even though I am not a biological mother. We adopted our son when he was nearly five, and I say that my stretch-marks are on my heart and not my hips. The show portrayed a mom to be who idealized the experience, until she discovered that the cute and cuddly little being that came out of her body had needs to meet that superseded her own, such as those for sleep and food. Fortunately her circle of friends came to her rescue and gave her a break so she could shower, change clothes and rest.

A mother of two and stepmother of one sometimes feels like a single parent, since her husband, a successful professional, is not as engaged and active as a father as she wishes he would be. He sometimes becomes impatient with the high intensity the youngest two embody and seems not to know how to handle their energy. He expects her to manage them when they get rambunctious. He also expects that she plans outings and activities. At times, it seems that he is the babysitter and not the daddy, when they are together. No doubt that he loves his children but isn’t certain how to be present. This is her observation. His is different. Since she is a stay at home parent, the understanding is that she will spend more time with them. The suggestion was to remind him that the relationship they forge now will positively impact their ongoing interactions. It is also likely that when they reach adolescence, they may not want quality time with dad.

A beautiful thread woven through a father child relationship is featured in a commercial for a French cell phone company, called Bouygues. In it, a father is dancing with his toddler son to the Redbone tune, Come and Get Your Love. As the boy and his father age, the song becomes a sign of love between them. 

Each of us are products of our environment; in and out of the womb, nature and nurture overlapping. The ways in which parenting is modeled is either a thumbs up or thumbs down on the ways in which we parent. And yes, that is a verb. A story about two brothers who grew up in the same household with an alcoholic father describes that each made a different choice. One became a teetotaler and one an alcoholic. When asked how that was so, the first one said, “I watched my father.”  The second one said, “I watched my father.” 

As a parent, you are indeed on stage and your children are always watching and listening. There are no perfect parents and there will be times when you fall back into unhealthy patterns, some from your upbringing, some newly acquired. Several good questions to ask yourself and share with the other parent:

Why did I become a parent? Some people do it out of expectation, some because they truly love children and want to raise them well.

What was my childhood like? If it was traumatic, what can I do to heal those wounds, so they don’t affect my parenting?

Is what I am doing or saying something I want my child to do or say? In the era in which I grew up, the line, “Do as I say, not as I do,” was standard.

Is the relationship I am in with the other parent, whether or not we are still together, what I want for my child? Even if you can’t remain together as a couple, your responsibility is to take care of this human being as lovingly as you can. Unless there is abuse perpetrated by a parent, parental alienation syndrome need not obscure the relationship.

Do I speak to my child with the same courtesy, respect and caring I want them to address me with? “Respect your elders,” is the adage taught in many families.  Kids deserve respect too.

What are the values I want them to embody? Is it important that they be kind, caring, compassionate, of service, responsible, self-respecting, successful, motivated, honest, trustworthy? Developing a conscience is important.

How can I encourage both cognitive and emotional intelligence?

Are there some family issues, like addiction and abuse that I need to address and patterns that I need to break?  Remember that your history isn’t your destiny and you are called on the break the cycle. 

How do I want to handle discipline, especially if my partner and I grew up with different styles? Violence has no place in a home which you want to be a safe haven. 

If I could see into the future, what kind of person would my child grow to be, and will I take at least partial credit for how they turn out?

“Children have never been very good at listening to their elders, but they have never failed to imitate them.” – James Baldwin

from World of Psychology https://ift.tt/34RNkAT via theshiningmind.com

WU Reviews: Mindhunter Season 2 Episodes 7 & 8 reviewed by Ariana Zarate '11 (@arianazarate89) and Leah Way '13 (@leahway)

It’s the penultimate Mindhunter Monday! Ariana and Leah have combined forces to give WU readers an in-depth review of Mindhunter Season 2, which you can now binge watch on Netflix. If you want to watch the show and then read their recaps, we are posting episode-by-episode reviews on WU. This show is creepy and disturbing, so be forewarned that they may spoil some weird moments for you. But if that’s your thing, dive into the bizarre and wonderful world of Mindhunter!

Episode 7

Tench is slowly killing himself by working Monday to Thursday in Atlanta, then travelling to Virginia for the weekend before returning to Atlanta. He’s holding himself together with a ton of cigarettes, coffee, and bourbon. By this episode we’ve been yelling at Tench to just ASK to be taken off the case so he can focus on the BIG DEAL at home, but something always comes up and he moves on. Nancy is guaranteed to break sooner or later; playing single mother to a child who is slowly regressing (read bed-wetting) because of the trauma he experienced being involved in the murder of a toddler is impossible to do alone four days of the week. We strongly believe this marriage is at risk if Tench doesn’t prioritize his family, fast.

Speaking of tough: Nancy receives a surprise visit from the deceased toddler’s mother. She asks to come in and in unison, we shouted NO! to the screen, but Nancy lets her in. Basically, the mother says she’s there to say she forgives Brian. She asks, can she meet Brian? And once more, we yell NO! to the screen. Fortunately, Nancy declines and sends the woman on her way. 

Back in Atlanta, the plumber proves to be a comedic dead end. The plumber admits he was masturbating to the Penthouse magazine because his wife is pregnant at home and so he hasn’t had sex in a long time. He’s dismissed, and will probably never masturbate again. 

Ford’s next idea is to set up memorials at some of the dump sites to hopefully lure the killer out. They hope that the killer won’t be able to resist visiting a dump site with a memorial onsite. The mothers agree to allow Ford to try this stunt, but bureaucracy throws a wrench, a hammer, and a whole kitchen sink into the plan. From tedious paperwork required to obtaining permission to post advertisement flyers, to the Ikea-level assembly-required crosses for the memorial, nothing goes well. Kudos to Ford though, who didn’t give up and ran his ass through the march carrying a cross. He doesn’t make it on time and the look on the mother’s face says everything without having to say a single word. What is going on with Dr. Carr and Gunn? Gunn is extra pissy and tells Dr. Carr she is being pulled away from doing interviews. He tells her he wants her sticking to research and training new agents instead, which is bullshit as Gregg can’t interview for shit.

Dr. Carr’s relationship with Kay seems to be going OK though. It’s nice to see that, even in the 80s, lesbians were U-hauling. Dr. Carr awkwardly asks Kay to move in with her by saying she has a “spare bedroom” she can use. Kay rightfully asks, are you looking for a roommate or a girlfriend? Your move, Dr. Carr.

Episode 8

The body count is up to a staggering 20 children; the pressure is up even more. With the upcoming concert by Sammy Davis Jr. and Frank Sinatra, Ford gets another brilliant idea: advertise they are hiring additional personnel in hopes that the killer will be lured by this big event. Bureaucracy strikes again (red tape might be the true unsub this season) and there isn’t enough time to advertise and interview everyone. Forensically, there have been some new developments: the team are certain the perpetrator drives a police-like vehicle, lives with his parents, and owns a dog. Additionally there were some fibers found on the latest body, which means they have some good physical evidence to use for future comparison.

Back in Virginia, chez Tench, Nancy strongly hints they could benefit from a fresh new start by moving elsewhere. She also off-handedly tells Tench to pick up Brian from school because she doesn’t want to. Father and son stop for ice cream and Tench desperately tries to connect with his son. In a moment of vulnerability, Tench admits he is scared. This seems to get through to Brian, but he still doesn’t talk, though he at least looks like he’s listening actively.

The next body in Atlanta is discovered in a river; the killer has clearly heard the news report about the fiber evidence on the previous body and has adjusted disposal methods. This gives Ford yet another idea: placing surveillance on all bridges in Atlanta to monitor for suspicious activity. They monitor the bridges at nighttime for 4-5 weeks with no luck and at the end of the montage, we too were itchy with the mosquito sounds. On the last day of Operation Bridge Watch (not actual name), the team is ready to pull the plug on this manpower heavy operation. Good thing they’re about to luck out. One officer reports hearing a splash in the river. They quickly pull the vehicle over, and out steps Wayne Williams. Hint hint, this is the guy that is charged for two of the murders in real life so the end is near with just one more episode to go! Meanwhile in Dr.Carr-land, things get real rocky. As they are about to go out on a date, Kay’s ex-husband shows up and Kay remembers it is her turn with her son that day. Kay asks Dr. Carr to wait inside while she speaks with her ex but curiosity gets the best of Dr. Carr and she sneaks over to the front door to eavesdrop. She overhears Kay refer to her as “just a friend” and someone not important; with that she storms out the back. Later Kay confronts her and asks why she’s been avoiding her. While Dr. Carr has every right to be upset at what she overheard, she picks some unrelated arguments with Kay. She claims she has no idea who Kay is because of the way she spoke to her ex and son. (Oh you mean like how everyone does child-speak? That is NORMAL, Dr.Carr!) To be honest, we’re a little disappointed in how Dr. Carr chose to handle this argument. To no one’s surprise, the two break up.

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