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millionsvash · 10 months

Note

Hey what's up! It's ya boy!

I humbly ask if it pleases you my holy ember, could you provide some first kiss headcanons on the trigun boys?

(Vash, Knives, Wolfwood, Legato, Roberto and Livio)

I love you, you seggsy ass mf!

Oh, you think I'm sexy? When are we kissing?

Trigun men and their first kiss reaction headcanons

Vash the Stampede

A first kiss with Vash would be an actual train wreck. He never thought he'd get to this point. All he knows about kissing is what he's seen other people do.

So he goes straight in for a kiss, and he doesn't tilt his head, so he hits noses with whoever he's trying to kiss and is extremely confused why it didn't work.

He has to have the steps explained to him out loud. This includes having to explain that he has to tilt his head to the side because his nose sticks out. He's not dumb; he just never really realized how much the nose would get in the way.

Once he gets through all the steps, the kiss is really quick. It's sort of like a peck.

However, once he gets that first peck, he can't stop. He's so excited about it that he's just pecking over and over again.

He also really loves to hold your face while he does this. He likes to run his thumbs over the flesh of your cheeks while he smothers you with pecks.

Of course, once it's over, he's asking if he can do it all over again.

Millions Knives

Knives acts like he doesn't even want a kiss. He comes up with a hundred reasons why kissing is stupid, and he won't stoop to that level.

In reality, he's saying this exact thing in his head. (Click the link; it's a YouTube video.)

He's so in denial that when he leans down to kiss you, he's like, "I guess I'll humor you with a kiss," when he's the one who wants it more than you do.

The kiss is really long. He holds it for so long that you have to slap his face to get him to stop so you can catch your breath.

When he pulls away, he's pouting and saying, "That was stupid; I can't see why anyone would enjoy that. Maybe if I try again, I'll find out."

So once you catch your breath, he goes in for another one. He will do anything to avoid admitting he loves it.

Nicholas D. Wolfwood

Wolfwood acts like a groom about to see his bride for the first time when he thinks about kissing. The poor guy is fidgeting all over the place and sweating so badly.

He'd probably accidentally mess it up by burping on your face and freaking out, thinking you don't want to kiss anymore.

He'd probably say something dumb like, "Oh, I'm sweatin' more than a whore in church." and dramatically wipe the nonexistent sweat from his forehead.

When he kisses, all you can taste is the obscene amount of tobacco in his mouth, but for his first kiss, he's actually quite good at it.

He even sweeps you off your feet, bridal style, and dips you down to give you a long kiss.

Legato Bluesummers

Legato's entire goal is to make you freak out by kissing him, because messing with humans is really funny to him.

So right before you lean in to kiss him, he sticks out his freakishly long tongue and says something like, "I can't wait to taste you, human." (Despite being a human himself...idiot.)

Then, of course, when he actually gets kissed, he's quite confused. He gets a bit flustered, and then he gets annoyed at himself for getting flustered by it.

He's sort of like Knives, where he lives in denial that he enjoyed it or needs it, but finds excuses to pull you in for more.

He'd probably end it by saying something like, "Don't think I like you, filthy human."

You know he totally likes you.

Roberto De Niro

If you're kissing this man, he is 100% drunk during it. That's when he's at his dumbest and clearly not thinking straight.

He'll egg you on, especially if you get shy about it. He'll say things like, "What? I thought you said you were strong and brave!" or quote something you said in a different situation.

If you get even shyer, he'll be laughing at you, but in a sort of teasing, flirty way.

He's an older man, so he has that older flirty charm, but when he's drunk, he has the youthful playfulness in him.

He'll grab your chin and say, "Here, I'll show you," even though this is also his first kiss.

Still, for the first kiss, he's really good at it, even when intoxicated. He even teases you by running his tongue across your teeth while you kiss.

Then, when you pull away, he'll tease you by saying, "I guess that was okay," just to watch you squirm.

Livio the Double Fang

If inexperienced kisser had a picture next to it, that would be a picture of Livio.

Livio has never even thought about kissing anyone. He's always stayed in his own head and kept his mind focused on his job and what he has to get done.

So when the chance to kiss comes, he's a huge mess. His hands are shaking, and he can't seem to speak a single word.

He becomes a deer in headlights and stutters, just trying to confirm that you really want to kiss.

When you pull him in, he'll melt under the touch. He will savor every second of it like it's the best moment of his life.

His eyes are full of life and delight at the feeling.

He's still flustered at the end of his first kiss, but he's able to speak enough to ask if you two can do it again. He's a puppy, like Vash.

#trigun #vash the stampede #trigun x reader #trigun fanfic #vash #tri98 #trigun stampede #millions knives #wolfwood x you #nicholas d. wolfwood #trigun wolfwood #legato x reader #legato bluesummers #livio x reader #roberto x reader #trigun headcanons #breakfast is served!#roberto de niro #livio the double fang

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joshlmbrt · 3 months

Text

NOW PLAYING;

Prom Song (Gone Wrong) - j. darling oneshot

‘YOU ARE BY FAR THE BRIGHTEST STAR I’VE EVER SEEN & I’VE EVER DREAMED.’

w; jimmy is absolutely precious, a BUNCH of fluff.

an; this SONG IS jimmy darling - i will not be hearing anything other than agreement!

-> VALENTINES PLAYLIST HERE

“One strawberry milkshake, please, doll.” The small drawl made your eyes quickly look up, cheeks tingling with a blush and a flutter to your heart.

“Now, Jimmy Darling, what are you doin’ here?” You tilt your head. A curl had slipped and rested against pink cheeks, it had him wanting to push it away and kiss you silly.

“Came to visit one of my favorite workers.” His lips curl into a smile. His dimples deepen and a small wink gets sent your way - you are sure he’s trying to kill you.

You glance over your shoulder, looking behind the counted. Mae sends you a look, eyes darting down to where Jimmy sits, leather gloves resting on the table.

You roll your eyes, looking back at him. “Mae?” You’re only joking - but you could still remember the first time you saw him speaking to her and the jealousy that had hit you. Then the anger when she found out what was underneath the gloves that he was afraid to remove unless he was in a safe space.

His smile immediately drops - small panic crossing his features. “I- No. I meant-” You cut him off with a giggle, shaking your head.

“I’m only teasin’ you,” You quickly jot down the milkshake before peeking up at him. “One strawberry milkshake, comin’ up.” You give a sweet smile that has him swooning and smiling back.

You spin on your heel, walking away and towards the counter. He waits patiently, eyes peeking back up and awkwardly meeting with Mae’s. He quickly looks away, head shaking a bit.

A cup is placed in front of him, the perfect amount of whipped cream covering the sugary treat and a cherry dropped on top. “For you. On the house.”

He frowns a bit, but takes a sip nonetheless. He clears his throat when you turn around again. “Wait!” You stop and look back at him. “Would… Uh, would you want to-”

You grin. “I get off in an hour.”

He lets out a small relieved breath, nodding. “I’ll wait.”

You give him a smile nod and a shy smile, walking towards another table.

💌

He pluck a flower from the ground, grunting and tossing it to the side when he sees it wasn’t a perfect one. It all needed to be perfect.

Eve’s perfectly arched brow lifts, her legs carrying her over to the boy who had grown sweaty from the sun shining down on his glistening neck. “Jimmy,” He jerks up, spinning around. Her eyes glance down at his hands. “Uh, what are you doing?” She tilts her head, eyes going back up to his face.

His hand comes up and wipes the drop of sweat that had started to roll down his temple. “Well, I was trying to get this area set up for a picnic for… someone.”

A smile spreads over her lips, arms crossing over her chest. “Is it that gal down at the diner? The pretty one you’ve been talking to?”

He smiles, nodding. “Yeah… her, she’s different, ‘ya know? Not scared of me. Doesn’t judge me. I want to be sure everything is perfect for her.”

Eve nods, lips pursing together. “Tell ‘ya what,” She starts, catching his attention. “You go get a shower, you’re sweatin’ buckets. Get dressed up and go pick ‘er up. I’ll be sure to have this done before you get back.”

“You’d do that for me?”

“I trust you and your judgment, Jimmy. If you really like this girl and want to make it perfect, then you need to trust me,” She nods. “I’ll get this done for ‘ya. Now, go on.”

His smile grows wider and he nods, making his way towards his Caravan.

Eve smiles, watching him before turning back and walking back towards the group. Everyone turns to look at her.

“We need to help Jimmy with something,” She starts. “And we need to make it perfect.”

💌

A quick change out of your dress that had felt like it smelt of hamburger and steak and into a yellow dress with white heels, and makeup touch up in the bathroom, you were ready to walk out of the diner.

You wave to Diana, one of the nicer co-workers, before pushing the door open and smooth down your dress before looking up and across the street. There was the boy who was haunting your thoughts, leaning against his motorcycle.

There’s a small blush that tingles at your cheeks - a feeling becoming all too familiar when you land your eyes on Jimmy Darling.

He’s already smiling, his pretty dimples making you swoon all over again. He’s changed into a different outfit.

He lifts his arms and waves. You wave back, smile never faltering. Your eyes are quickly looking both ways before quickly crossing the street.

“Hi, doll.”

“Hi.” Your face burns when his soft lips press against your temple. He holds out his gloved hand, helping you onto the back of the motorcycle.

“I’m gonna put this on you, okay?” He tilts his head, holding up the helmet.

“Where’s yours?” You question when he places it onto your head, nudging your chin up. He tightens the strap.

“I’ll be fine, doll. Don’t worry your pretty little head,” He grins, swinging his leg over and sitting in front of you. “Just hold on tight, yeah?”

He peeks over his shoulders. You nod, arms wrapping around his sides and rest your chin against his shoulder. “Yeah.” You smile.

He sends you another heart melting wink before turning the motorcycle on, revving it up before pulling out onto the main road.

You squeezed him extra when he sped up.

💌

The grass was itching at your bare legs but you didn’t mind.

Not when his hand was in yours, leading you past the carousel and towards a small pond where he had set up a blanket and some little snacks.

Jimmy’s brows lift as he stares at the picnic that had been set up - it was perfect.

“This is for me?” Your eyes widen and look over at him quickly, blinking away the unshed tears.

He looks bashful, shy, when he looks away, ducking his head and nodding. “Yeah,” He wipes at the sweat that had collected around his hairline from the sweltering sun. “Only for the prettiest.” And there’s the charming boy you know all too well.

It’s your turn to dunk your head, giggling and shaking your head. He pulls you closer towards the red and pink blanket that had a smattering of flowers decorating it. Your dress fans around you when you sit down, Jimmy sitting across from you.

“It’s not much.”

“You kiddin’?” You look at him. “Jimmy, this is… the most thoughtful thing someone’s ever done for me. I love it.”

And when he gives you a sweet smile, you can’t help but lean over and press a kiss to the corner of his mouth, hand lifting and wiping the gloss away.

💌

“Close your eyes.” He says. Your brows lift and you sit up, eyes closing. He smiles and takes a moment to admire you quietly before looking away, grabbing the small box he had stuffed in the bottom of his basket.

He moves in behind you. His lips press against your shoulder causing you to giggle quickly, instinctively lifting it. He grins against your skin, opening the box and pulling out the locket he had saved up for, putting it around your neck and clasping it.

It took a moment, but he practiced because he wanted to be the one to put it on for you.

“Okay. Open.” He leans on his hand, staring at you from the side, hand pushing back your hair so he could see your face. Your eyes open, hand lifting to where the heart rested on your chest.

“Jimmy, is this a locket?” You smile, looking down. Your finger traces over the J.

He looks down, nodding. “Yeah… If you don’t like it, you can-" You shut him up with a kiss, hand coming up to cradle his cheek, the pad of your thumb sliding across his cheekbone.

You slowly pull away, grinning at the dazed look he had. “You think too much, Jimmy Darling.”

His grin is dopey. “Just want the best for my girl.”

Eve hides behind the tent when you lean in again and press your lips to his.

“How does Miss like it?” Ma Petite asks, a small giggle erupting her. Eve smiles and picks her up, walking away.

“She loved it.”

💌 jimmy tags; @slvt4jamesmarch, @maeriavizsendingjpmdose, @taintandviolent, @officerrrfriendly, @kaismanwich, @taff0di1l

thank you for reading! comments, reblogs, requests, likes, & feedback is encouraged, welcomed, & deeply appreciated! 🧸

#jimmy darling x fem!reader #jimmy darling x reader #jimmy darling x you #evan peters x fem!reader #evan peters x reader #james patrick march x reader #kit walker x reader #kai anderson x reader #colin zabel x reader #warren lipka x reader #divider by #crazyfrm

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whatisreggieshortfor · 2 years

Text

The Choice We Should’ve Gotten

In the wake of CherryGate and with the arrival of Reese, you have a very serious choice to make.

Jake x MC

In the wake of CherryGate, you took a hard look at your time in the villa. While your coupling with Jasper had been a nightmare, he managed to be happy with Allegra. But you felt like every couple you’d been in had flopped. It felt like Jake gave up on you, saying that you should pursue Levi. Levi had been dead set telling you how much he wanted to couple you, and the second he did you found him kissing Cherry.

Were you the problem?

You voiced that concern to your best mate, and Tim promptly swatted you on the back of the head, demanding that you reevaluate your perception because “ain’t nobody allowed to rag on my mates, especially not themselves, ya knob.” You laughed at him and he grinned back.

You’d had a talk with Tim at one point, the playful banter between you confusing both of you about where your friendship stood, but you both agreed wholeheartedly that that was all it was. You knew Jen was planning on picking him, and realized that all you felt for him was happiness.

Which left you feeling stuck. Tim was the closest connection you’d made, wasn’t he?

Levi and Mason were challenging each other constantly throughout the days leading up to the next recoupling, and Talia’s advice rang through your ears over and over again. Don’t let a mistake destroy a connection.

The crackle of the fire was the only noise breaking the silence as everyone waited with bated breath to see who you’d pick. There was Levi- the Olympian that was so sure you had some connection that ran deep, but he’d only shown you the shallow end of what he could feel. Mason- honestly, you felt like he was more shallow than Levi sometimes, overly cocky on the first day because he felt like he was king shit. Talia- but while you’d always had fun hanging out with her, you knew deep down that the two of you were just meant to be mates. And then there was Jake…Sure, he’d given you up without much fight, but it wasn’t that he didn’t like you. You knew that. And when you thought about who was always there for you, you knew there was Tim, but Jake was always your anchor. Tim encouraged you to have fun, but Jake encouraged you to feel what you needed to feel.

But if you picked Jake, who would that leave for Talia?

“Oí! Y/N!” You shook your head at Tim’s voice, snapping back to reality, “You gonna pick or what, mate?”

You blinked, glancing at each of the couples, then at the boys waiting, and finally at Talia. “I need to talk to you first.” You grabbed her arm, quickly wandering a few feet from the fire pit. You weren’t even sure if this was allowed, but unless someone showed to usher you back, you were gonna take the chance.

“Whoa, babes, you look absolutely terrified.”

“The story you told me- about your parents.” She worried her lip as she nodded, watching you carefully, “What if I’m not the one that needs to do the forgiving to get the connection back?”

She blinked, “I- what?”

You ran a hand through your hair, mussing it up slightly, “Listen, I know I have to pick quickly, but how much would you hate me if-“ you swallowed, “How much would you hate me if I wanted to pick Jake?”

To your surprise, a massive smile bloomed across her face, “It’s about damn time you noticed.” You blinked at her and she laughed softly, shaking her head, “Boy’s absolutely mad over you. Don’t you worry for a second about me.”

“But you don’t fancy-“

“Naw, I don’t fancy either of those blokes, but either way it’ll be a friendship couple for me.”

You nodded at her, and she guided you back to the others, looking far more anxious than they did before you stepped away. Tim called out, “Y/N, babes, I don’t wanna rush you but even I’m sweatin’ and I’m not even an option!”

You shot him a nervous smile, but something about the look on your face made his light up, and you had the mild thought that you wouldn’t be surprised if he could read your mind at this point. Clearing your throat, you stepped forward, “I’ve spent…days honestly, questioning my time here. And throughout that time, only one person has really stuck out to me. Aside from my pain in the ass best mate over there,” Tim stuck his tongue out at you and you reciprocated the gesture before continuing, “I’ve only made a connection with one person. And I hope he can forgive for almost losing sight of it. So the boy I want to couple up with is…Jake.” Tim immediately let out whoops and cheers, Jen, Rohan, and Talia cheering right along with him. The boys around the fire pit were another story. Levi and Mason were slack jawed, clearly having forgotten that Jake was even an option, and Jake…he looked frozen, and you wondered if you made a mistake as your shoulders drooped. Rohan seemed to register his frozen best mate before anyone else did, running over from Cherry’s side and shaking the hell out of him.

“Jakey! Come on, Sweetcheeks!” Rohan’s voice finally seemed to register to him, and Jake shook himself out of his stupor.

“I’m- uh, I’m sorry. What’s happening?” Your shoulders slumped even more, and you bit your lip. Was it a mistake? You could vaguely register Rohan saying something before you heard Jake’s deep voice, “I didn’t just imagine that?”

Talia let out a cackle, and between her and Rohan, they grabbed hold of Jake’s arms and shoved him your way. He didn’t try to hug you or anything, so you sat next to him a little disheartened. In the background noise, you could barely make out Talia choosing Mason, and shoving him away when he tried to press a kiss to her cheek.

When everyone separated, you moved off by yourself, sitting next to the pool and kicking your bare feet in the water. You stared up at the moon, until your view was obscured as Jake leaned over you from behind. “This is almost poetic, you realize that, right?” You blinked, entirely unsure what he meant, but he seemed to realize that, “Last time we coupled up. This was where we went.” He sat next to you, and you huffed a humorless laugh.

“Yeah. Yeah, we did.” You sighed, glancing at him for a moment before looking back to the sky, “Can I ask you something?”

“Always.”

“Did you…not want me to pick you?”

He sighed to himself more than out loud, and you could see him trying to figure out his words in your peripheral, “I was surprised. I had assumed you’d take Levi back, or you’d pick Mason. I didn’t think I was an option.”

“Why? Wait- no, I get why. I know that I screwed up. When we coupled up last time, you said something about me fancying them. I didn’t make myself clear then. When I said I thought something could happen with one of them later- I didn’t mean I wanted to go after them. I meant if we didn’t work. When I picked you last time, it was because I genuinely wanted, ya know, you.” You watched him as you finished, hoping your words sunk in.

Jake looked like he was processing, before he glanced at you with a hint of mischief in his eyes, “Do you remember what else you told me last time we coupled up? You told me to be more open, spontaneous.” Your eyes widened as you realized where you were, but there was no escape as his big arms scooped you up, the sounds of your mixed laughter echoing before you both sunk beneath the surface of the water.

You grinned at him through the clear darkness, wrapping your arms around him as the two of you bobbed to the surface.

You pressed a kiss to his lips, tasting of chlorine and something so inherently Jake, “This.” You muttered against him, “This is what I’ve been missing.”

“You don’t need to anymore.” He grinned, dropping the two of you beneath the water again. You felt a splash not too far off, breaching the surface the same time as Tim, Jake’s arms locked around your waist.

“You finally found that love, didn’t ya slag?” Jen splashed down beside him, to both of your surprise, not a second after the words left Tim’s mouth and you grinned cheekily.

“You’re one to talk, ya bellend.” Jake’s laugh rumbled through your back where it was pressed to his chest. And you knew it was worth the drama of Levi to be as sure of your choice as you were right now.

Masterlist

#love island the game #litg season 1 #litg #litg jake #jake x mc

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hysteria-things · 1 month

Note

You can't touch this

My, my, my, my

(You can't touch this)

Music hits me so hard

Makes me say "Oh, my Lord

Thank you for blessing me

With a mind to rhyme and two hyped feet"

It feels good when you know you're down

A super dope homeboy from the Oaktown

And I'm known as such

And this is a beat, uh, you can't touch

I told you, homeboy

You can't touch this

Yeah, that's how we livin', and ya know

You can't touch this

Look in my eyes, man

You can't touch this

Yo, let me bust the funky Iyrics

You can't touch this

Fresh new kicks and pants

You got it like that

Now you know you wanna dance

So, move outta your seat

And get a fly girl

And catch this beat

While it's rolling

Hold on

Pump a little bit and let 'em know it's going on

Like that, like that

Cold on a mission, so fall on back

Let 'em know that you're too much

And this is a beat, uh, they can't touch

Yo, I told you

You can't touch this

Why you standing there, man?

You can't touch this

Yo, sound the bell, school's in, sucker

You can't touch this

Give me a song or rhythm

Making them sweat, that's what I'm giving them

Now, they know

You talk about the Hammer

When you're talkin 'bout a show

That's hyped and tight

Singers are sweatin'

So pass them a wipe or a tape

To learn

What it's gonna take in the 90's to burn

The chart's legit

Either work hard or you might as well quit

That's word, because, you know

You can't touch this

Break it down!

Stop, Hammer time!

"Go with the flow", it is said

If you can't groove to this, then you probably are dead

So, wave your hands in the air

Bust a few moves

Run your fingers through your hair

This is it, for a winner

Dance to this and you're gonna get thinner

Now move, slide your rump

Just for a minute, let's all do the bump

(Bump, bump, bump)

Yeah

You can't touch this

Look, man

You can't touch this

You'll probably get hyped, boy, 'cause you know you can't

You can't touch this

Ring the bell, school's back in

Break it down!

Stop, Hammer time!

You can't touch this

Break it down!

Stop, Hammer time!

Every time you see me

That Hammer's just so hype

I'm dope on the floor

And I'm magic on the mic

Now, why would I ever

Stop doing this

With others making records

That just don't hit?

I toured around the world

From London to The Bay

It's "Hammer! Go, Hammer! MC Hammer! Yo, Hammer!"

And the rest can go and play

"U Can't Touch This"

You can't touch this

Yeah

You can't touch this

I told you

You can't touch this

Too hype, you can't touch this

Yo, we're outta here

You can't touch this

very inspirational

#. ˚ ◞ ♡ haleigh’s inbox!

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angel-bubbles · 2 years

Text

i have decided i have more to say about the shaw pack playing baseball hehe baseball bois <3

- milo being catcher with his hat backwards sweaty af cussing out anyone who complains about being hot

- ‘oh YOURE sweatin’? try havin all this god damn gear on your back and you get back to me on that’

- and the taunting when a new batter comes up wooooowee

- mans has his trash talk down to a science, there have been multiple times milos even caught the ump off guard

- after long consideration i’m thinking davey is 3rd basemen and ash is short stop

- asher likes to fuck with david though, and with them being so close on the field nothing can stop him

- (short stop/third base besties supremacy… is this me projecting? yea.)

- david gets courtesy walked a lot. his hitting skills are things of legend

- when the pitcher starts lobbing it milo and ash get pissed in the dug out

- ‘what are ya so scare of eh?’ opposing team pitcher just shaking his head

- david hitting a homer off of a shitty throw away pitch bc he was tired of being walked agdkfkhs

#redacted asmr #redacted davey #redacted milo #redacted asher #this went way longer than i intended #but i have SO many thoughts #catcher milo <3 i can’t let that one go #still not sure if i’m happy w/ davey @ 3rd but #the third&short dynamic screams david&asher

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herotome · 1 year

Note

DAENG NEEDS SOME LOVE— how would he react if he phoned MC for some after-basketball care and both MC and LI rush out of the apartment half-dressed and clearly abt to have spicy time or were having spicy time? Also who would Daeng approve of most lmfao

sdjkfbfdskjbk after-basketball care and also sdkjfbdsjk your landlord approves of NONE???? Get dressed, thots

Warden: Nooo not the superpower registration guy noooo! Your landlord's sweatin and making himself scarce.

Griffin: Who's this little twink-- oh no why is she asking me about housing code violations even tho she's half naked and should be the vulnerable one. oh god why is he smirking like he's about to get my tenant a discount. n--no---

Mia: Uh oh goodbye again. scary.

Dart: ... kind of approves of Dart tho ngl. but ya boy's real intense so Daeng's not about to show it.

Jade: Whoa can I get her autograph, Daeng genuinely a lil bit starstruck

#basketball boy #herotome ask #RO: everyone #slight spoilers h e h

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faveficarchive · 1 year

Text

CREDIT DEUX

By IseQween

January 2006

Xena and Gabrielle work through some post-obsession issues following Aphrodite's mischief in the third season episode FINS, FEMMES AND GEMS. I dedicate this fish ' um ' story to "Momma ROC." -- IQ

"Gabrielle'. Think there's something about yourself you're not satisfied with."

"Humph. Other than the fact that no one gives me credit for anything, and everyone thinks I'm a silly sidekick?"

"Heeyah!"

Gabrielle swept the man's legs from under him and whirled to defend against two more attackers. Except, they suddenly went flying across the room. She looked up to see a pair of brown boots attached to a leather-clad body swinging from a rope wrapped around a ceiling beam. The boots hit a wall, ran around it, pushed off, and disappeared into a handful of gang members, who crashed to the floor like pottery. Only one dared - or could - get up.

"Yiyiyiyiyi!"

Xena somersaulted the short distance to her last opponent, did a handstand, locked her legs around his upper body, and tossed him out the door. Some of the inn patrons began tying up the bodies littering the place. Others surrounded their hero.

"Did you see that?!" A boy imitated Xena's moves. "Whop! Bam! Plunk!"

"Thank the gods you came! We are forever in your debt."

Xena held up her hand. "I'm glad we could -."

"Xeena! Xeena! Xeena!"

Xena beckoned for Gabrielle to join her. "Listen, if it wasn't for - ."

"Xeena! Xeena! Xeena!"

The warrior grabbed Gabrielle and pushed their way through to the stairs. She stood on the second step. "Quiet! Everybody settle down!"

The crowd's yells dimmed to murmurs.

"In case you didn't notice, there's another name ya oughtta be shouting." Xena beamed at her partner. "Gabrielle!"

"Yeah, she's a cutie."

"A 'cutie'?!" Xena's eyes narrowed at the man unfortunate enough to notice the wrong physical asset. "She could take you out with one swing. Like she did those thugs."

"Um, Xena?" Gabrielle tugged on her partner's arm.

"No." The warrior pulled loose. She stepped down and glared at the speaker before sweeping her eyes around the others gathered. "I don't need thanks. Since you're givin' it, give it to both of us."

"Yes," a woman agreed, "the child did help. It's only right -."

"Child?!"

"Xena, really. Please don't make a -."

"What? A scene? We already did that, dontcha think? They seemed to like my act well enough." Xena pointed at the bound ruffians. "This 'cute child' was in it the whole way. Sweatin,' puttin' everything on the line while the rest of ya gawked. Maybe fear's made you forget your manners?" She cupped her hand to her ear. "Now, what was it you wanted to say?"

"Thank you, Gabrielle," a few mumbled.

"Sorry. Didn't quite hear that."

The whole roomed seemed to take a deep breath before erupting in, "Thank you, Gabrielle!"

Xena nodded. "All right then. C'mon, Gabrielle. We're done here." She strode through the path that opened to the exit.

"Xena?" The warrior was already untethering Argo when Gabrielle caught up to her. "What's gotten into you? I mean, I appreciate -."

"Idiots." Xena muttered to herself as she led the trio to the road out.

"Xena!"

"What?"

"That really wasn't necessary. I don't need -."

"You do." Xena kept striding as if toward some battlefield. "They do. I do."

Gabrielle struggled to keep up. "Is this about that spell Aphrodite put on us? Because of my babblings about being overlooked? Your promise to give me more credit?"

Mouth puckered, Xena kept her gaze forward. "It's about time. Shoulda seen it before."

Gabrielle put her hand on the warrior's arm. "Xena, I know you appreciate me. You're the only one I care about."

The warrior stopped. "You care about this hero stuff, right? Ya want it to be about entertainment? Who can do the best flips?" She snorted in disgust. "I didn't mind so much, when it was mainly me. It's not anymore. There's a 'cute' village girl, who didn't have to be a seasoned killer to protect people from one. From bunches of `em at a time. If folks can't see that, what's the point?" She turned and continued down the road.

Gabrielle stared open mouthed at the warrior's back. For once at a loss for words.

*****

"Xena?" Gabrielle scowled at her companion. "You been using my scrolls again? In the bushes?"

"What?"

"Could've sworn this piece was longer."

"Huh." Xena glanced innocently at the object in question. "Nope, learned my lesson about that mistake." She resumed saddling Argo. "Sure you didn't mix it up with another one? Maybe write more'n you thought?"

"Well '. I did kinda go ' overboard ' with my musings." Gabrielle winced. "Most of it not fit for intelligent consumption."

"How come?"

"Um, it was during my obsession with myself. My perfection." Gabrielle shuddered. "You know - `I'm the ultimate fantasy?'"

"Ah. Your 'little minx' phase. You mention nearly drowning in your reflection? Spitting in my face?"

"Funny. But no. At least not the part about you." Gabrielle smirked. "You weren't exactly the center of my attention then."

"Only fair. After all, you worked the hardest acquiring the Mystic Diamond. What with the teensy distraction I had fishing."

"`Teensy?!' You take even understatement to the limit."

"What's that s`posed ta mean?"

"Fishing? Like you need more enchantment to go off the deep end there." Gabrielle slid her eyes Xena's way. "I'd say you had a 'teensy' issue with obsessions long before Aphrodite's spell."

"Pffft. Name one."

"Let's see '. Keeping weapons outta my hands. Protecting me from unsavory types."

"Lotta good that did."

"Heh. Didn't say it had to." Gabrielle sighed. "We won't count Hope. That one did work. Eventually. Thankfully." She exchanged sad smiles with Xena. "And what about this giving me credit thing? Don'tcha think you're getting a tad carried away?"

Xena adjusted her bracers. "If you only knew," she said under her breath.

"What was that? You agreeing with me?"

"I'm used to going full out. Not pulling punches. It's possible my ' focus ' gets a little extreme sometimes."

"Uh huh. Nothing half-hearted about the Warrior Princess. One of the things I love, by the way." Gabrielle studied the scroll in her hand. "Wouldn't set a good example, I guess, obsessing over this." Shrugging, she stuck it in her bag. "Could be I'm getting addled in my advancing years."

"Hope not. Not this soon anyway. By your 20's, I'll have to leave you somewhere for safe keeping." Xena smirked. "Aphrodite. She'll keep ya young."

"Brrrr. More like truly drive me to early crone-age."

"Eh, I wouldn't worry about it. You've been a busy girl. Lots on your mind." Xena finished securing the bedrolls to Argo's back. "Ready?"

"Uh huh." Gabrielle slung her bag over her shoulder. "I have," she said as they walked to the road. "Been pretty busy, I mean. Is it my imagination? Does it seem we've run into more trouble lately?"

"Well '." Xena quickly conjectured plausible explanations. "We're headed toward a port town. Roads're usually more traveled. Rougher elements - sailors, pirates, sea-faring merchants."

"Wish they'd take a break." Gabrielle inspected her palms. "My hands're starting to look like I've been chopping trees for a season."

Xena chewed her lip, mainly to conceal a guilty grin. "Um, I'll work on your staff for ya. Smooth it up some. Not sure it'll help the calluses much."

Gabrielle chuckled. "Maybe a wooden chakram? Could use that sometimes instead of my staff."

"Heh. Might not be as accurate." Xena squinted into the distance. "Uh oh. Thick smoke to the left. Beyond that hill. Could be nothing. Had enough excitement, or wanna check it out?"

Gabrielle studied the geyser of soot. "It's not a field burning. Too concentrated. Something big though. Yeah, better see what's up."

Xena vaulted aboard Argo, pulling Gabrielle up behind her. A breakneck ride brought them close enough to see a barn on fire. A handful of warriors stood between some farmers and the blaze. Xena reined in Argo a few feet away.

"Need a hand?"

One of the warriors sauntered over. He noted Xena's weapons and warhorse. "You lookin' fer work?"

"Maybe. Whatcha got in mind?"

"Folks `round here a little stubborn about payin' their taxes. Wouldn't hurt ta have another ' collector."

"Hmmm." Xena stroked her chin. She dismounted and helped Gabrielle down. She watched the other warriors approach. "Depends. Can you use two?"

"Two?" The man snorted. "You mean her? She more than decoration?"

"Oh, absolutely. Wanna see?"

The man's face darkened. "Maybe you best get goin'. We got more important things ta take care of."

"You chicken?"

"What'd you say?"

"`Fraid to test my friend here?"

"C'mon, Snake. Don't pay her no mind."

"Yeah, place's almost burned down. Time we see if these folks're ready ta pay up."

Snake continued scowling at the strangers. Something in the dark-haired one's eyes warned him not to turn his back. He didn't like the blonde's confidence either.

"Turk, c'mere. She's `bout your age and size. When ya finish with `er, maybe she'll be your girl."

The others laughed. A young man swaggered up beside Snake.

"Sure. No sweat. Kinda cute. I'll try not ta mess up her face."

Gabrielle raised a brow at Xena. "You sure about this?"

"Piece o' cake. I got your back."

"Mm."

Gabrielle started toward Turk, twirling her staff a bit to loosen up. Turk unsheathed his sword. Gabrielle struck it from his hands in one move and sent him sprawling with her second move. The others rushed her. Xena focused on Snake and a couple others. When she'd dispatched them, she joined the farmers in cheering on Gabrielle as she polished off the rest.

"Who is she?" one of the farmers asked Xena. "She's amazing."

"Name's Gabrielle. Does this all the time. Kinda modest. Won't ask for thanks. Be sure ta give it anyway."

*****

Xena pried out the chicken leg clutched in the still fist. Pulled furs up around the motionless body. Gabrielle had been eating one minute, fallen into exhausted sleep the next. Xena doubted she'd get caught rifling through the bard's bag. The warrior took out a blank scroll. Carefully sliced off a section near the bottom. Retrieved a quill and pot of ink. Carried the items over to the fire and dropped down cross-legged. After gazing out a moment, she touched the quill tip to her tongue and began to write.

*****

"Mmmmm." Gabrielle sat up and stretched. She noted the sun's position. "Xena! Why didn't you wake me?"

Xena glanced over from heating leftovers. "Got an appointment somewhere?"

"Noooo."

"Seemed to need the rest."

"Mm." Gabrielle yawned. "Can't remember the last time I was so tired."

"How're ya feelin' now?"

Gabrielle rotated her head. "Good, actually. Wow, did I have some vivid dreams."

"Yeah?"

"Uh huh." Gabrielle languidly got up and joined the warrior. "So we're not in any hurry?"

"Nope."

"Excellent. Got some ideas brewing." Gabrielle sniffed the contents of their skillet. She grinned. "After breakfast of course."

*****

"This is weird."

Xena sat gutting the fish she'd caught while Gabrielle worked on her scroll. "What's that."

"These last few entries. I was so caught up in them, I didn't realize. They're mostly about ' me. Not that obsession nonsense. Since then."

"Yeah?" Xena smiled, pleasantly surprised. "Nothin' wrong with that."

"No '. I guess not. Except '." Gabrielle reviewed what she'd written. "Am I losing my objectivity? I mean, it's okay to have some personal stuff. It's just, I set out to chronicle your '." She cocked her head. "Hmmm. Perhaps there's another reason."

"Oh?"

"Uh huh. It's possible there's less of you because ' there's less of you." She narrowed her eyes. "In the action department. Seems I'm doing most of the work again."

"Like I said, nothing wrong with that." Xena glanced up. "I'd like to hear it."

"Hear what?"

"What you've written."

"You want me to read it to you? Now?"

"Fish won't be ready for awhile. Probably wrap it for the road anyway. I've had my run. Sharpened my sword. Don't think I have any appointments either."

Gabrielle hesitated, torn between bashfulness and anticipation. "It's still pretty raw. Kind of rambling. You sure - ."

"Gabri-ellle."

"Okay, okay."

Gabrielle got comfortable and recited her recollections of the past few days - some from what she'd written, some fleshed out in her recounting. More than the usual feelings about doing good deeds and lessons learned, she noted her "action" moments - her ever-improving physical prowess, descriptions of her fight techniques, reactions of opponents, the satisfaction of a well-placed strike. About a half hour later, she grinned sheepishly.

"Whew. More than I thought."

"I like it." Xena snorted wryly "A lot better'n mine." She winced, realizing what she'd said.

"Better than my stories about you?" Gabrielle frowned. "When did you hear them?"

"Um '. Well, I imagine '. You know, from what others say, like Minya."

Gabrielle regarded Xena suspiciously. "Sure you haven't been reading `em on the sly?" She pawed through the scrolls in her bag. "Why didn't you just ask '. Wait a minute." She unfurled a clean sheet of parchment and laid it on the ground, measuring it with her hands. "Xena!" She shook the parchment at her companion. "This is definitely shorter. You gonna tell me some squirrels did it? With their little teeth and paws? Carried a piece off for their memoirs?"

Xena ducked her head. "Gabrielle '."

"Learned your lesson, my foot! You're supposed to be so tough. Your 'delicate parts' too delicate for the average leaf? They jealous because I use the parchment to - ."

"I used it for ' writing."

"What?" Gabrielle could barely hear Xena. "For what?"

Xena gritted her teeth. "Writing."

"Writing?"

"Notes mostly."

"Notes?"

"Didn't know you were doing it too."

"Doing it 'too'? Doing what?" Gabrielle stared at Xena. "These notes? About me?"

"I wouldn't've messed with your scrolls otherwise."

"You were recording me?" Gabrielle continued staring at the silent warrior, who actually looked embarrassed. She envisioned Xena hunched over a piece of parchment in the firelight, her precise, bold letters slowly capturing her sidekick's exploits. She crawled over and rested her hand on the warrior's arm. "That is so '. I'm '. Can I see them?"

"Gabrielle, I told you. It's nothing compared to yours. Better you than me."

"Please?"

"It's '. It's not worthy of you, Gabrielle. I'd hate you to think that's what '." Xena's head dropped. "You'll be disappointed."

"Xena, simply knowing you thought about it. That you cared enough to try. How could I be disappointed?"

Doubtful blue eyes searched encouraging green ones. Xena stuck her hand into the bodice of her battledress and pulled out a folded piece of parchment. "I lost the first one. I guess during a fight. Had to start over from memory. This doesn't '."

"Read it anyway?"

Xena resignedly opened the parchment. She blew out a breath. "`Gabrielle really kicked butt the other day.'" She peered up. "When we ran into Meccenus and his boys again. After Joxer left us." She resumed reading. "`There were about a dozen opponents at the inn. Gabrielle took down four by herself, with her staff. Then we caught two robbers on the road. I '.'" She swallowed. "`I let Gabrielle take them on alone. She used her staff and some good kicks. The family was really grateful.

"`Today was the best so far. Gabrielle challenged a warlord's goon. She only needed a couple moves for him. She got about three other warriors. The farmers cheered her on. Called her amazing. Wanted to know her name. Didn't ask mine. Finally. She gathered the children around for a story. Thankfully not about me. Later we met a few ruffians intimidating some merchants. Gabrielle could've handled them but looked ready to drop, so I took care of it.'" Head bowed, Xena rested her hands in her lap. "That's it."

Gabrielle sat quietly a moment. "Not quite what I expected," she murmured. "What were you thinking?"

"It was silly, I know. Not sure what I would've done with it." Xena looked up. "Please, you mustn't believe that's all '." She pressed her lips together, afraid to make bad things worse.

"It's not silly. I meant, why?"

"You write things down that're important to you. I use a sword." Xena snorted. "Figured I'd try the quill for a change." She smiled apologetically. "Sorry about the extra calluses. Needed to give my subject matter a little boost."

Gabrielle lifted the parchment from Xena's hand. She ran her fingers across the dark strokes. "I'd never met anyone like you before. Someone bigger than life. It was so exciting." She chuckled. "Sort of like being a fly on the wall, witnessing great and wonderful things. Sure, it got to me sometimes being in your shadow, but not really so much about being noticed. I wondered how I could ever compare. Be worthy of what you'd set out to do."

"Worthy?! Gabrielle, you inspired -."

"I know that now. I don't worry anymore about being you. I know you love me for all the things that make us different. Appreciate me for who I am." Gabrielle pressed the parchment to her breast. "But realizing how much you respect me for what you do? As a warrior? Truly equal in every way?" Her eyes misted. "Who cares if I can ever run up walls or take out a whole army? Whether people chant my name? That's how you see me, Xena. That's what's important to me. Just as you say you can be a hero because you see it in my eyes."

Xena bit her lip, her heart too full for words that would ever do. She pulled Gabrielle to her and rested her chin on the gold head. "You always know what to say." She snorted softly. "Good thing one of us does."

"Hmmm. Not so sure about that. Two warriors in the family is challenging enough. Two bards? Scary."

Xena chuckled. "Think we're safe on that count." She gave Gabrielle a squeeze.

"Can I keep this?"

The warrior shrugged. "If ya want. Kinda glad to know people'll have a better version. Hope yours finds its way out there some day. Besides," she said, her eyes soft, "guess I don't really need it for myself." She placed her hand over her chest. "It's already written. Here."

Gabrielle smiled her thanks. She folded the parchment and pushed it into her top. "I kind of like it there too."

"Fish is ready to travel," Xena said scooting back over to the fire. "You up to moving out? Doing more of your hero stuff?"

Gabrielle cringed. "Um, I'm thinkin' it's time my sidekick got more action again. Couple more days as the main deal, I'll be sleeping on my feet."

"You got it." Xena's mouth puckered. "Doesn't change I'm still not lettin' those idiots ignore you."

"Yes, O Obsessive One. Try not to hurt any of `em, okay?" Gabrielle got up and hobbled around the camp. "See this black eye?" she croaked out. "Got it from the Warrior Princess. Uh huh. Whacked me `cause I didn't say 'thank you' fast enough to that adorable tagalong of hers. Um, you know '. What's `er name. Mavis?"

Cheeks sucked in, Xena uncurled to her feet. "Seems you're not the only one around here being underappreciated."

Gabrielle blinked. "Oh? How so?"

"I have many skills. Why do they always involve whacking somebody?"

"Um, well, I didn't mean -."

"What about my creativity? So I stink at barding." Xena crouched, picked up a twig and scratched in the dirt a stick figure in a sports bra and skirt, holding a staff. "I could make posters of you. Tack `em up around town. Maybe write, 'Hail Gabrielle! She deserves your thanks.'" She tossed her hair Gabrielle's way. "Or my persuasiveness." She sauntered over to a rock, sat on it and pretended to distribute items on an invisible table.

"Hi," she greeted an imaginary guest. "Step right up. I've started a club for Gabrielle. Dedicated to how she's the woman behind Xena's much more acclaimed and rather inflated reputation. Aren't ya just dyin' ta have a memento of this unsung hero?" She gestured toward her "table." "A sketch perhaps? Signed scroll? Some threads from that gorgeous swatch of material she wears up top? Guaranteed to have her scent, by the way. Or maybe you'd prefer -."

"Xena?"

"Yes, O Underappreciated One?"

"My mistake. How `bout I agree you're multi-dimensionally talented."

"That's a good start."

"And whacking people is an excellent technique. Far superior to many others you might consider on my behalf."

"Good conclusion." Xena grinned. "See, I can negotiate when I'm moved."

Gabrielle rolled her tongue in her cheek. "Yeah, well, I think it's time we both moved on. If, of course, you're finished with your ' customers?"

"My custom '. Oh." Grinning, Xena got up, bowed to the air, and walked over to gather her things. "Yeah. They gotta go anyway. Don't wanna miss the exhibit I planned for `em."

"Do I dare ask of what?"

"Your clothing, silly. How your different garb reflects your development. From a simple peasant girl to '." Xena gave Gabrielle's current ensemble the once over. "To ' um ' who you are now," she finished smugly.

The word "insufferable" tempted Gabrielle's tongue. She reminded herself which one of them was supposed to prefer the high road. "Why, thank you, Xena," she responded sweetly. "How typical of you. Your powers of observation know no bounds." Flashing a superior smile, she began packing her bag.

The two broke camp without conversation, occasionally shaking their heads in long-suffering amusement at the goofiness they had to put up with in each other. Soon they and Argo headed out.

"All in all, seems Aphrodite accidentally did some good," Gabrielle observed as she walked beside Xena. "You resolved your guilt about Lyceus. I got out my 'teensy' resentments about being sidekick."

"Uh huh. Joxer got to be a true primate." Xena's shoulders began shaking. "Not to mention up under your intimate apparel."

"Xeenaa!" Laughing, Gabrielle swatted the warrior's arm. "I was saving that gown for a special occasion. Certainly not covering Joxer's intimates while he swung through trees eating worms." She shuddered. "Gotta remind myself there're more troublesome things we could've been obsessed with." Her mind drifted back to a mural in Aphrodite's temple. "Like those ' love ' positions I still can't believe humanly possible," she said to herself.

"Those what?"

"Uh, nothing." Gabrielle shook her head clear of the rather intriguing images that kept popping up in her dreams. "You know, since we're on this 'celebrate Gabrielle' kick, maybe something else good came out of Aphrodite's spell."

"Hey, if it's about patting you on the back, I'm in."

"Great. I've been wanting to work on different forms of barding. Might've fit in well with your idea about a club." Eyes twinkling, Gabrielle cleared her throat. She launched into a hearty rendition of her recently composed song. "Well, listen to my story about Gabrielle/Cute little gal that's lookin' really swell/Perfect hair, such a lovely lass/Nice round breasts and a firm young -."

"Gabri-ellle?!"

"Too inappropriate for the non-adult audience?"

"And you accuse me of pushing the limits? Humph. I'd say that's one way an Amazon Queen definitely beats a Warrior Princess."

"Wow." Gabrielle tilted her head thoughtfully. "You mean, perhaps it wasn't just the enchantment? Could it be true? I really am flawless?"

Xena raised an incredulous brow. "You are an amazement, that's for sure. Maybe just as well the world doesn't know how amazing."

*****

"What's that?"

The man dusted off a piece of parchment he'd found by the road. "Not sure. Got some scribbles on it." He shoved it at his wife. "You know, I don't ' see ' so good."

"Right." The woman snorted softly. She scanned the parchment. "Hmm. May be part of a story. About a warrior named Gabrielle. Mentions Xena too."

"The Warrior Princess?"

"Seems so."

"Guy at the inn said she came through a few days ago. Said she got some cute peasant girl taggin' along."

"Not according to this. Writer's tired of hearing 'Xena, Xena, Xena.' Goes on about how well this Gabrielle fights. Why she's behind Xena's good reputation, her success on her new path. Claims Gabrielle's the real hero but people don't always see it."

"Might be one of those fanciful bards, don't know what he's talkin' `bout."

The woman shrugged. "Details sound like the writer's pretty acquainted with them. Listen to this: 'The only reason Xena does any good at all in this world is because she does it with Gabrielle. Gabrielle makes an important contribution every day. Xena promised Gabrielle she would make sure people know that from now on.'"

"Like I said, mush ta me. Wished I'd seen Xena in action. S'posed ta be amazing."

The woman cut her eyes at her husband. "Writer seems to think Gabrielle's amazing." She fingered the parchment thoughtfully. "Believe I'll hold on to this. Could be important. Maybe this bard meant to set the record straight. Spread the word the 'sidekick's' due her share of credit too." She smiled to herself. "Who knows? Maybe it'll start with me."

THE END

2 notes · View notes

superbpoetrytheorist01 · 6 months

Text

AT THIS POINT! And I really mean pay attention to exactly that sentence.

THEY HAVE TO BE LYING ABOUT NOT WANTING TO BE CALLED F.

THERE'S SO MUCH PROOF!

They keep telling me not to say it, going back and forth like it's even possible for a sophisticante to ARGUE with a piddle spirit lil RETARD. Like bitch, I'm better than you AND I have better things to do.

They started off this morning after some interacting, with randomly calling me a w word. Like bitch. I'm like: Like, bitch? I don't say that but somehow it's conveyed (I hope lol or else how do they say the next thing...)

BITCH. GUESS WHAT THE F WORDS SAY!!!

"Well you keep calling us faggots!"

On the inside I'm like:

THE BITCHES ARE STILL LYING ABOUT WHO HAS THE UPPER HAND IN THE CONVERSATION.

My incompetent, good for nothing but jacking it, can never come up with money or offers, thinks I'm amazing and wonderful, STALKERS.

[TURNS OUT:]

Like Young Enrique A.K.A. Jack Harlow was saying, the boys in the back waiting on the next track, [WHEW!] Sweatin' ya boy, HAWKING ya boy, [WHEW!] NEEDING IT FROM YA BOY!

Bitch, they were waiting on me to listen to music online so they could hack or something they talm bout on Flo Milli's ( ... ) Yes. Flo fucking milli.

On roaring 20's they talm bout some "All of my bitches got r*p*d!" And then when I go back to it it sounds different and different then the actual lyric. Fuckin aretards.

[They ain't said shit with "MAD AT ME." (((DOE)))

DAT WAY (((CLICK!)))

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my-chaos-radio · 1 year

Text

youtube

Release: May 28, 1990

Lyrics:

You can't touch this

My, my, my, my

(You can't touch this)

Music hits me so hard

Makes me say "Oh, my Lord

Thank you for blessing me

With a mind to rhyme and two hyped feet"

It feels good when you know you're down

A super dope homeboy from the Oaktown

And I'm known as such

And this is a beat, uh, you can't touch

I told you, homeboy

You can't touch this

Yeah, that's how we livin', and ya know

You can't touch this

Look in my eyes, man

You can't touch this

Yo, let me bust the funky Iyrics

You can't touch this

Fresh new kicks and pants

You got it like that

Now you know you wanna dance

So, move outta your seat

And get a fly girl

And catch this beat

While it's rolling

Hold on

Pump a little bit and let 'em know it's going on

Like that, like that

Cold on a mission, so fall on back

Let 'em know that you're too much

And this is a beat, uh, they can't touch

Yo, I told you

You can't touch this

Why you standing there, man?

You can't touch this

Yo, sound the bell, school's in, sucker

You can't touch this

Give me a song or rhythm

Making them sweat, that's what I'm giving them

Now, they know

You talk about the Hammer

When you're talkin 'bout a show

That's hyped and tight

Singers are sweatin'

So pass them a wipe or a tape

To learn

What it's gonna take in the 90's to burn

The chart's legit

Either work hard or you might as well quit

Stop, Hammer time!

That's word, because, you know

You can't touch this

Break it down!

"Go with the flow", it is said

If you can't groove to this, then you probably are dead

So, wave your hands in the air

Bust a few moves

Run your fingers through your hair

This is it, for a winner

Dance to this and you're gonna get thinner

Now move, slide your rump

Just for a minute, let's all do the bump

(Bump, bump, bump)

Yeah

You can't touch this

Look, man

You can't touch this

Stop, Hammer time!

You'll probably get hyped, boy, 'cause you know you can't

You can't touch this

Ring the bell, school's back in

Break it down!

Stop, Hammer time!

You can't touch this

Break it down!

Every time you see me

That Hammer's just so hype

I'm dope on the floor

And I'm magic on the mic

Now, why would I ever

Stop doing this

With others making records

That just don't hit?

I toured around the world

From London to The Bay

It's "Hammer! Go, Hammer! MC Hammer! Yo, Hammer!"

And the rest can go and play

"U Can't Touch This"

You can't touch this

Yeah

You can't touch this

Songwriter:

I told you

You can't touch this

Too hype, you can't touch this

Yo, we're outta here

You can't touch this

Rick James / Stanley Kirk Burrell / Mc Hammer / Alonzo H. Miller

SongFact:

The song is the first single from his third studio album 'Please Hammer, Don't Hurt 'Em'.

Above all, MC Hammer praises himself and his music. He makes it clear that no one else can get close to him or "can match him". He thanks God for his talent and asks the listeners to dance.

MC Hammer produced the song themselves and used a sample of the riff from Rick James' 1981 song 'Super Freak' for the catchy tune.

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frankieking · 1 year

Text

I posted 595 times in 2022

That's 595 more posts than 2021!

79 posts created (13%)

516 posts reblogged (87%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@august-atwood

@penned-cbarbosa

@raj-veerapen

@emmie-fitzgerald

@amaya-veerapen

I tagged 585 of my posts in 2022

Only 2% of my posts had no tags

#text: august - 109 posts

#chat: celeste - 51 posts

#text: celeste - 39 posts

#chat: raj - 33 posts

#chat: emmie - 31 posts

#text: raj - 29 posts

#chat: thomas - 27 posts

#text: amaya - 23 posts

#chat: august - 21 posts

#online: emmie - 19 posts

Longest Tag: 81 characters

#not me reblogging myself lmao but also frankie is slowly having a change of heart

My Top Posts in 2022:

“It’s my liiiifeeee and it’s now or neverrrr!!!” Frankie sang from the top of their lungs, swaying and dancing around to Bon Jovi, giggling with their dance partner. “Oh my God, my spleen hurts. I need water. Ok, okay. Water break! Are you coming? Come on ya party animal!”

32 notes - Posted July 22, 2022

Text: Thomas

Frankie: Raj is trying to set me up and I think I'm sweatin'! Boy, I'm sweatin'!

34 notes - Posted July 9, 2022

“Thank you so much for coming!! Are you having fun? Have you gone on the rides yet?”

52 notes - Posted September 2, 2022

“I mean it’s great to see so many happy people, you know?” They tore up a blade of grass as they went on. “I just don’t think they’ll be bringing in another cast member this late in the game. It’s cool. I get to be like the spectator or something.”

72 notes - Posted May 9, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Text: August

Frankie: (thinking they're texting Amaya) I THINK AUGUST ALMOST KISSED ME. WAIT NO, I'M PRETTY SURE THEY ALMOST DID AND IT WAS THE BEST THING EVER AND NOW I HAVE TO LOOK EXTRA PERFECT TONIGHT SO PLEASE COME OVER SO WE CAN SCREAM AND LISTEN TO MARINA WHILE WE DO IT. I JUST MET THEM BUT I REALLY LIKE THEM LIKE THEY FEEL SO FAMILIAR TO ME? YOUR DAD SHOULD BE A MATCH MAKER, OKURRR?

Frankie: Oh crap.

146 notes - Posted July 22, 2022

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#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review

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spicytrashthe1st · 3 years

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Obey me boys w a milking schedule

Lucifer

We all know home boys works 24/7 and is stressed 24/7. You know what we dont like? (I mean its kinda hot when he snaps n goes full feral but like we're just gonna forget that for a sec k) A stressed Luci, he snaps at every one n is just a down right asshole. So the guys needs a milkin schedule to keep him from murdering everyone.

He's hesitant at first bc hes lucifer. But after a week of you comin on by once a day to completely empty his balls he starts to come around.

Mammon

It doesnt matter where u is Mam's, if u didnt want to be milked at the Casino then u shoulda been home on time.

Does he stay out late on purpose? Sometime. Most of the time hes on a winning streak n forgets. So when he see u at first hes his happy blabby self, but then he sees that look in ur eye n stops for a moment. He starts to flush, his body doin a full body tingle as he realises what time it is. U smile at him sweetly, he tries to convince u to leave or go somewhere more private but ur havin none of that. U coo at him, tell him to keep goin, he cant lose his winning streak after all. So he turns his attention back to the table, he tries to relax but the feelin of u pressed up against him has his nerves shot. Hes able to play through his first orgasm as well as his second. The third has him sweatin n from there he starts to cling to u, graspin a ur arm w such desperation that its hard not to coo praises at him. U might have to carry him home. But who doesnt want to carry home a doe eyed Mammon.

Leviathan

This dude has a 100% chance of passin out after a milkin. So if hes awake past his bedtime then you'll slam open his door, he squeals eveytime, and head straight towards him. Cold blooded, you turn off his pc. U rip him out of his chair n throw him onto that sofa beanbag thingy he has beside his bathtub. Fuck those pants, theyes in the way, yank em. He covers his face w the back of his hand, his cocks already so slick that u dont need any lube. His body knows what gonna happen. He twitches n squirms the entire time, but he always gets a goodnight sleep.

Satan

Rolls his eyes when he sees u approaching. How dare u interupt his reading, so inconvenient. The sweet boy tries focus on his book he cant stop himself from screwing his eyes shut. Thus the book lands onto the floor w a thump as he bucks in ur hold.

Asmodeus

Loves it. Starts to wear watches bc of it. Brags about it to anyone who has ears.

Beelzebub

Do ya think beel eats his own cum 🤔

Just imagine milkin him for all hes worth n then cooin at him while his in a dazed state to drinkin up.

Belphegor

Ya know how sometimes u forget whether uv fed ur cat or not. Yeah, its like that but its "have i milked belphie today?". By the way he humps u durin his sleep i dont think he minds.

Diavolo

Like this dude needs anymore distractions. But like, what if it wasnt a distraction? What if it was a way of inciting him to work?

Just imagine, u come into his office 10mins before its milkin time. U sit on the couch and watch him sweat under the collar as u wait for the time to go by. He tries to not look up, tries to not get distracted by ur presence but he could feel ur eyes on him from a mile away. He whines, lookin up at u w pleadin eyes. U remind him that he wont get anythin if he doesnt finish his work. So he rushes through his paperwork n when hes done he practically rips off his pants before jumpin onto his desk, legs spread waitin for u.

Barbatos

Tries to wave u off bc hes busy but melts as soon as ur hands are on him. Just nuzzling at his neck has him pushin back into u. Take it slow w him, nice n slow, he aint goin anywhere. Hearin this dude whine for more, ugh, wish i had audio for that cause damn he begs so pretty. Oh n when his legs buckle makin him go rag doll in ur arms *chef kiss*.

Remember to clean up after lest u want the face of disapproval.

Simeon

Patience is a virtue...that Simeon does not have as it turns out. He wants is all n he wants it now. Simeon honey its been 3 hours, maybe its time to stop? Pft, nah. Home boy just takes himself into his own hands or humps a pillow until he passes out, even then he keeps goin.

Solomon

Laughs u off but welcomes u all the same. He keeps him composure for an commendable time, but he breaks all the same. One time u got him to blow up the lights, never lettin him live that down.

#obey me brain rot #obey me #obey me swd #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan #obey me satan #obey me asmodeus #obey me Beelzebub #obey me belphegor #obey me diavolo #obey me barbatos #obey me simeon #obey me solomon

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imo-chan-imagines · 3 years

Text

Quickie | Haikyuu!! Drabble

Kuroo × fem!reader

Warnings: 18+, some juicy smut, like damn boi I'm sweatin' 🥵, quickie, raw sex, public sex, in the locker room lol, risky biznass if ya know what I mean, against a wall, wearing clothes, creampie, a drizzle of a cum kink, and a bit of a size kink, swearing, drabble

A/N: I've been catching up on season 4, and booii 🙌 Kuroo can fuck my pussy any minute of the dayyy 🤤 Hence this filthy, little piece you see before you. As always, drabbles aren't as edited as my regs. Oops. Anywho~ enjoy! 😘

⚠️ 18+ CONTENT! MINORS: PLEASE DO NOT INTERACT ⚠️

You let out a gasp as Kuroo presses you up against the tiles of the locker room wall, the cold stealing the heat from your back and the breath from your lungs. Your skirt's hiked up around your stoamch as your feet dangle in the air, his hips snapping up into you at a rapid pace.

You bite down on your lip as you're repeatedly filled by his cock, over and over, the walls of your pussy gripping him tightly, sucking him back in, not wanting him to leave.

It's too much. It's overwhelming. The speed, the depth, the danger – you're practically cumming around him already.

The red fabric stretched over width of his chest blocks out your view, making you feel small and insignificant as you cling to his neck. His volleyball shorts are barely pulled down enough. And the pure white of your moist panties was hastily pushed aside to make way for his throbbing cock.

That's how desperate he is right now. That's how much he's craving the warm, velvety feel of your pussy melting around him.

The muscles in his arms flex as he shifts his grip, holding up your legs. Supporting you entirely. Pinning you in place. You're unable to move as he curls the axis hips even deeper, greedily pounding into you.

"Oh fuck, baby," he whispers, the grin on his lips faltering for a moment.

He leans down and presses his forehead against yours. His face is flushed, his eyes shut. A single bead of sweat drips from the pulsing vein along his temple.

He's so close. You can feel the heat of his length twitching and pulsing inside you.

The underwire of your dislodged bra presses uncomfortably into your breast with each jolt through your body, Kuroo's skin slapping against yours with each insatiable thrust.

Any one on the guys on the team could walk in at any moment and find you, being fucked so brazenly up against the wall by your horny boyfriend – their horny captain – who couldn't keep it in his pants until after the game.

And that's what has your pussy fluttering around his cock, teetering on the edge, as the swollen tip, leaking streams of precum, presses into that perfect, sensitive spot – over, and over, and over. He knows you love the danger just as much as he does.

"Ahh – fuck...fuck – fuck!" he curses under his breath, the slopping sound of his cock pistoning into your mixed juices starting to fill the empty room.

"Te-Testu..." you stutter, your fingers running up the back of his neck and through the messy tufts of dark hair.

He's familiar with the sound, the sensation. Too familiar.

His eyes flicker open, and are met by the glorious sight of your fucked-out expression, just as the crest of your orgasm lurches through you, sending your pussy spasming around him. Your thighs quiver uncontrollably in his grip, a lewd, delirious moan resembling his name humming on your lips.

"That's right, baby. Cum on my fucking cock," he hisses, just before reaching his own climax, spurting ropes of thick cum deep inside you with a low groan in your ear that sends a shiver prickling up your arching spine.

The moment passes, and you're a heap on the floor while he's already springing to his feet, re-energised and hoisting the loose fabric of his shorts back up around his hips.

"Sit in the stands just like that – okay, baby?" he says sweetly. "Just for me."

You nod, letting him drag you to your unsteady feet, even though you know it's going to leak out onto the bench like last time, and the time before. And the time for that.

He helps you straighten your clothes before stroking his thumb across your cheek and planting a kiss on your nose.

"There's a good girl," he grins. "You know how much better I play knowing you're out there, cheering me on, with your pretty, little pussy full of my cum."

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underkita-archive · 3 years

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polyester

kita shinsuke | w.c 2k

a/n: sigh pain,, this is inspired by the song heather by conan gray! i was walking my dog when the song came on and i was like huh, what if i just write a leetle something? which became u know,, 2k words,,,, anyway uh note that this not really an x reader fic,,,

now with the companion piece cotton

set post-timeskip

warnings: just sad, poor use of past tense honestly i struggled so hard, unrequited feelings/love, some tears being shed, feelings of regret

On the second day of your first year of high school you meet Kita Shinsuke.

Quiet, collected, Kita Shinsuke.

It had been completely by luck of the draw. You could remember your nerves, still afraid of navigating the ins and outs of high school when there was a gentle tap on your shoulder in the first year hallway.

“You dropped this.” He’d placed the notebook in your hands before you could stutter out a thank you, left to watch as he approached the Miya twins with a stern look.

To call it love at first sight may have been an exaggeration, but at the time you couldn’t help but color it as such.

His cool demeanor and dedication to a sport that hardly rewarded him was far more admirable than you would’ve liked to admit. So you had found yourself at few more volleyball matches than someone who never cared for the sport.

And when Miya Atsumu came careening into the classroom one frigid morning spouting nonsense and demanding one of the girls in your class volunteer to be the volleyball club’s team manager you couldn’t have stopped yourself from raising your hand if you tried.

He wasn’t even captain yet, but the two of you worked closely. Staying behind to clean up after the raucous first years, careless second years and overworked third years.

The only ones dedicated enough.

Somewhere in between those late nights cleaning and those early mornings prepping, between the quiet whispers and watching him become more and more dependable.

You had fallen in love.

It hadn’t surprised you, you knew you were doomed from the start. Since that one lucky day in the first year hallway, you knew it had been a matter of when not if.

There had been more than enough opportunities to confess your feelings, to free yourself of the endless nights of pining, of being tormented by all the what ifs and almosts.

Yet you watched in perfect silence as your first year melted away. Watched as Kita earned the right to being called captain, and let yourself be consumed by the role of the doting team manager.

Once again you had found yourself letting the months roll by, allowing your feelings to rot away at your insides, suffering in the way he seemed to form a kind smile solely for you, living for the quiet praise and approving nods he’d occasionally offer.

“Why don’t you just confess?” Your friend had said, tired of the sad way you would carry yourself after a particularly taxing day of spending too much time in Kita’s proximity.

“Nationals, I’ll tell him when we win nationals.” You promised, trying to convince yourself that it would be the right time, a poor attempt at trying to conjure up a speck of bravery.

By the time Nationals had arrived you had prepared your heart to the best of your ability, ready to see your team take their rightful spot as the champions.

And when they didn’t, whatever courage you had cobbled together shattered. So you sulked. Standing on the balcony of the hotel, staring up at the light polluted Tokyo sky, shaking from the biting cold.

“You’ll get sick like that.” You hadn’t thought your blood could run any colder until his voice interrupted whatever pitiful thoughts had been running through your mind.

“I-It’s...fine.” You hoped he chalked down the stammer in your words from the weather over nerves.

“Mmm. Don’t stay out here too long.” You nodded your head, keeping your eyes focused on a flickering star struggling to make its presence known when there was a weight on your shoulders. You couldn’t help but snap your eyes down, the familiar shade of maroon now hanging over your body.

And what should’ve finally been said that night was left in the air, left struggling like that little star in the sky.

With a heavy heart you watched him graduate, watched as time kept moving without bothering to let you catch up.

◇ ◆ ◇

Years later you can say with confidence that your school girl crush has aptly faded, telling yourself that there was never a need to confess.

Until your phone beeps late one Thursday night.

Engagement dinner.

Your eyes scan over the text, once, twice, again and again until you lose count, until your chest feels tight and your face burns and what were once feelings you thought had faded start rearing their ugly head.

You won’t allow whatever leftover hormonal thoughts poke and prod at what you’ve built up. You’re older, wiser and most importantly you’ve moved on.

So you clean up nicely, put on something nice but not too nice, just a touch of perfume and only check twice in the mirror before you walk out the door to call a Lyft.

The restaurant is unfamiliar, nestled in a cute little neighborhood. It’s fitting for Kita, it’s homey and cozy but nice enough for the occasion.

You try not to choke as he approaches you, a grin too large splaying across his usually serious face, oddly enough it fits, furthermore it hurts.

It takes you a second too long to notice the woman beside him, the sight of his arm tucked behind her back as she curls into his side, she offers you a shy yet refined smile. You barely catch her name, the overwhelming sensation of the past creeping up on you, tearing down whatever walls you had carefully built over the years.

They show you to the table, Aran, Akagi and Gin already there with their charming and familiar smiles, yet the lovely reunion is unable to distract you from the way he pulls out her chair, making sure she’s properly settled before he takes his place beside her once more.

You think of the maroon jacket that had weighed so comfortably on your shoulders that freezing Tokyo night, you think of the words that laid on the tip of your tongue, so close yet so far as Kita patted your head and returned back inside.

The lost opportunity.

Only to have the once sweet memory dashed away at the lightness of your left ring finger, as you’re forced to witness the woman beside Kita rest a perfectly manicured hand atop his, the ruby gemstone set on a golden band gleaming so beautifully in the low restaurant lighting.

“Captain! Sorry we’re late! Congratulations.” Miya Atsumu with his usual loudmouth tears through your concealed pity party, a small smile finding its way to your lips at the way Osamu trudges behind him with that special irritated look reserved solely for his brother.

“It’s just Kita, I haven’t been your captain in years.” He rises from his seat, taking his bride-to-be’s hand and introducing her to the ever famous Miya twins.

“Sure sure, manager-chan! Looking good!” He’s by your side in seconds, thick arms already pulling you into a bone crushing hug.

“You’re gonna break her ‘Tsumu.”

“Shut it ‘Samu, I would never.” His hold only tightens at the statement, the rippling of his muscles against your body causing an undeniable rush of heat to bloom across your body.

“Enough of that.” You laugh, wiggling out of his grip with an exasperated laugh.

A few more former players of Inarizaki pour into the restaurant, old memories tossed around with endearing fondness and one too many congratulatory toasts leaves your heart aching worse than before, regret eating away at you, the inevitable question of what if cycling though your thoughts.

“Doing okay?” Atsumu’s closeness is nothing new, somewhere over the years your boundaries had skewed, his face being a little too close was to be expected at this point.

“Sure.” It’s a noncommittal reply that Atsumu would normally call you out on, but he accepts it only after letting his gaze linger on you for a moment.

The minutes tick by as Kita retells the picturesque proposal he had carefully planned, unfiltered adoration and fondness adorning his eyes.

Lovestruck.

An expression you had wished this man to have focused on you just a few years ago.

What if?

The question taunts you, what if you hadn’t been a coward? What if you had said it that night? Or any other moment spent by his side? Would it be you?

Another sip of the bitter wine offers no reprieve from the taunting thoughts, whatever mask you had been donning the entirety of the night starts to wear down, you can feel it slipping out of place.

“Boy am I sweatin’!” Atsumu barks out, knocking his shoulder against yours, true enough his cheeks are tinted a soft blush, eyes glossy from one too many beers.

The exclamation causes a few snorts and chuckles around the table, a scathing comment from Osamu and a faux jeer from Suna.

“Maybe you need a walk.” You mumble, picking at the food you had long abandoned earlier in the meal.

“Ya know what? You might be onto somethin’, let’s go.” His fingers are around your wrist before you can register what he’s saying.

“Atsumu what?”

“C’mon, say bye!”

“Atsumu!”

“You be safe, thank you for coming.” Your head spins as Kita offers that same smile, still a little too wide as he offers a nod and turns back to his fiancee. Atsumu tugs at you again, only for you to shake him off, turning properly to the happy couple.

“Congratulations Kita-san. I wish you both,” You swallow the bitter lump in your throat, “I wish you both unending happiness.”

You’re turning on your heel before you can receive a reply, biting back whatever pent up emotions threaten to spill over as you rush out of the restaurant, practically running down the sidewalk fueled by the desperate need to get as far as you possibly can.

“Hey hey slow down!” You don’t bother slowing, let alone stopping, knowing fully well the professional athlete chasing after you will catch up in a matter of seconds. “I said slow down.”

The second his hand touches your shoulder whatever walls left standing come crumbling down.

“It hurts.” It’s nothing more than a whisper before he’s turning you around to face him, a hand still planted on your shoulder as the tears that have been welled up for nearly five years begin to fall. The tears you hadn’t allowed yourself to shed.

“I know.” His voice is pained as he draws you closer, letting you close the distance as you lean against him. The trail of tears burns against your cheeks, they’re filled with shame, with unspoken words, with unrequited love.

It’s almost poetic, the way you two stand there in a broken silence under the flickering light of one of the odd stores dotting the street. It feels like hours pass by, the initial ache in your chest starting to lessen as you meet his gaze.

“Could you... consider me?” There’s something profoundly sad in his eyes, an exhaustion from years spent quietly resigned from confessing a truth that you were all too familiar with dotting his expression.

“I,” can’t, “don’t know.”

“I know that I’m not him, I don’t think I can be anything close, but just, do you think you could?” There isn’t the slightest trace of his boyish charm nor the cool demeanor he normally holds in serious situations. He feels smaller, more exposed and for the first time in all your years of knowing him.

You can see weakness.

“I can’t make any promises.” It feels almost too soon, a little rushed for you to be able to make sense of anything that’s transpired, you don’t want to hurt him, you don’t want to lead him on.

“I can wait,” a wistful quirk of his lips rekindles the ache from before as an expression you’ve surely worn in the past washes over his face, “I’ve gotten pretty good at it.”

And in a matter of two, maybe three seconds, the world seems to tilt, just a few degrees, just enough for the angle to change, for that memory of the muddled Tokyo sky to shift a few inches to the right from the struggling star to the one shining in softly in the distance.

Your hand moves before you can even think, fingers curling around Atsumu’s chilled ones, intertwining them carefully as you offer him something akin to understanding, something a little deeper, not quite sure what you’re truly conveying.

“Just for a little bit longer.”

#miki writes #sad miki #angst #under.kita #inarizaki #i honestly hurt my own damn self w this #honestly maybe it's not that bad and i'm just sensitive?#idk i just #this was v therapeutic to write #i've been hating writing as of late and this just #idk it made me write #and i liked that?#there's going to be a companion piece to this at some point #idk when #but yeah phew #sorry for my sins

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