#SASS ATTACK | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

killerandhealerqueen · 8 months

Note

A prompt that Zhan Zhao is having a panic attack and Bai Yutong calm him down

Oh...I'm listening anon, I'm listening...

Zhan Yao liked to consider himself a man in control of emotions. That’s not to say that he didn’t sometimes have instances where he let his emotions get the best of him (he was human after all). But for the most part, he liked to think that he didn’t let his emotions override his ability to do his job. Until one day, when he was sitting in his office at S.C.I., an email came in, causing him to look at his computer in surprise before he headed to his inbox to look at it. It wasn’t rare for him to get emails, as he was a professor, so he had students emailing him all the time at all odd hours. He also worked with the Psychology Department every now and then when they needed assistance, so maybe it was an email from one of them with a question (because no one liked to make the trip all the way from one side of the department to the other where S.C.I. was located). However, when he clicked on the email, instead of getting a simple message or a question, like he was expecting, multiple pictures of very gory images began filling his desktop until there wasn’t a single piece of his desktop that didn’t have a horrifying image on it.

‘What is this?!’ he exclaimed, staring at his desktop with wide eyes before he shook himself out of it and began looking at the images, trying to decipher what was on them. As he looked at them, realization slowly dawned on him that each bloody image was that of what looked like to be a mutilated human body. He of course couldn’t tell their gender or age, but it really didn’t seem to matter because every picture seemed to be that of a different body…and some of them, he realized, looked like they belonged to children.

“Oh my God” he whispered, staring at the images in horror. He then quickly began to search for a way to get rid of the photos, to clear his desktop, and his mind, of the horror he had just seen, but there was no way to get rid of them.

“God damn it” he hissed, just as there was a knock at his door, making him look up with wide eyes before he quickly grabbed the power cord and yanked it, the computer screen immediately going black just as Bai Yutong poked his head in.

“Hey—” he started when he paused, frowning at Zhan Yao’s paler than normal complexion and wide eyes.

“Cat, you okay?” he asked. Zhan Yao looked at him before he nodded.

“Yeah. Yeah, I’m fine” he assured, making Bai Yutong hum as he stepped into the office and closed the door behind him before he walked over and sat down on the edge of his desk.

“Are you sure? Because you look like you’ve seen a ghost” he stated. Zhan Yao gave him a look before he shut his eyes and took a deep breath, only for the horrific images to flash behind his eyes, making him flinch and quickly open his eyes before he looked at Bai Yutong again.

“Mouse, you know I don’t believe in ghosts” he reminded. Bai Yutong huffed.

“Just because you don’t believe in them doesn’t mean you couldn’t have seen one” he stated. Zhan Yao tsked.

“Now you’re just being illogical” he murmured before he looked at him.

“Did you need something?” he asked. Bai Yutong chuckled softly.

“Yeah. I need you to get up out of your seat; it’s time to go home” he replied. Zhan Yao blinked before he looked down at his watch, his eyes widening in surprise to find that it was quite late. How had he let time slip away from him? He then looked up at Bai Yutong and nodded.

“O-Oh. Okay” he agreed before he began packing up, Bai Yutong frowning at him.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” he asked. Zhan Yao nodded.

“Yeah, just tired” he replied. Bai Yutong hummed.

“I get that” he agreed before he pushed himself off of Zhan Yao’s desk and walked over to the door of the office, waiting for Zhan Yao before they both headed out of the office, heading home.

~*~*~*~*~*~

As they headed home, Zhan Yao’s phone buzzed, making him look at it to see that he had an email. He stared at the notification for a moment, hoping that it would just be a normal email, before he swiped it open, only for more gruesome photos to suddenly start crowding his screen.

“Shit” he hissed before he quickly locked his phone, making Bai Yutong look over at him with a raised eyebrow.

“Everything okay?” he asked. Zhan Yao looked back at him and nodded.

“Yeah” he answered. Bai Yutong hummed.

“Bad email?” he inquired. Zhan Yao’s eyes widened slightly before he shook his head.

�� “No, no, I just uh…forgot that I had to do something when I get home. It completely slipped my mind” he stated. Bai Yutong hummed and nodded slowly, not saying anymore as Zhan Yao looked down at his phone with narrowed eyes.

~*~*~*~*~*~

Later that night, after dinner, a shower, and some last-minute work, Zhan Yao and Bai Yutong were lying in bed, Bai Yutong fast asleep while Zhan Yao laid there…wide awake. It’s not like he didn’t want to sleep…he just couldn’t. Anytime he closed to his eyes, all he could see were the bloody pictures coming out at him from the darkness, causing him to startle out of his sleep every damn time. He then let out a heavy sigh; looks like he wasn’t getting any sleep tonight.

~*~*~*~*~*~

The next morning, as they were heading to work, Bai Yutong looked over at Zhan Yao and frowned.

“Zhan Yao, are you okay? You look tired” he stated, making Zhan Yao huff internally; he didn’t know the fucking half of it. He then looked over at him and nodded.

“I’m fine. Just…didn’t sleep well last night. Too much on my mind” he explained. Bai Yutong frowned.

“You want me to turn around? Tell the others you’re taking a day off?” he asked. Zhan Yao shook his head.

“No…I’ll be fine. I’m just going to shut my eyes for a bit. Wake me when we get there?” he replied. Bai Yutong hummed, and Zhan Yao smiled slightly before he shut his eyes, allowing himself to relax in the moving car.

~*~*~*~*~*~

When they arrived at the department, Bai Yutong parked the car before he looked over at Zhan Yao, noting how haggard he looked, and sighed softly before he reached out and gently gave his shoulder a shake.

“Zhan Yao” he called out. At his name, Zhan Yao all but bolted awake, his eyes wide like a startled prey animal, before he let out a sharp breath and looked over at Bai Yutong, who was looking back at him with wide eyes.

“Oh. Thank you” he thanked before he quickly unbuckled his belt and got out of the car, grabbing his briefcase on the way before he slammed the door shut, Bai Yutong staring at him with wide eyes before he also got out of the car and rushed after him.

“Cat!” he called out, making Zhan Yao pause and glance over at him and rushed over to his side and looked at him.

“Are you okay? Like, really?” he asked. Zhan Yao smiled and nodded.

“I’m fine, Mouse. Really” he assured. Bai Yutong hummed, as if he didn’t believe him, but didn’t say anything as they continued into the Hong Kong Police Department and up to S.C.I.

~*~*~*~*~*~

When they reached their department, they headed to their respective offices, Zhan Yao shutting his door before he eyed his desktop nervously; would the pictures be there when he plugged it back in? He hoped not. He then hesitantly walked over to his desk and placed his briefcase down before he plugged his computer back in and waited, watching as the computer booted itself up before it showed him his log-in screen, causing him to holding his breath as he typed in his password before he pressed “enter”, expecting the worse. Thankfully, his desktop seemed normal, causing him to let out a soft breath of relief before he headed to his inbox to check the emails that came in overnight. As he was checking his inbox and replying to emails, he didn’t notice that a new one came in until he absentmindedly clicked on it, only for more gory photos to suddenly flood his desktop, making him violently flinch and cover his eyes before he quickly reached out and yanked out the plug again, letting out a sharp huff.

“God damn it” he hissed.

~*~*~*~*~*~

After getting the horribly violent email, Zhan Yao refused to check his email and instead just decided to work on paperwork and grading his students papers because that didn’t require him to touch his fucking computer, which he was pretty sure he was going to have to send to IT if he had to keep force shutting it down by unplugging it every time. And every time his phone buzzed, he visibly jumped and glanced over at it with wide eyes before he hesitantly reached out and picked it up, checking it to see what it was. If there were emails from students or from colleagues, he quickly responded to them before promptly shutting off his phone and placing it away from him as he didn’t want to be subjected to another flash email.

~*~*~*~*~*~

It continued on like that for the rest of the day, Zhan Yao nearly jumping out of his skin at every buzz of his phone or at every knock on his door, making him feel as if he was going crazy.

‘You’re not going crazy…you’re just sleep deprived. That’s why you’re acting paranoid’ he chided before he shook his head and let out a soft huff; he was better than this. He just needed to take a few deep breaths, push the horrifying images out of his mind, and continue working. He could do that. He did it before and he could do it again.

~*~*~*~*~*~

However, the flash emails didn’t stop, causing Zhan Yao to forgo using emails practically almost all together because every time he checked to see just who was sending him the images, the address would be different every time and he could never seem to trace them back to the original sender. So to him, every email was just a ticking time bomb and he couldn’t afford to open one and have those photos spam his phone or desktop every time, so he just…stopped using them. Was it inconvenient? Yes, very. But he was just trying to protect himself.

~*~*~*~*~*~

Thankfully, after a while, the emails seemed to cease, allowing Zhan Yao a little bit of a reprieve until one day, Bai Chi walked into his office holding an envelope.

“Dr. Zhan” he called out, making Zhan Yao look up at him.

“Yes, Bai Chi?” he replied. Bai Chi held out the envelope.

“For you” he stated. Zhan Yao frowned and took the envelope, turning it over in his hands before he looked at Bai Chi.

“No return address?” he asked. Bai Chi shook his head.

“Doesn’t look like it” he answered. Zhan Yao hummed.

“Do you know who sent it? Or who brought it?” he inquired. Bai Chi shook his head again.

“Nope. The postman just brought it up here and gave it to me, saying it was addressed to you” he stated. Zhan Yao hummed.

“I see” he murmured before he looked at him and smiled.

“Thank you, Bai Chi” he thanked. Bai Chi smiled slightly and nodded before he turned and walked out of the office, closing the door behind him. Once he was gone, Zhan Yao hummed and looked at the envelope again before he opened it and pulled out what looked like a stack of photographs.

“What’s this?” he murmured. However, he didn’t even have to look at the first photo for very long before his eyes widened and he let out a gasp, dropping the stack of photos in shock. Each photo, every single one, was that of a mutilated body. Just the like ones he had been receiving in the flash emails.

“Who is doing this?!” he exclaimed softly before he took a deep breath and knelt down, picking up the photos one by one. Nothing about them, other than the content. There were no distinct markings from the lens that could point him to a specific camera, the photo paper was one that was pretty much sold in any store…there was nothing that stood out about the photos, nothing that could tie back to who sent them. He then let out a shuddering breath before he quickly collected the photos, shoved them back into the envelope, and threw the envelope into an unused drawer of his desk before slamming the drawer with a loud slam. This was getting fucking ridiculous.

~*~*~*~*~*~

After the first anonymous envelope, Zhan Yao continue to receive envelopes with no return addresses on them, as well as flash emails, leaving him almost practically trapped. Of course, he tried to ignore them or throw them into a drawer where no one could find them, but whoever was doing this to him…wanted to invade every part of his life, including his school life. He hadn’t even realized that they had gotten to him there too until one day, when he was about to give a presentation for his class, he opened his PowerPoint to present when suddenly the screen began filling with the horrific images that he had been receiving for almost the past few weeks, causing his eyes to widen before he quickly slammed his laptop closed and looked out at his students.

“Um…I’m suddenly not feeling well, so…you’re all dismissed” he declared, his heart hammering loudly in his chest. At his dismissal, his students looked at him in concern before they began asking him if he was okay, if they needed to call the school’s nurse, or if he needed to go to the hospital. Zhao Yao, of course, just put on a fake smile and shook his head as he looked at them.

“I’m fine but thank you for your concern. I’ll be okay next week, so I will see you then” he stated. His students, of course, didn’t seem to believe him, but he just waved them out with a smile and an assurance that he would be okay the next time they saw him. Once they were sure he was really fine and there was nothing life-threatening going on, they all packed up their books and notebooks before they headed out of the classroom, Zhan Yao watching them all leave before he sank to the ground and placed his head in his hands, letting out a shuddering breath.

“Damn it. Damn it, damn it, damn it, damn it” he cursed before he let out a hiss and shifted so that he was sitting and leaning against the podium instead of kneeling before it, his head resting against the cool wood. Nothing was safe anymore.

~*~*~*~*~*~

After the last piece of his life that he thought was untouched was taken away, Zhan Yao slowly began to lose it. He hardly slept, he jumped at the slightest sound, he refused to look at or touch any electronic device unless it was a landline phone, and he just…wasn’t acting like himself. And it was concerning everyone, especially Bai Yutong, who decided to take it into his own hand and check on him.

“Hey. You okay?” he asked one day as he stepped into Zhan Yao’s office, making Zhan Yao look up at him before he nodded.

“I’m fine” he replied. Bai Yutong frowned.

“You keep saying that, but I don’t think you actually are” he stated, making Zhan Yao give him a look.

“Oh, are you psychoanalyzing me now?” he sneered. Bai Yutong tsked.

“Oh come on, Zhan Yao, anybody with eyes can see that something’s wrong. You jump and flinch at the slightest sounds, you hardly ever touch your computer or your phone, you look at mail like it’s going to suddenly come to life and attack you…” he started before he sighed softly.

“And I know you haven’t been sleeping at night” he stated. Zhan Yao was quiet before he sighed softly.

“I’m just under a lot of stress right now” he murmured. Bai Yutong frowned.

“Do we need to talk to Bao Sir? Do you need time off?” he asked. Zhan Yao shook his head.

“No. No, I’m okay” he assured. Bai Yutong made a face.

“Zhan Yao—” he started.

“God damn it, Bai Yutong, I’m FINE!” Zhan Yao snapped, causing Bai Yutong to look at him in shock as he let out a harsh breath.

“I’m fine. Just…leave me alone. Please” he requested. Bai Yutong was quiet before he turned and quietly exited his office, Zhan Yao staring after him before he let out a heavy sigh and ran a through his hair.

“Fuck” he whispered. Just then, there was a knock on his door, making him jump before he looked up at it and huffed.

“I thought I said—” he started when the door opened and Bai Yutong poked his head in.

“I know what you said, but we got a case” he stated. Zhan Yao looked at him before he took a deep breath and nodded.

“Alright, let’s go” he declared.

~*~*~*~*~*~

When they arrived at the scene, everyone made their way inside the house, but the minute Zhan Yao stepped inside, his eyes widened and he took a step back as he shook his head.

“No” he whispered, making Bai Yutong look over at him in confusion.

“Zhan Yao?” he asked, only for Zhan Yao to shake his head again.

“No, no, no” he breathed before he turned and all but bolted out of the house, making Bai Yutong and the others stare after him in shock.

“Zhan Yao!” Bai Yutong shouted before he looked over at the others and motioned to the scene.

“Start processing, I’ll be right back” he declared before he turned and ran out of the crime scene, searching around before he finally found Zhan Yao crouching against a tree, his head buried in his knees.

“Zhan Yao?” he whispered, staring at the forensic psychologist in concern before he slowly made his way over to him and knelt before him.

“Zhan Yao?” he called out softly. When Zhan Yao didn’t answer, Bai Yutong reached out and placed a gentle hand on his arm, just as his head snapped up, his eyes wide like a frightened deer.

“Zhan Yao” Bai Yutong breathed, staring back at him with wide eyes before he shook his head.

“Zhan Yao, what’s wrong?” he asked. Zhan Yao, of course, didn’t answer, causing him to frown.

“Come on, Zhan Yao, talk to me” he begged. Zhan Yao just shook his head.

“So much blood. So much blood, so many body parts…it’s too much, there’s too much. It’s all red. It’s all red and it’s real and—” he started when Bai Yutong frowned.

“What are you talking about?” he asked. Zhan Yao shook his head again.

“It’s real. My nightmares are real and they’re here. I thought I locked them away. I thought I locked them away, I thought I ignored them, but they’re here and—” he started before he began to hyperventilate, something Bai Yutong had never seen him do before, causing Bai Yutong’s eyes to widen before he reached out and grasped him by the arms.

“Zhan Yao” he breathed, making Zhan Yao look at him with wide eyes, his chest still rising and falling rapidly, as he nodded.

“Breathe. Breathe, it’s okay. I’ve got you. I’m here. Breathe for me” he instructed. Zhan Yao nodded weakly and tried to take deep breaths, but his breaths kept catching in his chest, causing him to shake his head.

“I can’t. I can’t, Bai Yutong, I can’t—” he gasped, just as Bai Yutong reached out and gently grabbed one of his hands, placing it over his heart before he began to breathe deeply. Zhan Yao stared at him for a moment before he began to copy his breathing, both men breathing deeply until Bai Yutong could hear that Zhan Yao’s breathing was less haggard and more steady, making him nod encouragingly.

“There you go. There you go, Cat, good” he praised as they continued to breathe together until Zhan Yao let out a soft sob and shook his head.

“I’m sorry” he croaked. Bai Yutong shook his head.

“You have nothing to apologize for” he assured as he released his hand before he slowly stood to his feet and looked down at him.

“Can you stand?” he asked. Zhan Yao looked up at him and nodded weakly.

“I think so” he replied before he slowly pushed himself to his feet, using the tree to stabilize himself before he looked at Bai Yutong.

“Mouse, I—” he started when the world suddenly spun and he nearly collapsed had Bai Yutong not surged forward and wrapped his arms around him, pulling him close.

“I’m taking you home” he declared. Zhan Yao frowned.

“But…the case…” he started.

“Fuck the case, the others can take care of it. Right now, I’m taking you home and that’s final” Bai Yutong declared. Zhan Yao looked at him before he nodded.

“Okay” he agreed. Bai Yutong then led him over to the car and helped him inside before he got into the driver’s side and turned on the car, speeding away.

~*~*~*~*~*~

When they reached the apartment, Zhan Yao and Bai Yutong headed inside, Bai Yutong’s grip on Zhan Yao’s arm firm yet and comforting as he guided him over the couch and sat him down, waiting for him settle before he sat down beside him and looked at him.

“Talk to me” he instructed. Zhan Yao was quiet before he let out a shuddering breath.

“I don’t…remember exactly when it happened but…one day I got an email. I thought it was like any other email, so I clicked on it but…it was full of images…bloody, gory images so horrible that I didn’t even have time to process what I was looking at. And they just kept coming. I couldn’t stop them or close the email, so I had to unplug my computer just to make it stop. But I also get emails on my phone, so they came through there too…that’s why I cursed that day in the car. Because I had received another email” he explained. Bai Yutong frowned.

“Do you still have the email?” he asked. Zhan Yao nodded as he pulled out his phone.

“I never deleted them…I wanted to keep them as evidence” he explained before he headed to his inbox and pulled up the most recent email he had received before he clicked on it and handed it to Bai Yutong, the gory images immediately filling the screen, each picture more gruesome than the last. As Bai Yutong stared at the images, he glanced over at Zhan Yao, whose eyes were squeezed shut as to not see them, before he clicked off the phone and placed it down.

“And you received how many of those emails?” he asked. Zhan Yao shook his head.

“I’ve lost count” he answered before he looked at him.

“And it’s not just emails…I have printed photos as well” he stated. Bai Yutong’s eyes widened.

“Printed photos?” he repeated. Zhan Yao nodded.

“They came to me in an envelope with no return or address or sender…just my name. They’re locked away in a drawer in my desk, I don’t know how many envelopes I have in there…I’ve lost count of those too” he murmured. Bai Yutong shook his head.

“How long has this been going on?!” he demanded. Zhan Yao shook his head.

“I don’t know…a while” he answered. Bai Yutong looked at him in shock.

“And you never said anything?!” he exclaimed. Zhan Yao huffed.

“I was trying to take care of it on my own! I thought if I ignored the emails and the anonymous envelopes, whoever was doing this would stop…but they didn’t” he replied as he shook his head, tears coming to his eyes.

“I can’t sleep because any time I close my eyes, all I see is blood and body parts and I’ve seen so much at this point that it’s all just blurring together into one big, massive blob. And every time I close my eyes, that blob is reaching for me, trying to drag me in, just like that drawing from Zhao Jue’s cell our first case together” he explained before he took a deep breath and wiped his eyes, looking at Bai Yutong.

“And that’s what I saw at the scene…I saw that blob. Just this mass of blood and body parts and I thought…I thought my nightmare and come to life, and I just couldn’t” he croaked. Bai Yutong was quiet and didn’t say anything for a moment before he reached out and pulled him in for a hug, holding him tightly as he rested his chin on his head.

“Oh Zhan Yao” he whispered, causing Zhan Yao to let out a soft sob.

“I’m so tired, Yutong” he whimpered. Bai Yutong nodded.

“I know. I know you are” he murmured before he pulled away and looked him in the eyes.

“Come on, let’s get you to bed” he offered, only for Zhan Yao’s eyes to widen as he shook his head.

“No! No, I can’t sleep. If I sleep, then—” he started when Bai Yutong shook his head.

“You can’t stay awake forever” he argued. Zhan Yao nodded.

“I know. I know I can’t but…” he started before he trailed off, trying to find a good excuse when Bai Yutong nodded.

“Alright…alright, how about this? I’m going to go and figure out who’s been sending you the emails and photos and after I take care of them…I’ll come back here and we’ll go to bed. Together” he declared. Zhan Yao looked at him hopefully.

“Together?” he repeated. Bai Yutong nodded.

“Together. So can you hold out a little while longer?” he asked. Zhan Yao nodded.

“I can” he assured. Bai Yutong nodded.

“Okay” he replied before he leaned forward and pressed a soft kiss to his forehead, his lips lingers for a moment before he pulled away and looked at him.

“I’ll be right back” he declared. Zhan Yao nodded again.

“Okay” he replied. Bai Yutong nodded before he pushed himself to his feet and headed towards the door, opening it before he stepped out, quietly shutting the door behind him before he walked away from the apartment, his eyes full of rage. Someone…was going to die.

~*~*~*~*~*~

After leaving their apartment, Bai Yutong headed back to S.C.I. and made a beeline for Zhan Yao’s office, stepping inside before he walked over to Zhan Yao’s desk and pulled open every single drawer except one, which was locked.

‘That must be the drawer’ he thought to himself before he quickly picked the lock and pulled it open, his eyes widening at the sight of what looked like over a hundred plan envelopes addressed to Zhan Yao. At he stared the envelopes, he felt rage begin to bubble up within him, causing him to growl softly before he reached into the drawer and grabbed out an envelope, opening it before he pulled out the stack of photos, his stomach twisting as the gore that he had seen on Zhan Yao’s phone stared back at him. He then took a deep breath and shoved the photos back in the envelope before he closed it and slammed the drawer shut, making sure it was locked before he headed out of the office and shut the door behind him. Now it was time to see an old nemesis.

~*~*~*~*~*~

A little while later, Bai Yutong arrived a building he had visited many times and quickly headed inside, looking up at the spiral staircase before he took a deep breath.

“Zh—” he started.

“It’s rare for you to come by yourself, Chief Bai” a voice called out, making Bai Yutong spin around, his eyes widening at the sight of Zhao Jue, who seemed to have just materialized out of thin air, before he huffed.

“Trust me, if I didn’t have a good reason for being here, I wouldn’t be here” he stated. Zhao Jue raised an eyebrow.

“Oh? And why are you here?” he inquired. Bai Yutong pulled out the envelope he had taken from Zhao Yao’s desk and handed it to him.

“Zhan Yao’s been receiving these photos for god knows how long and I want to know who might be torturing him like this” he explained. Zhao Jue hummed and opened the envelope, puling out the stack of photos before he went through them, humming softly.

“These are quite graphic” he mused, making Bai Yutong scoff.

“No shit” he replied, just as Zhao Jue looked at him.

“And you said Zhan Yao’s been receiving them?” he asked. Bai Yutong nodded.

“Yeah. He has over a hundred envelopes full of photos just like those in his desk and the department and I don’t even know how many more emails full of the same images” he explained. Zhao Jue hummed softly.

“This is some serious psychological torture. I’m amazed Xiao Yao held out as long as he did” he murmured. Bai Yutong nodded.

“Me too” he admitted softly. Zhao Jue looked at him in surprise before he hummed.

“So, you came to me to figure out who might want to hurt him so badly?” he asked. Bai Yutong nodded.

“Yes” he replied before he shook his head.

“He had a panic attack at a scene today and I’ve…I’ve never seen Zhan Yao so scared” he stated. Zhao Jue hummed softly before he held up the photos.

“Well, whoever wanted to hurt Zhan Yao knew that he has an aversion to scenes like this” he declared, making Bai Yutong frown.

“But he’s seen bloody scenes before” he argued. Zhao Jue huffed and held out the stack of photos.

“Yes, but did you notice that in all of the photos, the bodies belong to children and teens?” he asked. Bai Yutong frowned and reached out, taking the stack of photos from him before he analyzed the photos, his eyes widening in horror when he realized that Zhao Jue was right.

“Oh god…Zhan Yao hates cases that have to deal with kids” he murmured. Zhao Jue nodded.

“Whoever sent these photos knew that…and exploited it” he declared. Bai Yutong looked at him.

“Are these photos…real?” he asked. Zhao Jue nodded.

‘They are very much so real. There’s no sign of any editing or manipulation…these are real bodies” he declared. Bai Yutong growled.

“What sort of monster—” he started.

“One who has some sort of grudge against Zhan Yao” Zhao Jue interrupted. Bai Yutong frowned.

“A grudge?” he repeated. Zhao Jue nodded.

“Yes” he replied, making Bai Yutong shake his head incredulously.

“Are you kidding me?! A grudge did this?!” he exclaimed, pointing to the stack of photos. Zhao Jue nodded again.

“Yes” he confirmed. Bai Yutong shook his head.

“What a sick bastard” he spat. Zhao Jue hummed.

“I believe I have to agree” he replied, just as Bai Yutong shook his head.

“But who would have a grudge against Zhan Yao?” he asked. Zhao Jue hummed and inclined his head.

“Have you considered the people closest to him?” he inquired. Bai Yutong frowned.

“None of us have a grudge against him” he argued. Zhao Jue chuckled.

“Not you, silly boy. Others. From the Psychology Department” he stated. Bai Yutong raised an eyebrow.

“You think someone from the Psychology Department has a grudge against him?” he asked. Zhao Jue smiled slightly.

“It never hurts to look into it, does it?” he replied. Bai Yutong was quiet before he nodded.

“I’ll take a look” he declared. Zhao Jue nodded.

“See that you do” he replied. Bai Yutong dipped his head.

“Thanks” he thanked before he turned to leave when Zhao Jue looked at him.

“Bai Yutong” he called out, making Bai Yutong pause and turn to look at him as he looked him in the eyes.

“When you find them…please do give me a call. I’d like to…have a little talk with them” he stated. Bai Yutong’s eyes widened slightly before he smirked.

“I think that can be arranged” he replied before he turned and continued out of the building, Zhao Jue watching him leave with the faintest hint of a smile on his lips.

~*~*~*~*~*~

After Bai Yutong left Zhao Jue’s, he returned to S.C.I., where the others were waiting for him.

“Bai Sir! Is Dr. Zhan okay?” Bai Chi asked, concern in his eyes. Bai Yutong looked over at him, and the others, before he shook his head.

“No. He’s not” he replied before he looked at Jiang Ling.

“Jiang Ling, I want you to talk to the IT department and have them give you access to Zhan Yao’s emails. He’s been receiving flash emails full of gory mutilated bodies for well over a few weeks now but has no way to figure out who’s sending them. I want you to figure it out. But be careful and take breaks so that you don’t make yourself sick” he instructed. Jiang Ling frowned.

“Gory…photos?” she repeated hesitantly. Bai Yutong nodded as he pulled out the envelope he had shown Zhao Jue.

“He also has at least a hundred of envelopes, just like this, in his desk drawer full of the same photos” he stated before he looked over at Gongsun, who had come out of his office.

“Gongsun, I need you to see if any of the envelopes has saliva on the seals or if the seals were sealed another way. And if there are any fingerprints on the photos. I know there will be fingerprints from Zhan Yao, myself, and Zhao Jue, but I’m sure some of the envelopes have to be unopened so see if our mysterious sender got sloppy” he stated. Gongsun nodded and walked over to him, taking the envelope as he looked at Bai Chi.

“Bai Chi, go collect the other envelopes from Zhan Yao’s office and help Gongsun” he ordered. Bai Chi nodded and rushed to Zhan Yao’s office to grab the other envelopes as Bai Yutong looked at Zhao Fu, Wang Shao, and Ma Han.

“I want you three to start checking out the Psychology Department. Zhao Jue thinks that whoever sent the photos has a serious grudge against Zhan Yao” he stated. Ma Han looked at him in shock.

“You went to talk to Zhao Jue?!” she exclaimed. Bai Yutong nodded.

“He’s the only person I could think of that could help with this, so yes, I went to him. Now figure out who has a grudge against Zhan Yao, let’s go!” he barked. Ma Han, Wang Shao, and Zhao Fu nodded, quickly rushing out to start questioning those who worked in the Psychology Department to see if maybe someone had an idea as to who might hate Zhan Yao so much that they would subject him to such psychological torture.

~*~*~*~*~*~

A little while later, Bai Yutong walked over to Jiang Ling and raised an eyebrow.

“Jiang Ling. Are you okay?” he asked. Jiang Ling looked up at him, her bright brown eyes glistening with tears.

“It’s awful, Bai Sir. Dr. Zhan had to deal with this?” she asked. Bai Yutong nodded.

“Yes, he did” he replied before he tilted his head.

“Were you able to find anything?” he inquired. Jiang Ling shook her head.

“No. Whoever this person is, they’re using zombie emails and probably a VPN…it’s making it difficult for me to trace it back” she replied. Bai Yutong hummed.

“But you can do it, right?” he asked. Jiang Ling looked up at him.

“For Dr. Zhan? I can” she assured. Bai Yutong smiled.

“Good. Thank you” he thanked. Jiang Ling nodded before she steeled herself and clicked on another email, quickly shutting her eyes as her desktop flooded with gruesome images. While she was working on finding out who was sending the emails, Bai Yutong headed to Gongsun’s lab and poked his head inside.

“How are we coming?” he asked. Gongsun and Bai Chi looked up at him before Gongsun shook his head.

“So far, nothing. I’ve swabbed at least a dozen seals and nothing is coming back with any DNA but I’ll keep looking because he probably got sloppy. Nothing is popping for fingerprints either right now” he stated. Bai Yutong nodded.

“Keep looking” he instructed before he stepped back and closed the door, just as Ma Han, Wang Shao, and Zhao Fu rushed into the department.

“Bai Sir!” they exclaimed, making him look over at them and raise an eyebrow.

“You got something?” he asked. Wang Shao nodded.

“Yeah. We asked around and everyone kept pointing us to one person in particular: Tian Xiao Jie” he declared. Bai Yutong frowned.

“Tian Xiao Jie?” he repeated. Ma Han nodded as she handed him a file.

“His file, sir” she stated. Bai Yutong hummed and opened it, looking it over before he looked at them.

“Bring him in” he ordered. The three members nodded and quickly turned, heading out to find Tian Xiao Jie while Bai Yutong pulled out his phone and dialed a number.

“Hello?” a voice answered.

“We found him” Bai Yutong declared.

“I’ll be right there” the voice confirmed.

~*~*~*~*~*~

A little while later, when Bai Yutong arrived at the interrogation room, Zhao Jue was already there, waiting for him.

“You got here quickly” he mused. Zhao Jue smirked slightly before he glanced at him.

“Does Heizei know what you’re doing?” he asked. Bai Yutong shook his head.

“No, but I think he’d be okay with this” he replied. Zhao Jue chuckled.

“I won’t hurt them, if that’s what you’re worried about” he stated. Bai Yutong laughed.

“Oh no, I’ll do the hurting. You just get them to talk if they won’t talk to me” he instructed. Zhao Jue nodded.

“Of course” he replied before they both headed into the interrogation room, Tian Xiao Jie looking at them with wide eyes.

“What’s the meaning of this? What is going on?” he demanded. Bai Yutong looked at him.

“Tian Xiao Jie, correct?” he asked. Tian Xiao Jie nodded.

“Yes. Can you please tell me what I’m doing here?” he demanded. Bai Yutong crossed his arms.

“I hear you’re a little bit bitter towards Zhan Yao. Care to tell us why?” he inquired. Tian Xiao Jie was quiet before he huffed.

“He thinks he’s so great and so smart and so clever…he’s really not” he grumbled. Zhao Jue raised an eyebrow.

“And do you think you’re smarter and more clever than him?” he asked, even though both he and Bai Yutong knew that no one was smarter than Zhan Yao. Tian Xiao Jie scoffed.

“Of course I do. He’s so young, he can’t possibly know as much as me” he declared. Bai Yutong hummed.

“So you’re angry that Zhan Yao has all of these accolades and awards and is a deputy leader while you’re stuck in the Psychology Department. Is that it?” he asked. Tian Xiao Jie looked at him before he growled.

“He doesn’t deserve any of it” he hissed. Bai Yutong nodded slowly, just as there was a knock on the door, making him look over at it before he walked over and opened it to reveal Gongsun standing outside, an envelope in one hand and a piece of paper in the other.

“You got something?” he asked. Gongsun smirked and held out the piece of paper.

“See for yourself” he replied. Bai Yutong hummed and took the piece of paper, reading it through carefully before his eyes widened and he slowly looked over at Tian Xiao Jie, who was looking back at him, before he looked back at Gongsun, a feral edge slipping into his gaze.

“We’ve got him?” he whispered. Gongsun nodded.

“We’ve got him” he confirmed. Bai Yutong grinned and took the envelope from him before he dipped his head and took a step back, closing the door before he turned and walked back over to Tian Xiao Jie and Zhao Jue, slamming the envelope down in front of Tian Xiao Jie.

“So you think he deserves this?” he asked. Tian Xiao Jie looked at the envelope and frowned.

“What is this?” he replied. Bai Yutong motioned to it.

“Open it” he ordered. Tian Xiao Jie frowned and opened the envelope, pulling out the stack of photos before he let out a gasp and quickly put the photos down, shoving them away just as Bai Yutong shook his head.

“Oh no, don’t you look away. Don’t you dare look away” he growled as he pointed to the photos.

“You don’t get to look away when you’ve subjected Zhan Yao to this for weeks, maybe even months. So look at them! Look at your work!” he roared. Tian Xiao Jie looked at him before he shook his head.

“I didn’t send these to Zhan Yao” he argued. Bai Yutong raised an eyebrow.

“No? Then why did we find your DNA on the envelopes that were sent to him?” he asked before he slammed down the results Gongsun had brought, making Tian Xiao Jie’s eyes widen as he looked at the results before he looked at Bai Yutong and shook his head.

“Just because my DNA were on the envelopes doesn’t mean I sent these photos to him” he argued. Bai Yutong huffed.

“We also found your fingerprints on a few of the photos that were in the envelopes” he stated, tapping the results paper again just as his phone rang, making him pick it up and answer it.

“Bai” he answered.

“Bai Sir” Jiang Ling greeted.

“Jiang Ling” Bai Yutong replied.

“I was able to finally trace the emails back to someone” Jiang Ling declared.

“Tian Xiao Jie?” Bai Yutong inferred.

“Yes sir” Jiang Ling confirmed. Bai Yutong grinned.

“That’s all I need, Jiang Ling, thank you” he thanked before he hung up and looked at Tian Xiao Jie.

“Besides fingerprints and DNA, we also have evidence of you sending flash emails full of images to Zhan Yao. We traced all of your zombie accounts back to you” he declared, Tian Xiao Jie’s eyes widening in shock before he shook his head.

“I’ve done no such thing! You’re making it up!” he shouted. Bai Yutong raised an eyebrow before he looked at Zhao Jue.

“Would you like a crack at him?” he asked. Zhao Jue smiled.

“Only if you’re done with him” he replied. Bai Yutong motioned to Tian Xiao Jie.

“He’s all yours” he declared before he turned and headed out of the interrogation room, quietly closing the door behind him before he leaned against it, letting out a heavy sigh. Now Zhan Yao could finally rest.

~*~*~*~*~*~

A little while later, Zhao Jue came out of the room, Bai Yutong raising an eyebrow at him.

“Did he say anything?” he asked. Zhao Jue nodded.

“He did. And I got it in writing” he stated before he held out a pen and pad to him, much to his surprise.

“He just…wrote it all down?” he asked. Zhao Jue smirked.

“Of course” he replied. Bai Yutong frowned.

“You didn’t coerce him?” he asked. Zhao Jue huffed.

“I’m not so stupid as to use techniques that could get Xiao Yao’s case thrown out on a technicality. You can check the cameras to see that everything I did is perfectly by the book” he stated. Bai Yutong frowned.

“But I turned the cameras off for the particular interview” he murmured, making Zhao Jue smirk.

“Then you’re just going to have to trust me” he declared. Bai Yutong hummed and looked at the confession before he reached out and took it from him.

“Thank you” he thanked. Zhao Jue nodded.

“You’re welcome” he replied as he reached and patted his shoulder before he walked past him, only to pause and look back at him.

“Take care of Zhan Yao, understand?” he instructed. Bai Yutong nodded.

“I will” he assured. Zhao Jue nodded before he continued on his way, Bai Yutong watching him leave before he looked down at the confession again and sighed; time to get this to Bao Sir.

~*~*~*~*~*~

After dropping the confession off to Bao Sir and explaining the whole situation, Bao Sir assured him that he would quietly deal with Tian Xiao Jie as well as figure out where the remains from the photos were, making Bai Yutong smile slightly before he turned and headed out of the Hong Kong Police Department, heading home.

~*~*~*~*~*~

When he arrived home, he quickly unlocked the door and stepped inside, looking around before he found Zhan Yao sitting on the couch, mindlessly watching a movie.

“Cat” he called out, making Zhan Yao look over at him and when he saw him, he smiled weakly.

“Mouse” he replied before he pushed himself to his feet and walked over to him, tilting his head.

“Did you find them?” he asked. Bai Yutong grinned.

“I did” he replied. Zhan Yao looked at him hopefully.

“So it’s over?” he asked. Bai Yutong nodded.

“It’s over” he confirmed before he reached out and gently cupped his face in his hand, stroking his cheek.

“You can rest now” he whispered, causing Zhan Yao to shut his eyes and let out a soft sigh of relief before he leaned forward and rested his head on his shoulder.

“Thank you” he whispered. Bai Yutong nodded as he pressed a soft kiss to the side of his head.

“Come on, let’s go lie down” he suggested. Zhan Yao nodded and pulled away before they both headed to the bedroom and crawled into bed, Bai Yutong wrapping his arms around Zhan Yao as he pulled him close.

“I’ve got you. I’m not going to let any nightmares scare you or hurt you, okay? You’re safe here” he assured. Zhan Yao smiled and nodded as he tucked himself against him.

“I know. Thank you, Mouse” he murmured. Bai Yutong nodded as he pressed a soft kiss to his hair.

“You’re welcome, Cat” he replied. They both then shut their eyes, Zhan Yao allowing himself to relax in the safety of Bai Yutong’s arms as Bai Yutong held him tightly. He wouldn’t let any nightmares get to Zhan Yao. He had suffered enough…he wasn’t going to let him suffer anymore. While he was holding Zhan Yao tightly, Zhan Yao slowly began to drift off and as he felt sleep begin to take him, for the first time in a long time, he found himself at peace; his mind finally silent. It would take a while for him to return to “normal”, but with Bai Yutong here, by his side, to keep away the nightmares…normal didn’t seem all that far out of reach.

#sass writes #s.c.i. 谜案集 #bai yutong #zhan yao #yaoyutong #tw panic attack

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master-sass-blast · 2 years

Text

T.L.C.

Summary: A study on Piotr's character as he cares for the Reader through her pregnancy and medication withdrawal symptoms.

Set after "The Long Awaited Arrival."

Pairing(s): Piotr Rasputin x Reader.

Rating: T for panic attacks, vomiting, medication withdrawal symptoms, and other features of hurt/comfort.

Word Count: 3.8k.

Update Time: So! After three months, the first place I was referred to for physical therapy did not contact me! Hooray!

But, fortunately, I got a new referral to a new place, and they contacted me within two days. I finally have an appointment scheduled for the end of the month.

Thank you all for being patient with the delays in updating the series. My pain makes it difficult to sleep and write; suffice to say, I've been exhausted the past few months. I'm hoping that with physical therapy, I'll finally get my pain managed and get back to having a life.

I hope you're all doing well. Thank you so much for reading and for sticking with the series!

Taglist: @marvel-is-perfection, @chromecutie, @girl-obsessed-with-things, @super-darkcloudstudent, @leo-writer, @dandyqueen, @sadstone-s

There’s a lot of ups and downs to pregnancy.

Not that Piotr knows from being pregnant; obviously, he’s not quite –ahem–outfitted with the proper “parts” for carrying and delivering a baby. But he remembers his mother being pregnant with Illyana. Granted, she’d always kept a pretty straight face through it all, but he could remember her not eating certain foods because they’d make her feel sick, or having to adjust how she worked on the family farm as her belly grew –not to mention the cranky period she went through while cold turkey-ing off coffee. (Alexandra was right to fuss over her husband for smoking, but her caffeine addiction was just as bad –if not worse.)

He could remember his father allocating extra time to care for his mother, too. There’d been several days where Piotr came home from school to find Nikolai making a fresh batch of chicken dumpling soup for his wife because it was the only thing Alex could keep down during the first trimester. Countless evenings of witnessing his father massage his mother’s shoulders, back, legs, and feet. Late night runs to the kitchen to whip up craving snacks. All done as Nikolai did nearly everything his family asked of him –with a loving smile and nod.

So, when Piotr comes home after prepping his classroom for school the following week and finds you perched on the couch, curled over a mop bucket, heaving up your lunch, his response comes naturally.

He’s had a good teacher his whole life, after all.

***

His first order of business is holding your hair and soothing you while you puke.

He’s grateful, at times like this, that he has a strong stomach. Granted, even if he didn’t, he’d still tough it out for you. But not having to fight down his own queasiness makes it easier to focus on caring for you.

“It’s –it’s just the medication withdrawals,” you pant once you catch your breath. “I’m fine, it’s just the meds–”

Piotr winces, chest aching with sympathy when you gag and retch into the bucket again. “It is okay, myshka. Let your body do what is natural.”

You cough, then groan. Your cheeks are wet from tears caused by your gagging. “Fuck.” You dry heave, then sigh. “I’m fine. You –you don’t have to–”

He shushes you gently. “I am staying right here. Just focus on what your body is doing.”

***

Once your stomach’s done, he ushers you upstairs to rest in bed and cleans the vomit bucket.

He’s glad to have had some foresight for all this. Aside from the well-known symptoms of pregnancy –hello, morning sickness–he’d expected another round of illness when your specialist had advised you to reduce the dose of your anxiety medication. He’s seen you go through withdrawals before; aside from the mental symptoms, they always made you sick. So, after that appointment, he’d stocked up –chicken soup, ginger ale, saltines, applesauce, some of your favorite chocolates just to help sweeten (pun intended) the whole ordeal.

He sprays some Lysol into the –now empty–mop bucket and sets it aside to dry, then frowns when he hears you groan. “Are you okay?”

“Just chills,” you reply from the bedroom. “Fucking withdrawals.”

Piotr grimaces. Your back’s been hurting, too; he’s felt you tossing and turning next to him in bed for a few weeks now. He pads back into the bedroom, then kneels down on your side of the bed so he’s at eye level with you. “Do you need medicine? Or your heating pad?”

You shake your head, expression one of resigned misery. “No. It is what it is.” You crack one eye open and manage a small smile, then reach out and stroke his cheek. “But thank you, love.”

He frowns. Another trait he inherited from his father: he doesn’t like not being able to help. Piotr watches you for a moment, mulling over in his mind what might bring you some comfort and relaxation –then puts a gentle hand on your shoulder when an idea pops into his head. “Would you like to take hot bath?”

You’re quiet for a moment. Then, you stretch and nod. “Actually, yeah. That sounds good.”

He kisses your temple before standing. “Alright. I will draw hot bath for you, myshka.”

You grab the hem of his shirt before he can walk away. “Will you soak with me?”

“Konechno –if you want.”

“Yeah. You holding me sounds really good right now.”

Piotr smiles softly, then bends over and kisses your cheek before heading to the bathroom to get the tub ready.

Mostly, he just has to wait for the water to heat up and for the basin to fill –the latter, of course, takes the longest. There aren’t many tubs that fit him; the one in the master bathroom was a custom job. As such, filling it is a drawn-out process requiring a great deal of patience. For that reason –and the water usage–neither of you use the tub often.

It’s still nice to have, though. It makes for a nice treat, every now and then, to enjoy a luxurious soak instead of a more practical shower. And, in situations like these, Piotr’s glad to have a tub that fits him (even if the monthly utility bill is nowhere near as grateful).

He sets fresh towels next to the tub, makes sure the bath mat is in place (your sense of balance keeps changing as your belly keeps growing, and he doesn’t want you slipping on the tile floor), then grabs a change of clothes for him and fresh pajamas for you: a pair of leggings and one of his shirts. That’s what you’ve been comfortable wearing lately; he’s certainly not about to deny you anything that makes you comfortable. He opts against any scented oils or bath bombs; both your skin and nose have been sensitive lately. Once the tub basin is –finally–full enough for a soak, he goes back to the bedroom and collects you.

He helps you undress first, then quickly strips down before –carefully–climbing into the tub. He slowly settles in the steaming water –he doesn’t want to slosh water all over the bathroom floor–then holds one arm out to you once he’s situated.

You let out a soft, pleased groan when you climb into the tub and quickly settle in his lap, making little waves lap against the tub’s porcelain walls. You pillow your head against his shoulder and sigh. “Thanks, baby. This is nice.”

“Konechno.” He kisses the top of your head and wraps one arm around your back to help support your weight. “We can stay here as long as you want.”

You giggle, quiet. Barely there. “Until we’re all pruney and gross.”

Piotr chuckles and kisses your forehead. “Da –until we are shriveled raisins.”

“You’re gonna be one big raisin, buster,” you quip, tone warming with amusement. “I don’t even want to see the grape vine that grew you.”

He considers for a moment, then laughs again. “You have met my mother.”

You go quiet for a moment. Then, you bust out laughing –hard, hearty, joyous laughs that make your shoulders shake against him. “Shit, you’re right! I didn’t even think of that.”

He grins and holds you closer. One hand slips beneath the water to support your stomach, so he can feel it quiver as you laugh.

He’s missed hearing you laugh like this.

***

Your panic attacks don’t scare him.

He’s served as an X-Man and mentor at Xavier’s for years. He’s seen all manner of mutations and side effects –including how emotional distress can lessen a mutant’s control of their abilities. What’s more, he’s seen how your emotional distress affects your powers; he knows the kind of carnage you’re capable of unleashing.

So, when he comes home from running errands on a Sunday morning and gets greeted to a rush of wind and you balled up on the floor, sobbing while the curtains flap wildly, he drops his things on the table inside the front door and runs over to you.

“No!” You try to shove him away when he pulls you into his arms. “No, no –just leave–”

“It’s okay,” he assures you, drawing you into his lap anyway. His throat constricts with grief when you let out a broken sob. “It’s okay, myshka. Everything will be okay. Just breathe and let wave pass.”

Eventually, the anxiety does pass. The curtains settle back into their normal hanging positions. Your breathing settles, and your body slowly relaxes against his.

Once he’s checked that you’re okay and that you don’t have any immediate needs, Piotr leans back against the base of the couch and just holds you. He stays quiet so you can focus on processing. Occasionally, he checks in to make sure you’re still doing okay. Kisses your forehead, your temples, the top of your head, your cheeks –whatever he can reach, really.

After a while, you sniff. Then, in a scratchy voice, you murmur, “Maybe… maybe I should move back into Xavier’s while I’m pregnant.”

His brows furrow together in alarm and confusion. “Why? Why would you need to do that?”

“If –if I’m going to have more –more panic attacks and episodes again–”

Piotr shakes his head automatically. “Nyet. Absolutely not. This is your home, dorogoy.” He strokes your cheek when you tip your head back and look up at him. “You have every right to be here.”

“Piotr, be reasonable,” you sigh. “I could blow out the fucking windows with a breath.”

“Then we will get new windows.”

Your jaw tightens. Your chin quivers, and you avert your gaze. “I could kill you.”

His heart aches in his chest at how defeated, how certain your voice sounds. He says your name –softly, tenderly–and gently presses his fingers under your chin until you look up at him. “I could kill you, also.”

“It’s not the same,” you mutter, looking away again.

“I break dishes without meaning to,” he reasons as he strokes your hair. “I could crush other’s feet if I am not careful about where I step. If I do not pay attention to how much force I use, I leave bruises. Breaking bones, crushing organs with a hug –it is not out of the question.”

You shake your head. “If you have a panic attack, you won’t break someone’s bones just by being in the same room with them.”

“I know.” He kisses the top of your head. “But I do not want you being unduly unkind to yourself.” When you hum in assent, he hugs you close and kisses your forehead. “What triggered this one?”

You let out a shaky breath. “Saw my mom standing on the stairs. Thought she was real.”

Piotr frowns. It’s been a while since you’ve hallucinated. Between your meds and psychic therapy with Professor Xavier to heal the scarring on your brain, your condition’s been managed. Perhaps elevated anxiety from going off meds exacerbated injuries from scarring. “Let’s talk to Professor. You may need more sessions since you are not taking medication.”

You nod, slowly. Tiredly. “Yeah. Maybe.”

He cradles you closer against his chest and kisses your forehead again. “And… if moving back to main house is necessary, we go together. Khorosho?”

“Khorosho.” You sniff, then bury your face against his chest. “Ya tebya lyublyu.”

“Ya tozhe tebya lyublyu.”

No, your panic attacks don’t scare him.

They just break his heart.

***

School starts for the year. The first week passes in a blur; it’s a whirlwind of learning names and faces of new students, getting everyone settled back into the school year routine, getting his art and Russian language students oriented with this year’s lesson plan (no small task for the latter, since he’s teaching three classes this year to accommodate the different experience levels), and trying to keep the mansion in some semblance of order now that it’s packed to the gills, Monday through Friday.

And you… seem to be doing okay. The worst of the withdrawal symptoms have settled, and you’re doing two sessions a week with Alyssa and the Professor. You’re eating more regularly, getting back outside for walks, and have started working with new high school students on essay writing on Fridays.

He’s relieved –if only because he doesn’t like to see you suffer. He wants you to have a happy, as-stress-free-as-possible life.

But he’s also been with you –from boyfriend, to fiance, to husband–for a long time. He’s been by your side for many a breakdown. He knows firsthand that when the first storm passes, there’s usually another wall of clouds close behind.

So, when he wakes up on the second Monday of the school year and sees the light of your phone on, Piotr’s saddened, but not necessarily surprised. He blinks a few times to clear his eyes, then reaches across the bed and touches your back. “Privet.”

“Hey,” you murmur, voice heavy with exhaustion. You pause the video you’re watching, then roll over so you can look at him. “Good morning.”

Piotr frowns sadly. Your face is pinched with fatigue and stress. He brushes some hair away from your face, then cups your cheek with his hand. “Did you sleep?”

You shake your head. “Couldn’t wind down. Brain wouldn’t shut up.”

He watches as you turn your head into your pillow to hide your miserable frown. He studies you for a moment, then shifts his hand lower to rub the back of your neck. “Do you want me to stay with you today?”

“You can’t,” you reply, shaking your head automatically. “It’s a school day.”

“Is only second week of school year,” he reminds you. “It will not be end of world if I miss today.”

“I don’t want to take you away from your kids.”

Piotr shifts forward so he’s closer to you, then fishes one hand under the blankets so he can caress your faintly rounded stomach. “I have kid right here, too.” He smiles when you let out a soft –if tired–laugh, then kisses your forehead. “Do you want me to stay?”

You’re quiet for a moment. Then, you let out a shuddering breath and nod. “Yeah.”

Piotr’s heart aches at your tense, wavering tone –it sounds suspiciously like you’re about to start crying–and tugs you into a gentle hug. “Alright, myshka. I will stay with you today.”

***

You do indeed cry. He holds you until you calm down again, then gets out of bed to call Logan.

“S’too bad,” Logan gravels out –and then there’s a pause as he shouts at some of the live-in students that they get one cup of coffee each morning, no extras. “Sorry she’s hurting.”

“Ne volnuytes'. I can call my mother to sub for Russian language classes.”

“That’d be good, since none of us speak it.”

He says good-bye to Logan, then calls his mother.

Alex tuts when he gives her the news. “Poor girl. Pregnancy is hard.”

“It seems to be, yes,” Piotr agrees in Russian. “Sorry to ask last minute, but I need substitute for Russian language classes.”

“I think I can manage,” his mother replies, voice tinged with amusement. “I did run a legitimate curriculum translation business, after all. And I raised you three hooligans.”

Piotr scoffs, albeit good-naturedly. “If you stop by our house, I can walk you through where each class is at before day starts.”

“Good. I will be there shortly.”

***

His brother teleports his mother over twenty minutes after the phone call. Mikhail nods in greeting, ambles over to the fridge, and pulls out a can of lemonade before waving good-bye and winking out of view.

Piotr rolls his eyes, shakes his head, then turns to greet his mother. “Thank you, again, for helping on such short notice.”

“Of course.” She accepts his hug, then nods towards the stairs. “How is she?”

“Tired,” he answers, frowning sadly. “She did not sleep. And her anxiety has been bad.”

Alexandra tsks, sympathetic. “Poor girl.” She eyes Piotr, then smiles and squeezes his shoulder. “Good thing she has you to support her.”

Piotr smiles and ducks his head, pleased by the praise. “It goes both ways. Let me get you class schedules.” He grabs the shoulder bag he uses to transport his laptop and other school materials to and from the mansion and sets it on the kitchen counter. “I have three language classes. Entry level is at nine, intermediate is after lunch, and advanced is at two…”

By the time he’s nearly done catching his mother up, you come padding downstairs. “Hey.”

Piotr and his mother look up in unison. He leaves his mother’s side, heading over to the stairs so he can hold out a hand and steady you the rest of the way down. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, just wanted to come say hi.” You wave at Alex. “Dobroye utro.”

“Dobroye utro,” she returns before switching to English. “How are you feeling?”

“Eh.” You shrug, then cover your mouth with the back of your hand as you yawn. “Is what it is.”

Alex hums, nodding, then holds out one arm in offering. She hugs you when you accept and step closer to her, gently rubbing your back. “You are doing good job. Taking care of yourself is part of the process.”

“Thank you.” You sniff, then step back and fan your face with your hands. You let out a laugh. “Ugh, I’m all emotional.”

Alexandra chuckles. “All part of the deal.” She pats your arm. “It’ll be okay.”

“Yeah.” You blink a few times to clear your eyes, then look her over. “You look sharp!”

Alex preens a little, adjusting the lapel of her navy blue suit. “Spasibo. Nicky’s choice.”

“He’s got good taste.” You share a grin with her, then turn and hug him. “I’m gonna head back to bed.”

Piotr kisses the top of your head. “Khorosho. What would you like for breakfast?” He fixes you with a fond, yet determined look when you grimace. “Myshka, you need to eat.”

“Wow, which option will taste best when I’m throwing it up?” you mutter, dejected. “What a fabulous contemplation.”

“What about something like toast?” Alexandra suggests, slightly bemused, after watching the two of you for a moment. “Something not too heavy, can be eaten slowly. It may help.”

Piotr smiles when you relent with a grunt, then kisses the top of your head once more. “What kind of toast?”

“One piece, Mr. Giant,” you grumble –although your voice is tinged with humor. “And apricot jelly. That one’s smelled the best lately.”

“One piece of toast with apricot jelly,” Piotr parrots back, rubbing circles over your back and shoulders. “I can do that.”

“With butter,” you add, voice slightly muffled as you rest your head against his chest. “And make sure it melts all the way before you add the jelly. The texture turns weird otherwise.”

“Konechno.” Piotr leans down to kiss you, then ushers you towards the stairs. “Go rest. I will be up shortly.” When he turns back around, after you’ve made it to the second floor and he can hear your footsteps heading towards the master bedroom, he finds his mother watching him with a fond smile on her face. He frowns faintly, confused. “What?”

“You’re sweet with her,” she explains, switching back to Russian. “It’s lovely to watch.”

Piotr ducks his head, somewhat flustered by the attention from his mother, but nonetheless pleased. “It’s easy. I love her.”

Alex chuckles, then sighs. “You take after your father. Sappy.”

“I think I take after you, too,” he retorts with a soft shrug. He smiles when Alex scoffs –though the tips of his mother’s ears turn red, which is a dead giveaway that his compliment landed how he wanted–then returns to the papers laid out on the kitchen island counter. “So–”

“You’ve done a good job explaining.” She stacks the papers together, taps them against the counter to get them aligned, then tucks them back into his shoulder bag. She slings the strap over her shoulder, then pats his shoulder. “Go take care of your girl. I’ll manage.”

“Thank you, mama.” He hugs her, then watches as she strides down the hall and out the front door. He starts to follow her, then catches himself when the door shuts and latches on it’s own behind her. Right. Of course. He laughs to himself, then turns back to the kitchen. Toast time.

***

“I’m sorry.”

Piotr blinks rapidly, then angles his head down so he can look at you. His brows pinch together as he tries to puzzle out what you could possibly be apologizing for this time (you’ve fallen back into the habit of over-apologizing since reducing the dose of your medication, which isn’t all that surprising, but it concerns him). “For what?”

“For being so picky about my toast,” you murmur, tone sheepish. You tuck your head against your shoulder, thus hiding your face. “I didn’t mean to make you do all that extra work.”

“It –it was not ‘extra work,’” Piotr assures you, laughing slightly at the sheer absurdity of the notion. “You are not feeling well. You are my wife. And you are carrying my child. Taking extra fifteen seconds to make sure butter melts completely is not ‘extra work.’”

“Well… still,” you mumble before you resume nibbling at your toast. “Thank you.”

“No ‘still,’” he insists as he leans over to kiss your temple. “And you are very welcome.” He smiles when you relax a little, then settles back in to watch the video you’d pulled up on your phone–

And then his phone chirps. Once. Twice. Three times.

Piotr frowns when the fourth and fifth notifications roll in. Chto za chert…

The messages are from his students, each with pictures attached.

Pictures of his mother.

Kitty: [image attached] DUDE, YOU NEVER SAID YOUR MOM COULD PULL DAPPER BUTCH.

Ellie: [image attached] Tell ur dad he needs to pick ur mom’s outfits more often

Yukio: [image attached] Your mom looks nice!

Evan: [image attached] u never mentioned ur mom was hot dude

Evan: [image attached] is she seeing anyone lol?

You peer over his shoulder, then start laughing. “Uh oh. I think your kids may have a new favorite teacher.”

“All she did was wear a suit,” he mutters –even as he screenshots the texts to send to his parents; he knows they’ll get a kick out of them. He makes a mental note to have Logan talk to Evan about appropriate boundaries, then squints when a new text rolls in.

Ororo: I think your students have started a Snap group dedicated to your mom wearing that suit.

He sighs and rolls his eyes skywards –then smirks and looks down when he feels you start shaking next to him. “Are you alright?”

You tip your head back and let out a bright cackle. “Yeah,” you manage once you catch your breath, “I think it’s official. Your students are going to replace you after today.”

He shakes his head, still bemused, then turns off his phone and sets it back down. “Very funny, myshka.”

#sass writes #piotr rasputin x reader #tw: panic attack #tw: vomiting #tw: medication withdrawal #the reader has a rough time of it and piotr takes care of her #hurt/comfort #also alex wears a suit and everyone loses their minds sdlfkjdsflkjdslfkj #x-men fanfiction #deadpool fanfiction

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