#RL issues
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Hello guys！I'm writing just to inform you all.
I've been sick since the 25th and though i tried to heal myself, clearly failed💦 so I saw a doctor this week. The doctor said that this was not a simple flu but it was acute tonsillitis. Plus now I'm experiencing a middle ear infection due to this reason (causes extreme pain). And the doctor said it's difficult to recover for a minimum of 14 days.
In summary, i won't be around for at least two weeks… I know, i'm sorry too…… I didn't start this year well, but don't worry, i'll still continue to do my best！
I hope "you" who are reading this are at least healthy there ^^！Hope to see you all again！🙏
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when i went to school in the morning, it was 3°C. Now it's 17°C but feels like 30°C and I'm burning in a sleeveless shirt. I went through an alley and there was suddenly wind strong enough that if I had an umbrella it would have turned it inside out. what.
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So a quick update.
My grandfather's health has taken a turn for the worse and it probably won't be long now. I'm still reeling a little but mostly I'm just... exhausted.
If I seem even more spacy or vanish altogether for a few days over the next few weeks...
Yeah.
#bunny things#not gw2#rl issues#I am just really tired and the waiting is the worst part knowing what's coming
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What a weird rob- huh??
previous @tmntredline next???
#tmntredline#tmnt redline#master splinter#tang shen#rl raph#rl donnie#rl april#rl mikey#wanna come over#wco#issue 2#episode 2#fan iteration#fan comic#webcomic#webcomics#artists on tumblr
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Wait, what’s going on with Embers???? That fic has been on my read later list since 2021, what’s happened with it???
Brief overview, then I'm likely never touching this topic again, because this is not a Drama Blog:
Context: Embers is a super old AtLA fic that was written during the early fandom days, read widely at the time, and was the origin of the widely-used fanon name of "Wani" for Zuko's ship (kind of by default that it was one of the first popular fics to give his ship a name, I think?), even though most fic writers don't seem to realize it's from there anymore.
"What's Going On": I used to include a link in all my stories to it, because I believe in crediting other writers for borrowed elements, and I was using "Wani" in all my fics. But BOY did I not want to be sending readers that way anymore, so I've adopted a new name for Zuko's ship, and removed all Embers links.
None of the criticisms about Embers itself are new; I'm assuming they date back to when the fic was being written, because this isn't an "it aged badly" thing, this is an "actually yeah this gets worse the longer you think about it and I shouldn't have ignored my bad feelings just because some of the worldbuilding was interesting" thing.
An Incomplete List of Why I Made the Change:
I don't actually like the story that much anymore, and don't want to rec it
I tried to re-read it recently to see if some things were as bad as I remembered and it turns out they were So Much Worse Oh Yikes. More specifically, the treatment of Katara and Aang and their respective cultures has... rather a lot going on. One example: The Fire Nation and Air Nomads are both given multiple backstory elements in an attempt to make the average Fire Nation soldier's participation in the genocide/war in large part the fault of the Avatar and the Air Nomads themselves, and also fully justified from the Fire Nation perspective. And I do mean fully. One of its core tenants is "People from the Fire Nation (and only people from the Fire Nation) who don't follow orders Literally Die, therefore murdering pacifists and babies and continuing the war (and their regularly scheduled war crimes) is the only thing it is physically possible for them to do". I cannot emphasize enough how literal that is.
Also the name "Wani" means "Alligator" and is... objectively a pretty lame name for Zuko's ship? Where's the personality, where's the deeper meaning, where's the resonance with Zuko's themes? @tuktukpodfics initially thought I was calling the ship "Wanyi", and that's what I've switched to, because it is Objectively So Much Better. In their words: “Wànyī (萬一): Literally ‘one in ten thousand,’ ‘perchance.’ Used grammatically in Chinese to mean ‘what if’ or ‘just in case.’ I think a ship called ‘The Perchance’ is perfect for a boy clinging to false hope.”
TL:DR; I don't rec Embers anymore, because I don't actually like the story anymore, and there are things about it that get worse the more I think on them. I've removed links to it and renamed Zuko's ship to "Wanyi" ("The Perchance") because our boy deserves a ship name that reflects his character arc.
#for the record if you ever find something kind of rancid in my fics#do please let me know#EX: I've rewritten scenes to be better Actual Blind Rep for Toph based on blind reader feedback#and I'm debating how hard it would be to ignore/re-write the canon issues of Water Tribe sexism (for the Southern Tribe at the least)#because that is a common complaint I see from the people who's RL cultures the Water Tribes was based on#probably I can do more interesting things with that going forward#in other words justice for Hama and Hahn#at least the show itself made Hama excellently complex#anyways back to doing actual writing#please no follow up questions#though I will say anyone who wants to update their own fics to use Wanyi (or any other name): go for it!#all you need to do is plop your chapters in a word editor and find/replace the ship name! it took about 40 minutes to do literally#all of my fics and I had some other editing to do besides! it'll be even quicker for you!#let's sink the Wani#avatar the last airbender#atla#Zuko
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I know many people see Obi-Wan as Anakin's dad, but he's a bit more like Shmi, isn't he? Like they both tell him about the value of letting go and live by their teachings (Shmi giving him up so he could have a better life/ Obi-Wan's entire relationship with Satine) and seem to hold the title of parent in Anakin's mind. Which is why his reaction on Mustafar was so explosive; if Obi-Wan disapproved of his choices, that meant that Shmi would have too and that drives him insane
Idk really know if this is correct
I mean, I don't think seeing Obi-Wan as a father figure and Obi-Wan being similar to Shmi are mutually exclusive things. If you remove the gender from it, it just means both of them are parental figures in Anakin's life. I feel like I've seen people positing that a lack of a paternal or maternal figure in Anakin's life at different points is what fucked him up or something, but this feels like bullshit to me.
I think Anakin does see them as SEPARATE, but obviously Shmi and Obi-Wan do both hold a similar place in his life and they have similar values. I think Anakin is someone who clings pretty hard to the people he loves and he DESPERATELY needs their approval. I think in this case, Obi-Wan is separate from Shmi in this, so on Mustafar it's not really that Obi-Wan's disapproval automatically means Shmi would've disapproved and it's SHMI'S disapproval that hurts. I think Obi-Wan's disapproval hurts ON ITS OWN because he cares about Obi-Wan's opinion regardless of any connection it may or may not have to Shmi.
I also think that Obi-Wan's opinion connects to how good of a JEDI Anakin is. Obi-Wan is a consummate Jedi, and if we take his word for it, Anakin sees Obi-Wan as the wisest and most powerful of all the Jedi. If Obi-Wan disapproves of him and his choices, it means Anakin isn't a good Jedi. And if he's not a good Jedi, perhaps he's not a good PERSON. We see Anakin sort-of fall apart over thinking he's not a good Jedi once in AOTC after the Tusken massacre, and then once in ROTS over murdering Dooku, so we know that being "a good Jedi" matters to him to some degree. If he isn't a good Jedi, then what's left? He's wrapped his entire identity and self worth around being a Jedi in a lot of ways, it's part of why he can't just walk away from it in order to be with Padme instead. He HAS to have both.
And by Mustafar, Anakin is fully in delusion land and is just straight-up lying to himself because he's gone beyond a point of no return and he knows it but can't truly ACCEPT IT. Facing Obi-Wan means facing a particular truth about what he's done that he wasn't actually prepared to face (presumably he would've just thought Obi-Was would die along with everyone else and he'd never see Obi-Wan again). But now Obi-Wan is here, this person he'd loved and who had loved him and who he betrayed in the worst possible way, and he has to actually ANSWER FOR WHAT HE'S DONE. So facing Obi-Wan's disapproval also means facing his own guilt, something Anakin never ever wants to do.
So, yeah, I think Obi-Wan's disapproval means a lot all on its own and it doesn't NEED a connection to Shmi to make it mean something to Anakin. I think Obi-Wan's place in his life as a parental figure definitely adds some weight to his opinion, especially in the absence of Shmi herself and Anakin's desire to find a replacement for that relationship in his life, but I don't think that that's the whole or even the main reason why Anakin's reaction to him on Mustafar is the way it is.
#star wars#obi-wan kenobi#anakin skywalker#shmi skywalker#listen i like shmi too#but not everything in anakin's life is necessarily about his mommy issues#also i am v tired and kinda scatterbrained rn due to rl stuff so hopefully this response makes some kind of coherent sense
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Prev post is why I can't fully embrace the "necromancers as a gender" "patriarchal order allegory" side of TLT analysis.
The patriarchy is bullshit based on bullshit. Necromancers have superpowers. Metaphor doesn't hold
#don't get me wrong. I think it's a cool thought exercise or fanfic fodder#and it's interesting to consider how various RL issues may have informed the themes of the series and TM's experiences#but I really chafe at any interpretation that straight up compares necromantic aptitude to gender#or interprets the necromantic order of John's empire as a patriarchy metaphor#fantasy discrimination is inherently NEVER a straight up metaphor for RL discrimination because RL discrimination is based on nothing#likewise. let's keep racial allegories out of it#earth conception of race doesn't impact any character in the series except the canonically brown main antagonist#that's an unfortunate implication#tlt thoughts#elle tlt posting#tlt
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'cause if we dance then, you don't have to speak...
#simblr#ts4 gameplay#oc:ophelia#friend of the animals#dance buddy to this cream bunny#tbh helping out the creature keeper#is my way to deal with my RL issues lol#g:archive
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honestly who among us hasn't pushed the boundaries of medical hazard for the sake of wearing a binder just a bit longer. like when you're running from redcoats through scottish deserts after escaping a slaver ship and you have this tory acquaintance with you and you're not sure how he would react to you having naturals all of a sudden. like you might as well keep it on right
#it's just good sense isn't it#there is this historian whose name I do not remember who suggested that jacobitism was itself a branch of toryism?#sounds very reductive but do you see the issue#rls kidnapped#david balfour#robert louis stevenson
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Meet Zenith.
Some of you may remember this art from a bit back - well, after a bit more rendering and cleanup, I’m calling it finished. What was supposed to be a quick, 30-minute art dragon ended up more like 7+ hours once all was said and done. 🙃 I still like it though, and feel it’s worthy of being offered as an art dragon piece.
Listed on the AH for 1800g, though I’d be happy to take wishlist items (esp. scrolls)
Some character thoughts (though feel free to disregard if you buy!) below the cut:
- Nonbinary (they/she)
- Exists in the highest/furthest reaches of the atmosphere
- Doesn’t need air or normal sustenance - survives via radiation of magic from Sornieth (and/or elsewhere???)
- Glides around, slowly circling the globe like a massive satellite (think albatross for flying, only without the need for wind)
- Despite size and constant presence they very rarely are noticed, unless they want to be
- Potential familiar could be Blackline Bicorn Whale (very matchy!)
#flight rising#fr art#dragon sales#art dragon#Catfeathers Art#trying to draw them has been A Challenge#not only did this get way more involved than intended#I also had delays due to rl stuff#several blue screens of death#(which granted are an ongoing issue but it still was annoying)#THIS POST causing firefox to crash so I had to retype most of it#so tl;dr I hope someone out there enjoys them
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First impressions from Mirage gameplay: they didn’t joke around when they said Basim will be quick. Almost looks like teleportation XD Granted, this particular part - only when he is doing chain assassination
Still pretty fast otherwise. And talkative! Might be the snippet they used, but Basim seems found of thinking aloud
#Assassin's Creed#Basim Ibn Ishaq#Unisoft Forward#Ubisoft Forward spoilers#I guess#Showed more of the djinn too#....It IS creepy#If that is indeed Loki it's closer to how fandom imagines Sages are#Instead of what canon is supposed to be#Codename Jade closed beta was announced too#It does indeed seem to be made for touchscreens#Nexus got a mention too#I don't know what to think about it#Frankly because the guy in VR glasses acted out the motions of assassinations XD#And that can become an issue in RL if you play too hard
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advocating for yourself at work and telling your manager that you're self-certifying for at least a week of sick leave and possibly longer because you need to look after your mental health is something that can be so personal actually
#rl#london calling#unseen academics#i'm so proud of me!#i'll say that for an exasperating manager she was actually very dang good#my sector has so many issues but at least we're good at the whole 'let people take the rest they need' thing#cheer up stuff
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so, a series of events:
our tourettes flares up really bad
our ADHD symptoms suddenly seem to get way worse
we get one of the worst migraines we've had in months that lasts for a week and a half and involved being really shaky and weak all the time
our restless leg syndrome then also flares up
throughout all this the ADHD and tourettes symptoms are still worse than usual
dopamine is either known or thought to be involved in all of these conditions in some way or another, and I'm kind of looking at the fact that they've all flared up at the same time and like, I don't know what to do with this information but hey at least it makes sense that everything's flaring up together and maybe we can use that to judge when stuff will flare up in future if, for example, one of these things gets really bad suddenly
#personal#thoughts#🍬 post#vent post#we're really struggling with this because the worse ADHD is making it harder to do anything#and the combination of RLS and migraine symptoms and tourettes is giving us constant sensory overload so then we have meltdowns#and the meltdowns make the migraines worse and the sensory overload makes everything else worse in a vicious cycle#we've had some kind of illness on top of this too so we've been really fatigued and that's making things worse#and then there's the stress of the holidays on top of all that and stress makes a lot of these issues worse#we're in a very weird state of having way more motivation to do things but no ability to actually start the tasks#and then getting overwhelmed really quickly when we do finally manage to do something#we've got that thing where our moods have been noticeably better overall too but then we randomly have meltdowns and feel awful#by some measures it seems like we're doing amazing but then you look at our overall ability to function and... yeah no we really aren't
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Friends, it is really stinky water coming from under my kitchen sink, and I am not happy. So yeah, no comic this week, not sure about next but I'm hoping it will be fixed. On the up side, this will essentially align tumblr to tapas, so that will be easier to manage. (I could have done without the stinky water, though.)
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Cut my hair. 45 cm less is a lot lighter, feels good.
Due to my sensory issues I left the remaining hair long enough to make a ponytail, because hair getting in my face drives me nuts.
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