#ONE DAY I’LL GET IT RIGHT
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juza & nanami modeling for the fashion students during the university campus festival 📸✨
[ref: 1, 2]
#a3!#a3oc#juza hyodo#oc: nanami#ever arts#details who idk her amdnkskf#went thru the five stages of grief in this one ngl#taylor swift kept me going tho 🤧🤧#juza’s hair was a struggle ESPECIALLY THE PROFILE SHOT#ONE DAY I’LL GET IT RIGHT#also realized late i drew it on the wrong canvas size sjdmdhr but hey homescreen/lockscreen ajdjdje#the right one is probably nanami’s lockscreen for a few days until she gets really flustered about it#godbless the ref pic cause its super them tbh#idk what courses yosei offers but lets pretend oki#back story for this was originally nanami was asked to wear the dress but she panicked over the jinx of wearing a wedding gown#when she wasn’t even getting married so cue a mini freak out#juza seeing this was like i can wear the dress instead and yeah problem solved#but also nanami was like what if i don’t ever get married because of this omg#juza without skipping a beat: i’d marry you#nanami: eh? juza: eh? fashion students: 👁️👄👁️#i had this sketched out since june but just got around it now#also funny considering the theme of aki 10th#ship: 🍰🧋#junami#ever ocs#need to think of a better ship name#‘cause the combination of names wont work well for my other two ocs#junami sounds kinda cute tho…#alt. caption: YOU ARE THE BEST THING THATS EVER BEEN MINE 😫💕✊🏼#We had these like wedding booths during our like school festival back in hs pretty wild
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The most ironic thing about Labor Day is that the wealthiest people with the easiest jobs get the day off while actual working class people still have to go to work and serve all the richies on vacation.
If we actually appreciated labor every fast food restaurant in the country would be closed tomorrow, but instead it’s one of the busiest, most dreaded days of the year for service employees.
#sorry this is super ranty so I’ll just stick the rest in the tags#but#also people are rude af on holidays#it’s like I get that you’re on vacation but guess what?#no one else is#and you don’t get to act like God’s specialist little boy bc it’s your vacation#treat people and the environment you’re vacationing in with respect#Labor Day#workers rights
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today, my coworkers’ refusal to see me as a man put one of our patients in a position where they felt unsafe for the third time. i’ve been at this job for less than two months total. i don’t even care about getting misgendered anymore, i just want the people we’re supposed to be taking care of to feel comfortable around me.
i work at a hospital where we have to supervise our patients in a lot of vulnerable situations. there are safeguarding rules in place for certain things that male employees aren’t allowed to be present for when it comes to female patients. and yet, the people training me and telling me what to do have repeatedly put me in situations where i’ve been forced to do things that the female patients aren’t comfortable with me doing. and because they have repeatedly failed to teach me the rules for doing my job as a man, i have no way of knowing when i’m crossing one of those lines unless one of the patients tells me.
i’ve had to watch a victim of SA stare at me in abject terror as my coworkers asked her to strip naked with me still in the room. it took several minutes for her to even be able to speak enough to ask if i could leave the room. i found out after that she broke down crying the moment i walked out. my biggest regret is that i didn’t realize what was happening fast enough to leave before she ever had to say something, because she shouldn’t have had to say it. i never should’ve been allowed in the room in the first place, because that’s not something male employees are supposed to be present for. but i didn’t know that yet, because i was training and i thought surely, they wouldn’t train me to do something that directly violated their own safeguarding rules. that moment was the first time, and it’s haunted me ever since, but it wasn’t the last time. not only did it happen for the third time today — it almost happened for the fourth, and would have if someone hadn’t spoken up to say they should pick someone else. i care for these people so deeply, it’s why i took this job, and i’m so tired of hearing the fear in their voices when they have to ask me not to do something i never should’ve been told to do.
i’m very used to the personal discomfort of being misgendered. i willingly deal with it a lot at work as well as in other situations, not because i’m in the closet (at this point in my medical transition that would be impossible), but because it’s such a frequent occurrence with my coworkers that we would never get anything done if i took the time to correct them every time. but to see it get to the point of causing such visceral discomfort in other people? people i’m supposed to be taking care of and keeping safe? that’s something else entirely, and i’m fucking exhausted.
and after all of that, some of them still look at me like i have two heads when they tell me what to do and i say “i can’t do that, only female employees can” because i’m learning now. clearly i’m already seen as a man by our patients, but my coworkers would still rather put them in an unsafe situation than just train me as a man.
#to be clear it’s four different things they’ve asked me to do that im not supposed to#as soon as i find out about one rule they ask me to violate a different one that i didn’t know about#i will never ever forget that girl’s face and i’ll never stop being angry for her#for all three of them but especially her#i hate my coworkers for a million different reasons#the patients are the only reason i didn’t quit this job after the first day#i just want to do right by them and sometimes it feels like i’m the only one working there who does#it kills me because the patients who know im trans have been so great about it too#most of them know nothing about trans people but they’re so willing to learn and so respectful and we’ve had such great conversations#they’re getting fucked over by someone else’s transphobia when they themselves don’t have a single transphobic bone in their bodies#i hate this place because i care about the people in it too much to stand by the way it treats them and it’s killing me#transandrophobia#transandromisia#transmisandry#virilmisia#virilphobia#anti transmasculinity#transmascphobia
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OKAY! Chatot rant in tags below! Read at your own discretion.
#okay starting from the beginning of where ppl usually dislike him. apple woods chapter.#he doesn’t give hero/partner the CHANCE to explain themselves despite them being relatively good recruits up until that point.#and that legit might be my only gripe with that chapter bc!!! stories need conflict! I LIKE the conflict in apple woods!!!#hero and partner being punished so something they didn’t do!#the misunderstanding! how team skull (Skuntank) actually outplays the main duo with a clever yet rotten trick. I LOVE that it segways into-#one of the more sweeter scenes of guild members looking out for eachother. I LIKE APPLE WOODS CONFLICT.#but chatot just. not giving them a chance. is so dumb.#I’d personally fix this by having a lil montage of hero/partner fucking up on jobs. A LOT. and chatot giving them a pass every time.#and let the perfect apple incident BE the one where he puts his foot down and doesn’t listen to them. bc he’d given them loads of chances.#and doesn’t want to hear any excuse.#but yeah. I legit dont mind him during that chapter except for that really stupid and frustrating moment.#NOW. CHAPTER 17.#UGGGGHHH WHERE DO I BEGIN#Him not believing hero and Partner about Grovyle and the future being in ruin? FINE. ACTUALLY GOOD. BC CHATOT WOULD BE SKEPTIC.#IT FITS HIS CHARACTER!!#BUT WHAT DOES SUCK. IS HIM GOING ‘Dusknoir isn’t the bad guy. he didn’t do anything wrong’#WHEN HE LITERALLY KIDNAPPED HERO AND PARTNER RIGHT I N F R O N T OF HIM.#(NO LITERALLY. HIS CHARACTER IS IN THE FRONT ROW WHEN IT HAPPENED.)#and him. having the GALL to tell hero and partner they must’ve been ‘seeing things’ and downplaying the HELL they went through.#despite them being missing for hours/days. his own guild recruits. and his angry sprite showing up.#like. I think that’s when I genuinely despised him.#that and him going ‘OH I BELIEVED YOU THE WHOLE TIME HEEHOO :)’ shit was so fucking annoying.#just playing it off as a joke the second the guild started to believe hero and partner.#IMAGINE IF HE W A S ACTUALLY TESTING THE GUILD’S TRUST. SHOWCASING HIM AS THE MORE RESPONSIBLE AND RESPECTFUL RIGHT HAND OF THE GUILD.#and yes. Brine cave he saves hero and partner. but at that point I just didn’t care anymore.#he fucked those two over so much. that I didn’t care what ‘valiant’ sacrifice he had.#and he grills Team Skull for what they did OFF SCREEN. they couldn’t even give us THAT.#<<< THAT or him outright saying sorry would’ve been nice. IKIK his ‘actions’ or whatever but.#eughh again this is all imo. I’m not trying to make people hate him or change their mind.#I’ll get into positives in the second post cause I’m running out of tags
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Day 3 : fashion
Jackalope & dungeon rabbit
"Who are you to Chilchuck Tims?" Smiling softly: "I’m his best friend, his confidante… His silly rabbit." "His… silly rabbit?" "Yes." "Does he call you that?" "No."
I spent way too long rendering this. Coloring Chilchuck’s hair is like painting an autumn landscape and I appreciate that
I love love love brown hares and jackalopes being a Chilchuck thing. Why jackalope specifically it’s more complex bc it’s also tied to my indulgent cultural hc for him but if you want to you can dig through this post for when I talk about why rabbits are so good for him and them. Though now I also associate Rabbit Hole by Deco*27 with them… In my mind they alternate as Miku in that popular animation mv for it, equality for all… Also Zombies but that’s for another day. Also Fashion by Lady Gaga. Also-
They are both flat asses to me. In my heart of hearts
#Dungeon meshi#i saw 1 fanart of Chil in a bunny suit and couldn’t not. Fandom consensus seems to be that chil fans want to see him in one#But marcille fans really don’t want to see her in one soooo#Chilchuck tims#marchil#marchil march 2024#Sorry for keeping being delayed my hubris keeps telling me I’ll be able to post 2 in one day and then failing#I also wanted to do modern au prompt but all my doodles for that one will get posted some other time… Also Chil loves goths send tweet#Shit i forgot#cw#Suggestive#cw suggestive#cw bunny suits???#I’ve seen worse with no community label it’s fine right#Leaving it up to viewer interpretation wether her arm is censoring anything or not#As always i struggle with getting Marcille down right sigh
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It says here you died. Just. Died.
Hypnos is my favorite and he deserves the world.
#hypnos hades#hades game#hades supergiant#hypnos cosplay#cosplay mae#kumoricon#kumoricon 2023#I have had three friends separately tell me they found my picture from the con on Facebook#so thanks!#to the folks who stopped me for pictures!#I promise one day I’ll get the facepaint right
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A Not So Brief Analysis Of Dracule Mihawk
Wondering if Mihawk's distrust of others correlates with the fact he is basically a one-man crew. Wondering just how self-reliable he must've become in order to be self-sufficient. Wondering what is the cause behind it all.
I wonder if, similarly, he has trouble being vulnerable around others. There is an undeniably stoic attribute to his character, but there is a common pitfall practitioners of stoicism (or those who lean towards it) are susceptible to: emotional disregard under the guise of control of emotions, or even worse, reprimanding empathy.
Therefore, could it be the case Mihawk is emotionally detached? It would be easy to draw such a conclusion with what little we’ve been shown of him. While an individualist, he accepts those who come to/at him (Zoro and Perona), and he reaches out to others (Shanks); it might be true that he’d lost interest in Shanks after his injury, but he still committed the sweet act of showing him Luffy’s bounty and apologizing to him upon testing Luffy. There’s also the moment where he tells Perona to take care, upon her departure. So, while aloof, Mihawk is not reserved to the point of stoic cold. He wouldn’t sacrifice company in order to be alone (even if in the case of his pact with Crocodile, there was an utilitarian aspect to the choice; in keeping Perona and Zoro, and in visiting Shanks, there was none other than being nice). One could attribute these acts to an emotional attachment because it does take a drive to complete these very active feats. For Shanks, it could be respect, too. I don’t believe the detached attitude Mihawk possesses would let him take care of those two for two years, especially since he values peace so much; something had to override this desire for peace. I say, the reason could be empathetic in its roots.
Perhaps his self-reliance is misread as distrust? To distrust someone would imply that one is uncertain of their motivations/actions. Mihawk, as someone with Observation Haki, someone who views his enemies with curiosity, who allies himself with whoever is willing to offer him the most peaceful residence… would he be so distrusting? In the little glimpses of his internal monologue we get, there is no distrust and no hesitation. In general, he is confident in his judgement.
But on a more personal level, does he fear his more delicate feelings would be betrayed, if shown too much? There is a possibility for that. We haven’t seen him in such state, as he does rely on himself only. Perhaps Crocodile knows of it. On the flipside, this would imply that Mihawk has a deep, unburied emotional core, one he nurtures and protects – and perhaps one that was taken advantage of. Observation Haki can’t save him from heartbreak, can it? It can sense the emotions of others. It can’t predict his own.
In either case, there very likely is a softer core to the world’s strongest swordsman. Establishing that he isn’t emotionally exempt, but knowing that there’s still a strong individualist quality to him, I wish to look at more of Mihawk’s internal processing.
For an arguably isolated character, he isn't close-minded at all. He possesses curiosity towards his foes; he asks, and he indulges, and he encourages. Think of the entirety of his fight with Zoro.
Then, later on, he is more than anything amused at Zoro’s request. But he obliges. Have the rare panel where he laughs.
When he assesses the strengths of his opponents, he doesn’t do so with any negativity in his mind. Oddly, he goes great lengths to assess them (thinking of his encounter with Luffy). Imagine, it was worth disturbing his peace! Linked here are several reasons why he might’ve done so.
One thing all of these cases have in common is ease. One could argue that it stems from absolute confidence that he is unbeatable, therefore he acts out of boredom, but then again… he trains Zoro because he recognizes valiant traits in him, not because he has nothing better to do. While, yes, there might be some boredom in his life...
Could boredom be Mihawk’s internal motivator? Can we classify his actions as so random/pointless that they serve a sort of entertainment to his otherwise dull living? Personally, I don’t gravitate towards that take. He actively works to preserve his ‘boring’ way of life. For a man so unimpressed, he isn’t trying to change himself at all – nor his routine, not much – in order to appease any need for excitement. The only time he expresses he feels excitement is when trouble heads his way. He does not seek it. Therefore, I presume he is content with the way things are. Quiet.
How does one pinpoint and rationalize these very complex stances? It could be summarized as the opposite of what Mihawk told Zoro.
Could it be that the world’s strongest swordsman became one for he hasn’t developed himself merely in swordsmanship, but in wisdom of living as well? For his domain extends beyond the puddle. There’s an excellent post on Reddit that details the reference this entire phrase comes from, related to Zen.
In addition, I like that during training, Mihawk hasn’t pushed any ideologies or mantras on Zoro, beyond that of basic swordsmanship honor and shame. As far as we know, of course, but I argue such a lesson would be explicitly stated due to its importance. Anyway, these two do not have that moment. Mihawk gets closest to it with his ‘frog’ comment.
It could be assumed that, in not pushing any creed on Zoro (but that to expand his views), Mihawk is leaving room for Zoro to know himself beyond swordsmanship, while also respecting his dream.
Taking into account this ideological emptiness, the ‘frog’ comment, and Mihawk’s general disposition: confidence, ease, peace, I argue that they all stem from the fact Mihawk has found his place in life and has achieved his dream, doing it his way. Now, his current goal of sorts is to be outbested in terms of swordsmanship, a goal he is willing to help Zoro with.
And there is such honor and beauty to it! To sacrifice the goal of his life to help another person achieve theirs. Just how much at peace with themself would one have to be, to be able to give away so much of themself? It's mindblowing. Being able to dynamically balance so many internal and external factors (achieving a dream certainly isn't enough to teach or in any way emulate that; it takes vast wisdom to do so) to finally reach that stage of contentment: to let another have it, at the cost of your own, on a basis entirely factual and wholly fulfilling. It's once again reminiscent of stoicism, and its postulate that a life well-lived is one lived in accordance to nature. One lived in moderation. Now, Mihawk doesn't seem to be very emotionally expressive, does he?
In the aggressive tug-of-war that is the One Piece world, he remains steady, firm on his feet. He knows where he stands, and he’s where he wants to be.
Deeply in tune with himself like that, it could be interpreted that Mihawk has reached a state akin to ataraxia (Greek, meaning freedom of trouble or anxiety; tranquility of mind dependent on the mind), a viable path to one’s happiness as regarded in stoicism. Related, I find it very enjoyable that he is a character who has achieved his dream. Because one must ask: what comes after the dream is achieved? For Mihawk, there is simple contentment. Nothing ‘great’ after he’s reached his grand dream. Farming, napping, cooking, drinking wine, reading? How humble! Not much to indulge in, but he is fulfilled.
And so, his trail continues, he is aware of that, but he doesn’t chase happiness down it. And even if it gets rough and he has to deviate a little, he is on the right path. He knows it, and feels it. That's all that matters.
As Seneca said, “It is not that virtue is chosen because it pleases, but that, if chosen, it also pleases.” Mihawk delved into the wisdom of living, then chose his spot back in his own puddle, still occasionally gazing beyond it.
How exactly did Mihawk come to this mindset? Now that is mental work I reckon he deserves rest from.
#I am not too confident because I’ve known him for little over a week now#I’m also under the influence of alcohol a tad#so excuse my possibly wrong takes#I simply needed to yell about this man…#if I get him right#and if I get Shanks right one day#maybe I’ll write mishanks someday HAHA#dracule mihawk#mihawk#one piece#op#one piece live action#opla#zoro#dracule mihawk analysis#mihawk analysis
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Ngl, really missing Tin Can Tuesgays right now
#tinlightenment#tin can bros#tin can brothers#tcb#tin can tuesgay#like idk they were fun#All the streams were#I miss the silly community made just from those chats#I wish I could’ve made it to more of the streams sadly I was busy right as they were going on normally#It’s been like what? A month since it ended?#Wow a whole damn month#SPY ANOTHER DAY IS THIS MONTH :0#I can’t wait for that idk#Yall know I’ll lose my mind when I get the digital ticket#I think that’s gonna be the only one I buy a digital ticket to#I’m gonna try and see tcbob live though so those are gonna be the ones I see#sorry i’m rambling#Whoops
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Realized I never posted this here! Toboggan is one of my favorite G3’s, I drew this last year and was finally able to get my hands on an in-box toy of her this summer ;w;
#my little pony#mlp#g3#toboggan#fanart#I think this year I’ll draw marshmellow coco cause she’s like my dream g3 right now lol#one day I’ll get my hands on the g2 kitchen sweetberry
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so do yall think dnp aren’t gonna upload until Easter
#I’m gonna have two loonnngggg days at work tomorrow and Thursday#I would love a video one of those days#but I’ll take what I can get lol beggars can’t be choosers right#dnp#dan and phil
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i won’t hold people to the same standards i have on myself in terms of friendship bc everyone shows they care in different ways
#this is a part affirmation and part intro to a rant i need to unleash#but i’ll leave it in the tags here bc it feels safer lol#it’s abt my housemate the other day when we had our last class which is online but our previous classes were in person so as a class we#usually just pull it up on the main computer and broadcast the zoom in the classroom#but on this day the class before this zoom class got out early so lots of people went home early to just watch it on their own zoom or wtvr#so the row i sit in was pretty empty except for me my housemate and our two friends#and usually my housemate sits on my right but she got up and moved to sit on the other side next to our other friend and said nothing#and i didn’t want to say anything bc i was kinda sad/offended even though#her moving seats probably has nothing to do with me and much rather her personal preference i can’t help but think negatively abt myself#also one morning we were both off she went to the smoothie shop and coffee shop and just went to pick up her orders and i felt the same#reaction of like sad/offended bc she didn’t consider me at al like what if i wanted a smoothie too! TF#or coffee even though i don’t drink coffee anymore wtvr#my thoughts on her and my friendship are kinda rocky bc we feel so out of sync#i feel like she’s always in her own world and it’s hard to get through to her and become real friends#it’s whatever not all friendships can be deep and meaningful
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“Ah- apologies, Stanley, that was intended to be Blood. It appears my Blood and Glow Stick Juice textures have been swapped, an honest mistake really. Sigh you’ll have to wait for your proper blood bath. My sincerest apologies, Stanley.”
Wanted to cover him in blood then I started messing with the colors and uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh thought it was pretty :3
#tsp#the stanley parable#the stanley parable ultra deluxe#tspud#maybe it’s blood in the Detroit become human universe#but that’s not a game we have availability to right now#anyway I’m posting this instead of the#like 4? TikTok’s I made#I’ll get to those later#I still want my one 8:30 post a day limit#so if everything went to plan#you should be seeing this 2 days into the future#and have 1 TikTok reposted currently#the others will come eventually#probably as bumpers between other posts#anyway I’m off topic#the bucket says ‘blood for Stanley’ btw#if you even care#.png
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a sleepy washington for today. really getting back into tradart lately :)))
#his design is so simple yet so hard to pin down 😭😭😭#one of these days i’ll get it right maybe#rvb wash#david washington#rvb#red vs blue#rvb fanart#fanart#art#drawing#artists on tumblr#artist#tradart
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He’s so real
#la by night#jasper heartwood#one of these days I’ll get a pin on how i draw him okay#also yes there was inconsistency on which half of his face got burned but u know what i swear it was implied to be the right side first#vtm art#potentially art#traditional art#vampire the masquerade#nosferatu
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pallas in book one is definitely at it-cannot-possibly-get-worse-than-this ABSOLUTE rock bottom but god. there is such a specific flavour to their despair in book two that only happens because of the realization they have at the end of lay me down. like. how do you move on after admitting that everything you believed in was a lie. how do you live with what you’ve done (with what has been done to you). is it possible to pull yourself up out of the pit you’ve dug. what do you do if it isn’t. what do you do if it IS. and once you look at the damage how do you stop looking. past the first layer of hurt there’s just more and more hurt and you were used by the one person who was supposed to keep you safe to cause even MORE pain and no matter how deep you go none of it means anything! it never meant anything at all!! motherfucker your worst sin is that you have destroyed and betrayed yourself for NOTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
#pallas’s whole arc in the first book is getting to the point where they go ‘maybe i? feel bad about all this?? actually???’#i cannot overstate enough that it takes an entire book to get them to that point lmao#and then it’s like. newsflash buddy now you’ve gotta DEAL with that#it really is the mental equivalent of getting into a hot bath of after being out in the cold for a whole day#and the interesting thing about pallas in the first book and their status as a villian and like. their eventual ‘oh SHIT’ moment#is that pallas doesn’t need to realize that they’re a bad person doing bad things#pallas is VERY aware that they are a bad person doing bad things#it’s actually more about realizing the harm that’s been done to them? like as a human being??#bc they very much have the attitude of ‘well of course i’m doing bad things i was born as an inherently evil person there’s nothing else#i’m capable of doing the most i can hope for is that someone points me in the right direction and i’ll be able to do the hard things#that other people cannot (and SHOULD NOT) do’#so THATS the mindset that needs to be unlearned before they can start moving forward? if that makes sense?#less ‘shit are we the baddies?’ and more ‘shit have i been horrifically abused?’#but then after that realization all the blood they’ve spilled is still there. and they should never have had to do that. no one should ever#have to do that. but they did and now they’re starting to see the full extent of what that means#and they have to find a way to live with it.#and it’s absolutely DEVASTATING.#wip: ghost story#pallas#i’ve been working on the book two outline. if you couldn’t tell. head in absolute hands rn.
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people tell me I’m attractive but then I go on tinder and get like 5 likes in a town of 150,000 people
nobody I like maches with me I legit want to throw myself into the dirt and become a full time potato
#just gunna starve myself#bad girl#like wtf#maybe someone will one day notice me#or I’ll get someone I like who likes me back#but right now potato#rotting
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