#Like I genuinely love putting large amount of info into characters
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I love my OCs passionately but like no one usually cares about them which is fine as they are mine and I love them dearly.
Like these are 2 of them
I love them dearly as they came from my mind :)
#Like I genuinely love putting large amount of info into characters#I think it's why I really like having ttrpg characters now#people will listen and like the detail and it makes me very happy#I do feel very guilty about info dumping so I don't do it as much as I could but like still#My friend endo is an amazing person for allowing me to infodump for like half an hour
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hey I'm trying to get into podcasts and I'm intrigued by your posts. what are your recs?
THANK YOU FOR ASKING! So like, knowing nothing about your personal taste, I’ve given you a long list of shows I like, separated by vibe more so than genre. I’ve bolded my faves and put an asterisk by the ones I’d recommend starting out with if you like the sound of the premise, and I’ve also flagged which ones are Queer Podcasts and which ones have fandoms, given that we’re on the queer fandom website. Also there are SO MANY of these and I know there are some huge ones I’ve forgotten to include lmao. It’s very much intended as a menu depending on what you personally enjoy in media! Feel free to follow up with more info and I can put together a more tailored list.
Good ones to start off with, not too intense (incl some comedies) -
*Mockery Manor: The production values on this are INSANE. It’s sort of an 80s teen horror movie, based around a bunch of 18 year olds working in a theme park for their summer job, but Something Is Afoot! It’s incredibly fun, the voice acting and sound design are amazing, and it’s made me crack up laughing on the tube. There are 2 seasons so far and I really really rate it. There’s at least one queer character.
*Wooden Overcoats: Comedy drama about two rival undertakers trying to do business on an extremely small island in the English Channel. A good one to start out with as it’s not too long, but it’s exceptionally funny – the writing is excellent but the actors’ comedic timing and tone really sells it. Starts out very silly but there are lots of heartwarming moments and some genuine drama. Several queer characters and there’s a very fun little fandom.
*Girl in Space: Scifi drama about a scientist living on an increasingly dysfunctional spaceship. Starts out as just her diary, and develops into an ensemble cast ft ACTION, REVOLUTION and THE POWER OF FRIENDSHIP. It’s well-produced and quite short (~13 episodes). The main character is very likeable and it’s fun to listen to. It’s a good intro to the format if the premise is your cup of tea.
The Ballad of Anne & Mary: Not a typical podcast so I guess perhaps not the best intro to the medium, but it’s extremely good and I think it’s a great example of what can be done with the audio medium when you create a show with its strengths in mind, rather than when people just have a thing they want to do and figured a podcast would be the cheapest and easiest way. It’s very short (like 5 30-minute episodes) and it’s a musical! It’s a take on the story of Anne Bonny and Mary Read, and it blew my tits clean off the first time I listened to it. It’s one of my favourite musicals, I immediately bought the MP3 soundtrack and pretty sure I know it word for word, and it’s an impressive cast – the male lead is played by the London actor for Alexander Hamilton, for example. The songs, sound design, acting and writing are all beautiful and it’s so well-put-together. I really can’t recommend this enough. It’s also v queer. Gay pirates, getchyour lovely gay pirates here, fresh out the oven! Same creators as Mockery Manor.
*Monstrous Agonies: Performed as a late-night ‘agony aunt’ style radio show for the supernatural community. Very funny and well thought-out, with some genuinely good advice, and the presenter has probably the world’s most calming and beautiful voice. Develops a plot but I don’t want to spoil it for you! Queer, I think there’s a fandom but I’m actually not entirely up to date so I haven’t looked into it yet.
More serious / horror:
*The Magnus Archives: Starts off as a horror anthology with the connecting thread being that the individual stories are being read by a narrator who works in Spooky Research (TM), and then develops a plot around the individual stories and the Spooky Researchers (TM) over the course of 5 seasons. Many of the individual stories are extremely well-written and the sheer amount of them is really impressive, and because the bulk of each episode is largely a stand-alone story, it’s a good one to start off with if you’re new to podcasts despite the length of the series. It’s a lot queerer than you would expect from the first season, and there was an enormous fandom which has produced some stunning work (and some equally stunning discourse); since the ending of the show it’s quietened down a lot which is the way I like it personally. MY BLORBO GOES HERE.
I Am In Eskew: Starts off single-narrator and then drawing in other characters and a plot. The narrator describes his experience in a sort of alternate universe where Things Are Not Right, and again, it gradually introduces a plot. This one’s more focused on the horror element really, and it’s very good at creating an immersive listening experience.
Mabel: Dark fantasy drama. Really poetic, well-acted, really good at suspense. A cool take on changeling/fae mythology. Very intense and maybe not one to de-stress to, but definitely worth a listen. It’s very queer, there’s some neat fan content for it but less of a fandom.
In Strange Woods: Another musical! This one’s about grief, trauma, and how small and powerless humans are compared to nature. Really, really good. You’ll cry. It’s a quick listen – 5 episodes, all less than an hour long. When I listened to it, there was some kind of glitch with the audio that meant sometimes bits of scenes were missing or played twice? I think that was just my podcast app though. Hades from Hadestown is in this one!
The Silt Verses: Horror drama. Starts off following two members of a cult dedicated to an outlawed god, in a world where gods and the power of belief play sort of a similar role to corporations/the economy in our society. People get sacrificed to them a lot and it’s just how the world works, there are agencies dedicated to inventing new gods, etc. I’m really impressed by how they’ve built that worldbuilding and lore, as narrated by characters who have never known any other world, without ever losing the horror element. Really well-performed. Queer but it’s not a primary element of the show. I think there is a fandom but people in the tag kept massively missing the entire point of the show so I actively disengaged from it lol.
Alice Isn’t Dead: Really well-written, acted and produced. Follows a lorry driver searching for her wife, who she thought was dead, and encountering various spooky situations along the way. It’s very immersive and does creepy very well.
Harlem Queen: Drama set in the Harlem Renaissance. Another serious one, and deals explicitly with heavy issues including racism and violence, without much reprieve in the form of soft moments or humour. But it’s very well-made and worth a listen, and there’s not a lot of it.
Fun listens, often a bit surreal (similar genre to the first section but for various reasons I might be less inclined to recommend them as your intro to the medium)
Welcome to Night Vale: You’ll almost definitely have heard of this. It’s a radio show from a very surreal desert community, which again, slowly develops a plot. It’s good and it’s very fun to listen to, but at this stage there are so many episodes, I maybe wouldn’t recommend planning to listen all the way through in one go lol, but you also can’t really start it massively out of order. I’d say this is one to start from the start, but take your time listening. Iconic queer podcast, used to have a huge fandom, I think a lot of people have sort of moved on from it, but there’s still a lot of great content and a lot of affection for it.
Victoriocity: Drama/comedy set in an alternate universe London. Feels very Discworld – really inventive worldbuilding, fun twisty plot, political intrigue, hilarious deadpan narrator, great acting. There’s some cast crossover with Wooden Overcoats so if you enjoy that you’ll like this one too.
Caravan: Western/fantasy which I wouldn’t classify as a comedy per se, but it’s still frequently very funny. Great acting, very fun and relatable protagonist who just keeps on choosing compassion over violence. Thoughtful coverage of mental illness, being brown and queer, and sexy vampires. 18+ but not super smutty and has content warnings.
Oblivity: Sci-fi drama comedy, very funny, very found family. You’ll be surprised how much you care about the characters given how stupid it is. The primary viewpoint character epitomises bisexual disaster.
The Prickwillow Papers: Fantasy drama about a young half-elf who’s just graduated from Wizard School, moved back in with her parents while she tries to find a job, and ends up taking care of the most cantankerous fae you’ve ever encountered (I love her). Lots of fun and incredible voice acting. Deals with the difficulty of letting yourself be helped, coping with guilt, and not being ‘special’. I think the show is abandoned unfortunately but still very worth listening to.
Love And Luck: Queer Australian slice-of-life audio drama comprised of a series of voice mails between two guys, following them through when they first start dating to becoming a hub for their local community. It’s very sweet and all about the importance of community and taking care of each other. Also magic brain powers.
Unseen: A series of urban fantasy stories, some connected and some not, most with a single narrator, and varying in tone. The premise is that magic is real and exists in ‘our’ world, but just below the surface and invisible to people who don’t have magic. Really well-written and well-performed. There’s one that’s based on Jeeves & Wooster but make it gayer and also magic, and I think about it a lot.
Greater Boston: Drama more than comedy but also deeply funny. Lots of apparently separate stories converging, clever writing (really good at giving a massive cast of characters distinct personalities), really emotionally impactful coverage of topics like grief, racial inequality, addiction, classism and more, doesn’t try to give easy answers but is also very focused on community power and optimism. Also there are cheese robots. Lots of queer characters. Really good but because of the complexity and the massive size of the cast, I wouldn’t necessarily recommend starting out with this one.
Doctor Who Redacted: An official BBC-produced Doctor Who spinoff podcast! Primarily recommending this to Doctor Who fans, you don’t need to be super familiar (I’m not a big Doctor Who fan personally) but a baseline understanding would help lol. The premise is that everyone who has interacted with The Doctor is being erased from history, The Doctor is trapped elsewhere and unable to help, and three queer women who do a terrible conspiracy theory podcast about ‘The Blue Box’ are quickly becoming the universe’s only hope because anyone better-equipped to help is being systematically deleted. It’s fun, very queer and feels very real, and has a lot of really touching moments.
We Fix Space Junk: Sci-fi drama comedy, very anticapitalist, queer, big found family feelings. Lots of fun, job-of-the-week episodic format makes it a relatively low-focus thing, even when the stakes are high it feels very safe to listen to, and the characters are v likeable (even the ones you really wouldn’t have expected).
Midnight Burger: Surreal sci-fi drama comedy, set in a time-travelling multidimensional roadside diner staffed by a set of lovable weirdos. Two of the weirdos live in a radio. Also the show is now about revolution. There are a few things I’m a bit :/ about it on, but it’s a very fun listen and the cast of characters are incredibly likeable.
Death By Dying: Dark surreal drama about an obituary writer and the bizarre town he lives in, with the initial plot being moved along by him meeting the niece of one of his writing subjects and her quest to find out the truth about her aunt’s death. I don’t know if I’d call it a comedy per se but it’s very funny. Deals with grief and mental illness pretty prominently, but in a very reassuring way.
Gather The Suspects: Murder mystery set in a slightly alternative universe version of Wales where they’ve seceded from the UK and also possibly the apocalypse is happening? It’s very funny, and follows two roommates and their neighbour trying to solve the murder of another neighbour from their apartment complex. It’s in English but it’s still very Welsh.
The Amelia Project: Drama/comedy about an agency that helps people fake their deaths. Great voice acting, very fun, and I really enjoy how international it is. Uses the episodic ‘client of the week’ format in combination with big picture plot in a really engaging way. Feels a bit Leverage-y especially because of how clever/absurd the plans are.
Actual play podcasts (i.e. Critical Role style, people play a collaborative storytelling game together - I don’t listen to a ton of actual plays because I don’t have the attention span, I know there are others not on this list which are very popular)
Campaign Podcast: Improv comedians play a TTRPG and chaos predictably ensues. There’s two campaigns, Star Wars (which is Star Wars) and Skyjacks (set in an invented world focusing on skyship pirates and heavily influenced by The Decemberists). The two campaigns have very different vibes, the first is mostly just goofy (though occasionally gets very real), the second is a lot more expansive, more heavily edited, and more drama-oriented I would say. I love both, they’re very funny and in particular a couple of the players are amazing. Lots of queer characters in both and a very fun fandom.
*Chapter and Multiverse: this is a very new show, but it’s GMed by Maddy Searle (who wrote and performed The Prickwillow Papers mentioned above) so I can wholeheartedly recommend it. It includes a ‘main’ arc, currently following a group of young superheroes, interspersed with one-off games (typically sillier) which feature a broader rotating cast of players, many of whom you will recognise from other shows on this list. Because it’s so new it’s a great place to start, and there’s already a very productive fan community since so many people involved have already developed a following from other shows.
Rogue Runners: based on the Hades game and set in that universe. Features a cast of shades including a teenage girl, Alexander the Great, a very horny assassin, and an elderly Scandinavian bartender not sure what he’s doing in the Greek afterlife, all trying to escape the underworld and return to the mortal realm. Very funny, extremely queer, and I was really impressed by how the GM (Tau Zaman, who also created the Caravan podcast rec’d above) adapted the typical D20 system to really replicate the feel of Hades.
Realms of Peril and Glory: like Chapter and Multiverse, it’s an assortment of RPGs played by a rotating cast of people within the (primarily UK-based) podcasting/audio drama community – Maddy and Pip are big fixtures in both podcasts. I haven’t listened to all of it, but the main campaign, Vael, is very funny and full of heart, and the comedic timing on some of these guys is absolutely impeccable. I also really enjoyed their Nibiru and high school horror games, and they’ve got one coming out using Thirsty Sword Lesbians very soon, which I’m personally looking forward to a lot.
The Adventure Zone: to be honest I’m not still listening to this, but I reckon it has to be included just for the influence it’s had on the genre of audio-format actual-plays. If you’ve somehow not come across it, the idea is that a set of brothers who have a popular comedy talk podcast play D&D with their dad, and their first campaign starts out as a very standard D&D plot arc and is quickly derailed by them goofing off and the very patient GM brother weaving it into a narrative which will punch you in the heart. I really enjoyed the Balance and Amnesty arcs; the Balance arc in particular was incredibly popular. It has a lot of queer characters and I’m confident there’s still a fandom, though it’s not as dominant as it was for a while.
Non-fiction (i.e. what 90% of the people you meet off Tumblr think ‘podcasts’ means – I don’t listen to a ton of non-fiction but figured worth including)
*No Such Thing As A Fish: A bunch of researchers from the show QI get together, each share their favourite bizarre fact of the week, and discuss. Informative and very fun. One of the UK’s most-listened podcasts so don’t just take my word for it.
Bad Gays: Discussion podcast about ‘evil and complicated’ queer historical figures. Ft nuanced discussion and some very cool Facts.
Hey Riddle Riddle: Improv comedians (one of whom is in Campaign Podcast, mentioned above) plus occasional guests attempt to solve riddles, mostly do improv scenes.
Bill Buds: Improv comedians (both in Campaign Podcast) discuss a different pop album each week, going through song-by-song with a quick clip from each. They don’t really know anything about pop music. This is one I listen to when I want something on in the background while working/getting to sleep. I enjoy the enthusiasm and the total lack of knowledge, and given that I’m not a big pop music fan, it’s also a good way of finding music I’d like to listen to. However, I probably mostly like it because I enjoy the hosts on their RPG podcast, I don’t know if it has any appeal to people who aren’t familiar with them from that.
Cautionary Tales: Narrator tells you about fuckups from history, and explains the psychological factors that made each of them possible and what we can learn from them.
Ipsos Views: I’m sorry to end on a corporate podcast rec, but if you’re at all into psychology/sociology this (and Ipsos’ various other podcasts) are an interesting listen. Ipsos if you’re not familiar do a lot of polling and market research in the UK, which they’re commissioned to do by other organisations, so they have an enormous amount of insight into trends in what people are thinking, saying, and doing (which don’t all necessarily overlap). I haven’t listened to every episode, I just scroll through and pick out the ones that interest me or are relevant to my work, but so far they’ve all been pretty good. Because it’s corporate though, I would just say, y’know, take it with a pinch of salt lol.
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A somewhat lukewarm review of Amongst Our Weapons (I’m sorry)
Firstoff I want to say that I had a great time reading this book, I had a lot of fun, some things were genuinely exciting, but the longer I’ve sat with the story the less I like it.
A lot of the character moments I genuinely loved, especially spending more time with Seawoll (though that is straying very close into the territory of him dying soon), my queen Miriam, I enyojed Peter and Danni together, and it was nice revisiting Caroline and getting a glimpse of what Lesley's been up to (and I do have to say, go off girl, do what makes you happy). But even while reading I noticed that those moments were the only thing keeping me interested in the story, and even then a lot of the development Peter and Nightingale have seems forced. It felt like I was watching them drift apart, and while I am happy that Nightingale is looking to return to the thibgs that make him happy, it also means that the thing I find most engaging about the series, the relationship between Peter and Nightingale, is going to be sacrificed for this. Similarly it does not feel like Peter is ready to take over the responsibility BA is trying to push on him, and even now it feels that Beverley and the twins are a device to push him into that direction and nothing more. The Peter/Bev relationship has been around for five books now, and I still do not understand why they are a couple, and while there were some sweet moments in between there just is no spark there, and it seems the only reason this exists is to show that Peter is no longer really a part of the Folly, and I’m afraid that this is only going to get worse as the books continue. I genuinely hate that we are explicitly told that Peter no longer spends time at the Folly if it isn’t necessary for work, and it seems out of character for Nightingale to insist that Peter take over the Folly considering he doesn't seem to care about it anymore. (And his wish to leave London to go back to Casterbrook is honestly not a good sign for his mental health, lets be honest with ourselves there)
This might all come down to the fact that I don’t think BA has quite figured out what his plan for the series is. Both Amongst Our Weapons and False Value have felt like filler books to me, to stall some time and cramp in a lot of worldbuilding until we can move on to the next overarching plot, whether that be Lesley in earnest or another villain. And while I quite like the worldbuilding he does, it comes at the expanse of the pacing, and takes time away from elements that felt extremely rushed. (Considering they are his children I had expected them to be born earlier than in the last ten pages of the book). In general the plot felt like several pieces lacklusterly put together, and deviding the novel into days didn’t work here as well as it did in Whispers Underground, and the trip to Manchester felt like a different story altogether and as if the driving force of the plot in London was paused so Peter could take a trip and get infodumped on the Sons of Weyland, who ultimately didn’t have large enough of a role to really justify moving the plot up to Manchester for them (yes, I know BA had to introduce them somehow, but there must have been a way to do that more organically), to then go back to London and get infodumped on the Spanish Inquisition. I just feel that if the Manchester plotline had been cut, or the entire book had been set in Manchester, and the Inquisition aspect had been introduced earlier we could have gotten the same amount of information without it feeling as info dumpey as it does
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Writeblr Introduction
Hi hello hey how ya doing! My name is Remington and I'm a new writeblr, I just want to share my stories somewhere other than my friends DMs asfdhakdk
I write mostly fantasy and adventure type stuff, and a lot of the things I write are coping stuffs because we got mental illnes luv x
Other Places To Find Me
my main blog is @rarewubbox (you'll find my carrd there as well if you want more info about me!)
my art blog is @c0ttonberries
my AO3 is ToTheMax
Current Wips Under Da Cut (because this got long)
No Name, Fair Game- a story about a boy named Colt-Lynx who runs away from home, meets a cute girl named DeLaney, and they go riding on a train to escape his old life. DeLaney isn't everything she claims to be, however, but Colt-Lynx doesn't seem to notice. The only people that can tell that something is off is the quartet of strange humanoids that they've acquainted themselves with on the train. Full of Drama, Fantasy, and of course the recommended amount of Gay
LOVE–LOVE- a High School Romance story between tennis players on rival teams. Lee is the charismatic yet forgetful heartthrob, and Cliff is the pessimistic yet caring stuffed animal doctor. When their schools agree to have an after-school program dedicated to preaching good sportsmanship, the teams have no choice but to get together and mingle. Lee and Cliff start to realize that they don't mind each others company, despite being supposed rivals. This is just gay high schoolers in love what else do you want from me
Infamous Weapons 101 [title might change]- This is another high school story about a group of juniors who decide the adults aren't going to do anything about their dangerous school system, which encourages burnout, coming to school sick, and- worst of all- coming to school while there's a serial killer at large. These kids have to put their personal squabbles and family drama aside, because now lies a threat that only they seem to care about dispatching, and they can only do this together. This is planned to become a webcomic to be a social commentary on the American school system and all of its fatal flaws, with a wide variety of humanoid and animal characters. There's angels, demons, furries, zombie dogs, and everything in between!
Chërophobia- Chëro is a doll that came to life after being thrown into a dumpster for the millionth time. He wanders into the forest and meets a ghost, who brings him to the wonderful lightshow of Meinstro and Family's Bright-And-Wild Circus! There, he finds a home and people genuinely worth caring for, who won't chuck him in the trash. The only problem is... he's caught up in the family drama now. It turns out the ringleader of this circus he cares about has to carry her parent's burden and answer for their crimes against other circus families around town. This WIP can be summed up as "if I had a nickel for every time I met a family who ran a slaughterhouse disguised as a circus in the woods, I'd have... three nickels. Which isn't a lot but its horrifying that I've met three of them." Oh yeah did I mention the circus is a slaughterhouse? Thats kind of important. I'm writing this with a good and close friend of mine and we've been working on the story for a good long while now!
I also have a smattering of other fics and ocs so I might post about those later but here's my Main Writings!
No Better Version Of Me; a Henry Stickmin Fanfic- this is the only fic I'm putting up here bc its the only one I'm actively publishing lmao. It takes place after The Revenged ending in Henry Stickmin: Completing the Mission. I'll refrain from spoilers but there's DRAMA, ACTION, and MAYBE ROMANCE BUT NOT A LOT OF IT. I have my own separate blog for this fic here @nbvom
[CURRENTLY UNNAMED]- A boarding school far away from any neighboring society finds themselves in trouble when students and teachers alike start turning up dead on the courtyard. They'd call the police, but the phone lines are cut. They'd e-mail for help, but something is trapping their signal. Three assumed targets of this unknown killer are placed under a rudimentary bodyguard program, so now these rowdy music majors are going to have to coexist with the prim, proper and intimidatingly dark students of their Academia majors. (Everything about this is still under heavy development but I've had this idea for like literal years)
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A Primer/Refresher on Me
Hello! I haven’t been using Tumblr much recently, and I know I picked up some new followers since starting to post Critical Role drabbles. So here’s a little bit of information on me and my primary fandom stuff.
RL Info: She/her/hers, mid-30s, Librarian/Archivist, living in the Mid-Atlantic USA, married, and mom to a beautiful, amazing little girl (born mid-2019).
Fandoms I Write In: Mass Effect, Dragon Age, Person of Interest, Critical Role.
The Critical Role Thing You Might Know Me From: Parallels, where I thought about, er, parallels between C1 and C2 characters that weren’t just comparisons between the same player’s characters. Note that I wrote this relatively early in C2 - aka in the Molly era, where a lot of secrets had yet to be revealed.
Long-Term Writing Projects: I have a bunch of WIPs, but the ones that I’m most likely to continue are my two Mass Effect Giant Crossovers of Doom.
No More Gallifreys: Mass Effect x Doctor Who (2005). Main characters: Female Shepard and the 11th Doctor. Eleven joins the Normandy mid-ME2; clashes with Shepard at first, makes friends with Mordin and Tali, and learns a surprising truth about himself and his connection to the ME universe.
In retrospect, large-scale crossover was not a great choice for my first foray into fanfic, and I got discouraged for a while - but there was a moment recently where I genuinely wanted to continue, so I ended the 2.5 year gap by resolving one cliffhanger and introducing a far less dramatic one.
Exodus Into Fire: Mass Effect x Battlestar Galactica (2003). Main character: Kara “Starbuck” Thrace; secondary important characters: Female Shepard, William Adama, Sharon “Athena” Agathon, Galen Tyrol, and likely others as the story goes along. The Earth that Starbuck guides Galactica to mid-S4 turns out to be Shepard’s Earth at the beginning of ME3. With Earth not the safe haven they'd hoped for, a multi-species conflict raging around them, and the enemy Cylons still a threat, the Colonial Fleet and their Cylon allies struggle to make a place for themselves in this new universe.
At one point, I’d intended to complete No More Gallifreys before starting this one. Hah. There’s an alternate universe where I had the Mass Effect romance be Male Shepard/Tali instead of Shakarian. Female Shepard was a main character at the start, but Starbuck is now the linchpin. I learned from my previous mistakes and chucked ME canon out the airlock sooner, or kept it offscreen if it wasn’t changed by the presence of BSG characters. I’m determined to fit a crossover romance in there somewhere, besides Starbuck hooking up with Septimus Oraka at Afterlife (why? Because she could).
Fandom Exchanges: After creating an excessive amount of spreadsheets for them, @acequeenking asked me to help moderate the two Bioware Rare Pair exchanges that she started - Spectre Requisitions (Mass Effect) and Black Emporium (Dragon Age). Running these two exchanges has turned me into a serious multi-shipper, and I have fun with both of them every year.
Doing those two also inspired me to create the Exchange of Interest for Person of Interest. This one’s for any and all POI relationships. I love this show so much - the lore is amazing and incredibly detailed, and it has some seriously badass characters that are easily some of my favorites ever. I’m grateful to @livenudebigfoot for co-running with me and look forward to Year 4 in Spring 2021!
Stand-Alone Works: Because of the aforementioned exchange participation, I’ve written a LOT of stand-alone ‘shippy stories in the past few years. Here’s a highlighted one from each canon.
What kind of woman doesn’t have an axe? (ME) - Female Shepard/Aria, with FemShep being basically an expy of Rosa from Brooklyn 99. Set during the Omega DLC for ME3.
Acceptance (DA) - Male Inquisitor/Vivienne, soulmate AU which is really more of a character study of Vivienne (who gets way too much hate).
Straight into the late night (POI) - Carter/Zoe/Shaw; as my recipient put it, Three Women Fix Things Then Make-Out.
So What’s Next?: Another round of Spectre Requisitions starting shortly after the new year; and hopefully more progress soon on my Giant Crossovers (I say that every time. Sometimes it’s true.)
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NorRayEmma Tangled AU!
Things are a little different from the original Tangled. If curious, plot and character info are below the cut~
- James Ratri is the King of Neverland. He was the one that spent day and night trying to find a magic flower to give to his sick Queen, Owl Minerva. Isabella, the most loyal and trusted of the guards was ordered to stay by his wife side, protecting her until James and the other guards came back with the magic flower.
- When the baby was born the royal family was faced with a shocking pair of red eyes, the intense color the exact shade of the magic flower. The baby, named Willian Minerva in honor of the queen survival, had absorbed some of the flower magic, for his eyes glowed in the dark and his tears had the capacity to heal.
- The king’s brother, Peter, is the one that kidnapped the prince. He initially tried to take the baby’s eyes and keep them as a substitute for the magic flower but the moment the eye disconnected from the baby head the magic was lost, the bright red turning sky blue. Peter managed to put the eye back later but the prince was left with a scar on his left eye. When he sings only the right eye glow brighter, and the few times he cried only the tears on the right hold the power to heal.
-Isabella died trying to protect Norman from Peter, considering her friend’s son a child of her own. She managed to gravely hurt the traitor leg and abdomen before kicking the bucket but unfortunately, Peter used the baby’s tears to heal himself completely.
- After the tragedy was over, everyone mourned the death of Isabella and the betrayal of Peter. The king ordered his guards to look left and right for his son, hoping to have hope restored. Peter was paranoic about the large search, so he moved to an isolated tower and changed Willian’s name to Norman.
- Norman loves to read and write. Peter gifted him books to keep him busy and entertained, unintentionally invested on the boy. All their meaningful conversations are about books and while Peter doesn’t mind the boy hobbies he still makes sure to only bring books where humanity is described as a horrible species. Ones where people with magic don’t get a happy ending.
-Norman dreams of going out and explore the world but he is wary of it. Listening to his father’s warnings and seeing how dangerous his situation is. If even the man who loved him dearly was practically obsessed with his magic, he doesn’t want to know what strangers would do to make him cry. He hasn’t given up on his dreams however so he learned how to control his tears. Words and stones will hurt him, but they can’t make him cry. Peter find this very troublesome, but thankfully a song is still enough to light up Norman’s eye and cure any fatigue, making him young again.
-Peter convinces Norman there are traps around the tower so he shouldn’t ever leave, it’s far too dangerous for a little kid! It takes time but Norman reluctantly agrees, getting more and more skeptical as the years go by.
- Ray, left with no parents after Isabella’s death, was adopted by the queen and king, both wanting their dear friend son to have a good life.
-Ray grew up in a place were everyone sung his dead mother praises. He had memories of warm gazes from both his biological mom and adoptive parents but he knew the king wanted his true kid back. He completely understood them, so he never attempted to study to be a king, waiting for the true heir to come back and fill in this hole his existence couldn’t.
-Ray is determined to be a royal guard, promising himself he would be strong, strong enough to prevent any possible tragedies from destroying his adoptive family again. He starts training to be a guard, a soldier. He grew to be the best in the castle, and while his dad is very proud, he knows Isabella used to be even better. Ray doesn’t mind his colleges' disappointment, he is well aware he cannot fill the hole Isabella’s death caused either, but he is scared he too will fail when his family needs him most.
- Emma works on an orphanage, has been living and helping around the place for all her life. Said orphanage is very poor so she collects fruits in the forest and steals bread and milk for the small children. She steals very little from a wide variety of locations, not wanting to actually prejudice any family. Most of the time people don't even see her, but other times she gets in fights.
- One day, she gets in a bad fight, probably would have died if a tired guard in training hasn't stopped the commotion, forcing her to return the food and giving two breads of his own to appease her yelling stomach. She said her thanks but the guard waved her off.
- Times passes, her usual targets start to get wary so she is forced to expand her territory. Emma isn't sure where she should target until she sees a huge amount of sweets get delivered to the castle and decides to steals it for her little sister birthday. It’s not that hard to sneak past all the lazy guards and she always gets tasty rewards! So she keeps coming back.
- Despite not going much to the kitchen, Ray scary memory is enough to make him notice the foods and little items that Emma stole. He keeps his eyes open for any cheeky cook or skillful thief, eventually spotting Emma with a slice of his favorite cake. He recognizes her as the thief he saved a while back but he is so annoyed he almost cuts her hand off. Emma also recognize him but she decides to gets the hell away from the castle, apologizing "I didn't knew it was your birthday cake!! I am sorry!" and crying dramatically. Ragged looks and terrible diet aside, she proved herself to be far quicker than Ray, maneuvering pass him and promising to make it up too him.
-The next day there is a homemade cookie in his window with a badly written 'happy birthday' in it. It’s the cheap, no chocolate or honey kind of cookie, terrible when compared to the rich cakes he always get but...Not that bad... Ray half expect it to be poisoned but it's clearly not... He doesn't know what to make of it.
-She keeps coming, making sure to not get greedy and only picking the easy stuff. It’s a game. Ray tries his best to catch her but doesn't actually grab her when he has the opportunity. She started to like their interaction, teasing the boy and considering him her friend. Ray reluctantly think she is okay too and leave food by the window once or twice, smiling on the rare occasions another of those horribles cookies are placed in his window. Queen Owl and King James notice their interactions but pretend to be ignorant, happy Ray got a friend.
- This strange friendship they have it’s wonderful, or it was until Emma stole the prince crown.
-It was a tough choice. She felt bad for the King and Queen, silently apologizing to Ray too, but not giving the crown back. The prince probably won’t come back anyway and with this crown, she’ll get enough money to make sure her broken down orphanage, her home, doesn’t get demolished for a stupid shoe store.
- Ray runs after her, this time truly angry. That was the only thing left from the prince! His parents will be heartbroken! He orders the other guards to surround the city orphanages while he searchs for the girl, willing to play dirty if it came to it.
-After a lot of running, Emma finds the tower Norman is kept and decides to hide in there. Ray discovers the tower too and follows Emma, ready to threaten her with her siblings' safety in exchange for the crown. He doesn't expect to see the thief unconscious while a beautiful boy with a thick encyclopedia tucked under his arms drag her under a bed. Ray warily raises his sword, surprised by how much Norman resembles his dad, from the unusual white hair to the blue eye...It was identical to the king.
- Norman has a bad opinion of guards, trusting his books and convinced they hunt down magic people and torture them. But he also knows they’re very good at fighting and can be good shields, perfect to help him cross the supposed traps around the tower. So he hides his fear and acts relieved to see the boy in armor, stating he was hiding from thieves. When asked about his scarred eye Norman made up a story about thieves using violence to get his money, the cut was so deep he couldn’t save his left eye, so he used a substitute.
-Ray know something isn’t quite right with Norman’s story, in fact, he is pretty sure the boy, this younger version of James, is the missing ‘cute angel with red eyes’ his adoptive parents talk all the time about.
-When asked about the missing prince Norman looks genuinely confused, trying to hide behind a little smile and stating his dad Peter never talked about this missing prince.
-Peter hum? That’s either a very strange stream of coincidences or Ray just found the missing prince. That’s the only reason he accepts to escort this very suspicious ‘Norman’ to the city, trading Emma unconscious body (crown included) in return for his service as an escort. The guard ties Emma up and they both leave the tower, keeping an eye on each other. It may look harmless, but Ray knows Norman can do a lot of damage with the encyclopedia he insisted on taking with him.
-Norman tries to act neutral and focus only on finding traps but he doesn’t quite manage. His eyes light up in wonder over everything, spending a little too long rubbing his feet on the grass and trailing his fingers over tree barks. Ray just slowed down whenever Norman took a detour, finding it oddly adorable to see this boy that exude grace discreetly grab dirt from the ground and mumble “Fascinating...” when the dirt rocks dissolve into sand. It’s strange. Underneath his fondness, Ray can’t help but feel sad. If even dirt amazes Norman, he truly must have never left his tower in the 16 years the prince was kidnapped...
- It doesn’t take long for Norman to notice his father lied, there are no traps around the tower. It takes even less time to see Ray may suffer from resting bitch face syndrome but he is pretty nice. So Norman tries to actually speak with Ray, ask about his job and Emma situation. It’s a pleasant but mostly quiet conversation where Ray explains his routine in an unenthusiastic tone and Norman feel increasingly more fascinated by the outside world, feeling betrayed by his books and his father.
- Ray let him touch his hair and examine his armor. It's nice...And it only gets better when Emma wakes up.
- She whines about her situation for a full minute, glaring and getting in a loud argument with Ray before feeling someone touch her hair antenna. If she wasn't tied down, she would have jumped, finally noticing an amused Norman by her side and then proceeding to gasp "You are the one that knocked me down aren't you??".
#time passes but i still love this au#the promised neverland#tpn emma#tpn ray#tpn norman#norray#rayemma#long post#norrayemma#inevitable grammar errors#noremmaray#mari draws
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The Good Place full series review
How many episodes pass the Bechdel test?
96% (forty-eight of fifty).
What is the average percentage of female characters with names and lines for the full series?
49%
How many episodes have a cast that is at least 40% female?
Forty-four.
How many episodes have a cast that is at least 50% female?
Twenty-eight.
How many episodes have a cast that is less than 20% female?
Zero.
Positive Content Status:
Good - you might even say, strong - in the sense that it’s all there, pretty much all of the big representation bells are ringing, particularly the ones for women and racial diversity. That said, the show is generally content to sit pretty and not push the envelope on inclusivity, so if you’re looking for inspiration in-text instead of just in casting, you might be disappointed. At any rate, it’s a solid feel-good time, and not likely to make you mad (average rating of 3.01).
Which season had the best representation statistics overall?
The numbers stay pretty consistent across the whole series, but if I had to call a winner, it’s season four, which has the highest percentage of female characters and the only above-average positive content rating (though that was awarded somewhat cumulatively, and so doesn’t feel particularly well-earned by that season above the others).
Which season had the worst representation statistics overall?
It’s such a close call, but season three must be the loser here by virtue of the lowest ratio of female to male characters; it also had one of the series’ two Bechdel fails. Like I said, it’s...a really close call.
Overall Series Quality:
There’s so much about it that is fresh and original and interesting, I wish I could love it more. After a magnificent debut season, the show suffers immensely for a lack of pacing and the absence of coherently-planned plot, and at times the stagnating characterisation and pointless filler caked into the cracks in the storytelling can be frustrating and/or tedious. I’m only as disappointed as I am because the potential for greatness was so strong. That said, even at it’s worst The Good Place is still entertaining, and most of it is better than that. It’s irreverent, it’s fun, it’s surprising, and sometimes it’s even as poignant as it is remarkable. I have my gripes, in droves, but that doesn’t mean this show is not worthy.
MORE INFO (and potential spoilers) under the cut:
Imagine. Imagine a version of this show where the first season is basically the same, and the second season is...somewhat similar to how it is, but with more focus and direction, less time-wasting; a second season where figuring out that some fundamental change to their circumstances is necessary comes early, and instead of faffing about with ethical lessons in the fake neighbourhood again while Michael pretends he can get everyone to the Good Place, we get down to business with going on the run and into the Bad Place to find the judge and petition for help. Imagine this show, but the third season has none of that return to Earth crap, and instead, is the neighbourhood experiment from season four, properly fleshed out. And then season four is all about going to the Good Place and solving the problems there, addressing issues with the concept of utopia and the ineffectual bureaucracy of obsessive niceness (used for comedic effect in the actual show, but c’mon, there’s a whole untapped reservoir about morality there). Each season could have (gasp!) a properly-planned and plotted arc, dealing with a different school of ethical considerations, and I dunno, maybe the characterisation could have trajectory too, and the characters could vitally shape the storytelling, and maybe not get their personalities and experiences erased and rebooted over and over again, nullifying large swathes of the narrative which came before? Ideally, they could be reset zero (0) times, or at least have all their reboot experiences dumped back into them in the first few episodes of season two, so that they could proceed from there as whole people. Rebooting everyone’s personalities is not actually necessary to the plot in any way, and is, actually, incredibly detrimental to storytelling and especially, character development. Imagine this show, but just chilling out and actually telling a coherent story?
I am all the more annoyed by how things turned out on this show because I know that the four seasons were planned for, rather than being the result of cancellation; the idea that the creators sat down and ‘plotted’ (using that term loosely) to make this mess drives me a little wild. The (attempted) avoidance of the dreaded ‘stagnation’ seems obvious, and it leads to major narrative shortcuts and jumps and instances where the show spends an episode or two on what should have been a half-season’s development, minimum, and yet at other times all momentum grinds to a halt for a bizarre bottle-type episode where the characters just talk about a concept for a while or work on some unimportant romantic subplot. The various ethical concepts that the show heavily incorporated as its bread and butter in the first season start to stick out like sore thumbs in season two, seemingly wedged into one episode or another for no real reason other than just to be there, and the fact that the show lets go of the idea of moral choices in the life mattering at all in the end leaves the backbone of the show in a very strange shape. I said in the season four review that I didn’t expect the show to come up with some One True Answer about how people should live their lives, but that I was baffled by the fact that the show side-stepped that altogether; what I expected them to conclude was something in the line of ‘we recognise that life is complicated, not all situations are created equal, and it can be hard to know how to proceed ethically or even to access ethical options within one’s circumstances. Still, it is important to do your best, not only for yourself but for your community, because the more good you put into the world, the more there will be to go around and come back to you. What matters most is that you are doing your best with what you’ve got’. The fact that the show distracted itself with fixing how the afterlife rewards people within the afterlife means that it suggests no incentive to perform moral actions in life, and frankly...who gives a fuck? The real world is the place we’re all living in, and there’s no point starting a conversation about morality in real life if the conclusion is just ‘guess we’ll straighten out all the fascists and bigots and the other pieces of shit after they die, so don’t worry, everyone gets to Heaven eventually!’
Anyway, if that seems like just a reiteration of what I said in the season four review, well. I’m still baffled by it. The other thing I was going to talk about in the season four review but held for the full series instead was that one big thing that I have railed about all the time since season one, and that’s PACING. For all ye wannabe-writers out there, please understand how important pacing is. Even vital plot or character beats can seem like meaningless filler in a poorly-paced story, because your audience’s mind is hardwired to try and follow narrative cues that are being incomprehensibly muddled. Standard structure can be played with, but if you toss it out in favour of ‘stuff just happens, ok? Except when it doesn’t’, you just end up with a soup of disconnected story ideas, and nothing threading it together. Character interactions and especially developments can help to create the through-line you need to keep the story functioning despite itself, but as variously noted with The Good Place...initial characterisation? Strong, excellent. Development? Not so much, not least because they kept getting deleted and rebooted. Also, time skips kept happening, and that’s a great way to fuck over your narrative coherence even more: remove the recognisable constant we call time! It’ll be fine! As with all things, it is perfectly possible to play around with this stuff, but you have to know what you’re doing and be doing it for a good reason, and that’s not what they had going on here. This was narrative soup, and when you have a soup, the pieces all kinda meld together and lose any individual purpose, meaning, or power they may have had. The result in this case was not bad, but it really could have been so much better, and literally all it needed for that was some attention being paid to the story structure via pacing.
So. The good news is, I think I have pretty well exhausted all of my complaints by now, and that leaves us with the good stuff, of which there was no paltry amount. The show was not a hit by accident (even if I do feel that it’s success had a lot to do with people sticking around after the spectacular first season, and not because it stayed strong throughout), and even if there was a lot of soup going on, what comprised that soup was all really fun and unique, and this made for a wonderful piece of light-hearted television that could be as hilarious as it was insightful. It still had a lot of great takes on things, the commentary was strong (even if it pulled all its punches towards the end), and whether the storytelling was ebbing or flowing, it was always delightful. The show also managed to pull a miraculous finale out of its hat, and that’s a rare thing in television; however the story wobbled over the course, the ending provided enough satisfaction to forgive just about any sins, especially if you don’t happen to have been watching with a deliberately critical eye. Do I wish that Eleanor got to hook up with a chick on-screen some time instead of just making a lot of bi remarks? Yes. Do I consider the show to have queerbaited instead of providing genuine rep? No. Is the underselling of the queer content my most significant representation complaint? Yes, it is, and that's good news considering the world we live in and the dearth of quality representation that the industry has brought us to expect.
There's an important distinction to be made there, regarding the tokenistic representation that is very common these days in tv trying for brownie points and good publicity, exactly that kind of 'political' inclusivity that conservatives are always bitching about. It should not be surprising that I support that tokenism over the alternative of having no representation at all, but it can still be quite disheartening to feel like your identity or the identities that you value are being referenced as nothing more than an opportunity for some shitty producer to perform wokeness for attention, praise, and the almighty dollar. I bring this up because - even though The Good Place never really worked up much of a boost to its content rating - one thing I felt that it did really, really right was providing representation without it feeling tokenistic at all. Eleanor's bisexuality wasn't as prominent as I might have preferred, and as noted through the course of the show, there were times I feared it was more bait than real rep, but reflecting on it at the end, the way it was included feels organic, it never gets in the way in order to ensure the audience notices and is dutifully impressed. The number of women around and the multicoloured casting plays out even better; I never once felt cynical about the gender balance I was seeing, and I've said it before but I'll say it again: the fact that the show was packed with names from across the world gives me so much life. I'm still a little salty about Chidi's Senegalese origins getting the shaft (and we won't talk about 'Australia'), but the nonchalant diversity of naming goes such a long way to embracing the idea that this is a world for everyone (and an afterlife for everyone, too). And where anything else might fall apart or lose its way, that is an affirming thing. If you want feel-good tv, it’s here. This is the Good Place.
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Do you think we're ever again going to hear from Hero of Ferelden or even see them on screen? I mean ik that Bioware said it is tough, because in many cases HoF is dead (ultimate sacrifice thingy) but... Leliana could be dead too, and here she is, standing proud as Inquisition's spymaster - pretty big role for a dead woman. Lyrium spirit you say... Same question about our old companions from DAO and DA2. Well, except Wynne I guess. 😅
Under a cut for length. TN spoilers under cut.
Hello, sorry, I know it is a popular wish but I don’t think we will see the HoF on-screen again :[ The HoF’s story is long-over, both in-universe and irl, and they led 2 whole games and a host of DLC. Compounding this, as you say they can be dead and BioWare have said something along the lines of how bringing them back would be tough and that it’s unlikely. It would be a lot harder to bring back the HoF compared to the lesser challenge bringing back Hawke in DAI was, due to the larger amount of base variables (3 different races as an example, no set voice) and the lack of easily-defined personality (like red or purple). In addition, even with the lower amount of variables involved, the implementation of Hawke in DAI for a large section of the fandom went down like a lead balloon. There were opinions and complaints that Hawke was OOC - for example, genuinely amazing as it was to see Hawke again, my blood mage Hawke went on nonsensical rants about hating blood mages and I was like huh? BW will have seen that sort of response and how it got a bit messy and taken it on-board. If the Inquisitor will return as an NPC like Hawke did in DAI (which is most likely out of the three previous PCs, owing to the obvious Solas connection), I imagine they already have their hands full with this. The other thing to keep in mind is that Hawke could not die in DA2. Hawke was alive in all worldstates. In quite a lot of universes, the Warden is dead. another thing is that around 2017 Laidlaw tweeted that the HoF was never going to feature in any of their products again. ofc things can change in the years since and he has left, but that was a fairly strong statement.
Hearing from them via letter or in dialogue references I think is possible, more likely and way easier to implement. Saying that, even then - the HoF’s story has been concluded and tied off. If they survived Origins, they traveled west on their quest for a cure for the calling. We can tell from romanced Leliana’s Trespasser epilogues that they have at the very least returned (I don’t see why only Lelimance Wardens would have). It’s not clear but from them I also assume that they found a cure.
I know that other main characters such as Leliana could be dead but were brought back, but I don’t see them repeating that trope for a big-name character again. After a few times it becomes over-used and cheapens the deaths that supposedly occurred. It also has the potential to get messy. How many lyrium ghost people or “surprise! this character who died in game actually survived!”s are we supposed to accept before the premise becomes silly, over-used and immersion-breaking, you know?
About the old DAO and DA2 companions, I mean… that’s a big question, especially if you’re asking “will we see them on-screen” and “will we hear from them again” about each of them. We could easily hear from any of them from among the ones who still live, especially if they bring back receiving letters and a war table-esque type game mechanic.
Alistair, Morrigan, Leliana, Warden Loghain and Oghren have already been seen again in big ways in a subsequent game. His smaller amount of re-appearance content is a sore point for a lot of folk, but Zevran appeared again in DA2. Dog is a no. Wynne is dead. Morrigan might be brought back if they go for the “Flemythal isn’t really dead” or “Flemythal pushed her godhood through the mirror to Morrigan” or “Morrigan has advice on how to deal with this new threat” angles, or if they choose to delve into an end outcome for the person who drank from the Well. Leliana could feasibly be seen again if she’s Divine. If she’s not Divine she might appear as the Inquisition-remains’ Spymaster, although it really depends on the time that has elapsed because she’s clearly been grooming and preparing successors for that role. Whether she’s still a direct part of the “Inquisition’s generals” depends on the specific timeframe I expect.
They leaned quite hard into fleshing out and making prominent-once-again the Crows in TN. There’s a bit of potential there for Zevran to reappear, but I can’t tell how much of that is wishful thinking/reaching. The last time we saw and heard from him he didn’t exactly hold the Crows in high regards (more idle reaching/rambling on the Zevran question here, ctrl-F “Zevran”, TN spoilers at link). Sten is the Arishok in most universes. The Qunari Antaam invasion seems like it’s going to be a big plot point or at the very least a major backdrop/context to the next game. Whether we encounter him I think will depend on what’s going on with the hinted schisms in the Qun, whether it was he that ordered the Antaam to invade, etc. Some more thoughts on the Sten thing here (TN spoilers at link). It would be cool if we (well, us in a meta sense) ended up meeting him on the battlefield or something like he foretold years ago in DAO, or if we could have a meeting with him to try and propose peace or allying to try and defeat Solas or something. Shale… iirc some endings of DAO have her heading for Tevinter, but she was followed up on in Asunder, and was DLC only. I had originally thought she might be a good shout to tap, but that isn’t the case anymore since Solas is confirmed to be able to freeze even golems, and TN also makes a point of hinting at the existence of other intelligent/sentient golems.
Re: the possible return of DA2 companions I have less thoughts, and tbh I don’t really see a need in most cases. Many of them can be dead. Anders in particular can be dead, as in shanked in the back as a story decision cinematic from Hawke-dead rather than just “fought against Hawke after disagreeing with them at the end and ‘died’ at the time” (the latter could be story/gameplay segregation). Aveline has a role and steady job to do in Kirkwall. I don’t know why Prince Sebastian would leave Starkhaven and he’s been back in comics. The siblings can be dead. Bela was already back in comics and DAI. Varric’s done his time as a companion in 2 main games, although I can certainly see us getting reports/info/jobs from him, in the form of letters sent from the Viscount of Kirkwall. Merrill would be interesting to see and might be able to help us given that she’s an expert on eluvians. I would also like to hear what she thinks of the Dread Wolf being a Thing, you know? Find out where she stands on that, if it’s impacted her world view, would she support him or not, etc. Fenris has obviously been moved on the chessboard to Tevinter, putting him in the local area. I could see encountering him as the Blue Wraith in game, perhaps working for or with him a bit or getting a quest or two from him, but I don’t envision him as a DA4 companion. It’s also important to remember that the comics are not supposed to be nor designed to act as a prologue for DA4, like it’s not a direct-set-up situation (see the notes on the podcast mentioned towards the end here).
NB I love these characters! Please don’t interpret this post as not liking them.
[msg refs this post]
#dragon age 4#the dread wolf rises#dragon age#bioware#video games#tevinter nights#tevinter nights spoilers#tevinter nights spoiler#spoilers#spoiler#alistair theirin#fav warden#morrigan#queen of my heart#solas#fenris#the fenaissance#mj replies#anonymous#logan hawke
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Jolene Soriano, FASA 2020-21 Co-Social Chair
Oh, hey FASA, didn’t see you there. It’s me, one of your co-social chairs this year, Jolene. You’re probably wondering how I ended up here. My story begins in a small town in the west side of Michigan where I had no real ties to my culture other than whatever my mom decided to cook up for dinner and the functions my parents had with the very few other Filipinos in Holland. I grew up always feeling a little out of place and always feeling the need to hide my culture from my friend group. When it came to my junior and senior year of high school, one of the biggest factors for me in deciding where to go for college was wanting to be in an environment where I could comfortably express myself and my culture. With that being said, I put in a deposit for Grand Valley State University, another predominantly white school. Not to bash on that school or anything, it’s a good school, it’s just I would’ve had a repeat of my high school days. Obviously, I did not end up going to GVSU and I ended up changing my mind and submitted my deposit for the University of Michigan the day before deposits were due. The biggest reason why I ended up changing my decision was because of the opportunities available at Michigan, that I couldn’t get anywhere else. One of these opportunities being FASA. So, when I got to Michigan, I waddled up to the table at Festifall, got info for their mass meeting, sat in on the mass meeting, ate some Insomnia Cookies, and ended up committing a large amount of time to the org.
For those of you who met me last year, you may know that at the first few events I ever went to I spoke a total of maybe five words. So you might be wondering how this literally silent person wound up as social chair, a position that requires speaking maybe more than five words. For this, you’ll have to thank Aber John Espinoza. I know I make fun of him kind of frequently (every chance I get), but I do genuinely have to thank him for providing a space in his Modern Tinik sets for me to finally get comfortable and start opening up to people. AJ’s naturally friendly and sociable personality allowed me, an unbearably shy individual, to start forging the bonds and friendships I have now. He was the one to kickstart whatever “sociable” nature I have in FASA. When I ran for social chair, the main thing I wanted to accomplish was creating a space similar to the 8PM to 10PM Modern Tinik practices in all of my social events and initiatives. I wanted to make sure everyone, new or old, had a place where they could express themselves and open up safely and start making those friendships in FASA that really will last a lifetime. Hopefully, that was something I was able to accomplish during my time in this position.
modern tinik origin story s/o aj (black shirt in the back set of sticks)
Social chair was not exactly what I had expected, granted COVID did not help anything. The ideas I had originally envisioned were no longer feasible, and online events were the only thing that my co-chair Jason and I could do. After our first few online events in June with Independence Day Spirit Week, I disliked hosting online events. At first, the events felt awkward, there were lag issues, the list went on. However, we pushed ourselves to think outside of the box and committed to making these social events fun, even if they were virtual. It was not easy to say the least. We didn’t have anyone to ask about how to make an online event “fun” since no one’s ever had to pull one off, and even if we did have ideas that we wanted to do, they weren’t exactly always feasible online. Nonetheless, we were committed to making these events as fun as possible and the result of that were literally hundreds of meetings and thousands of hours spent over the course of the year. You may think I’m exaggerating that time, but honestly I don’t think I am. Not only were we busy with these events, we were also launching the first ever year long FAM competition-- POTTER. This initiative had its own set of challenges from making the rules, the scoreboard, points, keeping in communication with FAM heads, the list goes on and on. We juggled our events, POTTER, and all the other board responsibilities that were asked of us.
welcomed the weekend with the best people
You could maybe say that we were a bit ambitious in our goals for our tenure, which might have caused us more stress than if we had just stuck to the traditional social events done. There could be some truth in that statement. I mean, we didn’t have to put in that level of effort into our events or into POTTER. But it would also be literally so embarrassing if we were that org and just did something basic like Kahoot at every social event. More importantly though, especially in the times of a panoramic and isolation, maintaining friendships and being social is crucial to one’s well-being. This is one of the main reasons why we worked especially hard. Although there were many instances where I questioned why I was putting in so much effort or allowing myself to incur so much stress, I feel rewarded at the end of the day. When I look back on the year and the things I’ve accomplished, I feel proud that I was able to do all the things I wanted and more. It also makes me feel good that I might’ve been able to create the same space AJ made for me. I would say that whatever stress or negative emotions I felt during my time on board was worth it.
FASA board has provided me with many invaluable experiences I wouldn’t trade for the world, from the countless midnight parties, boardie hangouts, stressful weeks and events, and meeting so many amazing people. FASA board has pushed me out of my comfort zone in a good way, forcing my introverted self to initiate conversations with awkward freshmen trying to navigate their way through their first year and leading zoom calls filled with many people. I’ve also learned the importance of teamwork, collaboration, and asking for help. It’s so easy to think “this is my event, so I have to do this on my own,” but in reality that’s just making more work for yourself. I’ve never been a part of a team that has worked so closely together, and I am so grateful I had the opportunity to have been supported by an amazing cast of characters.
charlie ft. trad #charlie supremacy
Ok, so this is the part where I’m going to go through a list of thank yous and messages to certain individuals. To Board, I don’t think there are enough thank you’s in the world to express the gratitude for you all. You all have been there for me whenever I’ve needed it the most and helped me throughout all the tough times this year. You all are smashing individuals and I wouldn’t have wanted to work with anyone else this year. To AJ, thank you for being the foundation of my time in FASA. I don’t think you realize just how much your existence has impacted my journey in FASA and on board and without you I don’t think I would have had the experience I’ve had if it wasn’t for you. I will dearly miss you when you inevitably graduate and I will try to continue your legacy of making FASA a safe space for everyone. Ok, I think that it’s for all the sappy words for you we’ll go back to our regularly scheduled programming of roasting AJ. To Sean Herrera and Bea Fandino, thank you for being the boardie boomers I could always go to. I will always be grateful for Midnight Party being the thing that brought us all closer together and started a friendship that no one saw coming. Also, sorry for all the random and questionable texts I’ve sent at odd hours of the night, but I hope you were able to get some entertainment out of it. To Kristina Mallabo, thank you for always entertaining my shenanigans and driving me to Fuller when I don’t want to walk 20 minutes. You truly have become one of my best friends and I wouldn’t trade you for the world (except for my anime boys but that’s to be expected). Hmmm… I think that’s all for my messages and thank yous… LOL just kidding how could I ever forget to thank the one person who’s kept me sane throughout this entire year… Park Jimin <3
KIDDING! I’M KIDDING! The last person I’d like to talk about in this testimonial is none other than Jason Portugal. A somewhat unlikely friendship born from the 8PM to 10PM Modern Tinik practices and late night Victor’s Pushes at Mojo. Mr. Portugal has been one of my closest friends since I joined FASA, and I don’t think there was another person I would’ve wanted to run for social chair with. I was really lucky to have one of my best friends as my co-chair and go through thick and thin with him. I genuinely do not believe I would’ve been able to make it through this year without Jason. I would like to thank him for making all of the late night meetings, stress, and countless hours bearable, for all the laughs, memories, and shenanigans, and for being someone I can be vulnerable with. I don’t think I could envision a life without Jason Portugal and he is a pillar of my life that I could not go without. Thank you, Jason, for everything you’ve done for me this year and for working together with me to accomplish the things we’ve done. We did it.
putting the “jj” in “jjk” (we love you kris)
Before I wrap this testimonial up, I’d like to write a message for next year’s socials. This board position is a lot of work, but I assure you that if you truly love what you’re doing, it’ll all be worth it in the end. I don’t think I can stress the importance of having fun with what you’re doing. You can’t expect general members at your event to have fun, if you’re not also having fun. The energy you give is the energy you’ll receive. Also, be sure to rely on your co-chair! You don’t have to be best friends or anything, but they are with you for your entire tenure and you go through so much together. Be sure to always keep in constant communication with each other! My wish for whoever carries on the social chair legacy is that they are passionate about instilling a welcome and safe space at every social event.
With that being said, I’ve come to the conclusion of this testimonial. I will miss working with everyone on board, contributing to FASA’s community through social events, and turning visions of event ideas into reality. I will not miss spamming the GroupMe with all of my announcement messages though. I’m looking forward to what next year’s board brings and am excited to participate in social events rather than planning them! Thank you FASA for allowing me to provide you with hopefully fun social events and activities this year. FASA has become such a large part of my life and I could not imagine my life without it. Maraming Salamat from the bottom of my heart.
<3 you all are the best
See you around FASA!:)
Jolene Soriano
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okay here’s what i remember from THE CON
i can’t remember if the ticket was cheap or pricey. i don’t know why. i wanna say it was more expensive or of equal value to a bigger con and i justified it to my parents and myself because it was the first one. but i went because i thought the idea of a con that was centered on the various fandoms popular on this site at the time was a genuinely neat idea. i also thought, okay let me just go because it’s another one to attend.
i should note: that have been to a lot conventions in my time. i’ve been to acen twice i think? i’ve been to nebkon twice. sadly i have never been to c2e2 or flashback chicago (which i may never get to go to now whoops) and i’ve been to wizard world chicago i wanna say 4 times?
now at these cons (mostly wizard world) these fandoms aren’t as present. in fact, the main demo of that con was adult to middle age to older visitors as well as families, so usually teens and young adults would find each other at this con (whether planned ahead or by accident there) and freak the fuck out over our cosplays or mutual love of whatever.
so because of this again the idea of a t.umblr con was exciting to me, even though i was already at the end of being interested in those fandoms (as i’m sure most people were at the time)
okay so first, this con was far. wizard world and acen are held at the rosemont convention center which while kind of far from where i live, is accessible by train via downtown or via one of chicago’s big airports. i always got a ride though which with summer traffic, took forever. so much like that this con was a journey away.
the hotel the con choose i remember thinking it seemed new, but it was far from where i lived which inpacted the amount of time i spent at the con and the decision to only go two days (i didn’t return the last day because it was a shit show)
i went to this con by myself because i think at this point i had already had a falling out with my friend who i went to cons in the area with (she did not attend that i know of). i wore two cosplays that i had made already for other things, gwen stacy and america chavez. this would have been the ideal place for me to cosplay something more niche, but i just didn’t care that much about it. maybe i didn’t think it was worth it at the time since it wasn’t going to be a big con.
so i get there and there’s no long line to get my badge in fact i don’t even remember a line at all. which, for me, was bizarre. every con i’ve been to before had huge lines even on off hours to get badges. but whatever. i cant remember if where i got my badge was in the the same room as where the ball pit was or not. but yes, i did go into the ball pit and i was silly in it with some other people because
idk you see a ball pit you go in the ball pit? in hindsight i know it’s not acceptable to have this at a con, but shit i guess i was high on life at the time. someone took a pic of me in the pit, but i have never seen it.
i remember seeing some very impressive cosplays at this con. i also bought some really great art in the dealers room which was small. (here’s the artist. also this was nonfandom art. i don’t remember buying anything else from anyone because i don’t think i saw anything i liked/could afford) there was no unlicensed night vale merch sold here that i remember, but i do remember receiving free unlicsenced night vale like pamphlets from a random vendor and also there was a vendor who was giving away a large piece of night vale fan art with a purchase of over something dollars i dont remember.
panels: i don’t remember there being many panels or even very interesting panels. panels i remember going to include: bisexuality in media/bisexuality representation (which was put on by the bisexualbooks tumblr), ask an avenger (which was put on by various marvel cosplayers), and a panel that was about female characters in supernatural (i was a spn stan back in the day jsyk).
the bi one was good. i remember it being the most like a panel that you’d go to at a larger convention. they had slides and info and they took questions and had several speakers.
the avengers one was what we’d call today “cringey” but it was cute. it was exactly what it sounds like. avengers cosplayers sat up on a stage answering questions in character. i believe that all the cosplayers had rp and/or ask blogs which is why they were chosen.
the supernatural panel was, like the bi one, complete with slides and various speakers, but from what i remember it was mostly going down the list of female characters in the show. i remember from the fandom that there a good chunk of people who love the characters, but they’re often killed off or abandoned and this is something a lot of fans did have gripes with. this is gonna sound fake when i say it, but this did happen, we got to charlie and someone said “yeah i like charlie she’s cool because she’s a lesbian but she doesn’t act like one like she’s still feminine” and i spoke up and said “well yeah it’s cool she’s a lesbian, but what do you mean she doesn’t act like one. like queer female character shouldn’t have to be feminine to be seen as good rep.” and people clapped. i know that sounds fake, but please believe me because this is a setting where people are inclined to clap when they agree with statements. people clapped at others too.
i also attended the costume contest, the night vale panel, and the meet and greet with doug jones.
the contest was fine. there was one individual at this con who i can’t name because i didnt know their name, but they cosplayed as ed from edd ed and eddy and they were in character the whole time to the point of discomfort. it wasn’t just for the contest i found myself in a cards against humanity game that they were in and it was even there and it was weird.
then the night vale panel happened and ooooooooohhhh boy
this was the most filled room in the whole con. a main reason i went to this con was to see them and im pretty sure this was everyone’s main reason to go. i known someone from other cons who came from florida to see this. (fun fact: we were mutuals on various platforms and had hung out at various cons and i knew their name, but they could not remember mine and i thought that was bogus so i ghosted them. dont know if i was justified in that but whatever)
so here we all were waiting. for over an hour. during this time people talked and i remember someone cosplaying the glow cloud went up and down the isle with a little glow cloud baby in a stroller and we all laughed and cheered. people started playing card games. we kept busy. for me though.
this was one of the most boring cons i’ve been to honestly. i’m having trouble remember a lot of it and that’s because i went solo. i had no friends there. i cosplayed gwen from like the 60s and this was before spidey joined the mcu and before itsv was a thing so spidey was basically an niche fandom (i was active in the tasm and dane deha.an fandoms at this time and the latter became toxic as fuck but that’s a whole other story) or something older comic fans liked.
my other cosplay was america chavez from young avengers which never got that popular either (though kate bishop and kid loki where more recognized, but for their connection to bigger marvel names). so it wasn’t like other cons where my cosplay was an ice breaker and i could join groups. i was alone.
so a lot of the con for that reason was awkward and waiting for night vale was like being the person texting in the corner at a distant relative’s party because they know no one.
so they finally come on stage to say that night vale will not be performing and people went ballistic people were shouting and the person said “we have doug jones in the next hall you should go over to that” and someone yelled “WE DON’T WANT TO SEE HIM”
i went to see doug jones and i was previously unaware of what his name was but i knew who he was. he talked about his work and acting process and did a meet and greet after. mr. jones was a delight and i’m wondering how they even got him there in the first place. he was leagues above this.
i had to leave the con early that day to go to my brother’s football game, but i believe that was the night they “protested” at the con and i kept seeing on tumblr that it was cancelled. i decided not to go back the next day because i was unsure of what was happening and because it was too far.
and the rest is history. i’m sure i went to other panels, but i can’t remember them. i do remember going into the room where they were watching pacific rim, but it was on a shitty projection screen and i wanted to go to a panel instead.
it’s shitty what happened with the con. and a lot of the unrest came from literal teens who were cheated from money who didn’t know how to act, but all the responsibility goes to the people who organized it poorly. The concept of a tu.mblr con i don’t think should have been inherently bad. i think it would have been cool to have a con that focused on more niche interests. but shouldn’t have been as big as they wanted it to be for the first go.
anyway that’s most of what i can remember. it’s kind of blur because i spent most of it by myself and there wasn’t much to do so i didn’t even spend the whole day there.
quite frankly, i’m glad i wasn’t there when they started singing les mis because i have no idea how i would have acted.
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{Special} College!AU Hanbin
*this post was commissioned | find all my college aus here | commission info
major: electrical engineering
minor: philosophy
clubs: engineering association, secretly attends music club and says that he doesn’t even though junhoe has caught him multiple times
sports: LOL is being on his college’s esport team count? does asking jiwon about his gym routine count?
hanbin is definitely a notable character on campus
he isn’t insanely popular and social like jinhwan or donghyuk - boasting thousands of followers on instagram and being labeled the princes’ of their department
but he’s not a total tech nerd like chanwoo - who keeps crushing poor hanbin at every video game he gets into
but a lot of people do know him
mostly because he’s got resting pissed off face
and nearly half the student body has gotten the wrong impression because of that
the amount of times jinhwan has had to explain to people that no hanbin isn’t glaring at you - he just can’t see very well
or in fact, he actually think you’re pretty cool it’s just,,,,,,,for some reason,,,hanbin never learned to express that very well
actually, hanbin isn’t good at expressing in general
he shifts from focused and hardworking when it comes to his studies, to tired and lazy when it comes to just about anything else
he can get loud when he thinks someone is cheating in overwatch or when someone bothers him in the middle of studying
but a genuine smile,,,,,,,,even after years of friendship jiwon admits he isn’t really sure he’s seen one from hanbin
but that’s not true, because hanbin does smile
especially when he’s embarrassed
and what embarrasses him the most????? love
any mention of relationships, skinship, dates, marriage, lovers - all of it makes hanbin get all awkward and jittery
he once got asked out by a brave freshman in his elective arts class
and got so flustered and unable to answer that instead of answering them he excused himself from the classroom
and did THREE laps around the arts building
dripping paint everywhere because he’d forgotten to set down his brushes when he’d rushed out
whenever he’s asked who his ideal partner is, or who he has a crush on on campus
he always answers with an idol’s name or a video game character
people always lifting an eyebrow because isn’t that a little childish, or is he just avoiding the question?
but he honestly means it - the idea of dating,,,,,,he won’t admit it,,,,,,,but it’s a bit too much for hanbin to handle for some reason
that being said - hanbin, deep down past the sarcasm and high standards
is a good person
he’d give up everything in the world for his sister, hanging photos of his family sentimentally in his dorm
even though he’d complain about it - he’d shrug off his jacket and drop it into the hands of someone whose cold
scolding them, telling them they’re dumb for not wearing layers but all the while knowing that he just doesn’t want them to get sick
yunhyeong gets teased by hanbin relentlessly everyday of his college life - but he never seems to hold a grudge
and when people ask him why,,,,,,,,yunhyeong just says
“hanbin might say stupid things, but his actions always tell me that he values me as a friend.”
soooo why electrical engineering??? to be honest hanbin had wanted to pursue music but tinkering with the actual hardware of computers and circuits had also caught his interest
he always explains that he works better with his hands than his brain - which seems like it wouldn’t work for engineering
but it does
and the philosophy minor has more to do with the fact that no matter how dumb he tries to say he is
hanbin has bigger ideas about the world, consistently questioning if people have purposes at all
much to jinhwan’s disappointment because
“god hanbin we’re at a club! no one wants to hear about freud! i want to get DRUNK dude!”
hanbin looks cute walking around campus with his nose stuck in a ‘intro to hegel’ textbook, rocking a cute dva keychain on his backpack
and hiding his face behind a white mask because he’s convinced jiwon is stealing his moisturizer and this weather isn’t good for his skin
you’re actually in the nursing program of the university with jinhwan
you hadn’t really meant to befriend the most popular senior in your major - but you’d been randomly assigned to complete a large scale research project with him on new tech influenced medical practices
and had somehow also found yourself agreeing to work on it,,,,,,,in his dorm
“i know the idea of three guys in one dorm is intimidating, but we have a lot of space considering it’s supposed to room up to six people. they’ll be more space for us to spread out!”
jinhwan insisted, unlocking the door to his dorm as you stood uncomfortably behind him
clutching the strap of your messenger bag for dear life
when you follow behind him, you notice both his roommates splayed out on a couch - game controllers in their hands
one of them pushes the other in the shoulder, and - oh my god he doesn’t have a shirt on!
you instantly look down and jinhwan clears his throat
“jiwon go put some cloths on - we have a guest!”
one of them, jiwon you presume, gets up to stroll out of the room
but not before giving you a casual wave as you feel the tips of your ears burn in embarrassment
the remaining roommate gets up too - switching of the ps4 as he comes over to you and jinhwan
“this is hanbin, i know he looks like he wants to kill you, but that’s just because he’s ugly.”
jinhwan introduces
and hanbin rolls his eyes, mumbling about how if jinhwan wasn’t his senior - he’d really have something nasty to say
before looking at you
he’s handsome, you think, but jinhwan is right he does have kind of a cold expression in his eyes
but either way - you manage out a small introduction and hanbin returns with his own
it’s only maybe thirty seconds of interaction? it’s the first time you speak to hanbin and you never expect it to cross your mind ever again
you go by weeks, coming over to this dorm to work on this project with jinhwan
jiwon and hanbin never really bother you guys, only asking every now and then what jinhwan wants to order for dinner - inviting you to stay and pratake in late night pizza or home cooking from jiwon’s aunts
sometimes hanbin will help you guys, not that he knows much about nursing
but he knows about researching and tech
you’ll sit with your laptop shared between you and him and jinhwan
and it used to be weird - being alone in this space of three friends, but before you knew it
it was comfortable
and then,,,,,,,,,,,,something changed
it was a week before you and jinhwan would be presenting your project
it was nearly done and this was supposed to be a run through of what you’d both be saying
but since you had classes till 9 pm, you only managed to get to their dorm when it was already pretty dark
the door was open and you let yourself in, setting down the bag of canned coffee and candy you’d bought from a nearby grocery
assuming you and jinhwan would need major caffeine to go through this large presentation
but to your shock, jinhwan wasn’t home - nor was jiwon
it was only you and hanbin
he’d shuffled out of his room, hair a mess and glasses perched on top of his head
“do you know where jinhwan is?”
hanbin had yawned and shook his head
“nope, probably got caught up hanging out with someone but he’ll be back soon”
he saunters over to you, rummaging through the bag you’d brought and pulling out a can of coffee
“can i have one? im going to be up for a final tonight too.”
you tell him to help himself, looking up to see hanbin’s eyes are tired - ringed with red like he hasn’t slept in days already
for a couple of minutes you guys make casual chit-chat
multiple times after finding out you’d been working with jinhwan at his dorms people have asked
is hanbin as scary as he seems? is he always mean to you? he seems like the type to nag or get angry over anything.......
but he’d never been even close to mean - he was always just,,,,,,normal
and even though he was less talkative and forthcoming than jiwon
and never downright flirty like jinhwan
he was nice in his own way
hanbin excuses himself to get back to studying and you get comfortable on the couch
opening up your notes as you wait for jinhwan
the time passes as you fall deeper into your notes
it reaches midnight and jinhwan doesn’t show any signs of coming back - neither does jiwon
you worry, maybe they’re both in trouble?
so you get up and make your way over to hanbin’s room, softly knocking on the door
after a few seconds of shuffling, he opens it and you apologize to interrupt but isn’t he also worried where his two friends are?
hanbin sighs, but agrees with you
“those idiots know the RA will lose it if we stay out past midnight. i should go and try to find them,,,,,,,,”
“ill help, if that’s ok?”
hanbin nods, taking his coat off his desk chair
you and him make a couple of rounds around the campus hot spots
there are tons of people still studying in the library and even a couple hanging around the gym
but not jinhwan and jiwon
hanbin tries calling them, then texting donghyuck who usually knows where to find at least one of them
but no luck
“im sure they’re just out partying. but what an idiot, im going to tell jinhwan off for forgetting he promised to study with you.”
you smile weakly
“it’s ok! im sure he didn’t mean to forget.”
“still, he’s older than both of us - he should really be more responsible.”
hanbin checks the time on his phone again
“c’mon ill walk you back to your dorm.”
you thank him, searching for your keys in your pockets when you realize you left your bag back at their place
you embarrassingly admit it, but hanbin tells you that it’s fine - you guys can go get it and then he’ll walk you home either way
“being out late like this is dangerous”
you two return and you pick up your bag, but before you go hanbin offers to go through your presentation with you if you want
at least that way you haven’t completely wasted your time
even though the clock ticks past one in the morning - hanbin watches you present from your note cards
clicking through the slides on your laptop
he even helps with some of the formatting and suggests helpful changes
the time escapes you at some point, and when the presentation is over you just end up on the couch beside hanbin
as you two just talk
as hanbin reveals to you his interests in philosophy - in the big questions of the world
and as you let him know that a lot of the same questions are the reason why you got into nursing
“i want a purpose in life - i want to help people.”
“see, i think even though purposes can vary - that’s one that never changes.”
you take a moment, thinking it over and finding that it’s true - no matter where your life goes, your profession would mean you cared for people
“do you think just having a good career where you help others is worth living?”
hanbin looks down at his hands and shrugs
“maybe, some people tell me the purpose of life is to fall in love and start a family. some tell me it’s about making money. but our connections to others - isn’t that what matters? isn’t that how we’re defined?”
the conversation spans on and on, you both lose yourselves
and hanbin doesn’t think he’s ever really talked to someone like this before
and you don’t think you’ve ever felt so ,,,,, open with someone you might not even call a friend yet
and who knows why or how you two got here
what chain of events lead you up to being in hanbin’s dorm on a thursday night past midnight
and why when you should have left hours ago and he should have returned to his books
you’d ended up moving closer and closer
till the only light in the room, the one from your laptop screen dulls
and you lean forward, one hand on hanbin’s thigh
lips brushing his
your memory flashes to the first time you met - how cold his eyes had seemed, but how it didn’t take away from how handsome you thought he was
and hanbin - who’d spent most of his time avoiding these situation, not involving himself romantically with anyone
was letting you do this
and maybe he doesn’t say it to anyone
especially not to himself
that he’s always found himself drawn to you
the image of you sitting cross legged on the floor with jinhwan, debating resources for your project
how you’d come over sometimes after class, with a thousand different papers in your hands
a pencil tucked cutely behind your ear
the way you’d laughed, filling the dorm with a musical soft sound when jiwon showed you a video of jinhwan pouring drinks all over himself on a dare one time
how he’d be playing video games with jiwon, pulling jinhwan’s attention away
and you never got angry
instead hanbin would put down his controller and catch you on your phone, lower lip between your teeth
and now
when you’d chosen to let him help you, had chosen to talk with him through the night
and you’d chosen to kiss him
and for a moment he’d chosen to kiss you back
but then
you both were pulling away - as if simultaneously realizing how this situation was just
too sudden
too abrupt
so you collect your things, hanbin gets up to walk you to the door, but it’s shutting in his face before he can even blink
“tell jinhwan to call me when he’s back”
is the last thing you say
and after that everything in hanbin’s world falls out of sync
like the planets have all aligned but it’s wrong - his center of gravity just doesn’t exist
jinhwan turns up in the morning, profusely apologizing to you on the phone as hanbin listens quietly
“it totally slipped my mind that we said we’d study again - i’ll buy you lunch as an apology - no no don’t even think about saying no, i was such a dumbass!”
hanbin clutches his fist, some weird feeling of uneasiness piling up in the pit of his gut
when jinhwan hangs up, hanbin gets up with such a loud sound it startles his roommate
“dude, what’s wrong?”
hanbin doesn’t meet jinhwan’s gaze
“you are a dumbass, i don’t care if you’re older than me - you deserve to be called that.”
jinhwan sort of goes speechless as he watches hanbin disappear down the hall
you and jinhwan give your presentation, it goes great, you get an A
and after that
you never come around anymore
and hanbin hates that your absence weighs on him
why aren’t they sitting on the couch? why aren’t they laughing at something stupid one of us did? why aren’t they here - why can’t i see them?
hanbin finds himself walking past flower stands, seeing bouquets of roses or tulips and for some reason he hovers
what kind of flowers do they like? do they even like flowers in the first place? and why do i care - why do i want to know so badly?
the shopkeepers always try to ask if he needs help, he has been standing staring at them for twenty minutes
but hanbin never buys them - just apologizes and runs off
but it’s not just flowers, this happens with everything
and he doesn’t get it - it doesn’t make sense
when he catches you coming out of from class, chatting with some of your friends
an unstoppable urge pushes him toward you - but he takes every ounce to fight it back
yes you two kissed - but it was spur of the moment - and you had run away
why would he approach you now, wouldn’t that just seem desperate?
but in reality, you’re just like hanbin
you’re much more versed in these feelings so you realize you have a crush on him, one that had harbored itself over those late night study sessions with jinhwan
where you’d be working on your project, but be acutely aware of hanbin’s presence
the little noises he made when he lost to jiwon in games, how he looked good even in sweatpants and a t-shirt
you don’t really know why you pushed away from him in that moment you had with him
it was just weird
he had sort of kissed you back? but there seemed to be this air of hesitance so you ran away
you wish you could talk to him, figure it out
but you also come to the same conclusion
i don’t want to seem desperate
about a good two weeks passes before suddenly jinhwan is standing in front of you outside of the nursing building with his hands on his hips
“hey, we need to talk”
“but the project is over-”
“no, we have another problem. a problem that i have to live with until i graduate so i want to sort it out now.”
at first you’re utterly confused
how are you at all involved with any problems of jinhwans - but then jinhwan sighs and goes
“hanbin, im talking about hanbin.”
did he tell jinhwan about what happened!?!?
you feel a rush of embarrassment, not sure how to explain to the senior of yours that it was a mistake, really just a mistake
but then you see something change in jinhwan’s expression
“i think he likes you.”
backtracking for a second you kind of just stare at jinhwan in disbelief
“h-he likes me? and he told you to tell me?”
jinhwan shakes his head and you two sit down on the steps of the building
“no, he didn’t. actually, i don’t think he himself realizes what his feelings are. hanbin is kind of ,,,,,,,,,,,, bad in the relationships department.”
you look down, remembering something hanbin had said to you the last night you saw each other
our connections with people is what matters
“oh,,,,but - how do you know that he feels that way if he hasn’t even said it?”
jinhwan gives a weak smile
“because i saw him toss chocolates into the garbage, make a playlist full of love songs before deleting it angrily off his laptop, and the guy ive known since we were in highschool suddenly didn’t look like someone i knew at all. he’s struggling and only one thing makes hanbin like that.”
jinhwan touches your hand gently
“and it’s love.”
to be honest, you don’t know what to do with this information
that night on the couch, you felt a strong connection with hanbin. so strong that it lead you to do something drastic and out of character, but looking back on it
the feeling was blissful
and if you could build on that,,,,with hanbin,,,,,,you really wouldn’t mind at all
but how can i just approach him now? it’s been some time, what if he just flat our rejects me?
you sigh, lost in your thoughts as the bustle of university life surrounds you
couples pass you by, laughing and talking
holding hands and kissing
and then the crowd parts and for a split second across them all you see a figure all alone
it’s hanbin
he has a book in one hand, coffee in the other - his backpack at his feet with the corner of his engineering textbook sticking out
he briefly looks up, meeting your gaze
and then the sea of people returns and you feel something in your heart tug
you go forward, confident that you can push through the bustle of people who are running around campus all the time
classes just let out so there’s a swarm but you walk right into the middle
i should go talk to hanbin! if jinhwan is right,,,,,,,i want to make sure of it myself!
but you don’t even have to make it to the end of the people because hanbin meets you halfway
and you both look at each other, wide eyed and shocked
“did you-”
“i wanted to talk-”
you feel your shoulder get brushed past by students, hanbin clutching his bag closer not to be in anyone’s way
and then without really thinking about it you put a hand on his wrist and you two join the moving flow
you sit down with him somewhere more secluded, neither of you is sure what to stay or how to start this
until hanbin mumbles
“let’s just do this all over again?”
you nod and before you know it he’s set down his book and coffee and leans in
cold fingertips on your cheeks as he asks you to close your eyes and this time
he’s the one that kisses you
and there are no intentions of pulling away
“why did you start liking me?”
“i guess i always thought you were cute, ever since you started coming around for your project with jinhwan. but after talking to you,,,”
hanbin looks for the right word
“it just clicked. you’re the kind of person that i want.”
jinhwan calls it when you come back hand in hand with hanbin to the dorms
like legit he gets his tiny body onto the couch, pointing at you two triumphantly like I KNEW IT
while jiwon is just flabbergasted
because quote on quote “you like hanbin back? but he has no redeeming qualities,,,,,,”
hanbin: “jiwon the only thing smaller than a pea is your brain”
but they both are just joking, they are actually super happy to see that hanbin has gotten a partner
because honestly there were bets going around in the group that he’d end up a hermit or something
yunhyeong, chanwoo, junhoe, and donghyuk all meet you a couple of days later when jinhwan insists they go out for drinks to celebrate
‘hanbin becoming a man’
yunhyeong and donghyuk immediately give you their contacts - just in case hanbin tries anything funny
while junhoe and chanwoo just clap hanbin on the back because - wow never thought you had it in you!
to be honest it’s a little bit embarrassing to be surrounded by hanbin’s friend group, they’re all such strong personalities, but they accept you just fine
dating hanbin means putting up with his roommates shenanigans
which are harmless toward you, just a lot of watching hanbin get teased for being bad at overwatch and jinhwan telling you that hanbin fell asleep in jeans three times this week
and the rest of his friends are just as fun, telling you joke stories about hanbin
but also RELENTLESSLY bringing up every gushy thing he’s said or done for you
“did you know hanbin put your picture on his phone case?”
“did you know hanbin spent hours googling ‘date ideas’ last night?”
“did you know hanbin almost broke chanwoo’s headset when chanwoo suggested that he’d invite you over to get coffee with him sometime?”
like it’s amazing how close they all are,,,,but now you’re in the cross fire of it all too
hanbin teaches you that the easiest thing is to ignore them - even though you know that he doesn’t
like you’re giving him a hug goodbye after you all went to the movies and you just know junhoe is wiggling his eyebrows and hanbin is flipping him off
but speaking of dates - hanbin is surprisingly good at picking romantic spots even though he admits that he’s never really been a romantic person
you guys go to a lot of live music shows, especially r&b soloist and jazz
hanbin reveals to you that he’s always had an interest in writing and producing music
and when you ask him excitedly to sing for you
he just goes “ah- what? no way!” but at some point you pester him just enough for him to sing a line from a song you like
and your jaw just drops because his voice is unique and can go pretty deep
and now every time you stay over, dozing off on hanbin’s chest you can hear him mumble the lyrics of some song against your hair
but other dates include; exploring wine bars, hanbin taking blurry photographs of you when you’re out in the park, and of course helping each other study
even though opening an engineering textbook scares the living daylights out of you
and hanbin will be the first to admit that he has no clue about any of the bones in his body
“but if you want to give me a full body exam, feel free?”
“hanbin,,,,,,,,,,did you just use a pick up line on me?”
“maybe”
“hanbin,,,,,,,,,,,we’re dating.”
his clumsiness does show itself when he’s trying to be a good boyfriend
because sometimes he can’t think of the right things to say and he needs to ask jinhwan for tips on how to deal with arguments
but he’s trying
no matter what - he’s trying to be the kind of boyfriend you dream about
and just seeing the effort makes you fall more in love
will hand write apology letters even if he just showed up late to pick you up from class LOL
he is pretty good at motivating you though
sometimes you’ll actually ask him to critique your work or tell you how you can do this or that better
and he’s shocked because his opinions usually just get taken the wrong way by people
but you know hanbin can really help you so you’re like give me your worst critique ever!!! i can handle it!!!!
he thinks it’s cute how you sometimes want him to tell you what’s wrong even though he’s told you ten times nothing is wrong
and he’ll be like “ok fine, ummm i don’t like the font you used”
“hanbin please take this more seriously”
“ok i don’t like that you indented twice here - im sorry don’t throw that pillow at me!”
playing video games with hanbin and beating him at them and then having to kiss his face all over because nooooo you didn’t mean tooooo
kissing hanbin is always a thrill
he’s a good kisser, but sometimes he can knock you off your feet a little and you have to stop him before he goes too far in public
like his need for affection is pretty high
which is a shocker considering he avoided relationships for so long
but now he’s just like kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss
starts working out so he looks better taking his shirt off and you never notice because like hello he’s hot already
but he’s just like gonna flex and turn my partner on but it’s like whatever you’re already turned on
the tattoo?? the broad shoulders?? the darkness that overcasts his eyes when he gets ontop of you?? LIKE,,,,,,,,
you come out of his room one day wearing just his shirt and jiwon drops his poptart because he’s surprised
and in an instant hanbin is in front of you blocking you off like “jiwon close your eyes you sinner”
and jiwon is like i just want to eat my poptart bro please put some pants on you’re more naked than your significant other
hanbin also surprises you because he gets pretty artsy, like he likes old movies and roll films
and you get him a polaroid on his birthday and he makes one of those cute hanging decorations with photos of you to hang above his desk
donghyuk is like that’s so diy hanbin how cute
and hanbin is like if you call me cute ill kill you,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,but also it is cute isn’t it?
finally hanbin learns what your favorite flowers are and he gets them for you randomly and you’re like oooo so pretty
and the way your face lights up everytime just. kills. him
you’re the cutest person to have ever lived
late night conversations about life, sipping milk tea on the roof of the nursing building while sharing kissing every now and then, watching ghilbi movies under the covers together
dating hanbin is such an experience and it’s one that reminds you why you started feeling something for him in the first place
and it’s because past the surface, there’s a whole world inside of him
and although people get too frightened to befriend or get close to him, the truth is he’s never wished ill on anybody
in fact - he means to help even if it comes out kinda rough
but you appreciate all of that about him
and hanbin finally feels like someone on this planet really is his soulmate
he might have not believed it before
but looking up at you
as you comb your hands through his hair with his head in your lap
watching the tv screen idly after a tough day of classes
and smiling shyly when the male lead on the screen grabs the other lead and kisses them with everything
putting your gaze down to travel over hanbin’s own lips
he thinks
soulmates are real
and he motions for you to lean down and let him kiss you with just as much passion
jinhwan walking in, unfazed by this pda: hanbin look how far you’ve come, from not being able to touch another persons shoulder to making out on MY couch
#ikon scenarios#ikon imagines#ikon au#hanbin scenarios#hanbin imagines#hanbin au#b.i scenarios#b.i imagines#b.i au#writing commissions#sfw#college!au#THIS is so artsy because hanbin is ARTSY........and cute
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Death Stranding
I had to write about Death Stranding to get this not very good game out of my head and soul
(this has spoilers I guess but honestly who cares)
I was going to wait to play Death Stranding, if I ever even played it at all. I had barely seen any trailers outside of the first couple. I remember seeing them and thinking “this isn’t going to be the crazy, weird experience everyone thinks it’s going to be”. I didn’t think that I knew better than anyone else, or that the people who were excited were stupid to feel that way. I just felt like I could see what it was and knew that, having played the majority of Kojima’s work, that this probably wasn’t going to be the experience that people thought it was going to be.
And I was comfortable with my disinterest, content to know that this thing existed, that I was fine with it existing away from me. But then a week before release when the review embargo lifted and people started posting their impressions and experiences and reviews my interest was piqued in a way that no trailer or announcement had interested me before. It wasn’t the glowing and fawning reviews that drew me to the game, the people who played and loved the game. It was, weirdly, the negative ones that changed me from not having any interest in playing Death Stranding to going to the store on the Friday morning it was released and standing in the rain waiting too long for an Uber so I could get home as fast as possible to start playing.
The reason the negative reviews drew me to the game so much is not because they were negative, it’s not that I was taking some joy in getting to play something that I thought was going to be bad and now I had an opportunity to be vindicated by seeing for myself that it is bad. It was the things that they were negative about that sounded so interesting. The idea that a group of people would spend so much time and effort and money in creating a large premier video game experience where the main crux seemed to be tedium is an inherently fascinating concept.
The kind of elevator pitch descriptor that interested me the most (that was used by people both derisively and positively) was that it was a post-apocalyptic truck simulator. Travelling a dead or dying world as a UPS driver. Mad Max meets King of Queens (that’s a comparison that I made and I’m too proud of it not to use it). What if a development team who made one of the great action games on the last decade (Metal Gear Solid V might be a terribly lacking narrative experience with some frustrating mission design, but the core gameplay is extremely good) and funnelled all of that energy into something intentionally boring and monotonous?
Not only did that help reset my expectations of what this would be, it made me feel excitement for something that I had previously thought I wouldn’t be able to feel excitement or anticipation for.
I spent 40 hours with it over the course of a week. That might not sound like a lot of time in video game speak, but I don’t remember the last time I spent that much time with a game over such a short period of time. Over the first weekend I had it I played for just over 20 hours. Twenty hours. I don’t know if I’ve ever been that focused on a game in my life. But still when I reflect on my time with it, and especially when I try to recall those initial 20 hours which were far and away the most fun I had with the game, I feel nothing. It’s like static, like someone has gone back and just erased that time from my memory.
That’s maybe not entirely fair. I remember general things, just not specific gameplay moments.
I remember the gameplay loop. It’s less a truck simulator game and more of a hiking game, at least initially. And this was appealing to me. You’re slowly traversing across these barren, empty environments delivering packages to and from outposts and shelters. You’re packing a huge amount of garbage on your back and climbing up mountains and down cliffs and wading through rivers. You’re given ropes and ladders to try and ease your journey, and later you’re able to build greater structures like bridges and towers to help you more easily navigate the environment and scout your path ahead. Eventually you’re given access to motorbikes and trucks that can both help and hinder your deliveries, depending on the paths you take and forge. You even get a chance to help rebuild an actual honest to goodness highway, creating it piece by piece by providing an increasing amount of materials to each section. Maybe the greatest accomplishment I felt playing this game was spending a few hours creating large sections of the highway and then getting to just fly down it on a motorbike. It really did feel like I hate created something big, that I not only radically changed the world by creating this, but that I had bettered it.
And there’s there community aspect of the game. Having others donate materials to your structures as well as seeing structures others have built and abandoned vehicles and packages in your world is all really neat and interesting. Everything positive I have to say about this game is wrapped up in these systems, because there is a lot of the game that feels like you’re on a genuine journey. Taking a package over the peak of a snow capped mountain for the first time can feel like a legitimate achievement, it was rewarding just walking from one place to the next. Seeing a bridge helpfully placed in a frustrating location made me feel real gratitude toward that person, and receiving feedback that other people were using and liking things that I had built made me feel good, as if I was paying forward the help that I had received.
For a long time I didn’t even think there would be combat in the game but it gradually increases as you go along and, while it’s never good, it’s still serviceable and easy enough to never really get in the way. The shooting and melee combat feels off, and I might have had a better time if it wasn’t there at all, but a few boss encounters and combat vignettes were interesting and would occasionally help when the monotony of just delivering packages started to grow.
But after 20 hours of this nothing really stood out to me, there’s no one gameplay moment that will stay with me. I won’t reflect on this game and think “wow, remember that one journey I took by following the coastline?” It’s all just a long, sustained blur.
And it’s not that I don’t remember the story or the characters either. Those are all easy to recall. The story is especially easy to recall because, over 40 hours, it’s just basically telling you one thing over and over and over. It’s hard not to recall it, because there is only one thing to recall.
The thing that I was worried about before the game came out was that the story was just going to be a huge mess. Kojima’s games are always functionally good to great, that’s never really been an issue I’ve had with his work, it’s always been the stories he tries to tell and how he tries to tell them. From the first Metal Gear Solid through to The Phantom Pain there are always misgivings I’ve had with character representation, general themes, and just the delivery of that narrative. I know this isn’t a unique position to have regarding his work (sexism and his consistently awful portrayal of women is a pretty famous issue he has, even among his biggest fans), but beyond that I just never felt that anything he was doing was particularly special. They were different and almost always interesting, but a lot of people would like to tell you that Kojima was doing masterful video game storytelling that no one else was capable, that he was single-handedly raising the medium of video games to something as artistically valid and viable as cinema or art. But, to me, he was never doing that. He was making fun and compelling video games, but they were inconsistent and messy and overly verbose and self-righteous.
So my concern was that, now that he was the head of an independent studio that for all intents and purposes answered to no one, he would let that his storytelling get further away from him. In an attempt to prove his level of creativity, maybe to even prove his worth, he was going to put all of his ideas on the table and the result was going to be an indecipherable mess. When they would release a trailer of a naked Norman Reedus on a beach holding a baby attached to him with an artificial umbilical cord, or Guillermo Del Toro standing in a sewer holding a baby in a jar while Mads Mikkelsen is covered in black tar leading a bunch of skeleton soldiers a lot of people responding with a variant of “wow Kojima is going to make something crazy, this is going to blow my mind”. But all I saw was a giant red flag.
So when I finally experienced the story of Death Stranding I was kind of taken aback. Not by how crazy or nonsensical it is, but by kind of how… boring and one note it is? There isn’t really any room for interpretation in this story. It’s all very, very literal. It tells you how and why things are happening, and if you missed the exposition the first time don’t worry! Here is another twenty minute info dump reiterating the same boring, one note narrative over and over.
The game just tricks you into thinking it’s being more creative than it is because it’s filled with endless jargon. There is timefall, void outs, BTs, BBs, Beaches, repatriates, chiral energy, and extinction entities. Ha and ka. But it’s all in service of creating a world and a narrative that ultimately says nothing, and spends dozens of hours painfully and slowly telling you nothing. It’s borderline torturous.
There is also some high school art level social commentary on social media. Likes are a huge commodity in this world, with people becoming addicted to the feeling you get when they receive one. And instead of having a smart phone or whatever you have Cuff Links, which is a literal pair of handcuffs that, when strapped to your wrist, functions as a way to communicate with people through the Codec or email. Because our phones are a prison, right guys? Pretty deep. In Kojima’s world we truly do live in a society.
But it’s not just the small stuff like that that’s so literal, every part of the game is literal. You’re Sam Porter Bridges, a porter who has a contract with the organisations Bridges, created by someone named Bridget, to create bridges with people across America (both figuratively and literally) to create a network across the continent that will bridge everyone together. Every metaphor and theme in the game is so painfully literal that the game never gives you the opportunity to interpret anything else. The only time there are moments in the game when you don’t know what is happening is when characters start talking about things that you could have no way of knowing about as if you did know about them, but even then these moments of mystery are immediately undone because they always immediately explain the thing that you missed. You will have a cryptic conversation with someone about something you have had no opportunity to deduce or discover on your own, but it never matters because it’s followed up a few minutes later with a flashback or exposition that lays everything out on the table.
Instead of Kojima creating something nonsensical and imaginative and impossible to follow, he managed to make the world’s most shallow metaphor about really nothing in particular. When he said that the game was inspired by Donald Trump and Brexit he meant that it was inspired by the division that these things caused between people and how we need to create Bridges to reconnect with people.
That’s it, that’s the game. That is its message. And it’s not interestingly presented, there’s nothing more to it than that.
One of the podcast conversations I listened to before released (that was largely critical of the game) that drew me toward playing it ended with one of the people saying “It is a game that I think everyone should experience, but not one that I could ever recommend” which is a perfect way of articulating how I feel. It’s a unique experience that does things that a game of its size has never really done before. I don’t think there’s merit in being different for differences’ sake, but this isn’t that. The gameplay is considered and deliberate and purposeful, but that doesn’t mean that it’s fun and it doesn’t negate the parts that are tedious and tiring. Just because you make something boring and annoying on purpose that doesn’t make it good.
If you had asked me six months ago if I think I would like Death Stranding I would have said no. I probably would have qualified it by saying I hope that I was wrong, that I would like it to be good, but that I was probably more likely to hate it.
I didn’t love it, and I don’t like it. I don’t even hate it, but in a weird way I wish that I could. Because then at least I would feel something toward it. Instead Death Stranding leaves me feeling something much, much worse.
It makes me feel nothing.
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So Fila’s actual past isn’t very detailed, because she’s not a main OC, and I haven’t spent a ton of time actually thinking about her as a character lol. 98% of my Creativity goes to my original content characters, cuz someday when I finish actually crafting my worlds, I’m gonna write a book. I’m aiming for the lofty goals of making a full, fleshed out, intricate— just fuckin’... a whole ass Multiverse system comparable to the Lore content of Tolkien’s works, or The Elder Scrolls— gah fuck y’know what, I’m changing this post from being about my Fantasy Life OC to being about my creation baby, the effort of about 6 years (I am 20 years old, and although I didn’t know it at the time I started, I was 14 when I made the shitty Fire Emblem Manakete rip-off race that I’m gonna actually now talk about, because holy fuck this ain’t gonna fit in a parenthesis “btw have some info” bubble)
A’ight so I have a hard time keeping track of time, especially in a large scale across years. Apparently it’s related to being severely depressed without medication (communication error on my part, my parents are very lovely and helped me ASAP when I spilled the beans) while also having moderate to severe ADD. So, ya know, keep in mind that I was yet another terribly depressed 8th grader when I talk about my creation’s early days. I wouldn’t experience that time of my life for any sort of payment ever. It was goddamn miserable, because when I was midway through the age of 14, not only did the aforementioned depression spring up, but I also realized I was bisexual (And I live in the infamous state of Alabama, for reference. Don’t fear for me though, I was too unnoticeable to be bullied if anyone did know, and my wonderful mother, whom I love and cherish with all of my heart, is one of the few Christians that actually... like... do what their own God tells em to. That is, Jesus. I’m an atheist and have a general discomfort about the idea of super powerful entities actually existing irl, but I do agree with the stuff I’ve heard and remember from a decade ago in Church about Jesus. Good guy. But yeah my mom not only accepted me and reassured me when I came out, but she’s gone even further and is of the opinion/fact that lgbt folks are, really, good and normal and that God created them, so she really genuinely just... loves and accepts me. There’s no “I love you despite of this” in the equation and I am so grateful. But again. I digress)
Pause after that sidetrack, to recap, all of my medical issues began to emerge about 6 months before I turned 15. Including what I hate most, the emergence of my Fibromyalgia and Sjogren’s Syndrome, and for an added kick to the flesh, an undifferentiated connective tissue disorder. Meaning, as what I understand it to be, a nameless chimaera of many symptoms in a way that the disorder either is it’s own thing, or just can’t easily be recognized as any one disorder. And I had anxiety. If I recall correctly on *that*, forgive me cuz it’s been a while since it’s been diagnosed/brought up in a significant way, I have or had either general anxiety *and* social anxiety, or just lightweight versions of both, or something, but at the time I was horribly shy and I couldn’t even talk to the teacher after class about schoolwork, even though I tried rationalizing it to hell and back that I shouldn’t be scared— as you’ll guess, shit didn’t work out til I got medicine for it, because no amount of logic and rational thought will change the fact that I was struggling because of a literal disorder, an error of the brain, and as with that walking with two shattered femurs ain’t gonna work, trying to talk when the talk machine broke... ain’t going to goddamn work.
God. I am rambling a lot. But anyway, shit fucking sucked as a teen for me, because I got that wombo combo, prepare for trouble, make it double, precision strike at my existence as a person during fucking already difficult puberty— I am rambling. It’s 4:55am as of this sentence lmao. I had a nasty cocktail of both mental illness and physical disorders pop up once puberty hit me, so I, through many events starting from loving to draw as a toddler, to play pretend stories of heartbreak, betrayal, and death as best an 8 year old could understand via playing with Polly Pockets, and all the creative power I inherited from my Dad, plus the motivation borne through a need to escape, I started making my own characters.
So, to return to the present state of my creations, which will now be referred to as Bounding Beyond the Stars, or BBtS, I’m gonna get some things out of the way. Just to clarify, yeah? I have created my worlds in a way that is specifically meant to stand apart from the irl universe as we know it. I’m certainly not a knowledgeable researcher with any level of comprehension on Spacial law and quantum physics and shit like that. So hey, if something ever seems... like, off, or wrong? Unless it’s pretty obviously wrong in the “hey you just googled how a thing works, and misunderstood it, and made a detail based on a failure to understand stuff and that’s dumb in a catastrophic way that even a high school level viewer would notice...” kind of mistake, then hey, shoot me a message. But if some sort of universal rule seems fucky in the way that it doesn’t make sense, but isn’t a catastrophic structural error... well, Imma use that sentence to start a better one. For an example of a catastrophic error, perhaps... this: “This planet has no seasons cuz of its shape and axis! And it is also like twice as big as Earth!” That would be catastrophic alone because anyone with a grasp on planetary gravity or something, may go and think “if it’s that big, gravity’s gonna be way more intense”. And you’d be right! Which is why I usually account for those things with... *Magic*.
Before I split this post for Length reasons, and I’m sorry the majority of this was me rambling about how my general experience with life sucked from ages 14-17, I’mma state something very important about all my creations.
Magic, which will be explained in depth at a later point, is a fundamental, essential, and omnipresent force of not just any one universe in my Multiversal Trio. It is a key piece of Reality itself, as magic is the flow of many multiples of millions of unique and mysterious energies, concepts, and laws existing anywhere that Is.
To end this post, I’m going to put a quick summary and explanation why I’m rambling about any of this: The rant about my age and circumstances at the start are relevant because it’s necessary context for the tone and type of writing my creations are built upon. The foundations of BBtS are borne from a sometimes angsty, sometimes genuinely upset 14 year old who found escape in the art of Creation. There have been many, many, many heavy edits, rewrites, scrapped info and ideas, and even more info built upon it. It used to be pretty pointlessly edgy in a lot of ways, and redundant in grimdark, morphing into *grimderp* plot devices and character traits. The way it’s written today, I like to think the lore of my many high fantasy-alien societies, and all its denizens and creators and whatever else, are still written to be dark, be dangerous, even angsty... but more skillfully so, with the sort of nuance a 14 year old wouldn’t really even begin to understand. Cuz I still like high stakes stories with real consequences and character deaths when appropriate. And I enjoy characters who have tragic pasts, but now that I’m older and I’ve seen and read about and done so much more— I can write that stuff *better*. And more over, what I’m most satisfied with, is that I’m more in touch with myself as a person, and I’ve evolved many of my personal beliefs and ideals and all the things of the world I can have opinions on. But most of all, I’ve reached a point where I have consumed enough content from others to where I have figured out how to write something that should be interesting, and maybe a bit new, because I put a looot of Damn focus on identifying, and understanding, writing structure, cliches, plot holes to avoid, character traits to handle differently, and just generally making something that’ll appeal to both me, and my audience, should I get that far.
#original content#ramble#long ramble#worldbuilding#personal history#long post#fantasy#sci-fi#science fiction#it’s currently 5:24am as i think of appropriate tags lol#sleep deprived#late night/early morning thoughts
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okay, i’m on my way home from AWA and i’ve finally had time to actually look into overwatch 2 and collect my thoughts, so here goes... this is gonna get far too long and essentially be a big essay that i know most people won’t care about, but i just really wanna get my thoughts out so i’ll drop it under a readmore! also be warned that if you‘re super into the new character designs you won’t be into part of this post, lol. but anyway:
first off, i think a lot of the discourse i’ve seen about it seems... overblown and based on inaccurate info?? (don’t worry i am not talking about hong kong here, people are absolutely justified in hating blizzard for that and so do i). people keep acting like they’re gonna charge $60 just for new maps or something but for one thing no price or release date has been announced (in fact, the dev team doesn’t even know when it will release and it’s been said that we may have to wait until 2020 for a date, because it’s still early in development), and for another thing overwatch 1 wasn’t even $60 on pc at launch?? yes on console it was which sucks but most of the playerbase is on pc, and the base game was $40 at launch for us. blizzard cannot be so colossally stupid that they’d charge more for this than for the base game, and if they do i’ll absolutely be complaining about it, but for now we literally have no clue how much the cost for OW2 will be.
and on top of that, it’s... not just new maps? it’s new maps, yes, but also multiple new heroes at launch, a whole new PvP mode, a PvE story mode which is something people have begging for to move the lore forward, a new updated engine, and the PvE will have its own maps and brand new abilities and skill trees—with the abilities and skill trees being unlike anything overwatch has done before, and uniquely exclusive to OW2 and not affecting the PvP so you’re not unfairly disadvantaged if you don’t have OW2—and i also feel the need to reiterate that it’s still in early development so i highly doubt we already know all there is to know. blizzard hasn’t been entirely clear on what overwatch 2 even is tbh but it’s certainly not just new maps and if you think it is then i’m actually begging you to spend at least 30 seconds on google because 30 seconds is really all you need to click on one article and see that that’s far from the truth.
also if you’re not interested in the lore then from what i’m gathering you don’t even need to buy it because apparently OW1 is getting all the same stuff except for that? like, people are saying blizzard should just release it all as free content, but apparently they almost are since the new “push” game mode, plus the map that comes with it (and any future ones) is coming to OW1 and it’s gonna keep getting all the hero updates and everything that isn’t exclusive to the PvE mode and players will be put into the same PvP lobbies across games?? correct me if i’m wrong on that but it sounds like if you already own OW1 and don’t want the story mode stuff you literally don’t need to buy OW2 at all—so if you do then you’re just buying the story mode/PvE stuff, that’s it. and if you do, every cosmetic item you already own will transfer over! it’s also not like OW1 is done updating, as we know we can still expect new heroes in it before OW2 releases.
don’t get me wrong, i am a bit worried that the amount of new content won’t be enough to justify the price, i do still hate blizzard for the entire hong kong controversy and desperately wish they would do better, and as a massive lore enthusiast and someone whose primary reason for loving overwatch is based in its characters and world i am very frustrated that this is what it takes for the story to actually move forward, but i’m also really excited to see where this all goes and i honestly think people are largely just complaining without actually looking into what they’re complaining about. i also literally don’t understand the idea that “lol overwatch already had this for like a week before they took it out” about the PvE stuff and would like someone to explain that to me if possible because i’ve been playing this game since very shortly after launch and i’m confused asjdjdnfkd
that all being said i do have what i’m guessing is a pretty unpopular opinion though, and it’s that i... i don’t like most of the character redesigns we’ve seen, and the ones i do like i mostly just kinda like, i don’t love them or feel excited about them, while the rest i’m neutral toward or hate, and that actually really upsets me because the ones i hate most are for two of my most favorite characters and it makes me worried for what they might’ve done to redesign and potentially mess up my other faves—but i guess these will be the designs going forward, and everybody’s pretty fanart is gonna have these designs, so i’ll just have to get used to them.
to be more specific on that last point: i absolutely hate lucio and mercy’s hair and i’m honestly really sad about that, especially since i run a mercy appreciation blog and i don’t wanna celebrate her new design on it because i hate it so that would be very insincere of me but i don’t wanna say negative things and complain on it either, but i just think her hair looks so strange now. and i like lucio’s outfit tbh but his weird neon glowstick hair just... ruins it, it looks so bad to me i can’t stand it and i want his regular hair back. i would honestly prefer not to even acknowledge these 2 designs (well, mostly the hair i guess) exist if i could help it. i also don’t like reinhardt’s beard or bun although i am glad to see his face exposed and like the lion on his armor, and i can see his new hair possibly growing on me eventually. and while mei’s design is mostly okay i loved her old hairpin, it was distinctive and cute and i’m sad it’s gone because i dislike whatever it is that’s in her hair now sjdjdkgkd. also before seeing a side by side comparison i legit had to ask a friend if anything was even different about winston or if i was just blind—which i guess, considering how i feel about the others, is a good thing for me lol. but if you like all these designs that’s valid and i’m happy for you!! just don’t expect to see me praising them, but i’m also not gonna be super negative like this too often either.
for kinda-positives: i actually do really enjoy one single new design though, and it’s genji’s, but not for any specific reason other than i’m excited that he’s finally wearing clothes lol. i don’t feel strongly either way about the design of the clothes themselves (...though i do lowkey agree with the people saying they’re boring looking, but hey, my man is finally done running around naked everywhere, so i’ll take it). and i like tracer’s new glasses and the fact that she ditched the crocs finally!! i’d also like to talk a bit more about mei’s design—a friend of mine is saying people are complaining they slimmed her down, and i haven’t seen any of that for myself but if they really are then i uh... don’t get that? she still looks just as fat to me?? i’ll just let this comment i made in discord as soon i saw the new designs speak for itself:
so yeah, if she is any skinner it’s because of the newly normal-sized coat, because when i look at the models side by side she legit looks the same size to me or maybe a little bit smaller—but hey, who knows, maybe i truly am just blind! but anyway, if you gave her old hairpin back then i’d honestly have no issue with her new design.
i truly hope the new designs will grow on me more though, especially mercy’s because the feeling of having an appreciation blog for a character you love a lot and not being able to celebrate something like this is a feeling that really sucks, but i... feel very alone in disliking them as much as i do and while i’m glad everyone else is happy i’m sad about that?? at least all the old skins will still be there though, so ultimately i suppose it isn’t that big a deal, i just really really hope i don’t hate symmetra or hanzo’s redesigns too whenever we see them, assuming that every character is getting these design overhauls.
i’ve also had the time to finally watch the gameplay trailer and the cinematic, and you know what’s one of the things i’ve always loved about overwatch? the maps have always been gorgeous, and the ones shown in the OW2 trailer are no exception and i can’t wait to fully see them and explore them. the gameplay itself looks solid too imo and i am very excited to see sojourn will be added to the game, she’s gorgeous and i love her. and the cinematic!! it had so many cute little details, like the ana & baby pharah photo and the birthday photo, and tracer having that picture of emily. and the winston-tracer-mei friendship, getting to see genji and rein being badasses... seeing brigitte and then echo both show up, mercy and mei having that cute little moment, everybody working together and being amazing. the scene between brigitte and tracer that was adorable, the fact that rein made a terrible “ice to meet you” joke the second he was introduced to mei. seeing winston so happy to be able to say that overwatch is back. just... it was cute and cool and fun and i liked it a lot, it reminded me of what made me fall in love with this game in the first place and it made me really excited! i also think that the story should’ve moved forward like this much sooner and that we should’ve been getting much more shorts and comics in between, and i also wish that we didn’t have to wait until overwatch 2 to get sojourn because we still don’t actually have a black woman that we can play as and that really really sucks, but i’m still looking forward to everything as well.
so, in conclusion: i uh... may have mixed feelings about some things but i have to confess that i’ve loved overwatch for years, many of the characters are very special to me, and i’m genuinely excited about overwatch 2. i fully intend to start looking into charities that support hong kong as soon as i can because i want to actually do something for them and show that i’m not ignoring what’s going on over there, but i also wanna buy overwatch 2 whenever it’s released and i feel excited to play it. unfollow or block me for that if you have to but nothing good would come from me being ashamed to say it and i won’t hide it, i definitely hate blizzard but it doesn’t remove my love for the world they created. i‘m going to donate to hong kong charities and i‘m also going to buy overwatch 2 (which probably won’t even come out until 2021 or something), and i feel like giving more to them than i give to blizzard instead of just not doing anything at all is a fair enough way to deal with this issue especially since i am doing my best to boycott them otherwise. and if i play the new OW2 content and it sucks and/or just isn’t worth whatever the price is i’ll complain about it then, and if/when we see other redesigned characters i’ll probably complain about some of them too, but for now i really am excited for the most part!
#again if you need to unfollow or block me for wanting to buy overwatch 2–or even just continuing to post about ow—then fine go ahead#but i genuinely AM gonna find at least 1 reputable charity to donate to to help hong kong and not only will i donate as soon as i can#but once the price for OW2 is announced i’ll donate more than that price to HK if help is still needed#bc i really do think that will help more than just making posts about how much blizzard stinks#and i do want to help! and i do also think blizzard stinks! i just wanna help AND also get to play this game#so ANYWAY here are my honest thoughts and you can reblog this but if you’re rude to me you’ll be wasting your energy#if i got anything factually wrong about like. what’s in OW2 or whatever please let me know.
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Shipping Info Meme
Answer the following for your muse so people know how shipping works on your blog.
WHAT IS YOUR OTP FOR YOUR CHARACTER?:
I wouldn’t say I have an OTP as such, seeing how Sceada is a creation of my own mind, and largely shaped by his interactions. There has been a number of pairings I have been very, very fond of (because, let’s face it, if I’m not fond of a pairing, I won’t ship it, so all are fond to me), but I can’t name an OTP from them. In order to be able to give an answer here though, I’ll name the one that has persisted for the longest now, and that would be MariaxSceada. They have such a lovely and also healthy dynamic between them, it is always a pleasure to write them, even when things don’t go so well.
WHAT ARE YOU WILLING TO WRITE WHEN IT COMES TO SHIPPING?
Off the top of my head, I cannot think of something I would not be willing to write in regards to shipping, so yeah. I’m here just as much for the build up, the pining and longing, the getting together and the happy life as a couple, as I am here for the angst, the hardships, the tragedies and, sometimes, even the break ups.
HOW LARGE DOES THE AGE GAP HAVE TO BE TO MAKE IT UNCOMFORTABLE?
Well... neither of the parties should be minors in my eyes, but beyond that, it’s really hard to nail down an age gap. For instance, Sceada has both dated woman that were a few years younger, as well as some that have been at least a few years older. So long as their dynamic and chemistry fit, it’s gonna be fine in my eyes.
And besides: If we were to say that it can only be so and so many years, how are we going to deal with the ships where Sceada is with someone at least decades older, like Fran? Or centuries, like it is the case with Rosalia, who’s virtually immortal? Nah, I don’t believe in setting down a line at so and so many years.
ARE YOU SELECTIVE WHEN SHIPPING?
To an extent, yeah. There needs to be some chemistry, and a ship has to make some sense for me.I mean, sure, you can always find ways to make a ship work, even if it makes little sense at first sight and appears contradictory, but let’s be real here: There are just some things that don’t work, and that’s fine.
I mean, you wouldn’t ship mortal enemies together, right? --- --- what? You would? Oh for crying out loud guys...
HOW FAR DO STEAMY MOMENTS HAVE TO GO BEFORE THEY ARE CONSIDERED NSFW?
I vary that depending on who I’m writing with. Usually we can always find a middle ground both are comfortable with, where then things just flow naturally, so to speak. And depending on the partner, that can indeed go quite far... That said, I am also always happy to accommodate those who prefer a lighter route, and would rather have us fade to black. Either way, if explicit stuff is written, it’s always tagged and more often than not under a read more.
WHO ARE OTHER THE CHARACTERS YOU SHIP YOUR CHARACTER WITH?
Okay, so... lets go through them all, shall we?
First, we have Leonora, a ship that sadly grew apart but I still hold very dear. I was lovely, and it offered Sceada so much to learn, and gave him a lot of opportunity to grow, which was sorely needed in those early years. If I’m completely honest, I’m still a bit sad that it ended, especially the way it did...
Maria then, as I’ve already mentioned, is a ship that just seems to click so well, with both being able to offer the other something they needed. And it has given us so many memorable and great scenes, too! Like when Sceada found her after a nightmare and comforted her, claiming that no matter what she’d confess to him, he would not love her any less? Ahhh, so many feelings that come from this ship. I’m really glad it developed into such a long-standing one.
Selphie is another ship, and probably the one that developed in the most amusing way, namely through a lot of “Hey, what if” and “Wouldn’t it be interesting if” as well as an impressive amount of “I have a bad idea” moments between the mun. And it has had such a great payoff and developed into the probably most progressed ship? They are married now, after all, and have a wonderful baby boy! Truly, I’d never have imagined that when things started all that time back... - nor by how they started, hehehe.
The next ship to mention would be Aria, which is a bit of a special ship, to put it that way. It didn’t get much time and room to grow, and was sadly often pushed on the down low due to Aria’s mun being rather busy and sometimes absent for extended periods of time, but... it has really grown on me, you know? It’s a great ship, one that has a lot of potential, and an interesting dynamic, where Sceada is much more in the role of a protector than in any other ship. Not that Aria can’t defend herself, no, that’s not what I mean. But this is a ship where he can offer so so much to her, and be there for her, showing understanding and care and genuine love, and... - uhm, well, you can tell that I am quite fond of it, so... let’s not delve further into this now...
After all, there’s many other ships left to talk about still, starting with Fran. This ship is intriguing in that it started originally as a sort of silent admiration and fascination, and has grown to be at the same time one of the most eloquent and one of the most carnal of ships - a weird combination, I know, but it worked here very well. And I am glad that this is a ship that could be further developed in Discord, where it has reached some interesting points indeed...
Next up is Rosalia, who I’ve already mentioned in regards to age differences - but what do you expect when a goddess and a mortal fall for each other? I really enjoy the dynamic between them, that started out as mentor and student, and from there steadily grew. And, well, I’ll admit it... I have a soft spot for ships that are MortalxImmortal, or close to that. Anyone who’s ever asked me about my favorite book series and then asked me why I love Spice and Wolf so much can tel you that...
Now, we have Emerya, who may not necessarily be a ship outright, but might very well develop into one I feel - I can at least see some potential for it. And should the mun choose to explore it further, I’ll be curious to see where it’ll lead. I can just see them finding a lot of common ground easily, both being outsiders to an extent, and that time they performed with their magic together was an absolute delight. Plus, a free spirit like Emerya is a nice challenge to a somewhat shyer version of Sceada...
Then, let’s also not forget Leila, who although it never grew into a ship really, still left quite the impact on Sceada, and across all verses - and that on a ship, no less :D But yeah, that was interesting as well, and deserves mention. Furthermore, there’s another muse played by the same mun on Discord that has a very intriguing relationship with Sceada, so there’s that too.
Lastly, let’s also mention both Adara and Anna, who are written by the same mun, and where interactions have been mainly based on certain types of asks. Though, I have to admit, I could well see thing working out especially with Anna, and I’m always open for more interaction between the two of them.
DOES ONE HAVE TO ASK TO SHIP WITH YOU?:
Well, to me it is equal parts communication between the muns and chemistry between the muses. I’ll say this though, I don’t necessarily need prior communication though if things start to develop between our muses, and am always down for seeing how that’ll evolve, but after a certain point, I think communication is an absolute must for this, yeah.
HOW OFTEN DO YOU LIKE TO SHIP?
Whenever there’s the chemistry and the desire for it. I’m not one to turn down potential ships, really. Though that does not mind that shipping is the most important thing for me regarding Sceada. No, certainly not. It is a nice thing though, and I enjoy doing it.
ARE YOU SHIP OBSESSED OR SHIP MORE-OR-LESS?:
Probably somewhere in the middle? I dunno.
ARE YOU MULTISHIP?
If the list further up wasn’t enough indication, allow me to state so here as well: Yes, I am multiship - with the main verse also being what I call “polyship”, meaning that there’s multiple ships in the main verse that actively affect each another, and can cause a number of problems like jealousy or the like.
WHAT IS/ARE YOUR FAVOURITE SHIP(S) IN YOUR CURRENT FANDOM?
Puh... let’s see... what FF IX ships am I fond of... Well, there’s GarnetxZidane for sure, and I guess SteinerxBeatrix too in IX. A few years ago I might have said FreyaxAmarant, but I’m no longer as big a fan of that pairing. Hmm...
In other FFs, we have BartzxFaris I’m fond of (or BartzxKrile, but the way the former is played here on tumblr won me over), then I’d say AerithxZack and SelphiexIrvine, and TidusxYuna, though those three are all the kind of where I say, nice that they exist, but not a must for me. Same goes for PeneloxVaan and FranxBalthier. Oh, here’s an amusing one: RamzaxAgrias! And how about RitzxMarche and LusoxAdelle from the Tactics Advance games?
If we’re talking cross-game ships, then the first that comes to mind would be MilleudaxLeon, followed by Warrior of LightxLenne. There’s probably more still that I’m forgetting right now, but I’ll spare you those^^’’
FINALLY, HOW DOES ONE SHIP WITH YOU?:
Find chemistry between our muses and play with me - that’s always a good start. And then, let’s talk ;)
Tagged by: @runexxknight here: [x]
Tagging: For my personal enjoyment, I’ll just tag everyone I am or have been shipping with~ @containyourmainposure @artemisxbow @sunny-explosions @nymphaxea @feralstriike @rebirthxguardian @atieflingwarlock (possibly? We’ll see) @dancing-dagger @deriision
#RequestsHeeded#Muse Info#phew.. that got quite long#but it's another one down in my quest to work through my backlog
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SHIPPING INFO !!
Answer the following for your muse so people know how shipping works on your blog.
WHAT IS YOUR OTP FOR YOUR CHARACTER?: Lunardyn, whoops. (If you listen closely you can hear the purity police sirens from here--) In all seriousness, considering the fact that I went into writing Luna completely undetermined where an OTP was concerned, this one snuck up on me by surprise. I genuinely think that outside of Noctis, no one else understands the unique pressures the Chosen types undergo better than Luna--especially considering the fact that Ardyn was the first proto-Oracle before the OG Oracle came along and that puts him on a unique standing while also being the chosen. Noctis and Luna are his complements, I think. Not to mention, at least with my Luna and @iznia‘s Ardyn, I’ve found out they’re both extremely messed up people and their compatibility is pretty virulent, to put it mildly. They’re not a couple that gets along normally and hurt each other a lot and I really appreciate that kind of complexity.
WHAT ARE YOU WILLING TO WRITE WHEN IT COMES TO SHIPPING?: Most anything, save sexual triggers and themes that degrade minorities in ways outside of a backstory or past trauma. Personally, I prefer complexity first and foremost, something anyone shipping with me would have to acknowledge, that being Luna’s severe mental illnesses that made domestic bliss next to impossible. That, and honestly portrayed characters where no one holds the other back and it’s raw and probably hurts a lot.
HOW LARGE DOES THE AGE GAP HAVE TO BE TO MAKE IT UNCOMFORTABLE?: As long as anyone Luna’s shipping with is preferably 20+, I don’t care so long as no one is aged down/up to make a ship less creepy or whatever. (Unless it’s aging up a younger legal adult for an older adult, ex. aging Luna to be 30+ for someone uncomfortable shipping with 30< y/o’s.)
ARE YOU SELECTIVE WHEN SHIPPING?: Yes and no. On my end, I take a considerable amount of time before admitting I ship something, since I like making a friend and establishing a unique plot as the basis, but people who are forward can be those I appreciate so long as it’s not forcing. All in all, I need a solid, concrete plot to begin with as I can’t write a ship around domesticity or fluff alone (plus I am not a fan of those genres oop).
HOW FAR DO STEAMY MOMENTS HAVE TO GO BEFORE THEY ARE CONSIDERED NS/FW?: Once a make-out turns to petting and on, probably.
WHO ARE OTHER THE CHARACTERS YOU SHIP YOUR CHARACTER WITH?: Based on what I have, Lunardyn with iznia, Crowna with croweoftheglaive & nomadicnovice, Lunyx with servomundi, Lunoct with astralwritten, Dante/Luna | Duna with stylishdevilhunter, Lightning/Luna | Moonlight with praetoriis, Araluna with piiercetheskies, Orion/Luna | Lunion with apocryphorum, Dio/Luna | Diona with bladedaltruism, and Marina/Luna | Maruna with serpentinexfire.
DOES ONE HAVE TO ASK TO SHIP WITH YOU?: Yes, please! It’s actually the fastest way to ship with me, honestly. No forcing though! 8V
HOW OFTEN DO YOU LIKE TO SHIP?: Eh, not super often? I love shipping, but if left to me to approach people, I’d have very few if any ships. :p
ARE YOU SHIP OBSESSED OR SHIP MORE-OR-LESS?: More-or-less. Whatever happens, happens, m80.
ARE YOU MULTISHIP?: Yes!
WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE SHIP IN YOUR CURRENT FANDOM?: NYXNOCT MOTHERFUCKER HAVE YOU HEARD OF IT--
FINALLY, HOW DOES ONE SHIP WITH YOU?: For the love of god, don’t wait for me. I take 5-10 business week to process a hint, no lie. Ask, chuck a brick at my face, it’s all cool.
Tagged by: @inproelia & @totalxclarity ty <3
Tagging: Pretty sure everyone has done this, so if you haven’t, steal it! 8′D
#MEME LOVING FUCK | ooc#i think this embodies be gay do crime#shippin' the bad ship while the rest of them are gay kek
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