#Just feel like I don't have anyone to talk to anymore : | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

riizegasm · 2 days

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Cherry Waves || H. DM (Taesan)

❀ pairing: boynextdoor taesan x fem!reader (mentions of riize anton)

❀ genre: college!au, fluff, minor crack

❀ word count: ~5.1k

❀ warnings: explicit language, suggestive themes, taesan is a little bit of a loser here (endearingly), slightly ooc!taesan

❀ summary: You don't like Deftones. You like Han Taesan. Han Taesan likes you and Deftones. All it takes is some rock music, a bad college party, and a few broken vinyls for you to reconcile the differences. With stuttered words and an embarrassing amount of blushing, you learn to make it work.

❀ a/n: My first piece with absolutely zero angst! Are you guys proud of me? I absolutely adore this piece, so I hope you guys do as well. As always, likes, replies, and reblogs are encouraged!

masterlist

“Dude, just go talk to her!”

Taesan immediately flushes at the comment, smacking a hand over Jaehyun’s mouth. It doesn’t matter if the music in the party is loud enough to drown out every conversation. He can’t risk anyone else hearing, especially you.

“Shut up,” he hisses, finally releasing his hold on his best friend’s mouth. “What if she hears you?”

Jaehyun cocks an eyebrow. “Do you want her to hear me? HEY Y/N!”

Taesan scrambles to cover Jaehyun’s mouth again, but it’s too late. The damage has already been done.

Your eyes light up when you spot the duo in the kitchen, waving animatedly. Taesan struggles to contain the stampede running through his stomach and the blush overtaking his cheeks. You always look stunning, but there’s something about your baggy jeans and cropped graphic tee that has Taesan swooning. It should be embarrassing, how good he thinks you look, but nothing can overcome the feeling of sheer panic as you begin to approach.

“Myungjae! It’s been forever,” you say, reaching over to pull your friend into a hug.

“I know! It’s weird not having classes together anymore,” Jaehyun responds with a dramatic fake sob.

Your slight giggle is barely audible above the music, but it’s almost as if Taesan’s ears are specifically in tune to you and every sound you make. He silently curses when you turn your eyes to him, a soft smile gracing your face. He knows his face must be fire engine red at this point, simply unable to cope with you being so close.

“Hi Taesan. Long time no see.”

It hasn’t been that long since he’s seen you, but he’s not quite sure how to articulate that without sounding like a total creep. That’s not to say he’s a stalker or anything, but the two of you seem to cross paths quite frequently on campus. You wouldn’t know, of course, since Taesan always ducks for cover any time he spots you coming. Instead of saying that very fact, he opts for a simple smile.

“Yeah, it has. How have you been?” He mentally cheers at his ability to get his sentence out without stuttering. “Jaehyun told me you’ve been pretty busy.”

Your smile grows even brighter, eyes taking on a teasing glint. “You asked about me?”

Even the overly loud bass line can’t vibrate a single cell in Taesan’s body, the man having grown rigid at your question. The short answer is yes. How could he not when even the tiniest glimpse of you has his heart racing in his chest. He knows he can’t say that, though, mouth opening and closing repeatedly as he flounders for an answer.

“I’m just kidding!” You giggle. “But Myungjae is right. I’ve been so busy this semester. My research project is taking up all of my time.”

When Taesan looks to his left, he notices the aforementioned man is nowhere in sight, clearly having abandoned you two. Taesan makes a mental note to beat him up a little bit later. But for now, he just has to focus on not weirding you out.

“Oh! Um, what’s your research project on?”

With the way your eyes brighten underneath the dim purple glow of the party, Taesan wishes he had his camera. He wishes he could simply capture something that showed just how happy you were. For once, he understands why artists spend hours capturing their subjects on canvas. He could fill an entire gallery with paintings dedicated to the light in your eyes and the brightness of your smile.

“It’s on how urbanization and lack of green spaces affect mental health,” you beam. “And I’ve lowkey gotten so much pushback from my professors because they feel like it’s been done before but—oh shit.”

Taesan barely registers the fact that you stopped talking, too engrossed in the delighted expression on your face. But when that drops in favor of a panicked look, he finally snaps out of his reverie. Despite the dim lighting, it’s clear that you’re looking at something, or rather someone. When Taesan turns to figure out exactly what it is, you’re quick to place a hand on his cheek, turning him back to face you instead.

“Don’t look!” You exclaim in a whisper. “It’s my ex. Fuck, fuck, fuck.”

The words take a second for Taesan to digest, still focusing on where your warm palm lays on his cheek.

“Your ex?”

Taesan was vaguely aware of the fact that you were in a relationship about a year or so ago, having heard from Jaehyun about the hardship of your breakup. He didn’t know you back then, but he imagined that it would have made him sick, to see you stupefied in love. He never considered himself the jealous type, but when it came to you, he imagined that even another person looking at you too long would set him off.

“Yeah, shit. He’s coming. I’m about to do something and please just go along with it.”

Taesan flushes when you make eye contact again, your hand making a slow trail from his cheek down to wrap around the back of his neck. He struggles not to moan when your nails begin to play with the small hairs at the nape of his neck. It makes it even worse that he can’t help but track the movement of your mouth as you lick your glossy lips, cheeks pulling upward into a sultry smile. When your other hand places itself gently on his chest, Taesan doesn’t know whether to curse or cheer. A fuzzy feeling is slowly clouding his head, all of the blood in his body having rushed south.

He knows he has to make this believable, though, so he snakes a hand around your waist, thumbing at the bare skin between the waistband of your jeans and the hem of your shirt. It takes all of his resolve not to explode right then and there. How the fuck are you so soft?

“Y/N?”

Your eyes sharpen as they make contact with the tall man rounding the corner. Your hands still stay glued to Taesan, though, not willing to part from the close contact. Your ex seems to notice, judging by the way his eyes scan the points where the two of you are connected.

“Oh, Anton! Didn’t know you’d be here.” Your voice carries a tinge of annoyance as you regard the man. “What’s up?”

Anton stutters out an answer, voice coming out too soft to compete with the noise of the party. You cock your head at his words, not fully able to hear what he’s saying. It’s not like you’d want to, anyways, not with the calloused fingers splayed across the exposed skin of your waist and the soft locks peeking through your fingers. You don’t seem to be the only one who doesn’t want to part, though. This close, it’s easy to feel the heart thundering underneath your palms and the goosebumps rising where your nails tease the skin of a neck. Interesting.

“What was that?” You question, cocking your head cutely.

Anton’s blush is clear despite the colored lighting of the party. “Um, never mind. I’ll see you around, I guess.”

You nod, watching as his overly tall form retreats. Once he’s lost in the throng of people crowding the party, you let out a sigh, shoulders sagging in relief. Taesan remains frozen where you hold him, eyes widened in shock. It’s only when you take in his expression that you realize that the two of you are still connected, rushing to take a step back. Taesan takes a breath when his own hands fall to his sides, chest shaking as he exhales.

“I’m so sorry!” You wince. “But thank you for doing that. He’s, uh, persistent, I’ll say.”

“N-no problem,” Taesan stutters.

Silence lingers between the two of you, except the sultry music of the party makes it not all that silent. Distantly, you hear a call of your name, just barely audible above the smooth melody of the R&B track that blasts from the speakers. You turn to give your friend a quick wave before facing Taesan once again, not surprised to see his gaze trained on the floor.

“I’ll, um, see you around,” you mutter, smoothing a hand down the expanse of his bare arm before leaving to meet your friend.

Taesan remains rooted in place, unmoving for a long few moments. The phantom warmth of your hands against his skin has him shivering, unable to think of anything else. After a moment, he sighs, silently willing his erection away.

. . .

“And then her nails were playing with the hair on the back of my neck, and I swear to god, I was about to cream my pants!”

“Ew,” Woonhak gags as he fiddles with the game controller.

“No talking about how Y/N gave you a boner in front of the baby,” Sungho nags. “Save it for your studio and put it in a song.”

Taesan sticks his tongue out at the older man, always having hated when he puts his motherly persona on. Normally, Taesan isn’t the one to take up all the air in the room discussing his newest infatuation. But after last night, it’s all he can seem to talk about.

He would admit that Sungho has a point if he hadn’t already written three songs in less than twenty four hours just about the feeling of your hands on his skin alone. It’s as if you’re consuming him, quite literally engulfing him in the memory of you. You exist so vividly in his mind, the curl of your smile, the color of your eyes, the sweet scent of your perfume. Just the memory of it all has him wondering if he needs to compose a fourth song right now.

“Where did Jaehyun go?” Donghyun asks after he loses the game, pointedly ignoring Woonhak’s celebratory dance. “I feel like he’s been gone for an hour.”

Sanghyuk barely looks up from his phone, speaking through a mouthful of potato chips. “He went to meet up with Y/N for ice cream. Apparently she was having an emergency or something.”

A complete sense of dread overtakes Taesan’s body, fully frozen in the beanbag he had chosen to sit on. What if your ex had come back? What if he was able to see right through your little act and had come back to try to win you over? What if the two of you were getting back together? Or even worse, what if you were telling Jaehyun about the moment you had yesterday, complaining that Taesan was a creep for liking your touch so much? What if you felt uncomfortable around him?

Worst of all, what if you saw his boner?

He isn’t afforded much longer to stew in his hypotheticals, as Jaehyun chooses that exact moment to come through the door. Instantly, he locks eyes with Taesan, expression curling into an annoying smirk. The younger tries his best to seem nonchalant, but he knows his friend can likely see right through him. He’s never been the most subtle.

“Han Taesan,” Jaehyun practically yells as he approaches the living room, ignoring everyone else in the room. “You son of a bitch!”

Taesan’s eyes widen into saucers, staring down the man as he approaches with the force of a bull. “What?”

Jaehyun continues to smirk, plopping down into the beanbag next to him. “I can’t believe you’ve actually done it. I didn’t know you had it in you.”

“Didn’t know I had what in me?”

“I’m sworn to secrecy,” the man responds, miming zipping his lips shut. “But just know that I’m proud of you, son.”

“I thought I was your son,” Woonhak whines from in front of the tv.

Jaehyun immediately grins, not missing the opportunity to smother the youngest. He moves to go crowd him against the couch, pressing obnoxiously loud kisses all over his face. Donghyun laughs at the antics, happy that it finally gives him a chance to beat Woonhak at the video game. Unfortunately, Taesan isn’t able to laugh, still left reeling over Jaehyun’s earlier comments.

What the hell did he do?

. . .

You take a deep breath, smoothing out your clothes and checking your makeup in your compact mirror. It’s not like you have much to worry about. You know that you look good, having spent an extra twenty minutes getting ready for this exact moment. Thankfully the ten minute walk to get to your destination wasn’t enough to ruin your appearance.

A little bell above the door jingles when you enter the tiny record shop, instantly greeted with the loud riffs of a Deftones song. It’s somewhat jarring and not exactly to your taste, unexpected from a quaint shop near a college campus. But when you remember exactly who works here, it all makes sense.

“Welcome in!” A voice calls from somewhere in the depths of the store.

With all of the stacks of CDs, records, and magazines, it’s impossible to see the majority of the store. But you don’t need to see to know exactly who the voice belongs to. The fact that he’s here brings warmth to your cheeks, forcing you to take a deep breath to keep your composure. You remind yourself that he can’t see you with everything in the way. First thing’s first, you have to fix that.

Inky black hair is the only thing visible when you approach the counter, the worker crouching underneath to unpack some boxes. You try not to laugh when you hear a muffled curse, the cashier clearly displeased.

“Hey Taesan,” you say softly, trying your hardest not to sound as flustered as you feel.

Your response comes in the form of a loud thump, followed by a curse. Before you can react, Taesan is standing to his full height, hand rubbing a spot on the back of his head. His eyes are rounded in surprise, mouth hanging open in half a groan of pain.

“Oh my gosh, are you okay?” You question.

“Y/N,” he breathes. “Yeah, I’m, um, fine. It doesn’t even hurt!”

You bite back a giggle as the man stutters over his words. “Are you sure? It sounded pretty gnarly.”

“No, not at all. I’m good, I swear.” Taesan’s hand finally leaves the back of his head, moving instead to awkwardly scratch the base of his neck. “What are you doing here?”

In reality, you should have known that he was going to ask. It’s a good question, really, because you don’t know. All you know is that Jaehyun mentioned that Taesan worked here and you’ve been working up the courage to drop by ever since. In the week that you’ve been preparing to come, it never crossed your mind to come ready with an excuse.

“Oh! Well…” your eyes scan the area, looking for anything that could be your saving grace. “I was looking for some retro rock albums! I was telling Myungjae and he said I should come here because you work here. He also said you have really good taste, so…”

It’s not completely untrue, which you feel like is better than flat out lying. And seeing the excited smile bloom on Taesan’s face proves just how much it was worth it.

“You’re into rock?” He asks, eyes lit up like a child on Christmas. “Who’s your favorite band?”

Fuck. “Deftones!”

You guess they are your favorite, since they seem to be the only band you recognize as Taesan rambles on about his love of 90s bands. It makes it easier to zone out, tracing the shape of his lips as they form excited syllables and getting lost in the glimmer in his eyes. You were always so attuned to how attractive Taesan is, but seeing him so excited is undoubtedly different. You try your hardest to ignore the continuous fluttering in your chest.

“So?” Taesan asks, drumming his fingers against the wooden counter. “Are you looking for vinyl, cassette, or CD?”

You’re quick to snap out of your reverie, smiling sheepishly. “Vinyl.”

. . .

Taesan swears he must have been a hero in his last life or something. He must have saved kids from a burning orphanage or stopped a war from happening. He must have saved one million trees or stopped robbers from ransacking grandmas’ houses. How else can he explain why he’s been blessed with so much of your presence over the last few weeks?

Every Tuesday and Friday, you waltz into the record store like clockwork, looking like nothing short of a dream. You never really buy anything, which doesn’t bother Taesan, because it means you spend extra time talking to him. He constantly swoons when you laugh at his jokes, perpetually fighting a blush near you. The angelic sounds of your giggles are always heard over the harsh guitar riffs of Deftones, which he makes sure to always have on when you walk in.

You’re giggling now, head tipped back and nose scrunched adorably. Taesan swears that one day he’s going to record the sound and put it in a song. It would just add to the list of countless songs he’s produced about you, a plethora of hard hitting raps and softer rock ballads. He wonders if one day he’ll ever get to play them for you.

“I can’t believe you knocked over the entire display,” you giggle. “Did any of them break?”

Taesan smiles sheepishly. “Let’s just say a huge chunk was cut out of my paycheck to repair the damage.”

It’s hard for Taesan to do anything but stare as you chuckle once again. The tips of his fingers itch to reach out and smooth back the stray pieces of your hair that have freed themselves from your neat style, desperate to make any type of physical contact. He’s craved to feel your soft skin again ever since the party two months ago. He wonders if you’re still just as soft, if your nails would scratch his scalp the same way, if you’d bite your glossy lips as you peered into his eyes again.

“You know, I wish I could work in a place like this. I feel like it would just be perfect since I love music so much,” you gush. “I’ve always wanted to make my own song, but it seems so difficult.”

Taesan lights up at your admission. “I could show you!”

At the cute tilt of your head, he decides to backtrack.

“I mean, I don’t know if you know, but I make music. It’s actually how I met Jaehyun! So, if you’re curious on how to do it, you can drop by the studio sometime and I could show you.”

“Really? You’d do that for me?”

You don’t even know the beginning of what Taesan would do for you, but instead of telling you so, the boy just nods. “Of course.”

The two of you make arrangements for you to stop by the next day, Taesan fighting a smile as you give him your number so he can send the address.

He ends up using it for more than that, the two of you chatting via text for the rest of the afternoon. You try your best to dismiss it as him just being friendly, ignoring the heat that rises to your cheeks every time your phone goes off with a new notification. It’s right before you leave for your morning class that you get another one, causing you to snort out a laugh:

See you in the music building on the second floor! Lmk if you get lost. That would suck :(

The music building is one of the oldest buildings on campus, its ivy-covered brick exterior serving as a trademark of your school. But when you push through the grandiose front doors, you realize that the inside is actually much nicer than you had expected. Sleek linoleum floors are polished so well that they practically serve as mirrors, reflecting the light from the opulent overhead fixtures. Even the staircase is nice, its carved wooden railing cold to the touch as you ascend to the second floor. Pretty signs make studio 2N easy enough to find, tucked at the end of a long hallway.

It’s only as you approach the door that your nerves begin to show themselves. You knock on the studio door with sweaty palms, hating the way that your heart hammers in your chest. The feeling of being so nervous before you see Taesan has become increasingly familiar as you both have spent more and more time together. Despite the number of visits you have paid to the record store, your body has never stopped kicking into overdrive at the thought of seeing him.

Before you can knock again, the studio door swings open, a tall figure standing in the doorway. He’s bathed in blue light from the LEDs that hang along the walls, creating a halo around his dark locks. A pair of thick black glasses frame his eyes, softening his normally intimidating look. When he breaks into a smile, you find yourself doing the same, mirroring his infatuated expression.

“You made it,” he says softly, motioning you inside.

The door is heavy when it falls shut behind you, leaving the both of you in a blue bathed silence.

“I did,” you reply, looking around at the various recording equipment strewn around the space. “This place is incredible.”

Taesan shoots you a closed lipped smile, sitting down at a desk on the far side of the room. He motions to a comfy looking chair next to him, smiling fully when you sit down next to him.

“Thanks. Jaehyun and I got special permission to decorate it and make it more of our own. I feel like it makes it easier to get the creative juices flowing, you know?”

You have no idea, no longer having paid attention after the first word. It’s too easy to get lost in the way Taesan’s mouth moves as he speaks, something you have found happening over and over again whenever you see each other. You thank the divine that he hasn’t seemed to notice your habit.

“Oh!” Taesan interrupts his own ramblings. “We also have a fridge. Do you want anything? Water, juice, beer?”

“You guys can have beer in here?”

Taesann smirks as he approaches the fridge. “Nope. Catch!”

The can is ice cold when it falls into your hands, serving as a cool refuge for the otherwise clammy surface. You wait until Taesan settles back next to you to crack the drink open, smiling when he bumps his can against yours in a silent cheers.

Being with Taesan in his studio proves to be extremely different from being with him in the record store. He’s clearly in his element here, showing you what each button of his complex equipment does as he stacks sounds on top of each other. He even asks for your input, seeing what you like best before adding it to the track. The beer also seems to help ease his nerves, no longer a stuttering mess whenever he addresses you.

It makes the time that passes feel like nothing as the two of you work on the song. A couple of hours in, you both have created an entire instrumental track, just waiting for lyrics to complete it.

“Who knew you were such a good producer?” Taesan asks as he saves and closes out of the track. “You must have been an artist in your past life.”

You roll your eyes at the joke, cracking a smile at the boy’s antics. When you glance back at the screen, however, the smile instantly dissipates from your face.

“Taesan,” you breathe. “What’s that?”

The man in question follows your gaze where it is trained on his computer screen, clearly stuck on a folder that is simply labeled with your name. He feels his heart rising into his throat, rushing to open up a new window to hide the folder.

“N-nothing,” he stammers, but judging by your expression, he knows it’s too late. “I promise it’s not anything weird or creepy or anything! Shit, that makes it sound more creepy. But it’s not, I swear.”

“Taesan,” you repeat slowly, “what was that?”

The man buries his face into his hands, groaning loudly before looking at you again. “Fuck, you’re gonna think I’m such a loser.”

You choose not to respond to that, motioning at his computer again. Even in the artificial blue light, you can see the color that begins to rise to his cheeks. In any other situation, you’d consider it cute, but you’re still not sure whether or not to be creeped out.

Taesan sighs, double clicking the folder to reveal a plethora of untitled files. You try your best to see what they are, or what they could contain, but Taesan opens one before you get a chance. It brings you right back to his producing software, a track beginning to load.

“Just listen.”

The melody that plays is hard hitting, a little jarring in the small space. There’s a strong drum beat for a moment, only to be slowed down right before a voice starts rapping.

Taesan keeps his eyes firmly trained on the floor as the song plays, trying his hardest not to cringe at his own lyrics. He goes on and on about the way you laugh, the color of your eyes, the swell of your hips. In the chorus, he highlights how much he wants to be yours, how perfect you are. It all repeats until the end, where he confesses how perfect he could be for you.

When the song ends, neither of you move, letting an oppressive silence linger in the small space. You don’t even notice the way your mouth has hung open until you feel a slight pain in your jaw. Despite it, you can’t seem to keep your mouth closed, continually floundering for words.

“You wrote that?” You question, voice barely coming out as a whisper.

Taesan simply nods.

“About me?”

When the boy nods a second time, you can’t help but stand from the chair, taking the two steps necessary to stand in front of him. He’s clearly startled when you place a hand on his shoulder, eyes tracing your figure as he looks up. The light of the computer screen is reflected in his eyes, making them appear as if they are sparkling.

“You like me?”

Taesan swallows thickly at your question, nodding again slowly. He goes to look away, but you place a hand under his jaw, preventing him from turning.

“Why didn’t you say anything?”

“Because,” Taesan whispers. “You’re you and I’m me. I like you so much, but you’re, like, so out of my league. I didn’t want you to laugh at me.”

You can’t help the giggle that escapes at the boy’s confession. But it immediately dies in your throat when Taesan squeezes his eyes shut, looking on the verge of tears. You instantly scramble to reassure him.

“No, I promise I’m not laughing because of that,” you coo. “It’s just…why do you think I kept coming by the record store?”

Taesan opens his eyes, glistening with unshed tears. “Because you like Deftones…?”

“Oh my god!”

You can’t help but fully laugh this time, releasing Taesan’s face in favor of squeezing onto his lap. His mouth drops into a soft “o” as you settle in, hands frozen awkwardly on the arm rests. You take his surprise as an opportunity to snake a hand around the back of his neck, letting your nails scratch at the base of his skull like they did months prior.

“Taesan,” you whisper. “I don’t like Deftones.”

“You don’t?”

“Nope. I like you.”

You wish you had a camera to capture Taesan’s expression at the moment when what you’re saying clicks for him. It takes a moment, the words seemingly churning in his head before their meaning becomes apparent. His head cocks to the side, eyes no longer glistening with unshed tears, but rather sparkling with disbelief.

“You like me?”

The chuckle that escapes you is dripping with fondness, your hands tightening where they rest around Taesan’s shoulders. “Yes. I like you a lot.”

“I also like you a lot.”

You playfully roll your eyes. “You already mentioned that part.”

Taesan still looks nervous, hands clearly fumbling as he decides whether or not it’s okay to touch you. “So…what now?”

You inch forward, slowly minimizing the already small distance between the two of you. It’s close enough that you can feel Taesan’s shaky breath, warm as it fans your face. He goes a little cross eyed as he tries to maintain eye contact, clearly still startled at the newfound close contact.

“Now you kiss me.”

There’s a brief hesitation, the tiniest moment in which Taesan’s eyes flicker down to your lips before meeting your gaze once more. But then, he immediately surges forward to close the distance between you two, his soft lips blanketing yours. It’s a timid, chaste kiss that only lasts a few seconds before he pulls away.

“Taesan,” you whisper, as if not wanting the words to escape the cocoon that you have created with your bodies. “Kiss me again.”

And he does. He kisses you again and again until your hands travel to his cheeks, keeping him in place. It allows you to kiss him deeper, savoring the warm feeling of his mouth on yours.

Despite his shy nature, Taesan seems anything but inexperienced as he finally relaxes into the kiss. His hands slowly migrate from the arm rests to your hips, hands smoothing along the fabric of your jeans. He strikes a comfortable balance between the gentle way he kisses and the firm groping of your body.

Just when you start to lose yourself in the feeling, he pulls away, leaving both of you panting.

“Wait, Y/N…let me play you another song.”

With a little bit of shuffling and clicking, Taesan finds the audio file he's looking for, kiss-swollen lips settling into a satisfied grin. He leans back to observe you as he presses play, letting a melody flow through the speakers.

You're my girl

And that's alright

If you sting me, I won't mind

'Cause you're my girl

And that's alright

If you sting me, I won't mind.

.FIN.

#boynextdoor imagines #boynextdoor #boynextdoor smut #boynextdoor fluff #bnd #han taesan #han taesan imagines #written in the stars

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toriangeli · 3 days

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-Biggest note, finally, FINALLY we have seen the real Armand. I'm not just talking about his heartbreaking speech in the Louvre, I'm talking about his increasingly unhinged behavior and especially that flashback moment where Daniel is remembering him asking him why he's so fascinating. -Is it insane that Claudia's suffering is more upsetting to me than anyone else's? I think it hits closer to home when it's a woman. That, or maybe they're oversaucing the pudding. Like, we get it, she's Super Tragic. Can we process -Santiago sulking in his dressing room while Claudia is onstage. They should have formed an alliance from the start to get this act off the stage. -Man this episode does make me remember how insufferably snobby Louis was in the book. Thank god they've got Jacob playing him. -I adore them showing coven politics. Love love love. Could Armand have prevented it? I mean, obviously, if he could put the entire coven to sleep in an instant. But they are clearly setting up the impetus to be more complicated than many make it out to be. -Daniel says "Yah" to Louis asking if he wants to know what Dreamstat felt like. -"He's not that attractive." Bro. I'm not even a dudes kinda lady and even I know he's hot. -HE CALLED HIM A BUFFOON OMG -I think Rashid, on orders from James, mixed in those photos with Louis' to cause an argument and allow Daniel more time with the files he was sent. -I wondered if they were going to find one of Marius' paintings in the Louvre, but finding one of Armand/Amadeo is even better (because Marius is...not mediocre, but definitely not Louvre material). -"Who am I, Louis? Am I my history I have endured? Am I the job I do not want? I am not sure anymore. No one has painted me in over 400 years." Oh god for them to address Armand's identity issues this directly--he is fully aware of that emptiness and openly seeks to fill it. He's begging Louis for it. -Then to turn around and show this authoritarian side to him, FUCK YES. -Starting to venture closer to the theory that Louis has been telling the lie of him being the one who slit Lestat's throat for so long that he has come to believe it. -Jesus. I know Dreamstat isn't even real and doesn't have feelings, but I still feel for him. -This scene where Louis advises Armand. People are seeing is as being more sinister than I'm seeing it. There are definitely power plays, but nothing Armand pushes back on. I don't think he's doing this because he fancies being Lestat, though I'm as perplexed as anyone by his reaction to Armand's story. But I think here, he's giving Armand a place to vent, to be vulnerable, to safely express fear for the first time in well over a century. I do think it snowballs by the time we get to Dubai (hence Jacob talking about Louis becoming "the Lestat" in his relationship with Armand), but here, Armand seems deeply reassured. Contrast their argument in the bedroom, where Armand is immediately concerned with who to blame because he doesn't want the argument he knows is coming. That instant anticipation of the argument isn't a great sign. But the one moment in the 1940's that's a sign of how toxic it's likely to get? Louis called Armand by the name Armand said he went by as a slave, which he could not be sure was his birth name. That's taking the BDSM fantasy too far. Other than that? Every time Armand starts to spiral emotionally in the conversation, Louis redirects him, and it genuinely seems to make Armand feel better. What I don't like is that Louis has stepped back into a persona he doesn't like. At this juncture, it's more unhealthy for Louis than for Armand. Though as we see, it seems to become equally unhealthy for them both. -That being said, some people are still weirdly insistent that Armand is secretly 100% in control of everything ever, in spite of the mounting evidence that it's not the case. Just because he can put his coven to sleep for 15 seconds without breaking a sweat doesn't mean he's some kind of puppet master. There's only one of him.

Next week: finally getting truly unhinged Armand omg.

#iwtv #amc iwtv #interview with the vampire #iwtv amc #iwtv spoilers #louis de pointe du lac #lestat de lioncourt #armand #daniel molloy #claudia de pointe du lac

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r0-boat · 1 day

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Whb Omegaverse AU headcanons

Reader is an omega for this specific post! Because all of you are bottoms/j

Nsfw

Cw: dubcon heavy dubcon, implications of noncon, Omegaverse dynamics.

Oh no

Being an omega in whb is something I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy. You already need demon cum to survive now you just need demon dick to survive your heat. I don't think all devils and hell are just not going to take advantage of you during your heat where your vulnerable and wanting.

Devils are in a weird middle ground where they are neither Alpha, Omega nor Beta But the same time all of them. It's weird because they have a completely different scent that feels like an alpha however can also have a calming scent as an omega. They have Alpha ruts and Omega heats. And they can mark anyone as their mate as they please. They can have multiple mates but a lot of devils only choose one.

To prevent you from getting mated you have to put on a indestructible bite proof collar. It has the power to withstand Lucifer with his vampiric teeth so I think you're safe. Especially because demons have sharper teeth.

Fear for your safety in Abaddon. Like never go outside without your heat suppressants it's not like that will really work because devils will still smell you even with suppressants. And only Kings can withstand the scent of a delicious human in heat. Other devils even sometimes nobles are weak to the scent. Good luck protecting yourself when one of them is in that rut. I guess you're only other option is just always have a trusted devil with you when you go outside.

By the way demon ruts are far more intense than human Alpha. Like I'm talking fighting in the street. Starting brawls in Bars. Yes Kings can hold back when they can smell you in heat but that doesn't mean they do. They're demons, and that means extra devil energy for you. :) You're done for.

Demons from Abyssos and Abaddon are the only exceptions if they sense that you're in heat they becomes a feral animal, hell bent on marking you. You better run from Beel and Bael

Bael is an interesting case. To appear kingly he tries so hard to reject the animalistic drive to pounce on you. And he actually tries to avoid you. Until he can't take the tightness in his pants anymore.

Beel will break into your room through the window to have his way with you like the creature of the night he is.

The Kings start a passive aggressive war on each other by scenting. At first it was just a way to protect you and ward off angels. Then Levi the last meeting scent it you right in front of Satan Even though he just did that, Levi even went the extra mile making sure he covered up every spot Satan scented. The next time you ever visit him he will make sure you REEK of his scent.

On a lighter note I'm pretty sure everything would be so endearing to you when you're starting to nest. Demons would send you gifts of the finest material to make into your nest. To any devil it would be an honor to add his clothing into your nest because you just simply think They smell good. Even though you'll try to nest and secluded spot You're a little nesting spot will be found out and protected like their lives depended on it. Driving away any other devils that are too persistent or angels also drawn to your scent.

Devils with strong provider instinct like mammon would be worsen during the heat. These devils are the ones giving you gifts. Especially food.

Satan is growling and barking being your little guard dog. Anyone touches you They are dead. He inspects any gifts you are given. Beel it's already in your nest (He's ready when you are) Levi is about to bust a blood vessel just about to throw all these demons out. He knows that you need to be alone and only you can decide who can come in to your own nest (a rare moment of clarity for Levi?!)

Lucifer is trying so hard to hold back to your pheromones. Angels can smell them but they cannot feel the pull of your irresistible scent. Now that he has a fallen angel and the devil He is not quite used to smelling you. And he is trying to resist.

Minhyeok is an alpha, and he's been getting by on his ruts by just running into the stuff that smells like you, your underwear your dirty clothes, That damn chair. Now that you're gone he's starting to go through shampoo and lotion you use. Ruts are getting harder and harder to go through and he needs you so bad. Before you were taken to hell He always subconsciously thought you were his omega even though he hasn't mated you yet. Since you always smelled like him which he liked because deterred alphas.

#smut #whb #whb x reader #wihib #what in hell is bad #omegaverse #what in “hell” is bad?

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mayajadewrites · 2 days

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could've been you - shouta aizawa, keigo takami

✦ synopsis: You're the new teacher at UA with a rocky past with one of their beloved teachers, Shouta Aizawa aka Eraserhead. You'd rather never see him again but alas, such is life. You also meet Keigo, aka Hawks, who is the opposite of Aizawa. Smiley, golden retriever energy.

✦ chapter content warnings: angst hehe

✦ relationships: aizawa x fem!reader, hawks x fem!reader

ao3

TAG LIST:

@come-away-with-me87, @kxshdoll, @evilsanzu, @friendly-neighborhood-turtle, @lili-pond,

@the-unhinged-raccoon @falling4fandoms @cherry-cosmoz @kkgraham @big-denki-energy @aphrodite-xoxo @keiweeny @minminroie

chapter nine

Your heart starts to race.

The space where Keigo once was is now empty. His duffle bag - gone. You stand up so quick you almost fall over.

You check your phone. No text.

2:45 AM.

You press his contact and call 1, 2, 3, then 10 times.

No answer.

Tears well up in your eyes as you accept this fate - that Keigo snuck out. Left you.

You tried climbing back into bed but you can't sleep.

You put your softed robe on and pad to Aizawa's door. It's late, sure, but he's probably awake.

And you still don't have his number so this is how you communicate.

You knock on the door as quietly as you can, careful not to wake up anyone else on your floor.

After a few knocks, the door opens.

Aizawa rubs his eye before finally looking at you. He can tell you've been crying.

"What happened?" He grabbed you by your shoulders and brought you into his place.

You didn't answer - you couldn't. How could you explain that you just let a man fuck you and he left?

"Please talk to me." Aizawa's voice was soft now as he set next to you on the couch.

"Keigo left." You sniffle.

"Left? Left to where? What do you mean?"

"We had sex, fell asleep and then he left. He didn't leave a note or anything! I called, no answer."

Aizawa's eyebrows almost reached the top of his forehead. "He didn't say goodbye? No explanation?"

"No. His bag is gone. He's gone."

Shouta's face was full of anger. You observed his body language - he was tense.

But then he held you. No words were exchanged. His body heat was against yours as his body mended into yours.

His hair was pulled back into a low bun - your favorite. He pulled you on top of him so your back was on his chest.

You took a deep breath as his arms tightened around you, almost like a weighted blanket. He kissed the top of your head as your eyes started to feel heavy.

"I'm sorry, Shouta." You murmured as your eyes began to close.

"For what?" His calloused hand caressed the soft skin on your cheek.

You mouth parted as a quiet snore left your lips.

When you woke up the next morning, you were in a bed.

Not your bed.

Your face is buried in a large, soft pillow with a dark gray pillowcase. The blankets are shades of gray and black, the fabric so soft against your skin.

You heard the sizzling of oil in a pan, along with soft music playing through the apartment.

"Good morning." You emerged from the bedroom, watching Shouta cook breakfast. "Hope I didn't wake you."

He was shirtless, his hair up again, flipping a pancake with a spatula.

You shook your head as you yawned, padding towards the kitchen. Shouta half-smiled as you approached him. He wanted to kiss you so bad. He wanted to take you on the counter, pulling your hair as he watched your ass cheeks jiggle against his cock.

"You didn't." You looked down at your robe that you were still wearing. "I'm gonna grab clothes from my place quick, I don't want to wear this robe anymore."

"You can wear something of mine." Shouta walked to his room, opening a drawer with crewnecks folded perfectly, then another drawer with sweatpants.

He handed you the clothing, your nose instantly recognizing the scent of Shouta.

"I'll leave you to it." He turned around and went back to cooking.

As you changed into his clothes you couldn't help but notice the feeling in your stomach. Butterflies fluttering.

A feeling you haven't really felt with Keigo. Especially with the shit he pulled.

Speaking of Keigo, you checked your phone to see if he text you.

You had 40 missed calls from him, 55 texts.

Why even bother reading them? He left you with no communication. It takes 4 seconds to say goodbye.

You make Shouta's bed for him, laying the pillows nicely along the headboard. You left your phone on his nightstand to join him in the kitchen.

Shouta served you your breakfast with an iced coffee - he remembered from when you were observing his class how you liked it.

"Thank you." You dug your fork into your pancakes, letting the sweet taste hit your tongue. "I didn't take you for a cook, Eraser."

"I'm full of surprises." He smirked, his half lidded eyes finding yours.

You heard a hand banging on a door a couple doors down from Shouta.

Your room.

Both you and Shouta walk to the door, him opening it as his body rested against your back.

And there you saw a peek of red feathers.

"Leave." You stepped out of the doorway. "You took all your stuff already, so you're free to go."

"I'm sorry I didn't say anything to you, that was a mistake. I-"

"She said to leave." Shouta emerged from the doorway, standing behind you again. "You didn't have the decency to say goodbye, it's embarrassing that you even try to show your face here again."

"I was on call, there was an attack, I had to-"

"All of which I would have understood if you used your words and told me. You may be a grown man but you act like a child." You press your back to Shouta's muscular chest for comfort. "Only an absolute asshole fucks someone and dips in the middle of the night. That will be the last time you're ever inside of me." You turned on your heel to walk back into Shouta's place.

"Baby bird, I-"

"She was pretty clear on what she wanted. If I see you here again, you will have hell to pay."

After a few minutes, Keigo left. You heard his heavy footsteps walk out of the building, then he took flight into the air. You watched from the window, but he didn't look back.

"Stupid fucking bird." Shouta sucked his teeth as he took a sip of his coffee. "You're gonna stay with me today. He's probably gonna try to come back later."

You didn't bother to argue. "Okay."

It really bothered Shouta that Keigo left you at such a vulnerable time. It's scary giving yourself to someone and then they leave. It fucks with the psyche.

"You know, I never got your number." You looked at Shouta as he cleaned the kitchen.

"Because you told me I was never getting yours."

"Well, I changed my mind." You crossed your awms over your chest.

"Hm, what makes you think I want your number?"

"Come on, Eraser." You grab his muscular arm, wrapping both of your arms around it. "You know you can't resist me."

"Tch." He rolled his eyes, but still smiled. "You just like my place more than yours."

"It's cozy, unlike you. You have these hard muscles that are terrible to lay on." You looked up at him with your doe, Disney princess eyes.

"They're good for other things." He smirked as he picked you up by your waist, sitting you on the counter.

You can't help but smile as he cages your hips with his forearms, his chocolate eyes boring into yours.

"You're cute from up here." You tuck a piece of his hair behind your ear.

"You're cute in my clothes." Shouta's thumb traced circles on your plush thigh. "Your ass looks way better in them than mine does."

You playfully slap his arm, hooking your ankles together to pull him closer to you.

The feeling of Shouta being so close to you makes your stomach flip with a mixture of butterflies and anxiety.

It was so easy to kiss Keigo, but you're more excited when you're around Shouta.

You were expecting him to go in for a kiss, but instead he rubbed his nose on yours, interlacing his fingers around your ass.

It was an intimate moment. No pressure, no fear of him leaving.

Your memories with Shouta begin to flood your mind, how he betrayed you. How he didn't listen to you. How he assisted in putting you in a coma.

Can the past truly stay in the past? Can you look beyond what was done?

You sigh and wrap your arms around his neck, letting your body fall into him.

You will try.

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moonlightazriel · 6 hours

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Chapter 19: It feels cold and empty /// Azriel X F!Reader

Summary: They try to adjust to a life where they don't have each other anymore.

Word Count: 3K

Warnings: Angst, mentions of fighting and suicide.

Notes: if you're triggered by suicide scenes, please don't read this. If you're not, please enjoy..

Main Masterlist

Worlds Apart Masterlist

She nervously picked at the cuticles of her nails, every pair of eyes watching her curiously, not a word being said since she had been sitting in the council room of Aelin Galathynius’s castle for the last thirty minutes. The double doors burst open and she recoiled into herself further at the sight of Manon’s golden eyes, looking around the room until they landed on her.

“Where the hell have you been?” Her queen’s voice reverberated through the chambers and she took a deep breath.

“It’s a very long story.” Manon nodded, sitting on the empty chair by Aelin’s side.

“We have plenty of time, I actually cleared my schedule for the day.” The younger queen winked at her, she could sense the curiosity pouring out of Aelin since her sentries had brought her there, Meraxes somewhere she didn’t know.

“I don’t even know where I should start..” She took a moment to recompose her breath and looked at the face of her own queen once more. “Let’s start with the golden eyes of a King.”

Manon, Aelin and Rowan didn’t say a thing as she recalled everything that had happened on the time she was away, in too many details she described Velaris and the kindness of the faes she met there, she talked about the powerful wings and the bravery of a new type of people she met. The curses of this land in the hands of the middle born Valg King. She told them how Mantyx went there and how they, just like Elena once did, failed to kill him and sealed him and let the problem to those who would come after them.

She told them how using the powers of Celeste and the cauldron, they broke the seal and killed him in his own home, preventing him from conquering Prythian like he intended to do since the beginning. She talked about the key and the gate, reassuring them that it would never be a problem as they didn’t have any interest in leaving their own world behind.

She talked about the good friends she made, and how she would miss them dearly but she knew she had to come home. She didn’t say anything about Azriel to them, a selfish part of her didn’t want to share him with anyone, he was hers and hers only to keep tucked away in her heart forever, where he would never be hurt and unloved again.

“We’re glad to have you back.” Rowan said after she was done, nodding his head toward the female, his trained eye on the tattoo on her arm, as she nervously rolled her sleeves up, revealing the drawing to them.

“This world you described, it somehow feels familiar, when i close my eyes i can get a glimpse of beautiful stars and snow covered mountains.” Aelin stated, like a distant dream that bubbled in her mind, she had seen it when she was falling through the worlds, the male had helped her stop so she wouldn’t miss her home.

“I can’t even imagine all of that, but as Rowan said, we’re happy to have you back, we should go back home.” Manon said, rising from her seat and thanking Aelin for having them there. Y/N did the same, following her queen outside.

She almost laughed at the thought of calling this her home, as once someone said to her that home is where your heart is, and her was worlds apart from her, with the Shadowsinger she gave it to, the male she would love until the last day she walked this earth, maybe not even death would be enough to erase her love for him.

As she crossed the busy streets, she couldn’t avert her gaze from the statue built for them, their faces sculpted in stone, their swords raised together towards the stars, written in a beautiful handwritten at the base of the statue, she could read.

“From now until the darkness claims us. In honour of the brave warriors that gave their life for this land.” Asterin in the middle of them, leading them to the battle. She hated it, she despised the reminder of the family she lost, the people she never stood a chance of saving, she hated the reminder that no matter what she did differently that day, she could not change their sacrifice. She hated it because it reminded her of how, late at night between sobs, she wished the darkness would claim her too just so all the pain would be gone.

She found Meraxes sat by Abraxo’s side, his eyes distant, looking at where once a gap stood, like he too missed that land. But as Y/N climbed his leg, adjusting herself into the seat, she mumbled to him to forget that. They would never come back, and then, he carried them back to the Witch Kingdom.

⋆˙⟡☾𖤓☽ ⟡˙⋆

“It’s been four months.” Feyre said, rubbing Nyx’s hair out of his eyes.

“I guess locking him up at the House of Wind won’t work this time.” Nesta remarked, making Feyre roll her eyes at her. The inner circle sat at the dining table in the River House,worried about Azriel’s declining state.

Ever since she left, he had been sadder, angrier, snapping at anyone who dared to show a little bit of concern towards him. They could never imagine what it felt like, knowing your mate, getting to love her and having her falling in love with you too, just for her to be gone, to never come back.

“What if he tries something?” Elain asked, Lucien held her hand in a reassuring grip.

“We won’t allow it.” He said, Lucien was the one trying the hardest to look out for Azriel, because his best friend would be pissed with him if he didn’t try, she would want her mate to be as fine as he possibly could, and Lucien would ensure that for her.

“We could kidnap her back.” Cassian suggested and the whole table turned to him, looking at him like he had three heads.

“Oh Mother, we’re not kidnapping someone, what are we? Hybern?” Rhysand said, eyeing his brother with a glint of amusement in his eyes. “Azriel needs time, how much time he deems fit to get better, all we can do is pray to the Mother that he gets well soon, and show him that we’re here for him.”

“Talking about it..” Elain said getting up, fixing her skirts and nodding towards Lucien. “I’ll check on him.” She grabbed her mate’s hand, receiving an approving nod from Rhys, they winnowed to the House of Wind.

His room was dark and quiet, Azriel lay with his face pressed to his pillows, a dry trail of tears down his cheeks, his hair was messy, his shadows gathered around him quietly, like they too didn’t have the motivation to move.

“Az.” Elain called, crouching in front of his eyes, those hazel orbs that had once radiated life once, were dull and glassy, he didn’t even greet her. “I brought something for you to eat, I’ll open the curtains and Lucien will help you shower, okay?” She said in a cheerful voice, but the male kept quiet.

Elain did as she told, opening the curtains to let some sunshine enter his chambers, he hissed and she took it as a good sign that he could still feel something at least. She removed the covers from him, the blankets disappearing as the house helped her to get his room clean.

“Okay, time to shower.” Lucien said, him and Elain supporting his body, dragging the defeated male towards the bathroom. Elain thanked Lucien for his help as she left the two alone. Lucien didn’t even bother anymore, he had done the same for Tamlin a while ago, so he stripped Azriel naked, letting the male soak in the warmth of the bath the house prepared.

Lucien rubbed shampoo in his scalp, watching as slowly his shoulders started to shake and broken sobs parted his lips. He didn’t know what to say but he would wait if, for once, Azriel felt like talking today. Lucien almost gasped in surprise when the male, in fact, spoke.

“I feel pathetic.” He breathed and Lucien raised an eyebrow. “Four months depending on others because i can’t get a fucking grip.” He sounded angry, hurt.

“There’s no shame in needing help.” Lucien gently replied, washing the bubbles from his hair. “When I lost Jesminda, I thought I would never recover from it.. The days blurred into months, the months into years of being stuck into a horrific void..”

“How did you get out?” He choked in his own tears.

“I didn’t, not fully, and I don't think I ever will. My heart belonged to her, and a part always will, despite me loving Elain with all I have.” Lucien took another deep breath. “When I saw you and Elain together, I found myself back inside that void, sinking into it and letting it consume me.”

“I never apologised for what I did, you’re a good male, you didn’t deserve all the pain we both put you through.” Azriel turned his head to face Lucien, the male just shook his head.

“You took care of her when I couldn't, you gave her a choice, you helped pull her out of that void. I’m not saying it didn’t hurt seeing you two, cuz it felt like my soul was being ripped away from me, I’m saying that I’m willing to look past all of this because she’s worth it, love is always worth it, and if it meant she would be happy, I would go through all of this again, even if she never chose me, just to ensure she would be happy.”

“How would you live, knowing that you can’t have your mate?” Azriel dared to ask and Lucien seemed to think for a while.

“I would just keep going, like I always did. And you should too, I never took you for the kind of male that would give up on life like this.” Lucien nudged him with his hand and Azriel allowed a barely there smile to appear in his face.

“I should talk to you more often.” He snorted. “Thank you for looking out for me.” Azriel said with all the honesty he had in his heart.

“It’s for her.” Lucien confessed and Azriel nodded.

“Yeah, cuz she’s worth it.” He repeated and Lucien nodded. “I think I can assume from here.” Lucien nodded, getting up and leaving the bathroom to give him some time.

“I would never allow you to sacrifice your happiness for me.” Elain said as she spotted him, her eyes filled with tears. Lucien pulled her close.

“We don’t have to think about it anymore, we’re together and that’s all that matters.” He gently kissed her temple and the female nodded, the two sitting in the window, waiting for Azriel to get out of the bathroom.

When he did, she could swear he was a new male, freshly shaved and looking less tired, his cheeks were still hollow and he had bigger dark circles than ever, but she looked better, the talk with Lucien had really helped.

“Come eat something.” Elain gestured towards the plate in his study desk and he nodded, sitting down and eating like he hadn't done in months.

“Thank you two, for everything.” He said, his voice muffled by the food.

“Just doing what you did for me all those months ago.” Elain winked and grabbed Lucien’s hand. “We’re going back to the River House, you don’t have to, but if you want, meet us there.” The male nodded, watching as his friends disappeared, he would go back to his life, he would learn how to live without her again.

⋆˙⟡☾𖤓☽ ⟡˙⋆

“What the fuck were you thinking?” Fenrys growled, holding an ice filled cloth to her swollen face.

“He was fucking annoying.” She mumbled, wiping the blood on her sleeve.

“And you had to start a fight with him?” He offered her a cloth, but she declined.

“Asking gently didn’t work the first time, he had to learn.” She simply replied, her head throbbing, she was tired of that conversation.

“I know you left some important people behind, but you can’t keep like this, you’re not even alive anymore.” He shouted, ever since she came back, she had stopped eating, every night she would go out, and find someone dumb enough to start a fight with her, or she would lock herself in her room, screaming as Gods knows what plagued her dreams. She never failed her duty though. Every morning she would appear impeccable, ready to do whatever she was ordered to.

“You don’t know what you’re talking about.” She got up, face to face with him. Fenrys scoffed.

“Do you think she would be proud? Asterin would be ashamed of you.” He said, the anger getting the best of him, seeing his friend wasting her life like this. But at the sight of her defeated expression and tear filled eyes, he regretted it. “I didn’t mea…”

“FUCK YOU, FENRYS!” She yelled in his face, turning away from him and marching. She seemed to remember something, because she turned around, the fat tear streaming down her bruised face. “It wasn’t just some important friends that i left behind, i left my mate behind, maybe this means something to you.”

Fenrys froze, mates were really precious in fae culture, for her to be here without him, having the strength to leave him behind, she was in so much pain, and he just made everything worse by throwing her biggest fear on her face, the fear of disappointing Asterin.

Y/N walked back to the castle, feeling her body numb, the pain in her chest too overwhelming to even feel the cold winds making her shiver. She marched towards her room, she opened the window, feeling the breeze messing her hair that had overgrown.

She just wanted it all to be gone, all the pain, all the sadness, everything. She closed her eyes shut, climbing the railing of the balcony. Maybe he wouldn’t feel anything, so far away from her. The winds were stronger, like they tried to push her back to the safety of her room. She took a deep breath.

“From now until the darkness claims us.” She breathed, feeling the air leave her lungs. That was when she allowed her body to lean forward, the sweet embrace that awaited for her and would bring her the relief she desperately wanted was all she had in mind.

She didn't register the loud horrific roar that ripped the skies, awakening the whole castle. She just felt her body being violently pushed backwards, the air getting knocked out of her lungs as her back hit the stone wall with full force. She opened her eyes, feeling her head spin, the whole room with it as dizziness set over her.

Someone grabbed at her, checking up on her head that bled due to the impact. She heard voices, but the consciousness slipped away from her grasp rather quickly. Until she let it claim her, pulling her into a soft embrace.

⋆˙⟡☾𖤓☽ ⟡˙⋆

“What’s wrong, Elain?” Lucien asked as he saw the white orbs of his mate. The female shivered.

“She tried to kill herself.” She mumbled and the whole table went still, turning towards her. Azriel felt his heart squeeze in his chest. “And she will try again.” Elain said, her voice laced with sorrow. Two more months had passed since she departed, Azriel was better, back to training and to his duties, but this had dragged him back to that void.

“I’m so sorry to hear that.” Rhys said, he truly was, but they couldn’t do anything.

“We need to go get her.” Nesta replied, already ready to jump through the gates to get her friend back.

“We can’t, remember that she chose to go.” He stared at the angry frown on Nesta’s face, he could feel it pouring out of her but she didn’t say anything to him, he should’ve known better than this.

Cassian watched as everyone finished dinner, going back to their rooms and houses. He watched as Nesta prepared herself for bed, he almost laughed at her antics, she thought she was sneaky, but he knew her better than herself, so as she pretended to be asleep. He got their bags ready.

Later that night, he heard her, slowly lifting from bed, shuffling through their things, quietly mumbling a curse, he kept pretending he was sleeping. He was quick to change into his leathers, sheathing his swords and walking to the living room, sitting in the dark, waiting for his mate.

Nesta gasped when the lights flickered on and she spotted her mate, sitting with two bags at his feet and a big grin spreading across his face. From behind him, surprise filled her at the sight of Elain in pants, her hair braided behind her back, a bag strapped to her shoulders, flanked by both Lucien and Azriel.

“We know you.” She had said and Nesta smiled at her family.

“How are we getting the key?” Lucien asked, and his sister in law just closed her eyes, focusing on that call, pulling it towards her, the same way she had done with the troves. The key appeared in her hands and she grinned.

“Like calls like.” She winked at them, strapping her bag on her shoulder before they winnowed away to Ramiel. As they opened the balcony door, to get easier to go, they spotted Rhysand. He was wearing his sleeping clothes, and was rubbing his temples.

“You’re all so predictable.” He sighed. “I’ll close my eyes for five seconds, and you all better be gone before I open them again. I don’t want to see you here, not without her.” He heard Nesta cheering, feeling the winds change around him as they all winnowed back, to get her home.

⋆˙⟡☾𖤓☽ ⟡˙⋆

Taglist: @fieldofdaisiies @blackgirlmagicforever @a-frog-with-a-laptop @going-through-shit @asweetblueberry2

@roses-r-red54330 @mis-lil-red @sheblogs @hibye02 @impossibelle

@glitterypirateduck @zeroangelo13 @sekiro1310 @nelapeach14 @annamariereads16

@just-here-reading @celestialend @donttellthecats @scatteredstardustt @snoopyspace

@asterinblacksword @tsumudoll @georginat12 @skyjasper @anuttellaa

@willowpains @quinzzelx @amysangel @fightmedraco @puttyly

@lees-chaotic-brain @thisblogisaboutabook @esposadomd @stained-glass-eyes0708 @brujitafantomatico

@a-cup-of-nightshade @faridathefairy @bubybubsters @krowiathemythologynerd @joey-hoey

@acourtofdreamsandshadows @mendes-bae

#azriel shadowsinger #moonlightazriel #azriel #night court #azriel x reader #shadowsinger #sarahjmaas #azriel x y/n #velaris #acotar #azriel x oc #azriel acotar #worlds apart fic

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emiko-matsui · 5 hours

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i don't think any of you care, but i have blocked that person now and im gonna delete some posts from last night to clean up my own account from that shit. they doubled down on the fact that i'm a creep who's being weird about fat people, and when asked to produce the posts they're talking about that supposedly back them up they either stop replying or just repeat what they said in the previous message. im really grateful so many people have been nice to me about this and sent me messages, but i also wish we don't engage with this person anymore and stop sending them anons. for everyone's sake, but i also grabbed this from underneath one of their posts about the situation

when being asked to remember people online also are real people they completely disregard it, so i believe everyone is best to just move on from this. block them, because this lack of respect is insane and harmful to others in an online space.

lastly i also just wanted to say that i've had issues with my own body for a very long time (i won't say if it's regarding me being fat, skinny, disabled, etc. especially since that was one of the things that person got mad at me for not sharing) and that i, personally, am so grateful that all different body types exist because i think it makes humanity so much more beautiful. the fetishisation of fat people was something this person really hammered about, and i just wanna say that when it comes to your body it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks of it, when you have sex or are just naked you are beautiful and sexy, not because someone desires you or says so but because you feel it. i believe this to be true in every situation, but highlighted the naked part because that is what a lot of people struggle with and what i got jumped about by that blog. if any teenagers or younger people follow me and read a lot of my posts i want to remind you that the best feature on the internet is the block button. you don't have to justify yourself in your space, so if you don't like something just move past it. it's always okay to make things up about fictional character to make you feel better, as long as you're not mean to someone else what they think about the same character if they think differently. create your own space online, but also remember that the internet and what exists on it is available for anyone to see, so you can't go on making things up about real people. that goes just as much for someone trying to make up that i have a fat fetish as someone making up things about a mega celebrity like harry styles. it's far more unlikely to reach, but still affects a real person, and that is not okay.

I didn't mean for this to turn into a goddamn short story, so if anyones still reading i just wanna say thank you and remind you that kristen applebees is a chubby girl

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a-girl-in-neverland · 3 days

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Hii TSH fandom

I just finished the book (literally an hour ago) and i have many feelings and questions and a insatiable need to ramble, so buckle up if you want to

Maybe upon reading this post, you might think that some things are a bit dumb or that i could have worked out on my own. So let ME be the first to admit, that i AM a bit slow and that sometimes i become so invested in a story/book that i do not take a step back and analyse the characters, symbols, metaphors, reading in between the lines etc.

So without further ado:

Warning for The Secret History SPOILERS!!!!!

• Somewhere in the first half, its mentioned that Bunny takes medicine for asthma and that could be the reason for him putting in weight and being irritable, but Richard says that he later found that was for another reason. What was it? By the time this is mentioned i dont know if the farmer has already been killed or not

• What happened between Francis and Bunny? I read a theory that Francis may have tried something but i dont think that Bunny would still want to be friends after

• Why did Francis, Henry, Charles and Camilla put up with Bunny? He doesn't seem like a good friend, uses them for their money, doesn't seem interested that much in greek or classics (actually i got the feeling only henry and richard were more interested)

• In the beggining, Richard sees Henry and Julian talking. And Henry kisses him. And the stuff they were talking. What was that about? Was Henry just Julian's favorite or was something else there?

• In the second half, it has this whole drama and tension between Charles and Henry. I get why Charles is pissed. I don't get why Henry is tho. That scene which Camilla tells about this meeting with a lawyer, Henry is furious with Charles but I dont get his reasons. Was it just because Charles wasn't accepting his manipulation anymore?

• Kinda off topic but has anyone suggested Luther Ford as a fancast for Francis? He's the only one i could picture in my head

Kinda off topic part 2, i read the book in brazilian portuguese and the translation was... well, it could be better. Has anyone else thought so too?

Also, this is the second Donna Tartt book ive read (first was the goldfinch) and i still cant put into words how these books made me feel. The characters are insane but so compelling. The book is lengthy but every single part is important. I cant just say it was a good book, it doesn't feel right or does justice to how i felt

Anyway, if anyone has made it this far, thanks for the patience and for letting me ramble. Hope you have a great week and dont do cocaine in the burger king parking lot <3

#the secret history #richard papen #henry winter #bunny corcoran #charles macaulay #camilla macaulay #francis abernathy

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mytheoristavenue · 2 days

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MHA Fumikage Tokoyami x Reader - Dangerous - II

Summary: After losing your quirk, you confide in Tokoyami that your situation does, in fact, bother you.

Warnings: Heavy angst, little fluff, reader has a specific quirk, vindictiveness

"My lark..." Tokoyami stared in awe at the glow of you. The length of your hair burned a brightly, even smoldering towards your roots. "Your hair..."

"My...hair...?" you repeated, dazed from the small make-out session. "W-What's wrong with it?" As you lifted your fingertips up towards it, expecting to feel straw like dead ends, your skin was bathed in warmth.

Your eyes blew wide, your hands running through the firey strands, laughing wildly with tears beginning to stream, down your face. Your quirk had suddenly reawakened, you didn't even know that was possible. "I-I have to find a mirror," you finally blurted, hopping up and darting back inside, making a beeline for the nearest restroom.

Reluctant to enter the female bathroom, and still bewildered by this whole situation, Tokoymai followed you, glancing around nervously to make sure not a soul watched him enter. He found you there, hunched over a sink, staring at yourself with amazement. He couldn't help but smile to himself as he witnessed your love for yourself be reignited, literally, as he stepped closer, drawing an arm around you.

"I've never seen you burn so brightly," he commented serenely, smiling down at you as you did the same to your reflection.

"Neither have I..." you confessed, making his heart sink a bit. "I always knew my emotions had some sort of influence on my quirk, that's why the color changes but I never knew I could do this..." Something awful was beginning to brew in Tokoyami's stomach, and try as he might, it was beginning to feel hard to be happy for you. "It doesn't matter, though," you suddenly chirped, tearing your gaze away from the mirror and beaming up at him- an innocent look that made what he was about to say all that more heart-wrenching. "I have my quirk back and I don't have to leave anymore, my family doesn't have to go into witness protection, I-"

"I don't think you should tell anyone about your quirk reawakening." He confessed sternly, immediately wincing away when your smile faltered into a look of betrayal.

"....W-What...?" You words tumbled over your lips and fell to the floor like bloody spit after having a tooth knocked loose. That was what this felt like, a punch to the face. "Y-You...want me to go?"

"No, of course, I don't," he protested, albeit rather weakly. "B-But maybe it'd be for the best..." He had more to say, but you weren't interested in listening.

"I thought you said you liked me..." you reminded, angry tears welling in your eyes as your roots faded to a furious red. "I thought you were supposed to be my boyfriend now or something?!"

"I-I do, and I am!" he stuttered, shrinking at the way his voice cracked and echoed against the tile walls. "I-I just think..."

"What do you think?!" You shouted, tears freely flowing down your cheeks now. You didn't even care to let him answer as you stormed past him, checking his shoulder on the way out. "Actually, better yet, save your fucking breath."

"(Y/N), wait!" he called, scrambling after you as you made a beeline for the elevator. "Please, let's talk about this!" He called, thankful that the party was in the next room and not there to witness the spectacle.

"I am going to talk about it!" you argued, stepping into the elevation, standing in front of the doors to give him a chance to apologize. "With Nezu. Now are you going to back me up or not?"

He gazed at you longingly, his own ruby eyes becoming glossy too as he ever so faintly shook his head, making your heart drop. "We should talk about this more. Your quirk is unstable and you could be a danger to others...to yourself."

With that word, his bed was made. Reaching up to your scalp, you tore out a tuft of hair before rolling it around him your hands, watching it come to life. "I'm sorry," you looked at him, hurt written all over your face.

"No, no don't," he pleaded, shaking his head with shoulders slumped, already accepting what you had planned. He'd seen it before, any other time you wanted someone to leave you alone. With a tear slipping down your cheek, you tossed the ball in his direction and it disappeared into his shirt, its little white eyes reappearing on his chest before swiftly shifting to the back of it. "Seriously, (Y/N)? You can't just possess my shirt and drag me away!" He argued, more irritated than anything. After all, the little ghost hadn't hurt him, and probably wasn't even capable of doing harm- it was you that did it.

Regardless of his protests, the back of his shirt lifted into the air as if there were a bird inside it, trying to escape. "Damnit, (Y/N), stop!" he cried as you stepped backward, letting the elevator doors slowly shut on the view of him stumbling back onto the ground.

"I'm sorry, Tokoyami..." you whispered to yourself, shedding a final tear before drying it up, sniffling. "But I'm staying at UA, whether you want me hear or not. I'll become a hero with or without you."

-----

By the time Tokoyami got his wits about him, you were already long gone, the connection of possession being severed by distance. As the tugging on his shirt began to fade, he understood you were too far for him to catch you, but instinct betrayed rational thought as he stood and pushed through the elevator doors as it came back down. Maybe if just ran really fast, he could catch up to you in time to talk some sense into you or to convince Nezu that this was a bad idea.

His boot tapped rapidly against the elevator floor as it lifted him up, anxiety boiling inside him like a kettle. "Fumi?" a staticky voice chirped as his quirk materialized form his chest.

"Not now," he responded sternly, not in the mood for any of Dark Shadow's nonesense at the moment.

"Why'd you tell her that?" The shadow persisted, refusing to be caged just yet. "You think (N/N)'ll hurt people?"

"I don't know," Tokoyami sighed, stare pointed at the ceiling as if it would will him higher any faster. "But it's my responsibility to ensure she doesn't."

"Why?" The question had caught him off guard, making his eyes snap wide and towards his friend for a moment before his resolve strengthened further.

'Because that's what you do you..." He paused as if he was unsure if even revealing the secret to a part of himself would spell disaster. "When you love someone."

"Awe, Fumi" Dark Shadow teased, nudging his beak against Tokoyami's shoulder. "You're such a romantic!"

"That's enough," the crow snapped, feathers puffed as a warning. "Go away, don't make me say it twice."

"You're no fun..." the thing whined as his form began to dissolve against his host's sternum.

After what felt like ages, the doors finally opened, and Tokoyami wasted no time darting into the hall and down the hall toward the principal's office. Four voices made him halt in his tracks, two male and two female.

"And you're sure this isn't some sort of malfunction?" A deep, tired voice asked skeptically.

"Not from what I can tell," The voice of an elderly woman responded. "Do you feel any different, sweeite?"

"No," a younger, energetic voice replied. "I feel better than ever! I feel great."

The raven's heart sank as it dawned upon him- he was too late. Forcing his steps forward, feeling as if the soles of his boots were hollow and filled with gravel, he listened in on the rest of the meeting. Rounding the corner, he could see the office now, and he could see you sitting in a chair across from the principal, your teacher, and the school nurse on either side.

"Well, if she can defend herself at least, there's no sense in sending her home," said the mouse, stirring a cup of tea. "I do agree her parents should still be moved, her being home may endanger them more. I think UA is the best place for her as of now."

"I agree," Recovery said, carrying on as if you weren't there. "I would be more comfortable conducting more tests on her, make sure she's really alright."

"My students work much better as a unit than they do separately." Aizawa chimed in, yawning to punctuate his sentence. "Taking one away who can fight for herself may impact the class as a whole. After what they've been through, what they need most is morale, taking one from the bunch won't do anything but lower that."

"It's decided then!" Nezu chirped raising his cup toward you. "I'm pleased to say that you will continue your training here at UA!" Releif washed over you and you let out a small laugh.

"T-Thank you, sir! You won't regret this!" You beamed, happy tears streaming down your cheeks.

"That isn't all, though," the headmaster said, cutting your celebration short. "As I'm sure you just heard, I am still going to have your family put into witness protection and for their safety and yours, you will not be allowed to know their whereabouts." Your blood ran cold at his order, but, understanding it was for the best, you nodded. "Furthermore, you'll be put through even more rigorous training and you'll be spending extensive stays with Recovery Girl until we understand why this happened. Is that a deal?"

"Y-Yes," you accepted, standing and bowing to them all. "Thank you all so much, I won't let you down!"

With that, the meeting was adjourned, and you were granted permission to leave. Turning to exit the hallway, you found Tokoyami at the end of the hall, frozen. You stomped over to him on your wave to the elevator, pointing an accusing finger in his face.

"You little snake!" you hissed in a whisper so the staff wouldn't hear you as they left the office and rounded the opposite corner together.

The crow was taken aback at the insult. He'd been called many things, but never a snake. Regardless, he softly took hold of your wrist in an attempt to pull you into him. "Dove, listen-"

"You have some fucking nerve, you know that?" you snapped, sure that the teachers were out of earshot. "You kiss me, say all this poetic mushy shit, call me dangerous, try to stop me from staying in the academy, follow me to my meeting with Nezo to what- talk him out of letting me stay? And then, you just call me 'Dove' and try to hug me? Are you fucking joking, Tokoyami!?"

"I-I-" he stuttered, hands raised defensively. "N-no, I-"

You couldn't conceal the sobs in your throat and you began to crumble in front of him, just for a moment. "You make me feel so loved and so hated all at the same time, you're just-" You pause, wiping tears away on your sleeve. "Just evil!"

'Evil', that word echoed in his head like a bass drum, shattering his self-worth, and yet through it all, you were still his dove. "D-Dove, I-"

"And you know what is so God damn funny about it all?" you suddenly asked, weeping as tears stained your cheeks. "I've never hurt anyone." You reminded him. "You've almost killed the people you love multiple times..."

He was hardly listening anymore, knowing all too well what you were about to say, instead focussing on the way your stance faltered and you leaned against the wall for support, the way your roots took on a deep purplish blue- a sign of your depressive state, and the way your tears glistened in the moonlight of the window against flushed cheks.

"Yet I'm the dangerous one...?"

#mha #mha x reader #fumikage tokoyami x reader #tokoyami x reader #fumikage tokoyami #fumikage x reader #tokoyami angst #tokoyami x reader angst

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