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petrichor-idyllic · 11 months

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OPEN WOUNDS

Alright, alright, I just know people are gonna get mad at me but I'm having Maze Runner burn out, and the requests I have are throwing me through a loop right now lmao. (Requests are still closed.) So, I thought I'd write something different to get me out of my hole- my own idea. Yeah, I know, Petri writing their own original plot? Mad.

Hope I've got at least one OBX fan in my audience.

MASTERLIST | JJ MASTERLIST

SUMMARY: Fem! Reader x JJ Maybank. Enemies to lovers.

You and JJ have a tense relationship - you always have. But, both of you coming from rough home lives, you've both resorted to the Chateau and John B as your saviour. Neither of you talk about it, but you know more about JJ than you let on. Though, tonight is the night. With John B out with Sarah and JJ's dad out of town, you finally have the Chateau to yourself - until things don't go quite as planned.

WARNINGS: Inappropriate language, themes of physical abuse, generally depressing subject matter, no depiction of actual violence just the aftermath but still trigger warning for abuse. Also some friends references.

Ah.

The sweet relief of silence.

Between yours and JJ's bickering, the constant string of girls flooding through the Chateau, the parties, the drinking and John B's terrible music taste - the Chateau is normally a chaotic bundle of angsty teenagers. But not tonight.

Tonight, John B is on a date, Pope and Kie are at their respective homes, and JJ's father is out of town, resulting in him going home for his own peace. Probably, because he doesn't actually want to be stuck in the house with just you.

But that's fine by you.

You're not really sure why you and JJ hate each other so much. You swear blind that he started it, but he says otherwise. You were childhood friends with Pope, and JJ with John B - so when John B befriended Pope, you both just ended up tagging along. Now, you're a certified Pogue, and you're close with everyone, even Sarah.

Apart from JJ.

John B says you're just too similar to get along, Pope thinks it's because you're both too stubborn, Kie reckons it's because there's some underlying tension you both refuse to admit. But it doesn't really matter why, in your opinion.

And Kie is clearly wrong.

Though, when shit hit the fan at your place and you decided to seek refuge at the Chateau, you kinda sorta forgot that JJ was there for the same reasons.

You've tried, okay? You have tried to get along with him. To make things less awkward, if just for the sake of the other Pogues more than anything else.

But it just doesn't work.

JJ knows how to push your buttons, and no matter how calm and collected you try to be, most of your interactions end in an argument.

But not tonight.

Because he isn't here.

You lay, spawled on the couch, wearing a long worn band tee as a dress as you scroll through your phone, an episode of friends playing on the TV in the background. You think it's the one where Chandler gets handcuffed to a filing cabinet - but you're really not paying attention, nor do you remember the actual name of the episode. You mindlessly dive your hand into the bag of potato chips resting on your stomach, laughing at some TikTok Pope had sent you.

Between work, school, and arguing with a pretty surfer boy, you very rarely get time to actually just chill out and relax. You've not even bothered to get up and turn the lights on, the thin shine of the moonlight and the electronic flicker from the TV being the only things stopping you from walking into something when you eventually stand up.

Not that you intend on standing up anytime soon.

Things are going well. You might even be able to have a shower without JJ thinking he's hilarious and stealing your clothes. Or maybe even listen to music without him blasting his own music even louder.

Life is good, sometimes.

Just as you're smiling to yourself about how good your evening is, the door is violently yanked open and then slammed again, scaring the shit out of you.

"Jesus!" You jump, looking over the back of the sofa, it's too dark to make him out properly, but his trademark red cap and locks of blond escaping his choice of head wear give you a pretty good hint. "Maybank? The hell? Aren't you meant to be at home for once?"

You're too angry that he's interrupted your pleasant evening to realise that he's in clear distress.

"Fuck off, (Y/N)." He spits, leaving you in a state of shock. That's blunt and forward, even for him.

"What-?"

"Leave me alone." He says sharply, going into the spare room where he sleeps and slamming the door.

You sit there in a bubble of confusion for a couple of seconds before huffing and returning to your original position on the couch. "Whatever."

Your peace only lasts a few seconds as you hear a loud crash from inside the room. You sit up, silently, grabbing the remote and turning the TV off to see if you heard that correctly.

There's more crashing and banging as undoubtedly JJ has some kind of rage induced meltdown. That's when your phone buzzes. You open it, reading the message:

Pope

I thought Luke was out of town???

You

Huh???? He is??

Pope

I just saw him???

Went to the corner store and he was smoking outside

You

????

I thought JJ said he was gone for the week??

Pope

Is JJ at the Chateau??

I can't get ahold of him

You

Yeh

Burst in about five minutes ago

Pope

Can you check on him for me

You

Are you fr rn?

Pope:

Pls

You groan, tossing your phone to the side as you stand up. You stop in your tracks when you realise that the noises have stopped. The house is now completely and utterly silent.

Which is somehow more concerning.

"Oi, Maybank, you good?" You half-shout, earning no response as you pick up your phone from the sofa - just in case you have to call John B or Pope in a panic.

You get no respond, slowly walking towards the room. "JJ? Hey - you okay?" You knock on the door.

"Leave me alone." JJ's voice breaks as you hear his voice through the door, and you feel your stomach sink.

You don't particularly like JJ, sure, he's like, the hottest man you've ever seen, and he is genuinely kind of funny sometimes. That doesn't matter; you don't like him.

But you can empathise with him. And he's Pope's friend.

And it doesn't take a genuis to put the dots together about what's happened.

"JJ." You sigh. "I'm coming in."

To your surprise, he doesn't respond, so you slowly push the door open.

The room is a mess, clothes are scattered everywhere, a lamp's broken, the bed sheets are a mess and the pillow is across the room, slumped against a wall. It looks like he's thrown anything he managed to get his hands on. JJ sits on the floor, his knees pulled up to his chest, he stares at the floor, one hand in his messy blond locks, the other resting on his knee, red cap in his hand.

He doesn't look up as you walk in, his hair hiding his face along with the dimly lit room. Silently, you move, walking to sit next to him. You leave enough distance between you to make neither of you uncomfortable.

"I told you to leave me alone." He mumbles, not even looking at you.

You hesitate for a second, sighing.

"...my step dad was an asshole. When things got bad, I'd lose my shit and scream at anyone who got too close, screaming about how I wanted to be on my own. ...But, all I ever really wanted was for someone to push past all that and act like they cared about me."

JJ doesn't move, or even look up, so you keep talking.

"You can hate me, and tease me, and throw shit, and say you hate everyone and this whole shitty island and whatever you want to say to get it out your system - I get it. But I'm not going anywhere. I'm not leaving you, Maybank - so suck it up."

JJ is still silent, but his hand falls from his hair, loosely resting on his knee as he finally looks at you. You look at him out of the corner of your eye, and try not to visibly react.

JJ already has a black eye forming, a cut on his cheek and blood smeared under her nose. There's also blood staining the back of his hand, probably from wiping his nose.

"... you gonna put our petty differences aside for five minutes and let me fix that?" You ask; reacting dramatically or with pity is just going to piss him off even more.

JJ hesitates, but eventually nods, sighing. "Alright... but I don't wanna talk about it."

"I wasn't gonna ask." You stand up, offering him a hand, that he doesn't take, before he brushes past you and out the room.

That's about right.

He sits on the sofa as you get the appropriate means from the first aid box. You walk back to him, looking at him for a second before you step forward and touch his face for him to look up. He immediately flinches, pulling himself away, making you huff.

"Dude, I've gotta touch you if I'm gonna help you." JJ mumbles something you don't quite catch, but he lets you lift his face. You lightly dab under his nose, wiping the blood away before moving to the cut on his cheek.

He hisses as you press an alcohol wipe to his cheek.

"Sorry," you mumble.

"Could've warned me."

"Figured you wouldn't be such a pussy."

JJ simply rolls his eyes at this as you continue to nurse to him. Then you grab some glue strips, pressing down on one side of the cut and pulling the skin up to reach the other, tightly holding the cut together so it leaves less of a scar.

"Why are you helping me?" The question catches you off-guard, making you look him in the eye.

And you suddenly become very aware of how close you are. JJ isn't the goofy kid who always had a tooth missing and dirt on his clothes that you grew up with anymore. He's objectively gorgeous - there's a reason there's a seemingly endless amount of girls in the Chateau when he's around.

His bright ocean blue eyes lock with yours, and for a second, you understand. You understand all of those girls you judged and made fun of for falling for the blond's charm.

I mean look at him. How could they not?

And now is the worst moment to realise that.

You stand between his legs, bodies close, you're only wearing a thin lounge shirt and JJ's hands rest on his open legs, almost like he's fighting the instinct to put them on your waist.

You clear your throat, ripping your eyes away from his hypnotic gaze. He notices the shift, raising his eyebrow as you finally answer his question.

"I think I've already explained that."

He shrugs. "Yeah, I guess, but, like, you don't have to do this. Ain't you meant to hate me?"

"I only hate you because you hated me first."

"I didn't."

"Did too."

"Whatever." He pauses, eyes following your every move as you brush hair out of your face, grabbing his jaw.

"Stop moving."

"It hurts."

"Cope."

You place another gluestrip on his cheek. He opens his mouth to speak, but quickly shuts it again, making you curious. "What?"

"What, what?"

"You were gonna say something." You hook a finger under his chin, angling his face so you can see what you're doing better.

"No, I wasn't."

"Alright, fine - you weren't then."

The silence around you becomes more tense, and then JJ sighs. "I don't- I don't actually hate you."

You pause, looking at him, eyebrows furrowed.

"I mean, you're annoying as shit," he continues, "but... you're the only person that seems to be able to put up with my shit. So... yeah, yanno."

"So... you don't hate me?" You pull your hands away from his face, and he shakes his head, shrugging before running his fingers through his hair.

"No... you help around here - I mean, the Chateau would be trashed if you weren't around, and you help Pope out. And, I mean, he cares about you, for some reason, so you can't be all bad."

You scoff at this. "Yeah, yeah - you'll need some ice for that eye." He rolls his eyes in response as you return to the kitchen, bringing back a bag of frozen peas, which he presses to his eye as you finally sit down.

"It's cold."

"Is it really?"

"Ha ha." He fake laughs. "What were you even doing, anyway?"

"I watching TV and enjoying a peaceful evening."

"Sorry to ruin your evening." He says sarcastically.

"It ain't your fault." You respond, not quite sure where to go from here but you can't quite meet his eye either. It falls quiet again.

"...thank you."

He says it in such a whisper you think you're actually losing your mind at first. "What?"

"I, uh," he rubs his face. "I said thank you. You... you didn't have to do this. The others... When I- when..." He sighs. "Normally, they just leave me to it. They don't get it, they don't understand."

"They don't, not in the way you want them to, but they understand that you're going through something horrible. And they don't wanna make things worse. And you tell them to leave you alone and avoid talking about it - people can't help you if you don't let them, JJ." You say, your voice becoming softer as you finally look at him.

"You managed." He responds, watching you carefully. You don't really want to have this conversation either.

"Yeah, well, I'm stubborn." You joke, earning a snort and him dropping and shaking his head, his hands falling to his lap with the bag of peas.

"Yeah, you can say that again." He pauses. "Mind if I join you with your little marathon? I've got nothing better to do."

"What?" You scoff. "You want to willingly spend time together?"

"Yeah - fuck it, why not? It's been a shitty day, I'm not sure even your annoying-ass could make it worse."

"Ah, well, I'm sure I can find a way." JJ grins at your sarcastic comment, picking up the remote and flicking the TV back on. "Friends? Seriously?"

"What? It's good."

"Ehh, is it, though?"

"Just 'cause you have no taste."

"Rude. Well, what would you rather watch?"

"Uh, Two Guys and A Girl?" You blankly look at him. "You don't know what that is, do you?"

"No-"

"'Course you don't."

"Just 'cause you're a film freak." You sneer.

"Just 'cause you're uncultured." He retorts, then sighs. "It's another nineties sit-com. Only has two seasons."

"That probably means it's bad."

"Shut up. Ryan Reynolds is in it."

"That doesn't mean it's good."

"Uhh, yeah, it does."

You continue your dumb bickering, even though you do ultimately continue watching friends - JJ even laughs at some of the bad jokes. It's... weirdly nice.

You're not sure if it's just because you've become painfully aware that you're attracted to him, or if you guys are just trauma bonding, but it's almost fun.

"Ross is such a dick. Rachel deserves better." You chuckle at his comment, rolling your eyes. Then, after a moment, you speak.

"Oh, Maybank?"

"Yeah?" He responds between mouthfuls of potatoe chips.

"You don't need to thank me."

He pauses, glancing at you. "Yeah, I know - but I still will."

You nod, a small smile on your lips. "Well, you're welcome then."

○□○□○□○□○

"Guys! Guys!" John B rushes out the Chateau the next day as Kie and Pope carry booze and cups for plans of a kegger that evening. "You gotta see this."

"Huh? See what?" Kie blinks at the boy as she climbs out of her car, adjusting the bag she's holding full of paper cups. She'd lectured Pope for trying to buy plastic ones, which had condemned her to having to carry them.

"What are you talking about?" Pope raises an eyebrow.

"Shhh! Keep your voices down!" John B whisper-yells, making them exchange puzzled looks. "Come on. Come on!" He summons them to follow him, in which they shrug at each other as they follow him inside.

"Dude, what's going on?" Pope hisses, his tone low as John B leads them into the living room area.

John B puts a finger to his lips, then points at the couch. Kie and Pope exchange another glance before walking around the sofa.

"Holy-" Kie starts before John B dramatically shushes her again.

On the couch, you and JJ remain. You're not sure when you fell asleep, but you did.

You're both still sat up, your head resting on JJ's shoulder, his arm loosely around yours as his head rests on top of yours. You're almost snuggled into the crook of his neck, your knees pulled up and slighting resting on the edge of his lap.

"Should we wake them up?" Pope asks. "Psst! Guys-"

Kie slaps his arm. "Don't you dare. They're gonna get along even less when they wake up - let's just enjoy the peace whilst it lasts."

John B smirks and nods. "Yeah, come on, let's head to the Boneyard and start setting things up. They'll catch up later."

The trio walk out as quietly as they can, leaving you two to your slumber.

Kie's right; when you both wake up, you're going to be embarrassed and probably angry at the other. But right now, you're blissfully unaware.

The bag of frozen peas defrosts on the table, and even though JJ is clearly hurt, he's been taken care of, and seems content.

Yeah, so, I'm providing content no one asked for. This is my blog, let me live.

Lmao, in all seriousness, I figured writing the start of a potential crush could be cute for a change and it's nice writing for another one of my favourite boys, who isn't Minho.

I know this isn't my demography, but I'm tryna make my masterlist look less empty.

Anyway, I hope at least one of you enjoyed this :))

#🌿 petri obx jj maybank #🌿 petri writes #🌿 petri writes obx #🍃 petri obx #obx imagine #obx x reader #obx netflix #obx #obx fic #jj maybank outer banks #jj maybank obx #jj maybank #jj mayback x reader #jj x reader

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diazsdimples · 5 months

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Inspiration Saturday!!

I did a bad thing and started a new fic, which will be known as the Musician AU. Basically, Eddie, Hen & Chim are all players in the L.A Philharmonic, Bobby is the conductor, and Buck joins them for one concert as a new hot shot cello soloist. Eddie immediately falls head over heels for the man and him and Buck fuck nasty in many many backstage rooms. This is gonna be a long snippet sorry, I'm scared it's too niche lmao

Tagged by @callmenewbie @wildlife4life @loserdiaz @thewolvesof1998, thank you guys!

Eddie gets to his chair and takes a moment to fully appreciate that it’s his. He’s not played first horn for a while, let alone while being the principal, and he’s pretty hyped. He takes a moment to unpack his horn, slotting the slides carefully into place and pressing the valves up and down to make sure they don’t need any grease. He’s so focused on it that he doesn’t hear Hen sneaking up to his side, clarinet in hand, and almost jumps out of his skin when she speaks.

“So, have you seen our new soloist yet?” she asks, leaning casually against his music stand and Eddie lets out a startled yelp.

“Not yet” he responds once his heart rate has gone back to normal.

Hen picks at something in her teeth. “Apparently, he’s very good, Tracy and Jeff can’t stop talking about him. It’s getting on my nerves”.

“Makes sense that he’s good, you don’t solo with the L.A Phil if you’re shit” Eddie jokes and Hen sends him a flat look.

“You know what I mean” she responds dryly. “Was the youngest in his class at Juilliard and did a stint playing in New Zealand with the NZSO before moving back to New York and playing with the New York Phil”.

Eddie can’t help but be impressed; the New York Philharmonic isn’t easy to get into and from what he’s heard, the NZSO are no slouches either. “He must be alright then”.

“You talking about Wonder-Boy Buckley? More than alright from what I hear”. Chimney is slouching towards them, weaving his way through the chairs and music stands from where he usually sits as principal trumpet. “Cathy says he’s hot. You’d better not let him distract you, Eddie”.

Eddie rolls his eyes playfully at Chimney as he sets his music out on the stand. “I have excellent impulse control, thank you. Haven’t had a random hookup in almost a year, even though Joel’s been repeatedly trying to jump my bones”.

“He does that with everyone, don’t feel special” Chimney replies, and he pats Eddie on the back.

“Why do they call him Wonder-Boy Buckley by the way?” Eddie asks. “Buckley’s a weird name, isn’t it?”

“Buckley is his surname; his first name is Evan” Hen explains while Chimney blows into his trumpet to warm it up. “And he’s Wonder-Boy because he’s so young and hot”

Eddie scoffs at this. Wonder-Boy Buckley sounds like a bit of a prick, honestly.

“Ready for your big moment? First movement of the concerto has a pretty big horn solo, and Bobby is expecting big things from you”. Chimney is looking at him with big eyes and if Eddie didn’t know him better, he’d think the guy was actually concerned.

Eddie won’t lie, he is pretty nervous about it. The cello solo and the horn have a few moments in the piece where it’s just them playing and it’s damn high and fucking difficult. Eddie’s done it in concert before, but that was with a much more minor orchestra and not in front of an audience of 2000+ people. However, Chimney and Hen under no circumstances are allowed to know he’s nervous so he shrugs nonchalantly and says, “yeah, I’ve been practicing it loads and think I’ve got it all sorted. Unless the soloist is truly as hot as you say, I’m pretty sure nothing will throw me”.

It seems the gods are listening to Eddie and laughing at him, because at that very moment, an extremely attractive young man walks into the auditorium with a cello strapped to his back and all Eddie can think is fuck, he’s really fucking hot.

“Oh look, there he is” Chimney says, perking up and Hen’s eyes flit across the auditorium, coming to rest on the man and her jaw drops.

“Holy shit, he’s hot. And I like girls”

“How’s our resident dick-expert doing” Chimney nudges Eddie teasingly and Eddie’s currently making a conscious effort not to drool.

“Yeah he’s – uh – he’s not bad”.

Not bad? Eddie is convinced this is the hottest man he’s ever seen in his life. His muscles bulge as he swings the cello case off his back and sets it on the ground and he flicks his head up to talk to Bobby, his blond curls flouncing delightfully as he does so. Even from here, Eddie can see how his eyes are a piercing blue and he can’t help but notice the way they crinkle as he smiles at Bobby, flashing a set of perfect, white teeth. He’s got some sort of mark around his eyebrow, maybe a piercing? Eddie can’t quite tell from this distance but man, it’s got him feeling things he hasn’t felt in a long time.

Hen and Chimney are sharing a knowing look and Eddie firmly ignores them, instead picking up his horn and beginning to blow some warm air into it. Terry, Amy, Sophie and Grant, his fellow horn players, have all turned up and are setting up, striking up idle conversation with one another as they wait for Bobby to give the order to tune up and start practicing. Hen pats Eddie on the back before returning to her chair and Chimney wiggles his eyebrows as he retreats, flicking his tongue around his mouthpiece suggestively.

(No pressure) tagging @theotherbuckley @eddiebabygirldiaz @wikiangela @fionaswhvre @smilingbuckley @fortheloveofbuddie @fruitandbubbles @watchyourbuck @incorrect9-1-1 @knightlywonders @housewifebuck @monsterrae1 @evanbegins @cal-daisies-and-briars @thosetwofirefighters @disasterbuckdiaz @spagheddiediaz @malewifediaz @shitouttabuck @jeeyuns

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vtforpedro · 4 months

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long life update - TWs in tags

It feels like it's been ages. I'm so exhausted and in a lot of physical pain. Going on two months of it being the worst it's been right after a couple of months of the best it's been. Chronic pain + grief + trying to get help from doctors who should have their licenses revoked + dealing with a shit relationship with my mom + a good, decades-long friendship ending + the ongoing disability process with the SSA + LAW FIRMS.

I'm so fucking tired. I don't remember if I updated that the appeals council decided not to review my case because the 'judge followed the law' except that he didn't. So, as it turns out, my original attorney (and he did not tell me this) before he left, wrote that if they denied me, it should go to federal district court.

I'm now working with a NY law firm to take my case to federal court because my current law firm believes it has merit, and I guess they do, too. That's how fucked the decision was, and I'm glad my initial reaction of bewilderment and anger was spot on lol

The good news is, it should only take another year! ._.

My neurologist is the worst doctor I have ever come across and I'm quite literally stuck with him with nowhere else to go. I wish him upon no one. I'm so tired of calling the SSA, getting documents to them, signing things for law firms, contacting law firms, getting no responses, and contacting them all over and over again. I am in incredible physical pain, like this actively makes my neuro stuff worse. Everything makes it worse. I have autonomic testing in a few days, and idk if I'll get through it b/c I have to stop the meds that keep me out of the ER two days prior, and it scares me.

My relationship with my mom is fractured and I don't feel like family therapy is actually helping. I had to end a friendship with someone I love and care very much about but who was growing too comfortable mistreating me and I was giving them too many passes 😞 I've known them for the better part of two decades.

It's been over seven months since my cat Isis died. I don't know how. It feels like she was here just yesterday. Yet, all the nights I've sat and talked to her and wept are all too real. I miss her more than I can say. She was my soul cat. I keep thinking about tomorrow and how she'd be so nosy getting into EVERYthing when gifts are opened at Christmas. Having to stop her, move her, laugh because she was just so n o s y and it was hilarious. And she's not gonna be here for that ever again.

I'm having a really fucking hard time tonight. It's just hitting me how god-awful this year has been and how I have a bad week to look forward to before even getting to the new year lmao I have to stop taking so many of my medications 48hrs before 1.5-2hrs of testing to see if we can find out Yet Another Thing Wrong With Me but knowing my luck it'll be 'no findings' and the mystery of why my core body temp plummets to 93.9 in the blink of an eye won't be solved until I have suffered juuuuust enough.

It never ends. Never. I want to give up. I'm so tired of doing this. I don't want to anymore. It never. fucking. ends.

I absolutely cannot say it's all been bad, though. I've met incredible, warm, welcoming, giving, kind people this year. Y'all have helped me more than you know and I'm so so so lucky to be able to call you my friends. This year has sucked for so many of us, but I want to say I'm proud of you, and I love you all very much.

My fic is gonna be printed in a hardcover zine early next year. I participated in a Big Bang for the first time and that'll also go out early next year. I'm hosting a tiny event in my tiny fandom server that I'm super excited about. I have a raffle prize to write (bagginshield !!!! SO EXCITED to revisit the og otp) and a Valentine's gift to write for another fandom.

I posted 401,000 words this year and wrote many more unfinished wips, plus a long one (90k) that I am very invested in finishing.

I painted and drew so much this year. I improved a lot, too! I got a couple of portraits printed from inprnt to see how they looked, and it was MY art, and they were GORGEOUS. I thought I would hate seeing my art professionally printed, but no! I almost cried. They looked so lovely.

My cat Lilly had health issues almost immediately following Isis's passing, but she is doing so well right now. She's blossomed into another cat, and while she's not my constant companion, she is with me so much more than she used to be. When she walks onto my desk I am to stop everything and hold her like baby in my arms until she decides that's enough (or I really need to move) lmaaao she's such a goober. My heart cat. <3

I'm not doing well right now--my MH is bad. Especially tonight. But it felt good to write the good things.

I'm sorry for my lack of replies and kinda disappearing. I'm running on fumes. I hope next year will bring physical relief so emotional relief can happen.

For those of you facing difficulties of any kind, I am holding your hand in spirit.

#vtforpedro personal #vtforpedro medical #tw mental illness #tw medical #tw depressing stuff #tw pet loss #I always wish I have something better to write #gonna try to do everything in my power to make that happen next year

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cosmictulips · 2 years

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sorry this has nothing to do with the game it's just something I keep noticing and I keep saying but omg it keeps popping up

first of all thank you to everyone for their patience with the game asks lmao I wanted to finish them all today but that's not gonna happen. Luckily! there aren't many! so. I'll just do them with a sprinkle sprackle.

Anyway --

Tarot is not your end all be all. please seek out advice from people you love. trust yourselves more babes. I can't tell you how much I've been feeling like a spinning top lately and all I get is "well I am changing taryn!" and "i can only change so much taryn!" have you tried... idk... being kind to yourself and stepping away from the situation and enjoying what you actually have? instead of trying to change the situation, try seeing it in a different light first. you'll realize that 99 percent of the problem is literally, how you're seeing it.

2. YOU ARE NOT DESTINED FOR A BAD FUCKING LIFE IF YOU ARE UNAWARE OF YOUR FLAWS. I mean, karma might bite you in the ass a couple of times but like, do you live in reality? LOL. BAD PEOPLE GET GOOD SHIT ALL THE TIME. stop trying to scare folks into being "good" and "kind" . you live on a spectrum. be impulsive. get stubborn. FUCK. it's not going to hurt you if you actually show your anger.

3. pacs are fun but don't take them seriously.

4. I'm tired of people being like "uwu stop reading pacs because the energy of the tarot reading and you asking the same question over and over is interfering when you're going to meeting this person or get this thing etc etc" I know I've said this before. but I'm changing that stance because I find it to be a load of bull. read all the pacs you want. get excited for your future. gods just be happy and find enjoyment with something.

5. reblog and interact with your favorite blogs but please for the love of the gods stop gaslighting us. stop guilt tripping us. stop being weird and creepy and stop thinking that you're any of these things. read the rules, follow the games. look at the tags and the reblogs to keep up to date on things. 99 percent of you are not creepy, or strange or weird. you're not a bot you're a human. at most you can be is annoying. so just say hi to us and ask questions. we won't bite you.

... I don't know if that last one makes sense I'm just blabbing.

but yea.

Captain Tulips OUT!

#it's a rant #but it needs to be said #astrology #tarot

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megarywrites · 6 months

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10 songs tag

tagged by @thewriteflame and ofc i'll be doing this for Seafoam, specifically from my Thala playlist

the rules are: Use your WIP playlist and put it on shuffle. Write the first 10 songs that come up and quote your favorite lyrics from each song and/or the lyrics that fit your WIP best (they might be the same lyrics), then tag 10 people.

I'll tag (as always, no pressure): @aninkwellofnectar @isherwoodj @flowerprose @pinespittinink @the-orangeauthor @ashen-crest @ellatholmes @wildswrites @at-thezenith @mariahwritesstuff

No Rest For the Wicked - LVCRFT

Ain't no rest for the wicked Ain't no running from your fate Ain't no one left to listen when the world's up in flames

Let's just say it's very fitting for an upcoming chapter lol

Alive - SHINee

In this new world before me I'll follow the faith that I lost No one can stop me

ofc SHINee shows up lmao this song is all in Korean but i love the actual vibe of this song like musically it fits the mood from here on out in the story

Hurts Like Hell - Fleurie & Tommee Profitt

When it's almost too much for my soul alone I loved, and I loved and I lost you (x3) And it hurts like hell

this one in particular was added to the playlist for the part i'm currently writing (i am suffering thanks for asking)

Shake It Out - Florence + the Machine

And I'm ready to suffer and I'm ready to hope It's a shot in the dark and right at my throat 'Cause looking for heaven found a devil in me

the above lyrics are my favorite, and it's very fitting for how Thala is about to be in the story, since I'm nearing the climax

BIBI Vengeance (Bad Bitch) - BIBI

it doesn’t matter what you did what you say what you regret I forgave you for breaking me down and treading on me too bad you lost your last chance I’ve been waiting and anticipating, to be a bad bitch

I was trying to keep all the lyrics at three but i just can't not post this whole segment lol it's just so perfect (also another Korean song)

Little Girl Gone - CHINCHILLA

I like your blood on my teeth just a little too much So bite me, slap me round the face Now I'm twisting your arm till I hear it break

this song has been living in my head rent free since I first heard it lol we love an angry girl anthem

Fight Song - Rachel Platten

Like a small boat on the ocean Sending big waves into motion Like how a single word can make a heart open I might only have one match But I can make an explosion

this one represents a part in the story that's already written, which i'm sure you can guess given the title, but it's when she was finding her will to fight again after losing it for a while (this song made me cry while I was driving when i was writing that part lol)

Bad Reputation - Joan Jett

A girl can do what she wants to do and that's what I'm gonna do And I don't give a damn 'bout my bad reputation Oh no, not me

words to live by tbh

Look What You Made Me Do - Taylor Swift

But I got smarter, I got harder in the nick of time Honey, I rose up from the dead, I do it all the time I've got a list of names and yours in in red underlined

I feel like this is self-explanatory lol "yours" is referring to multiple people ofc

Last Laugh - FLETCHER

I'm crashin' your party to teach you a lesson Heard you get nervous whenever I'm mentioned So if you're scared, then go find you a priest Go find a confession

this one is from the soundtrack of "Promising Young Woman" and as soon as it came up in the credits I added it to this playlist lmao

#tag game #aes: seafoam #okay time to eat and then try to finish this chapter

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gaypleasantview · 1 year

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The Goth Family

+ some blabber under cut that i'd normally put in tags but not today <3

this is a small photoshoot location i randomly created on spot just to take this photo, i wanted the goths to have a picture together but i have genuinely never been good at buy mode so i believe this is my first try at making a proper room and i just loveee this place so much <3 too bad it's a random square box i built next to the actual goth house lmao but i definitely want it in the estate so i'll have to move all the stuff eventually (and figure out where it would fit since i have the ts1 goth house and it's tiny and needs a lot of add-ons, it's gonna be fun but it feels intimidating). and cassie's dress is so uneccesarily big but i love it so muchhh, she looks like a princess that's my baby <3 (she's older than me) i have to mention there's also a feral michael bachelor in the house and i almost k worded him bc he kept interrupting the photoshoot wearing a tshirt with shorts like he's your embarrassing uncle that you're stuck with on a beach vacation, anyway i made him light the fireplace a few times and was seriously scared the place was gonna set on fire like the last two times i had a photoshoot also everyone was obsessed with the piano and thinking about it all the time when i had the bubbles on and once i accidentally moved michael into a window, i hate love playing with the goths bc in every game they're the same and keep wreaking havoc and fighting each other and ruining their relationships, it was always that way when i was playing out their story in ts1 bc i had a hacked poster that worked like maxmotives but it also made all the other stats go up as well including their personality points (idk who needs that) and because of that everyone was 10-points extraverted and wouldn't stop talking to each other and eventually they all hated each other, also mortimer with that stupid mouse doll was everywhere pls tell me you all know what i mean 😭 i really should share something about that story one day yeah...

okayyyy also idk what to do with this photo now that i think about it bc the timeline is all over the place, bella hasn't been in the picture for like 2 years and cassie's scar is fresh and alex was definitely younger when their mom disappeared, he's supposed to be 13 now even though he looks 15 here but his age was decided on actually about 13 literal years ago so i don't know if i can part with that 😭 i like him being a weird ultra smart child pain in the ass lol. i actually had a legacy challenge in ts1 ten years ago where spoiler alert alex was the actual child of my founder bc she adopted him, he had a different name and all and he was super mega sweet, i feel like he's way more bitchy here for some reason 😭 i just love when everyone is a bitch i guess...

okay i'm so happy thank you i just need to make some portraits for the game now that will actually be representative of how everyone looked at some points in their lives okay bye. i think i'm actually gonna do it and not just dream of doing it and i love this inspiration wave i've been having, big thanks to my moots <3

#the sims 2 #goth family #project: cr #ts2 premades

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abla-soso · 2 years

Note

The Jedi don’t kidnap children, they ask parents if they want to give up their child to the Jedi or not and a lot of them do for a better life. The Jedi tried stopping slavery in the outer rim, and the canon novel dooku Jedi lost has Dooku going to the senate to stop slavery and the senates just like “Nah Bruh we good” like WHAT, the Jedi also only had 10,000 Jedi so not all of them could end slavery without resulting in a civil war that would have darth Plagueis or darth sidious come into power

Years before I joined the Star Wars fandom; I always heard how insanely toxic and batshit insane it was. But I didn't care much because I thought I was used to being in crazy, toxic fandoms. But man... I was wrong. So wrong.

You people are scary. You really genuinely scare me.

Only brainwashed cultists and government bootlickers are this shameless in excusing= profiting from slavery, religious abuse, institutional abuse, child abuse, and war crimes.

This is why I no longer have conversations with Jedi apoligists (I only directly respond to them when it feels needed and then I immediately block their asses).

Jedi apologia just makes my blood run cold.

As for your very typical and very gross Jedi apologia, anon, I'm not gonna bother repeating every single rebuttal I've written and reblogged concerning the lies - yes, lies - you mentioned. My "Jedi critical" tag is right here.

But I will talk about the funniest lie you mentioned: that the Jedi seriously tried to stop slavery... and you mentioned Dooku as evidence...

Wanna know what Dooku actually said about Jedi and slavery? After they didn't bother to do anything serious about slavery until the Clone Wars forced them to for purely strategic reasons?

Lmao???

#this fandom is fucking insane #anti jedi apologia #jedi critical #star wars

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stickers-on-a-laptop · 2 years

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Tag people you'd like to know better

Tagged by @ginkashino!! Thanks for the tag!!

Favorite color: I'm basic and blue. All the blues. Although I don't wear a lot of it lmao.

Currently reading: I just finished Vol 6 of Zom100 a few minutes ago, which means I have to go find something new to read or reread. I might try the ten billion Pierce Anthony books we have, cause my dad and sister love them, but I don't remember being impressed. But I do need to find something to read.

Last song: Blinding Lights by the Weeknd. Spotify has been REAL shitty with the ads lately so I was just going through Youtube sidebar. Did you know that Sam Glee is in the Tonight Tonight music video? I know it's cause he's a brother of one of the guys but I had never watched the music video for it despite it being a song that was on when I was like in middle school.

Last series: That I finished? KinnPorsche. Lots of thoughts that I will not share. Currently watching Zyuohger, which I am calling "Minecraft Furries Sentai" because I cannot SPELL and a few other series here and there. But the main one is Zyuohger.

Last movie: I think it was Death Game Park? ShinkenRed being homoerotic (murder vibes) with Decade. It honestly wasn't very good but like. Tokus.

Sweet/savory/spicy: Love a good sweet thing. Love a good savory thing. Would like to be ABLE to say I love a good spicy thing but unfortunately my Mexican genes did NOT come through for me and I can barely handle like mild salsa. Doesn't stop me from eating Takis tho.

Currently working on: Several WIPS, mostly toku ones, and absolutely nothing in life lmao. My sister is gonna move out and I need to get a job and like. I know I need to. But also. See reality? It sucks and I'd really rather not.

Also I need to get some shirts ready in case I actually do get to see Ozawa Ryota. I have no idea if it will be going through if it's a month away and world is INSANE. But I did buy tickets. So.... there's that to work on.

Tagging: there are so many people I'm like "wow they're following me and they are cooler than me" that I am scared to bug lmao so if you follow me, I probably think you're cooler than me and you can consider yourself tagged!

#tag games #also a drama i finished recently was an intersex one that also has decade in it that was really good #it also had zamigo lmao #found it by accident and was like INTERSEX DRAMA?????

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infisonicosm · 2 years

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hi hi! ໒꒰ྀིྀི ੭ ˃̵ᴗ˂̵ ꒱ྀི੭♡

……so, i just followed you (u follow me back on ur other acc!) & ive been recently writing fics / oneshots about sam (haven’t posted any yet, but i will once they’re finished) & i was just wondering what made you stop writing for the guys?

i keep hearing ‘bout how this particular fandom is ruthless ?? (i just rejoined tumblr so idk if it’s just a tumblr thing, sorry) but yeah.. any advice on the matter? ……it’s lowkey making me terrified to post my writing, but on the other hand, im so in love with the fics i’ve written recently and really wanna post them.

also..! im so sorry that this fandom has been so harsh & downright cruel to you & your writing. you don’t deserve none of it. you’re very loved & appreciated. i promise. the haters can absolutely fuck off.

love, noa. ♡ xoxo.

Hi Noa!<3 Sorry this took me literally all day to respond to, I wanted to be sat at my computer to reply to this.

I haven't really decided if I'm done writing for the boys. I'm in limbo about it tbh.

Tumblr is actually the tamer side of the fandom. We don't have many altercations and try to avoid those we don't like unless we can't. My advice? Don't be shy to block people or unfollow them. Your experience on here will be so much easier if you follow those who you truly enjoy content from.

As for posting your writing, I will always encourage others to go for it. Just because others have shitty experiences doesn't mean you will. I'm just personally fed up with the fanfic author thing being thrown in my face in any argument. I highly advise that you make sure it's tagged with the right warnings bc this fandom has some notorious keyboard warriors who will jump your shit so fast if you miss something. Also, cheesy romance that's only found in movies? Not acceptable in this fandom. Everything has to be biblically, factually, and historically accurate for these fools LMAO. Personally for me, none of that matters and I understand the meaning of FICTION. There's lots of people who understand that as well.

It just eats away at you after a while and after almost a year of writing in this fandom I'm just fed up, as are a lot of other writers in this community.

If you post your writing, I will happily read it. I'm not picky and I love reblogging other content creators to share their work. I hope my experience doesn't scare others away but is seen more as a warning to what you can possibly deal with as a writer in the GVF fandom.

Thank you for such a kind message btw<3 I never know what I'm gonna get most days in my inbox and something positive is always refreshing!

#my asks #greta van fleet fan fiction #greta van fic #greta van fleet #gvf

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edotfightme · 2 months

Text

The Harder Path That Could Have Been Walked

So I'm doing a live reaction to my own 10,000 word fic that I forgot I wrote. Link here. You'll probably have to read the fic to understand my reactions because I am not keying them to each part.

A lot of this is me complaining about my own writing.

Let's go!

-----<>-----

What the fuck are these tags? WHAT DO YOU MEAN KIND OF???

Why did I tag sad racoons?

Wtf do you mean "don't summon void dragons" why is that in the tags???

I finally got past the tags.

This is a lot of worldbuilding in the notes let me check how much. 540 words of worldbuilding in the tags alone.

Wtf where did I find that language what does it say?

I can't understand a single word that was said before it translated to English it doesn't really work for an effect like I clearly intended. Plus the paragraphing makes it hard to read.

Bruh the first part was badly written we're starting off strong.

Oh shit, I started recognizing the second part. Ish. Holy shit it's like a core memory was unlocked. I remember thinking this was super cool. Let adult (questionable) me be the judge of that.

Hang on I think I realized why the hook was so shit. I was trying to keep his identity hidden. Still sucked though but good on you younger me. Still too many paragraphing issues. This was before I sorted those out methinks.

Holy shit Technoblade was still alive when I wrote this. Just had a moment while I thought of it.

Eww more text I can't read. Gonna scroll to the bottom to see if I translated it. MF I DIDN'T TRANSLATE FOR EVERYONE???? Where is the fic on my computer I need to figure out the translation- I'll finish this first hold on.

Lmao Tommy got put in his place. Should've put some sort of descriptor on the text so people knew how the Piglin was talking and which ones were talking. It's too intuitive.

"What are they saying?" I wanna know that as well Techno.

I just looked for the document and couldn't find it. The meanings will be lost to time.

Oh shit I forgot about the racoons. I gave Tommy a ton of racoons. That must be the sad racoons I mentioned. Wtf am I going to do with a bunch of racoons???

I wish I didn't press 'enter' so much jfc. Learn to write a paragraph little me. Number 1 thing I'll tell myself if I ever time travel is to write a god damn paragraph. This is exhausting to read.

Ewww I forgot about "pog".

Lol he scared the shit outta everyone you go kiddo!

The references to the bits are actually pretty funny though. I just wish I could understand WHATEVER THE FUCK THE PIGLINS ARE SAYING!!!

Also the lack of racism in this book infuriates me. Don't get me wrong, I don't condone racism, but could they be just a tad bit more racist to properly set up that they are the bad guys. The cult stuff isn't enough. We need to really hate these guys. TREAT THEM LIKE SHIT!

Lmao Tommy just had a moment where he's just fucking experiencing a past life. Which is mood. Like when you're walking in a crowd and you lock eyes with a familiar stranger and you stop for a moment to stare, wondering who they could've been to you. But then the moment shatters and you're left standing with the broken remains of what could never be.

The pacing and plot convenience is shit though (where is the racism? The foreign and silent curiosity of who you are?) let me just continue the fic.

I WANT TO FUCKING READ THIS FIC NOT A TON OF GLYPHS! The whole fic will be like this god dammit. I didn't realize this was my era before I learnt how to write foreign languages.

Haha. The random moment where it's just gibberish and then "fuck".

For those of you who aren't reading alongside me, here's piglin dialouge for reference:

"ᛟᚺ! ᚺᛁ! ᛁᛟᚢ ᛊᛈᛖᚨᚲ ᛈᛁᚷᛚᛁᛊᚺ?! ᛏᚺᚨᛏ×ᛊ ᚷᚱᛖᚨᛏ! ᛗᛁ ᚾᚨᛗᛖ ᛁᛊ ᛉᛖᛈᚺᛁᚱᚢᛊ!"

wtf does that even say???

"... that good old pogtopia look in his eyes" what was younger me smoking???? I can picture the exact expression but jesus christ kid are you alright?

Why the fuck can Phil speak english? Are they all speaking a different language? What is happening right now?

"The door to their cell swung open and Mr "Goes missing and freaks everyone the fuck out but is fine since he joined a cult" runs in." Holy shit little me you fucking killed him.

"Don't worry mate you won't be sacrificed." What kind of reassurance is that? I know it's like that on purpose but it's terrible. The unknown is scarier than the known. That's what I was banking on with Sinners.

"Eventually, Wilbur stopped looking like he was 5 minutes away from war crimes and now looked like he was 2 seconds away from war crimes for a different reason." I'm sorry but these quotes are something else. Where is the comma? You could've made this a beautiful paragraph but it's just a sentence. DESCRIBE THE ANGUISH!

Which corner is Wilbur staring at? Shouldn't he just like... glare at Phil with murder in his eyes? Also why is Tommy the attack dog? I get that Wilbur is roleplaying a drama club goth but shouldn't Techno logically be the protective one here? Or them all trying to shuffle each other behind themselves like some weird fight. And Phil's just standing there confused and vaguely exasperated, like it's someone else's emotions.

Don't make me rewrite this fic I don't want to touch it again.

Lmao them being so distracted by roleplaying drama kid goths and they forget to escape. Most realistic thing I've seen so far.

WAIT THIS IS ME PRE-PANIC ATTACKS THAT EXPLAINS SO MUCH.

Plaininnit lol that's actually a good one. Also why are they answering? Make him fight for the info you muppets! But the mental disorders though.

What was the point of that entire prison scene? It looks like it served no purpose. It didn't move the plot forward at all! It just served to show us that Phil can also speak normal? Like- we could've had that later?

At last, a piece of dialogue I think I understand! The X must be an apostrophe then.

Why is Wilbur speaking in percentages? I should've had Techno's chat run a poll and the odds not looking too good.

Why is Phil in the cult council? Did I explain that? Idk if it was in the worldbuilding or later...

Why'd Tommy also shout in another language? What is with younger me and making reading difficult? I can tell why this one was so poorly recieved, nobody wants to translate a book to read it.

Eww I used "snapped" twice in the same sentence.

Why is Tommy suddenly mute now? I know I had a reason, I just can't remember it.

Hang on I gotta scroll up and read some world-building rq.

Wait fuck what is the techno quote??? oh right- "WELCOME HOME THESEUS!" Just got to the part where Tommy mimes his name across.

*to the music of where is the justice* "Where is the pacing?"

Why the music memory thing? I know what I'm meaning for the audience to ask themselves but why did I do that? I should've introduced that later on. It would've made a better plot.

Lmao the warped fungus bit was funny though.

Bruh I nailed the creepy elder thing on the head. I don't know why I'm just good at writing sleazeballs taking advantage of kids (not sexually, just in a way that grates uncomfortably against the reader). I don't know where that comes from.

WAIT I THINK I MIGHT'VE REMEMBERED A PLOT POINT! Are all of Wilbur's snakes lavaproof? Is that why I had the scene?

Oh that is disgusting what is wrong with you little me? I should've tagged cannibalism. It feels like cannibalism.

The pandora's vault Dream being grounded bit is funny and I live for it. Little me had ideas. Offputting ideas but ideas.

Lol Elder took the jukebox.

This is so uncomfortable to read but not in the way an Elder scene is. Just Phil thinking that Tommy's eyes being red means he's happy but it's fake. And Phil hating it when Tommy's eyes are blue is just tragic. Because it comes across as Phil hating it when Tommy is himself and then he's happy when Tommy wakes up brainwashed but Tommy came to him for comfort because he was fucked I just- Little me you are one messed up kid.

HAHA He named Cat "Dream" because it envokes bad memories.

Oh wait that's what the beneath the surface intention was. The surface reference was that the colours reminded him of the people.

Phil dropped Ancient Debris on his foot. Wouldn't it be fucked up if Mojang added a weight limit in Minecraft?

KRISTEN!!!!

The typos in her description though... I want to cry.

OMG KRISTEN IS HIS THING! That's actually adorable though. Little me knows how to make me aww.

More Techno vs the Warped Fungus bit I am living for it.

What is with the blue and red strobe lights that are Tommy's eyes? What is wrong with him? Little me? Explain?

Wait why is everyone just vibin in the castle? What's with that? Also Phil being a moron for Kristen and she's just being a little shit. Dream joined a nether fortress as well lmao.

Oh that's what the warped fungus bit joke was for. So he could still be lava-proof.

BRUH WHY DID I WRITE THAT??? I SPOILED THE PLOT TWIST!

Wait why are we singing ten duel commandments? Did I organize the ending to that song? that sucks.

OH MY GOD I WROTE A CHILD GROOMER??? Holy shit that is foul. I was a child when I wrote this. What the fuck? No wonder why I was getting the heebie jeebies. I literally wrote the Elder as a character that is grooming Theseus.

The wills part was so out of place idk.

Double use of worried kill me now.

Oh damn the Phil and Kristen scene hit. That one definetly didn't feel out of place.

OH SHIT I didn't expect Phil to pull Tommy out of his ass. The jail scene looks important now.

They found him. Chat. It's only a matter of time.

Aww trauma babies. Them all being so traumatized that they're fully on alert and watching for fireworks.

LMAO SHIT HITS THE FAN AND PHIL DIPS WHAT A CHAMP.

Also the fact that I'm pretty sure the Elder was placing Tommy into a drugged trance and basically hypnotising him is fucked up. Younger me you are messed up.

Kristen's entrance was pretty darn good. Like the crows being death and just everyone and everything knowing who exactly is gracing their halls is terrifying and excellent.

Philza for the save finally! Let's go!

Lmao Techno's mates at the Bastion being right bastards and telling the gossip I am living for it.

OH shit, the author notes at the end. The entire flock was there. Damn, Elder was not escaping with his life after grooming one of his kids.

-----<>-----

And that's it! I hope you enjoyed my commentary on my 10,000-word book. I actually found it enjoyable to rediscover my own book. I can understand how other people got put off by it but after slogging through the dialogue I couldn't fucking read it was a decent story. A few issues but overall a fun experience.

#writing #fiction #ao3 #dream smp #technoblade #tommyinnit #wilbur soot #philza #dream smp fanfiction #blind reaction #blind reacting to my own fic #i regret everything #i regret nothing

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elaichoi · 10 months

Note

the v v v first time i saw ur acct was when u had the yeonjun prive alliance layout ^3^ those reincarnation aus made me saur emo T^T

i luv that for u agghh<3 not that there's anything wrong w it,but i find it most satisfying when ppl get into kpop from kpop-genre songs rather than western-sounding kpop songs lol my first kpop artists were b2st (highlight) and t-ara hehe

mhm yea mayybbe! i know 100% why i don't post them and its cos i used to be consistent w posting on both kpop & personal socmed accts but mental health happens and i kinda stopped bc numbers make me want 2 cry lmfao

except im slightly less mentally ill since that time now and yk i actually genuinely do rlly want to start all my socmed accts up again but im putting it off bc im a bit of a perfectionist and so im lazy to be doing all dat... all of nothin :D don't call the orderly i'm fine ^_^ /lh

2019-21? ah probably not then i'm pretty sure i was in and out of the school roster (pls tell me if i am oversharing/trauma dumping/crossing any boundaries bc i genuinely do not know i no longer have any social skills T_T /gen /srs)

hm i'm not sure tbh i only followed the one 😭😭 i haven't been on wattpad in a long ass time and i remember i tried seeing what wattpad was like nowadays and was v disappointed w the ads and paid stuff (i think i don't remember). booooo 👎👎

omg wait that's so cool aaaaah!!! i changed my user a lot so i honestly could not tell u bc i have goldfish memory ;__; i do remember i had a user like taempons(_) i think it had an underscore idk don't remember but i changed it (kinda wish i saved it ngl) and oh one i do remember was peachyjihoons (my wannaone phase lmao) but yeah im pretty sure my most recent user was some based on some tumblr shit like svnshine or something idfk 💀💀

u are already a talented writer save some for the rest of us 👺 /j if u could also draw u would be too powerful 👁️👄👁️

omg THAT WAS MY FIRST LAYOUT TOO!! this account isn't that old tbh i still haven't gotten the feel of writing smuts as of yet that's why i havent been much active on it BUT WAIT REINCARNATION AU?!? from my main???

DUDE I LOVE B2ST!!!! and t-ara!!!!!!!! i really got into kpop slowly because i fell for kdrama at first (found replay in one of the kdrama edit lmao) so like my music journey has been very, very kpop ish. i think the global influence in most of kpop songs started to become mroe prominent during 2018?

bro i get you like the fear of starting the stuff you love because you feel like you won't be able to give it all and starting it and feeling it like you're gonna disappoint yourself. i hadn't started anything since like 2017 until recently because i was scared i was gonna stumble, or it won't be good ( well mostly that) or i won't be able to finish that. me and my bff still has this one project we started around like 2018 lmao we both still haven't finished it or picked it up bc we developed the idea sm and got so close to it that we fear writing it now.

not OVERSHARINH I WANNA KNOW!!! NO but like FR wattpad went through the biggest glow down IVE EVer seen like. it's legit LEGIT inhabitable. like at first you take away the newsfeed?!? like how am i gonna pine over other accounts now?!? and then everything became paid and shit like wtf is that?!

omg i wonder if I ever saw you on my explore page or tags bro fr this is so interesting my ig handle has always been one tbh it's @celestialsoo ( my intense love affair with kyungsoo era) like since the dawn of the day.

YOU LIE!!!!! i wish i could fr draw tho i want to draw my muses :///

#love mails from my beloved anon!

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eviltiddyproductions · 11 months

Text

Crash Course in Romance : Episode 2

Probability of Encountering Your Enemy at Your Worst 😂 what are title

Waittttt, he used to eat at her place years back too!?

She said daughters, so the girl must be our handball girlie's real sister. I assumed it was a friend 💀 (everyone can be an aunty!)

KDRAMAS ARE GOING TO HELL OMG why do they sneak these parental deaths on me so casually 😭🙏 y'all hate me. my god

this poor bean

i knew that aunty would feed him regardless !!! god i love shop owners who recognise you. always there for you

oh my god, she's been taking care of that girl for THIS long

our man is literally there in the restaurant grieving over his dad's death as this baby gets dropped here by her mom 😭

she just handed our baby a note ??? at least have the guts to ask your family. bffr 💀

NO WAY HER MOM DIED I'll actually stop watching you cannot take 2 parents from me in 5 minutes ???? even Vincenzo was gentler and gave me some time!!!

her mom really died nooooo

y'all hate me SO much

i think she might have to give up on her handball :/

this coach cannot be real lmao no one talks like this irl to someone's face 💀 'she isn't even your daughter, I'll let you go if your niece dies' like she's just late for practice bitch ass.

punch him !!!

why is he making her pick oh my god YOU CANNOT BE SERIOUS.

idk what's up with me but her wanting to call her aunt her mum and having the brightest of smiles calling her mum and running to her got me

i am again reminded of the quote that goes kids forgive so much and just want to be loved

this show is aesthetically so beautiful

is that her friend from handball helping her or someone else? :0

a loyal friend <3

is he in therapy or is this just a normal doctor

is that husband in Phillipines a cover story?

i admire the ability of anyone to eat anything in an all white outfit

oh bae i hope you don't get nauseous

that's a cool decomposer!

'you're all i have' is kind of a terrible thing to hear as a teenager 😭

did she put money in the cabinet

WHO'S THAT in her house

wait everyone has iphones here ??? lmao no Samsung z flip in sight

lmao he's dressed like a delinquent to get breakfast

look at him squabbling with her over when the shop opens. the way they don't know his classes are the reason for this 😂

LMAOOOO remind me not to cross her, her bad luck wish for him got to him real fast. although slipping from your chair is funny and not to bad 😭

sister don't move so much I'm scared someone might push you and take your number.

SHE'S JUST LIKE ME FR. she was praying bad and took back the curse on that man and was promising all the good behaviour she could muster and then realised she's not gonna get the ticket and started complaining. #real

SHE GOT IN !!! SHE GOT THE 100th ticket

now why is the topper side eyeing my girlie, keep your side eye to yourself !

I love them. They're planning his fake murder in front of him 😭😂

I'm definitely not as hardworking as our girlie so I'm going to say I'm her friend because she deadass goes 'he kept looking at you, he's so into you' 💀 #mypeople

oh no my sister hasn't dated AT ALL?!!!! (She's just like me fr)

that girl is a hater for the sake of it but i get it i guess. sometimes you have weird hate vibes with people but tbh she's in a kdrama so I already know she's going to do something extremely messy.

him saying don't work too hard to his assistant is so funny actually

ahhh I checked the tags and this show has me giggling and squealing why does it look THAT cute

he got her a phoneeeee

Oh my god the stalker girl got shot ??????

kdramas without a criminal angle in some capacity challenge: failed (except bokjoo i guess) I'm not complaining. I love being anxious

girlfriend has a fling coming to pick her up !!! have fun bae <3

wait him entering the shop at night, this is the scene i saw in the previews

this is the worst story someone could've come up with it to give someone a free phone lmaooo 😭

i love her friend she's like 'what did I say, 100% in love with you'

oh so this teacher actually knows our man chi yeol.

what is this bitter ass conversation 💀 SO UNSERIOUS why is this random old classmate teacher talking like that.

I will actually climb inside and scratch him. Came here to just guilt him about a student's death and be way out of line in general. Oh my god he keeps going ???

so nasty

awww babe you shouldn't be driving in this state

oh they just missed each other

it makes me happy that he at least came back to eat

aww my sweet little brother on his morning walk with his coffee and his waffles. (this is how i want to be omg)

aww she gifted her mom that cushion

lmaooo what was that text girlie 😭🤣

awww he's offering her his seat i love them !!!

oh no what if she asks him out on a date 😭

oh she's politely declining the self phone

lmaooo Jae woo (the brother) clocked our tiger man 🤣

OH MY GOD HELLO?!!! SOMEONE SHOT THAT METAL BALL THROUGH THEIR WINDOW

my sweet girl gathered everyone, even Chiyeol who was just standing 💀 like babe get down!!!

oh this glass repair will cost her 😭

I think staying here probably saved him from getting shot alone

#crash course in romance #episode 2 #WHAT JUST HAPPENED????#written update

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dogmomwrites · 1 year

Text

Find the Words!

This tag came from @menagerie-of-monsters, so thank you for the tag! I'm gonna pass it along with soft tags to @monstrousfreedom, @sleepyowlwrites, and @regalserpent, as well as an open tag for anyone else who wants to join!

Your words will be flower, panic, shift, and witness. If you can't find one, leave a fun fact about your WIP, OCs, or writing process!

My words were silent, star, stop, scar, and surround. These excerpts were taken from yet another WIP without a name (RIP that WIP lmao)

Silent Derek placed one finger on his lips and he fell silent instantly. “Don’t even start that.” His face was dead serious, a slight frown creasing his brows. “I’m not a kid, you just said that. We’re adults. We can make decisions for ourselves. If I want to fall for someone nine years older than me, then dammit, I will. If I want to fall for someone nineteen years older than me, then dammit, I’ll just go and do that.” He paused to drive Karl crazy by slowly licking his lips. “Yeah, I had some wine. Yeah, I’ll admit I’m a little bit of a lightweight. But no, I’m not drunk, and I’m definitely not so drunk as to get sloppy with the first guy I see. I usually save that for when I’m sober.”

“You—”

He cut him off with a kiss. A gentle, tender kiss. No tongue, just a quick pressing of lips. “Go. I’m a big boy, I can wait.”

“You fell for me?” Karl asked, feeling more dazed than he probably should.

Derek let out a soft, awkward laugh. “You caught that, did you?” He was starting to blush again, but instead of saying anything else, he just shoved Karl out the door and shut it in his face.

Karl stared at the door for a moment. “You fell for me?” he repeated quietly, though Derek could no longer hear him. That was not at all how he’d expected the night to go.

Star He was staring. Derek had to wave his hand in front of Karl’s face before he jolted out of his thoughts, which had quickly turned inappropriate.

“Hello? Earth to Karl.”

“Yeah, I’m here. Karl to Earth, I’m on Earth.” Why did he say the things he said? “We need to get out of here, find somewhere safe.”

Stop He saw Karl and stopped, panting. As often as he had to chase the bus, one would think he’d lose a little weight, but it looked like he’d actually gained some since last week. “Hiya, Mister Odin!” he wheezed.

“Hey, Quinn,” Karl said good-naturedly. In every way possible, Quinn reminded him of Chunk from the Goonies movie. Maybe that was why he liked him.

“Watering your flowers?”

Karl stood in his front yard, hose in hand. The water sprayed in a gentle mist over the bed where several kinds of flowers grew—irises, tulips, jonquils, petunias, pansies, and a few he didn’t know. “No, I’m hunting elephants.”

Scar Slightly embarrassed, Karl kissed him. He felt like a kid the way he was leaning over the rails, but he felt Derek’s smile, and that made everything okay. “I love you. Wait.” He felt the frown against his lips.

“Wait?”

“Yeah, I didn’t mean that.”

“What?”

“Shit.” Karl put his head in his hands to hide his face. “I meant it. I did. I just didn’t mean to say it. I messed it all up—”

“Why not?” Derek asked, interrupting before he’d even finished speaking.

“What?”

“Why not say it?”

He frowned, confused. “It’s too soon.” His frown deepened. “Isn’t it?” Things had always moved a little quicker for him than for most people, or so he’d been told. His habit of forgoing the filter between brain and mouth had scared off as many relationships as it had sped up.

Surround Don’t have this word in this WIP, but tbh it’s under 10k, so I’m a little surprised this was the only one I didn’t have. Anyway, onto the little fun fact!

This drivel was technically based on a dream I had when I was around 16 or 17, but hadn’t actually gotten to the part that was in the dream. I wrote a couple short chapters to fill in the blank lead-up scenes…and then I kinda forgot about it. Whoops?

Lately I’ve been struggling to find one of my WIPs to work on, as I can’t seem to settle down on anything, so I started going through some older WIPs and found this one. So that’s why you get these random excerpts! Hope nobody minds something unrelated to any of my other stuff!

#find the words #find the word tag #tag game #writer games #open tag #open to everyone #my writing #yavs writing

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asksep · 2 years

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Inspired by some posts in the tag. Was there ever a moment where it actually hit how fucked up some of the shit that's happened to u was

There's been quite a few, it's definitely more of a process than just one "oh fuck" moment. This is probs gonna get long so I'll just give you some of the biggies so far (I'm fully expecting them to keep happening rip)

1. The first anniversary of Jennas coronation. Milo thought a fun thing to add to the celebration would be some fireworks he'd found travelling somewhere. at the time none of us had seen them before so from his description we just thought they were cool lights in the sky. When it turned out they sounded exactly like gunshots it got less cool very quickly. Jen and Marcia had a bit of a scare and jumped but could work through it to watch them. I ended up panicking so much that I accidentally Transported myself back to the wizard tower and barricaded myself into my room because as far as I was concerned I was being shot at. Finally calmed down (mostly) the next day and had a very definite realisation that being shot at shouldn't be a normal part of anyones life let alone a child's. Ended up staying with Marwick for a couple of days because everyone else was very understanding but they didn't really get that it wasn't just bad memories of one event but constant repeated exposure to it. Spent a good while after that in fight or flight mode which I think was made worse by the previous year being pretty calm and uneventful so it was a Big step backwards.

2. William being born. Not much to say about this one. He was born, I realised how small children are and then realised that if anybody tried putting him through what I went through I think I'd kill them. Big step towards accepting that everything was fucked up rather than me just being bad at dealing with it

3. Rose's first time dealing with someone dying in the Sick Bay. There was an elderly wizard that passed in the sick bay a few years ago. It was about as good as dying can get - it was peaceful, painless, and her family were there with her as it wasn't unexpected. Rose had to help deal with the body afterwards and she later came to me half upset, half freaking the fuck out. I could understand why she was upset but didn't get why she was so freaked out by seeing a body (particularly one with no injuries or anything). I straight up said to her "I don't understand, surely it's not your first time seeing a dead person?" and I was very promptly informed that it was in fact her first time and that most 16 year olds have never seen a body. We then ended up freaking out for each other, me because oh my god she'd never seen a body before is she okay and her because oh my god how many bodies has he seen is he okay. I think we understood each other a lot more after that which maybe wasn't a good thing lmao

4. Turning 18. Way back in the young army me and marwick made a deal that if we both made it to 18 alive we'd take the day off (which you were allowed to do in the actual Army) and buy a big cake and eat it all to ourselves. Actually turning 18 really got to me because a) I made it to 18 when I never really expected to, b) we were children fully expecting to die so young and we thought that was normal, and c) its so sad that the most radical, exciting, out there dream we could think of at 8ish years old was a day off and eating some cake. We both realised how fucked up that was, young army wise as well as everything that happened after to stop us thinking we'd live that long. We kept the deal though - i bought a 3 tier wedding cake which was too big to move easily so we just sat in the alley next to the shop to eat it. Sobbing into that piece of cake was a big moment of letting go. Of all the stuff I've talked about here, this was the only one that was truly cathartic.

#theres so much else to go along with this but these are the big ones #had a nightmare dealing with finishing my apprenticeship #first time in my life i didnt have my next step planned out for me #beyond becoming EOW at some point #and i really couldnt cope with that well #fucked up that beyond the holidays marcia made me take I'd never had any time Not working #also i once got invited to a costume party where you had to go dressed as what you wanted to be when you grew up #that messed me up because i never even thought about it before becoming marcias apprentice #people had dreams? weird #and even with all this its mostly just me realising that the YA was fucked up #feel like i havent even started processing the simon stuff and the marcellus kidnapping stuff and the queste and the syren and rimg wizards #spent so long after the two faced ring was destroyed just relieved that it was all finished #before stuff like this started happening and i actually had to deal with it for the first time #and im not in survival mode anymore so i cant just power through #definitely gets worse before it gets better #but im learning to cope #im not having panic attacks and flashbacks at seemingly random things and nightmares every day now which is something i guess #thanks for the ask btw it was therapeutic to get it all out #sorry its so long

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albatris · 2 years

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ok i am terribly curious: what is a frankendraft. i saw that term multiple times in ur atdao tag and i am full of Wondering over what it means

oh hell yeah, the frankendraft! that's not a term I've used in a while!

anyway this is gonna be a super jumbled long ramble post, I'm so sorry, I have a lot of trouble explaining things concisely dhgdjkghd

okay, so, it was...... TECHNICALLY invented as my own personal "outlining" method for ATDAO, and you will see why that is in quotation marks as this post goes on :P

so the official name for the frankendrafting technique was "outline first draft frankendocument" but this is a mouthful so it got shortened to simply "frankendraft"!

in short, a frankendraft is basically a very very VERY bare bones shitty first draft, except I couldn't call it A First Draft at the time lest I intimidate myself out of working on it. a frankendraft is basically writing every single thing that happens in a story from start to finish in the form of like

X does this. Y says this. this happens. then this happens. which makes X feel this particular way. then this happens. which makes this happen. etc etc etc

I cannot emphasise enough that this is NOT in brief dot point summary form. this is in chapters. this is the Full Fucking Story. here is an excerpt from the frankendraft to illustrate my point:

"Noa is hesitant to leave Alice alone, and feels it would be inconsiderate. Plus, she's worried about how the rest of the DII will receive this, whether they will view her as reckless and irresponsible. She goes to her car to get a blanket for Alice, and then searches her back seat to see if she has anything in the way of spare clothes for herself. She locates one of Tris's hoodies she has been procrastinating giving back to him because it's huge and comfy, and puts it on."

the whole thing is basically just like. stage directions. me explaining the story to myself. lmao. it's literally all the same level of bland and undescriptive and bare bones from start to finish. I've won NaNoWriMos with how lengthy the frankendraft is

now, the whole thing may seem kind of dumb and you may be like "so what is the benefit of that?", but here, hear me out, I had my reasons, yeah. and it's actually a KILLER technique if you're not quite a plotter and not quite a pantser and you're also an over-anxious perfectionist stresshead with brain fog and a complicated plot you need to wrangle into cooperation

it functioned as an elaborate trap I could lure my anxious perfectionist writer brain into where I unwittingly spin together a coherent draft without realising

but mostly, like, in hindsight, I was SCARED of writing so I'd freeze up, and the frankendraft was excellent for helping with that! interestingly, the frankendraft was an approach I needed to use for ATDAO, but not one I've needed for Rental Car which means I've definitely made progress on the perfectionism and fear side of things! :D

now, here we fuckin go, The Longer Explanation Of Benefits Of Frankendrafting -

so, story time, there was like a five year period where I was getting NOWHERE with any of my work, and I was grumbling about it when I had the following realisations

pantsing wasn't working for me because I'd freeze up and find it super daunting, I struggled with just Throwing Myself Into a scene right off the bat with no guidance. even if my brain knew exactly where the scene needed to go, I hit blocks. no thoughts head empty. plus, the plot of ATDAO had so many different threads going at once that trying to keep track of everything While Writing A Genuine Engaging Story was too much for my confused little brain 2 handle lmao

and at the time, writing was an extremely anxious act for me! lots of perfectionism, lots of stress, in the midst of relearning how to Have Fun Writing again, blank pages are intimidating, blah blah, usually I'd psych myself out so bad that my brain stopped completely

so I thought to myself, "hey, if you're struggling to keep track of what you need to be doing and all the stress is too much at once, you probably need an outline!"

but traditional outlines don't work great for me either, see, 'cause I struggle to condense things and figure out what the Important Key Points are that I should be putting in my summaries and dot points. outlining that way feels restrictive, it doesn't express what I need it to, it doesn't help me at all when it comes to actually knowing what I need to do in a scene

'cause like, in my outline, the scene is just a brief description of what's happening, but there's so much OTHER stuff I need to keep track of, like. how does this scene progress, what are the feelings, what other plot elements are at play, where am I at with symbolism, characterisation, what's the dialogue like, what parts of the mystery are at play here

a lot needs to happen in a scene! and without having it ALL laid out for me I'd still hit blocks

so then I was like. "what if instead of either trying to write a full story right off the bat OR trying to fit the jumble of garbage inside my brain into a Nice Neat Outline while trying to make said outline resemble my plot in a way that actually helps me know what to write..... what if I just included literally as much detail as possible in my outline. what if I just included All Of It"

so I did!

I just started typing up descriptions of what happens in the scene line by line. here's an action! here's a symbolism! here's a dialogue! feelings! another action! telling the story without bothering to make it a Story, without descriptions and prose and whatever. just straight facts. not bothering to make it sound nice

Me Explaining The Story To Myself. me telling myself line by line what I need to do

and this worked FANTASTICALLY. I was coming up with fresh ideas, I wasn't scared, I was having important plot realisations, things were coming together and making sense in a way they hadn't for years c: I was finding ways to join scenes that were previously just floating and disconnected together into a coherent narrative, without the stress of "oh fuck I'm writing a story"

(and it WAS stress at the time, writing a story. I had a very dicey relationship with creative writing for several years)

but anyway yeah...... I could just trick myself into writing a first draft without ever acknowledging I'm writing a first draft

anyway this was also great for me because my two favourite parts of the writing process are 1. taking shitty words that already exist and transforming them and building on them to create something better, and 2. editing and revision. I realise now these are arguably the same thing at times

building and editing, these are my jams. I love taking some garbage and tweaking it and transforming it and finding better ways to describe things and swapping stuff round till it clicks

I could just go through an entire frankendraft like "I'm creating a hyperspecific outline, not a first draft" and then when I finished it I could be like "whew, a first draft, now the hard part is done and I get to do the fun stuff I love!" which is editing, revising, building, transforming this bare bones mess into something genuinely lovely

"but logan doesn't that take away from the mystery and fun of writing??? if you're so specific with your outline, isn't that boring??"

nope! it wasn't for me! I still got all the fun stuff, I just got it in a different way! I simply couldn't do the fun stuff and learning and discovery while I was ALSO trying to, like....... write a story, with style and description and finesse and drama and good words

plus, the most inspiring thing for me was not the Mystery and Adventure of writing (which, again, I still did get), it was my brain being free enough to just relax and write. which is why possessing a frankendraft that just directed me exactly EXACTLY where I needed to go was so freeing and wonderful!

anyway so that was The Frankendraft

long unnecessarily wordy explanation

it's a first draft! it's an outline! it saved my fuckin ass more times than I can count

it served its purpose and I haven't needed to use the technique recently! yeehaw

thanks for coming to my ted talk

#!! :D

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