#I'm beyond disappointed and frankly I was bored | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

shysublimecoffee · 3 months

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This represents my personal perspective on the matter, so please don't interpret it as a factual statement. It's an opinion, and there may be exceptions if you explore thoroughly. However, I find the otome isekai genre quite monotonous. The recurring theme of recycling concepts, reusing character designs with a prevalent "same face syndrome," and the prevalence of protagonists resembling each other, particularly the Duke of the North archetype with that clichéd Idol haircut, contribute to a sense of staleness. The majority of flawless female leads with 99% being blonde, with a few exceptions, adds to the predictability.

For me, the transmigration or reincarnation concept caught my attention around 2018, starting with works like "Who Made Me a Princess" and the infamous "They Say I Was Born a King's Daughter," even though I admit my taste was not the best back then.

The idea of taking over someone's body and living their life fascinated me. What made it unique was the perspective shift, allowing us to see many previously despised villains from other stories in a new light, experiencing the narrative from their point of view.

But, this is when it started getting old real quick. My god, how many fucking times am I going to see a good heroine turned evil and the villainous be taking the leftover men from the heroine side and forming a harem. The villainous unfortunately can't be nuanced because all these stories do is just make shit black and white. Our MC can't be held accountable for what they did but sob hard enough and we get an ally to ride behind her.

You know what's incredibly frustrating? These Korean women from the 21st century keep transmigrating into these villainous roles, and it's just downright irritating. They either come off as overly naive or stick to the tired narrative of being an office worker who suddenly becomes wealthy and tramples over others. It lacks uniqueness, and seriously, what do we really know about the female lead (FL) beyond the prologue? Who is she? What's her home life like? Does she want to return? These are questions I want answers to, but we're not given the chance because the focus remains on the villainous character. Even that aspect isn't executed well; they end up softening her character and making her more compliant than she was in the original story just to avoid a bad ending. I'm more intrigued by understanding the backstory of the actual original villainous character.

The male lead (ML) seriously disappoints. I get it, this genre revolves around romance, but let's get real for a moment—do we genuinely care about this so-called "romance"? What truly matters is the chemistry between characters that makes us feel, cry, and get infuriated, and that's what a story should evoke. Worse than a bad boy ML is a downright boring male lead. Whether it's the Duke of the North or any other generic character, they all feel like mere props catering to the female lead, and that's painfully dull.

I couldn't care less because these MLs exist solely to assist her in everything, whether it's for revenge, to play the savior, or to be the healer. Nothing feels genuine; there's no emotional investment in the romance for me. I'm not overjoyed by the idea of them being together. Many readers seem more fixated on their aesthetics and how well he serves her, but let's be honest—their designs are unimaginative, resembling countless other MLs and MCs. Frankly, I wish more effort were put into creating distinct and captivating characters.

No matter how much one might criticize the toxicity of old-school Shojou romances and the portrayal of male leads, I absolutely loved it. Sure, the romance might not be ideal, but that's precisely what makes it fun and enjoyable to read. The characters have their quirks and distinct personalities, creating their own unique dynamics that add to the charm of the story unlike the former.

Transmigration/Reincarnation is so barley touched in a genre surrounding that very concept. It's like they dip into a puddle but don't expand on the horrors or intrigue of anything really and they be explaining everything from the prologue instead of letting us breathe. We don't settle or sit with the characters and writers are far more interested in miscommunication. It's why I like manga because you get beautiful scenes of just peace or character introspection than you would in colored format.

If there's one story that truly captivated me and made me fall in love with this particular brand of Otome Isekai, it's "A Stepmother's Märchen." It may not be a masterpiece, but the deliberate and slow-paced narrative, reminiscent of a novel, along with the meticulous attention to depicting a semi-realistic high society, drew me in. The story offers complex and conflicted characters, and the stunning art, which interestingly mirrors European illustration outside of the main cast, adds to its appeal. Of course, it's not without its flaws, but the beauty of the narrative has made it stand out to me even years later. It's not a one-note copy it did it own thing that I wish OI did more.

Kill the Villanous,

Death is the ending the villanous

I appreciate how these stories took the isekai concept and added their unique twists. It's refreshing, and I wish more writers would follow suit. While I understand that Otome Isekai is primarily about wish fulfillment, I also crave narratives that offer more than just that. A well-crafted story with thoughtful character development would be a welcome addition to the genre because it sticks out to me more. I don't remember OI titles but for me to remember those is because the concept were different from the usual OH no I woke up in the villain body.

#otome isekai #manhwa

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silence-of-autumn42 · 9 months

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I can't pretend I'm not disappointed by the Gambit news from today's State of the Game post. But at the same time, I can't say I'm surprised either. I enjoy Gambit. I started playing during Beyond Light, so I've missed all the old Gambit stuff that everyone waxes nostalgic for. I enjoyed its current state. Is it perfect? By no means. Do I dislike the invasion mechanic? Absolutely. But it's a more enjoyable game mode, for me, than Crucible is, by *far*. Crucible is an exercise in frustration for me. Strikes are, frankly, rather boring when they come up so often. Gambit was more engaging than strikes, but not as soul crushingly painful as Crucible is. But I can still read the writing that's been on the wall since I started playing it.

I don't feel upset. I don't feel angry. I feel resigned. We all knew this was coming. We all expected it. And I just can't bring myself to care anymore. I'll probably still hop into the mode every now and then. But probably only to grab the shader. Oh well.

Crucible can still rot in hell though, fuck that entire mode. There is literally no way to make it fun.

#autumn's ramblings #destiny 2 #gambit

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bakedbakermom · 1 year

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Hey teacher if you actually think taking a socially isolated six year old, sitting her down with the class, and then letting them talk about ALL THE THINGS THEY DON'T LIKE ABOUT HER is an acceptable way to treat a child then we do not have a different approach when it comes to child development, we have a different approach when it comes to being a human fucking being.

I Do Not Care what class rules she struggles with, that is abuse.

Hearing my daughter cry for the last few days as she recounts what she's feeling in that classroom... I can't explain what that feels like. When she was born, and I held her for the first time, I was Changed. I've tried to explain it so many times and the best I've got is. How the Grinch Stole Christmas. When his heart grew three sizes and it broke the little box? I felt that. I felt my heart growing inside me as a physical sensation so strong it was almost painful. It's beyond words.

The pain I feel for her now is beyond words in the same way. I am physically sick for her. She has been pouring her heart out to me. The phrases she uses:

I just curled up in a ball at my seat and was crying. Teacher may was well have written "Talk about Stupid (name)" on the whiteboard.

I'm worried I'll never be able to be happy at school again, and then maybe I'll never be able to be happy at all ever again.

Imagine if someone took a tiny baby, and they just put it in the trashcan. Teacher does that to me over and over.

Teacher only talks to me when I'm doing something wrong, I'm scared to go talk to her when I need something.

I'm a good kid! I know I am! Why can't Teacher see the angel in me?

I'm always crying at school and I hate it because they all think I'm a baby.

Teacher is always frowning at me. I hate my whole life right now, except my parents.

And she was singing the "I Wish I Wasn't Different" song from the Movies episode of Bluey. And she's got a fucking stress rash on her hand because she can't stop picking at herself.

SHE'S SIX FUCKING YEARS OLD.

I am astounded by the depth of her pain and I'm only feeling the echo of it in that piece of my heart she made.

This woman made my child feel that. To say I am incandescent with rage is barely scratching the surface.

I kept her out of school today (and gave her the best self-care a 6yo could ask for*) and feel massively guilty I haven't taken more action much sooner. She WILL NOT be made to feel this way one more goddamn minute. Tomorrow we talk to the principal and we will make them make this right.

* Last night she was telling me it felt like her heart used to be all pink and happy and now it's blue and has a frowny face and tears falling down, and then it broke in half and now this half is all the way down in my KNEE (I am raising a delightfully dramatic child).

So today, we had a Fix Daughter's Heart Day. I let her download a few cute but dumb apps on her tablet and she got to play them in her jammies during breakfast - that alone broke 3 boring routines that she finds tedious. We went to Build A Bear. Frankly, we went a little nuts at Build A Bear. We got junky mall food for lunch. We went to the little candy store that has "disappointing gummy BEARS but the best gummy WORMS in the whole world."

We stopped at the grocery store and got a little bit of junk food, a stuffed toy from the impulse aisle, she picked out a card for her dad for valentine's day, and we chose the stuff to make her favorite dinner, which is also the one she likes to help with - she pushes the switch on the Cuisinart to shred the cheese, it's adorable and slightly terrifying and she is drunk with power, giggling the entire time. She got downtime to craft and color and read while I cooked and helped her with words.

And the whole time, we talked. That was the best part. She talked to me, and I talked with her, good stuff and bad stuff and silly stuff and sweet stuff, and I swear we really Saw each other today.

I checked in with her about the color of her heart a bunch of times throughout the day. (Her answers were incredibly specific, btw.) Tonight at bedtime she said it was all the way pink again, and it was shaped like a cat and it was purring and making biscuits.

I am trying my ass off to be the mom I wish I'd had, the mom she deserves, the mom who protects her and uplifts her and cheers her on and comforts her and teaches her. This shit is HARD. This shit is WORTH IT, but this shit is hard.

#i always thought that whole mama bear thing was a stupid white lady trend #i guess i get it now #liwl.txt #also you need to watch Bluey it's such a genuinely sweet and loving show #wow i really just had a flashback to livejournal holy shit #thanks for reading #hi yes blogging is my therapy now

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mimisempai · 2 years

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Dear Loki…. Chapter 1/7

Summary:

Loki, bored while waiting for Mobius in his office, starts to explore the drawers of his lover’s desk and finds a bunch of letters addressed to him...

Notes:

I love letters and I wanted to write the story of Mobius and Loki in the series through Mobius’ eyes for a long time. On AO3 Rating G

"Mobius!"

Loki walked through the door of Mobius' office, but found only the empty room.

He sighed and went to sit at Mobius' desk waiting for his return and dying of boredom after a few moments, he started to open the drawers of Mobius' desk.

He smiled, amused, as he opened the first drawer, where pencils and pens were arranged by size.

He opened the second drawer and seeing that it was papers he closed it again when his eyes fell on one of the words that surprised him.

Dear Loki

He couldn't resist the temptation and pulled out the piece of paper.

As he did so he saw underneath it a lot of other papers that began with these words.

Dear Loki,

Because I don't know if I'll ever be able to tell you all this so I'm writing it down on paper.

Today we met for the first time. But I feel like I've known you for so long.

When the analyst came to me to tell me that you had just been apprehended by the TVA, I thought, "Finally!

Finally I was going to be able to talk to you, get to know you, and maybe help you see who you really were.

You refused my hand in the elevator and frankly I can't blame you for that.

Loki smiled as he recalled that moment.

"I’m Agent Mobius, by the way."

"Are you taking me somewhere to kill me?"

"No. That’s where you just were. I’m taking you some place to talk."

Of course he had refused Mobius' hand considering his situation at that moment. He had had nothing but disdain for this little man who dared to mock him, a god.

"I don’t like to talk."

"But you do like to lie, which you just did."

"Because we both know you love to talk."

"Talkie-talkie."

Loki remembered that he had been boiling with rage inside. Not only because of Mobius' slight mocking smile, but especially because he had seen through him. Just with those few words, Mobius had shown him that he wasn't fooled by Loki. He had been able to see beyond his usual tricks and that was an unforgivable crime for Loki.

But fortunately everything had changed.

Loki resumed his reading.

I know I hurt you and right now I have no idea how you're going to react. I hate myself for using this kind of method. I hope one day you will forgive me. All those words I said to you were mostly just to make you react, or to make you realize that the truth was not what you believed.

If you only knew how disgusted I am with myself for having to show you those images of your mother, for having put that sadness in your face and in your eyes.

Loki swallowed, the memory of Mobius' words echoing in his head and the images of his mother's death flashing before his eyes.

"You weren’t born to be king, Loki."

"You were born to cause pain and suffering and death."

"That’s how it is, that’s how it was, that’s how it will be."

"All so that others can achieve their best versions of themselves."

But the bitter memory soon faded.

The fact that he was able to see his mother again and repair their relationship softened the bitterness and pain he had felt that day.

Mobius had not told him anything else at that time except what Loki already knew. Loki knew that this was what everyone thought. He was used to these words spoken in anger or disappointment. But Mobius had said it to him in a calm tone of voice, and it had stung Loki to the core.

Loki knew it now, Mobius did not believe in his own words, he had said it again and again to Loki, obviously feeling guilty about these cruel words.

And if Loki had not been convinced, the next lines of Mobius' letter would have convinced him.

You are so valuable Loki. You are worth so much more than your mistakes. If you saw yourself with my eyes you would know. You would know that I believe you are capable of great and beautiful things. And I hope to be there to see you believe in it and accomplish it.

I hope that you will be able to accept the hand that I will hold out to you despite these words between us.

I hope with all my heart that you believed my words when I told you that I didn't see you as a villain.

Loki remembered with emotion that decisive moment in his relationship with Mobius.

Of the impact of those words on all the events that followed.

Of their impact on his life.

Of the surprise he had felt at Mobius' words when he was expecting to receive the final blow.

"It’s the cruel, elaborate trick conjured by the weak to inspire fear."

"A desperate play for control."

"You do know yourself."

"A villain. "

"That’s not how I see it."

Mobius had said those few words to him and when Loki had looked up at him, he had seen that he meant them. Because never had someone looked at him with such kindness as Mobius had at that moment. It had been completely new. Even though at that moment he was still wary and full of doubt, those words from Mobius had begun to help him change. For the better.

Thinking back warmly to that moment, he resumed his reading.

In my wildest dreams, I imagine that one day we will read this letter together, or that I will be able to tell you everything I can't or don't feel entitled to tell you yet.

That we will laugh about these events.

Or cry about them.

Or that we will remember them as the foundation of our relationship, whatever it may be.

With hope.

Mobius.

Loki, moved by the depth of Mobius' feelings revealed in the letter, thoughtfully ran his thumb over the signature at the bottom of the letter.

Mobius had never once thought badly of him.

This letter was only the confirmation of what Mobius had been telling him since the beginning.

Stunned, he was about to grab the next one when the office door opened, startling him.

"Loki? Ah you're here!"

Casey had just entered.

Loki, wanting to hide what he had just done exclaimed theatrically, "Casey!!! My friend! How are you?"

Casey looked at him suspiciously before saying, "I'm fine, thanks. Mobius told me to warn you that he wouldn't be back for a few hours. Although I'm not a mailman, I came to deliver this message to you."

Loki clapped his hands and exclaimed, "Perfect! I'll wait for him here then."

Casey, long accustomed to Loki's whimsical behavior, replied, "Fine, then I'll go."

Loki smiled and waved goodbye.

Once Casey closed the door behind him, Loki sighed, "Haaa, not back for a few hours, huh? Let's see what you wrote to me, love."

He grabbed the next letter and, leaning back in the desk chair, stretched his legs out in front of him.

He began to read.

Dear Loki...

_________

Still not beta'd

Still not my native language

Still hoping you'll enjoy this story 🥰

Still thanking you for bearing with me 😝

Other chapters here

#lokius fics #lokius #loki series #loki #mobius m. mobius #moki #wowki #lokius rights #lokius forever #loki x mobius #fluff #mobius m mobius #tooth rotting fluff #established relationship

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cornytrashlord · 10 months

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🌘x🎇

TW: suicidal ideation , mentions of violence

It's 3am. 🎇stared up at the worn ceiling tiles of the empty subway station from his frankly less-than-comfy spot on the train tracks, usually warm and buzzing with static from the running trains.

But now there was only silence and a biting chill that ate at him even through his old, tattered sweater.

The lights in the station were buzzing on and off, reducing the cobwebs, dust and dirt smears of the ceiling overhead to infrequent flickers.

He was…thinking.

What would it be like to be run over by a train? It'd be so easy to find out. He'd imagine himself walking in during the day, stepping right off the platform, screams of horror in his ears, sickening cracks and bursts of pain…. The thought made him laugh.

No, he wasn't necessarily suic!dal. He was bored. To him, the world felt overpopulated by people who lived without actually living and he was the only one truly alive among the masses…

"Hey." There's a man in a gray hoodie towering over him, peering at him through thick-rimmed glasses. "If you want to get run over my train that badly, I can lend you a hand." The man cocked his head at him, waiting for a response.

He looked equally bored as he sounded. Just like him.

But what a curious thing to say to him. It piqued his interest. "And, put my blood on your hands? No thanks,"🎇muttered with a faint amused smile.

"That's a shame." Instead of boredom, the stranger sounded disappointed.

The way he said it made🎇's skin prickle. What were the probabilities that someone else in town was as sick in the head as he was? The thought was as comforting as it was sickening. "Why? Did you want to push me into a running train that badly?" He giggled.

The stranger offered a mysterious smile in response. "Maybe I do. Maybe I don't. You know how the suic!dal ones almost always regret it the moment life drains from them?"

"Sounds like you're familiar with death, man."

"Because I am." The spark of curiosity kindled a small flame of interest at that. He felt a smile tug at his lips as he finally took a true look at the man—a man far more alive than he initially expected. There was something rotten in his gaze.

"Say, what's your name, Mr. Stranger? I'm Rgis Altr."🎇introduced himself with a giddy grin, only for the man to cock an eyebrow at him.

"🌘."

"Okay, 🌘. Tell me more."🎇sat up, smiling nauseatingly sweet, like a beast baring its fangs as a threat.

Mint green eyes reflected a dead pitiless abyss, a stark contrast to the teasing lilt of his voice. His heartbeat began to quicken in exhilaration. "Do they squeal when you break their skulls open?"

There was a pause before the empty station echoed with🌘mocking laughter. He looked fascinated, charmed even. "I suppose they do." 🌘trailed a finger down🎇's cheek and lifted his chin up. 🎇could now see the endless icy void in the man's blue eyes behind the glint of his glasses.

They were both monsters hiding in plain sight.

They say killers were hollow inside and laughed even as they warped beyond recognition. That they were impulsive and indifferent to others, but that couldn't be further from the truth.

They simply desired and broke what they pleased to the fullest. It was simply their way of feeling alive.

#corny soliloquy #noctare

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popatochisssp · 3 years

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ok poppy i'm rereading some of your stuff and reading about proposals and my hopelessly romantic ass needs, NEEDS, to know how the new bois would propose to their s/o.

*cracks knuckles*

Romance ahoy!

Ash (Undergloom Sans): Pretty mundane, all things considered, he’s not really an over-the-top sorta guy. By the time he proposes, you’ve almost definitely had at least a handful casual conversations about getting hitched, just to make sure you’re on the same page about the idea. And then, you find the ring, hidden at the bottom of a basket of fries at Grillby’s (because of course it’s at Grillby’s) and the question in his eye-lights when you look back up at him. He won’t say it out loud, he wants you to have the out of shoving it back at him or maybe just quietly taking it if you’re not up for a scene--but if you lick the grease and salt off that puppy and slip it on your finger, you’re already in the best place to celebrate your engagement with all your friends and family!

Yrus (Undergloom Papyrus): Paralyzed by indecision on how to ask you, quite frankly. You’re his s/o, and very special and important to him, so he wants it to be perfect, exactly what you want... but how??? He spends months looking up proposal ideas, asking friends and family for advice, practically stressing himself to tears over how much he wants this to happen but just can’t decide on how to do it! You’re almost guaranteed to find out about it before he follows through on anything, and honestly, you should probably propose on his behalf. The tears will finally come then, but they’ll be happy ones, and hopefully the two of you can laugh about it later that it was his idea and he had everything ready, but you had to be the one to ask just to make it happen.

Brick (Horrorfell Sans): Once he’s decided that he really wants to be with you on a permanent basis, he’d like to make the proposal really special and memorable for you… but he doesn’t really have any ideas. He’s…not the most creative, or spontaneous, and everything he’s come up with feels boring or clichéd… In the end, the only thing he can think of is to just... rehearse and memorize a little speech-- the usual pre-proposal stuff, like what you mean to him, how much he loves you, the future he wants to have with you... He writes it all down, everything he wants to say to you, and drills it, over and over until he’s got every word down perfectly with no pauses or wrong signs or stand-in-words for what he actually means, like there usually are when you talk to him. When the time comes, it’s the skeleton-equivalent of muscle memory and he delivers his speech perfectly, flawlessly for you, ending on the classic ‘will you marry me?’ and watching carefully for your answer. (If it’s ‘yes,’ you can bet he’ll still remember the speech, word for word, years later and be able to repeat it to you whenever you ask-- your fifth, tenth, twentieth anniversary and beyond.)

King (Horrorfell Papyrus): Probably disappointing, honestly. He’s a very restrained and understated type of person, not the type to make a fuss, even about this. Honestly, you’ll be with him so long and so harmoniously that everyone you know will be assuming you’re already married before he’s ever said anything to you about it. And then, one day... he tells you that he’s looked into it and that it’d be relatively easy to make things official, he already knows the forms to fill out and the pieces of identification you’ll need, if that’s something you’d like to do. Not...very romantic...definitely not much of a wow factor... but you might feel at least a little flutter if you agree, because he’ll take your hand and press the back of it to his teeth and follow it up with, “GOOD. LET’S GET ON WITH FOREVER, THEN.” And he does mean that-- he only plans on marrying once, and you’re it for him.

Merc (Horrorswap Sans): You’ll find him in the kitchen, getting a little baking done. He’ll tell you, straight-faced and straight to your face, that he’s making a proposal cake...and ask if you’d like to help. You’ll probably assume it’s a paid project of his, for a client, and he’ll encourage your misunderstanding every step of the way. (Bonus points if you happen to have any comments--positive or negative--about the guy who’s proposing to his datemate with a cake!) The two of you will be flirting and cooperating and having a nice afternoon together making this cake--mixing the batter, putting on the frosting, carefully decorating it-- and it probably won’t occur to you that every part of it, from the flavors to the colors are exactly to your tastes... at least, not until he’s piping ‘Will You Marry Me’ on top and then spells out your name. The cheeky son of a bitch got you to help him bake your own proposal. He’ll slide the cake over to you with a patient smile while he waits for it to click, and to hear your answer to the question.

Ell (Horrorswap Papyrus): He’s definitely going to take a long time to get around to it, lots of hesitating and talking himself into and out of it. You’ll mostly likely be cuddled together, in the middle of the night, when he can’t wait anymore and nudges you awake to ask how you feel about doing something stupid. (It’s a prime opportunity for an ‘I’m doing you, aren’t I?’ joke, and honestly that might loosen a little bit of the tension for him if you’re quick enough on the draw to make it.) He’ll hem and haw and talk around it for awhile if you choose to probe into what he had in mind, but he’ll go for broke sooner or later and say that it’s marrying him, that he was thinking about. The stupid thing. That he...wondered if you would...do... He has a ring, which he fishes out from underneath the pillow, but the self-consciousness will start hitting him around then, and he probably won’t be able to look you in the eye as he sheepishly nudges it at you, waiting for your answer. If it just so happens to be ‘yes,’ well... he’ll probably be smiling into your shoulder all night and well into the morning.

Pitch (Horrorswapfell Sans): He wants an organic moment and he’ll wait as long as he needs to for a natural, intimate moment where it just feels right to ask. It’ll probably be a morning, early but not so early that the sun isn’t coming through the windows and making everything feel warm and pleasant as you start the day. Domesticity in its purest form, he’d most like to catch you getting some chores done with a little music playing, the perfect excuse to sweep you into a playful, spontaneous waltz across the floor... And somewhere between the twirling and the laughter and the kisses ruined by smiling, there it is--“MARRY ME...” No ring, no collar, and no real plan for what you might say after, but you can figure that out together, can’t you?

Nemo (Horrorswapfell Papyrus): He pops the question as far from home as possible, out in the great big world. The specific location isn’t important to him, it could be anywhere as long as it’s beautiful and new to him and he’s all the way out there with you. He may not have intended to come on vacation just to do this, so he’s definitely not prepared, but it reminds him how far he’s come and how he never could’ve predicted he’d end up here, with all this, and that inspires him; giving him the confidence to propose without hesitation. He’ll take your hand in his, look you in the eye, and just ask: “will you marry me?” He just...knows that it’s something that he wants and he hopes that you feel the same way.

Sunny (Gastertale Sans): Guaranteed to be a spur of the moment thing, completely off-the-cuff. After you’ve been together awhile, after it’s clear that you two are a Serious Thing and probably in it for the long haul, it could happen pretty much anytime, anywhere... but probably on some adventure you’re on, whether that’s an aimless drive to nowhere, a ‘hey I’ve never done that before, let’s do it’ outing, or even just hitting up a convenience store for snacks in the middle of the night. You’ll just be laughing, having a good time together, living in the moment, and he’ll catch your eye and… “hey. let’s get married!” Spontaneous, but not thoughtless-- if he says it, he means it completely, so there’s no need to worry about him taking it back. He’s just too excited about the idea to not tell you about it immediately, as soon as it pops into his head. Still, he won’t be offended if you doubt the offer at first, and he’d be very happy to talk it out with you--where it came from, how he feels about you, why he wants it-- until you believe him and can maybe start thinking about an answer to give him. Take your time, he can wait, as long as it’s with you!

Aster (Gastertale Papyrus): His is very much the Traditional Romantic Proposal-- a meaningful location for the both of you (where you met, first date, first said ‘I love you’, take your pick) where you can recreate that lovely evening with each other’s company and your fond nostalgia. You’ll probably have the sense that it’s coming long before he ever actually asks, but he won’t be hurried along for anything. You’re making memories here and everything in its own time! The biggest difference from his and the Traditional Romantic Proposal is that when it is finally time to pop the question, he won’t go down on one knee. He won’t do anything that might draw unnecessary attention to himself and to you, and won’t involve anyone else in this—no friends and family, no helpful waiters hiding rings, no spectators gawking at you in passing. This moment isn’t for sharing, it belongs to just the two of you: no pressure, no judgment, and no expectations, just a very simple, earnest question, asked with your hand in his. Before you’ve decided, he wants you to be comfortable enough to choose wholly without influence... and if your answer to the question is something to be celebrated, if your choice is him... Well, he’s happy to share that with anyone and everyone you please.

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theartofimaginaryfriends · 4 years

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Hey I'm the person that request that Apollo caught reader and Percy kissing. Could you do a sort of part 2 of that where she gets injured on the quest and Apollo/Lester has to tell. She's in critical condition and might not make it and Percy's a wreck. Apollo can only think of hyacinth. But happy ending where she makes it. I always feel awkward requesting 2 times on a blog like I'm bothering them. So if I'm bothering you I'm sorry.

Come Back to Me Part 2

Premise: Y/N got fatally wounded when the Waystation went under attack. When Percy found out, he refused to leave her side. Apollo can't help but think about his lover, Hyacinth.

Masterlist

A/N: This was going to be completely written yesterday, but I tend to write in the evenings and it was 1AM so I went to bed because I forgot I had a meeting this morning XD Also!! You are never bothering me sending in requests! If you have any other requests or just want to send in an ask feel free to do so and I will be more than happy to write it/respond to you! This fic is something I’m particularly fond of because I love Apollo’s character development in TOA, and it was fun to play with. There’s a bit more focus on Apollo than there is Percy, but I still really love it. Hope you do, too :D For context in this: Y/F/F = Your Favourite Food

The guilt Apollo felt worsened as he approached the apartment complex for the second time this year. This time around, however, he wouldn't find his daughter sprawled out on the Jackson's couch bored out of her mind from all the studying. He knew where she was, and he was afraid to break the news to Percy.

His hand hovered over the buzzer, and he took a deep breath. His companion on this trip – Thalia Grace – nudged him to remind him why he came back. He mentally prepared himself for what was going to come his way before pressing the button, and the same female voice greeted him like last time. "Hello?"

"Um, hi," the former God cleared his throat. "It's Apollo. I hate to stop by, but I have news that Percy's going to want to hear."

"Oh, I'll buzz you in," Sally's voice sounded as scared as Apollo felt. Percy's mother adored Y/N, and it comforted him to know she was being well taken care of. Especially because he couldn't.

He reluctantly knocked on the door, and this time was greeted by the teenager looking worried and exhausted, rather than annoyed at his arrival. "What the hell happened- oh hey, Thalia."

"Hey, Percy," the huntress gave her friend a sad smile. "It's about Y/N, can we come in?"

Percy nodded and stepped aside. The tension in the air could be cut with a knife, only increasing Apollo's nerves. He really hated mortal emotions, still not seeing the benefit to them. They never seemed to be helpful in any situation, but he couldn't control how he felt. Especially when the topic happened to be someone he cared about.

Sally, Percy, and his stepfather Paul led them to the small living room to chat. The son of Poseidon had an intense look in his eyes, filled with concern and resentment. Apollo had a feeling the resentment was directed towards him but opted to believe the opposite. He couldn't bear to look anyone in the eye as he told them what had happened.

Y/N was at the Waystation when it went under attack, and Commodus had his Germani holding her, Emmie, Georgina, and Leo hostage. In an attempt to help her escape, Apollo managed to reveal his true Godly form which blinded the New Hercules and his troops. In doing so, the Germani holding Y/N hostage wounded her before turning into dust. The wound was fatal, and it didn't look good for her.

Percy stayed silent as Apollo explained, his expression changing from anxious, to angry, and then distressed. Everyone present waited for him to say something, but it seemed as though he couldn’t. Sally instinctively brought her son into a comforting hug, and at her touch, the boy burst into tears. Y/N had been injured in fights before, but never severe enough that it was likely she wouldn't survive.

Apollo couldn't help but get choked up himself. He had grown fond of his daughter in the two months he spent with her on the Quest. Despite the constant near-death experiences, Apollo had gotten to know her beyond a hero. It was his fault she was in this state, and he was worried the demigod sitting in front of him would blame him as well.

"I need to be with her," Percy wiped the tears from his eyes, speaking more to Sally than anyone else.

"How safe is the Waystation right now?" The woman asked kindly.

"Percy will be in safe hands," Thalia answered, smiling as Sally. "I'll make sure he gets back to you in one piece."

"Go, Y/N needs you right now," Sally squeezed Percy's shoulder. As soon as Sally said that, Percy rushed to his room, and emerged with a duffle bag not even a minute later.

He hugged his parents goodbye and left with Thalia and Apollo. The demigod radiated anguish, causing the tension to increase between the three of them. Thalia glanced at Apollo, a look of pity in her eyes. She was worried about Y/N like everyone else, but she had a feeling she would be okay. It would just take time for her to heal.

***

Percy hadn't left Y/N's side since he came to the Waystation. Emmie and Jo were worried about the boy, trying to convince him to eat more than just some toast for the fifth time that day. Leo tried to help as well, noticing that his friend wasn't sleeping at all.

It had been two days, and Y/N's condition hadn't changed in the slightest. While Jo tried to convince the residents that it could mean good news, Apollo could tell she was as worried as the rest of them. This was a difficult wound to treat, and quite frankly it was a miracle Y/N had lasted this long.

Apollo couldn't help but think of Hyacinthus when he had dropped by to visit his daughter in the infirmary. Percy looked completely broken as he gripped her hand, reminding him of how he felt when his lover was killed by Zephyros.

In his eyes, Hyacinthus was the most beautiful man he had ever been with. The love that Apollo felt for him was still prominent to this day, causing the former God to compare all of his lovers to him. It still pained him to think about his lover, and the Hyacinth was a painful reminder of what he had lost. Due to Zephyros, Apollo would never feel a love like that again carrying the burden of grief for the rest of his Immortal life.

Percy felt the same way about Y/N that Apollo felt for Hyacinthus, and it broke his heart. The boy didn't even notice when there were other visitors around, and Apollo was convinced that the demigod barely even knew where he was at this point. The only thing Percy could focus on was his girlfriend, who seemed paler since the last time Apollo came to visit.

He held his daughter's free hand, finding himself praying to anyone that would listen. Don't you think this is punishment enough? Putting me in this pathetic mortal body, and putting my own life at risk? Y/N doesn't deserve to die, she has an entire life left to live. Please, don't take this away from her. She doesn’t deserve this.

***

Y/N had gotten herself injured before, but the pain this time around was unbearable. She was weary when she woke up, and only vaguely aware of where she was. All she remembered was being held hostage by the Germani, and a sharp pain as she shielded her eyes away from Apollo's Divine form. The next thing she knew, she was confined to a bed in an infirmary with... snakes?

The next thing she became aware of was the boy sitting next to her. His jet black hair was a mess, and his sea-green eyes were red and puffy. He had an iron grip on her hand, to the point that it almost distracted from the pain she felt from her wound. "Perce, you may want to lessen your grip a bit there."

Her throat was extremely sore, and her voice didn't sound any better. Percy didn't seem to care, though, seeing his girlfriend awake. Exhausted and in pain, but awake. He almost fell out of his chair in shock, amusing the girl to no end, but quickly recovered. The smile on his face was infectious, and Y/N was pleased to see him. "How are you feeling?"

She was about to reply when Jo came running in. "What's going- Oh! You're awake."

The old woman looked relieved and rushed over to give Y/N some nectar. It tasted like Y/F/F and Sally's blue cookies. Her strength returned enough that Percy was able to help her sit up. "How long was I out?"

"Three days," Percy answered, moving to sit on the edge of the bed. "We didn't think you were going to make it."

"You really think I was going to die?" Y/N snorted. "Gods, what a lame way to kick the bucket."

"Not funny," Percy crossed his arms and tried to look disappointed in her.

"It was a little funny!"

"No, it wasn't."

"Babe, you're smiling. " Percy rolled his eyes and leaned over to kiss her. He listened to Y/N as she recounted what had been happening the past seven weeks, overjoyed that she was back by his side.

The two barely noticed Jo leave the room and Apollo watching them at the doorframe. He was glad his daughter was okay and even happier to see her smiling. He wasn't sure if it was because his prayer was answered, or some sort of miracle happened, but he was grateful to know that she was alive. Apollo wasn't about to let Y/N lose the love of her life, especially at such a young age.

At that moment, Apollo knew that he couldn't allow Y/N to join him on any more quests – even if it meant fighting with her about it. She was meant to go back to New York with Percy, and catch up on the schoolwork that she missed. The former God couldn't take that away from his kid and preferred she live a boring life for a while. As long as she was safe, it didn't matter to him.

#percy jackson #pjo #hoo #toa #trials of apollo #percy jackson x reader

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helle-bored · 3 years

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Still thinking about how I went to a psych several years ago and she asked me textbook dsm-v questions and concluded I didn't have ADHD. The questions were like

"do you forget where you put your keys"

"do you have trouble remembering appointments"

And...I don't forget things? I know where my keys are and I'm reliably ten minutes early to appointments and class. (I wasn't ten years ago, but I learned.) My working memory for many things is excellent, even if I struggle with numbers, names, and directions. But working memory isn't the only hallmark of ADHD.

"do you make careless mistakes on boring projects or emails"

I mean... I have both anxiety and OCD to a frankly impressive degree. If I make mistakes I'm a failure and people will be disappointed in me for having, like, a typo in a paper, so I check my work multiple times before calling it done. I don't think I can answer this question the same way as somebody who might have ADHD but not anxiety or OCD, because for me, in a cage-match between carelessness due to inattentiveness and making absolutely, two-hundred-percent certain I'm beyond reproach in any way, the anxiety wins.

"do you fidget or feel like you're powered by a motor"

I'm chronically exhausted and I have EDS. Do you really think somebody with a condition causing issues with collagen formation and muscle tone is gonna have EXCESS energy? I'm out of breath when I stand up because all the blood is in my legs, and a twelve-year-old boy could beat me arm wrestling.

But if psychs screened me by asking things like...

"do you feel like any small reprimand or mild criticism means you should never inconvenience that person with your presence ever again"

"do you emotionally withdraw when you make mistakes"

"do you have difficulty falling asleep every night because you can't turn off your brain and/or your body feels restless"

"do you have trouble getting or staying organized"

"do you have a hard time finishing things you started"

"do you abandon projects you were extremely enthusiastic about once they either become too hard or too easy"

"do you have interests spanning weeks to years that you think about all day long without tiring of them"

"do you wish you could do more in life on a daily basis but don't know how to start"

"do you sit around daydreaming because making plans requires immense effort and involves multiple steps you can't even grasp enough to pin down on paper"

"do you have such a hard time making decisions that other people have to build in extra time when you go to restaurants together for you to order something"

"do you read two pages of a textbook and realize you have no idea what you just read, so it takes you twice as long to do your homework as it should"

...or any other of a myriad of things that emerging research suggests points to ADHD, as opposed to using a diagnostic tool targeted toward adolescent boys, maybe they'd have a different opinion of what's going on.

#i'm tired #i'm so so tired #new psych is seeing me in a couple weeks and in the meantime I'm vibrating inside over wanting to talk about this stuff #I've seen them once so far and based on the way they talked about eds and pots and stuff I'm carefully optimistic #that i won't be brushed off again when i say 'NOT EVERYTHING GOING ON INSIDE OF ME IS CAUSED BY ANXIETY'

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mostly-sentence-starters · 3 years

Note

Advice seeking anon here! I wanted to thank you! It was sort of about the technical side of rping and more on tips on how to deal with....the emotional side of things? But not like reactions/stuff going on in the threads I do have. But like...the disappointment of expectation.(Example that made me ask in the first place: Though unrelated but important to start off this with is that...I have friends who are mutuals but we don't write together. We do interact. Liking and commenting on posts and building a friendship that way. I am hecka anxious and I'm working on it. Like ya know, believing that mutuals DO wanna get asks from me and memes. But it's still disheartening when you send in memes they post, make starters, but they go unanswered with the other person later making posts about wanting more threads and being bored. I've had plenty of reasons myself as to why I can't answer certain threads. Ranging from time, RL errands or demands, or just the muse. I feel guilty they're not having fun but I don't feel like trying cos it's clear they're not waiting to hear from ME and so...I dunno, looking for tips on how as learn to calm my anxiety over not being the fix other people are looking for...but now that I've written this out, I'm guessing no one doing hobbies for free will be able to tell me much beyond...it's out of my control. And I guess to focus on what I can do.....I feel like being a kid again. Being in the same class with someone, even the same table and working together and being genuinely friendly but like...they still have their group of friend they hope to get hand written notes from.)

Hey there again Nonnie! There’s a lot to unpack here so most of it will be under the readmore! I totally get what you’re saying though and I have been mutuals with people similar to those you are describing. Of course every situation is quite different though, so keep that in mind.

First and foremost, of course it is important for people to remember RP IS a hobby. However, it is a collaborative hobby which means there is some mutual respect and decency required and communication is a must.

Of course real life / mental health / how much muse someone has / etc is a factor in how active a mun is. That makes sense and is valid.

From what I’ve noticed from my time RPing is that not everyone wants the same thing out of RP. A good chunk of people are more focused toward short on-dash treads/crack interactions, asks, writing headcanons, and plotting OOC. But not so much doing actual threads.

This version of RP quite frankly not for me, and it sounds like it's not what you’re looking for either. My primary concern is, and always will be the writing part of roleplay. This may just not be what this other person’s priority is, which may just mean you aren’t compatible. This doesn’t mean they can’t or shouldn’t RP this way--it just means it doesn’t mesh well for how you RP.

It sounds like you are putting forth an effort to extend an olive branch to them to RP. And that’s good! I do think it’s important to give people chances--to an extent.

But how you are describing what’s happening sounds very similar to some experiences I’ve had with RPers that have and issue with attention pandering/passive-aggressive behavior(x) on dash, which is very much not okay. If you have tried several times to extend a branch to them through memes/starters/etc. and the other person NEVER answers but is constantly or often harping OOC about how they want interactions but never send anything to other people and never answer asks you sent them yet still say they want attention/asks/etc?

That’s very guilt-trippy and acting like others exist to be at their beck and call whenever they want attention. And to piggyback on this post (x) you don’t owe anything to people who are not treating you with equal respect.

If this was a case where the mun had sporadic activity due to IRL/mental heath/etc. and thus can’t send in many memes to other people because of it, but do when they can but are just overall slow and sporadic with their activity? That’s fine (though it may not be compatible with all other RPers) it is fine and acceptable behavior to have a busy life and not be tied to your computer. But you should not be made to feel guilty for not showering someone with attention and keeping them happy 24/7.

I get very stressed out by seeing posts like “I’m bored! Come bother my muse! / Send me asks! / I want more threads! / I want more ships!” as well. Of course, in the end it’s up to you. Me however, I usually find myself unfollowing and dropping partners who do this because of the distress it causes me. RP shouldn’t be something that stresses you out to those levels or makes you cater to someone else’s every whim.

Honestly Anon, you may just have to let these people go. In my opinion, only from what I’ve heard it doesn’t sound like they are extending the same respect to you despite your attempts to make things work.

There are however, many people in the RPC who don’t do this type of thing that you will be far more compatible with and less stressed out by interacting with them. I personally recommend seeking those people out instead of giving chance after chance to people it sounds like it just won’t work out with.

But that’s only my experience, from what I can understand from your situation from this one ask. Maybe it is worth it to you to stick it out a little bit longer and see if you can make things work Perhaps filter/blacklist the mun’s OOC tag to stop you from seeing their posts asking for memes to be sent in and etc. and see if that helps.

But if RPing with these people bring you more distress than joy it may be time to let them go and look for some new muns to RP with. RPing got much better for me after I decided that interacting with people like that wasn’t for me.

I hope that helped a bit! If you have more questions feel free to ask (just may take me a bit! to get to)

- Mod Mudkip

#Anonymous #answered #not a meme #long post #modpost

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inkprintedfox · 4 years

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OC Study

Tagged by @advena87 to fill out -THIS- OC question prompt.

I tag @starsandskies @1orweth @kanawolf

This is time consuming so I can understand if you guys don't want to do it, so no pressure. I spent roughly a week and a half, almost two weeks on this? No regrets, mostly took so long for me because I work full time and I tend to space out a lot and ramble. Lol

It is quite a bit of fun and a good exercise to help develop your characters so I do recommend It! Don't recommend doing more than three OCs at a time though, three was hard for me and usually I'm an over-achiever. Go easy and dont burn yourself out! Also would be a good exercise if you're writing with a canon character and want to get a handle on working with them.

I wanted to answer this in character originally but it would have been twice as long and probably taken me a month or more. 😅 Perhaps I'll do something like that one day....

Dragon Age OCs per usual for me.

Warden-Commander and Hero of Fereldan (DAO & DAOA)

Growing up in the Denerim Alienage has made Feiell a very bitter, angry, and agressive person. Biting and scrabbling to survive she also had to fight to keep her family and neighbors safe from the rich humans that liked to exploit the destitute elves. She gained a reputation as a protector but also a very hard woman.

She redibly accepted her conscription into the Grey Wardens, not only to escape the persecution of the law, but also to escape the narrow world of the Alianage. Collecting the people that would later be affectionately called "The Blight Brigade" exposed her to many new adventures as well as lifelong friendships, love, and personal growth that could not have happened otherwise.

The Champion of Kirkwall (DA2)

Laid-back, vain, and honestly somewhat lazy, Aiden has never wanted to be anyone's savior let alone a whole city's. Family has been the only thing that mattered in his life and after his father's death, he naturally took on the role of protector and main provider for his mother and siblings. This also made it very natural to take in the stray band of misfits that became almost like family and also why it is so natural for Aiden to constantly help people, even at times he would rather not.

His bleeding heart drags Aiden into the center of conflict far more often than he likes and he constantly berates himself for it. This automatic altruism has jaded him which fuels his sarcastic and sometimes bitter, self-deprecating humor. A tad over dramatic at times means that while he rarely, it ever, says no to aiding someone in need, it certainly doesn't mean he has to be quiet about it either.

The Inqusitor (DAI)

Max has been fortunate for most of his life, from growing up in the wealthy Trevelyan family, to his good looks and, quiet frankly, fantastic smile it's easy to assume he'd be another spoiled rich brat. You'd be giving in to a stereotype that doesn't, quiet, fit him though. From a young age Max has always been outgoing and adventurous which made him a handful to raise. His father frequently grappled with finding things to keep his youngest son occupied in ways that he hadn't had to do with his previous three children.

Born with a naturally sharp mind and quick wit, Max picks up new concepts quickly and with ease. Which means he often grew board with tutors, burned through the family library in a handful of years, quickly became very competent on horseback as well as the breeding and rearing of them (part of the family business), and often terrorized his siblings as well as the hired staff. Once he exhausted most of the interesting things at home he started running off to search for new adventures. Boredom and frequent arguments with his father often lead to habitual bouts of running away from home. Hence where Max got to truly learn about the world and open his eyes to the kind of privilege he's been so lucky to be born with. Unfortunately this also has ingrained his habit of running away from problems he doesn't see a forward solution to. (*cough*theinqusiton*cough*)

OC Study

Featuring:

Warden-Commander Feiell “Fe" Tabris

Champion of Kirkwall Aiden Hawke

Inquisitor Maxwell “Max" Trevelyan

1. Is your OC easily bothered by things?

Feiell – Small things don’t really bother her but she is a tad hot-headed so if you give her a hard time you might not be in for the best experience. She also has zero tolerance for idiots or assholes.

Aiden – He’s a petty bitch that mostly whines and complains to annoy his friends. Also whining about petty things is a good cover for the bigger worries and anxieties he hides underneath.

Max – Mostly an easygoing, carefree type. It takes the numerous responsibilities of the Inquisition weighing down on him all at once before he starts cracking.

2. How easily does your OC make friends?

Feiell – Most defiantly not a people person. Her natural stoic demure and biting sarcasm keeps people at bay. You have to spend quite a bit of time around her before she warms up to you.

Aiden – For reasons he doesn’t really understand people like Aiden. It’s probably his easy smile and sense of humor which he uses to get what he wants or needs out of them. Not really manipulative just doesn’t feel like he deserves the attention. The humor mostly hides his pain and keeps people at arms length, mostly unintentionally. He hates to burden those he loves.

Max – Max loves people, mostly entertaining, or teasing them. His signature charming smile and good looks usually put people at ease which makes him very likable. It also lets him get away with the mischief he often gets into.

3. Does your OC go beyond what they have to do or do they usually do just enough work to get by?

Feiell – Has almost literally killed herself to get where she is. Her work ethic is legendary and she’ll do almost anything to support her family and friends.

Aiden – Will do the barest minimum to get by. Her lazy as hell, even though he is incapable of saying no when someone needs help.

Max – Believes in doing things right the first time and if not the first time then defiantly the second time. Whatever the job needs to get done he willing to do and if it’s a favorite project he can lose himself in it indefinitely.

4. Is your OC respectful of others?

Feiell – She will be as respectful to you as you are to her, but will out match you if you’re a dick to her or her friends.

Aiden – Respectful enough to not cause trouble and get people to leave him alone.

Max – Perfect manners, and ridiculously charming. He believes everyone deserves respect unless they prove otherwise.

5. Is your OC imaginative or more down-to-earth?

Feiell – Defiantly no-nonsense and down-to-earth. She believes in hard work to active your goals.

Aiden – More of a day-dreamer but pulls a practical side together to care for and help family and friends. Dreams are nice but plans put food on the table.

Max – Total idealist, truly believes even the most impossible is attainable if you work at it long enough. Most of that idealistic optimism is broken after Trespasser, but that’s a long story.

6. Is your OC comfortable with themselves?

Feiell – She’s always been comfortable with who she is and has never felt any shame for it. She owes that to her parents and cousin.

Aiden – Feels like a constant failure and a burden despite how hard he tries not to. Doesn’t feel comfortable with opening up about his feelings and weighing others down with them. Is also terrible with expressing more painful emotions.

Max – Is mostly comfortable with himself. Always felt like a disappointment to his family because he never had the kind of goals for his life he thought they would want from him. Also never really saw himself as reliable but the Inquisition changed all that.

7. Does your OC plan things and stick to it or do they make it up as their go?

Feiell – Always has a plan and is a master of adjusting things on the fly if needed. Prefers to stick to the plan but has accepted how rarely that can happen.

Aiden – He’s been winging his whole life and it somehow hasn’t killed him yet.

Max – Usually has more of an outline than a hard plan. Trial & error are his best friends and somehow he’s still alive, that’s probably because he uses educated guesses more that throwing things to the wind.

8. Was their life eventful before the start of the story, or was it more dull?

Feiell – Depends if living in poverty and oppression is dull to you. I guess since it was normal for her it was boring.

Aiden – The stress of hiding a mage father and sister was more than Aiden ever wanted. He would have preferred boring.

Max – While the constant mischief Max got himself into means things were never dull they certainly seem boring when compared to life in the Inquisition. Josephine certainly had her hands full going through all of Max’s past exploits.

9. Do they have the habit to insult other people?

Feiell – Is a salty, little bitch so defiantly yes. She has a sharp tongue.

Aiden – Bit of a smart-ass and occasionally he can’t help it so it gets him in trouble.

Max – Mostly no, it takes quite a bit to get on his nerves enough to make him snap at you. Usually very polite.

10. Would your OC be described as “the life of the party”?

Feiell – She can be described as the death of the party.

Aiden – Likes to think he is.

Max – Is the actual life of the party if he wants to be. Usually he is.

11. Are they critical of others?

Feiell – To a degree, yes

Aiden - Mostly critical of himself

Max – Not really, he’s pretty non-judgmental

12. Do they like art? what is their favorite type (paintings, songs, fashion, etc)?

Feiell – The art of war perhaps, but music is good too.

Aiden – He considers Fenris a work of art if that counts.

Max – Paintings, music, nature, pretty clothes (mostly on Dorian), Max loves it all. He was especially fond of watching Solar paint his murals.

13. Are they more accepting or more controlling of the people in their life?

Feiell – As long as you’re not bothering her and no one gets hurt she doesn’t really care what people do.

Aiden – He has no control over his own life let alone any one else.

Max – Very accepting of people but not above a subtle nudge to do things he feels might benefit them.

14. Is your OC a good listener?

Feiell – She listens more than she talks, so yes.

Aiden – The one who’s always there to listen when you need him.

Max - Yes, he also has a great memory so he's very good at keeping track of all the drama in life. Lol

15. Are they opinionated or more willing to change their minds?

Feiell – Pretty opinionated but not impossible to change her mind, not that it is easy to do so mind you.

Aiden – Too changeable at times and mostly keeps his opinions to himself.

Max – A few solid moral opinions that he won’t move on but open-minded on nearly everything else.

16. Are they the kind of person who’s always on the defensive?

Feiell – Much less than she use to be but definitely yes.

Aiden – Only when he feels blamed for everything, which he is often.

Max – No, he dose his best to own up to his mistakes and rarely takes things personally.

17. Do people like hanging around them? do they have a positive, friendly energy?

Feiell – I will file this under HELL NO. She scares the crap out of most people if she doesn’t piss them off. It can take quite awhile for friends to warm up to her, if at all.

Aiden – People love Aiden, but the older he gets the less Aiden likes people. They demand too much from him but he’ll never be able to say no, or miss a chance at a passive-aggressive joke. Or a regular bad joke for that matter.

Max – People love Max almost from the moment they meet him. There is just something about him that puts everyone at ease and makes it easier to trust and smile. Must be the charming smile, yeah, has to be. He’s not bad looking either.

18. Is your OC a procrastinator? if they are, what’s an example of how much?

Feiell – People die if she puts things off, so no. Some days she wishes she could put many things off though. Like dying anytime soon, there’s too much to accomplish.

Aiden – What is productivity? If nobody is dying or it’s not dragging him, kicking and screaming, by the hair then its probably not getting done. At least no time soon. Guilt trip him hard to speed things up.

Max – Important things get done but if it’s not a pressing issue then it often can be temporarily abandoned for more enjoyable activities. Even if it’s set aside, the thing will still be done in a reasonable amount of time. Unless he forgets, which can happen frequently.

19. Do they tend to panic in certain situations or are they more calm?

Feiell – Always calm, if something bothers her you’ll never know.

Aiden – Panics constantly. Somewhat hides it well…somewhat…

Max – Takes most things in stride, the sudden dump of responsibility and people’s lives was really stressful but he adjusted to it.

20. Are they vengeful?

Feiell – I literally made a post of her being a deity of vengeance lol.

Aiden – Petty or bitter, perhaps, but not full on vengeful.

Max – Yes, touch the people he loves and see a whole different side of him.

21. What are some skills your OC has a talent for and what are some that they worked for?

Feiell – She’s has a natural flair for swordsmanship, her mother started training her and Fe kept up the practice even after her mother’s passing. Her leadership skills were…a little more rough. She had to learn how to organize and lead people on the fly because of the Blight but luckily she learns quickly.

Aiden – He’s scary good at lying, not even Varric can catch him in one. (Honestly most of his book is just Varric's best guess on Aiden's thoughts) Knife throwing took quite a bit of practice though. He can now nail someone at 100 pages and is unmatched at darts.

Max – Politics and navigating the Great Game are weirdly natural for Max even though he kinda hates it. His archery skill is something he is extremely proud of because he’s practiced relentlessly to be as good as he is. And he really is good, until a natural like Sera comes and shatters his ego. Lol

22. Are they more socially awkward or socially confident?

Feiell – Awkward, but in the way that she doesn’t care what people do or say. She dose her own thing and ignores everyone else.

Aiden – Smooth on the outside, tired wreak on the inside. Not that anyone will ever know.

Max – Social chameleon, and life of the party. Until he slips away unnoticed somehow.

23. What is something really dumb that irritates your OC a lot?

Feiell – Dumb questions about her hair: “How long is it?”, “Why do you keep it that long?”, “Is it really that red?”. Usually answered with “Why do you care so much, it’s not your hair.” Also people touching her constantly, she doesn’t see the need to constantly clap people on the shoulder or grab their arms when somethings funny.

Aiden – Orlesians, if you don’t know anything about DA then I’m sorry, this probably doesn’t make sense to you.

Max – Assuming he's stupid or that because of his wealth that he doesn't do any work. He's a natural busy-body so assuming he sits on his are all day is really irritating.

24. Do they tend to see the good in people?

Feiell – No, she’s had too many bad experiences before so distrust is her default until proven otherwise.

Aiden – Sometimes, mostly sees people in shades of grey. No one is 100% good or bad.

Max – He sees the good in people as often as he can and tries to pull some good out of those who are sometimes a little lost.

25. What does it take for your OC to trust someone?

Feiell – Doing what you say you will, not hiding things, sticking up for others when it clearly has no benefit for you, and give it a few weeks….or months and she may trust you.

Aiden – Help him out in a hard spot, or help family/friends.

Max – If you’re not openly malicious or he doesn’t feel like you’re lying/hiding anything his default if to trust until proven otherwise.

26. Do they have a lot of mood swings?

Feiell – Not really, she’s not a very emotional person. Unless you count her temper which can light like a matchstick.

Aiden - Known to be moody, to the point of it being a well known joke among friends. On bad days he can even out do Anders.

Max – Only if the stress is overwhelming him or he’s pretty sick. Otherwise he’s pretty even tempered.

27. Do they like to be the center of attention or do they prefer to be in the background?

Feiell – Hates being the center of attention and would rather be left alone. Unfortunately she’s had to get use to the attention after becoming Warden-Commander.

Aiden – If people could forget who he is it would be really nice. Likes being the center of attention among friends and family, doesn’t like it with crowds of strangers.

Max – Loves entertaining people and making them laugh which makes him great for parties. He grew up attending big gatherings and is an expert at navigating them, which means he's also very good at slipping away from them when he tires of the crowds.

28. Do people think they’re pretentious?

Feiell – Sometimes, her natural expression can give that impression but most of those people that make this mistake are racist shems that don’t like the power she has. Or the fact that she could kill them without breaking a sweat.

Aiden – No, his face is too friendly and if that doesn’t do it the self-deprecating jokes do.

Max – Yes, it’s easy for people to assume that since he comes from money. He’s never thought himself better than anyone though and tries to dispel that impression, but you can’t control what people want to think of you.

29. Is your OC detail oriented or do they focus more on the big picture?

Feiell – Details, details, you add them all up and that’s how you get a bigger picture. Other words, very detail oriented.

Aiden – Big picture. How you get there is a mystery though.

Max – Big picture first then an outline of the main details to get there.

30. Which high school movie stereotype would they fit best?

Feiell – The ice queen/The strict, scary teacher.

Aiden – Class clown/Troublemaker/Weird but laid back teacher

Max – The jock that befriends the weird kid/Hot science teacher

31. Are they good giving advice?

Feiell – Defiantly not, she’s better at giving orders.

Aiden – Only ask if you want to get in trouble. Ok, that’s not completely true, occasionally he can give good advice. Particularly to help cheer someone up.

Max – I would say yes, he’s gotten quite a bit of good advice over the years and likes to pass it on.

32. Which one of the 7 deadly sins fit your OC more? do they see it as a flaw?

Feiell – Wrath: Only a flaw if you think beating your enemies is a bad thing.

Aiden - Sloth: Regrets this flaw. If he had acted sooner on many things they might not have escalated the way they did.

Max – Pride: A flaw he has worked hard to temper over the years. Was more of a problem when he was younger than now.

33. Is your OC more likely to keep their feelings to themselves or to share them?

Feiell – Keeps them mostly to herself. A couple close friends may get a glimpse but only Zevran knows her well. He’s learned when to prod to get her to open up.

Aiden – Doesn’t like to burden others so keeps his feelings to himself even when he shouldn’t.

Max – His oldest sister is his best friend and confidant, she gets to hear everything. Max has started to lean on Dorian in this way too. Basically immediate family and good friends will know what’s up.

#tag game #oc study #my ocs #oc asks #maxwell trevelyan #aiden hawke #feiell tabris #My OC: Feiell Tabris #My OC: Aiden Hawke #My OC: Maxwell Trevelyan

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ailuronymy · 6 years

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I'm the Warrior Code anon, and if you had the chance to improve any two codes (disregarding the last one bc no), which would it be and what would the improvements look like?

The thing is, when I say I like the code, what I’m saying is that I wouldn’t want to “improve” any of them! That’s not to say that “improvement” isn’t possible–it’s more saying that “improvement” of the code would be worse for the narrative and for the storyworld. Perfection is stagnant. It has no room to grow, change, or adapt. It is also without conflict, and therefore without tension.

Conflict is variance: when two or more things don’t fit together neatly but coexist in the same space, and have to be worked around or changed in order to fit together better–or at all. Conflict is incompatibility: when two characters have individual goals and worldviews that cannot (or will not) coexist, and require one character to concede to the other–or for both to compromise. Not every conflict is an outright or overt argument where one side is right and the other is wrong. Often, conflicts of these above kinds occur whenever one way of life rubs up against another, such as when the clans’ separate needs, beliefs, and traditions are not shared or in harmony with each other.

Conflicts also arise internally, within characters, when one way of life (the life a character is living–i.e., following the way of the warrior code) rubs up against the way of life a character believes they should be living (according to their ego and/or their moral code and/or their sense of tradition and/or their sense of self and identity–i.e., the warrior code is “wrong”). I believe the warrior code is the most necessary component of Warriors world-building, not only because it is the structure that literally shapes clan life and makes clans possible and mostly functional, but also because it is not a perfect system. Perfection is deeply boring to us as readers. Perfection is the counteragent to tension, and tension is the lifeblood of stories.

That’s what the warrior code is: fifteen points of tension. Fifteen starting places for conflict to arise. While these rules give sensible, practical guidelines for survival, their other use is to escalate the tension of the entire storyworld. When Mufasa says to Simba, “That is the elephant graveyard: you must never go there,” he is creating a boundary. A boundary in-world provides characters with something to be curious about, or to question, or to rebel against, or an obstacle to overcome or outsmart, or an opportunity to do character development and personality exploration–i.e., what does this character think/do about the boundary and what does this reveal about them as a person?, or any/all of the above.

A boundary to readers creates tension, because as soon as a character gets close to the boundary or steps over the boundary, they are put into danger (bodily, socially, etc.) and other conflicts often immediately arise as consequences for exploring beyond the boundary. Without tension, there is no story. By having fifteen rules that govern clan life, there are (at least) fifteen boundaries that every clan cat must observe at all times, and the fact the rules are limiting--or flawed--is what will at times make it difficult, or inconvenient, or impossible to avoid crossing those boundaries--and thus, creates conflict.

Take, for example, the fifteenth rule: a warrior rejects the soft life of a kittypet. When times are good, this is an easy rule to follow! Clan cats believe they are superior to non-clan cats, and their ability to live without relying on humans in any way confirms their belief. However, when bad seasons come, this rule becomes a source of tension for every character: do they follow the warrior code (and starve, or watch their family starve, or weaken and watch another clan take over their territory, etc.) or do they break the code in order to stay alive and protect their clan (which links to rule one of the code) but undermine their whole claim to being a “true” warrior by living “like a kittypet”? If they do eat, do they keep it a secret so no-one knows they’re breaking two rules--fifteen and three (elders, queens, and kits must be fed first)? Or do they speak out--perhaps against the leader (breaking rule thirteen: leader’s word is law)--to recommend that everyone break the rule and possibly face consequences for that, as well as possibly lose the clan’s respect if they disagree with the idea? It’s only one rule, but it provides a million cascading points of conflict!

If you "improved” the rule to be “a warrior rejects the soft life of a kittypet, unless they’re starving to death,” you lose that tension entirely. That’s what I meant when I said that “improvement” of a feature can actually be worse for the narrative and the storyworld. The only greater source of tension in the whole Warriors world is, in my opinion, the threat of extinction: each clan is constantly battling against the threat of their way of life/their literal lives being extinguished--by bad leadership, by bad luck, by the harshness of their lifestyle, by the other clans, by the possibly corroding and corrupting influences of other cultures/bad judgement, by divine intentions, by betrayal or weakness of spirit or lack of faith from its own members, and other threats.

This is why I believe the sixteenth rule is such a mistake. It is an (I would argue, successful) attempt to reduce all tension from the rest of the warrior code and, frankly, the Warriors world overall. The clans are separate because they are unable to live together. That’s the premise of the series. That is the tension on which the most basic concepts of Warriors are built. The greatest stake of the entire series–survival, the thing that all clans individually strive for, often in competition with each other--is most effective as a source of tension when it’s allowed to carry genuine weight as a threat and act as a catalyst of conflicts. The warrior code--the code formed to guide cats not only in the right way to behave, but also as guidelines for how to interact with other clans--becomes largely meaningless when the final rule is, “Protect your clan, patrol your borders, be loyal to your clan only, whatever--but when things are really bad, you have to help the other clans survive.Each clan must help the others so that no clan will fall.” Why, though? This is tonally dissonant from the rest of the series in a way that’s jarring, artificial, and sort of ridiculous. It has author’s fingerprints all over it.

So, essentially, I find the sixteenth rule a poor addition to an otherwise really useful, fun piece of world-building, and it’s disappointing to me that Erin Hunter couldn’t just... not. I know this isn’t the answer you were asking for, but the fact is, I’m fundamentally not interested in tailoring the warrior code! I think for some people there is an urge to world-build in a way that solves all problems before the story even starts, but this is not fruitful.

To give a (painfully simplistic) summary of my personal feelings on the matter: if things start whole, the story should break them, and if they start broken, the story should attempt to mend them or at least see what can be made with the bits leftover. It’s the process from broken-to-mended/whole-to-broken that makes a story into a story, and not just a description of a world. After all, if everything is perfect from the start and your story doesn’t break that in some way, what does your story do? Does it do anything at all?

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randomthoughtsgonewild · 7 years

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I'm back...

Hello.

I don’t really know how to start this if I’m honest.

It’s been a long while (yeah no shit dumb dumb *facepalms*) and well, things have happened. Some of big degree and some of little importance.

Current status?

I’m feeling shit.

Yes, you may leave. This will not be clean. But when I made this blog and when I titled the description, I meant what I said.

If you no like; bye bye stranger.

If you do but you ain’t into this type of honesty. See you later, mater.

…

So, where to begin…uh, I don’t have the best memory so I believe I shall start around Christmas time 2016.

Life was going semi-okay; school and personal problems were hassling but durable. But during that time I lost two of my mates; one of which I’m closer than the other. It was a whole group thing – we all decided to cast them away because of something they did (I would say what but due to its authenticity and specificity; I can’t take the risk of someone I know recognising it because frankly I’d rather have no-one I know in real life, knowing I am the owner of this blog— not because I’m ashamed; more so of the fact I am a very private person. Which is quite ironic considering I am quite open about everything and everyone— other than myself. But I digress.)

— and so my group casted them away and they were gone throughout the last term before Christmas break; it was hard because I lost my closest mate and my really good friend. But that was resolved quickly after the term and we’re all okay.

See? That wasn’t too bad aha.

Well, we haven’t got to 2017 yet and that’s when things start to go downhill…

So it’s the beginning of the new year and I guess you could say I was hoping for a much better year than 2K16. But when has Lady Luck EVER been on my side? Never. So, like the cow Lady Luck is; it brought me a ton of obstacles and hoops to jump through. To which I failed tremendously.

(I also forgot to add; Been alive for half a century, divided by 2 and subtracted by 10. Yay.)

In January; school had picked up and like the Army Officer it is, really started to tire me out. I was struggling with the work and the homework. It was a mess. It sounds fairly simple and in fact; I imagine many of you to be quite unimpressed by me because “kid, you don’t even know what tiredness is *rolls eyes*” — and you’re probably right, I do not. But you probably don’t know what it feels like to have to be up to the brim in GCSE coursework as well as revision because students love tests! (Wait–wait, maybe you do actually, okay well I had some mental stuff going on too so that counts?)

But again, I am straying off de topic. So anyways, Jan. Tiring. Made me very stressed. Stress is not good. Lotta spots for me, brother. I hate acne. Especially stressed-related ones. But. I. Digress. Again.

Which brings me to February; aww Feb. Poor, sweet, juvenile Feb. Always been a month that tends to fly by so quickly and probs the most boring – seriously though, what actually happens in Feb that is interesting? Nothing. That’s it. But, for me Feb; well Feb was an eye opener for sure. I’m not the type of person to beat around the bush for one thing so I’ll be out with it – quick'n'easy like a bandage.

I discovered two things; My mental state was way beyond fucked. Two? I’m not as strong as I thought I was.

And for me to have discovered this, well it was certainly big. You see my family is not the type of family to ask if ones okay and find the solution; we are more of the ‘ask if you’re okay but if you say anything out of the norm then forget it’ — we always have been. Well, at least I think we have. I’m not really close with my family, but I blame that on the stuff going up in my cranium.

So anyways, my head = not in a good state then (or now). Explanation? I don’t know.

In fact, I think it hasn’t been in a 'good state’ for a while. Possibly ever since the summer of '16 (and maybe before…?) which would mean whatever I’ve been manifesting is suddenly making itself known and to be honest the manifestation is quite large. I don’t know what I have to be frank; I don’t know if it’s depression or if it’s something else, in all honesty I feel kind of stupid for just assuming it’s 'depression’. I feel like that nowadays that word is tossed around so much it just feels stupid to say “I’m depressed” with anyone actually taking you seriously. Plus, I never thought I could be depressed or even in such a state of mind.

Which lead me to my epiphanic of uncovering the truth of my mental strength.

It isn’t that strong.

You see, I always thought for a long time in my life that I’m the type of person who doesn’t breakdown, who knows how to build themselves back up again if the going gets tough; the type of human who will never let themselves fall so far down the well of “depression” because I’m just not like that. Full stop.

But I realised in the second month of the year, that I’m none of that; I’m just extremely good at ACTING like I am. Like I am strong, like I can’t breakdown, like I can’t be “depressed”. I realised that I’m so used to being in this mind state that my head has adapted to feeling like this and since I have a slight fear of being mentally unwell; it simply taught me how to ACT like everything’s okay. When in fact…

Everything really isn’t fucking okay.

Now I could type here for ages and ages about my stresses, my worries, my problems etc etc but that would make this so long that it would be the equivalent of 3 Harry Potter books…aaaand since I’m not JKR and I don’t have that type of time; I’ll just summarise, summarise, summarise!

Here we go; so after my big discovery in Feb, it lead to all sorts of things — I started to become more aggressive and more sad; which led to more acting because even if I knew I had a mental health problem it still didn’t mean I wanted to get help or – god forbid ACTUALLY talk about it! So I started to distract myself; distractions, distractions, distractions = my best friend. The more I distracted myself, the more I (believed) had less time to dwell on my (rapidly becoming real) mental health illness. So I took up having some cigarettes from time to time because it made me feel calm and yes I know of the dangers but pocketing a couple of my dads cigarettes wasn’t going to kill me okay? Plus, I always told myself (still do now) to never buy my own pack because that for me would lead to an addiction. Amongst that; I did other things like lash out, do drugs (I DID THIS ONCE BTW) and just things that really weren’t good for me.

So with me doing all this and believing it would prolong my mental health illness awakening; I didn’t realise that instead of PROLONGING my MHI, I just kept feeding it. With all the things I did, they lead to consequences; every time I would smoke, I would feel bad– horrid even, the fear of becoming addicted lead to me feeling shameful (more for the MHI monster to eat), every time I would steal my dad’s wine bottle and drink it for myself, I would feel disappointed that I would stoop so low and thus gave the monster an even bigger meal and every time I tested my parents patience or acted kinda rude to my mates; it fed my monster STRESS because I would stress about what their reactions would be and ugh it was not good.

But here I am typing as if I overcame it all and everything is well again; for your information mi amiga; it ain’t. In fact I still am going through all this and frankly I’m tired. Exhausted. Fatigued. But knowing me and my coping methods; my brilliant acting skills will be back at it again for the next couple of months until I guess I break or something.

This whole text post sounds weird tbh; I don’t like how I’ve written it but it’s honest. And I have more to talk about as well but there just isn’t enough time in the day (or so I say) and besides; it gives me a good reason to post sooner.

However, regardless of all the bad; I have dipped a finger back into my pool of story writing and it’s been a good thing for me to say the least. Another distraction tbh but better than wallowing in my head and assuming the worst.

So yeah, that’s it. That’s all I’ve got. I would say more but the effort is too unreal. So this shall be a goodbye and goodnight.

- A

#been a while #big post #long reads #depression #actually I don't even know if it is #life #deep #young adult #oh dear #literally just using the wrong hashtags rn but oh well #christmas 2016 #2017

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