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dreamescapeswriting · 4 months

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Stray Kids Reaction - You Disappear While Pregnant [Mafia Edition]

⤜Copyright: © DreamEscapesWriting - January 2024

⤜MASTERLIST

TW: mentions of violence, blood and swearing

CHAN:

Things had been feeling weird all day to Chan, you hadn't replied to any of his messages when usually you were the text-back immediately type of person - with him at least. But he tried to put off the uneasy feeling he got when he thought about it all, the two of you were strong as a couple and him worrying you about not replying wasn't the type of man that he was.

"Changbin, make sure Yn has had something to eat today," Chan said as he came through the door of your shared home, expecting to see you curled up on the sofa doing something but you were nowhere to be seen. It was unlike you to not come and greet him so he figured maybe you were tired and had gone to sleep. Maybe even just popped into the garden and hadn't heard him arrive home.

"She's not here," Changbin called from upstairs, panic began to wash over Chan as he thought through his day. You hadn't said anything the night before about going out and you hadn't been responding to him. Within seconds Chan was making his way up the stairs and into your shared bedroom where he found some of your clothes missing and a suitcase was gone too.

"Fuck! Fuck!" Chan screamed making his way to the bathroom and finding a bunch of your overnight supplies were missing too. This wasn't like you, you weren't the type to run away and it wasn't as though the two of you had just had a fight. Everything was going great for you both, god, you were getting married in less than a year now and Chan thought everything was okay.

"I've started a search and Felix is watching the cameras to see where she went. We'll find her." Changbin said as he watched Chan in the bathroom, he was just sitting on the edge of the tub looking down at the floor trying to rack his brain for any reason you might have done this.

"Just find her, tell me when you do but don't make a move." He mumbles, standing up from the side of the tub and knocking over a bin failing to notice the positive pregnancy test that had fallen onto the floor.

It had been eight months since you walked out on Chan and they had been the worst eight months of your life, every day was a struggle and it didn't help that you were pregnant.

"Not now, please not now." You groaned as you held onto your bump, letting out a sharp breath as you tried your best to ignore the pain in your back. God, it felt as though someone was stabbing you repeatedly as you prayed for the train to hurry and arrive where you needed to be.

"Mummy, that woman peed herself." A little girl giggled before the train stopped and you hurried off of it and in the direction of some metal seats on the train station platform. It wasn't time, it was too early for the baby to be coming right this second and you were nowhere near a doctor and you weren't about to give birth to your baby on a train platform.

"Do you need me to call you an ambulance?" The mother of the little girl asked as she made her way over to you, you studied her face for a second before nodding your head. You'd grown a little paranoid since running away from Chan, you knew he was probably doing everything within his power to find you and it wasn't something you wanted to happen. You needed him to stay away from you,

"That won't be necessary." A voice said from the side, you stared over in the direction to see a very panicked-looking Chan making his way toward you. There was sweat dripping down his forehead and he was red in the face, clearly, he'd been running but you had no idea how he'd found you. You weren't in Seoul anymore, you left the second you had the chance to.

"She needs medical attention, she's in labour." The woman argued but you couldn't get words out to tell her to stop you were in far too much pain.

"I'll get her to the hospital," Chan said before Felix and Jeongin escorted the lady and her daughter away and you whimpered a little.

"Channie-" You whimpered out, tears streaming down your cheeks,

"It's nice to know you still like that nickname," His voice came out cold as a group of men began to make their way over to you and you stared at the one in the centre before trying to get up.

"Sit." He ordered gently placing his hand on your shoulder.

"I-I need to go, I can't be near you." You hissed trying to move but Chan was holding your hand, refusing to let you go.

"C-Channie please." You begged your eyes scanning the man at the other end of the platform.

"He said we can't...W-We can't be together." Just like that everything began to click into place for Chan. The only reason you'd left the way you did months ago was because of Hongjoong, he'd told you that it wasn't the right thing for Chan and threatened you to leave without saying anything.

"Who did?" He growled out, your eyes flicking behind him.

"Hongjoong...He said a baby will ruin things." Time suddenly moved slowly as you watched Chan stare over at his advisor and back down at you.

"That's why you ran?" You hated that you couldn't answer him with words and nodded at him.

“Fuck what they think, fuck what anyone thinks. It won't ruin anything, our little baby will only make things better." He promised you as you heard sirens coming.

He was right, of course, he was he always was, but your little girl had only made things better between you and Chan and even made some of his men more loyal to him. They protected you more than ever whenever you were out alone with just you and your little girl and Hongjoong had been demoted so he was no longer able to speak to you - something you'd begged Chan to do instead of killing the man

MINHO:

Everything was too much when you were with Minho and everything pushed you over the edge until there was no coming back from it. For a while, it seemed that all the two of you ever did was fight and scream at one another and you'd finally had enough and just left. No note, you'd choose a week where you knew he was going to be so busy with his own world that he wasn't going to notice you gone. A week gave you enough time to disappear into the world with a new identity and to create a whole new life for yourself.

Or so you'd thought.

It had been even harder to do this for yourself since you happened to be pregnant. Something you had no idea at the time of running away until it was too late. It wasn't until your third month when you found out and there was no way you were going back, even if you didn't think you could raise a baby alone you were still going to do everything within your power to try.

"Are you sure you're okay walking home alone? I can get Angel to walk with you." Your boss stated as he watched you heading for the door of the bar. Angel was one of the bouncers who worked there, someone who looked like he could scare the stripes off a tiger.

"Nah, I'm good. I'll catch the train so there's no point." You shrugged before heading out into the dark of the night and making your way through the alleyway.

For eight months your life had been good, you'd gotten away from Seoul and everyone who ever knew you, you had a new identity you went by and no one could connect you to Minho anymore. You worked your own job, had your own place - sure it wasn't the best but it was still home - and your boss was even letting you bring your kid to work since he knew how badly you needed the money.

"So this is where you've been hiding?" A voice sounded from behind you and you didn't need to see him to know it was Minho and it felt like your whole world was coming down around you.

"How did you find me?" Your voice shook but you didn't turn around to face him just yet, you didn't know if he knew about your pregnancy.

"It wasn't easy. I taught you well."

"I was a fast learner." You mumbled a little, you knew this was going to end with him seeing your bump but you couldn't bring yourself to face him.

"Why did you run off, little bird?" The nickname he had for you made your heart flutter and you hated that he still had that kind of effect on you after all this time. But then again, it didn't matter how much time passed you still found yourself hopelessly in love with him.

"I had my reasons." You pulled your coat tighter around yourself but it did little to hide the bump that you were sporting,

"Another man?" You scoffed a little at him you both knew that there was no way you'd ever do that to him.

"You know I'd never do that."

"True. So what was it?" You heard his steps getting closer to you until he was right behind you and you slowly turned to face him, letting your coat fall down to the sides.

"Pregnant," His voice came out in a whisper and he couldn't believe what he was seeing.

"You need to come back." He stated plainly, his eyes not leaving the bump you had but you were shaking your head at him,

“I don't think I can come back. Too much has happened, too much…water has passed under the bridge. I can't do with the fights anymore Minho, I can't." You choked out before you felt a pain in your back and you bent over a little clutching onto your stomach.

"You're pregnant with my child, you're coming home."

"N-No...I need the hospital," You whimpered looking at Minho who was already on the phone to emergency services.

"I've had Felix and Changbin fix the office into a nursery," Minho told you as he walked into the room to see you feeding your little boy.

"Did you tell them about needing to get more diapers?"

"I've got Chan and Seungmin on that job," He smiled proudly walking over and kissing the top of your head. It was going to take a long time to repair your relationship but a family together was something you were going to build from.

CHANGBIN:

You'd walked out on him, you'd just packed up your shit and walked away from him. You'd seen no point in staying in a relationship with someone who was never even there for most of it, missing birthdays and anniversaries that the two of you were supposed to share. You'd just walked out and tried to never look back, but it was damn near impossible when you were pregnant with his kid. Something he was also never there for, he'd never shown any interest in your baby, never came to appointments or shopping with you.

"Do you think he knows we're here?" You asked your bump as you looked out of the window. You were six months pregnant and constantly on the run which wasn't good, your doctors told you it wasn't good but what were you meant to do when one of the most powerful men in the world was looking for you?

There were sirens outside and you slid back into bed, sighing a little as you tried your best not to focus on what was going on outside. You were in one of the sketchiest neighbourhoods you'd ever seen and you were praying the lock you had on the door would be enough to keep you safe tonight.

“I've already lost her once I'm not going to lose her again,” Your eyes flew open and you saw Changbin standing at the end of your bed but it wasn't the room you'd fallen asleep in. Instead, all of the walls around you were white and there was a loud beeping coming from the side of you

"What the fuck?!" You screamed as you stared at him and then at the other men trying to see if you knew any of them but none of them felt familiar to you.

"Leave," Changbin ordered making a bunch of men you'd never seen before leave the room and you stared at him confused as to how he'd gotten you to a hospital without you waking up once.

"Glad you finally woke up princess," He sat down beside your bed and you stared at him, studying his face before folding your arms over your chest.

"You've resorted to kidnapping now?"

"If it means you'll come home, yes." You roll your eyes at him, of course, he would expect you to just come home after he'd done nothing to fix what he did in the past.

"Why? So you can ignore me and the baby for the rest of our lives?" You hissed bitterly before Changbin's hand took yours and he shook his head at you.

"I would never-"

"You never came to any appointments, you always forgot our anniversaries and my birthday. I was going to put our son through that!" You cut him off angrily and his eyes softened,

"He's a boy?" Tears began to build up in his eyes as he stared at you and you swallowed the lump in your throat.

"Yes...Yes, he's a boy." You mumbled before looking at the screen beside your bed, your heart rate and your son's were both displayed on the screen.

"I'll have them fix the nursery then. I'd been painting it to be pink." He chuckled a little taking his phone out of your pocket and leaving you even more confused than before.

"What?"

"I hadn't been ignoring you...w-well I had but I'd been working on a surprise. I was convinced we were having a girl so I had the nursery made up pink." He admitted before you whimpered a little.

"You did all of that?" You quizzed wondering where this side of him had been the whole time you’d known him

"I did, I would never just ignore you." You sniffled a little as tears began to roll down your face.

"You still kidnapped me." You reminded him as if he could ever forget. He’d spent months tracking you down and it was the best plan he’d ever done.

"With good reason." He added with a sly smirk making you giggle a little at him

"Still a crime,"

"When has that ever bothered me?" He smirked before kissing you gently.

HYUNJIN: EXTRA TRIGGER WARNING! Reader is slapped by a third party!

You slowly lifted your head and looked around your surroundings, nothing had changed in god knows how long you'd been here and you don't know why you held out hope for it to chance in the first place. The men that had taken you told you that the only reason you weren't dead was because of the baby, something that they were going to use as leverage over your husband.

"Morning sunshine, want some food?" One of the men - Lucas as you found out - taunted as he waved around food in front of you before eating it and making lewd sounds about how good it tasted. All of them made you feel physically sick to your stomach, they would taunt you with food or drinks whenever they had it only to give you just enough table scraps to keep you healthy.

"Hyunjin is going to kill you when he finds me." You spat out, looking up at the ceiling and whimpering a little. You were about eight months pregnant which meant at any point any stress could send you into an early labour and you were doing everything within your power to make sure it didn't happen. You weren't going to let a group of men take your daughter away.

"If he finds you, any day now you're going to pop, give us what we want and we'll kill you." You swallowed the lump in your throat because you knew he was right. If Hyunjin hadn't found you by now then there was a slim chance that he wasn't going to find you before you gave birth and it worried you.

You'd always had faith and trust in your husband but you didn't know how many days or even weeks you'd been here, you'd lost count since the men would sedate you to move you from a bed and back to a chair where they left you tied up for hours.

"The doc is coming later to check on the baby," Croft said as he looked at Lucas who simply nodded at him and went back to eating his food in front of you.

The doctor who had come to see you was really nice, great even and you could have sworn you'd seen him before.

"The baby is healthy, both of them have a healthy heartbeat but there is one slight problem." Your heart broke at the idea of a problem with your child.

"Is she okay?!" You panicked earning a slap across the face from Lucas for speaking out when you weren't supposed to and you whimpered looking down at the floor.

"The child is fine, the problem is Lucas." Before Lucas could question what was happening shots rang out throughout the warehouse and multiple men were shot dead on the floor leaving just you, the doctor and Lucas alive with a gun pointed at his head.

"Cut her free," The doctor ordered as a metal shutter began to open, you squinted in the direction and saw Hyunjin making his way through with a giant smile on his face.

"I knew you'd come but what took so fucking long!?" You screamed as you were finally free from the chair and slowly stood up.

"The little rat is too good at covering his tracks," Hyunjin grumbled as he held your face in his hands turning it from side to side as if he were checking you over. Once he saw that you were fine he let you go and turned his focus on the man that had taken you.

"You know," You started as you stared around the warehouse where about 60 of Hyunjin's men were waiting with their guns trained on him,

“There’s an unspoken rule where if this many people are trying to kill you, then you should be dead already.” You grumbled before Hyunjin wrapped his arm around you and nodded at his men, giving them the all clear for what they needed to do.

JISUNG:

What on earth made you think that you could do this? You couldn't do this and you were nowhere near ready like you thought you were. You swallowed the lump in your throat as you laid your head back on the edge of the bathtub, the water filled with blood and whatever else was coming out of you at this point and you cried to yourself.

"Fucking arsehole!" You screamed gripping the edges of the grungy tub that you were laid in, screaming out in agony as you tried to do the breathing techniques you'd been reading about.

Everyone had told you how beautiful birth was going to be but none of them told you about the pain you were going to feel, like how you felt as though someone was ripping you apart from your vagina. No drugs to help you, no one to tell you if you were dilated.

You were alone and in some sketchy neighbourhood and a dirty apartment with no one around you. No friends, no husband, completely alone because everyone had forgotten about you and left you behind.

"Why did you have to come now?! You couldn't have waited a few more weeks?!" You yelled through the tears, ignoring the sirens that were outside of the apartment building that you were currently residing inside. It was every day that sirens went flying through and you'd tried to drown them out but now it was impossible, you prayed that they were somehow for you. That Jisung had finally remembered you and came to get you but no hope.

Hongjoong had told you that Jisung would come and get you within a month of you hiding out in the "safe home" but it didn't feel much of a safe home when you were in the worst neighbour imaginable and felt at threat every second of the day. You did some deep breathing as you heard someone pounding on the door, probably telling you to be quiet but you were about to give birth in a tub there was no being quiet.

"Fuck...y-you," You whispered suddenly feeling as though your eyes were too heavy to keep open and you looked down at the water, it had to be time to push surely. There was no way you could keep going through all of this pain.

"Yn?!" The door to the bathroom burst open and Jisung was staring at you, wide-eyed as he took in the scene around him

"What are you-" Before he could finish asking you let out a loud scream as another contraction hit you and he was on his knees on the floor beside the tub.

"I've got you." He whispered as men rushed into the scene, looking away from your naked body.

“I feel like everyone just forgot I existed," You whispered out to Jisung, looking at him a little unsure if any of this was even real at his point.

"I killed Hongjoong," He mumbled wiping sweat off your forehead,

"Baby he made it look like you ran away, left me a note...I-I had no idea where you were." The pain from the birth and heartache all crashed into one as sobs began to leave your throat.

Weeks of hospital treatment later you were home once again but on bed rest, Jisung's orders not the doctor's. He was refusing to let you move for as long as humanly possible and did everything he could for you.

"I'm okay, I can run my own bath." You told Jisung as you watched him running a bubble bath for you while your baby slept soundly in the bedroom.

"I want to do this for you." He whispered as you held him from being. He was doing everything he could to make up for you being alone all this time, the guilt was overwhelming for him but you hadn't blamed him for a second.

FELIX:

Your head was killing you when you woke up and you tried to lift your hand to your head but it was met with resistance and the sound of metal clanging on the floor. You weren't home that was for sure and if you were you were going to kick your husband's butt for some silly prank he was pulling.

"What the fuck?" You looked at your wrists and saw a metal cuff around them and down at your ankles it was the same. Your eyes shot around the room and you saw a camera in the corner facing you and it had a blinking red light, meaning it was recording or live.

"Who the fuck are you?! What do you want?!" You did your best to sound as confident as possible but it was impossible since you had no idea who had taken you in the first place.

"Someone who wants revenge." A voice sounded before a door opened and an elderly man walked in with the help of a cane,

"Your husband took something...someone from me and I plan to do the same." He stepped closer to you and you were able to see a huge scar down the left side of his face and you instantly knew who he was. Jan was one of the men Felix had to take down in order for him to become who he is today, one of the biggest mafia leaders in the country.

"He didn't kill your daughter, your own men did." You spat out knowing the story of his daughter already. Felix had tried to save her, getting her out of the house before he burnt it down but Jan's own men took her back into the building, shooting her to make it look like Felix had done it.

"You're a silly brainwashed little girl, your husband took what was mine and now I will do the same." He reached out to touch your bump and you slapped his hand away, you were almost ready to pop which made you more scared for your daughter's life.

"He'll kill you." You grumbled rubbing your bump as you stared at the man who simply smirked at you.

"Actually, he'll do everything he can to find you and slip up. I'll be waiting for him with his daughter in my hands and his wife dead beside me." You felt sick as he walked out of the room, slamming and bolting it shut before you leaned your head back on the wall.

"You stay in there as long as possible, you don't come early." You mumbled to your stomach, whimpering at the thought of this all happening.

As soon as Felix found out that you were missing he knew who was responsible, it really didn't take a genius to figure it out either and Jan hadn't been the sneakiest of people when it came to plans.

"I want men at every entrance, dead on sight," Felix ordered into the earpiece as he sneakily made his way toward the basement window. Men had been watching the building for a week now trying to find weak points in the security system and there was one. There were no guards, no cameras. It was just Jan on his own in a house that seemed to be abandoned,

"Lix?" You whispered when you saw him at the window, a smirk on his lips as he began to break it open, sliding through it with ease.

"How-" Before you could ask the door was opened and men came through, your men who were all smiling at you happy to see you were okay.

"Where's Jan?" You asked as you made your way through the home and up the stairs, a car was failing to start out in the drive and you all began to make your way in the direction. The frail-looking man looked panicked as he tried to start the engine of a very run-down-looking car.

“Running doesn't matter i’ll hunt you down if you do," Felix said loud enough for him to hear but Jan continued to try the engine again and again until clouds of dark smoke left the hood before he was pulled from the car and dragged toward a van.

"Are you okay? Did he hurt you?" You shook your head, for the most part, he'd left you alone and just fed you and let you use the bathroom but Felix was still going to make him pay for taking you.

SEUNGMIN:

The old lady you'd made friends with over the last month was holding your hand as she walked you around the small spare room in her home. This wasn't supposed to be happening right now, you were supposed to be long gone from Seoul before you gave birth but it seemed as though your son was going to come earlier than you wanted him to.

"We should get you to a hospital," She told you as you gripped onto her hand and shook your head, hosptials meant that Seungmin could track you down and you'd been doing everything you could to stay off his radar and you were going to keep it that way.

"He'll find me, he can't find me." You pleaded, she knew your story and why you'd run away but for the whole month she'd known you she had been trying to convince you to go back to Seungmin and have him be there with you.

"He should be here for the birth of his son." She scolded and you rolled your eyes at her. No one seemed to understand why you'd walked away from him, the two of you were fighting more than usual. You'd heard him say he wasn't even sure he wanted a child and so you didn't give him a choice, you ran.

"He said he wasn't sure he wanted him, I took the choice away." You groaned before bending over with your palms flat on the bed, screaming out in agony as a contraction hit you.

"I'm sure he was just nervous and he never meant it," She pleaded with you before the door opened and someone walked inside. Your head slowly looked behind you and you groaned seeing your husband standing there with a doctor by his side.

"You called him?!" You screamed trying to push her hands off you as Seungmin walked over to you but the lady continued to hold onto you, rubbing your lower back.

"Of course she did, you really think I'd let you get that easy?!"

"You said you weren't sure you wanted him. I took the choice away from you, leave." You hissed out but he shook his head at you,

“Aren't you tired? Can we stop this and give our hearts a rest?” You hated that he sounded so poetic when all you wanted to do was hate him,

"She's almost ready," The old lady mumbled as you shook your head there was no way you wanted to do this here, you wanted drugs to numb the pain anything,

"You need to push," Seungmin told you as he held onto your hand, your eyes meeting his as you let out a whimper,

"I'm not ready, we're not ready!" You yelled and he chuckled a little kissing your cheek.

"No one is ever ready baby." He held onto your hand and you whined out knowing that it was time to push.

As soon as Seungmin was holding your son in his hands he was smiling at you,

"I-I'm sorry I ever doubted this," He told you as he held onto his son's tiny hand, watching him sleep peacefully in his arms as you laid your head on Seungmin's shoulder tiredly.

"If you ever say it again, we will be gone and you will never find us," You warned him as he nodded at you, kissing the top of your head as he promised that it would never happen again.

JEONGIN:

You had no idea what you were thinking when you'd disappeared months ago, there was no way that you were ever going to do this alone. Maybe if it had just been you on your own everything would have been fine but after running away you found out that you were pregnant. The only reason you'd run was because you were scared of the life he led, you weren't sure it was something you could see yourself in but ever since you discovered you were pregnant you knew you needed to come back.

Your child deserved a father in their life, even if it meant co-parenting instead of getting back together with him but you still loved Jeongin. You didn't think you could ever stop loving him for that matter.

"Yn?" Jisung whispered as you waited inside one of the buildings that Jeongin owned, you knew sooner or later one of his men would see you and tell Jisung or even bring you to him.

"Hey, is Jeongin around?" You weren't showing yet, no one would know that you were pregnant by looking at you and you were thankful for that.

"In his office, I'll take you up." Jisung took your arm gently and began to take you up. It had been a weird few months with their boss who lashed out at everyone who was close to him and refused to speak to anyone unless he needed to.

"What?!" Jeongin snapped as Jisung knocked on the door and walked inside. As soon as Jeongin turned around you felt guilt prickling your skin, he looked rough and that was putting it lightly.

He hadn't shaven in months, he was sporting a full beard which you assumed was to hide all of the bags under his eyes.

"Yn?" His voice broke but he quickly cleared his throat as he stared at you, not moving from his chair. He was too scared that if he did you'd suddenly disappear again.

"Hi." You mumbled a little as Jisung silently left the room, shutting the door behind him and leaving you alone with the man you loved.

"What can I do for you?" He asked, putting on his business voice as you slowly stepped toward the desk and dropped the ultrasound photos down onto the desk.

"I don't want money...I want you in the kid's life, even if you don't want me." You told him as you watched him slowly pick up the photos, you waited for him to question if it was even his but those questions never came.

"Move in, we'll create a nursery...we'll have everything ready."

"You'll forgive me? Just like that?" You were stunned at how he was just ready to throw everything into the past and come back to you. You expected some kind of resistance from him, or that he'd want a paternity test.

"You're the mother of my child...the love of my life, you could stab me and I would forgive you." You scoffed a little at him, of course, he would say something like that.

"That's toxic." You smirked at him before he shook his head at you.

"Shut up." He grumbled before shaking his head at you and looking back at the photos with tears in his eyes.

"You need to shave, I won't come back until the beard is gone." You told him as he moved to hold you in his arms.

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fromgoy2joy · 4 months

Text

I have been… biting my tongue from saying things.

Partially because I’m not “really Jewish” (on the way to it via conversion), and because I didn’t want this blog to be political.

But I realize I want this page to be a safe space. If anyone takes issue with what I’m about to say, I don’t want them on this page.

I joined the college jewish community very shortly after 10/7 and was immediately welcomed in. There was no separation between me and the girl who had gone to orthodox shul all her life and was the head of the state youth group. I was told explicitly “you are one of us. And together, we are mourning. We have lost our people and so have you.”

Still I felt no authority to speak on things as insidious as antisemitism until recently. But how many times do you have to experience an antisemitic incident until you get to stand up?

Six. The answer is six.

Since explicitly aligning myself with Jewishness, I have lost friends who told me I have “dual loyalties” in so many words. I’ve been ostracized in events because we were singled out . I’ve been followed back to my dorm room from events by people hurling genocide accusations at me- white girls wearing keffiyahs who don't know anything about the Nakba when I try to connect with them about how awful it was.

My face was used in a local “fight jew hate” campaign” where I’m in a group of people with clearly middle eastern descent. But what circulated around my campus was my blonde hair and blue eyes, with people using laughing emojis.

“This is who we’re supposed to be defending!? Bitch please! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣”

(Which is perfectly ironic because they singled out the person who wasn't ethnically Jewish and focused on her. )

Campus security and the disciplinary office knows me quite well from all the reports I've filed whether for me or other people.

I leave campus for breaks. Even though I’m returning to my highly Catholic conservative family, I breathe a sigh of relief. I don't have to look over my shoulder constantly or check myself in the surroundings I'm in. I already feel the dread about returning in January.

What hurts is the blindness- the lack of nuance- that is being given. Every single Jewish person at my school is not a self described zionist, other than that they acknowledge Jewish indignity to the land, and that there was a reason for the creation of Israel- not even justification in the current state or the matter it came about.

But they- and we- shouldn't have to prove ourselves. We shouldn't be debating if we should fundraise for Gazans (we are) in case someone accuses us of "lying about our intentions" or if we'd be pointed out as "the good jews!" They shouldn't have to have a tab open on their computer for Israeli passports, even though they desperately don't want to leave the United States. I shouldn't have to wonder whenever I'm at a synagogue "If I get killed here in a terrorist attack before being immersed in the mikvah, will I get a Catholic or Jewish funeral?"

But that never mattered. Our voices never did. Unless the antisemitism came from a high school dropout neo-nazi with a shaved head and swastika jacket, it's never going to matter.

I will never forget- even as I advocate for Palestinians, call for a ceasefire, and donate. Or any other cause where I'll be marching besides these activists I can never call well meaning.

I could go on and on about it. But I won't be able to write it out in this post.

All I know is when the counsel of rabbis ask me if I'm ready to be apart of an unpopular group, I'm going to have to fight myself from laughing at the question

#jumblr #jewish #antisemitism #tw antisemtism #jewblr #jewish convert #jewish culture #fromgoy2joy thoughts

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stefans-brock · 4 months

Text

colby brock

heartbreak anniversary.

summary: it had been months after colby's girlfriend had left him, and he still hadn't gotten over her. she left him heartbroken. but after she reached out to him for his birthday, the two reconnected.

a/n: i'd highly recommended that you listen to 'heartbreak anniversary' whilst reading this! 🫶🏽

it was colby's birthday, though many would look forward to their birthday - colby didn't. he was dreading it, the thought of his birthday brought back many memories - memories he didn't want to reminisce.

it had turned midnight on the second january, and he was laid on his bed, looking up, staring at the ceiling - feeling bad for himself. he let out a sigh before looking over to his phone, which sat on the bedside table.

a flashback of previous years occurs in his head - it had become a tradition that y/n would always text colby at midnight exactly on the day it turns his birthday. she'd wish him the happiest of birthdays, continue with a 'i love you' and end it with 'i'll see you later'

"fuck, stop it" colby cursed, scolding himself. he always reminded himself never to think about the past, but how could he stop when that was the happiest he'd ever been. after parting ways with y/n, colby became deprived of love and loving. he would sometimes let himself become selfish and reminisce his time with y/n because that's all that he had, he knew he shouldn't, but he couldn't help himself.

he grabbed the plushie, which lay beside him and settled it on his chest. he closed his eyes as he breathed in the scent from the plushie. it was a pink and blue dinosaur plushie, which went by the name 'bubbles'. the scene of colby winning it for y/n played in his head, the corner of his lips curved slightly at the memory. he remembered the smile and laughs from y/n as he concentrated on the claw machine. she squealed when colby handed her the dinosaur. she informed colby that the dinosaur reminded her of bubblegum, and so colby came up with the name 'bubbles'.

during the break-up, y/n left bubbles at colby's. it hurt colby every day to see the plushie, but it reminded him of his soulmate - so he couldn't ever bring himself to throw it out or try hide it in his closet - because in reality, he needed it. it helped him bear the pain and hurt.

a knock on the door brought colby back to reality. he opened his eyes and glanced over to the door, which was now slightly open, with sam's head peeking in. colby gave him a small smile before nodding his head beside him.

sam walked in, closing the door behind him and walked up over to colby. colby placed the plushie down beside him and sat up on the bed.

"happy birthday, brother" sam cheered, pulling colby up off the bed. colby let out a quiet laugh whilst he reciprocated the hug.

sam pulled back, looking at colby's face. he'd know the boy ever since they were young boys, so though colby didn't or rather couldn't express his feeling, sam already knew what he was feeling.

"you all good, man?" sam asked cautiously. colby nodded eagerly, "y-yeah, all good here" colby lied. "have you heard from her?" sam finally asks.

colby lets out a deep breath before dropping down on his bed, crossing his legs whilst hiding his face in his hands. he shakes his head. "i'm sorry, man," he says, taking a seat besides colby.

"i just-" colby tries to say but gets cut off by the lump in his throat, he swallows it down before trying again- "i just wonder if she thinks of me the same way i think of her" colby admits.

"i think she does, colby. what you two had was -" sam assures him, placing his hand on his back. "it was something special, man" he shakes his head.

sam tried his best to reassure colby and comfort him and colby appreciated it, but inside, he was still feeling the same.

"we should probably head to sleep," colby announces, making sam nod his head. "see you in the morning, man," he smiles before giving colby one more hug. he then leaves colby's bedroom, leaving colby all alone again with his thoughts.

colby shuffled down on his bed, laying down on the mattress. he turned to his side, facing the bedside table. he bit down on his bottom lip as he noticed the face in the picture frame, staring at him.

he reached his hand out to the picture frame and placed it facing down. he shook his head, trying to escape the memories that were entering his head again. how could he try to get over y/n or move on from her when his bedroom felt haunted by her. she was everywhere but nowhere.

just as colby's eyes became heavy, he heard his phone begin to ring. he groaned, reaching his hand out to the bedside table, patting his hand around on it until he grasped his phone.

he answered the call, not even bothering to look at the caller id. "hello" his voice came across tired and hoarse as he spoke into the phone.

"colby" the familiar voice spoke, quiet like a whisper. "y/n" colby cleared his throat as he sat up on his bed. "hi" colby spoke again. he heard her take a deep breath before speaking, "happy birthday, colby."

"sorry, i know i'm a few minutes late than normal," she says. colby let out out a little laugh, "you still called." colby shakes his head in disbelief. this was the last thing he's expected to happen. "colby?" she asks, colby humming in response.

"are you still in vegas?" she stutters over her words. "yeah, still with sam and kat" colby reminds her. "i remember," she says, colby swears he could feel her smile through the phone.

the two stayed quiet for a moment. it wasn't an awkward silence but rather a comforting silence. "uhm, okay, so i should get going," she mumbles, "happy birthday, again," she finishes. "y/n?" colby pipes up quickly before the call ends. "yeah?" she replies. "will i see you later on today?" he asks, hoping she'd say her standard answer of 'yes, of course you will', but instead, silence filled the air again.

she takes a deep breath in, "i don't know colby, i don't think you will," she says. "y/n," colby sighed. "i'm sorry colby, but i have to go," and with that, she ends the call.

"fuck" colby exclaims, throwing his phone across his bed. he throws his hands up to his head whilst muttering out profanities.

memories intruded his mind, mocking and reminding him of what he had lost.

he remembered the way her lips tasted, how they'd move against his, the way his hands fit perfectly on her waist. the way she would always tap her necklace in counts of three whenever she got nervous.

he hated it - he hated how he remembered everything, every little detail. he hated how much he loved her - or rather how much he still loves her. he hates how much she impacts him even now, how every thought of his is consumed by her.

with her stuck in his mind, colby eventually fell asleep. unconsciously, he had reached over beside him and held out for the pink and blue plushie from before.

the sound of happy birthday playing through a phone, whilst sam and katrina sang along, was heard by colby when he woke up due to the disturbance.

colby groaned as he pulled the covers above his head, "it's your birthday, dude!" katrina squealed, "happy birthday, man!" sam exclaimed. he made his way to stand on colby's bed and then began jumping on the mattress.

katrina rolled her eyes at colby before pulling the covers down, "get up!" she exclaims. "too tired!" colby groans as he nuzzles his face into his pillow. "colby, i swear to god if you don't get up right now -" katrina starts.

"geez, i'm up" colby yawned, sitting up. he rubbed his eyes open before looking up at sam, who was still jumping up and down on the bed. "you need help, brother," colby chuckled, shaking his head.

sam ignored him and jumped down, off the bed, now standing next to katrina. "happy birthday colbs!" katrina smiled, opening her arms for colby.

colby stayed sat on his bed but lent up to give her a hug, "thanks guys" colby smiled. "so what's on the agenda today, birthday boy?" katrina asks, taking a seat on the foot of the bed.

"lets just make it a chill one this year" colby informs both of them, "nonsense, it's your twenty seventh" katrina pipes up. "we gotta go wild" she finishes.

colby chewed his inner cheek before glancing over at sam, who was looking at katrina with widened eyes whilst shaking his head slightly - giving her a 'don't push him' look.

colby looked back at katrina and nodded, "you're right, it's my twenty seventh. let's go crazy!" colby cheered, making katrina smile, and sam looking concerned.

"right, so, breakfast?" sam asks, "wanna go out?" he finishes, raising an eyebrow to colby. "yeah, lets do it, man," colby nods along. "okay, meet us down in twenty," sam states, colby nodding along in agreement.

katrina stood up from the bed and walked behind sam as the two made their way out of colby's bedroom. "wait, kat!" colby shouts after her.

katrina turns around, humming in response, "what's up?" she asks. sam had also stopped in his tracks, now looking at colby. "can i talk to you?" colby asks, moving his eyes over to katrina.

sam gave colby a small nod and smiled before walking out, closing the bedroom door after him.

katrina takes a seat in the same place she sat a minute ago. "has she said anything about me to you? colby asks after taking in a deep breath.

"colby -" katrina shakes her head, "please, kat" colby pleads. she lets out a sigh, "she misses you" katrina admits, "she feels so guilty, colbs" katrina continues.

guilty? why was she feeling guilty?

colby's eyebrows furrowed. colby's friends and family knew the two broke up, but only a few knew the real reason behind why.

colby had never publicised his relationship, so as far as the fans knew, colby didn't have a girlfriend - or the slight few that had seen the two in public before, assumed they were still together. when it came to letting others know, they decided to say it was a mutual decision, and the two would go on to stay friends.

the only people who knew the truth? y/n, colby, kat, and sam.

the truth was y/n left but not because she gave up on what she had with colby. there was an accumulation of reasons, really. she was scared that her relationship with colby was going too well and she was expecting it to crumble down any second of their relationship, making her anxious a lot of the time, or thinking about things intensely - too intensely, over analysing situations and conversations. another reason was a lack of self-worth. she had an idea in her head that she wasn't good enough for colby and that he deserved more than her.

"besides feeling guilty, she's actually doing well, colby." katrina informs him, snapping his out of his trance. "she's been really working on herself a lot these past few months," katrina continues on. "i know she misses you, colby," katrina pouts, fiddling with her rings on her fingers. "a lot," she says after a short pause.

"what do i do now though kat, i need her," colby lets himself become vulnerable in front of the girl he calls his sister. "come here," katrina pats the mattress beside her, signalling colby to shuffle over, and he does so.

kat gives colby a hug, "you just need to wait colbs. you'll have her sooner than you think" she informs him.

colby pulls back from the hug and nods hesitantly. "can i tell you something?" colby sighs, katrina nods in response.

"i can't stop thinking about her," colby admits, "everywhere i look, i see her. right when i wake up, up until the moment my eyes shut. and even still, she appears in my dreams like she's a mythical being. " colby shakes his head, realising he's said too much.

"soon, okay. i promise, " katrina frowns before standing up.

"today's about you colbs," katrina plasters a sad smile on her lips before she turns to walk towards the door. "remember, things happen when you least expect them too," colby watched as she walked out of the bedroom, shutting the door behind her.

once colby was left alone in his room, he dramatically dropped his back down against the mattress. he let his hand run through his hair, tugging slightly due to the feeling of frustration.

after recollecting his thoughts - or in better words pushing down his thoughts - he rose up on his feet and made his way to his closet.

he picked out his favourite xplr tracksuit and laid it on his bed before making his way into his bathroom.

he took a shower, brushed his teeth, and then stood in front of the mirror to style his hair. after getting himself semi-ready, he made his way back into his bedroom, with a towel wrapped around his lower half, and got changed into the tracksuit he had previously picked out.

he finished off by putting on his jewellery - such as his chunky, silver rings and his layered, cross necklace. grabbing his phone, wallet, and keys, he stuffed them in his pockets before running his way downstairs.

sam and katrina were already standing at the front door, the couple now out of their pyjamas and in their day clothes. "ready?" sam asks, looking up from his phone, katrina doing the same. colby nods in response. the three now making their way out of the house, colby locked up whilst katrina and sam walked up to sam's car. "you can have the front, birthday boy," katrina chuckles, opening the back door of the car. colby gives her a playful smile before taking a seat in the front passenger seat.

"so, where are we going?" colby asks the two, turning to put his seatbelt on. "there's a new brunch place on the strip" katrina shrugs, "yeah, lets do that. that sounds good" colby nods.

sam turns his key in the car, starting the ignition, and then begins the drive to the strip.

the drive only lasted a few minutes short of half an hour before arriving at the café.

"are we underdressed?" colby announces, opening up the café door for both katrina and sam to walk in. "we aren't" katrina whispers, her finger moving back and forth between her and sam, "but you might be" she giggles, shaking her head.

colby looks down at his xplr tracksuit and shrugged before catching up with the couple, who had now found a table.

the three sat in a booth, colby and sam on one side whilst katrina sat alone - though opposite them.

"i'm starving," sam huffs as he flicks through the menu. "same, man," colby joins in.

the three eventually pick out their meals and put in their order.

"are you sure it isn't too early for a cherry cola?" sam asks, looking over at colby, whose gulping down said drink. "it's never too early for a cherry cola" colby grins before placing the glass down on the table. sam chuckled whilst shaking his head. he then moved his focus on his girlfriend, who was talking about a new song of hers.

colby tried listening to her speak, but the glass he had just drank from - left an imprint in his mind. "cherry cola," he barely whispers. he runs the pad of his thumb against his bottom lip.

cherry like her lips, her favourite chapstick was cherry flavoured.

colby bit down on his bottom lip as he remembered the taste of her lips. the memory of his last kiss with her, taunting his mind. he remembered everything, from the way her lips moved against his, the way they tasted, to the way she always tried to tease colby by running her tongue across his bottom lip.

"colbs?" katrina's voice took colby out of his trance, "so what'd you think?" katrina asks. colby raises his eyebrows at her, "sorry, i didn't hear." colby shook his head. "it's okay, never mind," she smiles before turning her attention to sam.

after that encounter, colby stayed focused on the conversations. not only because he felt bad for not paying attention but because he couldn't allow himself to reminisce his past - it still hurt him. it reminded him of what he now didn't have: her.

shortly after, their meals came out, and three scarfed down their food - it was evident that they were all hungry.

once finished, sam paid the bill, and three made their way back to their house.

"i forgot i needed to go to target!" katrina exclaimed as sam began larking the car in the driveway. "seriously?" sam tuts. "i need to get candles for the cake, sam!" katrina huffs. "i don't need candles on my cake" colby shrugs.

"you're getting candles, colby," katrina says, shooting a glare out colby, who just puts his hand up in defence. katrina then looked in the rear view mirror to make eye contact with sam.

"take me," she pouts, "babe, i can't. i have to finish up editing. " sam shakes his head. the two then look over at colby, "will you take me?" katrina pleads. "oh" colby scratches the back of his neck awkwardly. "uhm, yeah, sure" he agrees. "thank you, thank you, thank you!" she sings as she gets out the backseat. she then opens up the passenger side door, looking down at colby, who's still sat there.

"oh right, yeah" colby chuckles. he watches sam exit the drivers seat before he leaps over the center console, now taking a seat in front of the wheel. katrina now taking a seat on the passenger side.

sam said his 'see you laters' to his best friend and girlfriend before making his way inside, whilst the other two, made their way to target.

"one direction?" katrina squeals, "you bet!"

it had been two hours since colby and katrina arrived at target. the first half an hour was spent at the starbucks in target, and it took katrina twenty minutes to decide what drink she wanted. during the time katrina spent deciding, colby stood and watched her - in utter confusion. how could someone take so long when ordering a drink.

after that debacle, the two went to go get the candles. "colbs, can you get a cart?" katrina asks. "we're just getting candles. why do we need a cart? colby asks. "we just do," she smiles. colby shook his head as he walked over to the cart bay.

as he pulled out a cart and wheeled it over towards katrina, he realised he'd messed up by agreeing to take her - it was going to be a long trip.

and a long trip it was. it had been two hours in, and katrina was still looking around as if she had just walked in.

"kat, i'm tired," colby whined as he pushed the cart. "nearly done," she says. she's been saying that for the past hour now.

after the three hours total in target, they two finally made it out there alive.

"i'm never being your chauffeur again," colby huffs as he unloads the bags from the cart to the backseats of the car. katrina chuckled as she helped him with the bags.

it was nearly six in the evening when the two arrived back home.

"i can't believe you bought this much shit," colby shook his head as he grabbed two bags per hand, beginning to turn towards the door. "wait colbs!" katrina exclaims, making colby hum in response, "don't leave me alone. it's dark out here, " she says, colby just nodded, letting her go in front of him.

the two walked through the house in pitch darkness, "kat, put the lights on!" colby says as he drops the bags on the kitchen island. "doing it!" she says back. colby heard rustling beside him, which he thought came from katrina trying to find the lights, but when the lights flicked on and colby looked beside him - he dropped his jaw in utter shock.

"happy birthday, colby!" and "suprise" - both were heard as people jumped up from the floor.

"what the fuck" colby chuckled as he began getting embraced by friends. as he was getting pulled in every corner, by friends who were wishing him a happy birthday, he was looking out for someone in particular.

he was searching for those familiar siren eyes, the ones that would always lure him in, the ones that were hypnotising.

"she isn't here," sam whispered into colby's ear from behind. colby gave him a subtle nod before smiling at the friend who had pulled him in for a hug.

colby went on throughout the night saying his thank you's before moving on to spend time with his close friends.

"cheers to you, brother." sam cheered as he clinked his champagne glass against colby's. colby let out a chuckle before the two swallowed down their champagne. colby had been sipping on his one glass of champagne throughout the night, whereas sam had a few too many glasses of both champagne and vodka. - to put it lightly, sam was hammered. colby had made a mental note to himself, 'to watch over sam, throughout the night'. but when he saw the blonde beginning to climb the kitchen island, he shook his head and let out a sigh before turning to katrina.

"i'm going out for some air. can you try to make sure he's still alive for when i come back in, " katrina lets out a giggle, "will do, " she smiles before turning towards sam's direction.

colby strolled his way towards the front door, slightly pushing past the bodies that filled the kitchen and hallway.

once outside, he took a seat on porch steps. he scanned his surroundings before stuffing his hand in his front pocket, pulling out a white box.

he opened the white box and pulled out a cigarette. he settled the single cigarette in between his index and middle finger. his fingers fiddling with it as he began contemplating whether to light it or not.

"so, you smoke now?"

the familiar voice startles colby, and still his head shoots up, and his eyes fall into those familiar siren eyes.

he jumps up from the ground, brushing his clothes. it was only then he realised that he was still wearing a tracksuit at his own party. he shook the thought out of his head and fixated on the girl who stood in front of him.

her legs were crossed as she stood, her pink dress fitting up to her mid thigh. her hair fallen, settling just above her waist. her arms crossed over her chest, and a purse that losely rested on her shoulder.

without answering her, he stuffs the cigarette back into the box and places it in his pocket. he then reaches his hand out to her, and she takes it instantly. colby quickly acknowledged the warmth and electricity that ran through his body as her hands touched his.

though he pushed the acknowledgement aside and guided her into the house and up the stairs. colby evidently unbothered by the fact that he had just gained a few stares and whispers.

"colby" she breathed out hesitantly as he led her to his room. he shut the door behind her and then made his way to his closet. she watched as he now approached her with an oversized leather jacket.

"it's cold" he says, wrapping his jacket around her arms, letting it drape down. "thanks" she whispers.

the two stood merely a few inches away from each other. colby looking down at her whilst she looked up at colby.

their silence speaking louder than words, colby reached for her hand and intertwined her fingers with his.

"happy birthday, colby." she smiles. colby returned a smile before saying a thank you.

colby watched as she turned her head, scanning the room that she knew all so familiarly.

"it's the same" she let a small giggle as she let her hand fall from colby's. she began walking around the room, her hands following behind her as they traced the wall and any other objects that came in the way.

she stopped at the bedside table, flipping over the picture frame that colby had put down, early hours in the morning.

"you still have this?" she asked rhetorically, though colby still nodded.

"everything is as you left it," colby muttered as he took a seat on the foot of his bed. he was referring to her clothes still being in his closet, her toothbrush still sitting on the bathroom counter, bubbles - the plushie, and the picture frame.

she bit her inner cheek as she put down the picture frame as she had found it - facing down.

she then followed suit to colby and sat on the foot of his bed. but this time colby stood up and walked to the bedside table. he picked the picture frame up and settled it back on the table, propping it up.

"still got bubbles," colby points over to the dinosaur that lay against the head rest. a smile rose on her lips as she turned her head back.

"bubbles!" she giggled, leaning over to grasp the dinosaur. colby watched as she hugged the plushie, breathing in its scent. "it smells like you" she states, making colby chuckle lowly. "it's smells like you," colby counters, shaking his head.

she also shaked her head, setting bubbles beside her as she watched colby approach her. he stood in front of her, reaching down for her hand. he gently pulls her up, her chest now against his whilst their lips are inches away from touching.

her hands flew up to settle around his nape whilst his arms rested around her back.

the two were now breathing heavy, their chest heaving against each other's. "colby" she muttered breathless. "shh" colby whispered as he lowered his forehead against hers.

she brought one of her hands up to cup his jaw, her fingers tracing his jawline. "i'm sorry, colby." she shakes her head as she closes her eyes. "for everything," she stated, opening her eyes.

"i miss you." she moved her hand higher, now cupping his cheek.

"it wasn't your fault" colby finally says. "i know you felt like you had to leave, but you didn't," colbys begins. "but honestly, you never really left" he continues. she raised her eyebrows at colby, "there wasn't a day since you left that i hadn't thought about you. everywhere in this house, in my room, you were always there" colby finishes. he lowers his face down closer to hers.

"colby" she breathed out, colby humming in response. "kiss me" she pleaded, "please" colby plastered a smile across his lips before letting his lips fall onto those familiar plumped ones.

he ran his hand up to the back of her neck for leverage. she let her hands snake to his nape, her fingers playing with that back of colby's hair.

colby was the first to pull away, though his lips remained close to hers. "cherry" he smiled to himself as he ran his thumb along her bottom lip.

a creak was heard from the door, colby's head shot around, staring at the door, which was parted. he saw sam and katrina peeking from the parted door.

"you were being too loud!" katrina whispered to sam but failed as colby heard her. colby shook his head at the couple as they walked into colby's bedroom, guilty expressions on their face.

"hey y/n, long time no see!" sam exclaimed, going in for a hug. she gave him a wave before returning sam's hug.

"are you guys okay?" katrina asks.

colby turns to look at y/n, "never better, right?" colby smiled. she hummed, "everything's perfect." she smiled, leaning up on her tiptoes to place a kiss on colby's lips.

both sam and katrina cheered and squealed from the sight of their best friends finally reuniting.

"do you guys mind?" colby says, pulling away, glaring at sam and katrina. "oh, yeah, sure," they laugh awkwardly before leaving, closing the door behind them.

"colby!" she exclaimed with a giggle, "what!" colby exclaims, "they were creeping me out, they were staring" he raised his eyebrows.

she playfully hit his chest before tiptoeing again, colby lowered his lips on hers.

"this is the best birthday present you could've given me, thank you"

a/n- if you have any requests, please just ask! my requests are open! 🫶🏽

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russellsppttemplates · 9 days

Text

Christmas in Spain (Carlos Sainz)

First term is over so you go back home to spend Christmas with your family

Note: english is not my first language. Dad!driver always gets me fluffy (and let's pretend it's Christmas season for a bit - it was a bit tricky considering it's sunny and warm outside 😅)

Thank you so much to everyone who likes and reblogs, your feedback is appreciated 🤍 and I'm taking requests so if you have any ideas or concepts you want to share, feel free to do so as I'll try to get to them the best I can!

my masterlist

Tag list: @myloverjk-blog @hiireadstuff @c-losur3

"I hope you have fun holidays!", you waved to the kids as they got their backpacks and ran out the door, excited for the Christmas break.

Grades would be sent over e-mail and on the school platform and a parent-teacher meeting would happen in January, so for now all you had to do was tidy the classroom a bit so you wouldn't come back to a big mess.

"Do you need help?", one of the cleaning staff asked you as they pushed the cart along the corridor.

"No, I'm fine, thank you though! The classroom is not looking so bad - Mark thought it was funny to do the drawings I asked them to on the table, but I had him clean all of that out and I think we've finally won over that bug that was going around because the bin barely has any tissues!", you cheered like you had just won a championship.

"Just in time for them to go home and spend time with all the extended family and friends and catch some other bug, right?", the older lady joked and you laughed along.

"I tidied this the best I could so this one is hopefully quick for you to clean - thank you", you smiled as you grabbed your bags, making sure nothing important was left behind before leaving the room, "I hope your holidays are nice too, I'll see you in January!".

You got in the car and drove home, hoping to find a small chaos since Carlos said he would get everything ready for you to fly out to spend the holiday time with his family in Spain, volunteering to pick up the kids from school so he could get them ready to travel too.

"Mis amores, I'm home!", you gave them a quick shout before putting your things away in the office, having already packed them in separate bags so you could leave the backpack with the things you didn't need in the office and take only the things you needed already in the backpack you would fly with.

"Mama!", Clara was the first to greet you at the door, letting you pull her up so you could hug her, "I'm all dressed for the flight!", she smiled, twirling around in the tracksuit. Since the flight would arrive late, it would be best to have the kids dressed in comfortable clothes given that they would probably fall asleep and in the event that they would arrive at Carlos' parents already asleep, it wouldn't be too bad if they slept in them.

"I can see that, is papa getting the boys ready?", you kissed her cheek and walked up with her to the boys' bedroom.

Mateo was sitting in the play area, his fingers holding finger puppets while Carlos put Benjamín's sweater on, making you sit down with him.

"Why don't we show mama just how handsome you two look?", your husband said as he allowed him to go to the floor and join his brother in the cuddle you had him on.

"Mama! We're matching!", Benjamín said, leaving a splotchy kiss on your cheek and showing you the sweatshirt and sweatpants set all three kids had. When you spotted the Christmas themed Disney sets, you had to get them. While the boys had the dark blue version, Clara had the pine green one.

"You look really cute, guys! Are they comfy?", you wondered.

"Yes, feels nice, it's not itchy", Mateo offered and his siblings nodded before you pulled yourself up to your feet, Carlos helping you and landing you on his chest.

"Hello, beautiful", he greeted, kissing your lips after what felt like an eternity as he watched you and your kids. He would happily stare at the four of you forever, but a kiss was needed.

"Hey, amor", you spoke, "seems like you did just fine getting these three monkeys ready to go", you smiled.

"Don't be fooled by it - the boys were not happy they had to have a bath since they weren't going to bed yet, so there were some negotiations and some tantrums", Carlos chuckled.

"Mama, did you know we're flying tonight?", Clara asked, big brown eyes looking up at you as she pulled on your pants' leg.

"Yes, I did! We're going to see abuela and abuelo for Christmas!", you agreed, "which means I also have to go and put something comfortable on, pack what's left and then we can head out!", you clapped your hands.

Changing into an appropriate outfit, you put the last minute things in your luggage before heading down, Carlos already buckling the kids in their car seats while you fit the test of the carry-ons on the car boot.

Driving to the airport was a nice challenge since you wanted to keep the kids awake until you boarded the plane to make things easier and not change their sleep routine too much, meaning that you blasted every Bluey album you had, singing along loudly with the three children.

"Why can't I push the trolley?", Mateo asked as Carlos pushed the trolley with all the bags.

"Because it's to heavy for you, buddy - papa will do it and you hold my hands", you assured, stretching them out once your backpack was secured on, "Clara, stay close to papa, okay?", you warned.

It certainly wasn't the first time you were travelling all together - even though you didn't travel to races as much as you did when it was just you, the kids would often be in most of the European races and a few other ones outside of the continent too -, but your stress levels were still the usual.

"Relax, amor, I packed everything we needed, and if by chance something is missing, either my parents or my sisters will have it or we can go to the store and get it", Carlos tranquilized as you sat in the lounge, the kids happily eating some dry cereal from the bowl.

"I know, I think the school stress is still here somehow even though I've left everything ready and done with - I only have those reports to finish on monday", you sighed as your husband rubbed your shoulders.

"You don't have to worry, okay?", he assured, pulling you to rest on his chest until you got the flight call to board.

The flight itself was fine, the kids staying awake without making too much of a mess and entertaining themselves with their sticker books. As soon as you got to the car, though, everyone was out like a light before you left the airport parking zone.

"Welcome back!", Reyes was the first to greet you as Carlos' stopped the car

Putting his finger in front of lips so they wouldn't be too loud, Carlos spoke softly, "they fell asleep right away, if one of you could help us with them, please", he said as his father took Clara in his arms while you and your husband took each of the boys.

"I'll bring your luggage inside, dears", your moment in-law assured as you walked upstairs to the bedroom where the kids would sleep in.

Tucking the kids with some coos and shushes, you were able to come back to the kitchen and be met with some snacky bits Reyes prepared, "have something to eat and drink, I'm sure it will do you good", she smiled as you sat around the table, catching up for a bit before you retired to your respective bedrooms for the night.

"This year I decided I wanted to bake our own roscón", Reyes announced as she got the ingredients out of the cupboard, not missing the wide-eyed looks and scoff from her children and her husband, "why is it no one has faith in me to pull it off?", she reasoned.

"Mama - it's just, you've never done it", Ana reasoned as her siblings nodded.

"For you to be able to say you can do something, you have to do something you've never done before", the matriarch offered.

"I believe you can do it, abuela", Clara added, "mama always says that when we want to do something, we have to put our minds to it and work as much as we can for it!".

"See? At least someone thinks I can do it - you can be my sous-chef, cariño", she smiled at her granddaughter, "do you boys want to join us?".

"Abuelo said he has a new toy car that we can play with him and papa outside", Benjamín hugged her legs and Mateo followed and replied with "I know you'll do well, abuela".

"Off you go then - means I also get your mama all to myself because not only does she have a magic finger for baking - and I do need all the help I can get - and I won't have all of you stealing her from me", she giggled, tapping their noses and letting them go outside.

Reyes loved all her children the same, and her daughters were no exception to her love. When she found out her only son was enamoured by someone, she wanted to meet the young woman who had taken her boy's heart. Since then, you always felt included in their family activities and like you were her third daughter.

"How has school been?", she asked as you followed the recipe on the propped up iPad, measuring the ingredients and setting them apart.

"My little ones are finally able to do some independent work, they're confident enough to do it and that gives me more time to prepare different things to do with them - I've been really enjoying teaching this class", you smiled, helping Clara with the eggs to make sure no shells fell in the bowl.

"That's nice to hear - you know, Carlos used to worry a lot about you running yourself too much and overworking, especially now with three kids, so I can't hide the fact that I'm happy that it's becoming easier on you", Reyes stated.

"There are hard days - they will always be even if I work all day or no time at all -, but we've got a routine down with them, Carlos is spending as much time home as he can and so far, there hasn't so been much to worry about", you offered.

After kneading everyhting and waiting for the three hours the recipe recalled, you began decorating it.

"Abuela, does this one look good next to this one?", Clara wondered as she displayed the candied fruits on the dough.

"Yes, amor, it looks very delicious - we can only hope it will taste delicious as well!", Reyes kissed her cheek and mixed the sugar with water before sprinkling the mixture.

"Are we ready to start writing our letters?", Carlos Sr clapped his hands before joining the kids at the table, Mateo already holding the glue.

"Yes, we're ready, abuelo! Can you help me with my spelling, please?", Clara asked.

The boys were too young to write, so they chose to draw instead and your daughter still required some help.

"Tres Reyes Magos, my name is Clara Sainz, and this year I have been a good girl. I always did as I was told and I did really well in school too - Do you think that's good, abuelo?", your daughter wondered, wanting to know her grandfather's opinion on the start of her letter.

"That's good, cariño - now, you have to write to them what you'd like to get for a present", your father in-law praised, turning his attention back to the boys' letters, "have you two decided what you're going to ask for?".

"Yes! I want this game here", Mateo said as he showed his drawing.

"I really hope they'll bring me this book", Benjamín showed his best attempt of the cover his grandfather had seen you wrap the night before, smiling at the prospect.

"Let's hope they'll bring you those, then", the oldest Sainz in the room said.

"Are we going to watch the Cabalgata tomorrow?", Mateo asked, "I saw some photos from last year but I don't remember much from them", he admitted.

"Yes, if all goes well - we usually go every year, I don't see why we can't go and watch it again", Carlos Sr smiled.

#carlos sainz imagine #carlos sainz x reader #carlos sainz fic #carlos sainz fluff #carlos sainz fanfic #f1 imagine #f1 fic #f1 x reader #f1 fanfic #f1 fluff

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adascore · 30 days

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OUT OF THE BLUE | J. FLEMING

pairings: jessie fleming x chelsea!reader

warnings: angst. swearing. crying. jessie’s transfer.

author’s note: inspired by @pixiesfz (fic: moving on) and @jflemings (fic: inevitable), I definitely recommend checking out their versions of the transfer!

masterlist

•••••••

January, 2024

''Yeah, that does sound great. I'll, uh, think about it and call you tomorrow… Okay, thanks… Bye bye.'' Jessie hung up the phone, her mind swirling with conflicting emotions. She sighed as she glanced back into the living room, her girlfriend sitting on their couch, blissfully unaware of anything.

Y/N wasn't entirely oblivious to Jessie's agent researching new clubs. It had been an ongoing discussion for a while now, fueled by Jessie's frustration with her dwindling game time at Chelsea.

Jessie quietly sat back down on the couch, not wanting to disturb her partner's tv-show.

''Everything okay?'' The Canadian turned her head, finding Y/N's eyes on her.

She nodded, biting her lips. ''Yeah, good… just my agent.'' She replied, trying to mask the turmoil in her voice.

''Any news?'' Y/N asked.

Bless her heart, Jessie thought. Despite not being the biggest fan of no longer getting to be teammates, Y/N had been very supportive of her girlfriend's search, believing her talent was indeed being wasted at Chelsea.

''Uh, nothing new,'' the midfielder lied, ''she's still in talks with a few clubs.''

''Oh, okay.'' The forward smiled, redirecting her focus back to the series she was watching.

Jessie didn't want to lie, she really didn't. However, telling the love of your life that you received a great offer from an American club and that you're really considering it, isn't an easy thing to do. The Canadian tried telling herself she should only tell Y/N when it's official, but Jessie knew from the moment her agent informed her of the option, that this was the right direction for her to go.

Her game time would improve compared to Chelsea's, and Janine and Christine would become her club teammates- she'd be stupid not to accept. But Portland was far from London, and Portland was far away from Y/N, her true home.

She promised herself she would tell her when the time was right, when the offer from the Thorns was official and her future was certain.

''I think she might stay until the end of the season, and then see what her options are.'' Y/N responded to Erin, after the Scot asked about Jessie's future.

Erin nodded. ''Nice, we can give her a proper sendoff then.''

''I'd say a party, but I don't think she would want to be the center of attention.'' Millie chimed in, thinking about how they could celebrate the younger woman's time at Chelsea.

''She'd look more like a tomato than she already does.'' Erin laughed, imagining her fellow midfielder's reaction.

''But it's good that we'll have at least this last season with her. The last match is gonna be emotional, Emma leaving, Jessie leaving…'' Millie said once the laughter had died down.

Y/N nodded her head. ''Yeah, but I just want to see her happy, you know? She loves the team, but, you know, with the game time and everything.''

Both women nodded, understanding Jessie's reasons for wanting to play somewhere else.

''Do you know where she's maybe going?'' Millie asked, curiously.

The younger woman shrugged her shoulders. ''She has plenty of options,'' Y/N grinned proudly, ''I think she's staying in Europe, though- Champions League and all.''

''She's gonna become a rival.'' Erin teased, rubbing her hands together in feigned mischief.

Y/N couldn't help but smile at the thought, but the underlying sadness of Jessie's departure lingered in the back of her mind.

''I also see her staying close by, at least near you.'' Millie lightly nudged her teammate's shoulder, sending a wink.

Y/N grinned back, but there was a hint of dejection in her eyes as she glanced at her friends "She's gotta do what's best for her," she said softly, her gaze drifting to the floor, "that's the most important thing.” She murmured.

As Y/N's thoughts lingered on Jessie's impending departure, she was abruptly pulled back to the present by the sound of someone's voice.

''Hey, you're ready to go?'' Jessie asked, her arrival at their table breaking the somber silence that had settled over them.

Amazing timing, Fleming, Y/N thought as her girlfriend approached their table.

Y/N's heart skipped a beat at the sight of Jessie, her dejected mood momentarily forgotten as she met her girlfriend's gaze. "Yeah." She replied, her eyes lighting up and a smile gracing her lips.

Her friends exchanged knowing glances, their amusement evident as they observed the subtle shift in Y/N's demeanor in the presence of her girlfriend.

Y/N got up from her chair. ''See you tomorrow, beautiful ladies.'' She bid her friends goodbye.

''Tomorrow, love birds.'' ''See ya!''

Jessie silently grabbed her partner's bag from the floor, and the pair walked together to the parking lot.

''They're so adorable it makes me sick.'' Erin muttered.

Millie laughed at her teammate. ''I think you might be allergic.''

As they drove out of the Chelsea training complex, a heavy silence enveloped the couple, weighing down the air in the car. Silences weren't necessarily unusual for them, but there was something about this one that had Y/N feeling confused and worried at the same time.

Glancing sideways at Jessie, Y/N noticed the furrow in her brow, the tension etched into the lines of her face. It was clear that something was bothering her, something she was struggling to articulate.

"Hey, Jess," the striker began hesitantly, breaking the uneasy silence that hung between them, "is everything okay?”

Jessie's grip tightened on the steering wheel, her gaze fixed on the road ahead as she wrestled with her thoughts. ''Yeah, just a bit tired.'' She responded, her voice strained.

Her answer did nothing to soothe her. There was a distance in the Canadian's eyes, a hesitancy in her voice that spoke volumes. "You can talk to me, you know." Y/N said, and she reached out to Jessie's hand.

For a moment, Jessie tensed up at the display of affection. Her breath was caught in her throat as she struggled with what to tell her partner. ''Can we talk about this when we're home? I don't want to have this conversation while I'm driving.'' She asked, momentarily making eye contact with her.

Y/N nodded, though the unease still gnawed at her. "Of course," she replied gently, withdrawing her hand but keeping her gaze fixed on Jessie, "we can talk about it when we get home."

The remainder of the drive passed in an uncomfortable conversation about their thoughts on the training that day.

As they finally pulled into their driveway, Y/N's heart pounded in her chest, the anticipation of the impending conversation sending a wave of anxiety crashing over her. She followed Jessie inside, the heavy silence hanging between them like a dense fog.

Once inside, Y/N took a seat on the couch. Her eyes fixed on the midfielder like a hawk as Jessie paced through the room.

Taking a a few deep breaths to ease herself, Jessie finally broke the silence that had enveloped them. "I... I received an offer." She confessed, her voice barely above a whisper.

Y/N perked up at the revelation. ''An offer?'' She repeated. ''That's great, no?'' Her voice tinged with uncertainty.

But as she watched her girlfriend unconsciously shake her head, she knew there was more to the story than Jessie was letting on.

The Canadian hesitated, her gaze shifting to the floor as she struggled to find the right words. "From the Portland Thorns," she finally admitted, her voice barely audible, "they want me to play for them.”

Y/N's heart sank at the news, a knot forming in the pit of her stomach. ''Portland?'' She muttered. ''In the U.S.?''

Jessie silently nodded. ''Yeah, the NWSL.'' She confirmed.

Her heart sank even further at the confirmation, the reality of the situation settling in like a heavy weight on her chest. ''Wow… that's, uh, that's amazing- with Janine and Christine, that's really nice, babe.'' She tried to muster a smile, but it felt hollow on her lips.

Despite her attempt to be supportive, the weight of Jessie's decision bore down on Y/N like a heavy burden. The thought of being separated by thousands of miles was something out of a nightmare.

But as she looked at Jessie, her heart ached at the thought of holding her back from pursuing her dreams. She knew that she had to be strong, to support her partner no matter what path she chose.

''Thank you.'' Jessie was unsure of how to proceed, it was clear that her girlfriend wasn't expecting a transfer to the other side of the world. "I... I know this isn't easy," she continued, her voice wavering slightly. "But I have to do what's best for my career.”

Y/N reached out, gently squeezing Jessie's hand. "I know," she replied softly, ''and this is gonna be really good for you.''

''So… you're not upset?''

She shook her head, a forced smile tugging at the corners of her lips. ''Of course not. I know you're going to do amazing there, and I'm happy that they are seeing your talent. It's a great club, Jess. And if it means you'll be happier... then I'm all for it.”

Tears pricked at the corners of Jessie's eyes as she pulled Y/N into a tight embrace. "I love you." She whispered, her voice choked with emotion.

"I love you too," Y/N replied, returning the embrace, ''I think you forgot for a moment that I'm, like, your biggest fan.'' She chuckled, tears forming in her own eyes.

Jessie laughed now as well. "How could I forget?" She echoed, her eyes sparkling with affection as she looked at Y/N. "You're the best.”

As the evening wore on, the weight of Jessie's decision lingered in the air, casting a somber mood over the apartment. Despite the reassurances they had exchanged, the reality of the situation still hung heavy on their hearts.

A few days later, the time came for Jessie to face her teammates and share the news of her new club. The staff had gathered the team into the meeting room with the excuse they needed to go over some past matches.

''Before we get into some of the matches, there is someone here who has some news for us,'' Emma began, ''Jessie?'' The coach signaled for the Canadian to take her spot at the front of the room.

The midfielder quietly walked towards Emma. ''Hey, everyone,” she awkwardly greeted the room, "I, uh... I have something I need to tell you.” A hush fell over the room as all eyes turned to Jessie.

Y/N's eyes became fixed on the floor, not feeling ready to hear this for a second time.

''I've received an offer from the Portland Thorns,” she said, still a bit on edge, ''and… I've decided to accept it. So this is actually my, uh, last day as a Blue.''

"I... I know this might come as a surprise," Jessie continued, her voice faltering. "you guys are an amazing group, and I'm so lucky to have shared the pitch with such incredible players. All of you will always have a special place in my heart, and, yeah, just thank you for everything.'' She finished her small speech, becoming emotional.

She received applause from the squad and staff in the room. Emma was the first to give her a hug. A flicker of irritation flashed through Y/N at the thought of their coach's role in Jessie's decision to leave, but she pushed it aside, knowing that now was not the time.

All the players got up from their seats to say their own ‘thank you's' or give their own hugs to Jessie. However, the young striker remained seated, finding herself unable to follow her teammates.

With a heavy heart, Y/N quietly rose from her seat, her footsteps barely audible as she made her way towards the door.

She felt a hand on her shoulder as she almost went for the door handle. ''You okay?''

Y/N was met with Sam as she turned around, the Australian's face expressing concern over her teammate's exit without having said anything to her girlfriend.

''Yeah, just need the bathroom.'' She replied, quickly.

Sam nodded and let her go, but she was not convinced. The No. 20 shared a look with her captain who had also watched the young woman's escape.

Millie swiftly ruffled the Canadian's hair, before walking over to Sam. ''What was that?''

''I don't know, said she needed the bathroom, but she went before the meeting.'' The experienced striker explained, a furrow in her eyebrows.

''I'll talk to her.'' Turning back to Sam, she offered a reassuring smile before making her way towards the door.

She caught up with Y/N in the hallway, and gently placed a hand on her shoulder, causing her to startle slightly. "Hey," the Brit said delicately, her voice filled with warmth and understanding. "Mind if we chat for a moment?”

Y/N hesitated, her gaze fixed on the floor as she struggled to meet her older teammate's eyes. "Sure." she replied quietly.

She led the younger one to a more secluded area, not wanting anyone to eavesdrop on their more personal moment. Millie's face was full of concern as she turned to her. ''Are you okay? What happened there? Didn't Jessie tell you already?''

''She did, she did… a few days ago.'' She answered, her voice still quiet and full of emotion.

''Then, what's wrong? Why'd you leave?''

Y/N pulled her attention from the ground to Millie's eyes. ''It's just… that, like, it seemed to have only hit me now that she's actually going, you know? She's gonna go to Portland, while I'm staying here in fucking London.''

Millie's expression softened with understanding as she listened to Y/N's words, her heart aching for her younger teammate. ''I get it,'' she put her arm around her, ''it's tough knowing that she'll be so far away, especially when you're used to having her here with you every day.''

The striker nodded, a tear slipping down her cheek as she struggled to contain her emotions. "Yeah," she murmured, ''I'm…'' she trailed off.

''You're what, sweetheart?''

''I'm scared.'' Her voice was small, if her teammate wasn't standing so close to her, she probably would have missed it.

''Of what?'' The captain frowned.

''The distance, I don't think I can handle it, Millie.''

Millie's heart ached at the vulnerability in Y/N's voice, her own eyes brimming with tears as she wrapped her younger friend in a warm embrace. "I understand," she murmured, offering her a comforting squeeze, "it's okay to be scared. It's a big change. For the both of you.''

Y/N nodded, her tears flowing freely now as she struggled to articulate the depth of her fears. "I... I'm scared of losing her," she admitted softly, ''that she'll forget me while she's there.''

"You won't lose her," she reassured her, her voice filled with sincerity. "Jessie loves you, Y/N. And distance won't change that.”

Y/N sniffled, a small hiccup escaping her as she leaned into Millie's embrace, finding solace in her comforting words. "But what if... what if she meets someone else?" She whispered, her voice tinged with fear.

Millie's grip tightened, her heart breaking at the thought of her friend's pain. "Jessie loves you," she repeated firmly. "And nothing, and I really mean that, nothing will bloody change that.''

''Thanks, Mills.'' Y/N said, her head resting on her shoulder.

''You're welcome, darling. I'm always here for you. And Erin, and Sam, and Guro, Niamh, Z, all of us.'' She reassured her, wanting her to know that they'll stand by her while she goes through this difficult time.

Y/N let out a shaky breath, feeling a sense of relief wash over her at Millie's words. "Thank you," she whispered, her voice filled with gratitude. "I... I really needed to hear that.”

''Anytime, bubs,'' the defender pecked the top of her head, ''I do think you need to tell Jessie this. It's important for her to know how you feel about all this.''

The younger one nodded, taking a moment to compose herself before pulling away from Millie. "You're right," she agreed, her voice a bit steadier now, ''I'll talk to her about it.''

Millie gave her a reassuring smile, her eyes filled with encouragement. ''Great, she'll understand. It's Jessie, remember?'' She chuckled, trying to get a grin out of her friend.

She was successful as Y/N managed to crack a smile. ''Yeah, it's Jessie,'' she straightened her posture as if ready for battle, ''thanks again, Mills. I really appreciate it.''

The defender nodded, the smile on her own face widening. ''You're very welcome, sweetheart.'' She gave Y/N a small pat on the back.

The next evening, they sat together in their dimly lit living room, trying to watch a movie. Y/N glanced over at Jessie, whose eyes were focused on the television.

"Jessie," she began, her voice barely above a whisper, ''can I, uh, talk to you about something?''

The Canadian's brows furrowed in concern as she turned towards her partner. ''Of course.''

Y/N took a deep breath. ''First, I am so happy for you that you're going somewhere where they are appreciating your talent, and that you'll be closer to your family and your siblings...'' she began, her words slow and measured. She paused, struggling to meet Jessie's gaze. ''I just don't think that I, uh, am gonna be able to handle the distance.''

Jessie's stomach twisted with unease as she absorbed her words. In the days since it had become official that she would be moving to Portland, they hadn't really discussed how their relationship would proceed. Each of them had spoken about it with their friends, but they both seemed hesitant to broach the topic with each other, perhaps afraid of the uncertainty it might bring.

''I want to, Jessie, I really want to try- I just want you to know how I feel, it's been bothering me.''

The midfielder found it hard to respond as she observed her girlfriend who looked like she was about to burst out in tears. Tears welled up in Jessie's eyes as she reached out to gently cup Y/N's face in her hands, forcing her to meet her gaze. "I understand," she whispered, her voice strained, "and I appreciate you being honest with me.”

Y/N's own eyes started to water. She leaned into Jessie's touch, her heart breaking at the thought of losing her. ''I love you, J Flem.''

''I love you.'' Jessie reciprocated as she took her partner into her arms, wanting her as close as possible.

''I don't know if I can handle being so far apart, not seeing you or speaking to you every day. International break is already a killer for me, and it's difficult to just go back-and-forth between Portland and London.'' The striker whispered into Jessie's neck, not able to say it any louder.

The Canadian nodded, completely understanding her perspective. ''I know,'' she whispered back, 'I never wanted to put you in this position."

For a moment, they simply held each other in silence, the weight of their unspoken fears hanging heavy in the air. But as the minutes ticked by, the reality of their situation became increasingly clear.

''I don't want to hold you back.'' Y/N said, her voice muffled against the fabric of Jessie's shirt.

''You're not holding me back at all.'' Jessie immediately retorted, ruffling her hair.

Y/N weakly chuckled. ''It feels like I am.''

''Please don't think that, babe.''

They were both aware of what was coming, they were simply wasting time as if that would somehow work and they wouldn't have to leave each other.

''I remember when I first joined Chelsea, and I was watching some of you guys' matches, and thinking you were so intimidating,'' Jessie broke the silence.

''but then you were actually one of the first people to say hi to me, and you just looked so different than on the pitch. You were smiling, and trying your best to make me feel welcome.'' She laughed, an affectionate smile playing on her lips.

Y/N grinned as well, while wiping some loose tears away. ''I just remember thinking you looking super awkward.'' She dryly responded.

Jessie gave her a light push. ''Hey!''

''I also thought you were very cute… with your flushed cheeks.'' She quickly added.

The midfielder ironically blushed at the admission.

It became quiet between the two of them again, reminiscing their early days as teammates at Chelsea.

''We'll find our way back to one another, I'm sure of it.'' Jessie nodded.

Y/n felt a lump in her throat at Jessie's words. ''We're still so young, you never know what can happen.''

''And I know what's going to happen. You and I, together- whenever, wherever that may be.'' She reassured her, her voice filled with sincerity.

Y/N nodded, her chest tightening with the weight of their impending separation. "I love you, Jessie." She told her, the pair locking eyes.

"I love you too," Jessie replied, her voice catching in her throat, "more than anything."

jessie fleming requests are always welcome!

#jessie fleming x reader #woso x reader #woso fanfics #woso imagine #woso fic #chelsea women x reader

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otdiaftg · 3 months

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The King's Men - Chapter Seven

Day: Wednesday, January 17th Time: 8:30 PM EST

"And he says it isn't a righteous streak," Andrew mused, more to himself than to Neil. "If it was righteousness I'd ask you to give up drinking and smoking, too," Neil said. "I'm only asking for this one thing. It doesn't have any effect on you anyway and it's an unnecessary risk. You don't need a third addiction." "I don't need anything," Andrew reminded him, right on cue. "If you don't need it, it'll be easy to give it up," Neil said. "Right?" Andrew thought it over a minute, then flicked his cigarette at Neil. It singed the material where it bounced off his shirt. Neil ground it out under his shoe when it hit the asphalt. The cool look he flicked Andrew was wasted; Andrew's gaze had already drifted past him in search of something more interesting. "I'm going to take your temper tantrum as a yes," Neil said. "I'll bring the money by your room tonight." "Will you?" Andrew slid his stare back to Neil's face. "Rather, can you? Aaron doesn't want you in the room anymore, Nicky says. Something about you inviting yourself to fights that aren't your concern?" He waggled his hand in a so-so kind of gesture. "This phone tag nonsense has left the message a little unclear. Perhaps you'll explain to my face why you're suddenly so interested in my brother's life." "I'm not," Neil said. "Without the lies," Andrew added. "I'm not," Neil said again. "I can't stand him, but we're out of time. I told you last October we can't make it to finals if we're a fractured mess. You two are holding us back. I had to start with one of you. Since everyone bets on Aaron and Katelyn, I thought he'd fight you for her." "Wouldn't that be an interesting change of pace," Andrew said. "See also: a waste of energy and effort. He might try, but he won't win." "You have to let him go." "Oh," Andrew said, as if this was news to him. "Do I?" "You'll lose him if you don't," Neil said. "He'll keep pushing Katelyn away if you tell him to, but he'll resent you for it. He'll count down the days until graduation and when it comes you'll never see him again. You're not stupid. I know you can see it. Let him go now if you ever want him to come back." "Who asked you?" "You didn't have to. I'm volunteering my opinion." "Don't," Andrew advised him. "Children should be seen and not heard." "Don't dismiss me for lying to you then ignore me when I tell the truth." "This is not truth," Andrew said. "Truth is irrefutable and untainted by bias. Sunrise, Abram, death: these are truths. You cannot judge a problem with your obsession goggles on and call it truth. You aren't fooling either of us." "If you ask for half the truth, you'll only get half the truth," Neil said. "It's your fault if you don't like the answers I give you, not mine. But as long as we're talking about obsession and Aaron's life, what are you going to do about his trial? She's going to be here for it, isn't she? Cass, I mean," Neil said, though he was sure Andrew knew who he was talking about. "You're going to have to face her." "Seen and not heard," Andrew reminded him. He sounded bored, but Neil knew a warning when heard one. Neil let it slide and went back inside.

Art used with permission by ouijacine. Thank you @ouijacine.

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feralforfrank · 11 days

Text

part two-ish? of this.

SIMON "GHOST" RILEY X FEM!READER

cw idk cursing? NON-DESCRIPTIVE READER.

a/n like, two people asked for more, so ..... voilà.

masterlist | taglist

once you start dating simon, you gradually ease up on the mean nicknames and glaring. your stares aren't as mean as they were when he spilt that beer all over you, or when he took you to what was the possible worst date of your life just to piss you off (don't worry, he made up later).

he doesn't fully escape your wrath, though. he forgot to pick you up from the grocery store in the middle of january, when you had specifically asked him to keep an eye on his phone and wait for your call. he ended up falling asleep while half-watching a documentary and petting your cat.

you had to walk home, which wasn't that bad, considering you thankfully weren't carrying many bags, but you were still super angry with him. although, most of the anger dissipated when you saw him (barely fitting) dosed off on your tiny couch (how would you ever stay mad, he looked adorable), you did hit him in the head violently to wake him up. then purposely gave him the cold shoulder when he tried helping you organise the groceries, accidentally knocking the milk carton's sharp edges on his exposed bicep.

despite the rare occasions when he frustrates you, you're softer with him now. still have the same fire in your eyes and bitchy tone in your voice, but it's hardly ever directed at him.

soap is usually the target of your never-ending wrath. when he teases his lieutenant about how pussy-whipped he is, he gets a snarky comment back which makes kyle cough to hide his chuckles.

"oi, lass, sometimes i think ye donae like me a'all!"

"that's right, i don't!" you'll reply with such a serious tone, johnny has to pause, mouth hanging open.

you'll blankly stare at him for a few seconds and his gaze will flicker from your face to simon's, who's also staring at him unemotionallly, while his fingers play with the end of your dress. he doesn't speak for a few seconds, trying to figure out if you're really serious or not. kyle does his best not to burst out laughing, hiding his smile by drinking, and price just shakes his head and turns his attention to the tv.

the corner of your lip cracks a smile, and soap visibly relaxes. "ye canae do tha' t'me, bonnie. ye hurt me feelings!" he clutches his chest dramatically.

"then you better stop poking fun at my boyfriend, sergeant. or i'll beat you up."

soap raises his hands in surrender, and you feel said boyfriend, burying his nose in your hair and kissing the top of your head.

"my lovely savior."

what simon really liked about you, from your very first meeting, was your ability to yell at anyone (if they wronged you in a way) with no fear. just absolute rage.

there have been times men tried hitting on you, and with simon gone from your side for whatever reason, you have to put a stop to their advances alone.

some are understanding when you say you already have a boyfriend, others leave when you glare at them and call them dickheads for disrespecting a woman's choice, but then there are the annoying dumbfucks who just can't, for the life of them, take the hint.

"did your date ditch you?" you roll your eyes at his smug smirk. "i would never leave such a sexy lady alone, by the way."

you've had enough of the guy, for he hasn't stopped bothering you ever since simon stepped out of line to answer a work-related call. he's behind you, leaning in front to talk in your ear. you haven't even bothered turning around.

the place is crowded and you can't see simon from where you're standing. the lady, three people in front of you, is taking ages to order her movie snacks, and you really are starting to regret dragging him to the movies. you could've pirated it or something.

your leg is nervously tapping on the floor, a tight grip over simon's wallet, and pursed lips hiding gritted teeth. you're sure you look like happiness personified.

"you can sit with me and my friends, if you'd like. i'm sure they wouldn't mind a hot piece of arse such as yourself—" smack.

your slap is uncharacteristically loud and resonates in the room. heads turn, and the guy is frozen in his place, hand touching his burning cheek.

"would you shut the fuck up and take a fucking hint already?!" you try to control your voice, but the words come out as a shout. "for the last time, i have a fucking boyfriend. leave. me. alone."

before he can say anything, a familiar scent enters your nostrils. simon's hand wraps loosely around your shoulder. "what's goin' on 'ere?"

"this fucking pig won't leave me alone!" you take a step closer to the guy threateningly, but simon is quick to pull you back.

"i was just trying to make conversation, you bitch!" smack.

it all happens so fast, simon is barely able to grab you before you claw the guy's eyes out. his friends pull him outside as he throws curses at you, but you just give him the middle finger and allow simon to drag you up to the popcorn section.

"i leave you alone for one minute, lovie..." simon whispers to you.

you shrug. "he brought it upon himself. i was nice by not answering, but he called me a hot piece of arse! and i just had it up to here with him! unbelievable!"

"well, you are hot, and you have a nice arse." simon receives an elbow to the ribs.

"fuck off."

"c'mon, pretty girl, before you terrorise the rest of the cinema."

he finds your scrunched eybrows, flushed cheeks, and fiery gaze extremely hot. your height (compared to him) makes you storming out when angry, almost comical. adorable.

um....this got out of hand....idk.....

#simon riley #simon riley x reader #simon riley x you #simon riley fluff #simon ghost riley #simon ghost riley x reader #simon ghost riley x you #ghost cod #ghost cod x reader #ghost x reader #ghost mw2 #fluff #established relationship #frank writes

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stupidlittlespirit · 6 months

Text

First Kiss

Rating: SFW, fluff Type: Drabble Tags: first kisses, alcohol, making out, no use of pronouns for reader, reader is wearing a skirt, slight Serizawa x reader, vague mention of vomit (nothing overtly descriptive), jealousy Word count: 4363 My other works: here on tumblr and here on Ao3! Reigen gets drunk, jealous and kissed.

(This has been in my drafts since January and I figured you guys might like it :) )

Staff parties are just the worst.

Well, they're the best, but for all the wrong reasons: They’re noisy and messy, and you get an excuse to spend time with handsome men under the guise of simply being colleagues.

You're exceptionally drunk, perched beside your team in a rowdy bar as you watch them misbehave.

Serizawa is flushed a happy pink, tipsy but still managing to keep himself together. Dimple, possessing his favoured security guard for the night, is plastered against Serizawa's side. Reigen, however, is much worse for wear. He's slumped over the table as Serizawa is speaking, eyes half-lidded and likely not paying attention.

Wait. Serizawa is speaking.

"-maybe that's why? I guess I just never tried..." He’s saying, a little forlorn but soft as always.

You shake your head and shuffle up in your seat, leaning over to nudge Reigen. "What's he talking about?" You hiss, hoping you don't make it obvious.

Reigen shrugs sloppily, his shoulder bumping yours as he lurches. "Dunno."

"Dimple said Mob was talking about first kisses this morning," Says Serizawa, shifting in his seat to address you directly. He doesn’t look upset at your poor listening skills, more amused.

Clearly you weren't being subtle enough.

"Then he asked if I'd had one, and I haven't. I’d like to, though.” He shrugs. “Maybe one day.”

Now that you're caught up, you gape at Serizawa.

"So you've never been kissed?" You ask, leaning forward. "Like, at all?"

He shakes his head but doesn't look bothered at all. It's more like he's stating a fact, but it makes you feel a little bad for him.

Reigen laughs uproariously. "Never been kissed?!" He claps Serizawa on his shoulder from across the table. "That's gotta suck!"

"I guess you can relate." Dimple smirks from behind the lip of his beer bottle.

Reigen almost inhales his cocktail through his nose and you have to beat his back to stop him from choking to death.

"N-not at all!" He cries, desperately waving his hands around. "I've kissed plenty of people in my life-"

"I'll kiss you." You cut in, making Reigen choke again. “If you want one, that is.”

Serizawa turns even pinker and he looks over at you shyly. "R-right now?" He squeaks. “Here?”

"Sure." You shrug.

It feels bad knowing Serizawa has never experienced the joys of kissing someone, and you want to offer the chance in a comfortable setting.

Serizawa looks excited and adorably bashful when he nods in agreement.

You’re a little surprised he’s bold enough to take you up on the offer, but you suppose with a few drinks in him, he’s braver than he might usually be in a social setting.

Untangling yourself from your seat, you swap sides at the table to sit next to him, bumping Dimple with your hip until he acquiesces and moves to your seat.

Meanwhile, Reigen makes his grievances known.

"This is so unprofessional-" He starts, brows furrowing.

"Yeah? What do you know about being a professional?" Dimple snips back, watching you and Serizawa closely. "Let the kid learn!"

"You would say that, pervert." Reigen slurs. “And I’m always professional.”

Ignoring their bickering, you place Serizawa's hands where they need to be; one on the side of your face, and the other on your waist, and roll your shoulders back as though you’re preparing for some strenuous exercise. A first kiss is serious business and it wouldn’t be beneficial to him to fuck it up. You want Serizawa to relax, to learn that these things aren’t as scary as they might seem, so that when he does find someone he wants to try it with again, he won’t freeze up and ruin his own chances. From what you’re seen, Serizawa is pretty skilled at that.

Beet red and wide eyed, Serizawa’s gaze darts all over your face, from your own eyes to your mouth and back again. He’s evidently already overthinking this.

"A-are you sure you're okay with this?" Serizawa asks, voice cracking.

You nod feverishly.

Serizawa is very handsome and very cute, so it's hardly a chore to indulge him in the art of making out.

You lean into his palm with a warm, encouraging smile, and dip your head until your lips meet his.

Someone at the table makes a small, high pitched noise but you're not sure if it's Serizawa or one of the others.

The kiss is simple; you don't want to frighten him by adding anything too complex, yet he's eager and surprisingly natural in his movements.

Serizawa makes a content little noise and leans into you, hand tightening on your waist to pull you closer. He tastes like cheap beer and buttery edamame, a whisper of sweetness amongst the heavy alcohol.

Much to your pleasant surprise, his lips part after a moment and you gently tease him into a slightly deeper kiss.

Serizawa seems to be enjoying himself and you're happy to indulge him if he wants to try something more.

When you pull away, you drag your teeth across his lower lip gently and he smiles, hazy, chasing your mouth with his own for a moment.

Dimple lets out a low whistle from across the table and leans forward on the table, chin propped in his hands as he watches with rapt attention.

You break apart with a soft smack! and Serizawa looks over at you like you've punched him in the nose. He's dazed and his gaze is totally unfocused, but there's a little smile on his face and it’s clear that he’s quite happy with his demonstration.

"Okay?" You ask quietly, face still close to his.

Serizawa nods slowly. “Uh huh….”

You grin, squeezing his shoulder as he releases you, and you stand from your stolen seat to go back to your own.

"There you go, it isn’t that exciting, really, but now you know." You shrug.

Dimple laughs, elbowing Reigen in the ribs as he gets up.

"Seems pretty excited to me!" He smirks.

You give him a good-natured shove on the way past before you drop back down next to Reigen.

Now that your focus is back on the room at large, you notice that your boss looks like he's going through all five stages of grief simultaneously; Reigen is clutching his drink tight, gaze fixed on the table top with his jaw set tightly shut. He barely acknowledges you when you sit down again, looking like he's ready to burst at the seams.

"Are you okay?" You ask, giving him a gentle nudge with your shoulder. "If you're gonna puke, you better do it outside."

Reigen glances at you from the corner of his eye. He doesn’t look pleased at all and you feel like you might have just made a mistake.

"'M gonna go get some air." He mutters finally, sliding out of his seat.

Reigen snatches up the half-empty box of cigarettes on the table and stumbles unsteadily off his stool without another word. He doesn't even have the grace to make up an excuse before he leaves.

You watch him go, hesitant to follow him.

“What's his problem?” Dimple says, rolling his eyes. “He’s been so stuck up lately.”

It’s true; for the past week in particular, Reigen has been in a sour mood.

The first time it had been noticeable was the Monday morning you’d worn your first skirt of the summer to the office. It had been hot and stuffy, and you weren’t about to bother with cloying tights or trousers, however Reigen had taken one look at you and gone to work in the spare room until lunchtime. He’d made a few quiet comments about dressing professionally as a woman until Dimple had told him that he’d wear the same thing if Reigen didn’t stop bothering you about it. Since then, he’d done nothing but sulk and avoid you.

The general chatter amongst the three of you returns, until a few minutes of his absence turn into twenty, and eventually you realise you're going to have to go and fetch him. He’s either grouchy again or he’s passed out somewhere and aspirated on his own vomit, and neither seem like a pleasant end to an otherwise fun night.

You excuse yourself and pick your way through the throngs of suits until you reach the exit at the front of the bar.

It takes a few seconds of scanning until you spot Reigen, bathed in the flickering light of the bar’s sign. His grey suit reflects the ugly neons, marring it an odd blue-green, and he stands out against the dim street. He’s trapped behind the ropes of the smoking section nearby, halfway through his cigarette and staring off into the night sky.

Silently, you come to stand at his side.

"How long does it take to smoke?" You laugh, hoping to ease the immediate tension he gives off.

Reigen shrugs, running his tongue over his teeth.

You frown at his unusual silence, slightly concerned that he can barely even bother to dein you with a simple 'hello'.

"Have I upset you?" You ask gently.

Reigen's eyes dart to you, though he stays facing forward, and he clears his throat.

"No, I just…" He sighs around the filter of his cigarette, shaking his head. "It's nothing."

To his right, there's an old looking bench that's clearly been shoved into the corner here for the drunkest smokers to sit at. It's probably to deter people from sitting on the floor when they're wasted and making the place look untidy.

You take a seat on it and gesture for him to sit beside you, running your hands over your arms to ward off the chill of the night.

Reigen looks uncomfortable at your offer but does as he's told anyway. He keeps a distance from you and focuses on puffing out a crude smoke circle so that he doesn't have to look at you.

"Reigen, if I've done something to upset you then it's not nothing." You press him for more detail, shuffling up to sit closer.

You don't care if he doesn't want to be near you, you're starting to panic that you might have ruined a friendship that's extraordinarily important to you.

Reigen is a great boss and an even better friend. He's smart and kind, and he's the most compassionate person you've ever met. For all of his faults, he's an incredible guy.

It doesn't help that you're a little bit in love with him, of course.

No one else in the office knows. You've kept it to yourself and tried to ignore it; the affection you hold for him is inappropriate after all. He's your boss and if you were to confess, he'd only reject you on those grounds. You'd end up losing your job and your friends, and you can't stand the thought of that happening. It's better to just ignore it and admire him from afar.

At your side, Reigen sighs quietly and takes a long drag on his cigarette. He holds his breath for a moment and you can see the cogs in his mind turn as he weighs up if it's worth telling you. After a pause, he breathes out a long puff of smoke and flicks the ash from the end of it. The cherry glows red in the darkness.

"I'veneverbeenkissedeither." Reigen mumbles, ducking his head.

It comes out as a long string of words, barely understandable, and you frown.

"Huh?"

Reigen groans. His shoulders rise up around his ears and you realise that he's embarrassed about whatever he's trying to say.

"I've never been kissed either." He repeats through gritted teeth, eyes fixed on the distance.

"Oh." You breathe.

Oh.

He's not angry, he's jealous.

“But you said-”

“I lied.” He huffs. “Obviously.”

Reigen looks mortified the moment he admits it aloud, his cheeks turning pinker than they had been inside. He sucks in a sharp breath and cringes away from you, humiliated.

"I'm sorry," he cringes. "That was dumb- I shouldn't have said anything, I was just-"

"You're kidding, right?" You say, unable to keep the disbelief from your voice.

Reigen rubs the back of his neck awkwardly, hanging his head as though he's ashamed by it. "No." He mutters.

You're genuinely a bit surprised. "Oh, I just figured…."

"Figured what?" Reigen says, a little bitter. "That people would actually like me?"

The way he says it makes your heart bleed.

Reigen is quite the charmer. You had assumed he'd be very popular in terms of romantic partners. Sure, he's a little caustic at times but ultimately he's a good guy and had you been strangers, you certainly would have tried your luck with him. There's no reason that you can think of that anyone would turn him down, unless he’s the one getting in his own way.

"Reigen, don't be ridiculous." You laugh softly, leaning into his side. "Of course people like you. I like you! You're funny and sweet, and handsome and nice. Anyone would be lucky to have you."

Immediately Reigen's head shoots up and he turns to look at you, face slack with surprise.

"You think I'm handsome?" He asks, his cigarette limp and bobbing about between his lips as he speaks.

Fuck.

The drink has made you slip up. It's probably not normal to tell your boss you think he's the best thing since sliced bread and you feel a heat crawl up your throat. Now really isn't the time. You're both wasted in a public place, far from home and with other people, it's not an ideal place to confess to your boss how much you desperately want him.

"Reigen, listen," you say, attempting to laugh off the accidental admission. "You're a catch!"

You offer him a weak smile and tug on his tie gently. It's supposed to be annoying, but drunk as he is, Reigen leans into you instead.

"I am?" He says faintly.

The warmth spreads from your neck to your cheeks and you're abruptly aware of how close his face is to yours. The cigarette's smoke wafts up between you both.

"Yeah." You shrug, attempting to sound nonchalant. "Of course."

Reigen's dark eyes search yours for a moment, like he's waiting for you to say something else.

When all you do is offer him a tight smile, afraid that you've fucked up, he wrinkles his nose in annoyance.

"Oh," Reigen says petulantly, smoke streaming from his nostrils. "So sweet little Serizawa gets a demonstration but I don't?"

You struggle to keep the surprise from your expression. After his avoidance for the past week, whatever you expected him to say, it wasn’t that.

You figure he must be annoyed at missing out.

A moment of silence passes and then you tilt your head. "Do you.... Want a demonstration?" You ask curiously.

Reigen glances away for a second, blatantly imagining the scenario in his mind. His eyebrows raise at whatever he's considering.

"I mean…. I might….?" He says finally, meeting your gaze again.

There's a slightly hopeful look in his eyes and despite your shock at his interest, you bite down on an excited smile and shift on the bench to straddle the wood, facing him properly.

His ability to charm you even at his most useless is quite something, you think, and you reach into the space between you both and pluck the dwindling cigarette from his lips.

Reigen makes a soft noise of interest and watches you stub it out in the ashtray.

"Face me." You instruct him, gesturing with a finger to show him where you want him.

Reigen does as he's told, a slave to your command in his drunken stupor, and swivels in his seat until his knees bump yours. He's so close that you can feel his body heat through your clothes and it makes you want to crawl inside his suit and stay there forever.

"Put your hands on my waist."

Reigen nods, swallowing thickly. "Yes ma'am."

Something hot curls up inside you at his address. You hadn't ever imagined he might be the type to enjoy being bossed around, but you're very happy to work with it.

His warm hands take up your waist and once he's settled, you take a hold of his tie again and slowly ease him down, lower and lower, until you're half an inch from his face.

Reigen's breath smells like the sugary cocktails he's been knocking back all night and fresh cigarette smoke; you'd usually balk at such a scent, but something about it is distinctly.... Him.

After months of yearning from afar, months of silent longing, you finally kiss him.

Reigen's eyes flutter shut as your lips connect. The tip of his nose is cold as it brushes your cheekbone, but his lips are warm and welcoming, and they part just enough for you to taste him.

Reigen gives a soft groan and leans forward a little more, pressing up as close as he can manage without dragging you into his lap. His hands tighten on your waist and he exhales through his nose, shaky and slow.

The kiss lasts for barely a few seconds.

It's intended to be short and sweet, and then Reigen is dragging you closer again, chasing your mouth as Serizawa had barely an hour before, yet with far more need. His desperation to keep going is oddly attractive.

This time, you risk the chance of overwhelming your subject.

Reigen wants more and you're perfectly willing to give it to him.

You lap at the seam of his lips until he parts them, slowly pressing your tongue to his. Reigen is clumsy and inexperienced, not as naturally graceful as Serizawa, but you do your best to guide him through, turning your head to accommodate him and deepening the kiss whilst he sighs and keens into your touch.

One of his hands comes up from your waist to hold the side of your face, his thumb running along your cheekbone, while his other finds your thigh.

Reigen works his fingers along the hem of your skirt until they just slip underneath the edge of the fabric, kneading the flesh there absentmindedly as he lets himself fall into you more.

You’re so caught up in the moment, all too happy to let him continue, that when the bar door swings open with a loud bang you almost jump out of your skin. It's an immediate reminder that you're still in public and the interruption is enough to make you pull away before things become even more heated.

Sitting back and attempting to catch your breath, you quickly glance over Reigen’s shoulder to check that no other patrons have caught the two of you in a compromising situation. Whoever it is doesn't seem to be interested in your activities, too busy clamouring with their friend about taxis and food as they leave.

When you turn back, Reigen looks like he's going to pass out; he's bright red but completely pale at the same time, breathing heavily and staring right through you.

Alarmed, you sit up straighter. "Are you-?"

"I'm gonna be sick." Reigen chokes out, scrambling up from his seat like a fawn on ice.

You flinch away as he rushes to a bin on the far side of the smoking area. He barely makes it in time to vomit up whatever overpriced drinks he's had tonight, hunched over the top of the can as he coughs and splutters.

Gross as it is, you feel a bit bad for him. His hands are shaking where they clutch the edge of the bin and you go to his side, rubbing circles on his back while he gags. You smooth his hair back from his sweaty forehead and reach over to lift his tie and stop it from dangling into the unpleasant stream until he's done throwing up for all he’s worth.

"Fuck." He gasps into the trash can, breathless and humiliated. "Fuck. I'm so sorry."

After a few more minutes of retching, Reigen manages to choke out another weak apology and straightens up, wiping his mouth with the sleeve of his jacket. He looks terrible; his hair is ruffled and his eyes are glazed, and you hate how sorry you feel for him. It’s horribly gross and if it was anyone else you’d have left them to suffer alone. Yet your empathy for Reigen seems to know no bounds.

"Don't mention it." You say with a smile, smoothing his hair back. "Do you feel better, at least?"

Reigen nods a little, sorry for himself.

"That'll teach you for drinking on an empty stomach." You tease. "Make sure you remember that the sick part was your fault."

Reigen flushes again and ducks his head, bashful. His colour is slowly returning and he looks less nauseated than he had.

A beat of awkward silence passes, filled only by the general chatter of the patrons leaving the bar behind you both, and Reigen clears his throat.

“Listen” he sighs, toeing the concrete with the edge of his shoe. “I’m sorry about just walking out earlier.”

You tilt your head a little, waiting for him to elaborate.

"I didn't mean to get weird about it." He admits, still unable to meet your eyes. "I just…. The kiss…. I wanted it to be me, y’know?”

“What?” You say with a tiny, disbelieving laugh. “You’ve been ignoring me all week, I thought you hated me! I mean, for a second there, I thought you were gonna fire me for-”

“Fire you?!” Reigen says, a little too loudly. “Fuck, no! Never!”

“Then why have you been avoiding m-?”

"Because you're so pretty!" he interrupts, like it pains and infuriates him. "Ever since you started working here, I've barely been able to stop myself from-”

Reigen cuts himself off with a growl of frustration.

“Not to mention that stupid outfit, wearing it in the office like you didn’t know what you were doing! You're so- It's so- Fuck." Reigen takes a deep breath and then plows on, using his opportunity to spill his guts in a much more metaphorical way this time.

"I had to avoid you last week, you keep wearing that little fucking skirt and it’s driving me nuts!" He groans. "I don't hate you, I just can't stop thinking about what you'd look like with it 'round your ankles."

Your knees feel weak at his admission.

"Yeah?" You breathe, biting down on your lip.

"Yeah!" Reigen says, visibly distressed and breathing hard. "And I know I'm your boss, and I know that's weird, and I really, really don’t want to get sued for harassment but I-!"

“Reigen!”

He’s working himself up and the last thing you want is for him to throw up again, so you clamp your hands on his face until he stops sucking in air like a dying fish and shuts up.

“Take a breath.” You say, laughing.

Reigen swallows thickly and breathes in, then out.

“I assumed you just wanted a kiss because you were jealous he got one.” With his face still between your hands, you nod back towards the building in reference to Serizawa, and Reigen shrugs.

“I mean, yeah, that too.” He mutters, pouting a bit.

You can’t hold back the surprised laughter that spills from your throat. This entire time you had assumed he had absolutely no interest in you at all beyond being friends. You thought yourself alone in your longing, lonely in the assumption and upset by the notion that he’d rather move somewhere else than tolerate your presence. The avoidance, the grouchiness, the comments; none of it suggested to you that he felt any other way.

You can’t quite believe your luck.

Reigen must misconstrue your silence for rejection because he starts to back off, reaching up to extricate himself from your grip, and you’re forced to clamp your hands down around his face to keep him still.

“Why didn’t you bring it up?” You ask, ignoring the confused look on his face.

“What was I gonna say; ‘Look, I know I’m your superior but I think you’re really hot and kind and sweet, you wanna get dinner sometime’?.” He scoffs, as though it’s a ridiculous notion.

“Reigen,” You grin. “I’d love to. That wasn’t so hard, was it?”

Reigen’s brows disappear under his fringe and his mouth opens and closes as he flounders for something to say, stunned at your response.

“What?” He manages to choke out.

“I would love to get dinner with you.” You giggle.

Reigen breathes a laugh, the biggest grin you’ve ever seen splitting his face in half, and he nods quickly. “You would? I can do that. Anywhere you want.”

You join him in relieved laughter and loop your arms around his neck, tugging him closer until your bodies are pressed flush together. It feels so good to have him close like this.

Reigen wraps his arms around your waist in response, his big hands wandering from your sides to the small of your back.

“And if it helps,” You smirk, tugging gently on the back of his hair. “I’d also love for you to see me with my skirt around my ankles….”

Reigen groans softly. His eyes fall shut for a moment and when he opens them again, something hot lurks in his gaze.

“Oh yeah?” He murmurs, looking down to your mouth.

You can tell he wants to turn this into a new game and as much as you’d like to indulge him, you’re acutely aware that only moments ago he was puking into a public bin.

“If you’re waiting for another kiss,” you smirk, biting your lower lip. “You better go brush your teeth.”

Reigen releases you so quickly that you almost fall over with a yelp. He swiftly ducks under the rope that seals off the smoking area and starts to jog towards the lit up rows of shops down the street.

“Stay here!” He yells over his shoulder. “The konbini doesn’t shut ‘til one! I’ll be right back!”

“Where are you going?!” You shout after his retreating form.

“Toothpaste!” Reigen says, turning around to throw you a wink.

You can do nothing except laugh as you watch him leg it towards the closest convenience store.

#reigen arataka #reigen arataka x reader #reigen x reader #mob psycho 100 #I have 200k words of reader fics in my drafts do u want them #all for reigen #and god damn the formatting on this site is dogshit #go to my ao3 if you want better #my fics

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jazeswhbhaven · 4 months

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HEY WHB FAM HOW WE DOIN???? New Update coming our way December 20th and BOY HOWDY IS THIS FUCKING EXCITING SHIT. First...3 new L cards, all our seraphim boys (drools at Raphael's card) and I literally shook when I saw they are wearing fucking chastity cages (iirc that's what they're called I used to sell them at an old job) and I'm just here like....OUR ANGEL BOYS WEARING THIS DELICIOUS ASS CAGE???? I'd have so much fun with Raphael because he has a ball gag and he's drooling up a storm fuccckkk. But let's talk about how they'll be obtained. Chance up banner, only for Michael and Raph and Gabe can only be obtained by playing the newest unlocked level in Dark Sanct. "Nightmare Dungeon" And we get new characters??? Cherbiums??? And they're hot too???? HELPPP Guys...I can't do this, I am crawling. And then this happened....the announcement of uncensored content for our Erolabs folks (though unfortunately, I don't think any of that will be allowed on tumblr for us to see....so I'll just have to make a buddy who has erolabs and scream about it on here with cropped/heavily censored pics) Did you fucking peep Lucifer spread out

and his cock

is out

and it's fucking massive

it's just that he has it out there, and we're in the fucking horse stables???? LIKE LUCI PLEASE

I wanna pull for Raph but when shit like this is put in my face I can't help but cream and screm for my blonde haired fallen angel I want him to bite on me while I struggle to suck his cock, I want to cry for him like the pathetic little person I am while he praises me for taking the pain I AM NOT OKAY The fact that I saw this and forgot about everything else in the update really goes to show how down bad I am. 10 toes down bad.

I'm hoping I find the image floating around so I can keep it in my folder down bad.

But best believe I'm about to be on my angel arc and bullshit, so for the next couple days yeah I'm trucking through these requests so I can be fucking ready. The angel headcanons are about to fly even harder than before. *crying that I do have the EROLABS version, it's just that I am so far behind on catching up on it because yeah playing two different platforms f2p is ass and not possible without trying to spend a bit of cash....so yeah RIP to me on seeing uncensored content for my own eyes*

OH AND Chapter 5 is being released in January so we get to see what happens to MC! *side-eyeing Levi so hard rn* And that little Minhyeok mini-game? Our bestie is coming back slowly ^^ That's all for me ranting on this post....I need to stare at Luci some more. A lot more. goddamn that thang is huge

#whb #what in hell is bad #game updates #prettybusy what in “hell” is bad?#whb lucifer #angel-blurbs 🪽#yeah this update killed me in a good way because wow

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lynlyndoll · 4 months

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thinking of friends to lover w chan.. sorry but I have to do this..

you met him at the beach, he accidentally bumped into you

he lit started rambling w his excuses but you had a smile on your face and when he saw you weren't mad he was smth like "Wait, u aren't mad?". he was so confused😭

but you reassured him that this happens and that it isn't a big deal

he still felt bad, so he got you lunch

you asked him to stay, so you two had a lunch in the beach (pls i want that sm-)

and that's how u got to know each other

hanging out, watching movies etc

before you knew it, you both made a 2 yr old friendship

it was so easy w him. everything was just normal for you both

but things started changing, at least on your part, when it was once raining and you saw a cat freezing outside. even though he likes dogs more, he couldn't let the poor soul there, so he immediately went to get the kitten. he then returned to you and started rambling over how the little guy needs a place to stay, so he said he will take it 😭😭 you wanted to take him as well, but when u saw the look on his face, full of worry for the cat, you gave in

that was the moment u started to feel that you wanted to be more than friends. because he was the kindest person ever. because he always thought about the others in such gentle way.

things started changing for him as well, but you didn't know. he really doesn't know how and when and every other question that he had related to the moment couldn't be exactly answered. but the moment he did realize it was when you, hannah and his mom were having lunch together. he came back from gym and saw the three of you chatting so naturally. obviously, he knew that his family liked you, but the moment where he saw all three, he couldn't stop wondering if this would happen if you'd be his girlfriend.

so, you both started pining over eachother, but without the other one knowing

but, he accidentally revealed it while he thought he was writing to changbin

chan : I can't do this- i feel like im going to explode if I'm not going to tell her, man.

you : tell her what? and who are we referring to?😭

chan : bin, we just talked about it. y/n. tell her that I like her?

you : oh!

that's when he knew he fucked up.

he realized you were the one he texted, so he immediately rushed to his room, locking himself up and throwing the phone on the bed.

you rushed to his bedroom, but saw it was locked. "Chan, it's me.."

he groaned in embarrassment, so you continued. "the texts.. are true, right?"

feeling a little bit awkward to talk to you like that, he opened the door and you sighed in relief. he nods at your question, so you smile "I like you too." is what you say as you hug him

aaaand that's how it goes.. sorry, I am so annoyed that I can't write anything else (even though I want to) as a fic, so I did this😭 I'm so mad (on myself) actually bcs I'll have an exam RIGHT AFTER I GET BACK HOME, on the 6th January.. so I can't even focus on anything else bcs my parents keep bugging me about it. "have you studied?" ofc I did, folks, I'm your child ffs don't yall know me?!😭 anyway, the thing is that I'll try as much as I can to write those Christmas fics.😼

#lyn's brain #straykids #straykids x reader #kpop x you #straykids x you #kpop x reader #straykids x yn #kpop x y/n #skz #bangchan fanfic #bang chan x reader #bangchan scenarios #bangchan #bang chan #bangchan x yn #bangchan x y/n #bangchan x you #bangchan x reader

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steddieunderdogfics · 5 months

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These past few days have been amazing! I've taken the time to really decide how I was going to move forward with this space and that starts now!

NO MORE CRITERIA! You may have already seen this, but here's the official announcement! Submit fics you want and YOU decide what an "underdog" fic really is. This was kind of my original idea, but I figured the criteria would help everyone have a jumping point to submit. That didn't work, but it's okay! Now we can just celebrate all the fics without any numbers pressuring us!

Starting in January, there will be a posting schedule! Every day you'll get several recommendations a day, but there will be certain days that are dedicated to different events. Like...

CHALLENGE MONDAYS - Each Friday we will challenge you all to a challenge. Each week will be a little different, but they will always be based around submitting recommendations. On Monday, all the fics posted will be from that challenge! You can suggest challenges here.

WRITERS WEDNESDAYS - Each Wednesday, we'll highlight one author! This author will answer some questions and all the recommendations from that day will be from this author. You can nominate authors here.

FIC FRIDAYS - On weeks without a theme weekend, I'll be giving my personal recs! Not every fic will be from me, but there will be at least two of my personal recs! Challenges will also go up EVERY Friday and we'll announce the theme for the NEXT week!

THEME WEEKENDS - Every other weekend, I'll pause the queue and only post only for a particular theme on Saturday and Sunday! Themes can be voted on here and we'll be announced the Friday before.

I've also changed how I'll be categorizing the fics to show what has been submitted. There will be a page organized by authors and another organized by title. The ratings and tags were just a bit ambitious! I'll still be tagging the actual posts with key tags though!

This may be a lot right now, but this is the best way I can incorporate all of the ideas I have for this page! Will things change in the future? Absolutely! If these ideas don't pan out, then we'll stick to the regular fic recs, but it's fun to give it a try!

Thank you all for bearing with me!!! I've received a ton of support over the last few days and after taking the space to figure out what I wanted to do, it's been wonderful getting back into this.

You can submit fics through our asks and our submissions here!

#steddie fic recs #steddie #steve x eddie #steve harrington #eddie munson #steddieunderdogfics

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dreamescapeswriting · 4 months

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Stray Kids Reaction || Falling Asleep To His Voice

Skz X GN!Reader

⤜MASTERLIST

CHAN:

Chan was completely taken aback when you told him that you wanted him to talk to you in order for you to fall asleep. You never wanted him to think badly about it, it was you that you simply found him relaxing to be around and he felt like a safe space for you.

"It's because I used to watch Chan's room to help...Your voice helps me." Your admitted as he looked down at you and nodded a little, still unsure on what he was supposed to talk about but as time went on he got used to it all.

MINHO:

It weirded Minho out at first and he was kind of offended that you found it nice to fall asleep to him while he spoke to you, but after explaining to him that you didn't find him boring just relaxing he started to do it for you until it was an every night kind of thing. You didn't even have to ask anymore, you'd curl up in bed together and Minho would already have a story that he'd heard that day or something he'd learnt and wanted to share it with you.

CHANGBIN:

Changbin outright refused to do it for you, he thought that it meant you found him boring to talk to and had tried to spend the night on the sofa instead of in bed with you - but you didn't let it happen.

"I don't find you boring, I find your voice relaxing." You explained as you curled up beside him in bed, he was still unsure of it all, wondering if one day you'd leave him because you easily fell asleep to him.

"Please Binnie, I love you, okay? I just find you calm." You whispered as he nodded shyly at you, letting out a small sigh as he tried to think of a story he could tell you.

HYUNJIN:

You were on a plane and no matter what you couldn't get yourself to relax and try and sleep, which was needed since the jetlag was going to throw you through a loop when you landed.

"Can you talk to me? To help me sleep." You begged your boyfriend who was taken back at first but as soon as he started to talk to you about the kinds of paint brushes he was switching to he watched your body visibly relax and he started going into great detail about the types of brushes they were.

JISUNG:

Jisung was thrilled at the thought of getting to do this for you, you already did so much for him so getting to return the favour was something he was enjoying. That and he got to tell you all about the anime he'd been watching in great detail and length while you tiredly asked questions or just fell asleep to your boyfriend's excited voice. Nevertheless though, Jisung adored getting this time with you.

FELIX:

Felix didn't ask too many questions when you asked him to talk you to sleep, he just did it and every single night without fail he would be there talking to you to get you to sleep. Tonight was no different either, he was on his computer playing a video game and he talked you through it, explaining every character's back story as well as their special abilities not even noticing that you'd nodded off until he heard a faint snoring.

"Goodnight angel." He chuckled to himself before turning back to his game for a little while longer.

SEUNGMIN:

Seungmin was a little thrown off by the idea of it but he was slowly warming up to it. You had always struggled to sleep but if Seungmin was there you had hardly any issues at all, especially if he'd talk softly and slowly to you lulling you into sleep.

"I'll tell you about what happened at work," Seungmin stated as he ran his hands up and down your arms, you were already sound asleep by this point but he enjoyed still talking to you and watching as you when you'd smile in your sleep.

JEONGIN:

Jeongin thought that it was the cutest thing in the world when you would fall asleep to the sound of his voice. He'd always brag about it to the boys who then teased him for having a "boring voice" but it wasn't like that in the slightest.

"Does that mean Yn finds you boring?" Felix asked as you all sat around the dorms one rainy day, your head resting on your boyfriend's shoulder.

"No, it means I find him soothing." You mumbled at him, rolling your eyes as you cuddled closer to Jeongin. There was something about the rain and being curled up beside him that made you feel as though you could sleep right now.

"I love you." Jeongin whispers as he threads his fingers with yours and squeezes your hand a little.

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ectonurites · 2 months

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Sorry to bother you, but you seem to know a lot about the comics, and specifically about Tim Drake. I was wondering if you knew off the top of your head when Tim and Steph last canonically dated? Because I see people blaming Meghan Fitzmartin a lot, but I could've sworn that they last broke up before she became Tim's author.

So, the people 'blaming' Meghan Fitzmartin are correct—but I can understand some confusion happening because the breakup occurred off-panel. So like, if you weren't following things closely at the time these books were coming out, it might seem like the first Tim story Fitzmartin wrote was referencing a breakup that already happened somewhere else... but that is not the case.

The other possible confusion point would be that there was an earlier 'break up & get back together' storyline with them in the Rebirth era, a few years before she wrote Tim.

To briefly go over the Rebirth & onward Tim/Steph dating timeline just to clear things up (and I'll be using cover dates just for consistency, so if you want release date subtract two months):

Detective Comics #934-935 August 2016 [written by James Tynion IV] Tim & Steph are established to be dating in Rebirth continuity. We don't see the actual moment they start dating, we're just shown that this is now the situation.

Detective Comics #940 November 2016 [written by James Tynion IV] Tim is 'killed' (he's not really but everyone thinks he is, and he is out of the picture for a while) and thus that effectively pauses any relationship between he and Steph, obviously.

Detective Comics #969 January 2018 [written by James Tynion IV] Tim is back and reveals himself as alive to Steph, and the two of them resume their relationship. After a short timeskip, we then learn that in the aftermath of his return... Tim is not being honest with Steph about his plans (to not go to Ivy like he said he would, to instead continue hero-ing indefinitely).

Detective Comics #970 February 2018 [written by James Tynion IV] Tim & Steph start to have some tension here because of how he's overworking himself, how he's handling things with her, and there's a moment where she says she's leaving, he asks if she means 'The Belfrey, the team, or me?' and she says 'I'll get back to you on that.'

Detective Comics #974 April 2018 [written by James Tynion IV] In the aftermath of the team sort of exploding due to ~plot events~ Steph breaks up with Tim while he's throwing too much of himself into his work.

Detective Comics #981 July 2018 [written by James Tynion IV] More plot stuff happens (a whole big mess with Brother Eye) but once that's settled, the two reunite and rekindle their relationship as they head off ‘to Ivy University’ as they tell Bruce, but we know that’s not actually where they’re going.

Young Justice (2019) #5 July 2019 [written by Brian Michael Bendis] Flashbacks show us that after leaving Gotham, Tim & Steph had specifically gone to see the Justice League/Zatanna for help with timeline memory things rather than going to Ivy. Even though they’re in separate places at the main timeline of the book, this shows us that they're still together.

Young Justice (2019) #11-20 February 2020 - January 2021 [written by Brian Michael Bendis] Steph & Tim immediately try to get ahold of one another via text once Tim's back on the correct earth, and work on getting back in touch until eventually reuniting. They are shown together [and depicted as still dating] during the later parts of the book.

Dark Nights: Death Metal: The Last Stories of the DC Universe #1 February 2021 [written by Joshua Williamson, James Tynion IV, and Scott Synder] Shows the two of them together within the larger group of former Titans/YJ members—specifically one panel towards the end shows us Tim with his arm around her while they talk with others [fun fact that’s the panel my icon is from I just had edited Steph’s head out of the way]. As I recall/as far as I'm aware, this issue is the last time we see them interacting together/together as a couple before Future State and then the Infinite Frontier relaunch. [disclaimer that there could be like... a splash page group shot or something that I'm forgetting elsewhere during the Dark Nights: Death Metal event but like, that's not actual interaction that's just physically being present in the same group shot].

NON-CANON BUT RELEVANT: Future State: Robin Eternal #1-2 March - April 2021 [written by Meghan Fitzmartin] During the Future State event which was used largely to tease/set up plotlines for the Infinite Frontier relaunch, in this potential future Tim & Steph are seemingly no longer together but still on okay terms—teaming up in the story, but with clear tension and history there.

Batman: Urban Legends #4 August 2021 [written by Meghan Fitzmartin] We learn that Tim & Steph broke up off-panel before the events of the issue. Steph appears in the following issue further reiterating that they recently broke up.

So yeah! They broke up off-panel and this was first referenced in Batman: Urban Legends #4, thus under Fitzmartin's pen.

#sam explains #i did briefly reread each of these issues im referencing here to confirm they had the content i thought they did but i was doing that #in a very Speedy way so. keep that in mind. but like the general events here im certain of. + i was keeping up with almost all of these #things as they originally were released. [except like. some of the later parts of the 'tec run. i was there at the start but checked out #for a while bc busy with college lmaoooo but i was back in and keeping up with stuff once later parts of YJ 2019 was coming out]#<- though to be clear i have READ all of these. i just mean the later parts of 'tec i read like a while after their release

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keeskiwi · 2 months

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I had a transgenderization surgery 1 month ago and I got the clear to stop wearing my post-op binder yesterday, and I keep feeling the desire to write out my thoughts somewhere but not knowing where, and then I remembered tumblr is The transgender website, so, you know, why not.

I had a double incision top surgery on January 30th. It feels pretty surreal in some ways. I first started experimenting with gender things in late 2010, grabbed a binder from Underworks in 2011, then kind of coasted along in a state of "well, a haircut, name change, and some new clothes have been working out for me mostly well enough and my breasts aren't that big anyway and maybe it's not a big deal even though every year I'll research if I can make my insurance cover it just in case and daydream a bit about something horrible happening that would require my breasts to get removed, with a side of quietly burning with envy when I see someone else get medical care for their dysphoria." For. A while.

Late 2022 I finally decided I would bring it up with my doctor, and after over a year of horrible insurance wrangling I finally ended up with a consult in early January, and then suddenly they called me back and said they could squeeze me in by the end of the month.

January 30th I got up at early-o-clock, went to the hospital, met my surgery team, got knocked out, and woke up with a new chest. I'm really glad I didn't have to travel for surgery and was back home that evening. Between that and having two partners (one of whom has had top surgery himself) to care for me afterwards, I feel really grateful.

Anyway yeah, this was the most significant surgery I've had before. It was your standard double incision, although I opted to go without nipple grafts, for a couple reasons:

I had heard that nips were kind of tricky healing-wise, and as a health-anxiety-prone kind of person I didn't really need the extra fear of something going wrong there in my life.

Especially because I didn't have any particular attachment to the idea of nipples in the first place. Sometimes I wonder if this was an extension of wearing a vaguely skin-tone binder for the past decade+. Any time I saw myself with a flattened chest, it was without nipples, because they were being hidden by the binder ha.

Additionally, a thing I've struggled with wrt medical transition is that it often feels like the goal for my agab is to transition towards masculinity, and while I'm okay being mistaken as male (especially over being mistaken as female) it's actually kind of important to me that I'm...not male? Masculinity as gender neutrality is something that really irritates me. I'm not any flavor of trans guy. So going no-nips felt like a way to make a conscious change to my body that was perpendicular to the masculinity/femininity binary.

And finally, while exploring the concept I found out that some people really hate the idea of people transitioning to having nippleless chests, because to be human is to have nipples (I guess?) so removing your nipples was trying to remove yourself from humanity (I??? guess???) and while there's a LOT to unpack there, as someone with only a passing identification with the concept of humanity I found this appealing in a "don't threaten me with a good time" kind of way.

Maybe I'll just get tattoos of wasps there instead.

The first time I saw myself at my first post-op was like--my chest is covered in incisions and tape and dried blood and marker and swelling but somehow it was still the most comfortable and appealing thing I had ever seen, and I keep feeling kind of amazed? I think that I had been really focused on like, specific Things I Could Do Post-Top Surgery, like wearing better-fitting T-shirts or taking my shirt off during the summer when it was hot, and I didn't fully realize just how...good it would be just existing? At first I thought it was hyperbolic thinking, but the more I consider it the more I feel that I've spent more time voluntarily looking at and interacting with my chest in the past month than I have the whole rest of my life. Some of it was forced aftercare from the surgery of course, but I lose a bunch of time each day just getting caught in front of mirrors. I didn't realize that I could like the way I look under my clothing so much.

And things like, realizing I've been saying "my chest [euphemistic, regretful]" in regards to my breasts my whole life, so I keep wanting to say "I don't have a chest anymore"--but the thing is, I do! I do have a chest still, and "my chest" is now something I feel happy to claim because I got to choose it. It's a little ouchy and lumpy and at the moment it looks like someone taped poison ivy to it because my skin finally got sick of the surgery tape and staged a revolt, but it's still the best chest I've had in living memory, and it's only going to get better from here.

I'm just really happy.

#in which I ramble #top surgery

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russellsppttemplates · 8 months

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Papa loves you so much, princess (Mick Schumacher)

Mick and Y/N find out their family is growing

Note: english is not my first language. this is another long piece that I hope you enjoy! I have been talking about this since January, so this is ver long overdue!

my masterlist

Tw: mentions reader's period and pregnancy

Getting up from the bed, you were fortunately quick enough to reach the bathroom in time to pour your guts out on the toilet, leaning on the toilet's side to support your torso. You were already up by the time Mick walked inside the bathroom, his sleepy expression with some traces of concern, "I told you I shouldn't have had that last piece of dessert", you pointed your finger at him through the mirror while you splashed your face, "you kept looking at it like you were a dog that was abandoned on the road, and then when I asked if you wanted my piece, I swear I saw happy tears in your eyes", your husband teased you, rubbing your back in a comforting manner, "do you want me to get you anything?", he asked, "just some cuddles in bed should do the trick", you muttered, allowing him to carry you back to the bed for a few more hours of hopefully uninterrupted sleep.

After leaving work, you stopped by the grocery store since you and Mick had noticed you were running low and running out of a few items at home, "we just had a snack break and the next part of the meeting should be the last one, I'm sorry I'm not helping you", he said over the phone while you browsed the aisles, "it's okay, handsome. You can still help me out here, though. I'm the cleaning section and I already have dish soap and the spray for the wooden cabinets, anything else?", you asked, earning a negative answer from him, "no, that's all I think. Next is the bathroom one, right? We are running low on toilet paper, and I used the last plaster yesterday. You only had one box of tampons in the cabinet so given that you are about to have your period, see if you need more of them", he pointed out, grabbing your attention to the matter. It should have started by now, you checked the date on your watch. And you were never late.

"We also need those tissues you keep on your bedside table, I used some today and I noticed they were the last ones", you could hear the smile on his voice, "alright, bub. I'll see you at home, have a good meeting!", you dialed off, grabbing the things he mentioned before looking at the pharmacy section.

You were never late, so it had to be this, right? Barring any other health situations, all of your symptoms aligned with pregnancy symptoms: you had been nauseous, feeling sick (and maybe it wasn't the stolen dessert's fault), you kept falling asleep whenever you rested on the sofa at home and Corinna had complimented the way one of your summer dresses fitted you, claiming that the neckline looked beautiful on you. And you and Mick had been trying, not with a whole calendar but rather just not using protection and seeing where it led you, and maybe this was it. Grabbing two boxes for the sake of it, you put them in your shopping trolley before heading to the till to pay for everything so you could go home.

When Mick got home, dinner was already on the table while you also fed Angie her own dinner, his kiss on your forehead coming with an apology for having arrived just in time for it, "no need to apologise, myself and miss Angie kept ourselves busy", you petted her soft fur before heading to wash your hands, joining Mick at the table and enjoying the meal.

"Does it taste okay to you?", you asked Mick, the taste of the broccoli seemingly off to you, "yes, tastes like this dish always tastes. It's very good, why do you ask?", he questioned, "I don't know, tastes funny to me", you mumbled, using your fork and knife to push the green vegetable to the edge of your plate, "maybe you got a bad one", he noted. That was another symptom, you thought, remembering when one of your friends couldn't eat her favourite meal while she was pregnant because she claimed it tasted different.

"Actually, I've been having a few symptoms, and they are all compatible with-", you were interrupted by your husband, "pregnancy", he smiled, seeing your brushed and stunned face, "I've noticed them too. You haven't told me you are craving your usual sweets when you're on your period, your boobs look even more amazing but the moment I so much as graze my finger in the skin you hiss because of the pain, you're not one to take naps during the day but the moment your head hits the pillow you're out like a light, and it's not common for you to have a bad stomach", he reasoned, making you blush even harder, "Why didn't you say something though?", you asked softly.

Mick shrugged his shoulders, "I just didn't want to burden you, or maybe I was keeping my hopes up and I didn't want to ruin yours, or point out something about your body like that, I'd never want to do so in a way that could be harmful", he answered apologetically, making your get up and go sit on his lap, "you could've said something, I wouldn't be offended, I think anyway, apparently pregnant women get mood swings so I can't speak for sure", you shrugged your shoulders, "truth is, I got some pregnancy tests at the store today because I also thought the same thing, but I wanted to do them with you", you looked at him, "but I don't know how to deal with this hope, like, I could just have some bug, but it is also true that everything checks out...", you fiddled and played with his fingers, "we take it step by step, if you'd like", your husband began softly, "and if you're not pregnant, we can keep trying", he explained, grabbing your hand once you nodded, heading to the bathroom so you could do the tests.

The plastic sticks were on the counter, Angie lying on the bathroom floor while Mick sat on the edge of the tub wirh you on his lap, "just a little bit more, liebling", he kissed the side of your head, "I'm sorry", you whispered, gaining his questioning look, "if I'm not pregnant, I got both of our hopes up for nothing", you explained, feeling his fingers lift your chin up to look into his eyes, "no need to apoligise, liebling. We just keep trying, it's not like we mind trying", he winked, looking at his watch to see the time was up, "I'm ready when you are", he said soflty.

You got up, picking up the sticks and seeing that both of them had the same information, "it won't be trying for a baby, but I've heard that sex while you're pregnant is a whole another level of sensations", you smiled at Mick, showing him the positive results.

"We're having a baby?", Mick mumbled, still not sure if he had grasped what you said in the right way, "we are, baby Schumacher is going to be here in nine months", you cried out, smiling as Mick cuddled you, his arms circling your before spinning you, "Angie! You're going to be a big sister!", Mick said once he put you down.

"I remember reading about these old wives' that help you guess the gender of the baby, and your grandmother did some on me for both of you and they turned out pretty accurate, I think", Corinna said as she sat in the outdoor sofa in front of you.

Since Gina was visiting, you and Mick decided to invite her and Corinna to spend the day together, Angie sitting next to her auntie while you sat next to Mick, "Oh, that would be fun!", Gina said as she straightened her back, picking up her phone so she could look them up on the Internet while Corinna started with the ones she knew, "they say that if you have a pointed belly towards the front, it means you're having a boy, and if you have a rounder bump and wider hips, it means it's a baby girl", she said, seeing Mick quickly ask for you consent before he helped you stand as he lifted your t-shirt, "what do we think? Pointy or not so much?", you did a turn around yourself, "I think it's rounder", Mick said earning a nod from his mother, "me too", Gina said, "but I've always had wider and rounder hips", you tried to reason as Gina wrote girl and a stick next to it to help count.

"The next one was that sweet cravings were sign of a baby girl, and salty cravings were sign of a baby boy", and Mick wiped the smug smile off his face, "I've been eating a lot of savoury stuff", you nudged your husband while his sister wrote down the tie.

Gina opened the lunar calendar on her phone while the four of you looked at all the details they asked for, "it's a girl according to this one!", Mick yelled way too close to your ear, "another point for babygirl then", you said, cuddling back to his side and giggling at everyone's exciting.

You saw and tested a couple more and, without realising it, you tried the last one without noticing it was the last, only for it to make another tie between babyboy and babygirl, "so that's it?", Mick said, not expecting it to turn out like this, "you just have to wait and see, you know, like all the people do because you can know for sure on the ultrasound", Gina teased him.

Once you got to the OB/GYN, Mick offered to go get you checked in at the desk while you went to find a comfortable chair to sit in while you waited, "final bet: are they a baby boy or a baby girl?", Mick said once he sat down with you, his hand holding yours to calm down your nervous thoughts. The ultrasounds always made you nervous, always wondering if everything was alright and as it should be, so having Mick there to support you and distract you was appreciated, "I think they're a baby boy, and he looks like his papa", you cradled his cheek on your palm, "I think they're a baby girl, and she has your kindness and empathy. It's just my gut feeling", he smiled, kissing the top of your head while he moved your conjointed hands to rest on your bump, feeling the baby kick, "not my chubby cheeks?", you playfully gasped, "what can I say? I think the Schumacher genes are much too strong", he teased you, looking up to the door when your name was called.

Entering the room and greeting your doctor, she asked you a couple of questions before asking you to lay on the little bed, the gel cold on your bump as she moved the wand around, "okay, everything looks good, strong heartbeat for little one and mother as well", she smiled, "I can see it. Do you still want to know?", she asked one last time, earning a nod from both you and Mick, "you're going to have a baby girl, congratulations!", she announced.

Your hand squeezed Mick's, feeling him press a kiss to the top of your head as you both looked at your baby on the screen, "we're having a little girl? Liebling, it's a little girl", he said, his eyes tearing up as he kept looking at the screen. Despite having feelings and guesses about it, neither of you didn't have any preference, feeling happy just with the idea that you were carrying a combination of you and Mick, but you couldn't help but get all goddy as you imagined Mick with a little daughter, knowing she would have him wrapped around her finger from the moment she was born. Even thinking now, she has him wrapped around her finger since you both found out you were pregnant.

"She looks good, there isn't anything that looks concerning. The measurements are all within the norm, everything looks good. Congratulations, mama and papa!", she smiled, "do you want copies to take home?".

While she went to get the slightly exaggerated number of copies of baby Schumacher (Mick wanted everyone that was important in his life to have one), your husband helped you clean the skin on your bump, "are you happy?", you looked at him, not seeing any signs of uneasiness but feeling his a little bit tense, "I am, liebling", he said, "but she's going to be here soon, you know? Little one is growing so fast, I can't believe we're past the half way point", he admitted, "I just don't want to disappoint any of you", he gulped, making you craddle his face with your hands, "My love, I know you and believe me, if how everything has gone until now is any indicator, we are going to have princess treatment", you smiled softly on an attempt to calm him, "thank you for sharing this with me, though. You can always share your worries with me, Mick", you finished, kissing his lips passionately, "I love you, liebling", he kissed you back, "and you little one, papa loves you so much, princess".

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