#I’m obsessed with the Cali crew | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

stranger-chichka · 1 year

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Hi! So, first of all, you are one of my favorite blogs and i adore your analyses on ST. So, because of that i thought i could share this thing i just found out a few days ago... sorry in advance if it gets too long.

I'm a computer science student, and a few days ago in one of my classes my professor started talking about the evolution of technology and specifically computers (i know this sounds irrelevant but).. as he was talking he mentioned one specific company that caught my attention - Sinclair Research Ltd.

Since i'm obsessed with everything Stranger Things, i decided to check on it. Apparently the were big in the scene in th 70s-80s these days they mostly do research. Since it was computer related i decided then to check for Henderson, since he is the one most related to computers.

This took me nowhere, but i was adamant to find something. Anything. So i decided to move on to the next.

I looked for anything Wheeler related in computer science. And get this;

In the 50s, David Wheeler invented a way to jump through different parts of a code to do different operations. Like, if in the middle of your code you want to sum two numbers, and that's something you'll need to do over and over, instead of writing the same code for the operation over and over (which would make the program heavier) you create a subroutine, you leave a trail to follow, say, a dummy number. The program jumps, to where you want it and then after it it goes back to where it was before, or wherever you want it to go.

Now, the interesting thing about this jump in the subroutine is its name.

This is called a 'Wheeler Jump".

Now, since the upside down is stucked in 1983 and to hide from Vecna you need a happy memory, a memory of light, which implies the past, how we are thrown off by the painting being of the party and not the swingset as many Bylers believed, the weird monologue which i find like a bad copy paste from the one in the shed and how Vecna is related to clocks, i believe Mike is gonna jump. Here could go some thought about Mike jumping from the cliff in season 1 and how Ted asked Mike in s2, if one of his friends jumped if he would jump too. I do not even know what could any of that mean but I've read theories on Labyrinth, Back to the Future, flickergate, and Mike going missing and lettergate. It could be any of those, or none of them, because a coincidence could actually happen.

My personal bet goes to:

We've seen Mike trying to send a message-a code- (his real feelings), but because of dummy actions they were sent the wrong place (his platonic feelings were sent to were the romantic ones were suppose to go and vice-versa).

Anyways, Mike jumping could possibly have a lot of meanings, so i thought to share a weird base (?) for anyone wanting to use it in any theory or something.

Hi, anon! <3

I’m not that of an analyst really, but thank you for your sweet words and I appreciate someone like the stuff I come up with at times.

The things you wrote about are SO INTERESTING, thanks for sharing it with me!!! I’m sure there MUST be connection between “Wheeler Jump” and Mike’s character, especially considering that Mike has got that poster of a man with computer in his basement. The man who happen to be Charles Babbage. The one who is credited with inventing the first mechanical computer. The one who is referred to as “father of computing.”

What made me even more excited about everything you’ve mentioned is:

- David Wheeler is credited with the invention of the subroutine, which is referred to as the CLOSED subroutine (and Mike is in the CLOSET), and gave the first explanation of how to design software libraries (I see librarygate everywhere, lmao);

- he was born in Birmingham and the Cali crew went to Bingham’s house so Suzie could help them with the number to trace the computer’s location in s4 (Mike comes up with that idea). Not to mention Suzie was the one who told Planck's Constant in s3 which was the code the commies used for the safe in which two keys were. The keys needed to stop the machine from opening the gate. To CLOSE the gate. And in the beginning of s4 Suzie also hacked into Hawkins school computer program to change Dustin’s grades (he is later shown discussing it with Mike during).

“Mike trying to send a message/a code (his real feelings), but because of dummy actions they were sent to the wrong place (his platonic feelings were sent to were the romantic ones were suppose to go and vice-versa).”

So, basically, Mike got lost in his own feelings because of his closed subroutine that theoretically should’ve made everything easier for him??? Suzie helped him with the number (the number=Mike’s feelings) and there’s one person in the show who says “I’m good with numbers.” Erica Sinclair. Erica, who drinks Minute Maid Grape Juice that is a reference to Queen’s music video on the song “I Want To Break Free.” Erica, who refers to Lucas as Jason’s boyfriend in the most careless and normal way possible. And there’s so much more. She mentions Nintendo to Jason and then the Cali crew (Mike & Will in particular) is lying to Suzie about the same goddamn Nintendo (oops, sorry, Americantendo). Erica, who’s on the poster RHE HEART with the rest of the party (x).

Also, Will’s school project was about Alan Turing - mathematician, computer scientist and codebreaker.

Unfortunately, I can’t go deeper here because I’m a total zero at IT and maths but everything you’ve mentioned is related to the code and one more code in the show is “when blue meets yellow in the west.” What also serves as a code in ST? Music. I already wrote about how the Duffers use the songs and original soundtracks to tell us more about what’s really happening in the show and to deliver the message that is somehow sensitive. Something they wants to make a huge plot twist for the GA. Mike’s orientation. He is in the CLOSET. If music is a code for us to better understand the show and the characters, it means that characters’ Spotify playlists are as much important as the show itself. @lesbianmindflayer analyses both Mike’s and Will’s playlists so I highly recommend to subscribe on her YouTube channel and follow her here. Almost every song on Mike’s playlist is about running. He’s running form his true self. Do I even have to mention “Smalltown Boy” being the first song on the playlist?

In s4 it’s said “Music reaches parts of the brain words can't.” The Duffers don’t use plain text to say “Mike Wheeler’s gay” or “Byler endgame”, but they use music for that. “Being in the Closet (at Rink-O-Mania)” is one of many examples of how they’re doing it. Not to mention other queer coding such as ONE WAY sign, closets etc.

@bylerschmyler @there-was-a-hole-here-itsgonenow your additions always make every post better so I’m really interested in your thoughts on it!

#the codes in stranger things #gay mike wheeler #byler #mike wheeler #will byers #erica sinclair #suzie bingham #stranger things #stranger things analysis

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hongism · 9 months

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I’m up to date now on MOC and i’m breathless. I need oxygen. My mind is travelling at 101029 mph. Besides my initial analysis i’ve been thinking more about Hongjoong. Is it fair to say at this point the guy is obsessed with MC?

I know he’s obsessed in the sense of making her comply and being able to use her to reach his goal. But there’s just something about how her name is always coming out of his mouth. He’s so quick to push how much he hates her and her need to go against him. He’s also been veryyy caught up on the idea of making her think he doesn’t think about her. How he wanted mc to know he didn’t want to save her from the last capture, to how he wants mc to know that San was the one to offer her to the mission. It just feels he’s constantly trying to make her believe he doesn’t give a shit. Also, when he had that chess game with Minho the whole conversation was about her?? boy we’re supposed to believe you couldn’t care less??

I know i know that she’s now a crew member and there are a bunch of reasons to why he’s so caught up on her. buuut it’s getting too much now Joong please just admit you want her to submit for more reasons than you think. The guy definitely has a superiority complex disorder but it has to be more than that.

Loved the chapter so thanks for providing it to us and feeding us well caly🫶🫶

i think it's safe to say that at any given moment, moc thoughts are also moc hongjoong thoughts! he is one of our main culprits after all 🤓 it is SUPER fair to say that hongjoong is DEEPLY obsessed with mc, and it is equally fair to say that that feeling is mutual!

there is that very obvious surface level obsession that correlates with his obsession with sirens and the treasure, but there's also that other level of obsession he's got going on too. it almost feels a bit like he's trying to push this idea that he's sooooo unbothered and sooooo doesn't care about her bc he's trying to convince himself that that's the truth 🧐 and yet every time he tries to push that idea into mc's head, she thinks he's behind it all and is actively trying to torment her! kinda sus that he can't shut up about her even when it comes to having conversations with other people like could he BE more obvious?!

hj has so many issues with control and power dynamics and SUCH a bad case of narcissism that it's sickening but he's also sitting there denying the reasons why he wants her under his thumb and control heh he's a very demented character to say the least!

i'm so glad you enjoyed the chapter thank you for indulging my hongjoong thoughts :3 <3

#moc: spoilers #caly answers

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swashbuckling-chicken · 2 years

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In all seriousness I like Steddie too, but it does bother me that Eddie gets so much attention as a character introduced in S4 but Argyle and his ships get overlooked by and large even though he's pretty fun too. I really vibe with his and Jonathan's relationship. I can't help but feel like if he was white, fans would be obsessed with him.

(After writing this I realize it is a lot longer than I meant it to be and it has all probably been said before and better, but here are my thoughts. Also keep in mind that my view is a bit limited because I mostly stay within my web of mutuals, all of whom are very positive and respectful, because I know that the wider fandom is a minefield.)

Anon, I do agree with you. I have a lot to say about this.

Before anything, I would like to point out that the cali crew didnt get nearly their deserved amount of screen time and the writers didn’t even bother to give Argyle a last name, so the writing and production wasn’t setting him up for success, whereas Eddie was basically destined to become extremely popular (he's just the kind of person that fandom loves). None of this is an excuse for any disrespect but I do think this is something to point out that it’s not surprising that fandom that seems to be overlooking argyle when his own writers aren't even giving him the care he deserves (though this is obviously not the only reason for a lot of the shit out there).

And yes absolutely this fandom does have a problem with not prioritizing characters of color, and flocking to any conventionally attractive white guy, including problematic racist abusers (looking at everyone in love with billy and sleeping on Lucas). And yes, this also includes Eddie’s quick rise in popularity over argyle, who was introduced in the same season (from what I've seen, chrissy is more popular than argyle with some people, despite only being in one episode).

St*ddie was very predictable in its rise in popularity (I much preferred when it was like 4 gay people yelling “OH MY GOD STEVES WEARING HIS JACKET” that was honestly st*ddie’s best era and the only one I really participated in). It’s two attractive white guys, which automatically means they’ll be shipped, and on top of that they actually do have chemistry, so even better. Like jargyle, ronance also has a much smaller fan base than st*ddie, since it’s a wlw ship (but that also does have a lovely community and does have a fair amount of supporters because of the fruity four. Jargyle has an even smaller fan base than them I just wanted to point out there are some similarities, also jargyle ronance solidarity). I do like to reblog jargyle things to spread that ship and because I know some of my mutuals love that ship so Id like them to see that stuff. Also it’s just a solid ship I genuinely believe that they just make out occasionally also just the vibes. Anon, I’m not entirely sure what you want me to say here but those are my feelings on the fandom and the ship, I hope you got something out of it and thank you for coming to my ted talk :)

tldr:

#I broke out the proper capitalization and grammar for this #at least i did my best and got rid of the all lowercase aesthetic #this is more of an essay than i meant it to be but whatever #love jargyle i hope for their happiness #argyle stranger things #jargyle

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crazy-shapes · 2 years

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ST Vol 2 SPOILERS

I just finished Vol 2, so here are some thoughts.

- The Vecna scream when the Demodogs and Demogorgon got set on fire was so fucking funny

-Why do they continue to do Will so dirty 💀 He got so many cringe-y, over dramatic lines.

-I thought Will pretending that El had asked for the painting to help her and Mike’s relationship was actually really interesting. . . but Will sobbing while Mike was oblivious was so hilarious and sad.

- the lipstick on Robin’s teeth while she was making sandwiches and talking to Vickie was so distracting

-Why did they have to kill Eddie!?!?!? It was so unnecessary. It felt like they did it just for the drama. He wasn’t even posthumously proven innocent. Gutted.

-The scenes with Lucas and Max in the Creel House were top tier. Caleb was right when he said that Sadie was the best actor. They both did amazing.

-Getting to see Lucas and Erica be siblings was really nice.

-Watching Johnathan awkwardly standing in the background of 90% of the reunions while everyone else hugged killed me.

- Jason got let off too easy. Sure, he got ripped in half and disintegrated, but that wasn’t enough.

- the very serious montage of the groups getting ready to fight Vecna with cut scenes of Argyle making a pizza 💀

- the Cali crew returning to Hawkins and dramatically getting out of the van, acting like they fucking did anything.

- the Mike and Hopper Moment was sweet, I’ll give ‘em that.

- The Will and Johnathan heart to heart was sweet too. . . . . But also anytime someone spoke to Will for more than five seconds he started crying. Like, can someone please get him help? I get it, his entire personality is apparently Sad™️ and Gay™️ but it’s getting ridiculous at this point.

- Joyce and Hopper!!!! Finally.

- I like these new Russian friends and was incredibly surprised when neither of them died. . . But I’m sure they’ll be done for in S5. Or just won’t be in S5.

- The parallels of Henry’s Mind Flayer drawing and Will’s!!!

- I loved all of your theories for why Karen had her own poster. Haha.

- Max’s monologue about Billy was actually really good and made sense to their narrative. I see that the Billy apologists aren’t liking it too much tho.

- I’m all for Steve and Nancy ok, but it got too much for me to handle without eye rolling.

- Why were there so many weird filler conversations? They seemed out of place and like they were just trying to throw little character facts out to the audience.

-Why does Mike always look so confused?

- Robin and Vickie are gonna be endgame.

- Robin slow mo throwing the Molotov cocktail and then Nancy firing the shotgun into Vecna was fucking next level.

- Dustin screaming for Eddie as Eddie cut the sheet and moved the mattress so Dustin couldn’t come back in after him. So good.

- Does Argyle not have a family he needs to contact?

- El saying Goodbye to Brenner instead of answering him was Boss AF.

-I loved that Vecna showed Nancy his entire life story and what he was planning to do to Hawkins and was like “go and tell the young girl who I’m creepily obsessed with cause she beat me in a fight once that I’m gonna destroy the world in a tantrum.” And Nancy just said ‘Nah.’

Ok that’s it for now. I’ll shitpost more later.

#stranger things #stranger things spoilers #stranger things 4 #eleven #Jane hopper #jim hopper #joyce byers #johnathan byers #will byers #mike wheeler #nancy wheeler #karen wheeler #steve harrington #dustin henderson #lucas sinclair #erica sinclair #eddie munson #max mayfield #spoilers

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zumpietoo · 2 years

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Pictures sent to your DM. Ms know it all tattler lala is so very wrong and there is proof. Cole was in cali for a photo shoot this weekend. Whatever fits this hate blog though. I will say the sock accounts are doing a better job with cole content then you are.

Oh, troll—-thanks for outing yourself….

First off, turns out you ARE right, it IS him in this pic:

Buuutt....you certainly didn’t present this in a remotely positive manner (and are apparently obsessed with everything and outed yourself fully as who you are and the Lala obsessed troll, to boot---but more on that later...)

yes, yes.....

Again, I was glancing on it on my phone, I was wrong....but do note the obsession with Lala, AGAIN...

Oh and that’s Ari’s make up artist....

Somebody (who had been following me for 2+ weeks prior, BTW, from their creepy sock) is verrryyyyy pissed off that I didn’t believe them....I remember that personn....

Unblocked me to send that, then deactivated and sent me anon hate....and yes, it IS Carmel-by-the-Sea....in Monterey County, SIX HOURS from LA, with its own area airport.

They’ve also ALL been there ALL weekend (it turns out to be a pretty extensive shoot, with a quite large crew)....NATASHA---not Nina (if not others) is STILL there this AM....

Sooo....what do we have from this?

Deuxmoi was still a false sighting

Cole’s fashunnn photography career is just fine, after all

This infuriates the haters...

Cole continuing to give gigs to peeps he meets, friends of friends

This was from a sock account of inahologram/bloodlineee/colemsprouseupdates---and turns out she’s also the person obsessed with Lala, who’d pop up here, periodically, as well...

Same rage if I didn’t believe her immediately, same obsessive OMG!!! Cheater!!!! trolling, same obsession with myself and my friendships with other people....

Byeeee....

P.S. The irony here? I’m thrilled I was mistaken (for an entire 5 minutes!!!)---again, fashunn shoot, didn’t film this weekend with PP, Crotchi and FT, Deuxmoi STILL proven wrong, etc....

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christinesficrecs · 4 years

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Hey Christine, my Sterek Queen! I'm in a big Sci/fi mood lately and I was wondering if you had a list of the best Sterek Sci/fi AUs to share with us? Thanks, you are wonderful! 😘

Hey! 💜 Well I may know a few! I also have a tiny Stargate obsession. 🤷🏻‍♀️

the ring of the ancestors is not a euphemism by kellifer_fic | 10.6K

Stiles hadn't noticed the way the entire commissary had gone silent when the guy had approached his table, or the two military escorts that had been flanking him, looking at each other like maybe they should be intervening but weren't sure how. All he saw was someone stealing the last dessert from him and Stiles didn't think about it, he just reached across the table and snatched it back with a, "What the hell, dude?"

In Other Words, Baby, Kiss Me by primroseshows | 61.2K | Explicit

Stiles has simple goals in life. To successfully complete his secret radar project without getting fired, to get a cottage on the Moon, and to untangle his mess of feelings for Moon Station 3 deputy, Derek Hale. Heck, he'll even settle for two of the three.

When Life Hands You Werewolves by uraneia | 4.6K

A month ago John's team rescued a former runner named Derek Hale. He's great to have on offworld missions--he's like a danger magnet; nobody else gets so much as a splinter. But there's just something different about him. John can't quite put his finger on it....

Calling Home by alchemy | 5.6K

“Send me up a drink,” jokes Major Hale. The count goes on.

A Wildness Warily Awakened by Etharei | 64.5K | Explicit

Derek Hale and his Specialized Combat Agents Unit are assigned to B-CON Base, a research facility in the heart of the lone human settlement on planet Cali. Normally, such an isolated place would not warrant the presence of Specs - the Infection is raging across the known galaxy, after all, and zombies don’t kill themselves (unless there are no tastier alternatives at hand) - but Derek is on a private hunt for his sister. He soon discovers that the rest of his team have ties to the place as well.

It’s all just coincidence, of course. (No matter what Stiles bleats on about those.)

Also, zombies.

Show You What All That Howl Is For by skoosiepants | 14.6K

“This is a terrible idea,” Stiles tells the room again. “You’ll all be sorry when Derek pushes me off a cliff.”

you're the only north star (dear god) | 5.8K | Mature

"I will go to the ends of the known universe, I will dive through a fucking black hole, I will walk unarmed with my hands tied into the Nemeton if it means getting him back," Derek says lowly. "But I can't do that if I haven't slept for eight days, and I can't sleep without Stiles."

The Space Between Us by isthatbloodonhisshirt (wasterella) | 30.4K

“Dude! Don’t open!” Stiles yelled almost hysterically, facing the console and kicking a panel again. “They’re gonna fucking kill me! They’re gonna think I killed this dude!” He motioned the figure lying dead on the floor.

There was a clang behind him and Stiles jerked to his feet, scrambling backwards and hitting the console, eyes locked on the entrance.

A tall, humanoid figure stepped through, aqua blue eyes rising and locking on Stiles before shifting to the dead alien on the floor.

Stiles’ heart thundered in his chest and he was positive he was about to fucking die.

Tore a Line in the Sun by stilinski | 44.9K

"If you're watching this, you're probably some kind of sentient life form responding to my distress call – well, it's not really an official distress call because, well, the hardware for that is kind of crushed, but I'm definitely in distress, so that should probably count for something."

The young man on the screen sighs and rubs his face, jerking his hand away with a hiss. He's bleeding, Derek realises: there's a gash across his brow and the knuckles of both hands are bruised and bloody, and that's only what he can make out between the cracks in the glass and the frame of the camera.

Space Pirate Samba by Rawren (Deshonanana) | 8K

That awkward moment when your fiance comes back from the dead as a space pirate trying to rob you and your sister's ship.

Just Glide by BewareTheIdes15 | 3.8K | Explicit

When he finally lays eyes on Hale, Stiles is hovering upside down over the pilot console - which, thank god, is emitting a steady, soft light that says good things about its potential operating condition. The perspective screws with him a little, and Stiles has only got three weeks of basic medic training under his belt to begin with, but he's pretty sure that the glazed look in Hale's drooping eyes and the smear of red on the skin showing around the edges of his helmet are bad news

Specialized Technical Intelligence and Logistics for Earth and Space (S.T.I.L.E.S) by Yiichi | 73.4K

“What the hell kind of a name is Stiles?” he asked.

“You know, a series of sounds spoken in a particular sequence that represent my identity, primarily, referring to me?“ the AI – Stiles – answered cheekily, crossing his own arms in front of his chest, mirroring Derek’s position.

“Ooh, this one’s feisty,” Peter smirked.

Take My Love by rosepetals42 | 7.3K | Explicit

A Firefly AU in which Derek is the captain of an old Firefly ship and Stiles is a Companion who is a bit late on paying the rent for his shuttle... Of course, Derek doesn't care about the money. Hasn't for a long time. (Crew doesn't pay rent.) Not that he can tell Stiles that.

Friends in High Places by avocadomoon | 3.5K

"What could you possibly say to me," Derek asks, "that would be regretful?"

only way to be sure by kellifer_fic | 14.6K

Derek might hate stasis but he loves combat drops.

#asks #sterek fics #ficrecs #space au #space pirates #lilassparks #stargate au

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everyhowlmarksthedead · 4 years

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LOSE TO WIN.

Che “Taza” Romero x reader

Anon asked: Hey! Could you do a Taza x Reader, where he is kind of quiet around the reader after what happened to Riz and the reader somehow understand what he have done and she confronts him, but she says that she still loves him anyway?

Word Count: 2.4k

Thanks to my lovely beta reader @chibsytelford 💘

Author Comments: As I explained, this is kinda painful to me. I've never been so in love with a TV show, nor with a character as I am with Riz. This imagine is somewhat random, writed in first person as I think I would have lived it, more or less. So, take it as it's a piece of me and enjoy. Gif credit: @angels-reyes.

Tag list: @starrynite7114 @chibsytelford @dazzledamazon @mara-mpou @sammskellington @gemini0410 @1-800-imagines @briana-mishell24 @sassymox @whyisgmora @aquamento @sadeyesgf @viviansafizada @samcro-jnt @jade770 @losolvidad0s @arved ✨ (if you wanna be tagged, send me a message!)

I’ve held his hand, since the doctors said that we could see him. I was constantly sitting by the left side of the bed, with my fingers tangled with his. And every time it came somewhat cold, I grabbed it with mine to raised it so I could give it some warmth with my breath. The surgery was good, better than expected, but I was unable to leave him for a single second. I didn’t even notice who more was in the room with me, I was so focused and so obsessed controlling his breathing, that the time was something relative. And I’ll blame myself all my life for leaving him alone the moment he stopped fighting. Yes, Taza was with him, but I wasn’t. He stopped fighting when I was no longer there. It was just a minute. A hallway. I was falling asleep and I needed a coffee. When I came back, his soul was already gone and so did a piece of my heart. Che held me before I could even fall, after the doctors said his lungs had failed. Taza has always been my anchor, since I met him when I was almost twelve years old, but he couldn't even keep me from sinking.

━━━━━━ ﹅ ━━━━━━

I was sitting outside of the clubhouse in a picnic table. There was no noise more than some crickets grilling. I was wearing his kutte without believing that he wasn’t gonna appear with his bike, complaining about whatever shit he saw on the road, before hugging me as he used to do. Raising my eyes to the sky and having a sip of my beer, I couldn't help but thinking about the first time I saw him. It was nine years ago at Stockton, when my uncle decided to open a new Mayans’ subsidiary. The southern Cali at Santo Padre. Marcus made somewhat like a party to celebrate with the Sons of Anarchy and my father brought me there. I was sitting alone, just like I’m right now. I was almost twenty years old and I didn’t know half the shit I know now. Yes, I wasn’t stupid. The motorbikes, the guns, the travels. I didn’t need to be a genius to know what my family used to do. A mexican with short and black hair sat next to me, offering me a tequila shot to greet with him.

“Por la familia”. (For the family). He said before drinking his, so I did. “I’m Michael, but everyone calls me ‘Riz’”.

“Well, everyone calls me ‘shit, kid, you did it again?’

He laughed with some kind of naturality and purity that I’ve never heard it before. It was a warm and nearby laugh, as my father’s. I don’t even know how I can explain it. It something that you really need to hear to feel it as I did. He was my first friend, because he wanted, and not because he was scared of who my family was. Through the years he became my family too. We spent a lot of time together, doing everything or doing nothing. Not even our silences were uncomfortable, we enjoyed each other's company, without more. It’s been just one day and I kept looking my phone, waiting for a call or a text that woke me up of this nightmare. But the only thing that pushed me back to reality it was the crew’s motorbikes roaring full of rage. I practically jumped off of the table, throwing away the beer before my father could lead the march. The main door was closed and they were waiting for me to open it, standing there with my arms crossed on the chest.

“I’m going”. I was determined like never in my life and no one would change my mind.

“Open the door and stay here”. My father just said.

“I’m going”. In case he didn’t hear me, I repeated it.

“It’s a risk I’m not gonna take. Don’t argue with m—”.

“He lost a battle ‘cause ‘Los Vatos. And I’m gonna defend his honor at war!” I interrupted him, yelling at my father as I never did it before. I had too much contained inside me, squeezing my heart till make me cry blood tears. “You can’t… put me aside, dad. Not tonight”.

My father shook his head sighing and rubbing his face, after some seconds seeming thoughtful, before finally nodding. I looked at the rest of the faces, they agreed too. Riz was my family, and he will always be even if his body isn’t present. So I ran to his motorbike, taking off the keys from the chest’ pocket. I had ridden it before but that time, when I turned on the engine, was pretty different.

━━━━━━ ﹅ ━━━━━━

It’s been a month since the funeral and sometimes looks like nothing had changed. Nothing but the way Taza used to treat me. He became somewhat cold, he turned away from me. Maybe I was so focused in my pain, that I didn't see his. I tried hard to talk with him, wanting to know how he felt, but he never did it back. No answer at any question I made. And I was falling into a black hole, into a loop. I wasn't capable of getting up from bed some mornings and I needed him as never before. I really needed him. Taza was always by my side, at the bad and at the good. But now, he was like a ghost. Running away from me. It was like if another piece of my heart was breaking. Till I had the enough strength to stop it, when my father told me that Che was leaving the Mayans. I lost Riz. So losing him too wasn't an option.

I drove the road to the ranch by heart, in the cold darkness of the night. I was decided to bring him back by my side and I didn't care what it might cost me. I was, and I am, surrounded by people that loved me without any doubt but no one like him. He taught me many of the things I know today. He covered me every time I fucked up things. He picked me up every night I called him drunk, being afraid of going home so my father could see me in that kind of condition. He cleaned my tears and cheered my smiles. I took care of his wounds, of his doubts, of his fears. I took care of his house and his car. I took care of him whenever he was sick or lost. We were made for each other. Again, losing him it wasn't an option.

Turning off my motorbike and taking off the helmet to leave it over the leather seat, I walked straight to the front red door. The light outside, in the porch, was on so he was at home. I had a copy of the keys, but I didn't want to burden him. After knocking the door with the knuckles, I waited there for some long minutes. It was cold outside and I started to freeze, when I called again using the door-bell. I could hear his steps coming, stopping for some seconds on the other side.

“Please, don' leave me”. I begged, knowing that he didn't want to let me in for some reason I couldn't understand, containing the tears that were claiming to fall down. “I'm sorry. I'm sorry for closing myself, for not talking to you at the beginning. I know I don' have any excuse, that I can't simply say ‘I did it with everyone’, 'cause you know you're not in that bag. You've been always the exception that proves the rule. And I love you, Che... You know that I do”.

It was the first time I said that. To him. I didn't say that to anyone that it wasn't my father, nor my uncle. But I really felt that shit. The same one that was taking away what little life I had left. When the door got opened, my heart jumped raising my eyes to the reddened ones. He look as bad as I was. I couldn't help but hugging him, surrounding him with my arms, while he was pushing me inside the house so he could close the door. I've never been a lot of affective, always respecting my own personal space. But with him was different. His arms around me were like a indestructible fortress, protecting me from the world and its evil. He was the air I needed to breathe whenever I felt I was drowning myself. And sometimes, this fact was a problem.

“This is my fault”. He whispered with his voice breaking somewhat more as he uttered each word.

“No, it wasn't, Che. It wasn't. They did wrong every thing they considered it was well done”. I tried to comfort him. I didn't know why he was blaming himself. Riz stopped his shots. Is what I have would done. And that wasn't his fault either.

“You don' understand… Riz is dead because of me”.

“No, it's not!” I was nervous, out of me, pulling him away so I could be able to support his cheeks between my hands. Seeing him cry like a heartbroken child was more painful that I could imagine, oppressing my chest as I was thinking that I never asked how he was.

“His lungs… His lungs didn't failed because of the shots, but because of me”.

My hands fell down, as my eyes got opened more than normally. Twisting my head like a dog does when he's confused, I walked a few steps back. Taza rested his body against the closest wall, crawling down till finding the floor with his knees curled to his chest. He was crying desperately, unable to look at me. Then I started to think about that night. No. It wasn't a coincidence that Riz and him were alone when he left us. I couldn't believe it. I couldn't believe that that poisoned words were true. Everything was crumbling around me, breaking with the same facility as a wet paper does between my fingers. The tears was running through my cheeks with my gaze on nowhere.

“Los Vatos… That trash should disappear, after all the damage he made to… innocent people that only wanted to have a better life”. He sob cleaning his eyes with a forearm. “I knew that your father wouldn't do anythin', and I knew that Riz was suffering… The surgery went well, but… doctors said that maybe he never could get out of the coma… He was my friend too. My br—brother. What could I do?”

Even if I wanted to punch him till death, I couldn't help but see the sense of his words. I was feeling his pain, his grief, his misery. I was so stubborn trying to save Riz, that I forgot him. He was carrying it over his shoulders all this time. And, no. He hadn't any excuse. He killed Michael. He never gave the benefit of the doubt. And it was dolorous when I found myself being unable to hate him.

“How you feel is my fault... Because of me. Because I didn't think in Riz, neither in you. I couldn' look you in… the face. So I thought it could be easy pull you away. Leave Santo Padre and come back to Arizona. But I can't… Shit… I can't”. He turned towards me, with his head supported against the wall. “Tell me you love me again… please”.

The anxiety was consuming me like a thick liquid clotting my blood, flooding my throat, my lungs, my stomach. It was like I was dying slowly, because I still loved him. Knowing that he killed my best friend, I still loved him. Unconditionally. I walked next to him, even if my brain was not sending any command to my legs, nor my body in general. I knelt down. In front of him. And I kissed him. Feeling like Judas, betraying Riz, I kissed him. Taza wasn't expecting it, neither did I. It was confusing. Every inch of my skin bristling as his tears met mine on our dry lips. When he gave me some space between his legs, surrounding me with his arms, it was like I forgot how to kiss, how to breath, how to live. Again without being conscious, my hands went to his nape. I just wanted to feel him close to me, almost lying on him, falling apart because of his fault.

“Tell me you love me again”. He begged me hopeless with his hands on my neck, keeping my gaze with the same darkness in them.

Life isn't fair. When you're part of something like Mayans, yes, everything at the end is about family, but sometimes there are collateral damage that you, nor anyone can't avoid. And that was Riz became. Sometimes you have to lose to win. A part of myself, to end human trafficking. And even if I wanted to hate him with all my efforts, I couldn't. And that made me hate myself so much. But I was seeing why he did it. It was a payback that, sooner or later, had to happen.

“I do”. I just said. “I love you, Che”.

His cry got louder with his forehead on mine when he heard me. I knew that he was suffering more than anyone around us and I had to save him, of one way or another, so that Riz wouldn't have died in vain.

“But you can't go”. I sat down between his legs, holding him as he was doing with his face sinked in my neck and one of my hands on his head. My fingers got tangled in his hair, pushing him somewhat closer. The agony was oppressing us, knowing that we should live with that secret anchored in our hearts. But, what else we could do? Keep fighting for a cause. “Stay with me. We have so much road to ride. Don' let Michael die for anything”.

“I'm so sorry”. He said with all the sincerity I could felt in him.

“I know. But we're together, you hear me?”

#mayans mc #mayans mc x reader #mayans mc imagine #mayans x reader #che taza romero x reader #taza romero x reader #taza romero #taza romero imagine #michael riz ariza x reader #riz ariza #michael riz ariza #riz ariza x reader

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themarcusmoreno · 4 years

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I told @opheliaelysia that I would elaborate on my connections to the Pedro Universe™️ characters and I am a woman of my word. So buckle in babes, we getting a little deep. I also want to tag @rzrcrst, @stevieharrrr and @callingmrsbarnes for their opinions.

Let’s start with Ezra: Okay, so. We aren’t really given a lot of his history or a really in depth peek at his personality but we got a good enough glimpse that I feel that we got to see that even if his morals be dubious, he had them. We got to see him go from almost shooting this teenage girl to trusting this complete stranger to save his life. I think we see that he wants to do good but something always comes up that causes him to resort back to his dubious ways. I guess the reason I kind of felt a connection to this character is because in all honesty, in my opinion anyway, Ezra is a loner, or at least to an extent he is. Sure he had his partner but they didn’t carry much conversation and we all know Ezra enjoys talking, who can blame him with a vocabulary that vast. Back to the loner bit, I say that in the sense that he gave me the vibe of being a man who’s always kinda had a crowd but prefers the luxury of being alone too and that’s how I am too. I can be around people, I can carry on conversation but I genuinely enjoy being alone. I feel like Ezra, I’m just trying to find a place in the world that suits me and my likes/dislikes. I enjoy the simpler things and can appreciate the beauty around me which is something I think Ezra does too. I mean.. look at that man and the way he talks and tell me he wouldn’t pen poems about the beauty of the green while also hating it. Basically, I vibe with my dubious space cowboy because I too am a creature of comfort with an old soul.

Now for Javier Peña, let me preface this by saying that I speak for the way Pedro played this person and not the real life counterpart: Javier, oh Javier. I don’t even know where to start besides I see him with a lot of anger and frustration, not even at things within his control because we see how things outside of his control frustrate him just as much. Javi is a man who is passionate and determined to get shit done and if the way he nearly threw his whole career away to catch Pablo wasn’t proof enough of that then I don’t know what is. I mean he basically (spoilers ahead) turned face on the whole of the Cali cartel and basically said fuck you to the US government. Javi also has a commitment issues, see his numerous hook ups and the thing with Lorraine. I’m not saying it in a completely negative way because he does have affection for people and tries to make connections but I think his line of work and his own self doubts of his worth as partner kind of fog his mind which is understandable for who Javi is. He is a grump but he’s also passionate, like I said above. As much as he may dislike his job at times I feel like he still goes above and well beyond what he has to because he wants people to be safe. As for my connection to this character, I am someone who is passionate (I mean I’m a double scorpio so it’s like in my blood basically haha). I either love hard or hate with a vengeance, there’s not much in between. I felt a connection to Javi because I am one to love and love hard but I can have a mean streak if you hit me the wrong way. I’m a double scorpio, like states above, so that basically spells extra passionate which is a storm in itself, and if Javi isn’t a storm crashing on a distant shore then who is? He has a lot of inner turmoil and I feel that. He wants so badly to do what’s right that he starts doing what’s wrong and while I’ve never fucked an informant or turned my back on the government (even if I want to bc no one would blame me tbh) I would do what I could for people I care about, definitely go above and beyond within legal reasons...well maybe illegal, wouldn’t be thr first time I’ve done something questionable for people I care about. ANYWAY for Javi the connection to him was his emotions, how passionate he is and the commitment issues he has.

Now Frankie: My precious, baby boy. I have a lot of feelings about Frankie even with the lack of set up we had for his character besides a few throw away lines. Coke? A new baby? Why wasn’t that discussed more? I’m looking at you Netflix, ya gave me nothing on Francisco and I still feel a connection with him. FOCUS ASH! Okay so, I think you get enough on Frankie that you can somewhat see that he’s the brains of whatever operation those men had. He had at least a decent form of moral compass, aside the coke thing. Anyway, I think with Frankie you see that he’s the quiet, more reserved of the group but that’s not to say that when he does eventually speak that he doesn’t have something to say. I think when he speaks, he speaks with purpose. Frankie has a lot more going on under the surface than we got to see and that’s sad. I want to talk about the coke thing really quick because this is my headcanon on it: I think that cocaine was something Frankie got into when he was in college, maybe even in flight school. I could see it being something he used to keep him up for exams and shit once he got a taste for it. Maybe he would’ve been hot and cold with his addictions like maybe he stopped to get into flight school but once he’s was in and licensed, I see him using it to stay awake during flights and such. Now with that being said, I can’t really pinpoint a certain thing that connects me to Frankie. I just see him and I immediately think home. Not in an obsession way, he is just a character that seems real to me. Realer than Javi, Ezra and even Din. Like he had real problems that caused he to go to an extreme, it had bad consequences it he did it. He knew it was risky and still did it, and I’ve been there. I’ve done a few things that weren’t quite legal, I dabbled in things that shouldn’t of happen but I did them, do I regret them? Yes. Would I do them again? No, definitely not. We learn from our mistakes and I think that Frankie learned the hard way along the way, I connect with that.

Din, now for Din: Listen, I have a lot of emotions about Mando (not as strong as @drakecaggiula91 but still). Din/Mando is definitely more complex than we got a glimpse of. I will say that besides Javi, he got more development than Ezra and Frankie. For Din/Mando he was a man with a plan, however bad that plan may be. He’s career focused and to me he’s seeking fulfillment in a job that he doesn’t entirely enjoy. Not to say he ain’t good at it, he is but I don’t think he enjoys it besides being able to provide for his clan and the foundlings. He’s definitely a man that lets few in but I feel like we see him opening up more as the season ended, he’s got trust issues but I think that’s normal after what he’s been through. He’s determined, he cares and he knows how show that in little actions because he’s not good with words. He talks but he’s more of an action guy. So how do I connect to our beloved Mandalorian? Trust issues, that old demon that loves to show up. Like Din/Mando, I have trouble letting people in because others have hurt me. I mean he thought he could trust his old team/crew and look where that got him, it takes a lot to earn his trust and I vibe with that. I’ve learned to not trust as easy or when I do and it goes south, I blame myself. I feel like Din/Mando has that same internal battle and that’s just something that makes him more relatable. I mean I too would take on a galaxy for someone I truly cared about but I’m obviously not a mandalorian. I just feel like for Din/Mando my connection is in the way he trust, the way he shows his affections in little actions. I’m better at words than Din/Mando but I love showing my feelings in little actions.

Wow.. okay. So this wasn’t suppose to be this long but I got into my emotions and realized maybe I love these characters more than I thought. Anyway, thank you for reading and I’m sorry it’s so long.

#long post #ash writes #ezra #javier peña #frankie morales #francisco 'catfish' morales #francisco morales #din djarin #the mandalorian #pedro universe™️ characters #wow i am a loser

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therealcalicali · 5 years

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Hi Cali hope your day is going terrifically😄 & congrats on the new internship! Is film production what you are studying in school? Its amazing you are able to still write amazing stories and do school/internships because Im sure its very time consuming, so I appreciate the dedication and you sharing your talent!

Hey!!!! I hope your day is going great as well. 🌴❤🌴

To answer you question, I'm a Screenwriting major. I'm super obsessed with film and tv production so I jumped at the chance to work at the Production Company.

I was fortunate that I got the position through my old professor. He has a friend, who has a friend. LMAO. You know how those things work.

I'm learning all aspects of production so that I can be fully rounded. Every woman I've met and my male mentors say that it's important. Because women aren't given allot of opportunities behind the camera.

And when they are, they have to be ready to tell people how they want things done. If not, people will take over your vision.

What's more, behind the camera is also where all the money 💰 is.

As an Actresss, you can be hot today and gone tomorrow. I was given the chance to persue it by a female agent who saw me at the bank a while back.

I went to the acting classes that her agency paid for but quickly realized I didn't like the stuff that goes along with being an Actress.

Besides being naturally introverted, I'm also very headstrong and couldn't smile at some of the nonsense. Not everyone is a creep but there's enough to make you roll your eyes. There are also allot of sexists and bigots. Trust me, Terry Crews and the others are not exaggerating.😒

Writers on the other hand control their own destiny. And you only need one hit to become a millionaire overnight.

Trust me, no one's firing J.J. Abrams, George R.R. Martin, Guillermo del toro, etc.😂 They generate the franchises so they have all the power.

Interestingly, most male writers also know directing, producing, cinematography, or another crucial technical skill. So it's important that we women do as well.

#answered asks #answers #answered

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egseven-blog · 5 years

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About The Author

I just turned 30 years old this year, which has thrown me into a further existential crisis. Not that i needed any help with that. Let us not start in 2019 though my friend. Jump into a time machine with me and let us go back to the early 90’s. The golden age of the modern world. Where I was inspired to become the writer I am now.

The first form of entertainment I can remember falling in love with was THE EMPIRE STRIKES BACK.That movie changed my life. I grew obsessed with Star Wars in full. Its rich lore, ideas of good and evil, even story. I sketched as a kid, so I drew lightsabers and made up my own characters. My mom started buying me Star Wars books that took me almost no time to read. Soon after, I discovered the world of video games. I played Super Nintendo a lot, but didn’t catch my addiction until I was given a grey brick Gameboy. Then there was the alternate dimension known as Japanese anime. From Akira to Princess Monokoke. Don’t get me started with Dragonball z.

I was still a growing sketch artist. I even started drawing a comic book instead of school work at school. That is until my 6th grade english class. The teacher told us to make a short story. Something in me woke up after being given this assignment. I cant explain it. It was like I was hearing a voice calling to me in the reaches of deep space. So I wrote a short story. I cant remember what it was called, but it was about a young man helping a mermaid while trying to hide her from his pirate crew. It was okay I guess. I slowly began a habit of writing after that. The same year 9/11 happend. I witnessed it on some news channel in that same english class. I still cant believe we were allowed to watch it.

My family moved to Louisville, Ky that year from Elizabeth Town. I was in the 7th grade and was given another writing assignment. Write a poem. Again I heard that voice. But now it was louder. Thinking back on it now, I realize that 9/11 hit me harder than I thought. My poem was about a soldier surviving a war. My teacher approached me after we turned them in. I thought I was in trouble, but it turns out she wanted to use my poem as an example to show future classes. For all I know its still there, in that 7th grade class today.

Lets fast forward to high school where my puberty was on 10 all the time. I was starting to write more as well as draw. The two hobbies began to blend together. i was consuming books and shows and movies and comics at an accelerated rate. School wasn’t my thing though. i don’t think it was because i wasn’t smart or whatever. I think it was because it was boring. Because it is. Relationships with girls and a difficult home life made me write and draw a lot. In fact, I wrote poetry more often. Expressing my teenage angst. Before I was 18 I left home.

I started working, got a job and my own apartment. I worked at Mc Donalds in the bottom of a children’s hospital. Then got a second job working at a UPS warehouse. I ended dropping out of school my senior year. Had no intention of going back. That is until I realized that I was running out of gas at 19. Working 2 jobs to pay for an apartment I couldn’t afford. So I got a GED then showed up at a recruiting office with an afro and a fry smelling Mc D’s uniform. I ended up becoming an M1-A1 Abrams tank crewman. What I didn’t know was that I would be doing my basic training 30 minutes from where I had lived. Ft. Knox, Ky. The very place I was born. So my wait to get out and travel had been postponed.

While in basic training however, the voice of writing was now screaming. So, while training i wrote. i wrote letters home and plots, characters for stories. Basic was harsh. But I got through it. My first duty station was Ft.Irwin, California. Being from the south the state of California was mind blowing. The only thing that sucked was the base was located in the Mojave desert, 30 miles from civilization. It was there that I was able to afford to consume more media. Buy comics and books. Download anime and movies.Play video games when we weren’t training for 3 weeks a month, every month. I met a really good friend in Cali. He became like a brother to me. But before we could reenlist together he was killed in a car accident Super Bowl morning of 2010. I needed to get out of Cali. Out of America. So I reenlisted by myself for Korea.

Again i am a southern kid from Kentucky, so flying to another country was both frightening and amazing. The flight was 15 hours. I remember an elderly Korean woman asking me something in Korean and not knowing at all what she was saying. Camp Casey, Korea was a few miles south of the DMZ. It was in the center of a small exploited town called Dongducheon. Being an anime and kung fu movie fan, I loved it. Everything. The culture, the food, clothing. Koreans seemed to be a lot more passive than americans as well. It was nice. Seoul is basically an asian New York. It was always alive. I went to college while in Korea taking a language and culture class.It made things like traveling and really anything far easier. In Korea the voice was now stomping the writer in me. It was gnawing at my brain.

“Write!” the voice yelled.

So I did. I wrote 2 full books and several short stories while still in the army. One of which was my now published novella Revolutopia. As time went on the voice chose to exit the army for me. It wasn’t for me anymore. Especially seeing everything behind the scenes. Nah, I’m good. So I retired at 23. Moved back home and the voice made me self publish Revolutopia. I’ve written and published since then. That voice has only gotten louder since then. It wasn’t until recently that I realized what that voice was.

It was me. It was always me.

#writer #blogger #blog #writing #author #Selfpublished #writingcommunity

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sheusedtobesassier · 3 years

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Day 10,785

172 days until I hit my thirties.

So. An assortment of 172 good memories from my twenties.

001. Addey hype mumbo jumbo singing along with Moana before she was really talking.

002. Being asked to say the big thank you at SOE graduation.

003. Isaac’s face when he peeked at Omar’s new shoes at the East Towne Starbucks.

004. Drinking Mike’s honey moonshine while we played Euchre in his starry cicada humming backyard.

005. Taking Mama on the water taxi rides when she visited me in Chicago.

006. Grandma Kathy calling me, “My pink haired granddaughter.”

007. Sneaking into camp with the Hines girls to write up collaboration glass bottle poems in the Prayer Chapel.

008. The slow and steady hike up to the Hollywood sign.

009. The night I kidnapped Mini Farm kittens to snuggle for a movie and accidentally left the gate open releasing the rest to the Wisconsin wild.

010. Sunday afternoon sipping Stella Artois in the perfect sunny front room of our Albany Park apartment.

011. Zoë giving me all her wallet cash so I could buy bare minimum groceries.

012. Taking turns reading The History of Love aloud in our Winter Staff Forest Springs apartment.

013. The Halloween/Hillside round of Murder in the Dark with All Stars only.

014. Acting a fool in the unfinished Lodge room filled from floor to ceiling with Tempur-Pedic mattresses.

015. Doug lounging in the giant crate of laundry bags in the laundry room.

016. GUBS INSIDE JOKES.

017. St. Patrick’s Day 2021, hahaha.

018. Beyoncé: Lemonade in the empty downstairs apartment with Mary.

019. Accidentally getting kayak drunk from a backpack bottle of Ménage à Trois.

020. Daylight skinny dipping with Amber to inaugurate the new pool.

021. The perfect stray cat that came around the second half of 2018.

022. Renate being the first to cry with me post breakup. Bill supplying sparkling water to prevent dehydration.

023. Doing drag makeup in Bekah’s bathroom while her and Marissa giggled at each other in the tub.

024. Every kitchen island conversation I’ve ever had with Steve Hines.

025. The perfect colors the night we snuck up on the helicopter landing pad on that Dallas hotel.

026. FACILITATING THAT SAME WEEKEND’S GAME OF ASSASSIN, BEFORE IT GOT UGLY.

027. Becoming buddies with all four Williams brothers.

028. When Mercy told me I’m her favorite Williams brother.

029. Hahaha the Camp Clean Up I put Elliot on my crew for my own amusement and told him his only responsibility was to walk around with me the whole time.

030. The time Blaine and I were avoiding the long lunch line together and Nimanim was like, “Wait so this is like an actual friendship huh?”

031. Tanner enthusiastically reenacting Gandalf’s YOU SHALL NOT PASS as I came up the path.

032. Will realizing I’d Facebook stalked him without sending a friend request.

033. Magically finding Pop Rocks the morning of my perfect 22nd birthday.

034. My perfect 26th birthday weekend in Minneapolis with my dreamy local girl gang.

035. Tauri’s blossoms on the Sky Lodge trees in the spring.

036. Encountering and becoming completely enthralled by the Enneagram.

037. OLIVIA FUCKING GATWOOD APPRECIATING MY PINK HAIR.

038. Clementine von Radic writing that Greyhound always loses her luggage too.

039. My stretch of obsession with Hemingway’s love interests.

040. Becoming friends with Fat Boy Tucker pup.

041. Becoming friends with rescued best dog Star girl.

042. The night Doug was my ride from the airport and he pulled his truck over so we could take a good look at the gigantic moon.

043. That hilarious flirtatious moonlight wander of the horse trails with Omar and Edith and Caleb.

044. Jake Nelson giving me a surprise scoop of chocolate custard as a peace offering after his grumpy bedtime attitude.

045. THE DISCOVERY AND CAPTIVATION OF HADESTOWN.

046. Getting to have Alia in every day for a while there.

047. Les Mis at Overture Center because Ally bought our family tickets.

048. Pat Coakley telling me I don’t know how special I am.

049. Spit handshake with Janelle swearing we’ll never think any boys are cooler than we are.

050. Marissa picking me up without explanation to take us on a quiet sunset drive of her favorite county road.

051. Jayden imagination playing with Blue, Guy, and a motorcycle for a whole night then waking me up with them the next morning.

052. Genevieve asking to borrow my lavender romper for her rehearsal dinner.

053. Getting to be Cali’s sidekick the week leading up to her wedding extravaganza.

054. Houston YMCA hallway phone call from Justin’s dorm room asking me clarify which of the boys was Nick, Schmidt, and Winston.

055. The absolutely ludicrous old woman I got drunk with in the Amtrak dining car.

056. The absolute ludicrous glass skull light up cocktail I drank at Freehand’s hotel bar.

057. When Dan Hartke told me I’m a mother hen.

058. When the most beautiful Sora from Korea told me, “You always flowers.”

059. Hannah’s hand me down Steve Madden sandals.

060. Runaway trips with Amber Bamber to watch Shakespeare in the woods.

061. Storytelling with Jack Thomas.

062. Drunk bar darts after Corn Fest with Marissa’s gang.

063. Leaving the reception with Emmy to go curl up in Amber’s bed and giggle about how it was the last place she slept as a virgin.

064. The night Riana and Zoe and I took turns putting our heads out the car windows to howl like wolves.

065. Falling asleep on the couch with Zelina and Chelle beer buzzed watching Jersey Shore.

066. That perfect little basement Thai place a couple blocks from Emmy’s apartment dorm.

067. When Dan forced me to get out of his car and left because I’d annoyed him too hard on our library trip.

068. Vicki suggesting we go live together overseas.

069. Depop photoshoot with Taurilyn.

070. Mykenza bluntly declaring true things I couldn’t confirm or deny.

071. Norm announcing to the full room he was teaching that I was a rascal.

072. Zochella.

073. Noah Gundersen and Brett Dennen at The Majestic.

074. Every damn time we ate beautiful food at High Rock Cafe.

075. The nights I felt capable at TOCHI.

076. LENA DUNHAM’S GIRLS.

077. Jordan suddenly ballroom dancing Genevieve around the kitchen.

078. Staying up late crying to my mom about trying to take good care of the lesbian teenagers at Sky Lodge.

079. The night Caleb very suddenly showed up with a bowl of sangria then tried to leave a dozen times but we convinced him to stay.

080. Rachel swearing that the man in the Wrigleyville bookshop had love at first sighted me.

081. Making the list of how many musicals I’ve been affected by.

082. Discovering weirdo La Llamada then driving straight to Carlsons’s to immediately watch it again with them.

083. Writing heartfelt correspondence back and forth with Kat for a few years.

084. All the funky cards I’ve received from Amber.

085. Finding that PERFECT dress at Goodwill for Tauri’s Winter Ball.

086. An actual friendship with Paul Bierdeman.

087. COUNSELOR MEETINGS.

088. The night Emily Holverson and I stood outside the Lodge trading sincerity about Sky Lodge and the complications of ministry.

089. Blunt conversations with Josiah, hahaha.

090. The Lower Lakeview round of Murder in the Dark when I killed every single person playing before anyone could call, “Dead body!”

091. When I suddenly caught him listening to my singing in the tunnel.

092. Putting together outfits from Lolita’s wardrobe.

093. Driving into such an unexpectedly lush part of Missouri.

094. A nighttime surprise of Big Ben and The London Eye and Buckingham Palace and St James Park in the falling snow.

095. MY PERFECT ABODE IN ST. LOUIS, MO.

096. OUR PERFECT ABODE IN ALBUQUERQUE, NM.

097. Becoming one of Steve’s best friends.

098. The evening Elorine and I didn’t go with and REALLY talked.

099. THE UNDENIABLE INHERENT GOODNESS OF MERRY’S KIDS.

100. Farrell’s crying apology on the sidewalk outside of Maple.

101. Alex’s irregular sudden extreme compliments.

102. The females I’m close with over the internet due to mutual admiration.

103. Lars from Hinge, hahaha.

104. Sitting at the end of a long table with Janelle making a napkin list of our all time favorite manic pixie dream girls.

105. The handful of LotR marathons we’ve accomplished.

106. When Kat told me she understood the Harry Styles crush but that maybe he wasn’t right for me.

107. Reading so many Donald Miller books and getting others to read them too.

108. Kisses on the cheek from Esther.

109. Getting raspberries for Mike’s turtles as an apology for making death threats.

110. Tipsy dancing alone with my eyes closed for like a hundred songs at Sheryl’s Club on New Years 2021.

111. The flattering comparison to the wonderful Harley Duke.

112. Aw omg, our happy hammock stacks at Observatory Hill.

113. Telling slumber party stories on stage for Women’s Retreat.

114. BEING THE MIME FOR LIFE GROUP’S FAVORITE.

115. Fatigued watching The Kissing Booth and laughing harder than ever.

116. Spastic goofing around with Ashley AND Brittany the day we moved Amber into her new home.

117. Sitting on my closet floor showing crying Riana baby videos of singing piano playing Janelle.

118. Giggle running through Piggly Wiggly parking lot at closing with Rene with like $400 of alcohol on Ally’s birthday.

119. Fireball shots ALL NIGHT with Jeremiah and his uncle on Christmas Eve.

120. Listening to the delicious details of Emmy’s Europe romance.

121. Zion giving me his Adidas crewneck as sentimental goodbye gift.

122. Arguing with Austin over our differing zombie apocalypse ideologies.

123. Drunk Discord/Among Us with Hunter and Bekah and Nick and Marissa.

124. How soft Kenny’s absurd speeches made my heart.

125. MINUTE LONG VOICE MEMOS STACKS WITH ROSIE. ♡♡

126. Listening to Lizzy McAlpine in an afternoon candlelight bath.

127. Listening through John Mayer’s The Search for Everything mowing the ball field.

128. Emotionally painting my old house in Birmingham.

129. Being really damn good at that Heads Up game with Omar.

130. Compiling worthwhile stuff for Foreman training.

131. GROWING MY PLANTS.

132. The stretch when Bryanna was usually wrapped in my blanket.

133. Talking about going to Colorado with Alex.

134. The notorious reputation of knowing everybody at CCCA.

135. GETTING ALL DRESSED UP FOR DINNER THEATER.

136. Calling Ally from a parking lot at Emmy’s bachelorette party because I was SO CONFIDENT I was a hot person that I had to talk to her about it.

137. Playing the stupidest laughingest game of The Floor Is Lava with Jackson when I came to visit them all in Dallas.

138. Feeling really really really at home in my apartment at Sky Lodge.

139. How Ryan Boon would struggle to talk through his laughter.

140. Belonging to myself at Fiddleheads Coffee in Cedarburg.

141. THE UNDENIABLE IMMEDIATE CHEMISTRY BETWEEN ME AND COURTNEY HART.

142. Big Falls County Park. Every time.

143. Kayaking down Blue River with Duke, Jeremiah and Addey, Hunter, and Hunter’s friend.

144. That perfect burger at Pier Burger in Santa Monica.

145. Riding The Brown Line down to The Loop and all the way back up.

146. Aw. Welp. Every lengthy truthful phone call with Sam.

147. The four seasons I was compiling four second videos.

148. Ashley’s and my perfect roommates stretch, featuring our perfect couch.

149. The night we forced so many to come to our Blackfish showing then sign our petition opposing Sea World. Hahaha. #emptythetanks

150. The night Ben and I sat in the corner giddy burning through TriBond cards.

151. The night I showed up at Doug’s and Lueck’s door losing my damn mind over The Dress.

152. Community Soccer at the local elementary school gym.

153. Frigid stranded in the Chequamegon National Forest with Mary and Caleb on our return drive from our nightmare trip to Duluth.

154. The final night of being “cats in a bag” sleeping in Janelle’s bottom bunk.

155. Filling up the broomball courts under a negative degrees meteor shower.

156. Getting another wonderful summertime of Delala.

157. The Sunday service the pastor wouldn’t quit snapping his fingers and a bunch of us were txting each other like, “OMFG NO AHHH HOW DO WE MAKE HIM STOP????”

158. Oomph. The perfect veggie omelette (no cheese) at Sparks.

159. Dad’s soft voicemail about his admiration for Adele.

160. Their neighbor lady Maddie’s outfit for the Christmas cantata and her disappointment with the unfamiliar song selection.

161. Raquel’s completely irresistible fun streak.

162. Listening to folklore with Jayden and the girlies first thing when I woke up every morning for a while there.

163. Going through Met Gala looks cuddled up with Omar.

164. The way it felt reading Anthropology of an American Girl.

165. The giant primary colors crochet blanket mom made for me.

166. Noah scooping me up in that hug in the Waterloo parsonage kitchen.

167. When Omar completely surprised me with what he can do to a piano.

168. Deciding I am a Pinot Grigio girl.

169. Omfg, the Nest Night we intensely debated our way through a Staff Wives wrestling bracket.

170. Dismantling multiple purity talks and dress codes like it’s my calling.

171. Laying on blankets in the middle of many fields in different places for the sake of being very very very very sunkissed.

172. Regularly running into Bill at Kwik Trip.

#personal

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hongism · 3 years

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MISS CALY I JUST FINISHED 38 AND I AM HERE WITH MY ESSAY 🤩 - 🦔

DAY 129482 OF ME SCREAMING ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE JONGHO AND MC’S RELATIONSHIP SOBS :(

PLS JOONG’S REACTION WHEN THEY BROUGHT WOO BACK :(((

“How dare Seonghwa look so gentle and confident even while being chained and held in the brig of his own ship?” CALY I AM GENUINELY CRYING WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS

HER DREAM OH MY GOD WHAT THE FUCK????? are those supposed to be alternate realities of what would’ve happened if jongho went to fight mingi instead of hongjoong????

JWEWJSH WHAT IS HAPPENING WHY IS SHE SEEING ALL THESE THINGS IN HER DREAMS

HWA AND JOONG DYING TOGETHER LIKE THAT????? WHAT WHAT WHAT WHAT WHAT

NOOOOOOOOOOO MC SEEING EVERYONE DIE EXCEPT SAN <////3 does this mean her greatest nightmare is not even losing him but him not remembering her???? <//////3 which echoes what he said to her in ch15?? 16?????? about not wanting to have no memory of her??????????? I AM PAIN

“I feel I might lose my mind if I cannot bring him back safely soon.” IS THIS FORESHADOWING OH MY GOD

noooooo her imagining the crew living peaceful ordinary lives :((((((((((((((((((((( i genuinely cried at that :(((

wait but yunho kind of has a point but also kind of doesn’t?????? i am big confusion bc he seems like he has the right idea but something else (maybe his personal feelings towards joong) is still holding him back from making a completely unbiased/unselfish judgment but i guess that’s humanity and no one can ever be 100% objective :((

has mc put down the name for the pardon papers yet? i’m not sure if she did or has already written hyunwoo’s but i’m sure it was mentioned????? ahsjhajs so many questions

JWJDHWJFUWJDJSJKS YUNHO HONGJOONG WHDJWHJSHQJDJWIE nothing like the devil’s tango to break up the Angst and Tension i suppose 😔😔😔😔

MOC HONGJOONG CHEST TATTOOS MOC HONGJOONG CHEST TATTOOS

HWA WANTED TO TELL JISUNG THAT HE IS A W H A T 👁👁 HWA BBY NO U CANT TELL THAT TRICK ASS MF >:(

“I just… want you to know you are loved today just as you were yesterday, and you’ll be loved tomorrow as well. Whatever kind of that love is, it’s love nonetheless. These people — the family you have built and chosen yourself — will continue to love you even if you get a little lost along the way.” I AM CRYING MOC SEONGHWA (and the rest of them minus jisung) DESERVES TO HEAR THIS AND NOTHING LESS :(((((

leave it to jisung to ruin everything as usual 😀😀😀😀😀🔨🔨🔨🔨🔨🔨🔨🔨 pls let me go and give him the hammer miss caly icb i wanted them to reunite before act five started now i want him gONE 😀😀😀

SAN BBY GET BEHIND ME :(((( WTF MOC JISUNG IS REALLY STARTING TO CREEP ME OUT SOMEONE DROP HIM OUT OF THE SHIP AND INTO SPACE PLS

SO IT REALLY WAS MC WHO SAID THAT U SEXC MF :’)))))) okay when i thought she was going psycho in this chapter i really thought it was gonna be batshit crazy psycho but this silent type of crazy is just as sexc 🤩

oop nvm but jisung deserved that so 😔😔 is it bad that i kinda wanted her to kill him

“Still, his tone holds far more softness than anger” 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 hajdhwjjdjsk not me going uwu over such a serious moment 🤡🤡 but v v obsessed with sexc captain joong 😔

HI IM BACK HERE AT LAST SO FUCKING LATE BUT HERE !!!! IM HEREEEEEEEE IM SORRY FOR THE DELAY DOFGIJDFOIGJOI LET ME SCREAM WITH YOU OKAY LET'S GOOOOO

FIRST OF ALL I DONT KNOW WHOSE FAULT IT IS BUT SOMEONE GOT ME SIMPING FOR JONGHO AND I HAVE NO CONTROL OVER MYSELF WHEN IT COMES TO WRITING HIM SO IF IT POPS OUT THEN IT POPS OUT AND I CANNOT STOP IT !! IM AT RISK!

i personally really adored the lil nuances to joong's reaction when they brought woo back i think it was v downplayed for purposeful reasons BUT also v underrated bc !!! UGH !!! jJUSTUISHiu yeah ;-;

PLS WHY ARE U CRYING ITS OKAY PLS

the DREAM areofigjodifjg are they alternate realities what are they hmm hmmh mhmhmhmhm mysterious mysterious im sorry i legit sobbed while writing the hwa and joong part that was so hard to get thru it hurt SO BAD and it wasn't even REAL just :') yeah :')

ur onto something there with her greatest nightmare I WONT SAY MORE but i'll just say ur onto something BIG !!!! and it does echo back to lots of their conversations from acts two and three !! T-T PAIN!

there's actually something V IMPORTANT TO NOTE about that line too the 'i feel i might lose my mind if i cannot bring him back safely soon' and it ties to yn's convo with jisung and the last line of the chapter as well 🥰

genuinely CRYING AT THE PEACEFUL LIVES PLS !!!! it was supposed to be a gentle moment no tears ;-;

yunho was very much playing the devil's advocate as well as acting on personal feelings himself since we've seen that tension between him and seonghwa before but it truly IS humanity, no one can be 100% objective without any bias and that's something that's hard to work around and work with ;-;

she has nOT put a name down on the pardon papers, for now it's just alluded to that she plans to put hyunwoo's name down ONE DAY but those papers will become important again sooooooooon

U KNOW I HAD TO DO IT smack smack tension breaker sexcie times i had to okay it was getting TOO INTENSE!!

MOC HONGJOONG CHEST TATTOOS MOC HONGJOONG CHEST TATTOOS MOC HONGJOONG CHEST TATTOOS MOC HONGJOONG CHEST TATTOOS you know i had to do it there too okay i couldn't resist

our DEAREST HWA DESERVES TO HEAR IT he needs the encouragement and love he NEEDS IT he truly deserves it too pls i cried there too ;-;

that's a LOT OF HAMMERS AND SMILES BLS UR SCARIER THAN JISUNG IS GOD DAMN i'll allow it u are welcome to take the hammer to his noggin oki oki u have my permission 😳

dONT WORRY SAN HAS HIS LOVELY LADY YN TO PROTECT HIM she'll DEFEND she PROTECC she ATTACC (and most important she love san bacc?)

OFC IT WAS MC WHO SAID IT HELL YEAH I WASNT TEASING THAT TIME silent crazy with an edge of psycho truly beautiful <3 jisung deserved the splat right then but sadly </3 he's still necessary </3

when joong pulls on the sexc captain pants 😫 if u liked that then i think u will ADORE the beginning scene of the next chapter <3

#moc: spoilers #mists of celeste #🦔 anon #anon #asks

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