Okay so hear me out: draco as a spy for the order.

He proves himself to the golden trio in fifth year, for reasons I have yet to explain but will figure out soon enough, and runs to Severus during the summer in between fifth and sixth year before he gets the dark mark. Snape calms him down and they figure out what draco wants to do moving forward and what would be the smartest thing to do while keeping his morals in tact. They figure out the spy solution.

So snape takes draco to the order and is like “he should be a spy” and everyone’s like “no 😠” at first but then dumbledore goes “yes 🤓” and everyone goes “yeah we were joking he can join our club 😁” (I’m being funny not serious. I am also seriously minimizing the amount of time all of this will take and the complexity of all of it, but follow along)

Does all of that make sense? You guys obviously can’t read my mind and have no idea what I’m going to do with the characters yet, but this solves a big plot hole that I was trying to figure out a way through.

in that stage of procrastination that I’m thinking about figuring out how Notion works

Sorry but I don’t get the hype about Peeta mellerk

Oh no. The horror. Guess I better abandon years worth of loving a character…

wip wednesday: going thru my corny arc

Condescending dickhead

society if the angel writers had committed to the part demon storyline:

thank fuck I didn’t end up in the “willingly accepts the copaganda of rwby because the fake catgirl told me to do it” club because each and every time some new person tries to stand up and preach to the world “the writers writing an organization of in universe minorities, led by a fridged desi woman, with members including an indigenous girl, two middle eastern-coded twins, and a jewish named ex slave with the initials of a german named company branded into his eye, thats ackshully ☝️🤓 just an evil bunch of reverse-racist TERRORIST ABUSERS who are ON THE LEVEL OF if not WORSE the racists OPPRESSING AND ENSLAVING THEM…… is actually good and subversive writing” I want to throw a cinder block at something I am so serious

Do you have specific fiction authors that you like to read? What aspects of a story make you want to really dig your fingers in it? Is it horror?

I’ve got a couple! Keigo Higashino for sure. anything Naoki Urasawa does: I will be reading it. Priest (Guardian and Mo Du are all time favorites). also KJ Charles and Andrew A Smith!

ngl I don’t really have a concrete list of favorite fiction writers, I spent several days thinking about this one: like, I have favorite books for sure, but I don’t often find myself considering an author to be a favorite just because their book blew my mind. I’ve only read three of Andrew A Smith’s works, but he’s here because he gave an interview years that changed my entire approach to storytelling, and I still revisit it whenever I start editing a story.

honestly the big thing is that I like character!! I like compelling characters (extremely varied definition of compelling, it doesn’t have to be much, but it does have to have something) I like it when something goes full throttle into whatever it wants to be. I’ll watch a slow paced slice of life romance with the same amount of enthusiasm that I had for Devil Judge, and the 1vs10 beat down in Ipman takes up just as much space in my brain as the ‘let’s not see each other from now on,’ breakup in the Heirs (but for extremely different reasons lmao)

however. if I have to pick something more thematically specific: I like seeing people in power get what they have coming to them, I like explorations and confrontations of political and social injustices. kingdom is one of my favorite shows, and the horror is great, but it was the political-class-power aspect of it that solidified it as a memorable watch to me. kamen rider build did something fundamental to the circuitry of my brain. etc.

My life the past couple years has mostly been made up of waiting for people in the car. Or driving people someplace. It kind of agonizes me to no end :(

Random art vent lol

I get tired of constantly pouring my heart out when asked about my stuff only for it to fall flat. Like why did they even ask me to begin with??? Just to tease me??? 😭 bruh

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quick indulging in some stede angst while i procrastinate on finishing my piece on e5

i’m consistently fucked up over the blacked out form that used to be stede in the family portrait, and the metaphor it provides about the way stede handled his life and trauma: everything’s pretend. he’s not truly there, he’s living a story in his head in ways both lovely and inadvertently cruel.

lovely: looking at the world and demanding it bend to his delusional belief things could ever be other than they are. that it could be better.

inadvertently cruel: leaving mary and the kids (leaving ed) to wonder: was it me? if i was better, if i had been kinder or a more supportive wife, a better behaved child or a co-captain with less baggage or a better man, would he have stayed? would i have been worth staying for?

stede’s got a whole basketful of reasons he leaves without explaining why in both cases. but he does leave, and he doesn’t explain: those actions ripple out and hurt the people he leaves.

but also, we know stede’s general self-worth is under the fucking ground!!! less than zero!!! he has absolutely no inkling that his absence might affect someone just as much as his presence. he thinks: i am a burden people suffer. when i remove myself from their lives, i am ultimately making those lives easier, in heartbreaking part because he cannot imagine a world in which somebody actually wants him around.

i know i’m a big old hippie and a reconciliation will come faster than we might think truther, but goddamn i just want ed and stede to have the mutual validation moment! because ed needs to hear “it was never about not wanting you or not wanting to be with you, it was a gross cocktail of trauma and old fears and chauncey being a walking nightmare in so, so many ways” from stede and stede needs to hear “you leaving me? fucked me up real good in ways we may need to do some work to overcome, but only because you are somebody i always want to be around, even when things are not pleasant and conflict-free, all forever-like” from ed asa-fucking-p.

Hello! Are you also a fellow Troper?

i was a lot more active on there as a teenager but yeah i still pop in to edit some stuff every now and then. i think the last page i did some cleanup for was the one for be kind, my neighbor (novel is 18+ for anyone trying not to get Penis Mention Jumpscared.) i don’t know if i’d actually have time to edit any of the welcome home articles on there, though.

I love wasting 20 minutes responding to a post, only to find I’m blocked.

Anyway. Here’s the brief version.

Why Sysmed is Transphobic:

Sysmed is often used against trans systems as a form of insult because they’re medicalizing their own fucking disorders. Sysmed is also used as an insult against people who are genuinely confused. It’s also used as an insult against people who are straight up just telling facts about DID!!

The term itself is being used against disordered people to compare them talking about their disorders to how people talk about gender. That is super fucked up!

The thing I always see is “it’s comparing how sysmeds medicalize plurality, just like transmeds medicalize transgender people!” And that is well and good. But it’s not being used that way! It is being used against pro-endos who talk about facts about DID. It’s used against people like me, who criticize the online endogenic community while fully believing in their non-medical experiences. It’s used against people who literally are just existing with a severe, childhood-trauma based disorder.

Here’s my question for y’all who use sysmed.

Why the fuck can’t you just use a different word for your insults? Like. Genuinely, why did it have to be the word that you use to directly compare me talking about my disorder to how I experience gender? Why is sysmed so fucking vital for you? Why can’t you just fucking let it go.

They’re anti endos. That’s it. Or better yet - just call them a fucking asshole and move on like the rest of us do!!!

FUCK ME😭😭😭

I was writing the ending to the story and made some really good edits when THE APP SHUT DOWN AND DIDNT LET ME SAVE MY WORK