#I’m just sick and tired okay
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what if we get a scene that parallels the moonlight scene in s1ep5. like, ed and stede are in a similar spot where they’re looking at each other from across the way, longing for each other, yearning for each other’s touch and affection. so they’re once again stuck for a few beats looking like this—
but instead of parting ways again, something in them breaks, and they run back to each other to grab hold of what’s hanging in the air between them. they run back to see through what was started, but never finished.
they run back to deeply kiss each other.
#OFMD#Gentlebeard#Blackbonnet#Edward Teach#Stede Bonnet#Revenge Rambles#To the surprise of NO ONE#A gif set gave me brainworms#And ALSO to the surprise of no one#IM BACK ON MY s2 KISSING NONSENSE DKSNDNWND#I’m just sick and tired okay#I just want to see them kiss again so so bad#’Jodi why don’t you just officially start writing and subsequently play with them like dolls and make that happen’#shhh that would make Too Much Sense <3 EKDJSJD#That would require me as a writer actually sitting down and writing??? :/#SO FOR THE TIME BEING#SPECULATIVE TUNGLE POSTS IT IS SKDNWNDN
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I want to talk a little bit about Hawai‘i, because I have been thinking a lot about my people, and our lives.
The year 2023 marks 130 years since the illegal overthrow of the Hawaiian Kingdom.
On January 17th 1893, American businessman used their connections and military influence to dethrone Queen Liliuokalani by threat of force.
This annexation still impacts my people 130 years later. It still hurts us, it still haunts us,
For the last 130 years my people have suffered under America’s cruelty and indifference.
Unsustainable Tourism haunts us, causing a cost of living crisis, which turns into a rise in poverty, which turns into a rise in individuals experiencing homelessness. This cost crisis disproportionately effects my people, Kānaka Maoli. We cannot even afford to live on our on land. Our ancestral home.
And in turn, tourism then provides the most jobs. This industry pushes us off our land and into poverty, and then it turns around and sells us back our culture as a walking joke.
Our very identity is turned into entertainment. Our very culture is turned into entertainment.
And many of my people have no choice but to sell their culture so they can eat, so they can survive.
We have been put in a never ending cycle of misery and cultural destruction.
In addition, Military Involvement on our islands causes repeated incidents of ecological violence, and land disputes. The military take claim to land that belongs to my people, and they spill chemicals over and over, and poison the water we drink.
My people are suffering. Our culture is suffering.
And everyday more tourists come. Everyday more land is taken to build hotels. Everyday more culture is stripped and bastardized. Everyday more land is taken for military use.
I’m so tired of living this way. I’m so tired of waking up and watching the slow and agonizing death of my people.
I want us to live. I want us to thrive.
I want my people to survive.
I want to survive.
So please read up on the current issues that face Kānaka Maoli. Please educate yourself on my people’s history and current affairs.
Speak up and speak out. Talk about unsustainable tourism, and speak up about how harmful a “vacation” to Hawai‘i can be. Talk about the overthrow of the Hawaiian Kingdom, and it’s injustice.
Hawai‘i is Hawaiians. Hawai‘i is our history. Hawai‘i is our home. Hawai‘i is the very blood that runs through our veins.
So please do not forget us, and please speak up with us.
Support Hawaiian Sovereignty. Restore Hawai‘i to Hawaiians.
Resources & Education:
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Just a cutesie little reminder!!
If you think bullying and belittling beginner artists is okay you can get tf off my page 🥰
#seriously don’t be a dick#I’m sick and tired of all this negativity#no one is good or bad at art we all just have different styles#and sometimes people are still learning those styles and that’s okay#and it’s also okay if you don’t like someone’s art#move on#people forget the saying ‘if you have nothing nice to say don’t say anything’ and it shows
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Oh brother
#I hate white people sm but especially Wigga’s who think they can say whatever they want just because they have a black family and#‘talk black’#and black ppl are always giving these people passes because of the black family thing and the ‘they grew up in the hood’ as if that means#anything#uhhhhh!!!!#I’m tired of black ppl constantly being okay with this and other black ppl policing ones who speak out about stuff like this#Shannon sharpe is also a coon so what else is new#rambling#I wouldn’t feel okay having my white and nb friends talking like this around me as a black person man why do sm black ppl simply not care#at all and don’t see stuff like this as weird regardless of how long the white or nbs been around black people or the culture in general#I don’t even hate the Gary Owen’s dude but still man#why do black people always have to look the other way when nbs and whites get too comfortable enough to say anything like this#there are always black folks there to police OTHER black ppl for being put off by stuff like this…#that’s why the ‘they’re invited to the bbq’ jokes have literally never been funny to me#the ‘they can say nigga they’ve earned it lol’ black people make me sick
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Knowing that I have to go home after an 8-hour shift at the job I hate to force myself to deep clean the depression nest my room has become while neck deep in the same depressive episode for the past 3 months on top of chronic pain makes me wanna scream like can I just smoke weed and sleep on the couch instead pls?
#tw mental health#personal#idk how to tag this#I’m doin BAD#like- I think I’ve run into that gifted kid thing where it’s like yeah I was told I was good at this and then growing up and realizing I#never developed the skill beyond childhood but instead of gifted kid syndrome it’s high functioning depression#like I hit my 20s and I can’t high function my way through this shit anymore#I don’t know how and that makes it worse bc I’m looking back on teen me who could pretend for days and power through#now I’m just- a depressive episode hits and I just.. everything stops y’know?#im so tired and overwhelmed and I just don’t know where to start to even dig myself out of it#I’m self soothing to the point of it being harmful#if I don’t think about how bad it is and instead focus on whatever interest it feels better#my therapist has been out sick for almost 2 months now and I’m worried about her but we work so well together that I don’t wanna find#someone new and start all over again#I just..#I tried telling my family I’m struggling and my mom told me to pray about it so it’s like okay I’m just alone to deal with this like I#always do but I’m just.. I’m not doing well enough to be able to handle this on my own and no one is listening when I say that#I’m not going to do anything but I can’t pretend the s*ic*d*l thought aren’t at the front of my mind#every single problem I have would disappear for me if I wasn’t here and that’s bitter sweet because I want to see this life through#depression#mental health#struggling with depression#major depressive disorder
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being sick as an adult sucks. wdym my mom won’t just automatically make sure I eat food instead of exclusively drinking Gatorade all day. wdym I have to ask my roommates to make me dinner. I have to Venmo a friend money to buy me more Gatorade?? I can’t focus enough to do homework??? I hate this.
#this is a silly haha humor post but in all seriousness.#COVID rly is just making me stare all the internalized ableism in the eye#yes worth isnt defined by productivity and disability and the idea of being a burden is part of being human and isn’t shameful at all#until I have to minorly inconvenience people to meet my basic needs#I really want to eat dinner but that would require asking my roommates to make me dinner which is just. 5 kinda of mortifying.#even though if someone I knew was sick I would not be upset about making them food! sick people need to eat!#my parents ordered me chipotle yesterday bc they were so concerned bc of how I sounded over the phone#and my friend went out and bought me juice and Gatorade and popsicles and took me to the doctor#the support system Exists I just feel bad about having to use it T-T#I just want to be hugged and read to and reminded to eat food but I am an adult now and not at home#lonely TT-TT#it’ll be okay I’m probably just emotional bc I’m sick and hungry#I also just am struggling so hard because I want to catch up on my classwork Right Now#but I can get through maybe one assignment before I’m too exhausted to keep sitting up#and I have to lay down and close my eyes and sleep or do a light activity like playing candy crush for the fifty bazillionth time#I’ve gotten through like. 100 levels this week.#I’m losing my dang marbles. I am gonna be so behind in ASL Susan is gonna be so disappointed in me#I feel like I have all this energy when I’m laying down bored but as soon as I sit up I feel like I’m floating and about to fall over#so. so tired. why can’t I be healthy already and do homework T-T.#I’m choosing to take this as a lesson to slow down and not overwork myself so hard. instead of being mad at myself for getting behind.#<- is trying and failing not to be mad at herself for getting behind
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The ‘rona got me guys x_x three years spent dodging it, forgot my mask at the Whaley house, and me and my sister just tested positive T_T
If/when I’m better, I read that you can donate blood cuz you’ll have a lot of antibodies and it can help people who are fighting it. Has anyone done that? I can’t recall if I’ve given blood before or not, but can you just do that at the doctors office? I’ve sold my plasma to pay bills before but I might be confusing that with giving blood idk
#poisonjack jabbers#I’ve been on and off fucking sick since July and I’ve been Covid tested every time but this is the one T_T#back in dec2019/jan2020 I was getting over a ‘flu’ that hit hard like a bitch but I was better in five days. family sick too#if this is anything like that then I think I’ll be okay. still scared tho#back then my sister’s husbands boss had JUST gotten back from a trip to Wuhan where his arms plant is and then we all got real sick#not saying the sickness then is the same Covid now but it did come on with a piercing headache just like last time too#I’m tired and no appetite
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hi i’m sick of non-girls girls shitting on me for every little thing i do and like leave me alone pls xoxo
#like i like cosmetics and fashion and suddenly i’m like a fucking airhead and basic?#it’s okay to be girly guys#sometimes it’s fine to be like other girls#internalized misogyny isn’t cute#i’m honestly just sick of being a girl at this point#i mean i love womanhood and love everything about it but it’s also tiring#a woman can’t do as much as breathe without criticism#it’s okay for girls to be alternative and it’s okay for girls to like popular things like taylor swift for example#it’s just exhausting trying to live your life and have interests and hobbies and shit as a woman because no matter what you’re torn apart#but i hate the whole ‘i’m not like other girls’ thing because what does ‘other girls’ mean and why are so obsessed with hating them#i mean i’m into alternative things and i’m obsessed with grunge so i get the whole ‘not wanting to fit into society’s standards’ thing#but it saddens me how badly misogynistic assholes have effected women’s perspectives on what being a woman is#like as if the word woman itself is a slur#it’s so annoying#text#personal#idk#ignore this
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bakugou can't be dead bc i'm relying on bkdk becoming canon solely because of how many people it would piss off and how funny that would be
the lesser known 6th stage of grief: revenge 😭😭
#I keep going back and forth between ‘he’s obviously okay’ and ‘what if he’s not though?’#kinda floating in a void rn#I’m too tired to fight antis or to rant anymore and I know people have gotten sick of seeing my account with some new anti nonsense 😭#just waiting (im)patiently !!!!!!!!#bkdk#dkbk#bakudeku#dekubaku#:’)
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ari im your biggest fan but.. volume 26 cover.. i cant support your opinion im SORRY
THE HOLLOW PURPLE FAN COVER DESERVES TO BE REAL 😭😭😭😭 we were ROBBED ari.. frojo is unescapable and the truth will catch up to you…
/ j all of this is a joke but personally im a hater 😞
🤨🤨🤨 well clearly you’re NOT my biggest fan bc if you were you would be supporting me on this Extremely important matter… a real shame bc if you just opened your eyes to the truth i would cradle you in my arms and feed you strawberries and we could have a slumber party and talk about our favorite blorbos but ig that’s not happening 😔😔 sigh. how sad. tragic.
….. jokes aside we can agree to disagree 🫂🫂 sorry but i’ll NEVER change my stance on it i truly think he looks gorgeous gojo has always had a bit of an amphibian vibe abt him and that’s one of his charm points. he’s the most beautiful man to have ever been created by human hands. if you don’t love him like this then maybe just maybe …… you don’t love him at all . 😞😞😞😞
#/j … (kind of)…….#WAIT JOKES ASIDE THOUGH#ILY ANON#YOU’RE VERY SWEET#we can still have the slumber party if you want <333 just don’t mention this topic around me pls#you don’t see the light yet but it’s okay :) i’m sure gojo will forgive you <333#…. okay this is getting kinda mean i think PHDJDBDHDI#I RLLY AM JOKING I PROMISE I’M JUST 😭😭 sick n tired of the slander …. the allegations…..#he’s sooo pretty and the colours are stunning!!! :((#i also don’t think a hollow purple colour would’ve worked at ALL bc the whole point of this cover is to show a more somber side of him#a more human side :((( he’s not fighting he’s smiling. a genuine smile. and the snow is falling and wild roses are blooming.#it’s such a melancholic and bittersweet cover…… i really do adore it :<#so beautiful#ask tag ✩
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I feel so guilty for not being productive but it’s not bc I think I have to be productive every day, it’s just bc I worry that I will never feel productive again. like one or two days in bed means I’ll never want to get out of bed again. but that isn’t true! it just isn’t true!!!
#I am a functioning person I have desire and will to do things I am just tired or maybe sick#I’ve spent days in bed before and I’ve managed to get on#also I haven’t been just in bed! I’ve been doing school work and I took a walk in the park both days#so I’m not depressed and it won’t last forever my body just needs rest right now and that’s okay#I’m glad I’m able and willing to give myself this rest. and proud#t
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me anytime i see a poll asking how you view your dad or how it’s okay to hate/dislike your dad as someone who loved their dad and misses him
#i understand these posts are not targeted towards me#but jesus christ#im just so tired of seeing the mass public disliking dads and constantly reassuring people it’s okay to not have them or to not love them#as i’m actively going about each day missing mine and crying#like i understand it#but jfc i’m so sick and tired of the entire narrative around dads being they all suck and are awful#kelly babels
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this virus got me feeling pretty shitty as soon as evening properly hit, so I’m parked in front of the TV watching The Fellowship of the Ring, feeling proper sorry for myself (joking) and enjoying Aoife being a conked out little space heater on my lap (lured to sleep by the classic Finger Rubs Between Her Eyes)
Saruman is currently throwing Gandalf around the Tower of Orthanc, in case anyone was wondering
#I take back what i said this morning it’s now quite full blown#my ears are stuffy and tingling my jaw and teeth hurt my feet and joints ache I’m coughy and sore throaty and tired#but it’s okay because I have what I need and I can sleep whenever I want and if I need to I’ll call out of work sick tomorrow and just come#back on Tuesday instead#personal#shh katie
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i’m gonna need non armys to just shut the fuck up. for one day can you please just shut your fucking mouths. thanks
#please stop putting these dumbfuck multi takes on my dash i cannot take it anymore i don’t care about what anyone besides bangtan has to say#so very fucking sick and tired of seeing ‘armys’ repost multi takes abt how bangtan are gonna be so happy to ‘get away from u freaks’#like. just say you never listen to anything they say or have ever said and fuck off. no one asked for your opinion.#okay i’m done being mad it’s blocks on sight after this shit i’m tired#.txt
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the thing is. yeah kendall feels like his whole life now is worth nothing. the one thing he was always meant to do, since he was seven years old he now cannot do. he will never get to do it. so he might as well die, right? he might as well end it all but the thing is life is never that kind nor generous. so i think kendall will try and fail. and he’ll try again and again but the world will keep its grip on him and eventually he’ll just stop trying. and yeah maybe he’ll never be a whole person (we’re nothing) maybe he’ll take logan’s advice and collect sports cars or write a book or start a new company but either way he’ll be forced to start anew. kendall logan roy died it’s just kendall now. and this outcome in itself is generous in a way because circumstances out of his control have kind of forced him to hold some accountability for his own life finally instead of counting on broken promises his father made him at 7 years old. he’s actually being forced to Be instead of just living up to someone else’s name. and he actually has people around him who still undoubtedly care. he’s sick and horrible and twisted but he is still ultimately lovable. he is still a human being weeping on the dirty ground even though he has spent so long trying not to be. even though he recanted the very thing that made him Real. the world will simply not relinquish its hold on him! tragic but somewhat hopeful in a way
#like he’s never going to be happy. never ever. but being content or even ambivalent to your life is different than being happy and i truly#think kendall could get there at some point. something about the world forcing you to go on. i like how his last scene was surrounded by#earth and water. things that are Materially Real compared to kendall himself who is Not Real. like i think while some things can’t be#repaired it’s not too late for him to be a little bit involved in his kids lives. maybe a few years down the line. rava still cares about#him and offers him so much kindness even when she shouldn’t. he will have stewy forever like. stewy will love him forever. give roman a few#months. ultimately i think roman will push kendall away at first bc he spent this whole season maintaining his family out of Necessity and#i think kendall and roman have got to a place where it’s a bit sick. and roman will come around but he needs some time and so does kendall.#but ultimately they’ll be okay.#with shiv it’s like. well. god. like kendall will never ever be able to look tom in the eye ever. but i think they will not talk for years#maybe. but they’ll ache for each other a little bit. but also the resent and anger and hurt gets in the way. but i think give it like. 10#years or idk maybe even less but 10 seems good to me. and they’ll slowly start to let each other in again. i think the three of them will#grow old together like ultimately they’ll always be kids when they’re with each other ykwim.#but idk i think kenshiv will be okay in the end jus rn it’s bleak asf. i think at different times in the next few years they will Try with#each other but the other will be so resistant but there will be a time where they’re just both so Tired and when tom dies shiv will call#kendall first even though they maybe haven’t spoken for god knows how long and he will be with her on the phone. and when connor passes away#they will hold hands again and idk. they’ll be okay. broken but okay.#anyway. i’m so over this <- girl who will never ever be over it#kendall
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How awful of a decision do you think it would be if I didn’t sleep at all tonight
#at this point I’d only get 5 hours anyway before I have to be up for school#I’m pretty sure I can manage#I have pretty easy lessons tomorrow#of course then I have singing after school which.. is far from great#and I also have to go to the store#but I think I’ll be able to handle it#worst case scenrio I fall asleep during free period#look I’m just genuinely not tired rn I won’t be able to sleep if I tried#ughhhhhhhhhhh#I don’t wanna go to school#this past week was miserable because I was sick#but at least I didn’t have to go to school#okay. okay. I’ll probably end up pulling myself together soon enough#and get at least some sleep#hopefully#we’ll see
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