#I should probably take a few days break
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went to the flower fare 😔 saw a bunch of pretty women 😔 this was a mistake 👯♀️
#sneaky niki#lamb loose liveblogging#5am sads monday vibes folks#they be hitting#I don’t even want to date I’m too tired for that#I’m just sensitive to women in general leave me alone#also. missing my grandparents more and more these days#I could try to watch ‘the farewell’ to let my sadness out. but who’s gonna sleep on a stuffy nose then??#anyway. topic of the day:#I’m fed up with ch16#I think I’m only 4k in and idk how to move on#I should probably take a few days break#maybe find time to read or watch a movie#I still have 3body open on my tablet#but like. I’m never alone at home and that series is gorgeous it deserves a bigger screen#but mother watches gossip channels all day and father is still hooked on n/cis and.. I’m tired y’all#also I want to write about HDS and SDY watching old movies at home ;-;#it just hit me. how nice that would be??#no mind games. no competitive streak. no knifing each other.#just.. watching movies in silence#maybe bickering at dinner about them#idk. maybe later in the fic. I think it would be neat#have a safe day today! and drink water too :)
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Quick Leviathan fluff that got out of control (1.4k words). SFW with suggestive aspects, MC's gender isn't mentioned.
---🧵🪡---
Ever since the release of the new Hana Ruri: Transparent Tarot Arc promotional video, Leviathan had make himself scarce. He'd erratically come out for food once in a while or grab an Akuzon package within minutes of it being delivered, but you hadn't received so much as a text from him in a week.
A mechanical whirring sometimes emanated from his room - the sound of a sewing machine at work. The occasional Sucre Frenzy song would accompany it. Nobody was worried, but it at least let everyone know the Avatar of Envy was still alive. Sometimes you'd peek in to make sure he was okay and leave a sandwich at the door. It gets lonely without him though, and eventually you went to talk with him.
The room was chilly, with the AC cranked up high. Leviathan was sitting on the ground, facing the door but blind to everything except the materials in front of him. Rolls of lace and ribbon, jars of sparkling cabochons, cases full of colorful thread and assorted sewing needles. With an impressed "woah!" you moved some empty boxes aside and sat down across from him to get a better look.
He jumped. "Gah! Don't sneak up on me like that!"
"I knocked."
"I'm busy right now. I have to finish this, it's almost ready." Leviathan glanced at his desk.
A nearly exact replica of Ruri's new PV outfit was laid out next to his PC setup. It was gorgeous. Each piece had been painstakingly recreated and carefully set out over the empty flat surfaces in his room. Fully lined with a glittering beaded trim. The base fabric had a high quality sheen even in the dim light of Levi's room, with satin stitched silk applique petals accenting the skirt.
You admired the handiwork. Then, you admired its maker. Leviathan was carefully stitching fabric flowers to a hat with intense focus. He relied on holding in small, shallow breaths to prevent his hands from shaking. He was blinking more than usual, fighting off the accumulated sleep deprivation. It marred his handsome face with dark eye bags.
You sat next to him for a while and stared. The usually shy Leviathan was too engrossed in his crafting to pay any mind. The more focused he got, the more he frowned, accentuating the wrinkles around his mouth.
"Yeah... you need a break."
"Not now." He picked up a thin awl and poked some holes where the seam was particularly thick.
Talking was futile, you quickly noted that nothing you said would make a difference, so you watched. Every few minutes, a portion of Leviathan's long bangs fell in front of his eyes and he'd blow them out of the way. He flinched when you gently swept them out of the way, as though he forgot you were there.
He huffed. "Like I said! I just have to finish this, so leave me alone. I'm almost done."
The exhaustion was clearly taking over. You hated seeing Leviathan like this, a cold grumpy shell of his normally warm and passionate self.
You intercepted his hand when he reached for another bushel of flowers. His fingertips were calloused and dotted with red indents from hand sewing thousands of stitches without a thimble. It looked painful. No wonder he was working so slowly.
"Levi..."
You lightly traced over his damaged fingertips before weaving your fingers together. You gave his hand a squeeze and his expression slightly eased.
"You're so soft," he grumbled, then fiercely shook his head. "I have to keep working, let go."
That was out of the question. You were determined to break him and force him to rest. You held on and rubbed your thumb on his.
"Ghh, stop!"
Leviathan could easily push you away, but he didn't. Instead, he raised your entwined hands to his face and pressed them against his cheek. "I'm so tired."
"I know."
"You smell so good. It's distracting."
"Thanks. Your dress is pretty."
"It's not... it's... not enough..." Tears appeared in the corners of his eyes. "I can't find the right iridescent fabric so the colors will look off in the sunlight, and my shoulders are too broad so the silhouette of the top looks weird. So to compensate I made the sleeves bigger with more poof but I had to add more darts and you can see there are more seam lines here than in the reference image. And the buttons would look better with a wooden texture but all I had on me to make them was resin, which bubbled on the back, so what if their structural integrity is weake--"
Levi eeped, stiffening as you leaned into a tight hug. You were glad he was talking to you. But he was overthinking, and frustrated. Stressed, and more than anything he needed to take a break.
You expressed as much, scooting back while holding his shoulders at arm's length. "You might think it sucks, but this costume is all you've been doing. You haven't looked at anything else in a week so you've got nothing to compare it to. It's so gorgeous, Levi. Every stitch. Take a break with me and I'll help you finish it in the morning. You'll see how amazing it really is. Okay?"
A tear drop slid down his face, he quickly wiped it away. Leviathan avoided your gaze by staring at his creation, unwilling to walk away while it remained unfinished. "I'm so tired," he repeated.
"Hana Ruri-tan would want you to take a nap. And I want you to take a nap."
Leviathan frowned again, having no logical way to refute that statement. You let him tidy up a few final things as you inspected his bed-tub.
Scraps of spare fabric dangled over the sides. You picked up his sheets to brush off loose threads, plucking out a few loose pins in the process. Pillows were fluffed. Extra fabric was put on a hanger and moved elsewhere. Rolls of ribbon were wound back up. It was kind of relaxing.
Leviathan was rushing to glue a rhinestone when you called him over, his last-ditch attempt to get one more thing finished. You let him spend another couple of minutes waiting for the paste to get tacky. Once it was finally secured in place on the hat brim, he thankfully didn't object any further. After wiping his hands clean he flopped magnificently into bed.
Not even five seconds passed by before he griped, "I can't fall asleep. I can't stop thinking about the costume. I should finish it now."
"Nooo, no, no. No. Move over, you're not getting up. I'm getting in." You slipped into the tub before he could pick himself up, draping your legs over his. "The hat can wait until morning. Then we can get pics of everything, too."
Leviathan sighed in stubborn agreement. His orange eyes, puffy and a little irritated, were looking right at you for the first time that evening.
"You'll let me think about you then, right?" he asked quietly. He wrapped his arms around you, one hand bunching up the fabric on the back of your shirt while the other grazed against your bare skin. His rough fingers traced along your spine. You made a mental note to help him bandage them later.
Pulling you flush against his upper body, he nudged his face into the side of your neck and slid his lips up your shoulder. You hooked an arm under his to gently comb through his hair, resting your chin against his head. It tickled a little, but you felt each passing breath get heavier and slower as your comforting scent lulled Leviathan into much-needed sleep. You soon followed his lead.
Come morning, Leviathan had you in a tight grip while you blearily woke up on top of him. His wandering hands had found their way up your shirt during the night and one of his legs was thrown over yours. You had planned the surprise of getting up early to finish his hat for him, but at this point a surprise morning snuggle was all you could manage.
"Hmmh? What... oh!" Levi woke quickly, with the intense determination of someone ready to finish the cosplay they've been crunching for a week straight. He looked so much better with color returned to his face. Too much color, perhaps, as the more he let go of you the redder his blush became.
"I'll be... uh... bathroom." He dragged himself out of the tub and quickly walked towards the hall, failing miserably to cover his blatant embarrassment.
"Wait! Can I start working on some things while you're gone?" you asked, motioning towards the nearly-finished costume.
Leviathan nodded. "Uh, yeah...? Go ahead."
"And you'll try it all on for me when you get back, right?"
With a full night's rest behind him and the finish line in clear sight, the giddiness of an exciting new cosplay was returning and Leviathan gave a cheerful "yeah... Ok, yeah! I'll be right back, so don't go anywhere!"
#i want fluffy cosplay times with leviathan please. but instead all i get is sewing alone at 3am. so... take this! hyah!#might take a few days break from writing stuff. i feel like i'm getting stale and repetitive but hope that's my imagination.#i should start proofreading stuff probably but. i have to get back to sewing kjhga#obey me#obey me swd#obey me scenarios#obey me x mc#obey me shall we date#obey me leviathan#obey me levi x mc#obey me leviathan x reader#obey me fluff#om leviathan#obey me fanfic#in which i want to be both mc and levi
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Fluent Freshman - Part 43
PREV
FF is a pretty good student. Solid Bs in his Gen-eds and As in regard to his major. With one C+ that he’s still working on with Captain Neil but it’s higher than the D+ that he had been pulling before Captain Neil had started to tutor him and he really just needs to pass the one gen-ed required math class.
There was many a deep breathing exercise before he made an appointment with his educational advisor for the next semester back in October but it hadn’t been that bad even though she was the one that had asked if he knew anyone good at math since it obviously was not a strong suit of his. So he dragged his grade up from a D+ to a C+ and he was pretty proud of that.
FF has a preferred spot in each and every one of his classrooms. In his Gen-Ed courses he sits in spots that the Professors don’t even notice and where there is almost always a gap between him and the next person. He arrives perfectly almost late every single day for every single class he can to achieve this feat.
For his Major classes he sits near the front with the few Foreign Language major friends that he has.
FF likes to be prepared. Studying was a nice way to prepare for the future. If he’s already read the entire textbook front to back and taken notes then a pop quiz can’t catch him off guard. He double, triple, and quadruple checks homework. He could probably recite the syllabus for any of his classes off the top of his head. He has read it so much to make sure he’s gotten everything and is on track.
FF kind of likes finals week.
For once, for one week, everyone is as anxious as him.
He sits next to Nicky patting his back as his friend sobs into a pillow. “I’m not going to graduate and it’s going to delay seeing Erik by an entire year!” Nicky yells as he brings his face out of the pillow.
“Nicky, you only got one flashcard wrong how about you shut the fuck up!” Aaron yells from his desk where he seems to have spontaneously developed ambidextrousness as he writes notes with both hands. “Fuck I am NEVER fitting all of this one one index card.” Aaron slams his face into the table.
“I don’t even need this degree.” Matt says looking down at a textbook that he has not turned a page on for the last hour. The fact that Matt had also not even opened that textbook before now was a bit of a cause for concern. “I’ve already got offers for professional teams. I can just play Exy. I do not need to pass a workplace psychology course.” Matt says.
“You think Dan wants an idiot?!” Nicky demands not wanting to go down alone.
“She thinks it’s cute that I’m stupid!” Matt exclaims.
“No she doesn’t!” Aaron points at him, “She said and I quote ‘I love it when you use that big ol sexy brain of yours.’ the last time you had her on speaker phone!” he uses a slightly more…effeminate voice when he impersonates Dan but FF had spoken with Dan and to his memory she did not sound like that.
“Fuck you’re right she deserves an all rounder!” Matt cries, head in his hands.
“Why do I even have to TAKE this Gen-Ed about history?” Nicky demands now holding onto FF as if he were a teddy bear.
“So that we’re well-rounded individuals with a wider perspective on-”
“Smithy, my sweet child, I was not looking for an answer.” he feels Nicky’s hand come up to his hair and maybe he’s being treated more like a favored pet?
“You’re having trouble with a Gen-Ed?!” Aaron asks turning around in his seat, “That’s embarrassing.” he turns his nose up.
“I’m having trouble with something that is going to be useless in my adult life.” Nicky says as if he were not currently an adult. “You are having issues with a class that will have huge ramifications on your future if you don’t manage to learn it!” Nicky points out.
“Eat my shorts Nicky.” Aaron hisses.
“Maybe I could study if you would wash your shorts Aaron. I can smell your laundry pile from over here!” Matt spits.
The fight devolved from there and FF slipped out of the dorm as Nicky was holding a chair over his head to seemingly throw at Matt for his ‘unreasonable number of sticky notes messing up the flow of Nicky’s studying’.
He heard a crash.
“It’s probably fine.” he says to himself and he has his index cards with the speech he has to give for and he really should go over to talk with Captain Neil.
He walks to Captain Neil, Andrew, and Kevin’s door and-
“There faster-!”
FF walks away from Captain Neil, Andrew, and Kevin’s door, remembering only in this moment that Kevin had declared that he would be “Living in the library until this paper is done or I am.” to the team at the last practice of the year.
Captain Neil and Andrew were never the type to waste an empty dorm room.
He misses Pepto Bismol as he hears a particularly dirty line of Russian coming from his Captain’s dorm room.
***
Eventually Finals week is done and dusted with only 4-5 more blow-ups in his dorm room that result in Nicky, Aaron, and Matt stopping their fight to see if they accidentally had knocked him out with all of the thrown debris (only happened once when Aaron threw a textbook that Nicky ducked but he didn’t.)
FF came out of his final…final feeling pretty good all around. He had managed to get some extra tutoring time with Captain Neil after Kevin managed to finish his history paper a little early. Despite all of their fears and complaints Aaron, Nicky, and Matt all did manage to pass all of their finals and their classes.
The Tower was closing tomorrow for the rest of the year and despite checking almost every day with Nicky he still was invited to go to New York City with most of the team to stay at Allison’s house.
“Smithy, did you pack a swimsuit?” Nicky asks.
“Nicky, we’re going to New York for Christmas break. Do you think we’re going to swim?” Aaron asks incredulously.
“Two words, my fetus of a cousin: Hot. Tub.” Nicky holds his hand up and putting one finger up and then another.
“Is hot tub two words?” Matt asks as he reaches for his own swim trunks.
“Yes Matt hot tub is two words.” FF says nodding.
“Thank you Smithster.” Matt says.
“I can’t believe you don’t know that hot tub is two words.” Aaron says with a huff.
“I can’t believe that you don’t know how to not be an asshole even after you started getting regular sex with Katelyn.” Matt returns, “Look at how not a thing that was when Smithster answered it.” he gestures to FF.
“You cannot compare Smithy to Aaron. Apples and Tomatoes.” Nicky dismisses.
“Whatever, so Allison got a hot tub at her place?” Aaron moves past the conversation.
“Aaron you just made fun of Matt for asking stupid questions.” Nicky says with a hand on his cheek.
“I fucking hate being part of your family.” Aaron says without any real heat.
“Yeah sure.” Nicky says, rolling his eyes and smiling as he saw Aaron packing swim trunks that FF knew he had bought for his cousin.
“Okay, I’ve got the packing list that Allison sent. Do we wanna run through it so that we’re all properly packed?” Matt says holding up his phone.
“Yeah, let’s run through it.” Nicky says with a sigh.
They went through Allison’s provided list twice and then zipped up their suitcases. Smith was going to be driving to the airport with Matt. Neil and Andrew were going to be driving the Maserati up alone while the rest of them were going to be flying up to New York City.
Now onto something that filled FF with far more dread than simply passing tests that determined whether or not he continued to get a free ride in college.
Meeting new people.
MASTERPOST FOR ALL PARTS OF FLUENT FRESHMAN AU
#Fluent Freshman AU#Just as a note I'm probably going to be taking November off#I should be getting the keys to the Condo on Halloween#and there's just so much to do with it#So I'll be doing a smaller WW#and taking the month off for FF#But I'll come back with some fun I've been planning for ages#Specifically Smith getting to meet Renee and Allison for the first time#And really getting to know Dan#There may be a few special guests but I haven't decided yet#Andrew and Neil absolutely take an extra day to get up to New York for 'absolutely no reason'#but the reason was that they pulled off to a quiet pit stop and made out for so long that it was just irresponsible for them#to not go to a motel#As for where we left off with the Winter Banquet#It was just Smith waiting around until the bus came back#He just ignored that old dude looking for him#and walked to the bus without breaking stride#Who knows who said that Smith was there#I do#FF - 42#AFTG AU#AFTG OC#Andreil#Nicky Hemmick#Kevin Day#Aaron Minyard#Matt Boyd
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I love it when a plan comes together
#wip log#heavy's face always reacts weird to light that's gonna take a lot of work#i'm starting to hate art again so I should probably take a few days break
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by the lighthouse.
dividers
#alright i suppose i should tell what's up lately! im mostly posting this like a mini update or whatever haha#so - since i made that last post on my disappearance i worked endlessly to finish my animation project and thank goodness it's finally over#i had to take a break from trying to be social here and just stay in my own space and i did that by having a smaller side blog to ramble#the project was very... tiring - definitely took out so much energy from me post physically and mentally and i was just frustrated everyday#so i just took my time to be alone with a few close people and i like to think im okay now?#i like to think so - since i was able to deliver a few commission drafts today so i'm relieved that im back to my usual pace#I'll post a few of my doodles here i did during my project just to fill the void haha#i've acquired a minor familial from another video game and i care for him a lot :] idk ill bother to talk abt it here but yeah thats funnn#also indulging a lil bit of t.n.m.n content as of late also thanks to my friend who knows abt it hehe#soo yeah! I don't know if ill be active like the usual but know that i'm doing alright now! hope everyone's doing okay too xoxo#ill probably still stay in my smaller blog for a little longer but will occasionally pop in here!#sooo yaaa#~ art#♥️ memoryshipping#also yea i think no.rton only had like. 10 days worth of being the blog brand here until i switched back to the usual guy lmaooo sorry 😔
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Hiii guys.
I've already been out of my mind busy for the past few months, and with midterms happening and my thesis defense soon I may not be super active here for a bit.
As it stands now I'm not leaving this blog. This has been my home for the past few years and I love the story too much to let go. I will assess how I'll talk about Tommy/Phil/Tubbo etc going forwards based on their responses, lack thereof, info on what is and isn't allowed to be said legally, etc.
If you're reading this I love you so so so much. I am at all times overflowing with love for the dsmp/mcyt community and what it's done for me. Some of the happiest moments I've had in my life were because of you all.
Also, if you're rebranding or moving blogs or w/e and we're mutuals I'd love to follow your new account even if we share 0 interests in common now, feel free to lmk where you're headed to (if you want) ❤️
#i think i need to be less on Tumblr for a minute because well.#i have an unhealthy attatchment to this community. i like get physically sick when i see a blog i loved has deleted.#and i cant really take the stress of watching ppl leave and checking for updates/statements on this situation rn so. may take a short break#i am coming back though. promise. probably wont even be a week.#(disclaimer 1: supporting shubble should always be everyones first priority. not trying to make this situation abt me just posting an update#on my blog about how my blog will be handling things.)#((disclaimer 2: if you see me post this ans a few days later im back here that means i failed in my attempt to not doomscroll 💔))#doodle.txt
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Still thinking about Spiderpeople (and people connected to those Spiderpeople) from the universes where it seems an awful lot like they’re the only heroes landing in a universe where it’s one of the Spiderpeople who’s surrounded by other heroes like the Avengers and the Fantastic 4, etc
And obviously because of this they’re gonna be extra careful about secret identities because of all the extra heroes who aren’t Spidey hanging around, and I’m just thinking about the Prowler (Aaron) trying to figure out if he’s alive or even existing in this universe while trying not to give away too much so he’s just like “who’s the coolest bald man you know?”
And Spidey’s like “oh!! I know exactly who you want!! follow me!!”
He brings them to Nick Fury.
Later on they run into what’s obviously a variant of Miles, who the other Spidey of that universe didn’t bring up because Miles isn’t known as “Spiderman” in that universe (maybe it’s like “arachnikid,” or it’s Prowler!Miles, or maybe he’s just going through a phase where he’s trying out a new hero name each week, etc)
So Aaron’s like “oh great, I can definitely ask him, but again I gotta be discrete because of all these extra heroes around” so he asks him in the exact same way he asked the other Spidey (“who’s the coolest bald man you know?”)
Miles also brings them to Nick Fury.
(Yes his uncle is still alive, yes the other Aaron is absolutely gonna tell on him)
Also! Because there’s so much emphasis on the other heroes handling “big stuff”, I like to imagine they all keep trying to insert themselves into the situation because it’s a multiverse situation which falls under “their jurisdiction” and Spidey’s just like “??? they’re all Spiderpeople tho, this is my thing, go away, shoo”
#this is being scheduled in case I don’t come back#I mean like in case I’m gone for more than a few days#taking some time off the internet#either this is a healthy break or I’m isolating myself. not fully sure.#hopefully I come back mentally better#and not. like. worse because it was actually a ‘bad isolation’ thing.#so yeah we’ll see#it’s gonna feel weird not posting everyday#should I make a post before taking a break? …nah I don’t think it’ll be a big deal#(<- famous last words but seriously I’ll be fine)#I’ll probably be back once they finish figuring out my financial aid stuff so I don’t have to keep stressing over it#they’re having issues accepting my ward of the court letter it’s hella stressful#I don’t really *need* to schedule a post but I hardly ever use the scheduling function#so I’m using the excuse <3#scheduling for the dead hours as a fun gift for the people who will still be up at that time#Spiderman#spiderwoman#spidermen#spiderwomen#spiderpeople#peter parker#just cause he’s my default spidey#miles morales#aaron davis#the prowler#nick fury#Spider-Man#spider man
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Cringetober day 6: Neko
You know I had to do it to em
#hey. hey remember that one spiderman and she hulk crossover where she got cat features cause of weird Egyptian god magic? I remember…#I must be the most predictable creature on gods green earth#robbie reyes#ghost rider#cringetober#my art#don’t worry it should only last a few days#finally forces this guy to take a fucking break and rest a little like jeez#actually. you know what. he would probably just go to work with a hat on#dr strange fixes it eventually don’t worry about it#sketch#lisa (ghost rider)#gabe reyes
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.
#it went!!! idk lately my pain treshhold has been so low bc im in pain all the time#so i just dont wnna be in pain anymore... he said that now it'll still hurt for a few days T-T#but he wasnt exactly sure what it was but i had.. a cavity??#im not rlly sure abt the english terms for all of this but the tooth is dying lol#but instead of immediately killing it nd getting a root fill he said that we should give the tooth a chance#so he fixed what he could fix#i hate dentist treatments bc of all the air nd water nd my anxiety i need to swallow constantly#but this time i actually told them abt it nd he was very helpful sksks#he even said 'ok now take a break nd swallow' so i didnt need to be so anxious#nd it was a relief bc he wasnt bad at all. he was actually rlly nice nd easy to talk to phewww#it cost abt $80 so i can manage to be without that until next week!!!!#so yeah it went much better than i had anticipated so im happy abt that#but yeah the problem still isnt 100% fixed yet so im still not relieved#he said i had a cavity in my other tooth as well but that we needed to check that at another time#im so frustrated bc i brush my teeth 2/day i use mouthwash i floss....#and for the last 7 months i havent even had any sugar!!!!! like why did this still happen.. o.o#oh nd he also said that i probably clench my teeth nd yeah i do that a lot more than i've realized#your teeth arent supposed to be touching!! never!! only when u eat#my teeth.... are touching pretty much all day omg. bc im so tense nd anxious#he said that he couldnt be sure bc he didnt have enough info to go on but that could have contributed to this#well well... i did it nd went even if i didnt want to#hopefully my tooth will be better now. nd i have another appt in may to see what i could get done further#if financial aid for it gets approved tho it might not#but yeah.. god dental pain nd issues is my no. 1 fear bc im poor nd i cant afford it
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I've been playing Luigi's Mansion 3 blind for the first time despite having had the game for three to four years and i just want to say i absolutely love Luigi. I thought this when i played Luigi's Mansion 2 and i think it now this guy is so brave. Like he's just a little guy and he's got a resting happy blank face and he's so so scared but he's being so so brave about everything, people don't give him enough credit. Guy is a scaredy cat and still chose to stay in the haunted hotel where everything wants his ass dead just to save his friends and family. And he's doing a damn good job of it too, King Boo and the other one are getting increasingly pissed every time i see them <3
Anyway yeah if my brain wasn't already occupied with like three different blorbos he'd be a great candidate for one. Luigi my beloved (*˘︶˘*).｡*♡
(if he gets paired up with someone i'm glad it's Bowser. He deserves someone how treats him right and we all know Bowser is the guy for that)
#ive been doing nothing but playing this game for three days help#FR THO LMFAO I ONLY TAKE BREAKS WHEN MY SWITCH DIES. OR WHEN I GET CALLED DOWN. FROM MY BED TO EAT#BOTH MY CONTROLLERS WONK HORRIBLY BUT THAT DOESNT STOP ME ITS JUST A GOOD GAME :D#i cant remember the last time i was so taken by a game. the dact that im playing blind probably also helps#i have had to ask for help from my brother a few times cause i didnt want to use the internet and onky twice did we have to look anyway#i love figuring out puzzles. this is the game for me i think#damn i gtt all the sound effects and songs stuck in my head as i go to sleep now. lmao#its also been helping me feel alright lately... this is so nice#anyway pls no spoilers past floor 12 <3#luigi nintendo#luigi's mansion#luigi's mansion 3#should i tag bowuigi. if anyone sees this tell me#anyway.#luigi my beloved#<3
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Cannot sleep :/
#just pav things#lying awake here with Inigo meta thoughts#specifically the nuances of why he never intervened when Archie and Dism were fighting#He is torn between these two ideas of reality— whether Archie is dead or alive. That is true.#But eventually the latter idea takes more of a foothold; which is just a recipe for mental disarray#It’s a break from the comfortable cycle of self-hatred and destruction. So this new thought has to be counteracted to maintain inertia#So as I understand it he’s now caught on those lingering feelings of abandonment that Archie has left him with. and he is Not Happy.#Because just as he interpreted himself as being a replacement for Dism#He’s interpreting Archie and his little motley crew as a further refusal to move on from the past#And because Inigo acts on impulse (as seen best with the 💥 arm getting blown off) he’s using that momentary anger#to distract himself from the core issue as he lashes out ✨#He’s kind of a hypocrite that one. Stresses the importance of embracing unpleasant memories as a fundamental part of your character#(To the point of berating Idyllia for going the total memory wipe route instead)#but he is ALSO an escapist at heart. Neither of them want their definition of pain so they both have terrible routines to try avoiding it ✌#I’m sorry if this made no sense Dolphin I will probably do a retake with more braincells in the next few days#You know I’ve been analysing the design of this kindergarten in sydney for VCD#It’s called Nubo. Now I’ve always had a fondness for Scandinavian aesthetics but this is PEAK#So I went down a research rabbit hole and I came out of it with a clear concept for what Amonea Montessori School should feel like!#It’s this sort of cross-concept between stereotypical Australian architecture and hygge#Those oak panels and muted colours and glass everywhere#And I can carry through to an overall unique visual identity for Amonea#After all Byrgir should feel similarly detached from Earth in it’s own subtle ways#Tapping more into solarpunk and that overall comforting feeling for Amonea in particular~#I’m so happy :D
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seeing them side by side is so sexy
#river dipping#didn’t really notice until now but the colors for their blogs compliment each other well#anyway… eye am going to go write <3#spent some time reading and a bit of time on here#but my goal today is to get some writing done and then i want to get to editing this mattodore screenshot i took#i wanna give it the full treatment so it’ll take me a bit probably#but if i have no luck with either of them then i want to either get in-game and take more screenshots orrr get in blender for a new pose 🧑#i just really want to create something today while my eyes are okay and my mood is good#i did decide to take a break from the oc question prompts i mentioned in one of those asks i answered a few days ago#i might scrap it tbh… idk should i share some parts… i did actually get like 1k of writing done on each doc. for mattodore but idk.#i just wasn’t feeling it i don’t think#so i’m going to find a new set today!#…if you see me on here again in anything less than two hours pleaseeeeeee yell at me !! that is not enough time to have written anything !!
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Is it even worth it to get back to the fic when I should really be downstairs finishing the dishes
#text post#the Bad has wriggled out of the depths of my brain and I did pop a couple of edibles but I also should really take a T break day#so they probably won't do much of anything unless I take a few more now#I just want to feel happy and fucking silly and not have my brain be mad at me for still existing like can we fuckin NOT today#i ask as if I haven't been asking that for years months days of my life on and off since like. age ten#whatever i'll delete whatever sucks and go down by four so i only have a half hour to write things and won't even ultimately stay on the do
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half tempted to take a small break from tumblr
#for my own mental health you see#i keep getting upset over small things#or what i think should me small things though they feel so much more bigger and personal#this is my only friend group so everything feels bigger and personal#and thats not a good mindset to be in#if i do take a break itll probably be for a few days so not very long#just long enough for a break! to step back so i can leave the mind space of like#feeling hurt constantly and nonstop dwelling on it#you can contact me on discord if you like im really bad at combating loneliness so i would say its even encouraged 😭
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I kind of want to do a temperature blanket, but I don't care about the temperature, so I'm trying to think of something along the same format that's not as boring as temperature. I'm thinking maybe moon phases? I considered sunrise and sunset time, but it would require a lot of yarn and I'm not sure exactly how I would format it. Any ideas?
#i love knitting. its very calming#and i can do other things like listen to podcasts or music or watch a show while i do it#(it kills my hands because i was stupid when i first started knitting but we dont talk about that)#if you knit please don't push yourself too hard. take breaks. stretch your hands every few rows#ive made two blankets and a scarf and right now im working on a boanket for myself#the two blankets were for my best friend and my sibling. the scarf was for my girlfriend#now im working on a blanket thats just for me#because i realized i should probably stop or really limit my knitting after this#i really fucked up my hands tbh and i like using sign language and playing instruments so i dont want to make them worse#but a blanket like a temperature blanket is only one or two rows per day#its nice and limited knitting so i think i can manage that#but i dont know what to do!#i really do like the idea of moon phases because i love the moon :)#but im not sure. and id like a couple more ideas#my gf recommended tv show genres because im always watching a tv show#but rn im watching two game shows and a crime drama#maybe podcast genres? i love listening to podcasts because im alone so much at my job#and i usually dont listen to more than one at once#oh thats a cool idea#anyway lmk if you have any other ideas#love yall bye
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Also at what point should I be concerned about shoulder pain. Like just out of pure scientific interest.
#like are my shoulders actually fucked or was today just bad#like my job involves a lot of lifting and general arm movements and being on my feet all day and i know this is going to do a lot to my body#as someone who would ideally be one with a couch if she could#but besties is it normal to have to take ibuprofen preemptively before my shift even starts & both ibuprofen and paracetamol at lunch#and still have pains in my shoulders at the end of the day#if i DON’T take them the pain is so bad i feel faint. i made that mistake one time and now never again#my coworkers probably call me the pill popper or something but idc who sees me downing painkillers in the break room#I NEED THIS TO STAY ALIVE#but is it normal. and does it make any type of fucking sense that sometimes the pain is even worse when i’m resting#i had 3 days off at the start of the week and i swear my pain actually built#i picked my niece (chonky toddler) up a few times and swung her about to try to recalibrate my shoulder and it actually helped lol#should i be lifting weights? strengthening my shoulder? or is it just fucked. what do#and yes thanks i know i should go to a doctor but the only good gp at my local practice just left so instead i think i’m just going to#continue with my pill regimen until my shoulder fixes itself OR i end up in a&e. one or the other#personal
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