Tumgik
#I don't remember which parts were me and which parts I was like "oo that's a great idea'' and just folded it in with the rest hahaaa TuT
splickedylit · 1 year
Link
Chapters: 1/1 Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Additional Tags: Crossing Timelines, Hurt/Comfort, Badass Future Selves, Lots of references to Bad End Timeline stuff including:, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Implied/Referenced Grievous Bodily Harm/Amputation, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Self-Sacrifice, (All deaths closer to the latter but some with tones of the former), everything is okay now, But Boy Was It Not Okay For A Minute There, If an alternate version of you gets your memories do they become you, are they still really themself if they have all your memories as well?
Summary:
“Yeah, I’m still me,” Leo says. “This guy’s just in here too, now. Along for the ride.” His chest still feels kind of like it’s exploding; he breathes through that and straightens up, pretending to straighten his bandanna, scrubbing at his prickling eyes—Casey is kind enough to at least pretend he doesn’t notice. “It’s just…you get to meet Raph, in this world,” Leo says, in an attempt to give even the most half-assed of explanations for why he’s such an absolutely embarrassing mess right now. “And Donnie, you lost Donnie too early, he loved you so much, kid. We all did.” -- One by one, in the timeline that ended the world, the Hamato family dies--and wakes up, somewhere kinder. One by one, in a timeline that saved the world, the Hamato family wakes up and remembers exactly how much they could have lost.
Tumblr media Tumblr media
64 notes · View notes
starleska · 5 months
Text
a non-exhaustive guide to writing the Toymaker's fake German accent (or, how RTD broke the German language so effectively) 🔥
Tumblr media
hello everyone!!! 🥰 after a tremendous response to my Toymaker x Reader fic 'Dollface', lots of you reached out for some advice on writing the Toymaker's dialogue: specifically his faux-German accent 👀 now i am by no means an authority, but i do love figuring out unusual character voices and the 'rules' they follow while speaking! so i've put together this non-exhaustive guide on my logic for writing the Toymaker's fake German, based on the snippet of script we have, Neil Patrick Harris' delivery in The Giggle, a never-used linguistics degree and a few years of German lessons 😂 do take these 'rules' with a grain of salt; there is no right or wrong way to write the Toymaker, or any character for that matter! however, my autistic self had a lot of fun writing this, and i hope it gives you some useful pointers if you're struggling with how to write that horrible entity's butchering of the German language 🙈 as the Toymaker would say: 'Zey are very, very, importanten, zese rules, don't you sink?' 😉
consonant sounds (part one) 🧡
as you can see above, Russell T Davies wrote the script of 'The Giggle' so Neil Patrick Harris would sound 'German' in a very specific way. one way he did this is by replacing consonants. consonants are the opposite of vowels (a, e, i, o, u, and sometimes y), and are made by obstructing breath while speaking. by comparison, vowels are made by speaking without this vocal obstruction!
the way we pronounce words varies between accents. the Toymaker's faux-German accent is a stereotype of how speakers with German as their mother tongue may pronounce English. as such, having a general knowledge of German pronunciation makes writing the Toymaker's accent easier!
for the Toymaker, this means that consonant sounds like [w] (the 'w' in 'win') becomes [v] (the 'v' in 'violet'). this is common for German pronunciation ✨
in certain instances, the Toymaker will also flip pronunciation and change [d] (the 'd' in 'day') to [t] (the 't' in 'time'), which is why he calls Donna 'Tonna'.
likewise, sometimes the consonant digraph (two consonants forming a single sound) [ð] (the 'th' sound in 'the') becomes [ɗ] (the 'd' sound in 'dog'). this is how you end up with 'dee' instead of 'the'! however, sometimes [ð] becomes [z] (the 'z' sound in 'zebra'). this is how you end up with 'zey' instead of 'they', and 'zis' instead of 'this'! 🔥 (note: the Toymaker jumps around between these pronunciations, so you can use both!)
consonant sounds (part two) 💛
on occasion, the Toymaker will also substitute [ð] for an entirely different sound: [s] (the 's' sound is 'sun'). this transforms 'think' into 'sink'! likewise, the Toymaker will sometimes change [ŋ] (the 'ng' sound in 'sing') to [k] (the 'k' sound in 'kind'). combining the two, this makes the word 'everything' into 'everysink'!
putting all of this together, we can Toymakerify pronunciations! the sentence 'They were everything to me' becomes 'Zey vere everysink to me.'
now, the Toymaker's accent is inconsistent: in the above picture you can see a rule being broken by writing out 'everything' as 'everysing' rather than 'everysink'. don't be afraid to be loose with it - remember, this isn't the Toymaker's real accent, and he slips up too (especially when he forgets himself) 🤭
vowel sounds 💚
as i don't have access to the full script, i am unsure how often the vowel sounds are written out compared to the consonant sounds. however, we can see a few sounds being exaggerated in a stereotypically German fashion: the [ʌ] (the 'uh' in 'cup') becomes [uː] (the 'oo' in 'tool'), transforming 'beautiful' into 'beautifool'. likewise, the [ə] sound in 'the' becomes elongated into [i], transforming 'the' into 'thee' (or, with the consonant rules, 'dee').
verbs 💙
one of the silliest aspects of the Toymaker's accent is his tendency to add the '-ge' prefix to verbs (action/doing words). this means a word like 'learning' becomes 'ge-learning', and 'want' becomes 'ge-want' (or 'ge-vont' if we add in the consonant rules) 🙈
depending on your preference, sometimes the Toymaker adds an additional 's' to the end of these verbs! so 'learning' not only becomes 'ge-learning': it can become 'ge-learnings'!
sometimes the Toymaker also supplements his verbs with auxiliary verbs, specifically 'be'. you can see this in his construction: 'What is he being inventing now?' the 'being' doesn't need to be there!
however, the Toymaker isn't consistent with either of these rules. in particular with the '-ge' prefix, he will usually only use this once per sentence. try not to overload your sentences with too many of these rules: remember that he still needs to be understandable! ⚡
plurals 💜
some German plurals (multiples of a thing) are created using the '-en' suffix: for instance, 'die Frau' ('the woman') becomes 'die Frauen' ('the women'). this is why the Toymaker frequently changes the English plural suffix '-s' or -'es' (as in 'cats' and 'boxes') to '-en'!
this makes 'snakes' into 'snaken', 'hobbyhorses' into 'hobbyhorsen', and 'dolls' into 'dollen'. silly, yet effective 😂
adjectives 🤎
surprise!!! the Toymaker doesn't just add the -en suffix to plurals...he also adds '-en' indiscriminately to adjectives (describing words) 🙈 words like 'important' become 'importanten', and 'favourite' becomes 'favouriten'!
the key to this rule is that the original word must be intact after adding '-en'. for instance: 'balden' would work for 'bald', but 'clouden' wouldn't work for 'cloudy', because it replaces a vital sound! because we only have a couple of examples of him using this rule, this is the best way i've figured out how to use it without making his speech sound overburdened or clunky 💖
experiment with this rule however you like!!! here's some fun Toymakerisms i've just come up with: 'plumpen' for 'plump', 'squaren' for 'square', and 'coolen' for 'cool'. 😉
random usage of real German words (part one) 🖤
something which makes the Toymaker's fake German so effective is how liberally he sprinkles in real German words into his speech. the majority of these words are common ones which are recognisable to most English speakers, and include conjunctions and pronouns. here are a few German words that the Toymaker canonically uses:
mit - with | und - and | ja - yes | wunderbar - wonderful | nein - no | das - that | guten Tag - good day | ein - a (remember that in German it would be ein or eine for masculine vs feminine, but the Toymaker doesn't make this distinction!) | mein - my (same as ein - it would be mein or meine, but he seems to only use meine as an accented thing rather than referring to gendered nouns!).
random usage of real German words (part two) 💖
every now and again, the Toymaker will use a random German noun: for instance, 'Straße' for 'street', or 'Achtung!' for 'danger!'.
however, the Toymaker also uses real German words/phrases in the incorrect context. for instance, when the Toymaker screams, 'BACKEN SIE!', a non-German speaker might take this to mean 'GET BACK!', when it actually means 'BAKE THEM!' 😂 the golden rule is for the Toymaker's speech to sound German at all costs, not for it to be linguistically accurate!
RTD also writes out words like 'come' as 'komm', referencing the German word 'kommen'. adding in a little German spelling goes a long way to replicating his accent when written down!
when writing the Toymaker, i chose to expand on this pseudo-German by including additional words to 'Germanify' his speech: for instance, using 'ist' for 'is' and 'hast' for 'have'. i also add in other general phrases, such as 'Herzlichen Glückwunsch' for 'congratulations!'. if you have a general knowledge of German, you can play around with the Toymaker's speech this way 😉
onomatopoeia and reduplication ✨
part of the charm of the Toymaker's terrible German accent is how musical and inviting it seems. a really cute tendency of his is to use onomatopoeia (words which sound like what they are) and reduplication (the repetition of sounds in a set) together. examples of this are 'splishy-splashy' and 'clippety-clop'! 🥺
onomatopoeia adds a sensory dimension to the Toymaker's speech, and reduplication is most often associated with baby-talk and children. in this way, the Toymaker's speech is playful and childish, and lures you into his performance.
this is why in 'Dollface', i chose to have the Toymaker vocalise 'Choo-choo!' for the train, and to describe his dolls as 'ge-having ein chitter-chatter.' add a touch of this here and there, and it helps to demonstrate the Toymaker's playful nature 🥰
grammar 💀
thankfully for us, the Toymaker's grammatical constructions are largely unchanged from English! this is because the Toymaker's faux-German is supposed to evoke German while still being understandable. his language isn't a real representation of a German speaker speaking English: it's a pantomime version! 🔥
general ideas/tips 🧸
if you're struggling with writing the Toymaker's German accent, try writing it out in non-accented English first! it's a lot easier to think of how to 'Germanify' English which already exists then coming up with it on the fly (although that will get easier the more you do it 😉).
try not to overburden your sentences with too many of these rules!! it is easy to think that pouring as many Germanisms as possible into the Toymaker's speech will just make him sound like himself, but this might break the reader's immersion. trust that sometimes less is more - especially if you are going to be writing the Toymaker accent-switching.
have fun!! don't worry about these ideas too much - you're writing fic, not a dissertation 💖 the Toymaker's whole deal is being playful and engaging in games - he isn't even following his own bloody rules!! just enjoy the process - you can always add more to his speech later 🔥
that's all for now!!! use this silly little guide however you like 🥰💖 godspeed in writing your Toymaker fics - i do hope this helps a bit. and shout-out to all the lovely fluent German speakers who have reacted with both humour and horror to the Toymaker's faux-German (including in my own writing) 😂
75 notes · View notes
lensman-arms-race · 13 days
Text
Episode 73 part 2
Just watched it, now to rewatch a couple of times with commentary. (Haven't had a chance to reverse TTv's lines.)
Why did TCam and TSpeaker wait to attack while TTv and G-Toilet were grumping at each other? Just deck the fucker! :D
Now we know yellow and green orb = explosion. Why didn't G-Toilet try the yellow and purple orb, though? TTv would be the most useful Titan to possess because he can command the other two.
I do like how TCam 'nuh-uh'd the yellow-and-purple orb! :D He's become genre-savvy.
Also lols at how un-gracefully TTv landed after doing a big sword attack. I guess rolling gracefully is hard when you're that size. (Also there's a cloud of black fog when he lands - did TTv summon some fog to disguise his ungainly fall? Because lmao)
G-Toilet appears to be fundamentally flush-proof, just like the first time the Alliance tried that. Maybe his cistern's empty.
Poor, poor Titan Speaker, getting parasitised again. I was surprised - I thought he'd be able to no-sell it this time, and we'd be misled into thinking the parasite had gottim but no, he crushed it or something. But he really does get re-parasitised! TTv says something, and it already sounds like 'Get this shit out' when not reversed, haha.
TCam speaks again! "You're mine." How is he doing that??
Rambo Toilet makes a re-appearance and narrowly avoids getting squished. Burrowing exploding toxic waste toilet is pretty cool - it's like a robot mole/crab. The blast radius even makes poor POV cam lose an arm!
We don't see TTv remove the parasite from TSpeaker - I wonder if DFB wrote it that way on purpose to give fans an opportunity to write/animate their own version of how that went down. (Maybe we'll get a look in the full version, which DFB said would have extra scenes.)
Fuck yes! TTv finally remembers he has some fuck-off back spikes!
Does G-Toilet say "You need me"?? I'll have to check once DFB makes the full episode and adds subs. Implying that G-Toilet is the only one who can stop the Astros, perhaps - or that G-Toilet knows some other secret that the Alliance wants to have.
"I will survive." Oh, now we know what the G stands for (Gloria Gaynor).
Wait, so what was in the shipping containers? Just a load of dripping piss rockets? That was all?
Oo, Titan TV is not a happy bunny.
Wait, why is it a thing that G-Toilet can fly over the horizon and stymie the Titans? They can all fly too; why don't they just follow him? :D
20 notes · View notes
kairiscorner · 10 months
Note
Hiii can I request going to an amusement park with Noir? Like they ride a Rollercoaster, Ferris wheel, and the viking? (Para may ref, isipin mo ung Enchanted kingdom o sky ranch) Salamat thanks!! :DDD
HI ANON 🫶🫶🫶oh that'd be quite the experience for him tbh :' )) i personally have never been to EK or sky ranch (oo alam ko na, nasa bahay ako buong buhay ko 😭😭😭) BUT HERE'S HOW I IMAGINE THAT'D PLAY OUT !!!
going to amusement parks with spider noir
he'd be a little overwhelmed, but extremely excited the first time he'd go with you. he'd be so giddy on the way there, like a child would if it were their first time :)
HE'D WANT A THOUSAND OF THOSE EK WIZARD HATS
he'd plop one on you, chuckle, and say, "look, love, you're finally as tall as me."
out of all three rides, i think the one that gave him the least anxiety was the ferris wheel. like, think about it, it isn't exactly anything too crazy compared to the other two, the only remotely scary bit of it is the part where you get to the top.
he's not exactly afraid of the heights, he's spiderman, he's practically on every height in the city. though when he notices you freaking out, even a little, he himself gets a little uneasy and doubts himself just a smidge.
but he tries to remember you need him, in the toughest and easiest of times. he'd gently bring your hand in his, look into your eyes and tell you, "we don't have to go through with it, love, if you aren't comfortable. if you still want to go anyway... i'll be right here to keep you safe. you're not gonna fall any time soon if i'm here."
and when you two get on the ferris wheel, he actually got super delighted :DD HE WAS REALLY LOOKING FORWARD TO THE PART WHERE YOU TWO KEEP GOING HIGHER AND HIGHER, BUT CLINGING ON TO YOU A THE WHILE INVOLUNTARILY
of course, you'd hold him back, and the calming effect you have on him is otherworldly. he calms down gradually and looks away from the ground and into your eyes, which are staring back into his. he blushes as he realizes how close he was this whole time, being near the prettiest person he's ever seen in the whole world, he refuses to believe this isn't a dream that just feels all too real.
"i, oh, sorry, i got... too close back there..." he'd whisper as he pulls away, BUT YOU'D PULL HIM BACK CLOSE TO YOU <333 "and i want you to stay close to me, pete."
HIS BLUSH WOULD REACH DOWN HIS NECK WHEN YOU'D SAY AND DO STUFF LIKE THAT
at the viking, peter would've been a little confused what exactly it was like. and when you explained it, he'd think, "oh, so like a swing?" and you wouldn't wanna intimidate or scare him at first, so you'd just reluctantly agree. "y... eah, yeah like a... like a swing!" you'd encourage him and he's watch the other people riding it and smiling to himself as he thinks, "oh, i can't wait to ride a big swing"
IT WASN'T JUST A SWING, HE GOT A LITTLE FRIGHTENED AND ANXIOUS AS THE RIDE JUST KEPT GOING HIGHER AND HIGHER (despite being spider man and being at really high places, he wants to be on the ground most of the time) SO HE HELD ON TO YOUR HAND THE HIGHER YOU GUYS GOT
"LOVE YOU PROMISED ME THIS WOULD BE LIKE A LIKE A SWING" "it is though, isn't it?!" "NO, SWINGS DON'T MAKE ME FEEL LIKE--" (screams)
but he enjoyed it a lot when he got a little more used to it, and besides, he got to use his fear as an excuse to hug you :>
THE ROLLERCOASTER WAS THE REAL KICKER THOUGH, i believe he threw up at least three times after getting on
HE'D BE TOO SCARED TO SCREAM HERE AFTER GETTING ON THE VIKING, he'd probably have fainted back in his seat when you two would do the upside-down part of the loop de loop.
and if the rollercoaster ride provided pictures during the ride, you'd laugh a little seeing peter knocked out while you're screaming out of excitement and a little fear.
"that was horrifying... wanna... go again?"
a/n: man i have date ideas for the atsv guys at amusement parks/fairs now fuck THANK YOU FOR THE IDEA ANON IT WAS SO LOVELY TO DO <333
tags !! @thecoolerdor @miguelswifey04 @sabcandoit @binibinileonara @k4tsu3 @fictarian @luvstarrstruck @maxoloqy @connors-cumslurper @ii01vq
86 notes · View notes
brisquad-unit-4402 · 1 year
Note
Hi! I saw your requests were open so if I may, can I request an Ike scenario or fic where he buys this huge Miku body plush or smth (cause we all know he loves Miku 🤭) and it kinda annoys reader at night since there’s like no space for them to sleep anymore 🥲. And like after a while reader just decides to sleep on the couch for the night and Ike comes up to them and reader finally confronts him about it.
I’m sorry if it sounds so specific but this certain idea has been keeping me awake at night 💀😭
And any reader is fine like (but most preferably female reader)
Thank you so much for your time <3
miku please don't take him just because you can
shoutout to this tweet for being the first thing i thought of when i saw this request. do you guys remember the supermassive miku plush that released around this time last year? that’s what i based ike’s miku off of because it’s so cute and. i gotta level with you. ike would be the perfect boyfriend and i would be so blessed to have him in my life and if the only condition is that he has to hog the bed with that three foot miku plushie i would go shopping for a comfier couch
tags: fluff, comedy, crack treated seriously, gender neutral reader
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
You stare down at Hatsune Miku. You’re surprised that you don’t have to lower your neck as much as you are. When your boyfriend told you he was going to order a giant Miku, you were expecting a body pillow or a tall figurine. You certainly didn’t see the three-foot-tall plush coming. Her head ends a little bit above your hips, and she sits perfectly on the ground, balanced by her outstretched legs and beanbag pigtails. 
“Yeah,” you say. “That’s Miku.”
“Miku,” Ike repeats, absolutely riveted. You see the sparkles in his eye through his glasses as he sits next to her. When he crouches down, he’s somehow a few inches shorter than her, and only then do you realize just how massive she is. 
You both think of the song reference and sing in time. “Oo-ee-oo!”
Ike hugs Miku from the side. His face squishes against Miku’s, and the cuteness is doubled. “She’s so soft. Feel how soft she is, Reader.”
You comply. Sure enough, Miku is made from a cozy minky fabric that feels nice no matter which way you rub the plush. She has just enough give that you can hug her comfortably, but she keeps her shape no matter how tight you grab around her. 
“I love how they did her eyes,” you say. “They’re so detailed, but they don’t look uncanny.”
Ike buries his face into the Miku void. “I think this is the best purchase I’ve ever made.”
You play with the pigtail on your side of the Miku plush. You wouldn’t call yourself a huge Vocaloid fan- that’s Ike’s thing- but you know enough about it to keep up in a conversation with your boyfriend, as well as understand just how deep his love for Miku runs. It’s never been a problem for you in your relationship, though. She’s a fictional character, after all, and you’re not immune to hot characters in your favorite shows and games either. You get to openly simp over your favorite love interests in light novels and Ike gets his Miku merch. It’s an equal dichotomy. After all, there’s nothing more attractive than when Ike gets passionate about something and takes about it nonstop, and if Vocaloid is one of those things, then you welcome it with open arms.
You raise the pigtail just a few inches off the ground before letting it drop. It plops with a satisfying noise from the beanbag texture inside. “Welcome to our family, Miku.”
.  . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆
Usually you’re the last to get to bed, even when considering both yours and Ike’s awful sleep schedules. Sometimes your work and hobbies keep you up way longer than intended, and so by the time you climb into bed Ike is already asleep. He looks even more angelic than usual when he sleeps all covered in blankets, and you get to admire the gentle parts of his face that this glasses usually hide in the day. 
You enter the bedroom after finishing your nightly routine, and you’re greeted by an adorable sight. On his side of the bed, Ike is fast asleep, but in less blankets than usual to make room for Miku. One arm is wrapped lazily around her, while one of his legs holds her close to his body as he rests. Miku’s head plops right underneath his chest, so you get an eyeful of one innocent face right on top of another.
For a moment, you don’t even want to disturb the peace, so you take a photo with your phone instead to immortalize the moments before you climb into bed. Even though it takes you some adjusting to get used to the giant Miku body, you finally contort your body and fall asleep.
.  . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆
You wake up the next morning crumpled up on the far side of the bed. Ike is nowhere to be seen, nor is Miku. You don’t think too much of it; after all, you’re the last to fall asleep, so it makes sense you’d be the last to rise as well. Besides, you have work today. 
You get ready for the day, and once you’re presentable you step out into the living room on the way out the door. You finally find Ike. He sits on the floor as he reads a book, and uses Miku as a back pillow. He placed her arms around his shoulders, and he looks delightfully comfy.
“Heading out, Reader?” Ike perks up when he notices you walk by out of the corner of his vision.
You throw on your jacket. “Yep. Work starts soon. I think I’ll run a few errands before I get home, too.”
“Alright. Be safe,” he says. As you pass Ike, you crouch down and kiss him. He’s always smiling whenever you part. “I love you.”
“I love you too,” you say. “I’ll see you later this evening.”
.  . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆
You spend dinner and the evening together before working alone at night. Ike’s known to have bouts of creativity and write some of his best story beats when it’s late, and you have some things to type up on your computer for work, anyways.
Once again, you’re the last to get to bed, but you’re just in time before Ike falls into deep sleep, and just like last night he’s clutching the Miku plush. You shuffle under the covers. Ike doesn’t open his eyes, but hums sleepily. His voice is soft and low. “G’night, Reader. G’night, Miku.”
“Sleep well, Ike,” you whisper. You gently push aside one of Miku’s pigtails as you try to get comfortable, before the other plops down right over your body. “Miku.”
Miku’s innocent face stares into your soul. She’s cute, but you have to be honest, last night’s sleep wasn’t the comfiest in the world. Miku takes up a lot of room on the bed, and since you’re always the last to enter you’re usually shoved off to the side to make room for Miku in the middle.
But also, Ike looks so serene, and you don’t want to wake him up again.
You brush Mku’s pigtail away, careful not to disturb your boyfriend, and wriggle into the best position you can. You still feel cramped, but it’s not like you can do any better. Miku keeps staring at you as you fall asleep.
.  . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆
Another day passes and another night comes, but this time, you come prepared. You decide to get to bed early and stake your claim before Miku can. You fall asleep as soon as possible, comfortably nestled under the blankets but with enough room for Ike and Miku once they’re ready for bed.
…You wake up in the middle of the night with a snort. Your body is too hot to be comfortable, and when you blearily open your eyes you realize why. Ike must’ve let go of Miku during the night, so she tumbled out of his grasp and over your face. She looks at you with those beautifully embroidered eyes. 
I can’t win, you silently brood. You squint through a gap between Miku’s plush body. Ike is fast asleep, but you can’t push Miku back to his side without disturbing him. 
You grumble a little while you move Miku around, careful not to wake the sleeping Ike. It’s a cautious ordeal, and you realize with dread that there’s no way to place Miku on the bed without her being on top of someone. You’re not a fan of the extra pressure on your body as you sleep, but Ike looks so comfortable, and you don’t have the heart nor energy to move her off the bed.
You give up. “Please don’t smother me again, Miku,” you quietly plead, and gently place her above the lover half of your body. It’s not exactly the best feeling in the world, but at least Miku isn’t covering your face.
You move your back to face away from Miku, pray your body isn’t too achy in the morning, and lull back to sleep.
When you wake up Miku is back in your face again. You grunt awake with morning in your voice. “I really can’t win.”
.  . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆
It’s been about a week since Miku first arrived in the household, and you have to be completely truthful to yourself here. You’re starting to worry if Miku is more of a priority to Ike than you. You haven’t mentioned Miku hogging the bed yet, but you’re getting used to how you wake up in the morning with sore joints from weird positions, and you hate it. 
Even in the day Ike spends more time and more time with Miku than the day before. You remember stepping out of your office during a break from work the other day, and noticing that Ike was playing video games by the TV, hugging Miku in his lap while he held the controller, just like how he used to do with you just last week. 
Another time you got home late from a work meeting out of the house and saw Miku sitting in a chair at the table like a dinner guest. The night before, you took a picture of yourself in bed while Ike cuddled Miku. Me, my boyfriend, and his 700 dollar, three-foot-tall Hatsune Miku, you captioned it. It was pretty funny, until you remembered that you still had to fall asleep and wake up by Miku’s iron fist. 
Today’s workload was a lot more than usual, and you had no hope of getting to bed in time before Miku did. Sure enough, when you entered the bedroom Ike and Miku were already sprawled across the mattress, and you only had a sliver of space left on your side. 
You had a long day, and you could’ve sworn Miku’s innocent eyes held smug contempt for you as you made eye contact.
“Am I getting Jolene’d?” You wondered aloud, still hushed so not to wake Ike. Well, two can play at that game. 
You grabbed a few extra blankets from the linen closet, snatched your pillow off your side of the bed, and went to the living room. Before long, you made yourself a resting place on the couch. It wasn’t the comfiest place in the world, but it would certainly be better than Miku’s domain, and you were too tired to ask for anything else.
.  . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆
You awoke with only a little bit of a crick in your neck. Improvement!
The second thing you detected after that, though, was the scent of bacon and maple syrup in the next room over, an utterly delicious combination. Your stomach growled. 
You rubbed the sleepy out of your eyes into the kitchen. You were greeted by Ike standing over the stove in an apron, halfway through flipping a pancake. He perked up when he noticed you. “Reader, there you are! Good morning!”
“Morning,” you say. Your voice is low with the grit of drowsiness. You take a seat at the table, and you notice Miku is nowhere to be seen. You barely close your eyes before you hear a dish slide in front of you. When you regain your sight you see Ike place a few strips of bacon on your plate of pancakes and move the maple syrup bottle across the table to you. “Thanks for breakfast.”
“You’re welcome. I’m just glad to see you. I got worried when I realized you weren’t in bed last night!” He chuckles a little, but everyone in the room can tell he’s a bit nervous. “About that. Um, Reader, can I ask? Why weren’t you in bad last night?”
On one hand, you’re relieved that Ike ripped the band-aid off before you did, but on the other hand, you remember you’re feeling envious of a Vocaloid plushie.
You sink your fork into a bite of pancake drizzled in syrup. “Miku,” you admit. “It’s just that she takes up so much space in our bed that I can’t get comfortable, and you don’t cuddle with me like you used to. It feels like you’re spending more time with her than me, you know?”
“I think I get it.” Ike sits at the table next to you. “Reader, are you jealous?”
“I’m aching, is what I am.” You pout and stuff your face with pancake so you don’t have to talk. It’s light and fluffy.
“You are!” Ike grabs your hand under the table. “Oh, Reader, you don’t have to hide it. It’s just adorable that you are.”
“My neck is sore, Ike.”
“Let me kiss it better.” He wraps his arms around you in a hug as he does, and when he’s done they still remain around you. “I know you’re irreplaceable, Miku or no Miku. I just hope you know it as well.”
“I know, it’s just that it’s harder to remember lately. We don’t spend nearly as much time together as we did before you bought her.”
“To be honest, I always thought that I was being a clingy nuisance. I bought her just because, but I realized I could hold her instead of annoying you for cuddles.”
That seems to wake you up. “Ike, you’re never a nuisance. And I never thought you were being annoying. I miss it a lot, actually.”
“That’s good. I never knew that it mattered to you as much as it does for me.” Ike presses another kiss to your forehead. “How’s this? I’ll finish up making breakfast, and we’ll play some games until you need to leave for work. Then when we’re in bed I’ll cuddle you as much as you want, no Miku required.”
“Sounds like a plan. And you can go ahead and hold Miku while I’m out of the house or whatever, just don’t forget about me, okay? I’m irreplaceable, right?”
“That you are. Now get back to eating before your pancakes get cold.”
Ike pats your head before he gets up and gets back to the stove, and you smile as you cut another slice of your pancakes. Miku or not, you’re grateful you have a boyfriend as thoughtful as Ike.
You eat the rest of your pancakes in victory. You look forward to having enough room in bed again.
.  . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆
209 notes · View notes
stayarmytinyzenmoa-l · 7 months
Text
NCT Spooky Season [Day 7]
Mischief Managed
Tumblr media
TW: Language, Ghosts, dead bodies, gun use, break-in-and-enter Genre: Comedy Pairing: Liu Yangyang x Reader YN Pronouns: Not specified Word Count: 1.0K Prompt: “Who says I can’t be a sexy ghost?”
[NCT Masterlist] | [NCT Spooky Season Masterlist] | [Yesterday] | [Tomorrow] | [Part 2] [Ao3 Link] | [Wattpad Link]
Notes: I can't ever write Yangyang as not your Bestie okay Prominence ruined me Disclaimer: Please remember that this is an AU and a work of fiction, obviously the idols mentioned/written about in this story would never partake in these actions. The idols mentioned in this work are meant to be seen more as face claims rather than the actual idols themselves.
Feedback is greatly appreciated!! Thank you for reading!
Tumblr media
"I still can't believe that of all the people I'd be spending a whole eternity with... it's with you," you watched Yangyang phase through walls repeatedly, changing his expression each time he came back and even once changing his whole outfit.
"Wasn't this the plan anyway?" He asks after finally settling down.
"I mean... I guess, yeah," you shrugged, looking down at your non-living body. "Still, though, I can't believe I died with you."
"And in such a lame way too," Yangyang tries to kick his own non-living body, but his foot just phases through just like with the wall. "Do we even know that guy?" He points at the burglar rummaging through your drawers. You shrugged.
"First of all, why the hell would I know him? Second of all, fuck you," you looked at him, "in comes a burglar with a gun, what do I expect? Best friend to pull me out of the way but no, he ducks behind me and I get shot first, then before he could move he got shot too so what's the point?!" You groaned.
"Yeah, fair, sorry I used you as a living shield," Yangyang floats over to the window but, when he tries to exit, he is thrown back into the flat.
"And we can never leave?! What kind of bullshit-"
"Hey! Okay, hold on, it can't all be bad," Yangyang floats over to you and wraps an arm around your shoulder, "how about we do some silly ghost stuff?" His eyebrows wiggle and you roll your eyes.
"Deal."
~
"The fuck?" The burglar pulls your desk apart. "These bitches don't have anything! Fuck, they really lived like this," he pulls your textbook out and rifles through the pages, he looks back at your motionless body. "You should thank me for putting you both out of your misery," he snickers. Then he hears something fall behind him and, when he turns back around to the desk, he noticed that he cup holding your pens and pencils had toppled over. "Huh..." he puts it back up and, once he does, he hears something else fall behind him and his head whips back, finding a sheet now thrown over the bodies as well as the lampshade toppled over. The burglar pauses and stares at the sheet before looking at the lampshade, which was still rocking back and forth from the impact of falling.
"Wack," the burglar shudders and goes back to ransacking your apartment, until he hears the dresser drawers fly open behind him and he walks backward until he hits the desk, grabbing onto it's edge for support, while clothes were thrown out of the dresser and into random parts of the room, and as soon as the nightstand fell over the burglar screamed and ran out of the apartment.
Meanwhile, you and Yangyang were losing your shit. Both of you were laughing your asses off like it was the funniest thing you'd ever seen, and to be honest it kind of was.
"Yo, Yang, quit rummaging through my clothes.
"I've been looking for this shirt," he pulls it out and, for a brief moment, it stays in his hold before it fell to the ground.
"Well, you found it, too bad you can't wear it anymore, dude," you shrugged and Yangyang groans.
"Oo... what's this?" He digs a little deeper and you walk toward him to see what he found and, in seconds, he pulls out the lingerie set and, if it could, you were sure your face would've heated up. "All for me?"
"Hell no," you groaned and, once you tugged it out of his grasp, you heard the sound of a thread snapping and the lingerie set fell to the floor. But, strangely enough, you were still holding the set, only this time a more ghostly version of it.
"How'd you do that?!" Yangyang tries to find his favorite sweaters now.
"It ripped and now I'm holding it? You held the set to your chest and looked in the mirror. "Ooh, Yang, maybe I can be a sexy ghost?"
"Found it!" He pulls a shirt out and hands it to you. Once you grabbed it, he took his side and yanked on it, causing the shirt to rip down the middle and allowing Yangyang to pull up a "dead" version of it. “Look at us! Let’s scare the shit out of whoever moves in next.”
“Oh, shit, here comes DJ,” you watched Xiaojun walk in and near scream his head off.
“Fuck, I forgot I invited him over,” Yangyang sighs. “Sorry, Dejun,” he folds his hands and you sat next to the spot Dejun fell over at.
“That idiot…” Dejun was in disbelief.
“I know,” you make a sorry attempt at consoling him.
“He was only supposed to kill Yangyang.”
“What?” Your hand lifts.
“What?!” Yangyang’s shout was louder.
Tumblr media
General Tag List: @stopeatread @bat-shark-repellant @raeincitizen @umbralhelwolf @yangsrose @kazooms @sadcoffeecritic 
NCT Tag List: @cherrylovr @minjiville 
If you want to be added to either tag list or removed just send me a reply to this post, and ask, or a DM and I’ll add you as soon as possible!
27 notes · View notes
thecluelessdoctor · 8 months
Text
i swear I don't mean to cause arguments, or anything of the sort in the FNAF community but I really need to get this off my chest about a certain ship popular in the fandom.
Now, the fnaf fandom has always had its hand full of immoral, strange, and toxic ships like most fandoms do. But I'm here to talk about William x Henry.
Please note I will be using facts I know, this isn't just opinion. I will also only be stating the vital events that help my point, because the rest is extras There also might be some events mixed up here, please just correct me on that *nicely*
Also if ur gonna say something, please don't be hating. Because you will be blocked, I don't care if you are a mutual or friend or not, you will be blocked if you try picking a fight.
ANYWAY.
So here is my thing with William x henry. I personally don't mind it too much but sometimes it bothers the hell out of me.
Let's talk about what we know about William and Henry's relationship. We know they were best friends and founded Fredbear's together, and then it is believed 83 happens, where even/chris/ what ever you call him, dies. So that'll fuck up any person so. Yk. ANYWAY, then William kills Charlie. So that's strike one right there, ofc Henry doesn't find out till later I believe but yk.
Now I thInk- when ever Fredbear's got shut down and the open Freddy fazebears is where Henry finds out anyway
Honestly Henry is stupid for not calling the cops like. Fucker you had the proof William murdered your daughter- AH YES LETS GO TO THE NEXT TOPIC- Henry here let's William go. Stupid ass- anyway, so what does William do? Change his name and decide in a British voice "I am going to become Henry's biggest problem."
I don't remember what happens but I am PRETTY SURE William does this in the toy animatronics pizzeria. Then the bite of 87 happens and it's like oh shit.
Now during this time, William finds out about reminant , which I find SO STUPID AND FORCED LIKE- HE CANT JUST BE A MAD MAN?? HE NEEDS TO HAVE A REASON FOR HIS KILLING?? anyway. Willie finds out about reminant and is like 'oo lemme go kill five more kids and watch what happens'
So yeah.
Oh and the fact William *according to what I have read* made Mike be a test subject. If that's not toxic and bad idk what is.
Anyway.
Stupid ass part one over here goes back to fazbears to harvest the remnant from the animatronics only to get himself killed YAY!
Anyway lets skip to FNaF... 6 I think. Henry/stupid ass part two quite literally trys to kill William again so like. These two are at each other's throats.
That's all I got for now- mostly because that's all I remember rn :') (jeez the FNAf lore is confusing)
I also have personal reasons on why the ship has a bad taste in my mouth but that's a different story.
Also, please note I AM NOT HATING ON YOU FOR ENJOYING THE SHIP. I just needed to get these thoughts out.
Also please, if you enjoy the ship and want to interact with me, try to refrain from bringing it up. Due to bad memories I will likely start unintentionally judging or disliking you and I don't want that
25 notes · View notes
Y'alls I'm reposting my work here because why not (please don't do so yourself though 🫶)
Link to the series I started: here
Tumblr media
"Leonardo Da Hamato!" I shouted from the living room. A clang sounded from the kitchen, followed by a fearful, "Yea?"
"Oo, Leo's in trouble." Mikey teased him as he emerged warily.
"What's up, Y/N?" Leo tilted his head as he walked closer to the couch I was on. "Come here."
He walked closer, suspicious. I made grabby hands at him and Leo held up his arms, now standing in front of me. "I haven't gotten a Leo hug in too long," I said simply, rising to my feet and grabbing his arms in a hug.
Leo paused before wrapping his hands around my back. "Geez, Y/N, you gave me a heart attack hollering like that." I chuckled into his plastron. "'s funny."
A few moments passed in silence, before- "Better than Raph's?"
I scoffed, before replying, "Different. Definitely number four on the list of things you're amazing at." I felt Leo's breath stutter in his chest at that before continuing. "Yea, you're great at hugs, but you're also hilarious, and charming, and a fucking badass in battles."
I pulled away long enough to glance at his face, which was gloriously flushed. "I could keep going?"
"No- no- no, um, I- uh, I already knew that," he stuttered, burying his face in my shoulder.
Should I be evil? Yes, obviously, me, duh. "I don't think you do, Blue," I began, slowly drumming my fingers on his shell. I smiled as he audibly gulped. He didn't need to know that I looked up red-eared slider facts, and learned that sliders flutter their fingers on other sliders as a sign of affection.
"Anyway, yea, you know, you're a crazy BAMF, and your jokes really light up the lair, and your sense of style is ON FLEEK," I intoned, getting a slightly wet chuckle in response.
"Plus, your leadership skills are getting really good. You know, I don't remember when I noticed it, but you've always been pretty good at analyzing situations and coming up with solutions that end favorably for us. It's really impressive to witness. That part might tie with the badassery," I continued. Leo's legs seemed to be shaking slightly, so I sat down slowly, letting go of the turtle to get comfortable. Leo turned, grabbing a pillow to hide his face in, practically a ball on the couch.
I smirked at him. "Shall I continue?"
He looked up slightly, glaring at me with the ferocity of a kitten. "Screw you," he mumbled, pillow muffling the words a bit.
"I'll take that as a yes-"
Leo whined loudly from the pillow, curling up even more around the pillow.
"Yea, you're just really cool, and when you wield your ōdachi you just look so surreal. It's amazing-" I was cut off with a pillow thrown at my face. I tossed it back laughing, but Leo dodged, pouting from the pillow he was hiding behind.
"Shame on you. Where'd all this confidence come from?"
"Oh darling, you don't understand. I have very little shame to begin with," I put on a posh English accent. It worked, Leo's eyes crinkling, though the smile was still hidden behind the pillow. I snapped my fingers. "Confidence! Confidence looks amazing on you as well!"
Leo groaned and dove back into the pillow. I could see the blush spreading past his cheeks. Mission success. As much as I enjoyed it, Mikey was probably finishing up with dinner.
Leo looked up again. "Y/N, why-"
"Because, Blue. You deserve the world. You all do, equally. Especially you, Leo. And I love you guys. I wanna make sure you know that, Leo. I-" I dropped my voice, locking eyes with him. "I know you have nightmares. You've been through a lot, and you've decided to and been forced to shoulder a lot. So if you even need to be reminded, you just have to ask."
Leo's eyes had widened, and were now searching mine for any, any signs of deception. I knew he would find none, and I smiled gently. His bottom lip trembled before tears began streaming down his face. The turtle looked down quickly, unable to maintain eye contact, but I didn't mind.
"Come 'ere, Baby Blue," I murmured softly, scooting closer. The sobs grew louder at the name as he clung to my shirt. I held him until they quieted with his grip softening.
"'s ok, Leo. It's ok to be vulnerable. I'm honored to be entrusted with that right now. I'd be honored to be someone, if not the one, you come to to get something off your chest. If not, that's fine. Emotions should never be a burden for one, Blue," I said softly, fluttering my fingers on the edge of his shell again as though it would drill it in. A few more minutes of silence passed as the shakiness in each of Leo's breaths disappeared. The turtle shifted and looked up at me again. "There's the Baby Blue," I cooed, cupping his face and fluttering my fingers. The blush dusting his face darkened again, and Leo looked away. "'m too tired for another breakdown," he yawned, pulling away to sit up. I chuckled.
"Mikey's probably close to being done with dinner," I said, standing. Leo followed slowly, but I stopped him. "I can and will keep reminding you. You deserve the world, champ," I added softly, poking him between the eyes. He looked down, embarrassed, and I grabbed his hand to lead him to the kitchen.
He paused at the entrance, and Mikey and I looked up at him. "I gotta- go to the bathroom!" he said loudly, before quickly walking off. "Don't fall in!" I hollered with a grin.
"Wouldn't dream of it!"
Mikey looked between the empty entrance and the spot I'd taken up. "SO... what was that?"
I shook my head slightly, smiling. "Just reminding Leo of his worth."
78 notes · View notes
clarajohnson · 5 months
Text
the magicians s2e3
eliot giving a real and that's what you missed on glee performance to start the episode
ta fucking da (i am in love with him)
rhinemann ultra is possibly my favorite spell name in this show. certainly the most memorable. i point at the screen when they say it.
lmao i forgot they didn't take care of the cursed thrones yet
if i had been abandoned in rural ren faire land with a spouse i didn't choose and my best friend and crush and crush's girlfriend returned with matching tattoos i would go crazy even without a cursed throne
oo-surpers... yoosurpers.
We're Fine :-l
god i hate to always be the one pointing out when these characters are hot but cursed throne quentin... is kind of hot
of course cursed throne alice is also hot but that's no different than any other alice
jesus you're acting like this is your first regicide
i forgot how often penny is on eccentric mega-personality genius babysitting duty
hiiiiiieeeee marina
she's literally the best i'm such a fan of her character this watch
I FORGOT MY BEST FRIEND HARVEY GUILLEN IS IN THIS !!!!!! BENEDICT I'M ALREADY SAD FOR YOU
i make maps, your majesty ??
be nicer to fen, penny, that's my (tumblr user han clarajohnson's) wife
a benevolent mommy who will solve my problems with her gaia problems? literally marina call me any time anyyyyyy time THE LEATHER SKIRT ARE YOU JOKING
i may truly skip the cupcake scene when it happens i'm already worried about it. it was genuinely my least favorite scene of the entire show last time.
you couldn't hit a fat girl with a fat-girl-seeking arrow... i like it but i don't love it
margo releasing her cacodemon that early is so crazy like without a curse i'm sure she never would've done it and it feels like the writers were just so enchanted by the concept they wanted to use it again. and then they like, didn't use it ever again lol?
you shot me, you cock !!!!!!!
ah yeah i will be skipping all the marina reynard stuff sorry
fen with a crossbow is very pleasing to me
sorry it's like 50% horniness and 50% i love how crazy this show is and what it lets all its characters do, you know?
what's best in life? to crush your enemies ??!!!! i love you cursed throne margo
is it wrong to say i find her death extremely satisfying WHAT DID SHE MEAN BY THAT
PLEASE the noise q makes when el extracts the syringe
alice being disturbed by feeling her cacodemon under her skin is so fun. high fantasy autistic texture aversion.
man it sucks skipping the marina reynard scenes because she's my best friend and wife of twenty years
love the cool dude magic music they use to really emphasize how fun tutting is
MARINA GET THE LEO BLADE DO IT DO ITTTTTT
once again alice is the most not-grown-up extremely mature child in the world tell me why she's about to save the entire fucking universe and she wants a sundae with gummy bears on top
all i can handle right now is a goddamn ice cream sundae !!!! this feels like a trap !!!!!
i remember hating q during this argument and i don't hate him now but it does still kill me that he thinks now is the time to have this conversation. also don't make alice cry quentin
idk how olivia taylor dudley does it but she has this wretched little about-to-cry voice that kills me every time
i have... befouled... the wellspring
god i so don't care for ember i find him unpleasant and unnecessarily grody but i do enjoy the weirdo wellspring twist
i, like the magicians writers, forgot that q incurs an injury for which he will lose an arm
to our pretty corpses :'-)
i love el and margo's casual intimacy they are the sweetest friends
in 2016 "full harry potter part seven slash eight" was still a funny joke. I Assume.
(everyone chanting) NIFFIN! NIFFIN! NIFFIN! NIFFIN! NIFFIN!
perhaps the most pathetic q has ever looked up until this point
if i had a nickel for every time a quinn child had niffined out...
can't not say it niffin alice is so scary hot
aw margo apologizing to alice is so sad once again this character has LAYERSSSSS
feels really revealing that q chose el and margo over alice idk
now i'm not going to say that between quentin and marina as characters i'd choose to change marina's death... but between marina and anyone else i'd choose marina
8 notes · View notes
leftduck9986 · 15 days
Text
Remember When The Pleasure Cruiser Morbillo Was Headed for Hawaii? The "Error" Fixed With Overdubbing.
Remember when, in Season One Episode Four, Captain Vincent, of the Pleasure Cruiser Morbillo is recording an audio log and his lips are saying, "Hawaii" but is overdubbed with "Havana"?
Tumblr media
Portraying Captain Vincent is David Morrissey, and to me it sounds like he had overdubbed his entire part.
That seems a lot of work just to mask one out-of-place word, though perhaps it would have been obvious otherwise?
Sigourney Weaver's "well screw that!" in the film Galaxy Quest went completely unnoticed by me until recently, re-watching as an adult! Her mouth shape is very obvious (and you can guess what word she actually said without having to go watch it).
However, the difference from what was originally spoken in this case, is more subtle.
Dear Diary - ahem, Captain's Log
The dictaphone microphone held close, he is speaking gently, "on the breath" or at half voice, "sotto voce"; his diction all focused at the front - "the tip of the tongue, the teeth, the lips". Mmm, great for ASMR. Would Shakespeare have praised him for speaking the lines trippingly?
Here's the line, "We were sailing south-southwest on course for Havana when we realised-" up close and slowed:
Tumblr media
There's no mistaking "Hawaii" with it's three - no, four - open vowel sounds ah-oo-ah-ee; there's no top teeth meeting the inner bottom lip for the "v" of Havana, nor the subtle jaw movements that would have accompanied the syllables.
Sailing SSW for Hawaii or Havana/Habana
If the original line is, "We were sailing south-southwest on course for Hawaii ..." then firstly, the Morbillo may have been travelling down the west coast of the USA, then eventually correcting to south-southwest. Makes sense, especially being in the North Pacific Ocean!!!
In S1E4, Saturday Morning Funtime, Atlantis rose from the sea floor, in the South Atlantic Ocean. Diagonally, A. Whole. Ocean. Away.
Tumblr media
That's a great big whopping error to make! Too big.
So, overdubbing with "Havana" changes things ever so slightly, but doesn't completely fix the situation.
Which Havana?
Travelling down the East coast of the USA now, makes sense for changing course south-southwest, headed for Havana CUBA, since Havana in eleven of the United States of America, can all be ruled out, being inland. So can Havana, Turkey.
A total of thirteen places in the world named Havana, and all of them are still too far north for Atlantis.
Just in case, all places spelled Habana are also too far north, or in the case of Habana Philippines or Habana Queensland Australia, are back in the Pacific Ocean.
Nowhere near Atlantis.
How to Draw Attention to Something: Make It Look Like An Error
Why make this particular "error" ? Well if it doesn't have anything to do with the Daily Specials Honolulu Roast sign, I'll eat my ... don't have a hat, not a hat person. I'll have a heaped teaspoon of Vegemite when the time comes.
Why insert errors at all? We humans loooove pointing out errors!
Ingrained from children's television, the Playschool song (whoops I mis-remembered, it was actually Sesame Street!: One of These Things is Not Like the Others then got sidetracked on youtube for a while: Classic Sesame Street 01 | Classic Sesame Street 02 | audio | Grouch Jazz | "Three of These Things Belong Together" | Barbershop parody.)
That's the point, to draw our attention. In Season Two especially there are plenty of errors to find, in the mis-spelling of words, names, the odd writing style of certain letters and numbers...
But here in season one is a potentially placed error, where the audio doesn't quite match the lip-flaps, and to discover this "error" opens up the possibility of there being another overdubbing mis-match to find somewhere.
Thanking @kimberleyjean for checking the Season One Script Book and the TV Companion for any mention of this error. There was none. Nothing at all in the TV Companion about the captain, the ship or Atlantis.
For anyone who owns the Season One DVD: is there anything said in the audio commentaries? Was there a trivia visual overlay?
3 notes · View notes
sushideception · 3 months
Text
Scent Memories: The Rubin Museum
A few months ago, I visited the Rubin Museum, a beautiful little gem of a place exhibiting Himalayan Buddhist art. One floor of the museum is dedicated to interactive exhibits; when I went, there was a row of monitors and a table at the back with books.
Each monitor had a little aperture at the top that sprayed a scented mist, and a screen that played a brief video presentation about the smell and what it meant to the artist who designed it (who knew there were scent artists?). One was the smell of earth after rain, one was the smell of a waterfall, I don't remember the others. The exhibit was about the link between smell and memory. The multimedia presentations were nice, but my favourite part was the back of the room, where there was a red table strewn with books and pencils.
They were blank white paperbacks, square, and each page was the same template: WHEN I SMELL ________, I REMEMBER _________
I couldn't stop reading the entries that visitors had filled out. They were funny, heartfelt, nostalgic, sweet, sad, homesick, beautiful. I wanted to steal one of the books but I knew it wouldn't be right--instead I scrawled my own entry and took photos of as many as I could before moving on. I've included all the photos I took, as well as transcriptions below.
Tumblr media
WHEN I SMELL Patchouli, I REMEMBER My mother
She was always wearing something that smelled this even if it was a cologne. I didn't like it. It embarrassed me because it was so strong. Now I miss it and think of her anytime I smell it
Tumblr media
WHEN I SMELL My grandmother's perfume, I REMEMBER the fun and special times we had together. I remember us doing movie night and making sandwiches + all sorts of fun.
I wish I knew what it was called.
Tumblr media
WHEN I SMELL wood/paint, I REMEMBER... [drawing of a hardware store]
Tumblr media
WHEN I SMELL Lilac, I REMEMBER the Lilac Bush in the driveway by the side of our house-- it was my moms favorite--
Tumblr media
WHEN I SMELL a smoke, I REMEMBER... home (Delhi), the smell of agarbhati always brings me back
Tumblr media
WHEN I SMELL Bushell's leaf tea, I REMEMBER My Nana's clothes and gifts she brought us when she visited. She would pack cardboard boxes of Bushell's leaf tea in between her clothes in her suitcase so we would have plenty of Australian tea in the US. We would gather round in our dressing gowns as soon as we got up and sip tea together. I still take Bushell's wherever I go in the world, and its scent and taste are calming and centering as I start my day.
Tumblr media
WHEN I SMELL Rose, I REMEMBER My grandmother who always wears Rose scented lotion. She is my inspiration and one of my favorite People.
Tumblr media
WHEN I SMELL chicken + rice, I REMEMBER my mom making her African chicken and rice on days when she didn't plan out dinner. My older sister and I hated when we could smell it cause we wanted to eat out at Chipotle or Chick-fil-a. Now I crave that meal and ask my mom to make it everytime I'm home from college
Tumblr media
WHEN I SMELL bleau (?) by Chanel*, I REMEMBER my old friend/prom date
*This is not an ad!
I moved to a new school for my senior year of high school & became good friends with this one boy. He liked to wear Bleau by Chanel and I'd steal his jacket from his locker - which we shared - and wear it for the rest of the day. He was also my date for prom - it was one of the best nights I've ever had.
Tumblr media Tumblr media
WHEN I SMELL corn chip, I REMEMBER my dog Jade and taking a nap with her. Very peaceful she always smells like corn chips :)
Tumblr media
WHEN I SMELL GOJO, I REMEMBER... DAD WASHING HIS HANDS AT THE LEE MYLES IN OAKDALE
Tumblr media
WHEN I SMELL ~20°F cold winter air, I REMEMBER walking home from the bus stop in the suburbs of Illinois. I like winter but also one of my most vivid memories walking home is slipping on black ice + falling on my ass. [my mind creature]
Tumblr media
WHEN I SMELL Diptyque OLENE, I REMEMBER... Oo. I think of you, and that summer that seemed endless. I remember the sunshine and the green grapevines
I remember you smoking in front of me, speaking out your feelings about me. I remember me knowing nothing about our path but still feel infinite happiness. Sometimes I hope I could stay there and never wake up from that sweet dream. I'll just keep this a secret.
Tumblr media
WHEN I SMELL apples, I REMEMBER San Francisco
I spent a summer working in SF. Nothing glamorous, but I was in love. With a new city, my newfound individuality, with possiblity. That summer I developed an allergy to apples, which made me more sad than I'd like to admit. I also got my heart broken. I always remember SF fondly, though.
Tumblr media
WHEN I SMELL stinky tofu, I REMEMBER summers in my childhood spent running around Beijing with friends I had made off of the street without a care in the world
Tumblr media
WHEN I SMELL mitsubishi wall AC, I REMEMBER...
[Chai! Chai! Chai!
The motherland right after power comes back on]
Tumblr media
WHEN I SMELL Jazz Club, I REMEMBER... Christmastime datenight in a rooftop glass cabin in the South Seaport. Red wine flowing, fake fire burning, grad school fatigue and covid anxiety, brussel sprouts and mac n cheese.
Tumblr media
WHEN I SMELL Contradiction, I REMEMBER The bottle of Calvin Klein perfume I received from a lover during a getaway in Venice in 2000. The perfume has since been discontinued but I keep the 23-year old bottle in a drawer in my old bedroom in Brooklyn to savor at random times when I want to think of that life-altering trip. I recall the mist over the lagoon at dawn as my vaporetto brought me close to shore. Then my mind drifts to the bedroom in the Hotel Campanello where I received the bottle...
I hope you enjoyed these as much as I did. I didn't take a photo of what I added to the book; but when I smell basil, I remember going out to the backyard to pick basil in the summer so my mom could make pesto. I would fill up a big metal bowl with the shiny leaves. My hands always smelled fragrant and floral afterwards.
0 notes
arakaei · 1 year
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Issey: Alam mo what's funny is he's been brooding about this girl all these years, for almost twenty years with me, and still not over.
Gab: Why are you saying this to me?
Issey: Gab listen, some things you love and they're yours forever. It's not about letting go or moving on because they never really leave. Nag-iiwan sila ng butas sayo. They leave a void, and you carry that void with you, always. Hindi na mawawala 'yon.
Gab: Hindi ko maintindihan, what are you saying?
Issey: I mean it's a matter of growing up. You don't move on, you just become a bigger person until that void doesn't feel as big.
Tumblr media
Issey:
So Jimmy kailan na ang balik mo?
So ano 'to? Surprise na lang?
Basta maghihintay lang ako?
Hindi ako natatakot, ano ba?
It's not scary it just feels weird you know. Parang pointless maghintay kasi parang wala pero meron naman talaga akong hinihintay.
Tumblr media
Issey: So, nakita mo na ba yung hinahanap mo at bumalik ka na?
Jimmy: Oo.
Issey: Tapos?
Jimmy: Nakita ko. 'Yun.
Issey: Won't you tell me kung paano mo nakita? Kailan mo nakita? How does it feel to finally be at the end of your decades long research?
Jimmy: Parang may namatay sa loob ko.
Tumblr media
"Mag-isa, ganito nakakarating sa pinanggagalingan, hindi naman pag-lingon. May puntong babasagin mo ang sarili at wawasakin ang lahat ng nagtatali sa'yo hanggang mag-isa ka na lang. Pagkat kapag handa ka nang mag-isa, saka mo makikita ang kailangang makita. Laging ganito. Nasa pinakamagandang panahon ka ng buhay mo ay wala kang muwang. 'Di mo alam naroon ka na. Sapagkat naghihintay ka, may katiyakan sa loob ng mayroon pang darating. Naghihintay ka nang naghihintay at magugulat ka, lumipas na ang panahong 'yon. Lahat ng hinintay mo ay dumating na pala. Waring may hangin na dumaan lang at natangay lahat ng hinihintay mo. Tinalikuran ka na ng hinaharap mo. 'Pag lumingon ka, ang nililingon mo pala ay ang patutunguhan mo na."
these are my favorite scenes from the movie Dagitab by Giancarlo Abrahan. there’s just something about it that fascinated me so much that it has been my favorite Filipino movie for years now. some may say that some part of it is somewhat pretentious, but i still find it well-written and appreciates its beauty as a form of art and for what it is.
these scenes connect to me in a much deeper sense to which i can say that the dialogues hit too close to home. i relate to it for the most part and it puts my very feelings into words in the most poetic way which i really loved.
i guess this is just very sentimental to me because i shared this film with you when you were still here with us and back then, i didn’t really think i fully understand it when i first watched it. if only you were still here, i’d be telling you what i think now that i watched it again.
but you know? i just think that maybe jimmy has finally found the closure he’s been seeking for decades. the fact that issey stayed with him and waited all throughout those 20 years despite knowing he’s still not over lorena, shows how much issey loves him.
when he said “parang may namatay sa loob ko” probably meant that he was at the end of his decade long research and that he finally managed let go of the weights of the past, made peace with it, and moved on.
after watching it again, i can’t help but ponder about it and funny how it only made me think of you. i missed our conversations about things like these. i miss hearing your thoughts and the way you try and explain them to me each and every time even though i was reluctant to share mine sometimes. there were also times that we’d argue about it but then we’ll just agree to disagree eventually.
i remember sharing to you that one-line issey said: “Some things you love and they're yours forever. It's not about letting go or moving on because they never really leave. Nag-iiwan sila ng butas sayo. They leave a void, and you carry that void with you, always. Hindi na mawawala 'yon.”  i just thought i hope you know you’ll be mine forever. you’ll always be that person who left a void in me that only you can fill and i know that i will live carrying it with me for the rest of my life.
0 notes
tielt · 2 years
Text
This weird OCD fever dream is perhaps well described by a friends similar expression of one who said, "I dreamed I had to put on wet socks." Spoiler break for the four-bar tetris block dropped on the wrong side of the screen rendition & for a stupidly-long shanty-rant. ye bin warned.
Slept in and was running late to a final exam. With a ways to go yet, I was headed by what was my current go-to for food cafe. I sat down outside and saw a friend come out to take my order. As I was waiting my anxiety about the final stewed, no-one came outside for quite some time and it felt that for whatever reason it was not comprehendable to disturb the patrons inside. There was food on the table that was not anything I would order; oddly & without a delivery. It seemed abruptly true that it was already too late for me to make the exam. Suddenly instinct overwhelmed my `good` senses, I stood up having eaten much of the meal which I recognized as some permutation I uniquely detested, nautious.
Briskly I hurried away towards the school. "Who was the waitress," thinking she simultaneously looked like both off the Indian women I spent several years working beside, "I don't have prosopagnosia ...weird". Strangely the path ahead was unfamiliar. A grassy hill tapered downhill and out of sight. Need to hurry it's in this direction. Suddenly, I remembered I didn't pay, and regardless that it was a close friend this was serious trouble, "...could I ever return." Simultaneous to this new knowing that I had to turn back, my feet slipped and the way ahead after a short distance was a pitch black void rectangle in my visual field that could only be described as being an event horizon of a black hole.
Somehow I regained my senses many miles downhill and away from both desparate destinations, near where they charge you a fiver to get to the airport in East Oakland. Disdainfully realizing I forgot my wallet and my bike on the street near where I ate, I was overwhelmed by the feeling, "you can't get there from here." ...
After waking up and sidescrolling and cat petting for a bit, the best part of the day even if impregnated with depression, I got in the shower. After washing my face as I usually do first off, I got that sensation that you get after washing your hands before you've dried them, but on my face. "Is this the bad place"
...
like fuuuuuuuuuuuck, that lucille font isn't a gruesome enough tone.
Stupid-world problem. This may have happened because I spent an entire day redialling my Zsa moonlander, which if you've ever quit the qwerty keys even temporarily you understand how it feels; what even were humans before. I guess as a programmer you have a hard version, did you know we use every symbol on the typical keyboard in a seemingly irreplacable way? I suppose some Chinese, Japanese, Indian programmers or their likeness are absolute wizards at extreme variations |& english. Though what I'm up to is attempting to retire my right hand to do work purely for the devil; I'm kidding I have brain damage; it retired itself. I have been somewhat successful in applying absurd density to my left wing, I plan to document the trials and failures when my configuration stabilizes a bit farther, every change costs a lot and it is often hard to see the value of the commitment. It takes maybe a year to not be shit. I use dynamic code snippets a lot now and have a pile of bash aliases/scripts.
Now that I've explicated it's virtue, here is our sponsor Zsa. Of course I'm kidding, they did however replace a device I was honest about my accidentally breaking of, also they seamed to on the day of reporting it, fix a firmware bug that was disruptive. Way better experience than I expected. A lot of super-users in tech and entertainment are their patrons i think or was it from them i heard that. They have my poisoned endorsement regardless. oof, it is hard being ugly.
I had this joke scene play in my head one day, of re-enacting the sword-fight from Princess Bride with a friend of mine who also has M.S. When reaching the point, "I'm going to tell you something you do not know, I am not left handed." Then i'd start flailing about like a used car-lot gumbi baloon or as if I am a robot made by Simone Giertz. They would then visibly struggle as if against the air itself and then follow that with, "I will also," and then flail about as I did. I imagine someone seeing that without ever watching Princess Bride. Oof, it takes all kinds is a profoundly stupid statement. Look what you did, now we have Hitler to thank for all this wonder. "Stuff white people like" is an abuse of the narrative, don't they know where this rope we're hanging our-self with came from. The only people who've ever tasted a real party were in Berlin when the wall came down that is where the real techno came from, duh.
ActuallllY. Not everyone is an artist.
So a bunch of frat boys wanted to create a site to rate how pretty each bitch they know is.
Now we are all that bitch.
Rimshot, I'll be here all night.
Being trans really jostles that joke.
Not sure if meta is the principle I mean maybe it's recursive because there is something self referential, but it's only funny cause the expression itself invokes some vaguely ironic attribute aside non-vague camp that would really prefer to be more sentient than is allowed to be in binary. Don't bite the hand that doesn't feed you, wait what fresh hell is this.
A coworker I worked with at a cafe once told me "the entirety of Finnegans Wake was written while James Joyce was having a whiz."
Not sure how or why, but this edge-lord claim has managed have serious long term affects. I'm not saying I believed it but at this point I've spent half my life wondering and I need a professional or an adult.
Perhaps it's been the fact that of the thousands of times up till recently I've thought about this I didn't care to pick it up to try to ascertain the odd claim to be true nor to check out literature of a centuries most well known writer being in the midst of his chaos-lord stage. It took him a decade to write it right? I also have no idea if this came up in a class as actual discourse, or if it was an official q-anon miss-information network packet. Cracks me up trying to learn about it cause there are these random guru types espousing it to transcendental extra-elevated subliminality. Is it like the conservatives "noble savage" rhetoric, but for cat-lords? Are they serious? Truly bizarre from my perspective. This is a poem I wrote for my friend, hope you're still hilarious. I am still casually protecting my ignorance to keep your dream alive.
nerve torrents - eddies tension of surface - chaos of making concious locality a flux unit or measure of thunk Algol focus of attention on a tensor regulation of memory for compute/io tension is there an entity in the universe that can thunk once how many sig. digits could be enough to move TF on or is a quanta not integrate-able or seperable of context how could anything be not context is the entire universe a quanta like this? could the universe be one very long run on sentence would even a Frenchman say god is of their likeness someone made the decision to do that thing the naked gun? the invasion of Russia? "full of sound and fury signifying nothing" much ado in the elevator Shakespeare just departed can you really not get a gift that keep on giving from a toilet seat if we had ears near our junk would we call an std a ear worm surface tension is only the illusion of security the future can only be determined yesterday can there truly be a hard edge or closure to anything, ever if time were reversed, would Hawking radiation be of certainty I'm not a docter, but nether am I is yodeling an act of violence meat tenderizers make perfect sense "a life on the colonies awaits"
...
If a tree falls in typescript was it modern techno feudalism or just the normal kind. Maybe there will be a in hindsight 2020 moment but we're probably already past that which; wait who owns the robot army. Anyway i quit video games many months ago to do some seriously oops I'm broke again; flossing. I'm exhausted, it is difficult to see why even, when you mostly burning energy to flux your brain plasticity; again. This WALL-OF-TEXT was brought to the service of all humankind by one hand.
~angelic organs~
Did you know that people in Japan don't believe they will ever not wear masks in public again? Even students. After spending time there and living with an ex-pat partner, I don't think I understood or I guess fully believed that they live by the saying, "You see a nail sticking out you hammer it in." In inversion architecture, basically it's like a friend of mine who came to the U.S. said that she was made uncomfortable that the buildings are all directly | vertical | quite unlike Venezuela, but conceptually imagined for properness of people. I guess I didn't entirely `believe` something could be a cultural absolute that isn't a general human absolute; like in that way. I'm a real gringo after all.
I'd like to re-recommend Severance as a real mood for anyone who's facing reintegration debilitation and ready to look the inherent violence of corpo life in the face. I guess cause it's the ones that you know. Considering a more centrist they/them approach because I'm honestly running on fumes but I know that would be even harder. Started going by she/they towards the end of my last job, but i think it was suitable because it I felt I could become casually enby after getting to know my captors. Might actually have to move if I don't find work in PDX, ugh stress. Hi I am zeta, & I'm on the spectrum. Which spectrum? All positions... Don't apologize for being yourself I think is good advice, do we do that to fake being humble? How do you humble without performativity? We literally don't suddenly fly to pieces because there is enough of us and everything else to wait what is this a peanut gallery or molten lava. Never-mind the complete ignorance of the 'weak' force that keeps everything from imploding. ok, so I'm feeling my keys are configured better now. Renton moment - now I just need another hit o the caffeine then I will be ready to code pfft, choose life!
0 notes
demonbanisher · 2 years
Note
Could you maybe do a proposal during school years for Wolfstar? Like they’re in sixth or seventh and one of them proposes and maybe they get secretly married or something. Idk.
Oo this is an interesting one I've never thought of an at school proposal/wedding! Hope you enjoy!
They are eleven the first time. It starts out as a joke that somehow morphs into Remus wrapped in a makeshift wedding gown made out of bedsheets walking towards Sirius who is wearing some sort of bug as a bowtie. James and Pete hold their sides from laughter as their friends play up the whole bit. They pronounce them "the kings of pranking" and Sirius dramatically attempts to dip Remus before slipping. They end up on the floor in a heap, cackling at their own ridiculousness.
But then they are seventeen, and laughter feels so far away. School is ending and there is a war just outside those doors. Their first real kiss was years ago now although without the dramatic dip. It was in a broom closet when hiding out from Filch. Suddenly, there wasn't enough air. Suddenly, any distance between them is too great, which is exactly why Remus is so excited when he hears the door to the room of requirement creak open. Remus has only been gone two days to visit his family and yet he missed Sirius so much.
Sirius is running as soon as he see him and Remus just beams and lets Sirius pick him up and spin the two of them around before putting him down so he can plant kisses all over his neck.
Later, they lounge on the giant bed. Sirius's head over Remus's heart and he's thinking about how fragile this all is, how at any moment that steady rise and fall could just stop and he doesn't know much about his future but he does know this: he wants Remus in it. For as long as they have, he wants them to be together.
"Marry me," Sirius says and he can feel the stutter in Remus's chest.
"What?" Remus asks, his hand stilling in Sirius's hair.
"Marry me. That's where we're heading, right? Why should we wait?"
"Pads, you know we can't..."
"Who cares? We're in a magic castle and it's you and me and that's all that really matters."
Sirius hears the smile break into Remus's voice. "You know James is going to kill us for not letting him be here."
"He got a chance to witness us in our wedding best six years ago," Sirius says, remembering that day with Remus in his arms as they all lay on the floor laughing. A future they didn't know they were predicting. "Is that a yes Moony?"
"Of course it's a yes! It always has been," Remus says as he leans down to give Sirius a kiss.
There's a faint hum and then a branch sprouts from the floor beside where they lay and grows up to reach them. Two delicate rings hang from its branches.
"These look flimsy," Sirius says as he sits up to pluck them from the plant."
"Who cares?" Remus says, "Our love isn't."
And Sirius smiles at that as he turns back to face Remus. "Do you take me to be your lawfully wedded husband?"
"I don't know about the lawful part, but I think we've broken worse rules over the years. So yes. Absolutely."
Sirius smiles and slides one of the rings over Remus's finger, worried that the delicately woven twig might snap. He hands Remus the other one.
"Do you, Sirius Black, take me to be your criminally wedded husband?"
"Yes," Sirius says, as he holds his hand out so that Remus can place the ring on it.
When he does, the rings on both of their hands tighten, thorns sprouting to draw blood and then they wilt and crumble away from their hands leaving a gold ring of runes glowing around their ring fingers before fading into their skin.
"Whoa," Sirius says as they both stare at their hands.
Remus breaks the spell first looking up at Sirius with adoration in his eyes. "I think you forgot to kiss the groom."
"I think I did," Sirius says as he leans into Remus.
When their lips touch there is a burst of light and as they come out of the kiss they both look to see their magical rings glowing again before fading away.
"Hm," Remus says, "our little secret then."
"For now, yes," Sirius tells him. "For now I just want you."
44 notes · View notes
thera-daydreams · 3 years
Text
KABILANG BUHAY
× A TRESE ONESHOT ×
[Crispin x Ghost!Reader]
Tumblr media
📝 Summary: Your demigod husband remembers you—everything about you—and how much he absolutely loved you. He remembers everything, including the memory that hurt the most.
📌 Warning: Contains fluff, angst, character death, and mentions of violence (because an angry Crispin being the son of a wargod is bound to shed some blood somewhere). Masakit po talaga 'tong songfic na 'to, trust me. If you don't want to get hurt, scroll awaaaay. Pero if you want maximum 1000% ultra heavy pain, then listen to the song below on repeat while reading, too.
Song: Kabilang Buhay by Bandang Lapis
(word count: 5,642)
Tumblr media
"Masasayang mga araw na kasama kita."
Warm. Crispin always remembered you to be so warm—every single part of you. The heat of your skin against his whenever he held you, that whimsical sparkle in your eyes whenever you saw the little joys in life, that sprightly curve of your lips whenever you two teased each other, and the radiance he saw from you whenever you were around the people you loved.
In his eyes, there was always a halo around your head or a beam of light following you around. Perhaps he was biased; perhaps he saw you through rose-tinted glasses, but it didn't matter to him. To the demigod, you were everything he ever wanted.
You were the one.
You were also one of the sweetest people he'd ever met. Every morning without a fail, there would always be a hot cup of kape and a plate of pandesal on the table—not only for him, but for everyone else in your little family, too. Alexandra, Hank, and of course, his younger brother Basilio. Even before you became his girlfriend, you'd treated them as your own loved ones.
That was the day he knew you were truly the one for him. The one who he wanted to spend the rest of his life with. The one he wanted to build a home with. The woman he wanted to marry and have children with, if you were okay with it (when that conversation came, you said you would be happy and honored to be his wife).
Crispin said it was the other way around. It was he who was fortunate and honored to be your husband. You'd laughed in response, kissing his cheek. There were no fancy rings or a formal, elaborate proposal involved, but that day—he remembered clearly that you had that conversation on a chilly December 1st, 9:24PM, right before you two went to bed—was an unspoken promise.
You two would be inseparable and together 'til death do you part.
Going back to that coffee and bread, he always wondered how you managed to keep it so fresh (you said it was a secret, but later on you spilled the beans to him after him pestering you). Even if he woke up at noon because of missions with his bossing and his brother, palaging mainit ang kape at pandesal. You must have had some sort of superpower you weren't telling him (you rolled your eyes, telling him that superpower came in the form of a microwave).
"Paglalambing at kulit mo na hindi nakakasawa."
He was by no means clingy or touch-starved, but whenever he was around you, he had the need to at least hold you in any way. Sometimes, it was the usual PDA (Basilio and Maliksi teased him about it, but he didn't care if it meant having some sort of contact with you; Alexandra just let it be because she knew how much you two loved each other). In public, you guys toned it down—settling with holding hands or you just linking your arm through his. If he was driving the car, his hand would either be innocently resting on your thigh or your hand which was on your lap. If you were the one driving the car, then it would be your hand on his thigh or his hand. He loved to draw circles on your skin whenever he was daydreaming or starting to doze off, too.
You as a couple often expressed your love for each other in different ways, and not just by saying it out loud. One thing Crispin adored the most about your relationship was the way you voicelessly said "I love you". If it wasn't clear enough that acts of service was one of your love languages, then he could understand that you loved him back through three taps.
Tap. Tap. Tap.
At first, he had no clue what it meant. You just kept doing it whenever you were near him, on whatever body part you could touch. If he was driving? Tap, tap, tap on his thigh. If he was the one cooking? You'd hug him from behind and then one of your fingers would go tap, tap, tap on his waist. If you were eating together? You'd take his palm then just... tap, tap, tap while chewing on whatever food it was you had in your mouth.
He recalled that afternoon you guys were eating at a simple Japanese place. While you slurped up some of the wheat noodles and the savory soup, you were excitedly doing a little happy dance as you ate—the one you did whenever you ate something you found yummy. Frankly, Crispin found it endearing. He, too, was guzzling down some of the ramen when you reached out for his hand then laid it on the table palm up.
With a mischievous smile and your puffed up cheeks looking like a chipmunk from the noodles you'd gobbled up, you gently tapped his palm with your index finger, that same glint in your eye whenever you did that gesture.
"... Anong ginagawa mo, mahal?" Crispin chuckled, a brow raised. He found it cute but he had no idea what it was supposed to stand for.
"Wala lang," you mysteriously answered in a muffled voice, swallowing.
"You know, you shouldn't talk when your mouth is full," he pointed out, amused. You snorted, gulping.
"Not my fault you asked a question, Crispin," you retorted, shoving in another bite of noodley goodness with your chopsticks. You did a mini-wiggle when the umami flavor exploded on your tongue (the ramen was bussin', bestie). Ratatouille would be impressed!
"But seriously, what does the tap stand for?" your boyfriend wondered. You did it again. Tap, tap, tap.
"Isn't it obvious?" you smiled. He then sweat-dropped.
"Wait, keep smiling," Crispin leaned over the table, removing a tiny bit of the dahon sibuyas stuck on one of your front teeth with his nail. He then popped that finger into his mouth, making you blink at the action.
"Ay, may naiwan pala. Hehehehehe." With how long you two have been dating, you were no longer embarrassed if you did get anything stuck in your teeth and he had to get it out (it's happened in more occasions than you could count). You did the same to him (and trust me, you were way past the stage of getting grossed out from the gross habits couples did). At least you two were a hundred percent comfortable and open to one another, right? Sanaol.
Crispin nodded, going back to eating his noodles, "Okay, back to the topic. What does this—" He tapped your palm the same way you did. "—even mean?"
Your grin just grew wider then you whispered into his ear, "I love you."
"... I love you, too," he answered automatically, still not understanding. "But what do the taps mean? You keep doing it and—"
You did it again on his hand.
"I." Tap.
"Love." Tap.
"You." Tap.
At long last, that look of realization came upon his features, "... Aaaaaaaaah."
You chuckled, all brightness and merriness from your revelation to the man you loved. "Gets mo na, mahal?"
He scratched the back of his head sheepishly, "Oo, mahal. Hehe."
"... Can we order another bowl of ramen? Please?" With those puppy-dog eyes? Crispin could never resist. He'd rip the world apart for you and build it back up from scratch if you wanted him to.
That was how deep his love was for you. Kapag nagmamahal ang isang diyos, walang imposible... 'di ba?
He was already raising a hand to call for a waiter, "Sure. Basta maubos mo."
"... And if half lang maubos ko?"
He sighed, "... Edi ako kakain sa anong maiiwan." What was the saying whenever you found your soulmate? Oh, yes.
True love is getting fat together.
Maybe it was true for both of you.
When you two exited the ramen place, you patted your bloated tummy. "Haaaay, busog na busog si food baby," you sighed in happiness, adjusting the the top of your high-waisted skirt to loosen it up for more space. You elbowed him slightly, wiggling your eyebrows at him and mimicking Kylie Jenner, "Soooo, I'm thirty-four weeks today."
"'Luh, ang drama mo," Crispin snickered, poking your rounded side playfully and making you pout. "Nagdadalang tao ka pala, ha. Ako ang tatay pero hindi mo sinabi sa akin na buntis ka." He wouldn't lie, but thoughts of you being pregnant with a child warmed his entire being. Mini-yous and mini-hims running around.
What a dream.
"Nagdadalang tae lang po, manong," you stuck your tongue out at him, then stopped. He stopped walking, too, looking at you questioningly.
"What? What's wrong?"
"Mahal?" you paused. Gulugulugulugulu. Oh no. Mayday, mayday!
"Did you forget something at the restaurant?" he asked. You shook your head in response, telling him there was an emergency.
"... Mahal, natatae ako."
"Like, now?" You nodded at him with wide, doe-like irises. His eyes crinkled, finding the situation hilarious. "Really? Oh shit. Literally. Is this because we were talking about poop?"
Crispin could only cackle as you rummaged through your bag for some wet wipes (and the situation led to you two running around the mall like psychos looking for the nearest restroom—grabe ang cold sweat mo, sis; it was that type of pooping session).
As he waited outside the women's comfort room, he found himself smiling like a weirdo from your date today. Nagdadalang tae o nagdadalang tao, he wouldn't love you any other way.
"Punong-puno ng ligaya ang ating pagsasama."
He found himself unconsciously doing the tapping to you, as well. Tap. Tap. Tap. He only now realized how many times you've been saying "I love you" everyday. Usually, you'd only verbally say it out loud three times: in the morning waking up, whenever he left for a mission, or the times you went to sleep together (because of the nature of his work, it was uncommon, but if he was at home during the night, he'd make sure to say it to you). But now that he knew what the taps meant, he counted them for one week from Monday to Sunday.
You were sitting on the couch, on your stomach and sprawled vertically over his lap. He was watching a basketball game on television while you were on your phone, scrolling through Facebook. It was all quiet until he tapped his finger thrice on your calf. You beamed, rolling over to face him then gently tapping his cheek three times—not with your fingers, but with your hands, smooshing his cheeks then pecking his lips.
"Fwifee-hweif," he said. You tilted your head at him, letting go of his cheeks.
"What was that?" you curiously inquired.
"Fifty-eight," Crispin gave you his signature flirty grin. "You tapped me one hundred seventy-four times today. And one hundred seventy-four divided by three—because I love you has three syllables—is equal to fifty-eight." His affectionate gaze to you softened. "Mahal, you've told me I love you fifty-eight times today."
You just hugged him and hid your face in his neck, "I love you, too, manooooong."
"... Wanna watch a K-drama tonight?" he said, his voice rumbling through his chest as you laid your head on it.
"Mmhmm."
You guys ended up binging Scarlet Heart Ryeo and bawling your eyes out (Crispin cried louder than you, actually, and the box of tissues was passed back n' forth between you two).
"Punyeta, walang Season Two?" Crispin cursed, blowing his nose.
You hiccupped, shaking your head and scrolling through the categories, "W-Wala e-eh, m-mahal."
"Seryoso ka ba?" he gaped, wiping his tears after wiping yours. "That's how it ends?"
You nodded, sniffling, "Uh-huh."
The next morning, when all of you gathered in the kitchen for breakfast, Alexandra and the others could only stare, nagtataka kung bakit namamaga ang mga mata niyo (yeah, they were swollen as hell).
"... Anyare sa inyo?" Alexandra quizzed. Hank, while pouring everyone some juice, had a worried look on his face, too.
"Nag-away ba kayong dalawa, Kuya?" Basilio questioned. You both shook your head simultaneously.
"Hindi," Crispin shortly answered, exhausted from crying with you all night.
"Nanood lang kami ng K-drama," you supplied, as worn out as your boyfriend was.
"Aaaaaaah."
"Na parang wala nang sisira ng lahat."
The date always held some significance to him, not only because it meant only a few days before Christmas but also because it was the day you promised to one another that you'd be endgame.
December 1st.
It would repeat in his head over and over again until the day he died.
The two of you were lying in bed, the cold night air entering through the open windows. You were leaning on his chest in-between his lap, reading The Count of Monte Cristo. He noticed that your expression often shifted between being giddy to being angry or smug at what was happening to the main character.
"... Mahal?"
"Yeah?" you responded, not taking your eyes off the novel. You flipped another page.
"What kind of ring do you want? Para alam ko kung magkano ang iiponin ko?" he quietly asked, his thumb caressing your temple. Normally, men wanted this to be a surprise or didn't talk about this but he only wanted you to have something you'd cherish for the rest of your life. You tilted your head back to look up at him. "Do you want those with the big gems or the smaller and simpler ones?"
You gazed back at your novel, then sat up and closed it, turning to look at him. "Crispin." You took his hands in your own (he tapped it thrice, making a teeny smile creep up your lips). "Hindi ko kailangan ng singsing."
His eyes grew wide, "... Are you sure? You don't want to be formally married?"
You frantically shook your head, "Nooooooo, noooo! That's not what I meant, dummy. I just wanted to tell you that I don't need an expensive ring to be yours." You kissed him. "And to be your wife."
"Pero—"
"Mahal, if we ever do have kids, mahal ang gatas, diaper, at tuition," you childishly told him. "Kung magpapakasal tayo, I don't need a huge proposal or a big wedding. Let's put the funds away for a house and for the future, 'mkay?"
"... But you won't have a ring," he sulked.
Getting an idea, you hopped off the bed and open your cabinet, finding a piece of durable string on one of your shirts. With a strong tug, it came off. You walked back towards your boyfriend, flopping back down then looping it on your left ring finger. You held your hand up to him, "There. I have a ring now, see?"
Crispin had never ever loved anyone as much as he did right now. There was a nagging feeling at the back of his head, though. "... I feel like I've seen this in a movie before, mahal."
"Duuuuh. I got the idea from the Count of Monte Cristo. Mercedes promises herself to Dantes with a string ring! Sorry nalang if copyright infringement ang ginawa ko, hihi." You showed him the book you were reading, the smile not disappearing from your face. Feeling ecstatic, he kissed you passionately right on the spot.
"Ipapangako mo sa akin na magsasama tayo nang walang hanggan?" Crispin whispered against your lips. "Magpakailanman?"
You kissed him, rolling your eyes, "Oo na, Crispin. Corny mo talaga, manong. Such a hopeless romantic, like me!" Another kiss. "I'll stay with you forever and ever and eveeeeeer and grow old with you. We'll get that rest house in the mountains, travel the world together, win the lotto, and do anything we want!" you declared determinedly.
"Promise? Talaga?"
You grinned, wriggling your little finger, "Pinky promise."
He linked his pinky with yours, "Okay. Pinky promise, wifey."
"Okaaaaay, hubby," you quipped, settling down and snuggling into him.
9:24PM, he saw the digital clock display before he pulled the covers over you both, keeping you warm and safe in his arms.
"Bakit pa dumating ang oras na ito?"
"Mahaaaaal, pauwi na ako. Huwag kang mag-alala," you quietly told Crispin over the phone. He was on another investigation, but while their bossing was speaking to Captain Guerrero and Lieutenant Tapia about the case, he used the spare time he had to check up on you.
You had been buying groceries, but knowing you, Crispin had a feeling you had gone to do some other errands.
"Pauwi ka na? Meaning, you're driving home?" He sighed, "And why are you whispering?"
"... Ehehehe," you nervously giggled.
"Anong ehehehehe?" the demigod asked you, suspicious. "Mahal, saan ka na ba talaga?"
"Nasa banko pa ako. Oopsies," you admitted shamelessly. "But I just finished paying the bills. I'm actually walking away from the counter now and—"
You suddenly stopped talking. For a second, the son of the wargod thought that the signal had gone bad.
"Mahal?"
Your voice had gone distant, but it seemed like it was talking to someone else. He strained to hear what you were saying.
"Hey, hey... shhhh, little one, huwag kang umiyak," he heard you say. Your voice seemed so far away. You seemed like you were trying to shush a person. A kid.
"I want my mom!" a child wailed.
"... Langga, come here. At huwag kang masyadong maingay." If it weren't for his heritage as a god, he would have barely been able to hear what you said.
Were you comforting a kid? Awww. He was about to just end the call then text you instead when another much louder and crueler voice could be heard over the phone. No, there wasn't only one voice. There were more.
"Mamatay kayong lahat! Balang araw, hindi na mga tao ang mamumuno sa mundong ito!"
Then there was a sound that was unmistakably a gunshot.
"Nabalitaan ko na wala ka na."
Bang!
His blood went cold. Almost every day he handled firearms in his line of work, so of course he knew what it sounded like. The shrieks and terrified shouts came after the gunshots.
Bang! Bang! Bang!
The last thing he heard were more gunshots, then the call ending.
He had never sprinted to Alexandra so fast before, frantically begging her to let him use the Dragon's Gate to teleport to wherever you were, even if it made him physically sick and nauseous.
Crispin didn't give a damn what happened to him, as long as nothing happened to you.
"Hindi ba't sabi mo hindi mo ko iiwan?"
It all happened so fast. One moment he was silently praying to Bathala for your safety while looking for you in the chaos. The next? He was scouring through the overwhelmed emergency room of the nearest hospital, where it was flooded with victims from the mall shooting.
It was a mess, with bleeding patients on the floor as nurses tried to assist. Others were seated on monobloc chairs that had been quickly put on the corridors. There was an overwhelming number of patients taken to the hospital either through ambulances or police cars themselves. It already began to stink of death, and Crispin hated it. His bloodlust as a wargod was creeping up his veins from the stench and his inner fury, but he held it in. He needed to find you first.
Behind him, Alexandra and Basilio were searching for you, too. When he told them what happened, they didn't hesitate to help and be transported to the mall as quick as possible. Captain Guerrero had already dispatched units after hearing what occurred (there was also an alarm that had blared in the station—a bank employee must have pressed an emergency button or something).
Surprisingly, in the midst of the havoc happening inside the hospital, he found himself walking towards the Trauma Bay of the hospital like a magnet. He had no idea where he was going, but he just kept going, and he stopped by a less crowded hallway. If he just went straight forward, he would be entering an operating room.
"Excuse me, coming through! Make some way!" It was a doctor who yelled from behind him. He turned around.
"Hindi papabayaan na ako'y mag-isa."
And as if time went by slower, he found you on a stretcher, being wheeled through the corridor as a nurse was on the bed with you, performing CPR. He saw the amount of blood gushing out of the bullet wounds on your body; one on your back, another on your stomach, and a third on your thigh.
Crispin couldn't help but run after them, asking one of the health professionals what was happening to you, "Nurse! Nurse, is she going to be okay!?"
"Are you her family?" they quickly interrogated. Alexandra and Basilio rounded the corner right as the nurse asked him that. Both held their breaths when they saw the tormenting state you were in, unconscious and on the brink of death.
The eldest demigod frenziedly nodded, "Yes, yes! I'm family!" He glanced at your bleeding form, and his heart clenched seeing the string ring on your finger, a bit of blood splattered over it. "I'm... I'm her husband! Asawa ko siya!"
You weren't formally or legally married yet, but to his eyes (and many of the others who knew you both), you were practically husband and wife.
"Good," the nurse said as they rushed you into the O.R., stopping Crispin from entering any further. "Sir, we need you to tell us your wife's name and her health details, please. She has to be operated on as soon as possible. We need her age, blood type, her comorbidities or allergies, if any..."
Crispin knew them all. He'd memorized them. And he told the nurses everything they needed for the operation. As long as it saved you, he'd say anything. Do anything.
"Hindi ba't sabi mo sabay tayong tatanda?"
It was a grueling operation, he could tell. Crispin had been pacing continuously in the waiting room, not even daring to sit from how anxious he was about you. Hank had come instantly to the hospital after hearing, and now there were three seated and extremely worried people watching him panic outside the operating room.
"God, please let her be okay," he continued to mumble to himself, fiddling with his fingers. "Please, please, please..."
"Kuya, umupo ka muna," Basilio tried to convince his brother.
"Oo nga," Hank frowned.
"You've been standing for five hours," Alexandra gave him a saddened look. "You should rest."
The older demigod shook his head, "I can't, bossing. Hindi pwede. Not until I know that she's okay."
As if on cue, the head surgeon came out of the operating room. Crispin nearly jolted and would have grabbed the man's collar had it not been for Alex and his brother holding him back, calming him down. No one could tell what he was about to say until he removed his surgical mask.
The four occupants waited for his response, antsy. The tension in the room was so thick it could be cut with a knife.
"Doc? Is she okay? Is she gonna be alright?" Crispin asked, troubled out of his mind. Alex's grip on his arm tightened, and so did Basilio's hold on his shoulder. "Doc, please say somethi—"
"... I'm sorry," the surgeon shook his head, a somber look on his face.
It was like the universe stopped for the demigod. The two people holding him were the only ones to support him when his knees buckled.
"We did everything we could. She lost too much blood, and the bullets hit too many vital organs," the doctor explained forlornly. "We performed CPR and a cardiac massage on her for thirty minutes, but she did not make it through the rest of the operation."
The words just echoed emptily through Crispin's ears.
"Bakit bigla ka na lang nandiyan sa kabilang buhay?"
When he entered the morgue alone, he didn't know why but he was expecting you to be sitting up and smiling, almost hearing your teasing voice telling him it was all a cruel prank. At first, that was what he saw. He saw the love of his life, soft skin flushed and curled up lips filled with so much love directed at him. He saw you radiant—glowing; that familiar twinkle in your magnificent eyes. He reached out to hold your left hand, awaiting its warmth.
Awaiting the three taps.
The taps that would tell him "I love you" and "I'm okay".
Crispin even waited a minute. Maybe you were still there, hanging on. Maybe... just maybe... you were fighting.
"Mahal?" he croaked out, squeezing your hand.
"Paano na ang lahat? Paano na ako, tayo?"
Those three taps never came. One minute. Five minutes. Ten minutes.
Only then did he really see you. The illusion all came crashing down.
Now your skin was so cold. So lifeless. So... opposite from what you were when you were alive. You were pale. Your lips were tinted blue. You were so still. So deathly still. Not one movement.
It freaked him out.
He couldn't believe it was you on that metal table—it didn't look like you. Where was the halo he always saw around your head? Where was that beam of light following you around?
His rose-tinted glasses suddenly became grey and dull. Taking your left hand, Crispin felt his heart shatter even more when his hand brushed the string ring on your finger. They had cleaned you up and made sure there was no blood left on your body, but nothing could remove those tiny, miniscule splatters that stained the string.
Remnants of what happened today.
You never did remove it. Even when showering or swimming or washing the dishes, you'd joked to him.
"See? 'Di ko nga kailangan ng singsing. Mas maganda pa nga 'to, eh. I can wear it all the time! Matibay pa!"
Crispin could nearly hear you, but it was all just a memory in his mind. God, he didn't want to forget your voice. Your laughter. Your cries. You whispering to him how much you loved him. He couldn't. He wouldn't be able to forgive himself if he did.
Both of you didn't even get to say "I love you" one last time. But reality was harsh, and this wasn't a movie where the leading characters could have a lengthy monologue confessing to each other as the dramatic scene was drawn out from seconds into minutes.
There were no camera angles, no music, no time left, and no happy endings. Everything was raw. Real.
"Hindi ba't sinabi mo sa akin na sabay tayong mangangarap?"
"Mahal," his voice trembled as he held your icy hand to his lips, kissing it. "Huwag mo akong iwan. What about us? Our dreams? Andami pa nating pangarap, 'di ba? Mga gustong gawin?"
No response.
"Tatatanda pa tayo, 'di ba? Bibili pa tayo ng bahay na nasa bundok... then we'll travel the world together, right? We've... We've saved up half of the funds! You... You can't leave now..."
Silence.
Crispin felt tears dripping down his face. He hadn't noticed he was crying. Only with you could he be a sniveling mess—around the others, he always had to be the kuya. The responsible one. The oldest one. The loyal bodyguard.
With you? He could be anything and you would never judge him.
Even when you were dead, he was still a sniveling mess in your arms.
"Sabi mo gusto mong manalo sa lotto," he choked out, cupping your cheeks. It was so strange to him; how colorless they were compared to how... spirited you were in life. "I'll do that... I'll make that happen. Just please... please come back to me. Gagawin ko ang lahat... bumalik ka sa akin, mahal. Mahal..."
Crispin told himself nothing was impossible when a god loved someone, yet now all this god could do was be paralyzed by his despair.
"Bakit bigla kang lumisan nang hindi man lang nagpaalam?"
They say there are five stages of grief. Denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. People don't talk enough about how they weren't actually stages. They were just five emotions and there was no particular order they came in. They would come and go, and that was how dealing with loss really was.
Today, as he was cradling his departed soulmate and the only woman he knew he'd ever love this much—reduced to tears while nursing his broken heart—he was feeling denial, bargaining, and depression all at once.
Only then did he allow himself to feel anger—just pure, unadulterated fury—when Alexandra let him and his brother unleash their bloodlust to the guilty aswang clan that had been the culprits of the mall shooting. The bank robbery.
He had his vengeance.
The son of the wargod nearly became a god of war that night, coming home soaked in the same crimson that dripped off his guns. He swore to himself he'd rip the world apart for you and build it back from scratch. Thus, Crispin was merciless to those who murdered you and all those other innocent humans.
He took his time watching the life dissipate out of their eyes, especially since he didn't see yours before you died. They were already closed when he got to the hospital too late.
Denial, anger, bargaining, and depression. He'd felt all that as time passed, on and off.
Acceptance? That last stage? That last emotion? Crispin never did really get to that point. Perhaps he would. Perhaps he wouldn't. Only more time would tell.
"Isang malamig na hangin ang yumakap sa akin."
The demigod sat under the tree that shaded your gravestone, a bouquet of white and red roses beside him while he relaxed on the grass. It was a classic symbol of true and everlasting love. That was the vow you'd made to one another, right?
December 1st.
It had been one year since your death. Wasn't it funny how the fates worked? Two years ago, on this very day, you two promised each other that you'd be together forever. He said that this day would be memorable to him until the day he died because technically, it was your engagement slash informal wedding anniversary.
Then one year ago, you had been shot trying to protect a child from those armed aswang. You saved the kid, alright. Crispin even made sure that the little boy, one of the lucky survivors of the shooting, wouldn't be targeted by the aswang. He ensured your sacrifice wouldn't be in vain. But what was supposed to be a marriage anniversary turned into your death anniversary.
December 1st.
The day would indeed be eternally ingrained into his mind.
But now, he could only dwell on nostalgia as he crouched and cleaned your gravestone, polishing it after removing all the grass and dirt. Engraved on it were the words beloved friend, sister, and wife.
Wife.
He really should have married you before you were declared dead. It didn't matter now; you would always be his wife, even in death.
On the left side of your gravestone was his mother's tombstone. He did the same, cleaning it and polishing it. When he was done, he tapped your gravestone thrice, "Una na ako, mahal. Paalam din, Ma. Baka hanapin pa ako ni bossing."
Tap. Tap. Tap.
He jerked, swerving around and standing up. He swore someone just touched his shoulder and—
Whoosh!
"Parang isang pahiwatig na magpapaalam ka na."
A gentle breeze came from behind him, where the tree was. Once more, he turned around.
Crispin didn't know what to do.
He thought he was dreaming, but he wasn't. He knew he wasn't. Not with the way your hand rested on his cheek. Not with how warm you felt.
Despite seeming almost transparent, you looked absolutely radiant, more so than when you were in life. If he was biased before about you having a halo and a beam of light following you around, now he wasn't (because you really did have a golden circle on your head and a candescent glow behind you).
You didn't speak, but again, you tapped your index finger thrice on his cheek. He was too stunned to react to the featherlight touch you had. It was almost nothing, but it was there. A ghostly tap, tap, tap.
"... Mahal?" he whispered.
You joyfully beamed at him (God, did you look divine), then planted a fragile kiss on his lips. You settled down on the roots of the tree and patted the patch of grass beside it. He sat down slowly. When he did, he removed his black gloves while you intertwined your hand with his.
On his left ring finger was a string ring made from that old shirt of yours. The same one you improvised your string ring from. It was how Crispin always remembered you and how he brought your memory everywhere with him.
Tap. Tap. Tap.
The triple tapping. Perhaps it was your way of wordlessly saying you loved him while simultaneously bidding him goodbye as a ghost. He didn't know. You couldn't speak (or he couldn't hear you), so you did what you could.
Tap. Tap. Tap.
Just that gesture every once in a while as you quietly listened to him tell you about his day.
When he had to leave, he saw you there by the tree, sitting and waving at him. The next time he came to visit, you were there. Always there, waiting.
And when you weren't, after a couple of decades, Crispin knew that it was time for him to let you go.
To let himself move on.
But that didn't mean he stopped hurting or stopped loving you. He could never stop loving you. Never.
Kahit kailangan ka niyang bitawan upang makapagpatuloy ka sa kabilang buhay, habangbuhay kang minahal ng isang diyos ng digmaan.
Tumblr media
× AUTHOR'S NOTE ×
Nasa mood kasi akong manakit ng tao (because ngayon ko lang pinanood ang mga pelikula ni Rico Yan & Claudine Barretto after his death; ang pait eh, right person but wrong time). Medyo sadista pala ako, haha. Ayun, pati ako umiiyak habang nagsusulat nito. Even when I was showering, I was still crying and blowing my nose out. Sana nagustuhan niyo kasi pati author niyo nasaktan sa ginawa niya. 🥲😅
And that tapping gesture was inspired by a random Reddit post I saw years ago. As someone whose love language ain't saying stuff out loud, that just really called out to me. Acts of service kasi akin, eh.
Anyways, I finished writing this at like, 12AM. I'll just edit the typos and errors tomorrow because I want to get this oneshot off my chest. Goodnight! 😂💤
Comments and constructive criticism are welcome! Likes and reblogs are very much appreciated, too! (Yes, you may also rant at me for this.) 💙
Tumblr media
TAGLIST: @belladaises @binibiningbabaylan @4kodzuk3n @sparklingmallow @severuslovebot @holyshxtangel @marinac15 @space-flamingo @pippethealien @kashasenpai @disappointmentpastry @hornehlittleweeblet2 @seijohoe @monimiin @ibelievein2dmensupremacy @tinybonksharkcop @hannalogies @banisuoh @genshin-idiot @lemonnie-kimmie @haliya-mori
175 notes · View notes
mahou-queen · 3 years
Text
⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚lolita fashion then vs now: how the fashion has changed over the last decade ˚୨୧⋆。˚ ⋆
I started getting into lolita fashion in 2010 and so much has changed in the fashion since then. Trends, websites, community opinions, etc. So I thought we should take a look into the past and reminisce about lolita fashion since 2010~~
Everything below is based on my personal experience and perceptions in the egl community. These are not necessarily facts, and other lolitas may not agree or relate to everything stated below. 
⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚˚୨୧⋆。˚ ⋆
✿❀Rectangle headdresses:
At the height of 2010-2012 sweet these types of headdresses were not in style. They were considered ita and absolutely taboo for new lolitas. At the time the community was trying really hard to separate themselves from lolita cosplay and maid cosplay which were both really popular at the time especially at cons where a lot of lolitas would also be. In recent years with the resurgence of old school lolita, rectangle headdresses are back in style and I personally couldn't be happier as I have always liked them. 
✿❀Animal ears:
Also considered ita and taboo for its associations with cosplay. Today we see a lot of animal ears, particularly bear and bunny, sometimes cat but not as much. Even big brands like angelic pretty are releasing animal ears regularly. While they can definitely still be ita if they are costume quality or irrelevant to a coord, they are definitely back in style and looking very cute
✿❀Chiffon half blouses:
The 2010 sweet era was all about cotton blouses. And while cotton blouses are still alive and well, these days we have the wonderful chiffon half blouse. Very comfortable, more size inclusive, light and pretty. These were not in style/ not widely available when i first got into lolita. 
✿❀Low collar blouses:
Absolutely existed, but were not as in as they are now. Peter pan collars and high necks were all the rage, these days with the prevalence of chiffon blouses, we are seeing a lot of slightly lower neck lines.
✿❀Chocolate explosion:
Around 2013, it seemed like every release was chocolate themed. All these chocolate prints came out in 2013:
Tumblr media
Angelic Pretty started transitioning into “sweet classic” around 2014 which was when I took a break from the fashion. 
✿❀Split wigs:
Split wigs were super popular in the early 2010s both in natural and unnatural color varieties. These day some people would say they’re ita but I think the fashion has come to a really nice place of balancing old and new styles so many loltias still wear split wigs and wear them well. 
✿❀Circle lenses:
When i got into lolita it seemed like circle lenses were almost mandatory. They were a part of every makeup tutorial, every popular lolitas coord, circle lenses were everywhere. I could never wear them due to my astigmatism so I was always upset about circle lenses. I am glad to see they have not been prominent in recent years.
✿❀Replicas:
It seemed like replicas were everywhere, everyone had one, they were generally accepted, and promoted by other lolitas. Dream of lolita was making replicas of all the major AP prints and filled the pages at clobbaonline, oo jia was a facebook based brand that made the most convincing replicas available. Replicas still exist but since 2011 major bans have been placed on reselling them and reputable resellers stopped carrying them for the most part. They are not celebrated and most lolitas are against them now. 
✿❀RTBU:
Refuse to be usual was a taobao reseller on ebay in the early 2010s. Idk if they are still around but i know they up-charged more than twice the price of the item. Secret shop tea parties were going for $95 on rtbu. They had hit or miss reviews and a lot of people didn't trust them. I never bought from them but i did window-shop
✿❀The only real resellers were clobbaonline and qutieland:
Clobba did not have a full website, only a gallery where you had to place your inquiry and order via email. These days clobba has a fully functional website with a wishlist and shopping cart feature. Qutieland no longer exists. These days we have seemingly endless taobao reseller options of varying quality
✿❀Egl comm sales:
I never figure out how this worked because lacemarket took over not too long after i got into the fashion. But it was an entire second hand market being run out of livejournal. It seemed very Intricate
✿❀Bodyline:
Ohhh bodyline in the early 2010s. The lace monsters, mr yan, the sundries department, the items never restocked, good times. I have 3 bodyline main pieces these days and I love them and plan to keep them for as long as i'm in the fashion because they are cute, comfortable, and the prints look good. There was a time in the mid 2010s where bodyline and people who wore bodyline were scoffed at and everyone who had only burandoo thought they were better than everyone else. But these days with the booming lolita industry in china (on taobao) and even western brands getting bigger, the emphasis on brand is becoming less and less and what makes good lolita is based more upon actual quality and coordination skills and less on the tag. 
✿❀My old dream dress list:
Tumblr media
I never got any of these and many of them would never fit me anyway. I did get sweetie violet but in lavender as I no longer like the sax colorway and I don't know why I ever did.
My favorite lolita online at the time was @herajika-blog
✿❀bonus:
Sweetrococo.com, does anyone remember this place? You could allegedly design a lolita dress yourself with any colors/prints/images from the internet and they would make it for you. I remember designing a my little pony skirt on the site for fun and not getting it because it was $200 LOL. I swear that site was a fever dream. 
⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧˚as we can see a lot had changed in the lolita fashion community and trends over the last decade. Do you remember any of these things? What is your experience? I really enjoyed this trip through memory lane. And while sometimes i miss the times when i was just starting out, these days the lolita community is so much more accepting, more accessible, and more experimental. It doesnt even seem like there are trends right now, just that any trends are ok as long as theyre lolita. What do you think?˚୨୧⋆。˚ ⋆
80 notes · View notes