being an avid vampire content consumer is like having an appreciation for queer undertones or straight up complex relations, beautiful biblical themes, clothing and people…but then also having half of that content be pure flaming garbage and not being able to look away

Y’all, since I have NO impulse control and I was very worried about spoilers, (don’t worry friends no spoilers from me) I went ahead and finished Dracula the book during this dry, no email period. And when even THAT wasn’t enough I decided to start watching a bunch of “Dracula” movies. So here are my noodle thoughts

The first one I tried was the 1992 Dracula with Winona Rider and Keanu Reeves. I have a whole other post explaining the intense emotions related to that movie but the three biggest opinions is that 1) it is VERY inaccurate to the book all the while acting like it is Very Faithful 2) younger Dracula looks like a goth Willy wonka 3) it was so wildly horny I couldn’t finish it. (I wish we had an alternative reality movie with the same cast that was a good book to movie adaption) Over all the disappointment was so strong that I was wary of trying any other movies

Momma didn’t raise no quitter tho so my husband convinced me to try the 1931 hour long Dracula and this ALSO was NOT LIKE the book but I forgave them for a lot after the drama of the last movie. Honestly for me the best part was Renfield. the actor was old timey attractive, quoted book renfield, and was in general a Mad Lad. I’m sure there are some spoilers to the book because this one covered Main Plot Points but everything is glossed over because it’s only an hour long. Also the actress for Mina was adorable and any vampire violence couldn’t be shown on screen because of the time period, Which I found to be rather charming. That being said their biggest sin was reducing my boi Jonathan to a literal SIDE CHARACTER. He wasn’t even a Lawyer 😭.

I watched Van Helsing the other night, and Hugh Jackman was The Best Part as a vampire hunting goth cowboy. At this point I had given up all hope of any movie being like the book which is good because this was DEFINITIVELY the REMIX. Over all I enjoyed the film (I want to know what shampoo Van Helsing uses because his hair was very luxurious) but it was SOOO not accurate to the book that anyone could watch it and still not have a clue as to what actually transpired in Bram Stokers telling.

It is rather odd to me that Dracula has inspired SO MANY MOVIES and yet as far as I can tell no one has sat down to create an accurate movie (or mini series). On one side the variety of movies is fun (I’ve seen Dracula untold and like it, though again it’s a very different retelling of Dracula) but on the other hand would it kill the directors to leave Van Helsing a middle aged man, have all three suitors, make Jonathan an ACTUAL MAIN CHARACTER, quote the book dialogue for more people then Renfield and let the horror slowly creep over everyone instead of investing in jump scares and crazy theatrics? Basically I want the people who made the six hour BBC Pride and Prejudice (that was faithful to the source material) to make a six hour Dracula (equally faithful to the source material 😂. )If anyone knows of a more or less faithful Dracula movie please let me know.

Hey its🍯!

Fine I guess I'll accept it if I really have to 😒😝

My days have been fine! Mostly working, nothing too exciting

Awww yeah thats totally fair, it's so weird to think that they've been going since 2001 😳

Ha ha yeah it's a tough decision to make, I don't even know what mine would be!

Unfortunately I am not great with horror! I'd like to watch it but I just never do or know what to watch. I did go see Renfield last night though. It was a lot of fun! 🦇

Also to jump onto the beverage debate, how do you feel about mint tea?🫖

(You may know who I am by now or maybe not :3)

Hey there 🫶🏼

You have to accept it!!!! 😌

I’m glad to hear that your day is going fine 🥰 I hope it gets much better as the day progresses!

I know right 😳 makes me feel hella old 😂 but the first one is still really good 😊

Wait does Renfield even count as a horror movie? I could of sworn it was a comedy 😂 then again I haven’t watched the movie yet.

I’ve never had mint tea before 👀 the better question is who’s side are you on 👀👀👀👀

(I do know who you are tho like you said it is a side blog 🤔 I do not know your main)

OBX2 spoilers ahead this is your warning‼️‼️

(also apologies i don’t know how to do the read more thing)

k so i really liked this season! except in the beginning i didn’t really like how it was mostly focused on john b and sarah like i get it, they’re trying to get the gold and it’s important but i mean my jj baby wasn’t there so it was low key boring for me💀💀

but anyways, YALL i realllly loved seeing the pogues in school like idk it just made me really happy seeing there dynamic in school and how they just give zero shits about what anyone thinks about them😁😁

k but i literally nearly had a heart attack when sarah got shot and basically died like my girl flat lined and somehow survived?? seriously she is immortal my god. and taking her to that sketchy ass doctor 😬😬not the brightest decision and when they just lost the gold all together made it seem kinda pointless

i really loved the whole thing with pope and the cross and stuff. like pope isn’t really my favorite character but i liked the plot line and it gave them something else to solve, though the creepy crutch lady (i forget her name lol) i did not fuck with her, she and renfield were not it for me

ok but literally everyone almost died multiple times and that really gave me so much unnecessary anxiety like i knew no one was gonna die because i just don’t think they would do that but some parts were pretty close. like sarah got shot and died and got resurrected, kie got stuck in the sewer thing, pope and the bees, john b nearly died in prison and my baby jj nearly drowned🥺🥺seriously i knew he wasn’t gonna die because of the scene in the trailer but it was close man 😬😬

ok while we’re on this let’s talk about kie and pope vs kie and jj. y’all when i tell you i cringed during the kie/pope scenes i- 🤮🤮 however, kie was being such a bitch to pope- like using him for his body and shit! really pope had a reason to be mad at her but i’m glad they “broke up” it was so awkward and i hated seeing jj third wheeling the whole time just like 👁👄👁 ok kie and jj😍😍honestly the jiara moments were pretty slim this season 😭 i loved the part when jj saw his dad and stuff it just reminded me of season 1 and it put me in my feels and like kie being all protective of him 🥰🥰 like every time they were together i was squeeling so hard!! omg when they were forced to stay in the crate together i was really hoping we would get a confession or something! but no, they really be doing this slow burn shit😩😩but i do think it’s good. it would be weird if kie jumped from every guy in the group all at once but jiara is endgame no denying. and obviously i LOVED the boat scene at the end- kie was so worried for him (SO WAS I OMG) and yeah

CLEO YALL I LOVED CLEO she did not get NEARLY enough screen time. she’s always just vibing and hanging around and just doing whatever tf she wants. a literal queen i love her so much. i’m so happy that she decided to help the pogues and go with them at the end and i really hope we get to see more of her in future seasons

ok but i HATE WARD AND RAFE (everyone does) but like i knew ward didn’t die like it was just too easy but i hate that he came back and just kept going on and on and on and on and on like god just stop PLEASE and rafe 😡😡😡i hate him SO much like just stop y’all are already rich as hell just like chill out for real i hate them

i was so frustrated tho when they lost the gold and then just gave up and started focusing on the cross and then lost it too. like it was all so pointless and frustrating and kinda got boring after awhile ngl i just hope in the next season we see more of them just vibing and chillin and being normal and causing normal teenager trouble on the island and then maybe the gold gets back to them somehow idk (also jj didn’t get his dog which was very disappointing my baby just needs something)

in conclusion i thought the season was good! the humor was there and hilarious and it wasn’t super cheesey or anything and i didn’t cringe the whole time (except for pope and kie🤮🤮🤮) 10/10 in my opinion thanks for listening to my rant ❤️❤️

wwdits episode 1x10 (finale) thoughts: 

guillermo working at a panera bread before becoming a vampire’s familiar? we stan. i love panera 

guillermo is self-aware of his lackey-ship. the mention of renfield was a nice touch too--wwdits awards its audience for consuming other vampire media w/ little easter eggs which is quite nice. also, as an aside--i wonder who thought a (i assume to be) taxidermied bear was a good interior decorating choice. probably laszlo & nadja tbh 

guillermo’s vampire-sona is great omg. also he’s an artist?? i love it! just another thing he has in common w/ nandor if we count the pilot & the glitter portrait thingy he did. personally a fan of ‘guillermo the great’ of all the options we were shown

i also wonder if we’ll get anymore dracula parallels--first the renfield reference & then we’ve got guillermo being a descendent of van hellsing. anyway, i’m glad that everyone’s favorite fan theory ended up being true--guillermo’s got a real knack for vampire killing & i’m curious if we’ll get a more serious exploration into this internal struggle (wanting to become a vampire vs. succumbing to his ‘nature,’ that of a vampire hunter) guillermo. in other words, can someone fight against their own destiny? 

awww, nandor’s excitement on having living descendants is super cute. he was so excited to be called a ‘grandpappy’ like alksdjfds i /love/ him. & at the end of the day, not even vampires can live alone--obviously family/culture/history is very important to nandor. 

since i thought the 37 wives line was a throwaway line, i wonder if the fact that nandor only ‘loved’ 35 of his wives has any importance. perhaps they’ll come back as vampires/some other supernatural creature? who knows 

oh also!!! slightly worried that since guillermo sent off the vampires’ dna, this will eventually come back to haunt them in the form of skilled vampire hunters. i mean surely vampire dna would look different/have diff markers than human dna? either way, y i k e s

nadja just carrying around a skull? once again, proving to be a favorite character of mine. this might’ve also been a slight nod to the end of the ep where poor gregor loses his head (again) but idk, it’s a stretch for sure

nandor’s “that wasn’t very nice,” when laszlo & nadja hissed at guillermo was a nice touch. in some ways nandor really is trying to make up for not defending guillermo in the night club... in his own way lol

colin being 100% white was so hilarious--i lowkey hope this was ad-libbed or something lmao 

laszlo better watch out lmao--w/ how he’s treating guillermo, it’s not gonna go well for him if guillermo has a change of heart & joins up a vampire hunter’s group next season (which i doubt would happen but u never know)

in madeline’s defense, if a floating vampire was tapping on my window saying “wakey wakey” while holding a stuffed bear i too would probably just,,, die 

nandor asking guillermo for help in pinpointing what emotion he was feeling (grief) was oddly sweet? he grew attached to madeline so quickly :’( unlike the other staten island vampires, nandor doesn’t seem to heed the ‘don’t get attached to humans’ rule too well. kinda reminds me of the ‘citezenship’ ep where he’s sad abt his home country not existing anymore & he lets his meal go. he still cares abt humans in a way that differs from laszlo & nadja (i.e., nadja immediately turns humans that she is interested in while laszlo has shown zero interest in any human at all).

shout out to the found family trope being represented w/ nadja, laszlo, colin, & guillermo coming to madeline’s funeral. i mean colin left early, but nadja & laszlo stayed for as long as they were physically able to. once again, nandor’s dedication to his bloodline is very sweet, going thru physical pain to say goodbye to madeline 

this ep really solidified how much laszlo & nadja love each other--poor gregor, but i’m sure he’ll be back next season in some capacity. whether thru mentions, flashback, or perhaps even as a zombie (since those were canon in the wwdits movie)? the topiary of nadja must’ve taken laszlo so long to make... we stan forever

the parallels between the finale and the pilot ep were /real/ for guillermo and nandor. while i think nandor has (somewhat) started to show his appreciation for guillermo more, he was upset & in pain so i’m not surprised he lashed out by booping guillermo’s nose & yelled at him. extending his time as a familiar for another yr tho? not nice D: 

this insinuates that nandor actually plans on turning guillermo eventually (like no offense to nandor but i don’t think he’s manipulative/vindictive enough to be stringing guillermo along forever). 

guillermo staking the portraits like oof, he looked so upset over it. i’m guessing that the fallout of submitting his dna (as well as the vamps) will be explored soemwhat in season 2. i could see one of guillermo’s relatives or something tracking him down bc they realize that he has van hellsing blood. like from what we’ve seen, it makes him a natural at killing vampires so... if i were a hunter, i’d want him on my team. & if i were a vampire... well, i’d want him dead. so next season should prove interesting for poor guillermo--maybe less of him being a familiar and more exploring his background, family, and strengths? idk; either way i’m excited™ 

blookmallow

i m also making dracula playlists... my renfield one only has like 6 songs rn tho (i dont even know whats on my dracula one i think theres like. 3 things :') but)

good!!!  i hope you will share them when you are done!!!