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doesthendnlive · 2 days

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I'm so tired. Sorry for bad grammar or mistakes.

TW for rape/pedophilia/slavery/domestic violence/violence against Indigenous women and girls specifically

It makes me so angry we Sacagawea and "Pocahontas" are known our figure head Native "Women". If you want to go a litter further the fact that "La Malinche" is idolized as well in the same way. But we don't learn about their actual lives.

Why are public schools obessed with these pedophilic relationships between Native girls and old gross ass white males as "The country coming together" or a "unity between 'Indians' and whites'" or "the creation of our mestizo race" or whatever else.

Sacagewa was only 12 when her "husband" bought her, and 16 when he impregnated her. I didn't learn this until I looked it up and searched for it myself.

"Charbonneau was also known for his short temper with his wives. On August 14, 1805, Charbonneau struck Sacagawea during a domestic argument, and was told to stop by Clark. This one incident has led to Charbonneau's reputation as a "wife beater," although it was the only time during the expedition that this type of behavior was noted. Coupled with the rape incident described above, however, Charbonneau seems to have been a sometimes violent person with little regard for women Native girls . His consistent record of marrying Native girls under age 16 also makes one wonder about a possible need to exhibit power over women Native girls

Charbonneau is known to have had a total of five wives, all young Native American women girls whom he married when they were sixteen years old or younger. He may have had more wives who have been lost to the record, however. His last known wife, an Assiniboine girl, was 14 when she married him in 1837; he was more than 70 years old."

Matoaka was even younger if I remember right, the bastardization of her real life story and the fetishization of her story and Native women and girls beause apparently we're all from her people. The fact the "Pocahontas" even exists, the disregard for her actual story and scraping details out to make it more palatable.

Despite the fact the she didn't get to have palatable, she had to endure violence, forced removal, rape, and forced impregnation by her rapist(s). She didn't get to have that comfort or safety but everyone else gets to when 'learning' about her.

"La Malinche" or "Malintzin" (we literally don't know her birth name) was around 11-16 years of age when she ended up on the hands of Spaniards

What makes it worse in regards of "Malintzin" is that Hispanic Males fetishize the "Mestizo race" and the rape of Indigenous women and girls especially to create this race.

They only claim their Indigenous decent when it benefits them, while they are still actively anti Indigenous themselves and hate actual indigenous peoples/communities.

Argentina specifically, it's called chineo, criollo males are known for targeting Indigenous women and girls to rape/gangrape them. It's a old colonial practice that still happens to this day.

Im just so angry that our figure Indigenous "women" are just these little girls adultified into these grown women just to make people less uncomfortable with the power dynamic imbalance and pedophilic relationships and colonialism and colonization in general

Racist white males (Spanish, English, French, whatever flavour of white idc) love this idea of conquering Indigenous women and raping them. I heard way too many gross comments from old white males with rapey undertones to them about them being white and me being a Indigenous girl.

Or even them mocking the sexual violence we face, one of my ex white male friends mocked me for being abused when we got into a argument not related to it at all he also was more and more racist to me as time went on.

In both of the Americas Indigenous people, but especially Indigenous Women and girls aren't safe. It's scary how much violence is forced onto us and how these figure head "Women" are watered down into comfortability for the general public.

The violence we face is pretty much the same in the Americas, and its scary to know we are stuck in places that hate us despite being on our lands in the first place.

all of this but THIS PART ESPECIALLY:

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ellecdc · 17 hours

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While I don't like to spend time feeding into negativity on my page, I received a rude/aggressive comment which, though it had been sent to me anonymously, I have reason to suspect who it might have been from; so while I'm not going to broadcast it, it prompted something that I would like to remind anyone who might need it [which is truly maybe only 0.02% of you]

I have been on this app for 4 months; I have gotten hundreds [if not thousands] of asks sent to me during that time and I have always made a solid effort to respond to anyone and everyone who has taken time out of their day to reach out to me or even leave comments on my fics because it truly means the world to me

Over the past 4 months and throughout the hundred [or thousands] of asks and just as many comments and messages, I have only ever received 2 negative/rude/insulting asks - both were sent anonymously, one I had responded to and one I have blocked

And while this blog has grown bigger than I have ever imagined possible for myself and I now receive the most number of asks and requests than I ever had before, I continue to try to stay active, diligent in my responses, and enthusiastic in my chats and conversations with you all

I will admit that I have many unanswered asks in my inbox right now from a large number of my mutuals, listed anons, and many more requests that I have been saving for when the inspiration hits - I cannot respond to everyone and everything all of the time and for the most part, people have been very understanding about that

Sometimes I save chats for later when I have the headspace for it, sometimes I'll answer on the whim, and sometimes I save simple chats that I actually think would make for a good fic idea!

But it's important to note that I don't owe anyone the explanation I just gave to you all

The people that you interact with on this app are just that - people

People who have good days and bad days, people who have jobs and lives and loved ones who take precedence, and people who don't actually owe you anything

This is true whether you're a mutual, whether you're a dutiful fan, whether you're a listed anon, or otherwise - blogs don't owe you anything

They don't owe you a response, they don't owe you their time or energy, and they don't owe you their 110% every time you interact with them

I give my best to every single person I have spoken to on here, and some days my best is better than other days. Sometimes I get so excited when I'm out with friends or at work when I notice an ask from someone - mutual, anon, or otherwise - that I reply immediately because I just cannot wait to chat. This means I'm not always sitting down at my computer and able to give every single response the same amount of time or effort because I am a) busy, b) perhaps a little distracted and c) human

But I don't owe anyone that explanation either

This blog has always felt like a super niche book club filled with likeminded people who loved the same things I do, loved the same characters that I do, and who enjoyed chatting about it. It has also felt like a fun and wholesome community that I am happy to be apart of

And while I like to think that my blog is a safe space for everyone and anyone who might want to visit it; it's a safe space for me first

This blog is my space and my safe haven; you are welcome to it - but that welcome is a privilege, not a right - and I am not obligated to cater it to you

Like I said, I have only ever received two rude asks, but even though 99.98% of my messages are positive, the negative ones feel the loudest

Please think before you send criticizing asks to any blog; the 'saddest' thing of all is being both cowardly and cruel to people you don't know

& again, as always, thank you all for being here with me 🫶

-L

#elle's boundaries #thank you for being here #& thank you if you've read this far

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honeytama · 1 day

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coming out as bisexual + pride fest headcanons 🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️

noah sebastian/bad omens x gender neutral! reader

a/n: *ty to @hedonists for the pic and @exitwoundsx & @somewhere-diamond for the ideas. also, if someone wants to write more on this please do. i'm gonna be feral all month long.

content: fluff and a lil bit of bi anxiety

coming out as bisexual

noah and yourself have been together for a few months

the beginning of your relationship felt like a honeymoon, but lately you’ve felt somewhat closed off and anxious

there was tension between you two up until having your first argument

the argument was about something silly, really, it could be fixed with just a bit more communication

but once you've made up, you take the chance of demonstrating your trust in him and your need to share your feelings by coming out to him, finally

“oh, you’re bi?,” his eyebrows raise. “is that why you’ve been acting weird? you wanted to tell me?” he smiles.

you confirm that’s why and tell him you didn’t want to hide that side of your life from him anymore. you felt better having opened up to him, but you didn't want him to think any differently of you.

“i understand. you're still, Y/N, to me..." he pauses. "um, what does being bi mean for you?” he asks, curious.

you explain what it means to you and explain that you still love him no matter your attraction to another gender.

“you love me, Y/N?” he smiles, wide. he looks like he’s won the lottery.

you say yes, begrudgingly. knowing he’ll tease you about it for the next week.

“i love you, too,” he takes his hand in yours. “thank you for telling me. i love everything about you, just so you know. your sexuality doesn't change who you are or how I feel about you. i'm proud of you for being honest with me, and for being true to yourself.”

a weight falls right off your shoulders and you finally feel like you can breathe.

"i'm here for you always."

going to pride fest with bad omens

with pride month coming around the corner, you get brave and ask your friends to come with you to pride fest in that city this weekend

of course, you say “if you don’t want to go, it’s totally okay” or “sorry, I’m just really excited.”

but noah assures you not to apologize. “yeah, that would be fun. we’d love to go with you. you’ll just have to show us the ropes,” you hear noah laugh over the phone.

june rolls around and you're at your place with your friends from bad omens getting ready to head out to the festival in the afternoon

folio brought his own kaleidoscope glasses and will choose to wear iridescent glitter on his shoulders and cheeks. he opts to apply it himself.

jolly decides he wants his hair in braids after hearing how hot it will be, so noah and you help him braid his hair into pigtails. he chooses from one of the pride tees you have in your closet. maybe "be gay, do crime"

nicky is super jealous of folio's glasses, but he distracts himself by letting you paint on his arms different pride flags. he makes a joke about him being the one being tattooed this time. his shirt says, "lesbians eat what?!"

noah really wants to go shirtless.

you don't allow him to, knowing he'll burn and regret it in the morning.

so he opts to wear a classic white tank. nicholas and you team up to give noah a glitter middle part in his hair.

the fest ends up being a blast and you feel so supported by your friends

they all follow around like ducks and ask you questions when they're curious

their favorite parts are the parade and the drag queen performances

you even had them stop at an atm before the fest to get some cash to tip the queens

AHHHH my heart

#noah sebastian x reader #bad omens #bad omens x reader #jolly karlsson x reader #nick folio x reader #nicholas ruffilo x reader

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queerprayers · 2 days

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1/2- Sorry if this is a weird ask. You're a person of sincere faith who doesn't judge and I'm desperate for outside opinions. I've recently learned that many modern tarot readers don't believe in divination or spirits, but rather that the images on the cards can help us think about things and bring out deeper ideas from our own subconscious. Zero future telling, only for self reflection. That sounds ok to me, and using the cards for visio divina has done really good things for my prayer life.

2/2- But still I worry- what if the more conservative types are right and all use of the cards is bad? What if it's displeasing to God? I beg and pray but I can't seem to find any peace or inner sense of guidance on the topic. Can you please pray for me, and share any wisdom you might have about this? Thank you so much.

Hello, beloved--I don't think this is weird at all! There's so much fearmongering among Christians about things being Satanic or pagan or whatever else, and it's important to not give into that panic while also taking our faith seriously.

None of the people I know who have been interested in tarot do it as a religious or really even spiritual practice--for most of them, it's been a fun thing, like getting your fortune read at a county fair, and it's not something to "believe in" so much as do and think about. I also know people who, as you said, find it useful for reflection, usually for finding new ways of looking at things. I'm not scared of tarot, and I don't think it's demonic.

Christian history is full of things like opening your Bible to a random page to see what God has in store for you or protecting yourself from evil spirits or saying a certain prayer so that a saint will do something for you. Everyone has these superstitious instincts, to find stories in chance, to not waste the few things that are in our control. I don't think there's inherent evil there--evil comes when we trust these things more than God, when we look in our own actions more than God's, when we think we can know the full story, when we try to pin God down. And I don't think superstition with Christian wrappings is any less superstitious, or any more truthful, to be honest.

A lot of people fearmongering about stuff like this are scared about where it might lead--that you'll end up somewhere chanting around a human sacrifice. And of course there are people who start with harmless religious experiences and end up in evil places--lots of Christians go to a potluck and end up believing in prosperity gospel and putting their kids in conversion therapy. But I don't hear you in danger of abandoning God or of harming anyone. And any religious practice can go too far, no matter how pure its roots. What you bring to the practice makes up most of whether you are reaching out toward God with it, and we can balance it with other traditions and other impulses.

In case someone's using the Bible to scare you: what the Bible tells us about fortune-telling/magic/communing with spirits is from a very specific Ancient Israelite perspective that I'm not qualified to unpack, but we don't find it an applicable worldview today. We have different ideas of how to live in community with other religions, and religious practices serve very different functions. We don't follow Ancient Israelite cultic practices--nor do modern Jewish people, for that matter. Christian practice has developed in the past two millennia in so many directions, and barely any of it would be recognizable to the Biblical authors. I obviously trust that God gave us these writings for a reason, and am not saying to ignore them--we can find useful ideas, but not a rule book.

The tarot deck most people know was created in 1909 by an occult secret society, who used symbols from Christianity and astrology. I think it's misguided to find truth in them as they exist, but neither do I think they're inherently evil--they're archetypes, stories. They're just human. I find occult secret societies generally more silly than demonic--although there is lots of racism/cultural appropriation in their histories. I respect those who avoid tarot based on its origins, just as I respect those who won't do yoga because it's a Hindu practice. But so many things come from non-Christian origins, and we cannot throw away the world if we want to live in community with it. (Yes, we are called to be set apart from the world as Christians, but also to love it--there is the line we must walk.)

There is real Biblical precedent for avoiding a practice associated with things outside of your faith--ancient Israelite religion was very concerned with these associations. Paul did not think meat that had originally been offered to pagan gods was sinful to eat, but basically advised people not to eat it because of how it would affect others or perhaps normalize idol worship. These are things we're continually navigating, and in any Christian community you're gonna have to be clear where your faith lies and probably answer some questions. I think it's a good thing that we're called to be purposeful, and to be aware how our actions affect others.

So my general advice would be to really think about it, to do it all purposefully, paying attention to how it affects your life, relationships, and practice, and whether it's bringing you to the life you know God wants from you (one of love). But this sounds like what you're already doing! I think you care more about this than most people I know, and you're coming to God genuinely--these are gifts.

Prayer is sensory, story-filled, interactive. It's a way of moving through the world. You say this has done good things for your prayer life, and I believe you. Contemplation is a major Christian prayer tradition. Anything can give us a new perspective, anything can shove us toward the truth. You're not causing harm, and neither are you abandoning your faith. There are other people navigating the same things as you--Contemplative Tarot is a book by a Catholic tarot practitioner, and it looks really interesting. I know people who have made their own tarot cards, and I wonder what that would look like with more intentional Christian symbolism/stories, even saints. Sometimes I pick a random prayer card to say--this is coincidence, and while it's not something I'm depending on, it does affect how my day goes.

Don't fall for anything or anyone that claims to know the ultimate truth, don't fall for the people who say that tarot has ancient Egyptian/kabbalah roots, don't fall for people who are just selling you things, don't believe anyone who tells you the truth is inside you if they aren't making clear that it's God that's living there, don't base your entire religious practice on something like this. But don't throw away a way of looking at things if God has led you through it. Don't put your life in the hands of cards, but move through your life with stories and new perspectives and contemplation. God's mercies are new every morning.

I don't know if I've given you peace--maybe just more questions. The good news is, you don't have to figure it all out now, and the bad news is you'll never figure it all out. Religious practice is a continuous dialogue and negotiation with the world. I have faith in you, and in the ways God is moving in your life. Bring Jesus with you, wherever you end up--he'll come regardless, of course, but see it happening. A man with a sword or a cup doesn't know your future, nor is he doing anything--but you know that. You're seeing more of the story, you're contemplating the wonders of God, you know the swords and cups that matter, and they are present with you, and seeing them everywhere is a gift.

Something my mother says before I start anything new, or go anywhere important--what she said when I went to the psych ward, and on the first days of school, and when I go to a protest--is "remember your baptism." I think my grandfather said it to her, too. I don't know whether you've been formally baptized, but remember your calling. Remember the beginning of your journey, and why you're still on it, and how you're being a representative of it. Remember your baptism, whatever that means to you. We have been marked with the cross of Christ forever.

<3 Johanna

#asks

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back-on-my-autistic-bullshit · 2 days

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Full Moon Stolitz thoughts

Alright I'm getting on this shit because I am obsessed with Stolitz unironically. Before I start this I want to be absolutely clear that (in my opinion) there is no "right" side in the overall situation between Blitz and Stolas. Both equally have problems that contribute to their miscommunication and I can sympathise with both of them. If you disagree, feel free to ignore this post and scroll on, I don't mind friendly debate with people I know well but strangers on the internet are a different story.

I do generally project heavily onto Blitz which yeah probably impacts my interpretation of this a lot but I'm just a guy on tumblr I'm not here to be 100% right I'm just posing my take on their behaviours etc etc

Mandatory Disclaimer: spoilers start below! Do not click read more if you care about spoilers for The Full Moon episode of Helluva Boss

That all said, I'm splitting this into three parts:

Blitz's behaviour throughout the episode

Stolas' behaviour throughout the episode

Blitz and Stolas' confrontation/argument/interaction at the end of the episode

Part One: Blitz's behaviour

Starting off with "When I See Him", the basics of it (that is played up a bit for comedy and more or less directly stated really at the start) is that Blitz is obviously covering up how he really feels by concentrating entirely on the sex he anticipates having, and acting like that is what is important to him.

Are we okay? Can't really say I'm getting by By avoiding his questions It's so complicated, I hate when it's complicated Why do I always end up in situations that are complicated?

Blitz knows there is something wrong, or off, between the two of them but he'd rather not talk or communicate about it - literally preferring to avoid the topic entirely because "complicated" = bad, and he has no idea how to fix that, despite the fact that most of his relationships have been and/or are still complicated, he doesn't know how to deal with that because he never learnt. He's started to with Fizz a bit at the very least, but he's definitely not in a place to do that with romantic relationships yet - but I digress.

Here I go again, getting in my head So I'll focus on the sexy stuff instead

Not too much to say about this part other than he is actively choosing to disregard his anxieties and worries about him and Stolas by putting on this mask of caring about the sex and nothing else. Honestly, not a surprise with Blitz, this is pretty average behaviour and is very much likely a common coping mechanism of his to avoid serious feelings when engaging in relationships of a romantic nature. Especially since he seems to place a lot of value in himself in how good he is in bed.

When I see him, I'm gonna do that thing he likes No need to change things, I'll just bring the ropes and spikes[/spice*] We've got a nice arrangement And it's working out just fine We'll keep it light

Can't wait to lose ourselves in nasty sex And make that bird squawk We'll just stick with what makes sense

Same as above, he's going to what's familiar and directly deciding he'd rather ignore any issues they have and not talk about them in favour of doing what they normally do on full moons and call it a night.

*my audio processing disorder really did not like that line, and I cannot completely tell if that's right - any mistakes in lyrics or other quotes from the show before or after this are almost definitely because of this so please feel free to correct me.

Moving on from the song, some things Blitz does or says during the conversation with Moxxie and Loona in the office that stick out to me.

It's the full moon, I gotta meet up with Stolas tonight. Felt like dressing up a little since it's been a few months since I've been inside his feathered ass.

This is personally really interesting to me since he's not been known to dress up explicitly to see Stolas before (excluding the posts that have been seen on the instagram accounts but I'm hesitant to count those as 100% hard canon, and they were outfits of a different variety - not a bowtie and suspenders as he's seen wearing in the episode). It's like he's trying very hard to impress him for.. some reason? I'm guessing he sees it as part of his whole plan to really sort of wow Stolas, get in there, get out, no touchy feely stuff. It comes off as the opposite to me though, it shows that he kind of values what Stolas think of him and his appearance - and that he wants to impress Stolas. This could just be him trying to prove his worth to Stolas so he doesn't get cast aside, but it could also be more.

This facial expression is very important to me. It's a split second frame of vulnerability in response to Loona saying the following:

Oh shit, he's getting bored of you.

This is genuine worry and concern on his face, he tried to cover it up with a smile but he is concerned. And yes, it could just be about losing the book, it probably is in part but I think it's more than that.

Loona also says this:

Yeah, man. If someone wants to see you less and less, big red flag. If they give you chances to ditch, they probably want out themselves. Just wanna be more passive aggressive about it, dicks.

When she says this Blitz reacts very on the defensive, repeating what she said mockingly and saying this:

How do you know, Loona?

It's a very defensive reaction and I'd bet he feels at least a little bit bruised and hurt at the thought of Stolas getting "bored" of him - which probably does not help at all with how he's struggling with how he currently feels about Stolas between the agreement for the book and not seeing him in a while.

Immediately after this interaction, he literally leaves his job (which like, yeah, he is own his boss I Guess he can do that whenever he wants but I can't imagine he does it a lot, I Hope, unless he thinks it's important) and goes shopping for more things to impress Stolas. It's a lot of effort to put into someone you don't really super care about, all things considered but let's just go with the devil's advocate here that it's not to lose the book and it doesn't really mean anything. Although I do find his choice to look at candles first interesting, assuming it's not for something else (resident sex repulsed asexual is struggling with thinking about that kind of thing - despite watching helluva boss lmao), Stolas seems to like candles. If I remember correctly, he has some near his bath.

An interesting detail for Blitz to know/remember/take into account, for someone he allegedly does not care about. Anddd that's it for Blitz's scenes in this episode.

Part 2: Stolas' Behaviour

Like with Blitz, I'm gonna focus on how Stolas acts in "When I See Him" first, then move on to what we see of him alone in the rest of the episode (which there's very little of, I think, unfortunately).

The summary of what I think of Stolas in this song is he clearly has a somewhat fairytale view of his relationship with Blitz still (which is only emphasised by how the song is disney princess like in nature), thankfully he knows he has to let him be separate from the terms of their agreement and has found a way for this to occur without horribly impacting Blitz's business. However, he (at least, at first) seems to think after this happens everything will go fine and be perfectly okay and happily ever after, or more likely hopes that is how the situation will end up - but we see more of his worries later on so he's evidently not completely deluding himself.

My derring-do is half disguised Behind a smile

I don't have a lot to say about this just that it shows Stolas is obviously aware that Blitz is performing at least a little when he's with him.

I swore I wouldn't dwell on the divorce

This line just interests me more than anything, it's understandable that he doesn't want to think about the divorce. God knows I wouldn't want to, but's it intriguing to see he's attempting to distance himself from it - I hope we see more about this in the future episodes, maybe.

So for my own health I'll remind myself That when I see him I know that it won't feel so tough I'll believe him And not the voice that says I'm not enough No need for an arrangement It can just be him and me I'll see us free How perfect it could be When I see him tonight

This bit is very sweet honestly, Stolas clearly yearns to be closer to Blitz - and he's trying his best to facilitate that. He just wants genuine connection and love, something he couldn't experience in his marriage with Stella. Stolas is obviously nervous and has some self worth issues to say the least, but he deals with them differently to Blitz. In fact, he finds that being with Blitz helps combat these (likely because he feels loved and/or wanted by someone).

Unrelated to dissecting the episode and the like, the voice acting for this part was incredible and I love the way Stolas' VA (his name has slipped my mind atm) conveys emotion in his voice - even while singing. He sounds very hopeful, yet the cracks and wobbles suggest how nervous he feels for the interaction with Blitz, even if he's currently acting as if he thinks it will end well.

Oh god I'll fucking die alone if this goes bad tonight

This bit really just kind of shows how nervous he does feel about talking with Blitz about giving him the crystal. And that he is scared it'll go wrong, it's nothing too crazy.

The detail of him having none of the medication he takes left is interesting to me though, just that he's still taking it, I guess - could suggest he's still struggling with anxiety etc etc.

Am I doing something I can't take back? Would he want me if he was free? And if he's only here as a prisoner What kind of a monster does that make me

Stolas is clearly feeling a lot of guilt for his past treatment of Blitz, and fear that his feelings aren't reciprocated - but it seems like he's more scared that he's been taking advantage of Blitz, than the thought that Blitz doesn't like him.

My entire life's been written in stone He taught me that I could choose

Blitz is the first person he really chose to meet or associate with, as a child and as an adult. There was no obligation to know him or socialise with him, or to be his friend (or more). In fact, it was discouraged if anything but Stolas chose to do it anyway - and it helped him realise he could do what he wanted, and gain the confidence to do so.

Part 3: Blitz and Stolas' confrontation

Stolas' body language here kills me, he's so nervous for what he's about to do, and despite his hopeful song early he's eerily somber - as if he knows this will end badly.

Blitz looks so afraid here, he's gone through all of this effort to try to impress Stolas and keep him from getting "bored" of him. Part of this is probably because he doesn't want to lose the connection he and Stolas have but honestly it's largely probably the fear of losing the book and his business that he's worked so hard for. Blitz is an incredibly ambitious person, and he's put a lot of blood, sweat and tears (mostly blood) into I.M.P and to have it taken away because of someone else due to not being good enough for them is probably one of his worst fears.

Blitz's immediate switch to trying to seduce Stolas is slightly jarring, but not all that surprising considering how this whole thing started. Blitz is desperate, trying anything to prove to Stolas he's worth keeping around. Meanwhile Stolas looks resigned, as if realising it really was just a performance for Blitz the entire time.

Stolas, please, I- I need this book. Please, I need this book, Stolas. I will do anything.

The immediate switch to begging, mixed with tears, took me off guard honestly. I didn't expect to see him do that but it makes sense considering how badly he treasures I.M.P and he really is just at the whim of Stolas and it could all collapse at any given moment.

I don't understand, why are you giving me this? Am I not like, fucking you good enough? Because I can- I can always do better.

This being Blitz's immediate reaction to getting the crystal from Stolas is upsetting. I was on the verge of tears here, he can't even comprehend that Stolas might genuinely want to give him a gift, not because Blitz isn't good enough, but because Stolas wants him to be independent. Blitz has never viewed himself as "good enough" for people and he puts on a lot of performances to convince himself he's worthy of being associated with others. This probably feels like, to him, a convoluted way of "getting rid" of him, instead of giving him freedom so he and Stolas can interact with less of a power imbalance.

This in an interesting roleplay, never done this one but I can get into it. How's this? Oh, Stolas, I'll stay with you, I love you soo much.

Blitz's immediate response to Stolas' confession being one of disbelief leading him into thinking it's some sort of roleplay or pretense because he can't possibly believe that anyone would actually love him is honestly worse case scenario and probably where all of this starts going downhill.

I have my answer, Blitz. You needn't say anything. I have wanted you, for so long. The fact that you couldn't believe that I might have these feelings about you, that your first instinct is that it's always about... sex. That's enough to know what this is.

This right here, is terrible. Miserable, even. Communication is starting to break down, Stolas doesn't realise or understand Blitz's point of view and I certainly cannot blame him for getting upset but how these two are communicating yet somehow falling victim to miscommunication at the same time is impressive at this point. They're both getting emotional, and it's fucking everything up but to be fair no one can remain 100% logical, this is nerve wracking and stressful for them both.

What? Fuck you, Stolas. You spring this feelings bullshit on me, are you fucking kidding? Can I get a fucking minute to think after everything you've put me through, you pompous rich asshole? Treat me like one of your little butler imps, you can't just dismiss me like that! I mean, you royal fucks think you can do this every time, like you can just play with our feelings because we're smaller and not as important! Well, I'm not letting you, bitch! Let's go!

This, this is incredibly cathartic in a weird way. It's not good by any means but for Blitz these bitter feelings have probably been somewhat simmering beneath the surface for a while and he hasn't been able to express them because of the nature of his and Stolas' relationship. The way he's phrasing this makes me wonder if he has previous experience with a royal demon doing this to him outside of now, and Stolas' father hiring him to be Stolas' friend when he was a child. It wouldn't be too unreasonable but putting that aside for a moment. The anger and lashing out here is probably a defense mechanism on his part, every time something has got vulnerable or upsetting in the past in this show Blitz always seems to get angry (an example that comes to mind at the minute is when Cash was celebrating Fizz's birthday - at the time he didn't say anything to Fizz but he stormed off, angry. Another one could be probably a few of his interactions with Verosika. I'd have to rewatch the show to find something more particular). The point is Blitz lashes out instead of being open and vulnerable, he doesn't mean or genuinely think any of this - and immediately regrets it as soon as he says it. But it's too late, it's been said.

Stolas flinches or pauses when walking a handful of times during this rant from Blitz, each time whenever he has an insult. Before he has even said anything it's immensely clear Stolas is very hurt by this.

Blitz. I think so very highly of you, I didn't realise you think so low of me.

This is the regret I was talking about, it's probably helped along by Stolas admitting he thinks highly of Blitz but god - he is crushed. And he immediately tries to apologise but Stolas teleports him out of there before he can even process it, leaving us on a terrible cliffhanger.

God, it's a fucking mess. They're a mess I'm so scared for the next episode and how they are even going to fix this. Someone get these gay demons a therapist, please, I beg.

All in all, ow my feelings, this episode hurt, I did cry. Stolitz have mastered the art of miscommunication, but that is hardly news. Blitz seems to have got a genuine wake-up call, sort of similar to how he did with Fizz and I'm hoping that kickstarts something to help him improve, because he does need to. At the same time, Stolas has kinda fucked up here, and does need to give Blitz more time to process since I imagine this is very fucking shocking to him. It's all one biggggg mess and god knows how it'll work out but I'm looking forward to finding out and hopefully not having my heart ripped out and spat on by the end of this season.

#helluva boss #helluva boss blitz #helluva boss stolitz #stolas goetia #blitzo buckzo #stolitz #helluva boss full moon #helluva boss s2 e8 spoilers #helluva boss full moon spoilers #helluva boss spoilers #original content things

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mrsoftthoughts · 3 days

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Usually When i say that i like Solangelo, i mean what they could have been, instead of what we end up getting

I really don't like TsatS (i don't hate it, i just don't like it, in fact i wouldn't mind this existing if wasn't canon)

And during Toa i have a bittersweet taste in a lot of the scenes were they appear ( especially the first because i feel Nico a bit ooc here) and feels a little rushed

But I love both Will and Nico as their individual characters, and despite the bad execution of their relationship I'm happy everytime that i remember that they are a couple, because they deserve to be happy and knowing that they can do that together it's pure joy for me

I like the couple or friends that can help each other or at least tried to do it

I love see how both are fuked up and have not the most healthy cope mechanisms in so opposite but sometimes similar ways, but can try to help each other or be side by side while they learn how to be better for themselves

I love the couple that due to not have been in immediate mortal danger while they were knowing each other can choose to show a vulnerable side whe they are ready, instead of being forced to do it, and that would take a while ofc, but the bricks of trust need to be placed carefully in order of the wall don't fall in the future, but most important they-can-choose

The boy that was outted by the god of Romantic love himself in front of someone that he didn't trust at the time, and the boy that after see the bridge were his brother was being destroyed and immediately was pulled out to accomplish his dutty as a healer ,without a chance to go and look for his brother. Now they can have the chance to chose what to do and what to show and when, without pressure.

The couple that maybe would have communication problems at the start, because both are bad asking for help and are even worse for believe that someone apart from their family ( the ones that least want to bother ) would grant it, that maybe could pass a hard time for that, but they have two options; or they drop the things there, or grow up out of this together because no couple is perfect at the start and learn things how it's required may be hard but it's worth it

The couple that may need to reassure the other that it's not for convenience or Charity that they are together but because they love each other and despite all the bad toughs that say that those words are just a gentle lie, deep in them knows thats the true

But i also love the fact that they can be one of the most "normal" couples around, just teenagers in love being teenagers in love

I love the cringing teenagers with a crush on each other that aren't in immediate danger to die like other couples in the series, just silly puberts that probably had made a storm in a glass of water trying to be perfect due to the nerves while talking to each other, that maybe sometimes were catch up looking for a little too long the other because both find the other beautiful, or that maybe like a lot of teenagers had Catch up themselves thinking things that make them feel embarrassed because hormones

The teenagers in love that maybe had nights of not sleeping in order to organize their thoughts talking with their siblings or friends about it or just because they where daydreaming about each other, that probably were on the cloud nine the first week after they started dating

The sarcastic and little a bickering teenagers that love each other deeply and often joke bettwen them

The idea of Will flirting in jokes with Nico but don't dare to go serious because he's so oblivious to not notice that Nico has been courting him the last weeks

That would have to deal with their parents comments, not because they don't like the relationship, but because they got the version of 100% approval and are embarrassed about Hades Apollo or Naomi always asking about their boyfriend

#nico di angelo #will solace #solangelo #pjo #hoo #toa #riordanverse #headcanons that should be canon #Mrs soft rambling #Mrs soft headcanons

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eggcats · 23 hours

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I'm fairly sure that in my Housewife Vox AU, Alastor knows he's asexual (and maybe aromantic) because there is NO WAY Vox isn't logged the fuck in and celebrating pride in hell (he's also the embodiment of corporate pride tbh, if he can use it to scam people out of money he WILL)

The second Vox learns what being bisexual is, he immediately did research on everything for both him and Alastor, since none of this information was available when he was alive and Alastor doesn't care enough to look it up for himself (he doesn't feel the need, he's fine with his afterlife and where he's at and his relationship)

However, they're both fucking idiots who will always be bad at communicating, so when Vox DOES learn about being ace/aro it causes a Category 5 Incident because, rather than TALKING with Alastor about any of that, he just ASSUMES that this means that (somehow) he's forced Alastor into their relationship together and that Alastor secretly hates having to kiss and have sex with him

And Vox, of fucking course, doesn't SAY any of this to Alastor, so he just stops initiating anything and any time Vox does want affection or intimacy and Alastor catches on, Vox shoves him away and avoids him

This, obviously, confuses and worries the FUCK out of Alastor because he has absolutely 0 idea what he even DID to make Vox mad at him (and doing his normal "get out of trouble" card of flirting with Vox and turning Vox on isn't working and seems to be making it worse????)

It only gets resolved when (OBVIOUSLY) Rosie forces these idiots to talk to each other, and it comes out that Vox thinks he's somehow manipulated Alastor into their relationship and forces him to do things he doesn't want to do

Vox: I mean, I tell you to kiss me, and when I want to have sex and intimacy, so clearly I'm forcing you to do it!

Alastor, eye twitching, trying not to strangle his picture box: Darling, I've told you since your first year here that I enjoy doing those things With You Specifically, and that I both need AND want you to tell me when you want so I can DO THEM since I don't have the desire to on my own

Vox, sheepish: Oh, right....

Alastor, being forced into doing breathing exercises by Rosie: Did you think you also, somehow, forced me to go into rut?

Vox, hiding his face: I GET IT OKAY

(Rosie smacks Vox for all this because, for once, it's not even Alastor's fault for not communicating, it's HIS. How they're both still so bad at this after years together, she'll never know).

After all that drama, Alastor does (eventually) learn about asexuality and aromanticism, but it took a while because Vox just read the baseline definition and Spiraled instead of talking with Alastor first. If Alastor could have banned the internet after this, he would have.

#housewife vox #theyre idiots your honor #happy pride lmao #i was just thinking bc with like how vox is there isnt any way Alastor would NOT get the ace in the hole joke tbh #bc vox the second he learns about lgbt+ identities is doing Research #(and also he's definitely the ceo that changes the logo of his company to a pride logo and using being bi to jack up his prices lol)#but vox is also stupid and doesnt register that being acearo is a spectrum and that Alastor has #SPECIFICALLY STATED he enjoys doing things with Vox FOR Vox #so vox spirals #i havent had enough drama in this AU so here it is i guess lmao

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seagullcharmer · 6 months

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gosh. drawing my botw lorule au again. i love my versions of these characters so much

#libra.txt #is it just because i gave pre-calamity ravio a ponytail? maybe #also need to draw reference images of ghirahim's sword form.......#also also need to like. actually write it. lol </3 #I HAVE IDEAS. I'M JUST BAD AT COMMUNICATING THEM.#also reference images for the divine beasts.... those'll be fun...?#like idk how in-depth i'll go for exploring the divine beasts #but it could be some interesting concepts #since like. one is a terrapin. one is a snake.#i haven't fully decided on the other two yet #i need to figure out what would fit thematically #'libra how does a terrain correlate at all'#Well You See. turtle rock or whatever. from albw + alttp #it was swampy or smth right #well instead of gerudo desert this lorule has a swamp.#look i've connected the dots (i haven't connected anything)#also the snake is subject to change #i'm trying to think of what would work for tunnels #moles would be both too obvious (it's in mogma territory) and too clumsy #but snakes.... could be fun.#think of the segmented body the divine beast could have!#need to think abt the zora in lorule..... think it might go back toward river zora designs like in albw #instead of the more sharklike ones in botw #hmmmm much to think about!!#i love rotating world building concepts around #it's just going to be hard designing major npcs #having thief girl become a major character is difficult enough #still don't actually have a name for her.

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hadesknockedupintheunderworld · 29 days

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Ngl it's weird finishing the Knuckles tv show and going to tumblr about it only for people (even who I consider bigger name fans) who also watched the entire show to claim that it "confirmed Knuckles Wachowski"

I'm sorry

Did you somehow miss the part in the last episode where Knuckles had a whole montage of hanging with the Whipple family and Wade and saying "home" or something?

#sonic the hedgehog #knuckles series #knuckles the echidna #knuckles 2024 #knuckles whipple #sonic movie #knuckles 2024 spoilers #knuckles series spoilers #fandom wank #Sorry do you just think that this entire show was a sidequest so Knuckles could go back to the Wachowski house and be their kid now like #nothing ever happened?#In the show where episode 1 clearly showed that Knuckles couldn't mesh with the household and that Sonic considered him a roommate?#This place was not home for him. The show was about him finding home. How is the Wachowski household Knuckles' home after he had an epiphany #that his home was with the whipple family??#Ah wait sorry how could I forget. Sonic fans are just used to absorbing canon with a toothpick and picking the parts they like and then #claiming their headcanons for filling in the gaps are canon #Only the things they personally like are what happened of course #Sorry for being salty I'm just annoyed. Like you can have whatever headcanons or fanon you want. Heck I loved all those 'maddie is knuckles'#mom' comics and whatnot. I'm not even saying we have to interpret the media the same way. But Knuckles having a montage and calling being #with the whipple family 'home' happened. That happened.#A friend and I are running a bet that most people won't acknowledge that it happened unless Sonic movie 3 shoves it in our faces #The universe tests me every day by having put me into Sonic fandom. It is a constant test of one's soul not only to exist in proximity of a #community who you often disagree on big points with‚ but to watch a bunch of loud people claim things are canon but only accept textual #evidence when it serves them. Or to explain a little better #to watch a fandom try to build an 'accepted idea' of what canon is like that becomes so divorced from actual canon that you get people #saying that it's canon and ignoring anything that doesn't fit it because 'writing bad anyways'#Like guys please I am grasping your shoulders. If you don't like canon just say 'fuck you I'm going to make content of this because I think #it's better'. You don't have to assert that everything you believe is canon and ignore when it's not #i just be ramblin

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friendofthecrows · 1 year

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I miss that brief golden era from like 2012 to 2016 when the online witchcraft community was actually good and full of open minded people looking to learn more and share what they know plus maybe the occasional vampire middle schooler instead of the situation now where it's been taken over by capitalist tiktok transphobes who like to come up with ways to shift to hogwarts via their inherent magical vagina powers and then sell coated quartz to cure cancer instead of seeing doctors.

#hal rambles #saying controversial things tonight i guess #btw i have done astral projection and at first when i heard about shifting i was like #'oh basically a different name for the same thing?'#then it turns out these guys are just lucid dreaming and thinking that takes them to an entire other universe #like fine enough i don't want to be mean about someone's beliefs #And then i find out about some of the dramas involved and I'm just like o_O #pls use your critical thinking skills #This is way more important when it comes to stuff like herbology though #because not checking side effects dosage etc can legitimately KILL YOU DEAD #and I've seen. So many incredibly stupid things. only to ask for a source and they send me a link to a tiktok...#This is vagueposting about certain friends #Like tiktok 'witchcraft' is completely counter to all the good I've seen in the community last decade #It's ABOUT thinking critically and learning #It's ABOUT exploring ideas that are not the most popular and not taking mainstream beliefs for absolute granted #And so much more!#Yes it can also be about belief and intuition but you have to use that responsibly #Think about why you are tempted to something #Is it actually from your subconscious or some sort of sign or did something online suggest this to you #And that's not to say all internet knowledge is bad - sometimes people do make original and useful observations on here #or compile existing resources/knowledge #But you've got to THINK about it #Same with stuff in books and from people. I'm not the 'it's published so it's automatically legit' type #Sorry for the rant #I'm up a bit too late and i was thinking about it #Time to go dream about killing someone for the Aesthetic and Drama (my favorite lucid dream series)#(and you see - I'm not going into another universe and murdering people via lucid dreaming about it)

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thefirstknife · 10 months

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Big fan of what I read in the thingy about plans for the exotic mission rotator, most of it sounds very solid to me

However

Since the focus seems to be on making the relevant exotic weapon craftable, do you think this makes it less likely we'll get whisper of the worm or zero hour back? Outbreak seems like it wouldnt be broken as a crafted but I cant imagine Whisper as crafted, that feels like a dangerous can of worms.

And also, as it seems unlikely Ada or Black Armory will have a story spotlight again, how would you feel about Niobe Labs getting reworked into an exotic mission, dropping craftable izanagi or le monarque, craftable black armory weapons, and then maybe some of those nifty modified foundry weapons but of the post-witch queen ones.

I thought about that too, specifically the potential to get Zero Hour and Whisper back with craftable Outbreak and Whisper. I really like the idea of craftable exotics with these missions and this idea would be the only real reason to bring back Zero Hour and Whisper. But how viable are they to be craftable is beyond me. I think in some way it might help, especially for Whisper, but on the other, it could make them too powerful, in this case for Outbreak. Balancing that would be incredibly difficult.

I'd like to see those missions returning however! Even if they don't want to make these weapons craftable. I just feel like they won't really bother going through that work if nothing of value can be added. A lot of people say that they want them back, but in reality they would not have much replayability without something to chase. They also might be too frustrating at this point; the Wicked Implement exotic mission being timed was a major point of frustration for a lot of people. But I would 100% enjoy seeing them back, with or without craftable exotics. In a way, it almost makes it more likely because at first it just made no sense to return those missions when the exotics are in the kiosk, but if they're going to be changed in some way, then it makes more sense. It's just on whether or not those two are viable for such a change.

Same thoughts on Ada and Black Armory. I think they did say at one point that they're looking into returning some old weapons, specifically Black Armory and Season of Dawn stuff, but so far we've not heard anything more about it. Your idea would be really cool. Reworking Niobe's Labs into a mission and adding a craftable Black Armory exotic would be really neat. No clue how likely that is to happen though; as of now, I'm thinking not very. But now that we know this stuff with exotic missions is possible, it's a neat possibility.

#destiny 2 #exotic mission #ask #at this point it just hinges on how much work these would require and how interested the community would be #i know people cry about zero hour and whisper a lot but outside of the novelty of replaying them one more time i don't think...#... many of the veterans who cry about it the most would be playing it a lot #and i'm not sure how the new players would receive them. it seems timed missions aren't as exciting these days #zero hour and whisper are really cool though. i would love if people got a chance to play them #the timer isn't as bad as you might first think. it's a really cool excercise of practice #but yeah. would it be worth doing all the work? without an offer for an item i don't think so #they would have to put some new rewards and options in there if they planned to put it back in #craftable outbreak..... god. i can't even imagine what they would add to it to make it better. that gun is 10/10 already #might help whisper though! but then again. how would they do that without making it too much or still irrelevant #interesting idea either way!

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