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doodledstars · 1 month

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Been incredibly busy working on multiple projects this month, but I finally had time to go out and do personal art at UW with the cherry blossoms blooming! ^^

Hopefully this month I can squeeze in personal work and comic updates!

#ds art #art #cherry blossoms #doodles #plein air #doing personal art feels great after a month's worth of work! ^^#also drew a new ship hohoho

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forestofsprites · 10 months

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enjoyed nature while high and not to overexaggerate but jesus fucking christ have u ever watched the sunset. felt the warmth of sunlight on your face. saw it echo through the blades of grass.

#NORMAL & HEALED !#I honestly don't know how the two haven't combined before but the sun tonight???? ooooooooh hohoho #gummy and sunlight folks. gummy and sunlight #sunlight also by itself is great it's brilliant #thoughts

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nattere · 6 months

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Ya Ho Ho! You found me!

Peppermint koroks are available on my Etsy 👀✨

Link if you're interested👇

Etsy: Nattere

#hehehe #hohoho #koroks #more koroks #peppermint #clay art #clay artist #polymer clay #my art #charms #totk #botw #they may or maynot smell like peppermint too #idk if i can get the peppermint oil to stay on them thatd be great #but i try #artist

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skyeslittlecorner · 2 months

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Okay, I know it's impossible, but can you do some headcanons about the kings are sick? (like maybe because of angels or sth I dunno :'>)

Then we gotta take care of them (hohoho I fine with fluff or a little bit of smoky situation (^///^))

P/s: Sorry for any grammar mistakes TvT Btw I really enjoy your works (love it :3), so have a great day and take your time (o゜▽゜)o❤️

Thanks dear anon, and hope you have a great day too! 🧡 Them being sick is not so impossible, they are definitely lovesick lmao

We can give them some common cold, why not! That's why we have fanfics. To experiment and have fun. Even so, there are plenty of options for when they might feel unwell. Angel blood, poison, war wounds. But we'll go on the lighter side of regular flu. Sick kings times one, let's do it~

꧁:･ ✡ ･:꧂

Satan will never acknowledge he's feeling bad. Do you want to put him to bed? Make him. Actually, making him won't be so hard because he staggers on his feet. Since you put him in bed, you are supposed to take care of him personally. His flu is a game of cat and mouse, he will feel a little better and he will come out of his room, and then he will feel bad again and you will drag him back into the bed. Preferably by the hair, and furious. He would have cooperated a little more if it weren't for the war. At this rate, you'll be curing his common cold for a month.

Mammon is team "spoil me or I will never get better". He even likes being sick, just cut out the 'feeling bad' part. He loves your concern, has all your attention, and you accumulate drugs so much that he hasn't seen such greed for a long time. It's good that you can't catch demon flu, you'll be like his mascot that he cuddles in bed all the time.

Beelzebub? Sick? Be ready for drama. He is NOT staying in bed. Don't even mention needles, he'll be gone before you finish your sentence. If you want him to stay and heal, you have to entertain him. This bastard isn't even afraid of death, what other can you expect? He's feverish, delusional and bored. It is advisable to buy toys. Looot of sex toys. And definitely try it with him.

Leviathan is impossible to decipher. When he feels worse, he will look even better. There is a joke in my university, "what you can't do, you make up for in looks", and he is embodiment of this. Once you understand that he is sick, don't tell his nobles. He's tired, all he wants is being surrounded with them buzzing like bees in a hive. Just lie down with him. Only with him. He certainly took some medicine on his own, so just be there to keep him company.

#whb #what in hell is bad #whb satan #whb beelzebub #whb leviathan #whb mammon #skye's little talk

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roachesbf · 11 months

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You already know who it isssssss!!!

If you’re up for it, considering you’ve already done a bear courting fic with König if I’m correct.. anywho, if you’re up to it! Bear!Price.

He’s just so big and hairy, and likely musky with an earthy scent. Probably constantly scenting your room or clothes, sometimes even your person as a whole. Big hands keeping you as close as possible.

He’s so possessive at times, keeping you in big bear hugs as he huffs and growls towards anyone too close for liking. He just wants you to himself, can’t risk having someone else’s scent on you.

The man is a heavy sleeper, and refuses to let you go once you’re in bed with him. Keeping you borderline hostage as he purrs and hums pleasantly.

And he’s big on providing. Living up to his little fishermen’s hat as he constantly goes out and brings you back the nicest fish he could find. He wants to show you that he can provide! The perfect mate, no?

He’s just so big on making sure you’re safe and loved. He wants you to know it too. Doting on you constantly and spoiling you with his love.

Anywhooo, per usual, keep up the amazing work!!<333

- 🪶

Bear Price Headcanons

Hohoho you’re totally right about Price’s scenting obsession, he loves having you wear his clothing. Hats, jackets, shirts you name it, at this point his clothes are your clothes. He’s got such an aggressive scent to others though, it’s almost impossible to not smell him on you since he’s with you any chance he gets. Holding you close or nuzzling his beard into your neck, tickling you in the process. It quite literally makes everyone sick and they complain to him about constantly scenting you but he just looks away and says he has no idea what they’re talking about.

This mf is so funny though because in his sleep he’ll accidentally roll onto you, a few smacks on his back he wakes up and with a grumbly tone says “Sorry about that love :3” But he’s not sorry at all because he thinks it’s pretty funny and you’re lucky if he doesn’t do it again later that night. If he's not on top of you he’s got you in a strong hold on your waist, keeping you close that he’s practically suffocating you but shittt nobody here is gonna complain.

I feel like he’s very embarrassed about being jealous and possessive, because what does he have to worry about at his grown age. If he was doing something and he saw someone interacting with you in a way he didn’t like, he'd immediately pause whatever he was doing, it’s a simple way of body language to show that he’s distressed. Afterwards he’ll go and wrap an arm around your waist and give you a kiss on the lips before asking what you were talking about.

If you tease him about it he’ll just gruff and say “So what..” Of course make, him feel better by giving him a kiss on the cheek. It's very sweet and domestic, always managing to calm him down.

Tbh Price to me is that one image where it’s like my bitch wife tells me what to do, if he sees you being too rowdy, he’s picking you up over your shoulder. Or he’ll place his bucket hat on you, which surprises you so much you don’t even remember what got you acting out in the first place. He also does that to be smug, he knows everybody hates it and thinks it's ugly…but they also simultaneously want it, it's a need. So when you walk in with the hat, they’re just so jealous because how do you have it???

In my heart I know he is a great cook, and it’s one of the biggest things he does to show off to you. Not only is he strong, smart, but he’s an incredible cook. He’d bend over backwards to impress you with his cooking, he also knows cooking is a thing a lot of guys lack in so it’s just another thing he has over others that proves he’s better.

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osachiyo · 10 months

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Can i request Fyodor x shy fem reader but in her mind is full of sexual desires and thought that Fyodor didn't notice about it? , feel free to ignore I really love your writing Btw English isn't my first language if i misspelled or you not understand what i say , I'm sorry 😭💖

-ˋˏ ༻❁༺ ˎˊ- FAUX INNOCENCE ? -ˋˏ ༻❁༺ ˎˊ-

➺note! omg hi anon! Trust me, your english isn't too bad! I could understand everything perfectly, no need to apologise.I was so happy to see this request because this Russian rat man has me on a tight leash 😭 also I love this idea a lot, thanks for requesting!! ♡♡♡ MINORS DNI OR NIKOLAI WILL DRAG YOU INTO A ROOM FILLED WITH MANEATING MUTATED RATS AND BURN THE KEY.

Okay so first of all, you cannot hide anything from this man 😭 like it's almost impossible. Fyodor is great at reading people and he knows you're hiding something from him pretty early on in the relationship.

He honestly loved your shy personality. He found you absolutely adorable and just so so easy to manipulate.

He was a little shocked to find out some of the stuff you were into because you just seemed so shy and innocent?

But you, oh sweet you, being completely oblivious to the fact that he's catching on.

Trust me, he will slowly but surely notice your dirty mind. It isn't what he expected but it's alright, it amuses him a bit actually.

He'll catch you staring at his fingers as he's typing or writing something and biting your bottom lip. He'll say with a teasing grin, "just what are you thinking about, my little mouse?" Catching you off guard as you scramble to find an excuse.

But after dating for a while, as you slowly got more comfortable around him, he'd want you to tell him exactly what you wanted from him. You want his fingers? Ask for it. You want his mouth? Plead for it. You want his cock? Beg for it.

It slowly moves on to more frisky stuff as well...

You want him to wrap his hand around your throat? Ask nicely. You want him to tie you up and take you in front of Nikolai? Get down on your knees and beg him. Even though he has no intention of sharing you of course, he just wants to see you beg. He also revels in the sight of your disappointed and bashful look as he denies your idea of bringing Nikolai into your bedroom activities, even if it's just watching.

He will praise and reward you for being good, of course. A good pet deserves a good treat.

But if you disobey him and act like a brat? Hohoho... get ready for a long night.

He'd tie you up with a little vibrator or his fingers playing with your pussy as he makes you say all of your kinks to him.

He'd try them all out one by one, absolutely destroying your pathetic little pussy as you sob and wail :(

And if one of your kinks is orgasm denial.....good luck.

You have been tied to the bedpost for god knows how long, with intricate silk ribbons holding you in place, a tiny purple vibrator attached to your clit by your lover. You knew pissing Fyodor off wasn't a good idea but it wasn't your fault Nikolai basically forced you to! Now you were in this embarrassing position in front of the Russian man. Legs spread and tied back with the ribbons as he toyed with your sopping cunt with that god forsaken vibrator. But there was a catch. You couldn't cum. Every time you were close to your sweet, sweet orgasm the vibrator was abruptly turned off, making you cry out with fat tears running down your puffed out cheeks. Fyodor simply tutted, sneering at you with a wicked smirk as he turned the vibrator back on, overstimulating your swollen clit.

"Fuck, Fedya please! 'wanna cum so so so so bad, p-please!" You wailed out, trying to thrash around but the ribbons were holding you firmly on place. Drool was spilling out from the corners of your mouth as you wailed to your cruel lover, who merely tilted his head. "Dear, didn't you say you were into this? You told me you liked orgasm denial, did you not?" You wanted to strangle him but also wanted to get pounded by him at the same time. You groaned, tears still falling from your swollen eyes, "That's enough, please! N-no more.." You sniffled. Fyodor just smiled, turning the vibrator at it's full setting and watching you throw your head back with a squeal as your pussy gushed, spraying clear liquid all over the silk sheets, soaking them. You thanked him over and over again while chanting his name like a prayer, finally relieved to receive your orgasm. He let you ride out your orgasm before turning the vibrator off. He knelt close to you again, staring with mischievous eyes. "Now now, myshka, what else did you tell me you were into? I'd like to try it out. Tonight."

©ambrosiaa— do not copy, plagiarize and repost my works to any platform, reblogs are very appreciated♡

#bsd smut #bsd x reader #bungo stray dogs #bungo stray dogs smut #Fyodor smut #Fyodor x reader #bsd imagines #bsd fanfic #bungou stray dogs x reader smut #Bungou stray dogs x reader

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creedslove · 4 months

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No outbreak!Joel Miller x f!reader

A/N: Merry Christmas, besties ❣️

• when you showed up with the Santa costume and a mischievous smile, the first thing Joel said was "no" as he would definitely not dress up as Santa Claus at Christmas

• he just thought it would be so stupid and silly to do that, he was sure everyone would just laugh and make fun of the fact a grown man like Joel Miller would dress as Santa and throw his "hohohos" around and he was not getting himself into that

• but you pouted and gave him the puppy eyes and reminded him how happy the kids would be, the entire family would love to see it, and just to think of his sweet little Sarah happy at the visit of Santa, he felt his heart warm and even if he was still reluctant, he said yes

• as if you needed another reason to be excited about Christmas, now your handsome boyfriend was going to dress up as Santa and make all the kids happy, you couldn't wait and you couldn't even stop talking about it, to the point Joel told you he wasn't going to do it anymore if you didn't shut up

• so when Christmas came, you were so excited about seeing Joel in that costume you couldn't even get to sleep the night before, you were just so happy the moment you saw him leaving the room in his full red santa claus attire you squealed and jumped on him, hugging him so tight and surprising him at your enthusiasm, he wrapped his arms around you and pulled you for a small kiss, and you laughed at the fact you'd just kissed Santa

• he had to get back to his role and walked downstairs, a little shy at first but dragging the attention of everyone else to him, and of course that everyone else loved it, cheering and snapping pictures of him, at the same time he kids rushed to him, hugging him tight and celebrating the fact Santa had showed up to visit them

• but when Joel went outside with his Santa attire, the other kids from the street also saw him and got all excited and immediately ran to him, which made Joel have to sit down and talk to all of the kids, let them blabber about Christmas and take pictures with him

• as you watched this entire interaction, you couldn't help but feel your heart clench in so much love it was overwhelming, Joel was such a great guy with kids, he was an amazing dad and even if you already witnessed that on a daily basis with his relationship with Sarah, you felt different, you began longing for him, because if it was up to you, you'd let him put a baby in you that night

• Joel was enjoying it more than he'd like to admit it, it was actually fun to be the spotlight of the party and make the kids so happy, the way they just went crazy and he could see the happiness in their little eyes, it was very rewarding

• not to mention he really enjoyed that kiss you'd previously given him, so when his santa claus duty was finally over, the Christmas party was already dying down, everyone saying their goodbyes and eventually you and Joel were left alone at home and he grabbed you by the waist kissing you deeply and making you giggle

"now I gotta find out if you have been a good or a naughty girl"

• he whispers into your ear and it makes you slap his chest playfully

"change these clothes because I'm going to clean up a bit downstairs, don't be silly, Joel"

• he chuckled but let you go, knowing he had a better plan, so you went downstairs trusting Joel had stripped down from his costume, but the moment you began washing the dishes you heard Joel coming downstairs, assuming he was there to help you

• but when he stood at the door wearing nothing but his Santa hat, his white beard and red boxers; you were shocked to say the least

"have you been naughty or nice, baby girl?"

• he asked with a playful smile, making you drop all the dishes you were washing and walked to him, not believing your eyes, Joel was so playful and the moment he pulled you closer, you simply couldn't resist him, kissing him deeply, even with the beard

• he cornered you against the kitchen counter and lifted you up, wanting to take you right there, it was going to be a long night and he was definitely making you sit on Santa's lap

____

#pedro pascal #pedro pascal x reader #pedro pascal x you #pedro pascal x y/n #pedro pascal fanfiction #pedro pascal fanfic #pedro pascal headcanon #pedro pascal headcanons #joel miller #joel miller x reader #joel miller x you #joel miller x y/n #joel miller fanfiction #joel miller fanfic #joel miller headcanon #joel miller headcanons

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maopll · 1 year

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Hello!

Can I request Ayato, Zhongli, Al-Haitham and Kaveh getting a hand-crafted sculpture (a small one not a humongous one) from their sculptor girlfriend?

AS I CAPTURED YOU IN MY ART

| genshin impact !

⌗:, a/n: HSHSHSH anon if I was physically there with these feast for the eyes men I would hold them down and paint a thousand portraits. this is basically me in a nutshell if I was ever there.

⌗:, warning: none

⌗:, pairings: ayato, zhongli, alhaitham and kaveh w/ fem!reader (separately)

,,sculpting has always been your favourite task, and being a sculptor yourself, you have great taste in selecting only the things that are alluring and charming. so when you have a man who is so beautiful and also your lover...hohoho these hands won't be keeping to themselves.

AYATO KAMISATO ✧ ˚ 　· 　　 .✧ ˚ 　· 　　 .

the mole beneath his soft lips, the periwinkle droopy soft eyes, and the fluffy cloud-like hair. how can he look so dignified and charming at the same time? even though you like his composoed demeanor but when you two are alone and he has his hair in a loose ponytail with hair slicked back, you drool and have heart eyes.

you are a sculptor and what better way to carve him out of precious jades for you to preserve his beauty? so you did just that. you found yourself some noctilucous jade when you were in liyue. they were not in bulk amounts but atlesst you would be able to capture his face.

ayato had a separate place arranged for you in the kamisato estate because you were their most frequent visitor and you would even stay a few nights or so in there. while he would retire to his bed for the night he would knock on your door to see if you would sleep now but he would only be met with a "I'll sleep later !" from you follower by a few clashing and clinking sounds. he was worried you were up to no good but he decided to believe you.

so just imagine his sheer surprise when he had a perfectly carved portrait of his from noctilucous jade. it was truly a precious gift but he wondered who gave it to him but after tracing his memories back he knew you made it.

he had this lovesick smile on his face and a slight blush dusting his cheeks as he patiently waited for your return so that he can reciprocate his love to you for making such a priceless piece for him and him only. you bought the noctilucous jade with his money, but it's fine

ZHONGLI ✧ ˚ 　· 　　 .✧ ˚ 　· 　　 .

he is the god of stone and contracts so could there possibly be someone who can carve better sculptors other than the god himself ? yes and that's why you are here

he looks like a masterpiece and you are not going to have regrets later in the future thinking that you could not sculpt him so you brought some random stone you found in Mt.Hulao and started carving.

he hasn't been seeing you around lately, and truly, he got nervous that something happened to you, so he put xiao up to the task to see what you were up to and you are no fool you knew he would send someone so you told him beforehand to not let Zhongli know about it.

The dates when his birthday was and the day when you completed your zhongli sculptor coincided and honestly you were ecstatic to show him what you made..but the thought that he is THE GOD and you're a mere plebeian who made this but you should atlesst show him right? so there you go keeping it on his work desk inside your house.

he came inside the room and saw you standing there with this bright smile on your face and he was even more happy than you because he is finally able to see after so long!

"happy birthday 'li I made this cake and...uhh this maybe a little wonky but I hope you like my sculptor of yours."

he has many sculptures of himself scattered across teyvat, but yours hold special meaning to him. while those who carved him were out of devotion, yours were out of unadulterated love. no matter how much time passes by... throughout centuries and millennials, he will keep your gift close to his heart

ALHAITHAM ✧ ˚ 　· 　　 .✧ ˚ 　· 　　 .

Acting Grand Sage here held an indifferent point of view towards performing arts but when he started dating you he saw how much you loved sculpting and painting more than anything although you never read in the academiya.

he always thought that you might find his taste in art very "bland" like how kaveh said so imagine his surprise when he found you making a carving of him with the same aesthetic that he likes.

your boyfriend had been out and about taking care of the academiya works and cleaning the mess those sages made so he's been busy lately but you have nothing to do so you thought "haithie just moved into a new office so I should make him something as a decoration and as a gift! :D"

many in the grand bazaar praised you for your masterpieces so you were quite confident in what you were making. so you brought some clay from the market and proceeded with it.

when he would return home he would find you covered in clay and...'is that an unfinished sculpture?? for who is it?' but he never got his answer from you. so he didn't pry further.

On entering his office one day he found a sculpture of his set aside near the lamp. he approached it and just stared in awe at your craft. it's was perfect. truth be told even he never knew that you could make him look so perfect.

the sculpture that you sent was always kept near the lamp, it was never moved from its position. he truly admired your works and to think that he would get a carving of himself would always get a smile on his face as he would quietly thank you for being there with him...but how did you get the access to the office??? he guessed that it would be a story for another day

KAVEH ✧ ˚ 　· 　　 .✧ ˚ 　· 　　 .

He himself is a renowned architect. he can make paintings, he can play instruments and he can make masterpieces. so the both of you falling in love was by fate. and he has never stopped reminding his girlfriend again and again how prefect your pieces are and how intricate your details were.

although kaveh has been suffering from paying off debts you had always helped him by providing him with funds from your works when you would sell them. he has been so indebted you and he is thankful to the archon for giving him the best significant other.

kaveh was departing for the desert now to gather architecture details and designs for his client so he wouldn't be back for atlesst 2 to 3 weeks or so. both you and him would be alone so you thought about giving him a parting gift before he resumes his journey and also let him keep it as a luck charm.

so what should you gift him with the skill you have? a sculpture! so you made brought some gypsum from the market to make it waterproof and hard so that he doesn't break it when he's on his research.

it took you some time to make it perfect because he is perfect and you ofcourse cannot forget his signature feather accessory in his hair.

and then came the day of you presenting it to him. he just stared at the sculpture for a few minutes and stood there observing it carefully. then the next moment he came crashing on you spewing 'I love you, I love you so much' and he meant it really. this had to be the best present he ever received from someone

he feels blessed when he looks at your token of affection because he found a girlfriend, a lover made for eachother. once he gathers enough to make ends meet he will surely take you out to show just how much he loves you <3

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polysyndetonaddictsupportgroup · 22 days

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forever ago you mentioned in an ask post that you have a story in your head about college-aged Matt saving Frank’s kids and in return the Castle family forcibly enfolds him into their tribe. There is literal kidnapping involved, and every word in your little summary was fucking hilarious. I want you to know that that scenario has lived in my head rent free ever since—I am astounded by your brain and that concept makes me want to eat dirt (in the best way)(that is a compliment of the highest degree)

anyways! Please don’t think this is me asking “when will you write that” bc i get it, some plot bunnies are just bunnies, and time/real world is a bitch, BUT—if you ever have any little ramblings about it, I’d love to hear them :) the Castle family is Insane and I love them dearly and I am forever entranced by your characterizations of Matt and Frank

Have a good one!!

Christmas with the Castles my beloved. I love this one so much that I typed out an outline of the fic entirely. It is long. Please, take my ramblings if you want them:

It's Christmas at Columbia, hohoho, peace and goodwill to all mankind. The dorms are closed over winter break to replace the pipes and Matt's out on his ass for the holidays, so get fucked, blind little orphan with no surviving family, and God bless us everyone.

Normally the Nelson clan would have taken him in but Foggy's bitch of a Great Aunt Bertha insists on holding the entire family hostage for the holidays with the will as collateral, and she sucks in many respects but even more in the sense that she doesn't want any blind orphans schlepping around her holiday table. But the Nelson clan will risk it all for Matt, who they think is neat. They'll put the whole fucking will on the line, buddy.

Matt assures them that he's got it all under control and has a place to stay. Yes, with a person. Yes, a real one. An old friend of his dad's. No, he's not going to be homeless. Stop asking questions.

This is a lie.

His plan is to simply be homeless. Peace and goodwill to all mankind.

Except Foggy knows when Matt's on his bullshit and insists on speaking to the guy he's staying with, which means he needs to get Fogwell to lie for him. Except Fogwell knows when Matt's on his bullshit and won't let him off the fucking hook until he knows Matt won't be homeless for the holidays.

Matt unequivocally refuses to come home with him. Stop asking. He'll find someone else to do the phone call.

They compromise with Matt staying in the fucking boiler room of the gym. Peace and goodwill to all mankind.

Except Matt sort of makes Fogwell think that he only needs to crash for a few days, and Foggy's family is going to take him in for the rest. This is also a lie. He is fucking off to be homeless for the rest of the holiday season.

Peace and goodwill to all mankind.

He's swallowing his misgivings and putting up with staying in the boiler room of the gym for a few days so Fogwell won't freak out. Which he now regrets. Because it puts him right in the earshot of an active hostage situation. Are those kids? Those are fucking kids.

Anyway he tries to call the police anonymously like ten times but this just tips off the hostage takers, who apparently have a mole in the police, surprising no one. Now they're going to kill the fucking kids.

Matt can't listen to this.

Peace and fucking goodwill to all mankind.

Okay. Fuck. He's doing this now.

Fuck.

THE CASTLE'S HOLIDAY SEASON, THUS FAR:

The kids got kidnapped.

fuck.

that happened.

The thing is that some random NSA guy got into contact with Frank and in this AU he actually blew the whistle on the the CIA's bullshit. His family was in protective custody, until his best friend and pseudo brother stabbed him in the fucking back and sold them out. Now they have his kids.

He then kills a lot of people.

Like a lot.

But he can't find his kids. They have his kids.

They're going to kill his kids.

MATT'S NIGHT, THUS FAR:

He's an asshole in sweatpants with a t-shirt wrapped around the top part of his face and no fucking plan, and there are so many assholes with guns in there. Like. So many.

But fuck it. He's doing this now.

fuck.

He fights a lot of guys. He gets super shot. Some guy tries to shoot him with arrows. Like, what the fuck even is this, Robin Hood? Honestly, fuck this night.

Anyway, he saves the kids. Wheee.

It's sort of nice? They bond, when the crying stops. The kids like him a lot. He calls their parents. Sets up a place for them to get picked up. The boy gives him the sweatshirt he's wearing under his jacket, which is kind of him, because it's fuck-off cold and Matt's about ten minutes from going into shock. Anyway, he drops them off at the spot and fucks off into the night before their oddly bloodstained dad can stop him like the world's shittiest off-brand batman.

He then goes to exercise the right of any God-fearing American citizen, which is to bleed out in the basement of his childhood church.

Fogwell's never gonna be okay again if he finds Matt's blood-soaked body in the gym. Matt figures he can just break into that basement no one uses, steal a med kit, make a solid confession about breaking into and stealing from a church if he lives long enough, and hopefully no one will even notice he was there.

This does not pan out.

A really angry nun finds him and narcs him out to Father Lanthom and they bitch him out for "dying" and "not seeking life-saving medical attention" and drag his ass to to the hospital.

NOW THE CASTLE FAMILY, REUNITED AT LAST:

The kids' will be in therapy forever but the danger is gone, because frank killed them all very dead.

He then received a presidential pardon for All The Murder.

Peace and goodwill to all mankind.

Anyway he's testified about the CIA corruption, the government is occupying itself with the coverup to end all coverups, and his only remaining concerns is (1) taking care of his family and (2) making sure the bleeding dipshit who saved his kids lives doesn't die in the streets. He's gotta find that dumb asshole.

Then he gets a phone call from a very concerned nurse at Metro General about the bleeding dipshit that got brought in with his kid's sweatshirt. They're calling because he keeps trying to goddamn leave while very fucking shot and he had a jacket with Frankie's information written on it in magic marker. Do they know him? Can they please come pick him up? They think he's going to die in the streets if someone does not pick him up.

And Yeah. Yeah, Frank Can Do That.

Matt.

Yeah.

The magic marker, he didn't.

Didn't

Didn't see that part.

Fuck.

Anyway, Matt's On His Way Out To Be Homeless For The Holiday Season, Peace And Goodwill To All Mankind, As Soon As The Goddamn Nurses Stop Hiding The Leave Against Medical Advice Forms. He lied and said he got jumped by a lot of guys, no, he didn't see who did it, because, you know. Blind. Just a regular ol' blind guy here. Poor fucking blind orphan alone and shot for the holiday season. Just give him the goddamn form.

And then that fucking guy shows up in his hospital room. The suspiciously bloody father of the kids he just got shot over. He's here, he's insisting that Matt's one of his family's closest friends and they're paying all of Matt's medical bills, and he's not commenting on the blind bit, but Matt can literally smell his curiosity. Matt's insisting that some random guy gave him the jacket, no, he didn't see his face, because, you know. Blind. He's not the guy Frank thinks he is. Nope. Please fuck off now.

They do not fuck off. Maria Castle blows through the hospital room like a hurricane, hugs him very genuinely, cries a little, and tells him that the Castle family pays their debts, and they've never had a greater one. Then the kids show up, and they fucking recognize him. Fuck.

Matt: imindanger.exe

Matt keeps feigning ignorance. Then, he waits until they leave the room and he fucking books it.

Anyway the Castle family minivan catches up to him when he's legging it a block away. They keep pace with him, and ask to just take him where he's going, and they swear they're not going to hurt him. They just want to help him out. He saved their kids.

And he can hear that they're telling the truth.

And it's so goddamn cold.

And he can hear his own internal bleeding.

And he's so, so tired.

So he tells them that no one would ever believe them. And he gets in the car. and he gives them Fogwell's address. And he tells himself he'll crash there for a day or two and fuck off to be homeless in the streets, peace and good-fucking-will to all mankind.

WHAT THE CASTLE FAMILY DID NOT SCHEDULE FOR THE DAY:

A kidnapping.

WHAT THE CASTLE FAMILY DOES:

It's. It's a kidnapping. They do a kidnapping.

Look. Look. they pay their debts. They pay their fucking debts. It's what they do. And they get to Fogwell's boiler room and rapidly fucking realize that the guy who they owe their everything to is a terminally stupid 20-something and living in the rundown boiler room of an empty gym. And they simply cannot have that.

Frank? Frank, show Matthew back to the car, will he? Maria's going to pack up his things for him.

Matt: what.exe

WHAT MATT DID NOT SCHEDULE FOR THE DAY:

it's.

It's the kidnapping.

it's that.

This fic is fundamentally founded in my premise that the entire Castle family is simply fucking insane. They're just all like that. Frank is not an outlier.

For the Castles, they're being perfectly reasonable. It's obvious that no one's taking care of this lovely young man who saved their kids, so no one will mind if they do it instead. He definitely needs it. So they sit their kids down and explain that sometimes Stockholm Syndrome is for someone's own good, which sounds perfectly reasonable to them. They then proceed to treat this like when you somewhat impulsively get a sick puppy from a Home Depot parking lot, and, well, he's a bit poorly behaved, and he keeps trying to run away, but the kids had wanted it so badly and eventually he's going to settle into his new home and then maybe you can stick felt reindeer antlers on him for the Christmas card, so you keep shoving his meds in peanut butter and forcing them down his throat and keeping the door blocked so the puppy can't slip out into the freezing new york night.

Matt treats this for what it is, which is a fucking kidnapping.

He is now fucking handcuffed to these crazy assholes' guest bed in their suburban home. It's by definition a kidnapping. they're acting like he's the unreasonable one for pointing this out. Except every time he wriggles out of his handcuffs, Frank just lugs his ass back to bed and chains him back up while they scold him. As if he's the unreasonable one for trying to escape his own kidnapping. They make him take his meds and eat three meals a day and the kids watch fucking Christmas movies with him while narrating the screen, as if this wasn't a kidnapping. This is insane. They're all insane.

Which is what he eventually tells them, out loud and to their faces.

And then Maria cries.

Stop.

Stop that.

That thing she's doing with her face. Stop that thing.

And Maria's like. Maybe they were over enthusiastic. But, being a mother, she just wants to take care of the nice young man who saved her little angels. And if that makes her a criminal, then she guesses she's a criminal. Because she cares.

Matt: shoving me into a van and handcuffing me to a bed against my will makes you by definition a criminal

maria: *cries harder*

Matt: stop

And Matt's like. Fine. Fine. He'll give into their crazy fucking kidnapping. Saves him the trouble of being homeless. Just. It's only until Christmas, and then he's gone.

maria, tearfully: and new years too?

Matt: don't push your luck

So fuck it. He's doing this now. But he's not going to like it. And he gets to come and go when he wants.

Frank: no.

matt: seriously fuck you

Except Matt's got shit they didn't pack at Fogwells. Shit they didn't realize belonged to him. His dad's shit. And he's absolutely desperate to get his dad's shit before some well-meaning janitor tosses it. So he very reluctantly agrees to let Frank go in his stead. Just. Just don't talk to people. And don't tell anyone he kidnapped matt. matt does not want to deal with that fucking court case.

Fogwell, immediately catching Frank gathering Matt's stuff for him, when he finds out that Matt sent him: are you a Nelson?

Frank, not a Nelson: Guilty.

And Fogs is just. Thrilled. So fucking thrilled that Matt has the Nelsons. Matt needs people like that, you know? People that'll welcome him home.

He's a good kid. And he hasn't had a home in a good long time. And Fogs--he's so fucking sorry that he couldn't give Matt that. And he. He.

Just tell him Merry Christmas from him? He understands why Matt didn't want to spend it with him.

Just tell him ol' Fogs was thinking of him. Tell him he really, really cares and hopes his holidays are good.

Fuck. Tell him he loves him. Just. Just tell him that. Fogs should have done it a long time ago.

What follows from there is a lot of wholesome, family-friendly Christmas activities, like:

making gingerbread houses

ice-skating

having a total mental breakdown when you get the message passed along from your pseudo-grandfather that he wishes he could have given him a home.

drinking cocoa

getting shit-faced drunk out on the town with the somewhat insane mother of those kids you saved, only to both be lugged home by a very exasperated Frank Castle.

watching Christmas movies

Visiting the grave of your dead father whose loss you've never recovered from

drinking eggnog

Confessing about your superpowers to the crazy fuckers who may or may not have given you stockholm syndrome, as well as your lasting trauma around the fact that you were child-soldierified and your soul-crushing terror that it will happen again

Making paper snowflakes

(Matt may not have meant to do all those things.)

I really like having backstories in communication with each other across my fics taking place in the same fandom? And Fogs is a great example of that. He tends to show up in all of my Daredevil fics, and he usually does something that brings Matt in from the cold in his backstory.

But in this world, that Fogs didn't do it.

In this one, he had the chance, and he failed.

Matt came to him. He ran away from the foster care system when he was a teen, and he went to Fogs as a desperate, last ditch effort. He begged Fogs to still love him the way he did when he was a kid. He begged Fogs to take him in the way he once took in Jack Murdock. He'd help Fogs around the gym. He'd do anything Fogs asked. He just wants to go home.

All he's wanted for years was to just go home.

And Fogs hugged him. He held him. He let him sleep on the couch.

And he called the police.

He wanted to do it the right away around, this time. He didn't want Matt to be hiding from the system for the rest of his youth the way his daddy once did. He wanted him to still get to go to school. He wanted him to be a kid. He wanted to adopt him proper, and didn't think of the fact that no one was gonna let him do it.

And he didn't account for how Matt would never trust him again.

He didn't account for Matt ending up on the streets, and he didn't account for matt refusing to come for him for help again, and he didn't account for Matt refusing to have anything to do with him until he hit law school and barely tolerated hanging around the gym at night again, and he didn't account for Matt not being able to stand the idea of spending the holidays with him.

There's a lot Fogs won't ever forgive himself for.

Anyway, Matt's stockholm syndrome was a great success. They fucking did it. They now have a crazy motherfucker with superpowers who's occupying this space as a the kid's new pseudo uncle. Unmitigated success. God, what an addition to the family. He's just as crazy as them.

Except Matt gets a call. From a very upset Foggy Nelson. Who says that they decided to burn the defunct bridge that was their relationship with their torrid bitch of a great aunt after she said something homophobic to Foggy's sister, and they went to go surprise Matt for the holidays, only to find out that he was already supposed to be with them. Matthew.

The thing is, foggy knows who Matt is as a person. He knows who Matt is as a person. There is such a very real chance that his blind best friend has been living under an overpass in subzero weather for the past few weeks and not telling him. He's having a heart attack and needs to come pick him up immediately before Matt starts selling his body or something.

And like, good news is that Matt was kidnapped by a lovely suburban family who have been keeping him warm and fed and dry, and they're going to be baking gingerbread today. The bad news is that Matt will literally have a heart attack if he has to explain to foggy how he got here so he just. Panics.

And hangs up the phone.

And matts panicking about how he hung up the phone, because foggy will absolutely call the police and report him as a missing person, holy shit will he call the police on him, Matt was literally kidnapped but he likes his kidnappers now and doesn't want them to be arrested, they're making gingerbread you see and that would be inconvenient to the gingerbread making. So Maria and Frank and the kids are watching this weird feral law student they forcibly adopted go through every single stage of grief in a two minute span, wonder how he made it through life so far on his own, and Maria wrangles the phone from him and calls Foggy back and politely tells him that this is Maria Castle, matts basically a part of their family and has been staying with them through the holidays, they've heard so much about foggy, won't he come visit? How about tomorrow at two? They're making gingerbread today.

Matt: MARIA

Matt is panicking. Foggy knows he doesn't have a family. Foggy is his family. Foggy has unlocked his tragic backstory. Foggy is going to wonder how he acquired a family in like a two and a half week span.

Foggy is panicking. He knows Matt doesn't have a family. He has unlocked matts tragic backstory. Matt was in their fucking Christmas cards because he has no family's Christmas cards to be in.

Maria is not panicking. They're taking a step back and making gingerbread now. Take deep breaths, Matthew.

FOGGY NELSON'S THEORIES ABOUT WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON WITH HIS BEST FRIEND (ABRIDGED):

Matt has started a polycule with a suburban couple and is raising their children with them now.

Matt was switched at birth and that's his newly discovered real family and he just never told Foggy.

Matt has been kidnapped by a family in the suburbs and they've enslaved him to make gingerbread with their children.

Which is true, weirdly enough.

Matt is having a spiraling panic attack because while he's like, not on deaths door anymore, he's still healing and clearly beat to shit and foggys going to think the castles did it and freak out and he doesn't have a lie for this prepped. And the castles are like "okay okay but, quick point, you've even prattling on about this kid for like, a minimum of four hours per day, you are more likely than not in love with him, have you considered the truth"

And Matt doesn't know what to do with that, is the thing.

Foggy comes by. He is four hours early. He arrived immediately after he got the address. Maria is lovely and kind and welcoming. Frank pumps his arm firmly and is built like a brickshit house and sort of intimidating.

Matt is absolutely beat to shit.

Foggy: AHAHAHA HEY BUDDY IMMA GIVE YOU A HUG BECAUSE I MISSED YOU AND LOVE YOU SO MUCH IN THIS THE SEASON OF GOODWILL AMONG MEN. did they do this to you cough twice for yes

Matt: oh for the love of god.

And the problem is. For a family that commits felonies. They're weirdly open about that fact.

Foggy: how did Matt end up staying with you

Lisa: oh we gave him Stockholm syndrome after kidnapping him

matt: ahahaha kids say the darndest things

Frankie: no really dad kept having to drag him off the windowsill when he tried to climb out and we had to be extra welcoming to him so he'd stop trying to escape

Matt: AHAHAHA KIDS SAY THE DARNDEST THINGS

Foggy told his cop friend Brett to be on standby before he came here and now he's rapidly wondering if he needs to actualize that.

There's a good deal bit more after that, but this is getting long. There's emotional honesty. There's homosexuality. There's confessions about superpowers that Matt may or may not have. There's discussing trauma.

There's the fucking shadow government showing up to recruit Matt.

The thing is that Frank Castle is one of the best military operatives, like. Ever. And SHIELD was interested in recruiting that. And they thought, hey, saving his kids may do that. And they sent Hawkeye to infiltrate the mercenaries that had taken them.

Except they were fuck-off guns there and while he could take them all out if it was just him, he'd have to be 90% crazier of motherfucker than he actually is to try that shit with two kids in the line of fire.

And then an absolutely crazy motherfucker showed up and did exactly that. Caught his arrow mid-backflip. Kicked his ass too. It was sort of sick as hell. He hasn't met anyone so good at hand to hand since black widow.

They couldn't not recruit that guy.

And like. They found him. They found him really easily. The castle family kidnapped him. It was kind of obvious.

So Clint and Coulson roll up with the recruitment pitch and Clints like "hey, haha, I'm Clint, you stabbed me, wow you're like, completely insane, I mean that literally and in a figurative impressiveness sense, want to be best friends" and matts a fucking centimeter from launching himself out the window and starting a new life in Mexico.

And coulson's good at what he does. He can tell that matts not at all buying what he's selling, is more than a little freaked out at the idea of being identified as enhanced, and is almost definitely a former child soldier if their background was accurate about who took him from his orphanage for a few months. He also knows that Matt's abilities are too unique and too useful to just walk away from them. Nothing can be hidden from him. And if a fucking nuke is missing and they need someone to sniff it out, they need to be able to set Matt loose on a city for it. So he makes the pitch of "what if I keep you out of all databases, tell no one your name, and have you as a strictly as needed member of the roster," to which Matt replies with something along the line of "you can go and get fucked with you fascist shadow agency bullshit, you fucking totalitarian nightmare freaks, you try and drag me off to your freak show org to be a fucking dog on a leash for your illegal agency and I'll bite your goddamn face off, the world would have to end for me to come within a hundred godforsaken feet of you," which is… a coarse but technically affirmative answer that Coulson takes to mean as "Yes, if the world is ending, I will come to your agency." He honestly tells him that he'll keep matts secret and leaves. And Matt is still considering the Mexico plan but decides that he has a family to keep him here now in foggy and the castles and decides to risk staying. And that's that.

Which leads into my semi-crack fic of Matt being in the original Avengers, which I won't subject you to here. but some highlights:

Matt misses the first day of world-saving because he took off the second the SHIELD guy came by to pick him up. He managed to hide for 27 consecutive hours before they dragged his ass to the helicarrier.

He wasn't briefed at all because they ask him if he read the files they gave him and he just tosses them on the table and asks "does this look like fucking Braille to you." He repeatedly threatens to sue them for a lack of ada compliance.

He keeps getting stuck in rooms because this nightmare space ship only uses screens for everything, including door handles.

The hulk: *is the hulk*

Matt, has a stick: WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO WITH THAT

Tony: in a few minutes I'll know every secret SHIELD has ever had

Matt, has listened to at least eight top secret HYDRA meetings since being locked into this fucking hell ship: MHMM

They save the day, he's in a mask, the press asks them all whats next for the avengers and he's like "well I have a day job, I'm going home" and just. Walks away.

Three weeks later he starts fighting crime of his own volition and whenever anyone mentions hey is it maybe that avenger fellow he replies to the official inquiries with "oh no you see I have a day job" which should not work but does

Of course, Matt learning about HYDRA leads into my other semi-crack fic involving Matt simply immediately telling Captain America about the fucking Nazi's, and Cap rediscovering his life's passion, which is punching some fucking Nazi's. Except, he really needs Matt to spy on HYDRA for this to work, and Matt's identity is still almost entirely secret even within SHIELD and he doesn't want to endanger that. So they embark on introducing everyone to Matt Murdock, his totally normal, blind attorney boyfriend who is not at all a superpowered ultimate spy who happens to be secretly a very reluctant Avenger. It is now a fake dating AU.

#daredevil #christmas with the castles

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im-totally-not-an-alien-2 · 1 year

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Hohoho~ I've just of an idea and you know what? This one goes out to you, @im-totally-not-an-alien-2.

Enemies to Lovers this. Fake Dating/Relationship that. Let's combine the two. Brain Dead style.

Danny is a thief. It started off with him stealing back ghostly artifacts and snowballed when he got commissioned to steal back a family heirloom that had been stolen/lost way back when. With a hefty reward of course. Danny doesm't exactly have the time to track down some heirloom through time, obviously, but he's a struggling college student at Gotham U and WOW that's a lot of 0s. So he does the next best thing. He goes back in time and gets the family heirloom right before it 'disappears'. With a job well done, he gets recommended to someone else. This continues and he grows to have quite the repuation. Que the arrival of Tim Drake.

Someone's been kicking up a fuss about some thief who's been stealing quite the pricy items, but that's not exactly on his radar, you see? HOWEVER! This mysterious thief IS person of interest on a murder case. And thus, Red Robin is on their trail.

Eventually, it culminates to a certain prickly situation. And by that, I mean, Tim knows that Danny is the thief. DANNY knows that Tim is Red Robin. Neither of them can risk outing the other without outing themselves. But Tim always has a plan and he's getting closer and closer to cracking this case and, quite possibly, bringing Danny down too.

So what does Danny do? He uses Tim as his alibi. For every time Danny is out stealing something, and someone asks where he's going or where he'd been at these certain times, what does he say? He says he was with Tim Drake. And Tim can't do anything to stop him. Not without outing himself anyways, and it doesn't help that Danny has somehow gotten ahold of his schedule to make sure that Tim can't use any other alibi. So he goes along with it.

Everyone thinks they're dating. Tim is quietly seething and frustrated, and unwillingly impressed. Danny just wishes that Tim would get off his back.

I'd love to hear an addition to this. Have a great day!

Oh gods, I love this! Did Danny get framed for murder cause I can't see him just running around killing people. Maybe it was his parents who accidentally killed someone and didnt realize it and Dannys DNA was left at the crime scene. Maybe they purposely killed someone and planted Phantoms hair there or something to "prove all ghosts are evil" or whatever.

Maybe Vlad tried to frame Danny for murder. Maybe (and this is my favorite) Danny legitimately killed Vlad either by accident or in self defense and since Vlad had willed everything to either Danny or his mom he knew the cops and ensuing media storm would never believe him.

So he ran.

Danny gets awkward whenever Tim/Red Robin brings up the murder and swears it isn't what it looks like but refuses to explain any further, even if it makes him look more guilty when he doesn't.

Dannys alibi falls apart after Tim deviates from his schedule and is on camera at the library alone or if one of his brothers says "he was with me" and Tim confirmed it, or the waynes disguise someone as Tim and give him an out that way. Maybe have fake Tim and/or fake Red Robin in the same room together to make it seem like there was no way they were the same person.

Unfortunately Phantoms comes up with another believable (and slightly embarrassing) alibi before he pulls the same trick as Tim with his duplicates. Bam, they're once again at an impasse.

This rivalry does not deter people from believing that they are either dating or super into eachother. Danny flirting with him so much doesn't help.

Worst of all his siblings are betting on when-not if- when they get together.

How dare!

#the alien answers #i hope you have a great day too #i love this one #so juicy #wait till tim finds out about ghost hunting equipment #like what if they both get caught in a trap meant for Phantom and tim discovered danny cant phase them out of it #theyre stuck for a bit and are forced to make uncomfortable small talk #they bond while being tied up in fenton fishing line #that or theyre tangled up in it and are untangling themselves as they chat

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emperiocism · 2 months

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Caught up on protocol was great but now I just want Lena and Gwen to hate-makeout sloppy style hmmmmmmmmmm

Your ask inspired me, hohoho

but also YES, especially now that they'll be working so closely together >:3

#emperios art

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arc-misadventures · 1 year

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Jeanne: Jaune how did you get only a C+ on the test we know that stuff like the back of our hands

Jaune: If we get straight A's then they will think we're prodigies and they will put us on pedestals and people will only want to be friends so we can help them

Jeanne:.... I hate it when you're right

Strategic Incompetence

Juniper: What are the greatest weak points of a, Nevermore?, Jeanne?

Jeanne: The wings; Particularly the shoulder joint.

Juniper: Correct. Jaune: The most effective way to flee from a rampaging, Grimm.

Jaune: From which kind of, Grimm?

Juniper: …

Juniper: Let’s say a… A beowulf.

Jaune: Something that can mask your sent so you can stay hidden from their superior sense of smell. Then hunker down someplace you can stay hidden.

Juniper: Correct. Jeanne: 9mm is a highly effective round to use against, Grimm: True, or false?

Jeanne: False.

Juniper: Wrong! The answer is, True!

Jeanne: While that is correct. However, the 9mm is most effective against, Creep, and Beowulf’s. It is recommended that .375 caliber rounds are used for anything else. Even larger caliber rounds should be used for larger foes, particularly against those with thicker hides.

Jaune: Recommended that most rounds a, Hunter should carry should also be, Armour Piercing.

Juniper: Uhh… Next question… Jaune!

Jaune: Yes?

Juniper: What is the average airspeed velocity of an unladen, Nevermore?

Jaune: Alpha, or Beta class, Nevermore?

Juniper: …

Juniper: Okay… H-How come you all got, B’s on your test scores?! These are all the questions you got, from that, Hunter Prep-school. You clearly know the answers to these tests. So why are you answering them wrong, are you doing it on purpose, or something?

JJ: Yes.

Juniper: …

Juniper: Okay… Why?

Jeanne: Yeah, why are we doing this again, Jaune?

Jaune: Because if we keep getting straight, A’s people will think we’re prodigies, and put us on a pedestal, and push unreasonable expectations on us. Further more, since we know things only seasoned, Hunters would know it would look suspicious. So, it is for the beat that we keep a low profile, to avoid any suspicion being place upon us.

Juniper: …

Juniper: Those… Those are some damn good reasons…

Jeanne: Yeah, I felt the same way when he said that.

Jaune: Hey, I’m just trying to keep a low profile. Considering the shear amount of stuff we know about, and the nature of the things we know about. Well, if any of it was made public, the results could be catastrophic!

Juniper: Oh, like what stuff?

Jeanne: Like if we told you it’s only a few years until yoi see your first grandchild. Imagine what would happen if we told you that?!

Juniper: G-Grandchildren…?

Jeanne: …

Jaune: Oh shit…

Juniper: H-How long until my first grandchild…?

Jeanne: Uhh…?!

Juniper: Jeanne! WHEN AM I GETTING MY FIRST GRANDCHILD?!

Jaune: Great… You’ve fucked us, Jeanne. Nice going…

Jeanne: And, not in the way I wanted us to! Oh gods, what have I done?!

Jaune: …

Jaune: Okay, I’m leaving. Have fun you two!

Jeanne: No wait! Jaune, come back! Come back!

Juniper: You best leave him, Jeanne. You know your brother, he’ll… Oh, how does he put it…? Ahh yes! “Death will take me before I tell you my secrets!” But, you, Jeanne… Oh hohoho~! You, Jeanne are another thing entirely. So tell me; Who’s going to give me my first grandchild~?

Jeanne: …

Jeanne: Help…

#rwby #jaune arc #jeanne arc #juniper arc

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ciphercalamitiez · 9 months

Text

oh god wheatley x reader x bill headcanons … [ aimed for platonic ]

I only did this because I didn’t know who to choose between (I wanted to do platonic bill and platonic Wheatley headcanons but then this idea pinged in mind..)

this MAY be a little OOC (or really OOC i hope It’s not) so uhh SORRY IF IT IS WAAAHHH (also I know you’re gonna see this Roman, hie)

—•—

hohoho oh boy. this duo you’re dealing with is past chaOTIC.

being the middle ground of these two is absolutely hellish. two talkative beings, both make bad decisions. bonus if you are just as chaotic as they are combined.

wheatley frequently argues with bill yet bill is the only one who can come up with comebacks that make sense. if anything, wheatley once screamed out “deez nuts” as an argument when bickering with the triangle guy

you can’t go a night without hearing something crash in the living room

okay arguing aside, when these two are passive with each other you three make a great trio seriously

wheatley likes to tell you about what’s on his mind and asks the dumbest shit known to man (he also asks unanswerable questions. none of them make sense) but you don’t mind yet you try to answer them, or you flat out just stare at him with confusion or idk whatever emotion, he’ll just be looking at you expectantly for your answer

bill answers the questions if you can’t first or answers after you. he makes sure his answers are as snarky as possible which makes Wheatley want to punch him (if Wheatley is human/Android in here, he will.)

cue more arguing here ☠️

anyway, hugging the two is weird but oddly nice.

if you project Wheatley to be human/android, he’s fairly awkward when it comes to hugging (he tenses up occasionally in the hug, he doesn’t mean to) and depending on his mood, his grip can be soft to rib crushing hard, either type of hugging is nice.. hopefully. he also comments on everything during the hugs unless you ask for him not to. don’t worry, he’ll be fine with shutting up or not!

if you’re hugging the wheatBALL, he can’t really hug back sadly :( but he’ll nuzzle up against you to show that he’s enjoying it!!

hugging bill can either hurt or not. his main way of hugging is probably worse than Wheatley’s rib crushing hugs so you can barely breathe in them. however if he’s feeling nice enough or he’s feeling down/not like himself, he’ll simply just limply wrap his arms around you and rest against you

DO NOT LET THESE TWO IDIOTS COOK. NONE OF THEM CAN COOK FOR SHIT OH MY GOD

you three tried to bake a cake once together (by Wheatley’s request)

The kitchen ended up in flames and shambles and there is rubble falling off the ceiling and flour everywhere

you three commit war crimes together (bill comes up with the most heinous shit to break, wheatley’s actions go unsupervised sometimes and ends up inevitably screwing the plan up, and you have to drag them out of there)

bill and wheatley are both (jokingly) mean to each other (mostly on purpose,) argument or not but are very soft towards you and you only (not really for bill but he’ll be more considerate for you, unless you’re okay with being ((halfheartedly)) jokingly insulted, then he’ll treat you a bit more like wheatley)

when they do get along they are hellish, it’s guaranteed you’ll wake up to cats by TLT playing in the living room and the two are bouncing around together and laughing, it’s actually heartwarming

so many. pillow forts. (too many pillow forts) bill enlarged the pillows and it turned into a literal soft ass kingdom, you guys even had THRONES AND PILLOW GUARDS?? truly reality warping but it’s really pretty inside the fort

bill calls dibs on being the king so he could sit on the throne all the time, that idea gets thrown off easily though when you and Wheatley bounced around. he joined in the bouncing rather than sitting around in the soft throne

you three get into cuddle piles easily and fall asleep together, Wheatley is a heavy sleeper and bill is a light sleeper most of the time. or it could be vice versa :')

despite the fact you three are mean (again mainly Wheatley and bill against each other) to each other sometimes, you all genuinely care for each other and are really close to each other

when it comes to venting out problems, bill is usually the one to show his sympathy through physical affection (such as gentle hand squeezes in understanding) meanwhile Wheatley says the more reassuring and emotion filled things. it’s a great deal fr fr

after Everytime someone vents, everyone gets back into a group hug

in summary, you three are the bomb the slay the sillies and you wouldn’t trade any of these idiots for anyone else

—•—

i was planning on only sending this in discord but it hit the limit so COUGH

#bill cipher #wheatley #portal 2 #gravity falls #platonic headcanons #it could be taken romantically too however I tried to aim for platonic whoops…#x reader #sel writes ^_^#bill cipher x reader #wheatley x reader

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lilyginnyblackv2 · 1 year

Text

Translations of Kazuki’s Instagram Posts So Far (Pre-Series - Ep. 4)

To save some space, I’ll only be translating Kazuki’s comments. I do love seeing the fans engaging with the posts though, that’s really cute! Anyway, I mostly just did this for my own personal fun and practice (since I know that there are automated translations).

The person in charge of this has done a great job of capturing his voice. It’s a really well made account and a cool way to start engagement with fans and the series + characters.

Anyway, this will be an extremely image heavy post.