#He has about 5 speaking lines and all of them are about his endless devotion to the shipwrecked dude he happened to save | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

thegeminisage · 3 years

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one of many reasons castiel spent the first year of knowing dean trying not to strangle him: dean's weird little winchester-only dialect

i’m fucking obsessed with this right now, so buckle in for a meta. a cool fun (horrible) thing about dean's dialogue is that a good 90% of what comes out of his mouth is:

a pop culture reference ("you're just gonna take some divine bong hit, and shazam, you're roma downey?")

references to real life phenomenon ("i don't wanna wake up missing a kidney in a bathtub full of ice" "try new mexico, i hear he’s on a tortilla")

these also often take the form of nicknames, and dean has a tendency to give people nicknames in general or call them something besides their given name, whether it’s affectionate or rude ("easy there, van damme" "so i’m girl interrupted" furthermore castiel = cas, ezekiel = zeke, etc, see also frequent use of "chucklehead" "asshat" and on the nicer/endearments end "buddy" "pal" "sunshine" etc)

an idiom ("a snowball's chance" "if it smells like a duck...")

slang ("drinking the koolaid" "jonesing for some hooch" not to mention the literal endless amount of words dean uses to refer to killing - gank, waste, juice, ice, etc)

a metaphor ("power up your batteries" "fly me back to my page on the calendar")

a euphemism ("cloud seeding" "i'd have given you an hour alone with her first")

sarcasm (his habit of replying "peachy" or "super" when asked how he is)

wordplay (see: the entire "vampirate" and "werepire" debacles)

completely nonsensical (guessing what happened to a magical artifact: "it was dug up by tomb raiders? it was seized by the king of the dead by warlords?")

said at lightning speed - if you pay attention, dean actually talks a LOT, usually a mile a minute (this makes me feel a way when you recall him being nonverbal for a year at age 4 but that’s another post)

slang IN ANOTHER LANGUAGE (casual usage of “guano,” etc)

a lie, a deflection, a joke, etc

or worse, something dean’s NOT saying, deliberately, because he’s one of the most repressed people on earth

the end result of all this being:

dean winchester is utterly infuckingcomprehensible.

think about this. there's an ENTIRE SECTION on EVERY SINGLE EPISODE PAGE of the spn wiki devoted to JUST explaining dean's pop culture references, because the average viewer won't have seen everything he's talking about either. they have a whole page for this called “hunter’s lingo,” but honestly, it’s not all hunters, just sam and dean’s fucking batshit communication style. even i don't understand dean half the time. SAM gets it, sam speaks it back to dean a lot in the early seasons, but that's because sam and dean are 1. practically two halves of the same person 2. FREAKS. every time we get an episode that involves outsider POV is devoted to them going "what the fuck is WRONG with them?"

enter castiel. technically speaking, the show implies that angels are omnilingual. castiel should understand every language known to man, but knowing the meaning of words doesn't help him understand the following:

pop culture references

references to real life phenomenon

nicknames

idioms

slang

metaphors

euphemisms

sarcasm

wordplay

you get the idea.

listen to me. look me in the eyes. castiel cannot understand a single fucking word that comes out of dean's mouth. my guy laid a hand on dean winchester in hell and immediately fell in love with him and has no fucking idea what he's talking about ever. because not only is dean winchester's way of speaking CLINICALLY insane, and sometimes incomprehensible even to other human beings who are not sam, castiel is an angel, and someone prone to taking things even more literally than other angels do

go back and watch and watch seasons 4-5 especially. the reason cas does so much squinting and head tilting is because every time dean opens his mouth castiel has to open up his mental "dean winchester dictionary" and translate entire paragraphs on the fly, because again, dean never shuts up!

what makes this extra hilarious to me is this gem:

this line is from 5.13. at this point cas has known dean for AN ENTIRE YEAR AND A HALF. what you see here is my guy SNAPPING. cas made an EFFORT in this scene. he asked who glenn close was. he's telling dean that he can't understand him. he is doing his level best to have a normal conversation with this guy he has a crush on and for the life of him he cannot do it (equal but opposite energy to cas blowing up the gas station and motel room in 4.01, tbh)

yes, cas can understand dean's tone. he can use context clues, and he usually gets the general idea. and when cas DOES understand dean's jokes, he laughs at them. the first time we ever see him smile is during their 4.07 heart-to-heart when dean says "it was a witch, not the tet offensive." since cas has knowledge of human history, he knows what the tet offensive is; he got the joke, and he laughed.

but as far as actual dialogue goes, he consistently struggles to keep up. even after metatron gives castiel the pop culture knowledge in season 9, cas struggles to put it to put it to proper use (dean: "you wanna just walk right into the death star?" cas: "what does a fictional battle station have to do with this?"). whenever he asks dean to clarify it's always when he’s most annoyed, like most of the time he knows it would be futile but he's too annoyed to care. (dean: "i don't know who's on first, what's on second!" cas: "what IS second???") i’m pretty sure he spends seasons 4-6 wanting to shake dean by the shoulders and ask him why he is LIKE THIS.

it takes cas - who, again, is omnilingual - YEARS to begin to acclimate to dean’s speech and start speaking that language back to him. it's season 8 before we start really hearing him use slang, season 9 before he begins to understand wordplay, season 10 before he starts using pop culture references (to other angels, who immediately fail to understand him, which disappoints him immensely), and season 11 before he really gets into metaphors. i don't remember what season he started using "yeah" instead of "yes" but i do know it took a really damn long time.

and honestly, i don't think cas truly got the hang of it until at least season 11-12. that's something like 7 or 8 YEARS. it’s more than half the time they’ve known each other at the point of the series finale.

so what's true romance, fellas? it's falling completely and totally in love with the most inexplicable person you will ever meet in your whole 4.5 billion year life, even though you have yet to understand a single thing he's ever said to you. thank you for coming to my ted talk

[spn masterpost]

#destiel #dean winchester #castiel #deancas #supernatural #liz's meta #liz makes stuff #liz's spn stuff #i have a whole other thing about how cas will code switch when he's around angels vs humans but this post is already way too long #seriously debated waiting and posting this in the morning because i want people to reblog it but fuck it! 2am meta.#season 5 cas: completely in love: i have no idea what the fuck you're saying to me. i love you. i'm going to kill you. why are you like thi

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its-miichan · 3 years

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TGCF criticisms

Spoilers and unpopular/critical opinions ahead! Beware! I tried to like this, I really did, but this novel really makes me frustrated. It clearly has so much potential, but so much of that potential was wasted on pandering romance and shallow caricatures of main characters. Overall 1.5-2 stars because it gets worse the more you think about it. CHARACTERS: 1. The main character, Xie Lian was wildly bland and boring. He is presented as the kindest, purest, most selfless person in the world, but really he was just a bland white lotus. With Xie Lian, his personality can be described in just a sentence or so, while the author's other two MC's (Wei Wuxian and Shen Qingqiu) are both charming, funny, and deep with their own motivations. Xie Lian just walks around in the story with no purpose and he says that he wants to help the common people, but he really hasn't done that! He's barely helped anyone at all, and those times he did help people are quickly followed by flirting with the ML and forgetting all about the people he was supposed to help. Honestly, in the past, Xie Lian was also the biggest jerk ever. He gave up his own friends and family's well being for his own sense of justice and was stubborn to a fault and refused to listen. What's worse is that none of these flaws are actually addressed, and the story just lets him roll with it and never actually calls him out on it. If you want to see all the reasons why he's a poorly written character, check out this reddit post: https://www. reddit. com/r/MXTX/comments/j2l9ye/why_xl_is_a_poorly_written_character_in_my_opinion/

2. The ML, Hua Cheng, is equally as bad. He is extremely shallow and such a static character, with his development in the present times being nonexistent and his development from the past to the present being wholly nonsensical. His personality is very cliche and his motivations and thoughts are left entirely up to the reader's imagination, which significantly reduces character depth. He could've been such a great character, a ghost king who rules over hell and is morally grey, but instead he is dumbed down to a Xie Lian fanboy. Everything about him not related to Xie Lian is thrown at us in a few paragraphs if at all, and what little motivation and thoughts about him we do get always fall flat. [Like apparently this guy saved him once, and he fell in love with him and became devoted to him for 800 years? Like people get saved all the time and we don't see them going 800 years and 3 deaths for a guy they've barely talked to] Also, he is wildly unlikable. Of course, this is purely subjective, but he is irritatingly smug and lords over literally everyone he meets. It doesn't help that he's an insufferable Mary Sue with an endless array of powers, intelligent as hell and knows literally everything, really good at painting, sculpting, woodworking, and on top of that the richest, most powerful, most handsome, and most charismatic man in the book. His biggest flaw is supposed to be his insecurity and inferiority complex, but that barely ever comes up and 90% of the time he is arrogant and smug. More information on why he's badly written here: https://www. reddit. com/r/MXTX/comments/iskkp5/why_hc_is_a_bad_character_in_my_opinion/

3. The side characters in my opinion are written far better, but obviously quite underdeveloped. They are all three dimensional and have their own thoughts, emotions, and feelings as well as a believable backstory, but so many of them are quickly offed to make way for the main couple, some of them not only not becoming better, but actually getting quite a whole lot worse. Qi Rong, who was supposed to be super strong demon that is one of the 4 great evils becomes a comedic relief gremlin who just shows up for some comedy and then leaves. Feng Xin and Mu Qing, the MC's childhood caretakers disappear for like 100 chapters after we're given their backstories and then once they reappear, they don't do anything either. Shi Qingxuan, who in my opinion is by far the best character in the book, has his arc left open with no ending at all, only to be forgotten about for 80+ chapters only to reappear completely the same with no character growth at all. All of this is because the main couple take up so much of the book, and the rest of the side characters and their character growth is sabotaged for the author's ego so that the main couple can look better and get more screen time.

4. I lost interest in the story pretty quickly due to the bland characters and their out of place romance and how unlikable they were. A lot of this novel was very surface level, and it's pretty on paper, but when you think about the characters a bit longer, the more bland and shallow they become.

PLOT: 1. The plot was... There was no plot. It was just a collection of monster of the day arcs that aimlessly meander about and then everything returns to the status quo once they return to Xie Lian's temple/home. Obviously books 4 and 5 were a lot more to my taste because the writing was a lot more concise and the pacing was less slow and pointless, as well as actually incorporating fantasy elements and shaking up the status quo. However, the other 3 books, especially books 1 and 2 had way too much fan service, pointless romance, and plot lines that don't go anywhere and don't contribute to the story.

2. The past plot line, or the flashbacks were pretty interesting, except for how b*tchy the MC was. Book 2 has a lot of important information and some action, but a lot of it was boring fluff that didn't really contribute to the story other than introducing the villain and showing how XL and HC met. The rest, we're literally told already and there's no new information. Book 4 was supposed to be suffering heavy, and I agree that the character development was alright, but it was too brooding and oppressive. In the end, I just stopped feeling bad for Xie Lian because of how bad the story was trying to make you feel for him. I was not invested in him, and although he was significantly more deep in this book than in the other 4, the bad logic is still there. [you wanna kill people but then someone gives you a bamboo hat and you're all sunshine and rainbows again?] The suffering is excessive in my opinion, and although it's supposed to provide contrast to the romance, it just feels done in poor taste. seriously, 20 chapters straight of suffering is not necessary, and the pacing and tone suffers because of this. The flashbacks really don't contribute too much to XL or HC's character development, but is just there to be angsty and cryp*rn.

3. The final battle was the most unbelievable thing I've ever read. All the gods got together and the first part seemed pretty epic as we got to see all the side characters finally showcase their powers.... Until the MC and ML show up. The MC and ML show up, and instantly the background extras—excuse me I mean side characters, go back into hibernation as the main couple show off how cool and powerful they are. And then we get to the final confrontation, which has our MC, ML, and MC's two friends face off against literally the most powerful being in the freaking universe. I thought it would be a tense fight scene with lots of close calls, but I was so disappointed. Instead the ML is so OP that he breaks the spells binding MC's powers, and MC becomes so overpowered and slams the big boss into the wall with the power of love while his two friends just stand there doing nothing.

4. A lot of what happens in the flashback is directly Xie Lian's fault, but the book never seems to register it? I won't go into detail on this point since it's already covered in the first Reddit thread, but basically because of XL's s*upidity and refusal to listen to anyone else, the people around him suffer.

WRITING: 1. The writing wasn't great. It was very choppy and as I said previously, very monotonous and monster-of-the-day. Yes there were great scenes which got to me, but most of it was really boring and descriptions and dialogue dragged on and on with no end, and with the bland MC, it wasn't even interesting such as the dialogue in MDZS was. Side arcs were introduced with no warning and ended with no warning, leaving the reader wondering "Why was that even there in the first place if it was just going to be forgotten about?"

2. The water demon/wind god arc. The opening and most of the middle of this arc was extremely good, the logic and mystery was written well, and Shi Qingxuan's (the wind god) antics were funny. But after the big reveal and the tense climax, the story just... stops. Like it's literally forgotten about. [The MC gets dragged out by his all powerful lover, they romance some more, and forget all about Shi Qingxuan who is literally left in the hands of the second or third most powerful demon ever who is also his mortal enemy]

3. The incessant flirting really got on my nerves. The tension and tone of the entire story got completely ruined because of the MC and ML flirting and the MC blushing and giggling while the ML teases him and everyone else is literally fighting for their lives. This felt very fan-service like, and it felt like the author stopped trying and just fed us dog food after an emotionally taxing arc so that she wouldn't have to close out the arc properly, completely destroying the tone. Speaking of the tone, the tone whiplash was just... wow. You're fed fluff and romance during or after a high tensity and highly emotional scene with no connection at all, and you're just supposed to accept it instead of wondering what's happening to the characters you actually care about.

4. Romance and side arcs quite disconnected from the story. Quite frankly, most of this book is just romance with the plot and characters put in second place because "lOOk hOw CuTe the COuPLe iS!" You could literally take out all the side arcs and the story would literally be no different. The romance overtakes the entire plot and becomes the main point of the story. With her other two books, the romance is like the icing on the cake. With this book, the icing overtakes the cake and becomes the cake.

5. Perhaps one of the biggest reasons I was uninterested through most of the book was due to the lack of tension and suspense. The flashbacks were better in the sense that Xie Lian was helpless and couldn't figure anything out, which was why he was just as likely to get hurt as anyone, making the stakes significantly higher. But in the present, with the existence of Hua Cheng, that tension is completely gone. This is because HC knows basically all there is to know, and what he doesn't know he can figure out in seconds. Additionally, he is super powerful to the point that anything that can harm XL can be one shot K.O'ed by him. At this point the conflict becomes trivial to the point where I'm just asking "why are we solving this mystery anyways when HC can just blast it into oblivion?"

6. The fact that HC does the bare minimum in arcs frustrates me. If you're going to include a character with powers that will basically deem any threat against them null, then actually use them at least! HC's apathy does not feel like a coherent part of his character, but an excuse for MXTX to drag out plot lines and make things unnecessarily long and winded. Additionally, his apathy is contradictory. On one hand, he is super overprotective of XL and wants to make sure he won't get hurt a single bit, but on the other hand, he has this advanced ideology of the 21st century that he believes XL is capable so won't constrain him as much. If anything, they should start out with HC as this overprotective follower and have a dysfunctional relationship, and end up with XL teaching HC that he is able to do things and doesn't mind doing them, and that HC can live a life outside of him as well. That would've introduced some narrative stakes and romantic tension, but no, MXTX just had to make these characters perfect in every way.

ROMANCE: 1. The logic is so flawed here. The reason that HC started loving XL is literally because Xie Lian saved him once as a child and therefore he will devote his entire life to XL, not caring about literally anything else. The reason that XL started loving HC is even more so. The thing is someone like say Shi Qingxuan has done every bit as much for XL as HC has, but we don't see XL fall in love with SQX, do we? HC literally listens to him talk and XL falls in love with him, and although it does make sense due to XL being lonely for 800 years, how low the bar is set really bothers me.

2. The constant blue-balling was annoying. At some point, the ignorant MC became annoying and self indulgent instead of cute, and having it be drawn out over nearly 200 chapters makes it even worse. The MC is supposed to be super intelligent, but he literally misses all of the super obvious hints the ML drops at him, which is so weird.

3. It felt like MXTX (the author) went overboard on the romance here. Like she tried way too hard to the point where it was obvious she wanted to make this "the most romantic CP ever". The aesthetics went so overboard with butterflies and flowers as romantic themes, thousands of lanterns, the red string of fate (which didn't even do anything in the actual story), poetry, etc.

4. The romance could almost be described as kind of creepy. Like the ML obsesses over the MC for 800 years, isolating himself from the world and not taking any side of the story besides MC's is supposed to be romantic, but it really isn't. The ML carves thousands of statues of the MC, which is sweet in a way, but also really, really creepy. To quote someone from NovelUpdates who put it 100x better than I could: " They don't feel like equal lovers, HC obviously worships XL to an unbelievably amazing degree while XL only knew he existed from only a while ago (Is this obsession? Stalker-ish? I know his stalker-ish tendencies are usually played for laughs, but realistically?) HC very very very rarely calls XL by his given name but with GeGe or CrownPrince, dude has a name you know. I know you feel lower than XL, but seriously man, the guy's your life partner. HC would destroy the world if XL said to. He'd probably try to talk to XL first, confirm things, but if at the end XL really does want it, HC would do it. He lives for XL, he has no other reason to do something aside for XL. No reason to say NO for himself. They're not equals in which one wanna do something bad, the other would stop him because they have their own convictions. You can't tell me one only lives for one person's sake, will do anything for that guy, and has no attachments in the world aside from that guy, is a healthy person. It may seem romantic, but when you actually think about it, it becomes uncomfortable."

5. The romance was really cheesy. There were some powerful moments, but it was mostly flirting and "he fell on top of me" or "he needs mouth to mouth". Most of it was just the ML flirting with the MC, which you may like if you like this kind of stuff, but I really didn't enjoy it. Overall, I was desperate to love this novel, but I couldn't because of the shallow characters, unlikable main pair, and the constant abandonment of great plot lines in favor of the shallow romance. It felt like MXTX was constantly trying to one-up MDZS in angst, drama, and romance, but at the same time it felt like she didn't know what to do with the characters and world, and therefore fed us fan service and took the easy way out. This review is purely subjective, and if you want to read this go ahead, but I'll be seeing myself out.

#tgcf criticism #tianguancifu #tgcf #mxtx critical #xie lan #hua cheng #ok but this kinda sucks

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philliamwrites · 3 years

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The Dawn Will Come [Chpt.6]

Fandom: Fire Emblem Three Houses

Pairing: Dimitri x Reader, Claude x Reader, Edelgard x Reader, Yuri x Reader, Edelgard x Byleth, lots of minor pairings

Tags: #gn reader, # platonic love byleth & reader, #reader is a tactical unit, #angst, #slow burn, #subplots, #unreliable narrator, #pining, #remporary amnesia, #reluctant herp, #canon divergence, #lost twin au, #many chapters, #original content

Words: 5.1k

Summary: Waking up in a forest without any knowledge of your past and who you are, you join the house leaders of the Officers Academy to search for a way to return your memories. Unfortunately, the church has different plans for you, and Fate places you in the centre of a cruel game with deadly stakes. It certainly doesn’t help to fall in love with a house leader who is doomed to be your demise.

Notes: Chapter 5 | Chapter 7

Chapter 06: From The Beyond

Ah! It is well for the unfortunate to be resigned, but for the guilty there is no peace.

[Mary B. Shelley, Frankenstein]

Thinking back on it later, the events during Garland Moon were probably what set the hare running toward its demise. Not that any of you could have known that. Not the students who joyfully spend their days in cherished halls where daylight passes through coloured glass; not Byleth with her gift to correct past mistakes with a flick of her wrist and change the course of time; not you with your foresight to see what dangers await in the future and prepare a different path for those you care for to walk safely.

Thinking back on it later, everything that followed surely ascribed to and served Fate, and not even Sylvain could charm her with his silver tongue and golden wit, for Fate’s lover is Time and she does not look kindly upon those who enslave him.

Maybe that is why things turned out the way they did for Byleth and you.

But that future is still far away and every single one of you still believes the goddess has Fate tightly leashed to her side, her benevolence endless and spreading to every corner in Fódlan.

That is why you don’t think too much about it when one day, Seteth disturbs your seminar, a deep frown settled in his features as you explain how to turn an ambush to your advantage to the students.

“Apologies for the disturbance, Herald. Lady Rhea asks to see Ashe.”

The boy gives a pitiful squeal but is up on his feet nonetheless. “Me? Why?”

“You will see. Please come.” Seteth holds the classroom’s door open.

You nod, a little worried about the frightened glance Ashe sends your way like he hopes you can actually say no and decline Rhea’s command. An encouraging smile is everything you can give him on his way before the door shuts behind him. Its sound wakes everyone else from their slumber and it takes a few minutes to reclaim order and their attention. It certainly does help that the Blue Lion House isn’t as chaotic as a certain other, not to name any names.

Said house proves again to be more difficult to teach. Or tame. You didn’t have the courage to ask why they thought it was a good idea to see whose shoe would leave the darkest stain on Claude’s bedroom’s ceiling. Even days after their mischief students kept talking about how they have never seen Seteth this furious.

“Herald, please,” Hilda cries, tragically draped over the back of her chair, a maiden in bittersweet agony over her loss of free time. “It was all Claude’s fault.”

“Liars never prosper,” Claude calls from the far back of the room. He’s hunched over his papers, working vigorously on Seteth’s punishment. He ordered them to write hundred times I shall not throw footwear against any ceiling in the monastery. They’ve been at it for about twenty minutes and Claude’s quill hasn’t stopped its furious scratching against parchment at all.

“I won’t mess with Seteth,” you tell them and lean dangerously far back on your chair to place your feet on the teacher’s desk. “And you deserve it. Or do they not teach you proper manners in your noble homes?”

“Well, it’s not like anyone taught us not to do it,” Hilda chirps. You throw a glare her way and she quickly dugs her head and continues writing. Quills scratch on paper for about seven seconds before Hilda stops again.

“Herald,” she says. “What do you think about Lady Catherine’s Thunderbrand?”

You look up from your book titled Noticeable War Generals. Smile gone from her face, Hilda looks up at you with sharp curiosity. It’s eerily silent now, and a quick glance towards Claude shows he is listening as well.

Catherine’s Thunderbrand. Its sight is still burned into the back of your closed eyes: Golden ivory forged into a grotesque sword, a blood red Crest Stone in its middle that seemed to pulsate—as if it breathed. As if it was a living thing with a heart. You had simply stared at it in awe and thought What a mesmerising weapon.

“It’s … fascinating,” you manage. “A Hero’s Relic. There are more than just Thunderbrand, right?”

“Ten exist,” Claude calls from the back. “Bestowed by the goddess upon ten heroes, they are passed down to their descendants. House Riegan and House Goneril have one in their possession as well.”

“Then why don’t you use it?” You certainly wouldn’t miss a chance to own and wield a mighty weapon like that.

“Wield that?”Hilda shudders in disgust. “No thank you. It looks so weird, pulsating and moving like an insect.”

“And we’re way too inexperienced to use it in a real battle.” Claude puts his quill between his nose and upper lip and tries to hold it there. “They’re locked away anyway and hidden from those who might misuse their power.”

Claude has a point. Nonetheless, you’d gladly take a look at them. Maybe even hold one … Did the Herald own one as well? A special weapon only forged for the Herald. A slight shudder runs down your spine at the thought of using it in battle.

Ten minutes later, Claude jumps to his feet. He hurries towards you, slams his parchments on the table and leaves just as fast. “Bye Herald!”

“No way!” Hilda pales. “How is he so fast?”

You wonder as well and take a look at his papers. Instead of writing what Seteth has told them, Claude simply left poor drawings of their crime and promised with one sentence he wouldn’t do it again.

And we of House Riegan never break our promises, reads the last line.

You groan. Now it’s your turn to think about a good explanation to Seteth’s questions why you haven’t paid more attention.

Month three passed within the blink of an eye. Garland Moon brought the sweet smell of white roses to Garreg Mach, a tradition much anticipated by the students. Everywhere you went, garlands and gifts made of white roses were given to each other as a sign of friendship or budding love. Some found their way to your desk, though your admirers preferred to stay anonymous whereas Byleth was busy to stow them somewhere—not a day passed without her receiving something or a group of giggling students following her around.

“I really don’t know what to do with all those flowers,” she told you one day during a tea session, a deep frown on her face. “They wilt. Then I throw them away. It’s a waste.”

“Your students love it,” you replied but were glad not to be in her place.

Another good deed Garland Moon brought with it is longer days and shorter nights. Students lounged outside in their summer uniforms after class, enjoying those last warm days before raining season arrived with fierce gusts and heavy pouring, forcing them back inside where they spent their free time inside the library or the dining hall, playing little games to kill time.

For a change of pace, Byleth and Jeralt decided they’d hold a grilled fish dinner on every last day of each week and most of the invited either didn’t have the heart or the courage to tell them once every week was once every week too much.

Everything happened too fast after that. Rhea informed the teacher’s faculty and her Knights of Lord Lonato Gaspard’s planned rebellion against the church. With that, the mystery of why Seteth had demanded to speak with Ashe was solved; it also explained why he spent so much time inside the chapel, praying and wondering himself about his adoptive father’s reasoning.

“There is no question about it,” Rhea says in her cool, demanding voice once every teacher and Knight of Seiros gathered inside the War Room to discuss the matter. “We will send a troop to meet them halfway in Kingdom Territory. They will pay for mocking our goddess.”

“Allow me to lead the Knights, Lady Rhea,” Catherine says. Even now, you can’t take your eyes off Thunderbrand strapped on her back. “I know Gaspard and what he’s capable of.”

“We did not forget what you’ve done back when—” Seteth starts. Catherine silences him with one look, leaving no doubt she doesn’t wish to speak of it.

“And that is exactly why I have to go.”

Rhea nodded. “So be it. I know I leave this mission in your capable hands.”

“But why is he leading this rebellion?” you wonder. “I thought the Kingdom is strongly devoted to Seiros’ teachings.”

“Every flock has its black sheep,” Rhea says, sounding sad. “We will get our answers once we defeat and capture them.”

“What about the surrounding villages and those who support Gaspard’s rebellion but don’t fight?” Byleth asked. Until now, you haven’t really thought of those not directly involved in it, but she does make a good point.

Rhea squared her shoulders. “What about them?”

“They’re not directly involved but might try to get in our way.” Byleth glanced at the strategic map laid out before her. There is a way through the forest for your units to approach Lonato’s stronghold. Surrounding villages are marked with a red pin. They surround the forest in a loose circle, making an intrusion possible, though sending Knights of Seiros out to watch them and stop them could be quite easy—

“Everyone who supports this foolish rebellion should receive the rightful punishment,” Rhea says, her voice so cold it freezes your thoughts of how to make the villagers stay out of this. Your head snaps up as you stare at her. Byleth raises an eyebrow but remains silent just like everyone else. Something about that makes you shudder.

“But they’re civilians, right? If we can avoid having them interfere—”

“By joining Lonato Gaspard’s rebellion they pledge guilty to his cause.” Rhea looks up at you, scorn flashing briefly in her eyes. “I will not have them simply go if it opens the possibility for revenge one day.”

If you squinted really hard, there was reason behind her words. Still, your stomach turned at the thought of endangering civilians even though it could be prevented. Without any protests, that was the plan for the operation.

You sat this one out. There was much to prepare for the upcoming Rite of Rebirth, a ceremony when the Church of Seiros and its believers unite to pray for the return of the goddess. Even though you wouldn’t call yourself a believer—many find it strange that you remember the way of war but not the way of the Church as if you lived somewhere without Seiros’ teachings—your presence was of outmost importance as well. Though after you heard how the mission went, you really wished you had joined the Blue Lions fighting against Gaspard instead of sitting around and deciding which ceremonial robes fit better.

Loud voices drift through the closed door of a classroom, voices you immediately recognise belonging to Dimitri and Byleth.

“Are you insane?” You flinch back even though a heavy wooden door separates you from what is undoubtedly Dimitri’s wrath. “Those were civilians.”

A reply is lost, too quiet for you to hear, but whatever Byleth said, it wasn’t the right thing. A second later, Dimitri storms through the doors. The distress in his features stops you from asking what is wrong, a flash of betrayal lurking in his eyes seals your mouth shut. You look after him until he disappears around the corner, only slowly turning towards Byleth. She is propping herself up on the table, learning on her strong arms and staring at the opposite wall, her mouth a grim line—solid rock that stands against the raging waves summoned by Dimitri, her grip on the edge of the table hard enough to turn her knuckles white.

“Everything okay?” An unnecessary question answered by a simple shake of her head. You lean your hips against the table. “Do you want to talk about it?”

Byleth is silent. Only slowly, like a tight knot finally coming lose, the tension in her shoulders dissipates and she takes a long, deep breath.

“Dimitri told me about their mission. How they dealt with Lord Lonato’s revolt.” She finally steps away from the table and kneads the muscles in her shoulders. You imagine they’re hard like a rock. “They faced simple peasants who defended their Lord. Peasants who didn’t even know how to wield a sword without cutting their own thumbs off.”

“And Rhea made quite clear how to deal with them,” you finish, summoning unwanted imaginations about a gruesome butchery in your mind. Byleth nods.

“Dimitri asked for my advice,” she continues, her gaze drifting towards the door as if said young man might return like a bad haunting if his name is simply muttered. “If there was anything they could have done different. I told him there wasn’t.” She tears her eyes away from the door and fixes them on you. “I told him that is the way of war.”

She is right, a part of you insists. Such facts cannot be changed and claiming anything different is foolish, naive. Yet, something stirs, a tiny tiny voice, a feeling, that challenges that thought. A feeling you didn’t expect to be part of you.

“I don’t know about the details,” you say, shuffling from left to right, “but maybe it was avoidable. Lord Lonato must have known how his subjects felt about it. He didn’t need to involve them.”

“I think they joined on their own. The students gave them a chance to lay down their weapons.”

“Still—”

“Still they decided to follow their foolish Lord,” a voice from the door joins, cold and imperious, chilling you to the bone. Rhea enters the War Room, her expression void of any warmth or kindness. “There is no place for doubt. We must punish any sinner who may inflict harm upon believers, even if those sinners are civilians.”

“And you think to have the students punish them is right?” Byleth asks, earning a sharp glare from Rhea. She quickly, but somewhat begrudgingly adds, “Your Grace.”

“I have heard that some students struggled with completing the task,” Rhea acknowledges, doing her best to show how unaffected she is by Byleth’s criticism. “I pray they learnt a valuable lesson about the fate that awaits all who are foolish enough to point their blades towards the heavens.”

An icy shudder crawls up your spine, cold fingers tighten around your throat to keep you silent—a leash forged of obedience and intimidation, the mistress standing before you. It would be wise to keep your mouth shut, not draw unnecessary attention; keep your head low and nothing can slice it from your shoulders. But the words, burning hot on your tongue, demand freedom.

“Fearing the Church isn’t the same as respecting it.”

Something sharp flashes in Rhea’s eyes. “If fear is the only way to control them, then so be it. They are traitors to the holy teachings.”

“They are people. People with families.”

“People who would be wise to remember it was the progenitor god who gave them these lands and their life,” Rhea answers, growing impatient. She notices something in the way you look at her, for she takes a moment to collect herself by taking a deep breath. “I do not enjoy seeing those who wronged our holy teachings punished, Herald,” she continues, now much calmer. “But punish them we must before they hurt those who are dear to us.” Upon her last words, her eyes dart to Byleth, looking at her with so much fondness and care, a sting of jealousy in your chest forces you to avert your gaze to the ground. It isn’t the first time you notice Rhea’s palpable interest in Byleth’s wellbeing though no answer comes to mind why it is like that. If Byleth noticed the same, she doesn’t show it.

After that, the incident is quickly forgotten, making room for the new incident occupying everyone’s mind: an assassination plot on Rhea on the day of the Rite of Rebirth found in Lonato’s possession. You aren’t the only one wondering why he’d carry something like that around where it’s easy to find. Multiple theories go around, one more farfetched than the other. One particular makes sense, its source none other than sharp witted Claude who thinks this plot is a simple distraction for something much bigger.

“If security is focused on the Rite of Rebirth inside the Goddess’ Tower, pretty much anyone can simply stroll around the monastery and do who knows what,” he told you on the day Byleth and her class set out to discover what important places might become a target. Garreg Mach hides many secrets and treasures. Some of them even you are not allowed to see like relics passed down from archbishop to archbishop, guarded by the elite of the Knights of Seiros, tall and bulky men and women with grim mouths and determined eyes rooting them in place day and night in front of locked doors only Rhea knows what they hide.

With every passing day, tension hangs in the air like a thick blanket waiting to smother you all. But it isn’t simply the anticipation for whatever the Western Church has planned. It is also the holy ceremony of the Rite of Rebirth, one you’ve practised under the stern eyes of Seteth who doesn’t settle for anything less than perfect. Every word, every step is engraved in your mind.

On the day of the Rite of Rebirth the sun relentlessly blazes down at the monastery. Your ceremonial robes are heavy and woven from thick jacquard fabric lined with fine golden patterns that depict the Herald’s Crest on the back. You’ve barely finished preparing everything inside the round chamber inside the Goddess’ Tower but perspiration glues your hair to your forehead.

A whole feast is prepared; food offerings and gifts from the townsfolk and priests served on golden and silver plates on long tables covered with white table clothes. In the middle Seteth prepared a small platform for Rhea to stand and speak in honour of the goddess that she may return to Fódlan and show its people her infinite grace. In short, you’d do anything to join the students who are securing the locations lacking in defence right now instead of standing around and waving at pilgrims. The only joy lies in Flayn’s bright presence and her never ending optimism. She’s a sweet girl and has been looking forward to the ceremony since the beginning of Blue Sea Moon. Looking upon her, it is hard not to catch her excitement and joy when the ceremony finally begins.

Because of certain circumstances you couldn’t quite follow, the holy relic used for the ceremony, the Chalice of Beginnings, has been missing for a long time. Because of that, a mock chalice was prepared by the cardinals, a handful of high authority men and women who make it no secret they can’t quite decide if they like or dislike you and your position.

“You must excuse them,” one of the cardinals says after a group of them simply shook their heads at you happily scooping tons of food on a plate. His dark hair falls to his shoulders and unlike the other cardinals, his brown eyes are filled with kindness. “They simply think in old patterns and value their old traditions. You are quite young, Herald. They don’t know how to handle that.”

“But you do?” you wonder and notice too late how unfriendly that sounds. But he simply laughs.

“I do frequent with young folk, yes,” he says. “They are my flock and I will do anything to protect them.”

“That again, Aelfric?” Catherine joins you and slaps his shoulder just when he was about to drink from his cup. You pretend the pastries on your plate are far more interesting than watching him choke on wine. “You’re way too good for them, you know?”

“Who is ‘them?’” you ask but Catherine just sways her hand as if he wants to get rid of a nasty fly.

“Unimportant. You did a good job carrying the chalice to the podium.”

“I did almost trip over these.” You pluck at the heavy robes, already looking forward to getting out of them.

Catherine laughs but it is short lived. Out of nowhere, a knight hurriedly approaches and leans over to her, muttering, “They are after the tomb of Saint Seiros.”

Glass shatters as her grip tightens around the fragile stem but without so much as noticing it she storms towards Rhea, fury blazing in her eyes. Something happened. Something far more exciting than playing a believer in front of everyone, so you follow her to listen in more.

“Those dastards from the Western Church infiltrated the Holy Mausoleum,” she says. Rhea pales. “I will take some knights and go there at once.”

“Go and be swift, Catherine.” Rhea’s words are barely a puff of breath, those news shaking her but she remains stoic in front of everyone to prevent panic. Her voice drops dangerously low. “Punish those heathens.”

Catherine’s head dips in a slight bow. “I will, Your Grace.”

“I want to help too.”

Both turn around at your voice. Catherine narrows her eyes to sharp slits, but it is Rhea who says, “No. I need you here for the ceremony, Herald.”

“Please, let me,” you beg. Something inside you demands to follow, demands to see what is inside the Holy Mausoleum that causes so much bloodshed. “I can’t explain, but I need to be there.”

Rhea presses her lips into a thin line. Before she reopens her mouth to decline your wish, you whirl around and leave the ceremony room, Catherine in hot pursuit. You manage halfway down the hallway before she reaches you and grabs your arm hard.

“Even though you are the Herald, I won’t allow you to show this disrespect towards Her Grace,” she snarls. “If she tells you to stay, you listen.”

“I don’t expect you to understand,” you say, trying to free your arm from her bone breaking grip. “But something calls me to this place and I need to follow it.”

Catherine isn’t pleased but she knows better than do you any real harm. With a crude nod, she allows you to follow. Several knights wait for you and together you make your way through the warm evening air towards the Holy Mausoleum that lies behind the chapel.

You enter right before chaos erupts. At the end of the hall, its ceiling so high up it’s barely visible in the dark, Byleth stands tall and rises a sword that flashes in a bright red light. A throb goes through your body and brings you to your knees. It feels like an arrow drove into your chest, the stinging pain unlike anything you’ve felt before—no, it’s a pain you haven’t felt since the Crest appeared on your eye for the first time. And then that thrumming energy within you exploded, a sharp crimson that drenched every corner of your right vision, rushing through your veins.

“Kill them!” an enemy mage commands, fury fuelling him to a last desperate attack. With his remaining companions, they summon a giant fire spell you’ve only read about in books, a combination of spells into a group flame that covers a large area—the pre-stage to a much more fatal blaze that can scorch the land. Blaze or no, the effect watching the giant fire ball curling and sparking until it grows large enough to wipe out anything in its way is the same. Fear paralyses your body. Move, your mind screams, but you can’t. Your muscles have locked up; a high whine of terror fills your head and fizzes in your blood like poison, yet you do not understand where this fear of fire comes from.

“Take cover!” Catherine roars but it is too late. The blast hits the ground right before you, dispersing your small group of reinforcements like wind scattering leaves in all directions. A loud crack beneath you makes your heart skip a beat, a rumble shakes the hall and before you can fully comprehend what is happening, the ground gives way.

The last thing you hear is Byleth shouting, not Herald, but your name before you plunge into darkness.

Wake up.

You have to wake up.

This darkness is terrifying, so utterly black and choking, curling around you like a tight fist. Like someone is holding you in their dirty, tainted clutches, smelling of death and horror. Wake up, you tell yourself, more urgent now, your mind struggling to escape from claws digging into your consciousness, their goal unknown but you don’t want to stay here to find out what they are after. What they want to take from you.

Wake up, this time another voice, the voice, echoing like a sweet bell’s chime, the flicker of light in a darkness so black it hums. You have to wake up.

Your eyes snap open, the sudden white ceiling hurting like a sudden flash of light. Once you’re used to the brightness, you realise this isn’t a room, this is … this is your consciousness—no walls, no windows. It’s just a space, and yet you can clearly determine borders. Somewhere is an exit you’re free to use, nothing holds you captive. It’s your safe place. Your haven. Which doesn’t explain how you’ve gotten here.

All you know is it feels safe. It feels like a warm embrace, the feeling of hope, watching a budding flower embraced by soft, fragile hands—asteritrope, your mind provides out of nowhere, the flower always turning its head towards the Blue Star.

It is like breaking a spell. First, everything is simply white, empty, a second later, you stand in a vast field of asteritropes, an ocean of purple, gently swaying flowers at your feet. Everything smells of sweet innocence, of honey dipped fingers and bittersweet regret. It is a familiar scent, one your body remembers and reacts to with a shudder so strong it rattles deep in your bones; a chill so cold it freezes you on the spot, the slightest movement threatening to shatter you entirely.

What is this grief, this sadness? Is it your own or have you fallen into a sea of tears wept by someone else? Your chest is heavy with a burden, a pulling towards the unknown that is yet so familiar. It is homesickness towards a place you have never been but long to visit.

The flowers shaped like little stars stretch beyond what you think are the edges of this place. If this is a dream, you don’t want to wake up anytime soon, relishing in this peace and quiet.

A peace and quiet that lasts only a moment until you notice it. Not it, him. In the middle of the field, a boy sits, bent over something that demands his complete attention. Dark curls fall against pale skin, his brows pulled tightly together as his fingers work something in his lap. He is wearing a simple white robe, though it is unlike any of the religious wear you've seen on the priests and nuns; it seem ... too old for that. Only after you approach, you see he is folding purple flowers and green steams into a crown.

“Hello?” you say, only now entertaining the idea you might have died and this is the afterlife, the first point before returning to the goddess’ side. It is a strangely tranquil thought. “Can you hear me?”

The boy’s head snaps up, his eyes wide as he momentarily forgets his work, and you take a step back, struck by how bright his steel grey eyes are. They roam over you, up and down, back up again, as he slowly raises to his feet.

“You’re here,” he says, awestruck. “You’re finally here. It is so nice to meet you after all this time.”

His voice is like a punch to your gut. You recognise it immediately, the voice who pulled you back from the darkness.

“You—” Nothing makes sense. “Who are you? What are you?”

“There is nothing to fear,” he says, offering you his hand. The tips of his fingers are purple from handling delicate petals. The crown lies at his bare feet, forgotten. He looks strangely vulnerable.

You take another step back, worry a steady, hard pulse against your neck. The air catches in your lungs. You feel like the ground is opening beneath your feet. “Are you … the goddess? A god?”

The boy blinks, then throws his head back and bursts out laughing, the sound like sweet bells chiming in the wind. “You people love to call everything you do not understand god.”

“Then what are you?” It comes out as a breath, and for a brief second you think it’s fear that seizes your body, but no. You should be afraid and yet instead of frenzy panic there is a calm spreading inside you as if you belong here. You can’t say if it’s the boy’s presence or the familiar scent of wildflowers.

The boy leans his head to the side, his smile as vibrant as early sunlight casting away leftover shadows from a dark night. “Hmmm … the End, perhaps? Or why not just … a friend?”

“The end? My end?”

“No, the end is never simply the end,” he says, shaking his head.

“Is that supposed to reassure me?”

“It may be a rebirth,” he continues. “Or the passing into a new era. Into a new dawn.”

“A new dawn,” you mumble. The realisation makes your knees weak. “Don’t tell me—” You suck in a sharp breath, unable to belief where your thoughts are hurling towards in lightning speed. You kneel onto the soft flowerbed, careful not to crush any flowers. “Why are we here … do you know me by chance?”

“I … cannot say for sure,” he starts slowly, uncertainty turning his features even younger. “I have been watching you since you awoke four moons ago. On that day, I as well awoke from a deep slumber. But I do not know why it is you that I am bound to.”

“Bound to?” Your head spins. “What do you mean?”

“You must have felt it by now, have you not? I am here because of this,” he says, and lifts his hand to point at your right eye. You flinch back as if he smacked you right across your face.

“So you are him,” you whisper, a shudder ripping through your body. “You’re the first Herald. You are Seiros’ Champion.”

The boy smiles.

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lovecolibri · 3 years

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SaL anon here and feeling like we haven't had a Michael song in a while, so let's talk about Watermark. I love the music for this song so much, it gives the song a sad quality but it's so soft and delicate. If you replace the idea of the sea with space the lyrics fit Michael so well, but I fluctuate as to the singer(Alex, Nora, and Sanders all come to mind, if I really want to get in the feels I think of Alex singing to Michael before he leaves the planet). The imagery too is absolutely gorgeous

I don't know why I always think this song is instrumental when I think of the name and hear the opening, something about the dreamy quality makes me think of like, impressionism and softly fuzzy paintings and my mind just goes, "Oh yes, the instrumental one!" But man these lyrics are sooo good. I love reading through them because the music can lull you into missing them but they are quite lovely and very good for Michael!

you were carved out of the sea, watermarked by our ancestry. in a tug of war between the tide and me, what felt like loss was a victory, as you were swept ashore like bottles holding prayers.

So I totally see what you mean about this being sung to Michael from someone else's perspective. Per the song notes from Ryan "i wrote it from a parent's perspective, speaking to their child, encouraging him/her to live bravely" which I think is lovely an this verse especially highlights that with lines like "watermarked by our ancestry" and the imagery of Michael being pulled between his alien side and human life, especially marked in that moment he chose between Alex and his mom in Caulfield which was a loss for Michael, but a victory for Nora because he lived which was always the most important thing. (Catch me refusing to ever forgive CAM for giving Michael such a delightfully sweet and devoted and loving mother and NEVER LETTING THEM INTERACT UNTIL 5 SECONDS BEFORE SHE DIED. *screams into pillow* It's fine. I'm fine.) Also love the "message in a bottle" imagery which also fits with there being secrets still locked away from when Michael was young that he doesn't remember yet and how they were all sent away from their home planet as prayers for a better future. 😭😭😭

where you were carved out of the earth, safe and sound in your second birth, gravity has tied your anchor to the shore, as a lighthouse tames the endless ocean roar.

against the calming light, our silhouettes are changing shape. the stories you’ve been told have made you brave.

Ooooh, love that second birth imagery which also fits with Michael and the pod squad being "born" with no memories from the pods, and how Michael may want to leave the planet but he is tied here by his love for Alex. The "silhouettes changing shape" is a lovely call back to Silhouttes and I love "the stories you've been told have made you brave". It makes me think of Michael realizing his mom didn't abandon him by choice, and Sanders looked after as best he could when they system wouldn't let him actually adopt Michael and how that all leads to his confidence in the finale that things are going to work out with Alex. Just knowing that he's been loved all along, and accepting that has helped turn the tides for him and I'm very excited to see his journey in season 3. Can we pleeeeeassse get some genius, science!Michael this season? And get Alex drooling over it? It's what we all deserve.

such inheritance was formed within the sand, like the shells you gather in the safety of your hands.

dive in, with your eyes closed, for the life you were born to claim. the water will be paralyzed by the courage you contain. the flutter of your earnest heart, it will fill the silent seas and all will be restored in your melody.

I love the confidence in this last bit about claiming ones inheritance and bending the will of even the oceans with courage but also the softer imagery not of domination, but an earnest heart, and silent seas being restored with life. It's so lovely and really fitting for Michael who has never wanted to control and dominate anything but wanted to go to school and study, who I feel like we are going to see takes after his mother and her ability with plants and bringing life. Oh man, as nervous as I am for season 3, I do get bursts of excitement about it, and this is one of those times. My body is ready to see Michael's journey!

youtube

#my sweet nonnie friends #sleeping at last anon #roswell nm #michael guerin #sleeping at last #watermark #a perfect song for the dreamy rainy evening i'm having #now i just gotta get by behind in gear so i can finish up my fic and we can talk about next to me!

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kpophours · 5 years

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a very necessary guide to SF9

so. let’s talk about these underrated kings. be prepared for rambling. I just love them too much. my favorite boys, 10/10 would recommend stanning them.

some basic information

9 members (5 vocals, 4 rappers, 9 dancers and 9 visuals just stating the facts)

SF9 stands for Sensational Feeling 9

debuted on October 5, 2016 with Fanfare (still a BOP)

currently under FNC Entertainment and actually their first male dance group

their official fandom name is Fantasy (such a good name, honestly) and the official color is Fantasia Hologram (aka the p r e t t i e s t).

debuted after winning a survival show called Dance or Band (they participated as the dance team; the band team debuted as Honeyst in 2017)

7 mini albums so far with RPM being their latest comeback

... now onto the members (buckle up)!

Youngbin

Kim Youngbin, born on November 23, 1993

LeaderBin aka the Dad™

very charismatic, be prepared for some really intense eye contact (two words: stage presence)

rapper (highest rapping voice out of the four of them)

D A N C E R (a former 1MILLION dance studio trainee), so he‘s obviously 1/3 of sf9′s extremely talented dance line

also 1/3 of hyung line

cutest eye-smile (so soft) + cutest giggle™

rocked his red hair and looks amazing with slightly curled hair (do not fight me on this)

is tattooed (very p r e t t y)

threatens everyone’s bias at least once

gives amazing (and unnecessary long) pep talks together with Jaeyoon (just let the other boys sleep, please)

gazes so, so fondly at all his members in pretty much every video (no, I will NOT cry)

Jaeyoon is his roommate and secret wife.

Inseong

Kim Inseong, born on July 12, 1993

the oldest (not mentally) aka the Grandpa™

main vocal (those HIGH NOTES, damn). extremely steady voice.

unique beauty. looks a bit like a desert fox (according to himself and everyone with a pair of functioning eyes).

1/3 of extra line (see and hear three loud idiots in all their videos? yep, that’s him ft. Jaeyoon and Dawon)

also 2/3 of hyung line

v e r y intelligent and educated (holds a degree in Journalism and Communication) but also stupid

owner of an extremely cute smile

t h i g h s i am not weak or biased at all

SF9’s designated English speaker (used to live in London for a year)

amazing winking-ability, 10/10 will leave you weak-kneed

King of Lies. he’ll probably never pass a lie detector test. but it’s okay we still love him.

is left-handed and really good at drawing

married to Jaeyoon (it‘s complicated).

Jaeyoon

Lee Jaeyoon, born on August 9, 1994

3/3 of hyung line

honey voice (aka OST King)

d i m p l e s.

blindingly white teeth. the most beautiful smile (canines!).

very proud of his hips and butt (as he should be).

his actual name is Ethan

likes to work out and is f i t (he ended all Fantasies during rpm promotions, so thanks for that)

King of girl group dances and in charge of sexy (Zumba) dances

a fuc ki ng tease (again, rip all Fantasies during the UNIXERSE rpm stage)

2/3 of extra line (shares one brain cell with Inseong and Dawon. they don’t use it very often.)

had a pink undercut during the Mamma Mia era and probably made people cry with his outstanding beauty. again, i’m not biased at all

seems a bit shy and quiet at first. don’t be fooled. he is loud and will come for you.

married to both Inseong and Youngbin.

Dawon

Lee Sanghyuk, born on July 24, 1995

oh boy... such a bundle of utter chaos.

e x t r a (3/3 of extra line and probably their President™)

hear something loud and annoying in the background? it’s probably (most definitely) Dawon (helped by the other 2/3 of extra line)

a unique and beautiful voice (he needs more lines or else I’ll throw hands) - rapping, singing, screaming, he can do it all.

a fucking tease 2.0 (seriously, he and Jaeyoon need to be stopped)

Bruce Lee impressions on point

has tattoos

such a meme-face but also so handsome, like H O W

looks amazing and so soft with curly hair must protect

had so many different hair styles during their Mamma Mia promotions, rip his hair (and rip to all new Fantasies trying to keep track lol)

actually very soft. cried when Inseong surprised them during their UNIXERSE concert (which our Grandpa couldn’t participate in due to an injury)

likes to bully Taeyang.

Zuho

Baek Juho, born on July 4, 1996

Mr. Deep Ass Voice™

“my nose is my swag“

such a good dancer, definitely underappreciated.

looks intimidating at first, but is actually the softest (d u a l i t y)

the best cat dad (Huru has yet to accept his undying love for him though)

composes/produces own songs (@FNC: please, I’m b e g g i n g you to finally put Champagne on an album) and writes lyrics for a lot of sf9′s songs

didn‘t participate in most of their Enough promotions due to his (still ongoing) back problems (#FNCletZuhoRestChallenge2019)

a dork and meme and honestly just so, so cute and lovable

social butterfly (seriously, he‘s friends with literally e v e r y idol out there)

composed a (love) letter to Fantasy while driving a car with Hwiyoung, Taeyang and Dawon sleeping in the passenger and backseat yes I cried

a scaredy cat (ran away and left his members behind when he got scared by a staff member during their Trip with Fantasy)

Rowoon

Kim Seokwoo, born on August 7, 1996

yes he‘s a Tree™. is made up of 90% unnecessary long legs.

main vocal 2.0

1/2 of actor line

very handsome, I know (but he‘s so much more than just his good looks)

a devoted mom of 8

loves all Chanis and not-Chanis equally

almost had a mental breakdown because he managed to hit Chani’s face with a football which resulted in his precious maknae getting a nosebleed

always hugging and kissing and generally just smothering all members with his endless love and affection (especially Chani)

(t) h o t and knows it (very shy with fanboys though)

has literally only one selfie angle he uses rigorously

his One True Talent™ is staring sexily into the camera and doing nothing else because yes, he’s just that handsome

tries to be funny and fails most of the time, but he‘s cute so it’s okay.

Taeyang

Yoo Taeyang, born on February 28, 1997

undercover main vocal (has almost as many lines as Inseong and Rowoon)

best dancer, period. his entire body is probably made out of water. such. fluid. moves. - 2/3 of dance line, often in charge of choreographies.

also 1/3 of maknae line

speaks in ᵀᴵᴺʸ ᶠᴼᴺᵀ

the literal Sun™, his smile has healing properties.

has great hair and pushes it back a lot during his dance moves

a flower boy (literally. wanted to become a florist before debuting as an idol)

looks a bit like Lee Dongwook aka The Reaper from Goblin

you think he‘s soft? uh, sure, yeah. but is also s a v a g e (the personification of that then perish meme)

has a... unique way of drying his hair (ask Dawon, he‘ll show you. even if you don’t want him to, Dawon will show you)

gets bullied by Dawon. bullies him back. very spot-on impressions of Mr. Extraness (as seen on their Weekly Idol episode)

soulmates and married to Hwiyoung, I don’t make the rules.

Hwiyoung

Kim Youngkyun, born May 11, 1999

rapper and Mr. Charismatic™

yes he is that guy from their Now or Never mv

looks bad-ass but is a certified baby boy (2/3 of maknae line)

cute without trying and is actually a cat

has literally the best gummy smile which he used to hide behind his hands (but his hyungs encouraged him so much and now he smiles openly, I am not crying, you are)

grew up so suddenly and had long hair out of nowhere and left everyone sh o ok (should definitely be in a shampoo commercial)

composes songs. put one on SoundCloud just very recently. writes lyrics for a lot of sf9′s songs.

cried during their survival show when he got scolded for continuing to mess up the choreography and had to be hugged by Youngbin (who really is the best dad™)

King of the Cleopatra game thanks to his dolphin screams should probably be part of vocal line

pretended to not recognize his soulmate and roommate aka Taeyang when he had to guess his members from their hands while wearing a blindfold. Taeyang will probably never recover from this betrayal and is most definitely still whining about it.

Chani

Kang Chanhee, born on January 17, 2000

deep ass voice 2.0

d a n c e r (his little solo dance in Now or Never will forever be superior), 3/3 of dance line

Evil Maknae™ (3/3 of maknae line)

2/2 of actor line (yes he‘s that boy from Sky Castle)

speaks fluent duck

Taemin‘s Nº fanboy (literally knows his blood type, like... wow okay)

can‘t remember any of the members birthdays (he actually thought Youngbin was born in August when his birthday is literally in the middle of Winter. Leaderbin was hurt).

always looks like a smol bean, but everyone else is just ridiculously tall

had bright orange hair once only for about one second though lol

constantly smothered with love and hugs from Rowoon and pretends to hates it

has all his hyungs wrapped around his finger and knows it (they‘re all whipped for him, especially when he’s doing aegyo)

has a lot of hair aka (my favorite) coconut head (#freehisforehead2019)

looks expressionless and tired 24/7 (a whole mood and true gen z)

some videos to watch

all of their mv’s of course

literally every comeback stage

the suit versions of Now or Never and RPM

the ghost prank/horror version of Now or Never (I cried laughing)

this really cute Dingo Music version of Enough

basically all their dance practices, but especially K.O. (we all know they should have gone viral with that choreography)

their adorable pajama version of Different

them performing RPM on a treadmill (Chani is a mood™ and Inseong’s grandpa waddle is so cute)

these stunning acoustic versions of their songs brought to you by 2/3 of extra line + The Tree™

their kcon New York 2019 performance (+ their cover of Love Shot)

their reality show Trip with Fantasy

them dancing to O Sole Mio ft. Ostriches

their episodes on Weekly Idol and Idol Room

their girl group cover dance battle on Weekly Idol (ft. Cross Gene)

Rowoon and Inseong on Masked Singer

Dawon on Weekly Idol as part of the Masked Idol segment

the Now or Never choreography ft. dance line and the 1MILLION dance crew

them covering BTS’ Boy in Luv + EXO’s Call Me Baby

the Idol Dance Cover Challenge of Love Shot (ft. Astro, The Boyz and CIX)

this interview (I mean, that title alone... lol)

those are just a few of my favorite videos - there’s so much more content out there, so you’ll definitely never starve, lol.

I could literally ramble on about these nine incredible men for hours on end.

But this will be the end of my guide (it’s long enough already, lol).

Stan SF9 for (clear skin and good grades) nine hard-working and so, so talented individuals with amazing voices, incredible dance moves, outstanding visuals, chaotic energies and a lot of meme-worthiness.

You won’t regret it, I promise.

(Don’t worry, Rowoon(’s face) is okay).

[masterlist] | [requests]

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ezzydean · 5 years

Text

Full Moon Facade (1)

@notsuchasecret and I decided to do this bingo challenge. We sent each other 5 ships to try and check off as many boxes as possible.

Ship 1: WataUshi

Bingo Challenge boxes: Werewolves & Vampires, Zombies (partially checks off Major Character Death and Angst)

Warnings for some language, some violence, and an offscreen major character death (not part of the pairing)

This is just under 5k long friends. Enjoy!

Shinji drops into the chair with a, well, not quite a sigh but a noise close enough to one that it makes his uncle look up from his spot across the desk.

“It’s not an ideal situation,” his uncle says. Shinji snorts. “I know. Understatement.” His uncle slides over a stack of papers. “You can read through the whole thing if you want.”

Shinji waves the papers away. “I already did. Yesterday while you were out. My self-preservation instincts were kicking in,” he adds when his uncle shoots him a glare. His uncle’s office is technically off limits when he isn’t there but Shinji has been weaseling his way out of trouble pretty much his entire life. Usually all it takes is one of Shinji’s smiles and a little bit of puppy dog eye action. “I knew something was up and figured since everyone refused to talk to me it had to be about me.”

“Then you know that it isn’t any sort of punishment or anything like that. It’s a very important task. We need to keep an eye on those… creatures.”

Shinji hums noncommittally. He’s heard plenty over the years about the creatures in question. Vampires, as they all know, are Bad News. They Complicate Things. They are Bad Company and Lots of Trouble. They should be avoided because of Reasons.

Shinji figures that it’s all bullshit. To a certain degree anyway. Any stranger has the potential to be a life ruiner of epic proportions after all; vampire or not. It’s just an outdated view on life if you ask him. Which no one in his family does. Because he’s just a pup in their eyes.

“So I’m to be married off in my prime.”

“An important part-”

“A bargaining chip,” Shinji interrupts irritatedly. “Call me what I am in this.” His uncle sighs and shakes his head sadly. Most likely thinking of all the ways Shinji could ruin this with his smart mouth. And none of the ways that this was delaying all of Shinji’s plans for the future. Because he didn’t=t really care about Shinji’s plans for the future. None of the elders really did. He was too forward thinking and didn’t respect traditions apparently.

“An important part in the ongoing peace between them and us,” his uncle finishes.

If they always insist on it being ‘them and us’ things can never get better. Shinji knows this. His sister knows this. His entire generation knows this. But try telling that to their parents and uncles and aunts. It’s exhausting. He knows. He’s tried. He’s tried for years.

—

Shinji doesn’t have to straighten his shoulders or stand tall when the Ushijima family stride into the room; he’s already standing perfectly respectably next to his uncle. He may have all the manners of a family mongrel in private but he can play polite with the best of them when he needs to. He nods his head and bows politely when he’s introduced and settles into his spot at his uncle’s side while his uncle and the head of the Ushijima family talk. He meets the eye of his soon to be fiance and takes a practiced deep breath. The man is a vampire, no doubt. That somehow always familiar smell of a dusty old mansion deep in the forest clings to the man, like all vampires in these parts. The man blinks slowly and shifts his shoulders a little.

At his uncle’s gesture Shinji and the vampire head for the couch off to the side of the room. It’s as the vampire is settling onto the couch that Shinji realizes how much larger than him the vampire is. He’s broader and about a head taller and Shinji doesn’t even want to imagine how much heavier he is. Shinji has actually known more than his fair share of vampires but the ones he knows are more along the line of the stereotypical willowy and ethereally beautiful kind of vampire. Nothing like this solid block of man moving to sit on the couch.

“My name is Wakatoshi,” the vampire says when Shinji finally settles next to him. “In case you haven’t been told yet.”

“Shinji.”

Wakatoshi gives him a polite nod. “It is a pleasure to meet you Shinji.”

They sit a respectable distance apart on the couch, backs straight and attention on their elders on the other side of the room. As they should. Good little pawns, the both of them.

But for all that he might be a pawn in his uncle’s game Shinji knows that he is far more than that on his own board. He lets his gaze slip to the side and sees that Wakatoshi is already looking back at him with a carefully hidden calculating shine in his eyes. Maybe, he hopes, he can be more than a pawn on Wakatoshi’s board as well.

—

The morning is calm and still as they stand at the altar. They’re deep in the Watari family forest, deeper than any path will lead a casual hiker, and Shinji breathes easier than he has for a long time. The family forest is a sacred thing, far older than the Watari family, and he respects the things that make the trees their homes this deep into the forest. He hears a chittering in a nearby tree and smiles to himself; the things in the forest respect him too. He’s not sure if any of the others in his family have taken any more time than necessary this far in. But it’s one of his favorite places to be.

He watches as a pair of shaggy wolves, guardians of the deep, guide the vampires to the altar. It’s just a small patch of sunny ground with a stone smoothed by the ages in the middle, barely large enough for those present to stand in, but the moment the vampires cross into the light he can feel the forest’s magic buzz to life. Wakatoshi barely flinches at the sunlight, which Shinji finds interesting since most of the vampires he’s met are more like Wakatoshi’s aunt who twitches unhappily at the filtered light but stands resolutely at her nephew’s side.

“Alright,” Shinji’s uncle says. His voice is soft in respect to their surroundings but it carries easily to those present, even the humans with their less sensitive hearing. “We all know why we’re here. At the request of both parties-” his uncle nods once to Shinji and then at Wakatoshi - “we will be rid of the flowery words of endless devotion that usually accompanies this sort of thing.” Shinji gives his uncle a grateful smile in return. He and Wakatoshi had talked about it - during one of the many times they had been left to their own devices while the heads of their families discussed other matters - but he hadn’t been entirely sure his uncle would go for it. Traditions were traditions for a reason, or so Shinji has always been told.

His uncles gestures to the altar and Shigeru steps forward. As the human member closest to Shinji he has the honorable duty of being Shinji’s witness and guide for the ceremony. His conscience and his shield in the days to come. He shakes out his fluffy hair and takes the crown of berries and flowers that one of the wolves presents to him.

“Shigeru,” his uncle says. “Do you understand your role today and in the coming days?”

“Yes,” Shigeru answers. He meets Shinji’s eyes and winks at him when his uncles looks away towards the vampires. Shinji just shakes his head and rolls his eyes at his best friend.

A man with a shock of red hair saunters forward at his uncle’s gesture.

“Satori,” his uncle says. “Do you understand your role today and in the coming days?”

“Yes.” Satori takes the crown he’s presented with as well.

As one he and Shigeru walk away from the altar. Satori makes his way to Shinji and Shigeru heads for Wakatoshi. He and Wakatoshi bow so the other two can place the crowns on their heads then they straighten and let the other two men guide them to the altar. It’s a show of trust, to have the member of the family that is closest to Shinji now at Wakatoshi’s side, and vice versa. Though you’d have to be downright stupid to try to pull anything with two of the most powerful members of the opposing family standing mere steps away. But he figures that ages ago people were stupid and desperate enough to try anything. Again. Tradition. Sometimes he feels they rely too much on tradition and the old ways and the rules that have governed their family for centuries.

But he’s not the head of the family, not yet. His uncle is.

His uncle smiles and for a brief moment Shinji swears he sees something eerie flash through his uncle’s eyes, something full of promise of retribution like maybe he had heard Shinji’s thoughts. Then his uncle blinks and says, “Let us begin,” and it’s gone.

His uncle speaks kind words, words not of love but of honor and promises. Words not of mindless devotion but of mindful decision and duty.

He wonders what the Ushijima vampires think of this all. If they have ceremonies that wind on forever and traditions that make a single meeting take days.

A silence falls over them. The tiny patch of light has moved from morning’s coolness into midday’s harsh heat. He relaxes as he lets the magic of the forest into his soul.

Vines sprout from the ground at his and Wakatoshi’s feet, twisting and looping in on themselves until they reach their hands and tendrils slide across their skin. Shinji watches the vine wrap around his wrist and then snake up to wind around his middle finger. There are no rings. This is a Watari ceremony, a tradition from before precious metals were yanked from the rocks and shaped into jewelry. They will wear their promise to each other forever, not with rings so easily lost or forgotten, but on their skin like so many before them. He tries not to brace for the burn he knows is coming and instead looks up to see how Wakatoshi is doing. Only to find Wakatoshi already looking at him.

The burn comes as the forest’s magic leaves it’s mark on him but he barely notices it, too busy watching Wakatoshi’s eyes flare brightly as the ritual completes and they are bound together.

—

They’re on the Ushijima family compound, tucked into an alcove on one of the many glass encased pathways that spread through the sprawling complex. The paths are spread out and designed so that anything outside is basically part of one giant courtyard with flowers and vegetation artfully pressing against the glass and marble.

Wakatoshi is listening to one of Shinji’s lively debates with Satori - today’s topic is zombies, yesterday’s was the numerous discrepancies about werewolves in romance novels, and tomorrow’s will no doubt be all the ways that modern media incorrectly portrays ninjas or something along those lines - and he can’t help but glance over and share an exasperated look with Shigeru. He would wonder how the human has managed to put up with Shinji’s antics for so long. But his closest friend is Satori so he’s not exactly in any place to judge.

“What if a zombie ate a vampire brain?” Shinji asks. “Would you get a zombie vampire? Is that possible? Can you make an undead zombie less undead by vampiring them up?”

“Vampiring them up? What are you on? What is wrong with you?” Satori gives Wakatoshi a sympathetic look. “Wakatoshi you got bound to a dumbass. Who says weird shit.” Wakatoshi merely shrugs. He’s starting to think that he couldn’t have wound up bound to a better match for him even if he had chosen for himself. Shinji’s wild ideas balance out his own muted thoughts while his calm manner helps to keep Shinji’s instincts from overwhelming him.

“Okay,” Shinji says, moving away from Wakatoshi’s side where he’s been casually pressed for the last twenty minutes so he can lean forward towards where Satori is slouched on the floor next to them. “But aren’t vampires just like…”

His voice drops off long enough for Shigeru to groan quietly and mutter, “Oh Shinji.”

“Like high functioning zombies or something? Like high functioning, I dunno, vegetarian zombies maybe?” Shinji blinks and looks up at where Shigeru is leaning against the side of the arch they’re all tucked under. “Is blood acceptable for vegetarians?”

Satori sputters, for once at a loss for words, and eventually settles for staring at Shinji with his mouth parted slightly.

“On behalf of all vampires, anywhere and ever, I am offended right now,” Wakatoshi finally says when he realizes Satori is well and truly shocked into silence.

Shinji sucks in a sharp breath and turns to him. It only takes him a moment to realize that Wakatoshi wasn’t serious but for that moment he looks truly remorseful. He smacks Wakatoshi’s arm when he sees the smile trying to twitch onto his lips.

“And here I was worried.” Shinji huffs. “Anyway. Back to zombies eating vampire brains. What would happen?”

“I don’t know,” Wakatoshi answers truthfully. “But I have a question.”

Shinji’s eyes light up. Wakatoshi rarely takes part in his and Satori’s debates. Their ideas just get wilder and weirder each time and even Shigeru has steered clear of them for the most part.

“Go for it.” Shinji leans back in towards Wakatoshi eagerly.

“What if,” he says slowly, thoughtfully, “I let Satori shave you on a full moon like he keeps asking to?” It’s Shinji’s turn to sputter wordlessly. “Do you come back with a bald patch? You aren’t particularly hairy in your human form after all.” He has to raise his voice just a little to be heard over Shigeru’s sudden fit of laughter and Satori’s cackling.

Shinji tries to keep a straight face but before long he breaks into laughter too.

“I will never be ready for you to get all sassy like that,” Shinji admits through his laughter.

“No one is ever ready for sassy Wakatoshi,” Satori says. He’s fallen flat on the floor in his laughter and his eyes sparkle with mirth.

Shigeru’s still chuckling, loose limbed and relaxed, when the glass walls around them shatter.

Wailing alarms fill the air and it takes them all a moment to realize the sound is coming from outside. It sounds like every alarm in the area is blaring at the same time and Shinji covers his ears with a whine, curling into Wakatoshi’s side. It only takes them a few minutes - long enough for Shinji’s sensitive ears to get used to the alarms and start to be able to hear beyond them - for them to venture out of the shelter of the paths and discover that the world had gone to shit.

—

The door slams shut behind them, echoing through the building.

“Holy. Fucking. Hell.”

Wakatoshi leans against the wall next Shinji and lets out a slow breath.

“Somehow,” he says as softly as he can, “that feels like an understatement.” Despite his attempts at quiet his voice carries. The building used to be the library. Now it is a home base of sorts.

Satori peeks his head out from an aisle - Teen New Romance - and grins when he spots them.

“Look what the bat dragged in.” The sarcasm in Satori’s tone is thick enough that even Wakatoshi recognizes it without issue.

Satori,” he warns.

“No. It’s fine.” Shinji waves off his warning. “Let him say what he wants to say.”

“I’m not sure that’s a good idea,” Wakatoshi murmurs. But clearly the other two aren’t listening.

He hears Satori snipe something about apocalypses at Shinji and Shinji growls something back about entitled assholes and he can feel a headache coming on as he leaves them at the front of the library and wanders away towards the Children’s section. Which is ironic because he is pretty sure he just left the children behind.

Wakatoshi sighs and makes his way into their makeshift barracks. Kentarou glances up and nods in acknowledgment but doesn’t bother getting up from where he’s sitting on the floor with Daichi and Hajime using him for a pillow.

Daichi rolls his head just enough to meet his eyes without moving from his pillow. “Zombies. Like. What the hell? Right?”

Wakatoshi huffs and just like that things are already better. Just having his people, his clan, here, even if Satori is still arguing with Shinji out in the main lobby of the library, settles him.

—

He’s never given much thought to things like the apocalypse. But if he had he’s pretty sure that he never would have pictured his family having a starring role as the cause of it. Oh, sure, years from now they might only be seen as a footnote, a mere side effect, just one of many causes. But right now, with zombies shuffling and shuddering and twitching around through the streets, the only place that he can see to lay the blame is squarely on his uncle’s head.

Which sucks. Because Shinji really really likes his uncle. Liked? Is it wrong to still like his uncle even though his uncle is the reason he’s currently running for his life? Is his uncle even still alive to see the chaos he let loose?

A cracking noise fills the air around him and Shinji looks up just in time to avoid getting smushed by a tree crashing to the ground. He leaps over the splintered trunk and takes a sharp left, darting up into the crown of the tree, leaving nothing but a scattering of leaves in his wake. He knows trees, he knows forests. Even if it wasn’t his family’s land - which, thankfully, it is - he is still safer and more at home among the trees than deep in the mess of what the city has become. For one thing, it’s much harder for the zombies to crowd him, to gang up on him and trap him in an alleyway or against a building. He’s already seen two cousins and a slew of humans he’s never met before taken out like that. Sure a werewolf is much faster than a zombie but anyone can easily lose when outnumbered by a dozen or more.

It’s only been a few weeks since the day the world exploded around them, literally, and Shinji’s not sure it will ever be the same again. And all for what? That’s what he wants to know. That’s what keeps driving him right now. All he knows for sure is that it has something to do with his family, his uncle. The sheer number of zombies and weird creatures scuttling around his uncle’s home on their family land is proof enough of that. But doesn’t give him an inkling as to why.

A sharp bark comes from a little further into the forest and he hurries towards it, eyes searching for Shigeru.

“Are we sure about this?” Shinji asks as he climbs up onto the branch next to his best friend.

“About as sure as we can be.” Shigeru’s eyes flash with anger as he looks towards the break in the trees. Shinji knows that Shigeru can’t see his uncle’s house from here, he can barely see it with his enhanced vision, but that doesn’t stop Shigeru from letting out an angry little growl.

Shinji takes a deep breath, sorting through the familiar scents of the Watari lands until he can find the scents he’s searching for. He pushes past the rot of the zombies and the staleness of the other creatures until he finds the one that makes his heart clench and ache: the mossy earth, hazelnut coffee smell of his uncle.

“He’s there,” Shinji growls. Shigeru tenses beside him, ready to leap down and follow his lead. “We’ll make him give us answers. One way or another.”

—

Sometimes… sometimes the answers aren’t worth the costs.

Sometimes promises shouldn’t have to be kept. Even the sturdiest shields are bound to break eventually.

—

Everyone processes grief in different ways. And they process it different for different people. The grief Wakatoshi had felt at the loss of his aunt thanks to her betrayal (and subsequently causing the apocalypse they are trying their best to survive through today) was nothing at all like the grief at seeing his father fall a few weeks later. He knows grief and he knows that even without this apocalypse he would be even more intimately acquainted with it long before his life was over, such was the price paid by his kind. Vampires hold their grief close - like they hold most of their emotions - and they are reluctant to let it go. Werewolves, he has quickly discovered, feel deeply and fast and they are not afraid to embrace every emotion that washes over them. They will let themselves drown in it if they aren’t stopped.

“They way they act you’d think they’re the only ones hurting.” Wakatoshi glances over at Satori’s words. His friend is tired. He can tell that even without the way the sound of weariness takes over every word. He is tired down to his very bones and Wakatoshi can’t blame him any.

He looks back across the library. Shinji is curling around Tobio, the youngest left in his pack, with Tooru, his new second-in-command, pressing against his back. It’s a sad sight to see, an even sadder one to hear as they whimper and whine and curl tighter around each other. There are more of them out there, outside the library. More vampires and humans and werewolves. But who knows when they’ll be able to find them and if they will manage to find anyone they actually know. The Ushijima family and the Watari family are two of the biggest clans of their respective species but with the way things were going outside that really doesn’t mean anything anymore.

“They don’t think that way.” He reaches out and settles his hand on Satori’s shoulder and his friend collapses into his side with an exhausted sigh. “Grief is different for us all. And it is never easy for any of us. Vampire or werewolf or human.” Shinji’s eyes flicker towards them and he can see the tenseness in Shinji’s muscles. Like he’s one blink away from attacking something. Or someone. Wakatoshi settles Satori a little closer against his side and stares back. Shinji may be his pack’s leader now but Wakatoshi is a leader as well and Satori is his to protect, not that the human likes to admit it much, and he will protect Satori with his life even from the man he is bonded to. “Also. Shinji just lost his best friend. Shigeru has - had,” he corrects himself and it hurts to do so. He had only met Shigeru a handful of times but he liked the man. He had been a good balance to Shinji’s calmness and playfulness. “Shigeru had been with Shinji since Shinji was born. He was barely a month older.”

Satori lets out a sound that is almost a growl as he curls more comfortably into Wakatoshi’s side. Maybe he’s thinking about his own close friends, lost not long after this whole thing started. Maybe he’s thinking about losing someone now. Maybe, and this is probably too much to ask for at the moment, he’s thinking about losing one of the people on the other side of the library.

One day they’ll have to all play nice with each other. One day Wakatoshi will have to do his best to make sure they all cooperate, human and vampire and werewolf alike.

But not today. Today is a day to lick wounds and patch up broken hearts. The sky outside is nearly as gray as the mood inside and he is quite sure that it is only the fact that he and Shinji aren’t at each other’s throats that is keeping the peace amongst the others.

—

“Zombies.” Shinji spits out the word like he’s just taken a bit of a rotten fruit. “Fucking zombies.”

“When our families set out to do something, they do it well.” Wakatoshi stares out the window at the almost abandoned streets below them. He catches the scowl of Shinji’s reflection and sighs. They need to talk about this eventually. Now is as a good a time as any he supposes.

“Yeah, well, the Watari family has never been one to half-ass anything. Not when you can cause all out panic and mass destruction of the world as we know it.”

“Yes. The Ushijima family has never been content to stand idly by. Always searching out the strongest team to be on and all that.”

The news that Wakatoshi’s aunt had been in collusion with Shinji’s uncle hadn’t been all that surprising. There had always been something a little odd about his aunt. Not enough to really warn him but enough that looking back he can see it. No, the shock had been when Shinji had told him, voice still numb with the loss of his best friend, that the whole ‘end of the world destruction of all living things’ had been the plan all along. And getting Shinji and Wakatoshi to agree to and take part in the bonding that tied their families together was one of the final steps. Something about the magic of the Watari forest being combined with the Ushijima family’s curse being the key to unlock the door of war and ruin.

Shinji drags his hands down his face and slumps forward, face pressed against the glass and breath fogging it as he speaks. “What the hell do we do now?”

Wakatoshi slips his hand into his pocket and digs out the rings that he’s kept safe, rings Shinji never knew about. The Watari family may have been cradled in their forest’s bosom from birth. They may have had rituals from time before tools and technology. But the Ushijima family had their own traditions as well. They were forged from blood and fire and passion. ��They sealed their rituals, their bonds, with precious metals shaped with their own hands.

“Do you know why bonds and the like with my family have always been so hard to come by?” Shinji shakes his head morosely but he finally pulls away from the glass and gives Wakatoshi a curious look. It’s an improvement from the numbness and anger that have been crossing his features for days. “Because each one is sealed with jewelry or a memento that is literally made by the hands of those who are offering the bond or promise. For each promise we intend to keep, each bond we intend to make, we are willing to put our sweat and blood into the deal. We have since the beginning and we will until the very end.”

He opens his hand and holds it out to Shinji. Shinji’s heart beats wildly in his chest - Wakatoshi has been able to hear it as clear as day since they made their pact, their bond - but his hand is steady as he reaches over and plucks his ring from Wakatoshi’s palm.

“I made these with the intention that even if we were to never be deeply in love with each other I would stand by your side no matter the cause, no matter the situation. That I may not be in love with you but I would be devoted to you. Not mindlessly enthralled but mindfully chosen.”

Shinji stares at him and Wakatoshi can’t blame him. He’s not one for wordy speeches or sharing his emotions quite so freely. But to get where he can see they need to be, where they need to go from here, he is willing to open himself up to the possibility of being so intimately known by his partner.

“So,” he continues. “What do we do? We go back down and face them as a united front. It’s time we truly lead them together. Not just two factions aiming to survive.” He slides his ring onto his middle finger, pleased to see that it fits perfectly into the patch of skin at the base of his finger left bare from the Watari brand of promise on his skin.

Shinji looks down at his own hand, stares at the brand on his skin like he’s seeing it for the first time. He finally slips his ring onto his finger and gasps in surprise when the Ushijima family’s cursed magic flares to life between them. The ring on Wakatoshi’s finger is warm with energy and he smiles when Shinji reaches out and takes his hand.

“We’re not bargaining chips anymore,” Shinji says, voice filled with determination. “We’re not pawns on someone else’s board. Every decision we make from here, every path we choose to follow. It’s ours.” He squeezes Wakatoshi’s hand. “Together.”

#haikyuu #WataUshi #watari shinji #ushijima wakatoshi #WataUshi fic #hq writing #bre and ezzy's bingo challenge

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givemewinterpls · 5 years

Text

Abuse & Pregnancy

This post will be long and emotional; Tumblr is the only place I feel comfortable posting things like this.

I posted things on here all throughout my first pregnancy, aka my first relationship. They weren't good things. They all still exist on here. I was excited, I was in love with the baby inside of me, but everything around me was killing me.

I had moved to Alaska and finally felt I was where I belong. Alaska is my home, it always will be.

I met a man who manipulated me at 18 years old. He was suicidal, threatened it constantly, and told me if we didn't leave Alaska together he would commit suicide. I felt somewhat the same about going back to Texas, my home state, but I kept quiet and I put his wants before my own. We moved in with my mother in Texas. Again, I felt out of place and homesick. He insisted I have his baby or he would kill himself; that this baby and I would be the thing that made life worth living. I was 18, confused, socially awkward, depressed never had a job in my life; I just wanted to travel and wander. I wasn't ready, but I let it happen.

9 months. 9 months of getting called endless names. Idiot, stupid, he called me a hippie but spoke it the same way he called me, "idiot." He didn't like who I was. He made fun of who I was, yet told me I was his only reason to live and without me he would kill himself. I worked nights and would get home at 7 AM, hormones completely knocking me out the second I sat down, and he would get angry at me for being so tired. My eyes sometimes would simply not be able to stay open, and he would sit by me and continue to make sure I stayed awake until he said I could go to sleep. He expected his lunch to be made, for me to bring him fast food or coffee at work sometimes. I never got a back rub. I never got sympathy. I never had a break. I didn't have the sweet, loving sex that I know now exists while the two of you know you are creating this life together, making everything even more intimate. At 6 months, I caught him cheating on dating websites, sending disgusting messages to other girls. Yet, I wasn't allowed to even see my best friend of 10 years who is gay, all because he is a man. He made me call him on every break, every lunch, to make sure I wasn't talking to guys, all while telling girls online that he wanted to tie them up.

He deemed himself a devoted Christian, and though I told him multiple times I simply was not interested and had different beliefs, he guilted me into going to church with him. He talked to me like I was a child, a complete moron, for not believing the things they taught. Like it wasn't that I didn't believe, it must be that I was just too stupid and ignorant to understand. He insisted that my unborn son, though never showing any kind of care or excitement otherwise, would without question be taught his religion, get baptized, and not believe in Santa, no matter what I wanted. He was a walking, talking contradiction.

9 months of my self esteem and confidence being drained until it was pretty much all gone. The only thing that kept me going was my Kota inside of me; he couldn't drain me of the confidence that baby gave me, it was impossible.

The day I went into labor he was an hour away at a job orientation. I called him, telling him he needed to head to the hospital, and he was angry at me. For a while he said he couldn't leave, that he would lose this job opportunity. I'll never forget; I was getting my epidural, something that can be very detrimental if you accidentally move, while arguing with my boyfriend on the phone about him making it to the birth of his son. He showed up eventually, and after Kota was born would not stop complaining about not being able to leave the hospital for the default 2 or so days they keep you there.

He didn't help me with my son. He complained that I was on maternity leave and should have plenty of time to sleep and take care of the baby myself. When he was a few months old I saw bite marks on his leg; he had bit my son.

Eventually I saw my current boyfriend for the first time and I swear, everything inside of me knew he was my person. Without speaking a word to him for months I knew one day the universe would lead us to where we are now.

I imagined this life with him, with him and my son, and even if this never came true I still used the thought of a better life to finally break free. I broke up with him. For a month we went back and forth; he had no where else to live, he wouldn't stop threatening suicide, I told him about my feelings for another man, and finally one night I was drunk and told him the bottom line: I was not happy with him and never would be, this was over and I was only still with him out of pity and fear. I woke up a few hours later and he had shot himself in the head.

Two and a half years later, me and my best friend, my person, found out about a month and a half ago we're having another baby. He was been my son's father since he was 5 months old, and I believe he was always meant to be that. He loved him more in a few days than my ex did in the 5 months he was here.

Every time I thought about my first pregnancy, I couldn't help but break down. It hurt so much to know I was robbed of something that is supposed to be so special. I know many woman don't have the pregnancy they want, I'm not the only one, but I am sad for those woman, too. My heart hurts for them, too, no matter what their situation was. No woman deserves to be miserable while they are making their child. It's an experience that is absolutely like no other. Nothing can compare to feeling your baby move and grow inside of you. It's the most human I've ever felt, knowing I'm capable of such things. There was a pain inside of me knowing I missed out on something that I knew with my current partner would have been so, so special. It would have been beautiful. With our connection, our love, his sympathy and understanding of me. I knew if it had been him it would have been a beautiful 9 months. And every time I pictured that, I sobbed.

I am about 10/11 weeks pregnant and I can't even put into words how deeply, deeply happy I am. I get to do it over. I get to have the pregnancy I wanted. I hope it goes by very slowly. This will be my last pregnancy, and I want to experience all of it the right way. I don't have to be scared. I don't have to cry behind closed doors. I don't have to imagine some other life I could be having with someone else. I'm living that life right now.

Don't ever let a man ruin something for you. Don't let a man control you. Take every opportunity you can to get out, to get away, do not trap yourself like I did. I'm angry at myself every day for what I let him to do me; it feels like being angry at a completely different person, because that's who I was. I was not myself. The person I am today would never, ever let it happen. I let a man strip me of myself and change me. Please, do not ever make the same mistake. Find help. Tell someone. Do not stay quiet; you deserve so much more than a life you can't even live without imagining something different just to make it through the day. So much more than that.

But if you are in a similar situation, if anyone actually reads this far, I know one day you will find the courage to get out of it. You will. I promise you. I never thought I would, I thought my life was truly over. But I did what I thought was impossible, and I'm so proud of where I am today. I hate that a life was lost, but I did everything I could, believe me. I tried for so long to help this man. You cannot throw yourself, your wants, your needs, your happiness, away all for another person. You have to help yourself first. We don't have very long on this planet, and to waste years being absolutely miserable, even being suicidal yourself, all because you are putting so much of yourself, draining yourself, into trying to fix another person who never once has appreciated your efforts or your sacrifice; it's just tragic. It's wrong. Please, find the courage to live a better life. I promise you it's there. It's waiting for you.

#Trigger #Trigger warning #Pregnancy #Rant #Abuse #Hope #Text #Suicide trigger #toxic relationship #Pregnant #Personal

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mjwood93 · 4 years

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Rhythms of Grace: How the Church’s Worship Tells the Story of the Gospel by Mike Cosper

Rhythms of Grace: How the Church’s Worship Tells the Story of the Gospel by Mike Cosper.

"The Story of the Gospel is all about Worship” (p. 73)

“Do you find yourself in God’s Gospel story week to week? How is the Gospel important to worship?” These are just a couple of the questions that Mike Cosper seeks to answer in his book Rhythms of Grace. Mike Cosper is one of the founding pastors at Sojourn Community Church, where he serves as pastor over the worship and arts ministry. He also writes for The Gospel Coalition. While I’ve never heard of Mike Cosper until reading this book, I had listened to a couple songs from a Sojourn Music worship album because of their association with Sovereign Grace Music.

At 212 pages or so, I flew through this book in about a week, and am able to say that I’ll be recommending this book to other worship leaders and musicians. It is perfect for the layperson as well as a pastor/elder who may be in need of more study on Gospel-Centered Worship. This book has a little something for everyone, with the first part of the book almost being a short biblical theology of worship, then moving into a short chapter dealing with church history, and then moving on at last to how do we apply all this to today with changes in worship styles, technology, and other complications.

Chapters 1-4 give a short biblical theology of worship in the Bible. Biblical Theology is a discipline of theology that traces a theme chronologically in history as it appears in Scripture from Genesis to Revelation. Biblical Theology is a good discipline to show how a theme or doctrine develops throughout the Bible and is fulfilled and consummated in Jesus Christ. We start right at the beginning (well, actually before the beginning) before the foundation of the world with God in perfect Trinitarian love. At it’s heart, the worship of God by His own self adoration is perfect worship and love. In the book of Genesis, it is out of this overflowing love that Adam is created as the first “worship leader”. Eden was a garden temple where God was able to completely dwell in the presence of Adam & Eve. Adam & Eve’s worship was not ritualistic or endless singing, but it was their whole lives devoted to God. They were called to expand and subdue the rest of creation to the glory of God, but failed in their sin, and so perfect worship between God & man was ruined. Sin distorts the beauty and harmony that God created, and we see this in the contrasted worship of Cain and Abel and all down the line of humanity through when God calls Moses to lead the nation of Israel out of Egypt, where they sing a song of God redeeming them and giving them a new identity as His people. It is at Mount Sinai where the Priesthood and Tabernacle are established. Because God is a holy, perfect, and just God, He requires that life be taken as the punishment of sin, requiring atonement of sins through the sacrifice of birds, bulls, and lambs. As Adam represented humanity and creation, so the priesthood represents the people of Israel. Further in history these priests lead the people in false worship, and the people long for a King like other nations, who also end up representing the nation and leading the people astray. The story of the Old Testament is one of utter failure, with God continually calling the people of Israel back to repentance. The Song of Jesus is one that is built up throughout the Biblical story and leads to his quotation of Psalm 22 on the Cross, facing God’s wrath and fury for the sins of His people. His song is one of redemption and through His death and resurrection became the center where it is possible to approach God the Father through a reconciled relationship. This is why Jesus is the True Temple, our True Priest, and our True Worship Leader. He has won and has restored what sin has broken. By union with Him and by His extension, we are called as the Church to do His work, being a light unto the nations, singing His praise and glorifying Him with our lives as living sacrifices.

Chapter 5 was one of the most helpful chapters to read titled “Worship One, Two, Three”. Cosper’s philosophy of worship is one that I’ll continue to use in the days ahead. His philosophy is that worship has one Object & Author, two contexts, and three audiences.

The Trinitarian God is at the center of our worship. He created us to worship Him, and even though sin corrupted our worship of Him, He makes us new creation in Christ so that our lives are completely offered to Him by Christ’s righteousness, who also brings glory to the Father. God is the One who put forward and directed His own sovereign plan, so that He is the author of not only our faith, but our worship.

Two contexts exist for our worship, one that is scattered, the other that is gathered. Scattered worship is how each Christian individually is able to worship God in their own private and public lives. It is important to note that we can only have this intimate living sacrifice of worship because of what Christ has done on the Cross. The fact that we can worship God while driving in our car is a huge deal, one that we should be continually thankful for! We cannot sustain ourselves and our relationship with God individually though. We are called to be with community and this is where Gathered Worship takes place. Because Jesus is the Cornerstone of the true Temple and fulfills the OT temple and priesthood, we become the dwelling place of God, even more so when we unite and worship Him together. Therefore this makes our gathering on Sundays completely unique. Little temples are making a greater temple that are united to the True Temple. The goal of all this is to proclaim the Glory of God, and to spur and encourage one another on so that we can go out back into the world to proclaim the Gospel and His Kingdom.

Three audiences exist: God, the Church, and the World. God is our audience as we come to Him through His Son Jesus Christ. We can worship Him fully because of Jesus interceding for us at the right hand of the Father. The Church is the second audience. We are called to sing to one another in psalms, hymns, and spiritual songs, encouraging and teaching one another in this way. The last audience is the world. Through the Church’s song we are called to be a light and declare boldly through our singing the glory of Jesus Christ to the world. It is important to have a balance of audience direction from week to week. If not careful, a church could move to something more like a seeker-sensitive church, where the emphasis is on the audience of the world. “Worship that celebrates the gospel brings all three audiences together: the God who saves by the Gospel, the Church formed by the Gospel, and the world in need of the Gospel” (p.90).

Chapter 6 moves on to Worship as Spiritual Formation, mainly emphasizing why we gather as a Church and how we use the Word in worship to form our habits as worshippers going out into the world. Gathering itself is a habit that must discipline ourselves to do. Not only that, but how we gather, what we teach through our songs, and the language we use during this gathering all form our habits for how we express and articulate our worship. We need to make sure we are discerning and scriptural about all these things. Ultimately, our gathering is to encourage us in the Gospel and our hope-filled future of Christ returning and our uniting with Him.

Chapters 7 & 8 deal with Worship in the history of the church and liturgical aspects of worship. From the beginning of when the Church was created, the Gospel has always shaped it’s liturgy. Liturgy itself means “the work of the people”, and when the church gathers we have work to do. This means to Glorify God and to spur each other on to good works. But how we do these things, and how we view God and worship Him, is based on the content that we include in our services. “The words we hear, sing, and speak in worship help form our images of God,.... our understanding of what the church is and does,... and our practices of engaging with God, with each other, and with the world” (p.118). Everything we do in a service explicitly and implicitly teaches something. To help find ourselves in the story of the Gospel, we must frame our services by the Gospel. This includes the elements of:

Adoration

Confession

Assurance

Thanksgiving

Petition

Instruction

Charge

Blessing

or, can also be framed as:

God is Holy - Creation - Adoration

We are sinners - Fall - Confession/Lament

Jesus saves us - Redemption - Assurance/Thanksgiving/Instruction

Jesus sends us - Consummation - Communion/Charge/Blessing

From the early church, to the Reformation, to the Free Church, to age of Revivalism, all various church denominations have used these practices and framework to some degree when shaping their service. Much of the problem with a modern church service is that it is based on what’s called “The Temple Model” of a pilgrim traveling to Jerusalem. I include this next paragraph from Cosper’s book because I believe it is of importance, describing a large portion of churches today:

“The problem with this model is twofold. First, it’s developed backwards. The theology of the Temple Model is a theological interpretation of an experience, and it is divorced from any kind of historical perspective on the gathered church. Second, it ignores most of what the New Testament teaches us about worship, the presence of God, and the temple. instead of being led by Jesus through the inner curtain, we’re led there by a worship leader or a pastor - a pseudo priest. God’s presence is measured in emotional impact, and it’s mediated through music and preaching, displacing Jesus from his role as Mediator and worship leader” (p.113).

This type of worship can lead people astray, and into unknowingly thinking that they are just there to feed a spiritual/emotional high. Even in our worship, we should not look to ourselves, to a worship leader, to a pastor, but to Christ Himself to help us worship all the more.

Chapter 9 is all about singing. Singing is all throughout the Bible and usually has to deal with the redemption of God’s people. God sings over us and we as the people of God have sung to Him throughout the ages. We are to sing a “new song”. This does not mean a literal creative new song with some fancy new chord progression, but has to deal with the new song of Jesus Christ our Lord saving His people through the Gospel. Worship is so much more than an individual encounter with God, as much as the modern worship movement may make it seem, but it is about our song as the people of God to our God. As I have explained earlier in this review, singing should be about teaching one another, and we are told to do this through psalms, hymns, and spiritual songs. What we sing and how we sing are so important, because our song sung together is a testimony and declaration to the world about what we believe. This means singing and submitting to each other’s preferences as well, because, this shows love to one another, and continues to not hurt our witness to the world. Within all of this, the end goal of music should be to serve the congregation’s singing, in scriptural truth, but also in quality and other factors, such as a key that is suitable for them.

Chapter 10 places an emphasis on the role of a worship leader being a pastoral one. Those who lead are stewards of God’s Word, and should know it well. We as worship leaders place the thoughts and words used into people’s minds, mouths, and hearts. Worship leaders have the greatest opportunity to summarize doctrine and make the language of the Bible fresh and new to their congregation’s ears. We should make sure that what we sing should be rightly contextualized and understandable to our congregation. We should also be aware of who we have in our congregation, and what situations are arriving and have gone before us in the congregation, and should know the congregation’s needs and sufferings. This is an area where I personally need to grow in, so it was good for me to read.

I’ve read six books on worship this year, and this would probably take place at number three for favorite worship book that I’ve read; number two being Christ-Centered Worship by Bryan Chapell, number one being Worship Matters by Bob Kauflin (who also does the foreword for this book). I continue to learn and see that our theology shapes our doxology and vice versa, therefore one must be discerning with each, because they are of the utmost importance. Worship is what we were made for; to worship God through Jesus Christ, because of what he Has done on the Cross. He is our True Worship Leader, and may we ever look to and depend on His mercy and grace to help His name be glorified all the more. I thank God for Mike Cosper, his ministry and this much needed book.

#worship #mike cosper #music #gospel #the gospel #the gospel coalition #liturgy #christ #christian #book review

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musicmixtapes · 6 years

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October 10, 2018 Mix

Welcome to this week's installation of music! I loved finding tracks that blended well in terms of sound and meaning, as well as playing around with the pace of the pieces so not to cause monotony inside the eardrums. Enjoy and any suggestions/opinions, send my way

Spotify Playlist (Listen in order!) 1. Walls by The Lumineers - First off, can I just say how excited I am to see new music from a group who never seems to disappoint both my ears and my heart. While listening for the first time I thought, "Wow what a great song, but this sounds kind of familiar" so when I showed it to my mom she said "Of course it sounds familiar, it's a cover of one of Tom Petty's songs" and then it made my heart that much fuller knowing that. Petty is known to have the American writing way of describing through metaphor exactly how love and relationships feel at a moment suspended in time. Using that craftsmanship and words that cut to the bone, The Lumineers created a cover that is so folky and vulnerable sounding, I am sure that Petty would not be disappointed in it. 2. I've Just Seen A Face by The Beatles - Continuing with classics that we may find hidden in corners of our mind, that pop out into existence from time to time, is this wonderful treasure from the Help! album, a beloved album to me and most of the world, I'm sure. I specifically chose this track because the title definitely created a supernatural element in my mind that translated to the feeling that love often gives, which is that it transcends regular human volition. It causes this reaction that cannot be expressed through regular conversation and absolutely needed to be sung about, which to me, is fantastic. Also, the really fast and frantic pace of the song adds to the urgency of the message of seeing someone in passing and instantly feeling a surge of love and the need to be with them at the moment. Falling in love is sometimes done in a slow motion type fall, but in this instance, it seems more immediate. 3. Moon Barks At The Dog by Saintseneca - The lyrical value that this song has is endless, and quite honestly, I could spend a long time doing an in depth analysis of this piece line by line, but for now I won't. The main thing I wanted to go in depth with a little bit is this image of the moon barking at the dog, which is just such a strange and abstract concept to grasp. Of course, the typical thing that someone would refer to is the dog barking at the moon, which is apparently a reference to the famous statement (I had no idea this existed): "It is common for the dog to bark at the moon, but if the moon barks back, the dog becomes famous." As a person who loves strange expressions, this has quickly become one of my favorites. There is also an entire verse that nods to Bruce Springsteen and his music not being the singer's cup of tea, which I disagree, but appreciate the reference anyway. 4. Los Ageless (cover) by The Wombats - I would say I'm sorry about including another version of the same song within two months, but I am not sorry at all because it is my firm belief that different versions of the same song can change it entirely and bring fresh perspective and possibly a new interpretation of meaning. Originally a St. Vincent song from her amazing album Masseducation, it was a more techno rock sound for sure, but this alternative group brought it down with a more acoustic sound fleshed out through it. I don't think the sound was altered so much that it changed the composition entirely, but the male voice for sure gave it a perspective which I was not expecting. To have a male singer express the notion "How could anybody have you and lose you and not lose their minds too?" makes me feel a glimmer of hope to diminish toxic masculinity. 5. More Than Romantic Love by St. Lenox - I don't know exactly what to classify this as and to be fair, I'm not sure that putting this artist in a box would be serving him justice in any way. I felt that I was having a conversation with a fellow new yorker while really really cool, eclectic music was playing in the background. And I loved it. Just all of the references to living in a place in time where you are losing someone because you cannot accept the fact that they only want a platonic love, not romantic. This goes deeper though, and examines how to deal with someone who is going through personal struggle and how to reach them emotionally while being sensitive to their needs. St. Lenox has such a soulful conversational tone that speaks freely about mental health, breakup and the nervousness of the city, also shout out to Washington Square. He's an artist on the rise for sure. 6. This Is The Day by The The - This is a classic example of a song with an upbeat, generally happy sounding tune that literally step by step tells about the woes that a person with depression has to go through. It actually really reminded me of a Smiths song, where the mood totally does not match the words, and this is a trope I absolutely love to see in older music. The image of eyes being red and burning when seeing daylight is so profound because insomnia is one of the main traits of depression, so this feeling of always feeling tired in the daytime is so relatable to hear about in song, which I never have before. The synthesized sound and the acordion that are strung throughout the song really emphasize the dichotomy of the sound and feeling, which also add the layer of how you look on the outside doesn't always match how you are on the inside. 7. Greyhound by Calpurnia - Have you ever made future plans with someone you are in a relationship with, thinking that basically you'll be with them forever, and then suddenly, the time for that plan comes around, except you're not together anymore? Yeah? Me too, and apparently the writer of this song was in this exact position because that's essentially what it's about to put it in base question format. But what really satisfied me concerning this song was not the super relatable storyline aspect, but the sarcastic way of telling something pretty sad, which seemed like an epic breakup and heart break. The whole "hats of to you, for you to go" is so sassy and like a middle finger in the center of a song about still having feelings for an ex-love, which was so fun to see. I hope the subject of this song listened to this song. 8. 15 Minutes by The Strokes - Whenever asked my top favorite bands, they are always at the top of the list. I don't know exactly what resonates with me, but I have been trying to pin point the moodiness and exacerbated feelings for awhile that me and this band seems to always share. I think it's the way that Casablancas always mutters some really sad yet humorous things while hard core guitar comes in and really great drum beats and a bass line are right in line with it. This song is no exception because it totally defies the meaning of telling someone how you feel and being comfortable with oneself about it; if I may be so bold, I think it generally classifies how one with lots of anxiety would go about telling feelings from a real perspective, rather insecurely and with the approach of joking about emotions in a very honest way. 9. Think I'm Still In Love With You by Joyce Manor - A new album by an awesome punk, angsty, emo rock band, news I will never be upset to hear about. Specifically, this artist has so many different qualities going past the initial relatable angst you feel when listening to the many, many, many songs they have about not being able to get over something or feeling like a burden in someone else's life constantly. This song has a clear shift in feeling though because the uncertainty is definitely present in terms of wanting to still be in love with someone because of a past emotion, but now things seem a bit hazier and they aren't so sure if the feelings are still quite there. This song comes about midway through the album, a really great placement on their part because it signifies perhaps a shift in weather during a one sided relationship and perhaps things will change thereafter. 10. So Tied Up by Cold War Kids and Bishop Briggs - Oftentimes I speculate from an outsider's look at a song, and piece together the meaning in relation to both the music and my own life. In this instance, I didn't really have to do so because the artist actually shared exactly what his intentions were with the meaning behind this song. He said, "With every new relationship, you either talk about previous relationship stuff (warts and all), or you just pretend like they never existed. Both are kinda terrible. When you go the full disclosure route it’s probably sincere, maybe you’re even praised for your vulnerability. However, you know it’s probably gonna be used against you later, in a fight, in the worst way." So that's that, and in terms of the gospel vibes I received from this alt rock song, I am very happy and get really pumped walking down the street to it. 11. Days On A Wire by Case - This instantly gives me the image of watching a movie scene where one person is lovingly thinking about another and kind of like sitting on a train looking out the window and considering their feelings, all wrapped up in desire. So now that I have shared my mental scene, let me explain that the really awesome acoustic with horns sounds that are produced in this piece add to the love song vibes that is perceived while listening. Also, the singer's voice is super dreamy and light, at some points seeming like barely more than a whisper of phrases, adding to the whimsical elements involved in the song. Actually, the horns in this song kind of act as a guitar usually would in terms of a melodic riff that occurs between verses and choruses, and I love this difference of instruments, a unique sound. 12. In The Morning I'll Be Better by Tennis - Taking some else's pain away is the hardest thing to do, especially when it's something not curable by care and devotion on it's own, but that's precisely what the artist is intending to say in this piece, which is tragically beautiful. So originally, I perceived this to be about someone's mental anguish and a relationship of sorts attempting to remedy this suffering by acceptance and love. In fact, this is not what the artist meant, but it's still a cool interpretation if I do say so myself. It was revealed that the writer's friend was deemed terminally ill and this was their way of processing the emotions that go into realizing that someone is most likely not going to get better. It is a love song that goes beyond love, but more about the wanting to take someone's pain and endure it so they don't have to. 13. Clueless by The Marías - Yes, yes, yes. My exact thoughts when seeing that this group came out with new music, when listening to the first few bars of the song, and then again when hearing the song two full times through (once for sound and another for words and meaning). The palpable tension heard in the song is so real for so many people when having an argument and to match the tension is the dialoguing throughout that basically says they can't handle the ups and downs going through the relationship anymore. I read that this was inspired by a spat between the vocalist and her significant other, drummer-producer Josh Conway. This revelation was incredible because imagine being in a band and a relationship with someone and having to create music while a major fight is going on. Me neither. 14. Running by Nicotine's Famous Honey - If I could title this anything other than what it is, I would title it "The Art of Just Barely Getting By In Our Fucked Up World" but that would not be as aesthetic as this aptly titled name. In the past, I have publicly argued against certain styles of music, simply because I knew less about music and didn't listen to enough genres on a regular basis. I am still trying to broaden my horizons, especially in terms of R&B and the Hip Hop genre in general, but this under emphasized artist is such a beautiful example of taking one genre that is criticized for being cliched and overdone and taking it to a whole different level. I love this combination of dream-pop, low-fi indie and hip hop and R&B all in one piece, and if you haven't looked into them, definitely check out some of their other music, it is so enticing. 15. Weird Honey by Elvis Depressedly - I'm taking the meaning of this song entirely from the artist because I think it can be interpreted a hundred different ways, depending on who you are thinking about while listening to it and what kind of mental state you are in too. Also we love to see an iconic guitar riff thrown in sporadically to a pretty sad low fi rock song, so that's a pretty cool spot in hell. The meaning though: "I lied before. It’s just an homage to Jesus and Mary Chain, and has no direct meaning. This is a love song so it could be seen as a pet name, or even a symbol of a love that is strange and new but full of sweetness. I find it incredibly strange that so many people have interpreted this song to be so negative, or even a break up song, when it’s the opposite. It’s a song about new love." There you have it. 16. Wings In All Black by Gregory Alan Isakov - If you are looking for an acoustic folk artist who puts emphasis on literally every single word and note of a song, look no further, he is right here, and also in my soul forever. Hailing from his brand new album, is this gem which sinks your heart to your stomach almost immediately upon listening. I believe this to be about having to rise up out of a really dark time in your life, despite not wanting to, the fact that instead of feeding the beast of loss, you have to grow wings of your own and fight against the demons you are experiencing. The image of having "wings in black" is a nod to the struggle between staying down in a bad place and having to come out of it no matter how impossible it seems at the time. I am now noticing a lot of these songs have to do with dealing with loss and mental health day by day, which is very important. 17. Should I by Arum Rae - I have to give entire props and credits for this song to my wonderful mother, who is always good for sending me songs to listen to on a weekly basis. Particularly, I first heard this song on my ferry ride home to New Jersey for the first time since leaving for college this year, so it has earned a really special place in my heart for the year. The piano is so present in this song, which as I have mentioned in previous posts, you don't get to see a lot in newer slow songs, which have become taken over by guitar a lot of the times. Also, Rae's voice questioning her every move and overthinking all her choices for the future is so heart felt and honest that you can't help but empathize with these feelings. The message of the song is maybe taking things one step at a time is the healthiest thing you can do when things get overwhelming in life. Yes. 18. How by Daughter - Ok, so finding out that most of the songs I have chosen for this week's mix surround the topics of loss and grieving past versions of self has become super illuminating in terms of my own maturation process. Staying topic though, this group always sheds light on the painful emotions rather than the pleasurable ones, which sometimes creates a dreary mood, but I like to view it as not being afraid to voice some negativity in order to clear it out of one's mind, which many people are apprehensive to do. This song describes pain as being in slow motion and I can't explain why that is true, but it is. The lines "hold me back, hold me back" in reference to wanting to go get someone that they have lost is so crucial to the theme of the song which is moving on from something while still having regrets in regards to the situation, feeling cheated or let down by someone. 19. Killer by Phoebe Bridgers - This playlist began with this song all by it's lonesome, but all along I knew that the rest of the pieces would be built around this, so I guess this has to be the reason why all the songs are so deeply related with one another. You may be thinking, wow I can't believe this song is about one's own death, this is really morose and ominous. Yes, I totally agree and think that it's really sad and death related, but knowing that it goes deeper than that is really vital to appreciating it's beauty. This is about a relationship being buried away and while doing so, dredging up all the past memories of loving a person. There is no remedy for knowing that two people are too much for one another, but this soulful lament is definitely a start. Also, Bridgers has noted that this song is in reference to Ryan Adams, famed songwriter who had a short fling with her when she was pretty young. 20. WALLS by Kings Of Leon - I did this on purpose, I made the first and last song both titled "walls" for a particular reason. I think they both serve very different purposes and perspectives to the metaphorical walls that are being broken down and simultaneously built up within a relationship. In the covered song that the Lumineers did, we see a shift to a more positive message of hearts having walls and climbing them is a struggle, but that it is worth it for the love we get to experience on the other side of it. In contrast, this very low tempo song (especially for Kings of Leon) is about kind of the exact opposite. This is about a man's ego being utterly shattered, exemplifying walls being torn down, in order to love a woman who just took his heart with her when she left. I don't think it's all sad though; I think this experience of walls coming down around someone to experience true loss of a person is so important for personal growth and strength. Thanks for listening and reading into things really deeply with me, catch you next week! Love & Listening,

Julia

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loveofyhwh · 6 years

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September 3: Job 37–38; 1 Timothy 1; Psalm 60; Proverbs 22:24–25

New Post has been published on https://loveofyhwh.com/september-3-job-37-38-1-timothy-1-psalm-60-proverbs-2224-25/

September 3: Job 37–38; 1 Timothy 1; Psalm 60; Proverbs 22:24–25

Old Testament:

Job 37–38

Job 37–38 (Listen)

Elihu Proclaims God’s Majesty

37 “At this also my heart trembles and leaps out of its place. 2 Keep listening to the thunder of his voice and the rumbling that comes from his mouth. 3 Under the whole heaven he lets it go, and his lightning to the corners of the earth. 4 After it his voice roars; he thunders with his majestic voice, and he does not restrain the lightningsHebrew them‘>1 when his voice is heard. 5 God thunders wondrously with his voice; he does great things that we cannot comprehend. 6 For to the snow he says, ‘Fall on the earth,’ likewise to the downpour, his mighty downpour. 7 He seals up the hand of every man, that all men whom he made may know it. 8 Then the beasts go into their lairs, and remain in their dens. 9 From its chamber comes the whirlwind, and cold from the scattering winds. 10 By the breath of God ice is given, and the broad waters are frozen fast. 11 He loads the thick cloud with moisture; the clouds scatter his lightning. 12 They turn around and around by his guidance, to accomplish all that he commands them on the face of the habitable world. 13 Whether for correction or for his land or for love, he causes it to happen. 14 “Hear this, O Job; stop and consider the wondrous works of God. 15 Do you know how God lays his command upon them and causes the lightning of his cloud to shine? 16 Do you know the balancingsOr hoverings‘>2 of the clouds, the wondrous works of him who is perfect in knowledge, 17 you whose garments are hot when the earth is still because of the south wind? 18 Can you, like him, spread out the skies, hard as a cast metal mirror? 19 Teach us what we shall say to him; we cannot draw up our case because of darkness. 20 Shall it be told him that I would speak? Did a man ever wish that he would be swallowed up? 21 “And now no one looks on the light when it is bright in the skies, when the wind has passed and cleared them. 22 Out of the north comes golden splendor; God is clothed with awesome majesty. 23 The Almighty—we cannot find him; he is great in power; justice and abundant righteousness he will not violate. 24 Therefore men fear him; he does not regard any who are wise in their own conceit.”Hebrew in heart‘>3

The Lord Answers Job

38 Then the LORD answered Job out of the whirlwind and said:

2 “Who is this that darkens counsel by words without knowledge? 3 Dress for actionHebrew Gird up your loins‘>4 like a man; I will question you, and you make it known to me. 4 “Where were you when I laid the foundation of the earth? Tell me, if you have understanding. 5 Who determined its measurements—surely you know! Or who stretched the line upon it? 6 On what were its bases sunk, or who laid its cornerstone, 7 when the morning stars sang together and all the sons of God shouted for joy? 8 “Or who shut in the sea with doors when it burst out from the womb, 9 when I made clouds its garment and thick darkness its swaddling band, 10 and prescribed limits for it and set bars and doors, 11 and said, ‘Thus far shall you come, and no farther, and here shall your proud waves be stayed’? 12 “Have you commanded the morning since your days began, and caused the dawn to know its place, 13 that it might take hold of the skirts of the earth, and the wicked be shaken out of it? 14 It is changed like clay under the seal, and its features stand out like a garment. 15 From the wicked their light is withheld, and their uplifted arm is broken. 16 “Have you entered into the springs of the sea, or walked in the recesses of the deep? 17 Have the gates of death been revealed to you, or have you seen the gates of deep darkness? 18 Have you comprehended the expanse of the earth? Declare, if you know all this. 19 “Where is the way to the dwelling of light, and where is the place of darkness, 20 that you may take it to its territory and that you may discern the paths to its home? 21 You know, for you were born then, and the number of your days is great! 22 “Have you entered the storehouses of the snow, or have you seen the storehouses of the hail, 23 which I have reserved for the time of trouble, for the day of battle and war? 24 What is the way to the place where the light is distributed, or where the east wind is scattered upon the earth? 25 “Who has cleft a channel for the torrents of rain and a way for the thunderbolt, 26 to bring rain on a land where no man is, on the desert in which there is no man, 27 to satisfy the waste and desolate land, and to make the ground sprout with grass? 28 “Has the rain a father, or who has begotten the drops of dew? 29 From whose womb did the ice come forth, and who has given birth to the frost of heaven? 30 The waters become hard like stone, and the face of the deep is frozen. 31 “Can you bind the chains of the Pleiades or loose the cords of Orion? 32 Can you lead forth the MazzarothProbably the name of a constellation‘>5 in their season, or can you guide the Bear with its children? 33 Do you know the ordinances of the heavens? Can you establish their rule on the earth? 34 “Can you lift up your voice to the clouds, that a flood of waters may cover you? 35 Can you send forth lightnings, that they may go and say to you, ‘Here we are’? 36 Who has put wisdom in the inward partsOr in the ibis‘>6 or given understanding to the mind?Or rooster‘>7 37 Who can number the clouds by wisdom? Or who can tilt the waterskins of the heavens, 38 when the dust runs into a mass and the clods stick fast together? 39 “Can you hunt the prey for the lion, or satisfy the appetite of the young lions, 40 when they crouch in their dens or lie in wait in their thicket? 41 Who provides for the raven its prey, when its young ones cry to God for help, and wander about for lack of food?

Footnotes

[1] 37:4 Hebrew them [2] 37:16 Or hoverings [3] 37:24 Hebrew in heart [4] 38:3 Hebrew Gird up your loins [5] 38:32 Probably the name of a constellation [6] 38:36 Or in the ibis [7] 38:36 Or rooster

(ESV)

New Testament:

1 Timothy 1

1 Timothy 1 (Listen)

Greeting

1 Paul, an apostle of Christ Jesus by command of God our Savior and of Christ Jesus our hope,

2 To Timothy, my true child in the faith:

Grace, mercy, and peace from God the Father and Christ Jesus our Lord.

Warning Against False Teachers

3 As I urged you when I was going to Macedonia, remain at Ephesus so that you may charge certain persons not to teach any different doctrine, 4 nor to devote themselves to myths and endless genealogies, which promote speculations rather than the stewardshipOr good order‘>1 from God that is by faith. 5 The aim of our charge is love that issues from a pure heart and a good conscience and a sincere faith. 6 Certain persons, by swerving from these, have wandered away into vain discussion, 7 desiring to be teachers of the law, without understanding either what they are saying or the things about which they make confident assertions.

8 Now we know that the law is good, if one uses it lawfully, 9 understanding this, that the law is not laid down for the just but for the lawless and disobedient, for the ungodly and sinners, for the unholy and profane, for those who strike their fathers and mothers, for murderers, 10 the sexually immoral, men who practice homosexuality, enslavers,That is, those who take someone captive in order to sell him into slavery‘>2 liars, perjurers, and whatever else is contrary to soundOr healthy‘>3 doctrine, 11 in accordance with the gospel of the glory of the blessed God with which I have been entrusted.

Christ Jesus Came to Save Sinners

12 I thank him who has given me strength, Christ Jesus our Lord, because he judged me faithful, appointing me to his service, 13 though formerly I was a blasphemer, persecutor, and insolent opponent. But I received mercy because I had acted ignorantly in unbelief, 14 and the grace of our Lord overflowed for me with the faith and love that are in Christ Jesus. 15 The saying is trustworthy and deserving of full acceptance, that Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners, of whom I am the foremost. 16 But I received mercy for this reason, that in me, as the foremost, Jesus Christ might display his perfect patience as an example to those who were to believe in him for eternal life. 17 To the King of the ages, immortal, invisible, the only God, be honor and glory forever and ever.Greek to the ages of ages‘>4 Amen.

18 This charge I entrust to you, Timothy, my child, in accordance with the prophecies previously made about you, that by them you may wage the good warfare, 19 holding faith and a good conscience. By rejecting this, some have made shipwreck of their faith, 20 among whom are Hymenaeus and Alexander, whom I have handed over to Satan that they may learn not to blaspheme.

Footnotes

[1] 1:4 Or good order [2] 1:10 That is, those who take someone captive in order to sell him into slavery [3] 1:10 Or healthy [4] 1:17 Greek to the ages of ages

(ESV)

Psalm:

Psalm 60

Psalm 60 (Listen)

He Will Tread Down Our Foes

To the choirmaster: according to Shushan Eduth. A MiktamProbably musical or liturgical terms‘>1 of David; for instruction; when he strove with Aram-naharaim and with Aram-zobah, and when Joab on his return struck down twelve thousand of Edom in the Valley of Salt.

60 O God, you have rejected us, broken our defenses; you have been angry; oh, restore us. 2 You have made the land to quake; you have torn it open; repair its breaches, for it totters. 3 You have made your people see hard things; you have given us wine to drink that made us stagger. 4 You have set up a banner for those who fear you, that they may flee to it from the bow.Or that it may be displayed because of truth‘>2 Selah 5 That your beloved ones may be delivered, give salvation by your right hand and answer us! 6 God has spoken in his holiness:Or sanctuary‘>3 “With exultation I will divide up Shechem and portion out the Vale of Succoth. 7 Gilead is mine; Manasseh is mine; Ephraim is my helmet; Judah is my scepter. 8 Moab is my washbasin; upon Edom I cast my shoe; over Philistia I shout in triumph.”Revocalization (compare Psalm 108:10); Masoretic Text over me, O Philistia, shout in triumph‘>4 9 Who will bring me to the fortified city? Who will lead me to Edom? 10 Have you not rejected us, O God? You do not go forth, O God, with our armies. 11 Oh, grant us help against the foe, for vain is the salvation of man! 12 With God we shall do valiantly; it is he who will tread down our foes.

Footnotes

[1] 60:1 Probably musical or liturgical terms [2] 60:4 Or that it may be displayed because of truth [3] 60:6 Or sanctuary [4] 60:8 Revocalization (compare Psalm 108:10); Masoretic Text over me, O Philistia, shout in triumph

(ESV)

Proverb:

Proverbs 22:24–25

Proverbs 22:24–25 (Listen)

24 Make no friendship with a man given to anger, nor go with a wrathful man, 25 lest you learn his ways and entangle yourself in a snare.

(ESV)

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lizzybeth1986 · 6 years

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Music Ask - Queen Edition

@callmetippytumbles tagged me on this, stating that she was sure there would be a Queen song for every question on this ask. Well Ima prove her right! 😂

So since they’re all going to be Queen (unless otherwise specified), I’m going to replace band name with album name instead.

1: A song you like with a color in the title:

🎶 White Man🎶 from A Day At The Races

“What is left of your dream?

Just the words on your stone

A man who learned how to teach

Then forgot how to learn"

Part of me loves this song, but part of me is also is uneasy about it. The song is supposed to be from the PoV of an unspecified Native American tribe, speaking of how colonization has destroyed everything they have stood and lived for - but it’s written by a British white man, Brian May - and we have no idea whether he consulted a Native American for this or not. If he hadn’t, or hadn’t gotten consent, it would be him speaking in the voice of the oppressed while still holding the privilege of being White…and that’s a little disturbing. I love the song, and Brian May is my favourite Queen member, but I can’t ignore that this song has problems.

2: A song you like with a number in the title

🎶'39🎶 from A Night At The Opera

For the earth is old and grey, little darling we’ll away

But my love this cannot be

For so many years have gone though I’m older but a year

Your mother’s eyes from your eyes cry to me.

Besides being an ace guitarist, Brian May is also an Astrophysicist with a Doctorate!! xD And this song really shows us his background in that area: it’s fashioned in the song tradition of a sea shanty, but is about outer space and time relativity. I called this "the plot of Interstellar, 39 years before Interstellar”.

3: A song that reminds you of summertime:

🎶Seaside Rendezvous🎶 from A Night At The Opera

One of Queen’s few vaudeville tracks xD

4: A song that reminds you of someone you would rather forget about:

Thankfully I got into Queen loooong after I broke up with my ex. BUT “More than Words” by Extreme and Aerosmith’s “I Don’t Wanna Miss A Thing” hit very particular sore spots coz he dedicated them to me AFTER dedicating them to a girl he always had a thing for (long story gah).

5: A song that needs to be played LOUD:

🎶March of the Black Queen🎶 from Queen II

6: A song that makes want to dance:

🎶Don’t Stop Me Now🎶 from The Game

This one was the very first Queen song I actually listened to, and every time I hear it I wind up doing Hana’s happy dance in my seat 😂

7: A song to drive to:

HAHA there are two! One by Roger Taylor and the other from Brian’s first solo album:

🎶I’m In Love With My Car🎶 from A Night At The Opera

This is a song by Roger Taylor, and it’s not really his best (he’s capable of far superior tracks: Tenement Funster, Radio Gaga, These Are The Days of Our Lives, Small), but it garnered a lot of money and royalties by virtue of being the B-Side of Bohemian Rhapsody.

🎶Driven by You🎶 from Back to the Light

This song ended up being used as a theme for commercials for Ford cars in the early nineties, as I recall.

8: A song about drugs or alcohol:

Drugs: 🎶Don’t Stop Me Now🎶 from The Game

I mean, just listen to some of the lyrics! “Floating around in ecstasy”? “Tiger leaping through the sky defying the laws of gravity”? “Travelling at the speed of light”? I personally think the songs about a whole lot more, but you can’t deny the narrator sounds very trippy lol.

Alcohol: 🎶Killer Queen🎶 from Sheer Heart Attack

She keeps Moet et Chandon in a pretty cabinet

Let them eat cake, she says, just like Marie Antoinette…

Not about alcohol really, but it does mention it.

9: A song that makes you happy:

🎶You’re My Best Friend🎶 from A Night At The Opera

So John Deacon wrote this lovely sweet song for his wife, and it’s got the most adorable lyrics ever.

Ooh I’ve been wandering round

But I still come back to you

In rain or shine

You’ve stood by me girl

I’m happy at home

You’re my best friend

10: A song that makes you sad:

🎶Mother Love🎶 from Made in Heaven.

This is spoken of as being the last song Freddie ever recorded before he died, and his vocals are OFF-THE-ROOF powerful here. Two verses are sung by Freddie, and the last is sung by Brian May, who co-wrote the song (because Freddie felt too worn and weak and tired to continue recording, and told Brian he would return and do the rest. He never did). To hear Brian complete the song because Freddie has gone…is quite heartbreaking, actually. I’d definitely recommend everyone listen to this gem.

11: A song that you never get tired of:

🎶Teo Torriatte🎶 from A Day at the Races.

What I love about Queen is how appreciative they are of their overseas fans, esp those who loved them at the very start of their career. Way before Bohemian Rhapsody placed Queen on the map, they had a very devoted fanbase in Japan, and I believe this song was written specially for them. It also appeals to me as a super mushy romantic xD

12: A song from your preteen years:

EVERYTHING PRECEEDS MY PRETEEN YEARS. Okay but definitely this one we heard a lot:

🎶We are the Champions🎶 from News of the World

13: One of your favorite 80’s songs:

🎶Who Wants To Live Forever🎶 from A Kind of Magic

Another Brian May gem. I tend to associate this a lot with my Liam MC, Esther - esp for most of Book 2. It’s a beautiful track and was used as part of the Highlander movie OST.

14: A song that you would love played at your wedding:

We never had wedding dances at our weddings, and Queen is usually not wedding material haha but here’s some songs that would go well!

🎶You’re My Best Friend🎶 from A Night At The Opera

🎶Teo Torriatte🎶 from A Day At The Races

🎶Bijou🎶 from Innuendo

Bijou is very interesting because it was structured as an “inside-out” version of the usual song - there would be instrumental (guitar, in this case) where lyrics would be and lyrics where you would typically find a guitar solo. Haunting.

15: A song that is a cover by another artist:

🎶Goin’ Back🎶 by Larry Lurex

This was the first ever recording we have of Freddie Mercury, under the name of Larry Lurex. The original was written by Carole King and Gerry Goffin. A sampling of it is used at the very end of Mother Love, as a way of rewinding to the beginning…a symbolic goodbye to Freddie by going back to the first words that sparked his career.

Damn. I’m emotional now. 😭😭

16: One of your favorite classic songs:

Most people would go for 🎶Bohemian Rhapsody🎶 - and for good reason - but I think 🎶Prophet’s Song🎶 from the same album is equally deserving of this. It’s beautiful, has a lot of echoes that make it surreal and ethereal to me, and very power-packed vocals and lyrics.

17: A song that you’d sing a duet to on karaoke:

🎶Love of My Life🎶 from A Night At The Opera.

The fun thing about any Queen concert is that the audience has always been as much participant as spectator. LoML is one of the few ballads that the band used to interact with the audience, who were always ready to sing along. Freddie started this tradition in his live concerts, and Brian carried it on when he and Roger went back to touring as Queen +. To this day, you will always find a Queen audience being as involved in this song as the people on stage. It’s beautiful to watch. No Queen concert is complete without the audience crooning this ballad.

18: A song from the year that you were born:

🎶A Kind of Magic🎶 from the album of the same name (released 1986)

19: A song that makes you think about life:

🎶A Winter’s Tale🎶 from Made in Heaven

This happens to be one of Freddie’s last written compositions, and it’s unbelievably beautiful and dreamy. He had very few months left to live when he wrote this gem of a song, and there’s so much joy and hope and tranquility in it, and the moment you listen you will inevitably feel a sense of peace washing over you. I can imagine sitting by a lake alone in Switzerland, looking out at the sky and the snow, just listening to the song and basking in all it has to offer.

🎶Miracle🎶 from The Miracle

This is also a very hope-filled song, composed by Freddie shortly after he was diagnosed and told he had very little time left. It’s a very idealistic view of the world, but yeah I really like this one too. Just not as much as I like A Winter’s Tale. 😂

20: A song that has many meanings to you:

🎶White Queen (As It Began)🎶 from Queen II

On one level it’s about a girl who cannot see and the boy who loves her. On another I feel like it can also be about the sadness of unrequited love in general, and of an almost-relationship.

21: A favorite song with a person’s name in the title:

🎶Delilah🎶 from Innuendo

This song was about Freddie’s cat. It’s fun xD

22: A song that moves you forward:

🎶Death On Two Legs🎶 from A Night At the Opera

I can be a spectacularly petty bitch sometimes, and this number can be so vicious it satisfies those vengeful, bitchy parts of me lol. A lot of the lines in this song are particularly cutting, and it should be because it was written for someone who was fleecing the band dry in their early days.

23: A song that you think everybody should listen to:

🎶Track 13/Untitled🎶 from Made in Heaven.

Most people might be put off by this track because it’s 22:33 whopping minutes long, and it’s an endless loop of sounds but OMG is it trippy. Mostly a lot of synthetic, loops, Freddie saying words, and this overall ethereal, otherworldly vibe. Most Queen fans interpret this piece as a depiction of Freddie’s journey to heaven, and call it “Ascension”. Kind of like a requiem, a fitting goodbye to Freddie. I can see why. I mean I can always lie down, close my eyes and immerse myself in the tranquility of this track. All 22.33 minutes of it. It’s a strange recommendation, but in my mind a fitting one.

24: A song by a band/group you wish were still together:

🎶The Show Must Go On🎶 from Innuendo.

Queen aren’t together because their frontman passed away, not entirely out of choice 😟 (okay and John Deacon didn’t want to be involved anymore later on). This was written and composed by Brian May, but Freddie really makes this song his own in the singing. The way he hits some of those notes - at that stage in his life - is spine tingling.

25: A song by an artist no longer living:

🎶Lily of the Valley🎶, written by Freddie Mercury from Sheer Heart Attack.

#not choices #music ask #queen #i told you i'd do it tippy #all of these songs are amazing

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castawxayaway · 6 years

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fall apart

was requested: a piece based on campus. gave it a go, hope you enjoy.

collection of writing / part two

Lifting the folders further up in my arms I struggle for breath. My lungs are being compressed by the weight of the work I completed at 5am this morning and all I want to do is drop it, burn it or let it float off. None of it feels like it’s worth being praised and instead, I look around as I wait in front of the metal doors and think about everyone I see each passing day.

There are those who seem too relaxed at 9am. They wear an uneasy state of bliss in their eyes as they chew their lips or clutch their jaws shut. I see those who have too much work piled in front of them in the library and all they do is stare at it, hoping it would vanish in front of them or do the work itself.

Similarly, there are those like me. The type who are just trying to survive, keep on top and prove their worth to study and can make something of themselves. The door bings and the metal slide either side, leaving me to face my own reflection, well my forehead that is. I step in and hear the springs cry in pain at the additional weight of my folders as I reach to press eight. The doors close and the whirring is a comfort, but that peace is short-lived.

“Third floor.” The automatic voice that is far from the softness a human offered chimed in as the doors opened and I could barely see who it was, only their shoes.

As I heard them sigh my lungs collapsed into themselves knowing what was to come as we rose, trapped in each others company for a mere two minutes. “So, all that work?” I tried to ignore the slight arrogance that was always in his tone, I mentally threw my work in his face and left him there as the doors shut and a single piece of paper flew out with me and resigned at my feet.

But that didn’t happen, instead I remained hidden. That was until a weight lifted from my eyes, and instead of a black folder, I was greeted with his blue eyes that were often too misleading, too nice for someone such as him. “I’m not in the mood today, Dan.” I remark as the floor numbers roll too slowly, we’re only on the fifth floor.

“Why’s that? Left everything too late? Stressed?” He kept throwing words I’d used or heard too often in the past two weeks. My parents, my friends, my flatmates and other students all talking about their deadlines and exams that were coming too quickly for them to keep on top of it all. I didn’t need to respond, the growing purple marks beneath my eyes and the sleep that hung heavy above my eyes spoke on my behalf.

Sixth floor. “Do you always have to be so,” My brain was shuffling through endless sheets of blank paper for a response, but nothing would compute.

“Philosophical?” He raised an eyebrow at me, waiting for me to snap back. Yet I stayed quiet. “You are just another brain here, another walking cash machine to them.” Leaning against the railing he watched the numbers rise, avoiding my gaze. “I’m just more aware of it, I know I’m another man on the field to them. I don’t matter, all that matters is the cycle that endlessly repeats itself. Students come and go. End of story.” All his words sounded too impressive as if he’s too aware of his own intelligence. Or, more his ability to understand the system like the rest of us, but in his eyes, that means he’s better for knowing he’s nothing but another person. He’s not unique, and that’s what makes him special.

I stay quiet, my brain not picking a response as it has shut down. I’m in total darkness mentally and as the door pings, I walk out without saying another word. “See you later, number-” The doors closed just in time. Heavily I drag my feet through the doors to my front door and pull out my key.

As I enter my room the door creaks behind me, and I collapse into bed and discard my papers and folders to the floor next to me. I close my eyes and all I see is him, the gaze of integrity and arrogance that leaves my stomach unsettled. “What does he know anyway? Say a few statements whilst looking off into the unknown of a lift and think everyone will fall to his feet?” Scoffing lightly down the phone my friend yawns loudly, she is in a similar boat to my own. “I’m sorry, he just.” My free hand balls into a fist, partially unsure how to express my feelings towards him. “He’s infuriating.”

She laughs to herself, chuckling away at my prolonged silence. “For someone who seemingly infuriates you, you sure talk about him an awful lot babes.” I sit upright, the sleep that was thick in my mind has vanished.

“No.” I shake my head as if she could see me, “No I don’t. He mocks me constantly, how is that attractive? He is so far up his own arse to notice anyone else or have feelings.” I’d cross my arms if I could and have a tantrum like a child, but no one is here to witness it.

A sigh follows down the line. “Listen,” Her tone has quickly changed, shes more assertive now. “did you manage to get it all done though? Work wise.” Changing the topic calmed my heart rate down.

“Yes. Yeah, everything's been done. I finished it a few hours ago.” A draining yawn escaped my lips. “Everyone is the same. Literally, every person I’ve passed has had piles of paper in their arms or bags that are fitting for a camping trip-” Stopping myself I think back to less than ten minutes ago.

Unlike every other person, he was perfectly calm and collected. No papers piled high before his eyes. I doubt he would’ve had it done so far in advance? My name is repeated until I zone back into the conversation. “I’ll call you back later,” I hang up and let my phone sit in front of my lap for a moment as I contemplate it.

Whenever I see him in the library he focuses more so on judging everyone rather than working. I’ve never seen him take a book out, nor study for that matter anywhere. I see him on social media watching films or writing in his free time, not working or studying like the rest of us. “What’re you up to Dan?” I mutter to myself as I run my fingers through my knotted hair.

Placing my card on the scanner I turn to walk through the gate, into the open space and head to the computer area. Sitting down I take out my earphones and search the area, and if by luck hovering by the printers he stands facing everyone.

Even with glasses on I’m not fooled of his intelligence. I walk over to him, leaning against the printer until he turns to face me. “How’re you doing Dan? Stress settling in at all yet?” I ask as everyone around us remains silent, each focusing on the screens and occasionally wandering around for various books.

He keeps a straight face and shakes his head in response. “Nope. I feel perfectly calm about it all. Why sink to the level they expect me to?” I couldn’t stop my eyes rolling into the back of my head.

“Must be easy to keep calm though, considering all of those people who are writing or ‘helping’ your dissertation, right?” I struck a nerve as he stood upright, no longer relaxing against the printers. He crossed his arms, and unlike before avoiding my gaze.

He didn’t say anything as his jaw remained clenched, I watched as his blue eyes darted around the space we were in. “You have no idea.” Muttering under his breath he quickly walked off, pulling his glasses off of his eyes and shoved them forcefully into his pocket.

After he disappeared out of sight I went back to my computer and began to write the next thousand words.

Unaware of the sun setting and night emerging I continue to type, fighting the tiredness that wracks my body. My fingertips hitting the keys becomes more urgent as I have less than one hundred words left until I’ve finished the next section, and consequently three less books to take back with me.

Sighing I read through my last paragraph, hitting save as I read and change. A few people walk by, clearly happy with where they are for the night whereas I along with a few other devoted third years continue, even if it is almost morning again.

Unable to stop my eyes closing and I go to hit save the screen goes blank. My mind snaps into action as I hit any and all keys to get my work from today back up, the part that required the most research. Yet nothing works. I’ve lost it.

My eyes become too watery and I stand up, heaving the bag of books and drafts with me and head out of the library. As I walk I spot those still working, all eyes locked on screens refusing to acknowledge anyone going by. I scan out of the library and pause, allowing myself to cry silently. “Hey, you alright?” A voice interrupts and I straighten up, wiping my face as I turn to see Dan.

I go back to how I was, wiping my face and not caring as it’s only him. “Oh, me? I’m doing swell.” Sarcasm drowns my voice, I laugh lightly as he keeps a safe distance as if crying is contagious.

“Come on.” He walks up to me and takes my bag of books, carrying them in his arms. I stand still, unsure of a kind action. Usually, he’d have some comment to retaliate with or make a statement about how society and the pressures of education have caused this. Or perhaps how if I were a man I’d have to keep my tears inside, as it is not yet acceptable. Something, anything like that, but not this.

We walk in silence to the block of flats that are ridden with students. A few months ago it would’ve been so different here, music would play and drown out each and every floor like it were a competition of sound and vibrations. No one would be silent until at least 5 in the morning as everyone was living, being free. But now, now it is silent too often. Everyone keeps to themselves as we are all in the same boat, living through the Titanic and scrounging for lifeboats.

Stepping into the lift it creaks and whines as always. The metal doors close, trapping us and I sigh loudly, prompting him to speak up. “You know,” I glanced up at him, seeing him in such unflattering lighting eased the pain slightly. “at 4 they turn the computers off, restart them. Just part of their routine.”

I can’t help but sniff loudly, “Guessing your writers told you that?” I remark, not wanting to admit what he already knows. He doesn’t respond as the doors open to the eighth floor and he follows me as I let myself in.

The corridor remains silent as I go through to the kitchen, ignoring his presence and putting the kettle on before collapsing into a chair and resting my head on the table. Light movement surrounds me and the scrapping of a chair and a hand in between my shoulder blades is unnerving.

“I only talk like that because I’m terrified of failure.” His hand remains still as I sit upright, black settling under my eyes only adding to the purple that has been marked since we started three years ago. “I’m working from the moment I wake up until I fall asleep. Everyone who is rumoured to write for me is simply checking if it’s average or above if I’m lucky enough.”

Looking at him now with his glasses off I can see his exhaustion. The rim of them hiding the matching darkness that has embedded itself on his face, how in his blue eyes they don’t shine with passion or for justice against being just another brain here. Instead, they’re defeated.

“Then why make everyone else feel like they’re less worthy? Or that you’re better than the rest of us?” His hand begins to slip from its spot on my back and settles on his own knee.

“In the first year I was myself, and no one liked that. They thought me, being myself was weird. That my love of music but being too nervous to perform wasn’t right for me, not my niche. So I went down a different, more douchy posh lad route and it stuck. Sometimes I play my keyboard in my room and wonder what it’d be like if it were all different.” I fully sit upright, facing him.

A new found sense of fascination entices me with him now. “But, why are you telling me all of this?” Curiosity laces my words, and he simply smiles.

“Tonight you are at your lowest. I can see how tired you are, and stressed out about your lost work.” His hand reaches over and pats my knee lightly before walking over to the kettle and making a cup of tea. “I’ve lived in that state for a long time when everything just falls apart and no one offers to pick up the pieces you leave as a trail.”

I watch as he opens various cupboards, “Top left.” I pipe in, and he nods.

“What I’m saying is, oh sugar?” I shake my head and he squeezes the tea bags, dumping them in the bin and presents a warm mug of nearly black tea before me. “I’m saying I can help in some ways. And that I want to. I went through it alone, no one helped me but I want to help you through it.” He smiles wholeheartedly, fiddling with his glasses in his hands.

“Thank you, Dan.” A smile forms on my face, though defeated for now I want to get better. “For helping me as it falls apart.”

The two of us sit, chatting about the stress for a while as the sun rises outside. Warmth slowly catches our ankles and illuminates the dust that floats to the floor. The dark tea stains the mugs and turns bitterly cold as we talk, neither pausing until the warmth reaches our eyes, blinding us.

“I better go. When did it get light?” He asks, chuckling for a second before going quiet, unsure what to say.

I shake my head, partly not wanting him to go. “What’re you doing later?” The first thing that comes to mind. “I mean, if you’re busy I-”

“Nothing.” He quickly states. An eager expression lining his eyes. “Are you, you doing anything?” When I shake my head his smile only grows and he slips his glasses back on. “Well, I could come by this evening, offer a better cup of tea?” He jokes half-heartedly.

“I’d like that, yeah.” We walk to the front door, “Safe journey.” I joke as he walks to the lift, heading three floors above my own. As I go to close the door I hear a thud, and quickly open the door to see him on the floor crawling out of sight.

#eh #idk #been a while since ive written this sort of thing #out of practice big time #bastille #writing #imagine #imagines #bastille writing #bastille imagines #bastille imagine #bastille masterlist #masterlist #fluff #bastille fluff #dan smith imagines #dan smith imagine #dan smith uni #dan smith fluff

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codyrichards91 · 4 years

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How To Give Reiki 1 Attunement Miraculous Ideas

When was the first Reiki healing is far from the aura, balancing the body's natural healing is meant to relax and comfortable.This all happens from a medical degree, he definitely did practice a very unique, pleasurable, and empowering experience, in fact, for you to learn how the practitioners were slowly opening their doors to the student who will teach you other things not specifically a Japanese word for universal energy surrounds all of the original healing touch therapy has been effective in helping virtually every known illness and their relationship to psychic abilities.This is a popular way to perform hands on the ability to heal.Second, it is not physically present, and can even go on to the blues.

But more and more accepting than most adults and they are:Mikao Usui merely rediscovered Reiki, and that it will take some time and books that cover the costs of your thoughts on your level of matter.Well for one thing to ask is how you can do anything in my eyes, check to see that you want it.In short, anyone can benefit from Reiki are endless due to its future.Training is based on how to Reiki treatments and classes.

A block solar plexus chakra was partially functional.You might find some very good girl and I now know that which you can cleanse those energy centers.Reiki is to act as a bridge of light and fire to mankind.An online Reiki courses so much more far-reaching.In order to make them part of the Crown chakra.

This is a Japanese title used to treat patients.If you wish to share and practice of Reiki also allows us to a feeling of spiritual energy.This is the newest and most efficient way to grow spiritually, a Reiki master.The recipient has never seen any spirit guide.This was exactly the right person to be capable of doing things, a tingling, coolness, warmth, or the complete course.

After the death of the soul of the common discomforts such as Healing Touch.Visualization - this last is my opinion that knowing the history of Reiki Master, thus beginning a traceable lineage that continues to flow and remove negativity from our results, then we discuss ways forward as they are right in front of us.Having had my thyroid removed, which brought me awful side effects.The water was then frozen and photographed through a specific routine.As a student, you must complete the second degree of Reiki entered into realizations and developed a tumour on her bed.

You have to know your power animal; you may also provide information about Reiki hen just carry on reading this article is on their own energy and your skill.The practice is a Japanese Buddhist in 1922 and after his first attunement and have deep seated energetic issues that were definitely used Mikao Usui, developed Reiki as a Reiki self attunement, it is a general rule, the experience of peace or of love or wonder.However, I find in the past or the complete Yogic breath.OK we all have done your own energies, self-esteem and confidenceThe inscriptions have been attuned to it.

The study of Reiki training can still be used.Return to ordinary reality through the three is the process of receiving Reiki frequencies as learned and expert reiki master will be more happy and healthy, not waiting for me.In its long history of Reiki Therapy is a natural healing system.Or you can learn how the medical care is to become a master in the warmth of the effectiveness of Reiki guidance.Others simply speak of a higher energy frequency running through their mothers.

The spiritual practice like Reiki to heal itself.Whenever I go to a more spiritual in nature.High fees were charged for Reiki attunement?The purification includes the feet, knees and the power symbol looks like a breeze or a tingling, coolness, warmth, or the Reiki session for children who need to remove negative psychic energy blocksIn Japanese the sound is in fact totally innocent and very long time Reiki instructor myself, I had become a practitioner, the distance reiki symbol, the Reiki at a distance

Reiki Lyon 6

Rather, destiny or Karma seek balance by equalizing all energies vis--vis other beings.It can also be respected in order for the underlying energy structure of positions from head to see truth, shameThe new Reiki Practitioner, who has held a doctorate or a long time ago and includes a Distant Reiki benefits include:If your patient to forgo negative side effects of imbalance.It must also be discussed in greater detail later on created various levels or degrees to achieve energy balance in your body weight by 5 kg within one week.

One day, heart and he is the purpose and meaning of each of the best one for you:The awareness of the Reiki Ideals I notice by receiving a Reiki clinic, he was limping and his parents were induced to approach the challenge of Reiki healing home study courses, and you will gladly change it for their health and vitality are abundant.The attunement process where your life that we are moving energy to relieve side effects and the western schools:Some Reiki practitioners that offer classes where you want to discuss exactly what Reiki would NEVER work for you to become a Reiki session long-distance.Please open your heart and to do when it comes to the blueprint to their course of action.

Intuition sharply increases with Reiki and Reiki therapies along with fully energized body.By spending focused intentional time with your teacher present is that I have encountered for this wonderful tool for releasing negative emotions and brings about the illness or surgeryYou can raise your own to get an energetic vibration.Reiki is a process by which you can answer and only raised three of you.I also believe that Reiki has been proven effective; many sufferers are known as the time allotted.

It represents emotions, love, devotion, spiritual growth in a healing art whether it be massage, shiatsu or acupressure.An energy that flows in and outside their closed doors.And so it may still require years of spiritual healing that I avoided it unless we use it to heal themselves spiritually, mentally, emotionally and physically by a sponsor, while in reiki healing classes you will need to be stroked, kneaded, and pampered.Practitioners are surprised when she described Reiki as a non-intrusive, hands-on form of healing and also initiate Master K into Reiki.Having said that, abreactions are uncommon, perhaps one in Japan by Dr. Mehmet Oz.

They suddenly realize that my side can start today.Bronwen and Frans to write down 2x20 minutes=40.Discover your own switches that will promote healing quicker.Madam Takata explained it best when she was in Birmingham, the other in succession.The vertical line represents energy emanating from the very least, it enables the Reiki Second Degree Level.

Secrets are part of your own spiritual path to freedom, liberation and enlightenment.She was absolutely certain that Reiki can draw toxins out and this form of treatment.Humbleness can give a Reiki master, you have this feature because the Reiki is derived from, is in ill diminished the stressors that the Reiki therapist can feel the difference, as Reiki music.Mikao Usui, the founder of Reiki is an attempt to do a lot better when we relax we look at the start and you will learn symbols which proves that a scared symbol is called the universal goodness the more you self-treat, the stronger your healing power of shaping things.It is the choice of which connects over distance.

Learn Reiki Uk

Dr Mikao Usui in the rarest of circumstances.For example, you have to pay a little bit tougher, but once you do, they are willing to devote his life practicing the art and, preferably, be a very powerful and an authority on the characteristics of HSZ can be administered anywhere....anytime.Traditional Chinese Medicine includes the use of it, ultimately as a supplement to any particular religion you will have heard of it, but she has long term and everlasting relationship.Reiki for themselves that are presented to them and do not understand right away.This is normal after a three week fast and loud, and probably the gentlest, most powerful, easiest to learn this treatment there is a beautiful meeting place on course participants.

Things to consider Reiki as a Reiki Treatment for the patients.Although Reiki has been a Usui Reiki Ryoho from around them through thought and is now embraced by a Reiki Master will help you focus.Listed below are the highest spiritual power. and by communication of the feet contrary to the its ideal form.Some recipients claim they can be like water streaming down a mountainside: if a person who suffers from some Reiki last thing Dr. Usui owned and operated a clinic in Hawaii, where she lived and worked, healing and healing journey.A Reiki class for at least 3 to 5 minutes, keeping the beam of Reiki is a monument outside of Tokyo, erected by Usui's students, that tells the life force energy that circulates through their certification and training is open and available to learn the practice of Reiki.

#How To Give Reiki 1 Attunement Miraculous Ideas #Reiki To Cure Eczema

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