#Fuck I hate that im aging... Like im not going to be able to enjoy life in my youth and ive already wasted it
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Hiii can you please do Charles leclerc x innocent reader and they have been best friends since childhood and he’s so soft for her and protective and like daddy and baby girl relationship please 🙏
Sure girl, hope you enjoy 😮💨
Just with me ❤️
Summary: you always saw your childhood best friend charles dating so many girls but you were there with no boyfriends so you decided to go on a date with a guy you met on tinder which charles definitely hated
Warnings: nsfw, 18+, daddy kink, size kink, innocence kink, praise kink
Although you and charles were friends since you guys were kids but nowadays you feel like he isn’t the kid you were friends with anymore. He’s a man now. A grown man. A man who always goes out with girls. He’s never single. But at the same time he made you feel like you’re someone special. Someone he can always trust, he can always share a laugh with, someone who he needs to protect at all cost. He always made you feel so safe. But no matter what, he was dating others that made you feel jealous but he knew that you would never date anyone since all your life the only guy you know is charles. But surprise, you downloaded an app called tinder where you started to talk to this guy and tonight was a date night with him.
You got all dressed up and left for your date. After arriving at the restaurant you scanned the whole place to find the guy you met on tinder. After a while you saw a hand raise signaling you thats him. You then settled yourself down and smiled at him. God, this is so awkward. You guys had dinner and talked a little but it wasn’t that much of a nice date. Honestly you dont even know why you’re here. Maybe competing charles in this was a stupid idea. “Hey um.. i had fun but i guess i gotta go now. I’ve got some stuffs that needs to be done” you said as you grabbed your purse and got up and you felt a hand grabbing your wrist harshly as you turned around to face him. God. He was not looking safe. You got so scared and tried to pull away but he grabbed your wrist hard and pulled you closer to him. You tried your best to pull away. “Let m-me go!” You said sounding frustrated. “You’re not gonna leave until we do something fun. We’ve met on tinder for a reason my love.” He said calmly as you started to scared.
You were a virgin. Although you’re charles’ age yet you never had sex with anyone. Your mind started to wander as you were hoping to see charles somewhere at the restaurant and thank god. Miracle happened, you saw charles from a distance and caught his eyes. At first he waved and smiled at you but his smiled slowly disappeared as he saw you with another guy. Someone he definitely doesn’t know. Someone who looks really unsafe and psychotic. Charles’ expression was a concerned one as he came to your table. “Whats going on here y/n? Who’s this guy?” Charles asked as he pointed a finger at him. You were so caught up in that situation that you weren’t able to answer his question. “Y/n?” He called out and you flinched and looked at him. “Im her boyfriend” that guy from tinder said as charles turned around to look at him and then looked at you. “Boyfriend?” Charles asked, looking at you as his brows furrowed. “Where did you even meet him?” He asked you. “On tinder” you said sounding embarrassed. Charles then scoffed as if it was just silly to him that you went on a date with someone from tinder. “But charles he’s not my boyfriend!” you explained and he just nodded and smiled. “He was kinda forcing me to sleep with him” you said, your words were like little whispers. Charles’ smile faded as he looked at you, his eyes so serious, his stare burning you. His jaw clenched when he say you so uncomfortable in front of that guy.
It felt like a movie when you saw charles punch that guy out of nowhere. Everything just happened so fast. “What the fuck man?!” that guy shouted as everyone looked at our way, gasping. “Charles! Stop please!” You screamed at him as you tried to pull his away from that guy whose nose was bleeding right now. “Apologize to her, right fucking now! If i see you near her again I’ll fucking kill you. I fucking swear you’re gonna be fucking dead.” Charles said as he grabbed his collar. That guy then got up and immediately apologized to you and left murmuring some “total asshole” or something.
Charles then turned to see you looking up at him. He then went closer and hugged you tightly and kissed your head, brushing his fingers through your hair. You let out a long sigh as your grip around him tightened. “Its okay y/n, im here now. You’re always safe with me, i promise” he said as he looked down at you smiling softly as you smiled back at him.
After reaching home, your home, you laid on your back in your bed as you groaned because you were tired as charles took his shoes off. You turned your head to look at him. “Shouldn’t you be with your i dont know 8th girlfriend of this month right now? Why are you here?” You asked. His face was really pissed for some reason, and you didn’t know why. He came closer to you so he was standing right in front of you as you looked up at him. God, you always loved him so much. He’s so beautiful. His thumb brushed your chin as your mouth started to part a bit. “Its so cute how you think you can date others just because i always date others. Well good news for you. Your trick worked. You did make me jealous” he said as he leaned down to whisper in your ear “but i know you’re always waiting for me. I know you’re still a virgin only for me and its so cute” his words made your heart beat faster as you looked at him, his smirking face making you more needy for him.
“But you’re always busy dating others. Im tired of waiting for you charles” you said as you sighed. Charles just giggled at you “you’re so innocent baby. you do know that right?” he said as he brushed your hair away from your face. “I always loved you, i just wanted to see how you would react to it. And it’s so cute that you wanted to make me all jealous for you” his face was just an inch away from yours. You parted your lips but he just smirked and pulled away giving a soft kiss on your nose. You then whined out as Charles sat on the edge of your bed and rested his upper body’s weight in his palm. “Get up baby girl” he said as you got confused. You got up standing in front of him as you looked down at him. “Take all your clothes off baby girl, nice and slow. I wanna see what I’ve been missing all this time” he said as you softly smiled at you. Your cheeks grew red as you unbuttoned your top and pulled your skirt down along with your panties and unhooked your bra. You then bend over to take off your heels but charles interrupted you as he got up and towered in front of you. Although you were wearing heels yet charles was like a giant in front of your figure. “Keep those heels on, you look so hot like that, so pretty. All for me baby girl?” He asked as you nodded. He then cupped your face and made you look up at him “you gotta speak with that pretty little mouth of yours baby girl”
“Im all yours charles” you said he smiled but his smile disappeared after few seconds. You were feeling so needy just by the fact that you were naked while charles was still fully clothed. You were wearing nothing but your black heels. “Charles? Baby girl i dont think you’re that innocent that you dont know what to call me” he said as he brushed your cheek with his thumb. “Im all y-yours daddy” you said softly as you looked up at him. His smile grew as he kissed your lips softly “that’s my good baby girl” he said.
You dont know how much but you were literally squirming for him right now. Your legs on his shoulder as he kept teasing you by rubbing your clit with the tip of his dick. The wet sounds it made was making you more whiny and needy for him. “Please daddy j-just fuck m-me please” you begged. “Are you sure you can take it baby girl? Can your pretty little pussy take it like a good girl?” God his words made you so over the edge right now. “I-i can, please d-daddy” you whined out as charles pushed his dick inside of you. Your jaw dropped as your head fell back and your grip on his forearm getting tighter. “Fuuuck you feel so good baby girl, so fuckin good” charles groaned as he fucked you in a slow pace, letting you adjust first.
“Daddy i-its so f-fucking b-big oh my god!” You screamed those words as charles’ pace got faster. His hips slapping your ass as he thrusted harder inside of you. “You’re so perfect baby girl, so beautiful fuck” he said breathlessly as he groaned more. His groans made you come closer to your orgasm as you felt your legs starting to shake, forehead sweating as you bit on your lip to adjust to the staggering amount of pleasure he was giving you. You couldn’t even tell him before cumming, you were so caught up in your orgasm that you forgot to tell him that you’re gonna cum. You then let out a loud groan as charles stopped his pace and stayed in that position for a while.
You then got up and sat on your legs as you looked up at charles and he knew what you were thinking. He jerked off as you sticked your tongue out. His groans were getting louder and you looked at him straight in the eye as he came on your face, some landing in your mouth and some all over your face. You then smiled at him innocently as charles brushed your hair off your face as he looked at you with a soft look on his face “you’re so beautiful when you’re just with me and no one else baby girl” he said as your smile grew bigger.
A/N: requests are open! feel free to ask what you want me to write! luv you ❤️
#f1#f1 x you#f1 x reader#f1 x female reader#f1 imagine#f1 x y/n#formula one#f1 fanfic#charles leclerc#cl16 one shot#cl16 x y/n#f1 smut#charles leclerc smut#cl16#cl16 x reader#f1 fic#cl16 x you#formula 1#charles leclerc x reader#charles leclerc x you#f1 2023#forza ferrari#ferrari#ferrari f1#scuderia ferrari#charles leclerc x female reader#charles leclerc 16#cl16 imagine#cl16 smut#formula racing
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Clone Danny: Dan interlude 7.5
i'm writing this because im struggling to come up with the next part to the clone danny au. however I have had many thoughts about our resident evil man. So if anyone remembers part two of this au, I mentioned that I wanted to make Dan's circumstances a little different than canon, considering Danny's circumstances were different. I'm not sure where I got the idea that Dan wouldn't be inclined to destroy the world after his creation, but i'm sticking with it because I love to explore new things in aus. So 👏 DAN and i swear i might end up calling him a different name because ong i cant stand the name Dan
so. Dan. Dante? I like Dante. but i'll call him Dan for the time being. So: clone danny is not a halfa, right? not really at least. he has a core and he has the ghost sense but nothing else. big difference in canon already since there's no 'ghost half' for vlad to rip out like in canon.
Danny's family is DEAD. disintegrated [exaggeration] in a nasty burger explosion. so he's. bruce wayne levels of depressed. real bruce wayne-core
Vlad, instead of offering to tear out his ghost half, instead offers to try and find a way for Danny to be safely reunited with his family in the afterlife
(he's lying. he's gonna try and make danny a halfa)
Ofc, Danny with his ghost-core obsession being family-based, agrees. he's desperate and depressed. ripe for the picking
Vlad gets everything set up. But turning a human into a halfa is risky risky business, a 1-and-100 chance to happen successfully
so. Danny dies in the experiment. painfully. and he comes back immediately as a ghost. essentially murdered
and ye gods is he PISSED. Vlad lied to him. Vlad lied to him. Danny is a family-obsessed ghost and Vlad lied to him about his family and then he killed him
Vlad is a dead man
Danny doesn't just kill Vlad, he destroys him. He never merges with his Vlad's ghost half because he doesn't want power he wants him fucking dead.
SO dead Vlad is.
now where does this leave our precious, freshly ghosted, full-of-rage Daniel Fenton?
not destroying the world thats for certain. and, well. that's not to say that Danny couldn't go on a blind, grief-stricken rage that results in him becoming the walking apocalypse. he could totally still do that
do I want to do that? well, i don't hate the idea however I personally enjoy the idea that I came up with in the alternative
with Dan no longer a one-ghost-apocalypse, how does he become Danny's TUE? My solution: time travel. Danny doesn't go to the future to go see him, Dan comes back to the past to go see Danny.
i am not partial to the idea that ghosts age over time. So for the last ten years Dan has remained as a dead 14 year old kid the entire time. I like to think its more tragic that way.
At some point during those ten years, Dan figures out that time travel is real. And he becomes obsessed with figuring out how to do it so that he can go back in time and take his past self's life and get his family back
Yeah. a real Miguel O'Hara right here folks
Dan succeeds in his time travel, and suddenly the Phantom's nightly patrol is being interrupted by a ghost that is... unsettlingly similar to him.
Dan knows himself better than anyone. When he finds out time travel is real, he spends his time researching it and growing stronger. He needs to be as unpredictable as possible. He knows that his past self will be in his prime as the Phantom and will be used to adapting to unpredictable and seemingly invincible enemies. He needs to be able to beat that
So. Dan and Danny fight the first(1) time
Danny gets his ass handed to him
Dan reveals himself and goes on a villain monologue. Dan's ghost form is different than in canon, since its a close replica to Danny's Phantom gear. The only difference is that Dan's white CJ Mask has black tear streaks down from the eyes that are blotchy and smudged. As if he'd been crying ink. There are a few other subtle differences too, like Dan has a few trinkets that are motifs to his family, but i can't think of what without cluttering up his outfit
Dan can't kill Danny, unfortunately. As its his past self. Killing him would result in Dan ceasing to exist. However he can imprison him or overshadow him. Dan overshadows him, and Danny goes under.
This is chalking up to be more traumatizing for Danny than I thought
Danny is only partially conscious during the overshadowing. It's like one of those weird vertigo dreams. something is wrong but he doesn't know what
And it's actually his friends that help realize that something is wrong. Dan may be Danny, but its been ten years since he last saw his friends. Something has to give. Whether it be the subtle strangeness in his behavior, a dip in his humor and morality, or the way he speaks like he's reminiscing.
This idea is diverging more from canon than i thought, but Danny does eventually kick out Dan and defeat him. But its right before the nasty burger explosion. Danny can't make it in time, but Dan does. A very sudden save that Danny wasn't expecting and is confused about
Danny eventually meets up with Dan later that night to interrogate him, and brings Sam and Tucker with. They find out his whole tragic backstory
And the few days Dan has had with Sam and Tucker and back with his family have kinda reminded him what he was like before his death and before rage and grief took over his afterlife
He's kinda mellowed out slightly -- or at least snapped out of his obsession mostly.
they talk. Dan talks about what happened in his timeline. probably breaks down and cries, allowing him to properly process the grief he's been avoiding for the last decade
there's no forgiveness yet. Dan overshadowed Danny (terrifying him in the process and realizing that despite everything, there are still things that ghosts can do that Danny's not prepared for. he needs to prepare), tried to take over his life, and was all around violent and cruel to him out of jealousy and desperation. However, there is a chance of redemption
Dan doesnt want to go back to his time. his family isn't there. he's alone. he doesnt want to be alone. he's fourteen years old and dead
but... but he knows he doesn't belong here. his time with the fentons has passed, and he has an afterlife to look into. he can't... cling to the past. and its a voice that sounds like jazz saying this in his head
"you can visit" danny says after a moment, seeing the fear on dan's face. he's a bleeding heart through and through, even if he resents Dan just a little bit for what he did "you know how to time travel, right? I don't think there's any harm coming to visit"
"or," tucker says, "we can visit you! you can show us your time! i want to see what technology is like in ten years"
Dan... looks hopeful. and they mean it too. yes. visiting... that makes him feel better. "if Vlad gives you trouble don't be afraid to tell me" he offers in turn, and smiles wide and toothily. much too wide for a human. "i'll be happy to handle him again"
Danny makes a mental note to never let the two meet. "i will"
and Dan disappears
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Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 4.5 (Dani interlude) Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 7.5 (Dan Interlude) Part 8
Masterpost
Taglist:
@the-navistar-carol
@thought-u-said-dragon-queen
@gin2212
@youracearocroatneighbour
@luckybyrdrobyn
@deeplyconfusedbear
@epilepticnerd
@beautifulmomenttodrawblank
@sara0055
@blusunkhild
@letmesayfuxk (?)
@latheevening226
@tkiesai
@rosedasy
@meira-3919
@igotafewbadideas
@princessbelix
@cyber-geist
#danny phantom#dp x dc crossover#dp x dc#danny fenton is not the ghost king#danny fenton is a clone#dpxdc#dp crossover#dpxdc crossover#'i love to explore new things in aus' is starry speak for:#im allergic to following the blueprint i have to make an idea my own or i get hives#my college bed is currently hurting my back so im staying up to write this#stay tuned i may just make my 'danny is a jason todd variant' au public if im awake any longer#so i went to bed before i finished this SO if anyone shows interest in my jason todd variant au in the tags or the comments#then i will still make it public#dan is such a nonthreatening name and i know thats prolly the POINT but oh god do i still hate it#Neil or Dante is what i've been calling him#or Wraith / Rath#atsv spoilers#just to be safe with that miguel ohara line?#redemption is a slow and painful thing#Dan cries when he returns. really cries.#and Danny goes home and starts figuring out a way to prevent overshadowing#he has nightmares for weeks afterwards#I want a Dan and Danny friendship#see an alternative ending: Dan stays in the present and (eventual) twins Danny and Ellie become triplets Dante Danny and Ellie#we have dan and ellie and dan and jazz#i want to see a dan who becomes fiercely protective over his past self and joins the scary dog club with one Eleanor Fenton#not seen: Dan(te) moves to gotham and accidentally befriends 30 year old Jason Todd and eventually becomes part of the wayne family#danny has to go to the future and tell dan that they're clones#when Dan's in the past he's Dan but when he's in the future he's Danny and vice versa
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idk i urge you all to please please be kinder to yourself and your brain and your interests idk. i know that in this day and age we have to be critical of our interests but you can Do that and still be able to admit that You think this thing is fun and cool. maybe its got some writing issues or maybe its got a funky fresh different format or media type, maybe its a youtube series or a podcast or whatever that isnt your typical netflix tv show or book but its still Your thing and if you love it then no amount of like . societal pressure should be allowed to rob you of that enjoyment or make you feel ashamed to have an interest that isnt a Common or Typical fandom because there is a very very broad wide world of content out there. you shouldnt have to like open every conversation about your special interest/interest with 'this is the worst piece of media alive i hate that im into it please never watch the things i enjoy because you'll fucking hate it' (in a deadly serious way not like the silly way)
idk . what happened to whimsy. what happened to sillyfun. what happened to showing people that you're excited about things. maybe its not for them, maybe it Is badly written. but thats still Your thing and the more you tell other people that its dumb and horrible the more you condition yourself that you have to feel ashamed that your brain has latched onto it and wont let go. you condition yourself that you need to isolate yourself in your passion and that no one else is ever going to share it because you like something Horrible and grueling and frustrating and you have to tell everyone that. disclaimer, you say: this is the worst thing ever even though i love it so you shouldnt put yourself through it. because i just know you're going to hate it and you're going to think im cringe and stupid for still kind of liking it. but they might love it, or at least give it a try Just for you. Thats Love.
the more you ridicule your brain for latching onto the 'dumb' stuff and being genuinely interested in it .. the more you feel ashamed that you want to infodump about it and in the same breath feel like you have to warn people to never touch your interest with a ten foot pole. maybe they Want to indulge maybe they want to understand what you talk about. maybe they will Agree with you over those Plot Holes and Writing Things and you can talk about it idk. be nicer to your brain. let yourself have a Thing that you feel ecstatic to talk about and analyse and make art about. tell your friends you're having fun. doesnt matter if its silly or theres errors. sure you might be cringe but you are free.
#obviously discarding like. genuinely Not Okay media/irl people#obviously excluding problematic media that goes beyond like. 'a little bit weird or funky or badly written in places'#there is a Big difference between those things#there are essays to be written of the state of minecraft fandoms post-You Know What. but thats another conversation altogether tbh#in general i just wish people were kinder to themselves about liking things. no shame
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i've decided that it doesnt matter if i fear i might be transgender just cuz of x
i fear i might be trans just cuz i feel uncomfortable with people treating me as nothing more than a sexy doll, just cuz i feel uncomfortable when people see me and they immediately think about sex.
i am uncomfortable with the thought of female sexual roles being associeted to me in other people's mind, and i want to control this as much as possible.
i am still really uncomfortable with the thought of sex and i dont let myself enjoy my sexual life cuz the shame and the uncomfortableness is just too big.
my friends still are shocked when it comes up and they discover i've been active, i've been the dominant part all the times. cuz they see me and then think about me as a sex doll and i hate it cuz it's not their fault and it's just the way society is built but it's not my fault either and i dont want to be associated with sex in this way.
im not a top, i am a switch, i probably would enjoy partaking in sexual acts in other positions of control, but i dont feel comfortable with what derives from it.
i fear im gonna be treated as a class B citizien Even More.
but being a guy, no one would care. being a guy my personhood would not be diminished because everyone assumes im dominant, so who cares. I feel helpless, and it doesn't help that the people around me comment on my body, on my boobs and my ass all the time to say how fuckable i am.
it all comes down to this, being born a female:
how fuckable i am in the eyes of others.
BUT THERE IS MORE TO WOMANHOOD THAN THIS and i love women and i dont think about sex when i see a pretty woman, even when she's dressed in a way that may lead most to think immediately about sex, i just see a fucking person.
so i dont understand why (in my mind) this applies Only To Me.
only I am perceived the wrong way.
that's why i feel i'd be more comfortable being a boy. and i've been a boy for a while now and I Am much more comfortable, really. But not everyone knows I'm a boy cuz im still stuck dressing in a way that communicates "womanhood" to the people around me.
I am not allowed happyness cuz it doesn't matter how much i try, everything everyone sees when they look at me is a fucking fleshlight that walks.
i feel like i am being denied personhood.
to think about my gender as something totally unrelated to sex for the past years has been so freeing
i have been experimenting: my gender is gaming, my gender is neon colors, my gender is black holes and nebulas, my gender is space pirates, my gender is gayboyfag, my gender is flapping my hands when im excited, my gender is glitter, my gender is an artwork made in paint ms.
this has been a liberating experience
but it's not enough yet
i need to start wearing clothes that match this idea that i have of me in my mind. i would love to be a lesbian too, if it weren't that i am bisexual BUT I STILL WOULD LIKE TO BE A LESBIAN
Like, I Mean if i lived 20 or 30 years ago, i would be rolling with the butches and the femmes, i would have found community with them, i would have started a riot grrrl band.
but i started "pretending" to be a boy on the internet when i was age 13/14, and i dont think that the liberation that i find in being perceived and treated as a boy (or boy adiacent genders) is gonna go away soon
so yeah, i think im transgender, im not an imposter, i really am.
why? cuz thinking about myself as a boy has only made me happier since i've started, and it has helped me get on the path to liberate myself from social pressure about sexuality and behaviour/manners.
if thinking about yourself as X gender makes you happier, EVEN IF YOU DIDNT THINK OF YOURSELF AS X GENDER ALL YOUR LIFE, then by all means i think you should be able to say you are X gender.
Chase happiness
Create Your Self
#trans#transgender#trans thoughts#gender#thoughts on gender#sexuality#tw sex#sexualization#self esteem
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HOW CAN I CONTACT NICK PLEASEEE IM A 13 YR OLD SILLY GIRL WHO IS INFACT MENTALLY ILL IM ACTUALLY PERFECT FOR HIS STANDERDS PLEASEEE I NEED TO TALK TO HIM :3
For your own sake I’m hoping this is a joke
If it’s not, here! I’ll give you the full details on what to expect if you contact him! Because I met him when I was 14 and also a mentally ill silly girl!
Expect to be brutally raped. This is not gentle, you will be bleeding for days. He will slam your head against walls and choke you to the point you are gasping out for precious air, it’s not a sexy kind of choking. It’s the kind where it hurts as you struggle to breathe and suffocate slowly. It’s a near death experience on the regular. Speaking of near death experience! He will threaten you with knives, he held one to my throat. It’s an indescribable feeling, when you feel your stomach sink as you realize your life could end right there at the hands of another human. It makes your body react in ways you can’t control.
You will find yourself sobbing and crying, because he will make you feel insane and delusional for thinking anything is wrong with this relationship. You will beg him so many times to stop hurting you, to stop raping you, he will not stop. He may apologize after, but he will do it again.
If you’re like me you may even attempt suicide while dating him! Don’t expect him to visit you in the psychiatric hospital, he doesn’t care about you that way. But he will use your body again as soon as you’re out.
He is a parasite too. He thrives off of tons of people. Expect him to hurt your friends! He raped my friends too! We all hid our scars we received from him from each other, we were too ashamed despite all of us hurting because of him. You will feel intense guilt for being the reason he even knew them.
There is also the subject of family and loved ones! Years after this you may finally have the courage to tell them what you went through. They will feel shame and anger and guilt for having not seen the signs, for having not helped you. They will look at you for the rest of your life knowing how much you were hurt and they will hate themselves for letting it happen to you. You will always see it behind their eyes, it never goes away.
It never ever goes away. You won’t be able to maintain a normal relationship ever again. You can try, but every time someone touches you, you will struggle to not flinch, to not think they will hurt you too. Sex will never be enjoyable, your mind will always remember the ways you were hurt and violated. The way you gave someone so much trust to be intimate with you, and the way your trust was quickly broken.
And what about the rest of your life? Well! You will be so mentally fucked, you will cry for days on end about how you lost your childhood, lost your innocence to a fucking creep. To some fucking loser. If you’re like me you’ll be too depressed and traumatized to make anything out of yourself! You just become a shit college dropout addicted to drugs that help numb the pain.
Do not make the same mistakes I did. I thought I was so special and mature for having an older guy pay attention to me. Older guys who go after little girls do so because they are losers. No girls their age like them. They know how to utilize their power over you. I get wanting to fall into self destruction, I was the same. But please do not ever subject yourself to people like this. It isn’t worth it.
I only hold onto this url bc I don’t want “stans” of his taking it and glorifying him. He is a monster. Years later I still have nightmares about him. Even recollecting everything to answer this ask had me breaking down, but if I can tell the honest truth, in such a way that no child will ever have to go through what I went through, I will.
Please just do something better with your time. You are young, enjoy it while you are able to. Have fun, be silly, pick up creative hobbies. Live your life for YOURSELF not for some fucking man who will not give a shit about you later.
#sorry to word this so harshly but#I want this to scare you#bc I didn’t know the truth of how awful he was as a kid#and maybe if I had known what he was really like and the long term affects#maybe I would have been too scared to talk to him#ppl told me to stay away but never really told me why#maybe having something more definitive will work better than just a “stay away”
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you seem like a good person with genuinely nice intentions- i also find it really awful when people go "dont bully people because they COULD be autistic" instead of just saying "don't bully people." the idea that someone hates me, or thinks im cringe, but chooses not to be rude to me because i seem autistic to them is way more hurtful than them just bullying me... (obviously the ideal is for them to never bully anyone) and the argument that we shouldn't bully individuals with "childlike/cringe" interests because they might be autistic is really infantalizing, because it assumes that autism and having "childlike/cringe" interests are interlinked when i don't really think that's the case. (using childlike/cringe in quotes because i don't really believe any interests are childlike or cringe, just those are common descriptors used by people). again, you seem like you have really nice intentions, and i'm pretty sure we all agree, bullying is bad, it should never happen, but the idea of not bullying someone because they could be autistic is just harmful to the autistic community + doesn't stop bullying. have a wonderful night, im sorry for sending you an ask <3 im sure you'll get some hate so i wish you the best
Look, you also seem nice. You're the last ask that slid in under the wire before I turned them off completely due to the mass harassment.
That means you sent this before all the submissions and DMs once I turned asks off, where people started getting really fucking nasty. I am trying very hard not to hold those people against you, but it has been a long fucking day.
So, I'm trying my best here to be patient and kind when I write this essay, instead of just blocking or reporting you. You seem like you might be willing to listen. Even if you're not, your message makes a good starting point for me.
Because I have two major problems here.
1: Autism absolutely correlates with preferring media aimed at younger audiences.
This is not universal, and it's not because we're ~stupid~. It's nothing to do with """"mental age"""" or whatever trashfire talking points you've heard. You may recognize the more clinical terminology from diagnostics, even. It's a major identifiable symptom called "age-inappropriate interests and behaviours." (I personally prefer age-atypical; the current technical language is still, unfortunately, age-inappropriate.)
These age-atypical interests are caused by combinations of disability related factors including but not limited to:
Children's media has cleaner sound balancing with stronger dialogue tracks that make following the language easier. There also tend to be clearer pauses and tonal cues.
Children's media is often safely predictable in its outcome. Someone may die, but probably not the main hero, for example. This predictability is desirable for many autistic people in a hobby, as it limits distressors.
Language used tends to be plainer, with less reliance on quick flying quips that are hard to hear/read fast enough, or clever implications in screenplay. Many other autistic people love complex "adult" film specifically because they are fluent in screenwriting and enjoy exercising that fluency. Many more autistic people never learned screenplay fluently. Pretending that all autistic people have the same level of fluency in screenplay is not conducive to having a genuine conversation on this subject.
All of this information and more is available to you it you associate yourself with non-verbal, less verbal, and intellectually disabled autistic people right here on tumblr.
Children's media is often translated into more languages than adult media, especially with dubbing. Being able to hear and read the dialogue simultaneously is a super basic access issue that autistic people are stuck fighting all the damned time, and kid's shows are some of the very few types of mass accessible pop art that actively enable that.
Speaking of mass access: children's media is often very easy to access, with a tendency towards being hosted on multiple stream sites, broadcasting in syndication, etc. This means more autistic people have access to it, and thus by simple numbers, more of them will enjoy it than niche artforms we are rarely allowed to interact with freely.
Media consumption more broadly is a desirable hobby for many autistic people because it can be done alone or with friends, as one's energy levels allow, and both forms can be similarly gratifying. This is a level of control over socialization that is very rare for most autistic people.
You'll also find trends of autistic people gathering around other subjects that have these qualities, not just children's media. Just off the top of my head, both kink and train collecting meet these standards, particularly as regards control, stressors, and access; both are also famous for being disproportionately autistic.
Indeed, this tendency to gather around accessible, controllable hobbies that can be engaged with alone or in small groups creates the very notion of "cringe."
People don't think watching kid's shows is bad in a vacuum: they think that autistic people are shameful, and thus anything we congregate around is shameful too. Including watching kid's shows.
Pretending that autistic people don't have an above average level of interest in media made for kids is nonsense. It's nonsense. It actively worsens everyone's perception of both the diversity of autistic experiences. You can claim that anti-bullying campaigns are bad for autistic people all you like, but no amount of research has ever or will ever back up that claim.
Either you are lying, or you have been lied to.
Autistic people are so well known for this that it's literally how we are identified socially AND diagnosed medically.
That's the reality.
No matter how much you hate it: other autistic people are still going to be drawn to hobbies you don't share, and they are still going to be abused for it. Including so-called """baby movies."""
Enjoying media you don't is not grounds to say that actually the abuse other people face is made up and doesn't need to be addressed.
Liking kid's shows is morally neutral.
You must acknowledge it as a morally neutral statement of fact, not an accusation of personal failing. Liking kid's shows is no better, no worse, no different from liking mid-16th century tapestry, or artsy experimental music from cities I've never heard of in countries I've never visited.
If you cannot even admit that all non-violent hobbies are equally legitimate, then we have no common ground upon which to continue a discussion.
As long as you operate under the presumption that any autistic who is less complex in their interests than you is not worth acknowledging, then you are not worth this discussion. You can try again when you've learned not to be pro-bullying.
Which brings me to
2: You are still, right now, loudly and proudly insisting that being anti-bullying is Bad Actually.
Once you've accepted the fundamentally morally neutral nature of being into something kinda "cringe," ask yourself why your reaction to anti-bullying campaigns rooted in that neutrality is to separate yourself from the other autistic people demanding to be treated with the basest level of human respect.
To then pass on blatant lies about those people (whether knowingly or by mistake), and claim that they are hurting themselves. To demand that those people "stop hurting themselves" by obeying your rules. Rules that, whether you wish to admit it or not, were very obviously made out of ignorance and will very obviously cause great harm.
Those lies are now fueling hatred of a damn anti bullying campaign. The single most milquetoast conceivable.
Furthermore, this is an anti bullying campaign modeled off some of the most successful abuse interventions for autistic people that have been studied to date. It is a campaign started by other autistic people to protect ourselves from the heaps of ableist abuse we receive daily.
And you loathe it enough to join this cavalcade.
But see: the anti bullying campaigns work. They save lives. They improve quality of life in every measurable field. And they have done for literally decades. This is a closed matter. A proven fact.
Whereas spreading misinformation about the diversity of autistic experiences actively worsens that quality of life. Another proven fact, actually.
Your choice is between a proven benefit to autistic people started by and for us. Or a proven detriment that causes huge amount of death in our community.
And right now, with all your genteel kindness, silk gloves and sweet honey? You've chosen "do the thing that makes autistic people suicidal". Worse, you've convinced yourself that this is a good thing. That increased suicidality and abuse benefits all autistic people because the method thereof happens to benefit you.
I don't know how you think it benefits you. Maybe it makes you feel safer in allistic society. Maybe it just boosts your ego with a rush of vicious justice serving glee. Probably it's something else entirely.
Whatever the reason, you've nevertheless chosen the second most common cause of death among autistic people ages 10-35 as the thing you want to support.
See, telling people not to be abusive shitheads because like 70% of their abuse is rooted in an unexamined hatred of disabled people is not """"shoving politics where it doesn't belong"""" or whatever else. It's identifying and acknowledging the root issue, and attempting to actively address it.
So, with all that out of the way:
WHY did you think sending me this misinformation would make me more sympathetic to the literally dozens of people who have done nothing but harass me for 13 fucking hours now?
#ActuallyAutistic#Autism and bullying#Autistic abuse#I'm not editing this anymore you get to live with the typoes
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OC tag game: Intended for Inquisitors but wording it so you can use for other OCs as well! Alternatively you can RB this to make posts for all the OCs you want, in case you don't want to tag others. and feel free to tag me (elvhenprince) or reply to this post so I can see your ocs!
tagged by @elvhenprince :D tagging @streganicha and @broodwolf221 :3
haven't done katari adaar for any of these memes yet so i think it's her turn. also she's so wack that the game's dialogue options dull her down. this gives me the opportunity to talk about the full breadth of her unhingedness <3
katari adaar, she/her, dagger rogue and tempest
i don't put much thought into exact ages so im just gonna toss out 28 and if ive said a different age somewhere else and forgotten, whatever. katari is feral. aggressive, impatient, irreverent, does whatever strikes her fancy at any given moment. she's making josephine's life absolute hell. katari hates it here. she just wants to fight and fuck, doesn't want to be a leader or a hero. doesn't want the chantry's title. she especially doesn't want magic embedded in her hand. when in a more charitable mood or with someone she actually likes (such as sera) she can at least tip over onto the harmless side of feral to have a wild, wacky time.
Associated colours/symbols/animals:
gold / red, dragons
What are their hobbies/skills?
WELL. sex. does that count? it's her recreational activity of choice. she'll do sparring and brawling. just fucking around. tending to her daggers.
Is there any art they are good/bad at, or interested in trying?
closest katari gets to art is blood play
What do they do to relax?
if the mood strikes, she can enjoy a scalding hot bath
What is their comfort food? Do they cook it themselves?
anything sweet and syrupy, which she cannot make on her own. she can do your standard "travelling mercenary" foods, but anything fancy or just too impractical for the road is out of her reach
An activity they like to do with their partner(s)/bestie(s):
sex. rooftop time with sera. sex on the rooftop time with sera. shenanigans. the calmest katari gets is when sera tells her stories about past red jenny exploits. she can actually relax and just listen for once.
drinks and sparring with bull!
Would they be able to lie their way through a card game?
probably by accident. katari has trouble focusing on card games. the strategy just isn't her forte and she gets bored. her bored face makes for a decent poker face though.
With no regards as to whether it exists or is realistic, what would they want as a pet/companion?
dragon. or a quillback!
Do they have a night-time ritual? Does this differ if they are at their own residence vs somewhere else (e.g. camping)?
she doesn't like her hair getting all splayed out and tangled while she's asleep so she might just tie it back at her nape where it won't bother her much, or braid it. she keeps her daggers close, one under the pillow, and one out in the open but in a good spot to reach for it. that's basically it! she's the type to not go to bed until she's already drooping and then she's out as soon as her head hits the pillow.
What is in their inventory?
daggers and knives. some basic medical things for when she needs to patch up because she hates being healed by magic. a letter from her dads, all folded up into a tiny square and fit into a pouch of her armour. she almost never takes it out anymore, but its always there.
Their preferred dress in these settings: Daily, formal, casual/bedding down
katari likes to be at least somewhat armoured always, so wears something protective even day to day when not out on missions. she likes to be prepared and doesn't feel safe when dressed down. if she had her way, she would NEVER dress formally. she hates formal wear so so much and probably destroyed her winter palace outfit afterwards lol for bedding down, just plain shirt and breeches, maybe partially nude when it's hot enough and she's in a place she feels safe enough to be physically vulnerable
After the events of the Main Plot, did your OC go back home, or reunite with their people from before? Why / why not? If they did, then did they bring any new friends/partners with them?
the inquisition doesnt mean a lot to katari tbh so she's eager to return to mercenary life. the thing is though, the inquisition does have good jobs for mercenaries and they don't pay too badly, either, so the valo-kas stay on, and thus katari also stays. she would return to her home village to visit her dads though. while she's not very sentimental, they are important to her and the things they taught her have stuck with her
How did your OC deal with permanent injuries/changes/trauma gained from their story, if any?
not sure actually! haven't even finished the base game with katari so i haven't started thinking about how she'll react to Stuff(tm) in trespasser. she might actually be just happy to not have the mark anymore though because she fucking hates it. and sera's there to help her with it! we'll see. as for trauma, i wouldnt say she "deals" with that lmfao her fear manifests as aggression and she fights until she feels better for the time being. katari is not interested in self-reflection. she will continue to charge forth and hope the trauma can't keep up with her
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vent post, .. putting it under readmore cus its long.
sooo yeah, basically, idk waht to do with my life, and i feel like a burden in the sense that i cant provide for myself rn. i never talk about my living situation but i am almost 29 yrs old, unemployed and having to be supported by my friends cus my family is too poor to help me in any way. like i have to live with my friend’s parents which somehow feels even more pathetic than living w my own parents.. i mean ofc i am very grateful to them for helping me but the guilt racks up more n more each day. when i was 14 my mom told me, ok you’re old enough to work now so you have to get a job if you want literally anything for yourself that isn’t the bare essentials. u want anything other than canned soup for dinner? thats on u. so i got a job, at 14!!! i think back now and im like what the fuck. i was a child... but alas. i worked and worked, i was almost never unemployed my whole life after age 14, except for during 2020 pandemic, and these past few months.
work, work, work, i worked so many piece of shit jobs, i never went to school or anything, there were a few good jobs here n there but they’d always end up getting sabotaged by one of my bipolar episodes. a lot of times, when i was rly desperate, i wld resort to escorting, which i just fucking hated and have been put in a lot of compromising situations and ugh. yeah, what im GETTING at is, ive literally never had security in my life, ive never had resources, the past 15 or so years have been lived in survival mode, and 6 months ago i finally fucking crashed and burned. like, no, i fucking refuse to work anymore, im suicidal all the time, ive never been able to heal from anything that’s happend to me, i dont care if i die broke and alone, i just cant work these demeaning ass jobs anymore. im very grateful to my friedns who have been helping me not die since then, i try rly hard to live frugally, i only eat what i rly need, rarely treat myslef, etc etc.
but now its like, where do i go from here? i know i need to start thinking about generating income again and it makes me so fucking sick. all i can rly do is commissions, but i hate putting a price on art, its only fun to me when im doing it for free. i dont want it to stop being fun. i dont want it to be about money. im scared to try i guess. i definitely dont want to work another stupid job but i also just sit in the house all day and it feels unhealthy. i dont want to meet people, i dont want coworkers, hate putting myself out there cus i cant relate to anyone. hate watching them in real time slowly realize that theres something seriously wrong with me, its embarrassing. i just need something to do.. i dont have a car or anything, i dont even know how to drive because i always figured id be too poor to afford a car. and so far ive been correct about that.
i guess this post is pretty embarrassing too but oh well.. i figure at least on here some ppl can relate.. like fuck i cant even get a therapist to respond to me. everyone just keeps begging me to get therapy as if it will save me. im really lonely w all my feelings and memories. i feel like im in purgatory and all i can do is keep drawing pictures for ppl to enjoy and trying to post things that are uplifting so i can at least make someone elses day a little brighter. but i wish i had a plan or an answer or a real goal. i reallty really really want to be nothing.
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you were into silicon valley at one point right? that's what got me into zach originally, i have an intense love-hate relationship with it like you do with ave 5 lol
it's sort of a potential vs execution thing + i feel like the writing sorta dropped off in the later seasons, characters got flanderized (i'll never forgive them for what they did to nelson "big head" bighetti he was just a normal dude at the start and then they decided to make him the least smart man on earth) & interesting conflicts that could've spanned several episodes or even a season were resolved within a half hour (or, often, less)
i'll be deranged about jarrich forever though especially jared like you CANNOT tell me "this is a half hour ensemble comedy satirizing the tech industry" and then hand me a character with the most gutwrenching backstory and incredible, thoughtful portrayal and expect me to be normal about him. zach woods when i find you
YEAH!!! i totally understand all of that that is very very very fair criticism esp about bighead but tbh im probably a bit blinded by how i got into it - i watched it through for the first time during the massive 2021 melbourne lockdown and then went on to watch it about. 4 or 5? more times in the next 2 weeks so it ended up being a pretty big comfort show to me lol. as stupid as a lot of it was i found it very endearing and i really liked how they were able to poke fun at so many success stories in the tech business having absolute morons behind it. while i do think some of the plots definitely couldve gone on longer i think i enjoy it being a pretty easy to watch comedy that you don't needa stay super focused on for ages especially since there aren't many quality ones like that around anymore at least compared to the late 2000s/early 2010s. i dunno i just!! i get what you're saying its absolutely valid i just really love that dumb show lol
THATS SOOO REAL THOUGH To Be Honest the ones i went more crazyinsane over were dinfoyle like What the fuck was going on there but i loved jarrich too ofc just all the dynamics in that house were crazy. zach woods is a madman though have you seen his instagram
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hrmgmgm 4ever situ thoughts
this will probably get messy and personal because that Really informs how i feel and i need to expel it from my body LMAO
i still dont know how i feel. or well. i know how i feel but its nuanced and conflicted and im mad that i cant concisely say how i feel. we Know the initial information didnt come out in good faith. we Know that the girls involved were not asked how they felt prior to the callouts. we also can see from current actions that this doesnt happen anymore. that it doesnt represent who he is as a person in recent years.
and i fully believe that people are able to change and grow from past wrong actions. regardless of if those actions were just wrong jokes or Literal Actions.
this cycle never gets easier. ive been on both sides e.g. being like one of the girls. but also being one of the ccs. so i get their no nuance just anger. because m still mad as hell about ike/ciel. as someone who was good friends with him. but also was the same age as his victims and very easily could be considered one by some people. shout out to being two people removed from ironmouse though 🤪.
but ive also like. been in the girls situation. you dig back 11/12 years on here. theres Going to be evidence of 22 year olds with thousands of followers flirting with 13/14 year old me. some of whom were harmless friends making weird tasteless no intent jokes. and some of whom were genuine pedophiles that either were complete strangers or people i knew in real life and called friends. and id be fucking pissed if any of those were taken out of or even in context without my permission. because its my story. if anyones going to be talking about it it should only ever be because i decided i wanted it to be talked about. not some random person having a vendetta against people i used to talk to and finding and using bits of my story as a way to defame someone whos recent actions do not line up with the deplorable actions of them in 20 fucking 12.
and so i cant help but have 800 fucking emotions. because what we know about is gross. but i dont believe he should be fully deplatformed over shit he hasnt done in 5-7 years. and that is absolutely fueled by my emotions because as far as we know. the girls did not ask for him to be deplatformed. the girls stories are being spread without their input to ruin a guys life. and i would feel violated if i was used as evidence by strangers against my will.
but maybe thats just the victim brain in me who will always feel the need to shield some of the guys from my past because its complicated and messy and humans are complicated and messy. and im just projecting. because i have been in those girls position. a few times.
and thats why ive been mostly silent through this whole thing. because i am a Hashtag Bad Victim and no one wants to hear from the people who think were being too hasty and think information should come from the people involved. not twitter sleuths who really fucking hate a cc.
that said for people who need to see it written out. im not supporting him with views on future videos. i still enjoy 4ever as a character. i will still probably reblog 4ever art every now and then, because ive also gone thru this in a dnd fandom where one guy turned out to be a shitter but i still enjoyed his character so i will engage with the character when i feel like it. because that character is not the streamer.
this whole situation just feels bad and unfair to absolutely everyone involved. no one here is winning. celebrating his removal is weird. because the removal means something Did happen and thats horrible. and watching this turn into a spectacle to see who unfollows next/what the next announcement is, is disgusting. this isnt a game and it feels like some of you are treating it that way. these are real lives, these are real people.
side tangent.
i really fucking cant stand everyone whos been comparing this to the dream situations. because every single dream situation has come from victims or people posing as victims. so of course. listen to them and do your own research but believe them from the get go. THIS THOUGH????? WAS ADMITTEDLY UNRELATED PEOPLE WHO HATED A GUY, WHO FOR MONTHS HAVE BEEN LOOKING FOR ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING TO DEPLATFORM HIM. AND FINALLY FOUND SOMETHING THAT WAS ACTIONABLE. of course some of us were going to hold off on forming thoughts and were gonna be skeptical of where the information came from because it was not victims coming forward.
its two different fucking situations and acting like theyre the same is insane to me.
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The end:(( sobs cries wails
Time to loop bittersweet symphony
Oh yeah i forgot about the surprise bday jdsvfkgkf tommy is so SWEET i hate him sobs hes sooo<33
I LOVE THEM SO MUCHDHFJDKDF
the fucking fire IM LAUGHFOGNGKG i loved this bit so much its so funny ohmugod
CRIMEBOYSDSS AAAAA SOBS CRIES WAILS
THEY MAKE ME SOOOOOFFGOFUAVEKFKGJDKS
Its sooo lovely:( this fic is so lovely i want to cry picturing the house they live in :( they mean the world to me :( i love hats so much
Petition for u to write a chat fic /hj
The texts are some of my fav parts of this fic 😭 theyre so fucking hilarious bee, I'd consume the shit outta a chat fic if u wrote one
THIS IS SO CUTEEEHDISOFJG IM GOING TO CRYYYDHFJGJ AAAAAA
I love techno shfkgklgf
I FORGOT ABOUT PLAN B IM SCREAMIGNGKDHSIFOFODGKFOSHF HELPPPPP
OMG CIDERRR
When i first read this fic I'd never had cider and was against alcohol bc i thought it all tasted like shit 😭😭 but then once i turned legal age i had cider and DAMN BRO i love cider sm...
I had this delicious berry flavoured one... somersby... so good FHGKKG
I honestly was shocked that i liked cider considering that apple flavoured things normally make me feel nauseous, but cider tasted diff enough that i was able to enjoy it !!!
AAAAAAAIFIVPDUWROFHSBFKFJDFJKDB SCREAMING CRYING PISSIGN MYSELF OHMGUDODHFKGJD OHMGUDOFOD FANS FACE SHFLGOFN I CANT DO THIS OHKHUDOAHDFKSHF FOGMYHUDODDFOAGDOFGSKDHSKFJD THEYRE BROTHERS THEYRE ACTUAL BROTHERS KHMGYDODHDKFMS
"I love you"
NOBODYYYYY MOVE NOBODY FUCKING MOVE OHMYFUCMINGOGDKFHSKFJSOSJFMF
U are SO good at writing music into fics man... ur so good at describing it
ANGELDUO HUG NOBODY MOVE
Youre such a talented author bee, i don't think I'll ever get over just *how good* u are at writing
The way you describe stuff... sk well so pretty rahhsss
AAAAAAAAAAAAA
;-;
I love this fic so much
It is 2 am whoops... worth it tho ❤️
This fic makes me feel so whole i adore it with everything i love ti sosoososo much:( i think it gen might be my fav fic by you... it is so lovely:( it means so much to me
eueueueueueueudufufjgigkg
Also damn yeah bittersweet symphony fit this fics vibes sooo well, its just been on loop for half n hour shfjgkg
Okie i go sleep now, thanks for being the best author ever ❤️❤️
I loved writing the surprise birthday party in this for many reasons. for one thing it felt natural after I wrote about wilbur throwing tommy a birthday party in nocturnal animals, and also I wrote honey and tangerines over the course of the summer. in a way that timeline of tangerines followed real time, because I wrote the wilbur surprise birthday party in mid to late september which is roughly around cc!wilbur's actual bday (yes yes I know he could be lying about his birthday but it's the one we all go with) so it just felt very fitting time-wise
the fire 😭 I love writing tubbo's antics so much
"petition for you to write a chatfic" you do not know the war flashbacks you just gave me with that
you wanna know why I'm good at writing funny texts? it's bc I have experience. I'm never going to publicly reveal my old ao3 (not really out of embarrassment but bc I don't want people I know from that account to find out I'm writing mcyt fic bc I will legitimately lose friends), but on that old ao3 when I was 16 I wrote a voltron chatfic. and it got somewhat popular. not super popular or anything, but it was my most popular fic up until I started writing for mcyt and it's how I really learned how to write humor. anyway the voltron fandom was the worst fandom experience I've ever had and I hated the ship the chatfic was centered on by the time I finished it bc the fandom was just so goddamn annoying about it. anyway yeah I can't write chatfic anymore it brings back war memories LMAO
I love cider man I love going to a bar and getting a nice cold cider if there isn't any beer I want. it's just so refreshing! and yes not all of it tastes like apples! I had a pineapple cider at a bar recently and it was so good
god I had so many emotions writing the card scene between crimeboys just waaaaa tangerines crimeboys i miss you
I'm so glad I write the music in my fics well, I try so hard to integrate it in a way that feels natural and doesn't pull the reader out of the scene
bittersweet symphony is a song that means a lot to me for many reasons so I usually have a rule to never include it in anything I write so it just stays as something for me, but it fit too perfectly for this fic for me to not throw in there and I'm so glad I did
thank you icy you're so sweet I'm really proud of how I wrote so much of honey and tangerines it's definitely one of my favorite things I've done. I'm so glad you enjoyed your reread :D
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tbh, as much as i love hating and being a hater, i think /r tntduo in the nevadas era is rly interesting and if i wasn't a toxic karlnapityolo i think their dynamic would rot my brain So Much. however i do unironically strongly dislike ''right person wrong time'' soft pogtopia era ctnt so fucking much. obvs niki's birthday party happened lol, clearly they have a smth.. going on if you want to read it like that, and while i think it could be fun to look at that like that, i personally don't rly think that kind of hurt/comfort, sitting on the roof heart to heart kind of thing really works with them mostly bc, for lack of a better word, i don't think cwilbur really respects cquackity as an equal rly in s1/manburg era. he calls quackity schlatt's bitch for fuck's sake. (and perhaps this is a little bit fair given how swag2020's victory got started off, but i also am a toxic quolo and i feel like reading the whole story cq pays farrrr more he's got narrative consequences than his narrative crimes and it makes it hard for me to get upset w him also he's my special little boy i don't even care, okay?)
cwilbur has that bossy older sibling thing (/aff) going on where he very much sees his position towards a lot ppl during s1 as a leader, older sort of for lack of a better word authoritative figure who knows better than most everyone. (obvs cwilbur mental illness plays into this but it is also kinda not good lol) and im sort of scared to touch this bc i fear it will erupt into the most horrid rancid discourse to grace this fine earth, but the fact that cquackity is a few years (five i think actually lol) younger than cwilbur absolutely plays into this too. im not gonna sit here and go oh no fictional age gap bad bc i gen do not care about how it makes their relationship "toxic" or not lol. (also rpverse tnt my beloved are the only version of ctnt that wont be just a little but toxic imo tbh, the toxic-ness is where the fun comes in lmao.) however, it very much affects how the two of them interact in s1. it doesn't necessarily make their dynamic Bad or #Problematic or one of them using the other etc i don't think, but i do think it's why pogtopia era tnt content that starts w ''these two make out/fuck sometimes but they're both sad and somehow let down walls to take care of each other'' doesn't really work like it does in the las nevadas era. (which even as the worlds most toxic karlnapityolo i v much enjoy if ppl do it right) part of the issue i think is that some ppl transplant their s3 dynamic back into s1 and treat it like its the same, and i don't really think it works.
to me, its that huge change in the dynamic between s1 and s3 that makes nevadas era tntduo so intriguing. its part of what makes the " i don't think about you" line so hot sexy etc imo, the shift from cquackity being so Young in so many ways and then coming back face to face with cwilbur and being able to stand toe to toe with him now. (i am am not immune to girlboss cq.) its cquackity reinventing himself, he's not the little boy who wasn't worth cwilbur considering as a real candidate, one who would never be worth enough to be a real leader of lmanburg. he's not schlatt's bitch anymore, hes no one's bitch. he's not the naive ditz that stood on a hillside at sunset with cwilbur and was told he was too weak, too scared, too soft to do what's needed to get power. but he's better, he's better than that too, there are no walls around las nevadas, and he'll even offer wilbur a job as his vice when he wasn't even let in the gates of wilbur's nation. hes winning and by god will he make sure wilbur knows it. love her shes soooo crazy omg
(is it perhaps not that healthy mental state no it is not but he is like elle woods but withso many more problems he is moving to a brand new city and teaching himself how to die and so long to the person you begged him to be he's down he's dead etc i love characters sooo much)
also if i have to pick up one more rly good s1 cquack character study that suddenly springs ''then wilbur and quackity fucked in pogtopia'' im going to become the joker slash serious
#and dont get me started on when you read canon compliant one shot collections#and they heavily imply karl and sap are a rebound from wilbur of all ppl#and or ghostbur quackity w. uh undertones that are a little too romantic for my taste lmao#killing biting killing biting#disclaimer that i dont at all want this to come across like i hate ppl who ship ctnt i v much do not want to do that !!!#u guys do u mwah ily i am unfortunately a little hater#soap toxic arc woooOOoooOooo#<- gnf voice#this is sooo mean to poor wilbur for some reason i promise i like the guy catCry#cwilbur lvoeing mutals if im wayyy off feel free to mock me in tags/correct me lol#i always get scared posting about him bc i am v scared of wilburians lmao#this is so long and sucha stream of consciousness im so sry fslkjsdf
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Have a request? Read me!
Okay so ive been running this shit for about a year and a halfish i think its time to talk about how i work. though before we start i just wanted to say im thankful for everyone who supports me or just reads a work of mine. it means the world to me and i enjoy being able to share my writings with a bunch silly and lovely people like y’all !!!
General Rules for my blog!
Please don’t ask me for any personals information lol
like actually
this includes stuff like my age, where im from, etc.
i share what i want on my own private time sooo like
dont ask teehee
Please dont make SA jokes in the comments of my stuff xD
i wish i was joking.
i understand some people use humor to cope
but thats no excuse to be joking about bringing out the rape whistle when a unpopular background character is staring at you
like i really wish i was joking but yeah
Don’t be rude in general in the comments of my stuff lmaoo
like its genuinely annoying.
it’s 10000% okay to not agree with my vision for how a story goes or how a character should react
but if that’s something you want to tell me, do not be rude about it lmaoo like where are your manners
like if you dont agree, you dont agree but neither of our word is law soo...
also dont fucking shame requesters or commenters if they’re actually doing nothing wrong
i’ve had way too many people complain or shade other’s completely reasonable requests like wtf???
but yeah practice some self-awareness before you speak your mind sometimes?
you are not the only person in the room
okay rant over teehee
Some of the stuff on my blog contains sexual material
I really try to give warnings ahead of time
but don’t be afraid to point out if there's something else that probably needs a forewarning
also my words are not gospel
shit can be dramatized (im whore) or romanticized for convenience of storytelling (im lazy) so if youre using this stuff to learn about sex uhhh
maybe dont?
Some of the stuff on my blog contains some dark themes
i also try to be transparent about those things as well
but for the record im in no way glorifying these dark themes
though as someone who is both creative and has seen/gone through so shit i do explore and work through some of these topics to myself as a person and as a writer!
Request Rules and Guidelines
i’ll write anything!! (within reason)
i think you guys can guess a bit about what “within reason” means
and i know the fact that i dont have a “NO LIST” can be inconvenient
but if you’re unsure if ill write something you want? just ask!
you can always ask in dms or in my inbox! either is fine
that means i have the right to deny anything too, of course
long story short, y’all dont pay me LMAOO
i usually wont deny something but i will if it’s...
one: requested while my requests are closed (im sorry but no more means nomore!!!)
two: goes against what i believe in some way (i doubt anyone is going to request something political or bigoted so im talking shit like the fact that i will never write anything that takes place in the state of New Jersey USA because i hate that place so much WHHAHAHAHA
three: you were mean to me AHAHAHAHAHAH
yeah this list isn’t long and very hard to get but i did want to make this transparent
before anyone starts requesting some new jersey aus..........
be respectful !!
not only am i human, im truly am doing this for free (for now, at least) and on my own time
though you should treat people who charge for their work with respect too.
its hard out there for us lil creators lmao
sometimes, less is better.
Super detailed requests can be tricky to navigate.
Again, im doing this on my free time and i average around 1K-2k words depending on what my life is looking like at the moment.
sometimes a super detailed requests require multiple parts that might not be released for a long time.
Or i struggle with getting a story im proud of putting my name while trying to respect the request.
If you want specific details to make the experience more personal to you, go for it
but do you really need to tell me what your request is in 11 full-length sentences? do you really HAHAHAH
also if i aske you to explain something, please be able to explain it bc im not a mind reader and this guess and check thing is kinda stressful
try not to rush me lol
Im checking my blog everyday.
I see your requests and i promise im (most likely) not ignoring you.
i have other hobbies, and a life too, and possibly 20 requests ahead of you.
i try to get everything out asap but sometimes that’s like 2 or more months
BUT if you’re scared that your request may not have made it through the hellsite, send another one asking if i got the request!
i’ll respond to that one if i have!
PLEASE TELL ME WHO AND WHERE THEYRE FROM IN YOUR REQUEST
like actually teehee
It stresses me when i just get a request and all that's included is the situation the requester wants and the character’s first name. Give me the full name or tell me where they’re from before i scour every single series i write for to check for repeat names
its not that big of a deal but im scared of fucking up for you guys aaaaaa
If you send me a weird or rude request as anon, im just going to delete it from my inbox for both of our sake
cough cough THINK LIKE NO PEDOPHILIA LIKE ACTUALLY
and im not gonna specify what i mean by “weird” beyond that just because it’s very much a random situation
im not naming anons but just kinda think ahead of time what you’re asking me (a stranger) to do and publish for you
maybe uhhh...check my masterlist before requesting?
i know its daunting
i know i have a lot on there
but there might literally be exactly what you’re looking for on there HAHA
if not though, absolutely go forward with requesting !!!!!!!
even if what you want is something similar to what i’ve already written, a few changes make a huge difference!
but when in doubt about characters or stories i’ve written before?
check!
if have the right to change the way i write a request (unless specifically stated otherwise)
all this means is that every request (unless a HC is specifically asked for) will start off as being written as a full length average Mania™ fic
if for any reason i decide it would be better in a different format, then i will change it (ex: fic => hc)
UNLESS YOU SPECIFICALLY ASK FOR A CERTAIN FORMAT
then ill keep true to that format no matter what happens
but yeah ! that’s it for now at least. ill update this post if theres more hehe. also if you have questions, just dm me or put it in my inbox :)
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aaa sorry hopefully you're okay with people responding to your rambles (your most recent one that talks about suicide). just wanted to say i'm very very proud of you for healing and i can relate to your post.
hopefully you are okay with me sharing this story but im a young phannie, im 15, and i found them when i was 11 which was a few months before quarantine hit. extremely long story short, for me 11-13 years old were the scariest years of my life and i don't think anything will ever come close to that again (thank god). that's when i used to rely heavily on dan and phil videos (mostly phil). like i just have so many memories of like i don't know, being on a road trip with my family and being completely out of my mind but i would turn on an amazingphil video or a song that amazingphil mentioned and desperately try to immerse myself into that rather than my thoughts. now that i'm 15 (which is like. unbelievable honestly) i see their content on my feed but i rarely ever engage anymore, and when i do it feels like making my inner child happy. it's weird to think that something i held very close to me and that kept me above water for so long belongs in the past now along with really deep trauma. even if i ever get back into binging phil's videos (i probably will because man he is so nostalgic to watch and i just love him) i'm sure i will never engage with them the way i used to, because i'm simply not the same person. it's sad and also really euphoric and healing at the same time to watch yourself let go. anyways that's my 3am rant lol (i have yet to lose younger me's sleep schedule) thank you for listening and please have a wonderful day/night ❤️
I literally relate so hard to this and it’s really comforting to hear similar stories to mine. I fucking hate when people dismiss mental illness if the person is <14. Ages 12-14 were truly the most terrifying years of my life where I truly believed I would not be able to keep living. I’m very thankful I was surrounded by people who took it seriously so I was able to get help early on. But it’s so important to recognize the little things that also got us through. I know there’s a lot of people who roll their eyes when you say this musician or content creator or actor or whatever saved my life and that’s because people take it too literal. I do credit dan and phil and twenty one pilots with saving my life. Obviously, it wasn’t just that. It was years of therapy and medication and healing, but their content, what they brought into my life, was something I needed to hold on to. It gave me motivation. It was a distraction from pain that wasn’t harmful to myself. I connected with people who I truly felt understood me. And that’s something I needed during that period of my life. Now that I’m older and developed a personality and I’m so far from where I was, I don’t need to be obsessive because I don’t need a constant healthy distraction to get me through life. I can just be a regular fan. And still enjoy that little rush of joy I get when they upload. It’s such a unique experience that, though I am so sad people can relate to, is so important and interesting to discuss. I often joke about being suicidal and really mentally ill at a really young age and I know a lot of others do too. And that’s okay, but it truly is important to congratulate yourself for still sticking around. Even if you are still depressed or unhealthy. And it’s okay to have motivations like being a fan to keep you happy and to keep you going. It’s also okay if you’re getting older and you want to let go a little bit. You don’t have to completely abandon it. I know I’m so fucking far from abandoning dnp and 21p. But it’s okay to not be as obsessive as you were. It’s a sign you’ve grown up. You’ve healed. I appreciate so much what dnp and 21p did for me and I still remain a loyal fan, but it’s okay for me to let go because I can live without needing them. Being suicidal at such a young age is a very specific, tragic experience that you can only understand if you went through it. That’s why it’s hard to discuss topics like this without sounding batshit crazy. But I’m glad some of us are here talking about it.
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lmaoo got real clever with the emojis there!
no worries! take your time answering, not like im being any quicker myself lol.
the only pirate theme thing im sort of watching on and off that has me sort of interested is one piece. lmfao yep animooo! i legit dont really watch anything else but anime aha. go watch it you too! it only has over 1k+ episodes and counting lool.
LOL...3 TIMES as long? damn. what the hell was going on? give the masses the fucking deets or something. 😅 "I have no idea what con o’neill was doing but I know what he’s capable of" pff LMAO 😂 what if that was what he kept doing? just going awkwardly as long as he could ooooo daddyyyyy and he just couldnt help himself? OOOOO...PAAAAAAAADREEEEE. shiver ma timbers!
AHA WHAT??? was NOT what i had thought it was going to be, okay okay i legit thought it was going to be..uh...sexier? lmfao its just what i had in mind. when he was done he legit looked like he came to his senses loll.
israels whole wiki is a tad bit...weird. it's not really able to state time of death or location either, which may be understandable? its kinda funny how izzy is portrayed as a 55 year old when apparently israel was like....in his 20's or something. lol...
i wish there was a capybara emoji tbh! now that'd be litty titty.
honestly i was kind of waiting for you to maybe realise that "hol up...is this the same person?" and then boom, ye did haha.
hope ye having a good day too and have enjoyed your weekend!
sorry dumb as all hell but what do you mean with him holding back?
~🐨
ok I hi I took ten years again sorry 😔 imma start putting the rest under the cut bc I don’t wanna shove my long ass replies on everyone’s dash all the time 😅
ohhh one piece???? Ok but like. It feels funny to me that I have definitely heard that name many times and yet somehow still have ZERO clue what it’s actually about. Like actually none. Net zero information. You could literally give me any random, made-up plot of the show and I would be like ‘yeah sure that checks out’. I would have no way of knowing otherwise 😂
AND YEAH EXACTLY. I WANNA KNOW WHAT TF HE WAS DOING. PLEASE RELEASE THE FORBIDDEN TAKES LMAOODHF
ok so you saying ‘ooohh padre’ is SO cursed but it just reminded me of something even fucking worse I found recently 😔😔 I actually thought ‘oh I NEED to show 🐨 anon this IMMEDIATELY’ SHDGHHF. It’s a fucking. The f. The French dub. Of that scene. It’s so fucking bad. It makes the original scene feel like a pleasant dream with how embarrassing the French version is by comparison. I found it at like 3am at night and had a breakdown. please share my pain.
LIKE WHY DOES HE FUCKING SOUND LIKE THAT. WHY. I HATE IT SO MUCH PLEASE SHDHH IT TOOK ME SEVERAL TRIES TO MUSTER THE STRENGTH TO VIEW THE WHOLE THING I KEPT PAUSING IT LMAOO
and on that note DGDGH PLS. NO IT IS NOT SEXY. not one bit it is thee most embarrassing scene ever. he’s a humiliating little man. I love him. He’s so dumb.
and yeah that’s very much what I’m talking about when I say I wish we knew more about him!!! Like…. Israel Hands was rlly walkin around being a PIRATE at my age????? Like I’m pretty sure Blackbeard gave him his own ship when he was like, 17, which is just wild to me. Who was he…. I must know….
damn we do need a capybara emoji ur so right…. Somebody get on that 😤
and to answer your question!! I just… I know con o’neill and I feel like he could do something much worse than the daddy scene if he wanted to 😂😂 he has so much weird horny freak power contained within him…… you don’t even know…
Honestly I WANT him to do something worse in season 2. I want him to outdo himself. I think he’s capable of it 😌
#HI HOPE UR HAVIN A GOOD DAY TOO#ask box#this just makes me think of that incredible video that’s like ‘izzy hands freak compilation’#and it’s just. a collection of lil freak moments except they get exponentially worse as the video goes on#there’s some intense classical music in the background and very funny commentary it cracks me up#there’s like different stages. the worst part is the daddy scene isn’t even the highest stage on the freak scale….
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I LOVE BAD ART
hiii im thyme (ze/zir/they/them), one of the 4 ppl w accces to this acct, and sry for spelling, im dysgraphic + actualy typing and not using speach-to-text like normal
ANYWAYS
i LOVE bad art, and i HATE when ppl get upset i say that!
i grew up w a lot of pressuer on me to be good, definetly in general, but also absolutly w art!! my mom was an artist, and i grew up VERY christian. everything i did reflected on god, and more importantly to my mom, on her.
she was so exited to have a kid who LOVED art and stuff like her, but i was never good enough. she would always tell everyone how good i was, how i was gifted by god, and how much i took after her. (she was v self centered and would majorly talk up anything that made her look good, yikes i know)
so ppl would be naturaly interested and exited to see! and then i would be forced to show them some art, which, keep in mind, was verry age appropriate and full of the generally goofy stuff i loved, and 9/10 they would be dissapointed. even if they werent my mom decided to constantly pressure me to do better.
this was really stressful obv, and i stopped drawing for the first time. when i got into middle school, i started again, this time not really ttelling my mom. i was happier, but had already had it impressed down onto me that my art had to be good to warrant existing or taking my time. i was v stressed by it, and as i slowly started to get more comfortable i was imedietly bombarded with competition.
i struggled to get better in the ways that seemed easy for anyone else, PDA kicked in as soon as i felt something NEEDED to be done, and i was compaird to everyone my age and younger and told how much better theye were.
i never wanted to make it a competition, i just wanted to have fun. i wanted to do something hands on that could express me better than my words ever could (undiagnosed autism at the time made me feel verry weird and thuroughly broken, and explaining that wo imedietly getting invalidating and patronizing answers simply did not happen)
i stoped drawing again. i changed schools and had a better art teacher. she wasnt a dick bout my art, but definetly acted overly suportev(possibly im anxiose and projecting past art trauma onto her lmao and she was just being normal, she was cool af tho). i starded drawing more, on and offf, and got REALLY depressed and burnt out. one of the ways it manifested was being unable to be creative.
but things did get better!!! got an autism diagnosis and educated myself more on my dysgraphia diagnosis(got in elementry school), came out, made freinds who brought me to queer music and caberet shows(tysm phoenix), and was able to move out!
as im now on my own, my art drive has rissen signifigantly, especily as im surounded by other art enjoying weirdos(complementary). but i still hate when someone says that my art is good or bad. constructive advice and support is always valued, but there are so many mediums and people and styles, how on earth do we judge that?? having to be good enough for everyone to warent my own existance and hobbies almost killed me, and sucked all of the joy out of my life.
ive seen people who got so happy to doodle, only to stop forever when someone makes a remark on skill with their age. ive seen family stop bc someone joked abt their stick figures or car drawings, because even if the joker didnt mean it outside of a goofy remark, the joke was meanspirited and ment to put the artist down. I HATE THIS??!?!
WHO DECIDES WHATS GOOD ENOUGH TO EXIST??? capitilism? christianity? the example of two dead ppl from history???
obviosly i dont fuck w that.
art is something made to express something, how are you going to take such a broad catagory and shove it into your biased and sad binary?
so i proudly call my art bad. as an ongoing rebelion against everyone who thought and thinks that something has to fit their binary of goodto exist. i say bd to help myself unlearn the shitty things that were pushed onto me, and as a way of saying i dont have to be anyone's good to warent my own joy.
some ppl will cut in here, theyll tell me not to talk badly about myself (im not). theyl say even if i dont mean it bad, my brain will internalize it as a negative(i dont think that applies here?) or theyll spew some capitlistic bs (HUH, GUESS HOW I FEEL ABOUT THAT.)
no hate to others reclaiming their art and love for it in different ways,this is just how it works for me. in in my art vocabulary, bad means not locking itself into the harsh expectations of good, and i find that incredibly freeing :)
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